Joy, a Podcast. Hosted by Craig Ferguson - Keith Robinson

Episode Date: July 15, 2025

Meet Keith Robinson, stand-up comedian and actor. You may recognize him from The Wanda Sykes Show, the podcast 3 Girls 1 Keith, as well as a wide variety of comedy and late night shows. For more from Keith, watch his special Different Strokes on Netflix.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Listen to Agus Sopa on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. This is me, Craig Ferguson. I'm inviting you to come and see my brand new comedy hour. Well it's actually about an hour and a half and I don't have an opener because these guys cost money. But what I'm saying is I'll be on stage for a while. Anyway come and see me live on the pants on Fire tour in your region. Tickets are on sale now and we'll be adding more as the tour continues throughout 2025 and beyond.

For a full list of dates, go to thecraigfergusonshow.com. See you on the road, my dears. My name is Craig Ferguson. The name of this podcast is Joy. I talk to interesting people about what brings them happiness. Hello, my name is Craig Ferguson. Welcome to The Tent here in the Kids Super Studios

in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, where we record the Joy podcast. Today, my guest on the podcast is one of the stalwarts of the New York slash Philly, but more really New York. I think of him as New York. He's from Philly, but well, you'll hear all about it. He's a great comedian. And as you are about to see, if you don't already know,

he's got a standup special on Netflix called Different Strokes about his strokes, which he folded into his comedy in a way, which I have nothing but admiration for. He's a great comic, a very funny man. Keith Robinson, everybody. I think you still, uh, still see one that I haven't seen one done forever. Oh, I'm telling she, she's, uh. She's a good stand up, isn't she?

Mary, you're great. She's one of the best. She kind of is. The last time I saw her, it wasn't long after Chris had done that joke about her at the Oscars, she was like, what the fuck is that? He had done some joke about her at the Oscars. Do you remember that?

Really? Yeah, I can't remember what it was, but she was like, what the fuck? But she, you worked with her when we were at CBS, right? Yes. You were doing the Wanda, is it the Wanda Sykes Show? Wanda Sykes Show, yes. And you had the big studio and we had the little studio.

Oh man. That's what I remember, because we had the little studio. Oh man. That's what I remember. Cause we had the little studio. Cause that's what we were saying just before. The comedians used to be on, they were on my late night show cause the studio was so small. We had to move my desk to the side and I had to get out of the way to put the comedians on.

Oh wow. And the, a lot of comedians thought I was like being a dick because I wouldn't meet them. It's not that I wouldn't meet them, I just didn't meet them, I was going home. Between me and you. Yeah.

Were you? Yeah, I kinda was, yeah. Yeah. I kinda was, yeah. I was kinda like, fuck it. Fuck them. Oh, Carrot Top's on, great. Tell them I've left already. I've left the building. Do I tell you, oh Carrot Top's on, great. Tell him I've left already.

He's out the left of the building. Do I tell you something about Carrot Top though? This is true. Have you ever seen him perform? He's a great performer. He's unbelievable, right? He gets a bad name, but I've never watched it. I've seen him live a couple of times

and I've hung out with him. Have you? You know why? that's because comics, we stick to you know, we're running packs. Right. Right. If you ain't a part of that pack, you're out. Yeah.

So you did puppets and all that. That's right, when you went to do the puppets and stuff, you're gone, yeah I know, I did the puppets on late night, I was like, you're gone, you know? You're gone, beat it. Well, that's why I was like, I saw you do a set at the Village Underground, the Comedy Sailor place last week.

I was like, fuck, that's as good as ever I've seen. And given the fact that you've had a stroke, and it was two strokes. Yeah, you don't just have one stroke. Cause you gotta compare it to something. I don't know. I mean, I feel like you can get one stroke. No, no, no.

I'm like, this one didn't feel right. Let me see. I don't know. Is it the sequel? The sequel is never as good as the first one, though. Yes. Oh man, the sequel was a doozy. Wow.

Yeah, I remember you saying. Did you know, do you know when the second one was happening? You're like, fuck it's happening again. Did you, did you feel it? Yes, I knew the first one was happening, and the second one. Well, do you know it was a stroke when it was happening? Yes, I'm a man, Craig.

I'm a man. I'm a man, too, but if I was a man... No, no, no. You're not a real man. No, that's true. I'm foreign. I'm foreign born. That's all. A real man would take a stroke on just as soon as like... But did you, like, did it come on gradually or was it just like fuck, it's a stroke? Like one morning, for the first stroke I woke up and I was leaning.

Walk into my apartment leaning. Wait, you woke up walking to your apartment? No, I woke up in my apartment. Oh, you were walking through your apartment. I'm walking through my apartment and I'm leaning. Something's going on. Right. My right side was going down. So I'm like, oh man.

Had you had a big night the night before? Had you been like doing, like being wild? Were you out drinking? No, no wild. I don't really drink that much. Right. A couple of wines and all that. Right. But I woke up and I was leaning and I'm like,

okay, let me go to Philadelphia. I drove from Jersey to Philadelphia till I get my passport. So, something's going on behind me. I brought some aspirin with me. I took a couple of aspirins. Okay, I was all right, I drove and filled it. You feel better? You were driving?

Yeah, well, I'm a man, once again. Yeah, you're a man, yeah, I got it. You were driving, yeah. Yeah. A dumb man, but I'm a man. No, I got it, no. I've been with the same woman for 20 years. She's driven me twice.

