Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald - Catfished By Your Best Friend, JLo and Matt Damon with Brittany Brave
Episode Date: September 10, 2024JLo and Matt Damon were photographed appearing to have a deep discussion. Vanderpump Rules is gearing up for a double comeback. Dancing with the grifters features Anna Delvey. Then hilarious comedian ...Brittany Brave joins me. Brittany shares a horrible ex boyfriend story and how she bravely left the relationship. Three women were all catfished and you will be shocked by who was doing the catfishing. Fyre Festival is returning and people want to go. Enjoy! For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering Juicy Scoop listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you go to https://Nutrafol.com and enter the promo code JUICYSCOOP. You gotta check out the new softside Luggage from Away. Head on over to https://awaytravel.com/juicyscoop. Stand Up Tickets and info: https://heathermcdonald.net/ Shop Juicy Scoop Merch https://juicyscoopshop.com Get EXTRA Juicy on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/juicyscoop Follow Me on Social Media: Instagram: https://www/instagram.com/heathermcdonald TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@heathermcdonald Twitter: https://twitter.com/HeatherMcDonald Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hannah McDonald, Juicy Scoop.
Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop.
Remember you guys, I have lots of dates this fall
and into now 2025, it's all at heathermcowell.net. The next one up, it'll be
the Venetian for standup and a full Juicy Scoop experience with Brandon and Julie. And that is
on Saturday, September 21st at the Venetian. So that's the next show up. Make sure you get it.
But I'm going everywhere, including the Irvine Improv improv in November and that one always sells out five shows that weekend of November
8th 9th and 10th. So check it out. Okay. Let me get into my super fun weekend
I went to a fabulous weekend for my friend Laurie Smith's daughter Hannah Smith and it was beyond fabulous
It was in Santa Barbara because we I just want to tell you how it disgustingly hot it was in Santa Barbara because we, I just wanna tell you how disgustingly hot it was in LA.
And I rarely complain about LA weather
because it is the one fabulous thing
and what you deal with with paying the money
that we pay in everything else in LA
is that the weather's nice.
But it is really gross and really hot and gross.
So we got to go to Santa Barbara,
which was absolutely lovely, like 30 degrees cooler.
And nothing gets me
more excited than when it's really hot like that. And then you get in your car and you
see the temperature go down and down and down as you drive through California. Anyway, it
was fabulous. They did it at this beautiful estate, got married over the ocean. Then we
walked through the state to the through the estate to the backyard.
It was so fun.
And there were a couple cool things that they did that I really want to just talk about
for wedding people.
Now, this is a very expensive wedding, so I understand not everyone can do this.
But one thing is they didn't have the recap day after brunch thing that a lot of people
do.
I did it.
And it was kind of great, you know, because it's like you partied hard.
You don't want to get all cute.
And we already said goodbye.
We already had our fun.
If you got too drunk, maybe you don't want to show up at that brunch and have someone
be like, oh, you had a good time.
And you're like, I don't even fucking remember.
Was there a cake?
Who needs that?
But what they did that was so great
is they had kind of a pre-cocktail party situation
for anybody that was invited to the wedding
to come after their rehearsal dinner and rehearsing.
And then they had their dinner,
everyone who was in the wedding.
And then everybody else came and they had pizza
and open bar and everyone got to meet each other.
So then when you see each other the next day,
you've met all these people.
It's not the first time.
So it made the wedding so much more fun.
And I just thought that was great.
Also, I couldn't believe this
but the bride sang an original song that she wrote with her dad and the dad played
guitar Danny Smith and I just I couldn't believe it. It was so good. I told them
that they have to make an original song. I mean, they have to record it because,
I mean, anybody could change the words in between
about your spouse in this wedding, in the song.
It is, anyway, so it was fabulous.
And then we stayed at the beautiful Miramar Rosewood Hotel,
which was just very, one of those places where you walk in
and you just smell the wealth.
I mean, I dressed like a classy lady. I prepared my outfit for what it's like to be a rich Santa Barbara woman.
I loved every second of it. It's very, very pricey, but I finally made it, you guys,
thanks to Juicy Scoop. So it was great and here, Peter and I enjoying ourselves.
Yes, I wore this dress before.
I do wear things over and over again
so that I can afford the Miramar and Rosewood on occasion.
And I do my own hair and makeup.
Also saves me a lot of money.
Anyway, so, so fun.
Okay.
Now this was Juicy, okay?
J.Lo is, went to the premiere of her movie,
which was produced by Ben Affleck
and Matt Damon's production company
about a wrestler and she plays the mother.
