Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 655: Deep Dry Hug with Steve Agee

Episode Date: September 23, 2020

Steve Agee (The Suicide Squad 2, Superstore) joins Jordan and Jesse for a discussion of what it was like being King Shark in the new Suicide Squad movie, Jesse's disappointing experience at a Harlem Globetrotters game in the past, and Jordan's brief run-in with Joan Osborne in his youth.The Bubble graphic novel is available for pre-order! Check with your local indie bookstore or get it on Amazon!

Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you. It's Jordan Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. How are you, friend? Well, I just wanted to say welcome home to you. Welcome home to you, Jesse. Welcome to your second podcast home. Welcome home to the listeners. Welcome home to Brian, our producer. And yeah, just welcome to everybody. If you're within earshot, welcome home. Can I kind of piggyback off that, Jordan? Do you mind? You know, I mean, I don't love it when you steal my thunder.

I don't love it. I don't love it. But because we're home. Right. Because home is where the heart is. Yeah. Home is where you can really be you. If you feel like you have to steal my thunder,

I'll allow it because we're home. Welcome home. I hate stealing anyone's thunder. The only time I've ever done it was when I briefly stole the thunder from Down Under. You kidnapped an entire

erotic male strip review? Yeah. But again, briefly. Okay. I just wanted to see what they had, and then I let them go. Okay. All right, fellows. I know you can't show the crank on stage, but...

So just whip it out here for me in this van, and I'll let you get back. I just want to say, piggybacking on what you said, Jordan. You said welcome home. Welcome home. I just want to say to the audience, to you, to our guest on the program, to Brian, our producer, to my dog, who's in a pile of sweatshirts in the corner of my closet, I want to say, mi casa es su casa. International. I like that. That's how a Spaniard would say, my home is your home. Can I tell you why I'm so inspired to say welcome home? And I might start saying it at the top of every episode. You can tell me. I mean, I just assumed it's because I'm wearing sweatpants,

but go ahead. So there's a couple of places in my life that I've heard welcome home, you know, apart from my home. Olive Garden. Olive Garden. Well, that's when you're here, you're family. Yeah. Yeah, if you try and sleep in an Olive Garden. Trust me. Yeah.

I ate too much, too many breadsticks one time i thought i was family passed out right there on the floor i got sleepy from the chicken parm uh welcome home they say it to you as you're entering burning man welcome home okay there's the person there's the steampunk uh ballerina goblin that checks your ticket. Okay. They say, welcome home. Right. They say it to you before you go in the Magic Castle, the kind of members-only magic club in Hollywood. As you're entering the secret door, they say, welcome home.

Well, members only, that's a stretch. I would say members right friends of members people invited by members and large groups of employees from a country club in orange county that's based exclusively on our experience going to see our friend matt ricardo there very very drunk and very very blonde and if there's anybody that you want to be seated near during a performance it's the employees of an orange county country club just great great great observers yeah so okay so there's two places welcome you know burning man um the magic castle and so you know i think kind of what links these two things is like you know these are kind of like you're in

the know type places and like you know these are places outside of like normal society where you can you know let your freak flag fly right Right. Like sort of Olive Garden type places. Yeah, like a real Olive Garden. Yeah. And so, but I absolutely see the importance and the appeal of that. You know, it's nice to know that, you know, you can go somewhere and be with your people. Like, these are my people. You know, this isn't my, you know, this is my chosen family.

These are my people. I've only felt that way one time in my life, Jordan. Okay. And it wasn't in my family of origin. It's not in my family of choice now. It was when I briefly kidnapped the Thunder from Down Under. Sure. These people and their athletic peni.

This week I saw Welcome Home in a third place. Yeah. So now it's been Burning Man. Number one. The Magic Castle. Number two. And it is now on the door of Carl's Jr. Welcome home.

Welcome home. You can fucking house that Western bacon cheeseburger without judgment. You are home. These are people who prefer criss-cut fries to regular fries, even though the regular fries are pretty good. These are people who are Hardee's, east of the Rockies. Right. Yeah, I don't know. I wonder if you're are people who are Hardee's east of the Rockies. Right. Yeah, I don't know. I wonder if you're welcoming you home to Hardee's. If we have any listeners,

please go to your local Hardee's and let us know if they've added welcome home to the door. Yeah, and let me add this. If we have any listeners, let us know because we've been presuming on, we've been going forward on the assumption that we do not.

Right, yeah. If we have listeners, we will do our best to improve the show. Yeah. Perhaps by introducing things such as content or format. All right, don't go nuts. Talking about a regular segment with the Thunder from Down Under, where they just rub their peens on mics. Our guest on the program

is a stand-up comic, a podcaster in his own right, a gifted photographer, an art school graduate, probably best known as the sidekick on Diablo Cody's talk show, Steve Agee.

Oh, wow. Where did you come up with that? I know your credits, Steve. That's a deep cut, man. Well, you know. I didn't know. I guess I, unlike Jesse, don't have the knowledge of your resume that maybe I should. No, you shouldn't.

It never aired. What was your... I didn't know you did this. Tell us about what you did. What were your sidekick duties? She pitched an idea for a talk show. I believe it was AMC and we shot a pilot and it was really fun. pilot and um it was really fun and it was based on she did a web series uh of interviews from um her airstream that was parked in her on her property and so she pitched based on that and we did a pilot and somehow jesse knows about it jesse were you the guy at amc who axed this yeah i did you did it you said it was no turn washington spies that's why you were that's why you were axing it yeah

welcome home jesse yeah welcome home uh what were you wait so so you're you like sat on the couch next to her you like did you do any band leading no i don't this was so long ago i there was no band um there was like a pre-taped musical opening and then um yeah i think it was just a half hour show as well. But it wasn't in the Airstream. No, it was not. It was in a studio somewhere. Do you think that's probably why it didn't go? Yeah, I think it lost the charm outside of the Airstream. I'd love to.

Guys, I know this is a cliche, but God, I'd love to have an Airstream. I would too. Oh my God, me too. I think they're so cool and so beautiful. You could live like Matthew McConaughey or someone who sells fusion tacos in Portland. Yes, exactly. Fusion tacos.

I'm selling brisket tacos, barbecue brisket tacos out of my Airstream. Yeah. It has a ring to it, doesn't it? Sounds good. Steve, I saw you briefly in the kind of teaser trailer for The Suicide Squad. It was really exciting. Yeah, it's going to be awesome. I'm really excited that they finally showed something.

