Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 685: The Paninissance with Dave Shumka and Graham Clark

Episode Date: May 6, 2021

Dave Shumka and Graham Clark (Stop Podcasting Yourself podcast) join Jordan and Jesse for the first week of MaxFunDrive 2021!!  They get into all the old Los Angeles restaurants that advertise pastrami, but actually have a different specialty that everyone orders, the time Dave's family rented a video camera to tape him singing the Gilligan's Island theme song, and the sad sitcom intros that made you realize you were up too late when you were a kid. Plus, we get a call from one of Jordan's favorite guys!  It's the first week of MAXFUNDRIVE! You can support the show by going to MaximumFun.org/join! 

Give a little time for the child within you. Don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you. It's Jordan, Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Pasadena King. Always good to have you on the program, Jordan. Thank you. Always good to have you. So do you think, let me just take the temperature here rectally.

Do you think I should talk more or less about Pasadena on the show? Well, I mean, here's the thing. Before you move to Pasadena, and we should explain to the listener who hasn't been listening the last 17 episodes that you moved to Pasadena. Yeah. Before you moved to Pasadena, a lot of times we talked about things in Los Angeles, America's second largest city. We would talk about the Grove. We would talk about specific restaurants and streets, so on and so forth. And I think a lot of people complained that was too

provincial, that we were talking about the second largest city in America. Coastal too. There was a coastal elitism to it that I think rubbed a lot of people the wrong way. And I think that is one of the reasons why it's so great that we're talking about you living in Pasadena, for one thing. It's more of a sort of universal experience. I think everyone has a little Pasadena in them. Even if you don't live in Pasadena, you've lived in a Pasadena. Am I right? Right.

Even if you haven't eaten at Pie and Burger, you've eaten at a Pie and Burger. A Pie and Burger, sure. And I think as you so aptly, so insightfully pointed out, Jordan, you've moved inland. You've moved to the northeast now of los angeles so you're getting you're giving listeners a real taste of america's heartland um no longer is it a bunch of surfer dudes you know what i mean sure well i've moved away from you know those posh hollywood celebrities i used to live by i'm speaking of course of course, about Nick Adams. Yes. Our friend Nick. And I've moved to where the people are.

By the people, I mean Kevin Porter. As blue collar and working class as a podcaster can get. So yeah. So I do have a couple of Pasadena things to say up top. Jordan, hold on. This is a tease. It's a little tease we just want to say up top. Jordan, hold on. This is a tease, a little tease. We just want to mention it's the Max Fund Drive. It is. Things have been really tough in Pasadena lately. The economy's really taken a hit. And if you want to put a little bit of money into

Pasadena, go to MaximumFund.org slash join. What Pasadena is, it is a community theater and antique store economy. Yeah, exactly. Your $5 a month goes directly through Jordan to play it against sports. Right. Used sporting goods is such a central. I mean, basically, Biden ran on supporting the used sporting goods industry of too many people paying full price for tennis rackets that they're really realistically they're going to use them once or twice a year. Go ahead, Jordan. Yeah. So here are here's just let's say, you know, I think I got three. Here's three fun Pasadena things that I've discovered in the past, in the past couple days, at least since we last recorded. Another update from the Pasadena subreddit, the most adorable and wholesome subreddit

on the internet. This is from rpasadena. This was at the top. This is a question. Best chocolate chip slash chocolate chunk cookies in Pasadena? Any recommendations? With or without nuts? You know what, Jordan?

With or without nuts. Inclusivity matters. Yes. Inclusivity matters. Chip, chunk, with nut, without. It's a big tent. Everybody's welcome. Get under here.

Yeah. But seriously, though, leave the nuts out. Nobody wants that. And I would say there was probably 60 comments under here. Yeah. But seriously, though, leave the nuts out. Nobody wants that. And I would say there was probably 60 comments under that. Yeah. Very lively discussion. So, two, I had my car washed at Pasadena Car Wash. They went with the first thought name-wise.

Right. But I was at the Pasadena Car Wash. They're not going A to C, as they say in Ambrose. No, no, no. Yeah. So I got it washed. They did a great job. And whose headshot should I see hanging up by the cash register?

But frequent Jordan Jesse Go reference, weatherman Dallas Rains. He had a great car wash. What do we got to do to get our headshots up in local businesses? Should we get headshots? Yeah, I think that's step one. Get headshots. Carry them around. Well, I mean, I was going to say pre-sign them, but then I think people want a personalized message.

It's about the show. Yeah. You know, you're really, you want to involve people in the experience. Yes. And so that was really fun. And thing three, it was a couple weeks ago. It was, I don't know if you guys have heard of this holiday. I don't know how much you guys like to blaze, but it was 420. And I realized... Jordan, you know you're speaking to the king of drugs right now. I thought so. I was wondering if you were still the king of drugs. And it turns out, I don't know if maybe you had been disposed. Maybe you had been poisoned. Maybe you had been poisoned by the prince of drugs and wanted your throne.

My uncle. Yeah. Blew that dust on me. Now there's a power vacuum in the drug kingdom. So I went to the closest, I had not been to a dispensary out here. I had one that I liked by my old place, the Green Easy. If you're ever over there visiting Nick Adams, head on into the Green Easy. Let's be honest, you're meeting Nick Adams at the Green Easy. Sure.

Give each other a little high five on the way out. Jesse, do you think, I think you could, and maybe even we can get our guests in on this. Do you think you could guess the name of Pasadena's hottest weed dispensary? Okay. So a lot of weed dispensaries have either pun names, medical themed names like care or medicine or whatever. A lot of them have names with an urban flavor, like Mad Heads Dispensary or something like that. Talk it out. Talk it out. You're going to get there. So these are some of the ideas that come immediately to mind. Now, this one is in Pasadena, so I'm going to guess that it's called the Pasadena Marijuana

Dispensary. Dallas Rains, head shot up in the lobby. No, do we want to welcome our guests and give them a chance to guess? I think someone can get this. I think it is obvious in a great way, and I think someone can get this. Okay. It is obvious in a great way, and I think someone can get this. Okay.

Our guests on the program, not only two of our favorite podcasters, two of our favorite men walking this great green earth, this blue-green marble as seen from space. Right. You know, Jordan, they say the astronauts can see two man-made things from space, the Great Wall of China and the greatest Canadian podcast of them all. Stop podcasting yourself. Our guests on the program, Graham Clark and Dave Shumka. Hi, Dave and Graham. How are you doing, buddies? Hello. Hello.

It's true. Astronauts can see two things from space. Yeah. These nights. Yeah. See, Shumka gets it, Jordan. That's why we invite him on the program. Graham, we'll find out.

But Dave gets it. We also would have accepted your mom. Yeah. Do you guys want to take a whack at what Pasadena's hottest weed dispensary is called? I have a guess. You have a guess, Graham? Yeah. Okay, you do it.

Dr. Spliff Medicine Woman. Wow. No, but it should be. Yeah, it's really good. I think somewhere in Los Angeles, Brian Fernandez just broke his microphone laughing at that.

Yeah, they are leaving money on the table by not calling it that. Because I think, you know, a Dr. Quinn medicine woman pun has, I think it's the right time for it. The show is back in the zeitgeist. Millennials are binging it. They'll binge anything. They'll binge anything. Those wacky millennials are binging it. They'll binge anything. They'll binge anything. Those wacky millennials. You name it, they'll binge it.

It's a way better name than the one that I fucking came up with for my spot, which is Touched by a Marijuana Angel. Sure. Highway to Hashish. Yes. Yes. Jordan, seriously. highway to hashish yes yes um uh jordan seriously is it a rose bowl themed pun oh it's not but that's a great direction somebody else could probably use that okay yeah smoke a rose bowl you know fat rose bowls it's it's it's it's there. All I know about Pasadena is the stuff that you've talked about off the top of the show.

I know there's a little old lady. There's a little old lady. She's from here. There's nobody, Mina. No, I'm... I fold. I think the Rose Bowl thing was great. you're on

the right track uh pasadena's hottest weed dispensary is in fact called puff puff pasadena and i i was expecting something um you know more in line with pasadena's antique store aesthetic i was expecting a you a crafty boutique weed experience. This was a terrifying place. All the doors looked like they had been kicked in recently. There were

lost cat posters up in the building for cats that had gone missing years ago. It seemed like they were squatting in this place. But that's an antique. Technically, that's an antique. No, I guess you're right. I guess you're right for collectors.

