Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 140: @Spiderman223 with Cole Stratton

Episode Date: July 29, 2010

Cole Stratton from the Pop My Culture Podcast joins Jesse and Jordan to discuss secret sex parties, Calgary, Alberta, and the next bit twitter star.

Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free. Unto the locks and throw away the keys, and take off your shoes and socks and run you. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. And I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. And this is... Jordan, Jesse, go! Icicles, tricycles, ice cream, candy, lollipops, popsicles, licorice sticks, Solomon, friendly, maggoty, edgy, twidd of speech and more secret sex party talk than ever before.

Let's go. It's Jordan, Jesse, go. I am Jesse Thorne, America's Radio Sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. With us from the hit podcast. Jordan, I found out that this is a hit podcast. It's not just a podcast. Hit podcast. I looked into it.

So it's charting. I ran some numbers. Did some focus grouping. Yeah. The Pop Your Culture podcast. Pop My Culture. Pop My Culture, yeah. Pop My Culture. Yep.

I wasn't confident about it as I said it. I was saying, is it my culture? Well, it's not that big of a hit yet, Jesse. It's big in Belgium. Well, Jesse and I are what we call early adopters. Sure. And we've already moved on to the next thing. But kind of in our wake wake i think people are going to pick up on the popular what's it called the next thing because we're already over it the the next thing is uh custom voices for gps units i see yoda darth vader sure and we're doing dennis franz the whole you can get any member of the cast of NY Blue. That's our thing.

We started out, originally, it wasn't as successful, but we started with the cast of St. Elsewhere. And we couldn't get Denzel. That was the problem. Denzel's busy making train movies with Tony Scott, so he can't do custom voices. But then you found out all your GPS voices were in the head of an autistic child. Right, yes.

But we've had a lot of success with the NYPD Blue Line. We can replicate the voices when the actors aren't here. For instance, I'm Dennis Franz. Turn right. It's me, Zach from Saved by the Bell. Make a left here.

Jimmy Smith's here. You're approaching McDonald's. And they all sound like this. They do. Well, Jimmy Smith's catchphrase on our thing is, I'm Latino, but not like that, you know. So he'll say, like, I speak clearly.

You're nearing a McDonald's's i'm not all chichi what's that uh you guys remember that uh that movie with ellen barkin uh that jimmy smith was in switch i think was the name of it i don't remember that it was this movie in the 80s where like it was one of those body changing movies where she had died and come back to somebody's body one of those stupid things but uh jim Jimmy Smith was in it, but the advertising campaign had already started and all of a sudden he became a hit from something, so they wanted to kind of squeeze him into the commercials. So they just crammed his name into the voiceover at the last minute.

So I was like, Alan Barkin, Jimmy Smith! It's pretty hilarious if you can dig it up. Do we just want to recut this trailer? Nah, just have someone say Jimmy Smith. Jimmy Smith! Edit that in there. Now, you mentioned the fad of 80s movie, the body switch movie. What was, has there been a body switch movie?

Has someone tried to kind of reawaken the body switch? There was a film, Freaky Friday, starring Lindsay Lohan. Okay. There was also 17 Again. Oh, Zac Efron switched bodies with Matthew Perry in that, didn't he? Yeah, I mean, sort of. I mean, he went back to his old body or whatever, but yeah. Okay. Same diff. again with uh oh zach efron switched bodies with matthew perry in that didn't he yeah i mean sort of i mean he went back to his old body or whatever but yeah okay same diff what was happening to matthew perry's body while it was the one body he just reverted back to his 17 year old self

so okay well that's yeah are you sure it wasn't getting fucked i remember it getting fucked but maybe that's just like just a kate like you have the movie where handsome Zac Efron is learning about love and learning something about himself, but then just periodically they would cut to the body of Matthew Perry in an alley getting fucked by a homeless guy. No, no, it was getting fucked by Zac Efron. In my memory, I'm remembering Zac Efron fucking Matthew Perry. This isn't a David Cronenberg movie. No, no, and he had a giant boil with teeth, right? A giant boil with teeth.

Yeah. We all saw this. You know, and there was that one scene where he was getting fucked by the talking car. Yes. Exactly. Baywatch. Yeah. Right.

Exactly. I like the idea of like Zac Efron. Like, okay, so Matthew Perry has changed into Zac Efron. And Zac Efron comes home and he's like, I've had a long day of learning about myself. Good to see you, old body. And then he just peels back the covers and his old Matthew Perry body is there. And then he just starts fucking it. Or he keeps his old body chained up in the basement so it can't get out.

Oh, yeah, and it's like a zombie or something. From the Pop My Culture podcast, Mr. Cole Stratton. Thank you, guys. Did we say his name? No, I don't think we did. I think we got distracted about personal pronouns or whatever part of speech that is. And can I just say, guys, congratulations on booking me. What a coup for you.

Hey, we're excited. You're from the hit podcast. That's right. When I found out I was on. Hey, we're excited. You're from the hit podcast. That's right. When I found out I was on this show, I was excited. We've had some major stars on here,

people we really expect. I'm talking about the guys who make a web comic. Sure. I'm talking about... Guys who make a web series. Guys who make a web series.

Everyone from the entertainment industry. From every corner of the entertainment industry from every corner of the entertainment industry From web series to webisodes You guys should get somebody from craft service on here That would be a big boon Yeah, well it would be great because we'd have more sausages

We can learn about tiny bowls of M&M's We could talk about the Red Vine per performer ratio Where that's at I wonder I've been curious about that i used to eat craft services sometimes like on my way home from something uh when i lived on the street where they were always shooting they don't really tell you not to eat it oh yeah you can just walk up and grab if yeah if you're if you're in an area where they're shooting a movie

i think you just walk around like you're a pa or something you can just grab a handful of pretzels i had a really intense craft services experience the other day. Me and Adam were, me and Adam Lissagore, aka Lonely Sandwich, past guest on the program, were out shooting Put This On and we were on the set of the film

oh gosh Bridesmaids which is this new film written by and starring Kristen Wiig. Michael yeah, Michael Hitchcock's in that as well. Exactly. Looks like it'll be a blast. No reason to doubt that it'll be a blast given the people involved. We were

interviewing Paul Feig, who was directing this thing. Oh, good for him. And they're shooting in a studio that's just for shooting airplane scenes. It's called, like, Flight Time or something like that. It's named Flight Time after the 80s R&B outfit.

What part of town is this in? It was far away. It was north of here. It was north of Los Angeles. Sure. It was in Valencia or something. I can see that being the place that that happens. Yeah. uh it was really the whole experience was kind of a trip but the intense craft services experience was the mayonnaise gun they announced that you're forced

to eat out of yeah they just say go go go go everybody on the set they're all on the same page with this i don't know uh they call it bros mayonnaiseing bros and then for that season with a gun yeah um but i think they could come up with a more elegant title so they're shooting a scene inside of this airplane and it's a real airplane uh they've only got about two-thirds of it or 60 of it but it is a real airplane just sitting in this sound stage in wherever we are, Valencia or something like that. But they're shooting inside the airplane, and I and most of the crew are outside the airplane because obviously that space in there is really tiny.