Uh-huh. I've been with the same woman for 20 years. She's driven me twice. She's like white. She's a perfectly decent driver. I'm like, yeah, but I'll drive. Yeah, I got it. I like that. You are a man. I am a man. So now if I have a stroke now, I'll be like, okay, I know what it is. I'll be like, okay, I know what that says. Yeah. And I, I don't, maybe it'll be recompense for using the puppets in late night. Cause I can get a load back into the pack. He did do the puppets, but he also had a stroke. So yeah.

Yeah. He was saying that. Were you on your own when you drove to Philly though? Yes. Jesus. I'm a man. But so did you go to the hospital when you got to Philly, though? Yes. Jesus. I'm a man. Well, yeah. But so, did you go to the hospital when you got to Philly? Would a man go to a hospital? I feel like maybe I- I went to the social security place to get my passport.

Okay. Where were you going when you needed a passport? Scotland. Shut the fuck up. You were, no you weren't. I was going, you know, passport. Scotland. Shut the fuck up. Yes. No, you weren't. I was going abroad. Right. But I didn't go abroad because of the stroke.

So I had a stroke for like, it must have been a 24 hour stroke. Right. Cause I went there and I went to see my son. He was performing at a place. And I want to see him the place look like. But I was going down. I can feel myself going down. It was getting worse. Yes. All right. But I, you know, I'm very, you was blurry and all that,

but I took a couple of more aspirin and the aspirin is helping again. Cleared up. Oh, there you go. I drove back home. Oh, you are a man. To Jersey, damn right. Yeah, you are a man. I drove back to Jersey. Yeah.

Man, I went to the cellar, there's a radio show. Really? Yes. You still haven't seen a medical professional. No. That was 24 hours ago, because you're a man.

Yeah, I get it. Yeah, it is. So you haven't seen a medical professional who Never 24 hours a day. Cause you're a man. Yeah, I got it. Yeah. So you haven't seen a medical professional who were now 24 hours into the stroke, but you're taking aspirin for a stroke. Yes. But it's working. Cause I guess the blood, it clamps in the blood.

So, you know, after that, I drove back home. Well, right after I did the radio show, I was supposed to do a spot, but everything just dropped, energy, everything. All right. I'm like, oh shit. So I went down the alleyway, Manetta Lane, straight down the alleyway,

walked down there, got my car and drove home. Again, with the driving? Drove home, yes. Where do you live? Jersey. In Jersey. That's like a half hour, 40 minutes away. You take a bridge in the tunnel. I mean, I just, cause you know, everyone know that.

Just to make it longer. Yeah. I wanna ride a little longer. Right. Cause you're mad Yeah. I want to ride a little longer. Cause I'm a man. Cause you're a man. I want a Holland Tunnel straight to turn. Yeah. See I take the tunnel. I think the tunnel is fine.

People are always like, no, you can't take the tunnel. I'm like, I don't know. It's not like you can get off the bridge either. No, right. I took that tunnel. Okay. Went home and then it really hit. Called my girlfriend at the time.

She was in the house. You know, she came out and I can barely walk now. Okay. But I still like, just to make sure I did 10 pushups. You're fucking lying. No, I'm lying, I'm lying. You're fucking lying. But she took me into, and I'm taken to the hospital,

and they're like, he's having a stroke. Were you scared at this point? No, I understand that was probably the wrong question. What the hell is going on? I'm not explaining. I clearly explained to you who I am. I feel like I brought a little bit of myself there. I got scared for you, but I'm less manly. I get a little frightened sometimes.

Sometimes I, I would worry about, I worry about it. What did they say to you? It was a dumb thing. Well, they said, you know, like I was still, I said am I all right? Cause I box a little bit, you know what I mean? And I was throwing jabs. I went in the hospital and woke up and this all went down.

I'm like, I'm trying to throw jabs and all that, nothing. This all went down, that leg was down. I was in the hospital for like a month and a half. A month and a half? Were you in a bed for a month and a half? No. They let you walk around? Well, in a hospital they try to restrict you

as much as possible. So, like, no. When you try to get up, like when you're in the brain, injury unit, if you get out on the bed and your feet touch the floor, alarm goes off. So it's like almost being in the pen, penitentiary. Yeah, I understand what that is. I've been in this country for a while.

I can speak the lingo. And soon as you put it to the ground, all the nerves come running in and all that. So it took a while to trust me and do what I do. And then I went to the rehab. And then we have to do all the tricks and tell you this and tell you that and for your cognitive. Right.

To make sure you're as smart as Donald Trump. They, you know. And that's the baseline. Because I suppose it depends on what hospital you go to. I mean, they're fancy hospitals. It might be, it's got to be a little more. You got to do a little more. But I think that, you know, did they test you like with jokes and stuff like that?

No, they test you with like square circles. They think that something, you know, they ask you every day, what's today's date? What's this? What's that? Why? I don't know if I could answer that. No, I mean, fuck with them sometimes. Yeah, you do it. You would.

You got it. You got it. You got to get bored. They ask you your name. What's your name? Remembering Dr. Martin Luther King. Telling, huh? They almost had a heart attack. He's really messed up. Oh my God. This guy's messed up.

So what caused it? Did you know what caused it? No. Wasn't like iced coffee around it? It was like, combined eating habits and cholesterol. Oh, cholesterol. With that damn caffeine and all that.

