Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Nerds Nerding Nerds, with Hal Lublin

Episode Date: November 7, 2024

On this week’s podcast, we welcome back podcaster and voice actor, Hal Lublin (We Got This, Tights and Fights), to chat about clown business, Icing, vehicles in the home, cheesesteak preferences, and more!Be sure to get our new 'Ack Tuah' shirt in the Max Fun store.Or, grab an 'Ack Tuah' mug!Follow the podcast on Instagram and send us your dank memes!Check out Jesse’s thrifted clothing store, Put This On.Jordan Morris will be at the Berkeley Public Library on Saturday, November 9th, signing copies of Youth Group! Come see Judge John Hodgman: Road Court  live in a town near you! Jesse and John will be all over the country so don't miss your change to see them. Check the events page to find out where! Follow brand new producer, Steven Ray Morris, on Instagram.

Hey everyone, producer Stephen Ray Morris here. Jordan, Jesse and I wanted to mention up top that this episode was recorded before the election and there's no election talk in it. Hope you're taking care of yourself and each other. Enjoy. Give a little time for the child within you. Don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you.

It's Jordan Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's Radio Sweetheart, and with me is the greatest friend of all time. The champion friend of history. Some are calling me the greatest friend, some are calling me a hero. I'm not calling myself that. I would never sound as far as saying it. Sorry, Peter Fraunfelder that I've been friends with since I was two and he was one. Sorry Jodie Scott. Wow. Who was born in a hospital room next to the hospital room I was born in. Gosh, I've left Scott.

You guys aren't taking my child to see Terrifier 3. Yeah, I'm excited to. I'm excited to see Terrifier 3 with Grace. So this is what happened at my house. My daughter Grace, who's 13 years old, is completely unbothered by gruesome horror movies. She doesn't even... It's just interesting to her. It's not even like... Is it like she's into like the prosthetics

or the like the craft of it? I can't tell what she likes. I mean, it's gross. Sure. It's awful. I mean, it's not like morally bankrupt as far as I'm concerned. I just don't want to look at it.

She doesn't care. To her, a movie with blood spurting out of things is the same amount of uncomfortable as I don't know, Back to the Future. Sure. Like the same- The cringe comedy of The Office. as, I don't know, Back to the Future. Sure. Like, the same- The cringe comedy of The Office. It doesn't bother her at all.

Now, I don't like horror movies in general. And while I have offered to watch the movie The Vovitch with her, she's not interested in seeing that movie for whatever reason. To Artie. To whatever. It's elevated horror. No elevated horror. Not interested in, yeah, not interested in creepy vibes or whatever goes in there.

I even offered to watch The Exorcist and was, I'm like, look, I want The Exorcist. That's supposed to be an amazing movie. It'll probably upset me. That gets pretty gross. Yeah. But I got the nae nae on that one. So Grace knows that I'm not going to watch something that I really don't want to watch.

I mean, I agreed to watch what's called Return to Horror High because it was what she proposed as a George Clooney swap, which is because George Clooney is in the movie Return to Horror High. This is like early, this is like pre-Roseanne Clooney. Yeah, I believe this is pre-Return of the Killer Tomatoes Clooney. Oh yeah. It was big in Return movies at the time.

But I got two George Clooney movies in exchange. Okay, so we already watched Oh Brother Where Art Thou I'm not gonna probably make her watch like Michael Clayton Michael Clayton, Michael Clayton, sit down kids We're watching Michael Clayton. Yeah, I gotta think of the next one. I'll probably end up watching fucking leatherheads or something. But anyway I she knows I won't let go for it. She knows I won't go for it. So she makes Teresa do it. Okay.

So Teresa has watched, I think, all of the Hellraiser movies. Okay, well there's like 12 or 13 of those, right? Several reboots. And not only that, some of them made Teresa cry. Oh boy. I have not seen a hell raiser. I do like horror and I do like, you know,

crazy or gory or whore sometimes, and I've not seen a hell raiser. Like Teresa is the member of my family most committed to supporting our child's specific autisms by not saying that she can't do things that aren't actually going to be a problem just because they're different from what we would like. And so, Teresa is the one who wants to support her by watching it with her so that they can process it together.

Okay. Does Teresa like actively watch it or she's like, I'll read a magazine or be on my phone or something. When something gross is happening, Teresa looks away and Grace tells her what's happening. Okay, that's a nice compromise. It is, but it leaves Teresa a couple of times. I think Hellraiser one- Sometimes that's scarier.

What's in the mind is- One of the Hellraisers, I remember Teresa telling me that she was physically shaking. Yeah. Because Teresa is very delicate flower. Much like me, I would hate it. Like I would not want to be there, but I think I could handle it. Teresa can't handle it, but she's making herself be there.

So I think Teresa and Grace watched Terrifier 1 and 2. So yeah, so these are like the murder clown movies that have become very popular recently just because of their insane kind of over-the-top practical gore. Yeah, these are like movies that they made for $5 million that have made $700 million or whatever. Yeah, I think the thing, you know, it started out as a, you know, direct to to be thing or something. And now it's to the point where like it beat the second Joker movie at the box office.

Yes. And in a battle of the nightmare clowns. Sure. Yeah. And Grace wants to see Terrifier 3, the latest of the terrifiers. And God bless her, my wife said she was willing to watch it, but only on streaming. But Grace couldn't handle that shit. She needs to see it on the theater.

Got to see it on the big screen. Yes, got to see it on the big screen. As the filmmakers intended. She's a regular Martin Scorsese. Right. So who was it? Francis Ford Coppola? Who wants us to see things only on the big screen. As the filmmakers intended. She's a regular Martin Scorsese. Right. So who was it? Francis Ford Coppola? Who wants us to see things only on the big screen?

Probably both those guys, but I think Scorsese, I mean known for film preservation too. Yeah. He's a good guy. This place is very funny, wears those big eyeglasses. Yeah. Yeah. So one time I saw Joe- Likes to be in his granddaughter's TikToks.

Yeah. That sounds great. I was asked if I would be interested in watching Terrifier 3. Is the idea that easier to look away, easier to busy yourself when something else, when the fucked up shit's happening- I think so. But in the theater, it's- It's too immersive.

Sure. It's too much. Both of Grace's babysitters were asked if they would be willing to see the film. They both said, absolutely not. They both gave a hard no. These are... So I've seen one of these.

I've seen the first, Terrifier. I think a fan favorite guest, Sarah Morgan and I kind of watched it on Zoom, because we had heard about it. So I think we like, we co-watched that. Yeah, really fucked up. I have a pretty high tolerance for that sort of thing. But I was like, huh, well maybe, perhaps I'm approved now.

Perhaps. So, it's funny you should mention that. When I found out that Teresa wouldn't go see it, that neither of the two babysitters would go see it, the first thought I had was, man, I wish Sarah Morgan lived in Los Angeles. Oh, yeah, sure. Because she would go see it with Grace. But I thought, I'm not going to say anything to Grace or Teresa, but I was in the kitchen, I was hearing this conversation, I had heard all this context, I said, I'm going to text Elliot Kalin, Benjamin Harrison,

and Jordan Morris. And I try and phrase this- Three Musketeers. Try and phrase this in a way that they understand. I think I believe I wrote that my expectation was that the answer would be no. I said, if any of you like horror movies or grace enough to go to the Terrifier 3 with her, please let me know. And only one of these men, close beloved friends of mine, only one of these men stood up and said, I believe in America's future. That was Mr. Jordan Morris.

And later this week, Mr. Jordan Morris and young Grace Thorne will be probably going to Alhambra, I'm going to guess. Seems like the means usually ends up being Alhambra, I'm going to guess. Okay. It seems like the means usually ends up being Alhambra. Okay. I'm going to Alhambra. Maybe you could go to the Americana if you want to, but I think Alhambra is pretty easy. I was going to suggest the University Theater in Pasadena. Oh, if it's running there, that sounds like a great idea.

Yeah, great theater, five bucks, noticeable tear in the screen, filthy carpet. That's what I love. Yeah, yeah. That's a good place to see terrifying. If Grace isn't too concerned with presentation quality. Her only concerns are, does she have her noise-canceling headphones so it's not too loud? She doesn't mind the spurting blood, it's not too loud. And she likes to sit on an aisle. That's, yeah. You know, just in case.