And it was a very dirty place as well, but they had taken great care to paint a beautiful mural of Goku doing a bong rip. That was very well maintained. that that was very well maintained the rest of the store uh uh seemed like maybe uh it was not zoned to be there there is in a marijuana dispensary there is a very difficult balance to maintain at the door uh which is you want someone who kind of sets the tone. You want someone there at the door who sets the tone for, you know, a high-touch, high-class customer experience.

You know, you want somebody who's welcoming you with the welcome that you get when you sit down in first class on an international air flight. You know what I mean? You want somebody to offer you a little flute of champagne and some hot nuts. That's ideal. Dave, I'm referring to these nuts. Oh, yeah, yeah, yes, of course. But then you also need someone scary enough to prevent people from just bum rushing the door of an all cash business.

Sure. Yes, it was. It was delicate. They had the latter, but not the former. Yeah. Now, Jordan, do you expect anyone outside of Los Angeles to know the difference between Pasadena and the rest of it? Angeles didn't know the difference between Pasadena and the rest of it. You know, we

on this show, Dave, stopped caring about reaching out to a broader audience a while ago. Is that philosophy a mistake? Yes. Almost certainly. Because, I mean, obviously we could have people tuning in, you know,

because they're fans of yours, and then they're just kind of hearing about these kind of regional curiosities local weathermen these sorts of things uh yeah and then they never listen again dave you and graham are running what they call a big tent podcast you're talking about universal things like commercial drive and Canadian tire. Yes. Yeah, Davy Street. Yeah, Canadian tire, absolutely. Yes. Tim Hortons. What's our favorite? JJ Bean.

The answer, of course, D's Nuts. D's Nuts. What award shows have the Barenaked Ladies hosted recently? What's Snow up to? Yeah. Hey, Dave, today I ate at white spot oh really yeah yeah yeah another universal reference yeah what's what's white spot it's a vancouver uh like it was it started off as like a burger you know the best burger and fries in town and now it's just like a chain restaurant with you know fettuccine and tacos and they're like but like you used to be able to go and my parents still do you you can go to one where they i guess they don't roller skate to your car anymore but they

like put a giant tray that goes across the driver's seat and the passenger seat, attaches onto the windows, and they put the food in. Wait, it goes across the entire front cabin of the car? It goes on to both sides of the car. Does it telescope? Yeah, I think so. I haven't been

to that part, like that version of it in 30 years. You've been to other ones recently and not the one where they put a tray across the entire front of your car, Dave. Yeah. Cause it's like a, uh,

I guess when you do that, it's like an evening out. Like you're committed. You're no limousine liberal. Yeah, no, it's, it's,

uh, have you ever been to that one, Graham? No, I don't have a car. So it it would be me balancing a tray in the parking lot trying to like bend the tray so the food slides into your mouth like a little slide i'd like to see graham roll up to that spot uh that that particular white spot and have them run that tray across the whole front of the of the city bus. Yes.

Now we're talking. Now we're talking. Everybody on the bus can have a bite. And it's a day made. Yeah. But Dave, on the subject of restaurants that expand their menus to include all foods, the The like native restaurant genre to Los Angeles is a restaurant that serves tacos, burgers, and pastrami. Somehow in like 1942, pastrami became endemic to all fast food restaurants in Los Angeles. And now so many restaurants have a giant sign outside that says pastrami.

And I do, I truly do not know who's going to these places for pastrami. So I think here's the secret with those places, Jesse. So they, yes, there are many, many restaurants that have been there since, you know, uh, uh, early 1900s tacos, burgers, and pastrami at every one of those restaurants, one of them is good, but you do not know which one it is. Each of those restaurants can nail one of those things, but it is always unclear which. So it's a roulette.

It's like a Russian roulette, but with diarrhea. Near our office is a restaurant that I first went to when I first moved to Los Angeles. And I was living in Koreatown. And there's a neighborhood called Pico Union below Koreatown. And our old friend, big time Gene O'Neill, suggested to me when I moved to LA that I go to this restaurant. It's a restaurant that specializes in a takeout container with a bed of French fries and a quarter chicken on top of it or half a chicken on top of it. And it's all soaked in this. Oh, is this Dino's? Yeah.

I think you're giving Gene credit for my rec. Oh, really? I've been stumping for Dino's since before you got here, Jesse. Well, then Jordan told me, and I believe you absolutely, Jordan, and God bless you for that recommendation. Give me credit for recommending a restaurant. Damn it. I'm good at that too.

I can say a restaurant that's good. The chicken is soaked in this kind of orange, like literally orange vinegar garlic sauce. The fries are soaked in that same sauce. It's fantastic. It's more food than two people can eat and it costs $8. And it is,

I have never seen someone order something other than this dish. This chicken dish is, you just go up to the counter and you say two. Right. And they give you two of them uh and this restaurant is called dino's burgers and it has a giant sign outside that says pastrami yeah the great pastrami run of 1926 everybody knows this story i think in the 20s it was code for opium. Like you could score opium and then just kind of crash in the back. Is there a food product that's endemic or a style of restaurant that's native to Vancouver, British Columbia, where you guys live?

There's a lot of sushi places here and debate over which one's the best in town but i can't eat fish so i can't contribute to that conversation but i'm sure dave has a favorite yeah i have my favorites the closest one um yeah no it's it's sushi and coffee uh not not in the same places but that wouldn't be bad though sushi coffee house i don't even like hearing those two words close together. Hearing the word sushi and then the word coffee is so gross. Do you remember in like... I remember when I was a kid and it was sort of around the, you know,

late 80s espresso boom that... The time of the sun-dried tomato. Yes, exactly. Yes, yes. And I remember there being... The panini sauce. Back when all sandwiches were pressed flat. And I remember their chocolate-covered coffee beans

became a thing as like a candy treat. And I remember having a couple as a kid, and it was like, it felt kind of like that thing where, you know, if your parents catch you smoking, they make you smoke the entire pack. It's like, oh, you're interested in coffee. Hey, well, have some of this. It was just vile. Like you're chewing on a coffee bean.

Yeah. I mean, one of the things about coffee is that it truly tastes very bad. Now, we, I think human beings can train themselves to appreciate many flavors, but coffee's primary thing is being bitter, which is a warning to our bodies that we're consuming poison. Yeah, well, what's something that's really bitter? I was going to say kale, but it's not bitter. What's a food that's bitter? Coffee.

Yes, coffee. That's what I was looking for. Thank you. We're talking about regional differences, and I wanted to bring back an old line of questioning that I was thinking about this week, and I was thinking about this week and i was thinking about it fondly we had a very fun run of asking our guests um where when they were growing up where did a teen go to be bad where did a teen go to be bad with other teens and we retired the segment when i believe it was our guest david hater who lived in Japan, went to a Yakuza bar where he karate kicked a door off of its hinges, I believe.

So we retired the segment, but I think it's time to bring it out of retirement Rambo style. Also, we should explain, we retired it because after David told that story, we realized that no one could ever compete with Blair Erskine, who just went to a Christian dance club that was called CC Coconuts. What was it called? JC Pineapples, I believe. JC is for Jesus Christ.

The pineapples is for pineapples. Yeah, so we've had a lot. I mean, we've had a lot of great answers to this question. I don't want to, you know, obviously, you know, put expectations sky high. But I am curious about where your teen mischief places were growing up. Graham, were you bad? Yeah, I was bad to the bone. Because I find this hard to relate to because I was never bad. That's right.

Yeah. Dave just went to church and then went home. There wasn't anywhere in between church and home where you could stop and bum a smoke. Yeah, exactly. I think the place for me was a place called Lloyd's Rollercade, which was a roller skating rink

in an industrial part of town. And it was a place that if you're inside Lloyd's Rollercade, innocent fun're inside Lloyd's Rollercade, innocent fun. Outside Lloyd's Rollercade, drugs and complete chaos. So that was like by the dumpster of Lloyd's Rollercade. That was my hot spot. Yeah, well, I mean, once they throw away all the drugs,

you're there by the dumpster. It's drug freeganism yeah exactly drugs and corn dogs it's all that the teenager needs i would love it i would love it if this rollercade you mentioned it was in an industrial neighborhood yeah i would love it if it was in a residential neighborhood wouldn't you love to be in the backyard looking through the window of a roller cane? Yeah. Just waking up to shares of, do you believe in life after love on repeat?