It's airplane-sized, just to give a metaphor for non-Hollywood people. Sure. And there's this... They had sort of pulled the time that we were visiting at the last minute and as you guys may know just i'm sure jordan knows i have to eat really regularly or i get migraines so i was super hungry they had just they had made it so that we had to come in when they started shooting which was like 11 30 a.m or something like that we had to sort of wait around for an hour and and then we interviewed Paul,

and we were getting B-roll and stuff. So it was well past lunchtime, but well before they were going to take lunch. Lunch on the movie set was like 4 or 5 p.m. But they had a bowl of granola and yogurt out and fruits. Now, I wanted this yogurt and granola and fruits so badly. So badly. But the thing was, somehow, I missed my window of it not being quiet on the set. So, like, there was a time at the beginning.

So, if you were scooping something into something else, like, it would be audible. That was what I, yes, that was my concern. Sure. But here's the thing they're inside the airplane so i don't really think that i would ruin anybody's sound or anybody's takes by scooping it however everyone else is being totally quiet so i would be the guy making noise just from scooping this granola so i'm like trying to like i'm like standing by the granola like waiting for an opening

where somebody is making some noise so I can scoop some fruit and yogurt into a cup with some granola yeah it was the most nerve-wracking you should have started a small fire you should have called me I'm great at diversions I'm gonna come over and knocked over a rack of clothes or something that's your that's your role in your old time west posse? Yeah. Diversions. You go into your saddlebag and pull out a pink wig and put it on.

Yoohoo! Boys! It was really intense. The other weird thing about going onto the set of the film Bridesmaids with a superstar actor, director or actor, writer, Kristen Wigg and celebrity director,

Paul Feig was, uh, we went on to Paul Feig's trailer and Paul Feig is, you probably know, you probably know Paul Feig from all these various freaks and geeks things you've done. One of the nicest guys ever. Just a super,

super, super nice guy. Um, and this was the first time i'd ever met him in real life he'd been on the sound of young america like three times but i had never it had been in the in the early days when we did most of that stuff by phone so uh i had never met him in real life he was really happy to meet me like this is the sweetest guy in the world it was so great we go on to his trailer and his trailer is onto into into we go into his trailer, and his trailer is... Onto? Into?

Into. We go into his trailer. I'm picturing you guys being on top of the trailer, like looking at some sort of panorama or something. We were shooting a Metallica... They were also shooting a Metallica music video, and the concept was that we were on top of a trailer, driving around the city, playing our hit metal song. Sure. But we went into his trailer,

and it was the most spectacular you guys play metallica in the video metallica isn't playing themselves it's you you and the idea is the idea the concept behind the video the pitch was each member of metallica is uh replaced by someone who's a marginal public figure in a field known for being relatively quiet. Oh, so it's kind of funny. Exactly. Like it's kind of a cheeky... Exactly.

So I was a public radio host. Paul Feig was a comic memoirist. Nice. He was not there as a Hollywood director, as a comic memoirist. But the inside of his trailer was the most spectacular... Which one were you?

I was the public radio... Oh, which one? Which one were you? That was the public radio. Oh, which one? Which Metallica guy? Oh, cool. Yeah. Hey, I'm a dick about copying albums or whatever. Sure. See, that's my impression.

That's how I got the gig. It's really good. It's uncanny. Initially. You should do that on our Talking GPS. Initially. Our famous drummer's download initially download pack initially they had offered that part to krista tippett from speaking of faith but um i got it because i had the you

know i had the acting chops that she didn't have hey if we do the famous drummer pack here's mine i'm neil pert why not stop at the 7-eleven hey this is Henley. Get a U-turn as soon as you can. Bet you didn't know I played drums. He just reminds people that he plays drums. I'm Animal from the Muppets band. I love that one. That's great. Pretty dead on. What are they called?

What's the Muppet band called? The Electric Bananateal. Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem Band. Okay, that's what it is. Good work. That's why he hosts the Electric Mayhem Band. Okay, that's what it is. Good work. That's why he hosts the Pop Your Culture podcast. I know about all sorts of fictional bands from popular entertainment. Actually, that's kind of true because I have a blog, which is the Riverbottom Nightmare

blog, which is named after the Riverbottom Nightmare Band from Emmett Ander's Jug Band Christmas. Another Muppet Band. Wow. So you just got pretty deep there. Is it all Muppet bands or is it other puppet-based music acts? Like can you name other fictional bands outside of the Jim Henson family? Gosh, you know, I probably could off the top, though.

No, not so much. Okay. Can we please talk about this? If you delve into the archives. Can we please talk about this trailer? Oh, yes. Sure. This trailer was.

Which you're in, not on. I was in this trailer it was like for one thing i could never imagine a more opulent trailer right it could not be more opulent except that it's still a trailer right so it was sort of like it was sort of like someone had taken a model home that was in poor taste, a new construction development model home, the kind with like a giant entranceway with a grand piano in it, and had put those things into a trailer.

Like it was brand new and clearly top of the line. But there was a fake plastic television hanging on the wall. I said it was a model home not an ikea okay um but no model homes have uh model homes have plastic stuff in them don't they oh they do i think i mean i thought they had real stuff i thought you'd put some real stuff i can remember like some house shopping when i was a kid noticing like i can pretending to pick up the plastic i can tell you what it had uh when i was interviewing paulig, he and I sat in overstuffed Barca loungers. Nice. But they were very

contemporary, relatively contemporary. They were what you might call Iowa contemporary Barca loungers. And also, there was a gas fireplace. Wow. There was a trailer with a fireplace. But it's such an odd thing.

Do you know what movie company is producing this? Universal. Okay. Universal Studios. They'll throw some money around. No, they're not afraid to spend the big bucks. Sure. But one of the producers had like an Airstream that had been sort of like fully restored.

So he's like, well, if I'm always going to be on movie sets, I should have a sweet and I'm super rich, I should have a sweet trailer. That is, I have to hand it to you, that is pretty sweet. That's pretty great. Especially because I think that they rent them to the film. The film pays them to have their own trailer. You see what I'm saying?

This trailer could not have been a more awkward, sad combination of opulent and horrible. The Barka loungers were mounted on some kind of omnidirectional spring mounts, so they would... Randomly throw you out of them? Yeah. Like an ejector seat, is what you're saying. Yeah, it had oil slicks. It had knives that came out of the wheels.

Are you sure it wasn't the Speed Racer car? You might have been inside the Speed Racer car. Or the Spy Hunter car from the video game in the 80s. Sure. Yeah, that's what it was. It was both of them. It was both of those things. Okay, well, Cole Stratton is here from the Pop My Culture podcast.

We'll be back in just a second. I'm Jordan Jessico. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. podcast. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse, go. It's Jordan, Jesse, go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. I'm Cole Stratton.

I'm on the web sometimes. Are you sure you want that to be your nickname? Because that will stick. That's pretty bad. Amateur sleuth to go with your boy detective. Okay. Great. All right.

Because I'm a man. I like it. But I'm still not professional with my sleuthing. Okay. It's still a hobby. Yeah. It's still. You're boyish also.

Yeah. I suppose so. You're a boyish quality. You're full of energy. You've got a lot of vim and vigor. Thanks. It's been a long time quality. You're full of energy. You've got a lot of vim and vigor. Thanks. It's been a long time since we've been in the studio. I feel like we missed, I missed, you were probably at Comic-Con, right?