Yeah, I gotta watch my cholesterol. I went for a thing. I know you had a stroke, but I had a medical recently. And they told me I have to bring my cholesterol down. I think they scourced for everything. Yeah. And they told me I have to bring my cholesterol down. I think they scouts for everything. Yeah. Hello, this is Craig Ferguson. And I want to let you know,

I have a brand new standup comedy special out now on YouTube. It's called, I'm So Happy. And I would be so happy if you checked it out. To watch the special, just go to my YouTube channel at the Craig Ferguson Show. And this is right there. Just click it and play it and it's free. I can't, look, I'm not gonna come around your house

and show you how to do it. If you can't do it, then you can't have it. But if you can figure it out, it's yours. You're about the same age as me, aren't you? You're like a couple of years younger. What age are you? No, I'm 78. Yeah, I should... Fuck you, man.

Like, are you 60 yet? Yes. I'm 63 now. Oh, you old man. I pee more than I do anything else. So do I, man. I'm like, I can't stop peeing. I don't like...

I didn't even drink anything. I don't even know why. There's nothing here. I'm like the fucking Sahara Dupain. I'm like the fucking Sahara Dupain. I'm like the fucking Sahara Dupain. I'm like the fucking Sahara Dupain. I'm like the fucking Sahara Dup man. I'm like, I can't stop peeing. I'm like, I didn't even drink anything. I don't even know why. There's nothing here.

I'm like the fucking Sahara desert and there's still pee coming out. It's crazy. I'm almost scared to drink water. I'm like, I don't want to pee. I don't know why I'm up again. I was walking over the Williamsburg Bridge today because I was trying to go stay healthy.

And I started to walk over the bridge and I thought, I don't know if I can get over it. I don't know. I don't feel like I'll give it a go. But by the time I got over, I was like, I had to find a hipster coffee shop. But that's why it's important, man. It's important for a man like us to find women

that understand a man that will pee himself. Well, I drank a lot when I was younger. So I met, that was kind of the way I would always find a woman that... and he'll pee himself. Well, I drank a lot when I was younger, so I met, that was kind of the way I would always find a woman. The good thing is, well, here's a trick by the way. If you wake up and there's pee in the bed, don't assume responsibility right away.

Try and say, is there something wrong? Do you feel sick? Lay off the, you know. I like it. Yeah, just blame the pee I like it. Yeah. Just blame the pee on someone else. Exactly. It doesn't work that well with vomit, but it works with pee.

Yeah, pee is a good thing. I think so. But did you, were there no signs of this? Did you know the signs of the stroke coming? Well, the signs of the stroke, like. Like before you had it, I mean. You had a blood pressure. Oh, did you have high blood pressure?

They would tell me your blood pressure. Oh, the high blood pressure? They were telling me my blood pressure is high. Right. And I was going to Vegas for, like me, Kevin Hart said, come on, I'm Vegas, why not? That's my young fella. Right, and also you probably wanna see Carrot Top as well. Yeah, you know what, I like Carrot Top.

So do I, that's what I'm saying. I'm gonna have him on the show. I do like Carrot, as well, cause. Yeah, you know what? I like Carrot Top. So do I, that's what I'm saying. I'm gonna have him on the show. I do like Carrot, I'm not fucking around. I do like him. I think he's a much maligned character. But I watch it happen, man. Comics, they have just, bro. They chase other comics out of the business.

Yeah, no, they're like. They are, they're like. They're like hyenas, man, I never really hung with comics. So now I was like, no. And then when, when I was a young comic, cause I was just like drunk and I would, and I would hang out with bands. And then when I got late night, cause I had worked on the Drew Carey show and it's, it was seen like I had stolen the job from a comic in some way because

it's mad. Yeah. They was like way because I was a fucking comic for years before I did the Drew Carey show. And they're like, you do comedy in Scotland? Yeah. And in London too, I did stand up. I came in there, Scotland and in London in 92. That's the year I got sober.

Really? Yeah. That's probably why, because you were there. I was like, fuck man, he's here. A real man in Scotland. There's a real man here now, I can't drink anymore. I bombed so bad in Scotland. Did you really?

Ooh. At the Edinburgh Festival? No, we had something called light number comedy. Okay. And we wore jackets and all I had the girls wore phones. And we were in Scotland and I love Scotland. And but you guys like to fight. Well, that's why I left.

Because I, you know, it's a real man situation. Yeah, that's a real man. They showed me some real men. Yeah, no, there's a little bit of fighting. Yeah, they were like, I don't have you. What? You don't have me? What does that mean?

Yeah, you know, I know. Do you know what, some of the things, the way they say things, like, you know, people say in America, if they say you've got follow through, he's like, he's got real follow through. It's like, yeah. And follow through in Britain means you've shit yourself. So if you say to somebody, Oh, he followed through. You go, really?

He followed like he sheds out. Really? I didn't make sense. It kind of feels. Well, I followed through. Yeah. No, I loved it. You had a good time.

That was my first time abroad like that. You know, so I'm like, oh wow. I had a wonderful time. Where did you? We were there for like a month. Where are you in? Edinburgh or Glasgow? Glasgow, Edinburgh, yeah.

Yeah, Glasgow is, that's where I'm from, Glasgow. Well, that's why I seen who the guy that always on the piano. Comedian. Liberace? No. Comedian? Comedian. Liberace? No. The comedian? The comedian.