Or possibly in a commercial neighborhood, like in a high rise or next to a stock exchange. Or like just one floor of a high rise. You know, up the elevator to get the boys roller cane. I went to a movie theater for a while that was in a high rise uh and it was when i lived in koreatown there were no movie theaters within 15 or 20 minutes drive like you really had to go to another a whole other part of los angeles to go to the movies uh but then this movie theater opened up and my wife and I went there to see

Tomorrow Never Dies or whatever. And we went into a Korean home goods mall, which is these stores that sell plastic baskets and bidets and rice cookers. And there's six home goods that are essential to a Korean home, not otherwise available in the United States. They sell them at a Korean specific home goods store. And we went into one of these, there were a lot of these in the neighborhood, went into one of these, got into an elevator because it said to get into an elevator, just went up into an office building

and there was a Korean language movie theater there that was just on a floor of an office building and they just projected off of a DVD. And honestly, honestly, it was like one of the best movie theaters I've ever gone. Like that is my ideal movie theater experience. As long as they're not charging me more than $12, I would love to go into an office building

and watch it with Korean subtitles so that I don't have to like fight for a seat. Nice, yeah. Dave, were you really not, when did you become bad? Like when did you drink first or when did you like try drugs first? I drank first when it was

legal to do it. I waited until I was 19 and I was two years into college and living in the dorms and everyone was drinking and I was like, well, this is not legal. Did you do that

little shoulder shimmy while you said it? I'm not going to tell anybody, but you could get in real trouble for this. You should know you could get in real trouble. And you told the dean, like, something's going on in there. I don't want to be a squealer, but something's going on in there that you should check out. Yeah, you should smell their breath. It smells like dad's breath. out yeah you should smell their breath it smells like dad's breath it definitely was a turnoff uh like to drinking like being sober around drunk people especially in college especially like the

next day when you know there was just like the the common room was just filled with stinky half-drunk beers. And it was like spilled into the carpet and stuff. Man, that college carpet smell. Speaking of which. Whoa. Graham's cracking a Bruce. Go, go, go. I remember in college, I also didn't drink in college.

I still don't drink. And I remember in college, a common friend of Jordan and mine moved into a shared apartment. And she was living focused, successful, highly, you know, kind of type A lady. Runs a giant restaurant in Austin, Texas now. And I remember going over to her apartment and I remember so vividly the smell. Just like the foul, like beer on on the floor spilled bong water smell and i was just so confused because she was such a like together clean with it person and i remember saying to jordan like what's going on at lauren's house like it doesn't seem ink and jordan was just like have you never been to a college person's apartment

and i was like oh i suppose i am friendless now that you mention it yeah it is pretty uniform and i think my my theory is that you know all all around the world if you were to go to their college town and you know find some way to snoop around at their living rooms, you would get a very similar kind of stale waft. In fact, Dave, that's my recommendation to you. Go to a college town, find some way to snoop around a few living rooms and see if you can get a waft. Yeah, yeah. Dave, was your not drinking, was it not you're not drinking was it like was it a like a religious not drinking or no no it was just like a uh i've always been a rule follower and like

a control freak like i'm scared of uh substances that might make me you know lose control of a my bowels that's a concern. He was into men for a while. We were really worried about him. I still am. I love it. I love this stuff. Dude, you still softening over there? Nice. These are strong, so just take half

before you're really going to ass blast. Take half. See what it does. See how soft it makes your stool. But my teenage years, the two things I remember, one is going to pool halls

and assuming this is what grown-ups did. By grown-ups you mean Jackie Gleason? Yeah, W.C. Fields, my uncle, he would be there. Right. Paul Newman.

Paul Newman. And the other- All the adults. All three adults. And the other was going to Blockbuster and seeing that they don't have the video or video game I want, and then cruising by where they're assembling things that they're going to reshelve and be like, I wonder if MLB Sports Talk Baseball is in here. Did someone just return it?

Yeah, exactly. They couldn't have kept it for the full three days. Graham, what were you doing by the dumpster by the roller rink? It was mostly drinking beers there was always i don't know if it's called the same thing in america but you'd get somebody to boot for you it was you getting like a very either creepy or crime adjacent adult to buy you yeah like a paul newman yes a real jackie gleason so thereleason. So there would be one kid that had a bunch of beer, and we didn't know what beers were easy to drink. And so I remember one guy brought a whole thing of Porter, and we were like, oh, man, this is bitter shit.

But we still downed it all that is the like learning curve of the like kid who you know starts drinking a little late um who like doesn't have an older sibling is the like uh do i just drink vodka from the bottle i don't know you know yeah just like just knowing that it's time to drink but not knowing what the fuck you should do i remember like one of the first times I went to a bar, I knew the bartender, and I was like, oh, what should I have? I was thinking a grasshopper. Yeah. So the first couple times I went to bars where people were ordering cocktails, I said a Manhattan

because I had heard about it on The Simpsons. Right. There's a Simpsons episode where Bart goes to work for the mafia and makes them Manhattans. Yeah. So I ordered that, and I've never liked them. I'm going to say, I mean, I say this as a non-drinker, but with an outsider's eye for detail,

and, of course, my canny social awareness, I'm going to say that 20 to 30 percent of social drinkers at bars are drinking their signature drink, which is basically the first drink they figured out how to order at a bar. Yeah. Like somebody just said whiskey and soda when they were 20 years old and they had scammed their way into a bar. And they were like, I mean, this is fine. Yeah. And they didn't want to think of new things. The first time I went to a bar, I was with three of my friends and they had a whiskey drink, a lager drink, a vodka drink. I had a cider drink.

Dave, this is our show, not your show. I don't know, I kind of like their show better at this point. We're changing the show, Jesse! Guys, Dave, Graham, what is a goblin? Oh boy, I mean will we ever get to the bottom of that?

Yeah, we know that it's slimy we know that it's short it has like uh the ragged clothes jordan i don't know if you ever heard this segment on stop podcasting yourself but more of a retail nightmares guy oh sure yeah that's our main competitor but for quite some time on stop podcasting Yourself, every guest who came on was asked what a goblin is. And the breadth of variety of answers on that subject was just breathtaking. I mean, it's nebulous. I mean, it's very nebulous. You know, you hear about ghosts and goblins and everyone can tell you about a ghost.

But a goblin is kind of like, you know, it's up in the air, baby. Yeah, I think he's probably got long fingers. Could have long fingers. Have you ever, like, consulted, like, a mythology expert about it? We consulted Steve Harvey because they did it once. They did a family feud. We asked 100 people, what is something about a goblin? And then someone said, that big old ass, and Steve Harvey just looked at the camera like, I don't.

Who are these people? Who are these people? I've been watching a lot of Family Feud lately. It is. I just love it. I think Steve Harvey is the greatest man to host anything. I think that fucking looking at the camera stick gets me every time. He's great.

I mean, he has a really funny face. His face is basically a drawing of a face. I also like that there are moments where he leans on the deus or whatever, like, God damn it. Why aren't you better at this game? You can't make this stuff up. He's like, wow, I was in the Kings of Comedy, and big butts is what she says?

That's her answer? D.L. Hughley doesn't have to deal with this. Whoever writes the cards that flip over To reveal the answers They've started to try and make those Like funny And I think it Does not work

I think they should keep them straight But sometimes one is so baffling Like they were doing one about like Name something that sags when you get older. And the answer, the number one answer, of course, was boobs. So someone said boobs. Or a goblin's butt. A goblin's butt.

Very saggy butts. And when it flipped over, the card, they got the question right for boobs, but the card said glands of milk and honey. What? said glands of milk and honey what and it just showed it for i mean you know that you can you know how long that shot is when they flip over the thing and this the audience all yelled glands it's it it's the most insane i've ever felt and yeah it made me think that maybe I had died and I was just like, this is what is happening in my head on the operating table or something. Can I ask you a question, Jordan? Yeah.

Do you not have honey tits? No. No, I wish. I've got those sweet honey tits. Oh, man. Yeah. Not milk, though, right? No, no milk. Lemonade. Lemonade. Lemonade.

I got to go around the corner. Get to see a man about some fudge. Got to see the corner fudge man. Let's take a quick break. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jessica. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, Shamka, Lady of the Lake. Oh, these are fun. Do you remember when, speaking of the era of sun-dried tomatoes and clearly Canadian beverages, New York seltzers, all those things. Those were the days. Those were the days. Do you remember when all 12-year-old boys' t-shirts were related to, like, geckos surfing.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah, the era of the, like, surf extreme sports T-shirt for everyone, regardless of if they were into extreme sports or not. Like, I definitely wanted one of those, and 100% you couldn't have paid me enough to get on a surfboard or skateboard. those and 100 you couldn't have paid me enough to get on a surfboard or skateboard but like the prospect of a cnc hawaii or cnc music yeah no i'm not sure no maybe you're thinking of tnc surf designs yeah tnc surf with the uh surf and gorilla the uh skateboarding tiki man did you have uh chip and pepper down in America? No. Who were Chip and Pepper?