I mean, it's not going to be out until August of next year, but I was really, really excited that they had enough footage to release a pretty decent-sized behind-the-scenes little teaser. I don't know. I mean, this stuff is probably very protected by Warner Brothers, but I am totally fine. Yeah, burn it down, AG. Who gives a fuck?

Release the AG cut. Yeah. Where you can see King Shark's butthole. Oh, so much. So you're acting in this kind of apparatus, right? Well, it was very weird. It wasn't really motion capture it was reference because kingshark is fully cg'd but i mean there's no similarities between a human other than arms

and legs so it was really pointless to do motion capture so i would just stand there and they would act to me and they're gonna you know cut me out and put in a you know a computer generated shark man but they got you to do this yeah mocap process because of your sinuous grace because i was tall and willing to wear a 50-pound chest piece and weird bicycle helmet with a little balsa wood frame of a shark head on it. It was really weird. I mean, none of this is spoilery. It's all in that behind-the-scenes stuff that was released. I mean, you're willing to do that. I've paid $200 an hour to do that. I had to find someone on craig's list wow let me know next time i can hook you up uh this is an interesting jordan jesse go fun fact

for for the folks keeping track at home uh steve agey you'll be playing king shark in an upcoming film and john economist oh yeah oh cool okay great a dual role an actual where i you can see me steve agee in the skin wow pretty good like reflected in the skin is it a very shiny skin no it's it's my normal well i mean it's really white and so it's a little bit shiny got it uh i was watching the harley quinn show uh over there on hbo max it's a very funny show everything people say is true about that show it's really good uh king shark also in that voiced by ron funches ronald funches yeah who has also been on this show yeah and it got me thinking like are we the number one, the number one podcast destination for people who have played King Shark?

So far, I think you are. So this is interesting. So I kind of Googled King Shark on film. And we're missing one. We're missing one King Shark, I guess, on the Flash TV show, which I have seen a few of, but do not watch regularly. His voice is done by David Hader. Do you know who David Hader is?

No, I have seen a few episodes of that just because I wanted to see what their King Shark was like. And he's terrifying. He's probably like 20 feet tall. Yours will be smaller and more lovable. Yeah, yeah. Sort of like an amiibo level.

Yes, yes, for sure, for sure. So yeah, David Hayter, very interesting career. He is a celebrated voiceover actor. He does Solid Snake in most of the Metal Gear Solid games, although I think they replaced him with Kiefer Sutherland for the last one. Oh yeah, you're right. But he also is just like a screenwriter. he wrote like x-men 2 no way so anyway david hater interesting guy david hater come on jj go please we need the king shark hat trick uh is that a nor you guys are in show business. I'm in public radio. Right. Is that a normal career crossover

to be writing blockbuster films and also doing voices on The Flash? No, I don't think so. I think this guy legitimately has kind of an amazing, weird career. Like I know that like Nat Faxon has written some movies. You know what I mean? He's got an Oscar for it.

And Jim Rash, yeah. Yeah, that guy's no joke. But he's writing movies that are like directly comparable to the kind of acting work that he does. You know, charming, funny, snaggletoothed movies. You know what I mean? Snaggletoothed. Wait, he wrote that one with the George Clooney... The Descendants.

The Descendants, yeah. That's not Snaggletooth. Yeah. Everybody's got perfect pearly whites in that, Jesse. The dental work in this movie. But I'm impressed to learn that this King Shark is out here writing X-Men movies. I think Solid Snake, good job. Pretty impressive.

Sure. That's a beloved video game character. Our friend Sam is Spider-Man. What movies is he writing? You know what I mean? Yeah. Sam Riegel? Write an X-Men movie.

God damn it. Make it about Wendigo. Wendigo. Anyway, so yeah. If anybody out there knows Hater, we know he's got the fucking mic to do a podcast. Absolutely. That guy doesn't just have a podcast. That guy's got a fucking Neumann.

You know he's got a Neumann. You know he's got a Neumann. Yeah, he's got that foam padding all over. He's got an office with foam padding and wedges. Fucking Neumann and his foam. Now I'm the hater.

Fucking shock mount. You know that's what haters are about. Shock mount? What's he drinking? Warm tea? Yeah, eating green apples. That's a thing. Wait, is that a voiceover trick? I didn't know that. That is a thing in voiceover. They'll have like green apples. I don't know what it does, but it does something. Huh. Interesting. Look it up, Brian. Keeps the doctor away, I guess. It reminds you what apples are less good. I think it keeps your mouth from getting dried out.

Yeah, maybe. I mean, they're pretty filled with moisture. Last I had one. It's like it's supposed to keep away the mucus. Oh. There you go. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, mucus, that's the enemy of the voiceover actor, from what I understand.

Sort of like Lex Luthor in Superman. Yes, exactly. Like King Shark in Superboy. luther and superman yes exactly like king shark and superboy uh steve i always kind of like checking in with you where you are in your video game journey i think sometimes you're on them sometimes you're off them we're obviously living in very very video game heavy times i'm i was i found myself wondering how is ag doing during all this well i started early on i jumped on that animal crossing ah sure sure yeah which is pretty much you know fallen by the wayside and i i just spent uh a few weeks playing ghost of tsushima. Oh, yeah. On PlayStation, which was incredible. Loved it.

I called Nick Weiger a coward for not playing Sekiro last episode and playing that instead, so I'm going to go ahead and call you a coward too, even though I don't think anybody understands what I'm talking about. Anyway, play Sekiro, you coward. All right. It's great. That's cool. It's cool.

I'm a coward. But you liked it. He loved it, too. I think I'm mad at it because it's similar to a game that I think is harder. So I turned my nose up at it, but maybe I shouldn't have. Give it a shot. What else are you going to do? Here's the thing, Steve.

Fucking nothing. Exactly. I'm not going to do shit. I don't know. Yeah, sure. I might as well do that. Hey, have you guys been playing a lot of Baseball Mogul 2018? No, man.

I'm 2019, baby. They fixed all the bugs. You've mentioned this a couple times on the show, Jesse. I guess I forget what the... It's not a baseball game. It's like a baseball management game. Oh, my God. Yeah.

No, a baseball game would be too action-packed for me, Jordan. Sure. You don't need that. You just, like, trade guys and sign free agents. Oh, my God. It's Moneyball. It truly is. Oh, my God.

You're pretending you're Jonah Hill. Wow. Are they real baseball guys, or is it like in, you know, baseball stars for the NES where they make up kind of fakey-sounding American names? It's mostly real baseball guys, but the Ninja Black Sox are in there from baseball stars. They threw in the...