Scottish guy? Yes. I don't know. He's real big. Yeah, but if he's got a piano. It's kind of like having a puppet. He's one of the biggest, Connelly's out. With a piano?

With a Billy. Oh, Billy Connelly? Yes. Oh, he was like fucking Jackie Robinson to me, Billy Connolly, because until Billy, Billy's 20 years older than me. Oh wow. And he was like my hero,

because he was from, in Britain, you know, the class system thing, I'm from like the lower classes, and he was a working class community and I had never seen anybody from my background when I was like 10 years old and he was like 30 years old so he's just coming up and happening and we would listen to his albums the way American kids would listen to like Cosby albums and stuff I would be listening to Billy's stuff. Well, yeah, I'd seen him on, he was on one state

at a hotel in Glasgow. Right. And, you know, he was playing the piano. I didn't even know Billy could play the piano. Yeah. Well, you know, I never associate him with the piano, is what I mean. Well, I'd seen him on, you know,

and then Billy Collins, you know, whatever. Well, it's that thing, you know, you, you, you fuck one sheep, you know, that's all everybody remembers. Yeah, but I loved it, you know. You had a good time. Why did you never go back? Will you go back? I told you I bombed. Yeah, but everybody bombs everywhere. Even you got it. No, that one was a bull.

Really? Did they, was wasn't a bull. Really? Was it like booing and stuff? No, it wasn't booing. Cause the cult, like we went to London. Right. Like in America, we like, we try to energy. Yeah. Ah, but the crowds were laid back. Yeah.

And you don't need to all this. No. Slow down. Yeah. But I'm't need to all this. No. Slow down. Yeah. But I'm like, eh, I'm all going to watch this. You know? Yeah. They get mad at you. Nah.

Yeah. We've had that one happen. The, uh, you ever heard musicians talk about when they go to Japan and play tours in Japan? Uh-huh. And they'll be like fucking rocking out on stage and the end of the show, the audience would be like. Yeah. Just culturally different, that's all.

Yeah, you have to learn. Yeah, you gotta learn. Well, now I had a stroke, that's a difference. The stroke helped me, me. Like without a stroke, I was, you know, packed from my home, I'd scramble all over. With a stroke, Tom Brainy in the pocket. You know what I mean?

Moved to the left more, you know. He's a little bad, yeah. But you know what, I mean, like, that is a thing though. Learning how to stay still on stage and do your thing is actually, you know. It's better for you. It's much better for like the best comics. They don't run around doing all that.

I used to run like a fucking idiot. I fall down. I'd be like, oh, trying to hit every individual thing. And now I'm like, if I walk out and then I'll talk and then I walk back. That's it. That's all I'm going to do. Well, you learn that though, through the years. It takes time.

It takes time as well. When did you first get back up after the stroke? Was it at the cellar? The first stroke, it took me like maybe a couple, a few weeks and I'm back on stage. Man, that is fucking stones there. I mean, you are, man. That's fucking incredible.

The second one. Yeah. Like two years. Second one was much worse then, huh? Yeah. You didn't drive your way through them? Yeah, because of my voice. Because of my voice came back world good

with the first stroke. Right. Now with this one, and like you're not gonna be able to talk again, and nah, nah, nah. You gonna be able to talk again, and nah, nah, nah. You wanna get me to talk again, tell me I'm not gonna be able to talk again. I'm like, all right, I'll tell you.

You know, I have that. Did it take a while? I mean, it took two years to get on stage. It took a while, yeah. Well, that's because you're scared, don't know if the war is gonna come out. Right. What will happen if the war that I get on stage

all of a sudden, nothing. Yeah. I was like, oh shit. Well, it's funny, when I saw you do the set the other night, it was like, I watched it and I was like, fuck, how is this gonna go? Cause I, you know, I hadn't seen the special at that point. I just watched it and went, okay, okay, fine,

fucking nailed it. But I hadn't seen it special at that point. I just watched it and went, okay, okay, fine, fuck it, nailed it. But I hadn't seen it and I was like, I'd heard that you'd had a stroke. And I was like, I don't know how this is gonna work. Well, that's what my thing was, like, phew. But what was amazing, like after about 30 seconds, you're just a comic on stage. Well, you gotta make it though.

Why I do my best to be such an asshole. You go fuck that guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it was kind of interesting though. It becomes, because you make it, like it's like it's part of the thing. You know, it's just like, this is who I am. This is what I'm doing.

And it kind of, yeah. I hate that. That would freak me out. Get out of there with that shit. Did you get by that when you first went up? Did you feel it with the first time? Yeah, but I say something so fucked up, they go fuck him.

Yeah. That's what I want you to. Yeah. That's exactly what I want you to. Fuck him. Fuck him. How dare he? It's an interesting thing.

Tell me about the second one then. That was, how long between the first and the second one? I had a second one in 2016. Oh, right. The next one came 2020. The end of 2020. Did you get COVID or something? Did that do it? I got, no.

I just, what happened, and I tried my best. It's a real story. This girl wanted me to meet her, and we were supposed to go to Vegas together. Boom, yeah, set up, everything's good. But COVID came, no Vegas. Around Thanksgiving in 2020, she said, well, why don't you come see me at my house?

