Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 516: The Tropical Itch with Ricky Carmona

Episode Date: January 30, 2018

Jordan and Jesse take a break from their usual topic to have a lively chat with comedian and podcaster Ricky Carmona.  They get into the weaponizing of cold brew coffee, the different cultures who may or may not pronounce the "l" in salmon, and the terrifying film set outside the office.  

Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you. It's Jordan Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Who was Billy the Kid and what was the story of his life? That's what every Jordan Jesse Goh episode is about. This week, alien? We'll get to the bottom of the theory that's blowing up Reddit.

Jordan, you left the subtitle out when you said the title of this week's episode. Subtitle is unlikely. Right. Sure, sure. I'm going to be Brian. I'll add that to the metadata. You know what? I also have been checking out Reddit slash R slash the kid.

Who was Billy the Kid. Yeah, who was Billy the Kid. I've been checking out some of the great posts there, and there were a ton of great posts. And I actually saw it was a cross post with R slash who was really an alien. Yeah. Cross post. Yeah, it was a cross post. And also with R slash hot wife.

Right. Like cuckoldry r slash hot wife. Right. Like cuckoldry without the shame element. Sure. Space cuckoldry. Cucks in space. There's no shame in space. So here's my thought. Yeah. The post on Reddit this week was so exhaust thought. Yeah.

The post on Reddit this week was so exhaustive, so extensive, so fantastic. And it also went into the fact that all of the Pixar films happen in the same universe. That was really like, I mean, it's a fun tangent. Yeah. But I don't, not exactly related. Yeah. I like to play six degrees of Tony Shalhoub. That's fun too. So there's a degrees of Tony Shalhoub. Sure.

That's fun, too. So there's a lot of fun things you can do out there. Anyway, here's my thought. We were going to cover the alien stuff on this week's program, but given how well covered

it was on Reddit... It would just be redundant. It would be us reading it. Yeah. I actually don't even... Maybe leaving out the Pixar stuff. You know, it's funny. Our show has that subreddit

on Reddit, and I don't even follow the darn thing. I just, it's funny. Our show has that subreddit on Reddit. I don't even follow the darn thing. I just ran into it in slash r slash hot wife. You seem to spend a lot of time on r slash hot wife. Yeah, well, you know, I got no shame. Sure, that's true. Got no shame.

Yeah. Got no shame. Up there in space. Yeah, so, okay. So, I mean, it seems like our topic this week has been pretty thoroughly torpedoed by the sleuths over at Reddit. Yeah. The amateur sleuths. Yeah, I love sleuths. Mm-hmm.

Professional and amateur. Sure. And pro-am. Right. Pro-am sleuths. You ever go down to the park and check out the pro-am sleuth league? Yeah. A lot of NBA players in there.

Yeah, look, I like to watch an NCAA gumshoe from time to time. So, Baron Davis is making a comeback in the Pro-Am Sleuth League. RC Pro-Am, of course. Nintendo game about racing remote control cars. Dude, that's a fucking dope game. It is good, yeah. Anyway. A little hard to control.

Here's my thinking. Well, you got to get knobby tires. Yeah. That's your problem. You didn't spend the money to get the knobby tires. And you know what? Getting knobby tires is also a good tip for hot wifing. Got to get those knobby tires for when you're giving it to a dude's hot wife.

Here's my thinking, Jordan. I say that instead of doing the Billy the Kid stuff this week, we take a week off and we just spend this week shooting the breeze. Because my friend Ricky Carmona is here this week. Great guy. And I don't think he's a big Billy the Kid head. So we could loop him in on a just kind of general fun chat. Maybe he hosts the Max Fun Film Podcast, Film Podcast, Pusatia,

and maybe he's got some film opinions he could share with us. Oh, that'll be fun. Or maybe we could just talk about Café Bustelo, his favorite kind of coffee that is the only subject of all of his social media posts. Let the record show that Ricky Carmona did some sort of coffee dance when that was brought up. Ricky, welcome to the show. Tell me about this coffee. It is a pleasure to be here.

I am a little disappointed in myself. I didn't have time to have a cup of coffee Bustelo today. But Café Bustelo is a Cuban coffee brand that I can't remember what the gentleman's name is. Fidel Castro. Thank you very much, Jesse. Started this little coffee shop. Pito Puente. I don't know why I said it in Italian. That was weird shop Pito Puente I don't know why I said it in Italian That was weird

Hey, Pito Puente Hey, it's me, Samuel Cruz Who wants some of my famous ragu? Let's go It's me, Willy Chirino I got the Bifaroni Café Bustelo was huge in New York, and then it just spread across the country from there. I mean, I watched my parents drink it growing up, and it was just – it was not Folgers or Senka in our house.

It was Café Bustelo, and you drink it, and it just has the power, bro, when you drink it. It just – you don't need a lot of it, man. You get one little cup in you during the day. It's one of those tiny cups that they drink in other countries. Oh, yes, sir. You know, I don't know if they use Café Bustelo in the coffee that I drink, but it is very, it's the little small coffee. You get your cortado.

You get your cafecito. You know, it's a little tiny one. It's called Chuchu, right? I love. I have a big tiny one. It's called Chicharito. I love it. I have a big-ass cup of it myself when I drink it. Your tolerance has increased. Yeah, very much so. Your Bustelo tolerance.

I feel like Bustelo and Luz sometimes. Chuck Brown and the Soul Searchers. Thank you, my man. So, Ricky, I think it is amazing that 65 years or whatever it is after the Cuban Revolution, Cuban Americans still have like 17 Cuban thing brands that somehow exist because they like brought the printing presses over on a boat when shit looked like it was going down. They're like, we've got to save iron beer. It's the recipe. Eat the recipe.

We'll dig it out of your leavings. It's exactly true. People will be like, well, how do you get it to taste so authentic? Well, we actually brought the only machine that makes this kind of coffee. We brought it over with us, and it was only used in this shop. So you either have to come to this shop to use it, or we will give you some form of fifth generation. You're not going to know all the ingredients. There's like seven ingredients.

We'll give you six, and then the seventh one is like our little – Figure it out. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I definitely am concerned about the strengthening of modern coffee. I'm a coffee drinker. I have a cup as we speak. Oh, yeah, you do. I love to start my day.

Sometimes if I need a little pep in the evening, I have a cup of coffee. But it seems like in the past five years, coffee is like weaponized. I feel like you have to be so careful with iced coffee. Yeah, because an iced coffee, you know, you know, it's a drink. It's a cup of coffee over ice. But if you say iced coffee and they give you a cold brew, you I would rather be in public on cocaine. I had to apologize at an office once because I ordered an iced coffee on the way in, got some sort of atomic cold brew fuck you blend from out of the back of a converted trolley uh actually and i got into work in like it was minutes it was a very affordable way to get a place to sell the coffee sure the main cost was laying the track to get it right exactly you know because you're at one place for lunch you're one place for breakfast it's's a whole thing. Yeah. And I had to apologize to the office.

I'm like, hey, I feel really weird, and I think you're all looking. I had too much coffee. I would rest in stone. Anyway, I feel like there should be a meter or something. Yeah, absolutely. You never know how it's going to affect you. Absolutely. And I actually, I'm not going to lie, I am a traditionalist. When it comes to my coffee, I don't go the iced coffee route.

