Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 360: Boog Megaton with Matt Kirshen

Episode Date: January 19, 2015

Comedian Matt Kirshen joins Jordan and Jesse for a discussion of baseball nicknames,  British actors doing American accents, and Jesse's Chuck E. Cheese experience.

Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you. It's Jordan, Jesse Goh, I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Beautiful rainy day in Los Angeles. You know, whoever said it never rains in Southern California was full of bullshit. Because it's drizzling lightly right now. Hey, whoever said that, have you ever heard of today?

Yeah. Because it is. Fuck you. Fuck you. Who was that? I don't know. Tony, Tony, Tony for one. I don't think they were the first.

You know what? I'm kind of liking this. It's kind of cozy. What do you say we don't do the show? We go back to our houses. Spend a little time with Netflix. Just binge watching some Netflix, huh? Have some cognac maybe?

A little cognac. A snicker of brandy. Our pajama pants. Just have a little us day, you know? Do you mind if I put on my pajama top too? No, I would prefer that you be topless but with pajama pants. Just have a little us day, you know? Do you mind if I put on my pajama top too? No, I would prefer that you be topless but with pajama pants. I want to just like help you to maximum relax here. Can I ask you a question?

Please. If I'm not going to wear the pajama top, I'm going to go ahead and wear the bearskin vest. Okay. Thank you. Deal. Because that's how I get cozy. So yeah, show canceled today. Just imagine us in vests at home.

Ryan, can you turn over the open-closed sign? We're closed for business. I'm just going to watch all of season three of Friends. Would you say that's the best season? Oh, most definitely. I like any season with Burt Reynolds. Was he on Friends sometimes? Yeah, I like the one where Monica was dating Van Damme. I watched an episode of Friends.

Great. Not long ago. I think. A few years ago. It was the first time I ever had. I think with the addition of Friends to Netflix, I've been hearing more of the sentiment from people, which I agree with, that Friends doesn't hold up great. Well, it sucked then. Yeah. That's the hard thing to convince people of.

That it sucked then? Yeah, yeah. God, only – So, yeah. So I think we're coming around. Can I say, I want to amend that slightly. Because I do think Friends sucks now and has always sucked.

However, I will say that a lot of the stars of Friends are really good at being on Friends. Yeah, I mean, I think that's the idea is that everyone in it is great at being on a sitcom and did great things post-Friends. And I think, I mean, I think that's the idea is that like everyone in it is great at being on a sitcom and like did great things post Friends. And I think, you know, you of the, you know, kind of corny CBS shows that are super popular now, that will probably be the case. Like, oh, these people were all great on this dopey show.

Yeah. So, yeah, I think nothing against, you know, Jennifer Aniston, Lisa Kudrow, who went on to do great things. They're both brilliant. I think they're both really great. But yeah, Fritz is bad, and I'm glad we're coming around to that as a nation. Well, speaking of our nation, let's introduce our guest on the program. A real American. He's probably the realest American since Hulk Hogan.

He's the host of the Probably Science podcast. Was he 45 minutes late? No, he was 55 minutes late. Matt Kirshen, how are you? God, I'm so sorry. Does he have no regard for the dinner party I'm going to later? Yes, he does have no regard. Does he not know that this is my first date with my wife in like eight weeks?

Oh, God, I feel bad. I feel so bad. I completely, I had it mugged down. I was looking forward to it for like weeks. You're saying that as though it makes it better and it mugged down. I was looking forward to it for like weeks. You're saying that as though it makes it better and not worse. No, I was looking forward to it for weeks. And then today I was like, I was just poaching around the house doing nothing. Like I wish I could even say like, yeah, I was water skiing and fighting, like fighting off pirates or whatever.

You were doing so little that you wish you could tell us that you had watched season three of Friends. You're doing so little that you wish you could tell us that you had watched season three of Friends. What were you – when you got the it's time to podcast text, what were you up to? I was walking from the kitchen to the living room and debating walking back from the living room to the kitchen. Can you give us some pros and cons? Let's hash this thing out. Yeah yeah sure yeah maybe we can help you i mean you're gonna be back at the house eventually okay you're gonna this dilemma is gonna come up again what are some of the advantages of the kitchen so the kitchen has food and drink in

there right uh but i had already had some food and some drink so you were would you characterize yourself as satiated so i was I would characterize myself as having eaten a sufficient, like a necessary amount of food. Like I definitely eaten enough food to survive for the day. Like I'm not currently hungry or thirsty. Right. However, potentially able to eat more food. Right. So there was, well, for one thing, there's always room for Jell-O.

Did you have any Jell-O on here? I did not. So that was another well, for one thing, there's always room for Jell-O. Did you have any Jell-O on hand? I did not. So that was another thing. That was another factor in my decision process. Do you keep the Jell-O in the living room? Should I? That's where I keep my Jell-O. Yeah, so it can watch TV.

I've got so much to learn about your country. The thing is when you're gone, it gets lonely. Yeah. So I like to put on NPR for my Jell-O. So it thinks there's someone in the house. And your Jell-O is kind of cultured. Yeah, man. Listen, I've got a dinner party later.

Okay. I've got a thoughtless bottle of $10 Whole Foods wine that's going to kickstart this party when I bring it. So while I'm not there, they're just going to be sitting around going, where's this $10 bottle of thoughtless Whole Foods wine? And you got to understand, Matt, a $10 bottle of wine at Whole Foods, 49 cents anywhere else. It's a 49 cent, less than two quarter. See, the only thing I know for sure about cheap wine is cheap white wine substantially worse than cheap red wine. Oh. That's my only wine tip.

Cool insight. If you're going to go cheap, go red. Trust the man. He's got an accent. Right? I believe it. Cheap red wine's bad, but cheap white wine's unbearable. Guys, I've got something stuck in my craw.

Do you mind if I do my signature segment, what's stuck in Jesse's craw? Sure, sure. So the Oakland Athletics athletics my second favorite baseball club baseball is an american sport involving bats and balls that's a sport you wouldn't know it as short cricket yeah it's a lot like cricket but without a meal break and it but it does still happen over five days right it's it's less likely to start a war between India and Pakistan. So, my second

favorite baseball club, the Oakland Athletics, apparently, let me give you some background. In the 1960s and 70s, and I know that you know this, Jordan, this is more for Matt. The Baltimore Orioles had a star named Boog Powell. He was a, I believe, first baseman outfielder, if I'm not mistaken.

Quite the power hitter. Right. That's a name that could only exist in America as well, right? And only on a baseball team. He's not quite a Hall of Fame quality player, but nonetheless the kind of guy that your dad might give you a baseball autograph by him because he met him at a special event at a used car dealership. So he was famous for something other than his name being Boog. Yeah, sure. Okay.

