Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 577: Dry Sub with Aimee Mann

Episode Date: March 26, 2019

Aimee Mann (The Art of Process, Mental Illness album) joins Jordan and Jesse for a discussion of how Hugh Jackman is playing Jesse’s dream role of Professor Harold Hill in The Music Man on Broadway, the bartender at Dave and Busters who recognized Jordan, and whether or not more people in the audience wore bowling shoes in everyday life than own a fez. Plus, Aimee talks about her new MaxFun podcast that she hosts with Ted Leo, The Art of Process.   It's MaxFunDrive time and Aimee has an amazing new challenge reward if we meet our goal of 25,000 new and upgrading donors -- she's going to write a song about Jordan's cat, Bug! Donate so we can hear that song!   Go to MaximumFun.org/Donate right now to support the show!   And let us know if you've ever been on a submarine or if you've ever been in a cover band (and gotten paid) -- 206-984-4FUN or [e-mail]!

Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you. It's Jordan Jesse Goh, I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Oh, boy detective, huh? Well, you just did a weird first syllable, so I thought I would. Did I really? It was a little weird.

Do you think that's just because... I did not do it on purpose. Do you think it's because I'm so pumped up on Sudafed? I mean, that's one explanation. Are you pumped on the Fed? Oh, yeah. Like I was fucking Donald Trump at the presidential debates. You suiting? What do they call being blasted on Sudafed? Getting Feddy.

Getting Feddy. Yeah. Fun Feddy? Yeah. Like the cupcakes. Yeah, you got it. Man, I am so, I'm completely out of my mind. Yeah. Funfetti? Yeah. Like the cupcakes. Yeah, you got it. Man, I am so, I'm completely out of my mind. Wow. Taking some Excedrin today, taking a number of Sudafed. Had to go through that sad ritual where you- Don't mix, baby.

Come on. Where you go to the, you know where you go to the pharmacist and you have to convince them you're not a meth dealer? Come on. You know the old, you know the old rhyme. Sudafed before Excedrin, you'll hurt your head in that situation. Yeah. And of course, Excedrin before Pseudofed, you'll be dead.

Oh, geez. Yeah. Well, I guess that gives the lie to that old wives tale because here I am, baby. Oh, wow. Podcasting and better than ever. Alive, well. Messing up syllables. Man, you know what?

Fuck those old wives and their tales. They're never true. Oh, yeah. Sorry. I don't mean to come out against old wives. Look, if I wanted a tale, I'd ask Genji. What are you talking about? The tale of Genji?

I don't know what that is. It's like the first Japanese novel. Oh. Yeah, get Genji on the line. Unless he's somebody's wife. Then I don't want to hear from him. Well, if he's a young wife. Yeah, I'd hear from a young wife. Or like a truly elderly wife. Right, yeah.

But not an old wife. No, old wives are the ones spreading those tales. A wife in a coma? Sure, absolutely. My favorite Smith song. Yeah, but not an old wife. No, old wives are the ones spreading those tales. A wife in a coma? Sure. Absolutely. My favorite Smith song. Should we introduce our guest? I'd love to. Of course, she's an award-winning singer-songwriter.

She's a gifted actor. A lot of people don't know that. She's the host or co-host of The Art of Process, a brand new smash hit Maximum Fun podcast. She is much too good for this. Amy Mann. Thank you for that fabulous introduction. I completely object to the – I'm a terrible actor, but thank you. I've stumbled my way through a couple of things.

It's very – I'd love to stumble my way through something. That's the dream. We were talking about this a little bit before Mike, but a friend was gushing to me when, because we were eating Gushers. Love a friend gush. Me and some friends are just gushing.

A friend and I were just fruit by the footing. Ooh! Was gushing to me about how great you were on the Gianni Versace show. Thank you. I just, you know, sang a song to a version of the song I had already sung before. So it wasn't really been singing. Was it like one of those? I was pretending to sing.

Oh, what is it called? Lip Syncing. Was it like one of those things where a band plays at the Peach Pit for the cast of 90210? Or they go to the Max to perform for the, what's that show called? Save by the Bell. I think the Max only had close-up magic. I don't think a band ever played. Wait, did Harry Anderson come to the Max?

No, there was a budget Harry Anderson on Save by the Bell who would perform close-up magic for the kids. But it would have some sort of symbolism to what they were going on, what was going on with them that week. Really? I think so. I watched a lot of Saved by the Bell. I don't remember any. Any magical metaphors? Not at all.

Yeah. remember a time on out of this world where abraham lincoln put evie's cashmere sweater into what he called the make small machine turns out it was the dryer oh boy where's that reboot yeah come on abe i've watched none no saved by the bell but the magic metaphor uh segment intrigues me now yeah um what so what would you so you, so you, okay, so you were on the Versace program. Yes. You were very funny on Portlandia as yourself. Thank you. But, you know, I got Fred and Carrie there and my instructions to

them were, please tell me exactly what to do so that I am funny and don't embarrass you. I think it's a hilarious episode. One of my faves. Amy, you would never embarrass them. You'd embarrass you. Amy, you would never embarrass them. You'd embarrass yourself. Yeah.

And by association, they would be embarrassed. So they have a stake in it. It's not as big as my stake. And the entire Independent Film Channel. Yeah. Exactly. I think based on our experience hosting a television program for the Independent Film Channel, they're unembarrassable. That's true.

They're without shame. Yeah. You embarrass yourself. You embarrass the rerun of Lake Placid that comesembarrassable. That's true. They're without shame. Yeah, you embarrass yourself. You embarrass the rerun of Lake Placid that comes on after you. Yep. Anyway, that's what's on IFC

these days, I think. Yeah, pretty much. Who knows? Yeah, I couldn't tell you. Do you have a favorite acting role? Do you have a time when you think like,

oh, man nailed it on this one? I really haven't done that much. I mean, I do think the Portlandia thing was pretty good. Yeah, it's really good. I'm fairly't done that much. I mean, I do think the Portlandia thing was pretty good. Yeah, it's really good. I'm fairly proud of that.

Do you have a dream role? Like a role I'd like to play? I'll give you an example. Hugh Jackman just tweeted, and a lot of people shared this information with me. Hugh Jackman just tweeted that he will be playing Professor Harold Hill in The Music Man on Broadway. Oh, that's right. Now, I'm no murderer. But you would like to murder him for doing that?

Should I? Is that the end of the sentence? Should I? Look, do you think you could take Jackman? No murderer. From behind. He's Jack, man. I could take him if he didn't see me coming.

You would sneak up on Jackman? Hypothetically. Now, I would never. Some rubber Some rubber sole shoes and you're in. I want to be clear. I'm no murderer. And yet the murder is being planned tonight. I do own a black turtleneck some black pants

some black let's say Keds. Black Keds? Yeah. The sneaking shoes. Yeah. The sneak and shoes. Yeah, those are sneak and shoes. Sneak and shoes. I like to sneak in my shape-ups. Oh, yeah.

So it tones my bottom as I sneak up on... That's how Joe Montana does all his murdering. Wait a minute. Was your murdering thing going to tie back to Hugh Jackman? Yeah, so...

That's who you're going to murder? If I can take out Jackman, and granted, is Jackman an international treasure? Sure. Nothing wrong with Jackman per se, other than the fact that as far as I can tell, and I haven't looked at the depth charts recently, but as far as I can tell, he's the only thing standing between me and being Professor Harold Hill on Broadway.

Is that your goal? Is that a goal of yours? Yeah, that's why I got into the entertainment industry. Would you like to sing? And by the entertainment industry, I guess I mean NPR. I feel like that calls for you singing something from the music band. Trouble? A little trouble?

Yeah. Hold on. I just have my pitch pipe. Wah. Shapoopy? I don't think that's a... Yeah, sing Shapoopy. I don't know the music band that well.

The girl is hard to get. Sing Shapoopy. Sing Shapoopy. It's a Harold Hill. Yeah, sing Sha-Poopy. I don't know the music band that well. The girl is hard to get. Sing Sha-Poopy. Sing Sha-Poopy. It's a little hard to say three times fast. It's not the Harold Hill character. I'm not. What's the Harold's? Come on.

Do you get 76 trombones? Do you know songs from? 76 trombones. That's a Harold Hill. Music man. What's it? Marion the Librarian. That's a great one. Music man. What's it? Marion the Librarian. That's a great one.

Yeah. Just two bars. You really want me to sing? Yeah. You're a professional singer. Let me blow in my pitch pipe again. Oh, you brought one too. We all have pitch pipes.

I'm not singing acapella while we're... 76 Trombones at the big parade. And make hornets. They were followed by rows and rows of the finest virtuosos and drums of every shape and size. I'm into it. Huge. Is it Hugh Jackman? Hugh Jackman, step aside.

Yeah. You are cluttering up the walkway adamantium wow um well this is the greatest showman now asshole wow wait hold on do you think the greatest showman was about wolverine i'm pretty sure you think that was an extra hugeMen? It starred Hugh Jackman. He's not Wolverine in all of his movies. Is he not? No. He wasn't the one I saw. Well, that's one. Yeah. There are others.

That's 100%. Yeah. No, you're right. I think every movie, and now, boy, God, I mean, implications for the X-Men universe is now is the Music Man part of the X-Men universe. Yeah, absolutely. Wow. Yeah.

He's a mutant. His mutant power is salesmanship. Suddenly that show makes a lot more sense. Sell anything. Oh, yeah. And, of course, the townspeople, their mutant power is Iowa stubborn. What's the Wells Fargo wagons mutant power? Coming down the street.