She shows up in just the revenge dress.
I mean, the body's always banging,
but it was this like mirror ball sequins dress
full side cleavage
Full ass cleavage like it was like she took two pieces of paper and then just did like a little ribbon
So all the side the tiny waist the start of the ass
But then this part was covered so it's was like class from the front, slut from the
side. Looked amazing. And then there is a photo that Page Six shared of her sitting
down holding Ben, Matt Damon's hand and having like an in-depth conversation. Ben Affleck
did not go to this premiere, Matt Damon did.
And what I think is so juicy about that is like,
this is his best friend, his partner.
She's known him from the first time they were engaged
to this last one.
And first of all, you know,
Matt Damon sounds and seems like a peach.
He's been married forever.
No one has a bad word to say about him
and he's a good friend.'s been married forever. No one has a bad word to say about him.
And he's a good friend.
But it just, you know, now it could have been
that he took her hand and was like,
Jennifer, you were so incredible in this movie.
I knew that you would just kill it.
It could have been that.
It could have been nothing about Ben Affleck.
But when you see something like this,
it's like when you go to a party and you see someone that's connected to your ex or your
ex best friend or whatever, and you kind of have that little like moment, maybe it's the
first time and you have the heart to heart and you're like, I mean, it could have been
like girl, I know what you've been through. I don't know why he just got up and left one day.
I don't know what to tell you.
He's a complicated dude, but you, let's just focus on how talented you are in this movie.
Like you're going to get an Oscar.
Who knows?
And wouldn't it be great?
Because I believe it's more of like a supporting role that she's doing in this movie, but it's
getting buzz.
And wouldn't that be great if she got like the worst year of her
life also resulted in an Oscar in the next year? I don't know or an Oscar nod or something so I feel
like she's back on track with her side tits and her good movie and all that so there you go.
movie and all that. So there you go. Vanderpump supposedly is filming a pilot with all new cast members and this is coming from
Bravo Breaking News, okay? And this was an article I think from TMZ. And so they're filming
at the restaurant, all different people, hoping that some of those people will be well enough to have their own show.
Maybe they'll merge them.
Maybe they'll have two separate
Vanderpump shows altogether
and bring back the original cast doing one thing,
but then really have a new young cast
that actually works the restaurants
kind of the way the show started.
So I thought that was interesting.
Our girl Kristen Doty, originally from Vanderpump Rules,
she's dated James Kennedy,
she dated Tom Sandoval first, then James Kennedy,
had an indiscretion with Jax Taylor,
then had a couple other boyfriends and close engagements.
She finally, she is happy, she got engaged
to her boyfriend who was also featured on the show
and he's a normie from Colorado,
now a reality star with her, so good for her.
And Ariana Maddox's brother,
who I spoke about before, Jeremy,
he is facing a lot.
His attorneys are fighting for him. They're fighting these
felony drug charges. He and his friend were their luggage. They were leaving Orlando International
Airport, and they found large amounts of marijuana in their luggage, over 100 pounds of marijuana combined.
But he is fighting this charge. He's on an $80,000 bond,
but he could face anywhere between three and 30 years.
So I guess three, maybe three is the minimum
and 30 is the maximum.
I'm not sure.
But the mother is saying good things about him. His employer is like, he can still work here,
and he has a fiancé.
And, you know, I just want to bring this up
because it's like Ariana got some kind of like shit,
like in the talking of like, where's her brother?
And she wasn't there for the brother's birthday
or she wasn't there when the brother
and the fiancé got engaged.
I don't know, you know, these are adult siblings, and she's got a
lot going on. And maybe it was just, they just maybe there was a bunch of stuff we didn't
know about it. Maybe this was one of them. Maybe she kind of felt he was involved in
stuff that she didn't want to sign off on and didn't want to be a part of. And maybe
she knew about it, but didn't want to like tell the mother
and maybe she tried to tell him and he did it.
We don't know.
But I mean, just sometimes when people judge that,
oh, why wasn't the person,
oh, just because she's become a big star,
now she's not hanging out with her brother.
It's not always what you think.
As someone, you know,
who shared a lot about my life
and my adult sibling relationships,
things change when you become adults. And then when one is a public figure, everyone always is so quick
to judge that that person is, you know, aren't who they used to be. So anyway, whatever happens.
Yeah, you know, I don't want to see anyone spend their whole life in prison or anything,
but I'm just kind of thinking from her perspective, maybe that was a little more to it than just, you know,
than what we first were seeing when other,
when, you know, people were throwing him parties and stuff
and she wasn't there and everyone was looking into it.
