Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 343: Clearing the Pipes with Eliza Skinner and Jesse Joyce

Episode Date: September 22, 2014

Comedians Eliza Skinner and Jesse Joyce join Jordan for a discussion of hipster stores, the new Liam Neeson movie, and Disney theme parks.

Give a little time for the child within you. Don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you. It's Jordan Jesse Go. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. Jesse Thorne out sick today. So as I like to do when Jesse is out, I want to just treat you guys to a little piece of one of my one-man shows. just treat you guys to a little piece of one of my one-man shows. This, of course, is called The Duchess of Shandy House. It's my one-man show where I am a child pickpocket in Charles Dickinson's England. The streets of Sussex were musical this time of year.

The fishmongers were selling their wares. Fresh haddock plucked right from the Thames, they yelled. You know what? I'm just kidding. I'm not going to do that. We're just going to have a traditional Jordan, Jesse, go gab fest. I have two very able, willing guests slash co-hosts with me today. The first, a favorite of this program, a stand-up comedian, a writer for the Funny or Die comedy website, Miss Eliza Skinner.

Hi, Eliza. Hi. How are you? Good. Thanks. For the folks at home, Eliza really sold it with some jazz hands. Yeah, that's kind of a go-to for me. I'm super excited to be here.

Clearly. Spending some quality time with you. I should let everyone know she's still doing the jazz hands. It's constant. Please don't stop. The other, Mike, a newcomer to this program, a stand-up comic, someone you might know as a regular beloved guest on the Keith and the Girl podcast, a writer for things like

Comedy Central roasts of various celebrities, the Oscars, and one of my co-workers on At Midnight, Mr. Jesse Joyce Hi Jesse! What's up man? How are you? Oh I'm doing fine. Good, sweet You'll be doing no dancing I suspect None whatsoever, I refuse I won't, I don't dance

I think anybody who is a fan of 19th century literature will appreciate that you called him Charles Dickinson. I wanted to say Dickensian. Right. Yeah. Yeah. But then I fucked it up. Hey, come on.

I made up a fake one man show on the spot. Angie Dickinson's grandfather. Yeah. Charles Dickinson. Charles Dickinson. Who coincidentally also wrote a lot of urchin-ass sort of pickpocket dramas. I just love that you didn't bother doing any sort of

accent. Yeah, I mean I was trying to. Oh, okay. So, you know, let's just take that from the top. I'll do that fake one-man show thing again that was kind of funny but not really. It really is, but you know what, that did. It sounded like the tone of old Chuck Dickinson. It really is. But you know what? That did. It sounded like the tone of old Chuck Dickinson.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Great. Let's start. Let's start here. I was driving down Western today. Eliza, maybe a street you're familiar with.

I do know Western. Jesse, are you familiar with Western? I know it's a street here. OK. I actively won't. My brain won't let me retain Los Angeles geography. Yeah. As a tried and true New Yorker. Yeah. As an embittered guy who's stuck out here.

Your brain just won't let you learn things like you're going to want to take Hauser around 3 o'clock. Yeah, I don't know. Things like that. I don't even know. Fountain's great. Right. All these. OK.

So Western is Western is a street and it's kind of like it's kind of outside Silver Lake, which is the hipster district. Sure. Sure. Jesse, you'd know it as Little Brooklyn. The belly of the beast, I call it. Yeah, right. Los Angeles part of Los Angeles. Sure.

I couldn't hate it more. Although I might say the Sunset Strip is the Los Angeles part of Los Angeles. Well, it depends on which Los Angeles you're looking for. That's true. We could quibble over semantics all day. There's a Venn diagram where I hate all the people in the middle in either place. Sure. Yeah.

Anyway, sorry. Go ahead. There's one Russian guy with a shoe repair store in Burbank you're kind of into. I'm totally OK with that guy. Yeah, that guy is the greatest. So Western is kind of like it's on the outside of Silver Lake but the Silver Lake gentrification monster is slowly starting to creep over and unfurl its tentacles over Western-ish. And, you know, unfurl its tentacles over Western-ish. And it used to be a place where, you know, you would go to rent a bounce house for your Mexican birthday party or buy a lot of phone cards because you need to call Guatemala a lot.

And it also had like the smog cutter, which is like the Bukowski bar, which is kind of a dumb thing to be, but it's something, you know. And I just noticed that the hip coffee bar has opened on Western and two things opened up next to it, which is maybe the most hilarious pairing of two store names I think I've ever seen. Next to the hip coffee bar is a place called Flounce Vintage. Oh, no. Flounce Vintage, a store no. Flounce Vintage. A store that I do not know what they sell. And it is called Twig and Twine. So right next to each other.

I really hope it's just Twig and Twine. Oh, God, I hope so. For all of your mise-en-scene needs. I hope so, too, because that shit's very flammable. I feel like it's a real hipster decorating thing to just have areas of displays. Like, here's our bits of spools. Right. I think, yeah, hipster decorating and redneck killer who's leaving clues for the cops because he's playing a game of cat and mouse with them.

Very similar. These twig dolls are adorable. Oh, there's a human thumb in the middle. Oh, fuck. He's toying with us. Yeah, like the baby doll parts and shit like that. Like, yeah, you see that a lot. And buttons.

Butts and buttons. Oh, and a little thermos. A taxidermed bird. What does it mean? But he's wearing a top hat. Taxidermy really does hit the sweet spots of the worst people. Oh, I think you, I mean, you might be sitting next to celebrity taxidermy enthusiast Jesse Joyce.

Really? Jesse Joyce, can you argue in favor of taxidermy? And you're in the studio of taxidermy enthusiast Jesse Thorne. So you've wandered into a minefield. He's a taxidermy yeah well it's and you're in the studio of taxidermy enthusiast jesse thorn so you've wandered into a minefield enthusiast as well i think i don't know if he's still into taxidermy he had i think he has some taxidermy in the house all right i just think it's neat shit i don't know why it's just like i gotta i have in my you know my office in new york i have uh uh an african sesame that was killed in the 20s. I don't even – what's a sesame? Is that like a dick dick?

It's like the largest – yeah, it's the largest of the African antelopes. So it's kind of like – you know how like shit evolves on a continent when it's sort of like unmolested by other – you know, like how a – kangaroos are deer basically. Sure. If you put a deer on an island for a million years – It'll get weird and fucked up. That's the weird bullshit that happens. it lays eggs and whatever the fuck you know like so uh yeah the uh the sesame is the moose of africa essentially okay is it still in pretty good shape oh yeah yeah the taxidermy itself yeah yeah it's great i got it on ebay for like

do you have to like do you have to like oil it or anything i don't like no all right you're missing the i'm not like actually like an enthusiast well i ask because I've seen a lot of taxidermy in really disturbing shape. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I don't get the gross shit that's like – this is just a rotting head. No, I have a wild boar. I have a two-headed parakeet. I got some bizarre shit. It's cool.

But you don't add – and I think, Eliza, maybe this is what you were getting at. I think when it gets into dodgy territory is when you're adding bifocals and bow ties. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's dumb shit. Making their deaths all the more undignified. My entire office is set up like a 19th century, like, fucking, you know, like some sort of pipe smoking fucking. Like an explorer's club. A gentleman's club in the true sense of

the word exactly right yeah it's like leather chairs and shit and i whatever okay i just smoke cigarettes in there so it's taxidermy taxidermied animals that smell amazing yeah that's what you're saying okay well i got divorced two years ago and that's where this all came from oh so you've got a family yeah i'm gonna put that there there. Because she was preventing you from collecting taxidermy in leather chairs? Yeah. Not in my house. Yeah. We're going to put up these framed posters for Italian liqueurs that I got at Ikea.

My college town had a natural history museum on the campus that no one had ever noticed or gone in. It may have been a ghost house. And one day I was like, yeah, it was just like this house with that sign out front. And one day I was like, you know, why don't we, why don't any of us go in there? We should go in there. And so I walked in and it was mostly like one person's collection of beetles, fetuses and jars. And then the second floor was just taxidermied animals that most of the eyes had fallen out of.

So they had just kind of, like there's, I guess. They had put googly eyes on them. They had put in cotton balls with black marker dots on them. So it was like weird, pointed in different direction, cotton eyeballs. So that left a scar. Yeah, I can see. The fetuses were human?

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that was bad too. Okay, yeah. Yeah, that was bad too. fetuses were human? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that was bad, too. Okay, yeah. Yeah, that was bad, too. The cotton ball eyes. That's where you draw the line. It really was, yeah. And like, oh, yeah, a lot of cracking skins.

They just collected those around campus after frat parties. Yeah. I guess we should just jar them up. Yeah. So back to flounce vintage and twig and twine. Oh, yes. I was trying to think to myself, I was playing a little game. What's the next fucking thing that's going to move on to this block?

And I was having kind of a hard time coming up with things. The only thing that I thought of that even remotely worked was a store called Yarn Jizz. That's a store where either you something jizzes yarn or you jizz on yarn. I was thinking bits of wool and poetry. Oh, I like that. But I mean, that's pretty much the same thing. I kind of wanted to source this to the room. Do we have any ideas for this strip?

Teeny tiny hats? Oh, yeah. Maybe it could be called Lil Hats. Oh, I like that. Yeah. I think it's just like kindling that's picked up, but it costs $500. With like a ribbon around it? Like a fag of wood.