Yeah, yeah. Hey, I wanted to, because it's the Max Fun Drive. Yeah, that's true. Where we're talking about the fans, how much we appreciate the fans. We've got some fans right here as we record. This is not what we normally do, but we decided this week we would live stream this week's record on Facebook. So we've got fans watching around the world. Six, eight, nine of them.

Wow, nine. Hold on, let me call my mom. Yeah, mom, nine. Oh, it went down to eight. I think your mom stepped away from the screen for a second. Oh, yeah, nine. Oh, it went down to eight. I think your mom stepped away from the screen for a second. Oh, yeah. Right. My mom just turned on PewDiePie.

My mom loves PewDiePie. I don't know why. Well, she's a crypto-Nazi. Oh, yeah. PewDiePie's bad. Yeah. Anyway, sorry to bandy about the name PewDiePie casually. Yeah. It's funie casually. Yeah.

It's fun to say. Yeah. But I won't say it anymore. I was on Twitter. Cool. I know. Well, I'm not bragging. Microblogging?

My lifestyle. And someone at mentioned me. And they said, hey, I'm just tweeting at random people. Can you give a shout out to pewdiepie oh god support independent performers what and so i don't really know about pewdiepie except that he was accused of being a crypto nazi uh however what i found myself wishing was that we on Jordan, Jesse go, right? The confounding, frustrating, and ultimately disappointing podcast that we host had people who cared so much

about our program that they would be tweeting at PewDiePie to say, Hey, can you just give a shout out to Jordan, Jesse go? That would be nice. What's PewDiePie doing that? hey, can you just give a shout out to Jordan Jesse Go? That would be nice. What's PewDiePie doing that we're not? Streaming, I guess. Yeah, I guess he's streaming on Twitch. Having various views that we don't support. Having some views. I wanted to, because we're talking about the fans this week.

And I had a really nice interaction with a fan. And I just wanted to shout them out personally yeah and I just wanted to take this space in the show to create some space I love spaces yeah I just wanted to create a space to say just a hi and a shout out to Alex the bartender at the Hollywood and Highland David Buster's Oh, wow. Who looked at my ID. And I'm glad he checked my ID. Yeah, of course. Because, I mean, do I look under 21?

Okay. I mean, I guess so. I'm flattered. You know what? Thank you. I'm flattered. Thank you. Yeah.

To be ID'd at my age. Right. That was thrill one. Yeah. To be ID'd. Yeah. Thrill two was to be inside David Buster's. You didn't even have your face on when they ID'd you.

No, uh-uh. And he looked at the ID and he's like- Straight from the gym. He's like, Jordan Morris? Mm-hmm. He says, I listen to your podcast every day. Now, should you listen to the show every day? I mean, maybe not.

I mean, I guess you could listen to it. That would probably divert your life. Yeah. From a, towards a more dissolute path. It's an hour. I guess I just wonder at what you were listening to at that point. Are you re-listening to the same? Because we only do an hour and a half a week.

Right. On a daily show. This isn't the daily. This isn't the gist. But, you know. Maybe it's spaced out in segments. Oh, yeah. Maybe he listens to it. Half hour segments. Ten minutes. I don't know what his commute is. I, you know. Maybe it's spaced out in segments. Oh, yeah. Maybe he listens to it 10 minutes.

I don't know what his commute is. I don't know if you asked him. So that's three days right there. Yeah. So, you know, maybe there's a backlog. Yeah. Maybe it came late to the game. Could be.

Yeah, could be. He's just, he's like, I've been listening to Podice every day for two weeks. Yeah. Every week, there's 90 minutes of the regular show, 90 minutes or so. You've got the guests, you've got the banter, you've got the different segments. Then there's the Doughboys double if you're a member of the Patreon. It's Doughboys, you're thinking. Oh, okay.

This is not Doughboys. I wish it was. Yeah. It would be a dream. God, that would be amazing. God, I would love to be on Doughboys. Anyway. But he said-

I honestly thought I did a great job on the show. I don't know why I haven't been back. I get it. Nicole Byer is available. Sure. She don't know why I haven't been back. I get it. Nicole Byer is available. Sure. She's fun. She's great in everything. She is?

Yeah. Can she host the show with me? Amy, do you want to do a podcast with Nicole Byer? I don't know who that is, but sure. She's a delight. You'll love her. She's a joy. Much better than Jesse.

Yeah, well, you know, can't be everything. You can't sing a music man and be delightful I'm not saying you're not delightful I think Jesse is what we call a single threat You can sing the music man And I got about, I'm maybe like a half threat My single threat is talk singing

Part threat It's a little bit of a threat I'm a regular Rex Harrison Good suspender hook when you said that Thank you So he checks my ID Yeah. It's a little bit of a threat. I'm a regular Rex Harrison. Good suspender hook when you said that. Thank you. So he checks my ID. He says, I've listened to your podcast every day, which was a thrill to hear.

I mean, I was confused by it, but also thrilled. And then he said, hey. I also love news radio. I love to get all kinds of viewpoints. Sure. Your podcast is a real experience, Joe Rogan. And he said, first rounds on me, which was a thrill. That's fantastic. I mean, that was great.

Wow. And I hope I'm not getting him in trouble with Dave and Buster's corporate by saying that. I don't know if he was allowed to do that, if that's part of the— I can help with this. Dave does listen a few weeks ago buster kind of sent me a really mean email we said something that upset him yeah you don't want to piss off buster about uh bw3 yeah and uh he he said all he listens to now it's never not funny well you like stop podcasting yourself because they're nicer than we are. That's true.

We're Canadian. So he first rounds on me and then he's like, you know, I was thinking I was going to run into you here. And I thought, am I that predictable?

Am I that predictable? Dude. I like to think of myself as an enigma. You know, you don't know whether I'm coming or going. Anyway. You must have left a lot of clues in your many hours of constant listening. As with the enigma. A lot of clues were dropped. He got together a crack team of our nation's greatest scientists and cracked your code.

He's right. I imagine he has a bulletin board in his room with a red string tied to various newspaper articles. This way, that way, upsy-dowsy. How do I run into Jordan, he thought. Work at Dave & Buster's. And sure enough. I mean, you've never talked about Dave and Buster's on the show before. I think I have, actually.

Have you? Yeah. I don't really pay attention while you're talking. You just got to note out. Can we get Nicole in here? Nicole Byer. Nicole Byer, everybody. Nicole Byer.

Replacing everyone. That is a really beautiful experience, Jordan. It was a beautiful experience. Despite me not feeling like as much of an enigma as I thought I was, because I assumed I was one. But yeah, it was really, really nice. I want to give a shout out to Alex. Thanks for that cocktail. It was great.

I had a lovely time at the Hollywood and Highland David Busters. What was your drink? Tequila and club soda. Nice, you know. It's kind of a romance drink. Yes. Right. Just a masculine dude hanging out at David Buster's.

Just a real straight. Right. And yet refreshing. My dad drank it. My granddad drank it. You could call it a tequila spritzer. Oh, I could. I should call it a spritzer.

Lighten it up a little. Do you have a regular drink? What's your order? I like Campari and Soda, which could not be more of a ladies drink. Yeah. But I don't know. I think a lot of international gents like Campari, if you're a well-traveled gent. It's an aperitif.

Yeah. It sure is. The well-traveled gent. Jordan, when you ordered your tequila and soda, what shelf did he go to? Was it a well-traveled? I think it was rail, yeah. Hey, Alex, fuck you. I know I told a nice story.

Hey, how about middle shelf? How about George Clooney's tequila? No, E40's tequila. Tequila, please. Turtle from Entourage. Iquarenta tequila, please. There's multiple celebrity tequilas he could have poured. But he chose.

Alex claims that he listens. Yeah. We'll see about that. I had a really nice experience with a fan. Oh, yeah? Yeah, totally. Do tell. Probably a lot of our listeners don't know, but when I'm not working at Maximum Fun, I have a job as a private detective.

Hold on, just real quick. A singing private detective. Right. God, that's a Coen Brothers movie coming up. You know it. Yeah. Hold on, just real quick. A singing private detective. Right. God, that's a Coen Brothers movie coming up. You know it. Yeah. Hold on, just real quick. Is this story real?

No. Okay, go ahead. Yeah. So I work downtown in an office as a private detective. Private detective, sure. And- Who sings? It was The Golden Hour.

Mm-hmm. And I had the shades. I have like louvered shades, you know like uh venetian blinds or whatever on my on my windows and i had them open somewhat so it lets some light in but also there were shadows and honestly when i do that it gets hot so i went ahead and uh turn on the ceiling fan oh boy is that where you were going the whole time? I guess. Cool.

Right here. Hold on. I had a great experience with the fan the other day. Okay. Oh, really? Yeah. I wanted to watch a lesser Robert De Niro movie. Ah, sure.

Yeah. So. Yeah. Robert De Niro and Wesley Snipes in that one? Yeah. I think Wesley Snipes was in that. I feel like the only thing, I've never seen the movie, but I remember being excited because I think Robert De Niro wore a San Francisco Giants hat in that movie. Oh.

And that was like, just as with, you know, How I Married an Axe Murderer or something. You know, you get a little shot of your hometown. Sure. You get a real thrill out of that. A real slice of life. I mean, it's not a real tequila-level thrill. No. There's a show, I don't know if this is

before your time, but a TV show called Manix that I remember watching as a kid in late 60s, early 70s. You know, detective. Private detective. And there was a shot of him running down a street a block away, and I was so unreasonably excited.

A block from where I live. Manix! And you're like, oh, this is the Manix street. He's here! It's so exciting. Where was it? What part of town? It's in Las Feliz. Okay.