If I'm going crazy, my crazy coffee drink. Yeah, tell us, what's it like when you're going crazy? I have a peppermint mocha from Starbucks. Oh, that sounds nice. That is my crazy, whoo, look at me, I'm a madman. No, not once a year year As many times as I can When I'm at Starbucks Oh so constantly

Yeah Wait Each time you're at Each time at Starbucks They're like Oh it's a seasonal drink Understood I see that you have a

Bottle of peppermint Right there though Right And I'm gonna order a mocha Now could you please Put that peppermint In the mocha No whipped cream

Boom we made it Wow That's what's up And you shut down Their fucking seasonal access. Well, I mean, I don't say like an asshole. You know, I'm very like... No, you're a sweet guy.

You know, I try to, but once... No, Ricky's kind of an asshole. Yeah, a little bit. As soon as they question, I'm like... Same as asshole, Ricky Carmona. Oh. I went and had coffee with a friend on Friday. And he was like, oh, look.

And it was called Latin something something ice cold brew, and I just started laughing right away. Like, there is no way. I know no Latinos who drink that drink right there. If I would explain to my mom, mom, it's coffee. It's cold. Don't freak out. Maybe it was a coffee.

Maybe it just means it was maybe in in Latin they mean like the dead language. Maybe that's what they were getting at. Six Semper Java. I don't know. It's the only Latin I know. They ordered it and I tried it. It was delicious. It was absolutely delicious.

But I had my little espresso. I had a cortadito, which is like your little tiny espresso-y coffee. And I was like, feeling great. Ricky, speaking of, fun situation. Recently, I ran into you at the grocery store. Yeah, we did. Oh, yes. I remember this.

And I love running into a friend at the grocery store. Oh, man. It's real fun. Highlight of the day. And then you see you talk, you leave. And then you see him later on, and you go, are you stalking me? Which is fun. I'm the first guy to ever do that. Congratulations, Joel.

Yeah, I've got that rolling. Is that how you got that medal? Mm-hmm. Okay. Is that solid gold? I'm the first guy to point out that Die Hard is a Christmas movie, so I got multiple medals for my many accomplishments. Look at that. We have you to thank for that.

Thank you for the diehard. No problem. Yeah, I'm just a clever guy. He knows a lot about movies. Flicks. I love them. I love flicks. I like to call them flicks.

I love flicks. Yeah. And when we were chatting, we were having a nice chat. I think you had just seen David Lynch. I had just seen David Lynch with my own eyes as I was crossing the street. I initially was cursing the person who was driving in this car because I was crossing the street and I could tell they wanted me to walk faster. And I was like, I'm taking my time. I'm crossing the street.

Now, when I got to the corner and was going to head in the other direction, I look in the passenger side. Who's sitting in the passenger seat? The one and only David Lynch, y'all. Oh, my God. Yes, sir. Lynchie's riding shotgun. And he could tell, like, my eyes lit up, and he could tell. So I gave him, like, the thumbs up.

This guy recognizes me. He, like, reached for his knees. Well, time to yogic fly away. Sure. So I was just, like, riding on a high from seeing like a huge smile on my face. I walk in my local Ralph's, the one and only. Jordan. Boom. And I remember being.

A twofer. It's one of those things where you don't, you know, usually when you run into somebody at a grocery store, you're not necessarily chatting about what you're buying. But you kind of, you know, you're aware of that the other person has stuff you're aware that you have stuff and that you know while you're chatting that you know you're gonna notice the stuff yeah i remember i don't know if you remember noticing this or not but when we were talking all i had in my cart was cat litter toilet paper and coffee so i think i walked away going like, does Ricky think I just buy shit items? Are all my items kind of related to shit in some way? And he's like, boy, Jordan sure buys a lot of shit items at his local Ralph's.

I think we may have covered this subject before on this show, but one of my core beliefs, if you will, is that there's- The earth is flat. There's no- You learned about it on r slash hot wife.'s... The earth is flat. There's no... You learned about it on r slash hot wife. Yeah. The earth's flat. The wife's not.

There is no combination of items in the fast lane at the grocery store that is not basically a poem about sadness. store that is not basically a poem about sadness. Any, yes, any 15 or less grouping of things always paints the picture of a bad life. Like you could be there, you could be just getting four candy bars. Sure. But what could be sadder than that? A person who's buying four candy bars and went to the grocery store for candy bars.

It doesn't matter what it is. Those were literally the happiest items I could think of. I think my all-time one, and I recognize this about myself, and I'm like, people are noticing this. Cat litter and tequila. Cat is there. Or sale baby shoes, never worn. That just shows you know how shoes Never worn That just shows You know how to party And you care enough

To help clean up That's true yeah I thought of bird seed And candles I see you with bird seed And candles I'm like oh I don't know

What ceremony You're preparing for But oh my Also The solstice is involved Somehow Also great grocery store Yeah

Like oh that's in our bird aisle Yeah Holstice is involved somehow. Also, great grocery store. Yeah, exactly. Like, oh, that's in our bird aisle. Yeah. I love that Ralph's myself. That's a good Ralph. I have reached the, well, I haven't reached the age. I'd say since I've lived here, which is seven years now, I love going to the grocery store. I'm all about it.

I take my time in there. I make my lists. When I'm like, you know what? We're going to spend some time. No preparation, Ricky. Let's just walk up and down the aisle and see what we want. Big fan. Salmon really came into my life this year, y'all.

Really? How are you preparing the salmon? You're eating it raw. I pick it up right there in the aisle and I just start chewing on it. I just chew on it. Ricky, I feel like you are the man to answer my top salmon preparation question. Oh, I will try and be. It's very simple what I do.

Very simple. Okay. You know the song, I believe it's in the song Broccoli. You know that song? By Drum? Yeah. Yes, I do. Yes, I do.

In that song, there's this part where he says, I'm eating, and it's a true, he's not an astonishingly brilliant lyricist generally, but this is a detail that has absolutely captured my heart, which is, I think it's in that song, he says, I'm eating salmon on a bagel on a square plate. That's like his example of how rich he is. And it is a perfect distillation of a particular idea of being rich.

I love it so much. It's like perfectly observed. However, I need to know what's going on with Kim saying salmon instead of salmon, because right after I started noticing this and being upset about it, we were at the Chicago podcast festival and I was backstage and I was hanging out with these nice guys who do a podcast exclusively about Kanye West and their guest on it was I want to say it was it was not GLC the knockout King it was the other guy that was friends with Kanye at the very very beginning it wasn't consequence it

was a big Sean no it's this is well pre big way before that yeah yeah this is okay anyway is this the Detection Podcast? Anyway, one of them brought the dinner in, and this guy is a Chicago guy, and he ordered salmon. And the guy said, who had the salmon? He raised his hand. I had the salmon. These guys are just saying it normal. They're not doing it normal.

No, they're not doing it at all. Not a bit. What is amazing about it is it's one of those pronunciations, like all vowels in Baltimore, that I can't even reproduce it because it seems so crazy to say. But they said it so fluidly as though everyone says salmon. Yeah. And you're a Chicagoan, so I want to say. But they said it so fluidly as though everyone says salmon. And you're a Chicagoan, so I want to know, are there pockets of salmon sayers around Chicago? In my household, it was said at home, it was salmon. That's how we say it. And then when I was in public amongst the people, I would say salmon.

Yeah. That's, I've, I, now. No insights. These weren't Spanish speakers. Chicagoans though, we, when I am not in Chicago, this is when I hear, hey, you guys notice that you say certain words like this? And I'm like, oh shit, I guess I didn't know that's how we pronounce it. I bet you there very much is a salmon population contingency. Ricky, let me ask you another stupid Chicago question.

I thought that's what I was here for. How do you feel about a Chicago-style deep dish pizza? Huge fan. Yeah, it's huge. They're amazing. Why is there a rivalry between these kinds of pizza? It's a forced rivalry, I believe. I, boy, I used to have,

I don't have energy for regional food arguments anymore. It's like, I would, yeah, I just don't have it. I don't either. It feels so, it does, it feels so artificial. Let me ask you, Jordan. Very much so. Is Chicago deep dish style pizza a sandwich? Oh, God. Yeah. Is Chicago deep dish style pizza a sandwich? Oh, God.

Yeah. Is it a beverage? Right. It's a Christmas movie. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. I feel like it is just these things that dudes do to each other. I don't know what it is.

It's just like I need to have a weird argument that starts out fun but gets mean. I know what it is because I recently interviewed Star Wars director Ryan Johnson on my podcast and have received numerous informative tweets. Oh, lots of good information in those. So many thoughtful, informative tweets about the movie Star Wars colon The Last Jedi. Yes. Yeah, it's like, those like those are like they start fun. They always start fun.

It's like I got this thing and we make it like this and you make it like this and it's different. Oh, you got to try it with this ranch dressing on pizza. Never. But then like 90 percent of dudes just get mean immediately and they get in your face. It's like, whoa, this is fun. This is about tacos versus burritos or something. But why are you being a dick?

I don't know. It's just like... I remember the first time... Yeah, deep dish pizza is like... That one has a weird propensity to get that way so quick. Who are the people opposed to that great... I'm not sure.

All pizza is good. It's the greatest food ever invented. That's what I don't understand. It's all delicious. And one of these has literally more deliciousness in it that you can enjoy. And here's the thing. The guy, the fighter, the dickhead. The dickhead who's doing that, he knows that.

I know he knows that. I know he knows that. And I'm not – yes. And he – yeah, it's a dude. It's always a dude. I'm sorry if I'm not saying they. It's he. It's always a dude.

It's a fucking guy. He's got suspenders. It's a thing. I've seen a lot of these fights go down on slash r slash hot wife. Yeah. Yeah. He knows that, but he's doing the, and anyway,

I can't. No. Yes. Chicago style deep dish is delicious. It's delicious. A New York slice. Is delicious. You fold it. Yeah.

Maybe you drip the grease. Maybe you don't. Also delicious. Papa John is delicious. Papa John. Ooh, taste that sweet shaft. I'll fight you.

I'll fight you about that. That sucks. Papa John pizza sucks. Taste that. No, I was talking about his donger. Oh, ooh that sweet shaft. I'll fight you about that. That's fine. Papa John's pizza sucks. Taste that. No, I was talking about his donger. Oh, ooh. I mean, when he dips that donger in garlic sauce. Oh, garlic butter sauce.

Come on now. Come on now. It's like a Christmas movie in your mouth. Oh, it's a mouthful of a Christmas movie. Oh, it's a beverage. Oh, yeah. Y'all didn't come here for this. Wait, so you have a simple salmon recipe. Here's, I...

What do you do? I mean, I put a little bit of coconut oil in my pan there. Let that heat up for a bit. Toast up a bagel. Toast up a bagel. We talked about this recently on the show. Coconut oil can also be used as a sexual lubricant. Go on. But you're not supposed

to use it for a sexual lubricant. Was that what we learned? We checked out at that point. We learned you oughtn't. Oh, okay. Anyway, I have some emails to write. I've done the very simple

sea salt. Crushed black pepper on each side, you know, turn it every five minutes until, like, you can see it's cooked. I've gone all in with rubbing ginger on there, some soy sauce, your lemon cracked pepper combo seasoning. You were talking earlier, saying about drawing with the square plate. Depending on what seasoning I use, if I'm just going simple salt and pepper, I have a nice round white plate that I like to use for it.

If I'm going in with the soy sauces and putting the lemon cracked pepper, I have a lovely kind of Latino floral plate that I use. I never put salmon on a square plate. The plate has somewhat of a race. Absolutely. Yes. It's not fully racinated.

No, no, no. I have a Cuba poster that hangs in my place. And when I'm using that floral plate, I like to look over once in a while and say yes i feel i feel like i'm back in the motherland by the way earlier when we were when we were saying we were cuban people in an italian accent and after i thought of celia cruz uh i couldn't like literally the only cuban person that i could get to come out of my head was former Florida Marlins first baseman Orestes Destrade. It was like all I could think of. Listen, if you know some famous Cubans, why don't you tweet up to at gas station TV. I was I am for as much as I'm all like woo woo woo cafe Bustelo.

I legit thought it was a Puerto Rican coffee. I just had the association cafe Bustelo. I legit thought it was a Puerto Rican coffee. I just had, I made the association, Café Bustelo, New York, Boricua, boom. As long as you know the difference between the sons, I think you're okay. One goes clonk, clonk, clonk, clonk, clonk, and one goes clonk. There's one that's on the four, and then I don't know what the other one's on But yeah you better Los ritmos Si si

Can I say something on the issue of corrections I would love something on the issue Of the corrections So of course the Jonathan Franzen Novel About a family I think it's been a while since I read it

so so usually we like to you know on this show we want people you know if they have corrections or you know thoughts on Star Wars The Last Jedi tweet them to at gas station TV

but and I don't I don't want to encourage people to correct me, but I think in this case I got something so wrong that I think it would be irresponsible not to bring it up. This is above and beyond the coconut oil thing. Yeah, which, I don't know, stick it wherever. I mean, there are so many people walking around right now jordan jesse go listeners right coconut butthole yeah sure the old tropical itch they've got penile husking. Sure, right.

We were talking, I think it was with our buddy Kevin Avery. Yes. I think someone had written in with the question about the worst thing we've ever seen in a movie. Okay. And Ricky is a guy who hosts a film podcast. If you have something on this topic, please share. I have something on Billy the Kid that you guys were mentioning earlier. Sorry, not this week. Sorry, not this week.

Cancel it. Okay, my apologies. Is it about Bill Ted's Excellent Adventure? No, it was Young Guns. I love the Young Guns. That's it. That's all I have on it. That's all I have on it.

Young Guns holds up. Call it into the hotline. Oh, I will. Okay, thank you. Thank you. And I said one of the worst things I've seen in movies is Van Wilder. Have you seen the movie Van Wilder? I have not seen the movie Van Wilder.

It's a college shenanigans movie. Yes. That has an evil frat. Okay. You know, classic kind of waspy evil frat guy. Sure. led by Van Wilder does a prank on them where they make a dog cum inside

donuts and then the evil frat guys eat it up in this scene that is like where they are eating it with a zeal to where if they weren't eating cum it would be weird. It's weirder because they're eating cum but it's if you just saw someone

eating like I think the fact that the would be weird. It's weirder because they're eating cum, but it's, if you just saw someone eating like, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom. I think the fact that the cum is there is like, well, you could imagine seeing someone really going to town

on some cum. I know what's up, right? I believe there's a genre dedicated to this. Not everybody, but I think a lot of people. You know, there's a fair few who would really.

Like a sauce from Tito Puente. Buona sera. But so these guys, and I hope I'm not coming off like I'm shaming cum eater. This isn't a cum cum. If you knowingly want to eat cum like that, God bless you. By all means. God bless you. Go to town.