Other than that. Other than that. Anyway. But yeah, I'm excited. I, yeah, the, I've seen the first one. I don't, I probably won't watch the second one. Maybe I'll read a little bit. You should probably watch the second one.

Oh, God. Okay. Yeah. I sort of expected, I sort of thought that was sort of taken as read in the text messages that I sent. Sure. Okay. Yeah, okay. I'll watch the second one. You would watch the second one. But yeah, I hear the fucked up one in this one

that's making people leave is, and spoilers alerts, for Terrifier 3. I hear the thing that's making people throw up and leave is chainsaw at the butt. Oh, right in the old butthole, huh? I don't know, Just what I've heard. Is it with or against the slot? Uh, well, I mean, this clown, Jesse, this guy's pretty twisted.

Wait, hold on. So he's going against the slot. Can I ask you a quick question? This clown from the movie, Terrifier, is this guy twisted? You know how clowns are usually funny and you see them and you laugh? Right. It's like with a Bala Seltzer... Jesse!

...getting into a... Jesse! No! ...voting on bills in Congress. Well, hold on. Let's not get satirical. Yeah, this is a... So the first Terrifier movie, when I watched it on Zoom with Sarah, I was like, okay, the

score is really, really fucked up. This isn't particularly scary, but what I like is that the spooky clown, which, you know, he's like hack at this point, right? He's spooky clown. He does clown stuff. He does, like, he does silent business to try and make people laugh before he kills them and I'm like, you know what?

Fuck Pennywise doesn't do little bits wait to try and make people laugh Yeah, he does like little clown bits and I'm like you ever get a does he ever get a little chuckle from somebody? Uh tied up with razor wire. Sure. Yeah No, I mean, I think so I think he does like try and do actual clown stuff and I'm like I appreciate this You like make a dick out of balloons? No, it's not even like he's doing a fucked up twisted thing. He'll just do some like clown business. Okay.

Yeah, pull scarves. Do you think they got a real clown to play this clown? I do, you know, and I think. What about maybe, can I suggest somebody? What about my Comedia del Arte teacher, Jeff Rez? Sure, yeah, yeah. Or a Patty Gallagher from UC Santa Cruz who taught my clowning class. I don't think the guy playing this clown whose name I believe is Art the Clown. That's his given name? I think

that's the character he's playing. Okay. It'd be a fun coincidence. If you were casting. The one finds the wizard. If you're going through 8x10s. You're like, well. Nicholas Braun? No. Sorry, Patty Gallagher. Tom Hardy?

No. But yeah, I appreciated that about it. That's really nice. So there's a little actual clowning in there. That's really great. So yeah, I'm excited. Yeah, I don't know how I'll react to Chainsaw up the butt or the rest of the film, but I think we'll have a fun time.

Well, you know, our guest on this week's program, Jordan, is a podcaster, which in many ways is the evil clown of the 21st century. Yes You know podcasters are usually funny Well, this guy is too This guy's totally twisted. The thing about this guy is that this guy is so fucking twisted So twist this guy is this guy like you think he's going one way But he gives it a little twist. You never know.

You never know. Yeah. Anyway. So psych us out, like how Jared Leto, like, psyched out his co-stars. He mailed us cum. We booked him maybe two weeks ago. He mailed cum to us. Yeah, so I'm like, who's this guy?

You know? Yeah, I opened up the envelope and I saw the come there that he had mailed us. I said to myself, who's this guy? Who's this guy? Who's this guy? This guy's kind of twisted. From the podcast We Got This, Hal Lublin. Hi, Hal.

Hi. I'm so glad you got the care packages. First of all, I think that's fantastic because you never know when you mail people cum, a wet envelope doesn't always go through at the post office, but when you tell them it's cum, then it's only 35 cents. They charge you less. Can I ask you a question? Yeah. Did you ask... There's a special... Yeah, there's like a postcard stamp, right? It's a cum stamp. It's a cum stamp, yeah. It's a cum stamp, right? It's a cum stamp.

It's a cum stamp, yeah. Did you ask my parents for exactly what I got in the pear packages? Did you ask my parents for exactly what I got in the care packages when I was at St. Dorothy's Rest Summer Camp when I was a kid? I do a little research before I send a gift because I don't want you to have to return it. Hello, nostalgia alert. All the fields.

Who can forget those baskets of cum you'd get in town? Yeah, you get homesick. This will get me through. We would go to the commissary, we would spend 25 cents, we would get three red vines, we'd bite the ends off and then use them to slurp cum. Sure. Oh boy. Now who's the twisted cloud? Slurpurp cum. Sure. Now who's the twisted cloud? Anyway, it's great to see you, Hal.

Oh, it's great to see you too. I haven't been in this building since February of 2020. It's the first time I've been back here. Wow. This is a pleasure. Welcome. It's been here waiting for you. Thank goodness. We put in new cladding on some of the walls. Yeah, I noticed it's really three of them are really nice. Yeah, isn't that great? Yeah. The other one is the familiar egg carton material. The other one is mixed.

Yeah. Well, you know, the blood stains weren't on all of it, you know, so we just sort of tried to... How's it going with you, buddy? It's going well. I'm doing all right. I was listening to the October 24th episode where you were talking about Archie. Great episode.

Yeah, great episode. And you mentioned in the subreddit that people were most interested not in what you've written for Archie, but Old Digest. Yeah, I should say I went into rslasharchie, which is a really great subreddit, a nice wholesome subreddit akin to r slash marbles. Sure. You know, kind of trying to like hype people up for some Archie stuff I had done. And they're not super interested in new Archie stuff that's coming out.

It's a lot of like digest collectors. Yes. And that's where like the spicy convos happen. Sure. Can I ask you guys a question? Yes. And that's where like the spicy convos happen. Sure, sure. Can I ask you guys a question? What is the, I don't understand, like the digest is like the little one. Is that different from a regular, are there not, is that compilations of regular size Archies?

Yeah, I think how it works, I'm no expert in this but this is how my my understanding of this is that like, you know, you can get a monthly Archie comic or you could for a long time you get a month, you know Just a floppy comic and you know probably cost 25 cents back in the day or whatever Just a classic rack at the convenience store 20 bucks or 20 pages Yeah, 20 bucks is too sorry, 20 pages. Okay. Yeah, 20 bucks is too much. 20 pages, you know, yeah, a quarter or whatever. And then the Digest is the chonkier little guy that collects, you know, like 20 stories

or 25 stories. And you get that at the supermarket checkout. That's what I was about to say. That's a supermarket classic. Yes. That's where we would get them. My mother, who loved Arch Archie passed that on to me Mm-hmm, so we would get digest together if we ever went shopping. What happens in Archie?

You know, I've read Jordan's version of Archie, which is frankly a little twisted Yeah, it's a little bit you know these characters in Riverdale slurping milkshakes and having barn dances. No, no. No. Hot dogs mailing is come out to people. Yes. On postcards. Hot dog the dog.

It's mailing come. A lot of trust there. Honestly, the ones that I read, which are from 70s through maybe the early first couple years of the 90s, practically nothing was happening. It's just the normal Archie's in love with Veronica, Betty's in love with Archie. They're not funny, right? I mean, they're not really supposed to be funny. It's more like a dramatic narrative, like a lighthearted dramatic narrative.

No, it's supposed to be funny. I think they are gag-based. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's a lot of like, there's a, what's supposed to be a visual, it's sort of like you see what they're trying to do. And I don't know that I've ever laughed out loud, even as a small child, anything from an Archie,

but there's something very comforting about it. It's just vanilla pudding in a book. And there's, and they do like periodically, if you read read old Archie comics, which when I was doing mine, it was really fun to just go to a used bookstore, go to a stall at a flea market. There's usually a stack of old Archie comics that you can get for a buck. Flipping through them, it was fun to see them kind of take sweaty stabs at trends. Like you would get one from 1984 or whatever and it's like, Jughead's addicted to video games! He can't stop playing these video games! He's playing Spacey Invaders! And then like change the name a little bit. That stuff is really delightful,

especially when you go back and get like the old ones spacey invaders a very dark game by the way But yeah the the thing that made me think of was I was recently out in Ojai and They were having a street fair and at their library. They were doing a book sales libraries will do Love a library book sale. And it was great. Don't need any books. No.

I'm a public radio host. They send them to me. I do not want them. Sure. But I love a library book sale. You got to go look. Go buy a Lego book for a quarter. And the smell of the books alone is great.