But just also the idea of a television show shooting in Las Feliz, I don't know why that seems ridiculous, but we've been watching a lot of those early 70s. Like, Canon is one. And it's just, boy, the standards, the locations are so junky. You feel like they just, like, pulled, you know, like, drove around and pulled it to the side of the street and was like, eh, I guess this will do. Like, it just seems so wildly unplanned.

Are the shows good? No. The Mannix, I remember loving Mannix as a kid. And it's terrible. The writing is terrible. It's worse than, like, if we just came up with a plot right now and transcribed just exactly what first came to our minds in terms of dialogue, it would be a thousand percent better. Like for instance, a mutant with an adamantium skeleton has to unload a bunch of musical instruments on an unsuspecting town off the top of my head. That already is better. But also just like the dialogue is so weirdly still.

Like it was almost like you have to try to make it not flow. It's really kind of amazing. Canon is slightly better, but its location, it's all like parking lots and it's shot at night and there's no light. So it's just like murky shapes are very amazingly poor whenever i would like encounter a 70s rerun as a kid chips i think my mom liked a chips rerun i think she might have never watched she might have had an erica strata thing yeah yeah yeah that's usually the cause of chips i saw erica strata one time uh-huh here in los angeles how'd

that go it's very shiny man. Yeah. He was shiny? He was sweating? Had a shine on him. No unnatural. Like a natural oil? Yeah.

He was just oiled up? Like a seal. He was. Just oiled up oil. I would characterize him as taut. Oh, uh-huh. Not muscular, but taut. Oh, got it.

You could bounce a dime off him. Oh, got it. You could flick a dime at Estrada. A light translucence. Right. Yeah, I always remember as a kid being upset watching a 70s rerun by how brown everything was. So brown. Too much brown.

Everything is brown. Come on. It's the 70s brown. It's true. Some things were orange and other things were avocado green. That's true. Yeah, but mostly it was brown. There was a lot of brown.

And yeah, a lot of things that were very close to brown as well. My dad's car when I was like, I was going to say 10 to 14, he inherited it from a friend who died. It was a 77 Nova. It was metallic brown. Oh, yeah. Give it a little zhuzh. Yeah, exactly. Zhuzh up that brown. You got to zhuzh the brown. Zhuzh the brown. Oh, yeah. Mm-hmm. Give it a little zhuzh. Yeah, exactly. Zhuzh up that brown.

You got to zhuzh the brown. Zhuzh the brown, baby. Yeah. You don't want a flat brown. That's actually a line in my personal's hat for somebody to zhuzh the brown. Oh, God. You know what I mean? It's really, really hot in here.

Yeah, it is. I'm going to remove my sweater. Let's take a quick break so Amy Mann can remove her sweater. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse Go. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, I'm Jesse Thorne. Off that fetty. Jordan Moore's boy detective. Amy Mann, Nick Nameless. Come on, Amy. The Nick Nameless. That could be the name of the hard-boiled singing detective, Nick Nameless.

Jordan, why do we- Nick Nameless. Punch, punch. Why do we bring these dignified people onto our show? Why do we bring these people with a sense of self-respect? Yeah, get Fairbanks in here. Dance, dance, Fairbanks. I ran into him in an alley. We want to hear you bumble.

Yeah. Wait, did you run into Chris Fairbanks in an alley? Yeah, we were both in an alley walking at each other. What the fuck? Yeah, it was great. He lives near there. Wait, like in the dumpster? No, he lives in a house.

It's just near an alley. Got it. Anyway, it was really fun. Same day I met Alex, the guy who gave me the drink at Dave & Buster's. Sounds like a hell of a day, Dave. God, it was a great day.

I'm not going to lie to you. Best day of my life. Free drinking and wandering the alley. Amy, I have a question for you, okay? It is. So you're a music icon. Thank you. You're not – your fame has more depth than breadth.

You are deeply meaningful to many people, but you are not very slightly meaningful to hundreds of millions. It's like a spike in the ground. Right. It's like a stake hammered into the ground. live show here in Los Angeles, I could see any time Jen had finished talking to Amy and then walked far enough away that Amy couldn't see her anymore. She was basically doing like a face because I think she so admires Amy Mann. I will be doing it in the car on the way home. Thank you for your exaggerated response.

I'll be doing the same thing when Devin the Dude is a guest on our show. I appreciate it and accept your flattery. However, I think that is certainly, I'm sure it can be burdensome at times, but it's a nice kind of fame. And I wonder what the best thing you've ever gotten was and what kind of drink it was at Dave & Buster's. Free food? I've gotten a ton of free things. Let me think about it during the course of this evening. Maybe it could be a homemade.

I don't know if anybody's sewn your likeness into a pillow. your likeness into a pillow. Oh, there's a placemat that someone painted a picture of a cat that I sang about. Goose. I have a song called Goose Snowcone and it was essentially about a cat.

And they painted a placemat which is so bizarre that it was awesome. I didn't know that song was about a cat. It was kind of inspired by a cat. Is it obvious or did I just totally miss it? It is not obvious and it requires explanation every time I play it

which makes me feel like an idiot. Because my radar is up for cat content. So I'm like, I've listened to that song many times. I didn't get the cat. It's not obvious. So I was on tour and I was in Ireland.

It was very cold and snowy. And it was one of those – like I was feeling homesick and kind of depressed and like ugh. And so I started writing the song. But I was also kind of at the same time looking on Instagram and there is a cat whose owners I follow and the cat's name is Goose. And it was a picture of her looking like a little snow cone because she had a cone, like a white face and a cone on. Because she had stitches or something? Yeah. So it was just like a sad, it was like one of the sad, like mew, plaintive little things.

So I was using this phrase Goose Snow cone, kind of as a placeholder. Except it just, like, I don't know, like, it made sense because it was snowy. And, like, I don't know. Like, it made sense in my mind. And I was like, I'm going to replace this because I don't want to have to explain to, like, every time I play the song. And then, of course, I say this exact story. Like, yep, I don't want to have to explain it, but I'm going to. Here it is.

Here it is. Yeah, so I never replaced it. I just couldn't come up with anything that made sense. And I was like, fuck it. It's fine. I like it more now. Yeah, Jordan has certain standards. Sort of like how in Canada on the radio you have to play 20% Canadian

music or whatever. In Jordan's car, it's 20% of what they call cat con. Cat related? Cat content. Cat content. So yeah, it's basically I just have to play that one weaker than song every five minutes. And I will write a song. I will write a complete all cat, an all cat song just for you.

Don't fuck with me man you gotta do it i'll do it i'll absolutely do it wow i'll do it my life it's complete would you like to give me the specs for your cat your cat like what kind of cat song would you what's your ideal cat song oh my gosh uh wow j, can I get you some new pants? Please describe your ideal cat number. Wow, my ideal cat. Well, I would like it to be about my cat. That would be nice. What's your cat's name?

Her name is Bug. Bug. She's nice. She likes to sleep. She likes to chase the laser pointer, right? No. Yeah, she's never gotten much into laser pointers. Really?

There's some rubber bands that she enjoys. Oh, this is, see, this is, she's never gotten much into laser pointers. Really? There's some rubber bands that she enjoys. Oh, let's just see. This is – she's got her own thing. Like every cat does a laser pointer. It's a rare cat that will chase a rubber band. Yeah, yeah. This cat stands out of the pack. Right.

Of the cat pack. She's very unique. Yes. So, you know, she likes to get a hug. She'll stand on the coffee table. But we got bug and hug already. We got like a rhyme scheme. Oh, yeah.

What rhymes with rubber band? It's many things. We'll a rhyme scheme. Oh, yeah. What rhymes with rubber band? It's many things. We'll figure it out. That's an easy one. Rhymezone.com. You could just go all bug, hug, drug, thug. Snug. Yeah.

Thug. Mm-hmm. Rug. Cure rug. Talk about making coffee. Well, you have to kind of. Cure rug. Weaker than you'd like coffee. Right. Make a cup of coffee in the cure rug talk about making coffee yeah well you have to kind of weaker than you'd like

right make a cup of coffee in the cure rug yes so yes uh personalized cat song just for you thank you that would be amazing yeah put it in the hopper thanks yeah um that's what they call the art of process jordan your new podcast. But especially for a show like Jordan, Jesse, go. Almost all of our funding comes from you directly from you who are listening right now. All of the thousands of people who become maximum fund members and elect to support Jordan, Jesse, go. Please do. Alex bought a round of drinks. Right. He's a stand-up dude. Yeah, of course.

But you better believe I left a tip. Yeah. You're no piker. No. But so I would like to encourage the listener to think about the pledge drive. You know, if you're not somebody who donates to, you know, NPR or PBS or something, maybe the donation concept can be a little hard to get your brain around. And I like to think about it like this. Don't think of it as, you know, paying for something free. Think about it as just giving a tip to somebody who's providing something you like. I think, you know, if you're out there and you're listening, you probably don't think twice about

throwing down a tip for a bartender or throwing something to the barista. Maybe they got a cute either or thing they're doing with the tips. Marvel or DC. I don't know. Those are fun. So, yeah, if you tip those people. Wolverine and the Music Man. Right.

They're the same guy. They're the same guy now. Yeah. The Music Man. Right. They're the same guy. They're the same guy now. Yeah.