But I'm saying in the context of this movie where there's supposed to be- Nothing bad's going to happen because you're eating that cum. It's not like you're putting coconut oil in your- on now oh boy oh boy um anyway um and i penile husking penile husking penile husking over there on r slash hot wiping backslash penile husking. They just added the penile husking flair over there. Yeah. I don't really know how Reddit works. Anyway.

Neither do I. It's hard to say. It's a goose. I've been plugging and posting in our Reddit for six years. No idea. I'm a moderator on multiple Reddits I think I don't know how it works um and I said that I was grossed out by this scene where the

frat guys eat donuts filled with dog cum I got a text from a listener who's also a friend oh boy this is hard this is hard to say this that I fucked up so bad take your time the dog didn't actually

come inside donuts he came inside of eclairs oh wow I don't know if I'll ever be able to get your trust back again but now I'm just dedicating myself to listening and yeah

and I think that and I think just I want to heal and I want to try and just undo some of the damage that I've done. Hashtag not all pastries. Hashtag not all pastries. Man, Jordan, I got to say, if I turn, and you know, it's been a while since I've seen Van Wilder, but if I turn it on tonight, because, I mean, I do watch it nightly. Sure. It's late afternoon as we record this.

When I turn it on, if I see that it's, for example, a cream puff, if I see a beard pop a bag there, I'm going to be very upset. You know, beer pop is a depilile husking. I'm very upset. You know, Beard Papa's into penile husking. Does our cream puff store sound like a weird fetish?

Says one Beard Papa executive to the other. The other says, yes, we're Japanese people. Oh. Yeah. I didn't know that. I believe it's a Japanese store. Beard Papa. I believe it's a Japanese store. Anyway,'s a Japanese anyway so I just wanted to apologize again

I accept your apology absolutely you're taking it seems like you're going to take the time to reflect now me and David Lynch are going to get together at his meditation compound man I used to get so many press releases

from this nice woman at his uh transcendental meditation cult uh he has a record label he makes music to do tm with okay and at one point he was trying to get together this woman was so nice she would she like she basically was ready to book him on my show this was maybe eight years ago. And only the fact that I would have had to talk about yogic flying kept me from... At one point, the main thing he was doing, he had set aside his career as a legendary filmmaker to focus on getting so many people to meditate at the same time that everyone on earth levitates. I mean, that's what's up right there.

Yeah. That's what's up. I think that's what's up. That's the guy. That's the guy I want to spend time with. You're financially sound. Your status as a legend has been cemented. Why not dedicate more time to flying?

Right? To get the whole world to fly. Because what is he going to do that surpassed what he's done already? I'd like to teach the time to flying. Right? To get the whole world to fly. Because what is he going to do that's surpassed what he's done already? I'd like to teach the world to sing. Sure. I mean, just throwing out ideas here. Yeah, that would be nice. But that's a me, a Sally, a Cruz.

Or estes a destrada was a disappointment with the Marlins. Okay, we'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jessica. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,ff and host of the Maximum Fun podcast, Switchblade Sisters. Do you love genre films? Do you love female filmmakers? Do you love discussions on craft? If your answer is yes, you'll love Switchblade Sisters. Every episode, I invite one female filmmaker on and we talk in depth about their fave genre film and how it influenced their own work. So we're talking horror, action, sci-fi, fantasy, bizarro, and exploitation cinema. Mothers, lock up your sons because the Switchblade Sisters

are coming for you. Available at MaximumFun.org or wherever you find your podcasts. It's Jordan, Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's Radio Sweetheart. Jordan Morris, Boy Detective., la, la. It's Jordan, Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Ricky Carmona. You've been on the show.

You know how to come up with that nickname. How many times have you been on the show? Like three or four times, Ricky? You don't have a fucking nickname? I'm sorry, guys. I was going against the grain there. No, I get it. I was going against the grain. My bad. I get it. I was going against the grain.

My bad. You're a rabble rouser. My bad. Billy the Kid. Who will we be talking about next week? Oh, I've got some Young Guns. I've got more Young Guns stuff. I saw Young Guns 2.

This is an outrage. I didn't know there was a Young Guns 2. Oh, there is a Young Guns 2. Wait, hold on. I want to hear about Young Guns 2. Okay. We have some ads. Right.

Let's get that out of the way. Sure. And then hot Young Guns 2 ads. Right. Let's get that out of the way. Sure. And then hot young guns to chat. Okay. Who, of course, every week we're grateful to everybody who goes to MaximumFun.org slash donate and supports us. Yes. Who else is on the docket this week? We got Audible.

Jordan Jessigo is supported in part by Audible. With an unmatched selection of audio book and spoken word audio products, Audible is the Internet's leading provider of spoken word entertainment. Audio books are great for helping you be a better you, whether you want to feel healthier, get motivated, or learn something new. Jordan, Jesse, go. Listeners might enjoy... Vacationland by John Hodgman. Jesse, look what I had just looked up on my Audible app.

Vacationland by John Hodgman. I saw it on the passenger seat of your car the other day when I parked next to you. Oh, nice. It's a great book, right? It's terrific. But here's the thing. I'm reading this Vacation Land by John Hodgman. It's great.

It's funny. It's insightful. It's emotional. Cleverly written. Yep. I'm trying to read this thing at the fucking big boy. I got my vacation land out at the big boy. Who's big boy, Bob?

Bob's big boy. That's the one. And I'm getting stuff all over my vacation land. I'm having to, you know, the guys come, do you want some more water? And I'm having to put the thing down, fold the page. I was thinking to myself, if I was just listening to this vacation land, I could easily navigate my sandwich at the Big Boy better. And also, you would have John Hodgman's hilarious inflection.

Yeah. Audible's offering our listeners a free 30-day trial membership. Get a free audio book with a 30-day trial today by signing up. Go to audible.com slash jjgo. That's audible.com slash jjgo. Or text jjgo to 500-com slash JJGo. That's audible.com slash JJGo. Or text JJGo to 500-500 to get started. We also got a nice support message from the folks at ZipRecruiter. Jordan, I'm a small business owner and I do a lot of hiring.

Looking for your next great hire but you're short on time? You just need the right tools. Smarter tools. ZipRecruiter posts your job to over 100 job boards with just one click. Click. Then they actively look for the most qualified candidates and invite them to apply. No wonder 80% of employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site in just one day. Zip Recruiter, the smartest way to hire right now.

Listeners can post jobs on Zip Recruiter for free. That's right, free. Go to ziprecruiter.com slash JJGo. That's ziprecruiter.com slash JJGo. I wanted to enunciate more on that one. If you want to advertise on Jordan, Jesse, go hit up Teresa at MaximumFun.org. Or if you want to get up on our Jumbotron and share a message with the world, go to MaximumFun.org slash Jumbotron and we will make it happen for you. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse, go. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you.

Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you.

Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Love you. Hey, this is Griffin McElroy. Hi, this is Rachel McElroy.

And we've got a new podcast on Maximum Fun called Wonderful. Wonderful. It's an enthusiast podcast where we talk about things that we're excited about and things that you're excited about. Things like overalls. 24-hour Sudafed. The grand prize game. The fact that wombats use their butts to kill predators. The soundtrack to the movie Dick Tracy.

The beach potion we call Bud Lightline. All these things and more every Wednesday. And we'll also talk about things that you're excited about. You can find us on MaximumFun.org or iTunes or wherever. I don't know. Just search Wonderful. Google it. You'll probably get there.

It's Jordan, Jesse Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. It's Jordan Jesse Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Ricky Carmona, the one who has no cool name. Oh, come on. I mean, isn't that in and of itself kind of a cool name? Thank you. I was trying to be humble.