So the guy is named Boog Powell. Now, recently – He could be a convict slash folk hero. Yeah, sure. Okay. So the guy's named Boog Powell. Now, recently- He could be a convict slash folk hero. That's true. Like a Pecos Bill type guy. A guy on a chain gang. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.

Or the guy who supervises the chain gang. Sure. And he's always got like a, what's that, a wheat stalk coming out of his mouth. Yeah. Like either way, there's a good chance John Baez sang about him at some point. He almost certainly has. There's like I can't guarantee this 100 percent, but I'm pretty sure he's got a line of country hams. Also, boog might be something that like a grandparent says that you worry is a racial slur.

Like, I don't know who that's supposed to be. Actually, it just means a good slugger. Oh, right. It's a good slugger. Sure, yeah. So,

Boog Powell, legendary baseball player. Someone who hits a lot of dingers. Which is also something that your grandma might say in your worries.

All right. Too many dingers in this neighborhood. What is she talking about? Oh, it's baseball again. We're okay. We're okay. Oh, okay.

Okay, yeah. She prefers small ball. Right. The A's made a trade recently, and apparently, and I had no idea of this fact, but apparently they had a star minor league outfielder named Boog Powell, and they traded Boog Powell to the Tampa Bay Rays, which I'm- So this is a... He's not related to the 60s Boog Powell. Okay.

So I'm glad you've touched upon that because that's what's stuck in my craw. Wow. This minor league baseball- The two men can have the same name? This minor league baseball star whose name is Boog Powell is completely unrelated to baseball legend Boog Powell. I think he was named. Boog Powell is this guy's name.

And Boog Powell is the other guy's name. They've never met. Their dads weren't friends. They're not uncle and nephew. Is Boog a nickname? I don't know. Well, that's important. Probably, right?

Because it's like two sugar-rate boxes. Yeah, yeah. No, I don't think – it's not just something that you pass out to any baseball player. Okay. How many Boogs do you know? Well, here's what I'm saying. If Boog is like some sort of like southern nickname for Bobby or something, there being two Bobby Powells isn't that weird. Can I –

But two Boogs. Which in turn is a nickname for Robert. Right. Robert, Bobby, Boog. So Robert equals Boog. Jordan, this is as complicated as cockney rhyming slang. My Little League coach used to call me Jesse the Body. But I don't today.

After the star of Predator. Arnold Schwarzenegger. Today's star in Predator films and go by Jesse the Body Ventura. Sure. That's the thing that upsets me. Here's what I'm just, I'm wondering if it's a colloquial thing, like calling someone junior or. I don't think it's a formal thing. It's like calling, I don't think he's Boog Powell Esquire powell on his birth certificate i'm just thinking back to like senator boo kennedy

i don't think he's got a royal warrant for playing baseball he's the official supplier of baseball to HRH the queen. Here's my question. How old is, and what's the year of birth of the new boog, and when did the old boog stop playing? Like, was the new boog named after the boog? In both senses. The main boog Powell, the legendary boog Powell. Here's the thing. There was a football player named Wonderful Terrific Mons Jr.

His son, Wonderful Terrific Mons III, played minor league baseball for the Braves. But they're related. It's a family relationship. Sure. If your dad's named Wonderful Terrific Mons, you can be named Wonderful Terrific Mons. If your dad's named Boog Powell, you can be named Boog Powell. You can't just try and steal his powers. Listen, I think we need to find out what the root of Boog is.

By the way, Teresa's pregnant. We're going to name the kid Oil Can Boyd. By the way, Teresa is pregnant. We're going to name the kid Oil Can Boyd. So in reference to your question. Yes. The older Boog Powell, his career started in the early 1960s and ended in I think the early to mid 1970s. So I'm going to say that he's probably about 70 to 75 years old right now. But 73 says Brian Fernandez.

But if there's a current player, then that current player, I'm just going on like. He's about 20 or 21 years old. Yeah. Born in 1993. Brian's got all the information in his fingertips for once. It's not guaranteed, but it's fairly safe to assume someone who ends up as a professional athlete grew up in a family that has some affiliation with sports.

Generally, you would think that maybe the dad Like their groundskeepers? At least an affinity or a fondness for sport. There's not a lot of kids who have to say fuck you dad, I'm playing baseball! They would have to do it behind their dad's back.

Yeah. Like you would join a band or do theater or something. Yeah. Maybe to go to the professional level. Maybe that's the point. Sure, I guess your dad wants you to. You go to college, you get yourself a trade. No, I'm definitely,

I'm going to be the first boog in professional baseball. I don't know. Well, hold tight for a second. I can't say this for sure because I'm pretty sure that one of the guys from De La Soul has a son who's a college football star right now. So I'm saying that might have been a teenage rebellion on the part of Paz Danus' son. I'm going to run away from the arts and toward sports. Yeah.

But I think that's not unfair, Matt. Yeah. So you're saying he just figured my name is Powell. I could name my child Adam Clayton, but instead I'm going to go with Boog. After the drummer from U2? No, Adam Clayton Powell, isn't that? That was a legendary civil rights lawyer. No.

And I want to say maybe also Supreme Court justice. Who's the drummer for U2? That is Adam Clayton. Oh, okay. But without the Powell bit. No. And I want to say maybe also Supreme Court justice. Who's the drummer for you two? That is Adam Clayton. Okay. But without the Powell bit. Gotcha. I have some more funny name news. Okay, great.

Anyway, sorry. Sorry, wrap this up. I have some more funny name news. Boog Powell, that's what's been stuck in my craw. And then the newly wed game music plays. Are you sure that's the best choice? Yeah. Well, because, you know, what is a wife but a human that's stuck in your craw?

What about this? Oh, yeah. Yeah, we should definitely play the Imperial March. The Star Wars song. How great would it be if that song had lyrics like the theme song from Star Trek? You know, the theme song from Star Trek? Oh, yeah. Sure has some weird.

Star Wars. Get ready for Star Wars. We're shooting our phasers. Or is that from Star Trek? Yeah. We're using lightsabers. There you go. and using the force. That's great.

Yeah, okay. Sorry, Jordan. Go ahead. Name fun with Jordan Morris. I saw the third Taken movie last night. I didn't even know they made one Tekken movie. Oh, it's Taken, Jesse, Taken. There's not been a movie based on the Iron Fist tournament that happens in the Tekken video games.