Sure. You know? Yeah. A little terminology. Right? It's just a sort of- A bundle. Yeah.

It's wrapped in some sort of twine. Oh, yeah. So maybe- But it's going to cost you- Like, you could just go out to the woods and pick it off the ground yourself, but rather than that- It has been wrapped up by a- You're paying $500 to $700.

It has been wrapped up by a man with expensive suspenders. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah, maybe that's even, I mean, that's a great business idea. I mean, we could just kind of drive out to, you know, I don't know what the call is. Well, you don't want to go too far.

You still want to be locally sourced. Oh, yeah. No, it's got to be local. Got to be local. So maybe we can even just go into Griffith Park and, you know, or we can find one of those old men on the side of the road that's advertising free firewood. Got to be local. So maybe we can even just go into Griffith Park and, you know, or we can find one of those old men on the side of the road that's advertising free firewood.

Get it from him. Bundle it up ourselves. With like a photo of him, maybe steepier toned. Oh, yeah, sure. Just to show how authentic the whole thing is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe involve urban youth somehow. Oh, I like that.

How about espresso mugs full of the dirt of the grave sites of assholes? Like what people, hipsters, give a shit about. Oh, like Elliot Smith. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, sure. Like an espresso mug filled with the dirt from their plot. Oh, I like that. Friends of presidents.

Just photos of friends. The president's friends. Yeah, like here's a John C. Calhoun. That's Scallywag. Here's who Woodrow Wilson played croquet with. Exactly. Oh, I like that. Thank you.

Historical. Are you willing to invest? I'm kickstartering it. Oh, you know. What are my perks if I kickstart this? You get an espresso mug full of dirt from Elliot Smith's grave. Yeah. And a whispered

poem. Terrific. I'll somebody app a whispered poem to you. Is that 500 bucks? Okay, so yeah, we have a store where you jizz on yarn. I misinterpreted that entirely. I thought it was like pre-jizzed on yarn. Like you go in and you beat off

onto a ball of twine. Oh, and then that's what you sell that's what i'm asking you you know two businesses two businesses in one pitch yeah it's two okay yeah it's both it's it's jizzed on yarn and you can either go in and jizz on the yarn or like those are the donors sure you can come in and buy jizzed on yarn there you go and yeah and we can i mean obviously you can't pick dead hipster celebrities, but we could probably go and get, you know, I'm trying to think who's the guy from Modest Mouse. Is it a mouse? Yeah, it's a mouse.

Yeah. So, you know, him. And yeah, I mean, we can. It's an actual mouse. Sure. We can get some celebrity kids out there. He doesn't like to talk about it too much, though. He's pretty modest.

We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse, go. Mark your calendars for a brand new thing. The first ever Max Fun Week is coming up October 15th through 21st. MaxFunWeek is all about celebrating the creativity and passion of our listeners. We'll have podcast crossovers, Q&As, behind the scenes tours, giveaways, and more. No fundraising, just awesome stuff for you. So tune into your favorite MaxFun shows, tell a friend about MaxFun, and check out some new shows during MaxFun Week, October 15th through 21st. It's Jordan, Jesse, go. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you.

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Love you. Love you. Love you. You know me well enough. You can come up with my own. I'd be curious to hear what that was like. So I'd like to take a minute to maybe talk about some recent movies that we've seen. I was very excited to see the new Liam Neeson film, A Walk Among the Tombstones. A, if you were trying to think of a joke name for a late period Liam Neeson movie, you could not think of one better than that. It's hilarious. The trailers have all the trappings of a late period Liam Neeson movie. He's taunting someone over the phone. It looks like some Chechen men are getting punched in the throat. Is it actually related to Taken at all? Well, here's the thing is that it is so

similar to Taken in a lot of ways. He's also playing a grizzled American cop and he has that weird I'm a European trying to do an American voice. It's like, yeah, that's me. I'm Dave. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. Dave Smith, American from the Bronx, born and raised. I feel like there was a we had a better one this summer. Christopher Eccleston was on The Leftovers.

Did either of you watch that? A few episodes. Anyway, he was doing he on The Leftovers. Did either of you watch that? A few episodes. Anyway, he was doing the greatest. Yes, that's right. From America. That's me. They always end up sounding like a morning radio DJ kind of.

They're chewing their words. Oh, boy. Yes, that's right. Arr, arr, arr, arr. Time to go to the baseball match because I'm an American. The fifth caller will bring my daughter back. But Liam Neeson blows him out of the water with the weirdest European-American voice. It has to do with abducted women.

Sure. There is some light throat punching but this manages to be the creepiest weirdest like most tonally bothersome movie i've seen in a long time and it's weird because it is so similar to taken but the ickiness is just dialed up to 10 like when liam neeson's daughter is being kidnapped in taken you know that she's just something bad. You don't want her to be taken. Gee, that's a bad thing. But this, it describes the awful – spoilers for A Walk Among the Tombstones, by the way. And I don't want this to turn into a Tumblr post, but this movie punches the throat of the Bechdel test like Liam Neeson punches the throats of Chechnyans.

I think the only two – I counted two women in the movie who were not abducted and brutalized. One was a waitress who asked a child if he wanted a soda and then left the movie. And the other was in a coma. Because she'd already been brutalized? I don't know. Maybe it was the result of a previous brutalizing. So it was not so much in the world of Taken as it was in the world of Planet of the Apes? Yeah, I didn't see Planet of the Apes.

Is there some brutality in that? There's just like no female characters. There's one that's like a doctor and I don't think she has a name. And the other one is a dying monkey played by Judy Greer who is dying the whole time. Sure. And doesn't – I'm like – You know, actually, that doctor, I do remember something that in the Blu-ray you do learn the name of that doctor. Oh, wow.

It's Dr. Juggs. Now I want to go back and see it again. Yeah. But that was the most recent one that I was like, wow. I mean, the casting office for this must have been just so many push-ups yeah and sports drinks i don't know what do guys like no push-ups sports drinks oh you got it that's basically it um so yeah so that would be about movies about renegade apes without a bullshit love story that's what we like there could be women there without them

being in love with somebody their day would would ruin it. Okay, cool. They would give off pheromones that would upset the apes. Listen, there's very few women roles in post-apocalyptic things. You know what I mean? I just feel like it's like, leave that to the dudes to handle shit in the apocalypse. Thank you.

Thank you. Finally. I don't really know who Margaret Atwood is. I have no idea who that is either. I'm just applauding so i come off well there are like like 20 to 25 people listening to this going like yeah exactly margaret atwood and they're probably my friends i don't listen to this no no you know you know your audience that's right so it was weird that like this is basically a movie that i love the taken movies like it's almost the movies plural you evenies plural? You even like Taken 2?

I kind of do. Yeah. I really enjoyed the first Taken. Yeah. And then it was just fucking silliness. I'll admit the Taken 2 is significantly worse. Yeah. But I don't know.

I like that movie. I like that part where he's having his daughter set off grenades so he can hear how far away he is. Oh, right, right, right. Anyway, that's the only thing I remember and I enjoyed that. Right. hear how far away he is. Anyway, that's the only thing I remember and I enjoyed that. Right. But yeah, maybe it's just a sense of like, at least you

get to spend time with his obnoxious daughter and learn about her dream of becoming a singer before she gets abducted. So that you care whether or not she gets abducted. Sure, yeah. Because otherwise it's like fucking abduct that bitch. Just do it, dude. Come on.

It's called Taken. Let's get to the Come on. It's called Taken. Let's get to the Taken. It's not called talking, right? It's called Taken. That's a marker that would shit. She really was very careless, that girl. Oh, yeah. You know?

Yeah. Yeah, you don't go with your lame- There's no world. I don't have any kids, but there's no world where I'd let a 16-year-old girl go to fucking greasy Europe. Even if she wanted to see you? For no reason. Even if she wanted to see you too? I just love the main conceit that France is so much more dangerous than America.

Yeah, exactly. Like, spend five minutes in France, you will be abducted by a sex ring. Oh, definitely. You can just cruise around America. Yeah. Although, I mean, it seems like— Well, whoever does abduct you here in America is also Albanian. We have a very open door fucking bring me your huddled masses idea. And those are some of those people couldn't get legitimate work as a police officer in a fucking I might all of my understanding of immigrants is very 19th century. But the point is, is that they turn to crime here and they can, they're allowed to just fucking, right?

It's not going to be a fucking red-blooded American that takes a girl. Right. And you know this from your old-timey safaris where you collect your animals? I'm just saying, I enjoy jingoism a lot. I really like thinking that we're significantly better than everybody else. Oh, well then, yes, Taken is for you. That'll do it. Oddly enough, Taken, directed and conceived

by a Frenchman. Huh. Yeah. Luc Besson. He knows. Yeah, he knows what's up. He knows what those people are like. He sees his penance for being French. Direct the most anti-Europe movie of all time. Eliza, you said that you saw something and were maybe feeling a little bit lied to by Rotten Tomatoes.

Oh. Or you feel like Rotten Tomatoes was accurate. Well, we were saying that I feel like Rotten Tomatoes, you have to understand what's happening with it to really accurately get any info out of it. Because basically, if it's not a big blockbuster movie, the only reviewers who are going to see it are ones who are interested in that movie. Sure. So they are probably going to review it better than... People who are already down with Mumblecore.