Chip and Pepper were the t-shirt company. I think it was like real life twins. But the logos on the shirt were two muscular dogs. And one was Chip and one. We had big dogs. Did you guys have big dogs? Lead follower, get out of the way. Yeah, we had. But yeah, Chip and Pepper was our equivalent of TC shirt surf shop. we had big dogs did you guys have big dogs lead follower get out of the way we had yeah but yeah

chip and pepper was our like our equivalent of tc shirt surf shot yeah gotcha i mean honestly i can't get hard unless the dogs are yoked you know end of the day yeah they were they were like bulldogs with sunglasses on it was chip and pepper wet wear wow very hip very very hip hey uh speaking of stuff that definitely won't turn off the audience it's max fun drive time baby yeah all of maximum fun this show stop podcasting yourself all the rest all supported by your memberships are thanks to every single person out there who is a Maximum Fun member. This, Jordan, believe it or not, I went and looked.

This is our 75th Max Fun Drive. Wow. Isn't that amazing? Who would have thought that we would have made it? That's the diamond anniversary. It feels like the 43rd. I know. It does.

It really does. But time passes so quickly when I'm with you, Jordan. That's the diamond anniversary. It feels like the 43rd. I know. It does. It really does. But time passes so quickly when I'm with you, Jordan. That's true. And Dave and Graham as well. Thank you. Hey, we owe the audience a reveal. We did some voting regarding our bonus content. Of course, every year, if you donate in the MaxFunDrive,

every show puts up some bonus content. And when you donate, not only do you get that year's bonus content, but all of the bonus content from the entire history of the network. So over 45 million hours. Yeah, I mean, you're going to really love the boco that Fibber McGee and Molly put up in the early 1940s. When Amos and Andy went back and reviewed their favorite episodes of Baywatch. I love the boco that Fibber McGee and Molly put up in the early 1940s. When Amos and Andy went back and reviewed their favorite episodes of Baywatch. If you thought the early episodes of this show were problematic, go ahead, George. So this year for our bonus content, we decided to take a running joke to the next level and do a review of a late period Burt Reynolds movie.

We had some fun a couple weeks ago just reading Burt Reynolds' weird IMDb with a bunch of movies he made in a fugue state that are hard to get on streaming. He would just chew gum until he was in a trance and then do four movies. And every one of those movies would explain its entire plot and premise in italics, 70s font on the poster. So we, along with Max Fun's own Drea Clark from the podcast formerly known as Who Shot Ya?

Drea Clark, we should mention, watched this movie with us and is a film professional. Yes, she is an actual expert on film. She's a film festival programmer, critic, etc. So we sat her down and I don't want to say we made her.

I think she wanted to sit down with us and watch Malone. Oh, Malone. Jordan, I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to pick the middle road here on this and say she neither wanted to nor we made her, but she was under the circumstances willing to. She did do it. We watched Malone, the tagline of which is Ex-cop, ex-FBI, explosive No, there is not one reference to him having been a cop In the entire movie

No, there is not It seems like they just added that for the tagline This thing needs to be longer Taglines, they're long Graham, you perked up when we said that Have you heard of the movie? Yeah, I most definitely have heard of Malone It was a movie that I tried to get my mom to rent from the video store on

the cover. It was him with a shotgun and fire in the background. And, uh, yeah, every, every other time we went, I wanted to get Malone.

So yeah, she always wanted to get Joe Montana sports talk football. Uh, so we watched it with Drea. We had such a fun time. It was great. We'll save our thoughts on Malone for you to listen to in the bonus content. But it was a blast. We've done a bunch of other cool stuff.

Dave and Graham, what have you guys done for BoCo over the years and do you have anything cool this year? Well, in past years we've done, we played Trivial Pursuit with Alicia Tobin. We did an episode of Nothing But Overheard. We did cool this year well in in past years we've done we played uh the trivial pursuit with alicia tobin we did an episode of nothing but overheards we did a backwards episode where we started with the end and went yeah we yeah and then we did uh a call-in show for alter egos the card guys yeah people wanted the cards appraised um and then this year, a few weeks ago, we did an episode with guest Bita Judaki.

And at the end, Graham texted me and said, oh, Dave, I lost all my media. My audio is all gone. And I said, oh, don't worry. Oh, wait a minute. I didn't record the Zoom. And so we had to rerecord that episode. But we still had the audio from me and Bita. And so Graham, for our bonus content this year,

recreated the original episode by... Wow. I don't know how he did it. That's like when Gus Van Sant remade Psycho. Yes. Yeah. Shot for shot, baby. Gus Van Sant remade Psycho. Yes.

Yeah. Shot for shot, baby. You know, it has been a very, very difficult year. And I know that... Not for me, man. Well, I mean, Graham lost that audio. Yeah, well, God opened the door sometimes. Jordan's had a lot of problems with conflicting drivers on his computer.

So it's been a tough year. And I know that I have been very grateful for the MaxFun community in helping get me through that year. Not just Jordan, certainly Jordan and Brian, but all the folks in the MaxFun community. And I've also heard from folks who said that the work that we do has helped them get through a tough year. You know, all the time, MaxFun is about that, right? Like, we really do try and have a unifying spirit among our shows and within our audience.

But this year, that felt particularly significant. So our thanks to everybody who was a part of that, listening to shows, sharing shows, sharing thoughts and feelings with us, supporting us, being supported by us. I was very, very glad to have the job that I have this year. And the reason that I have that, the reason this is a job is because of the members of Maximum Fun. Like I am still stunned 75 Max Fun drives in that this actually counts as a professional gig.

That like we have me and Jordan here getting paid to do this work. We have Sonny D, Brian Fernandez getting paid to do this work. We have Sonny D, Brian Fernandez getting paid to do this work. Val, who's video streaming tonight, is getting paid to be here. Dave and Graham, not. What? I'm out of here. Yeah, sorry, but they get paid for their other show. You're getting a lovely muffin basket.

No, it is awesome. It's really awesome that everybody who works at MaxFun can do this as a job. It's so awesome. And it's interesting kind of what is happening to podcasting. I certainly have some friends who do or did podcasts for some networks or concerns that got bought by giant companies and now bankroll joe rogan so uh it is nice that you know we don't have to worry about vc money or where it's going it's just nice listeners who like the shows and want to give a little bit to keep them going and get some nice stuff in return and it's it's it's great. It's great to be able to make a show for a relatively small audience that just loves it, as opposed to having to worry about getting it out to a bazillion people who don't really care about it.

But yeah, it's nice saying that this is a viable thing to do as long as there's a small number of people who really like it. Yeah, if you're out there and you've made it through this year intact, if you're still standing and you're able, you can go to MaximumFun.org slash join and become a member of Maximum Fun. There are many levels starting at five bucks a month. at five bucks a month. If you are having a hard time because of this terrible year or just in general, we understand, don't go to MaximumFun.org slash join. But if you are one of those folks who is doing all right, why not sign up because other folks can't? I think that's just as valid a reason if you want to go to Maximfund.org join um the people who

are able to still support us and we're so grateful for every single one are uh the reason that this thing didn't sink our operation we're very grateful yeah thank you so much to everybody who does this it's so awesome and it just it it feels great it just like feels nice to be able to make stuff for cool people um because like the max fun audience is very cool and i know that like a lot of times when you're making stuff on the internet you don't get to pick your fans you just get some fans and then have to deal with them but um i feel so thankful that like the max fun community is cool people that i like i think a lot of people when i talk to them and tell them that I do podcasts,

they're like, oh, so I bet you have to deal with podcast fans. I'm like, no, they're great. They're really nice and cool. And like some of them are sending me a lot of Sonic the Hedgehog fan art, but honestly, I don't mind. Yeah, it's fun.

It's so nice. It's so nice to make stuff for cool people that you like as opposed to, you know, a giant bazillion dollar company. Really, really feels good. Yeah. So thanks to all the folks who are already members of Maximum Fun. Thanks to everybody who's becoming a member of Maximum Fun.