So I go over to the comics table. Everything's a dollar, 25 cents, whatever it is. I immediately pick up, I start leafing through all of the Archie Digests that are there. Not only did I buy three or four of them, but there were three or four there that I already had. And not having read them in forever, but having brought them from Philadelphia to here and they're on my bookshelf, I recognized, oh, I know this cover. I know this Veronica and Betty double digest.

Already got it. Not going to buy the double like I did with Constantine on DVD DVD which I bought three times. Forgot I had it each time. The Keanu Reeves Constantine. The Keanu Reeves Constantine I would go to Best Buy on Tuesdays when the DVDs and the new titles came out and I would look at it and go I enjoyed Constantine I should I should get that and I bring it home and go to put it away next to an identical copy of Constantine and after return I don't even know if I did. I think I still have two of them is the point that I'm trying to make.

Next time you have to do like a Yankee swap, holidays are coming up. That's true. Somebody's getting a Constantine. I'm going to hide it like the Afikomen at a Seder. I'm just going to let the children look for it. And there's no money, but you will have to watch Constantine and have an opinion about it. Yeah. Speaking of hiding something delightful, y'all, I was iced earlier this weekend.

Wait, like Smirnoff iced? Y'all remember bros icing bros? Yes, like Smirnoff iced. Stephen, would you look up when this trend, like, when did this trend come into the national consciousness? This is, I would guess, because, okay, I've been iced many times before. What is your lifestyle? Oh, you used to work at an action sports television network. Yes, okay.

So, at the height of bros, I sing bros, I guess we should say that the thing is you have to hide a warm, it has to be warm, a warm Smirnoff ice and you have to trick your buddy into looking at it. And if, it's like the thing where you make the little okay sign and you try and then you get to punch somebody in the arm, it's like that. So you trick your buddy punch somebody in the arm. It's like that. So you trick your buddy into looking at the ice. And if they see it, they have to take a knee and then chug the ice in one go. So when I worked at Fuel TV, the action sports network-

I mean, it's good that they incorporate protesting institutionalized racism. Yeah, exactly. We were doing it to bring awareness to the plight of the Smirnoff people. One day Colin Kaepernick was getting iced by one of his bros. And he thought, you know, what if I gave this a deeper meaning? What if I took this to the next level? Steven, I'm going to guess like 2010? Perfect.

Oh, wow. Okay. Wow. The New York Times in June 2010 is the nation's biggest viral drinking game, though there has been some doubt several citations listed over whether this is an organic phenomenon or a marketing stunt by Smirnoff for which the company has denied. The company has denied. The company has denied.

So they sat around at a table and decided like, how can we get a bunch of people to take a knee and drink a warm, surely not enjoyable version of our beverage? So tired of these Smirnoff SJWs. That's what he asked us for. Smirnoff SJWs. That's what the S is for. Smirnoff Justice Warrior. Yes. Yeah, we hate, first of all, A-Cab everybody, A-Cab, A-Cab, A-Cab. Second of all, how do we get people to drink our stuff warm?

Second of all, ABV, ABV, ABV. Sure. So, I was doing a bit on the Good Mythical Morning with our buddies Rhett and Link. They do a ticketed late night show once a year. That's a little twisted. This is the one where you were dressed up in a bread suit? I was dressed up in a bread suit, yeah, for this. A suit made of bread or dressed as if you were a loaf of bread? Good question. It was a like jumpsuit, a kind of a thick canvas jumpsuit with like rubber prop bread

glued to it. Yeah, they wouldn't use real bread for this. No. Sure. Yeah. I mean. That's how you get rats. Yeah.

Or killed by birds. Yeah. And they laid me down in a park and ducks killed me that's gonna get expensive a tuppence of bag yeah that's up yeah doesn't seem like much tuppence in this economy yeah okay so you're in this canvas bread so this is before this is just hanging around waiting for everything to happen. We should explain, Rhett and Link from Good Mythical Morning are nasty freaks and they love this kind of shit.

They love this kind of shit. No, their typical YouTube show, kind of PG-13, once a year, the gloves come off. The PG-13 gloves and a different set of gloves go on. Nasty gloves. Uh-huh. But, you know, kind of the tradition of this thing is like they, you know, you can drink on camera but also like, hey, there's a little bar set up backstage and we all kind of hang around. And one of the producers comes up to me and she's like, oh, Jordan, I'm going to use this

table to like set up the alcohol. And she's like kind of has a shopping bag to set in up these bottles. And then just slides the Smirnoff ice over to me. And I'm like, I've just been iced. And the nostalgia, it was like finding that pile of Archies at the book sale, a warm, it's like hearing the Peanuts Christmas music. It's just like, it's like hearing the Peanuts Christmas music. It's just like it sent me and there was an element too of like, I'm an occasional drop

in there at that organization. And I do feel like, oh, I'm just this guy who pops in and I'm not really part of the crew. I felt like I was part of the crew in that moment. Oh, that's really beautiful because they were trying to fuck up your life. Yeah, and then I felt too drunk and it was gross and I was uncomfortable for the rest of the night. I mean, how do you get to it?

In a really wonderful way. Is the regret like three, because you're supposed to drink it right away, is that correct? You are, yeah. And there's no, like you're chugging it. No, is that correct? You are, yeah. And there's no... Like you're chugging it. No, I've been iced before. I know how to do it. And it all came back.

It was like riding a bike. How much alcohol... What, drinking? Just drinking? Remember? On the subject of ABV, as a non-drinker, how much alcohol is in a Smirnoff ice relative to an equivalent bottle of beer? I think it's just like drinking a beer. I think it's just like drinking a beer.

I think it's just like chugging a Miller Lite real fast. And I was like- With a fresher flavor. Yeah. And when that happened, I was like, oh yeah. And you are a little bit drunk immediately and it's gross. I'm like, wow, there was like a year where I would do this twice a week at work in an office.

Just having fucking guys. Guys named Travis doing this to me constantly. Trevor Burrus With frosted tips. Is that big in 2010s? Is that still happening then? Aaron Ross I think we were still frosted. Yeah, it was maybe on the way out. An older Travis probably would have.

Yeah. Anyway. Trevor Burrus He never let it go. He was still frosted with tips 10 years later. He never let it go. No. He was still frosted to the tips 10 years later. So it was nice. It was, you know, it led to some discomfort later on. But honestly, I couldn't have been more thrilled to be iced.

What kind of flavor is in a Smirnoff ice? Is that a lemon lime? Yeah, it's kind of like a Sprite. And I think that's, you know, that was the kind of the danger of them is I think they were a, you know, like gateway to get a kid to drink. So, you know, they probably shouldn't be sold. Are you going to bring some for Grace? Oh yeah.

We're going to sneak some smear knobs into Terrifier. We're going to have a good old time. You'll put it in the aisle seat, then she'll be iced. Yeah. Oh, great. Yeah. Are your kids cool? Do they know the rules?

That if your bro hands you an ice, you've gotta chug it. And if not, you gotta go in the pussy hole. Pussy hole. I mean, Grace knows that if I make that okay sign below the waist and she looks, it's okay for me to punch her. Sock her in the shoulder. Hal, can I ask you a question? Sure. This bookshelf with these trans continental Archies that you've got. Yeah. What else is going on on this bookshelf? What else have

you drug around that much? Boy, that's the, there's a sugar and spike in there. Do we know sugar and spike? I don't. That is, I believe a DC comic. There were two babies, toddler babies who could speak to each other in regular language, whether they tried to speak to adults, it just came out as... Sounds funny. Like a Goo Goo Gaga kind of thing. Yeah. So you'd see like the world, it was a proto-rugrats.

It was pre, well before rugrats. But this was a children's entertainment for children? Yes, it was a children's entertainment for children. Got it. Enjoyed that. Enjoyed that a great deal. There's probably some Richie Rich in there. Oh, Richie Rich.

Have you like priced any of these or slabbed these up or is that not something you're interested in? I think they have no value. Well, the Archies have no value because I would read them in the bathtub as a kid. So they're all wavy from having at least been exposed to steam. Some say that makes them more valuable. That's true. They're a little twisted from the water in them.

And yeah, that could make them more valuable. That's true. I do have, this I'm sure has no value. The first comic book show I ever went to, I was 13 years old, and I had nothing for people to sign. I didn't know that's what you did. So I had the paper bags that you would get at a comic shop. So I just got people to sign that, including Dan DiCarlo, which was a big deal for me because that was a big Archie guy.

Cool. Oh, that was one of the big Archie guys. And he drew an Archie. Who were the big Archie guys? It was Dan DiCarlo, Steve Bannon, right? Steve Bannon, uh-huh. Yvette DiCarlo. This is his mother.

Yeah. Art the Clown. Art the Clown was in there? Sure. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like the Archie, those old Archie comics are something I noticed when I was like kind of boning up on the ones I would just grab at a flea market of like some, they don't always have like the creative team on them. That is like a relatively new thing in comics is

Crediting who wrote them right and drew them. Well, I mean kids do you don't want to tell kids that it's fiction. That's true Yeah, they think they're a ruin. It's like fucking telling them about Santa Claus Yeah, you're right. By the way, if you're a child and you're listening to this Santa Claus is real. Mm-hmm. Also You know, what do you what did I get you to listen to this with Jordan or something? Why are you listening to this, child? They heard Santa Claus was going to be on. Okay, yeah, well. Still waiting.

You know, I've been mistaken for Santa Claus a few times recently. Because of the beard? You're wearing this attractive beard. Yeah, a few. That is, you know, something I'm constantly dealing with is people telling me who they think I look like. Mm-hmm and It really is a huge part of your life. It is as though I think central to it Mmm is that for some reason people have never seen another curly haired person curly haired person. Sure, yeah.

There's a little bit of that going on. I think that's really at the heart of it. They're just like, I can think of a second curly haired person, they say. I better tell this one that I thought of it. Do you know each other? Are you in the club? Yeah. And I'm sure you've picked up on this.

I'm being kind of thin skinned about it. I'll admit it. I like fixate on it too much. I should just tell the people no, I'm not Zach Alvin Ackers. Fucking get on with my day and not be mad about it and talk about it on a podcast later. It's fine. But I get I people have been saying that I have looked Santa Claus ish with the beard. Hmm. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I can see how a beard would make people that again, it's weird. You look more Santa Claus ish than previously and that Santa Claus famously has a beard in those depictions I have one other Santa. I one Santa element

But when you're wearing that red hat right now, that's true. Well, it's cold Those big patent leather boots True sort of floppy at the top boots. And to say nothing of the sack that I'm carrying. Sure, yeah. All those toys. I just always think, previously before you grew the beard, I thought the boots were more of like a d'Artagnan kind of thing.

Sure. No, Santa. Okay. The context immediately shifted, didn't it? Yeah. Now I understand why this is happening, because I dress and look like Santa. When you were icing. I thought Captain Morgan Oh, yeah felt like to me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a really good boot example. Thank you Steven

You got any favorite boot guys? What's the what's the guy on home improvement Al Borland? Yeah. Yeah. I always thought you were Al Borland Oh, man, I would love to be I would love to be confused for Al Borland. Richard Karn. Do you think if you looked enough like Richard Karn, they'd let you host the family feud a little bit? Yeah, just for a couple of years. Like when Steve Harvey's on vacation or whatever.

A forgettable student. You're like, oh, Karn's back. Yeah. I'm the guy between Louis Anderson and Steve Harvey. They call me the bridge. Yeah. Karn's a real bridge. He's a real bridge guy. You know what, Jordan? If you can be Karn, I can be the guy that played Jay Peterman. Yes, you can. Which Family Feud host would you like to be? And this is the second time we've talked about this in two episodes. I don't think we've said who we want to be.

We've just run through family feud. I have a friend who worked with Louis Anderson and when he was doing that, God rest his, you know. Yes, RIP. Yeah, Lea Sholem. I would call him and leave him messages as Louis Anderson. So I think I would have to say that. Yeah.

Do you do a Louie Anderson? Yeah, what's an example? I would call him and say, hey, it's Louie. I had some notes on the script. That's pretty good. Give me a call back. Well, I wound up doing a reading of the script at Louie Anderson's house. And the thing that I remember outside of it was a very nice neighborhood.

Somewhere in a posh area was there was a full motorcycle just sitting in the living room. Really? Like on display. I don't think anybody was getting on it riding around, but maybe they were. I don't know. I just have never seen a motorcycle in a home as if it were a showroom before. I went to Adam Carolla's house once. Boom.

Look, I'm not here to brag, but I visited that famous asshole's house once. Oh. Look, I'm not here to brag. Wow. But I visited that famous asshole's house. He was a- Who had maybe not gone full- Yeah, he was not nearly. He was not nearly. My livelihood was under threat by a patent troll. Greg Proops was there also.

He's very nice. Drag Proops. I don't know about that. Nothing bad to say about Greg Proops. Very nice, very funny man. Greg proofs was there also. He's very nice drag proofs Very nice very funny man, but Adam Carolla's house Which was I think he's sold this house to someone else famous. I feel like but It was impressively tasteful. Hmm in almost all ways. A beautiful Spanish style mansion, very classic Southern California house that I think he had personally overseen the renovations of and a lot of nice historical detail that he was very

proud to show us while not meeting our gaze, one of his signature moves. I would say the main element that was not that was just right in the middle of it was a fucking car. There is a car inside the house somehow. They had built it into the house. I don't know how. I don't know how this car got in there. You couldn't drive it in and out.

Like what if it somewhat accidentally drives it? You're fucked. You're so fucked. You're fucked if someone accidentally drives like a kid drives it. Oh my God. You're so fucked. You're fucked. So what accidentally drives like a kid drives it Oh my god, you're so walk into the kitchen. You think you're getting a glass of milk from the fridge Everything's gonna fall apart. You're gonna have to go hard, right? Yeah Also, it's constantly running so there's a carbon monoxide Like JK relics black mold

Oh, okay, sure. It's just like JK Rowling's black mold. Yeah, that's right. Okay, I see, I see. All right. What kind of car was it? Do you remember? It was like an exotic car. It was like a... And I think there was also a motorcycle. I think it was a car and a motorcycle. Oh, he found out what Louis Anderson was doing. He said, well, fuck that, I'll add a car.

In the early days of podcasting, Jordan and I went a couple times on the Corolla show that he recorded at his like compound in Burbank or something that was like a big warehouse full of cars that he had also put some studios in just again this is before he was this was when occasionally you'd be like uh it's not when you were like uh right right but uh it was like he had put some studios into his car warehouse that he owned From his love line money, I guess I don't radio. I don't syndicated radios probably. Yeah, probably pays well But yeah at his house. It was like glassed in it was like near the foyer but like not Attached to the garage like they must have put it in with a crane and it was like a Ferrari or something. You know it was like a multi hundred thousand dollar car and like a sport motorcycle I think. That's that's my memory of it. It was a

long time ago. And glassed in in that no one could access it. Yeah and he also very impressively had made a bar that had porthole windows that looked into the swimming pool which was kind of cool, honestly. That is pretty fancy. Yeah, it was pretty neat because it was like down the grade. So it was like the house, then the swimming pool, then because it was on the side of a hill, they could put this bar room that was below grade.

So it looked, so it had portholes into the swimming pool. It was pretty neat. Yeah, I like that. Anyway, he's a real dick, but... Yeah, I mean, sure. But yeah, it was very very tasteful house I was really surprised. There's a movie Steven look up Jason Schwartzman giant dick movie because there's a movie. I don't remember the name. Oh, Rushmore. No, no

Yeah, which is this is the overnight. No overnight. Yes. Thank you. So they shot that famous prosthetic dick I was like this looks like Adam Carolla's house and then and then like one time I interviewed Jason Schwartz The overnight. Yes, thank you. The overnight. So they shot that at that house. Famous prosthetic dick. I was like, this looks like Adam Carolla's house. And then one time I interviewed Jason Schwartzman in Austin, Texas for Bullseye. And I was off air. I was like, hey, Jason Schwartzman, can I ask you a question? You know that movie, I remembered that it was called The Overnight at the time. I'd seen it more recently.

I was like, was that Adam Carolla's house? And he's like, yeah, it was Adam Carolla's house. And I've always heard this about interviewing Jason Schwartzman. How many times did he ice you during the interview? All I can say is this, he's my bro. Yeah, well, hey, you gotta take a knee. Okay, let's take a break. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jesse Goh.