I felt reasonably confident that if I said Tekken, you would be able to say some specifics about Tekken. I was leaning on you for that. Okay. Yes, they didn't make a Tekken movie. It follows the panda. The fighting panda is the main character. Kuma, I believe his name is.

Japanese for bear. Played by Pablo Sandoval. Go ahead. So the first Tekken movie is a pretty cool movie. Super watchable. Directed by a man that has a European but not ridiculous name.

What proportion of the movies that – what's his face, the legitimate actor who's become the star of Taken? Liam Neeson. What percentage of his action movies have you partaken of? Let's see. I have seen all of the Takens. I saw A Walk Among the Tombens. Uh-huh. I saw A Walk Among the Tombstones. L'Ontario.

Sure. And I guess I've also seen The Grey. Did you see the one on the airplane? No. Oh, non-stop. I kind of want to see non-stop.

I heard that's a good one. I know. I've been waiting for it to come on the HBO Go. So what do you... Wasn't he in the Star Wars as well? Oh, he was in the Star Wars. It's kind of an action film.

Liam, Liam Neeson, he is Irish, but tries to sound not. So, okay. So the first Tekken was highly washable. Yeah, because of the panda. Right. But when the perspective switched, then they started following the kangaroo. Right. And that's where it went to shit.

Later, the worst was probably when it followed that Irishman. Yeah. Oh, boy. Yeah. He was upset that someone stole his daughter. Oh, yeah. So, yeah. Definitely, I think we've talked about the-

We've talked about the gray. We've talked about the European to European accent. We've talked about the European to European accent, the European accented actor trying to be American and this weird, unplaceable thing they have. And I think the, you know, patient zero for that is Liam Neeson and taken the like. Yeah. Something about ours. Yeah, that's right. I'm American.

Uh huh. Yeah. From Brooklyn. Yep. That's right. Grew up there. I'm wondering whether it's partly – and I'm going by both what I noticed when Americans tried to do British accents and what happens when I try – I'm very bad at accents in general. But my main problem when I try and do an American accent is I jump between regions. So I can't stay on one. I'll aim for like mid-Atlantic, but then there will be a bit of New York in there, and then sometimes it will go southern.

So you're going mid-Atlantic. but then there'll be a bit of New York in there and then sometimes they'll go southern. So you're going mid-Atlantic when you say mid-Atlantic do you mean do you mean that you're going for like a Maryland accent or do you mean that you're going for like a Cary Grant accent? I'm going for a Cary Grant look but a Maryland accent. Well you

definitely look like Cary Grant. You're doing a great job. You have his easy elegance. But that's when Americans try and do British accent particularly if they try and do a london accent what tends to happen is they do posh vowel sounds but with working class consonants oh and it ends up sounding really it ends up sounding really weird so they'll just sort of rounded like give us an example so it'd be like uh are you going to the shops uh going to the it's like they'll do like glottal stops in there could you pass the water and it's like that wouldn't sound right it would

be water it would be either water or water it would be it'd be a shorter vowel sound if you're doing a like working class like cockney or whatever. Do you mind that I've taken this opportunity to make noises while you're talking? No, I quite enjoy it. Okay, good. But yeah, I wonder whether it's sort of an overdoing and underdoing at the same time. And I think that's what happens when Brits try and do an American accent. Sure. Can you do – what is something that we could have Matt Kirshen say in his American accent?

I'm very bad at this. Yeah, well, that's the whole point. So let's say – give me a sentence to say. Yeah, let's – you want to tailgate before the big game? We're going to pound some brews. Okay, this is going to – Stinkly American. You want to tailgate before the big game?

We're going to pound some brews. It's terrible, right? It's just – No that. Stinkly American. You want a tailgate before a big game? We got to pound some brews. It's terrible, right? It's just awful. No, it's great. It's great. I love it. I want to pound some brews with that guy. Right?

Just so you could just make him say more things. Sure. He may have already pounded a few brews. He does. He does sound drunk already. You're American. I mean, to be fair, Americans, we're a drunk people. It's a little bit like watching The Wire.

And you know how, I don't know, have you watched The Wire? Some of The Wire. So, like, on The Wire, there's an interesting group of accents. You have your British people doing American accents. The two stars of the program are both foreigners doing American accents to varying degrees of success. Dominic West, horrible. Idris Elba, pretty good. Right.

That was my understanding of it as a Brit watching The Wire. But again, Idris Elba, I think, lived in New York for a long time as well. There you go. So then the other element on The Wire is then you have people doing generic african-american youth accent and then you have a few people that they cast in baltimore who talk in a baltimore accent which sounds like space aliens like when when uh prop joe is talking this character on the wire like you really can't believe that that's a real accent it's as though you it just seems insane it's like hearing a new weird regional british accent that you've never heard before

and like you're like wait a minute why are o's pronounced as y's and m's pronounced as x's but then other whole parts of words sound totally normal. Yeah, I can see that. That gives you that weird sense of dislocation. And British accents are weird as all hell. Oh, yeah. Well, what's amazing is that you pack them in so tight. Yeah, that's what's ridiculous. You can go from, even like Manchester to Liverpool is about an hour's drive apart,

and it's really distinct accents. Well, it's like the difference between San Francisco and Lake Tahoe accents. I don't even know what Lake Tahoe accents. I don't even know what Lake Tahoe says. Lake Tahoe accent is chiller. Yeah, it's like slightly more chill. All right.

A little more chill. Yeah, that's the great thing. Particularly West Coast America. It's always funny to kind of ask British guests this. Of the American actors who have tried to play British,

who do you think is the worst? Oh, I don't... I mean, the archetypal one is Dick Van Dyke. Like, that's the go-to. Dick Van Dy like that's almost mary poppins and i i think like that almost you know like the way when a new celebrity appears like or politician or whatever the first impressionist who nails that person like then every other impressionist every other impersonator is doing like a version of that like they're not doing their Jack Nicholson they're doing the Jack Nicholson that they've

heard other impressionists do I think Dick Van Dyke set like I think he's like patient zero for the American oh yeah I mean I definitely I think I remember having to have a British accent in a high school play. Yeah. And just doing like, well, what's all this then, governor? You know, like. Step in time, step in time, step in time, step in time. And I always have to say like backstage just to get yourself into the voice. And even though the character was not a chimney sweep, I always had soot on my face. Just because I thought that's what British people looked like.

Well, we do. It's also that little touchstone. It's like you need something that you're in, so to speak, to the perfect accent. Yeah, so that's pretty bad. There's a few bad ones. There's a few good ones knocking around. Okay.

Renee Zelga in Bridget Jones. Okay. Superb accent. Really? Yeah, really, because it was a really specific British accent. It wasn't just like the, again, it was like the difference between someone doing general middle America or someone doing Chicago and getting it right. Right. It's not just somebody that listened to the World Service for a long time.

Yeah. And mastered the King's English. So either she's got a really good ear for accents or she worked really well with someone who's specialized in that or both. I don't know. But that one was great. Can I tell you guys a secret? I happen to be looking through the catalog for the Los Angeles City College Extension today.

And I really got interested in taking dialect for actors class. Teresa took a dialect for actors class when we were still in high school at ACT in San Francisco. And it was so thrilling to me when she would be like, oh, wait. And that's the accent,

that's the dialect that actors should have? Yeah. Why are you... It's like a rhythmic thing. Right. You want to be able to feel the language.

The dialogue Jesse was specifically working on there was those aliens from sesame street remember those guys yeah i love those guys um yeah i mean that could be i imagine that could be a fun thing for couples because you could bring the accents into your lovemaking then it's like you're fucking an italian stallion sure yeah well that's what i or a's what i would ask her to do like a i guess what i'm like a philadelphia alone yeah sure yeah it's all the fun of cheating with no repercussions exactly it's all the fun of fucking frank stallone by the way it's frank

stallone okay so mr stallone's less talented brother oh man i just saw a joey travolta record in an estate sale oh wow yeah i thought about buying a I just saw a Joey Travolta record in an estate sale yesterday. Oh, wow. Yeah, I thought about buying it. Very handsome. Not unlike John Travolta. Oh, sure. Less successful in the entertainment industry overall. He had a record, though. He did have a record.

Disco hits? God bless him. I presume so. Yeah. Seems like it. Probably disco hits from 1983. Mm-hmm. That would be my best guess is the genre for Joey Travolta.

Sure. Okay. So the Taken movies were still in. Yeah, this is still funny name news. Yeah. We've gotten a little diverted. That's okay. I think it's been a blast.

Thanks. You know what? I give some of the credit to Matt Kirshen. Oh, let's give most of the credit to Matt Kirshen. Some of the credit goes to Matt Kirshen. 40%? I mean, I made noises while he was talking. So half of his talking I take credit I made noises while he was talking. Sure. So half of his talking

I take credit for and then all of my talking. Oh, so just a weird thing about... Can I make noises during the rest of your bits? Oh, I insist you do. So yeah, so the first Taken movie

directed by a guy who has a European name, not that weird. You know, pretty good movie over the top, but the action scenes are cool. There's some legitimate suspense. It's well made. Liam Neeson's great in it. The other two movies are kind of just these cash in.

It seems like they were filmed in three weeks. What? How does the plots differ? So, yeah. How does the plots differ? So, yeah. So the first taken movie is – it seems like it's like if your dad wrote an action movie. It's like a – Liam Neeson's daughter goes to Europe against his wishes.

He thinks it's too dangerous. Yeah, Europe is very dangerous. And at the airport, she gets – not at the airport, but at the airport, she meets someone who follows her back to the hotel. And so she's been in Europe for three hours and gets snatched and sold into sex trafficking. So this is like the proof of the cautionary tale. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, exactly. The U-Goats? Is there another like one in the series where someone puts their arm out of the window of the car and it gets snapped off?

It's actually the second one is his daughter goes swimming too soon after eating. It really cramps up. CIA World Factbook, to be fair. If you read the CIA World Factbook, I think the ranking for most dangerous continents goes Europe, North America, Asia, South America. And then, of course, the safest is always going to be Africa. And so I think it's perfectly reasonable. I think you're right too. They should just – instead of having him say that, they should just show the CIA world fact.

I think so. The most dangerous continent for an American to visit is Europe. By the way, like, what percentage of the CIA's resources get put towards publishing an almanac? I wondered that when I first learned about the existence of this document. Mostly it's, you know, international espionage and so on. But we also, we've got a good publishing division collecting. You won't believe our maps. Very colorful.

Yeah. Little tidbits of information. Yeah. And that compass rose. Forget about it. We also illuminate manuscripts. So, yeah. So the other two movies.

So, yeah. The second one is he goes on a vacation to some Eastern European country. Oh, the bad guys are all just these kind of generic track suited guys with their voice. You know, these are – I am the bad guy in this movie. What's amazing, that was a perfect Bratislava accent. Thank you. Yeah. I studied there.

I actually lived there for a while. Yeah. And then his daughter and wife both get taken in the second one. So one additional person gets taken. He gets taken for a brief period of time and the daughter has to locate him somehow through setting off grenades. And the third one, and they say this in the trailer. She's a dolphin. Right.

It's the echolocation. It's the echolocation. Right. And the third one, this is not a spoiler because I say it in the trailers, but he is wrongly accused of the murder of his wife. So there's less taking in this new one. Uh-huh. No one is taken.

No one is absconded with. They're marketing it as the grand finale of the Taken trilogy. Yeah, yeah. So there could be more taking. I can understand that. Critique number one. Can I tell you something about – oh, I want to hear about the funny name. Oh, yeah.

Sure, yeah. So this is basically what I'm getting at is that like – so first one, respectable. The second two, just kind of these junky poorly made cash-ins right uh they and the name of the guy who directs these is pretty pretty amazing i would say a real life kade jaeger as far as appropriateness matt for you mark walberg's name in the fourth transformers movie is Cade Yeager. Nice. The guy who just directed the Taken sequels, Olivier Megaton.

And, I mean, not to be xenophobic, but that is the greasiest name. Megaton. Yeah. Olivier Megaton. Oh, man. That name smells like a hookah bar Do you think that's just Gerard Depardieu's Directing name It's like what they call him

In the satirical French newspapers This is my pseudonym And shampoo range On the subject of how dangerous Europe is, I was at this delicatessen in Eagle Rock here in Los Angeles. Right. Northeast of Los Angeles. The Europe of America. It was called-

It's a very European neighborhood. Oh, very European. Cobblestone streets. Canals. Yeah. And- Oh, anals. I'm sorry.

Not canals, anals. I'm sorry. Not canals. Anals. And it was called like original famous New York deli. Famous original New York deli. Delicatessen famous New York original. Some combination of those words. Not famous at all. Only been open for 10 months it just sounds like a collection of words that you find written on a like a t-shirt that's printed

in english in japan that's what i think it is i think what happened is he bought some overrun napkins that were intended for some sort of chinese restaurant in china not a chinese food restaurant a delicatessen, a New York-style delicatessen in China. They printed too many napkins. It went out of business. He just bought it and was like, okay. It would be cheaper to register a new website for this restaurant

than to actually reprint these napkins. Anyway, for those of you who listen to this show for restaurant reviews, actually a really, really excellent food. I was, like, really impressed by this food. So you were just getting like lunch. You weren't getting, you know. I just got some lunch. Okay.

You're not getting meat for the week. No, but the proprietor is there. Uh-huh. And the proprietor looks like he couldn't, it would be hard for him to look more like the proprietor of original famous new york deli like he looks like if mario from super mario brothers was on the sopranos was he wearing a hairnet like yeah he was wearing a hairnet his hair was slicked back he was about five foot four, probably weighed 220 pounds.

Like he was basically, he had about, he was about the shape of a soup can. He was wearing a white apron and he had the most amazing conversation. There was this guy who was maybe 50 there with his dad who was maybe 80. Right. And they were really enjoying their meal and they're talking to the proprietor about how much they're enjoying their meal. And the grandpa there is from New York. And he's like, oh, you know what? He goes, I could really do some damage here. He's like, they got egg creams here.

You know, like the whole thing, right? And the proprietor goes, and they say, so when did you open this restaurant anyway? And the proprietor goes, eh, ugh. They're like, did you come from New York or what? Did you have a place before? And he's like, I just got back from Europe. I was living in Budapest for a number of years. What?

Wait, hold on. Budapest? He's like, it's beautiful over there. Learn to speak the language. I was like, okay. It's a beautiful culture, eh? Hey, it's lovely. Did you know it's two cities,

Buddha and Pest? They're on opposite sides of a big river. Anyway, that was great. That was my perfect New York accent. Very good accent. Pretty, you know, I lived in New York

for a while. That'll be it. I'm actually British. I don't know if you knew that. Well, I knew. I could tell. You're on the be it. I'm actually British. I don't know if you knew that. Well, I knew. I could tell. You're on the email list. I can see it in your eyes.

You assumed that I couldn't be British because I'm black. You just made many assumptions there about me. I think the most – and this sticks with me. This is one of those things that like should not i should not still be mad about but i totally am yeah as i remember being at a a theater arts party in college sounds pretty dope so far i know yeah certainly nothing infuriated could happen at this and just hearing this dude who was like one of those dudes Just hear him say he's talking to someone and says like, you know, says like he's talk, talk, talk, says something kind of British and then says, oh, my God, sorry. I was in Europe over over the break and I'm just a sponge for accents.

And I'm still mad at this guy. I can picture him. Like, I think about it sometimes when I buy sponges, I think about this. Like when I like go to the supermarket and get a sponge, I'm like, oh, remember that guy that dipped shit in college who said he was a sponge for accents? And I like get mad at him all over again. How would you compare your level of anger at this guy to the level of anger that you had at the guy who lived on our hall who always wore a pharmacy jacket with a big green pot leaf on it. I was kind of into that guy. Yeah, that guy's doing his thing.

I'm sorry. I was in Jamaica over the holidays. I just pick up garments really easily. I'm a sponge for clothing. I'm a sponge for logos. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse, go. It's Jordan, Jesse, go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.

Jordan Morris, boy detective. Brian Fernandez, Sonny D. Wait a minute, Brian. You're not Matt Kirshen. No, no. I'm Sonny D. I'm minute, Brian. You're not Matt Kirshen. No, no. I'm Sonny D. I'm Brian, the producer. Okay, okay.

Let's get down to business. First of all, Jordan and Jesse Goh coming live to San Francisco Sketch Fest in February. Buy your tickets, San Franciscans. Come on. Get on that. My brother, my brother, and me is going to be alongside us. It's going to be a blast. February 7th, 1 p.m. at Cobb's, I believe.

Cobb's Comedy Club in historic North Beach. And I think we've got Maeve Higgins as our guest. Oh, the delightful Maeve Higgins. Does not get any more charming and delightful than Irish comedian Maeve Higgins. I think it's going to be a great show. She has her own show on Irish public television, which is called Maeve Higgins Delicious Vittles. Okay. Pretty sure it's called Delicious Vittles.

That sounds right. Tasty Vittles. It's something Vittles. Okay. And it's like a- I mean, I think Vittles is the important- In any title that has Vittles, that's the important word. It's like a cooking show sitcom where she and her sister cook like, cook something, but it's not really about what they're cooking.

It's, like, almost a sitcom, but mostly it's just about how adorable and hilarious Maeve Higgins is. But she is epically. So, yeah, if you're ever watching Irish television, that's the thing to watch. Also, speaking of food shows, our friend Brian Fernandez has some big news. Brian! Yeah, that's right. We have a new MaxFun web series coming out called Brian and Lindsay Will Totally Eat That. Well, we

hope we have a new MaxFun web series coming out. We hope that we do. Okay, so here's the deal. Brian is, of course, the producer of this show. Lindsay is the producer of Wham! Bam! Pow! and also works in our development department. And in every episode of this program,

we throw some food at them and then they have to eat it. Yep. We catch it and then put it in our mouths. I just took a look at the pilot. It's about chocolate-flavored Twizzlers. Hershey's Chocolate Twizzlers. What do you think, Brian? It's bringing back some memories of waxy food.

Is it Twizzlers that have a chocolate coating, or is it Twizzlers that have a chocolate flavor? It's chocolate flavor. Yeah, there's no, it's all, it's consistent throughout. It's like people said, you know what I love about Twizzlers? The weird, gummy, waxy consistency. You know, I think that is what people who love Twizzlers like about Twizzlers, the weird, gummy, waxy. You know, I think that is what people who love Twizzlers like about Twizzlers, though. Our friend Brian Beckett in this lane. I think they like the idea of eating a candle.

Yeah, that's what it is. There is a certain, sometimes by Twizzlers when I'm getting on a plane, there is a certain satisfaction in that weird kind of waxy snap. Sure. And the fact that it doesn't really have much taste. So you can just kind of keep putting them in your mouth over and over relative to like a red vine, which is more flavorful. It's less of a food and more of just like a food item. Like it's just a food-ish item. Yeah.

It's food-like. It's a non-poisonous substance. That if you want to, you can put in your mouth. That can be ingested. Yeah. Anyway, we have one month to raise the money to make this show. Our friends at Hover have a cool challenge grant. But basically, yeah, I think it's a really cool show.