Exactly. People who are like, can't wait. Ooh, I cannot wait for the disappearance of Eleanor Rigby. And then once it comes out and more people go see it. Is there a duplass? Just tell me there's a duplass. I'm on board. Yeah. I saw the disappearance of Eleanor Rigby and the

ratings for it dropped drastically from before the opening to after the opening, which is when I saw it. And I was like, oh yeah. Yeah, I agree with it more afterwards. It's not a good film? And I was like, oh, yeah. Yeah, I agree with it more afterwards. Yeah. But it's not a good film.

It's OK. Yeah. It's all right. You know, it's just like meh. OK. Oh, one more quick weirdo thing about A Walk Among the Tombstones. It takes a cut. I don't mean to cut you off, but does he actually walk among tombstones at any point in the film?

He does several times actually there are several walks among tombstones. Is that like his thinking place? Does the line the title of the movie get delivered by someone? No no one says well that was quite a walk among tombstones. My favorite one of those was in Why Did I Get Married Too. Okay. It was so great.

No one says Why Did I Get Married Too do they? Okay. They do really? Yeah so it's like all did i get married too do they okay they really yeah so it's like all these couples you know that are friends but they always have problems and they're uh they and in the first one i don't remember what they're getting together for oh yeah they're going on vacation second one also going on vacation this time to like a lake house and one couple has been just fighting the whole time they were driving up and they get there and they walk in and the other couples are sitting there already relaxing with their chilled white wine. And the new couple comes in and is like, you were being so stupid in the car. And the other one's like, well, you're even

more ridiculous. And one is like, I hate you. And the other one's like, I hate you more. And one of them is like, why did I get married? The other one is like, why did I get married too? And I stood and applauded. And no one else did. They have to have been looking right at the camera when they said that, right? I think they were looking right at the camera, giving finger guns and high-fiving each other. Sure. And then they said, the prestige. Yeah.

That you've been waiting for this whole time. Yeah, the only way a human being who speaks English would actually say that, not that they would, but would be like, why did I also get married? Exactly. But they had to fucking finagle it. Yeah. You know. I wonder what will happen.

Why did I get married? Three comes out. Yeah. I guess just. I think we should all go just to find that out. Oh, yeah, definitely. We are camping out for that one. I guess I was.

It's going to be during. It's going to be during New Year's Eve, during the countdown. Why did I get married? Three! Two! I was imagining them saying that while they were waiting for a table, like while they were approaching a restaurant. Why did I get married? Three?

Three? Yeah, that was my explanation. Just as long as we can get to why did I get married for. Yeah. Why did I get married for the second time? And then that could be the eight i don't know um so uh two two two weird things about well wait and when they get to why did i get married nine it's uh germany german dude it's just gonna burst in and tell them no nine yeah yeah yeah they're all they're all um they're all walking on the grass in a public park in Germany that says – that has a sign that says do not step on the grass.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Nine. Right. Is that this brutal abduction movie takes – has a couple of teaching moments in it. He Liam Neeson has this weird child sidekick in the movie that has sickle cell anemia. And he goes to pick him up in the hospital and a doctor basically to camera just explains for about five minutes what sickle cell anemia is. And it has nothing to do with the plot. I mean, there's at one point where he's like, we should get that kid out of the rain.

But that's the only it's like someone's like, hey, hey listen kids are getting this disease all over the place we need to educate maybe that was one of the kickstarter rewards like you have to decide what cause we explain for no reason in this movie yeah it's like water conservation just barely got beat out by sickle cell anemia and a weird

thing is that kind of a thing about the movie that i kind of liked an interesting thing about the character is that he's uh he's in aa he had a he um as a as a as a drunk cop he was chasing some bad guys and accidentally hit a kid and then decided to you know clean up his act and so you know you see him at various aa meetings and and during this very tense shootout with at an AA meeting? No, no, no. Among the tombstones. He's among tombstones and he's having a

shootout with these thrill kill 8mm jack off perverts who are the villains of the movie. The movie freeze frames periodically while you hear someone reading one of the 12 steps that they don't necessarily apply to what's going on. But just periodically we freeze and hear someone from a previous AA meeting say one of the steps.

So there is this there are several agendas at work in this upsetting movie. Do they go through all 12? No, they skip some. Okay, right. I think making amends is glossed over. Yeah, yeah, because that would be the weird one. Like, after making a fearless moral inventory, be ready to contact people that you've offended. Like, that one's not even a step.

That's just like a, okay, so you're ready for the next step? Like, you know what I'm saying? There's not even a step. That's just like a, okay, so you're ready for the next step? Like, you know what I'm saying? There's not even a step there. I feel like that's like I'm visualizing it in my head as those are all the like hilarious action movie comebacks. Like I'll be back, but it's like I'm making amends and then like breaks an arm and then puts it right. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, maybe that's, I mean, maybe that's a superhero, the 12-step superhero.

I believe the 12-step superhero is Iron Man, although he falls off the wagon a lot. That's true. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, right, if you can deliver each of those 12 steps like they were in Arnold Schwarzenegger catchphrase, it might make them more palatable to drunk kids. Oh, great. Who need to clean up their act. Great. So you change lives.

So yeah, Walk Among the Tombstones. Don't see it. Just watch Taken on FX. It's always on there. Jesse, I wanted to talk about a movie that you

recommended to me that I subsequently watched. This is a documentary about Rick Springfield called An Affair of the Heart. Goddamn amazing. Eliza, have you seen this?

I haven't. I saw Sound City which had a lot of Rick Springfield. What's Sound of the Heart. Goddamn amazing. Eliza, have you seen this? I haven't. I saw Sound City, which had a lot of Rick Springfield. What's Sound City? It's the one about the studio that Dave Grohl got the soundboard from the studio where they had recorded all these amazing albums and it had kind of fallen into disrepair. But you were talking about something else. No, no, no. Hold on. So Dave Grohl,

I'm kind of imagining this movie. This is kind of a audio file. Well, first it's like a history of the studio. Okay. And then he,

and it's where Nirvana, like they had done a lot of stuff back in the 70s like Fleetwood Mac, that kind of era. And then Nirvana went there to record

Nevermind. And so then later, Dave Grohl, I can't remember how, but like found out That kind of era. And then Nirvana went there to record Nevermind. And so then later, Dave Grohl, I can't remember how, but like found out that it was pretty much going under. And so he went and he bought the board. Why is Rick Springfield in this a lot? He had recorded stuff there too. Okay. Interesting. And they're like, you know, this is really going to showcase the musical legacy.

Well, yeah. And the whole relationship, which is probably in there with him and his manager and how things like he had this manager who cared so much about him and then it got like— Oh, I didn't know that. Well, what's the documentary about? So this documentary is mainly about Rick Springfield's weird middle-aged fans that follow him around. Oh, I have seen that. Okay.

Okay. Well, I was going to. Okay. Okay. Okay. Well, I was going to say, how did you come to watch this movie in the first place? I don't, I couldn't give a shit less about Rick Springfield. I never did. That's the appropriate reaction. But. I should say the singer of Jessie's Girl.

Yeah. Anyway. And actually, I have kind of a relationship with that song. Okay. If only for the fact that every dipshit in the world who thinks they're funny when I introduce them to my girlfriend or my wife at the time, whoever the fuck that would have been. They have to sing nine bars to that song. Yeah, exactly. Like think that they came up with it.

Yeah. So I kind of have a love-hate thing with that too in the first place. But anyway, I was with a buddy and we were staying in a hotel together. And he was like, oh, my God, I've heard this is great. So we were like, fuck it. Let's see what it is. And it blew my mind. It was amazing. And it's just – first of all, to watch these like crazy, like sad, fat 50-year- old women who follow him around is phenomenal but what's

more amazing is the cuckolded bitch husbands who put up with this and the way that this one dude just seethes about the fact that his wife is more in love with rick springfield than with him it's mind-blowing like and he's just this just this, like, sort of, like, kind of doughy guinea. And I think he's always wearing either a Jets shirt tucked into jeans or an Under Armour shirt. Yeah. I think these are the two things this man wears in the movie. The craziest part is that he, I guess, was in a band for a while.

And the way he- Is that how they met this dude probably yeah yeah it's gotta be it's and but he's like a dentist now or whatever right and the way he talks about Rick Springfield like you just he swallows words all the time because he's just so he's just shaking when he's talking like his knuckles are white when he talks about Rick Springfield and just he has this one part in the movie where he's like openly hates him oh openly hates him but he's trying to cover it up but it's not he's not doing a very good job of it and he's just like more or less because he was in some shitty band in high school he was like you know i could have done that i could have gone that way but uh you know i'm a responsible

fucking family man so i got my degree in dentistry so I could raise my family. You understand? So it's almost like, yeah, Rick Springfield, you bohemian piece of shit. Like, go ahead. Like, yeah, you may be, but you're not a real man. Like, I'm taking care of my family. Like, it's got that kind of a tone to it. And then he wrote a song about how his wife loves Rick Springfield, which is like the most ironic thing in the world, because the only reason we have a Rick Springfield is because he has a song about coveting someone else's wife. You know what I mean? And then this guy is now – It's like a musical snake eating its own tail.