It's Jordan Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorn, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy, detective. Every episode of Jordan Jesse Goh is of course supported by the members of Maximum Fun, at least those members of Maximum Fun who listen to Jordan Jesse Goh. The reason being that when you support Maximum Fun, your support directly supports the shows

that you listen to like Jordan Jesse Goh. So thank you to all the members of Maximum Fun who have been, by the way, I have been hearing a lot of positive feedback about Gracie's Game Gauntlet lately. Oh, yeah. Yeah, this series, a lot of fun to do. Well, we played games that weren't a lot of fun to play.

Yeah, they were pretty miserable. Yeah, terrible video games, fun to chat about, Gracie's Game Gauntlet. Yeah, the final episode, Dragon's Lair NES is up. Not the Don Bluth animated Dragon's Lair you saw in arcades, which was also unfun to play. But the NES version, which is unfun to play in a very different way. Yeah, a more complicated, long, baffling, unimpressive way.

Exactly. Exactly. So yeah, Grace's Game Gauntlet, maximumfun.org slash join. And Jordan, we have a brand new t-shirt in the Max Fun Store. Yeah, maxfunstore.com. You can get our new Actua t-shirt and coffee mug. Now Jordan, people might not remember this moment in Jordan Jesse Goh, although it is already iconic. Sure. So why don't we do a little doodle-le-loop, doodle-le-loop, doodle-le-loop.

Yes, Wayne and Garth style, doodle-le-loop. Doodle-le-loop, doodle-le-loop, doodle-le-loop. I have something, I had a big moment over the weekend that I wanted to share with y'all. I actually got to fulfill a childhood dream. What's that? So I attended a Comic Con in Berkeley. This is a convocation of comic book enthusiasts. The funny books. The funny books, yeah. So Little Loot Loot.

I was in the comic book club. I was in the comic book club. I was in the comic book club. I was in the comic book club. I was in the comic book club. I was in the con in Berkeley. This is a convocation of comic book enthusiasts. The funny books. Funny books, yeah. So, Little Lulu, Dagwood and Blondie. What's Kathy up to these days? Oh, so much.

She'll spit on that thing. That's my update. Hasn't made it into Sunday Funnies. Actua. Act on that thing. Oh, Actua is an ironic tattoo getting done right now with somebody. That would just make no sense in a year. She's always got like the sweat marks coming off her. Yeah.

Oh, she's sweat on that thing. Yeah, I gotta get more tattoos around it so it blends in. The irony just has to blanket my body. Sure, yeah. It has to cover up the I like turtles kid. I think it legitimately, Jordan, one of the best things you've ever said, and you've said a lot of wonderful things on Jordan Jesse Goh. Listen, there's no point in ranking amazing things I say.

It would take too long. People would be fighting. And the people need the time for going to maxfunstore.com and buying this amazing t-shirt that features a stunning likeness of you and me, Jordan, as characters from Kathy. Yes, really amazing. And we're stoked on the shirt.

It's one of the cooler things we've had merch-wise. So maxfunstore.com, you can get it on a shirt. You can're stoked on the shirt. It's one of the cooler things we've had merch-wise. So maxfunstore.com. You can get it on a shirt. You can get it on a mug. You can get a bunch of other cool Jordan, Jesse, Go things there. A perfect, perfect gift for that JJ Go freak in your family. That's probably you. That's you.

Because let's face it, you don't share this with anyone else. This is something you listen to alone in a kind of a state of shame. Yeah. And hey, you know what else chickens don't do? What's that? They don't miss me at the Berkeley Public Library Comic Con on November 9th. This freaking Comic Con sounds so awesome. It's going to be great.

It's at the Berkeley Public Library. I'm going to be doing a panel at 11 a.m. and then signing some books. Insane lineup on this thing. Go to berkeleypubliclibrary.org for more information. I hope to see folks there. It's a really, really cool lineup of comics, folks. And yeah, I'm sorry. If there's a Comic Con at a public library and the audience isn't half Jordan Jesse Goh

listeners, I'm going to be bummed. Can I tell you this, Jordan? Yeah. If you go to the Berkeley Public Library Comic Con to see Jordan, I'm going to be bummed. Can I tell you this, Jordan? Yeah. If you go to the Berkeley Public Library Comic-Con to see Jordan, I'm going to lay you even money. You're going to see one of the souls of Mischief. Maybe. There's a few of them. There's a few souls of Mischief.

I can't tell you. Is it going to be O.P.O.? I can't tell you which souls of Mischief member it's going to be. And at the end of the day, it's possible. It's casual or pep love and not one of the souls of Mischief member it's going to be. And at the end of the day, it's possible. It's casual or pep love and not one of the souls of Mischief. You got to come to the Berkeley Public Library Comic-Con to find out. Yeah, absolutely.

And hey, if you're looking for a holiday gift that is not Jordan Jesse Goh themed, well, check out the Put This On shop. That's my internet store. We are bringing back, we just made some spectacular scarves from antique Japanese silk we've got some brand new baseball caps and lots of other bullshit including radical dudes cards okay you beautiful things and also radical dudes cards radical dudes trading cards at putthisonshop.com. Let's get back to the show. It's Jordan Jesse Goh.

I'm Jesse Thorne, America's Radio Sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective. And Hal Lublin, mailer of leavings. I feel awful I Feel awful how that? Our audience isn't going to get to share in the segment that we did not record in between segments Mmm, which was called cheesesteak reminiscences. Oh, yeah I always I always you know it's just in case you you know, we say things, you know, I always hit

stop, you know? Sure. I do like to say what I really think between segments. Talking about some Philly steaks we ate. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. They sounded really good. I enjoyed listening to the sandwich recollections.

You ever had a fucking Philly cheese steak? Yeah, they're great. They deliver. Yeah? What is your preferred, as a Philadelphian, Hal, or at least a former Philadelphian. Sure. Oh, once there, always there. Now and forever a Philadelphian.

Yeah, sure. Yeah, you never lose your Eagles t-shirts and whatever. Correct. Cacaw! Cacaw, yeah. We all say to each other, if I see the, cacaw! One time in the airport after the Eagles had won the Super Bowl, I was wearing a t-shirt and hat, Super Bowl champions, because who knows if that'll ever happen again.

And Randall Cunningham saw you and said, cacaw! He came up to me and said, cacaw! A guy walks up to me, gets maybe a foot away from my face, stares me in the eyes, and starts singing the Eagles fight song, which I sing with him. Wow. And then goes, all right. And then we turned around, never saw him again in my life.

He might've been an angel. Well, in Philadelphia, you're legally married to that guy. That's true. I'm going to go tell Jennifer after this. I think she needs to know. She deserves to know. Sure. That secret, secret Philly family.

Yeah. That guy you met at the airport. Yes. What's your preferred cheesesteak presentation? What items are present and in what manner? I'm very bare bones. I like whiz without, I don't like onions on it. Oh, so it's just steak, whiz and bread.

Yes. I'm a notorious lover of tan foods and that's sort of like the Holy Trinity. They're all together. Oh, yeah. Tan three ways. Yeah. notorious lover of tan foods and that's sort of like the Holy Trinity where they are all together. Oh yeah. Tan three ways. Yeah. It's like a tan mom is what I call it.

I say, can I get a tan mom please and they serve that up. But it's, you can get so many great things. You can get a pizza steak with a little marinara on there. You can get peppers, onions. You have so many different choices. That's sort of the beauty. It's like such a simple sandwich and then you can add a bunch of stuff to it It's still incredibly simple, but you get the flavor profile you want that makes it a good

I think it's a good sort of custom cluster for dessert. It's a little gag get a goo goo cluster. Come on What's a goo goo? That's a Philadelphia thing. I know about that's Nashville. Oh, what am I? Oh boy? What's there's a Philadelphia one of those little Debbie snack Goldberg's peanut shoes tasty cakes tasty cake Okay, drag me in the comments, please John Worcester listens to the show and Philly boy Roy's drafting a response Do your worst regional food weirdos? Listen to me, goo goo cluster.

It's fucking moron over here. It's very good. The goo goo cluster is great. Tasty cakes also great. They're really great. At the beginning of the pandemic, I reached out to Tasty Cake on Twitter. I said, I really miss home. And they, I was still verified at the time because that was when you didn't pay for it.

And I think that worked for me. They sent me a crate of tasty cakes. Too many. Like, we couldn't have eaten all of them. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Just enough to build, like, a throne. If you had even tried to pass them out, you would have been giving other people COVID-19.