If you, you know, if you and if you're out there and you're and you're a tipper and you should be. Yeah. Just think of this as throwing your favorite podcasters, you know, a buck a show. If you want to make it more than a buck a show, that's great. But a buck a show goes a long, long way. You're getting a hearty drink, two hearty drink. Yeah. Of podcast to filling potent drinks of podcast yes toss a tip out there toss a tip that free drink you just got and i love and i love talking about it in this term in these

terms because you know i think it does help people kind of kind of you know wrap their brain around it and also when i make this analogy i get to hear from the beautiful people of the I Don't Tip community. And I love all, you're so great. I love you. And I love hearing from you at this time of year. You're so logical. They've got a system, Jordan. Yeah. Anyway, I do not want to hear from you. And they just finished the fountainhead. They just finished the fountainhead. They want me to add PewDiePie. Just texted you a spreadsheet they made. Amy, your podcast, The Art of the Process, unlike this show, which is a goof around, stuff goes into it. You and Ted kind of record.

You're kind of bi-coastal. You have guests whom you research in order to talk about the process. Ted sits there and edits the show himself. This is a literal rock star. No, he's unbelievable. Yeah, he edits it himself. And he's, you know, he's got a good ear. He's great at it.

But I've been interested in this. I'll tell you what I got interested in, unless we are still talking about, no, let's hear. Yeah. Let's, we're talking about podcasts. Um,

I did a thing. Okay. This requires me to brag. So I'm just going to get that over with. Do it. I was asked to, um, and the,

uh, to do a poetry thing at the, it's called deaf poetry jam. It comes out after Saturday night live at the – It's called Deaf Poetry Jam. It comes out after Saturday Night Live. At the Obama White House. Whoa. Yes, exactly. That's the break. That's the good White House.

And that was the good one. And that was just – that was so awesome. And I don't really know why I was included in the poetry thing, but God bless them. And so there was poets and there were a couple of other musicians. But I got to sort of see these poets not only perform, but there was a seminar that they did in the afternoon for high school poetry students or English students, and they answer questions. And the poet Billy Collins was – he spoke particularly eloquently about – he was asked about – not really about process, but he – somebody said, you know, how do you find your own voice in poetry? And he said, study the form because people who are interested in poetry will come for the form. And if you perfect the form and inhabit the form,

your voice will emerge. And I just thought that there was something so interesting about that. You know, that because I, you know, people think that an art form is about like, oh, I got to have something to say. Like, no, you have, it's more like you have to have something to do.

I'm already like, I have a notepad here. And just hearing those words from the former poet laureate of the United States, I've already got a line. There once was a man from Nancy. Okay. Hold on. I'm studying the form. There it is. Okay.

Start with the form, Jordan. Live maturity that we are. Rhyme bug and hug. Damn it. That's the only rhyme I'm interested in. So yeah. So you guys interview creative people about how they put their thing together. Not the sort of moments of inspiration because like who can control that? But I feel like there is – there are like practical things that people do that bring you to the creative – like being organized and how do you practice and what initially influenced you and what did you imitate and how did those things that you imitated, how that end up merging into what you do now? I feel like you your relationship with Ted in part is is grows from process that like the two of you were like, hey, we should try writing songs together. Yeah. And see if that's anything. Yeah. And that was really interesting because it was, we both had to write in a different kind

of way. It is really interesting to collaborate with somebody when you're used to just doing it on your own. I mean, you don't have to tell me and Jordan. I mean, Jordan's been working with Nicole Byer and it is amazing. Amazing. We have a new show coming out. We're called The Both and it is amazing. Yeah. Amazing.

We have a new show coming out. We're called The Both and I think people will really like it. Here's the thing. Somebody, Jordan, somebody the other day. Yes. I did, because it's the Max Fund Drive, I did a live stream on Facebook and somebody asked me, hey, do advertisers ever not advertise on Jordan, Jesse Go because they don't get it?

advertise on Jordan, Jesse, go because they don't get it. And the answer to that question is mostly advertisers don't advertise on Jordan, Jesse, go because we don't have enough listeners. But yes, the answer to that is yes. But there's also a second answer to that. And I was glad they asked that question, which is when you are making media that is primarily supported by advertising, your job is to create an environment that is conducive to sales. And that is, at the end of the day, bottom line, no matter how far you are separated from the advertising sales team or whatever, no matter how many firewalls there are, your goal is and always will be to do stuff that puts people in the mood to be receptive to advertising and for that advertising to convert them to buying something. And I think that's fine. And it works great for some things.

And I think that's fine and it works great for some things. For a show like Amy's show or for a show like our show, I'm very grateful that we have a different model. Like when we have advertisers on the show and we've had some really great advertisers on the show, I'm always grateful for that. But we know that we are not relying on them. We ultimately – our end consumer is the end consumer. The audience is who pays for this show. And that's why I'm very grateful that we can do shows like we do because of people who become members of Maximum Fun. Yeah, totally. I mean, yeah, I mean, there's a lot of like reasons people do podcasts these days. You know, they're you know, it's it's kind know, it's kind of a hot medium. You know, it can be turned into TV and books and things like that, which is very cool if that happens to a show.

That will never happen to this show. Yes. So basically the only— We've sold our format overseas, to be clear. Right, yeah. There's Jordan, Jesse Go, but everything has an umlaut over it. Yeah. Scandinavia. I don't know if everything has an umlaut over it. Yeah. Scandinavia.

I don't know if that's where umlauts are from. Probably not. It's like, bleep,'s the reason we do this. Like we, you know, show up and do this show. It is not helping our careers. It is actively hurting, actively hurts our careers. But enough people go to that website and, you know, throw us a couple of bucks every month because they like the show and they want them to keep coming. And yeah, and because of them, it's kept coming for, you know, 12-ish years now.

Yeah, and it keeps it coming. Us making cum jokes. Yep. If you like that. Yeah, so, yeah, it's really, really awesome. And I think, you know, I certainly know what it is like when a beloved podcast decides we're not going to do this anymore. It happens a lot. So yeah, if you want to, you know, if you listen to shows on Maximum Fun and you want them to not go away, a good start is to go to MaximumFun.org slash donate. So because,

you know, despite how things go with ads or other career stuff or whatever, we can keep doing this show because enough people go to that website. Yeah. It's MaximumFund.org. Our goal is 25,000 new and upgrading Max Fund members. We've got a bunch of new shows right now. And we've got a bunch of shows out there killing it with bringing in those new folks. If you've been a Jordan Jesse Go listener for a long time, or even if you've been a listener for a short time and the show already means a lot to you, go to MaximumFun.org slash donate and you can join now. We're well on our way, Jordan. Yeah. It's going to happen.

And a little bit later in the show, we want to tell you about some of the cool stuff you can get. So if for some reason appealing to your sense of decency doesn't work, we can appeal to your sense of gimme. Gimme stuff. We got it. We got stuff for you. It's really, really cool. And we'll talk a little bit more about that later in the show. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse, go. Love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, I'm the Nick Nameless. I think the Nick Nameless. I forgot I was here. Yeah. So much dignity.

You didn't forget you were here. You just blacked out. I forgot I was here. I'll just a quick update. We stopped down our first segment because Amy was hot and we needed to take off her sweater. Yeah. It's a very fun poodles poodle sweater i have to show this sweater because it's a poodle with like human hair and eyes and it's really weirdly disturbing

yeah it kind of it definitely is delightful and upsetting at the same time if you were watching the live stream you could see but um sorry it's why you gotta tune in i'm holding it up to a computer yeah it is yes it has an uncanny valley type you know appeal but also repulsion yeah those are human eyes and then it's got kind of a mullet but man whips off the sweater underneath the sweater owl t-shirt so many animal layers it's probably a pun it says never sleep on it that's probably a pun. It says never sleep on it. That's not a pun. It doesn't say I'll be seeing you. I'm telling you. Yes, that's two puns. Two puns.

Make it three. Jordan. That could be your new nickname. Amy Two Puns Man. Jordan, I don't know if you noticed this. It's very hot in here. Yeah. It's very hot in here. Yeah, it's very hot.

That's why Amy took off that sweater. I don't know if you noticed, but I've kept my second layer on. Yes. I'm wearing a blue banded collar shirt. And then over it, I'm wearing what Amy, when she arrived, described as a serape. Yeah, because I've never heard the term that you used. What did I use? Did I call it a poncho?

A drug rug. A drug rug. A drug. I don't think what you're wearing is a drug rug. Okay. It looks like it's made of linen. I feel like it needs to be a heavier weave. Yeah, kind of.

I mean, it definitely has some qualities, but I think the thing we were specifically talking about with drug rugs is the shape of a hoodie. Okay. But it has that blanket quality. I think it's called a Baja. I think the official, the appropriate name is a Baja. Fresh. Yeah. So I wore this today because, for your benefit, Amy, and for the benefit of our listeners who don't pay attention while the show is on.

This is actually mostly white noise to put babies to sleep. Yeah. This is good. This is good audio. ASMR. I like it. Just, yeah.

Sally just said her first word. It was thruple. Do not teach your kids to talk with this podcast. We have had a lot. We've kind of initiated a series of challenges here on Jordan, Jesse, and Gal. It started with, what was the first thing? I think Jeopardy! contestants was the first thing. Jeopardy! contestants.

We learned that we had a stunning volume of Jeopardy contestants was the first thing. Jeopardy contestants. We learned that we had a stunning volume of Jeopardy contestants on the program. Then we asked whether there were more Jeopardy contestants or people who owned real Fez's. No costume store bullshit. It turns out that one of the Doctor Who's wears a Fez. So Fez won walking away. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Completely dominant. I have a Fez. Really? Yeah. Where'd you get your Fez? So Fez one walking away. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Completely dominant.