You can watch the pilot right now and watch the Kickstarter video. Just search for Brian and Lindsay will totally eat that on Kickstarter or look for it on MaximumFun.org. We'll have it up on MaximumFun.org. We'll have it up on MaximumFun.org. We made this pilot with Brian and Lindsay, of course, and a whole team of really amazing people. Our friend Ben Harrison, who directs Put This On, and our friend Noe Montes, who takes pictures at MaxFunCon, was the DP. Yeah, it's just such a fun, silly, cool thing and we need to raise a bit of money to make it so that everybody can

get paid. We're very proud of it. It's the first ever attempt at making video here at MaximumFun.org. So kick in a few bucks. There's lots of great thank you gifts. We've got a refrigerator magnet that tells you all of your conversion rates.

Oh, a Toad Seat tote bag? Yeah, hashtag Toad Seat is the hashtag. So we. Oh, a tote seat tote bag? Yeah. Hashtag tote seat is the hashtag. So we made a tote seat tote bag. All kinds of cool stuff. And of course, you know, producer credits and you can sponsor. There's a website for every episode of the show. I believe.

Those are real fun. I believe the website for the Twizzlers was chocolate.shoes. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, you can sponsor one of those websites. All kinds of cool stuff. So look out for it. It's really great. Also, one other cool thing is going on at

MaximumFun.org. We just launched our new pop culture chat show called Pop Rocket. Brian, you were saying you were just listening to that. Yeah, I was just listening to it the other day or yesterday, I guess. And I love it. I think it's great. It's like different voices that I haven't really heard take on pop culture.

And so it's really – hosted by Guy Branum. He's really, really funny. Yeah. I think we all pretty much agree that Guy Branum is one of the funniest humans. So yeah, it's great that he's going to have a show every week. Can I tell you a secret? I not only think that Guy Branum is one of the funniest humans, but one of the reasons that I took him out to lunch and begged him to host this show was that I also think he is a brilliantly incisive guy and a guy with incredible kind of cultural understanding and sensitivity. and I like I wanted

I was so excited to have Guy because not only is he just super funny and not only is he very democratic in his taste the kind of guy

who loves to celebrate pop culture but like he's also a guy who can just drop an insight bomb on you at the

at the tip of a hat yeah one of the best you know that classic expression drop an insight bomb at the tip of a hat yeah sure anyway so go my mom had that crocheted on a throw pillow You know that classic expression, drop an inside bomb at the tip of a hat. Sure.

Anyway, so go. My mom had that crocheted on a throw pillow. That's what I. So subscribe to Pop Rocket. Go and watch Brian and Lindsay's show. Brian and Lindsay will totally eat that. Think about supporting that Kickstarter. And we'll see you at SF Sketch Fest.

We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse, go. It's Jordan, Jesse, go. I'm Jesse Thorne, the voice of the millennial generation. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Matt Kirshen, also here. Can I run a nickname by you? Yeah, love to. Sure, please. What about Jesse Thorne, tomorrow's entertainer today?

Oh, I like that. I mean, I guess that kind of implies that you can anticipate entertainment trends. Did you come up with that by yourself, or did the focus group suggest that? I hired a futurist. Right. He's actually also who I'm going to be relying on for future entertainment trends. One thing is one big trend is going to be like coming up with futuristic nicknames. Yeah.

Your logo is vastly improved. Thank you very much. I said it in that computer font from like war games. said it in that computer font from like war games um hey uh jordan you mentioned to me that i never talked about what it was like when i went to uh chucky cheeses that's true i think we you you you were talking about strategies for going to chucky cheese i think if i remember correctly i said eat before you go because the food's probably bad yeah so i didn't eat before i went thoughts uh that's one of... I want to go to one at some point

because it's on my list of very American things that are probably terrible, but I should experience and probably enjoy just in a touristy way. Yeah, so... You'd be mortified to be there, but I'd be like, this is great. This is everything I wanted.

So in the UK, they don't have pizza restaurants aimed at children with robotic bands? No, we keep them separately. Oh, okay. Separately. That's the wrong part of speech. It was a nightmare. Okay.

The parents of the child whose birthday it was are the loveliest people. And their daughter also once pushedon and he fell into a brick and had to go to the hospital and uh they've been apologizing ever since okay um which i can't i can't seem to convince them that uh it's time to stop that's a thing that children do uh-huh but they're such lovely people and also then like the more they apologize the guilty you're gonna feel when sim Simon avenges. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

Yeah. And I because because the girl didn't know what she was doing. And Simon, I mean, if you've seen some of these drawings that he's done, he knows exactly what he wants to do to her. You know what I mean? Exactly. And it is terrifying. It's actually like it's like a Bond villain level. Like there's a sawmill and some sharks.

Sure. It is crazy. This poor girl. No, but her dad's- And he's typing all these up on an old typewriter, right? Yeah, exactly. Her dads are the loveliest dudes. They're that kind of like, I don't know if you guys belong to Kaiser, the healthcare group. They're a real nice healthcare group know an hmo that i belong

to okay i belong to the role okay and they got these and of course you're a follower of the kaiser so um i uh i think the they're the dads are sort of like – just imagine like a nurse, like a nice male nurse and then like a nice guy that like greets you when you cut your foot at the hospital. Like they're just that kind of real nice guy that wants to take care of you and they're so sweet. And yeah, I came hungry and there's nothing else for an adult to do there besides chase a child around in a circle. So I ate a lot of pizza, and it sucked. And I ate a lot of salad from the salad bar, and it sucked. Sure. There's something where you could – I'm just imagining like a little scoop of garbanzo beans.

Yeah, exactly. It takes effort to get salad wrong as well. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Particularly nowadays when companies can just buy bags of the constituents of salad and just tip them into the various trays not like before when they had to have their own farms right yeah like back in the day when you'd have to you know you'd they bring a cow as well into the building and you'd go yes okay that's fine yeah and then they shave bits off the side of it and so on yeah, you have to make sure that it hasn't gone off. Right. You know, that it doesn't taste like cork.

So overall, I would say it was a fucking nightmare. They put a blacklight stamp on your hand that matches a blacklight stamp on your child's hand so no one steals your child. Okay, that's clever. Yeah, it's clever. It's probably, to me anyway, more terrifying than if they didn't do that. Okay. Because it suggests that child stealing is like a major consistent issue for them that they've had to come up with solutions to. Either that or the kind of people who go to Chuck E. Cheese need to check which one their child is.

Yeah. Oh, it matches. This one's mine. But also it's a good excuse to see if your child has cum on it. That's true. Put also it's a good excuse to see if your child has cum on it. That's true. Put it under a blacklight. Oh, how was the band? Did they just play the new stuff?