That's right. Well, I put that. At the time. At the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I was injecting everything with COVID-19. Just my stuff. And come. Just from your personal the time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I was injecting everything with COVID-19 And some your personal monkey supply You know, I had a little covid remember that wet market I had in my living room sure that's you know, that's why I stored it Honestly, top crews from cocktails filling stuff with cum and covid Let me put it this way how any market in your living room is a wet market. There you go.

That's right. Because of the cum? Yeah, you're glazing it. Okay, that's true. Yep. I don't know, I guess that's what this show is. Talk about Richard Garner a little bit. Sure.

List family feud hosts. And tons of just come talk. And tons of come talk. No. Sorry, I'm sending a text message. OK, Jesse actually has his phone out. No, thank you. No, would ruin our credit.

It was Joe Biden. He was wondering if he wanted the Presidential Medal of Freedom. Oh, yeah, I'm good. Yeah, but I told him it would wanted the presidential medal of freedom. Oh, yeah, I'm good. Yeah, but I told him it would, we're sort of underground. Sure, yeah. You told him I said hi? I think. I did not tell him that.

Oh, that's a bummer. In fact, I told him that you said to go fuck himself. I mean, I did? You said, fuck you, old man. I did. We can't make the ceremony because this month we're Smirnoff's bros of the month. We're going to the Smirnoff factory. Yeah. And we're Smyrnaf's bros of the month. We're going to the Smyrnaf factory. Yeah.

And we're ice- In Panama Beach. In Panama Beach. Sure. And we're icing each other till the sun comes up over the Panama shores. Panama, anyway. Hal, what's the best Philadelphia thing? Because we were also talking about when I was in Philadelphia recently with John Hodgman, I went and had a Pennsylvania Dutch breakfast, which I come from Pennsylvania

Dutch stock. Oh. But it's like just one, like my grandmother never made anything for me. My mom talks about the things that her mother made for her. Right. But I went and ate a just, I just absolutely fucking housed some pancakes and Scrapple. That was a man, I was loving that. Scrapple is a mix of pork and wood chips.

It's very popular. And if you don't like the outside, just cut it open and take a look at the inside Yeah, and you'll be missing the days when all you knew was the outside, you know, it's inside there It's like whatever is inside a stress ball Squeeze your strap your scrapple when you're not supposed to riding you you're not supposed to swallow it You're supposed to chew it. Oh, okay. That's That's you're working the stress muscles out of your jaw. Yeah. It's like eating treacle. Right. Yeah. I carry a lot of stress in my jaw, so I do need to chew something.

That's your answer. Goldbelly.com slash Scrapple, I bet. A lot of people don't know, Jordan, but in Philadelphia, in addition to eating Scrapple, they also chew on Elm sap. I didn't know that. OK, so what is the Philadelphia thing? So like everybody knows about Scrapple and, as we just said, little Debbie cakes. Shut that one wrong.

Tasty cakes and Scrapple and cheese steaks. And if anything has ever been discussed on Jordan Jesse Goh, other than come, it's the time that we went to Benjamin Franklin's house and saw the giant diorama of the Continental Congress, where whoever is talking is is illustrated with a tiny spotlight. Right. And also, there's a giant bank of telephones to talk to world leaders of the past. That's right. So besides those things, what's the Philadelphia secret that we need to know? Boy, I mean, if you have children, the police touch museum is pretty incredible. It's built for children. So it's an exploratory space. The children are doing the touching. Yes, the children are doing the touching. So, you

know, as a child, I don't know how Philadelphia is. It's a little twisted, not that twisted. You know, if you're a kid in a museum, especially if you go to places like the Franklin Institute, another great Philadelphia place, science museum, some stuff there is interactive, but a lot is not. And you just, you want to touch and interact with stuff as a kid. You want to experience things in a tactile way. That's what the Please Touch Museum is all about. Everything there is meant to be interacted with. What's a good thing to interact with there? That's exactly what I was going to ask. You know, they have the bowl of spaghetti that's witches hair, the pupils are all

in their eyeballs. They're all spooky. Yeah, it's very spooky. It's sort of a haunted house for kids. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good, yeah, I mean, there's a great- There's a vat of boiling oil? Uh-huh. Yeah, you jump in. They tell you it's a hot tub, and that's how the class sizes are kept a little smaller.

Oh, that's good. So, the kids get more personal attention that way. Exactly. It's better. And you know, the ones that go in there probably would need to repeat a grade after they come out. Sure. So, it's all...

I think it all comes out. That class becomes bigger though, so it's a bad cycle. Now that I'm hearing it and talking about it, it seems like a terrible idea. Can I ask you guys a question? This is spaghetti related, not touching things related. Have you heard about everybody going through their streganona phase right now? No. Oh, this sounds kind of familiar.

This is like a meme, this a this is like a meme. This is like a yes cozy meme Yeah, everybody's an Italian grandma from the book streganona by Tommy de Paola. Mm-hmm I'm thinking I'm thinking this sounds pretty good to me, but I'm worried I'm gonna go into my fucking Big Anthony era this Lunkhead can't stop cooking pasta It's going all over the whole goddamn town. I'm in my Amelia Videlia era Misunderstanding things in kind of a funny way I'm in an emerald Lagasse era, and I have no frame of reference for that it just yeah, sounds like a fun It sounds similar right I just hit people and say bam. That's a fun era

I throw spice blow spice into their eyes. Stephen is celebrity chef Paul Pruitt home. Only the best. We're all having a great era we're all having our own little era over here they're all good yeah nobody's era is better than anybody else's. I mean a ton of pasta though sounds really good that might win. It might yeah that's the best. It's not a contest, but if it were. I mean, the thing about Big Anthony is he's like, he's, he's impetuous. He's not evil. Yeah.

He just makes stupid decisions because he wants to be a fucking Strega. You know, this guy wants to level up, but he's too fucking stupid. Strega Nona knows that. So she's trying to hold him back a little bit, but he fucking hears the spell up but he's too fucking stupid. Strega Nona knows that so she's trying to hold him back a little bit but he fucking hears the spell but he doesn't hear the spell that stops the pasta. Here's the spell that starts the pasta, Hal. This guy doesn't hear the... You don't want to know what happened when someone told me to make a sponge cake. Yeah, you better believe I cut up a kitchen sponge and put it in the

cake yeah I don't fucking care I'm twisted we should make a twisted Amelia Bedelia man I think so yeah when did she go into the public domain do we get to Winnie the Pooh blood and honey her all we need is like two million bucks we make 50 mm-hmm that's how that kind of shit works. I think we can do that So a few geysers of blood and some Confusions over words. Sure. Yeah, we're say like Amelia. But deal you we want this party to be a blast and then she blows everybody up right fucking Fingers falling. Yeah, this guy and shit and the chainsaws their asses. Yeah. Yeah boy. This is a real chainsaw up the ass, huh?

Okay And the chainsaws their asses. Boy, this is a real chainsaw up the ass, huh, Amelia? Okay, Amelia! You're putting it outside ways, bro! Wait, hell, is that the sound of someone... because they're shaking because of the chain? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's shaking them. Actually, they don't mind it that much. It's just...

Yeah. It's that it's powered by a gasoline motor. This is why Al Luplin is a professional voice actor with many impressive roles. Such as Louis Armstrong. Louis Armstrong, yes. Louis Anderson is Louis Armstrong. I see C is the green. Guy's the blue.

Look out, Louis! He's got a chainsaw! This doesn't feel great. And that was the last episode of Louis' World. You remember that? I do, Louis. I do. It really went out with a bang. Don't do any of that!

Amelia! Sorry, I already set the bomb! Okay, when something momentous happens, do you give us a call at 206-984-4FUN or just send us a voice memo. You know, I don't know if you know this, Hal, telephone's got a little app in there called Voice Memo. What? Just hit that record button, you're gonna come out sounding like crystal clear.

Then you just send that little send button, email it to jjgoatmaximumfun.org, you're all set. You're on the air of your favorite podcast. Nothing could be easier. We got this with Mark and Hal. Yeah, we'll play it too. Tights and fights. We should start sharing voicemails.