I have a Fez. Really? Yeah. Where'd you get your Fez? Probably some thrift store somewhere. See, she, Amy, is a cool Gen Xer. See, that's what I was saying. Yeah.

Cool Gen Xers and actual North African people were the two categories that I identified. But you're saying your husband? My husband collects Knights Templar stuff. So he has hats with like Knights Templar insignia and plumes. Like the tricorner or the whatever. Oh, sure. A plumed tricorn. Yeah.

Where did that hobby start? You know, I think there's a certain point in your 30s where you just collect, like you land on a thing and then you collect a bunch of that thing and then you collect some other things. Like if you know him, it makes a lot of sense. He collects Masonic stuff. And I think he's like out of his collecting phase. And now we're just like desperately trying to get rid of the backlog of junk we have. Does the Knights Templar stuff invade the house? Well, we just did a bunch of construction on the house,

and so everything got packed away. And so I'm not going to mention those hats, and hopefully I'll just forget that they're in a box somewhere. That's a classic child-rearing technique. So at this point— Anyway, Fezzes, back to Fezzes. Fezzes, you have one. Do you wear it out?

No. It's not a wear. It's not a wear type of thing. You wouldn't wear that to do a show. No. You'd get out there on stage looking sharp. It's display only. It would be askew.

You know, who looks good in a Fez? It elongates the head in a way that is not flattering. A jaunty angle. There's no brim. Sonny D, Brian Fernandez, our producer, has his microphone over there. Brian, what is this week's competition? Because fez is so thoroughly destroyed. Drug rugs, which were the next one of these.

So this week we're talking bowling shoes. People who've worn bowling shoes outside of a bowling alley. And first I want to say that the drug rug people, apropos of their style, really came in strong in the second week.

They forgot to call. There were a couple people who were like, I finally got my shit together and called. Oh man, I spaced. Yeah, honestly, there were a couple of those. Okay. So we got 12 drug rugs this week, which is one third of what we got last week. Which doesn't bring it up to Fez levels.

But a little higher than we thought. A little higher. And beat Fez's on the second week of Fez's. Are you trying to beat Fez's now? We are trying to beat Fez's on the second week of Fez's. Are you trying to beat Fez's now? We are trying to beat Fez's now. We're trying to beat Fez's. As of right now, we did get a couple more Fez's this week. And so Amy is actually our 100th Fez.

Congratulations, Amy. This is huge for you. So this week was bowling shoes. Okay. Bowling shoes brought the heat. Okay. Almost all stolen. Okay.

And a couple bought from like a rummage sale at a church. Okay. 67 bowling shoe people. That's a strong showing. That's a very strong showing. Very. Stronger than I thought it was going to be. Our first Fez week was 85, so it was close. I came very close

to buying bowling shoes during the peak of bowling shoes, which I would put at, what would you say, 97? That sounds about right. I feel like there was an 80s bowling shoe run, too. I think they come in waves. These things come back around. You've got to figure the Sparks wore bowling things come back around. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, you've got to figure, like, the Sparks wore bowling shoes at some point.

Sure, yeah. And then, yeah, like, maybe at some point, Logan Paul will start wearing them, and then a new generation of kids. It's a shoe you think, you look at it, and you're like, it's kind of style, and it's sort of sporty, but, like, not in a typical way. And then you put it on, and you're like, this goes with nothing. Yeah. And then you slip and fall. Yeah, that's right. A lot of people talked about wearing them to ska shows yeah seems like it would be a good skanking you have a big skanking audience i think so yeah i think i think probably a big part of our audience was probably involved in some way in the third wave ska revival maybe even

the second wave ska revival we're talking about really would you say people's would you say somebody from madness is listening to this show right now i would hope so fingers crossed yeah come on the special sure are you that's the end of my second wave scott are you dave wakeling now we're talking now we're amy have you ever had bowling shoes i i think i'm i'm sure i did but because because I do recall that, that like, I liked them, and then I could never make them work with any kind of like, they don't really go with just jeans. And it just it was very, it's a hard sell. It was something I did in high school in my I'm going to be a high school goofball period. Yes. And I definitely I also had like, you know, the thrift store bowling shirt with like somebody else's name on it.

And I carried my books in a bowling bag for a while. So I really committed to bowling for like – That was your theme. For like a couple months. I was bowling guy. That is very funny. I'm going to pitch you guys something. Okay.

Here we go. And I want – don't be afraid to be harsh because I need constructive feedback on this. Okay. But my first thought is I want to get away from clothing items. Because we have so many naturalists listening. Yeah. People who don't even wear clothes. clothes um i am thinking and this is a first draft so don't you know don't tear me apart but i do need your frank opinion how many people have been in a submarine been in a submarine and of course

zero yeah well james cameron listens well let's make people own a submarine i mean unless you're talking about the disneyland submarine but what about like a submarine in like san diego or whatever no one that you go on a tour of there's a san diego submarine i've definitely been on a tour of a submarine really in san diego and was might have been in san diego might have been somewhere else but i've definitely been on a submarine how why what about a submarine what you have been about else, but I've definitely been on a submarine. How? Why? What about a submarine? Wait, you have been? What about a submarine sandwich? Oh, have you been inside a giant sandwich?

Maybe for sexual reasons. Do you have some sort of sandwich fetish? What about aboard a naval vessel? That's probably pretty good. That's probably pretty common. Wait, so why did you go on a submarine, though? To go on a tour. It's like a tour. Remember when we did a show on a battleship? Yeah. There's submarines like that. You got to go on a submarine, though? To go on a tour. It's like a tour. Remember when we did a show on a battleship?

Yeah. There's submarines like that. You got to go on a submarine? What was I doing? I don't know. We weren't married at the time. Oh, yeah. I'm sure we were on a break.

Oh, man. We were fucking all kinds of other people. You were probably off with Nicole Byer somewhere. Yeah, that's true. A couple people in the chat are confirming they've been on a sub. Really? Yeah. That's already more than I would have thought.

So it's like, you know, like when you go to Hawaii, I know you could like take a helicopter up. Yeah. This is that, but underwater. So just a guy owns a submarine and he'll drive you around? No, no, you don't get to go around in it. It's like a tour of a docked old submarine. Yeah, it's like a submarine from World War II.

But that limits you to people who live in port towns. There's a coastal bias. Port Arthur, Texas. Real coastal bias. I just feel like the submarine is a very... If you're trying to get your numbers up... We are.

We're trying to beat... I think it's a good... If you're trying to beat bowling shoes and uh fezzes does anything come to mind immediately amy do you have something well that's rare but maybe but not so rare it's like you're looking for a real sweet spot we are looking for a sweet spot because you know i mean there's always a source of ways you could beat fezzes but that's true yeah i mean how many people have listened to a dumb fucking podcast we destroy with that we would destroy huh let's see how many okay how many people yeah have been in a cover band you think that's going to be more than they've been in a submarine yes yeah but we're talking about a cover band that has done a show for real. That has played a show.

Where they got paid. Well, I don't know if we can. How many, Amy, when do you start getting paid? But they got paid anything. Did you get paid in beer? I'm talking about free drinks. Free drinks. Free drinks counts.

Yeah, free drinks. Yeah. You know, you played your family reunion. But I'm not just talking about. I think that counts if you play a family event. Yeah. Yeah, a band that has played in front of people. Yeah.

Like a wedding counts. A wedding counts. House party doesn't count unless you get paid, though. Okay. No, that's in front of people. What if you were in the movie House Party? Are there so many people who have been in bands? So many people who have been in bands.

Okay. So either you got paid to do the house party or if it's in a club, free drinks counts. But free drinks at a house party does not count because all drinks at a house party or if it's in a club, free drinks counts. But free drinks at a house party does not count because all drinks at a house party are free. Because that's basically

a rehearsal with your dumb friends. Yeah. Okay. But if you got paid to do a house party, if it's a house concert. I accept your strictures.

Yeah. Okay. I think even with that, even with that, because I think we have a lot of musicians. Yeah. I think we have a lot

of creative people. Right. Creatives, we call them. I hate it. I hate it. As soon as it came out of my mouth. Oh, boy. You know, we're creatives who make content.

I hate it. I love content. I'm passionate about content. I love creative content. I just wrote a musical about Pringles. Really? Cool. Cats are going to do it live on Facebook.

That sounds really good. Shit, I would watch that content. Cats from the Musical Cats. I would absolutely watch that. Sounds like pretty good content. Do we want to go? Are we okay with cover band? You know what? I like this. Jordan.

Because I feel like it's hard to play a show, to play an instrument well enough that you're playing in a band, you're rehearsing an entire set of material. That's not that easy. I'm taking on both of you. This is a band, you're rehearsing an entire set of material. That's not that easy. I'm taking on both of you. This is a tripartite fight. Okay. This is a three-way, a throuple, if you will.

Uh-huh. I will not. Thank you. Continue. You'll never recapture what you have. Are you thumbs-upping the cover band? I've got to have been in a submarine. Wait, what? I've to have been in a submarine. Wait, what?

What? I've got to have been in a submarine. Oh, you, I don't understand. What are you trying to say? You guys have a cover band. He played a gig in a submarine, I think is what he's saying. Oh, cool. His band played in a submarine.

How are the acoustics in there? You guys have, the click track was weird. It was more of a ping, ping, ping track. Oh, sure. That's the sonar. That's probably the sonar. Oh, so are we doing submarine and cover band? And we're seeing what wins next week?

Okay, we're going head to head. We're winning. We're gonna win! Man and Morris! But remember, cover band, you have to have been paid. Okay? Okay. And drink tickets count as payment, but only if you would otherwise have to pay for the drinks.