It is. It's like an M.C. Escher painting. He then also has a song about how his wife loves Rick Springfield, but Rick Springfield loves some other dude's wife. It's just weird. And yeah, and the song's so sad and embarrassing. And at another point, the guy, the director's like, so what would you do if you ever met Rick Springfield?

And he's like, I don't know. I don't know. I might punch him in his fucking face. Like, it's kind of like that. And so then the director orchestrates a meeting with him and Rick Springfield. And the guy, Rick Springfield is such a reasonable, decent person. And that guy just bitches out. Rick Springfield's mannerisms in the movie, like he does seem like a nice, reasonable guy who's like comfortable with where he is in the entertainment industry.

And really comes off pretty well. But he's just always wearing the worst, sad 50-year-old guy clothes. Yeah, he kind of dresses like Jeff Dunham in a way. You know how Jeff Dunham, he's in this phase now where he wears a lot of like— Is it like bowling shirts? No, no, no, no, not at all. No, it's a lot of like— Dunham's turned a corner.

It's like a lot of affliction kind of like some sort of— Like, I still got it, I still got it. Yeah, some sort of gothic crucifix that's way too big. Yeah, with another one like silkscreen just off center of it. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Anyway.

Yeah. Yeah. So anyways – He dresses like a pirate basically. Okay. Yeah. Anyway. So something that I kind of took away from this was like – I mean there is the guy who openly hates Rick Springfield but the rest of this

movie is filled with like b-roll of excited you know 45 50 year old women in crop tops and some of them have their husbands kind of in tow who are like trying to rock out

hey this guy's pretty good I remember that oh we're having a great time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, it's just these guys who are... Trying to save their marriage by connecting to something their wife likes, kind of. Don't, don't, don't. This isn't where they would prefer to be, but they're giving it the old college try. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And I just saw myself at Ani DiFranco concerts, at Sifjan Stevens concerts. And you can get like, what a thing that happens in every relationship. Just like trying to fucking make the best of that thing that they like that you think is kind of dumb.

And I don't know, it was kind of beautiful and I kind of wanted to see if you guys had anything that immediately jumped to mind. It's like here is the thing that I tried and I had a smile on my face the whole goddamn time. I wish I did. What I do have is a 12-year issue with reggae. Oh, my. issue with reggae.

Oh my. So my boyfriend he and I dated years ago and he loved reggae but he didn't there were no posters it only came up when it was like just like in the car if it came up he was like I love reggae

I'm like you don't love reggae and he's like no I love reggae and I'm like well I hate reggae to me'm like you don't love reggae and he's like no i love reggae well and i'm like well i hate reggae um to me it's just like uh it's just like it's so cool to do nothing in our dorm room like that's what that's what i associate that with um and uh and he was weird because it's technically jamaican rebel music but yeah yeah but it is not misappropriated by white assholes with dreadlocks so much yeah you have something to be the soundtrack of eating Doritos. Exactly.

Yeah. Yeah. And hacky sack. It's not totally inactive. Some part of my brain just wanted to correct you and be like, ah, Fritos. Fritos, not Doritos. Oh, right. Fair enough.

Oh, you have a very specific pain. I think I like Doritos. And so I was like, wait, I like Doritos. Just anyway, that's a weird thing about my brain so yeah so so I wouldn't listen to it or hang out with like go to his festivals and stuff and we broke up

and then we got back together like six years later and I was like hey you know what that was shitty of me to be so shitty about reggae yeah I'm gonna be into it this time I'm gonna like get into it that's what couples do you just go for it and then he was like playing some and I was like, no, I hate it. I just hate it. I hate it so much. And I still haven't been able to do music. And I was like, this is good music. So I think I might be coming around. Okay.

But I've just been an asshole for like 10 years on this thing. R-E, reggae. Yeah. Huh. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. Jesse, anything you've given the old college try to?

Trying to think. Marriage in general. Sure. How's that go? You tried that. Does that count? You tried to have a smile on your face the whole time. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

This is fun. Yeah, fun. Monogamy. I mean, mine are such specific gripes. Like at least reggae is a thing that everybody could have an opinion on. Like mine was like going home every other weekend to see my goddamn fucking mother-in-law again. Like, and I really don't mean to sound like a fucking Everybody Loves Raymond episode. But, like, I swear to God, it was like every other weekend we had to go and do shit with her fucking family. And her family is nice in doses. But it was like they were just like we'd get into fights, she and I. And she would fucking call her mom and put her mom on the phone with me. Oh, dear.

Like to for to really sort of like, no, see, she'll tell you. You know, and it's like, that seems unhealthy, you know? So I think I'm not, I want to be playing your game. Like I know you brought this up as a fun topic. I thought this would be fun. I thought everybody would have fun. Mine are just sort of bitter, bitter like, oh, I tried that shit. That can be fun.

So anyway, yeah, it's fine. I'm looking for a Julia Roberts movie. Yeah, I know. That's what I'm looking for a Julia Roberts movie. Yeah, I know. That's what I'm looking for. I can't. No, because I didn't tolerate, like, she loved, like, all kinds of dumb horse shit reality shows, like The Bachelor and whatever other nonsense. Like, I would not play ball with that.

I couldn't. I guess. That stuff is the worst. I guess I try. All right. If. OK, now that you've really. Once I pick this scab, now I'm thinking.

We'll get to the wound beneath it. What's that fucking silly doctor show with Katherine Heigl that was on it? Whatever that was. Grey's Anatomy? That one. I did. You gave it a shot. I sat in with that one for a while.

Yeah. Yeah? Mm-hmm. Did you ever like wonder about it when you hadn't seen it? Were you ever like, I wonder what's going on with old McDreamy? No. I never did but i mean but i didn't i did like okay i guess thursdays are the day we're gonna do that together you know like so that was fine i had a mine mine was and this is this is something that i couldn't relate to her on but also the rest of society. I was dating this girl who, to go to sleep, she had her kind of childhood VHS collection by the bed

in this old VHS player. And when she couldn't sleep, would have to put in an old VHS from childhood. And one of them was A Christmas Story, which I had never seen. That's one of those movies I had Story, which I had never seen. That's one of those movies I had just avoided. I had just avoided like – I don't know. For some reason, I hadn't seen it.

It's everybody's favorite Christmas movie. I had never seen it. I hadn't seen it either. And yeah. And I definitely had to – just whenever I would sleep over, I probably had to sit through that thing for five or six times and just finally had to admit to myself, oh, I think this sucks. Oh, I think this sucks. And just not being able to go to sleep because it sucks so bad, like it keeping me up that

it was so bad. I'm like, oh, this isn't right. Well, I think our like schmaltz tolerance goes up. Right. Absolutely. For. Absolutely. Like for Christmas.

Sure. And if it's not that season. Yeah, it could have been that it was suddenly like 99 degrees in her terrible apartment. In the harsh light of June, a lot of that stuff, you're like, this is terrible. Maybe I'm not in the spirit. Maybe if I had just come in from shoveling snow and had a mug of cocoa. Yeah. And you were like, people do care about each other. Yeah. Aw, families.

An angel gets his wings. There's no God. What the fuck are you talking about? Come on. Come on. That bank should fail. They're all, these are just,

these are hedge fund assholes who are going to destroy the country eventually. Why are we rooting for a bank? Right. Oh, I hope that bank survives. Yeah, right?

Mm-hmm. That is a very pro-big business movie. That's really, how long ago was that? It was... A year thing with the... That seems's really – how long ago was that? It was – Your thing with the – That seems weirdly childlike all over.

Yeah, I mean, sure. I feel like I'm creeped out just at the box of VHS. No, no, no. We can psychoanalyze that later. Like I'm sure they make it on DVD. Right. Oh, yeah. It was a –

Is that part of the ritual? I think so, yeah. Or a laser disc or something. Right. She's like, it was a whole giant folder of laser discs. She has to thread it through or something. Right. She's like, it was a whole giant folder of Laserdiscs. She has to thread it through a projector. We're going to watch the jazz singer again. It has sound.

Yeah, I know. We're going to bring in a piano player. Look, the trade's coming right at the screen. We've seen it before. Yeah. Horse running. Oh, I can't get to sleep unless horse running is playing

oh this nostalgia it's just too much you know pogs and horse running I know yeah all these kids BuzzFeed's 12 silent films

every turn of the century kid will know um okay seven things you won't believe about birth of a nation

well we've talked about movies. We'll talk about something else when we come back on Jordan, Jesse, Go. It's Jordan, Jesse, Go. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. Eliza Skinner, the people's peanut. Jesse Joyce, I'm still not going to do that thing. Maybe you'll do it by the end. Maybe you'll do it by the end.

All right. Fucking, why do I have to have a cutesy nickname? It's just part of it. It's a podcast. You're cutesy pies. Well, isn't it cutesy in a way to be the guy who doesn't have the thing? You know, I think people will find it cute. By the end of this movie, you might come around.

The Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day. All the who's down in Whoville. So, Eliza, you are doing a lot of really cool stuff at the Funny or Die website. I think that's a new-ish thing since you've been on the show last. Yeah, yeah. I wasn't working there last time.

It's been really fun. And something that happens a lot at Funny or Die is kind of the bread and butter of the website is celebrities coming in and doing kind of an unexpected video. Playing with their image or doing something kind of surprising. And from what I've heard that the celebrity pitch meeting is kind of a regular thing around there. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. From people that you don't remember at all to like them. Like we had a pitch meeting with Wesley Snipes recently and. Oh my God.