So the band is so not interesting to the children. Not a single child had any interest in the animatronic band. That's because they're just fucking playing that new album. We want to hear the hits. They want to hear the hits. I bet in one or two songs... I don't know how long Chuck E. Cheese has been around, but decades at least. Yeah. I bet when it first was a thing, it was

mind-blowing. Yeah. Because they didn't have robots at the time. Right. But now every child has its own robot butler that it programs. Right. Exactly. Jeeves. Yeah. Ask that it programs. Right. Exactly. Jeeves. Yeah. AskJeeves.com. Yeah.

He's a sort of robot butler. The internet's friendliest robot. What if AskJeeves.com just abandoned being a website and started being a programmable robot butler for children? Probably good for them. So they were somewhat interested in Chuck E. Cheese himself, which is a woman in a mouse costume. And there are these people. How could you tell it was a woman? These sort of party fluffers that go from table to table pumping up the children.

Yeah. They don't know what they're doing. It's like if you just imagine a person that works at Burger King being in charge of getting children pumped, like they're completely overmatched. They have no skills, no training. So these are not, they did not hire like, like these are not out of work actors who maybe have some like stage presence. These are like 18 year old kids.

Fast food employees. These are like 19 year old high school dropouts. Okay. Who've just been given the instruction, go. Yeah, get them pumped. Like this is not someone who's had some improv classes. Just give them a purple polo shirt with an embroidered

mouse on it. But one wonderful thing that did happen while I was there, which was that at one point, Chuck E. Cheese was approaching the birthday party table, but the kids were kind of distracted.

And the parents were kind of like, oh, Chuck E. Cheese is here. You know, Chuck E. Cheese is here. You guys want to play with Chuck E. Cheese or whatever? And my son Simon looked up and he said to his friends, he goes, hey, guys, let's go talk to that big rat. Okay. So that made it all worth it. That was great. When he said, hey, guys, let's go talk to that big rat. Okay. So that made it all worth it. That was great. When he said, hey, guys, let's go talk to that big rat.

Hey, when something momentous happens to you, like your child says, hey, guys, let's go talk to that big rat, we have you call us at our 206-9844-FUN telephone number. Did that sentence go in the order I was planning for it to go? No. Did I save it? Yes. 206-9844-FUN or email us at jjgoe at maximumfun.org. For momentous occasions, let's take our first call. Hey, Jordan, Jesse, and guest, and also hi, Brian.

I have a momentous occasion. I have a momentous occasion. I just got off the phone with my landlord, who is, I'm not going to guess what sort of Asian descent he is, but has a very thick accent, and I got off the phone with him, and it must be just kind of one of those things that you forget about, but as he was hanging up, he said, okay, bye, I love you. And I thought I should call you and tell you that.

Yeah, that's pretty cool. Keep it sleazy. And OK, bye. Oh, man. Do you think hanging out at Chuck E. Cheese's is sleazy like Sunday morning? Oh, totally. OK, cool. Yeah.

Do you think they have mimosas there? Oh, yeah, they should. I mean, I could see that happening. I could see, like, that being a new, you know, cute, cheeky, hipster brunch destination. I bet the mouse has some miniatures if you ask her nicely. Or like a little hip flask. Oh, yeah. A little Sunday fun day at Chuck E. Cheese. Yeah.

Keeping it sleek. Like, you got to know the code. Right. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you know, honestly, I think that would kind of work if they had an adults only like fun brunch at Chuck E. Cheese. I mean, I think, you know, video game bars are kind of a thing that's happening. Video game bars are opening up. I don't know what the game selection was like at Chuck E. Cheese.

Why specifically do you think you would go to Chuck E. Cheese rather than Dave and Buster's or Ground Control? I guess because it's yeah. If there's unlimited mimosas. Yeah. The animatronic band is playing Arcade Fire songs. Yeah. Or like I mean like Hall & Oates. Something like that people would think was like cute and funny.

I like Hall & Oates, Jordan. Me too. I don't think it's cute and funny. I like hollow notes, Jordan. Me too. I don't think it's cute and funny. I think it's kick-ass. Yeah. Well, some of it's pretty good. Some of it's cute and funny. But you know that song, Rich Girl?

Yeah. That's a fucking awesome song. But I'm saying if you're going in for that tone, they would probably- Sometimes Simon says, can we listen to the band with the one guy who sings and the one guy who plays guitar? That's hollowodotes. Yeah, because he saw the record cover. I don't know. I think that would work.

I think that's a new business model for Chuck E. Cheese. What time are they? Are they just open daytime? Like Chuck E. Cheese, if they're mostly going for the kid market, presumably don't have a kind of 7 to midnight shift. Oh, maybe that's better. Maybe Chuck E. Cheese after dark. Yeah, that's what's up. What do you. Maybe Chuck E. Cheese after dark. Yeah. That's what's up.

What do you get in there? You get hard liquor. Yeah. You get strippers. Hard A. Well, maybe it's the robots take off their clothes. You don't need to like get a whole new

set of employees. They still wear like pasties and stuff. You don't want it to be illegal. Yeah, no, no. A lot of places have really specific robot nudity rules.

Sure. Yeah. Well, in California you go that whole you can't have nudity and alcohol. Yeah. Right. I think in Portland, you go that whole, you can't have nudity on alcohol. Yeah. Right.

I think in Portland, the robots could be naked and they could serve hard A. But they have to be vegan. Right. Yeah. But this is a – they have to be vegan robots. They can't eat other robots. I like this. I don't know.

I think so. I think this is a new direction because, yeah, they do have – they probably have to close at seven or eight, right? Yeah. Do vegan robots not eat animal products or do they not eat metal? Yeah, they don't eat anything that comes from a robot. Yeah, so anything that's been produced by a robot. Oil.

Okay. Cool. Oh, wow, no oil. Anything that's leaked out of a robot. Oh, wow. This is rough. So they can't eat, like, the body panels of a car. Nope.

What else is made by a robot? And also no gluten either, but that's just because it gives them a rash. Right. They'd have to have iron supplements to make up for it. Did you know that it's inflammatory? Gluten is inflammatory. I've heard that. Yeah.

Let's take another call. Hey, JJ Goh. It's David from Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Momentous occasion. So, as I said, I'm from Milwaukee, which means it's winter, which means it's very cold. It's very snowy. It's very icy. Driving to work on the freeway, taps my brakes, and all of a sudden my car starts spinning.

360-degree spin on the freeway at around 40 miles per hour. The car next to me at the same time starts to spin. We spin around each other, come to a stop with his trunk about six inches from my driver's door. We look at each other. We wave. We drive away and I go to work. Have a great day. Beautiful wolves.

Yeah. That's so thrilling. It could have been directed by Olivier Megaton. You think we could get Olivier Megaton to direct an episode of the show? You think we could get Olivier Megaton to direct an episode of the show? You remember like in the 90s when shows would do a stunt by having a trendy director? You know, like how ER would get directed by Quentin Tarantino or something? Sure.

Can we get Megaton in here to direct an episode of this show? What do you think it would cost us? I mean, hopefully we'd do something he would do for like the prestige. Right. This is a very prestigious program. Yeah. Just like kind of up his visibility with like techie influencers. Yeah. Give him a good chance of getting on the cruise.

Yeah. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Probably wants to go on the MaxFunCon cruise. He's emailing me about the MaxFunCon cruise. Do you think I should email him back?

I haven't replied to any of his emails. Well, I mean, here's, let's... I should mention he's also sending dick pics.

How is the dick? Is it greasy? Does it look greasy? Looks mega, I'll tell you that. Does it look like it just wants to get his gulta back?

His dick has a very particular set of skills. Okay, so yeah, His dick has a very particular set of skills. Okay. So, yeah. Let's just – let's extend the offer. Like he's extended his dick. I don't know if he's on Twitter or something.

Maybe we can have everybody kind of get at him. Do you think he could get us Depardieu? I mean if he is Depardieu, as you have theorized, it probably wouldn't be that hard. Do you think he could be an actor-director? How many – did you read that thing? Sort of like a player-manager. Make sure if you do tweet him that you're tweeting like the Olivier Megaton who's directing now and not the one who directed in the 60s and 70s. Thank you.

That's Boog Megaton. Matt Kirshen, bringing it back! The Prestige. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan Chessie Go. Oh, hey there, everybody. I'm Guy Branum, and welcome to Pop Rocket, a new weekly show picking over the pop culture we all love to love. With me to talk TV, film, music, and anything else entertaining are journalist Margaret

Wappler, academic, writer, and DJ Oliver Wang, digital strategist Winner Mitchell, and comedian Santina Muha. It's an intellectual and incredibly snark-filled discussion about pop culture by five cranky Hollywood 30-somethings. No name-calling, no rudeness, just straight talk and a lot of role play. I'm only 30-something for another year. Me too. And I don't tell anybody I'm 30-something.

Pawpocket comes out every week from MaximumFun.org. La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la Jordan, Jesse Goebel. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Matt Kirshen, still here. Matt, it's been a joy to have you here. It's been a pleasure. Thank you so much for having me, and sorry I was walking between rooms in my house. Best of all, it gave us a little bit of extra time to hang out with Adam, our guest who you here. It's been a pleasure. Thank you so much for having me. And sorry I was walking between rooms in my house.

Best of all, it gave us a little bit of extra time to hang out with Adam, our guest who's here. Adam paid $10,000 to Smile Train in an auction. Brian's shaking his head no. $50,000. He's mouthing $50,000 to Smile Train, a wonderful charity in the podcast-a-thon auction to be a guest here at our show.

He's enjoyed taking a look around. He had one of the satsumas that Brian brought. So it just gave us some time to talk about him and his weird lifestyle where he lives in Mexico

but works in America. Okay. I'd pay. Just like Sammy Hagar. I bet, right? No, Sammy Hagar lives in America and works in Mexico. He works at the Cabo Lavo Cantina, right? I think Sammy Hagar lives in a blip that's constantly orbiting.

I can tell you for a fact he lives in Marin County. He does? And sometimes shows up at shows at the Throckmorton Theater. No, Sammy Hagar shows up at the Throckmorton? Yep. Because he thinks Dana Carby might be there. I think they're buddies. Does he like sit in with whatever band is playing? That I don't know. Okay.

But I've been at least one comedy show at the Throckmorton where... Wait, he's not stopping in to do comedy, is he? No, he's just to hang out and be Sammy Hagar. Oh, okay. What are you doing at the Throckmorton? Doing comedy. It's a great place to do. In Mill Valley?

You're just up there hanging out in Mill Valley, California? It's a great place to perform. What are you doing in Mill Valley? Shopping at the Banana Republic? Yes. Until I found out there was one in LA as well, and then I stopped going there. It's a little bit of a commute. I mean, to be fair, Mill Valley is where my mother-in-law lives.

Well, there you go. And it is where she saw Huey Lewis at Pete's Coffee once. Is that why they call it Nagtown? I'm sorry, Jesse's mother-in-law is probably lovely. This is a joke about the idea of mothers-in-law. Oh, I thought you were pointing out the fact that she's a female horse, which is true.

She is a horse. Oh, wow. Yeah, my wife is half horse huh also excellent pluralizing of mother-in-law there yeah mother's father is a zebra she's one of the zebra horse combinations mother-in-law like it's like courts martial yeah right sure oh mad kershen he's from a foreign country but he does voices let's have matt say something else in an American accent before we go. Oh, yeah. What's something else that's just quintessentially American?

Why not father? He might get me. We already talked about football. What else is there? Well, there's military aggression. How about that? How about this? How about this?

Can I get a side of ranch with that? Up top, dude. All right. Can I get a side of ranch with that? Up top, dude. Okay. okay now do it again but do do an american voice yeah that was pretty british that one you weren't even trying i was trying well i was trying not to over try okay let's do our credits here i'll give them to you one line at a time okay all right uh our producer is sunny d brian fernandez our producer is Sonny D. Brian Fernandez. Our producer is Sonny D. Brian Fernandez.

That's okay. It fell apart a little bit. It's kind of newsies. It's kind of newsies. Yeah, that's right. Our theme music is Love You by The Free Design. Our theme music is Love You by The Free Design. That's just my voice now, but deeper.

Now, Courtesy of the Free Design and light in the attic records. All right. Courtesy of the free design and light in the attic records. See, that's where it goes to a different region. Yeah, that's right. From Brooklyn. Jordan, can you do this next one in an American accent? I'll do it Liam Neeson doing an American accent.

Okay. You can join us on Reddit ateson doing an American accent. Okay. You can join us on Reddit at MaximumFun.Reddit.com. Yeah. You can join us online at MaximumFun.Reddit.com. Uh-huh. Yeah. That's right. In our forum at Forum.MaximumFun.org.

In our forum at MaximumFun.org slash forum. And don't forget to back Brian's Kickstarter for Brian and Lindsay will totally eat that. Yeah, I'm from Brooklyn. Back Brian's Kickstarter. Uh-huh. Yeah, that's right. And check out our new show, Pop Rocket. That one, too.

Give me back my daughter. That's it. We'll talk to you next time on Jordan, Jessica. Bye-bye. Maximumfun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned. I'm Jordan Jessica.