Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - The Burner Phone 69: The Most Pointless Voicemail?

Episode Date: August 16, 2023

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The Hits with Jono and Ben's Burnaphone There must be a theory behind that Because we say that a lot And then we go It's just something old people say It is old people You don't want to be that cliche I was talking to someone the other day About the old You know Because you don't see Mates, kids

Or other kids For a while And then you do see them And you suddenly go Oh you Last time I saw And you're like I've slipped into that cliche

Of going Last time I saw you were here But they have changed Their appearance has changed dramatically. Yes, but that's what happens. The kids grow up so much. I find myself biting my tongue in that scenario. Oh, no, I need to.

I'm like, hey, what's up, man? You don't look any different from when I saw you when you were two. Yeah. I'm 16. Yeah, about the same. Yeah. Here we go. I said, why does time go faster as your age?

That's what I've typed into Google, Ben. Some say it's related to how long we've lived. A five-year-old feels a year is long because it makes up 20% of their life. Others point to changes in the brain. 2019 research paper suggests our ability to process visual information slows with age.

We perceive fewer mental images and time feels like it's speeding up. Gotcha. Gotcha. Okay. All right. That kind of makes sense. Okay. Another thing to Google while we're on there is a dog year.

Is it seven years? Oh, yeah. I understand that dogs, unfortunately, you know, they're very small. Dog year. Small, you know, like a dog year, seven years or whatever it is. Each human year is approximately five years for a dog. Oh, so five years. Okay, there you go, five years.

So why is that? What are you thinking? I just wondered, but for them, if it's the same thing, if a human year feels longer to them, I think there's this stand-up comedy bit that I heard when someone's saying, you know, the dog's so excited to see you when you come home because you might have been gone an hour,

but for them it's five hours. You know, like you've been gone all day. They're like, that's five days. You know, that's the comedy bit. They're like, oh, my God, I thought you were never coming back. You're like, mate. That makes a lot of sense. You know, like that's, yeah, as I say, I don't know who the comedy bit that does it to attribute them to,

but there is a theory that I'm like, well, maybe that's true. Why do we do that? Why don't they just live a normal human year? Yeah. So that's why I wondered if it feels longer to them, much like it would feel longer to a younger person. I don't know. I don't know.

Scientists, there probably is no way of knowing because you can't really ask a dog as such. No. But yeah, I just wondered that. How do we end up with these numbers, this article goes on to say? And it's the average life expectancy of that particular breed of dog. Oh, right. So there's no particular, they live 12 months, then they turn one, another 12 months, then they turn two.

It's just averaged out over the life expectancy of a dog. So they're saying, okay, because they think, well, times it by five to get it more into the human life. So the dogs even give a shit? Probably not. You can just say, hey, you're one like a normal one here. Yeah, one like us, rather than go, oh, you're five, you're ten, yeah. That's what I found interesting. Maybe it equates it for

us to go, oh, the dog is like 45 now, that's at what stage? So you're not just going, oh, come on, you know, you're equating it to their mental capacity or their physical capacity and stuff like that so maybe it's helpful for us rather than

the dog to go, oh the dog's actually 80 years old now, the dog's, you know, put it in a rhyming. I shouldn't just pull the rug out of it I'm sure some scientists put a lot of thought into this and I'll just come on a podcast and go That's what podcasts are though, people just spouting their opinions without bloody fact checking or anything. They're snipping them up as little Instagram things and go. Well, that's what podcasts are, though. People just spouting their opinions without bloody fact-checking or anything. They're slipping them up as little Instagram things.

You're like, jeez, that person knows a lot of stuff. That's how I got onto a big fan club of Andrew Tate. I'm like, this guy's dropping some truth bombs. Now, this is what I found interesting, which we were doing some research for the FIFA tournament, was some of the countries that were competing. Looked into Korea, South Korea. Yeah. When people are born there,

they're already considered one. They're not zero. You know how we go, oh, you're six months, nine months, righty, righty, rah. They kick things off at one. They're already a year ahead of the start line. Right.

So they're always going to be a year older than you, even though they're the same age as you, South Koreans. Ah, so they're already, right, so they get their, yeah, okay, that's interesting. How old are you when you are born? And now, there must, again, must be a theory behind this. So yeah, and day one of your birth, you're considered one years old.

They factor in the time you spend in the womb. Ah, right. Which is, it makes a lot of sense because, I mean, you're still alive, aren't you? Yeah. In the womb. Yeah, I guess you are. Especially according to those anti-abortion billboards on State Highway 1. Yeah, okay.

All right. There was also the theory, I can't remember what country it was, but that was a country someone was saying the other day, and again, I'm spouting this off and i don't know if this is true someone told me this podcast baby that when uh their age is counted from when they get registered as far as this particular country i can't remember which one it was because i was saying there was a guy at the school who had a pretty much a full beard and he was in in the rugby team i'm like he's like he seems a lot older than, and they were like,

well, maybe he was from a place that they registered there and so when he was, It looks like a diesel mechanic. Yeah. Yeah. And when he was 15, like playing with 15 year olds,

he was probably 25, but, but I bet, you know, like, cause I was like, this guy seems a lot, you know,

like, I've got here. He's got a family. Yeah. His kids are turning up to watch him play. I've got here on none of the places he's got here, yeah his kids are turning up to watch him play i've got here on none of the places he's got here you know like like this is you know like it was at the head stage i'm like was he russian or something i can't remember what exact country he was but he was good