Is this on a video game system, or do you play with, like, playing cards? It's like solitaire. Yeah magic the gathering you play it in microsoft windows my friend microsoft windows nice nice os click click click that's the sound of that game i've been trying to get my daughter to play this game with me uh called all-star baseball and like i really i'm just really pushing for any of my children to like uh sports generally and baseball specifically just so that i can not feel like i am a bad person or parent when I am watching a sporting event. Does that make sense? Like if you can rope your children into it, then you're taking care of them and thus you're

parenting and being a good person. Whereas if you just do it while they hurt themselves in the next room, then you're a bad parent, right? Right. Sure. While they're in the other room scarfing down Tide Pods. Yeah. Have you taken them to an actual baseball game?

Yeah. A baseball game has been the most successful sporting event I've taken my children to. I've taken them to a couple of basketball things because football is not going to... Going to a football game is not going to convince anyone to like football. Going to a football game sucks. Yeah. And I say that as somebody who enjoys watching football on television. But going to a football game, you're so far away, nothing exciting.

It's nothing exciting about it. Like all the things that make it good on TV make it bad in real life. Right. You're not wearing a shirt. You've got the team logo body painted on your torso, et cetera. You don't have to do that, Jesse. Did you think that was required for entrance? Yeah, no, they make you do that, Jordan.

Have you ever been to a professional football game? Boy, I mean, it's been a while, honestly, so maybe the rules have changed. Yeah. I mean, maybe you been a while, honestly, so maybe the rules have changed. Yeah. I mean, maybe you didn't notice that was the rules because you happened to have gone during that one year when you always had your shirt off and Los Angeles Rams body painted on your torso. Yeah. Yeah, you know, honestly, now that you say that, it does. That actually lines up perfectly. That was junior year, I think, right?

Yeah, junior year, my Rams year. You never forget your Rams year, right? Everybody's got that Rams year. Rams year. But I've taken them to a couple of basketball games. I've gone to a few. We went to an LA Sparks game, which is the WNBA team. And we went to a UCLA women's basketball game. And we went to a Harlem Globetrotters game. Whoa, fun. So here's the

thing, Steve. No, not fun as an adult. The Harlem Globetrotters game was impressively not fun. I went as a kid and loved it. I know. I was so excited to go, Steve. The WNBA game and the UCLA women's basketball game were both pretty fun for me. And I loved that I bought tickets to each of them for like $8. Yeah. And I thought like any professional sporting event I can go to for $8, I'm in, it sounds great to me.

I just spend all the rest of the money on hot dogs. But the, the thing that you forget about a basketball game, if you're not regular, regular basketball game attendee, and I'm not, I'm not a, I'm not a millionaire, uh, is it is just assaultive. Like the level of intensity of noise and like blinking lights that goes on during a basketball game is so exhausting. And for my kids, you know, this is true for a lot of little kids, like they're so easily sensorily overwhelmed.

Like they basically just like started crying 10 minutes in and we had to leave like at halftime or just before were you was the harlem globe charters less game less fun because you were concerned at uh why no one was helping scooby-doo you know i'll tell you what i'll tell you why it was less fun um it's always more fun when your team is in the game and has a shot at winning and i'm a fourth generation generals fan sure right your day your day it's a you know it's a family thing your dad was one his dad was one you know my mom's from washington D.C. Right, right. You know how it is.

You know how it is. The Globetrotters game, it wasn't horrible, but my kids were not interested in the basketball tricks. They kind of liked the mascot, but they weren't interested in the goofy stuff that the players were doing and also it is a very odd mix of acting goofy and just regular basketball playing yeah it's it's obvious like it's an archaic thing like obviously it's something that they figured out in 1944 and have been doing for the past 65 years but it's just you can never tell is this going to be one of the parts where they don't really play basketball or where they kind of really play basketball? And it makes the kind of really playing basketball pretty dull. And then, but there's only so many times that you

can do the goofy, not basketball things and they have to play an entire basketball game. Is it really like a full length game? and they have to play an entire basketball game. Is it really like a full length game? Yes, they play an entire basketball game. And I think part of the time, at least, one of the teams is trying to win. Wow.

Just like occasionally they have a ladder. And then there's that whole quarter where they just answer questions about what it was like being trapped on Gilligan's Island. I'd like to hear that. I would actually, I would. I'm curious. Well, it's just like one guy is like 55 and like short and portly.

And that guy's just a guy that they can't fire for some reason. He's got something on somebody. He's Curly Joe's nephew. Yeah. He's a good kid. He's Meadowlark tangerine wow and that in that family their their first name is the same and their last names are all different uh different citruses

meadowlark lemon lime what was the last year here's a question for you guys what was the last year? Here's a question for you guys. What was the last like arena scale event that you went to and double points for it not being like the Beyonce concert or going to see you too or something. but like, have you guys been in the past 10 years to like a moto cross or, you know what i mean like one of those things that happens in it or like a cattle show i so i actually said just a quick tangent i have never been to like an arena music show i've never seen like uh you know billy joel at dodger stadium it's something i'd actually kind of like to do. I think I get the impression that maybe those suck,

but I think I kind of, like, grew up in a kind of a little zone of rock and roll where, like, you wanted to see people in the smallest room possible because that was, like, more credible. Sure. So I think I have, like, just this ingrained you know prejudice against you know arena shows because that's not like fucking where the real shit is man uh but i yeah but i i feel like i've kind of gotten over that night i would i would i would love to see billy joel at dodger stadium were that were that to be safe at some point i think i might have never been

to one of those kind of concerts myself i went to to see Aerosmith in middle school, but that was one of those outdoor amphitheater type deals, you know, like a 5,000 seater. Did you have to time travel to see those guys in middle school? Yeah, a 13-year-old Steven Tyler. On stage, you saw him say, maybe I should try a scarf, and the rest is history. I've definitely been to the Monster Truck Rally. I went to that one time. Yeah, me too.

I've been to two Rolling Stones arena shows, one in 1988 with Guns N' Roses opening for them. Whoa. Guns N' Roses and Living Color opening for them. Wow, that's a bill. That is the most 1988 bill of all time. And then

again around 1995 at the Rose Bowl. Is it fun to see a band that huge in a space that huge? It's not bad. Yeah, it's pretty fun. I gotta admit, it's not bad. Yeah. I bet there's not bad. Yeah, it's pretty fun. I got to admit, it's not bad.