Yeah, you have to play in a public place. Yeah. Or if it's for friends and family, you have to have gotten paid. So like talent shows. What were the rules again? If it's for friends and family family you have to have gotten paid. What about like a battle of the bands type situation? You have to have won so that you get money.

You have to have won. Alright. Won or placed. Okay. You know, you have to have earned money from the show. If you lost and you went home with nothing But you're still in a band, even if you You're in a band. Well, good for you. I'm not saying it's not worth doing. I'm saying it doesn't count we're not qualifying the submarine saying it has to go somewhere okay fine mine is how many

people have been in a fucking boat you were constricting art to that which gets paid yeah well you're constricting submarines to that which is not at dis. Yes, that's right. It's true. Okay, quick question about subs. Somebody brought up that there's a submarine in a museum in Chicago that does... It's not in the water. That counts. It doesn't have to be in the water. That absolutely counts.

Okay. 100% counts. But the ones... I'll give you your dry sub. The ones that... That's also his sex act. The ones at Disneyland... I'm just a dry sub.

The ones at Disneyland don't count. Okay. I'm a dry sub looking for a wet Dom. And there's probably one at Disney World. Yeah. For it to count, if it's at a theme park, it can't be on like a track. It has to be an actual. It has to be real.

It has to be in use. At some point. Through some sort of military or exploratory mission. That's what we've been on a mission. Let's say that. This is only cover bands, not regular bands. Of course not regular bands.

I'm not talking about a mix of originals and covers. You have originals. Too many rules. This is a cover band. Cover bands don't play originals. They play the hits of the 80s. You can throw in a couple of originals.

You have to primarily be known for your covers. Maximum two originals. If you are. Oh, my. If you're in Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, that counts. You must provide your set list. Yeah, right. Picture of the set list.

Just his rules. Picture of the set list must be provided. I think we're going to have a great horse race here. I think this is going to be very exciting. JJGo at MaximumFun.org We've already confused everybody on the cover band rules. No, the cover band rules are simple. You have to have gotten paid.

Either through drinks that would otherwise cost money. Or happiness. Or money. Or yes. No. Or joy. Or money. You have to have creative fulfillment. Camaraderie. By the way. You've fulfilled yourself. By the way, I have something I'd like to address with our friend Amy Mann. Yes. Amy came on the Judge John Hodgman podcast, sister show here at MaximumFun.org, and declared that the worst song of all time was Come on Eileen.

It's pretty bad. By Dexys Midnight Runners, which is a fucking awesome song. I like it too. Here we go again. Come on, Eileen. It's pretty bad. By Dexys Midnight Runners, which is a fucking awesome song. I like it, too. I like it, too. I'm sorry. Now, I happen to have... Scramperdy doo,

da ba la boo da boo. See, I don't know. You're making your case. I don't know. I don't disagree. Do you know what? That Ted Leo, just this last week,

played in a Dexys Midnight Runners tribute band. So, I stewed over this, Jordan. Did you know what? That Ted Leo, just this last week, played in a Dexter Smith Nightrunner's tribute band. So I stewed over this, Jordan. Did you feel betrayed? No, because he probably improved it and he looks good in overalls. I bet he does look really good in overalls, actually. I stewed over it for six weeks from when we recorded to when the episode was released. When the episode was released in a combination of venting and self-promotion, I mentioned that Amy had denigrated

this song, one of my favorite songs, and that I had been stewing over it for six weeks, which was true. Because obviously while I am a professional culture critic, I have no claim to authority

relative to Amy Mann on this subject. And so I felt backed into a corner. You know, was it appropriate for me to take that public? Maybe not. I don't know. You know, it's hard to say. But I had big feelings, as they say,

and I needed to get them out. A lot of people are on your side. Someone immediately said there's only one person who can decide this, at Ted Leo. Ted Leo immediately replied, I'm playing in a Dexys Midnight Runners cover band this weekend. That was pretty great. So Ted could call in and be a.4 cover band.

Yes. Okay, cover bands, 206-984-4FUN or jjgoatmaximumfun.org. People who have been in submarines, jjgoatmaximumfun.org, 206-984-4FUN. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse Go. It's Jordan, Jesse Go. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, hip layer. And all it does is highlight her handsome neckerchief. It's a nice neckerchief. It's a nice owl shirt. Thank you. I like a scarf. Hey, we talked about the pledge drive. Why you should donate morally.

Now we're here to talk about the stuff. Let's get that stuff. R.I.P. the director of the stuff. We just died this weekend. Check out the stuff. Great movie about yogurt. Check out the stuff. Great movie about yogurt. Check out this. Is that the one that had our old co-host Gene's dad in it?

Yeah, Gene's dad is in the stuff. Yeah. Awesome. Anyway. Hey, so for five bucks a month, if you go to MaximumFun.org slash donate, you can get, and I think we confirmed this on the last episode, over 200 hours of bonus content. Including. We did an all Q&A episode this year with Sarah Morgan.

Yeah. A hoot and a half. Tons of fun. You can hear the show that we recorded on MacArthur Park Lake in a paddle boat. And then we said, Brian, cut that down as much as possible because it's hard to podcast on a paddle boat. that down as much as possible because it's hard to podcast on a paddleboat uh amy you guys recorded an episode of uh of your podcast uh that is specifically for donors tell us a little bit about that it's uh with ria butcher we also have a we did a bonus content um we have a song that ted and i wrote and recorded we did it a while back and we never released it called getting gray

so we just um said uh you know let's let's uh, you know, let's toss it in for the fun drive. That's serious. Yeah. That is a very good perk. Yeah. Hot dang. Yeah. Let's not talk about any of the rest of the things.

Yeah. I'm just going to top that. I do love those Manlio collaborations. They are so good. We're the newbies, so we have to try harder. Yeah. That's true. Well, hey, five bucks a month bonus content.

Any donor can get that at any time. Easy to do, but there's also some other good stuff if you want to give a little bit more. Yeah, at $10 a month, you get one of our enamel pins. There's one for every Maximum Fun program. Ours features the Destroy the West robot. And, of course, our classic catchphrase, Glug Glug. Glug Glug. Which is short for Glug Glug that high yellow.

Yep. Sure is. Sorry, Amy. There's a bubble pin that says Laser Dong on it. Oh, it's so cool, too. Very cool. It is really cool. Yeah.

Yeah, and if we hit our donation goal, our membership goal of 25,000 new and upgrading donors, we will make those pins available to all $10 a month and up members for purchase with all the proceeds going to charity. Hey, that's awesome. Yeah. We raised over $100,000 doing that last year. It was absolutely incredible. Wow. So let's see. What do we got for $20 a month?

We got something out there for $20 a month, Jesse? Oh, yeah. We have this beautiful custom puzzle designed by Jeffrey Tice. It features a lone podcast listener gazing out across the view from our office. It is the real view from our office made even more beautiful by Jeffrey. And I have gotten so much feedback specifically about how genuinely gorgeous this picture is. And, you know, 550 pieces. That's the perfect family project. Absolutely. For $35 a month, you get a beautiful glass coffee mug with the MaxFunRocket logo.

Plus, of course, the puzzle and the pin and the bonus content. All these are cumulative. You mean to tell me that if you donate at a higher level, you get everything below that level as well? Yeah, for some reason you do. Cool. 50 bucks a month, you get a metal engraved Max Fund membership card personalized with your name.

And there are more levels if you want to go higher. A lot of really cool stuff. Oh, for $100 a month, membership in the Inner Circle, where you get a cool piece of pop culture from a MaxFun host. I just actually picked something out for the Inner Circle members. I picked out a movie called Soul Power, which is a documentary of the concert that went along with the Rumble in the Jungle in Zaire in the 1970s that features an absolutely unbelievable performance from Celia Cruz and the Fania All-Stars and a totally gorgeous performance from Bill Withers

and a breathtaking, like stunning punch in the face of a performance from a very mustachioed james brown with an enormous belt buckle on his jumpsuit that says gfos for godfather of soul it is a amazing it is like what's great about it is it's like right at the end of james brown it's like 1974 something 75 it's like right at the end of his relevance. Uh, I mean, obviously he will forever be relevant, but right at the end of his peak. Uh, but what's great about that is you get to enjoy the fact that he's a little husky and has a giant mustache,

but you still get all the hits, everything that you wish James Brown would play. He can play because he recorded, like, except for, I guess, living in America, but like all of his songs are in the catalog by then.

And it is just like a mind blowing performance. So, yeah, lots of good stuff. If you go to Maximum Fund dot org slash donate a quick word about the bonus content. One of the things you can listen to the Boco, the Boco. One of the things you can listen to in that donor feed is an is a special one time only podcast that John Hodgman and I recorded last year. It's called Shooting the Breeze, B-R-I-E-S. And it is us talking about our time working in the cheese industry, something we both did. Wow.

We actually both worked in cheese shops. Specifically, you both mongered cheese. Past cheesers. Yes, we're a couple of former cheesers, current crackers. Coincidentally, you also both played for the Green Bay Packers. Yeah, it was a lot of weird parallels with me and Hodgman. Yeah. I was a spokesman for ColecoVision.

Oh, wow. So we're basically the same guy. No, so kind of, you know, that was a big hit. Yeah. Of the bonus content, it's the one I hear about the most. And, you know, we kind of looked at the outcry and we're like, well, we said we would do this once, but it was so popular. Maybe we'll do it again. And we said if we got twenty five hundred new Jordan Jesse go subscribers would record another episode of shooting the breeze episode two. Maybe we would reach out to people who had cheese based last names. last names. John Hodgman did some preliminary work trying to book a certain captain that everybody enjoys. Maybe she has a cat that has the same name as one mentioned earlier in the show. And I think a lot of people have been excited about that prospect.

