Jono, Ben & Megan - The Podcast - The Burner Phone 72: Roaches or a Person??

Episode Date: August 21, 2023

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The Hits with Jono and Ben's Burner Phone happening in her son's life. Because sometimes when I speak to her, she's like, what have you been up to? And I'm like, not much. And I can tell she's like, I know you've been doing more than not much. Yeah, yeah. But you don't want to detail every, you know. So then she listens to the podcast and figures out because we're so desperate for content. We talk about everything now. You're right.

We probably talk about too much. We go from not much to too much. I just got offered a job. I don't want to brag about it, but Anne from LinkedIn said, hello, dear. Text us game three before. A bit unprof but Anne from LinkedIn said, Hello, dear. Text just came through before. A bit unprofessional from LinkedIn.

Hello, dear, comma, I am Anne from LinkedIn, comma, and I recommend a part-time job for you. Oh. And I recommend, that's how it says, with an hourly salary of $70 to $150 an hour, exclamation mark. Crazy cash. So LinkedIn, they just randomly email people and this is a text. She's crazy cash. So LinkedIn, they just randomly email people

and this is a text. Text chapter. For internal testing for some companies' mobile apps. It's easy to work. You can work for one to two hours

each time. You can get work permits at least six times a week. It's up to you to decide to apply. Please reply yes or interested. If you're not interested,

please ignore this iMessage or reply stop and will not receive such push messages wow isn't that lovely from Anne from LinkedIn should we try and call

LinkedIn CF Anne's around yeah well we could do we could do but you know she's not going to be we tried to call that number before yeah I know

why would I even bother yeah you know the answer you're right I love those texts there's a a couple of WhatsApps

The WhatsApp one They've got a text one But the WhatsApp one They're prolific aren't they They're always giving you Random stuff You're like Oh I met you at such and such

You're like Apologies we didn't talk And stuff Yeah a lot of party ones And I think WhatsApp's really Overestimating my social life Sorry let me get this in Like this one This lovely one here underestimating my social life.

This lovely one here from Rachel. It's been a long time. How are you doing, New Zealand love heart? Isn't that nice? She's just checking in. It has been a long time. How long has it been? Another one here from Lena.

It has been a while. You're going to come to yoga with me this weekend? And I can't remember the last time I did yoga with Lena. It has been a long time as well, so that's good. Well, let's clear a message because that's what we do on the Bird of Fine. Okay. Hey guys, Peter here. Big fan of the Bird of Fine

podcast. Hey guys, Peter here. Big fan of the Bird of Fine podcast. I was just wondering, would you rather find a thousand or like an infestation, like a million cockroaches in an attic or someone living in your attic? Thanks for all the good content, guys. I'll see you soon. Thanks, Peter.

Thank you, Peter. Always providing good content Now Producer Joel You're laughing next door You come in here Come in here Producer Joel Was that you putting on a voice

Producer Joel Leaving us a message Why are you laughing Sorry Was that you putting on a voice Were you Peter No that was Peter He's a big listener to the show

Peter I think it was Thanks for all the good content You provide Well he obviously enjoys If he's listening to the burner phone Sending through a message He must be a big fan Of your guys work

So what was the Would you rather Would you rather Have people living in your attic Or a thousand Was it a thousand cockroaches I think he's Yeah he said like an infestation

So like you go upstairs Into an attic And you either find Someone living there Or an infestation Yeah There was a thing I was just gurgling it

While we were listening To that message from Not Joel. And there was a lady on TikTok who discovered there was a terrifying moment to discover someone had been living under her floorboards for months. Months? Yeah, for months under her floorboards in California. Yeah. Apparently she heard some random noise under the floorboards, and then she opened it floorboards and then she yeah

opened up and then she discovered that someone had been living underneath so and what just shooting in at night and shooting out during the day I guess so yeah she could claim the man was yeah probably on some substances at the time that she discovered them got the police around as well and he crawled out from under there. But, yeah, she's like, I think she was struggling as you would be to hang out in her own house after that. Yeah, you never want anyone living under your floorboards. Harry Potter lived in the – I mean, that's one step on from Harry Potter, isn't it?

He was under the stairs. Under the stairs, yes. But I think that was – well, it wasn't by his choice, but the family knew he was there, right? The answer to the question. Okay, so I'm going to go, what would I rather, walk in on an infestation of cockroaches? Who's living?

Do you get to choose a person to live with? No, it's just a random guy. Just a random guy. So one random guy is living in my attic. Yeah. Someone who doesn't have, I guess you say, yeah, someone who doesn't have a home. Then I feel sorry that they need a home.

So I'm like I'm calling the police Yeah I know But at the same time I'm feeling sorry Me too I'd be sorry Get out of my house

Yeah No part of me is feeling sorry Well There's other places to sleep Sorry they don't have a home I'm feeling a bit bad about that But yeah Yeah I don't know

I guess it's why So I'm going to go to the cockroaches Because you just Be like Get the bloody fumigator And blast them out But they've gone everywhere They've gone all through

Your house And now that you've Opened the door But I thought they were Just in the attic Yeah but now you've Opened the door They're going to come

Into your house as well So that's part of the scenario So you know a lot About Peter's message You do You do know a lot Even expanding on Expanding on

I like you really Putting yourself Into the character Of Peter Which I love Yeah Ah okay So now you've chucked

This wasn't in the original No He just sent through An Instagram DM as well Pete Yeah What's he saying now Yeah he was saying

Yeah so the cockroaches Go for your house It's a harmless guy Boom they go everywhere Yeah Well then again I'm just going to get The house sprayed

Yeah I know But it's I mean it's not nice. No. But it's better than having to remove a human being. Yeah, I guess it's both a scary option. You can't exterminate a human. No. No. No. Well, you can't. You can't.

You can't. So don't go wow. Don't wow anything. So then what are you going to go? Oh, God. I'll probably same as you have to go. You had someone running around on your roof. That's right, yeah. Someone did run around

on my roof. Not in the roof. No, but over the top of the house. I woke up in the middle of the night and I'm like, oh my God, it sounds like someone is on, something very,

like he was walking across the roof and then, yeah, I was like, they're pretty sure it is. He was dotting away from the police, wasn't he? Yeah, yeah. Running across the roof.

Smart run, smart getaway method too. Unless the helicopter's tracking you, but if it's just the ground patrol it's scary okay so in that instance would you prefer to cockroach on the roof or on the roof definitely a cockroach on the roof yeah yeah absolutely in the house yeah probably still the reluctantly the cockroaches although not a nice insect what's your what is your least liked bug from you both? Least liked bug. I mean, cockroaches would have to be up there for some reason.

Yeah, I used to be really scared of cockroaches and then living in a flat for a couple of years, you kind of get accustomed to them walking on the wall and stuff. They become little pets. Exactly. Wetters. I saw on the on the AM show this morning as well

they were at the zoo with a wetter the size of like two of William Whitewood's hands so I feel like you wouldn't want one of those crawling around your room

you're showing us a video of this poor young lad that got a spider crawling up his shorts oh yeah that was a movie oh that was a movie okay

all spiders like a tarantula or something crawling on your face some of those ones you see in Australia out in the you know people are in the house out in the, you know,

people are in the house and they're like, you know, I'd move out. Like if I saw a spider there, I'd be like, I'll make it to your house. Now I'm out of here. Maggots. Oh, yeah. Had those in the flat, mate. The good thing about flatting is it really lowers your standards, doesn't it? But then as soon as you move back to home or you're in your own place,

you're like, what was I doing? Then when you're in there, it's kind of like camping when you're there you're like i can go without showering or whatever i'm camping and for a couple days it's cool but then when i'm at home i'm like i wouldn't you know i lived in a place we were we were well aware there were rats yeah and it wasn't phasing us didn't phase us one bit we live with mice which are a lot more they're a lot more friendly you know yeah they're a lot they're kind of cute, mice. Cuter, cuter. Yeah, they're kind of cute. It's good to feed pets and stuff. Yeah.

And because no one can be bothered doing anything about it. No. No one takes the bull by the horns. No, everyone's like, well, especially in a flat situation. We've seen it in a Joel flat situation. Oh my God. How many were in your flat? We did.

I was, it was like, oh, we had a feeling there was mice. And we're like, there was a couple of times late at night, it was like, they'd run at your feet. And I'm like, we got to go out. So I went out it was like they'd run at your feet and we got to go out. So I went out and we got mice trapped. We caught eight in one day. Wow. And then, yeah, it was like.

You had a full infestation. Yeah, we moved out a couple of weeks later. We were like, this is time to get out of this place. Leave it to the mice. Yeah. He took my girlfriend to my car. Hello, mate. It's all yours now.

That's what happened. Mickey and Mickey Mouse, very successful business with that too. All right, well, thanks for the burner phone. Thank you to Peter Mouse, very successful businessman. Well thanks for the burner phone. Thank you to Peter too for that wonderful message and if you would like to leave

us one. If you want to join the burner phone podcast, text burner phone to 4487 and we'll send you our digits. You could be on

tomorrow's episode.