If you're ready to be one of those folks, go to MaximumFun.org slash join. We'll be back in just a second. I'm Jordan Jessica. dot org slash join we'll be back in just a second on jordan jessica it's jordan jessica i'm jesse thorne america's radio sweetheart jordan morris boy detective graham clark godzilla versus king kong dave shumka what Radio Sweetheart. Jordan Morris, Boy Detective. Graham Clark, Godzilla vs. King Kong. Dave Shumka. What? So Graham, you're not fighting Godzilla and King Kong.

You are the movie. Godzilla vs. Okay, you are the movie. You're sort of embodying the spirit of Godzilla vs. King Kong. I do a lot of community outreach. Thank you.

Thank you. He visits kids in the hospital. I'm Godzilla vs. King Kong. What are you in for? kids in the hospital i'm godzilla versus king kong what are you in for i'm the movie do you like the part where i go into the hollow earth man can i tell you a quick a quick godzilla versus king kong anecdote so i have not seen the movie godzilla versus king kong i'm busy watching the movie Godzilla vs. Ghidorah. But my daughter is really interested

in the movie Godzilla vs. King Kong. We have not let her see it yet because we're thinking it's kind of maybe a little bit too much of a grown-up movie. But the good news is that we did go to the playground with Elliot Kalin. And Elliot Kalin broke down all the reasons that

he was upset by the implausibility of the science in the movie Godzilla vs. King Kong. So thanks to Elliot, my daughter got to have the experience of seeing Godzilla vs. King Kong without us having to let her watch an adult film. Interesting part of that movie, it has a heroic podcaster. Really? Yeah, a heroic podcaster saves the day. Is it Joe Rogan? It is, yes. God damn it. He saves the day by teaching

Godzilla and Kong to be intellectually open to all ideas. To all ideas. Sure. And learning about things. And then they all smoke DMT. It is not a good movie. When something momentous happens to you,

like you smoke DMT with some kaijus and Joe Rogan, give us a call, 206-9844-FUN, or send us a voice memo at jjgoe at maximumfun.org. Just be careful. Don't send a voice memo at jjgoe at MaximumFun.org. Just be careful. Don't send a voice memo to Dave and Graham because Dave will complain about it on air. He'll be mad at you that you did such a good job recording the audio, even though you're his old friend who made his podcast the second podcast ever on Maximum Fun.

MaximumFun.org slash join if you want to support Stop Podcasting yourself. We've got a big lot of stuff planned this year. Let's play our first call. Hey, this is Connor calling from Vancouver with a momentous occasion. I live in a pretty dicey part of Vancouver, and my girlfriend dropped her phone the other day and lost it, and we were pretty bummed. But we were eventually contacted

because we got an emergency message on the screen of the phone. The phone was found by an unhosed gentleman here, super good homie who found it, and refused to take money when he gave it back to us. Just a nice reminder that, like, you know, there's nice people everywhere. And it was a super nice thing that he did. This guy with nothing wouldn't take anything for helping us out. And it's just, you know, I've had a bad time,

and it's nice to see some good humanity out there. Love you guys. Be good. We love you, too. Thanks for being good. Thanks, Connor. Vancouver sounds like a beautiful place I literally here's what happened to me today I was in my car I got a phone call I never get a phone call

I had to pull over it was my sister-in-law my brother's wife and I pulled over and it wasn't her it was a kid who had found her phone calling me what and I was like oh uh yeah uh what's

the like what's the logic of how do we get the how do we arrange for you to get the because you can't call her huh okay so no wait i'll just tell my brother but we can't figure out how he called from a locked phone. Well, you know, he's a kid. Kids are tech savvy. He's a hacker. Maybe you were in your sister's medical information, and he's a first responder. Yeah, maybe he had like a selection of thumbnails or thumbprints. There's one thing I know about Gen Z is that they love collecting thumbprints. There's one thing I know about Gen Z is that they love collecting thumbprints.

All of my favorite TikToks are thumbprint related. Right, yes. So we've been doing this thing on the show, Dave and Graham. We have basically boundless creativity and definitely haven't hit the bottom of our ideas for this

show. So we're full of our ideas for this show. So we're full of new ideas for segments that are always winners and always generate a lot of calls in our, frankly, huge audience. And so what we've done is just had people call in to those various segments. And the only thing is we have so many beloved segments that we have been asking people to identify what segment they're calling in for at the beginning of their call. So here is our first call. Hey, Jordan, Jesse, and guests. I have a secret that I am taking to my grave. When I was about 12 or 13 years old, and my brother was about 10 or 9, we went to this giant abandoned field to launch rockets with my father. Now, these are like rockets you don't mess around with.

They're level C or D. I don't remember all the ins and outs of it, but they're really powerful rockets that go off really, really, really high in the sky. Anyways, as we were lighting it off, one of them tipped over and knocked out my brother almost instantly when it went off, careening into his face. Now my dad freaked out, picked my brother up, shook him. Don't do that. Then he kind of came to and we realized that he was okay and my dad took him to the doctors

they gave him a clear check and we were told to never ever ever tell my mother and if we didn't we would get a free blackbuster rental for the next six months every Friday and we did get those rentals my mom still doesn't know

she'll never know. Well, hope you guys are having fun. Previously, the dad was charging them to rent videos on Friday. It sounds like the dad arranged it with Blockbuster somehow. It's like, listen, my kid got hit in the face with a rocket.

I don't want mom to know. Give us the Joe Montana sports talk football. One copy of Malone, please. You know what? If I was that guy they called in, I probably would have held out

for something better than a video. I would have held out for, I don't know, a Philip Seedy interactive. Bare minimum. a lot of great stuff you can rent at blockbuster with that video where the cartoon all-stars team up to tell you not to do drugs that's a free rental jordan that's in the that's in the public interest section you

and i both know that that was the the asterisk on on the deal with dad uh there's a free rental every week at Blockbuster. It's Magic Johnson and Arsenio Hall talking about AIDS. It's a free rental, but it's Michelangelo teaming up with Slimer to teach you CPR. Dave and Graham, did you guys ever rent a piece of equipment at the video store because that was

something that I never got to do I did not have the video game systems they had there at the video store I never got to do that weekend rental of a Sega Genesis or whatever even though it was my greatest dream um when we were on holiday once we were staying in a place that didn't have a vcr so we rented a vcr from the like bait shop slash uh movie rental place slash like where two old guys sat around drinking coffee and telling stories and they had they had a they had a vhs and it came in a very specialized carrying case it was that's all that would ever be able to fit in there and it had a shoulder strap for people on the go um and uh yeah it was it was fantastic i didn't know that that was possible when i i had my seventh or eighth birthday

uh we rented a video camera uh because i wanted to do a talent show for my birthday. Wow. Does this tape still exist? I don't know if the tape still exists. It's me. Bonus content idea. Yeah. I remember my talent was

I sang the Gilligan's Island theme. And I remember one little bit of the choreography. For the millionaire and his wife, I had my dad's credit card, and then I pretended to cut it with scissors for the wife. I don't know why that makes sense. I don't think it does.

Yeah. I mean, if there's one thing I know, and... Yeah, I mean, if there's one thing I... I mean, I'm not married, but if there's one thing I know about wives is they're always cutting up credit cards. Especially the wives of millionaires. Mm-hmm. And the wives of seven-year-olds, was that correct?

Yeah, that's right, yes. Were you ever super into Gilligan's Island as a seven-year-old? I don't know. I was into television, all of it. That's right. Is old TV still on TV? I feel like there used to

be, in the 80s, there was still like, you could watch hours of 60s TV. Yeah, I think it's probably on IMDb TV. I think that's probably what IMDb TV is. That's where I can see Count Dracula. Yeah. And Banana Man.

Yeah. Maximumfun.org slash join for more of this great stuff. Yeah. Remembering British cartoons that were weirdly imported to other countries.