What? Was like, yeah, I don't have any good stories from it except that I was not. That it happened is a good enough story. Yeah. It was. And he was real cool. But yeah, he's all kinds of people. We had a pitch with Anna

Chlumsky. I don't know who that is. My Girl and Veep. Oh, sure. Wow. Okay. My Girl, the first movie to make me cry in a movie theater, and I still hold it against it because I do not enjoy crying in movie theaters. Ah, well. Discuss it with me. I'm fascinated

by that. But I... Macaulay Culkin gets killed by bees. Sorry, spoiler alert. What a horrible... Right off Home Alone, I was an excited 10-year-old. Anyway. I know.

It's cruel. It should say, hey, your favorite actor, 10-year-old, is going to be killed by bees at the end of this movie. I know, I know. It's emotional. Did it make you fear bees?

Oh, no. It made me fear films and emotions. But they can surprisingly come upon you and ruin your day. It's called catharsis. Yeah. Okay. I would rather remain neutral. You at 10 probably had nothing to cathar.

Yeah. As a 10 year old, it's not like you got to let this out every now and again. Remember when I got a Genesis instead of a Super Nintendo? That's the worst thing that's ever happened to me currently. Yeah. Yeah. So she came in. She was great.

She was really fun. She did say, we were like, so do you want to hear any My Girl ideas? And she was like, no, not really. And then you slowly pushed to the side of the table a giant three-ring binder. Well, no. Then I went, okay, so you're not going to do any, but can I tell you mine instead? Can I tell you mine anyway? And she was like, I guess so.

And I was like, okay, cool. So it's a couple. They move into a house. They're moving all their things. And they're like, oh, we should meet the couple next door. We should go meet our neighbors. And so they go over to the next door. They ring the doorbell.

The door opens. It's you, Anna Chlumsky. And they're like, oh my god, Anna Chlumsky from My Girl. We live next door now. And you're like, oh my gosh, hi. Thank you. So thanks for coming by. It's really nice to meet you. You have to meet my husband. Hold on. Honey, come here. Come over here.

This is my husband, and it's just a bunch of bees. And they're like, holy shit. She married the bees what the fuck they killed her first love yeah and then they go she likes a bad boy she likes a bad boy where the bees in the shape of they're just like a swarm of bees like a cgi every now and then they they can like merge to be a hand picking up a cup of coffee. Oh, that's fun. Yeah, yeah.

Sure. But yeah, she – What was her reaction? She liked it a lot, but she was like, but still don't want to do it. She was really cool about it. It was a really fun meeting. I like that impulse, and I feel like it's something I have at our work a lot is the, I know we're not going to use this.

Please just let me say it out loud. I feel like you've got to do that to clear the pipes. Yeah, exactly. Or else it'll be rattling around in your head and you won't be able to masturbate until it's out. Exactly. I realized that when I said clear the pipes. Well, but that's the worst part is as soon as Jordan says the idea

then he masturbates. So when Jordan's like, I just got to say this, we're like, alright everybody get a tarp. It's been a while. It's like, I just got to say this, we're like, all right, everybody, get a tarp. Oh, a tarp. It's been a while. It's been building up. Haven't had a good idea for days.

It's like a Gallagher concert. All right. Some rednecks bring their slip and slide so they don't get hit with my jizz. I like to sit in the splash zone. Oh, yeah. It's like SeaWorld. Yeah. Only less cruel. Or the Waterworld stunt show. Yeah. Universal Studios. You know zone. It's like SeaWorld. Only less cruel.

Or the Waterworld stunt show. Yeah, the Universal Studios. You know what? That's a great point. What the fuck is the mentality of the people who go to a Gallagher show and don't sit in the area where you'd get hit by fruit? Yeah, we're going to be there for the racist street jokes. They're there to hear some jokes about wops. Street jokes.

Exactly. They're there to hear some jokes about wops. To sit 20 rows back and hear fucking dumb puns. Uncle, drunk uncle jokes. Yeah, yeah. Well, I'd like to see Watermelon Smashed. I don't want to get hit with it, though. Shut up. That's cool to see it, but I don't want it near me.

No thanks. Yeah, it seems like the whole point is to get douched with Gallagher's... Live your life is what you're saying. There you go, yeah. Don't spend your life sitting on the sidelines. Get in the game.

Get in by that, I mean. Don't be a spectator. Be in the splash zone. Eyeful of watermelon. Speaking of bees, I've always said, you know how Gallagher is just teetering

on the edge of fucking violent insanity all the time, you know? That like, yeah, that his last show, he's literally going to come out and, you know, it's like, is this what you want? And do all the watermelons and then shit. And then he's literally just going to pull out like a big jar of bees and like a baseball bat. And laugh like a maniac. Just smash it. Just a coffee can full of fucking nails and pieces of glass.

Like an improvised explosive device. Just like an IED. I think if I saw that headline, I would be like, yep, that makes sense. Makes total sense. It's going to go, release the bees. I'm as relevant now as I've ever been. I'm as relevant now as I've ever been. And then he gets on some giant roller skates and jumps on a seven-foot-tall bunk bed.

You better be careful. He'll come after you talking about Gallagher like that. Oh, man, we've said his name three times. He's going to appear in the mirror behind me. Just hope your pickup truck doesn't break down out in the swamp. Yeah, right. Ask for directions. Yeah, they've seen Gallagher around these parts when the moon behind me. Just hope your pickup truck doesn't break down out in the swamp. Yeah, right. That's for directions. They seen Gallag around these parts

when the moon gets full. You're going to shut off the lights in bed tonight. You're going to pull down the covers. There's going to be a watermelon in the bed.

Oh, fuck. It's already all cubed. Yeah. This just says, what's the difference between a black guy and a Mexican? What? I don't want to hear the punchline to that. Definitely no.

It doesn't even sound like a joke. That doesn't mean I didn't just try to think of a punchline right now. That's because you're a professional. Yeah, yeah. You know, you can post them in the MaxFun forums after the show. Please don't do that. Everybody, fans, hashtag it. Eliza Skinner.

No, definitely don't put my name on it. What's the difference between? Okay. Please make sure it's not about food. So what did you guys land on with Chlumsky? I don't know, actually. It hasn't been long enough. We sent her a bunch of ideas, and I think she's going to pick one, and we'll see.

But it will not involve. It will not. A swarm of bees shaped like a man. No, no. That's unfortunate. So that's just something I can share with you. Thanks. Thanks.

Yeah. No, one of the guys we work with has a lot of great train wreck stories about that. Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah. Nick Weiger works with us. Oh, I love that guy. The Gene Simmons one is particularly that. Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah. Nick Weiger works with us. Oh, I love that guy. The Gene Simmons one is particularly amazing. Oh, yeah.

That guy is crazy. I think we can third-hand try and tell that story. Are we allowed to do that? Yeah, sure. Why not? That was before I started there. I guess he came in. I don't think it's a showbiz secret that Gene Simmons is a little full of himself.

He basically, like, I guess he, at one point he was like, you guys want to see a trick? And he's like, he pulls out a, what was it, a $100 bill? I think a $1 bill. Oh yeah,

he goes, you want me to see, you want to watch me, you want to watch me turn this $1 bill into $1,000? And they're like, all right.

And then he signed it. He autographed it and he goes, ta-da. And it's like... You know his wallet is just full of $1 bills he's already signed. He's like, I can't use any of these,

but it's such a good bit. Oh, we won't take this. Not even filthy strippers will get tipped with them. Gene Simmons, that's gross. It's just like if you were really going to do that, like if you were actually going to write that as a thing, like you would scale it back like a thousand. That's a lot. Like a hundred maybe.

What's the name of this fake Liam Neeson movie? A Walk Among the – no, call it Throat Punch or something. A little on the nose. A Walk Among the Tombstones. Yeah. Greaseball Revenge.stones. Yeah. Greaseball revenge. Right. Immigrant comeuppance.

Right. Take that, foreigner. So great. You're having a lot of fun over there at the funnier dive. I'm having a lot of fun over there. Oh, also you got to do something with Christina Hendricks, which seemed great. I did. Yeah, I got to. I wrote a sketch with Christina. Here's my little industry secret. I write sketches with multiple women parts in them and I name one of them Eliza.

Oh, okay. So they have to let me be in it. And woman parts. That's the industry term also for a female role. Yeah, I wrote a sketch with Christina Hendricks about the pay gap. We got a five-line vagina for an 18 to 25-year-old woman. I'm a woman part. Yeah, and that was about the pay gap. That was really fun.

She was great. She is gorgeous. Sure. Like, she's gorgeous on screen, but in real life, you're just like, well, I'm going to jump out a window because nothing will ever be as beautiful as that person. And I also did a fun video with Kristen Bell where she played Mary Poppins and that was really cool. That's terrific. Yeah. So, you know.

Bell seems nice. She was. Yeah. She was real nice. Have one coming out soon with Nick Offerman. He was a delight. So, yeah. Funnier guy.