because good player kevin the team man we shut up about well i just have a shave mate get on the field but he was a good player get home to your wife and kids mate what position did you have oh he was making the back like he played second five uh for a while but he was just pass the ball to him get it to him mate he just just run it was kind of like we had him out on the wing for a while was um you know almost like a jonah type player that could run through everyone but he was kind of almost wasted on the wing because he was like just get him the ball earlier you know so yeah he was very good put a bottom into the package yeah so good on him yeah but yeah so i wondered that i can't remember what particular country this person

said but it's probably not true but yeah all right this is the burner phone you leave us a voicemail uh now i'm actually going to bring some personal content to the to the table to be in voice this is usually you can text 4487 just text burner and you'll get a number sent back to you that you can call and leave a voicemail. But this is from my personal collection. Annie Pryor, which I love my mum. She is a wonderful human being and prolific lever of voicemails. At 11.01am, I'll text. And that's the message.

So she's got the voicemail. She's like, I'll text. I don't the message. So she's got the voice. She's like, I'll text. I don't know what the point of that is. She's waited all the way through there and then she started texting. And I find it's probably that generation as well too. My dad stopped doing it now, but my wife's dad does it all the time. Starts with time. 1031.

It's 1031. It's a beautiful, you know, like we get what time it is. It's 1031. It's a beautiful, you know, like we get what time it is. It's the message received at blah, blah, blah. But it's like,

they love to tell you what time it is. It's yeah, it's 1031. I'm here at the thing. It's a Monday. You know, I've got, apart from the weather,

I guess the weather's a bit of an update, but I'm like, yeah. Does he give a weather update? Sometimes he does. Yeah. It's a beautiful day. Oh,

it's a bit, you know, it's like, yeah. That's more like a radio thing. We probably did the same thing in the mornings to be fair. Yeah. I can see what the weather's doing. Yeah. The old school as well used to do the bloody, pick up the phone.

Hello, 09-528-62, you know, give the number out. Give the number. Yeah. Would Kevin Boyce be like Boyce residents? Yeah. Kevin Boyce. Kevin Boyce. It was Kevin Boyce speaking. Kevin Boyce speaking. Yeah, it was always. Would Kevin Boyce be like Boyce residents? Yeah. Kevin Boyce. Kevin Boyce. It was Kevin Boyce speaking.

Kevin Boyce speaking. Yeah, it was always full name. Kevin Boyce speaking. You wouldn't do that nowadays, would you? You're almost suspicious when the phone rings nowadays. You're like, hello? Oh, no. I think Dad would still do Kevin Boyce speaking most times.

Really? Yeah, he still. I think just out of habit. Should we call him now? Should we call him now? See if he can do a Kevin Boyce speaking. He might be working, but we can do it. Yeah, we'll give him a go.

Is he teaching at the moment? Yeah. Well, let's give him a go. Is he teaching at the moment? Yeah, well, let's give him a go. He might be. I'll just dial his number here. Yeah, I find any time my phone rings, I'm like you now when it's like not a number saved into my contacts. Excuse me a minute. Hello, Kevin Boyce speaking.

Hey! There you go. Hey, sorry to interrupt. You sound busy. It's Jono and Ben here, your son. We just wanted to see if you'd answer the phone with Kevin Boyce speaking still after all these years. Yes.

That's pretty good, isn't it? It is. Very good, Kevin. Who am I talking to? He said, it's Ben, your son. He even stipulated it was your son, too. Yeah, it's Ben Boyce speaking. Jonathan Pryor speaking, not your son.

Yeah. Right. Thank you very much. Out of habit. You've been doing that for many, many years, as long as I can remember, always answering the phone with Kevin Boyce speaking. Well, otherwise it might be thinking it's someone else, and I don't want them to do that.

And the other thing is that if I am personally – Well, I've rung your number. It's your number. Like, I've rung your number, but I know I'm going to probably get you if you answer. What do you want me to say? Is it Colin Thompson speaking? You can say Colin Thompson speaking. All right. Yeah, thank you very much, Colin. What do you want me to say? Is it Colin Thompson speaking? You can say Colin Thompson speaking.

Yeah, thank you very much, Colin. Otherwise, I said you might have to get off the line because the train's coming. Okay, right. We're going to let you get back to work. You sounded like you were busy, but you still had time for a joke. Do you want to hear these kids say hello to you? Okay. Just a minute. Just a minute.

This is Ben of Jono Ben. Say, hello, Ben. Hello, Ben. Hello, Ben. Hello, Jono. Hello minute. This is Ben of Jono Ben. Say, hello, Ben. Hello, Ben. Hello, Ben. Hello, Jono. Hello, Jono. Hello, Jono. Hello, kids.

How you going, kids? Thank you, Ray. Is this all on me? There you go. How's that? Oh, that's pretty cool. Part of the podcast intro. You can tell them that.

There you go. Okay. Thank you. Hey, so have a good day. Podcast intro. Okay. Thanks, Ray. All the best.

All right, bye. Thank you. I love Kev. He's always up for a chat Even when he's in the middle of his job He's busy Excuse me one second I was like We're going to have to start

Another podcast Just for Kevin I know He was ready to go He was starting to think of jokes And all sorts Oh, he's a wonderful man There you go

So he still does a Kevin Boyce Kevin Boyce speaking There you go And that is the Burner Phone for today If you'd like to leave us a message If you want to join The Burner Phone Podcast Text BURNER PHONE like to leave us a message. If you want to join the Burner Phone podcast, text BURNERPHONE to 4487 and we'll send you our digits.

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