See, it is kind of interesting that like we just because, you know, TV was TV. We just had to like sit through 50s and 60s shit because that was that was. Yeah. I wonder if like previous generations will even know what. But I guess like kids like friends now. Right. I guess that's the equivalent. Right. So but they can choose not to like they they could they could not watch friends they don't have to get through friends to get to seinfeld like we do that's right yeah plow through you don't have to watch mash to watch letterman exactly dave and i have both said that when mash came on tv you were like uh-oh we're in adult waters this is not good this is not gonna be funny this is gonna be sad yeah i had like problems going to sleep as a kid and it like kind of

stressed me out and i always knew that i was up too late when i heard the mash theme song and it made me panic so every time i hear suicide is painless i start to panic Like at a dance club or whatever. Yeah, you know, Trader Joe's. A lot of Cat Stevens and then the theme to M.A.S.H. That truly was the golden age of the melancholic sitcom. Like, I feel like it's not just M.A.S.H. I think it's also Taxi that always felt that way to me. that always felt that way to me. It's just about shows about like

with big laugh tracks that were mostly about loneliness and sadness. WKRP. That one I thought. WKRP, very mournful, lonely show. What's the one with Snyder the handyman that had a lot of sadness? One Day at a Time.

Snyder the handyman. One Day at a Time. Night Court was that was fun very sad brian says that was for fun adults night court yeah god my dad loved night court so much like just he would just get so pumped about night court reruns oh it was fantastic just grab those pliers change the channel the night court's coming on. Okay, let's take another call. Hi, Jordan, Jesse, Sonny D and guests. I'm your guest, Elliot Kalin.

This is Nick from South Dakota calling in for your long-running segment, Dreams About Jordan Moving to Pasadena. So the other night I dreamt that my girlfriend and I went to visit Jordan in his new home in Pasadena, and he was showing us around all the cool new spots he had discovered. We went bowling. We got some street tacos and some ice cream. And at the end of the day, we decided to go skinny dipping in a river with some other people.

So we were taking our clothes off, and Jordan gets his pants off. And he just has the biggest dong I have ever seen in my life. And everybody was real impressed and congratulating him. And, yeah, it was just really impressive and special. I have ever seen in my life. Everybody is real impressed and congratulating him. And yeah, it was just really impressive and special. So Jordan, I hope you enjoy your new home and congrats on the big massive horn. So proud of you, Jordan. There's a lot of stuff.

Congratulations, buddy. Thanks. It is, yes, it is odd. Just the sentence, and everyone was congratulating him you know what i imagine was that like uh that medal ceremony at the end of star wars right then i wink Chewbacca. Yeah. I mean, they have Pasadena pegs.

I mean, I've only been here a month, but yeah, it's been all ice cream, street tacos, skinny dipping, bowling. In the river. In the river, skinny dipping in the Pasadena River. Yeah. Let's take one more call. Hello, it's John Dickerson. I'm calling in for John Dickerson. Wait, hold on!

Hold on! John Dickerson from Meet the Fucking Press? Holy shit. John Dickerson from 60 Goddamn Minutes. John Dickerson from CBS What Morning? This? Who writes books? Writes great books

on presidential history. Yeah. Okay, press play, Brian. Hello, it's John Dickerson. I'm calling in for John Dickerson calls in to give you the latest update on his oil pressure and wiper fluid. Both are A-okay, but the watchword is constant vigilance.

For me and for you. Good day to you. Thank you, John Dickerson. I have honestly never enjoyed anything more. I have never enjoyed anything more than that god damn it what a guy that's all John Dickerson baby we didn't give him any material

that's John Dickerson doesn't need it you just get you just point the phone at Dickerson and let him go it's like working with Vince Vaughn did John Dickerson hire Bruce Valanche? I can't speak to that. He could certainly afford it. The guy has network news money.

Wow, that's amazing. I think that came straight from, not just straight from the mind of John Dickerson. We all know about John Dickerson's extraordinary mind. Also straight from the heart of John Dickerson. Beautiful. This is a guy who cares grant david graham do you know who this is no no idea was that a wrong number

he seems like uh yeah he's like a news guy he's my he's my favorite news guy uh easily my favorite news guy one of my maybe one of my top guys period um and i when i first i joined instagram this year i had not been on the gram um oh graham that's your that's fun you guys had some fun with that on the show i did a a one-man show that traveled around called instagram which was literally just pictures of my instagram account that's amazing a lot of fun uh i wish i could watch that show um so i joined and that's you know it's kind of a goof i was like well i'm just gonna follow i'll just follow john dickerson and like you know for the first month that i'm on instagram and that'll be kind of fun and i did and it was great and i have followed more people since then and honestly it has not gotten

better yeah John Dickerson's got a beautiful dog dog scenery news some funny stuff so a beautiful family gorgeous family on Dickerson does it all it's the everyone else fucking sucks compared to him on Instagram everybody is congratulating Jordan on his crank. They should be congratulating John Dickerson on his beautiful family. Thank you. Hey, everyone, everyone who was down skinny dipping with us in the Pasadena River after we got ice cream and street tacos, instead of applauding

for the python, applaud Dickerson on his fucking pristine-ass social media. Guy's a treasure, and he called our show. We are so lucky. We are so lucky. Can I say something?

Yes. If I have one problem with Generation Z, and I'll grant you, I've got a few problems with Generation Z. Well, hoarding all those fingerprints. Yeah. They don't know anything about Clearly Canadian, that's for sure.

They'll learn. Don't know what it's like to have to watch mash to watch Letterman. Don't remember the Snapple lady. But Jordan, if I have one problem with generation Z, it's this. Too many of them are congratulating you on your dick when they should be congratulating the family

on dick. John Dickerson, that is. Nice. Yes. You know, when you're right, you're right. Thank you, and that was definitely worth the build-up. This has been worth the build-up. If you think this has been worth the build-up,

send a self-reported stamp envelope to Maximum Fun, care of 832 Grand Rapids, Minnesota, 95538. If you don't, go to MaximumFun.org slash join. Will you have people call in and do a long story that was worth the build-up? Is that a possible segment? Oh, we should. That would kill all kinds of time.

Yeah. That would be great. People should do that. Do you think we could get Dallas Rains to call in on that one? Dallas Rains, Nora O'Donnell, Wolf Blitzer. What's Blitzer doing?

Jack shit. Blitzer's not doing anything. Not since the Gulf War ended. Yeah. Just scratching his beard and looking confused. Oh, Graham, I wanted to ask you,

what was that, what was that brisket you popped earlier? That was a local brand called steamworks and uh it's it was a pilsner it was a pilsner steamworks from here in vancouver is this a two beer record for you yeah absolutely this is yeah and then i'm gonna go over to the pool hall hang out with all the teens dave what are you what are you drinking over there what what are you drinking over there what are you chugging down oh I finished mine it was a pop shop

orange soda I thought it looked like you were you were drinking a novelty soft drink yeah yeah yeah this is like a drink for our audience at home this is like a drink that looks like it was purchased at a candy store with a big rocket in the front window.

Yeah. I mean, we're trying to raise money for a podcasting company with a big rocket in the front window. That's fair. Great connection. Great synergy. Great synergy. So, Dave, did you get that by going to MaximumFun.org slash join? Yeah, I clicked on my favorite shows.

We'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jesse Go. It's Jordan Jesse Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. Graham Clark, weekend dad. Dave Shumka, little Dave Shumka. So producer Val, production fellow at MaximumFun.org, is streaming this into our Facebook page. We're meeting via teleconference, the teleconference being sent live to people who are staying up late to watch it. And there is this comment stream. I

have not been looking at the comment stream during the recording of this program. Look, I've been focusing on the MaxFunDrive and people going to MaximumFun.org slash join. That's what I've been focusing on. However however i just checked in with the comment section it only shows three comments at a time and this was the main comment with no you know one of them was like cool or something like that and one of them was like this is fun and five hundred dollars a day ask me how and then there was one from a guy named Ron. And this is the totality of his comment, which, again, was just appeared sandwiched between some other comments.

It said, actually, we're fighting duergar, which are evil dwarves. But I figured ogres was more universally easy to get behind. You know, he's right. He's not wrong about it right like joe biden can try and bring america together all he wants he can try ultimately he's gonna need ogres to do it yes they're very strong they're a mighty race a lot of people think a lot of people think due regards is gonna be enough but uh i think we can agree that ogres are much more universally easy to get behind come on let's come on orcs come on trolls tree people griffins hydras jocks sportos preppies

whiskey drinks cider drink cider drink dongs that remind you of the best times. This is our show, Jordan, not their show. Their show is the one where Dave says the lyrics of Tub Thumping. Jesse, I don't listen to either show. I don't know what happens on the shows. I'm more of a retail nightmares guy.