Watch it. Got it. Surf over there right now. You can search my name and find all kinds of things. Speaking of kind of things we've been up to, Jesse, I wanted to ask you about something. What? Since you brought it up to me at the office. You took your first trip to Disneyland recently. I did. Yeah. And I mean, I think, you know, people who maybe aren't familiar

with you and your body of work who have been listening to this podcast you wouldn't describe your attitude as Disney-esque. How did that go down? I am an intolerant person. Is that what you're getting to? Actually, I guess how have you avoided a trip to Disneyland your whole life? Is that just not something your parents loaded up the station? Well, I'm an East Coast person. We went to Disney World once when I was like nine. I guess you've got a closer Disney thing. Yeah, it was just around the corner for you.

East Coast people have no business going to Disneyland. It's the smaller of the Disneys anyway. Sure. So why would you fucking, you know what I mean? So like, yeah, New York, or I mean, East Coast people go to Disney World. Okay. You know, that was cool. I remember, the weird thing is my dad always hated it.

You know, like my dad always had this like, I guess we got to do this because we're kids. You know, like. Sure. So he took my brother and i classic dad toot yeah yeah exactly right and we went in a good dad voice by the way thanks yeah we went in a van and you know drove down there and uh and you know i mean my brother and i just think that we had like a fucking terrific time you know like we were like which nine and six do you remember which parks i don't know disney world and then the Golf Ball Epcot thing. Epcot. And then, I don't know.

I think we did some other shit. We were there. The thing I remember the most was Boardwalk and Baseball. It's no longer existent, but it was a baseball theme park. And it was the greatest because I was like nine or ten. Like you could get a – they made a baseball card with your face on it. Like you got your own fucking baseball card. There you go.

Yeah, yeah. You just make up – it just blew my mind that I had my own baseball card. Do you have stats? Yeah, yeah. You just make up. It just blew my mind that I had my own baseball card. Is everyone's stats the same? I don't. Probably. I don't know why for some reason. Like I'm curious about the stats. It's bullshit. You know that, right? Like it didn't count for anything. But when I was 10,

it was neat. I have a Time magazine with my face on it from when I was 10 at King's Dominion. Yeah, it's cool. Was it a kid of the year? I believe it was, yes. Oh, cool. Kid of the year. We're real creeps here at Time.

It was a China nuclear disarmament discussion. Like it was just an actual normal Time magazine cover. They just threw a kid face on it. With a 10-year-old and a Garfield t-shirt. Slobodan Milosevic indicted whatever was on the cover of time that week but they put you on there yeah right you have like some fucking light up headband because you just did some other dumb ride but anyway but for some reason it's interesting because I had this discussion with my brother about it, is that like if you were just to ask us just like, hey, what do you think of Disney World? My brother and I would go like, eh, fucking.

But it's like if you scratch the surface on that, that's not our opinion at all. That's entirely just my dad's bias. You know, like there's so much shit that like i mean it's it's a really like my parents are very tolerant smart uh they both have doctorates they're great people so i really lucked out on the uh things my dad doesn't tolerate department as to what sort of i just picked up through osmosis but i can based on my just visceral reaction against shit like disney world like i can totally see how kids grow up racist you understand what i'm saying because it's like because you've taken something that is

a pretty universally believed to be a pleasant experience right and for some reason my automatic instinct is to go like oh fuck that place but it's like if you look i only ever went there once and i had a great time like you know what i mean like my family's the same way it's like if people like it they're like it's got to be trashy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, my parents don't tolerate trashy things. Oh, it's fun?

What good is fun? Right. So I'm just really glad that my parents are just sort of decent enough people to not have that seep into anything other than mundane shit like Disney World. Sure. Because you're lucky they don't feel that way about a race. Yeah, exactly. That's my point, right? So, like, anyway.

But whatever. It was fun. I would never have gone if it weren't for the fact that a buddy of mine works for Disney, so he got us tickets. Yeah. So my girlfriend came into town, and the two of us went. And it was like, it's great. It was totally pleasant.

Like, it was a really good time. And I didn't get annoyed at anything. Like, it was just a fun day of shit. Terrific. What did you do? Splash Mountain? Space Mountain? No, I don't.

We didn't do roller coaster or shitty things. Like, we just kind of, like, we did some of the rides, but like the cutesy ones, you know? You just wandered at the delight? Yeah, kind of. Yeah, just wandered about. Like, I was really thrilled about the Haunted Mansion. You got a giant pickle and a plastic bag. The Haunted Mansion was like totally my jam.

Now, when did you go? Just like two months ago. Oh, okay. So it was still the Haunted Mansion. This time of year, they make it into Nightmare Before Christmas. Oh, yeah. It really gets me. I don't like that.

I like the Haunted Mansion. Well, I remember the Haunted Mansion was the thing that blew me away when I was nine in Disney World. And so I was like, we got to go do this. I'm pretty sure I remember it being awesome. And it was. Because it's kind of like what my office is set up like in a way. Real spooky.

Yeah. Just kind of like, you know, like sort of. Is way yeah just kind of like you know like sort of is jesse's office actually stretching right yeah yeah so there's that hanged man at the top yeah yeah so it's cool um but uh it did make me go like ah you know what i'm gonna have to fucking get on the ball about having kids at some point you know like mostly because like it's a thing i've always wanted to do you had some fatherhood feelings there. Yeah, but mostly just like I got to get this done because I'm 35. You can feel your sperm becoming lazy. Not that, but I'm 35 and we walked around all day and I was like fucking – it was exhausting.

And I was like, well, best case scenario, like I feel like the time to take a kid – they can't be younger than 10 or they're not going to appreciate it. Like maybe seven, I guess. I went to Disney World when Like maybe seven, I guess. I went to Disney World when I was five and I loved it, but I did fall asleep halfway through Epcot. Yeah, I just think it's a waste of money to take somebody who's not going to get it. So like seven – To be fair, Epcot's kind of a snooze. It's just to get kids to appreciate diversity. Yeah, man.

I didn't get that. My whole life I was like, I'm going to make it back. I'm going to stay awake the whole day. This past fall we went. I went with Parna, Nancherla and Janine Brito. We drove down there and it was the worst. I loved it. But it was, it's like if a Vegas casino opened a science museum. That's what Epcot is. Hey, you just got drunk off watery G and T's. Why don't you pretend like you're learning something?

Yeah. Go back to the craps table. Electricity makes your hair stand up. Anyway, go eat some $21 shrimps. Anyway, nachos. All right. The like whatever festival of the world area is just if they took out all the rides at a regular park and replaced it with alcohol, with like a little stand where

they sell alcohol from that country oh yeah um and just tons of people making a lot of racist ethnic assumptions oh dude yeah tons of like well you know all the japanese and we're like walking like we're walking past conversations like that like oh god i don't know i don't know what oh so yeah you have you have you have people from around the world from various backgrounds uh being forced to talk about a certain culture and you get to learn what this person but like what they're like americans though walking through it all will explain like you'll see like a grandfather explaining to his child uh or to his grandchild like why something in this area of the world that we're walking through is like that. And then it's like veering way off of the right road.

They're a modest people. They're a very modest people. Here's the two things I know about Ecuador. They have a very pronounced sense of shame. What? They do drink a lot. A lot of them have a problem with that. Happy drinkers.

They got a festival where they cut the heads off authority figures. That's how we got soccer. That's where soccer came from. You want to buy a kite? I'll get you a kite. I'll get you a kite. Anyway, never trust a Bolivian. Get some nachos.

Yeah, exactly. But if you asked me, I would go back to Epcot in a second. Yeah. I have a lot of ideas I want to pitch to them, a lot of things I want to fix about it. First, it's a ride where you marry a swarm of bees. Okay, that would be fun.

They have a ride called Ellen's Energy Adventure, which is hosted by Ellen DeGeneres. What? Circa her sitcom, like her original sitcom. I was hoping it would be Ellen Cleghorn. Oh, yeah. That would be great. That would be a lot sassier. Let's learn about it.

Science. Yeah, it's Bill Nye the Science Guy. Is Jeremy Piven there with her? That's her weird friend? I think she referred to him. Oh, great. Because it was on the set of her sitcom, too. That's hilarious. And then at one point you're in these huge cars

that are like church pews, and then you go through animatronic dinosaurs, and at one point she's fighting one. There's an animatronic Ellen. It's real weird. Yeah. But I loved it. Sounds like a hoot. Yeah. It's a Small World is fascinating for that same reason, because

they literally, it's like it's like, oh, we gotta represent every culture culture but with the two things that there are about them. And so it's like you go past like Scotland and it's like, yeah, whatever, kilts and cheap. I got it. Bagpipes. Cool. And then you go around – but I swear to God it was fascinating. Well, first of all, my girlfriend is Canadian.

So the Canadian one is just a fucking goober in a Mountie hat with a beaver. Like standing next to a beaver in their way. And a guy buying cheap Viagra for some weird reason. That's the whole Canadian thing, right? Did you go on the Jungle Cruise? No, I didn't. Wait, what? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Oh, I saw that. But no, we didn't. Why? Is that? Oh, there's some fun races in there, too. Okay. Oh, I saw that, but no, we didn't. Why?

Oh, there's some fun races in there, too. Okay. Because the most amazing one is like the sort of Middle Eastern, that part of the world. Yeah, they don't really specify that to a country. It's just the general. Yeah. Well, really, weren't the countries created by the British? I mean, aren't we talking about lines? Margaret Atwood.