Yeah, I just visited Comic-Con for a day. I thought I was going to work down there, but it turned out that I only had a day. What are the kinds of stuff you've been up to since I last saw you? Well, I worked in Chicago for a bit. Sure. Beautiful city, Chicago. Absolutely. One of the most beautiful cities.

It's very, yes, it's spectacular. Great. Great architecture, great public life. Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Too hot, too cold. Awful weather.

Just the worst. Just horrible weather in Chicago. Jesus Christ. It's amazing to me that people live there. Sure. Given that. Awful weather. Just the worst. Just horrible weather in Chicago. Jesus Christ. It's amazing to me that people live there, given that. But very beautiful. Yeah. If you, like, yeah.

I mean, it's the perfect city for a coffee table book. Yeah, absolutely. Anyways, but I thought, I recently picked up a new favorite Twitterer. Really? And I thought this would be a good time to talk about it. Cole, you're very active on Twitter. I'm pretty active on it, yeah. And Jesse, you, obviously, do the occasional tweet.

Try this on for size. I've got two accounts. What? Oh, my God. What's your other one? I've got a personal account and a Put This On account. So do I. Yeah. You've got a Put This On account?

I do. Seems weird because it's my project. Well, I mean, it's a fake account for Nell from the movie Nell. Sure. I tweet as her,

as Nell tweets. It's just a lot of Tay and the Wayne and things like that. Nothing wrong with that. That's fine. But I mean, we all have our

favorite Twitterers. I'm sure people, we always look forward to reading their tweets. Rob Hubel. Rob Hubel. Mostly rob hubel for me rob hubel's great rob delaney's pretty hilarious absolutely yeah uh i don't know have you guys heard of at spider-man 223 i'm not familiar with at spider-man 223 i know at JackA227. This is at Spider-Man223. And I recently became aware of at Spider-Man223 when I received this at reply.

And I had noticed after I read this at reply and had noticed he had at replied me several times before. But this was the one that kind of caught my eye. Okay. Go hump your dick, dick pussy backslash and then i'm like who is this guy so i go to his profile there's no picture um only the bird the the bird that you get before you upload a picture right uh he he's from new bedford and his uh New Bedford, Connecticut. I think so. Yeah. And his – about him line is, I'm 13 at my own house being cool. There are several misspelled words in that sentence.

Here's just kind of – and I looked into it. I just wanted to read some more of these. I just wanted to kind of give you a sense of what he's all about. Here's just kind of a best of. Sure. Get those b-balls out of your mouth. And then an hour later, no, six hours later, get those big balls out of your mouth. That's to no one.

Boob, boob, boob, boob, boob, boob, boob, boob. Okay. Hold on. boob boob boob boob boob boob boob boob uh okay hold on there's why did he give up so soon he has several characters left he could have fit in like seven or eight more boobs uh yeah i know right well you know don't don't what do you ask james joyce why he doesn't use punctuation Sanctuation. Going to bed. Going to school. Okay. This is at Chris Brown. Chris Brown, tell me the real story, you beating up Rihanna because you got HIV. Here's another one. At Chris Brown, did you really beat up Rihanna?

If you did, tell me the whole H-O-L-E story. So, okay. Here's this 13-year-old kid, and he's added me a few times with just similarly vulgar nonsense stuff like that. And I'm thinking, who is this kid and why is he – and he only adds me and Chris Brown. And Chris Brown, it's all stuff about beating up Rihanna and asking him if he has HIV. So I'm thinking, who is this kid? Why? What I like – here's a reason that I can respect this kid, that he's talking about HIV, the human immunodeficiency virus, rather than full-blown AIDS.

Sure. immunodeficiency virus rather than full-blown AIDS. Sure. I think that represents an understanding of human biology and pathology that is really admirable. Look, Spider-Man 223 has got it together. There's no other way to look at it. This kid's going places. Yeah.

Okay, so I'm wondering, like, my first instinct is Fuel TV. Right. Like, my first instinct is Fuel TV. Right. Like, this is a kid who watches Fuel TV and, you know, has just decided to... You're the star of Fuel TV. Sure. I'm one of its noteworthy personalities. Absolutely.

You and Chris Fairbanks. Yeah, me and Chris Fairbanks. But here's the people he's following, though. And I looked into... I thought about that. I'm like, okay, this is probably just a Fuel TV kid, right? Right. Here's who he's following, and he's not following the stable of Fuel TV people.

He's not following Tony Hawk and Ryan Sheckler and Andy Adams. That guy who punched you. That guy who punched me, Travis Pastrata. He's following Chris Brown, some sort of Justin Bieber fan site. Oh, thank God. Chris Hardwick, me me and mariah carey that's it that's it that's the whole list oh also t-pain wow so what the fuck like any do i reach out to him like do i try and start a dialogue with him? Like, where do I go from here? Or do I just, like, just observe it as I would a grazing elk?

I think you should reach out to him. I think you should build with him. Yeah? As you would say if you were a, like, 1998 rapper. You need to build. I think you follow Friday him. I think you get him a little legion of followers. Okay.

This kid's got something to say, and he deserves to have people listening, you know? Sure. A lot of people think that young people don't matter, or we shouldn't listen to their opinions, their thoughts, their ideas. I think this guy is proof that young people are really bringing something to the table. Exactly. Creativity in spelling. Yeah. A profound understanding of the basics of medicine and health.

I mean, you know, really standing up against domestic violence. Absolutely. Sure. Justin Bieber, fan site. Mm-hmm. And comic repetition, which is good. And, of course, part of an explanation for why our pal Chris Hardwick has 2 million Twitter followers. Sure. It's because he's got Spider Hardwick has 2 million Twitter followers. Sure.

It's because he's got Spider-Man 223 on his side. Exactly. Did you guys follow Josh Molina at all? No, I don't know Josh Molina. He was on the West Wing and Sports Night, a bunch of other stuff. Oh, is Jeremy from Sports Night? Yes, exactly. You should have said, do you follow Jeremy?

Jeremy from Sports Night. He got to fictionally bone Natalie. There you go. Oh, man alive. High five. Woo. He did this thing like a week or two back. Do you think they really boned?

I hope they did. God, me too. Let's ask him. If they didn't, it would really give the lie to a lot of my masturbation over the last 15 years. You do fantasy sports night masturbation? Do you do Felicity Huffman and William H. Macy because they were kind of like at odds in that show?

Do you like, oh, what if they just threw down? That's not a fantasy. They're married in real life. No, I know. But like as at odds in that show. They're like, oh, what if they just threw down? That's not a fantasy. They're married in real life. No, I know, but like as their characters from the show. No, I'm saying I've seen them have sex. Oh. Yeah, they're into that kind of shit. Sure, wow.

That's fantastic. So classy. Well, he did this thing a couple weeks ago where it was really silly. All it said was, clearly this is the worst person on Facebook, and it had a link. Yeah. And when you click on the link, it just takes you to the Facebook login page. But you know how sometimes you go there when somebody wants to see something,

you have to log in to see it? But all it is is simply the Facebook login page. So people would go there, log in, see their own profile, and think that Josh Molina singled them out as the worst person on Facebook. Even though it's just a generic thing. So he got all this hate tweets at him. All these people saying, fuck you, man. Didn't understand what was going on at all in the slightest.