Bitch, be humble. All right. Don't call me bitch. I'm sorry. It's a term of endearment in the hip-hop community, Jordan. Thank you. As someone from the flamenco community. I will answer with castanets.

I don't know if that's a flamenco song. That's not a flamenco song. That's the song that all the women in seven-inch heels with a rose in their mouth do. Yeah. Anyway. Okay. Who knows what anything is? Can we address the elephant in our room here?

It's that, okay, so I've lived in Los Angeles a long time. I know that movies aren't real. Sure. Sure. However, today. But you did I know that movies aren't real. Sure. Sure. However, today. But you did not know that until you moved here, right? Of course not. Yeah.

Not when I lived in flyover country. Sure. As I now call it dismissively. Referring to San Francisco, by the way. You're flying over on your way to Canada. Yeah. Here's the thing. I love that.

Oh, Vancouver, the Hollywood of the North. Of course, sure. I'm working on Battlestar Galactica. Yes. That's a pretty outdated Vancouver show reference. Yeah. What's a show that's currently on television? Arrow.

Arrow. Yeah. Arrow. There we go. There you go. So, okay. So, look, I know that movies aren't real. I've lived in Los Angeles for 10 years.

I'm used to productions happening on the street. I know that you don't have to do anything a production assistant tells you. And, in fact, you shouldn't do anything a production assistant tells you. You should do whatever you can to mess up other people's work days. So you do what the line producer tells you. Exactly. Well, they control, tell them. Exactly. Well, they control the purse strings. Sure.

However, today, and because we are right on MacArthur Park, a famous place in Los Angeles and a great film location, innumerable films and things, I'm used to our street being shut down for filming. We all love that scene from Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Bang, where they run over a hot dog cart. The guy who was working the hot dog cart just takes out a gun and starts shooting at them. Yeah. So today, and I don't know if this was your experience, but as I was coming down Wilshire

Boulevard, the great artery of Los Angeles, and getting ready to turn in, I noticed that the street was blocked off for production. And now I know, as in Angelino, that you can just turn in and just drive. And eventually, the closer you get to the, what do you call those, safety cones? Not safety cones, the like sandwich board things. The barricades, yeah. The barricades. By the time you get there, someone will have removed them for you, presuming that you're allowed to be there. But as I turned or as I approached the corner, I saw a giant sign that said, filming only, nothing here is real.

And then I'm like, what does that mean? Are they making explosion sounds or something? Because usually it's like to assure people that it's not a real crime taking place or something. I turned around the corner and there are the fucking Charlottesville protesters. Yeah. It was the most terrifying thing I've ever seen in my life. It is. Yeah, it was.

It's a group of guys dressed in like khakis and polos holding tiki torches and Pepe signs. Yep. Yeah. And they're chanting the thing, the like, you won't replace us or whatever it is. Oh, boy. It was so distressing. I saw them. I saw them.

Saw all the lights. Didn't see the sign that said it was all actors. I was just like, look at these brave souls. Wow. Wow. Of all the places to stage your alt-right protest. Look at you guys. Well, we chose to live here, Ricky.

High difficulty level. High difficulty level for your alt-right protest. You know, I think there are a lot of first generation Guatemalan Americans who really get the film industry, how it works, and totally understand that this is probably a cutaway for Samantha Bee. Yeah. Makes sense. Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. Hard to say what this thing is.

If anybody, any eagle-eyed spotters out there are watching TV in the coming weeks and noticed a protest shot that looks like it's in MacArthur Park, please let us know because I think we're all curious as to what the fuck this is for. The most upsetting part of it to me, I think, was as soon as I – because I had seen the sign first, it was work, but I was able to be in my head head it's just a movie it's just a movie it's just a movie don't start beating these guys up but then there was no one else it was only that it's just that there's no i want to see i want to see don cheetle punch one of them get cheetle in here in the war machine armor to start punching. Oh, you know, actually, this is – so I don't know why we're arguing about this. All of this is actually public record. You have to, like, you know, go in for the permits and stuff like this. Oh, right, yeah. So I think if I actually just, like, log on here to, like, the City of L.A. website, I can probably –

Okay, so definitely actually take out your phone so that you can – So this is actually not a bit – I just want you guys to know that I'm looking at going to the City of LA website. You really do have your phone in your hand. I can tell. Oh, Kevin can wait. Oh, okay. You're taking a turn this season.

What's crazy is that they had actually already planned this shoot for that canceled Tim Allen sitcom. Last Man Standing? They decided they'd shoot it anyway. Yeah, they'd shoot it anyway, and then they'd license the film. Right, right. You know, all the shows that needed it. So Roger Corman. To Kevin Can Wait.

Sure. To Rob Corddry's Netflix show. Yeah. Mom on CBS. Alice and Jannie requested it personally. Hey, when Jannie comes a-calling. Yeah. I'm not gonna tell them that. So, okay. So, Ricky,

I know Young Guns as a popular college dorm poster movie. What? Really? Yeah. Right? Young Guns? No. Young Guns. You're thinking of Scarface. Well, I mean, in the pantheon of Scarface. I mean, yes, Scarface is the ultimate college dorm movie poster,

but I think below Scarface you have... Dead Presidents. Dead Presidents. Pulp Fiction. You have Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Pulp Fiction, of course. But I think there is a strata of college posters that includes Young Guns. This is new knowledge to me, and i i am not denying it

i don't know i'm unaware of this at all i didn't even think young guns has poster culture credit you know that it even like broke into that world yeah um i mean could just been could have just been my particular dorm floor which is is also Jesse's dorm floor. Do you remember Young Guns posters? I definitely do not remember Young Guns posters. I remember, I feel like I remember one time when our friend Jim had group sex. But besides that, I don't remember. Yeah. We just called him Young Guns after that. I had a Wisdom poster, which was another Emilio Estevez joint. I had a – What? Yeah. No one's ever said Emilio Estevez joint before.

You just heard it. Did you just have a bunch of posters that you had like scavenged, that you had scavenged like a Dickensian street child from behind the video store? I would go to the video store and they would give them to me. Like the video store owners, they just knew that I loved movies. And they would be like, take this, take that. They'd save you anything, Estevez. I had a Wisdom poster. I had a Maximum Overdrive poster.

Oh, cool. And then that one was cool because they had like the cool truck. And then like just like random poster. What's the like the soccer movie? Lady Bugs? I think it was just called like Victory. Ben did like Beckham. Michael Caine and like Sylvester Stallone.

Wow. Yeah. There's a Michael Caine, Sylvester Stallone soccer movie? Pretty sure, sir. And I'm pretty sure it's called Victory. I bet it's great. I had that poster because I was just like, sir. And I'm pretty sure it's called Victory. I bet it's great. I had that poster because I was just like,

I can, why wouldn't I? What are you talking about why? Why wouldn't I have movie posters? No, Michael Caine plays Payler. Pay, oh. No, I got a speed from our local video store.

Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. Now, I'm not here to brag. Okay. I had a Demolition Man mini poster. Whoa, cool. I got that from my local Burger King. Yes. Now, I'm not here to brag. Okay. I had a Demolition Man mini poster. Whoa. Cool. I got that from my local Burger King.

Right. Taco Bell? It might have been Taco Bell. That's a natural tie-in because in the world of Demolition Man, all restaurants are Taco Bell. All restaurants are. They won the franchise wars. Ah. Now, when you watch Demolition Man.