If you listen to either show, it's MaxFun Drive time. We're asking you if you're able to go to MaximumFun.org slash join and join the thousands of folks who are supporting the programming of Maximum Fun. You know, a lot of folks might not actually even know how the MaxFunDrive works, like what it is. We only do this once a year. This is an 11-day operation. It is. We only do this once a year. This is an 11 day operation. But Maximum Fund, almost the significant majority of our revenue and the money that gets paid to our hosts comes directly from the membership support of members of Maximum Fund. Yeah. If you if you're nice enough to go to Maximum Fund dot org slash join and keep keep the operation going,

fund.org slash join and keep, uh, keep the operation going. You are, you're literally making sure that the podcasts get made and, that everybody involved with them is, uh, getting paid. And that's awesome.

And, you know, and that's like an altruistic reason to get involved. Like that's a good hearted, like selfless reason to get involved. Yeah. But if you're, uh,

if you're a, a craven little goblin looking out for number one, if you're a do regard, if you're a real do regard and you're a craven little goblin looking out for number one. If you're a duragar. If you're a real duragar. And you're like, how can this benefit me? Me meaning you. And you meaning a duragar. You meaning a duragar.

Here's all the stuff you can get if you donate to MaximumFun.org. For five bucks a month, you get all that bonus content we mentioned i i see here that it says over 200 hours of bonus content from all the shows there's videos there's music there's all kinds of cool stuff uh some stuff that we've made some stuff that spy is made um and yeah definitely if you're hey if you're maybe you're hitting the road for a little uh for a little road trip or vacation this year that That BoCo is going to come in handy. We recorded a show on a goddamn boat, Jordan. We recorded a show on a boat.

It's not our best work. Not our best work. We played a drinking game where we got pretty messed up. Jesse drank weed soda. Me and Ben Harrison drank warm seltzers. Ben's wife, Rachel, had to pick us up. Five bucks a month to get all that bonus content up five bucks a month you get all that bonus content 10 bucks a month you get all that bonus content plus one of 38 enamel pens uh perfect for

jean jackets cork boards lapels and fanny packs these are designed by megan lincott uh awesome awesome artist and and painter um so this year should say, because each show has its own pin. Guys, what's the spy pin this year? Graham? Dave, if I ask you the question, what does A&W stand for? Hamburgers and Whoopier. Yes, that is correct. That is correct.

That is the pin. Can I tell you? I recently, inspired by fellow max fun podcast the flop house i watched the movie supergirl uh with my daughter my daughter got my daughter gets really excited to watch things that elliot wants to watch and um uh elliot is basically my daughter's hero um and so we watch grac Gracie and I watched Supergirl together. Supergirl is a very odd movie that actually I kind of enjoyed. Yeah, Supergirl's a blast.

Yeah, a lot of weird, crazy stuff. Some really good outfits, some neat effects, some completely inexplicable things. some completely inexplicable things. One of the inexplicable things is that a solid 20% of the movie is dedicated to A&W root beer. There are so many billboards in the background for A&W root beer, and there is a part where these two would-be muggers try to take advantage of Supergirl

when she's not wearing her outfit, and she kicks their ass. But one of them is wearing an A&W root beer t-shirt in that scene. And all I could think the entire scene was hamburgers and root beer. Did she say, oh, you're trying to mug me? The only mug I'm interested in is a frosty mug of A&W root beer. The one with bite.

The Jordan-Jesse-Go pin this year is a cup of tea that says yummy on it. This is a tribute to Jordan's signature character, Herbal Tea Kahneman. Signature character, you mean good friend? You mean my good friend who

shows up when I'm not here? Yes. Every show has a pin. There's a bubble pin in there. Signature character, you mean good friend? You mean my good friend who shows up when I'm not here? Yes. Yes, every show has a pin. There's a bubble pin in there. All the shows, pick your fave. Oh, and speaking of tea, you get a special blend of loose leaf interstellar orange tea from the Wishes Tea Company. And speaking of tea, I'm going to spill a little right now.

Jordan's got a big hog.ave let's all celebrate no don't celebrate my hog guys oh boy i'm so embarrassed this is supposed to be about you uh so for 20 bucks a month not only do you get your favorite enamel pen, a letterpress membership card, but you also get the take a minute tea kit. It's the perfect accompaniment to 20 minutes of rest, relaxation and hot drinks. Atomic Pixies designed a lovely art nouveau inspired 5.5 tall tea tin to hold your loose leaf tea bags, pins, whatever you fancy. tin to hold your loose leaf tea bags pins whatever you fancy and wishes tea company has made a special blend of loose leaf interstellar orange tea uh you can get that for 20 bucks a month 35 bucks a month you get a rocket insulated cup you get to take a minute tea kit your pin your max fun membership card all the bonus content uh there's levels at $50 a month where you get a custom metal MaxFun card. For $100 a month, you get HQ access pass and immortalization at MaxFun HQ.

Jesse, can you talk a little bit about this? Yeah, we will actually take those members, the folks who join at that Golden Eagle level, we will have them bronzed and mounted on the walls of MaxFun HQ. This is something we are incredibly, incredibly excited about. But you can find everything about all the levels at MaximumFun.org. What I want to emphasize here is obviously just the shitty garbagest of all shitty garbage years. And at the end of the day, if you're able to become a member of MaximumFun.org at any level, our gratitude goes out to you. And so does the gratitude of the folks

who aren't able to become a member of Maximum Fun right now. If you can't join right now, we understand. There's a thousand things you can do. Keep listening. Tweet about the show. Tweet about the MaxFunDrive. Talk a friend who's a listener into becoming a member.

We're grateful for all of your efforts on behalf of Maximum Fun in this special time. And again, if you are in a position, if you've come out of all this nonsense doing okay, If you've come out of all this nonsense doing okay, remember that it's because of folks like you that we're able to keep the lights on through tough times like these. So special thank you to all of you who go to MaximumFun.org slash join. Truly every year, but especially this year, anyone who joins at any level gets my infinity level of gratitude. There is no gradations between my gratitude based on level. It's the difference between doing it and not doing it if you're able. So go to MaximumFun.org slash join. It starts at five bucks a month, and we're grateful for every single member. Yeah, it's definitely, I think so many people do that $5 a month level. Like, obviously, if you have the means to upgrade or do a higher level and you want

some of those cool prizes, do it, do it. But also, hey, if you have five bucks a month, if you want to throw your favorite podcasters a buck per episode, it totally helps. It's what most people do and it's it's basically the reason that the lights are on at maxfund.org is uh is that people kind of come in and give it whatever level they can and yeah even that five dollar level is super important you get all the bonus content and it's uh yeah i mean i think uh i mean name name of name a better value in streaming entertainment five bucks a month i dare you i mean i like hbo max

that's got that warner classic movies what's that called sure you got a nice yeah you got turner classic movies and of course the crunchy roll tab but that's that jesse that's like 15 bucks a month this is this is five bucks a month and it doesn't have an episode fucking uh dragon ball z didn't record a podcast on a boat. That's true. You know what I mean? And Attack on Titan didn't record an episode where they lost the audio and then Graham came in and redubbed his end. Attack on Titan's on Netflix.

I don't think that's on HBO Max. I'm sorry. But still, we're a better value than Netflix. We're a better value than stupid Netflix. Yeah. Even though it is, I have a hard time imagining my life without Lillehammer. The show that launched it all.

A New York gangster in Norway? That's a question we're still asking. All these years later. In Norway? Can I very briefly explain the logistics of how this works? Because there are now dozens of shows that are part of MaximumFun.org. Maybe this is the only one you listen to. Maybe you listen to a few more.

Hopefully you listen to Stop Podcasting Yourself, because I do. That shit's hilarious. But however many shows you listen to, when you become a member, you tell us what shows you listen to. Your membership money every month is just split among those shows. A little bit comes off the top to pay for the MaxFunDrive and, you know, what's going on at MaxFun generally. But the significant majority of it is just split evenly among the shows that you listen to. So you are really directly supporting the shows that you care about when you become a member of Maximum Fun. This is not like a situation,

I feel like I say this every year, but it's not a situation where all the money goes into a big pile and then everyone lines up and I decide who gets what. This is a situation where you are directly supporting your favorite creators. And we're very proud that we do it that way. And we're very proud that many, many folks are making a living or able to make room in their professional lives to make podcasts because of your membership. So if you want to be part of that, we're grateful for it. Go to MaximumFun.org slash join. That's MaximumFun.org slash join. And we'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jesse Go. It's Jordan, Jesse Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, Dave, let's change your Twitter handle from at Dave Shumka to at Barstool Dave. Hey, Saturdays are for the boys, boys.