Yeah, let's just post a voicemail. We'll all comment on it. Hi Jordan, Jesse, and possible guests. This is Sam from Emeryville calling with a momentous occasion. I was down in LA this weekend and I'm currently driving back. I was visiting a friend for his 40th birthday, but that's not the momentous occasion. While I was down there, I kind of remembered this guy I'd met on Reddit, which, you know, the story ends well, don't worry, but he has the same sort of rare, semi-rare condition I have, a genetic progressive muscular disease

that can be pretty annoying and scary sometimes and I've never met anyone else with it and so I texted him and we met for the first time. It was the first person I've ever met with the same disorder. And we talked for two and a half hours and it was really special just to talk to someone who's going through the exact same thing I am and kind of has the same stuff going on. And I don't know, made a new kind of friend,

one I'd never really thought to make before, which is someone who really shares this thing that is pretty difficult to deal with. So I'd highly recommend it, I guess. Thought I'd call it in as a momentous occasion because it was a quick little weekend trip that feels like it meant more than it really should have or than I thought it would. Anyway, love you both. Thank you. Bye. Love you too. You know what would be really incredible for me? If I met somebody else that loved Taylor Swift as much as I do.

Well, sorry. Just talk for hours. Just talk for hours. This was a really lovely call. I'm really happy that our caller got to experience this. Sounds like a kind of a magical moment. The internet bringing people together, that's kind of the nice side of the internet and we need to hear more about that. I always say on the internet, nobody knows you're a dog.

That's, yeah. But yeah, really beautiful, really beautiful story. I, you know, not to note it to death. Right. But you're having a trip to LA. Let's have some hyper-specific local references. Yeah. Please.

Can you please bring up Bimbo's Clown Room? Jump, Jumpo's Clown Room. Bimbo's Clown Room. Al's Clown Room. Yeah, we met at Dan Tanna's for a meal. Zanku Chicken. Zanku Chicken. We want to Dan Tanna's for a meal. Zankoo chicken.

We want to hear about what you got at Zankoo chicken. We found the abandoned kookaroo and we got a meal there. It was lovely. Did you know that kookaroo is coming back? It is? That's a lie. Now here's the thing. I've been talking about kookaroo for so long on this show and others. My friend Jennifer Marmer,

the producer of Judge John Hodge, my friend and yours, Jennifer Marmer, she tells me Cuckaroo's coming back. You don't have to tell her. I've never actually been to the Cuckaroo. What? Your boy's never been to the Cuckaroo. She just like to say Cuckoo-ry. I just have these memories of visiting Los Angeles as a child. My mom's goddaughter lived here, Hollywood, with her husband. Visit Los Angeles, I'd see a cuckaroo and think, Jesus Christ, what the fuck's a cuckaroo?

They were everywhere for a while. I really, so they was like, I moved to LA in 2005-ish and they were, you couldn't turn a corner without smacking into a kukuru, a roasted chicken chain. So you would get like, it's kind of like KFC but with roasted chicken. It was like a healthy, it was like a sun-dried tomato kind of 80s thing. Yeah. They took Boston Market and made it healthy. A Boston Market I think came later. Yeah.

Almost certainly not healthy, but like in the imagination of a 1987 person, just if you picture yourself right now drinking a kiwi strawberry flavored beverage, that's, then you're going to the cuckoo roo for chicken dishes. Yeah. It's the only place you can get an Orangina in Los Angeles. Oh yeah. Love to have an Orangina. Tight little 80s. Orangina, cuckoo roo, goo goo cluster.

These are all things to say. I love to say them. You know, Jordan, this is a podcast. So why don't we say things? Jesse, I'm way ahead of you. I've been saying shit for about 70 minutes. Am I going to stop? Later.

You know I'm going to stop. I'm never going to start. I won't say anything. I refuse. I'm silent. I'm never say anything. I refuse. I'm silent. I'm never saying anything. There definitely was a time in Los Angeles that was before I lived here that in my mind was ruled only by two things. Like obviously now I know that the King of Los Angeles at the time was Huelhauser.

At the time I had never heard of him. But in my mind, there were two people, two institutions ruling, or an institution in a person, how about that, let's go with that, ruling Los Angeles. One was the Cuckoo Roo, and one was celebrity chef Wolfgang Puck. Just Wolfgang Puck was pointing to people and making them show business celebrities by putting barbecue chicken on pizzas. Right. Yeah. And giving people artichokes. I think these are, yeah, I think these probably came from the same, you know, little batch of food trends.

I mean, I think Kukuruchu, memorable logo. It's kind of a art, what do you call it? Art deco. It's a, it's sort of Memphis group. It's sort of a Memphis group aesthetic. It's a chicken. Yeah. In profile, right?

In profile, yeah, he's, I think he's straight, I guess I'm picturing him straight on. Maybe he's straight on. He's sort of abstracted. Yeah, it's a chicken. Yeah Profile right pro. Yeah, he's I think he's straight. I guess I'm picturing him straight on maybe sort of abstracted Yeah, it's he has a distinctive ruffle. I you know, I think a kukuru coincided with my My time as a PA so I've like picked up a lot of kukuru I've like filled a Toyota Corolla with kookaroo probably 400 times. I mean fucking Fran Drescher won't work without kookaroo. Oh she will not go on set. That was actually what was behind the writers, I mean the actor's strike.

That's right, yeah that's why Sag went on strike, because Fran couldn't get her kookoos. Why do you think it's coming back? How, what would Fran Drescher sound like if she refused to go on set because she couldn't have enough kookaroo? I'm not showing up until they have chicken You know that laugh she has that's her famous So I googled kookaroo That's the Who's winking at me you think he wants to fuck he wants to fuck Number one that's the healthy part because it's cardio or does he want me to eat him like those fucking like that nasty German guy People for sex nasty

German cannibal chicken. This is a coke roll chicken. I want you to consume me Val we fuck I sent you a envelope of mine cum. Do you think? Mine cum? That's his book. It's really bad. It's a terrible read. Can I ask you a question? Is it possible that Cuckoo Roo, the chicken Cuckoo Roo, you think this guy's one of those

cannibal cops? Yeah. I think he's probably one of those cannibal cops, right? I think he is too. That's why icing started. We were protesting the cannibal cops specifically. Right. Yes. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Eric Reed and Colin Kaepernick, the San Francisco safety and quarterback, the San Francisco 49ers. So let's do this. Let's take a break. Colin Kaepernick's a vegan now. We'll not touch cuckoo.

Oh, no. Yeah, ironically. I bet they all have a vegan option for him. Yeah, that's probably true. Steven, we'll take a break. Steven, find out the status of the cuckoo return and if they have any vegan options and we'll talk about it when we come back. We'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jessica. La la la la la la la la la la la la

You never know what you'll learn more about on the Celebrity Trivia Show Go Fact Yourself. For over 150 episodes, we've welcomed guests like DJ Jazzy Jeff, Audie Cornish, and Andy Richter to tell us why they love what they love, and then get quizzed on it. And past quizzes have included some pretty unexpected topics like Reverse painting The perfect flip turn while swimming and then get quizzed on it. And past quizzes have included some pretty unexpected topics like... Reverse painting. The perfect flip turn while swimming. Prince's house party playlist

from that one episode of New Girl. And so much more. Plus, our guests meet surprise experts in their topics. Like the time we met an actual celebrity cow. So listen to Go Fact Yourself twice a month, every month on Maximum Fun. Do it for the cow! No! Go fact yourself twice a month every month on Maximum Fun. Do it for the cow! Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo companion to The Greatest Generation, our hit show about back catalog Star Trek that you grew up with.

It's a comedy podcast by two folks who used to be video producers, so it's a serious mix of comedy and insight that fits right into the Maximum Fun network of shows. And Greatest Trek is one of the most popular Star Trek podcasts in the world. So if you're following Lower Decks, Prodigy, or Strange New Worlds, come hang out with us every Friday as we roast and review our favorite Star Trek shows. It's on MaximumFun.org, YouTube or your podcasting app. It's Jordan Jessi Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.

Jordan Morris, boy, detective. How luvlin'. Don't let me mail you things. Bad news. Remember from earlier? It's come. Hide your address. Do you have like an opt-out, like the Marshall Fields catalog?

I do, but you can't find it. I have to mail it to you. You belong to the catalog associations, or if you fill out that thing on the internet, you won't just to save the environment, they'll only send you electronic cum? I operate on the sort of shadow set of rules So I'm not really governed by an international body if you mail cum. It's just not so twist Nobody's really checking you god. That's twisted. I mean a little bit it is. Yeah Yeah, how you're one of the hosts of we got this with our friend mark gagliardi true the two of you

settle things Like what's the best condiment? Yes. Or whatever. Sure. What's something that you've settled recently that was of interest? What is something we settled recently? You know, when we record these, they go right out of my head almost immediately.

Sure. What is one we did recently? I have the same problem with mayonnaise, the best condiment. It just slips right out. I should refrigerate it. I think when I did the show not too long ago, we did best prequel. That's right. We went through prequels and I guess there was some argument, there was a weird loophole

that Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, technically a prequel for some weird reason. Because it's so upsetting? Yes. So I think we had to do some back and forth as to whether or not that would count as a prequel. That seems like bullshit. I think we agreed that it was bullshit. Yeah.

I feel like if you have to be like like, but actually then you're full of bullshit If the word technically is in there generally you're gonna throw it out What we did do recently for Halloween was best fruit candy best flavored candies We've done we established when we did our first best Halloween candy with John Hodgman back in 2015 It's Reese's peanut butter cups one presumes I believe that was that believe that was we come what came up with, but we eliminated all fruit flavored candy right away. Well, Hajman doesn't like fruit flavored candy.

Hajman barely likes, Hajman will eat a peanut butter candy, but only because it's almost not a candy. It's like the meat of candy. But I mean, fruit, I don't remember as a kid, I enjoy a fruit flavored candy, but I was always more excited about chocolate Flavored things yeah, I'm in that boat too like somebody hands me one of those little strawberries that you know those Those are fun, and you know you know I have some nice memories of getting mambas at the public pool sure Yeah, fruit flavored candy now and later's rule mambas at the public pool. Sure. Yeah, fruit flavored candy. Now and later is rule mambas drool.

Wow. Oh, hold on. Hold on. Steven? Steven? Can he say that? I think we have to cut this part of the podcast. Can he say that?

Steven, you got the memo, right? I'm kind of twisted. You're a little twisted. Can he? The mamba freaks are going to be up your ass and you're going to come growling to me. It's funny that you mention it though, Hal, because I'm not really supposed to eat chocolate because it's migraine trigger for me. I'll eat a little bit now and then, but I can't eat like a chocolate thing.

I could eat like a fun-size-size Snickers bar and be fine But like you need a big chocolate thing so and I try and avoid the chocolate So I really try and get to know the non chocolate candy options very passionate about the Zots that we have in the live In the in the lobby here. Sure. KT our colleague has been providing Zots for the Max fun community Because they came in some sort of value bag of candy that we bought for the Max Fun drive for like a guess the number of candies game. And then I started talking about Zots all the time. Now they have to buy these giant candy bags just to get me Zots.

What are the other candies in the bag? Just true garbage. Dum-dums? Just like dum-dums and generic peppermints. The soft the soft no the hard star elements are good. Yeah, they are no They're like that's it. That's a texture. Yeah. Oh, that's a texture There's a woman at the flea market who always has pillow mints You know just in a little bowl at her I go in there and pretend to want to buy something from her every single time So I can get a couple of those pillaments.

Nat. Do you pick a couple or do you do like the claw? Like I'm digging in like I'm like it's construction. Jeff. I'll do a claw like thing, but it's just so that it appears that I'm only taking one but I'm actually taking more than one. Nat. Sure, of course. Yeah, you it's the magician. It's the prestige. You're grabbing with one and then these three. Jeff. I'll also do it like a wave my other hand up in here As a misdirect yeah

Then you have an acrobat But I really I'm a really I'm really nuts about Contemporary variations on nerds I love thing what it because there are some hot new nerds, right? There's nerds, gummy clusters. I don't nerds. Ropes are fine. Okay. I don't have a problem with nerds. A lot about the nerd rope. Nerd rope's fine. I have nerd rope was pretty good, but it's not, it's, it's three steps below the others, uh,

which are giant chewy nerds and nerds gummy clusters. Nerds gummy clusters. My wife purchased some nerds gummy clusters to, I guess to give to trick or treaters at our home or something. Because as we record this Halloween's coming up, and ooh, I wanna eat all those clusters. Right, because it's gummy on the inside

and then actual nerds on the outside. It's had a nerd shell. Yeah, and the nerds, because nerds themselves, that's a child level of flavor. You know what I mean? Like, only a child can handle that just pure injection of sugar and artificial flavor. It's too intense for an adult. It's a pixie stick in like small solid form. They turn it into rubble to make you think it's less.

But I love it. I mean, but I couldn't just eat a box of Nerds as an adult man. I couldn't handle it. But those gummy clusters, they really take it to the next level. And then giant chewy Nerds have like a crunchy Nerd shell outside of a chewy gummy-ish center. And a lot of wonderful flavor in those things. Have you tried jock candy yet? No, wait a minute.

Not candy. I'm eating burnouts over here. Even goths. Rockers. Yeah, yes. Yeah, these all work. Yeah, well they are the little candy Gary Glitter albums. You eat them, but you spike.

It's a good candy right there. Oh yeah. Nerd, what? I don't, I've not tried gummy clusters. I'm interested. Yeah. Nor have I tried ropes nor the giant gummy nerds. But is, was there something, were there sales flagging?

Because their whole thing was the little, it was the two-sided box with two flavors. So I missed the two-sided box part the two-sided box That's that's over. Is that dead? I don't know if that still exists. It is It is the obviously the most classic element of nerds The satisfaction of sliding that little slider. Yep Is obviously what you're looking for out of nerds, and I can't claim that these new variations on nerds replicate that experience. Okay.

You know, it's just rainbow flavor or rainbow berry flavor or whatever. Can I suggest just like a fun game we could all play? Because Jesse, I know you don't, you're not a drinker. How you're also not a drinker, right? Also, yeah, never been. So, I mean, obviously we can't ice each other Right true nerds nerding nerds So we you know if I present you a box of nerds you got to slide that little slider

And you got a chug got to take a knee and chug the nerds. That sounds pretty good. I like it. It's called getting nerded. All right. I love it. I'm in. Hal, it's been a joy to have you on Jordan, Jesse, Go.

Thank you so much for making the trip on it. It's always nice to see you, friend. It's an absolute pleasure. I'm thrilled to be here and get to hang out with you guys. We got this. It's so funny. It is such a funny show. Thank you.

Yeah. Mark and Hal are both absolute joys. And if you're a wrestling fan, Tights and Fights is an absolute delight with Daniel Radford, who's been a guest on the show many times. Just an absolute joy of a program if you like the wrestles. Yeah. They're both a lot of fun and very different from one another. We got this, we just did our 500th episode as of this recording that has dropped and

is out for consumption. I was on that. You were. I don't remember what I did, but... It's a surprise to you as well as anybody who listens. But that's really fun. And then Tights and Fights with Danielle and Lindsay and Julian producing it. The voicemail you had sent in of somebody finding somebody they had

something in common with and connecting with them. That is much deeper version than what the three of us get to do every week but it's rare to meet other wrestling fans who are also into all the other things that you're into. So the way we connect with each other and get to share that with people is just a real privilege and I remember asking you about it all those years before it started saying I would love to do a wrestling podcast. A special place for wrestling fans who aren't dicks. That's right.

I knew a lot of them. I said, they're going to need a place to gather because a lot of these other places, they're full of dicks. We're here for you. Yep. Anyway, well, it's been a delight. Jordan Jesse Goh, of course, is produced by Steve and Ray Morris. Our theme music is Love You by The Free Design, courtesy of The Free Design and Light in the Attic

Records. Well, gosh, Jordan, if people want to talk to us on social media, why not hit up Instagram, where we're at Jordan David Morris and at Jesse Thorne, very famous. Or check out the Jordan Jesse Goh Instagram for dank memes and more. Very dank. Dank memes and more. That's Jordan Jessie Go Pod on Instagram. You can also find us on Reddit at maximumfun.reddit.com where you can chat about this very episode. And look, if you're a nerd who nerds a nerd, let us know about it. Or your momentous occasions or whatever the fuck. Yeah, nerd your friends.

If they've not heard this podcast, they won't know what you're doing, but explain it to them and tell them they have to. Well, I think that's it. We'll talk to you next time on Jordan Jesse Go. I'll hug you and kiss you and love you. Love you. Love you.

Love you. Love you