It's a very funny movie. When you watch Demolition Man on HBO, I don't know if any kind of rights have changed. I watch it with closed caption, and any time they say Taco Bell, it says Burger King. What freaked me out, dude. The first time I was like, did they just not get it right throughout the whole movie? Any time it's Taco Bell, the caption says Burger King. Sounds like, I don't mean to quote my friends over at Reddit, but somebody took the yellow pill. Oh.

That's Nuprin. Maybe it's a thing where there's certain countries don't have Taco Bell, so for that gag to work in, you know, Canada or something, they have to change it to Burger King. Sure. Canada's a perfect example of a country. Yeah. Let's say Canada. Brothers to the north.

Yeah. I love them. Home of Rush. When something momentous happens to you. Oh, wait, hold on. But there's Young Guns 2, right? Young Guns 2. Young Guns 2.

Thank you, Jordan. Young Guns 2, which continues the story of Billy the Kid, brings back – in Young Guns 2, we only get back Lou Diamond Phillips and Kiefer Sutherland. Everybody else, I believe, the rest of the cast either got killed in the first Young Guns or did not want to come back. But we're also introduced to Christian Slater in Young Guns 2. The youngest gun. Chicago legend actor William Peterson is all up in Young Guns 2.

And this is the end of Billy the Kid's story. They wrap it up. That's interesting given that the subtitle was in Jordan, this is for Ricky, not you. Can't stop, won't stop. Young Guns. Signature hit.

The fact that there are multiple Young Guns movies reminds me that there are multiple tremors. Oh, yeah. I will have these moments where I feel like my life does not mean anything, where I am like, maybe I'll watch all the tremors. There's like five tremors. There's five tremors. And I think there's a Tremors TV show, if I'm not mistaken. There's a Tremors. Oh, yeah.

There is a Tremors TV. Yeah, it was on an early sci-fi network. Yes, that is correct. That is correct. Michael Gross came back for that. He was like, I'll keep making a Tremors paper. Oh, Gross will be in any – He will.

Yeah. He's ready to go. He actually played Pele in – No, he didn't really. I was not a fan of – there was kind of like – young guns happen, young guns too happen. And Hollywood was like, so they need, America wants young cowboys. Right. And then there was like that ABC show, which was like Wild Outlaws or some shit, and that

was horrible. Like, mm-mm, not feeling that at all. No. America's old cowboys. That's what we want. That's what he wants. Thank you. Then Unforgiven came along.

Yeah. I don't know if Young Guns came before or after Unforgiven. Gas Station TV, that's who you want to tell that to. Anyway. Unforgiven is a later post-Young Guns and Young Guns 2. Sure. You know what my favorite Western is? Sleepless in Seattle.

What? What? What? What? It's also my favorite Christmas movie. What? What? What? What? It's also my favorite Christmas movie. What? And my favorite sandwich. Wow.

Wow. Oh, no. Ricky, Jordan turned into a cat. Get some milk in here, quick. We need milk in here instead. Wow. Oh, that's okay, little milky baby. Little milky baby. Little milky baby.

Shout out to my DJ, little milky baby. R slash hot wife. Can I mention, by the way, that I don't meet Dick. I'm just a little milky baby looking for my beard papa. Rapper Lil Uzi Vert. way that like i don't i don't mean i'm just a little milky baby looking for my beard papa rapper lil uzi vert went to the grammys right wearing uh like i don't know what these kind of pants are called but they're like jean coat jeans but they're made of black nylon and they have a lot of like uh bondage chains on them okay and you would definitely wear them to all the same events as you would wear jean coat jeans too but you would also wear them to the nine inch nails concert i saw some memin of this yeah before i left the

house it was astonishing it was an astonishing choice i don't have anything further to say other than maybe it's possible he thought he was going to the gathering of the juggalos. Possible. Okay, when something momentous happens to you, like you wear your jean coats to the Grammys. Always. Give us a call at 206-984-4FUN. 206-984-4. How's fun spelled, Jordan?

F-U-N. You got it. Hey, what's up? Jordan Jesse. This is Joe from Portland calling in a momentous occasion. After getting my colon, part of my colon removed last year and having an ostomy bag for a year, I just got out of surgery and my ostomy bag is off. It's fucking tight.

Got recovery to do. But I think 2018 is going to be a lot less shitty. Thank you guys for the show and keep the heart of the rock and wet of the river. Catch you later. That's what's up. Shout out to this dude in the big boy potty. Fuck that bag, baby.

Now, did he clarify that he had been repaired, or did they just get rid of the bag and just let it go? They're like, listen, man, you're just going to start shitting wherever. Let it go. Let it go. You're just a little milky baby. Come on, now.

A little chocolate milky baby. You're gross. I'm sorry. Somehow you really upped the ante on how gross little milky baby is. Chocolate milky baby. Chocolate mil Baby is. Chocolate Milky Baby. Wow. Going in the big boy potty. Don't care for it.

I do not like it. As the Scots would say. Let's take another call. Hi, Jordan and Jesse. I am a huge fan and I am so excited that I have a moment of occasion that I think you guys are going to love. I just sold my first pair of used panties. I met a gentleman at the North Hollywood Metro Station. I gave him my used panties, and he gave me a nice crisp $100 bill.

So I think I found my new side hustle. All right. I'm going to go celebrate by keeping Analogous going all 2018. Thanks, you guys. Love you. Can I have a ride to the North Hollywood Metro Station after this? I don't know if anybody's going that way. It's right there off the 170.

That's why they call it the arts district. That's right. Used panties really is an amazing business. Yeah. You have to market them, right? Sure. I mean, I think there's maybe like a Craigslist culture around it. I'm sure there is.

I'm sure there is. I think there's maybe like a Craigslist culture around it. I'm sure there is. I'm sure there is. I read the – our buddy Dory Shafrir wrote that book that had the used panties subplot, and I feel like I learned a lot about the used panty market from that. Book Startup. It's really good. Yeah, and I think from the plot in that book, it sounds like there's a Craigslist type.

That's where it starts. It starts on Craigslist type. That's where it starts. It starts on Craigslist and it goes from there. Okay. Well, I know that there are some – I think it's almost exclusively dudes who buy dudes jockstraps. I don't think that anyone, even if I had occasion to wear a jockstrap, which actually I did for a while after my reproductive surgery. Okay. I don't think anyone's buying my jockstrap. I mean, I think if you – I mean, obviously, this person did something unusual. They did a hand drop.

A hand-to-hand, a panty to grubby little mitt, to nasty little mitt, hand-off. There you go, you little milky boy. There you go, you little milky baby. Just num-nums. But I mean, I think it seems like this can happen through the mail,

and I think that, you know, if you wanted to go into the jockstrap selling business, I mean, you could present however you wanted to. Right. On Craigslist. You know, you could find a nice. Should I try just catfishing? Yeah. I mean, straight up catfishing.

So that's what you do. You describe yourself and then you find a picture on the Internet. Maybe the I don't know, the logo from Beard Papa. This is me. i'm a cream puff sailor i i have tried catfishing i haven't gotten it to work yet i think i just need to sort of redouble my efforts um do you guys mind if i read the bio that i wrote because i made a fake you would i mean i put it i'm gonna take going to take out your phone. I can tell you're doing it because you took your phone out. Yeah.

I got to, I'm just looking it up here on my real phone. Yeah. You're really doing it. So I just wrote, I'm a freshwater or marine fish with whisker-like barbells around my mouth, typically bottom dwelling. You may know me as a wolf-fish. Just add shaved and discreet, and I think you're fine. No, I did have 420 friendly there. 420 friendly catfish.