So he would just retweet what they would write to him and put some pithy comment in the front. And it started this big war that went on for a couple hours. Sort of like, if I could draw a parallel here. Sure. It's sort of like the time he set up the computer to vote for Casey. Dan instead of Casey. Dan instead of Casey. In the Who's Cooler. I think he voted for Dan instead of Casey. Dan instead of Casey. In the Who's Cooler. I think he voted for Casey

instead of Dan. Okay. You might be right. Yeah, I believe he voted for Casey instead of Dan in the Who's Cooler online internet poll. You know,

between the hosts of Sports Night. The hosts of Sports Night, yeah. It was also like the time when he tried to break up with Natalie, but it didn't take. Yeah.

That's not really like that. Isn't Natalie hot? We're just reminiscing about one of our favorite shows from the past. Is Festus in here tonight? Because things are Festivus, I guess. Anyway, so your tip is try and engage Spider-Man 223. I think this is a great

idea. We make Spider-Man 223 a star. We've all got some collective internet clout. Yeah, look, I got thousands of followers. Sure. You got thousands of followers. You got a lot of fave stars. Yeah.

Can you cash in your fave stars? Well, I mean, I don't know. I'm still not... I won't talk too much about my feelings about fave star uh but no i have yet to kind of make it into the you know fave star skull and bones i'm still kind of hovering around i mean i get about 10 per tweet which is respectable but not anything people have stopped favoriting mine yeah no although i did get I did get a really good fave star. No, we're not just going to talk about fave stars. No, of course not.

I can. I have lots of feelings about it. You should know, out there in the audience, you should know, we, Jordan and I, and I can't speak for Cole, but Jordan and I judge our self-worth on the basis of how many people... How many star points internet weirdos give us

on fave stars. If you want us to feel good about ourselves Sure When we make a joke You should click on the star next to it On our tweeters Agreed Right, Cole?

Yeah, I'm on board with that Click on the star People don't know People don't know about the stars Favstar is a website that catalogs How many favorite points you get on Twitter Someone can favorite your post And Favstar tells you How many and whom favorited that post.

Do you ever look at Favstar and wish that Jeremy would write a computer program? To just star your tweets? Yeah. Now, how many Favstars do you need to get into the Favstar Dead Poets Society? Where do you need to be on that? I think you need to be pulling Delaney numbers for that.

Oh, man. Is Delaney a superstar of Favestar? He's up there. He's one of them. It helps to be Delaney. It helps if you're... Here's the things that gets lots of stars on Twitter, from what I can gather about Favestar.

Big eyes. Lady with big eyes. Yeah. Yes, if you're a lady with a cute avatar, it doesn't have to be suggestive. It can just be kind of indie rock cute. Yeah. Basically anything you say is automatically.

Or if you're like a cranky dad like making my wife won't give me blowjob jokes and like maybe I should leave the kids at the mall. Yeah. Anyway, those are two things that are like consistently popular on Twitter. Oh my God. Speaking of cranky dads making my wife won't give me blowjob jokes, yeah anyway those are two things that are like consistently popular on on twitter oh my god speaking of cranky dads making my wife won't give me blowjob jokes i think this this show isn't just

a show where we talk about a tweet that somebody made but scott simpson why shouldn't it be but our friend scott simpson made a tweet that was maybe my favorite tweet of anyone that has ever tweeted anything. Like, basically in my whole life. Scott Simpson is one of the stars of Fave Star. There's no doubt about that. If you're talking about Scott Simpson, Adam Lissagor, Merlin Mann, these are that are getting a hundred favorites no matter what it is um but this one was truly spectacular talk talk for a second while i while i pull it up here uh hey colin with the what's the what's your what's your star uh uh maximum at this point

like what's your i don't this is something you keep track of i'm assuming it is uh you know i haven't yet i do check to see like what gets retweeted and how many people retweet things. So if I do a decent joke, it'll get retweeted a dozen times or whatever. Okay, so you maybe value the retweets more than you do the stars. I can't believe we're talking about this. I've gotten a lot of retweets. My retweets have gone way up and my stars have gone way down. I think people don't know, forgot about the star thing.

Here's Scott Simpson's, okay? You think you understand Spanish, then your gardener refers to your penis as ella, and it's back to square one. Oh my God. Home run. I could never. Joe Randazzo of The Onion. Yeah. He did one of my all-time favorites.

This is like a year ago, but I still haven't started, which was, Yeah. He did one of my all-time favorites. This is from like a year ago, but I still haven't started, which was, if you see a very deep hole with the sign, free pizza inside, do not believe it. The pizza's only free with purchase of a soft drink. Oh, gosh. Well, I mean, I should probably do one.

What's this guy, Spider-Man 223? Yes. How many listeners? I mean, we have tens of thousands of listeners on Jordan, Jesse, bro. of them do you think probably tons we've got at least 10 000 listeners on twitter sure we're our new project is spider-man 2 at spider-man 2 2 3 it's the number two number two number three right yes that's yes that's spider-man 2 2 3 and uh yeah what's your what are you uh And, yeah. What's your favorite here?

You got it? Watching T.V. No, I mean, that's not it, but, you know. Well, we're having fun. I think the thing about giving Rihanna AIDS is probably my favorite one. I think we can make... What's a good goal? He's got six... Oh, he's got five followers now.

Okay. He's about to get six. I'm looking him up right now. Are you following him yet? No, I'm not officially following him, but it's, I mean,

it's time to pull the trigger. Okay. I go back to his page like twice a day to see if he's written anything new. Who's follower number six? This guy. Oh, nice. I think,

I think by the time I'm going on vacation, I'm going to be gone for two weeks. I think by the time I come back, vacation, I'm going to be gone for two weeks. I think by the time I come back, 1,000 followers. That's our goal. Okay. I think that's absolutely. Right. We can do that.

We can absolutely do that. Let's make a star. Spider-Man 223 is the star that we're making today. If you're on Twitter, twitter.com slash Spider-Man 223. Follow him. We're going to make this young man believe in himself. We are. Yes. We're going to encourage him to tweet more often. We're going to encourage him to bother Chris Brown around the clock. Sure.

And, yeah, just generally achieve his potential. Okay. Well, we'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jesse Go. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. It's Jordan Jesse Goh. I am Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Cole Stratton, amateur sleuth.

It's a pleasure. Now, here's how it works on Jordan Jesse Goh if you want to put in a sponsorship message. We're not against sponsorship messages. No. Lord knows we're happy to have them. Yes, I am actively trying to sell out. We just charge you $100 for a personal message, Jumbotron style, or $150 for a commercial message, commercial style.

We've got a very special personal message. It's from Dan. Dan is sending out some really wonderful greetings to his sister Jackie. His sister Jackie just moved to the great city of Chicago. She doesn't know people there. This is a whole new place for her. Her brother Dan wishes that he could be there to be her pal in this new city that she just moved to. Beautiful city, by the way.

The Windy City. Sure. The city with broad shoulders. Our nation's capital. Little Tokyo. Paris, France. Sure. Star of the Bible Belt.

Star of the Bible Belt. But Dan would like to send out some sweet moving wishes to his sister Jackie, who just moved, and, by the way, her boyfriend David. Just best wishes for their new life in Chicago. I presume they're fleeing some kind of... Plague. Or potentially, I was presuming criminal charges of some kind. Oh, okay. Or like they didn't want to get served with a subpoena. Yeah. Oh, so it's just not a swarm of locusts or something.

No, it's the locusts that are serving the subpoena. Oh, I see. They're great process servers because they just take out everything in their path. Sure. Crops, for instance. Anything organic. Crops will often get in the way of a subpoena. Yeah.

A corn crop. Anyway, that's our message to Jackie from Dan. All the best. If you want to sponsor a future episode of Jordan, Jesse, go. You can email us. In fact, you can email our new development director at MaximumFun.org. Teresa at MaximumFun.org is the email address to send it to, T-H-E-R-E-S-A. Or you can use the contact form on our website and just choose sponsorships.

It's basically as easy as sending us $100 and we put out your birthday or anniversary or small business announcement. Or what have you. By the way, I want to take this opportunity. We have just recently sent out all of our t-shirts for the pledge drive. So all these people who donated to support the show have received these t-shirts.

And we have just hired these people. And in order to hire people and send out t-shirts, what do you need? Well, you need printers. Now, I know what you're saying. I understand why you need printers for t-shirts. Why do you need? Well, you need printers. Now, I know what you're saying. I understand why you need printers for t-shirts. Why do you need printers to hire people?

It's because they're going to need business cards, gentlemen. So I would like to take this opportunity to thank the printers who have helped us with this. VG Kids, our old friends, former sponsors of Jordan, Jesse, Go! We're going to give them some underwriting on the sound of young America.

Printed all our T-shirts. Did a wonderful job. They're online at vgkids.com. So if you're a band or for any other reason you need merch, they make all kinds of merch, T-shirts and whatnot. I'm also very excited that we've gotten letterpress business cards from One Heart Press in San Francisco. This is the second time they've printed business cards for me. And when I give people my business card, which I do as a professional in an industry, people are, without exception, always say, wow, that's a beautiful business card. And the reason is because we had it printed letterpress, which is a very fancy process

that involves like the physical stamping of a plate into a thing. And it doesn't have the website on the back where you get free business cards. Exactly. where you get free business cards. Exactly. No, but the good folks at One Heart Press, we also had them print our wedding cards, our wedding announcements and invitations,

and they did such an amazing job. They were so spectacularly beautiful. And so if you have any reason to need something that's beautiful printed for you, be it wedding announcements or personal stationery or business cards. Yeah, a threat that you don't want traced back to your handwriting. One Heart Press in San Francisco is the folks that we've used. And you can talk to Chad there. He's their resident Sound of Young America, Jordan Jesse Go fan.

He's the nicest guy ever. I'm sure they'll give you a little price break. And the work that they do is so beautiful. Like it's really something to get something wonderful. That's where you'd go. So our thanks to VG Kids and One Heart Press for printing stuff up for us. And we'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jesse Go. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, Jesse, go. I am Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.

Jordan Morris, boy detective. Cole Stratton, notary public. So... You can't change it, mid-episode. Amateur sleuth. Okay, thank you. I like notary public better, though. Okay.

Well, I mean, if you want to... I just don't want you to think you have two nicknames. you i like notary public better though okay well i mean if you want to i just i just don't want you to think you have two nicknames are you a notary public i can put my stamp on shit yeah yeah i don't just mean can you pee on things you understand that right yeah yeah i'm with you um i don't think you are with me i'm pretty sure that you think that putting your pee on things, either you think that – Look, it works for dogs and wolves. Why can't it work for me? Why can't it work for –

Dogs and wolves. My concern is not so much, Jordan, that he thinks that – I think that rather than being inappropriate, my concern isn't that he's being inappropriate. It's that I think he thinks that's what a notary public does. Yeah. Pees on important documents. Look, sometimes people have important documents. Sure.

They get stage fright. They can't pee on them themselves. Yeah. They bring them to me. Yeah. And I publicly pee on them for them. Yeah. When I'm gone too long, my cat turns into a little notary public.

And she notarizes my laundry hamper. Listen, I feel like one of the most important themes here on Jordan, Jesse, Go! And, first of all, I'd like to thank everyone for sending me the pictures of the Z-donk, which is half donk, half zebra. So, yeah, granted, donks are an important theme on this program. And I appreciate your efforts on my behalf, everyone who sent me a picture of the Z-donk. But I think probably if there were one theme that comes up over and over again, it's a particular obsession that Jordan has. And I don't know if you know about this, Cole, but Jordan, maybe you could explain it. Sure, real quick.

I feel like we're putting this obsession on me, although I guess it is mainly on me. It makes me seem like a pervert. That's fine. Yeah, I think isn't that the whole premise? I hadn't thought about it like that. Number one, it is your obsession. Sure. I've enabled it, certainly.

Okay. Maybe I mistook enabling for mutual enthusiasm. I'm fine with it, but I wouldn't – yeah. Okay. I'm not going to shit on it. I'm yes-anding it. No, sure. Okay.

But I will pee on it. Yeah. And validate it. But it costs $15, which is the rate that was agreed to by the state of California. state of California. Oftentimes on this show we will discuss or maybe wonder out loud about the

secret sex party. This is something when you go to a renaissance fair or a comic convention and you see the adults dressed up or something, in my mind, there has to be a sexual element to this.

Right. Otherwise, why would you do it? Right. So I, the only thing I can, the only thing I can wrap my brain around is that these people are having secret sex parties. Right. That's why they're there. Sure.

Why else would they go? Why would you do anything? How else do you explain all the slave layers at Comic-Con? I can't think of no other explanation. Anyways, and we actually got a call on our voicemail line. A listener was on his way to a secret sex party with his wife and their roommate. And it was the roommate that got us. It had just been him and his wife.

We're like, all right. That would have been one thing. Now, he wanted to be clear to us when he called in or emailed in that this was a 100% secret sex party. It didn't have, like, a comic book theme, and it had no association to any Renaissance fairs. Okay. So I don't know if this is going to completely satisfy your craving, Jordan. We're on the right track, I think. Yeah, but I wanted to welcome onto the air here.

Do you mind if we use your first name? No, that's fine. Okay. We wanted to welcome Chris onto the show. Chris kindly agreed to come onto our telephone line here and talk a little bit about secret sex parties and why he would go with his wife and his roommate. Yeah.

Okay. Where to begin? I'm like a kid in a store. Just a generic store. Yeah. Like a candy store. Like a Rite Aid or a Walmart. Like what it was like there, yeah.

So, okay. I guess, yeah, maybe let's just start with why roommates. I mean, I guess I understand that certain married couples, this is something they would do. But how did you get your roommate involved? Well, my roommate actually, well, my girlfriend and I, we're not married yet. Okay. My girlfriend and I, we're not married yet. Okay. We've been together for seven years now,

and we've been actually swingers for the last four or five years of that, and our roommate is our current swing partner. Okay. So it's sort of a normal addition to our triplet. Now, is it at all like the movie Swingers? I actually didn't see the movie swingers that's funny it's a lot of people fucking people other than their partners yep it's exactly like a star making performance for vince vaughn yeah you guys remember that year i think 1997 where you could say people swing but they meant swing dance to like big bad voodoo daddy and yeah

i bet that was confusing for the swinger community probably was yeah um where you could say people swing, but they meant swing dance to like Big Bad Booter Daddy and Poppin' Daddies and all that stuff. I bet that was confusing for the swinger community. It probably was. Yeah. So, okay, so did this person move in with you guys for the purpose of being a sexual third, or did they move in just off Craigslist or something, and then you're like, hey, we've got an idea? Hey, get a load of this burger. She was sort of a third first and then moved in later, so she was a friend too.

Oh, okay. So we already knew each other. We had already been established as sort of an extra in the couple, you know. Okay. Of course, yeah. Yeah. But in addition to the three of you living together, you also go to things where there's more than three people? This was the first – You'll understand two people is still a little difficult for me to wrap my brain around. But so you do go to things where there are more than three people.

Yeah, sure. This would be one of those things. And how do you get the – like, how did you hear about it? Like, what process led you to get there? Well, there are actually a lot of online swinger communities, and it's sort of a, they don't tell you the place until you know, until you are accepted into the group and that whole thing. So I was part of the swinger community online and sort of got an invite that way.

Now, what's that process like? Like when you, like the screening process, like how are you involved and then how do they make sure you're not just some weirdo? Well, one of the big things is you can't be a single guy okay uh they don't allow any single guys in there because those are generally the weirdos and um so you have to have a woman with you if you're a guy which sort of weeds out the weirdos on its own the fact that a woman will go near you. Exactly. Technically, though, you're all weirdos. But what's this pre...

Speaking technically. What's this pre-participation like? Like this you proving that you're cool enough to get invited. I'm guessing that it's mostly memorizing poetry. Yeah. Firefly fan fiction. It was a lot of memorizing of poetry. But no, mostly it was just sort of email conversations to sort of asking questions about us

and making sure we weren't freaks or answering things really weird. But they can also turn us away at the door, too, I suppose, when we got there. Oh, wow. Is there like a bouncer or something? Do they have like a security dude presiding over things? But they can also turn us away at the door, too, I suppose, when we got there. Oh, wow. Is there, like, a bouncer or something? Do they have, like, a security dude presiding over things? No, but there were 150 people at that one, so it wouldn't be— What? Fuck!

Are you—what? Holy shit! This is like— Where do they hold—yeah! The Hard Rock Cafe? Is this an airplane hangar? It was actually— A high school gym?

It was a giant lodge in the middle of the woods. Wow! Oh, wow. Okay, what's—how far was the drive? It was actually It was a giant lodge in the middle of the woods Oh wow How far was the drive? It was probably 20 minutes From the city I'm pretty concerned that this event Was called Max Fun Con I wasn't informed

If it's anything like that I'll be at the next one And this picture is somebody Getting totally lost in the woods up there, knocking on the door for directions. I'm sorry. Can I use your telephone real quick? Sure, once it comes out of that vagina. Hey, yo.

Okay, so you get this. So you spend time emailing the organizers. Yep. What are you talking about? Are you talking about movies? Talking about your favorite flicks? Yeah, what goes into these emails? Favorite sports stars?

It's sort of personal information about the couple, or in our case, the triplet, just sort of asking how long we had been together, how comfortable we had been in the community and stuff, making sure that I guess that it wasn't our first time with other people and we were sort of comfortable with that sort of situation because you don't want to get there and be uncomfortable with other people having sex around you. Did it get explicit? Like, does it get explicit or is it just, is it as touchy-feely as all that?

No, that was pretty much it. It was pretty easy as long as you had a woman. Okay. So, like, they didn't ask about, like, sexual activities you wanted to do? No, no, nothing like that. You guys ever talk about F in the AP? What was that? F in the AP.

Oh, who's the freak now, Jesse? I'm so're depressed. You could teach these high steppers a thing or two. Yeah, yeah. By all means, describe this. You know what I like about this call? Everything. All elements of it.

I like the practicality of the whole operation. No, I mean, and that's what I'm wondering about mostly is logistics. Like, these are the things that I feel like I've, you know, seen things on the subject that don't, that are just touchy-feely and talk about emotions and, you know, usurping social norms. Like, great, I know, but how much furniture is there? Well, we had to actually go to an orientation as well right before the party. What does that happen? It was in a separate room in the lodge. That's a timeshare presentation.

Cole, this is a safety thing. If you don't know how to operate your parachute, you might end up. What's at the orientation? Oh, just sort of the rules of the club, and that if you don't follow the rules, they'll kick you out, things like that. What are some of the rules? You can't talk about sex club. Always got to wear...

Just a standard sort of no means no. There's no asking why, anything like that. No asking for phone numbers afterwards. Leave it at the sex. Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. So if, like, you see someone in public after the party, you can't go up to them and go,

hey, that sex was awesome, if they're with friends or something like that. Gentlemen are expected to wear a coat and tie. They'll provide one for you if you didn't bring one. There's a crest on it. You've got to figure out who's bringing soda, who's bringing Doritos. You've got to work all that out. Yeah, you've got to tip the caddies. So if you could describe the people at this, like was there a genre of person that you thought was overrepresented?

That was a thing. There wasn't. That was a thing. There wasn't. There were people between 24, which is where I am, to about 60. And, I mean, pretty evenly represented throughout the scale. And, you know, there were probably some 8 or 9s there, and there were some 2s or 3s. Not 8 or 9-year-olds.

Well, they had a daycare area. Okay, but they get screened out very early in the process. That's what they're all there for. That's why they talk about favorite flicks. Yeah, exactly. If you bring up something that's... Daddy Day Camp is your favorite flick. You're out.

So, okay. So you're in this orientation room, and they're explaining no means no and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then you go into the main room chamber? Yeah, there were probably six or seven different, they called them play rooms. Okay. Were they themed? Yes, they all were.

What were the themes? The best one was probably the orgy room. What? Isn't the whole thing an orgy? What are the other rooms? One of them is the sex room. One of them is the orgy room. It's the sex room. One of them is the orgy room. It's the naked room.

One of them is the penis and vagina room. There's one based on the Industrial Revolution. Yeah. That one's horrible. It's terrible. Super sooty. What separated the orgy room apart from the other rooms? Well, the orgy room was also sort of a voyeur room.

So it had four mattresses laid down in the middle of this giant room. And then a couple feet from the mattresses completely surrounding it were also couches to watch the people on the mattresses. Wow. How naked is everyone? Like, do you immediately just strip off all your clothes when you walk from the orientation room to one of the themed rooms? Some people do. Just, like, immediately? Yeah, yeah.

Some people are just immediately naked or in robes. Some people are fully dressed still. Is there a coat check? No, but there was some coat hangers. My concern

would be if you checked your clothes where you would put the ticket. Up your ass, Jesse. There were some cubbies to keep your clothes where you would put the ticket. Up your ass, Jesse. Obviously. There were some cubbies to keep your clothes while you were there. But no, quite a few people, especially in the pool area. Is there staff that's not fucking? Is there cater waiters, I guess?

And like security people? Is there someone serving drinks? Well, there was no alcohol there because i guess they got in trouble with the alcohol board a few years back and why wouldn't they sure yeah they didn't have a license they had they are they got a license from the giant group of people fucking bored they forgot they forgot the the liquor board okay that's what the liquor board spends most of their time busting is like underage drinking and like big sex party drinking right that's where all their staff is going exactly so you've got no sanctioned alcohol drinking but are

do people have like booze and drugs that they're you know sharing kind of on the down low i saw some people sharing liquor but uh i didn't see any drug use at all now that'll uh that'll get you kicked out pretty quick okay are there so are there like roving like spotters yeah yeah they're base coaches yeah they're probably um i don't know they're probably six or seven maybe up to 10 staff members that were walking around in case anyone had issues or refilling the condom bowls and things like that um okay so you're so okay so you're in so you go from the orientation to the other room there's spotters walking around making sure everybody's okay how do you initiate like when is okay how do you initiate having sex with someone

like is there a pleasant conversation first do you do you talk about, you know, daddy daycare? Have you seen Inception? Do you think it was all a dream? Or is it just like, you know, when do we start sex? Like, talk about the interim. Well, yeah, it was a little weird at first because I didn't know how to interact with the people. So my girlfriend and I just sort of went into the pool and started swimming while my roommate... Like laps? Like swimming laps? They had kickboards, Jordan. Okay. And my roommate just sort of immediately got approached by two or three people because she didn't have a guy immediately with her. And so she was sort of looked like a single female. And they just started chatting her up about, yeah, movies and stuff. And so we sort of joined the conversation with them.

About movies? Yeah, about movies. And now what's the segue? Was anybody's dick out at this point? Yeah, how many dicks could you see while you guys were talking about, you know, Jonah Hex or whatever? We all had our clothes on for that, but the segue was pretty abrupt. It was one of the guys from one of the couples that we had been talking with. We were all in a group.

Just asked my roommate, hey, want to go into the orgy room? And they just went. Yep. So, okay. Let me ask you this. This is a question I went, and this is going to get a little bit explicit. Just so you know, if you have any kids listening out there, you should probably turn up. It's all been fine up until here.

That means you, Spider-Man 223. No, he knows what's up. He's mature for his age. He knows where HIV comes from. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. For his age. He knows where HIV comes from. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop.

Okay, so a gentleman's balls contain only so many jisms. This was exactly what I was going to ask. So, like, let's say, I mean, if you, I guess the question is, do you have to, like, put off having sex at the secret sex party? Because you're going to be like, well, I'm going to have sex once, and then everything after that is going to be a hassle. Yeah, as a gentleman, do you conserve? Do you, like, do you pace yourself? In what way do you make sure you're getting maximum enjoyment out of this? Well, personally, I sort of held off until the end of the night. I sort of kept it slow and focused more on the woman than myself for it. So I was able to slow down that way. But I saw some guys just going full bore,

I mean, for hours. It was insane. So these are the people who are experienced secret sex party goers and have attained this weird stamina? Is that something you observed? Well, there was one guy in particular there who had his own baggie filled with special condoms and lube that he brought, because apparently he didn't want to use the house stuff. He didn't want, if in terms of bowling, he didn't want to use the alley ball. Exactly. Okay.

Okay, so there's clearly people there who know the drill and who kind of train for this sort of thing, maybe? I guess, yeah. I mean, you see people start to weed out as the night goes on, too, so for this sort of thing, maybe? I guess, yeah. I mean, you see people start to weed out as the night goes on, too, so you can sort of see who gets spent early and who waits. Let me ask you, first of all,

congratulations on waiting. Thank you. It's more special that way. Yeah. Okay, so is it pleasant? Okay, so is it pleasant? There's no doubt that this is going to be exciting, whether it's exciting because it's good or exciting because it's terrifying or whatever.

This is exciting. I mean, I don't think there would be any way to be bored by this. But is it a nice time? It was, actually. The people were really nice, and after the sex, it wasn't awkward at all, I guess. I don't know how to explain it, but we just sort of talked after, too. It was catered to, so the food was good. What are we talking here?

Let's talk food. Pigs in a blanket? Well, they had a crazy sandwich. I think it was roast chicken that night, and then at midnight they bring out sandwiches and cookies that they bake there. Wow. I would think you'd want to do, like, theme snacks that tie in with the night.

You know, like dicks in a blanket. Something like that. Oh, sure. Vagina pie. Yeah, exactly. F in the AP punch. Wow. This is fascinating.

It is. Endlessly fascinating. What do you – now, obviously something you deal with. I mean you're a guy who's in a relationship. Do you have any like policy or any kind of technique for curbing jealousy that might come up with this sort of arrangement? Well, I guess I sort of got over that in the first year or so of swinging in general. It was weird at first, but I've always found it sort of exciting. The thought of it is sort of exciting, too.

So I guess that's kind of a weird thing, and it helps out a lot. Like the thought of my woman with another man. Okay. Specifically his boner. Yeah, yeah. The man's boner. Yeah. Jordan, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to cut you off. That's okay. How many races were represented in this thing? I had to say something a 12-year-old would say. That's okay. But seriously, this is like a white person thing, right? Yeah, yeah. There were, oh God, I think three black guys and the rest were all white. Hmm. So it's 147 to 3.

Seattle's pretty white as well, so it was a pretty solid representation of Seattle's demographics. Sure. So you think maybe, but if we did this in a more diverse area, like Chicago that we were talking about earlier, you think there might be a different skew? Oh, yeah, I guarantee you. Okay. Certainly, I like how you're doing some sort of... It's people from all walks of life.

It was, I mean, there were pretty well-off people, and there were some less than well-off people, too. Some clearly homeless people. I hope you're taking all this down, Jordan, for your sex party almanac you've been working on. Yes, I know. Sex parties in America. The almanac. Okay, how does everybody clean up?

Yeah, when do you leave? You don't sleep there, do you? Some people do. They actually, at night, you can just sort of sleep on the mattresses. Gross. Why would you do that? Well, they change the sheets throughout the night. That's one of the spotters' jobs.

Chris, I don't mean to be rude, but that's not going to cut it. Yeah, that's still too gross. It's not a sheet issue. It comes through the sheets. Sure. That would be like a terrible summer job. I'm a part-time sheet burner. Yeah, do you get the impression

that the spotters, do they work for the company? Are they just employees or are they sex party enthusiasts that just want to be there? It's actually just regular members of the club. If you work as the staff for a party, you get a free party or something like that, because

there is an entrance fee. Okay, what's one of these run? What are we talking about? What are we talking? It was $45 for a couple. That seems pretty reasonable. I was going to say, oh, that's $500 a person. Oh, no.

$45 seems very reasonable. It's $15 for single females, too. That's what you're dropping on a trip to Knott's Berry Farm. Yeah. Hard to fuck there. So, really, this is the better value. If you had 150 people fucking, though, what could they do? They're not going to shut down Knott's Berry Farm.

Quite frankly, Knott's Berry Farm would be happy to have the business. They're not selling as much boysenberry jam as they used to. Wow. Well, this has been great. I feel informed. Well, Chris, we really appreciate you taking the time to inform us. I have one last question. Yes.

Sure. Chris, you've already said out loud what city that you live in, and you've said your first name, and also you live in a house with a person who's sort of in your relationship, a third person who's sort of in your relationship. Are you concerned about how this might affect your life outside of fuckfests? No. All my friends know of our relationship. What about your, like, colleagues?

Do you have a, do, are you in business? I am I don't think any of them listen to Jordan, Jesse, go No, no, no preschool teachers listen to Jordan, Jesse, go Okay Look, he's the only guy on the whole Supreme Court It's been a pleasure talking with you, Mr. Souter He still on the Supreme Court? Yeah, sure, I think so

Souter? Isn't he? Cole? I don't know You only know about Muppet bands Pretty much Well, Chris, thank you so much for taking this time. It was a really informative and fascinating talk we did.

Me say thing. If you wanted to comment at all, Jordan, we can actually get you an invite if you'd like, if you're in the Seattle area, if you ever wanted to see it yourself. Specifically Jordan, by the way. Not you and me, Cole. We're not invited. Jordan might be making that noise, but he is nodding his head enthusiastically. I am now Googling Seattle plane tickets.

Jordan's boner is touching the ceiling of this room right now. To be fair, he's three inches from the ceiling. Yeah. Well, yeah, thank you for speaking candidly. I think that's all any of us wanted in the realm of the secret sex party. Yeah. Thank you so much, Chris. Well, we'll talk to you next time we need to talk to somebody who goes to a lot of secret sex parties.

No problem at all. Later, Chris. Okay. Wow. So there's that We'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jesse Go Love you Love you

Love you Love you Love you Love you Love you Love you Love you Love you

Love you It love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, curl up in the corner and giggle or cry in my case yeah yeah man it was really hard to console you it was just an emotional roller coaster the whole time you thought he was he covers up for his emotional roller coaster with dry wit but shit was going on for him before we get completely out of the juvenile juvenile category can i tell you about something that happened to me in Calgary? Yes. So I had two weird – Calgary is a beautiful town. Sure. And the folks at the Calgary Folk Festival were very kind to invite me

to do The Sound of Young America and give a talk there. We had a blast, met some cool people, saw a great Avett Brothers show, just a fantastic show, really a lot of fun. And it was just a great experience overall But we were walking around Calgary's cool neighborhood Yes Which is Calgary Heights Yeah, Calgary Heights

Not much to see in Calgary I think Calgary was sort of a small oil town That grew in population a lot With the boom of the oil economy I think people who work in the oil industry may be not known for their cool boutiques. Right. Plus, it's not hockey season right now, so you can't even go to a Flames game. Although you can go to the biggest restaurant in town, Flames Central.

Ooh, nice. I think it's called Flames Central. Flames Square. Flames something or other. Sure. It's like a 30s movie theater converted into a huge Calgary Flames themed restaurant and club. Nothing wrong with that. But, you know, we had a lot of great experiences.

We got to see the man whose job it is to bring groupies to Michael Franti. Then we got to see Michael Franti sitting with a circle of groupies all in bare feet. sitting with a circle of groupies all in bare feet. And then we got to see a security person dragging off the one man who had managed to sneak his way backstage to talk to Michael Franti in front of these six or seven lady groupies that were sitting in the circle with him. And as the man was being physically dragged away from this circle, he was thanking Michael Franti. Oh, Franti he was thanking Michael Franti. Oh, Franti.

Oh, Michael Franti. But in this nice neighborhood in Calgary, I saw something that was really special, something truly spectacular. It was a store that sold two things. It was a dual-purpose storefront. Sold two primary products, advertised very large in the window.

One of them was lingerie. So it had lingerie in the window, you know, your teddies, your matching bra and panty sets. Sure, these are examples of lingerie. It had a variety of lingerie in the window and advertised that it sold lingerie. And the other thing that it sold was cat fancier gifts.

Finally, I can get my one-stop shopping done. Who are these people who would name the person? I think it's for opposite ends of the spectrum. It's for people who have a lot of sex and people who have no sex it's one of the two it was sincerely the strangest story i've ever seen in my entire life it continues to boggle my mind to this moment i i think it's for cat fuckers i'm gonna be honest with you i mean i'm not saying for certain it's for catfuckers. Calgary was a relatively conservative town, certainly, but it's probably for catfuckers.

Sure. Okay, I want to thank Cole Stratton for being here with us. Aw, shucks. Thanks, guys. Thanks for having me. You can listen to his hit, his smash hit podcast, Pop My Culture, which is what, online at popmyculture.com? Popmyculturepodcast.com. Popmyculturepodcast.com.

And it's on the iTunes. A very amusing program, one of the few podcasts in the world with a lady involved in it. That's right. Vanessa Raglin, my co-host. The very funny Vanessa Raglin has had many celebrity guests on the program. What are some of your celebrity guests? Matthew Lillard. Matthew Lillard.

That's a major star. Her co-star Linda Cardellini. Linda Cardellini from Freaks and Geeks. Sam Levine also from Freaks and Geeks. Michael Hitchcock. A couple of the guys from Rift Rocks and Mystery Science Theater. So these are heavy hitters. Yeah.

Paula Tompkins, Chris Hardwick. Yeah. Not the usual folks. All on the Pop My Culture podcast at popmyculturepodcast.com. Our theme music, Love You, by The Free Design, courtesy of Light in the Attic Records. It's on Kites Are Fun, the best of The Free Design. And hey, guess what?

The Sound of Young America live DVD should be, if you were a donor in our last pledge drive, should have already arrived. If not, it will probably arrive shortly or you have the wrong address on PayPal, which is a big problem. But we've sent out these DVDs. A lot of people have been asking me. They said, you know, like I was already a donor. I didn't get one or I want one to give to somebody or how can I get one? So we finally put them in the MaxFunStore.

So you can buy them online at MaxFunStore.com. They're only $18 and they feature not only the Sound of Young America live show from WNYC in New York with Scott Adsit from 30 Rock and the music video director Rick Cordero and music from Andrew WK and Nellie Mackay and comedy from Kumail Nanjiani and an introduction by Jordan Morris. Um, but also, uh, uh, hours of bonus footage,

including, um, uh, interviews with, uh, David Gordon green and, um, Kevin Klein,

uh, and others and a very special short film, uh, made by Jordan and myself, uh, just for the digital versatile desk. Yeah, it's an Easter egg.

Yeah, exactly. I think you can also watch all of the animations that we made for Jordan Jesse Game if you can't beat Jordan Jesse Game. Oh, speaking of Dan Heinrich, the man who made Jordan Jesse Game, I visited with him in Chicago.

That's a good reason to go to Chicago. That's fantastic. A sweet guy, if ever there was one. Absolutely. That features John Hodgman Guy, if ever there was one. Absolutely. That features John Hodgman and Andy Daly, our good pals. So maxfundstore.com, you can buy that and all your other Jordan Jesse Go stuff. And please do, because that's how Jordan gets his check at the end of every couple of months. Cha-ching.

Cha-ching. Got all kinds of great stuff. Anyway, I think that's about it. Jordan, are you going to come in here and host a show without me? I was going to say it Off mic, but yes I am definitely into Hosting another

Kids only episode Of the podcast So yeah, look for that maybe Okay, in a week or so For Jordan Morris Cole Stratton from the Pop My Culture podcast. We'll talk to you next week on Jordan, Jessica.