Ain't that going on? You know, you can't have things given with your family or whatever. Say, I'll go to Phoenix, Arizona to get some. Right, so this is a romantic assignation. Yeah. Okay, I got it. I brought flowers with me now.

You should bring flowers. Gas station flowers are fine, but you know, they should be flowers. Yeah, yeah. So I tell everybody, my son is mom and all that, I'm going to perform with Louis CK. So it wouldn't be too much, I said, I'm going to perform for Louis,

all the stuff he wants to and now me, I had more. So I get the stroke and I was on my way out, flying there, like this is real shit, flying to Arizona. I'm first class of course. Obviously, yeah. I got it. Yeah, yeah, it goes without saying.

I'm a man. You're a man, you're just sitting over there running the plane, I got it. So I'm drinking, you know, they give you all, I'm plastic. But they, you know, when they make the announcement, 20 minutes away when I, so I'm, and I'm up. I'm like, oh, 20 minutes, 10 minutes to our house,

30 minutes, I'll pop the Viagra. Cause I want to be ready. You took Viagra 20 minutes before landing because you figured it would be 30 minutes to rest. Knowing you'd already had a fucking stroke. That's where it keeps him. This is the greatest fucking story I've ever heard. So I get in the car.

Once I get off the plane, I get on the plane. I start to feel. Do you have an erection at this point? Of course. Right, good get in the car. Once I get off the plane, I want to get off the plane. I start to feel it. Do you have an erection at this point? Of course. Right, good, okay, so. That's what kept me walking. Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha.

So, I'm like, oh shit. Now I get in the car, I'm like, oh fuck. Should I go to the hospital? Or get laid? Or, yeah, it's a real question. Or get laid. Or get laid, it's a dilemma. No, I'm not going on the door.

Right, yeah, you're gonna. She got in there, opened the door, we started doing those somethings, and then it just was over. I still spend the night. Right. And I woke up, I couldn't even move the ambulance came in. Wow.

Yeah, the ambulance lifted me up out of the pussy. Oh, man. So, so again, there was that. You spend the whole night there. Yes. So, but when you- I'm a man. I understand, I understand. But this is amazing to me.

So there's the, you take the FIAC test, so the Vagra wears off or doesn't wear off? It doesn't wear off. It's just, you know, my body's like, you're about to die, what are you doing? You're about to die, but your penis is still. I was trying my best, man. Jesus, so you were, what, like you were in the hospital in Phoenix then? Yes, I was in the hospital in Phoenix,

and I'm like, I can't stay here. That's Phoenix, you can't stay there, you can go for a weekend, but you can't stay there. No, I'm like, I said I need to go back. Yeah. The doctor said, no can't stay there. You can go for a weekend, but you can't stay there. No, I said I need to go back. Yeah. And I said, no, you're not supposed to fly back on a stroke. Fly me back.

I'm gone. And I flew back. First class. Of course. Yeah, I'm sorry. I just wanted to make sure that. You think I'm gonna have a stroke? A stroke and then.

And a coach? Yeah. 34B? No, you don't'm gonna have a stroke? A stroke and then? And a coach? Yeah. 34B? No, you don't wanna have a stroking coach. No, that's bad. That's like the kid behind you with the back of your chair. I would've been dead by the time I got to the front.

Yeah, no, you have to have it. So, but you didn't have one of the, you flew back. How long until you flew back? I stayed there a night and I flew right back. You're kidding me. Why do I keep telling you? No, I know, but I mean, Jesus Christ, Keith. I did it.

That's nuts. And so you went- It is nuts. When I think about it, I'm like, what the hell was I thinking? And also the fact they let you on the plane. You, I mean, You could have fucking died. I was on a plane like this.

I've seen people on planes like that though. But they figured I was drunk. They just thought you were drunk and so they let you on? I guess I don't know. Cause you were first class, they let you on. Cause he's first class. What are you gonna do?

He's in first class. How bad could he be? Yeah, he's not gonna die, he's first class. He's just sitting there like this. Fuck. Yeah, man. So what happens after you have a stroke, though, when you're on your way back?

Do you have to go to the physical rehab? What happens, Wanda sent me a driver. Wanda there? Yeah. That's fucking great. Well, you know me and Wanda were roommates and all that. Yeah, yeah, you go back away, yeah. So, but she sent me a room with my man Robert

and my son's mom and all of them came and picked me up and we drove to the hospital in Jersey, in JFK. From JFK? Well, no, we served, the Jersey, JFK. From JFK? Well, no, we served, the hospital was JFK. Oh, JFK Hospital, you didn't fly, it was JFK Airport to JFK Hospital. Newark. Newark Airport?

Yeah. JFK, I don't suppose that's an important part of the story, but it's worth knowing. No, it's not that important. It's not that important. From Newark to Jersey Hospital. How long not that important. From Newington Jersey Hospital. How long does that take? Do you take the bridge or the tunnel?

I think it was for last few, So how long are you like totally incapacitated? When they're saying to you, he's not gonna speak again, he's not gonna do all that. I was never incapacitated? When they're saying to you, he's not gonna speak again, he's not gonna do all that. I was never incapacitated. All right. I'm always fighting. Right. You know what I mean?

Cause when you go to the hospital, they treat every patient. All strokes ain't the same. But they treat you like out of your mind and you don't know what's going on. Right. And. That was never the case for you though, right?

No, no, hell no. That's weird. But they, you know, one woman, they don't like you move. Like, no, no, no, you can't move. I said, I wanna go to the bathroom. You can't hold yourself up. And that bitch, look at me. I'm starting on you know setups And this look like a camp for myself up

Nah, I You bitch We I got choked by a pack of nurses you could jump. Yeah, they jumped me What did you what they do? They take your stuff? When you you know, you got a stroke or whatever, your leg shoots up, cause you get spasms. Right.

And then you shout out, and a woman's like, oh, he's fighting me, he's fighting me. Oh, and so they all jumped in there. Yeah, they jumped on me. Cause you thought you were kicking them? Yeah, I'm like, bitch, spasms. I'm not trying. I want to bring this up because you

talk about the Viagra early on. Did you get spasms in your? No, I wish I did. It would be great. And just pop up out of nowhere. I was like, oh, sorry. I was like, ha ha ha. That would have was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,

I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,

I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like,

I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like Fuck. You know, it's like, it's all mental and confidence. Right.

You know, so you start to slowly learn how to walk again. And then you walk and walk and walk. But I can tell this one was different. But how this leg felt, you know, I'm like, ah, this is a doozy right there. Yeah. ["Doozy"] You talking about boxing, like, you box a lot.

The people that I know who bought, and I did a little bit years and years ago as well. Like the kind of shape that you get in by boxing is a great shape. I mean, the best shape I've been in my life is when I boxed. Exactly. Oh my God. And do you think that because you were in that kind of shape,

that's what got you through the... Yeah, well, yes. But life gets you prepared for everything. You know, the stroke and all that. You have that fighting spirit. Yeah. And you just go, I'm not going down now. Not now.

Not now. Is it gonna improve, do you think? Do they think? Yeah. The doctors. Is it gonna improve, do you think? Do they think? The doctors think it's gonna improve? Well, you know, you just, I don't think about it. Right. Because if you think about it, you can't, but yeah, it's improving anyway.

Right. You know, because I'm on stage now. I was gonna say, when you get on stage, you're like. I'm doing my thing, you know. And stand up is, stand up is actually, even if you're just standing up doing it, I mean, for any length of time, it starts to get tiring.

But that's what it's saying, doing an hour, I was scared when I did my hour. Right. You know, back to back hours. Yeah, because you do a special, you gotta do it twice. Boom, boom, boom. Right. But it worked.

Yeah, it did. Where did you shoot that? Sony Music Hall. Where's that? Well, around, Midtown. So when you get in there from Jersey, you take the tunnel or the bridge? No, what I do, I take the long way,

because I'm cheap. Oh, right, okay. With no toll, less toll. Right, so you go up and around? Yes. All right, okay. Or maybe get a boat? Or get a boat. A ferry. Yeah, get a boat. You'll get a boat.

A ferry. Yeah, get a ferry. I don't take the ferries. You take the ferries. I hate any place that you gotta catch a ferry to go to. I hate. Okay. All those, what's that?

Holland? No. It's in Boston somewhere. Oh, Martha's Vineyard and all that. Oh, I can't stand nothing. I hate Martha's Vineyard. Now, have you ever been to Martha's Vineyard? Yes, that's why I hate it.

Well, why, I just, I didn't see much to hate about it. That's all, they got an ice cream parlor and Barack Obama lives there, I think. I know, but it still bugs me. I think he had a ferry to get to. Shut up. Yeah. You know what?

I don't like, I lived in a place once where you had to take a ferry and they always, the ferries are always breaking down. That's why, you know, when I'm going to Jersey, I take the tunnel. I mean, a lot of people say don't, but I do, I do. Take the tunnel. We should go, especially if you're going to Newark,

to the airport. The noise, the nice noise you to the airport. Take the tunnel from Manhattan. I've moved back to New York after being away for a long time. And I fucking love this city. I love what's happening. Yeah, I'm from Philadelphia. Yeah, that's right. But you moved up here a while ago, right?

Yeah, in 1992 until one and we moved to New York. Right. That's the year I got the... Yeah. So you went up to New York, but Philly, where you grew up in Philly, was it rough? Oh, yeah. It was a rough stop, you know what I mean? Like, you know, we were... But we could leave our doors open, whatever. Cause my mom was that woman, you know?

Yeah. She shot and all that. Really? And that gun, yeah, she shot a guy at a card game. And is this a Western? What's the, she shot a guy in a fucking card game. Your mom shot a guy in a card game? Yeah.

What is, was he, was card game? What is that? Was he cheating? What happened? I don't know what, you know, I was young then, but I was like nine, 10. All right. And next thing I know, we're going to bus, Greyhound bus on the run.

Because your mom's on the run because she shot a guy, didn't die. Yeah, he shot a guy, who cares? Well, you know, that's true. Statute of limitations story. That's not your story. And it had nothing to do with me, no. But we moved to Federal's Bird, Maryland

for about one year. Until the heat comes off and then you're back to killing. And I never forget we had parent and teacher day. And the teacher was like, your son is just, he's not focused. We need him to focus. And mom like, why can't you focus? Mom, because we're on the run.

That's why. How the hell you want me to focus? It'd be very difficult though as a parent, I think to discipline your kids. Cause you can always say, mom, you shot a guy in a car. Like if my mother had said to me, it's time for bed. Oh, is it? Cause you shot a guy.

Hold on, let me make this call real fast. We're in Fessersburg. Yeah, come and get us. So did your mom still play cards? No, she passed away. She passed away, but she stopped playing cards after that? Yes. Yeah, probably for the best.

Well, everybody back in the 70s had a lot of card games. You know, actually I kind of remember that too. People used to come around the house and play cards. Yeah, and gamble. Gamble a little bit, but it was just for like a little bit of money. It wasn't like where we were in Scotland. Actually, I kind of remember that too. People used to come around the house and play cards. Yeah. And gamble a little bit. Gamble a little bit, but it was just for like little bits of money. It wasn't like where we were in Scotland.

Why? For potatoes. It was really for actually potatoes. Like I'll bet you one potato. Well, they had what they call rent parties. So to get your rent or whatever, you had an old game, sold dinners and all that, played a card game.

Everybody was cheating a little bit. But yeah. That's quite a spectacular stuff. My wife has this idea that all comedians have the same mother. Because she and my mother had, they had a relationship. It was, she says, I don't know if this applies to your mom, but she says that all comedians, she says only good stand-up comedians have the same, all good stand-up comedians have the same

all cold with bad boundaries. That's what she says. Now my mom was just like, she shot a guy in a card game. There's nowhere you can fucking go with this, Keith. That's what she says. Now my mom was just like. She shot a guy in a card game. There's no way you can go with this, Keith. It's not like you're going to sell this like, no, my mom was a great mom. She was a sweetheart. Oh my God. How did you end up then getting a stand up from that background? I mean, you know, I would always tell stories. from that background? I mean, you know, I would always tell stories.

Right. Like we lived in the latest Passogue projects. And I always tell stories about the, and let your man behind the TV. And they would have them all laughing and all that. And then when I got older, the older I got, and I kept hearing Richard Pryor. And I, and from listening to Richard,

I'm like, I can't do that. Now I've seen some comics that was awful. Right. I'm like, I can do that. You can do that, yeah. Yeah, I can do that. That's funny.

I mean, when you talk about, I've heard other comedians say this about Richard Pryor, is that's the way I think about Billy, we were talking about. I didn't know if I could do that, but I thought it doesn't look like a good way to live. You know? Hey.

It's not, think of it as that. It's not really. What is the little old man? But when I was a kid, you know, it looked like, oh, everybody's your friend, and you get up, and you talk to them. Then you get further around, and everybody's not your friend. No, they're not your friend.

You're like, ah. But comedy probably saved me from a lot of the bullshit. Yeah. Well, you know, on these streets and all that. I didn't do comedy. Where did you start, on these streets and all that. Yeah. I didn't do comedy. Where did you start doing standup then? Was it in Philadelphia?

Yeah. Where? Was there a club there or something? Comedy Factory Outland. Right. Third and Bank Street. Is it still there? No.

All right. A lot of clubs are gone. There's tons of, it seems to me like there's a lot of that coming back. Yeah. A lot of comedy coming back, a lot of comedy. Coming back again. But it feels like, I don't know if I'm right on this, but I did a couple of drop-ins at the cellar last week and it was fine, I liked doing it, but it was fun.

It was great. Yeah, it was fun, it was a good room. And it was funny, and it was funny, but I'm so used to doing an hour, 90 minutes, like doing that 50 minute slot, kind of like you have to sharpen your sharp. Yeah, you have to sharpen up a little bit more. Yeah.

But then you go back and tell them you want to do the hour in one of the rooms and they'll give you an hour. Oh, right. I don't know if I want to do that. You just said you used to do an hour. Yeah,. I don't know if I wanna do that. You just said you used to do an hour. Yeah, but I don't know if I wanna do it there, because I don't know, am I gonna take the bridge,

am I gonna take the tunnel, how am I gonna get there? I don't know. I don't know if I wanna do that. Also, I feel like it might be- How about a helicopter? A helicopter? I'm fucking taking a helicopter, man, no. I actually, I don't think I'll ever get in a helicopter again.

Yeah, same. Yeah, I... I forget those helicopters. Nah, it's not for me. They're not safe at all. They're not safe, they're not safe. I don't care what anybody says. I don't wanna get in a helicopter.

No, no. Do you know what? Doesn't Bill Burr fly a helicopter? Yeah, I would never get in a damn helicopter. No, with Bill, no. You know, it's just, I'm sure he's a great pilot. Bullshit. Yeah.

You know, I've got a pilot's license. Do you? Yeah, I got it, not for helicopters, but I used to be terrified of flying. So I thought if I learned to fly the plane, I won't be scared. Wow. Here's what happens. I learned how to fly the plane, I won't be scared. Here's what happens. I learned how to fly the plane,

and I'm about 20 minutes from landing in Phoenix one time. And a guy at the back. Don't mention it, Phoenix. A guy at the back takes a Viagra because he's going to meet his girlfriend. And I'm traumatized. I haven't flown since. Every time I hear a feeling, my heart just...

Oh, I know. Really? Like, Chris Rock wanted me to come rain for him. Right. And I was so scared to get on flights. I'm like, eh. Do you get on airplanes now? No, no, no. I'm weird. No, you're okay? Yeah. When I first did, I'm like, oh. Do you get on airplanes now? No, I'm good. Now you're okay?

Yeah. I mean. Well, when I first did, I'm like, oh boy. Where would you have to go to write out to LA? No, he was working on his house. Oh, and the live hour thing? Yes. Yeah.

It's funny, I ran into him when he was doing that. I was doing, we were in the same hotel in Charlotte. Yeah. And the only time Chris. That's where I was going to go, was Charlotte. Charlotte in Charlotte. Yeah. And the only time Chris. That's where I was going to go, was Charlotte. Charlotte, really? Yeah, that's funny. That's funny.

They have a great comedy club down there. Yeah. It was Comedy Zone? Comedy Zone. That's a great club. Amazing. Yeah, that one and I like the, where's that one? Oh, in Denver, they have these really good clubs.

Oh, yes. With David Tell did that, Skanks for the Memories. Oh, in Denver, they have these really good clubs. Oh, yes. David Tell did that Skanks for the Memories. Oh, yeah, yes. I love that. I guess that was an album, really, wasn't it? It wasn't really even a special. Well, David Day, he's great.

Is this his own fucking guy? Yeah, he's just like, you know. Does his own thing. David's timeless, you just love him. I had to, when I heard Skanks for the Memories, I was driving from somewhere in central California to LA and I had to pull over at the side of the road. When he did that thing, I was laughing so hard,

I couldn't actually drive. I had to pull over, it was when he was doing that thing about having this friend who was a midget. Oh yeah. And, oh my God, it just got worse and worse and worse and funnier and funnier and funnier. Is there any time you think, and I think I already know the answer to this anyway, but is there anything you think, I can't really do a joke about that. It's not really anything that's, it's not really.

I mean, when I saw you go up and do this stuff about, even with the stroke and some of the material you were doing, it's so fucking dark, but so fucking hilarious. What do you know? It's what we do. So you process it, right? Yeah, but so fucking hilarious as well. What you don't, is what we do, we. So you process it, right?

Yeah, we dare to do whatever. Yeah. In school, if everything is quiet, you know, coming up, I'm like, ah, how can I start some trouble? Yeah. That's the common thinking. All right, all y'all be quiet. Don't say nothing in the assembly.

When we start to cough, and cough and everybody, goddamn cough, I was thinking, get out of here. And that was, you know. You know, Cicero in ancient Rome said a great thing. I think comedians, anyone in show business should remember. He said, if you want to know who your friends are, start a fight. That's a great fucking thing.

And I feel like a comedian's mind a little bit. You know what I mean? It's like, all right, let's fucking see. We got to do it. Yeah. Yeah, it's a little bit. sometimes I think there's a little bit of, sometimes you maybe shouldn't start a fight cause you're gonna lose. Hey man, sometimes you can't, you know. Also though, I do, I think to the day I die,

I'll be full of admiration for the idea of, I've already had one stroke, but it's 20 minutes to landing and I'm half an hour out of our house and I'm gonna take a fucking Viagra. I think that's the maddest, one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard. It still brings tears to my eyes

when I think about the romantic. It's so romantic. And the fact that they had to like, you know, lift you out of the- That's just fabulous. Thanks so much for coming in, man. It's been really nice to hang with you. I can't tell you how impressed I am with- well, first of all, fact that you know you're the comic that you are but also that you processed this and still turned it into comedy is just fucking outstanding. It's outstanding.

That's right. Got it. Yeah. It's on Netflix man. It's on Netflix. Different strokes. I know. I really think that was quite a wonderful title. I met him by the way, you know, who was the little guy again, Gary? What was his name? What was that little guy, Gary Coleman? Gary Coleman, yeah. I met him, I met him.

He was on the Drew Carey show when I was on. Oh wow. Yeah, he came on. He was, we Drew Carey show when I was on. Oh, wow. Yeah, he came on. He was, I mean, we had an afternoon chatting. I think his folks took all his money, I think. I think that came up, actually. Yeah, I think he mentioned that. Yeah, yeah.

And that's a bad mom. He shoots away at a card game. That's a good mom. Well, I pistol whips one of the other ladies at the drop off. Yeah, for me. Yeah, well, I know. Yeah, that's for you. Yeah, well I know. Yeah. That's for you. Yeah, I suppose.

It's all different moms. You know what though? I think if my mom, if she had had access to a pistol, she met a pistol whip. Yeah. A lot of moms in the seventies at least had a 22. Not where I grew up, but they had, there was more, you know, clubs and knives and stuff. Clubs and knives? What the? Still isn't a lot of guns over there, you know. That's right. Yeah, it's not a lot of guns. Nobody has a... I blame the government for my mom shooting somebody. Wait, why does the government...

Access to guns. That's right, if she didn't have a gun she would have had to use a club of some. What a difference. and With powerful interviews and insider analysis, our shows have connected fans with the heart of women's sports. In just one year, the network has launched 15 shows and built a community united by passion. Podcasts that amplify the voices of women in sports. Thank you for supporting iHeart Women's Sports and our founding sponsors, Elf Beauty, Capital One, and Novartis.

Just open the free iHeart app and search iHeart Women's Sports to listen now. Welcome to Pretty Private with Ebene, the podcast where silence is broken and stories are set free. I'm Ebene and every Tuesday I'll be sharing all new anonymous stories that will challenge your perceptions and give you new insight on the people around you. Every Tuesday make sure you listen to Pretty Private from the Black Effect Podcast Network. Tune in on the iHe you. Every Tuesday, make sure you listen to Pretty Private from the Black Effect Podcast Network. Tune in on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast,

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