Here for NSA oaky noodling. Wait, what? Oaky noodling is when the Oklahoma people will dunk their hand in the river and pull out the catfish. Oh, that's called oaky noodling? Oakley noodling, I think. Oakley noodling. And then what does the National Security Administration have to do with that? No strings attached.

No strings attached, oaky noodling. Do you, like, mesaky noodling. Do you like mesmerize the fish when you do that? Or... No, I think it's just pure power. It's the power of your Oklahoma mitt. It's one of those things where you just take your hand and pound a rock at the creek

side and all the fish flop up out of the water and land on the little rock beach there. Yeah. Anyway, if anybody wants to buy my used jock straps, I'll be up there at the big boy. The other day- I usually sit at the counter. The other day I- Just ask for the big boy.

They'll know. They know what it is. They'll know. The other day I had my most auspicious achievement as a parent, and I've been a parent now for six and a half years. Sure. Congratulations. Thank you very much. i'm quitting next year get my pension and get out of there um i i had uh both of my older children uh were with me as

theresa went to do one bad mother at Sketch Fest, her smash hit parenting podcast that everyone should subscribe to. And so I had the four-year-old and the six-year-old. Six-year-old falls asleep instantly. She sleeps like a rock. She's basically inconvenienced by being awake at any given time. But the four-year-old would not go to sleep and was totally distraught that his mother wasn't there, which I understand.

I like her too. But he's crying and screaming. And I just started going, everything's okay. Everything's okay. Everything's going to be fine. Everything's going to be fine. Mommy's coming home tomorrow. Let's just rest.

We're going to close our – And I fucking mesmerized him. Sure, yeah. He just got a fucking glassy look in his eyes. I controlled his brain and shut it down. Nice. You have a swirling coin, though, too, right? You have a coin with a swirling... That's just spinning.

Yeah. Yeah. And I have those robes. Sure, yeah. Glittering robes. Yeah. And I have those robes. Sure, yeah. Those glittering robes. Yeah. Okay, if you have a momentous occasion for us, 206-984-4FUN or JJGO at MaximumFun.org. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse, Go.

It's Jordan, Jesse, Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morse, boy detective. Ricky Carmona, it's your boy in your ear holes. Yeah. Now he's bringing the heat at the fucking end of the show. That's what I thought Ricky would be bringing right from the start of the show. And he's gotten it backwards.

I like variety. I like to change it up. You know, be like, oh, shit, you're expecting this. But then I come at you with the other one. Yeah, you sure do. He does. He does. He does come at you with the other one. Yeah, you sure do. He does. He does. He does come at you with the other one.

Yeah, I was expecting this. But then the other one. But then the other one shows up. Goodness gracious. I thought it was Puerto Rican the whole time. Confused as an Oklahoma catfish. Aspirized. Ricky, how are things going at Who Shot You?

What's been going on over there with Alonso Duralde and April Wolf? It has been going very well. I feel like with the show, I feel like we're hitting our groove, man. We're finally like when I – here's what was happening at first is I try and get everything I want to say in just like one word. And we talk about a movie and I'm like, I love this movie because it does this thing. And then Alonzo and April, they're professional goddamn film critics. They're smarter than we are. They are so much smarter than I am.

They're very smart people. So they look at me and they go, that's very interesting. This is how you behave. And then they give their amazing commentary, and it's great. But now I feel like they've finally, like, I have broken through to them, and they have broken through to me. Oh, man, I feel like we're speaking the same language. Chatting about blockbusters, indies.

All of it, yo, all of it. Prestige picks. Awards season? Oh, we're talking about it. We're not afraid of it. Yeah. We have occasion. We're not a- Award season? Well, we're talking about it. We're not afraid of it. Yeah. We have occasionally, we have Drea Clark. She is becoming a listener favorite on the show.

So we have her coming in more on the regular. We just talked about, last episode, we talked about Phantom Thread. And I brought a boomerang. As one does. As one does. Young Guns 2. Young Guns 2. Young Guns 2. And R.C. Pro-Am 2.

Right. The entire P.T. Anderson filmography. And I consider R.C. Pro-Am to be a film. Absolutely. I was talking about R.C. Pro-Am 2. No. I don't consider that a film. Okay.

I consider that an abomination. Chicago deep dish pizza. Come on. Fucking that's not pizza. I consider it an abomination. Like a Chicago deep dish pizza. Come on. Fucking, that's not pizza. I consider it a beverage. Right. Ricky, one of the reasons that we had to get you in here is that I have been enjoying the show so much. Of course, I'm one of the hosts of Jordan, Jesse, Go.

So I have a lot of say in who gets booked on the program. So I've been enjoying who shot you so much. We get a Ricky back in here. Get him in here. Now that he's a film expert. Well, you like, you like Star Wars, right? I did like Star Wars. Thank God.

I did. These people who didn't like Star Wars are tweeting at me. Why didn't you talk to Ryan Johnson about the the ferengis blasted into space mode why didn't they do this and that and this and that and that like i don't know because i wanted to talk to him about art making a fun movie that he made yeah i had issues with star wars you know what's happening is the people who have like these crazy gripes with Star Wars or what have you, they are so loud and so vocal and so, ah, that those of us who just have legitimate, like, oh, I had this problem with the movie, but I still liked it, or, oh, I want to know why they did that. We are no longer – our voice is diminished right now. Ricky just hates Laura Dern. He's against anything Laura Dern.

No Dern. I have been down with Laura Dern for a minute, y'all. Ricky's down with Dern. I am suspect of all these new people. Have you heard his other movie podcast, Go Dern It? I remember you were also one of the hosts of the Wham Bam Pow movie podcast. And I remember I got to come on that show and talk about Jurassic World. Thank you.

And if there's one thing I remember from that show, which was a blast, was that Ricky loves Dern. Thank you. Ricky loves Dern. Thank you. You know what I'm saying? So all these new people. She does it all. Action, drama, get Dern.

Come on now. Get on. Baron Davis. Baron Davis, get derned. Come on now. Baron Davis. Baron Davis. What's that? Come on now. It's a basketball star she was dating recently. Oh, I remember that. That was fun.

Yeah. I date him too. He came in here to do bullseye. I date that motherfucker. He's a fucking dreamboat. The guy is a dreamboat. He's just a big ball of charisma and good looks. Cool.

Yeah. Yeah. I'm very excited about – oh, that's what I was saying. So we talked about – the last episode we watched Phantom Thread, talked about that. And then we talked about film fashion, which is why I brought up Boomerang because that movie is like black excellence, yo. Like the people wearing that movie is on point. And then April brought up Rosie O'Donnell and her look in White Men

Can't Jump. And the reason I'm bringing that up is because I've been so disappointed in myself that we're talking about Rosie O'Donnell and I didn't give a shout out to her red dress during the credits of Do the Right Thing is on point. It looks like she bought that dress at Discovery. Can I ask

you a question? Are you sure we're talking about Rosie O'Donnell? Rosie Perez? What did I say? Rosie O'Donnell? I'm like, what did Rosie O'Donnell wear in White Man's Day? I know, me too. I'm like, I don't remember that part. See, this is why you should never have me in the show again.

You know where Rosie looked good? A league of their own. Rosie looked great in that movie. Really filled out that baseball uniform. Filled out that Peaches uniform. I said, Rosie O'Donnell, this is going to ruin me the rest of the week. So there's a video of Rosie Perez. And I don't know if you've seen this.

She was a soul train dancer before she was a famous celebrity. And she was like 20 or something like she was very very young she was a soul train dancer because she was fucking popping off in in all the freestyle clubs i guess and when she moved to la or whatever and um there is a montage of all of her dancing on Soul Train. And I don't think I have ever been as aroused by anything in my

life as this video. There's no nudity. And I was not expecting it. I just wanted to see, I was like, well, Rosie Perez is a dancer. I want to watch Rosie Perez dance. We know about that do the right thing dancing. I just wanted to see either like, well, Rosie Perez is a dancer. Like, I want to watch Rosie Perez dance, you know? Yep.

I mean, there's, we know about that do the right thing dancing. But like, really, I was just like, yeah, this sounds fun. I thought it would be a fun, like watching a clip of Ben Affleck on the voyage of the Mimi. Just be a fun blast from the past. And I was sitting in my office, my home office, sweating from watching this video. I hate to, I don't want to, you know, I don't want to make you too aroused. Uh-huh. There's a similar compilation from Laura Dern's time. Holy shit.

Oh, man, when she went down that Soul Train line? Yeah. Oh, boy. In them hot khakis. In the khakis. In the khakis. In the khakis. The khakis. Come on now. She's doing the hustle.

Yeah. She's going down the soul train line. Maybe it's like, I don't know, Earth, Wind and Fire song, Shining Star maybe. Something like that. Sure. Probably Shining Star. Rosie Perez, the way she would look at you like she was so disgusted at you, but still be dancing her goddamn ass off. The faces she pulls in this shit are out of control.

So I'm like, I got to get Rosie Perez on Bullseye. Yes. Because I'm thinking about how great Rosie Perez is. Like, how come she's not on my show? She's great on Search Party. Sure. I've been watching Search Party. I was like, man, Rosie Perez is so great.

So I tweeted at her excited. I was like, we'd tried before, but I was like, I'll just tweet at her and see if that works. Yeah. She tweets back, love your show. Listen on WNYC. I'm like, great. We're best friends now. Never anything else from Rosie Perez.

Never anything else. I've been following her for like two years trying to become friends with Rosie Perez. And all I get are tweets about HBO boxing. That's like the only thing that Rosie Perez tweets about. That's all she writes about now. 100% live boxing commentary. And I thought I had it. I thought I was in.

I'm like, I am friends with Rosie Perez now. Failed completely. Yeah. Now I'm just going to focus on being friends with the guy in the Celtics jersey from Do the Right Thing. I'm having a similar thing with Rosie O'Donnell right now, actually. Oh, yeah? Really?

You went on the cruise. You met. You flirted a little. It went well. Right. You hit me with a koosh ball. I got Rosie. I said me with a koosh ball. What's his name? I got Rosie.

I said Rosie O'Donnell. I might want to make sure I don't get white boy's name with the Boston Celtics jersey name wrong. Michael Rappaport? No. No. It seems like it should be Michael Rappaport, but it's two years pre-Rappaport. Yeah. Okay. I did have Michael Rappaport on Bullseye, and he liked me so much he went to his car,

pulled out his movie poster, autographed it, and gave it to me without asking me whether I wanted it. John Savage. Boom. John Savage. John Savage. He's got it. Savage pull, Ricky.

Thank you. I mean, I had to use my phone. You guys saw me. I pulled my phone out. You did. You actually pulled out your phone. Is that joke even going to make sense to people at home who couldn't tell that you were actually pulling out your phone? They're going to be like, which one of these is my dedication to space work, which I am famous for?

Which is real, which isn't real. Brian Fernandez is our producer. He's the one laughing loudly outside the studio, almost certainly too loudly. If you've got thoughts about that, you know where to send them. Get up on Twitter. Hit up at GasStationTV. Ricky Carmona, he's the host of Who Shot Ya? Yes.

Out every Friday, ready for your movie weekend. Yep. At MaximumFun.org alongside April Wolf and Alonso Duralde. I have a friend who I went for a hike with yesterday, and he told me, you know who's fucking cool? And I was like, who's that? And he's like, April Wolf. And I'm like, yeah, she's hella cool.

And he's like, I think I have a crush on April Wolf just because she's so badass. And I was like, fair, man. Yeah, dude. Fair. Yeah. Fair. Solid badass crush. Yeah, so check

out Who Shot Ya? right there on MaximumFun.org. Hit us up on Reddit at HotWife.reddit.com MaximumFun.reddit.com MaximumFun.reddit.com Hit up Gas Station TV with your corrections at Gas Station TV.

Yeah, and if you want any used entities, I'm going to be hanging around the North Hollywood Metro station. That's why they call it the arts district, baby. Yeah. And if you're buying my panties, it's the farts district. Because I farted them. Hey, oh, here's one thing that I did want to mention before we go this week, Jordan.

There's still a few tickets left for Max Fun Con. Get them. I've been booking up Max Fun Con with some pretty fucking amazing guests. As you do. You've been to Max Fun Con, Ricky. You know what the fuck it's like. I know been booking up MaxFunCon with some pretty fucking amazing guests. As you do. You've been to MaxFunCon, Ricky. You know what the fuck it's like. I know what's up. It's a party.

So I just want to tell everybody, MaxFunCon.com. It is a wonderful, life-changing experience for many people. And others don't care for it. No. Very, very few people have ever not cared for it. Very, very few people have ever not cared for it. Very, very few people have ever not cared for it. So, yeah. Hit up MaxFunCon.com if you want those MaxFunCon tickets.

And thank you for all the dank memes, everyone. Very dank. Everyone out there has been sharing the most lovely, tree-beat. Nasty meme lords from coast to coast. Thanks for the memories. Yeah, yeah. The memeries. Thanks, thanks memeries. I was thinking maybe we could come up with a few extra

tree bee memes if anybody needs anything for their memes. Yeah, I don't think we've seen a, I mean, I think we've been using kind of traditional meme templates. Right. I don't think we've seen a crying Jordan. Oh, yeah. Am I wrong about that? No. I mean, I'd love to see a crying Jordan tree bee meme.

Yeah, that would be really cool. What about where Kermit the Frog is sipping the tea? Mmm. And it says, like, tree bee, and it should say, tree bee fine. Yeah, something like that. How about that? Yeah. Tree bee fine.

I love it. Yeah. That's all the memes, I think. Is that all the memes? Yeah, I think once we do crying Jordan and tea lizard, then we've got... What about if the tree bee is getting

at Pepe? No, let's not do that. Maybe not involve Pepe. He's like, ow! The tree bee's really taking it to him. Yeah, I think that'll just be confusing for people. Can we have people just take regular Treebee memes and post them in the Donald Trump subreddit? Yeah.

You know what? Get over there at r slash the Donald and confuse everyone with Treebee memes. Yeah. And maybe get doxxed. I think there's some kind of cumulative points on Reddit that they would be losing, but I do not know. Sure. Hard to say.

I mean, I don't understand that. Also, sometimes people write cake day. Yeah. I don't know what that is. Hard to say. Hard to say. Anyway, six years I've been on that website posting shit about it. No idea.

No idea what's going on there. Okay, Ricky, thanks for joining us. Thank you for having me. We'll talk to you on there. Okay, Ricky, thanks for joining us. Thank you for having me. We'll talk to you next time on Jordan, Jesse, Go. Bye-bye. MaximumFun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned.

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