And if we can't book the captain, we will book Tennille. We will book Tennille. Get Tennille in here. Yeah. Tennille Gruyere. Yeah. Get Tennille in here. Yeah. Tennille Gruyere. Yeah. So we've had a lot of great support this drive.

Love hearing from the fans. Love people upgrading. You know, it's been successful. But as far as that goal of $2,500 for the new episode, we ain't even close. Really? Yeah. Not even close. It's sad. Well, MaximumFun.org slash donate.

We've got gotta make this happen i need to see your extra cheese material please don't deprive amy of our extra cheese material i need additional cheese material from you and hodgman i well i mean get out i mean like let's just encourage people to get out there at maximumfund.org donate and just have a stronger showing this week i don't know what to say i mean're not just going to do it for the heck of it. We need people to get out there and support this thing, this cheese thing. This might come right down to the wire. You're hosting a live streaming show at MaximumFun.org on Friday night, Friday from 4 to 6 p.m. Pacific, along with Helen Hong and dozens of MaxFun hosts, including myself.

And I think we might find out then whether we make that goal. Well, I don't know. People just got to get out there. I'm excited about the drive. It's been going great. But this particular aspect could use a little work. You know what else I just saw? Our friend Elliot Kalin, one of the hosts of the Flophouse, and our friend John Hodgman, the host of Judge John Hodgman, have made a pact. If we hit our goal of 25,000 new and upgrading donors, they will make a donors-only miniseries where they watch the 70s miniseries iClaudius together. Wow.

Yeah. Okay. That's the dream. That's how you motivate people, Amy. That is absolutely the dream. Yeah. I mean, from here, where? Wow.

Upstairs, downstairs? Amy, how many donors? Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, the BBC version? Amy, how many donors will we have to get for you to go through all of Mannix? Mannix is a rough ride. I will go through all of canon all on my own. Okay. Man watches canon.

Man on canon. What would it take for you to go through the Rough Riders canon? So that would be like Stop, Drop, Roll. Sure. What else would be a top?

What would a big Rough Riders hit? Listen, I will write a song about your cat for, I don't know, name an amount. Speak Chinese like Jim. Does anybody else

besides the two of us want this cat song? No, I think the list, listen, if you want Chinese like Jing. Does anybody else besides the two of us want this cat song? No, I think the list, listen, if you want this, man's put the cat song on the table. I want it. You want it. Yeah. Get out there. So let's say, you know what?

Let's do this. We'll find a goal for this. And if we hit a certain amount of subscribers, we'll do the cat song. Yeah. I'll come in and do harmonies or gang vocals. I'll have a cat song by the end of the week. Great. Done.

This is both of our shows collaborating together. So I say let's make this the overall goal. Okay. If we're able to get to 25,000 new and upgrading Max Fund donors, Amy Mann will write a song about Jordan's cat and record it. Absolutely. Okay. This is incredible.

You heard it here first. What a thrill. It would be record it. Absolutely. Okay. This is incredible. You heard it here first. What a thrill. It would be a thrill. This is a momentous occasion. Should we take a momentous occasion? Let's hear a momentous occasion. Hi, Jordan, Jesse, Go. This is Hugo.

And I was calling you in because of the Polly discussion. Pause this, Brian. Because of the Polly discussion, discussion you know on all your episodes i thought maybe he had polyps oh no i was worried for the guy no he's probably polyamorous okay yeah almost all of our listeners we're pretty sure our polyamorous at this point. Or polyamorous aspirational. I am not technically in a couple. Me and my boyfriend are poly, though. And the total number of people in our polycule, which is what you call, like,

all the whole, like, is what you call like all the whole like just everybody who's dating everybody. You seem like such sweeties to make up. There's 13 people. 13? I'm only personally dating one of them.

My boyfriend's dating about four, I think. Uh, but yeah. Uh, there's always a lot of people to play board games. In general, it's pretty cool. There are a lot of shared calendars. That seems to be the main thing.

A lot of Google calendars being shared. Anyway, love the show. Bye. What's that thing called, like a bumble, where you send somebody and they mark their availability? I don't know. If you're trying to have a meeting, you send it to them and they mark their availability? Yeah. Do you think they all live in one house?

No, I don't think so. I bet everybody. Maybe this guy and his boyfriend cohabitate, but I don't know if everybody in the polycule lives in some sort of polycule crash pad.

I'm glad that they use the Google calendars because honestly, before that, I was imagining that thing with the Polaroids and the corkboard and the red yarn.

Oh, right. Exactly. That's how I was imagining everyone keeping track of it. Amy, how many listeners to The Art of Process do you think are polyamorous? God, I don't know. It's hard to speculate on our audience. Do we have an audience?

I don't know. Jesse would have to tell us that. Honestly, I haven't heard any other podcasts before. Really? Yeah. Well, you should try them out. They're great. A lot of fun for your commute.

I don't know. I'm mostly into Stern. Oh, yeah. Sure. That's why you got XM. Baba Booey. Oh, you got us. You got us.

Boy, 13. That is a lot. That's a lot of dating. When I think about the act of dating, this isn't someone you slip in on the late night. This is like, oh, we go to dinner. And every other one, you got to do something a little bit fun. So you may do mini golf or, oh, there's a- Ice skating rink in a park downtown.

Outdoor movie. You know what this sounds like? a, there's a, you know. Ice skating rink in a park downtown. Outdoor movie. You know what this sounds like? A full-time job. Yeah. It's a full-time job. That's a lot of dating. Having all these datings. You have to be passionate.

You have to be passionate about dating. It's too much. I think. It's too much. What we're talking about. It's just a lot of energy. I don't think it's. And juggling and planning.

I don't think it even is the dates. I bet they do juggle on their dates. I bet the dating scene involved actual juggling. That boyfriend with four partners definitely knows how to juggle. Oh, he definitely knows how to juggle. That dude's a juggling fool. Oh, yeah. A boy can juggle.

Yeah. Well, hey. Get you a man who juggles. Right. Do you think, well, I mean, do you think, wow, do you think Get you a man who juggles. Right. Do you think... Well, I mean, do you think... Wow, do you think this is a clown polycule? Do you think they all go out on dates in one little car?

I don't know. Did he say where he was calling from? Did I hear... I heard a southern accent. Washington, D.C.? A southern accent. Oh, okay. Yeah, it was a southern accent, so probably the deep south somewhere.

Maybe not the deep south. Maybe the shallow south. That's Washington, D.C., baby. Yeah, D.C. is very shallow south. Okay, all right. Enough of your political commentary there. I'm an incendiary satirist like Borowitz from the Borowitz Report. Or John Steps from the Capitol Steps.

Yeah. Anyway, I don't countenance these grease-painted fools. All right, all right. In our nation's capital. Enough, enough, enough scorching satire. These flap-shoed yahoos. Flap-shoed. Yeah.

The clown. Oh, the clown. Maybe put down the seltzer bottle and pick up a legislative pen to write legislation with. I'm getting hot. Can I take off my t-shirt? I know. We should have brought more layers in to take off. Yeah, I know, right? Only if you have an owl tattoo underneath.

We got one more call. Let's take one more call. Hey, Jordan, Jesse, and I'm guessing Steve Agee. Nope. I guess this is a momentous occasion. It was almost a moment of death. I just lit up my grill

to fire up some brats that I had purchased and the propane tank caught on fire. My wife yelled out, oh my god, turn the grill off! So I turned the grill off and grabbed my dog and fucking ran. And we're both alive.

The fire extinguished itself. But anyways, hard as a rock and wet as a river, I suppose. Thanks. But unfortunately, five members of his polycule were killed. The explosion got a brat in the eye. Oh, man. This happened one time when I was grilling with my dad, and my dad had had too many beans for lunch. Okay.

All right. All right. World's largest source of natural gas If you know what I mean I do know We know We've been in this room with your dad before That's when your dad

Have a podcast together Nicole Byer drops by sometimes No shit, she's good in everything She's good in everything She's got that Netflix show She's doing great Yep, real funny A lot of energy It's good in everything. It's good in everything. You can always count on her. She's got that Netflix show. She's doing great. Yep.

Real funny. A lot of energy. Tons of energy. It helps because my dad is pretty senile. Got a paper over that. Oh, we know. Love you, Dad. He's not listening. Nah.

No, doesn't care. Well, if you have something momentous happen to you, 206-984-4FUN is the number to call or email us at jjgoe at MaximumFun.org. Just send us a voice memo. Just send us a voice memo. Do it. Just send us a voice memo. And, hey, if you're not already a member of MaximumFun.org, it's easy. MaximumFun.org slash donate is where you go.

And here's the thing, Jordan. Don't fuck around with this. No, don't. Please don't. This is like a propane tank. Do not fuck around. That's why you have that polycule. Yeah.

Fuck around there. Yeah, fuck around in the cule. Not here. Get up in that cule. Yeah. Get up in them cule guts. All right. Maximumfund.org slash donate.

It's Jordan, Jesse Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Amy Mann, still nicknameless. Amy Mann, do you know how to play the piano? I play a little bit. I'm trying to write songs on piano, and it's very frustrating because I'm terrible at it, but I'm sitting there hammering away. If there was somebody who knew how to play piano good enough to be an accompanist, I would sing a song from The Music Man for donors. Wow.

We're getting donors a lot of cool stuff on this episode. Do we know somebody? You're really throwing down. Yeah, throwing down. I guess they would have to have a piano in the studio, too. Yeah, you'd have to have a piano. Are you saying if somebody comes to the live stream on Friday with a piano, you'll sing something from The Music Man? Wait, just like off the fucking dome with no practice?

Well, you have between now and then. Yeah, you have time. You have a couple days. If they bring a piano to the live stream, yeah, I'll do it. Okay. What about a keytar? A keytar? Oh, yes. They should totally bring a keytar. Now you have to have a keytar? A keytar. Oh, yes.

They should totally bring a keytar. Now you have to have a keytar. You got to. Please. We could probably do, if we're looking to beat Fez, we could probably do has a keytar. It'll probably run away. Bees, those in your cover band, right? Anyway.

I feel like you can't really play a song from the Music Man on the guitar. I mean, he's a gifted guitarist. Absolutely. It would be weird. It would be tough to arrange it for guitar. A keytar could be an interesting twist. It could be. Amy, if you had to kill Hugh Jackman to be in one Broadway musical, do you have one off the top of your head?

Assassins? That'd be fitting. How fitting? off the top of your head? Assassins. That'd be fitting. How fitting? I like,

my favorite musicals are Cabaret and Chicago. I like musicals that start with C. And Book of Mormon also was very good. Yeah. B is close to C. It's very close. Very close. But none of them are murderable. I think because I don't really have that urge to act.

Ah, sure. There's a little bit of acting involved. And singing on stage. I don't know. I don't have the pipes. I don't have the projection. Jordan, Amy gets hired to act even though she doesn't really want to. That should be our career goal. You got to say yes to stuff. You got to say yes. Yeah. The dress. Got to say yes to. You got to say yes to stuff. You got to say yes. Yeah. The dress. Got to say yes to that.

Got to say yes to the dress. Being in the Versace show. You got to say yes to that. Have to say yes. And when Portlandia comes a-calling. Yep. Anyway, these are the things you got to say yes to. One, two, three.

Yes. Oh, I thought we were all going to say yes at the same time. I like that. Yeah. I was counting the number of things you have to say yes at the same time I like that yeah I was counting the number of things you have to say yes oh okay I thought we were all

going to in unison say yes to life yeah to love to wine to food L'chaim

L'chaim Amy yes The Art of the Process is now on MaximumFun.org it is people should listen to it they really should

I feel like you could get something out of it. We mentioned the Rhea Butcher bonus episode. Yes, that was a good one. Who else? Who do you got in the maid feed there? In the what? In the main feed. Oh, like who have been some of your favorite guests?

Who have we already had? Yes. Sorry to drop that podcast link. My mind has suddenly gone blank because it's too hot in here. It's not working. That's true. It is making me forget who has been on this show, too. No, my brain has to be chilled like a computer.

Barack Obama. Barack Obama. That's right. You call him Barry, of course. Nelson Mandela. Mm-hmm. He's a ghost. PewDiePie.

PewDiePie. Oh, he's good in everything. His creative process is really revelatory. Right. Itie. PewDiePie. Oh, he's good in everything. His creative process is really revelatory. It's a strange one. Yeah. Play Minecraft and have views.

Yeah. You and Ted are two of my favorite creative people. Thank you. And the fact that you guys have a podcast talking about creativity

is a real thrill. Now I have to look at my list. I literally can't remember. My mind has gone blank. brian you can chime in who who have been some people on the show sure wyatt sinek uh rebecca sugar that's right uh dan wilson looks like the most recent one now i recall the mariners catcher uh dan wilson was in uh semisonic and he also he's one of those guys who writes who is like a co-writer like one of those like hit writer guys that you know artists are put with with him to write these gigantic hit songs with four choruses in a row and he has a really fantastic sense of melody and i've known him since uh we were in bands together in Boston, like in the 80s. And I just always thought he was so good and so ahead of his time.

How many originals did you play in the band? All right. Two or more? I always played originals. I'm not good enough to be in a cover band. You have to, that's like a chops. Yeah, that's a chops thing. He's good enough, Jordan.

Pure chop. Man's got chops. You know, you play in like an arty punk band. You just literally do whatever kind of garbage you feel like doing. And nobody is the wiser. That's why I liked it. Maximumfun.org to get that podcast. Maximumfun.org slash donate to donate to all of the shows.

So let's go over what's been thrown down here. 25,000 new members. Jamie will write a song about Jordan's cat bug. 2,500 new Jordan Jesse Go subscribers. Hodgman and I will talk about Cheese on a new episode of Shooting the Breeze. It's not looking good, but who knows? I believe in Jordan Jesse Go listeners. They're listening right now, aren't they?

Maybe people will come through. Look, we put out a whole extra episode during the Max Fun Drive, and it was a fucking good one. It was a banger. That was a fucking dope one. Somebody tweeted at me. This is just for people who only listen to Jordan, Jesse, go on Monday, and they haven't gone back to listen to the one we put out on Friday. But somebody tweeted me that it was the best live podcast episode ever. Whoa.

Yeah, no fucking shit. Tony Hale, John Roderick, great episode. Tony Hale, that guy's an ego. Just for you on the MaxFunDrive. Yeah, the live stream on Friday, right? It's Friday, 4 to 6 p.m., 4 p.m. Pacific to 6 p.m. Pacific or 7 p.m. Eastern to 10 p.m. Eastern. You can find it at MaximumFun.org. It's going to be a hoot and a half. I don't want to interrupt your thing.

No, no, please. John Roderick, I guarantee you, has been in a submarine. Yeah. There's no doubt, right? John, let us know. He might live in one. He might live in one. I see your guarantee, Amy. John Roderick, I guarantee you, has never listened to a podcast. That's probably true. That sounds very much like him.

Well, hey, hit us up on Twitter. If you're John Roderick, let us know if you've been in a submarine. I can text him right now and find out. Would you please? Yeah, please text John Roderick. We need this question answered. Find out if he's ever been in a submarine. God, we need to know the answer to this question.

We got to. I mean, he certainly podcasted about submarines on Friendly Fire, right? Sure. Oh, yeah? One would imagine. Yeah, that's their favorite genre. Ben Harrison and I, years before Friendly Fire even existed, shared deep conversations about how by far the best genre of movie is submarine movie.

Sure. U-571. Even U-571. movie is Submarine. Sure. U-571. Even U-571. A C-movie at best is a B, B-plus movie because it's in a submarine. Very enjoyable film.

Very enjoyable film. And a good film in a submarine, Das Boot. One of the all-time greats. Okay. Das Boot. Well, let us know your favorite submarine movie. Hit us up on Twitter. If Amy gets an answer to this Roderick submarine question, maybe we'll break back in and let you know the answer. But yeah, until then, should we say goodnight?

Yeah, MaximumFun.org slash donate. Do become a member of Maximum Fun. That really is how we make this show and why we make this show. Don't fuck around and not do it. Do actually do do it. If you have sat there and listened to an hour and 40 minutes or whatever of this bullshit, you owe it to yourself to put five bucks in the tiller. It's tip and time.

Time to tip. Tip and time. Tip and time. And maybe that will be my new nickname. Oh, yeah, the next time you're back. Amy, tip of time man. Time for tips. Tip of tap of toe.

Brian Sonny D. Fernandez is our producer. Our thanks to him. Thanks to everybody at MaximumFun.reddit.com, the Reddit group where people are really jamming on the MaxFunDrive. Thanks to everybody who follows us on Twitter, at Amy Mann, A-I-M-E-E-M-A-N-N, and Jordan underscore Morris and Jesse Thorne. Thanks to everybody who joins us on Facebook,

where we are live streaming tonight's episode, or this episode, I should say. Goodbye, Facebook. We love you so much. Just search for Jordan Jesse Go there and hit like or join the Maximum Fun group there. And oh shit, Jordan. We have one last announcement to make. What?

You're pregnant? I was about to wrap this thing up, but we have one last announcement to make. What is it? 2019 is the year of the Summer Boys of Summer Tour. Oh, that's right. We're going on tour. We're going on tour, baby. Starting in June at some point, right?

Yeah, we're going on tour in June. We're going to New York City. We're going to Washington, D.C. Oh, yeah. We're going to... Portland, Seattle. Austin? Austin, Texas.

Yeah. We're going to Chicago, Illinois. We're going to Minneapolis, Minnesota. Come check us out. It's going to be a lot of fun. Los Angeles, California to Chicago, Illinois. We're going to Minneapolis, Minnesota. Come check us out. It's going to be a lot of fun. Los Angeles, California. Boston, Massachusetts. The summer boys of summer are coming your way, America.

This is our first tour in over 100 years. Yes, that's right. Jordan no longer has a lucrative and inflexible employment in the field of television. I finally have my youngest child just barely old enough that my wife will let me get away for five days at a time. It is going to be an extravaganza. MaximumFun.org, you and only you and also other members of MaximumFun.org will get exclusive pre-access to tickets to the Summer Boys of Summer Tour 2019. First crack at those ticks. Yeah. You're going to get into the front of the VIP line?

Yeah, probably. MaximumFun.org slash donate. If there is a VIP line. Who knows? We don't know. If there's any VIPs at the show for some reason. Yeah. That's going to be great. There's any VIPs at the show for some reason. Yeah. That's going to be great.

It's going to be tons of fun. Yeah. We're looking forward to it. Hope everybody comes out to those. Yeah. Keep your eyes peeled on the social meds for deets. And go to MaximumFun.org slash donate to get first crack at those tickets. We'll talk to you next time on Jordan, Jesse, go.

MaximumFun.org. crack at those tickets. We'll talk to you next time on Jordan, Jesse, go.