Margaret Atwood. Good memory. Thank you. I would never have retained that name. But it's literally, it's fucking flying carpets. Yeah. That's one of the things. That's an imaginary thing.

Like everything else, like the Swiss, it's like, yeah, whatever, fucking blonde and snowy mountains. Like, yeah, that's a real thing there. But fucking flying carpets is not an actual thing. It's because they got to tie it into their movies more importantly than teach anything. So they got to be like Aladdin. Doesn't one country have the Little Mermaid somehow? But there's so many. Oh, you might be right.

Yeah. It's like, all right, like fucking how about like invented math and, you know, whatever. Then have a bus blow up. Like one of those things. Like two things that really happened there. You should do an audio tour to go along with it that people can just put on their head. Or a little podcast. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, it's like how the – it is weird because it's such a double standard. It's like you go through Greece in that and it's not Zeus plucking Aphrodite from his head. Right. It's a gay bathhouse. Yeah. Right.

One of Greece. There's so much butt fucking when you go around it's accurate i'm really shocked kids go there and there is just so much butt fucking well but it was different back then it wasn't sexual it was sure exactly it was just familial i love how people say that too they're like yeah it wasn't sexual it was like yeah it was before battle and it's like why what i don't fucking my brother was a soldier. Just clean the pipes. Yeah, yeah.

Clean the pipes. Oh, there you go. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jessica. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. What's up? My name is Jasper Redd, co-host of The Goose Down, along with the lovely Kimberly Clark, and we want to invite you into the comfort and groove of our podcast that encompasses the arts and entertainment. You can check us out at Maximumun.org. Also available on iTunes.

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Jordan, Jesse Goh. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. I'm Eliza Skinner, the people's peanut. I'm Jesse Joyce. You're not going to fucking get me to do that. No. That's going to become your nickname. You're protesting.

I feel like he's going to trick you into it one of these times. That's the thing is that people are going to go like, oh, he's too good for this. And it's like, no, too good for this and it's like no it's not that it's like it's just that sure why do i need to i've already sold it's like you know i'm gonna let me speak for myself like i'm gonna sell me i don't need to fucking jump through a dumb hoop i'm not gonna you know that you you don't not deserve it you know yeah man you deserve a nickname if you want one. I'm not going to do it. You're good enough. I don't care. I don't.

Okay. By the way, I mentioned this at the top of the show, Jesse Thorne, out sick. If you want to speed along his recovery, when you're talking about the show online, why don't you hashtag it, Get Well, Jesse, and attach your favorite Tom of Finland photo so he can see them. Hey, something we like to do on this program basically every week is take a dive into our answering machine and listen to some momentous occasions, some moments of shame, some other things that sometimes come up, but not often.

Hey, let's do that now. Brian, why don't you play our first call? Hey, Jordan, Jesse, and guests. This is Mike in Alice Springs in Australia. I just got off my bike. I just ran into work. I'm a teacher at the middle school, and there's a park that I ride through on my way to work every day. And listening to you guys, listening to Jordan talk about his Burning Man experiences,

and a magpie just came down and pulled the earphones out of my ears. I'm still shaking. And he wouldn't let me alone. So there I am, riding through the park with kids on teeter-totters and I'm swearing and cursing and now I'm still shaking and I've got to go to a fucking staff meeting.

And I've been fumbling around trying to find your number, but I know you probably had your fill of stories about crows, but yeah, this is about a magpie and it's a distant relative of a crow or something. But they're a very common bird in Australia,

and I think they fill the same niche in terms of being very aggressive and annoying. Anyway, love the show. Thanks, guys. That guy had the British actor trying to do American voice. He's Canadian, that's why. Yeah, that guy is definitely from Canada. A Canadian living in Australia.

All kinds of stuff going on. He is so drunk. Yeah. And he ripped him out of my ears. Cute. That sounds terrifying. It does sound terrifying.

For you guys, Jesse has a long-standing vendetta against crows. I guess I don't know anything about the character of the magpie as a bird. Is it a thieving bird? Is it an aggressive

bird they like uh shiny things oh so i probably had some diamond earbuds yeah i mean that's so that so like being a magpie is someone who like collects uh gaudy shiny things and because of that also they will frequently go for people's eyes i believe oh my my great-grandmother had her eye picked out by a fighting cock but but that's a different bird. Yeah, that's when she became an oracle. Oh, she had another eye she shared. Oh, okay, sure. With three other gorgons.

I've heard about your grandmother. Great grandmother. Your great grandmother. Your no-no. Grandmother, of course. One-eyed peg from the five points. One thing I do know is that they only attack when they have rabies. So it was probably in his best interest to call a fucking podcast out of the gate after that happened to him. So rabies is still a thing. It is still a thing.

There was a guy last week who got bitten by a bat. There's an amazing web video. We did it on the show. This dude, some just like fucking 40-year-old asshole with an acoustic guitar in the woods. They're camping or whatever, and he's like jamming out. And then this crazy bat – it's like 2 in the afternoon. He's the bat from Pitchfork. This crazy bat just goes back and forth a couple times.

I don't get the record. It's a music snob website. It's a music snob website. Oh, okay. And bit him right on the neck, like in the neck part where bats bite. Like a vampire place. Yeah, yeah. And then apparently the friend shot it with a BB gun and they took it to go get analyzed.

And it did, in fact, have rabies. So that's it. But fortunately, it was like there's enough time. Because rabies is like literally 100% fatal after a certain hour. And you have to get like a bunch of shots in your stomach. Or that's what happened on – that's what I learned from Different Strokes. There was a Different Strokes rabies episode? Are you sure that's not tetanus?

No. Arnold gets bit by a dog and they have to go find the dog. And he doesn't want to bother trying to find it. But they're like, well, if we don't find it, we have to assume that you do have rabies. You have to get 90 stomach shots. And get, like, yeah, 50 shots in your stomach. And he was like, what? Yeah.

God, those 80s sitcoms were so weird with their like message episodes. Very special episodes. Yeah, yeah. Like, you know what? Kids need to know about rabies. Do you remember the fridge door one? I miss them. I love those so much. Oh, yeah, sure.

Where the kid gets caught in the fridge. Caught in the fridge, yeah. And that's why from now on we have to have doors taken off fridges when you throw them away. It's like, you sound upset about it. Well, to me, I swear to God, it's like, well, nobody does get rabies anymore, right? Because we don't live among things that, yeah, yeah. So that is literally our survival of the fittest. Like, I never got stuck in a fridge door because I have very little empathy for kids who die

in refrigerators. You know what I mean? Like, that seemed like it was a huge problem for my generation growing up. Sure. Is we were all – It was a culling of the herd. It was our polio is what I'm getting through. I feel like my generation, it was syringes inside of things.

Oh, yeah. Just hidden needles. Yeah. Like there were these people who were like, ha-ha, I will hide my syringes in all of the soda cans. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was a big problem. Yeah, yeah. Like Halloween candy had to be ins hide my syringes in all of the soda cans. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was a big problem. Yeah, yeah. Like Halloween candy had to be inspected for syringes.

Yeah, there was a nice holder. For like teeny tiny fun-sized syringes. Yeah, just for Halloween, the fun-sized syringes come out. And then the day after Halloween, they're all 50% off. Yeah. So just wait. Just wait. If you were a diabolical whatever kind of person would put razor blades in candy bars.

Sure. Like, it seems like it's not in your best interest to, like, be – to do it at your home. You know, like, oh, kids will come around and I'll just feed them razor blades. Sure. That's going to get back to you. You're going to narrow it down. They'll be able to – there's 40 pieces of candy here. One of them has a razor blade.

We'll be able to get to the bottom of which house it came from. My mom had a neighbor who kids accused him of that, ruined him. He was a doctor, lost his job, ruined him. Well, he's got access to syringes. Well, and they were all like, oh, we were kidding. Never mind. But he was still ruined. Oh, no.

Even after the kids. That's like the Salem witch trials. Sure. That's what happened. It was some twatty little girls that just said like, yeah. Yeah, two little girls. Yeah. And they were just flipping out all the Salem witch trials. Sure. That's what happened. It was some twatty little girls that just said like – Yeah, two little girls. Yeah. And they were just flipping out all the time.

Right. And they were like, well, that's not normal flipping out. Did you guys ever have to take your candy to the police department to get it x-rayed? No. We did that one year. Wait, the police department? Not like the hospital? Yeah, I think it was maybe the police or fire station.

Wherever my mom voted. So rather than razor blades, you got stomach cancer for 100% of the candy. Now I have lazy sperm in a micro penis because I ate an irradiated Butterfinger. Hey, but I'm alive. But I'm alive. I don't have a cut up esophagus. Like you wouldn't not just immediately swallow a razor blade anyway. Do you not just chew a Reese's Pieces?

Yeah. How the fuck are you just going to- Kids just open their mouths like pythons. Open their gullet and just swallow it like a bush pig, just whole. That's one of the things were better back in the day things, like your refrigerator that I believe. Kids don't trick or treat anymore. They go to malls. Yeah, sure.

They go to businesses. That's not trick-or-treating. That's not meeting your neighbors and having – The guy who works at the Orange Julius, he's a member of the community. I think that's so sad. That is very weird. And I think that it instills like a bond between children and places of commerce. Sure.