Always felt that way. Okay, so as we mentioned, we've been live streaming this episode of the show, and we went ahead and asked for some questions from the audience. Brian, did we get any questions from the audience? Yeah, we got a couple. What do we got, Brian? Someone asked, what's the best Tillamook ice cream flavor? Fuck, I fuck with that Huckleberry.

That Huckleberry is what's up. So I've been, just so you guys know, Dave and Graham, Dave, you're of course well-known as an ice cream influencer. You tend to go down to the DQ, if I'm not mistaken. Yeah, I mean, DQ is one of the places I go. There's a local place I go to called Rain or Shine here that I like. That sounds nice. What's the best flavor over there at the Rain or Shine?

Oh, it's this one with sponge toffee in it. It's like the malted milk. Oh, wow. That's a great flavor. Sponge toffee, that's the kind with bubbles in it yeah oh shit and malted milk ice cream is one of the absolute best that's tremendous sorry tillamook i'm out i'm in on rainy day what's it called rain or shine holy mackerel what do you get at the dq blizzard dip cone i, you can't go wrong with any of it.

But I like whenever they have a brownie thing with whipped cream and chocolate sauce and soft serve. I mean, it's all got soft serve. And if they're out of that, then Dave just gets a cake to himself. I go to the DQ all the time, but just because I love those tasty burgers. I love to buy food at the DQ all the time, but just because I love those tasty burgers. I love to buy food at the DQ. Oh, yeah, yeah. I've never even had the dessert. Hot eats, cool treats?

Yeah, exactly. Is that the DQ slogan? I've been trying to become an... So they started carrying Tillamook brand ice cream. Tillamook is a dairy brand in the United States. I don't know if you guys get it up there, but... I know Tillamook Cheddar, the talented, artistic

Jack Russell Terrier. Is that like a famous Instagram dog? No, this is like 20 years ago. This is the dog that used to I think they would put colored paper down and it would scratch on the paper.

It would scratch a little. And it would predict who wins the World Cup? Yeah, it would scratch on the paper it would scratch a little and it would predict who wins the world cup yeah it would scratch it's like you know madness onto it it's dog ramblings into some kind of so it was like an art dog it was an art dog like an art elephant yeah yeah got it uh the the tillamook brand is known for their cheddar. This is a dairy brand of the Pacific Northwest, known for its cheddar. But recently here in Southern California, we've started getting its ice cream in our grocery stores. And it's definitely the best ice cream you can buy in a grocery store around here. And a lot of nice flavors. But I got to go with that Mountain Huckleberry.

Brian, we got anything else in the chat there? Yeah, what else is in there? Yeah, another fun one here. Who's ripped the most pair of pants? That is a fun one. The Incredible Hulk. Yeah. I don't know.

That guy's pants stay, well, I guess the legs rip. The legs rip, yeah. The seat and crotch stay intact. Yeah, he's got some good stretch. Good stretch denim. I haven't ripped a lot. I'm going to say three in my time. I think I have not ripped a lot of pants.

Oh, I ripped a swimsuit recently. That's like a pants you swim. That was because of your... Yeah, that's because of the that's like a pants you swim that was because of your yeah that's because of the uh the downstairs monster shirt congratulations by the way congratulations on ripping through your swimsuit i mean everybody offers you their congratulations jordan everybody thank you everyone down at the river yes yeah uh i would say that i think i don't think i've ripped a ton of pants as an adult but i I think I've frequently ripped pants as a kid.

So I think I, I bet I... Are we just talking about ass up? That's... Or like the crotch area? Any ripping. I think any ripping. Like if you accidentally ripped your hem, that's fine. Or like if you snag your knee on a hook or something.

Or jeans get ripped if you own them on them. I do a lot of running in hook-heavy areas, so I have snagged a lot of knees. I mean, if we're talking asses, yeah, I'm like three or four, but if just like torn pants, I'm like 50. dave was in nom but i mean that's because of jordan's crank right yeah my my crank it's so big it rips other people's pants

who live in a different country that's how big this thing is guys that's what OPP stood for. Goddamn sausages. I don't know what character I'd be. I think this character is Dennis Miller's comedy about Jordan's giant crank. Yes. Hey, babe. Call Norman Schwarzkopf, because Jordan's

crank's getting out of control, and I'm gonna have to read the Epic of Gilgamesh, babe. What are you talking about? You're conservative now? I think what I was being there was like early 2000s comedy character. You know, like when comedy was about dudes, dudes like, oh, my fucking sausage is too big, man. It's fucking ripping pants in other countries. Oh, the Kool-Aid man.

Pow! That's what he says. Comedy in the round. Graham, how about you? Pants ripping? I've had plenty of pants ripping. The last time was getting on a bicycle, which I haven't done in years, and my pants ripped, and then just kind of riding on a bicycle with my balls

very on the seat and cool and then what i do every year not quite ripping jeans but i cut whatever last year's most disappointing jeans were they get turned into jean shorts the following summer nice hell yeah have you made this year's shorts yet i made one pair the crotch is nearly done so i was like you put in your service let's have one summer with you and then send you off to valhalla kind of putting them out to stud graham i like the idea of you like holding up the shears to the blue jeans and saying, you've disappointed me.

You are the weakest link. Well, Dave and Graham, what a joy it has been as ever to have you on Jordan, Jesse go. You guys are just the absolute greatest. If anybody in the Jordan, Jesse go audience has not listened to stop podcasting yourself. It's like our show without me talking over everyone. It is a really wonderful program that I listen to all the time for fun for

myself. I have no professional obligation to listen, but I choose to listen because I love the show. The original max fun show that was not just me making it in my apartment was referred to Max Fun by people on the Maximum Fun message board. When we had a message board on our website, people there were talking about

how great Stop Podcasting Yourself was yourself was turned out it was just dave um doing that i heard it's really good i say we let him go the message board why are you doing a voice um but it true it truly is one of the greatest, funniest shows in the world. Certainly the funniest show in Canada where it's won over 75 Best Comedy Podcast Awards. How many are you guys looking at in your Best Comedy Podcast in Canada? We won three. We're hoping for number 76 this year. I mean, yes, big number.

That's great because you get a trombone every year. Womp, big number. That's great because you get a trombone every year. Okay, that was me playing one of the trombones. Dave Graham, thank you again for coming on Jordan Jesse Go. Always nice to get to see you and talk to you. Thanks for having us. Thank you so much. If you're out there, you're not yet a member of Maximum Fun, or you want to upgrade your membership, it's fun.

It's easy. Go to MaximumFun.org slash join. Don't miss out on the opportunity. And make sure to go to MaximumFun.org before May 14th, because that's when the Max Fun Drive is ending. And we have all kinds of special stuff. There's a calendar up there. We're doing stuff every single night of the week. We're

doing something or other. I just saw Stu is doing Instagram lives with Elliot and Dan on Instagram from the Flophouse. All kinds of great stuff. McElroy's have special stuff planned. Dre and Alonso and Ify have special stuff planned. All that's up at MaximumFun.org. Alonso and Ify have special stuff planned. All that's up at MaximumFun.org. Our buddy Ken Plume is leading MaxFun Trivia on the 7th, and I'm going to play with our buddy Riley Silverman. I think that's going to be a lot of fun. I think we're going to have a nice time.

We've got a lot of cool stuff coming up over on Barstool. We're doing our fantasy boob draft. Can I say just this evening my friend hooked me up if you go to Wrestlemania.ca it goes to my website so wow

congratulations Graham that's really cool that's MaximumFun.org our producer is Brian Sunny D. Fernandez thanks to Producer Val on the video. Our theme music, Love You by The Free Design, courtesy of The Free Design and Light in the Attic Records. Jordan is on Twitter at Jordan underscore Morris. I'm at Jesse Thorne.

We're also on Instagram. Jordan is Jordan David Morris. I am put.this.on. You can find us on Reddit, maximumfun.reddit.com. You can hashtag it JJGo on Twitter or on Instagram

if you take a picture of yourself yucking it up about Jordan's monster crank. And yeah, that website. That's something to laugh at, Jesse. Something to applaud. It's like a laugh of wonder. It's like a ha ha ha.

I can't wrap my mind around how beautiful this is. Right. People are always laughing at waterfalls. Exactly. Ha ha ha. Look at it go. Ha ha ha. Old faithful.

She is as beautiful as they say. ha ha ha old faithful she is as beautiful as they say i've never laughed so hard as when i visited the grand canyon maximum fun.org slash join we'll talk to you next time on jordan jessica maximum fun.org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported