Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald - Black Chyna vs. The Kardashians, Johnny Depp Speaks, and Jen Kirkman

Episode Date: April 21, 2022

Black Chyna is suing the Kardashian women, minus Kourtney and Kendall, for $100 million claiming they used their media power to get her show with Rob Kardashian canceled. Was it Kris’ alleged texts messages or Chyna’s restraining order on Rob that got E! to take away Chyna's second season? Comedian Jen Kirkman joins to go deep on the psychological makeup of Johnny Depp and his relationship with Amber. We cover his testimony and whether Jen’s mom may have had an eyewitness account. For years, Jen Kirkman has been written about in the press regarding her many disturbing encounters with comedian Louis CK. She finally shares her story from beginning to end of what happened. Then we discuss our predictions and hopes for Sex and The City’s reboot And Just Like That season 2.  Subscribe on Apple Podcasts to get exclusive Extra Juicy episodes every Friday and get all episodes of Juicy Scoop, ad-free Or get access to Extra Juicy on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/juicyscoop To bring your brand to life in this podcast, email [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Head of McDonald has got the juices scoop. When you're on the road, when you're on the go. Juice is scoop is the show to know. She talks Hollywood tales, her real life, Mr. Sigma's serial data, and serial sister, you'll be addicted and addicted fast to the number one tabloid real life power cat. Listen in, listen all.

And a McDonald. Juicy scoop. Hello and welcome to Juicy scoop. I am wearing my lady lawyer outfit today because there's lots of Juicy, lots of stuff to go over. And then I have the hilarious Jen Kirkman who is going to tell us her account of what she thinks of going on with the Johnny Depp trial as well as her Louis C.K. story that she tells us from beginning to end, totally fascinating, very juicy. Also her predictions of what she'd like to see happen in and just like that, which is the Sex and City remake. So it's a super juicy show. First, let me begin to our first trial.

This is black China versus Kim Kloy, Chris and Kylie. I cannot believe that this is like a full jury trial. It is super juicy. So it's only been since Monday. And first, it started with jury selection. And this one guy, if you've ever been in jury selection, both sides kind of ask you questions to see if they think that you would be okay

and that you could be nonbiased or possibly be good for their side. This one guy was like mid 50s, they asked, are you familiar with the reality show keeping up with the Kardashians or any of those Kardashians? And the guy said, well, I have never watched keeping up with Kardashians, the reality show, Keeping Up with the Kardashians or any of those Kardashians. And the guy said, well, I have never watched Keeping Up with Kardashians, the reality show, but I did watch Kim Kardashian's sex tape. And then more questions went on and he goes, I really just think I need to be excused because

I cannot think about anything but her sex tape, why she sits here in the jury. I mean, as I said here in the jury anyway he did get dismissed they got enough jurors and that night black China's mom who's been very controversial in the past her name's Tokyo Tony and and she has good done a lot of things on Instagram. She went on Instagram live last night saying about how all the Kardashians didn't look good and their filler and their face that had little divots in it that they need to fill. And she also said that Chris Jenner looks like the jigsaw, the puppet from, his name is Jigsaw from Saw.

That is who I've been compared to more times than Caitlyn Jenner. It's been those, Caitlyn Jenner and the Jigsaw puzzle puppet guy is who people think I look the most like. So I find it flattering at this point that Chris is also, I feel like it's anybody that kind of has high cheekbones, and these are my cheekbones they have never been filled. They think I look like that puppet. The puppet did star in the Saw series, and I believe there are seven of them,

so it was a very successful actor. So thank you for that. Anyway, she's crazy. In it, she says, I'm gonna get you judge and says, you know, some negative things saying, oh, they're scary and this is that. So this morning, the judge said, Tokyo Tony can no longer be in the courtroom

because of the threats that she's made towards the judge and towards Kardashians and Christians and feel comfortable. And then Tokyo Tony says, well, I'm a comedian. You know, I do, that's my, I was doing a set. I was doing my comedy set. So forget about our show about cancel house, which by the way, someone sent me something that I think Peer's Morgan is doing a version of cancel house.

Chris Ferenjaro is going to lose his shit. My other thing is getting reality stars to be stand-up comics. That's going to be in the new show. So we can add Tony, what's her name? Tokyo Tony. Farah Abraham. Let's see. Well, Joe Judice is already doing it. Sony or Morgan, she's already kind of doing it. I heard Bethany Franco wants to do it. And I want to say there's like someone else that was trying to do something. Anyway, we've almost got a full house.

Find a cute rental in Chatsworth. And then Chris and I will come in and help these people cultivate their sets. Getting back to the Juiciest trial. OK, so let me get back to it. So right now let me just tell you what the trial basically is. You probably call that Black China and Rob got together, she got pregnant and they got their own reality show. Clearly something I think Black China probably really wanted because right before Black China came into the picture,

Rob had already been very recluse for years, not appeared on the show. He goes, yes, I'll be on the show and love with Black China. Let's do it. She gets pregnant. We see it for one season. We see them fighting. We see her throwing pots and plants, whatever, but then they make up like over a barbecue chicken or something. So now, she is saying that they were all set to do another season and she's going to make all this money. But her attorneys believe that Chris, Kylie, Kim and Chloe use their media power to convince E and the showrunners of the black China and Rob show to not renew it for the second year. And therefore, she's missed out on $40 million and $60 million in future earnings.

So she's suing the Kardashians for $1 million. And her attorneys are saying, we believe this to be true because they alleged that they have some evidence of tax. I assume they've got to show it to say it. I don't know. Saying it was in her opening statement. So China's lawyer is saying that allegedly, Kris Jenner set out to have season two of Robin China canceled, followed by an alleged dispute between Robin China. so they had this supposed fight in december of two thousand sixteen rob said you know they're they're saying rob was physically assaulted there was a phone court wrapped around his neck she was hit with

something in the face china says all i did was uh... bashing a door and break to gingerbread houses the kardashans are very big on sending friends and and break two gingerbread houses. The Kardashians are very big on sending friends and people these beautiful gingerbread houses. But after that dispute, they said that China's lorith claims that Chris then sent a slew of text to the series show on a allegedly calling China stupid, accusing her of being drunk for three days,

describing her as really ghetto, and suggesting that they should ditch a bitch. I really want to see evidence of this because for so many who. No's christianner is texted with christianner and is hung out with christianner that is not. Her vocabulary but anyway during his opening statement the Kardashians lawyer. Michael Rhodes also showed alleged 2017 text from China to Rob, sent just a few months after that split. Remember that was December 2016, so on February 2017.

Rhodes claims that in addition to writing FU, China also allegedly texted its over and called Rob a fat bitch, adding that his disgusting sex is horrible. Rhodes also said that the alleged text came on the very same day that E news executives were still trying to save the show. So he claims that E and the direction company encouraged Robin China to try to work things out and go to a retreat together since he was coming to a close in the deadline option of picking up season two. He also showed alleged text from a but a Murray executive letting

Chris know that they found a retreat to the former for the former couple and stated that the family was on board with pausing the show to save their relationship. So they're saying Chris and everybody was like, yes, go on this retreat like hopefully you'll be together and we continue on with the show. But in this state, we need to put a pause. Well then in July of 2017, Rose noted that China and her then lawyer at the time Lisa Bloom, who's right in the building next door, filed a temporary restraining order against Rob, which meant they could no longer be in the same room. This, as Rhodes explained, came

shortly before the official deadline for the show's second season in August. So if a restraining order is issued in July, and the executives are sitting around and saying, should we renew season two of Rob and China about a couple in love? That's supposed to be funny. And so obviously that would give people them to go, maybe not. So right before their trial was that, oh, we saw that part about China. So that's basically where we're at. And so that's where it's at. It's like she, Black China is saying, no, that you got it

canceled. And they also said in another article, red, the Kardashians attorney said that he paid The Kardashians attorney said that he paid China $100,000 for a like a quit fee. Like they must have been an offer, they must be an option in the contract that says, and if we choose to end it, you will still get $100,000, even though we're not going to film the second season. That's what I'm guessing. And they already had paid her like $300,000 for the first season and then another 100 when the show ended. China is saying that they then said, cancel the show, that the lady said cancel the show,

the Kardashians, because we don't think it's good for Rob and we don't like China and we want, instead we will give, keeping up with Kylie or when Kylie had her one show for that, life of Kylie, she had a season with Jordan Woods, her former best friend, where they just kind of like did fun things, they went to some proms and did some charity work and she did something really nice for her friend of mine's daughter. They did that show and that only ran one season two. So Black China is claiming that they made that happen and thus screwed her out of all this money she would have been the biggest reality star ever, according to Tokyo, Tony, your mother. She was going to put the real back in reality TV.

I mean, I think this is going to be a juicy thing to see because yes, I would think they would have tried to settle, but the same time the fact, just like Johnny Depp that all of them are there every day in court, I think they really want to get what they believe their truth is out. It's crazy, their daughter is five. Oh, also in one of the houses that they were at it was Kylie had given the house for Robin China to live in and she completely decorated it with Christmas decorations and stuff and then the horrible fight happened.

She'd even decorated a nursery for dream. This is before Kylie was a mom because Stormy's only four and it seemed like they were really trying and I even remember when they were first got together how Chris said I I love that China's with my son Rod. He is out. He's happy. He's going to this deli This is wonderful So I actually think they were really encouraging in my opinion To this relationship when it began, but we all saw how destructive and awful it got. And we all saw when she moved out and he walked around with his camera and he was on Instagram and he's, you know, saying,

I can't believe everything is gone. And people were joking that it was like the Grinch who stole Christmas, like they did memes of black China, like a Grinch, like taking all the gifts and all the baby. So he was pretty heartbroken. And then, yeah, did she, I don't know, listen, it wasn't a relationship to last a lifetime or even a second season of a reality show.

But apparently the her lawyers would not be going this far unless they feel that they have some real evidence to sway a jury into believing to their side. So super juicy with that. On Potomac news, Ashley Darby has announced that she and her husband Michael Darby are separated. If you're not familiar with this reality show, this couple, it was such a mismatch. They were about twenty five years apart he is this older white australian guy she's this beautiful black girl

and they had two little boys close and age and he was uh... she admitted that they that she was bisexual that they were swingers we're not swingers but they bring in like an extra girls sometimes uh... there was uh... there was a legend things where he was pursuing guys on the side. He was obsessed with Robin Dixon's husband, Juan, obsessed with him. He was accused of grabbing the ass of a cameraman. Then he got caught with a stripper in a hotel room, though he said they just talked and

took a nap. Anyway, it came out yesterday. They're currently filming, so I'm sure it'll be part of the season that we see. She's a very cute girl. Everyone's very happy to see her move on. There is a big back history to some stuff I heard about them that'll be on Patreon. So go ahead and have them with you all in that that'll be on Patreon. So go to Heather McTall and hunt net and click on Patreon join that change life. Now from my very juicy interview with Jen we go a little bit deeper into some of the

Johnny Dept trial stuff. A couple things that came up that I didn't talk about with Jen that I just want to say that I just read about is we did hear the story about the fecal matter. The fecal matter story between Johnny Depp and Amber heard is that they were fighting and he was going to go back to the house to pick up some things and his security said, I don't think it's a good idea that come here right now. We found something under the covers that's very disturbing. And there was a pretty decent size shit in the middle of where he would normally sleep in the bed and they'd covered it with a blanket like so he could just crawl in there and get snuggly and

there'd be a poo waiting for him. Amber has sent said I did not do that it must have been one of our little Yorkies but according to people that are big on your keys and they've looked at the evidence they said the poo was too large for a yorky poo i don't know he and recalling the story on the stand kind of chuckled about it i you know this is one of many weird things that he went through with her um... he also said when he got married that his daughter who was fifteen at the time she's twenty two now lily rose did not want to come to the wedding she She did not get along with Amber at all. The thing, the whole thing about the finger, they share the audio from the fact that I guess he was taping her or she was taping him, that there's audio of her talking about, well, what about the how he cut his finger? He got into that about

the body, but then there's another audio about how she said, don't be such a baby. I didn't punch you and he said, yes, you did. And she goes, no, I was hitting you. I wasn't punching you. That's on audio. And so he is on. And it's all about the abuse that he suffered at the hands of Amber, not what she claimed, where she was a victim of him. So, oh, and then the last thing was, is when she said at one point she was hitting him, and so he had to hold her like in a bear hug. And then she said to him, you broke my nose and she brought out this tissue that had what he thought had blood on it. And he goes, what, what do you mean? I didn't mean to, what's going on? And he went into the bathroom,

he says this on the stand, and he found the tissue that she was holding and it had to red nail polish on it. So this is just, I'm sure he's going to do another day tomorrow. Jen and I go a little bit more about the psychologically of their psychology, their relationship and his childhood, and then the Louis CK story, and then some sex in the city. So we still have a huge show.

Here we go with Jen Kirkman. Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop. I'm here with a very good friend that I've had for a long time. She's on the East Coast, comedian, podcaster, author, TV writer, Jen Kirkman. Welcome to JuicyScope. Heather, I've missed you. Thank you for having me. I didn't realize you did Zoom ones.

I'm sure you don't want too many people doing it. It's probably annoying. So I would have totally, although no, my schedule wouldn't permit. I was going to say I should have totally jumped on and zoomed with you about Sex and the City too, but anyway, I'm so glad I can be working today. I want to ask about that, but we have a lot to cover. Yeah, there's a lot to cover. We are going to get into the biggest thing that's going on.

You have a direct connection to our boy, Johnny Dapp. I do. Yes, through here. Through so very close to you. Oh, Johnny Depp. I do. Yes, through here. Through some very close to you. Oh, that's right. Yes. OK, so I just checked the latest on it. I was just watching before we came on.

And it was so, it was like, it was like God intervened because they just went on a lunch break. And I saw the last, I just watched the last of Johnny's testimony right before I logged on with you. So I did catch everybody up on Tuesday show. So now Johnny is on a second day of testimony and what we covered yesterday was just really an assist or testify to this too, which is really interesting is they set the stage for what his childhood was like, besides being raised as a Southern gentleman in which he says, I've never touched a woman,

hit a woman, never ever, which is what the lawsuit is about. He's suing her for $50 million because she wrote this article saying she was a victim of domestic abuse and he feels that's why he can no longer get work and she's countersuing him for a hundred million. So we're in court and he establishes the fact that his mother was verbally and physically

abusive. His father never fought back with his mother and the father finally when Johnny was 15 said I can't take it anymore moved out left. But what was also interesting is that he still had a great love for his mother because he said, when Amber and I got married she had about three months to live and we wanted to make sure that we had the actual like real or you know legal ceremony in her presence at her home and then we had the big fancy wedding I guess in the Bahamas where he has this island. So that shows a lot that he's still,

but it's very interesting to me because so, I was just talking about this with my son, like so many people marry their mother or marry their father or have a similar dynamic in their own marriage as the one that they witnessed in their home. And sometimes it can be very positive, sometimes it can be quirky or funny, and then sometimes it can be really bad.

So I am really a student of psychology, I mean, not literally not going to say it. Yeah, but I'm obsessed with this kind of thing, and I do have some experience in, let's just say, my family, nothing happened to me, but others out, you know, in my family. And with someone who's abused, they will always side with the abuse or that's a very common thing with kids,

is because like you can't see your parents as bad. It'll, like your brain won't let you. So you have to have all the sympathy for them. And he probably, so whatever he did to sue himself and I've been reading, he started taking his mom's nerve pills when he was 11. And it's funny because I do remember him talking on talk shows about how much he loved.

His mother, the single mom, the waitress. And so I always thought, oh, his mom was a single mom because the dad was a jerk and he left. And it's like he left because he was abused. So this all makes sense that it's very believable that he was abused because when he said, when he first met Amber Heard and they kissed on set, he said, I felt something I shouldn't have been feeling.

Like there was an attraction between them. That can be sometimes like a traumatic thing in his DNA going off, like that feels so intense. He doesn't even have to know that Amber Heard was going to eventually abuse him. Like some primal thing was going off. It's like part of the attraction. So I think this all lines up.

This is my armchair psychology degree. But I think it is so, and even I'm looking on Twitter and victims of this kind of thing are saying the way he's talking is how a victim and someone with PTSD talks like he's having trouble He doesn't want to feel the feelings that come up remembering it and he's really ashamed and I think I mean I Completely believe him. I I mean, I definitely believe what everything he's saying on the stand is true And you know in his recollection and he says,

you know, I stayed longer than I should because she also said that she was suicidal, something that my mother would do and the dramatic of it all. And then he gets into the drug use. And look, we all knew that he had a problem with drugs and alcohol. And well, he claims he does, it wasn't really alcohol,

but he was a practicing pirate for many years. So clearly, he's gonna like a booze, he, not. What does he mean is he's gonna alcohol? He's spent like 30 grand a month on wine. That was a story that was out like years ago. We didn't know how to tell him. Yeah, but he's kind of saying though, like, well, I wasn't, you know, I wouldn't pass,

I wasn't drinking where I'd throw throw up i would pass out because of these of the met you know of these pills and talks about the opiates and yesy a obviously had an issue with both of it you know um... but you know he's also fun and she also he said every time he came home it was interesting when he the way he's recollect of what we calling like the beginning part of their relationship. As you said, they were working on this movie. He was still in his 14 year relationship

with the mother of his children, Vanessa. And they had a love scene where they make out and there was a real chemistry there. And he said at the time, I was with Vanessa, she was with her wife. She's been bisexual and had really just a men and women. Then she came back to a trailer that night and they made out again. Yeah. And and then that was it. I kind of don't know if that's true, but anyway,

who knows. So then she leaves and then we really didn't talk again until press two years later. And then by that time, I guess they were both available to pursue it. And then he goes, and when it first started, it was amazing. I'd come home from a long day of shooting something and she would bring me a glass of wine and she would remove my boots. You know, I'm just imagining like the pirates of the Caribbean boots like. So dirty and smelly. Yes.

And so he goes, and then one time I came home and she was doing something, she was on the phone or something. So I sat down and I took off my own boots and she came over angry and said, what are you doing? That's my job. I thought that was just so manipulative and weird and such a sign that men and women do when they love bomb and, you know, and then all of a sudden it changes, you know, like, oh, my God, I came home to flowers and wine and this and that. when they love bomb and you know and then all of a sudden it changes you know like oh my god

I came home to flowers and wine and this and that and then it's like this and especially with a girl that's kind of trying to become like a chameleon that that he falls in love with like her assistant said oh he she was dressing like him she wanted her apartment to look bohemian she got rid of her paper books and was trying to curate a beautiful hardcover, first edition, you know, great stuff of literature that he bought her. And like, just that whole thing that people do, that all of a sudden you're like, oh my god, I love red vines. He loves red vines. For perfect fruits. I mean, like, yes, it just reminds me of like, yeah, like, I'm not, I don't really love true crime. It freaks me out, but I do know the dirty John's story.

And you think of like, this guy was like homeless in a trailer, a drug addict pretending to be a doctor, but he was so good to hurt first. And then the minute that person commits that you're love bombing, they turn. And this happened to a friend of mine, like in a relationship with someone for a year,

and then once she was like, okay, I'm in love with you, let's do this, he became a crazy psycho. And it's like, you can't believe it's happening at first. You're like, maybe, I don't know. Like, I think it takes a long time to realize this is them and they're not going through something and who knows, but it's amazing. They find the right victim though

that we'll put up with it. Well, also the beginning of it is so fantastic and something that you've never experienced with any other relationship that you chase it. You're like, well we were here once. There's got to be a way to get back to that incredible time of taking off my boots and serving me wine versus her saying to him, who would ever want you in a deorad, your a fatal man, and you and your friends

are boring playing guitar. Like, where did that go? And I think that's where he was just like, what is happening? And then again, struggling with getting off the opiates and all that is what I think he's trying to display on the stand. Now I will say this because I get more shit

from my fans than anyone gets from their fans. Like my fans hate me and I know your fans want to do this to me but mine will probably tune in and I can hear it now. You speak out against all these abusers and I can't believe you just because you think he's cute. You think I'm like no I thought that he was the abuser at first totally believed it. Then I know people that know her.

I know it's all hearsay, but that she's been a little problematic in life before this kind of verbal abuser in relationships. Now, again, hearsay. Now, again, people will say, well, what about their therapist? This says there was mutual abuse. I don't think that was a very good wording on her part. There is a thing when you're a victim where you will fucking snap and you might throw something back and like, yes, drugs,

who knows what can happen when you're under the influence. But he's been on drugs and drinking the whole life and his other partners say he didn't do this. Now we do know that he trashed a hotel room with Kate Moss. I don't know if there was violence towards each other or they're just high and trashing things because I thought it was funny. Like, I don't know. But I'm just

here to say I support the fact that men get me abused by women. I think that's very important and it does sound like he was abused. I don't think it was mutual like sit and Nancy they're beating each other up. But I will I'm not trying to sound like anti-woman. I just think this is one of those cases where She might be a sociopath so everyone can send me hate mail and Goodbye Okay now in her defense. He said on the stand today. He said, you know, he's trying to get off these opiate drugs

opiates drugs my son saying right and Through this doctor doctor Dr. Kipler, who also I mentioned treated Ozzy Osborne and Ozzy in the end said he wasn't happy with the treatment, but whatever. So, you know, and it's a form of different medications to wean you off of the pain that happens when you try to get off of these very addictive pain killers.

And so he said it's 2.30 and he's like, can you please give me my meds to Amber? And she's like, no, it's not 4 o'clock yet. Like that's not 4 o'clock. And so then he goes on to say, you know, how awful it was and it gets in great detail of coming off these drugs. And as someone who has never been addicted to drugs or alcohol, it is definitely something I never want to experience. It's a good lesson for people to watch this and be very careful with it because it does sound hell painful. But in her defense, like, okay, the doctor said four o'clock. Like, if I give it to a two thirty, is tomorrow you're going to ask for it to,

like, are we going backwards? She's not a medical doctor, she's not an addiction expert. She's trying to be the good partner. I mean, that would be my defense if I was her. Like, yeah, does this sound like it was a fun weekend in the Bahamas? No, it wasn't, you know? Of course, yeah. Of course, yeah.

Yeah, so I mean, I kind of was, because I do feel like right now it's like, definitely, I mean, the fans are lined up. There's people dressed like some of his favorite characters. I said, no one's Jack Sparrow, but there are like some 17-year-old kids that dress like, what's the vagus one? Oh, leaving Las Vegas.

Not leaving the room diary? No, where he has the glasses. He's like 70s and drugs. yes, I don't know about drugs. I never loved that movie by the way. But wait, why is Noondress's Captain Jack the most fun one? I don't know, they just said there's no, according to I think Page Six they haven't, they just said there's other people dressed up as things and people have spent money to get there and their fans outside and their fans waiting.

That's a little crazy. things and people have spent money to get there and their fans outside and their friends waiting crazy yes and uh... anyone dressed like s's or hands that with scissors for hands wearing leather uh... i also predict that s-t-l will probably i don't know if s-t-l will mock this because the subject is so serious yeah but if i was on s-tL, I'd be pitching that we do the trial and in the back are Scissor hands, Captain Jack, Benny and June, 21 Jump Street, just like,

this is like all the people like, and with like no pads, like acting very serious, but they're in these costumes. That would be amazing. I think the funniest thing is, this is different than other trials I've seen where the lawyer asks you a question and they just let you keep talking Like so they'll be like how did you meet Amber heard and he starts with the meeting he had with hunter s Thompson to make a movie of his book the rum diaries

I can then you commit suicide and then well then he was going to be found director, who he did so he never wanted to direct again, but he really loved the project. And so, and then he just, I'm like, they asked how you met. Like, clearly the answer is she auditioned for the movie. But he goes into these like long things, and then he was like, I tuned in to the trial, like in the middle of it.

And the first thing I saw was he was like, coming up with the character of Jack Sparrow was like, it's like a soup, it's a little bit Keith Richards, it's a little bit Pepe Le Pue. His brain has scrambled from being in the sun. And yeah, and I'm like, what are they asking him? Like, he is just like a master class in how movies are made.

I love it. Well, the way I understand it from not being a lawyer is that in this particular type of a case, because it's not like a murder trial, he is getting questioned by his own attorney. And so she's allowing him to go on and on and on and on and not saying, hey, get to the point, like a prosecutor would with like a murder person.

And so, and they're just sitting back taking notes, Amber's people so that they can combat what he has said. But so right now, like he can ramble, and I think they realize that it's up to the jury to, for the jury to decide, does he get money, does she get money, does no one get money? So I think the more that they can show him being telling his story of like what he's been through from drug rehab, from being a delight on set, to his relationships, to his true love that he had for Amber, calling her misheard, showing the pain that he has when he's like, again, sort of, trying to protect

her in certain situations. Oh, and I hate to reveal this part of the story, but, you know, she was just chopping some carrots or doing something in the kitchen. I said, man, please, please have my meds now. And it's like this law and we're seeing true theater. Like it's like, so that's what's gonna, you want them to be on your side. So she's attorneys like. That makes sense. Also,'m going to say a little something and people may or may

not like it. I've noticed a little flirty between him and the brunette attorney. Oh, I haven't. Oh, I'm going to have a very pretty brunette for attorney. I'm not saying they're having an affair or anything. I'm just saying something was to happen yeah a year and a half from now i would not be surprised he's he of course is a southern gentleman so he's he's offering her a mint he's laughing with her he always makes sure that he gets out first from the car and holds and let's the ladies out he's the one that shuts the door not the security guard not the driver uh... i think that is a natural thing.

There are certain men that are just raised that way and they just do it. It's just automatic, which I love. But there is a little of that. Okay. So how old is she though? She looks like she's like, I mean, from what I've seen, I've heard just sitting next to him. He has a few attorneys.

He has the male attorney and then this girl, I don't think she looks older than 40, in my opinion. Okay, well, because it could be good for him, someone who's nice, but you know, as Chris Fangella says, and he says he says this, and I'm like, I'm sure I said this first, because it's something I would say. He's like, the problem is,

when you're in your 50s, dating someone in their 20s, like, you're not, and I'm like, Chris is like, as I always say, and I texted him like, well, I think you got that from sitting next to me for 10 years at a job, but okay, but I'm like, you're right, you want a nice 47 year old, you're on 47,

I'm barely interested in dating, I'm not dating, I won't give you any problems, I'm not possessive, I'll be podcasting in the kitchen most of the day, we'll have some wine at night, we'll catch up, and then just go about your life. I'm so tired, I got no problems to give anyone, and I'm still 11 years younger than him. I'm not wanting to be with him, but I'm just saying these famous 50-year-olds who think they got to go 20? Well, yeah, I mean, that's the thing. And on top of it, a bisexual a bisexual woman okay bisexuals come out me i don't think it's great to marry someone

if you are uh... if you want a monogamous relationship and you're a heterosexual i don't think it's a wise thing to get with someone who has had a long-term relationships with the same sex i think you are that's already got a strike against you for a long term situation. I disagree now.

You don't have to marry bisexual, but I have friends who are bisexual married the opposite gender that they are and literally been married longer than I ever made it. So it's like, you never know. But to me, I don't see, and then on top of it, I don't see Amber's bisexual. Let's be honest. I do think Amber is more gay, because I don't see it. And then on top of it, I don't see it. But I don't see Amber as bisexual, let's be honest.

I do think Amber is more gay, because I don't think she, I don't know what men she was with before Johnny Mutt saying he was the first. But what do you think, Ironic? Do you think she does pursued Elon Musk because she's like, she's social climbing, so she got Johnny Depp, she got a famous actor.

Now let me get like the richest man on earth. Like, you know, like let me just keep going up the ladder because we know that she... Well, that's a problem. Yeah. I mean, it's ironic. It's not like she cheated on him with a woman. James Franco Elon Musk.

It's like, she's like, really? I mean, that Elon Musk, like, how just, ugh, like, you're cheap, ugh, so gross anyway. Well, I,. Anyway, go. I mean, I just think she's one of those girls that very much knows how to hook a guy, a sexually probably great in the sack, probably really knows how to hook them in,

how to tie them in, like just like a black widow, Venus flytrap vagina. I don't know whatever you want to call it, but she's got it. And she, the other thing I didn't mention the other day when I was going deep into her assistance testimonies, she said she would make me go out and buy all the tabloids and all the places where she'd been photographed, which was more popular seven years ago.

And she'd say, hide them in the garage,'t let johnny no that i care about that's that we buy these things because he was being that he got famous at twenty one or whatever he was not a fan of the paparazzi and he didn't like that and he wanted to have a private life why he bought the island and so he was not one that loved that you know and so he wouldn't she knows he would have been turned off if he knew that he all she also i think pretended to be a lot more maternal

uh... i think she presented herself like i'm gonna be this super great step mom super inter kids oh my god i want to give all my money to children's hospital which you never did the seven million oh she did not they could only find that she gave one donation of two hundred fifty thousand and the assistant also said she would cancel all her Volunteering hours like she would sit with set to do it on three occasions all three occasions she canceled

I mean I would do it. So I mean again pursuing Percenting yourself like your mother Teresa when you're clearly not you're not in you know you weren't What is wrong with him that he's like oh good good I found a woman who dresses just like me like what You know does that a red flag or just like a turn off at least I don't think he I think when he found her he liked her for her I think she started to morph into him. Oh okay. So or thinking or thinking that's what would would hook him even more. Um, but. But let me get into the strong connection that you have towards the real Johnny Depp.

One step. We'll just have to make a note. That's okay, just make a note of this. Okay. I just had to pour myself more coffee, sorry. My real life connection to Johnny Depp, yes. OK. Why don't you just start right there,

the real life connection that you have to him? Well, my mom is a big Johnny Depp. I just saw her this weekend. We celebrated her 84th birthday. And my mom and dad, they go to the Foxwoods Casino in Connecticut every weekend. And it's not just about the gambling for them. They get free tickets to every show there and there's it's not

hokey they've got like rock bands that play they've gone to see smashing pumpkins they've seen my mom sees ringo stars band play all the time she's a big fan of that she's seen Alicia Keys get right to the Johnny Depp now you're as bad as Johnny Depp on the stand that's right to the johnny depth she has seen johnny depth's band the hollywood vampires multiple times at foxwoods and i this is in the last ten years she is a big fan okay and she's always like he is so cute he's in it so right after the first breaking news years ago when amber herds that he abused me i was so disappointed because i've always been a huge fan of his. And I felt like I'm sure it's true, you know, these guys.

And so let me just interrupt. Yeah. I think because of your strong resemblance to Winona Ryder that you also felt that at one time you could be in a relationship with Johnny. No, I don't see myself that way. I wish, but maybe now. Okay. You know, we're not in this heyday.

So, anyway, continue. So you're, so, when the story broke, yeah, go on. When the story broke, I told my mom and she said, oh, it's terrible. And then she still continued to go see the Hollywood vampires play a couple of months later. And I said, mom, if you were in the public eye, you'd be canceled for such behavior, you know, supporting this abuser. And she

said, Jennifer, I don't believe the story because, you know, he was playing and he was sort of hanging his head down. And I said, that's what all guys do with long hair and they play guitar. No, Jennifer, it wasn't the way he was playing. He looked ashamed. Like, it was different than the other times I've seen the band where he's smiling and laughing and looking at the audience. He just had his head down like he felt like he had a secret. And I said, well, maybe the secret is that he's abusing someone and he said, no, no, he looked sad. I think there's more to the story. And my mom gives everyone the benefit of

the doubt. So I just went, no, no, no. But my mom called it that she could see the shame and that he was hiding something and keeping it secret. Well, hiding a secret. But it was because that was after the story came out. Did she see him change when he was with her throughout the years being with her? No, she said that during the shows normally he was very, you know, like he was having fun with the band and they'd be like whispering things to each other and laughing. And you know, when musicians think it's funny that they play a note and they like look at each other on stage.

They're doing that kind of thing, but she said after the abuse allegations came out, he seems sort of off to the side and just kind of like sat. And so, well, I can see why, I actually can see why your mom was not called to the stand, because now I don't think that's that great of testimony for Johnny's side. Well, I thought if it was that he is demeanor change while he was in the thick of his relationship with her, but we didn't know that they were going to break up. We didn't know. And I was saying,

he was playing during that. That's the thing. Right. He might, I think, but she also said, she's a bit, I just, this is just a plug. They're not paying me to say this, but so vage by deor, the perfume he wears. Man, that smells good.

My dad, I was like, Dad, you smell real good. This is at Christmas. And he's never worn Cologne in his life. And he goes, it just mum bought it for me. And I said, what is it? It's because it's a Johnny Depp Cologne. I bought it so he'd smell like him.

And it does smell great. So, I mean, It's unfortunate, though, that your mom couldn't get on the jury. Because I would definitely pick her to be on the jury. I just don't think I'd pick her to be an eyewitness. She doesn't need to be, and then this weekend, I said, Mom, you know you were to be an eyewitness. She doesn't need to be, well, and then this weekend I said, Mom, you know, you were proven right.

And she goes, Oh, it's funny. You say that I'm stent and it changed my mind and think, I think you did it. I go, Why do you think that? And she goes, It's just going on so long. I go, That's not a reason to, it's not his fault it's going on so long. She keeps suing him.

And he's like finally speaking. And she goes, I don't know. It's like a little too much, you know? Like, you know, they fired him from all the movies. I go, but that doesn't mean he did it. And she goes, and maybe you're right. All right. All right. I just was trying to like be more thoughtful about it.

So who knows where she's at right now. OK. So I want to tell you my prediction of how it ends and my prediction changes all the time, just like your mother's. OK. OK. I think the jury, because it's it's simultaneously, like the case is simultaneously, like, you know.

So I think that they are going to sign in his favor, but they are only going to make her give back half of the seven million so i think she will be have to pay four point five million dollars to him and that's it and and the fifty million that he's suing for will not have the the fifty million what you will only be awarded four point five and isn't he's doing the tabloids or was that the other party lost that that was a new case he That was in the UK and he lost. He's suing her personally.

Yes, and he gets. Yeah, you know, and she will obviously be awarded nothing, but she will have to pay 4.5 million. That is my prediction. I think that's a good prediction. I haven't thought about it. I'll just say, yeah, you're right. I do think that, even if she did do it,

yeah, I think there's just a hesitancy to make a woman pay out the ass to a guy that isn't perfect, like he has drug problem, you know, whatever. Okay, good point. And so I think that like people don't want to do that. And so I think you're right, like if she pays anything, it'll be like this half what he, you know what I mean?

Like no way is she ever gonna be on the hook for fifty million or even ten million i think you're right yet he's not perfect they also brought up text messages that he has you said about women in the past using you know fat ugly horror and the c-want to work and gold digger and shrew and all of that and then he's like yes my and he in response to that, he said, well, my texts are colorful. And I write my texts like, you know, literature, great, something, I don't, it sounded like a bullshit thing. He definitely has a temper.

He don't. I also want to say I said something wrong on Tuesday show about the severed finger. He went to the hospital, he said I cut it myself. But there, I guess there is audio to Amber kind of confirming his story that she threw not one but two vodka bottles and one of the broken bottles did slice off the top

of his finger somehow. And by him I cut it off. It was just like an abuse victim who lies when they get to the doctor because he didn't want her to be arrested. So he was like, let me just say I accidentally cut off the top, like the tip. And so, you know, I kind of missed said that last time. But anyway, we're gonna keep watching.

Yeah, really quick. I do have a real life when I'm in a writer's story where she did tell me he was very sweet. I mean, that's really it. Okay, let's hear that. Basically, just like I met her because I did a drunk history episode and she was the famous person that did the lip syncing. And oddly, she came to,

I didn't meet her at all during the filming process because I don't have to be part of it, but she came to the premiere party of that episode, which is really weird because no celebrities ever do. And she came by herself. I mean, she had like an assistant person that was kind of like, secret service style, like kind of off in the distance.

And she didn't know anyone, so she went straight to the bathroom and I was in the bathroom and She opened the door and she goes hi, and I was like, oh my god, hi And we'd never met but she knew me from Watching the video of me being drunk and she gave me a big hug And she said she really got into character as this person that we were talking about. And she did so, but she also wanted to get into the character of me, like learning how I talk.

So she read my books and one of my books talks about like having a crush on Johnny Depp and I was so embarrassed that that's the one she read. And I was like, you read my book and she's like, I loved it. And you know, I don't have kids either. And like we hung out all night. We smoked cigarettes together. We held hands. She lives to hold hands.

She had a boyfriend. It wasn't like a gay thing. And we sat at the table, this table together, and then we went out to a bar after. But anyway, at one point I said, I'm so embarrassed. You're the book. And I say, I have a crush on Johnny Depp. And that's a real person. You know, that was like your boyfriend.

I'm so embarrassed. And she just took my hand across the table and she was like, no, and she's like, oh, he's so sweet. He's so sweet, she said. Like, wistfully, just like, oh. They dress, he dressed the tattoo of, he said, because they said, now what about when Amber made fun

of your tattoo or said, that's an ugly tattoo? He said, well, I would never be upset about that because it's like someone saying, pointing out an entry in your journal. I see my body as a journal and I tattoo moments in my life. So I wouldn't change a tattoo. And he's like, well, actually, I take that back. I did have a window and a writer tattoo and I changed it to Winno forever because that's humor and through paying you got to see the funny, you know, whatever. But that's

great. I'm glad you had fun with Winona writer and I'm glad you didn't steal anything from you. Sorry. I didn't have anything expensive enough to steal. Well good. Good. I'm glad. I'll never forget that saxophone avenue moment. That was such a when she was on camera taking stuff. That was from an after. That was after Johnny Depp, wasn't it? Oh way after. That was when she was hanging out with Courtney Love. So I think there's. Yeah. That was an great influence. It wasn't a good time. Yeah. Let I also want to ask you about a very juicy story of Louis CK. Yeah, you have fought the story, the press, the fans. So I'm just going to let you tell it in your own words as a female comic. Do you want me to tell my story of like all the time? I want you to

tell the whole story, the backlash, when it rose up, when you're like, stop calling me about it, and then you're finally like, okay, I will talk about it. It's been a lot of back and forth. It's been a lot. Okay, so basically, and I remember you mentioning it when we were

about the Chelsea lately days, and I couldn't really remember the story, but in the Chelsea lately days, there was no evidence out there to the public that louis ck would hit on girls whip out his dick and masturbate without their permission or with their permission or both

yeah there was none of that out there so go ahead that's right i met louis in the late nineties in new york city when i was just a young thing twenty three years old he wasn't famous but he wrote on the Conan O'Brien show and he did stand up. In the stand up, he did was nothing like what he does now, personal.

It was all absurd jokes. And my boyfriend at the time was a really big fan of his. And so he's like, let's go see this guy, Louis. And I was like, it's not really for me, but OK. And I knew everyone worshiped him. And we both did a voiceover on this cartoon show that filmed in Boston. And my friend, Brendan, was the guy who created the show.

And he cast both of us in it. So I really had never met Louis, maybe just around at comedy shows, high-bye, nothing really. I really didn't look up to him at all. I didn't give a shit. He wasn't my kind of comic. I was more of like a Mark Marin fan at that point like someone who talks about their life. So, but Louis and I are on the same flight like a little

delta from New York to Boston 45 minutes and we're seated next to each other. And he seemed like such a grown-up like he was ignoring me and reading the newspaper. This was really 1999 and I feel like flights were so much nicer than and he was drinking coffee and orange juice and he just literally ignored me the whole flight and I remember thinking, God, of course he's ignoring me. He's in his early 30s and he's very successful.

He's a writer and I'm just this open mic comic just starting out and this is how you're supposed to treat, you know, younger people and this makes sense. Okay, I wasn't offended, but that's what I thought. And at this time, he was married, right? I forget if he was married, but I don't remember. I don't know if he had things yet. Yeah, okay.

So we get off the plane and I just, I don't remember me again so long ago, but I think I was going to probably just get it. There was no Uber or phones or anything. I think I was going to just get a cab at the airport and that was going to drive me to the part of Boston that this little filming was in. And Louis and I grew up, he grew up in Brookline, Massachusetts. I grew up in a town called Needham right next door to each other.

He's older than me we never met, but both Boston people. So at the airport, he says, first time he spoke to me, he says, hey, we're both going to the same place. I rented a car. Do you want to ride? And I said, oh, that'd be great. So I get in the car and we're driving through his hometown on the way to this recording studio. And he says, I grew up here and I said, oh my God, I grew up like a town over.

And I want to start talking about, you know, things you talked to someone about when you're from the same town. And he goes, that house right there, oh my God, the woman that lived there, the girl that lived there, she had these big tits. And I would sit in my room and masturbate and think about them. He's like, but then one time I got to see them, he's like, that house over there. I mean, I don't remember the details, but he was pointing out in that park over there, I got my first blowjob. It was stuff like that.

Interesting. He was telling me, I think it was even weirder than I got my first blowjob, and it made, don't quote me, but it was more like, here are thoughts that I thought over here. You know, I was in that park masturbating thinking about someone. I'm gonna interrupt you right now if I find that so fascinating.

Because the more we learn about grooming, whether it's among between, you know, age-appropriate adults, whether it's consenting or not, or even with children, oftentimes with children, you hear that the perpetrator starts to show them dirty magazines or starts talking about sex or let's them see porn and it's like don't tell your parents that you watch this with me

because you're gonna get in trouble for watching it. That's like a very common thing that like a priest and teachers and coaches would do to boys. Yeah. And so then they're like, well, I don't want to, you know, I'm going to get in trouble. Like, so it's, but it's putting those sexual thoughts out there.

So continue, go on. I absolutely didn't think it at the time, but looking back, I go, oh, he was grooming me or just trying to see what he could do. And your response, like if you would have been like, right away, if you would have been like, not rolling with it and being like, I'm sorry, that's offensive.

Could you please stop your grossing me out? You would have never said another thing. But because you were being the polite, fun, comedian, cool girl, you got a free ride, you're like, ha, ha, ha. I was just sort of like, yeah. I don't know what this is, but I guess, I mean, this happened to me in college when there was like a professor

that was sexually harassing everybody. And he sort of did with me, we got him fired. It was weird, because I wasn't like a stranger to this kind of thing. I'd already had something like this happen and got someone fired for it. Like while these women stood up and told their stories. But again, it, like, the credits of one weird thing with one man really don't transfer

to the next. I'm sitting here going, well, I'm a comedian and, you know, this is, I guess, how comedians talk and he probably would say this to a guy, you know, it's right. I thought it was a one of the guys things. Right. I didn't think it was woman specific. Whereas with my acting teacher, definitely was. But I was like, oh, maybe this is how theater people

are they touch each other. Right. So this felt like something different. And so I didn't like it though. It certainly wasn't in. At the very least, it just wasn't that interesting or cool. I would have rather talked about like funny stories about like people we went to school with, whatever.

So I don't remember anything else. Like, I don't know, we did the voiceover, I don't remember the flight home, who knows. But now he's like someone in my orbit. And again, really, I don't, there's no memories until we get to LA. And I moved to LA in 2002. And then Louis there, and we're on this show at the M bar, which is in a strip mall in Hollywood. And this is before there was an upright citizens brigade theater, so it was kind of like

the alternative night or whatever. And I would try to get on that show, but it was like kind of hard to get on. You had to be like cool and you know, I was in that world world, I was younger. And but I hung out there every Tuesday night and watched the shows. And I watched Louise Evolution from doing weird, absurd material to very honest material. And I saw him become the guy that's like, I hate my kids, my daughter's a con, my wife this.

And I actually found it kind of thrilling as a comedian to watch someone just become really honest. And so I was thinking of it more that way. Like I wasn't reading into like maybe he really is a person. And so and I hadn't and so then like the rumors. So then one night he gets off stage and it was like the first time he really killed with that material material my daughter's a cut, but he wasn't famous yet And he comes off stage and he grabs me so hard by the neck Like I'm just standing behind like I'm just in the audience watching but with with all the comics are kind of but he like kind of Caused me over like and I go over over and he grabs me by the neck,

and he whispers me, I'm gonna fuck you someday, whether you like it or not. And I was like, okay, and then he walked away. It was almost this like, he was high off the applause and wanted to like get more high by like threatening someone or something. And I remember a friend of mine looking at me and melding like, what was that?

And I was like, nah, you know. me and me and me laughing like, what was that? And I was like, nah, you know. So then it was like little things like that. And so then the penultimate, that's not what the word means, but the big night was he gets off stage again, same club, I have a boyfriend, and what year is this now? 2004, I think. Okay.

Or three. Okay. It's three or four. Okay. I'm dating this guy who every time he wants to like do something, like something would come up in my comedy career. Oh my God, I got this gig. I have to do it. Sorry, I'm canceling dinner, you know.

And so I'm like, I'm gonna go to this show tonight. And he's like, you're not even on the show. And I'm like, I know, but it's, you gotta hang out and blah, blah, blah. And he's like, well, come over after and like, we'll snuggle. I'm like, okay. So I'm leaving. And Louis, like, where are you going? And he's like, we're all going around the corner.

Like, we do every week for a drink. I'm like, I know, but my boyfriend, and he's like, it's 9.30 or 10, like whatever. Like, just tell him to come or something. I'm like, no, he's not, whatever. So he called him and I'm like, I'm not coming over because all the comics are going out. And I'm thinking like, it's literally not this could be good

for my career, because Louis had no career. But it was just like, it's literally not this could be good for my career because Louis had no career, but it was just like everyone's going. Right, I understand. I do a good stuff. Yeah. And so Louis and I start walking over, but we're not waiting for the other comics. Like no one had started gathering outside yet and I go, oh, we're walking over. Now he's like, yeah, why not?

We'll just get, we'll secure a table or something. I'm like, oh, okay. So we go to this bar and the bar has an upstairs. And the upstairs, like the bar downstairs is normal. There's seats at a bar. And the upstairs is all floor pillows. It looks like a hook-alounge, but it's not. And he's like, let's sit up here.

And I was like, okay, he's a kettle, be less crowded. And so he picks this corner that if anyone walked into the bar and looked upstairs, you wouldn't be able to see us. I go, but no one can see us when they come in. They won't know we're here. He's like, they know we're here. Like, what are you being so neurotic about?

I'm like, oh, you're right, you're right. I really was not thinking anything pervy. I was more just stressed. I want everyone to come over here. And so we're sitting there. And again, my memory isn't fuzzy of what his intent was, but the exact words. He goes, oh, did I ever show you pictures of my daughter? And this is like pre-cell phones with pulls, wallet pictures out. And I'm like, oh, does your

wife and kid mind that you talk about the month's date? You know, we're talking about that. And he's like, so what would you say if a guy wanted to master being in front of you? And I'm like, oh, I don't know. And I think he's doing, I swear to God, I think he's asking me to help him work out a new bit that he's gonna try. Cause he talked about masturbation all the time on stage. So I'm like honored.

I'm like, Louis running a new bit by me. And like maybe he'll even use a punchline that I'm gonna write. Cause he's gonna do a bit about a fucking loser that wants to master bait in front of someone. He goes, I mean, what if the guy was like married with kids but was like, hey, I just want to master bait in front of you, like, you know, at a bar or something. And I was like, yeah, and I was like, okay, so the guy, and I'm like still talking like it's a bit, and he's like, Jen, and I'm like, what? And he's like, what if a guy wants to master bait in front

of you right here, or something like that? Like, he didn't say, can I master me? And I went, are you, wait, it was like that? And he's like, what, I like doing that, or something. He's like, I go, oh, I thought, I thought we were, oh, what is this? And he's like, I go, oh, I thought, oh, I thought we were, oh, what is this? And he's like, well, what did you think this was? We're like sitting up here in a, and I was like, oh, and then at that moment, like a bunch of the comics

found us. And like someone came over as comics do to like get attention from Louis. You know, so they all came over and sat down and it was without missing a beat. He goes, I was just showing Jenna picture of my daughter. And everyone's like, oh my God, that's so cute. And I was just sitting there like, this guy is fucking weird. And so I didn't, I think I got up and walked away. I was like, guys, guys, guys, I think he just asked me.

I think he was trying to master bait in front of me up there. And they were like, you know, we've heard, it wasn't in that moment, guys, guys, guys, I think he just asked me, I think he was trying to masturbate in front of me up there. And they were like, you know, we've heard, like it wasn't in that moment, but later on I started telling all these people, and most people didn't care. And some people were like, oh, he's done that to people before. And I was like, who? Because I didn't know these girls,

because they lived in Chicago and they had done this comedy festival that I was never in. And so they're like, these girls Dana and Julia, but I don't even know if I knew that's their names, but in the retelling, no one ever said their names to me. And I was like, I don't know who that is. I really didn't.

It turned out that like this project that this other girl I'm friends with Rebecca Corey, we both were up for this pilot that Courtney Cox was producing, where Louis, it would be Louis and a woman hosting like a late night daily show kind of show. And it was like, I was down to one of the finalists. I didn't get it, but Rebecca did. And he ended up trying to masturbate to her on the pilot.

And we knew each other. And he did that to her like within six months of doing it to me. And we never told each other. Like so really, I just kept hearing it, but I was like, I don't know who these people are. So anyway, I just found him more and more like disgusting. So then about six months later, I was on the road as Greg Barrett, he just not that into. I was his opening act on the road and Louis was following my my space or so I'm again this is like 2002 like no internet 2003 sorry it's after he already

asked me to jerk off with it he sends me an email he's like hey I see that you're at the West Palm Beach improv with Greg I'm gonna be in Miami and a few days you can be my opening act and I'm like oh fuck this is huge you know because he was starting to get big, even though he's like playing clubs. But he's like, and you could do more road gigs with me. Like, it'd be cool to like travel together, and you could be my open, and I was like, fuck, like,

and then he just wrote, oh, PS, I'm divorced now. Oh! And I was like, well, that tells me something, like, because I think that night I said to him something like, you're married, you know, which wasn't the reason I objected to him wanting to show me his dick. It was just sort of like, that's why I trusted him. Like, if a guy's married with kids,

I was stupid enough to think that didn't mean anything. I thought they weren't interested in me. So I think that's why he wrote that. And I just said, you know, honestly, like I make more at my temp job than I would as an opening act. And I can't, because I really need to make money. And I said, no, but I deep down, I didn't want to,

because it's not that I thought he's going to rate me or anything like that. I thought he blatantly wanted an opening act that would have sex with him. And I felt if I said yes, but knowing I wasn't going to have sex with him, it would just be annoying to him. And I really, if this is true, I don't begrudge him. I think it's weird, but I don't want to be in that back and forth of no, no, no, no.

And you know, I think that was really it. Like those were the three things. It wasn't, you know. Well, then there was one that I sent to you that someone wrote me and said, and I don't know what year this was. Oh, that's right, yes. So, okay, so that's part of this story though.

So, let me get going. So, yeah. You know, and now it's know what year this was. Oh, that's right. Yes, so, okay, so that's part of this story though. So, let me get going. So, yeah. You know, now it's like I'm just telling people, like don't go in a room with him. He's a fucking creep, like whatever, blah, blah. But I was still kind of a fan because like, you don't have a lot of options at that time, like women were still being kept out of a lot of things.

And so, you didn't have a lot of role models to look up to. And it was like, I liked the Conor comedy he was doing in a way. And I didn't realize it was like totally all him confessing his real, whatever. So bloody blah, I'm doing so cut to, it's like 2012 now. And I'm on the road in Atlanta. And I walk into the green room.

And it's like a comedy club, you know, that laughing skull place. All these comics just come and hang out. And these all these young guys, and I walk in and they're talking about how Louie likes to jerk off in front of female comics. And I was like, how do you guys know this stuff? And they're like, oh my god, there's so many stories. there's so many stories. And I somehow my story had gotten out and they were telling it. And I was like the one about the couches and the picture of his kid and I go,

wait, that happened to me. And the kid was like, that was you. And I said, yeah, and he goes, he goes, you know, he's such a fucking asshole. Like, I'm gonna tell everyone, why don't you speak out and tell everyone? I go tell them what though, like, I'm telling people to stay away from him, but like, it's not illegal to do anything he did to me, it's just really bad and gross. Right.

And they're like, but he's been doing it to all these people, like, I know, but like, literally, when I'm gonna call the cops, like, there's nothing, and I hate saying that, because then people argue against me and say, well, then it wasn't a big deal. It's like, whatever. Yeah. So, the kid tweets, I know for a fact that Louis is jerking up in front of women and blah, blah, blah. Louis was still on Twitter at this point or he used to check Twitter.

And he tweeted that kid or DMed the kid and said, call me, here's my number. And so the kid called Louis. And now meanwhile, we do the gigs that weekend me and that kid, I say, please leave me out of this. Do not mention me to Louis. And he's like, sorry, but I have to follow my heart. Like, I'm not gonna lie and cover up abuse. And I was like, okay. So I'm back in LA and cover up abuse. And I was like, okay.

So I'm back in LA and the kid calls me and he's like, Louis tried to manipulate me and tell me that he didn't do it and that all the women he jerked off in front of gave him his consent. And Louis said, you know, he was really wants to talk to you about this and he said he was gonna give you a call. And I was like, and Louie already had my number.

And I was like, okay, and the kid was like, I'm sorry, but I had to mention that I talked to you. It was like, it's fine, I don't really care. And he's like, but that guy's like a psycho. I can tell from talking to him, he's a fucking liar, and he got really angry, and he was like, trying to shut me down. And he's like, this must be bigger than we even know.

And I was like, yeah, maybe. But again, like, what am I gonna do? And why am I gonna, again, I wasn't afraid of my career ending. I just, what am I gonna do? And there was no social media viral need to. So Louis calls, I don't pick up. Then it kind of honestly just goes away for another few months.

Then I get an email from Louis, I would get it every so often after this. Oh my God, I just saw your episode of Drunk History. It is so funny, you were so funny. And I'm like, it's weird. Yeah. And he just kept writing me and then he wrote me, I saw you, oh my God, you were doing a show

at the improv lab and I was in the improv main room and I watched your stuff and I'm so sorry, I didn't have time to say hi after. And then you said, this is where you said, I'm sorry. This girl, a juicy scupper wrote me and said, I remember being at the lab at the improv and it was, which is a smaller room at the improv on Melrose in LA and Jen Kirkman was on stage doing her thing and I just remember Louis standing in the back like staring at her with his arms folded and to this eyewitness she felt that it was a move that he was hoping that you would see him and be intimidated as like, you know.

So it's very interesting that there was an element of intimidation and then an element of, remember me, I'm your friend. I'm your friend, I'm a fan, I can help you. So think about that when you're around people and you might wanna tell this story, think about that. Which is like people and you might want to tell this story Think about that which is like I mean, it's Harvey Weinstein type of stuff that you'd hear about, you know Like I'm come on. I'm your friend. Come on. Like I'm gonna help you get this part. Come on, you know Amazing well, and again, I didn't even see him there. So it goes all right, and I was more like oh

I was just working out new stuff like hope you didn't see that was probably not funny, but so then that keeps going on. And nothing changes. So then 2014, my Netflix special comes out. And in it, I talk about being divorced. And I talk about how I was horny after I got divorced, because we didn't have sex a lot. And I slept with a younger guy,

and I did a bit about masturbation. It's very innocent stuff compared to whatever. But whatever. Yeah, but that's like, you know so I'm in Australia doing this comedy festival and Louis is blowing up at this point getting famous for telling jokes about sex masturbation and divorce so here I am like kind of like also doing stuff like that not anything to do with him. It was just what I was going through and Also doing stuff like that, not anything to do with him. It was just what I was going through. And all the reviews I got in Australia of my show,

because I performed the show there, were kind of like three stars out of five, and it was all men, and they were like, she's just trying to be dirty to get attention. And my show wasn't dirty at all. And the New York Times gave it a nice review. So it was like, there was just a lot of sexism going on. And every interview I did to promote my run of shows in Australia, they'd say, what's

it like being a woman in comedy? And I'm like, I'm not answering this because you're going to say there's sexism. And then the headline's going to be, Jen Kirkman says there's sexism. And it's not going to be funny. And no one's going to come. Do you ever ask the guys this? And it was like, I did a whole day of press. So I go back to my hotel room and I have a bottle of wine

or a couple of glasses of wine. And I do my podcast that I do where I just talk about my week. And again, I'd only been doing that podcast for about a year. I didn't think I knew when was listening, except my diehard fans. And I turn on the mic and I go,

this is what it's like being a woman in comedy. Is that you have to deal with these fucking questions and your show doesn't get a good review even though if a man did it, he'd be like called a woman in comedy is that you have to deal with these fucking questions and your show doesn't get a good review even though if a man did it he'd be like called a genius. And I gave three examples of men in comedy that nobody ever followed up with me on. I had one guy who's like a famous nerd comics say, you can't do material about being a dork because you're too pretty and he screamed it in my face shaking with anger. Then I had another male comic make fun of me for writing a book about not wanting kids

because it offended him. And these are two beloved male comics, Brian Possein and Pat Noswald. Okay. Yeah, are they friends of mine, sure. But, you know, they don't do that to their male comedy friends. Right.

And then I said the big one is there's a well-known purve who there's all these rumors about him. I don't know the people he did, but he did some stuff to me. And I couldn't go on tour them because I was afraid he was gonna try to have sex with me or jerk off in front of me. And I said, so that is what it's like being a woman

in comedy is where treated differently by our peers. And we always have to worry about if we're about to get like yelled at or sexually assaulted. And I said worry about if we're about to get like, y'all dad or sexually assaulted, and I said, you know, my manager is always like, you know, don't even bother talking about this stuff, the skies are just like, you know, the known purve is just a loser like, he's, like don't even bother, it's just gonna make you look bad,

like it's gonna bring up more or whatever. So I go, I just mentioned that, and I'm like, so the reason I don't talk about it is because I don't have any, like, what it's gonna bring up more or whatever. So I go, I just mentioned that. And I'm like, so the reason I don't talk about it is because I don't have any, like, what am I gonna do, you know? So, but that's what it's like. And I put it out and Jezebel, a feminist in quotes website that I've been interviewed by. Instead of calling me and saying, hey,

can we talk about your blind item podcast? They run an article saying, gendest out at Louis CK and they guessed the blind item and wrote everything I said and then wrote a hit piece on me saying, I'm a bad feminist for not saying his name and for not doing more. And they completely ignored the whole overview of my point, which was all the types of things men in comedy say, which to me saying you're too pretty to be a dork is just like not just as offensive, but it's bothersome. And I wrote the and I took the podcast down because I was like oh my god, like the press was pouring in. It was like, it wouldn't stop. And then they wrote another piece saying, Jen Kirkman probably did she get paid off,

but you know, these people that go, just asking questions. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And did she get paid off by Louis CK to take it down? And it's like, no. So anyway, now Louis is emailing me. Can you give me a call? And I say, no, I can't.

I don't want you yelling at me. He's like, I'm not gonna yell at you. I'm like, whatever you need to say to me, we can do it over email. So this is like a few months later. Now the press is going crazy. Everyone's picking up the story. I'm just trying to stay quiet.

So I'm getting it on all ends. People are getting the story wrong and they're saying he jerked off in front of me and I'm saying no, he didn't. And they're like, why'd you lie? I didn't lie, you got it wrong. Well, you didn't even, you know, or why are you covering up for him?

So no one believed me. Feminists were mad at me and his defenders. I had no one on my side in the press. And I was handling it all by myself. I mean, I had a publicist manager. No one knew what to do. And I'm trying to promote a Netflix special and a book. And everyone's like, you just did this for attention.

I'm like, I trust me. And every media outlet that I wanted to do an interview with for my special or my book said only if she talks about Louis. So no one cared about my work, whatever. And it literally never ending shit like that, Google alerts on my name, death threats, harassment, little independent theaters I would play would call my agent and say, we're getting a lot of death threats to Gen 1, a higher security. This went on from 2014 until Louis confessed it in the New York Times.

So basically, Louis and I were emailing during this three-year period every once in a while. And he completely manipulated me. Like, I can still feel my body, the email he sent. He's like, hey Jen, I saw all the stuff that's going around and listen, I'm not mad at you. I know I did all that stuff to you. He said, I handed you a pile of shit and now it's your pile of shit to do whatever you want with and you can talk about it and you can say my name and you can do anything because it's true and it's yours. And then he went through and apologized for everything he did to me and there was a ton of

stuff in there that he never did to me. And now I realized another another one of his victims, Rebecca, has the same story. He's confusing his victims. But I was so manipulated because I'd never had anything like this happen that I actually came away from that email, like warm and fuzzy thinking, oh my God, he's so great that he even remembered stuff he did that I didn't remember. Like this must have really weighed on him. Like I believed his memory. I didn't even think, no, that's another victim

that you shoved in a bathroom or whatever. So, oh my God. I write him back and I say, but Louis, I've been hearing that you actually jerked off in front of people and cornered them and blah, blah. And he's like, do you know these people are? I go, I don't know anyone's name. That's a thing.

Like, I just hear all the stories, but no, and he's like, so maybe it's a rumor. Maybe it's just like, you know, and I said, but you did ask me and he goes, well, I mean, I've said things to other people too, but I don't do that anymore. And I said, so you've never jerked off in front of anyone, you've never physically done anything.

He goes, I promise you I haven't. And I said, okay, I guess I believe you. And I think I made a choice to believe him. And I said, here's the thing, the press won't stop and this isn't gonna go away. So do you wanna make, like, do you wanna come on my podcast? I mean, like, I know you're probably famous right now, and like, but do you wanna do like a joint statement with me?

Because people are saying you're paying me off. Like, I just need everyone to know the truth, so they'll stop. And he's like, I can't, I'm in therapy and my daughters. And I was like, you're right, you're right. Like, I don't wanna harm your daughters. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's like, my therapist says, or something like that,

like just ignore it. And he's like, you have to ignore it too. You just have to stop talking. You have to ignore it. Like, don't react to anything. Oh my God. I mean, great advice in a way, but we know why. He's saying that.

So he knew I was close to the target, right? And I believed him. I don't know why. And so I had one interview coming up with the Village Voice, and they were going to promote my book or something. And of course, they asked the question. And just thinking that, you know what, let's shut this shit down.

I said, I talked to Louis. He apologized. He said he did not do this to anyone. He's my friend and I believe him. So then the woman said, well, what about TIGNATARO's show? Something, something Tennessee, where there was an episode where there was like a guy based on Louis that did the jerking off and the whatever.

Now TIGS, a good friend of mine, and I'd actually told Tiggs the story about Louis, because she used to work with him on this show. And one day I went to her house, she just had her babies, and I was like, how is it working with Louis? You know, we just talked for him, and I was like, you know that he's like kind of a bad guy, right? And I told her my story. And I said, there's all these rumors he did this to women. take was like what like she literally did not know they'd never gotten to her

The rumors and she was like so she immediately took action and like wrote an episode of the show about him and like stopped working with him and she went TIG did the thing that I didn't do she went hunting to find out who these other women were and she found them. And like she wrangled this entire thing together, I think, and like got the New York Times involved. So I didn't know any of that she was doing any of that. So when I said to the village voice,

he's my friend and I believe him, meanwhile behind the scenes, TIG is like doing the real work. But she was really famous too. You know what I mean? Like, it was different. Like, I don't think I could have achieved that. And so, and I feel like I'm making excuses,

but I just like, I literally, I mean, you're not making excuses. I'm so happy that you've told the whole story from the beginning to end. I mean, I think it just makes so much sense. I was always confused by it. And that's why when Chris and I talked about it the other day, you were like, oh my God, yes.

Because I was like, I don't wanna ask her to come on because she says she doesn't wanna talk about it anymore and like throughout the years. Yeah, yeah. And now I really understand exactly what happened. And I remember also during this time, you had, you know, sold a show to ABC. You had things happening and the effect show

and you had deals going and you definitely didn't want to disrupt this. And this was before me too, which now, now it's like such a freedom that we have because I'm like, who the fuck cares? Like there's nobody that I wouldn't talk about. I mean, there's one person I won't talk about now, but I will say there was definitely,

I was definitely more guarded, even four or five years ago, definitely. And it's not that I thought Louie could end my career. It's that people think you're crazy and they don't want to work with you. They think you're going to be a loud mouth on set and they think if they walk by you too closely, you're going to call them a rapist.

And it's like, no. So the woman, the village voice interviews me, I. So I basically, like, so the woman, the village voice interviews me, I say, I believe in me's my friend. She goes, what about that episode, TIG just did, where she's talking about, and I go, oh, I don't know what TIG's talking about. That's the tone I said it. Like, I don't watch the show, not in a bad way.

I just don't want to. And I was like, oh, I don't know what she's talking about. I go, oh, well, if TIG knows something, I don't like, yeah. I mean, if it turns out that these women come forward, I believe them. But for now, I just don't know them, so I believe, I have to choose to believe him and just put this to rest, so that article comes out. And then all these articles come out about the article.

Jen Kirkman says, I don't know what TIG's talking about. I'm like, that's not what I meant. So then I had to call TIG and be like, there's all these articles coming out. I did not see anything bad about you. I literally just said, oh, I don't know, tell me. I thought it was like an off the cuff question to the woman interviewing me and Teg's like,

yeah, well, there's a big New York Times story coming out next week. I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? She's like, I'll give the woman your info. I'm like, oh, Teg, so like Teg and I, like I made peace not that we were in any fight or anything, but I want to her to know. So then the New York Times calls me,

do you want to be in this article? And I was like, no, enough of my fucking name. I think the best thing is if I'm not involved because I want the other victims to have their moment without my stupid name once again being attached to something. And then when that came out, I tweeted in regards to my last comments like Louis no longer my friend and I don't believe him and he's a liar and he's so cute.

So I so so so that was it like that is the fucking story. And when he confessed, I really thought maybe he'll come out and do maybe he'll go away for well and he'll come back and he'll talk about it and donate all the proceeds to whatever. But then I realized, oh, he's always been a sociopath and what he got off on was scaring people. And then so lastly, I'd only talked about it in the most unfunny way as this whole story has proven.

So when I did my comedy album a few months ago, I wasn't planning on talking about it. I have a bit about a flasher. I saw my first penis when I was four years old at the town library, and the flasher had on a burberry jacket. They used to dress so good, and they'd open their coat and show you their dick. And so I said, that's the life of a woman.

It's like everywhere you go to do something else, a guy's trying to show you their dick. And I said, you know, flashers used to dress so well. And it came flying out of my mouth as though like a spiritual intervention was happening. Like I was not in control of what I was saying. It was just coming pouring out.

And I said, you know, flashers used to dress so well. And Louis C. K. tried to show me his dick. He was just wearing a shitty black t-shirt. And the audience gasped. And I was like, let's go. And I told them one aspect of the story, which was the bar scene. And the reason I told it is because I'm so tired

of hearing people say he asked for consent. I'm like, that is not what consent means. A girl that you sort of work with and you're married with kids. You go to a public bar and ask her if you can jerk off in that bar. That's not asking consent. The whole situation is not with, like, I'm not consenting to being even asked something like that. That's not what consent means. Consent is like, you're my boyfriend and you ask me something. And so after he apologized in the New York Times, a year later, he comes out with a special called

Sorry, which is so gaslighting. And he makes fun of his victims. And he says that he asked their consent. And they said, yes. And his joke is what I've learned is if people say, yes, you have to ask, are you sure? So he totally lied and said that people said, yes. Even though the ones that did probably went,

yeah, like kidding, they didn't realize you were serious. And so he lied. The point is with the emails that he sent to you and Rebecca. He doesn't remember his facts or his victims or anything. And anyway, so like continue. Well, so then he handed his fans a bunch of talking points with that special. So now he goes, I asked consent.

So now they go, what's a big deal? He asked consent and you said, yes, but, but, but, but, and then he goes, I lost 50 million. $50 million was not taken out of his bank account. He added up all the deals that he could have gotten a big deal. Oh, I just lost 100 million. Like, you can just say anything, you know You know, like, he's still very wealthy. He's never not been a millionaire, blah, blah, blah. And so long story, even longer, I release my album.

Yeah, you lost the deals because the behavior that you've been doing finally got out and people knew your real character and your work is based on your character. Your character isn't cute anymore. That's why you lost the fucking deals. Right, and it's like, you know, it's like, it's a corporate world, like Netflix,

ABC, they're corporations, like if you destroy your own brand, what the fuck would they want to do with you? They're not gonna make any money. They're not trying it to be woke. They're doing it because they're not gonna make money because you tarnished your own brand, and you're in HR liability,

because a lot of this stuff he did in the fucking workplace and I don't mean comedy clubs. He did it on sets and things like that. And so I release the album and I say, oh, isn't this amazing? Like I'm finally doing something that's funny and all these guys are like free speech. I can just say it's just jokes, you know. And Louis wins a Grammy for that album where he makes fun of his victims. The week my album comes out.

And so I've got this clip going around where I'm making fun of Louis. So the harassment happened all over again. But this time I was like, I'm gonna fuck a make money off it. Every time I got harassed, I just kept leaning into it, promoting it, and being like, by my album, I was like, fuck it, you know? So it did hurt me. I did have like minor... The PTSD is not from Louis.

It's from people harassing me, you know? And so that's... I did say I don't want to talk about it, but only to like... I don't want to talk about it to the press, but like friends who have a podcast, of course, you know? And a woman, not like whatever, but it's just so, it's just, he's just so gross. And like the bottom line is like,

I think we need to stop framing it as like, it's offensive, like he's just a fucking loser. Like what a loser, just what a loser. Yeah, and what exactly, and you know, that this is how he conducted himself all these years and presented himself And, you know, this is how he conducted himself all these years, and presented himself like, you know, he was such as advocate of women by doing, what's her name, the Adelaun show, Better Off.

Oh, yeah, Better Things, yeah. Better Things, you know, and- And that was his cover, I guess. Yeah, to act like he was this big, you know, advocate of female comics and everything, when it was always had an Underlining desire I bring this up so many times when I talk about Louis CK But I got wind of the movie that he did I think it has been scraped everywhere

I don't know if anyone can find out that like daddy's girl or when I'm yeah It's this black and white film that's very much in the vein of Woody Allen and he is the voice of he wrote the movie and started it and he's like the moral voice in it and his you know his wife uses horrible language and his friend is jerking off in front of an executive and his daughter is pursuing a seven yearyear-old man who she wants to fuck and then when he talks about it his this other girl that he's with says I pursued a 38-year-old man when I was 17 so the whole movie was put out and was supposed to be put out in the media but they pulled it because of the scandal for people to see it like they

did the movie Manhattan or whatever that was thinking oh I guess this 40 year old man or in Woody Allen's case you know or this 70 year old man in this Louis C. K. movie I guess a 17 year old woman would really be attracted to him and really willingly is mature enough to want to fuck him and oh really she's the manipulator and really she's the manipulator and really she's the one that's driving this relationship. Maybe a Lolita situation is

okay. And that is where when people talk about people in media and it could go to extremes whatever putting the ideas in our heads that something is okay, it is so true because you look back at movies from 20 years ago I cannot believe this movie was made at a studio that people put this out thinking that this was okay for millions of people to see and get in our heads. And so we all been groomed by things like this. Yes, so I'm like that was such a grooming mechanism and I wish that the movie could get out because I think if it got out and if more people talked about it, I don't, I think they would, who knows, you know what,

if they, if people like Louis CK and the club wants to put them on and the people want to come and pay to see them, then that is their freedom as a club owner and their freedom as a Patreon and, you know, a patron and a patron, not patron, but you know, that's the right of America. And I don't wanna see that shut down. But I also love that we're able to talk about it and share our stories. And that's why I always say people,

should share your whole story from your perspective because it's easier if you say it all and then someone tries to poke holes and they give their version and then you have to defend yourself So sometimes when I feel like in my career when when people you know said I'm gonna say this about you I was like, you know what? There's a story. I haven't told you guys yet and I'm gonna tell you right now This because good luck trying to come you know once I've already shared my side of it So I think you i really love that you

said it and i want people to understand your perspective and what you went through and and you explained it really really well and i never really understood all the nuances of it either and and then how it just kept going like this and people kept going back and forth and back and forth and and so i want to imagine if your fans were so rabid for you that they just harassed people all day until them to kill themselves. Like, wouldn't you jump in and be like, guys, what are you doing?

We're not creating this kind of culture, but he loves it. But I mean, I have been perhersed by Selena Gomez robots. And I will never say a negative thing about Selena Gomez either. It was like 72 hours of rat emojis and me having to block people. And it was, I get it. I don't know what people hire like yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. I think Louis hired a bot farm. Yes. Because when I, when it was first happening to me, I thought, wow, these teenagers certainly have a lot of time on their hands. Don't they have to go to Zoom school or something?

What, how do they have this much time? And then I realized whether she's part of it or not or her team, 100% that happens. And it works. Just, it's the cyber mafia. It does work. It makes, it does get under skin and it makes you go, God, it's just not worth it.

Like, I'll never talk a negative story about her again because like, you know, forget it, you know. Yeah. So, I definitely think it happens, you know. Well, some might be genuine, but I think a lot are bought. I think they're all mixed in. I think like, Christel is a great example of a groomer. His entire act was to attract teenage girls.

He's like, girls say this, like a man in his 40s calling women girls, and then when girls are drunk, they're like this, I'm like, what girls are you hanging out with? You sound, this is a material that an 18-year-old should be doing. Right. And that's when I get sad. All these young, young women, those are all his fans, and then he does that on purpose, so he can DM them and blah, blah.

It's just such a gross business that I'm glad, like, I'm glad it's been exposed, and I'm glad people's eyes are kind of open, because once you see it, you're like, you're right. That is what you're doing. You know what I mean? That was grooming, that, oh my God, I never thought of it like that.

And that's why I like discussing this type of stuff sometimes, you know? Because I have to be more patient. It is just the beginning of people realizing this stuff and I'm like, let's fix it now, but it'll get there. Yes. People will be grossed out on their own by these kind of people.

It's gonna take a while Jen Thank you so much for coming on juicy scoop. I miss you tell everybody where they can see the latest albums the books the podcast go for it well Something I'm doing. I'm very passionate about is my new podcast called anxiety bites It's free everywhere you get podcasts and doing it with I heart radio I called anxiety bites. It's free everywhere you get podcasts and doing it with I Heart Radio. I love it and I interview like experts about anxiety but it's like fun and you know people swear and so if you think you need some help go listen to that and then I have

a new comedy album called Okay Gen X and you can hear that. Louis story and funny stories about my mom and Catholicism and blah blah blah and you can buy that on iTunes or Amazon or you know just go to my Twitter at Jen Kirkman everything's in my link there. Jen thank you let me know when you're back in LA let's go out with our boy Chris Frenchola and Sarah and anyone else that's in touch. I hope to be back a few times between June and July like a couple times each month hopefully not catching um like a couple of times each month, hopefully not catching COVID on my flight there. So we'll see. I'm stopping.

I'm negative. Listen, you're gonna come out, you're gonna come on our boat. Oh no, you get seasick. Never mind. No, I don't. What kind of boat? No, on a whale watch, it's not a whale watch, is it?

No, it's just around Newport. Oh no, I get seasick from that. I only get seasick on like a whale watch. Okay, let's get me away from like the ocean. I'll come on the boat. And then I'm to get seasick from that. I only get seasick on like a whale watch. Okay, then give me away from like the ocean. I'll come on the boat. And then I'm excited for Sex and the City. Yes. This is two, I will probably back in the lane.

Okay, wait, back in the lane. Before you go. Yeah. Tell me your predictions. Okay. Well, gee, I don't know if I have real predictions, but what I want is what I'm gonna tell you what I want. Okay. I want Chae Diaz who is like, you know, mislike, you know, politically correct about everything.

If you remember in the last episode, she's like, I'm doing a pilot and Tony Danza is playing my dad, even though he's not Mexican. I want her to get canceled for allowing a white guy to play her dad. I want her to have a scandal where it's like, oh, she's miss woke except for, you know, when it's gonna be her success I want Miranda to break up with her and go back to New York and try to do that internship and have her black professor be like listen white bitch Like you can't be like I want this internship. Oh wait, now I don't like you're acting the most white privilege ever And you think you're like, you know helping the world and you're not. I want Carrie's podcast to stop taking phone calls. I want no more anyone's kids, don't care about the kids.

No one's kids can be in it. And I want Charlotte to act, look, whatever's going on with her, I need her to act more normal. Like, I don't know how to explain it. She seems out of it, like the actress, not the character. She's just saying her lines weird. I don't know how to explain it. She seems out of it, like the actress, not the character. She's just saying her lines weird. I don't know how to explain it.

I have a good story line for Charlotte that just came into my head. Yeah, so I don't have the winner. The winner, the older daughter, you know, that she adopted, I forgot her lily. She's such a winner. She, after everything, she gets accepted to a bunch of colleges.

She's like, I don't want to do college. I don't want to go. I don't want to, I'm not going to do the scholarship. I'm not going to do this. But Lily, we got you into Princeton. And you got, and why you? And I've done Stanford. What do you mean?

And it's like, that's your dream mom. I'm not a sorority girl. I did all this and you're letting Rose be a, what was the boys now? Rose being red, rock, red, rock. We're letting Rose be a boy. You can let me not be an Ivy Leager to fill out your dream. I love fancy things.

So I, but all your other stuff I love, and then the podcast thing, I was watching a complete marathon of the original series this past weekend. Oh, sorry. And the podcast thing just doesn't work because it's about the narration in her head. So I think she does, like either we have no narration

or we just get rid of that altogether, but we definitely do not need to see corny jokes and multiple people talking, oh my God, I have to tell you the funniest thing. So I'm with Brandon, my son, and we're getting a salad after a beach day because he's on spring break and I park my car in this guy is parks his car. He's probably like 35. It's just like out in West Lake Village

And I put on my sweatshirt for juicy scoop and how he it didn't even say juicy scoop on it But somehow he goes, oh is that merch from your show? And I go, oh, yeah, I go. Yeah It was what kind of show is it? I go. It's a podcast called juicy show and I go oh yeah I go yeah I it was what kind of show is it I go it's a podcast called to see scoop and he goes oh really I've got a podcast too it is like a pretty nice car everything and you know we we interview gangsters and maybe we didn't say gangsters but he said we interview like celebrities rappers whatever and I go okay great so on the ride home I go Brandon okay, great. So on the ride home, I go, Brandon, let's just, oh, and the name of the podcast is his license plate.

So I'm like, let's just, let's just listen to it on the way home. And he goes, well, God, they don't have a lot, right away, Brandon's like a podcast expert. He's like, they don't have a lot of reviews and they only have five episodes at. So I don't know out, so I don't see what, how big of a hit this is.

I go, let's just listen to it. It is three guys talking about fast food for the first seven minutes. Oh. And then, I mean, and they're like, all right, let's get, I'm like, this is why people think that they can be podcasters. Listen, I don't know how to be a contractor.

Yeah. It's like me trying to drywall something and wire something. It's like, just because you know how to speak, does not mean that you can have a successful podcast with your two other friends. That is what I felt like they were showing us with the sex in the city, you know, and just like that podcast.

It was that horrific. It was like an outsider thinking this is what, it's like me thinking this is what it must be like for like contractors to get together in real life. I don't know how to fucking do it. I have one more, it's not a prediction, this is a suggestion. As we have these political tensions with Russia, it reminds me of the 80s when everyone was like,

it's not the Russian people, it's the Russian government. You know, we're still, so we need like that kind of, we had a lot of programming, like family ties had Alex playing chess with a Russian guy and they became best friends, whatever. So Carrie and Barish and Akhov need to get back together. So Alex Saunders needs to. I love it.

Love that I do. I come back and say, you know, Paris, it was, I'm so lonely. I want to be with you and live in New York and they get back together and it's like this Russian American romance. And that's also awkward because whoever is in their friend group shows up with like the Ukraine thing on their hat or whatever Flag is like flying everywhere and so it's like Okay, last last last other last thing about the show. Um, who else is there?

There's Miranda. Um, oh, well, the new characters. I don't care about seeing God. I was going to say one other thing. I can't remember. Anyway, I'm, oh, no, I know in the original show, you know, because there was so many, so much commentary, which you did great commentary to. I love watching yourok's and stuff

is well someone said you know i think the reason there's a problem with and just like that is because when we watched it these girls were in their thirties and we were watching it as girls in our thirties are even younger girls so there was a hope of like every episode is this going to be the one who they can end up with yet their thirty and they have money and they have cute

outfits and they can pay for a full dinner but they get to fuck different guys every week what a fun thing to aspire to be right yeah so then at fifty five one is dead one is you know gain exploring sexuality another one like it is no longer liking her husband and her son your is net her daughters now a son

and like we're dealing with all this stuff and it's like is no longer liking her husband and her son, her daughter is now a son. And we're dealing with all this stuff, and it's like, my friends and I are a little bit younger than them, but I'm like, I could not be more happy with my life. I'm having fun, I finally have some money. My friends and I are meeting up where most of my friends are happily married, but then again, I guess they thought

that wouldn't be enough tension and drama, but I still think we could see these girls at that age. Yes. Having aspiring things. Of course, like you have that to look forward to. Like it even is better, it's even more fun. Instead, it's all this depressing stuff that comes with age. I mean, it's all this depressing stuff that comes with age.

I mean, it's some really good things that come with age. Loving my life. Yeah. And I'm just like, yeah, there's things that like, there's challenges, but like we, yeah, they can make it funny. Oh, and yeah. And the last thing I was going to say,

the last thing I was going to say is, the other thing I never noticed that people brought up is what a bitch carries character was. And how actually unsupportive and awful she was about everything. She was negative about Charlotte marrying Tray. She they were rude about it. Like there was one time where like Miranda talks about Steve having statistical cancer and she's like okay but I have to go to a farm this weekend so try to talk to a farm this weekend. So try to talk to me like every single thing was like, if that was your real friend, you'd

be like, fuck you. And so that's why with the backstory of really what's the writer's idea of why Charlotte left besides them being a bitch to her on set for 20 years is I was really good friend. Kim. Control. Not kid Charlotte. sorry, Kim Kittrell. Samantha, it was like, I was a really good friend to you for a long time.

And I finally woke up during COVID, and we had a fucking COVID friendship break up because I realized you were an exhausting bitch, and when I didn't have to deal with you for six months, I really didn't miss it. That's the truth. I'm really agree with that that because Samantha was always the greatest friend on the show. So supportive of everyone. Busiest career, always made time for people.

And even this season, this new reboot, Carrie was such a prude about sex. It was like, you're a sex calmness. And Charlotte would be like, I blew Harry. She's like, okay, and you know they do this all the time. They did it in the first original series, too. Whenever someone's sitting about sex at lunch, Carrie cancels her. Cancels my rice pudding, like, I'm like, you can't eat, and you're about sex. It's so weird, I think it's like,

Macon Patrick King, this is the funniest joke in the world. But she's such a crude. I didn't realize she was a terrible person until recently. I'm like, did I watch the entire series thinking she was normal? Maybe I was jerked. I don't know. People now realize that Louis CK and Jared Bradshaw are terrible people. Yeah.

I love you, Chad. I love you more. Thank you so much. I'll see you in hopefully a month or two. Yes, I'll see you. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Bye.