Yeah, totally. It shouldn't be like, that's children and places of commerce. Sure. Yeah, totally. Which is weird. You shouldn't be like, that's my friend, The Gap. Have warm nostalgic feelings about Wetzel's pretzels. Yeah. Brian, do we have another call in there? Hey, Jordan, Jesse, and guest. Just pulled out of the line from the drive-through pharmacy.

And they had two lanes open and sat there for 20, 25 minutes. Finally, cars moved a little bit, except the car beside me, the van beside me. I looked over, they hadn't moved when the car in front of them left.

We'd been in line so long. The guy and his son had fallen asleep in the van waiting at the pharmacy. Gotta love it. Bye. Cool. They fell asleep at the pharmacy. I hope they fell asleep. Otherwise they died. Could have been a

father-son suicide pact. Going to pick up some sort of... You know, our beta blockers aren't ready yet. We might as well run a tube from the exhaust to the inside of the car. I mean, if they were waiting for their medication and it was taking that long, maybe they ran out of all their keeping them alive – I don't know. Oh, sure. Oh, right. Yeah.

They were in line for narcolepsy pills or something. Sure. Yeah. I don't think there's a pill for that, but whatever. Yeah. They were just in line for some Red Bulls or something. Yeah. That's the treatment for narcolepsy, Red Bulls?

Yeah, sure. Loud noise. Just if you feel yourself randomly falling asleep, chug one of these. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, and then go to a rave. Or hey, hey therapy. Yeah, hey, hey. Friends help out with that.

Loud construction outside your house. Yeah, yeah. Or, yeah, in my neighborhood in Astoria, it's just the cure for narcolepsy is Nicaragua wins a soccer game if you settle at 2 in the morning. What part of Astoria? No, no, no. You want me to just tell you what my address is on a podcast? What line were you on?

Yeah, yeah. The end. Oh, me too. Yeah. Still am. Like, I don't live here. I'm not committing. That's what I did when I went back to work in New York.

Hey, can I just go back to Halloween for a second? Please, yes. You know what always infuriates me? No, no. No diverting the conversation on this show. This has to be a – Well, you seem like you're very agenda-oriented in a good way. Like, you have, like, okay, here's what we're talking about now.

I feel like I'm being led in a direction, which is nice. Oh, yeah. Happy to help. But anyway, I remember, like, okay, here's what we're talking about now. I feel like I'm being led in a direction, which is nice. Oh, yeah. Happy to help. But anyway, I remember like I don't understand. I didn't – my first understanding of economics was like at the age of nine, I remember how infuriating it was. Did you ever get the like construction paper pumpkin that somebody taped a fucking nickel to? Do you know what I'm talking about? I don't know what this is.

That's awful. It's so weird to me how like 60% of the time I'll bring this up and people have no idea what I'm talking about. But 40% of people are like, oh yeah, totally. It would be like, like instead of giving a piece of candy, they would literally just hand out change. You know what I mean? I got penny ghosts.

Like little scraps of white paper that someone put like, I don't know, like eight pennies in. And OK, so you understand the principle. Like it's not it's not completely whether or not it was a paper or a construction paper pumpkin. I just got handfuls of change hurled at me. Yeah. Well, just the economics of the fact that you had to cut out all these fucking little dumb ghosts or whatever and then go through the hassle of taping a dime to every one of them. And back then in the 60s, that must have been worth even more. We're just getting a dime.

Like you're spending a lot of money and you're diversifying it among 70 kids. So like rather than give 70 kids a dime that we don't give a fuck about, have like a lottery system. Give one kid $7. Sure. You know what I mean? Like we, how much better would that be to get seven fucking dollars? Tape to a pumpkin. Then just, yeah, like spreading the wealth around your neighborhood.

What do you think the motivation was? Do you think it was like a, you think it was like a nutrition thing? I think it's like, it's literally, well, I think honestly the motive was like, oh shit, I didn't get anything. I got a jar full of money. And all these paper pumpkins. But it's also like, yeah,

it's always some older person who's like a dime. You can go to the dime store. Go to the picture show. You choose your own candy. Yeah, exactly. Right. And it just bugged the shit out of me. It's a penny.

It's at the Woolworths. I'd get a bunch of candy with this. Right. And it just bugged the shit out of me. It's a penny candy. It's at the Woolworths. I'd get a bunch of candy and like 23 cents. And it's like, what the fuck am I going to do with this? Getting to buy one of these candies. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Anyway. I have a ton of. It just seemed like it's a lose-lose for everybody in that situation.

I got creeped out by popcorn balls. Oh, yeah. Those are really weird. It was just like, I know this has been handled by strange old lady hands. Yeah, sure. Exactly. But you had an understanding of germs at the time? Like you gave a shit?

Kind of, yeah. It just seemed odd. You know, it would be like if I had opened up my lunch bag and just had an unwrapped sandwich in there. Like I still would have been like, huh? It's been touching other matter. Yeah. It seems loose. And the elderly are cesspools.

Let's face it. They're petri dishes filled with bacteria. I like my grandmother's treats, but some- Some random grandmother. Anybody over the age of 70, there's far too much fecal matter in their kitchen. Well, I think we've learned three things from this segment. One, pennies instead of Halloween candy is bullshit. And also, tons of fecal matter in there.

Oh, yeah. Oh, absolutely. The elderly are gross. Yeah. I don't think we said it, but fuck raisins at Halloween, too, right? Oh, yeah. The worst. Can we all agree?

Fuck a little box of raisins? The worst. Come on. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse Go. It's Jordan, Jesse Go. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. Eliza, la, la, la, la. It's Jordan and Jessie Go. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. Eliza Skinner, the people's peanut.

It's Jessie Joyce. Yay. Oh, he's the – who's adorable? Who's adorable? Yeah. Jessie Thorne, of course, out sick. Why don't you hit him up on Twitter, hashtag getwellj, Jessie, and attach a pic of your favorite Tom of Finland painting. Eliza Skinner, you are a stand-up comedian who performs all over the place.

You write for Funny or Die. People should go there and watch your videos. Any live dates we should look out for? Oh, gosh. I don't know off the top of my head, but I post them all on Twitter. Sure, you should probably just follow Eliza on Twitter. Yeah. Well, great. Jesse Joyce, of course, you're a writer for At Midnight, which if people are listening to this show regularly and not watching regularly, that's a goddamn mistake.

And you should support me in my job, you motherfucker. No, sorry. Wow, I just turned on you, fake audience member who may or may not exist. It was an act. You're right on at midnight. That's on Comedy Central at midnight, Monday through Thursday. Anything else people can keep an eye out for? Well, once again, I'm on at midnight on Monday nights, the 22nd.

Sure. So I will be one of the three comic guests on the show. Nice. Yes. Always terrific when you panel on the program. Thanks. It's very funny. Yeah, it is fun.

Yeah. Yeah, it's good stuff. It's the reason I kind of agree to the writing portion of it. Sure. Because they'll throw me on it periodically. And you are always a huge help when I do because I'll always be like, you're the guy I run my shit by. Aw, shucks. Thanks.

Happy to help. Yeah. Happy to sit outside and laugh while you smoke cigarettes. Yeah, yeah. That's pretty much what happens. But yeah, and then just Twitter. Just go to the- Boom.

Because I do shows, too, all the time. Jesse Joyce does indeed do shows. As does Eliza Skinner. Follow them on Twitter. Go to their fucking- What? What? Oh, I also host a show every week.

Oh, well, plug that, goddammit. I know. I forgot. Fuck. Every Thursday at the Virgil in LA, it's Big Money, hosted by me, Brian Cook, and Baron Vaughn. It's free. It's fun. It's 8 o'clock. Come on out. Fuck. Every Thursday at the Virgil in L.A., it's Big Money, hosted by me, Brian Cook, and Baron Vaughn. It's free. It's fun. It's 8 o'clock.

Come on out. Yeah, and actually, it is walking distance from Flounce Vintage in Twig and Twine. So if you want to go over there to the adorable bullshit district and then see Eliza's show, which is hilarious. We do have craft cocktails. There you go. Hey, that's appropriate. Craft cocktails are one of those things where I'm like, man, this is such a lame hipster thing. I'm like, God, these are fucking delicious.

Oh, these are so good. Fucking I hate this. Fine, I'll pay $15 for your delicious burger. Give me a past. But can you fill the can with an infused gin? I would like an infused gin. I am so unfamiliar with like hipster bullshit that like when she said craft cocktails, my literal

first thought was like, yeah, like a macaroni, like somebody's putting fucking macaroni and booze together now. It's like, it's like bacon bourbon. Oh, you're back on the wagon.

Macaroni and booze. That sounds so gross. There's a Liam Neeson movie. You and I need to go to see Jesse. What do they stop the gunfight periodically to remind you what the 12 steps are? Damn it. Maybe nonstop is good. I'll rent that.

Anyways, Brian Fernandez on the boards back from England. Good to have him back. Of course, you can discuss the show on the forum at MaximumFun.org slash forum. We got a Reddit up there at Reddit.com slash r slash maxfun, I think it is. But just Google MaxFun Reddit. Like our Facebook page. Leave us a goddamn iTunes review. There's some nasty ones up there right now.

So if you like the show and want to help us to promote it, you can leave us a nice review on iTunes. Great. We'll see you next week on Jordan, Jesse, go. See you. See you. on iTunes. Great. We'll see you next week on Jordan, Jesse Go.

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