Yeah. I bet there's an energy. I bet there's like a fucking energy where you're all going nuts. I feel like a big turning point that came in my life is I spent my teens and 20s going to rap concerts in clubs where you like, you know, you jump up and down the whole time and rap along and call and response, all those kinds of things. Right.

It's just sort of like the rap equivalent of the punk rock shows that you were going to Jordan, maybe less, less mosh pit violence, more threat of someone pulling a gun at some point. Where in San Francisco were you seeing these rap shows? What club in San Francisco? The Independent in San Francisco, Maritime Hall.

Oh, yeah. Those were all ages? This is mostly starting when I was 18. Okay. Not bottom of the hill? I went to was 18 okay not bottom of the hill i went to a few at the bottom of the hill absolutely i went to a few at the bottom of the hill club it's a good club i like that place bottom of the bottom of the hill is fun as shit um but uh then there was like a long period where i was really not going to anything and uh, like maybe a year ago, a year and a half ago, um, Teresa and I went to see

Van Morrison, uh, who at the time was just a regular asshole, not a COVID specific asshole. Right. Yeah. Jesus. Um, and, but like, I love Van Morrison, uh, you know, like Van Morrison is like the thing that my, that my father and stepmother always agreed on. My stepmother's from Belfast, where Van Morrison's from. It's very, very important to me. And I love Van Morrison's music. And so when I heard he was going to play, he was at the Wiltern Theater, which is, you know, like a 2,500 seat type deal. I was like, Teresa, is it okay if I just buy us Van Morrison tickets, even though they probably cost $400 or something? And she was like, yeah.

And Teresa and I went to that. And man, I love sit-in- concerts oh the best i realize now that like i was i was pursuing the like passionate intensity of you know seeing the the wake up show reunion concert at ruby sky in san francisco San Francisco where a tribe called Quest had a surprise reunion and everyone was pushing in each other and you're bathing and everyone's sweating and all that. But I can't do that anymore. And now I'm just like, yeah, I just want to watch an old guy sing jazz standards and I'm not obliged to leave my chair. It's so great when you go to a theater to see a show and there's all these

seats and the opening act plays and everyone's sitting down and then the main act comes out and then there's a fucking moment where everyone stands up and you're just like, God damn it! Really? We're gonna do this? I thought we were gonna sit down

for this one. Come on. Me and a friend of Jordan Jesse Go, Benjamin Harrison from The Greatest Generation and so forth, went to see Raphael Sadiq last year. And Raphael Sadiq, of course, is the main singer in Tony, Tony, Tony,

among many other achievements. And I love Raphael Sadiq more than anything. And I'm like, this is going to be great. This is a show for people my age and also 10 years older than me. It's going to be, you know, it's going to be like suited and booted. Everybody is going to be looking like a million dollars, like wearing church clothes. Every lady in this thing is going to be wearing heels.

And I am just going to sit down in a chair and enjoy as he sings Anniversary and a bunch of women scream. And we got to this club and there was no chairs. No. There was no chairs. I'm like, you can't have no chairs at a show for 45-year-olds. And then nobody was opening up the pit.

Fucking posers. I know. It's ladies and feather boas, weren't. These ladies in feather boas weren't. I remember going to see Courtney Barnett a couple years ago. Great show. Fucking rules. If you ever get a chance to see Courtney Barnett live, god damn it. That rocked so hard.

And I remember leaving. I turned to the friends I was with, and I said, well, that was a good length. Oh, no. I was happy and I said, well, that was a good length. Oh, no. I was happy that it wasn't too long. I'm like, well, sometimes they do. They fucking jam during the encore. They do a second encore. I was like, yeah, that's great.

We're out by 10. I am so ready for what I am thinking of as the Jimmy Pardo period in my life. Named after our mutual friend, Jimmy Pardo, which is where I go to tons of concerts. They're all sit downs in theaters that I bought the tickets for $15 on StubHub. And it's all elderly people. Like I'm only going to see, but I'm loving it. That I am so ready for. And I'm only going to see, but I'm loving it. That I am so ready for.

And I'm also ready, this is a difference between my style of partying out and theirs. I'm ready to be a jazz guy. Like you know how sometimes your parents will be like, I'd love to see some live jazz. I'm ready. I'm ready to just one day say to my wife, honey, why don't we go out to see some live jazz? Baked potato. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Baked potato in Burbank. I'm a mentor, man. You got to go. It's great. Yeah. I should set you up. I should do you an email CC with my stepdad, Brad. I'd love to hear what Brad thinks about those horns.

Do you, I mean, if you ever want to talk to somebody who has an opinion about live jazz venues, he's your guy. You know, I would love to be, I would love to get to the point of security within myself and enjoyment and appreciation of the arts, where I say to somebody,

you know what's a great place to see live music? New Orleans. Not there yet. Not quite, but I'm getting there. I'm close. I want to be that. I want that for myself and my family. New Orleans, live music. I love live music. Try the beignets. Love Zydeco. Oh, yeah. anything washboard yeah you yeah you love a

live concert where the washboard guy is at the front of the stage and everybody else is moved back so you could pay attention to the washboard yeah you don't want to miss the solo i did see that last time i was in new orleans a a live show where the washboard guy was fucking easily the star and everybody else was just there supporting him it was pretty amazing wow and i tried the beignets and you know what they were great yeah pretty good yeah oh our lives are gonna be great when there's public life again huh jesus please not soon enough you know how you see people writing on social media uh they're like man that the handshake is dead you know or like well no people are never gonna leave the house again

all i'm gonna do is shake hands with people yeah like i have an erection right now just thinking about shaking hands with a bunch of people right wow it's like all i want at all is to shake hands walk through a crowded marketplace of some kind i desperately uh i just want to hug just a big deep dry hug hell steve deep and dry i like them deep. I like them dry. Steve, right now, I'd take a wet hug. Oh, sure. I just got off a water slide. You know what even I'd take at this point? I'd take a fucking mafia death kiss.

Like, I would love, I would just love to be touched and to feel the warmth of a human so much, I would take the mafia death kiss. It would be worth it knowing that someday a guy is going to come for me and kill me with a hammer in my sleep. My only human contact has been with some goddamn medic shoving a fucking Q-tip up my nose that's the closest thing i've come to human contact in six months was it deep and dry though i know you like it i know you like it deep and dry it was deep and dry yeah yeah

oh well let's take a break so we can think about hugs. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse Go. It's Jordan, Jesse Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Steve Agee, COVID's golden boy. Wow. Look out, Tom Hanks. Sorry, Idris Elba.

Sorry, Idris. The Rock who? Do you have any context on that, Steve? No, I just, I like everybody else. I'm a victim of this i have not had covid but uh i'm staying in this house so i don't die from it yeah good call that's a good call you know i try i try to live um when something momentous happens to you, like you go on a little walk. Have you heard about this, Steve? Walking?

Yeah. I haven't done it much lately. Well, be careful because Dr. Fauci is going to come with his jackbooted thugs. Yeah. The government now requires you to go for a little fucking walk. Yeah, because apparently we live in communist Germany. Yeah. Jesus. Fucking Fauci making me go little fucking walk. Yeah, because apparently we live in communist Germany. Yeah. Jesus.

Fucking Fauci making me go on a walk. I don't have to if I don't want to. You know, Fauci called my house the other day. No way. And this is how Fauci talks. He says, hi, it's Dr. Fauci. I said, why are you calling me? Don't you have to fight this global pandemic?

He says, go for a little fucking walk around the neighborhood. I need you to go for a little fucking walk. It's me, Dr. Fauci. You have to. How'd he get your number? I gave it to him at a party, but that was pre-COVID. Oh, big mistake. Yeah.

And I was pretty hammered. He was looking good, though. You know. He does. He looks good, for his age especially. Yeah. mistake yeah and i was pretty hammered yeah he was looking good though you know he does he looks good for his age especially yeah i know i don't i know i don't like the man because he's uh you know forcing everybody to go on these dumb little fucking walks but uh i will have to admit he looks like he could be one of the thunder from down under oh. To call something back from earlier in the show. I think he was in the Thunder from Down Under in between the

Clinton and Obama administrations. Oh, okay. That lines up timeline wise. Yeah. He called me and said, what do you have? You have some little dogs? Why don't you go on a little fucking walk with your dogs? Bring some poop bags.

He says fucking walk, but he says poop bags not shit bags yeah he's a weird guy what a weirdo he's a weird guy i mean it's a kind of weirdo that passes a law that says you have to go on a little fucking walk you know yeah listen to a podcast and wave to your neighbor. That's what fun is now. Don't talk to them. It's hard. They could get too close. But really, you just want to give them a dry hug. A deep dry hug. A deep dry hug.

Anyway, Momentous Occasions is a segment on the show. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 206-984-4FUN, JJGO at MaximumFun.org. Here is an example of such a call. Hey, Jordan and Jesse, this happened like an hour ago, but I'm just getting cell signal again. So I'm hiking in the Adirondack Mountains, and I saw an American pine marten, which are super rare and super cute. They're like little weasels that kind of look like they're dressed up as squirrels,

and it was my first time ever seeing one, and I'm alone, and I didn't have anybody to tell me. I mean, you know what I mean, but I'm super excited, and that's it. Okay. Love the show.

Bye. Yeah. That's a fucking call right there. Good energy on that, too. Very the show. Bye. Yeah. That's a fucking call right there. Good energy on that, too. Very good energy. Oh, the vibes coming off that Pine Martin call. Where are the Adirondacks? I know that they're mountains, but I don't even know where to begin looking for them.

The Northeast, right? New York State, right? Sounds about right. Makes sense. i don't know you're the you're the mountain expert i'm more of a pine martin guy oh yeah i wonder if she was uh tempted to capture and tame it i think i would be it sounds pretty cute yeah i'd love to capture and tame that i'd probably if i was gonna hike theirondacks, I'd probably have one of those long-handled butterfly nets, just in case I saw a pine marten. Oh, man. Or, you know, a classic comic strip bank robber.

You can also catch one of those in a butterfly net. Yeah. God, I'd love to catch a bank robber just once. They always elude your grasp. So slippery. Mm-hmm. You know why? It's because they grease up.

That's true. It's just like the Thunder from Down Under. To reference something that we talked about earlier in the show. That'd be a fun... Hey, that'd be a fun movie. The Thunder from Down Under, their club closes, and they have to do a heist. And there are a bunch of hunks, and they grease up to go through air ducts and stuff. Hey, listeners, hit us up on social.

Does that sound like a good movie? If so, tag... You're out there, Jack Warner? Yeah. Mike Ovitz? Tag Mike Ovitz. Tell him I've got an idea. At Ovitz.

Hashtag grease him up. He'll know what it means. Ovitz. Mike Ovitz dead I don't know he was just a huge reference during David Letterman's NBC years

Mike Ovitz still alive 73 years old and living in the Adirondacks living in the Adirondacks catching weasels Steve you've been on the show a few times before, so I don't mean to be presumptuous in explaining to you what our show is, but our show is basically a podcast version of the Robert Altman film, The Player.

Oh, I like that. We sort of satirize inside show business stuff like eating at Spago. I used to live in an apartment. My first apartment in Los Angeles was right behind the old Spago up there next to the old Tower Records. Ah, the old Spago. Old Spago. Did you ever treat yourself?

Never went in once. I lived there for like two years. never went in once i lived there for like two years yeah i guess i knowing that like you know your first la apartment is usually just a real a real piece of shit and i imagine uh i don't mean to presume that your apartment was a real piece of shit steve but i mean typically it was a real piece of shit jordan oh well there you go i guess i should assume more even if it makes an ass out of you and me. And yeah, to live in the shadow of the thing that is used as a joke about opulence is probably a real weird fuck you to have to experience every day. Yep.

I went to Spago once and there was Wolfgang fucking Puck. No, is that true? Sure. Talking to celebrities at their table man and i'm like come over here wolfie wolfie no recognition nothing dick i think he probably i think he doesn't like being called wolfie i just wanted a long deep dry hug sure Sure. From the man who invented putting barbecue chicken on pizza. Yeah. Is that him? I think so.

I think that's right. It is now. Yeah. It is now. Good old Wolfie. Can I ask you guys a question? Now, Steve, you spent a lot of time Joshua Tree, the Salton Sea, points east of Los Angeles.

Yeah. You love the barren nightmarescape. I do. Of those places. I did, yes. Would you go on a hike, like a long hike? And also, would you go on a hike where it was just you? Oh, yeah.

I was doing like the first 70 days of this pandemic. I was hiking a lot until it got like really hot out there. What do you see when you're out there? Is it just desolate barrenness or will you see a goat every now and then? They got any martins? You'll see rabbits. You see rabbits. No martins.

Some roadrunners yeah i saw i was driving down the street right here in the city of los angeles i saw a bunny rabbit i said to myself that's living they're pretty amazing you know what i mean seeing a bunny rabbit right there oh you were i thought you were envying i thought you were envying the bunny's life no bunnies have terrible lives. They're scared of everything. Yeah. And their teeth never stop growing. Yeah, that's pretty bad.

Frequent fucking, from what I understand. Wow, yeah. Yeah, that's true. They do fuck it up. They do. They love it. A bunny rabbit knows how to lay some pipes. Adorable widow pipe i'm gonna get up in them adorable widow guts hello it's me the easter bunny i'm here to

weigh some pipes you're not the easter bunny you're dr fauci i can tell dr fauci in an easter bunny outfit that you're wearing to trick me. Nice try, Fauci. Yeah. Let's take another call. Hey, guys. I got a momentous occasion for you. I was driving to get groceries the other day. And, you know, this is a part of town that's mostly strip malls and industrial lots.

Can you pause this for a second, Brian? A place where a deer. How about those crickets? Yeah. Industrial lots. Can you pause this for a second, Ryan? A place where a deer. How about those crickets? Yeah.

From now on, we're only taking calls that feature in atmospheric soundscapes. Yeah. Please call us from the first part of the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. I would love to get a call from... I don't know if Disneyland's open yet. If it is, it's probably unsafe. But if you're fine being unsafe go and call us from the first part of the pirates of the caribbean ride we'll send you a

magnet or something i don't know we got magnets who gives us who gives a fuck we'll we'll find a magnet to send you i'll make one make a magnet send it to somebody who calls us from the ride i probably got one upstairs that says Hearst Castle. I'll cross it out and write in Jordan Jesse Go. There. Great. Great. Great. Should we have a castle?

Probably. What have we done to deserve a castle? It's a merit system. Okay. Sorry, Brian. Go ahead and press play. And, you know, this is a part of town that's mostly strip malls and industrial lots, a place where a deer has absolutely no place being. And yet right off the side of the road, there's a motherfucking deer standing there. And it kind of looks at me

and gives me this look like, yeah, I'm about to do it. And so it runs right out in the road. And so I like break for him. This dude behind me is honking his horn like get the fuck out of the way and so he like speeds up to go around me on the right doesn't see the deer almost hits it swerves a little bit everybody's fine we come up to the next stoplight and he kind of looks at me gives me the finger guns and drives off and what do i see dangling in the rear end of his car a couple of brass truck nuts truck testicles so i thought that was pretty momentous figure you guys might like to know thanks this guy took one of those moth classes yes because he knows that you need to tell the story you have to have a capper and then you have to have a moment of reflection

and the moment of reflection is the nuts the truck right right the capper is the finger guns and then the moment of the reflection is at the end of day, we're all just some brass truck nuts. Right. Dangling from this fucking crazy blue Chevy we're all going around on. It's what I call the earth. It's a crazy fucking blue Chevy, man. We're all just dangling off the back. Sorry, Dan Kennedy, we know your tricks now yeah we know

it's all about the truck nets a fun wildlife theme to the calls this week good job brian finding thematically linked uh momentous occasions it's a lot of fun it's like i always say you know nature finds a way right you do always say that it's true right before shit went crazy at jurassic park constantly saying that yeah you know what the other thing i always say is you're gonna need a bigger boat right oh you do say that a lot i do you know i got a lot of friends with two small boats what What can I say? And you also say, here comes a close encounter of the third kind. You know, that famous line from that movie. Have you seen the movie Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Jordan?

I have, yeah. It's great. Yeah, it's really cool. I had not seen it until like a year ago. I watched it. I'm like, yeah, this is exactly my kind of boring movie. That's great. Dreyfuss is really funny in it uh yeah i don't know i feel like i you you're i mean i forget often how funny richard dreyfus is when he's like flipping the fuck out he's great i didn't even so

richard dreyfus is like exactly in the heart of the category of people who were famous when I was a child and adolescent, but for the life of me, I couldn't figure out why. And it's because I hadn't seen Jaws or Close Encounters. And you see those and you're like, well, but obviously Richard dreyfus is america's greatest movie star this guy's amazing whereas my first experience with richard dreyfus was what the fuck is this krippendorf's tribe guy mr who the fuck is mr holland yeah why do i give a shit about that opus seems like a pretty shitty opus to me. But I don't know if that's because he's something that you understand better when you're an adult or simply because I hadn't seen those two movies. Yeah, I don't know.

I mean, I think I had seen those as a kid, and I think I liked Dreyfuss. He had like a horse racing movie that I watched that I like demanded my parents rent a lot he did? yeah what is that called? anyway Richard Dreyfus horse racing movie I don't fucking

Lamont's the movie anyway I'm sure that was like a like grown up 80s comedy but for some reason I just liked it. Let it ride. Let it ride! There you go. Wow. The dude's just funny when he freaks out.

I think because he starts with a lot of... Oh, and what about Bob? I liked What About Bob 2 as a kid, so I think I liked it. He's great in What About Bob. So good. He's so... Yeah, he's very funny.

A lot of freaking out in that. Yeah. I love it when he freaks out. HBO Max has a selected by AMC category on it. Yeah. I think it's TCM. Oh, TCM. Thank you.

That's unnecessary for me to correct you there. What you're saying is what you're, anyway. And I'm excited about this category. And I watched a movie that starred Dom DeLuise. And Dom DeLuise, I remember I could not have been more baffled by Dom DeLuise as a child. Like, what is this man? And it was obvious he was famous because he had parts for a famous person, like in the Muppet movie or whatever. Right.

But I couldn't figure out, I'm like, what is this guy's deal? Now, all I want to do is watch Dom DeLuise. That's definitely a kind of like celebrity when you're a kid, like someone you've never seen them in anything, but when you see them for the first time, people are treating them like a celebrity,

so you assume that they're famous. Yeah, Burt Reynolds was like that too. Like, oh, the M, people are treating them like a celebrity. So you assume that they're famous. Yeah. And yeah, it's usually like, Oh, the Muppets are excited to see this guy. I was always like, what is,

what's good about Burt Reynolds? And then it's because I didn't see, uh, it's because I didn't see smoking in the bandit until I was an adult. And I saw smoking in the band and I'm like, Oh, what's good about Burt Reynolds is everything in the world is the greatest thing in history just yeah wandering around chewing gum and it's the greatest shit ever

and slapping dom deluise yeah being a little mean to sally field okay let's take one more call hello jordan hello jesse hello go this is tony This is Tony from Vancouver, British Columbia, calling in with a momentous occasion. The project that I have been working on for the last year or so has finally been announced and has finally been revealed to the world. And I'm very excited to be able to start telling people that I adapted and drew the artwork together with Natalie Reese for the bubble graphic novel. This is fantastic. I mean, I have been a Jordan Jesse Go listener for a very long time. So guys, Jordan has been a real goddamn treat to be able to be a part of this.

Every page, every panel has been an absolute delight. So thank you so much for bringing me on to be a part of this. This announcement was made maybe a week or so ago at this point. So maybe you're wondering, oh, why, Tony, why are you being so tardy in calling in with this momentous occasion? And the answer is that I have been busy with another momentous occasion? And the answer is that I have been busy with another momentous occasion. My partner and I, I mean, mostly she, but you know, I was

there too, have been busy bringing a newborn child into the world. And in the time between then and now, he's been busy converting my waking hours into light and joy. So Jesse, I hope this will satisfy as an excuse for not calling in sooner. Love you guys. Love the podcast. I hope to talk to you soon. Cheers. Come on, Tony.

What is this, year one of the show? Your momentous occasion is you had your first child. Come on. We did that 10 years ago. It was mainly the comic book thing that's the primary one we don't we haven't had that before hi it's me dr fauci oh no i just brought a new new life into the world so why don't you go on a little walk around the block and you can look in the window of his store but you don't really want to go in because it makes you uncomfortable

hey wait a minute. Dr. Fauci, that's a mask. It's the Easter Bunny. Haha, with me the whole time. You didn't recognize me by my distinctive Easter Bunny voice. I didn't. It's a very slight difference. Well, I'm off to lay some eggs.

What about some pipe? Fuzzy whittle pipe it's up for pre-order now uh by the way the uh the bubble graphic novel that's the the great tony cliff uh the creator of the delilah dirk series, which is a pretty fantastic series of graphic novels for graphic novel fans and also maybe older kids. Yeah, and he was nice enough to, yeah, be the art guy for the bubble graphic novel. I wrote the script with Sarah Morgan. We talked a little bit about this last week.

Natalie Reese did the colors. And yeah, boy, he was a swell guy. And I think, you know, yeah, just such a, I mean, in addition to being a really brilliant artist, you know, has listened to this show for a long time. So I think he kind of like, you know, understands things that we think are funny. So yeah, it was great. I feel like I did not have to have any, like, sense of humor discussions with him at all

while we were doing this. It was like he just got everything. Were you surprised, Jordan, that so many of the crowd scenes had Booster Gold in them? I mean, I was delighted at first, but then concerned we were going to run up against copyright issues right steve you got an in with warner brothers as king shark please tell them

not to sue us all right i'll i'll talk to him he's asked hater to say something steve what are the top three acting choices that you have to make when you're playing a... I presume King Shark is some kind of shark man with a crown? No crown. It's just implied that he's royalty, I guess. Got it. By the name. Implied by the name. The choices? Yeah. What kind of choices

are you making? Eyes open or eyes closed. Right. Run or walk. Yeah. Deep voice or Fauci voice. Right. Easter Bunny or Dr. Fauci. Yeah, it's me.

King Shark. David Hader. I'll get you, Superboy. Yeah. Hey, you can pre-order The Bubble graphic novel. A lot of people have been, not a lot of people, some people on social media have been telling me that their local indie bookstores are pre-ordering it. I actually made a note of the ones I've heard about.

If you're in Northern Virginia, you can give the people at One More Page Books a call, Washington, D.C., Politics and Prose, and Salt Lake City, the King's English Bookshop. Yeah, so definitely, if you can, get it from your local indie bookstore. But if you like shopping on Amazon, it's up there now, and you can preorder it.

Politics and pros, that's a dope bookstore. I've been to that bookstore before. Yeah, that's why they're preordering Bubble now. Preorder that bad boy. Preorder the bad boy. Listen, I know if you're out there, probably your first priority was PS5 preorder. Yeah. Second priority, Cybertruck. Cybertruck from Elon Musk. priority was ps5 pre-order yeah second or second priority cyber truck cyber truck from elon musk

if you have a little bit left over please listen you're you're you're you're cash doesn't mean a lot to musk or sony but pre-ordering a book is a really big deal for the book so if you can please do it it's really really good really good. I've seen it. Tony's a fucking genius. And the baby will be a genius as well. You know what? People have cellular telephones. Yeah.

Why not call your local bookstore while you're out on your little fucking walk? Yeah, that's a great thing to do on your little fucking bullshit walk. Yeah. Get on your Yelp to type in indie bookstore call them up and then that's another good thing about doing that is that if enough people call they hear like they say to themselves hey i've heard this fucking bubble thing seems like it's gonna be huge i'm gonna order a couple extra copies and then they do and then more people can buy it so that's helpful anyway do it while

you're on your dumb little walk you fucking baby my dad makes art are you specifically being tony's baby now yeah i'm tony's baby yeah congratulations tony it's yeah Children are wonderful. If you ask me, they're our future. Mm-hmm. And the past, if we ask time traveler Booster Gold. A jerk from the future. JJGo at MaximumFun.org or 206-984-4Fun. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jesse Go. Hey, you like movies without coming up with movie ideas over the course of an hour. Cause that's

what we do every week on story break a writer's room podcast, where three Hollywood professionals have an hour to come up with a pitch for a movie or TV show based off of totally zany prompts. Like that time. We re-imagined star Wars based on our phone's autocomplete. Luke Skywalker is a family man and it's Star Wars, but it's a good idea. How about that time we broke the story of a bunch of Disney Channel original movies based solely on the title and the poster? Okay, Sarah Hyland is a 50-foot woman. Let's just go with it, guys. Or the time we finally cracked the Adobe Photoshop feature film.

Stamp tool is your Woody and then the autofill is the new Buzz Lightyear. Join us as we have a good time imagining all the movies Hollywood is too cowardly to make. Story Break comes out every Thursday on Maximum Fun. I don't know why I'm using this voice now. Hey, if you like your podcast to be focused and well-researched, and your podcast host to be uncharismatic, unhorny strangers who have no interest in horses, then this is not the podcast for you. Yeah, and what's your deal? I'm Emily. I'm Lisa. Our show's called Baby Geniuses. And its hosts are horny adult idiots. We discover weird Wikipedia pages every episode. We discuss institutional misogyny. We ask each

other the dumbest questions and our listeners won't stop sending us pictures of their butts. We haven't asked them to stop, and our listeners won't stop sending us pictures of their butts. We haven't asked them to stop, but they also aren't stopping. Join us on Baby Geniuses every other week on MaximumFun.org. Jordan, Jesse Goh, I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Moore's boy detective. Steve Agee, deep dry hugger that's a burt reynolds movie wasn't it deep dry hugger yes you know have you guys seen the movie the longest yard i have not uh-uh which one uh the i'm speaking of the original one um

not the adam sandler remake correct yeah the original one is the premise is burt reynolds is in jail and he organizes a football team in the jail and there's a great part where bernadette peters is really funny there's a few racist parts of course 70s and homophobic parts of course 70s but mostly it's there's no jokes it's just burt reynolds wandering around chewing gum yep and that is pretty great i've been meaning to see gator oh i've never seen gator and i think he fights a gator in it oh that sounds good there's no way he fights a gator in it i think he probably it's called gator and i think he fights a gator in it oh that sounds good there's no way he fights a gator in it i think he probably it's called gator steve no he guards a fence dude man that'd be a real disappointment you buy a ticket to a movie called gator

this is a guy making sure somebody doesn't jump a fence? You're going to pop your tires if you drive in this way. It's wrong. This is exit only. All right. I googled Gator. Yeah. I got a lot of pictures of a UTV crossover vehicle.

Looks like something maybe like a groundskeeper uses. But also the poster for a Burt Reynolds movie, the tagline of which is, meet the bayou's baddest good old boy and he's hugging it he's hugging a bikini babe sweet jordan weren't you a gator at the lake in in mission va yeah i was there was a there's a there's a man-made members only lake near where i grew up and i uh for a summer operated the gate where people um went in and out.

Anyway, anyway, fucking good story, huh? What can you do in that lake? They got little boats? Yeah, there's little boats. There's paddle boats. You can take a junior lifeguard class, which I did. That's a lot of fun. Yeah, there's concerts. You can see like, you know, it's where you'll see like um like a temptations but there's

none of the original temptations sure they do uh they so they do those kinds of comfort oh i opened the door for uh joan osborne once when she was coming in to do her concert oh now we're talking that was great joan osborne fucking osborne ozzie's sister. Right? So why she also bites the head off a bat during every performance. Right after What If God Was One Of Us. Fucking snacks on a bat. Fucking snacks.

I watched, a couple months ago, I watched my VHS copy of the documentary Standing in the Shadows of Motown about the Funk Brothers, the Motown house band, or one of the Motown house bands. And it was, it's an important, they're incredibly important and charming dudes. And there was a lot of musical performances in it. And, you know, maybe the movie was a little bit of baby boomer baby boomer corny but the one thing

that i took home from it is joan osborne is in it a lot and honestly she's fucking great she sings great she seems super cool i was like i guess jo Joan Osborne just totally delivers on the promise of her hit song, What If God Was One of Us. Yeah. She was on week... I heard her on weekend edition today. She's got new music. Good for her.

What? Really? Yeah. She can really blow. I mean, she was really... You know, not all these people really carried off their Motown covers in this movie, and she really did. Good for her.

Joan Osborne. There you have it. It's all the bats. It's like, you know how they say voiceover actors have to eat a green apple? Well, you're going to sing some Motown covers. You got to snack on a bat. Got to do it. Just talking about some stuff from earlier in the show.

Steve, have you got anything of note going on that our audience should know about? Steve, have you got anything of note going on that our audience should know about? Well, I did just shoot an episode of Superstore this past week. So that's happening. Hey, cool. They're back in production and being very safe. So I'm not going to lie. It was a massive anxiety attack the first couple hours being on a set.

I believe it. But they're running it really well. And so I think that starts mid-October. So keep an eye out. It's awesome. Very funny show. Very funny television program. And I'm not on the gram myself,

but I've heard many people compliment your Instagram photography. As soon as I get on that gram. You gotta get on the gram. I just got off the Facebook. Oh, nice. So you went. I watched that social dilemma and deleted my Facebook. Oh, I haven't watched that, but I hear that it'll make you do it.

Oof, yes. Yeah. I've actually got a little plan to get on the gram, actually. I've got a little. Let's just say I might get on the gram here pretty soon. Nice. Jordan, I'll tell you. Let's just say I might get on the gram here pretty soon. Nice. Jordan, I'll say this. I'm on the gram.

And I'm going to tell you, Steve Agee, number one recommended follow. Okay. No, that can't be true. Number one. Number one overall. And I... Number two, put this on. Thank you. Thank you.

Number three, I hear there's an account where it's just videos of cats doing that thing where they go Probably. I want to follow that thing. Number two is a dog named Willie. At City Willie.

This dog. Somebody, some listener, you know, Judge Sean Hodgman listener or something, said, you should follow my dog on Instagram. And I'm like, come on. At least tell me about someone else's dog that's good. Right. You're just plugging your own dog to me? And I looked at the dog, and it's the greatest dog in the history of the world.

City Willie. Fully delivers. City Willie. But the dog is just cute. It's not a gifted artist like our friend Steve Agee. Steve Agee is a legitimately wonderful photographer who posts beautiful photographs all the time. Oh, thank you.

And really a more interesting and aesthetically appreciatable than some professional photographers, full-time professional photographers. Steve is an occasional professional photographer. Trying to get there. Who I follow on Instagram. Steve is a really gifted photographer and has a really beautiful eye and also an interesting lifestyle that allows him to photograph interesting stuff.

Well, thanks, man. It's very kind of you. I mean it. Jordan had just heard that. I've lived it. I've heard it. Could be bullshit. Well, you'll have to get on the gram and see.

I'm getting on the... I just say I like it on the... I can't say my dad to say I'm not sorry about Biggie. I just say I'm not getting on the gram. All right. Wait, Jordan, are you still here? All I can hear is the Easter Bunny. Yeah, that's right! Our producer is Brian Sonny D. Fernandez. Time to get my ass eaten! They love sex.

They're a very sexual creature. You can follow us on Twitter at Jordan underscore Morris and at Jesse Thorne. You can like us on Facebook or join the MaxFun Facebook group. We're also on Reddit at MaximumFun.reddit.com or at BozScaggs.reddit.com. I think that's about it. Our theme music, Love You by The Free Design. Thanks to The Free Design and to their label, which is Light in the Attic Records. Brilliant band.

Totally amazing. You can find that on Kites Are Fun, the best of the free design, which is a beautiful record that I highly recommend. And our guest has been the one and only Mr. Stephen Agee from Television's Superstore, and of course, the Diablo Cody Talk Show. Amen, brother. We will talk to you next time on Jordan, Jessica. brother. We will talk to you next time on Jordan, Jessica.