Anna Delvey is on Dancing with the Stars.
Sheena Shay is not.
A lot of people were like,
how could they do this to Sheena again?
Anna Delvey is, what?
Why are you so poor?
Why do you dress like that?
You remember her, okay?
And she was the one that was a total grifter.
She lied about her childhood,
lied about where she was from,
and acted like she was so rich,
and stole money from investors,
and made her friend pay for this big vacation in Morocco
that the friend thought that she was being treated to.
The whole thing.
Anyway, she did time, they did the documentary about her,
and now she's on Dancing with the Stars,
but she is very pissed at Whoopi Goldberg,
because Whoopi Goldberg spoke about
it on The View and Whoopi said that, you know, that the ice, because she's not American,
allowed her to travel and be part of Dancing with the Stars.
And Whoopi's like, you know, would they let other people do that that was
in this situation? You know? And but Anna's like responded saying that she didn't get
any special treatment. And she explained that she finished her time in prison, was under
house arrest for three years and paid all the money back she owed the victims by March
of 2022. So anyway, I didn't know that she did pay back all the money.
So, you know, good for her, I guess.
So, you know, it's Dancing with the Grifters this year.
And of course they love that she has
an ankle bracelet still on.
And I can't wait to see the dance that they do
about like her breaking out from bars or whatever.
And then they're gonna bedazzle the,
you know, the ankle.
Like, it's like, dancing the cha-cha-cha at a delvy.
And then they'll like pan the camera
just like on a bedazzled,
like get through that tan character shoe
and then just the bedazzled ankle bracelet
and then she'll be up and, and you know, she looks good.
Her legs look nice.
She looks good in the dress.
So there you go with that.
Armie Hammer, once he's gonna be on Dancing with the Stars,
he could use it,
cause he was forced to sell his truck.
He can't afford the gas.
He said, he did a video about it.
This was about a week or two ago.
No, it was a week ago, August 27th.
Anyway, and you know, since he's not working,
since all the stuff happened with him being into cannibalism
and writing weird texts to multiple girls.
Well, Erica Jane, that's right, baby, Erica Jane,
she has shared that she was his neighbor at one point and had his number and was
like, hey, it's so loud. Can you stop playing all, you know, either invite me or stop being so loud?
Because she said two girls were fighting on the front lawn. One time when she rolled up over him
and he's like, hey, I'll I'm happy to come over and make you a steak. And then she said he got COVID.
And then she found out that he would like to make her a steak
and eat her rib afterwards.
And so she never heard from him again.
But what will it take for him to come back?
What do you guys think?
I've said from the very beginning,
I don't think this is the end for him.
I definitely think he'll start acting again soon, because I just,
I actually think the documentary about this whole scandal actually made him seem less horrible
than when it broke out on social media and we were just getting the, reading the text and all that other stuff.
I think when we saw everybody sort of share,
we were like, I don't know.
I don't think, I think he's a weirdo.
I wouldn't want my daughter to date him.
I wouldn't want Erica Jane to date him.
Erica Jane, she doesn't want to date someone
who doesn't even have a car.
He just had to sell his car.
I mean, that's not what she's looking for.
Please, as with Mr. Girardi,
I thought that man was gonna be in my life forever.
Thought I was gonna hold his hand until he died.
Well, look at me now.
It's expensive to be me.
So there you go.
Big weekend for Travis and Taylor.
They went, I don't know, there's so much going on.
They went to a wedding.
They went to the tennis thing.
They had the new cocktail that everyone's
dying over, which is vodka, lemonade, melon balls, and chambrond, whatever that purple-like.
Anyway, everyone's drinking at the tennis. They were drinking and having fun.
They're having a good time. A lot of people tried to say that she was in a fight with
Brittany Mahoney because they weren't in the same suites watching the game, but it's because they each have their own suite, because then they went to the tennis
together and they were asshole buddies again. So there you go. But you know, when's this
going to happen? The other, they wore a lot of Gucci. Travis was wearing a lot of Gucci
and it was this Gucci bucket hat and this Gucci collared shirt. And I don't know. I hope you got it for free.
There is also a Hallmark movie.
We heard that this was coming.
It's here, you guys.
It's gonna be on the Hallmark channel.
And it's gonna be on November 30th, just for the holidays.
And it is...
It's basically the story of Taylor and Travis.
So there's a blonde girl and a guy with some facial hair
and sitting on a football field in the chief's colors.
Cannot.
We have to watch that.
That's going to be a juicy scoop assignment.
And I don't even watch Hallmark movies,
but I'm going to have to watch that.
Tom Brady was doing broadcasting and everyone says he sucks. They said he was awful. They
can't believe that he got paid $32 million to do this job. I don't know if that's just
for one year, but whatever. They said he wasn't good. I saw a quick clip of him and he looked
cute. So that's all I care about.
Kendrick Lamar is going to headline the Super Bowl. I like his music a lot. I've never seen him in live,
but everyone says he's like an amazing performer.
So that's interesting.
Also, Marlon Waynes did an interview recently,
and I thought this was so interesting.
He said that when they were doing in living color,
for those of you that are not familiar
with living in color, it was completely groundbreaking.
And not just because JLo was one of these dancing girls that did between the sketches.
It was, I mean, I remember we would stop everything on a Sunday night in college to watch this.
So they did this thing where they had, according to Marlin,
they had like a special live episode of In Living Color
to air on Fox while the other network
was playing the Super Bowl.
And it was very, very edgy.
I mean, these sketches would never be allowed today,
but hilariously funny at the time. And funny
today, but just not appropriate. Anyway. And so people left the network where Super Bowl
was and went over to watch that. And so it was after that, that then the people that
produced the Super Bowl was like, we have to have really big halftime shows. And that's
when they started booking all the big stars. Really
not prior to that. So that was like, you know, early 90s. I never knew that. I never knew
that. But I remembered it. Now I can remember seeing it and remember hearing that that was
like quite the coup. And I thought that was pretty juicy. I'm watching a pretty juicy
show right now.
Definitely you guys, I need you to watch it
so we can discuss it because there's already some things
that bug me about it that I need to get off my chest
and talk about, but it's keeping my interest,
which is most important.
And it's on Netflix, it's called The Perfect Couple,
based on a book and with Nicole Kidman.
And it starts out, it's the rehearsal dinner
for a big wedding weekend for a rich family in Nantucket.
And there is a murder.
And then they flash back like a year before,
and you're trying to figure out who killed this person
and why, and you know it's not gonna be the obvious,
so you keep watching it.
But there's definitely some weird things about it
that I just need to talk about.
So I'm gonna give you guys a week to watch this.
It's a limited series.
And then we need to go off, okay?
Because it's, some things are very odd,
like the opening scene of them dancing,
like just so strange.
Casey Anthony, Top Mom. That's what Nancy Grace used
to call her. Casey Anthony, tot mom. Okay, she's a tot mom. And sad to remind you the
sad story. This is the again, another one she could be on Dancing with the Stars. They
have not asked her yet because she's not popular, so I can see that.
But because she was accused of killing her daughter.
But she did get off in the end.
And then recently she had a Netflix documentary where she blamed the death on her dad.
Said she had nothing to do with it and that they told this whole story that the dad did
it. Anyway, she is out having the time of her life
with her new boyfriend.
This is according to New York Post.
And apparently he blew off his wife of 20 years
to be with her and they're just really happy.
It has nothing to do with the wife.
They're just really having a great time.
And then in the article, it was like a source said that they saw them at a restaurant
and he said to her, bring that innocent ass over here. I'm like, no, he did not. No, I
don't believe that part of the story. Do I believe that they're together? Yeah. Do I
believe that maybe he left his wife of 20 years? Yeah. But I don't think you're at a
restaurant being like, hey, bring that innocent ass,
like you're innocent for killing your daughter.
Like if they're together,
they're never bringing up the fact
of what she lived through in the past.
They're just acting like it didn't happen.
That's my opinion.
All right, you guys,
we have so many other fun topics to discuss.
I have a new Juicy Scooper,
but she might not be new to all of you
because she opened for me a few times.
This tour, I love her. She's adorable and she's so funny. She's a great stand-up. Brittany Brave is here.
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All right, we are back with Brittany Brave.
Brittany, you're so adorable.
Thank you.
And tell everybody how we met.
Yeah, our success story, our love story.
We met in April of this year.
I had somebody from the Improv reach out and say,
Heather McDonald needs an opener this weekend.
I actually was going to ask them to be able to open for you.
Oh, really? I didn't know that.
Yeah, I was like, and then I think there was like a miscommunication
where one of the GMs of the improv said,
I thought she wanted a male opener,
didn't want a female opener,
because I know everyone has specifics
for who they want to open for them.
And I said, oh, okay.
And then literally two days later,
like one of the heads of the improv was like,
Heather needs an opener.
And I was like, absolutely.
And it was an interesting weekend for me too,
because I had just quit my radio job.
Oh.
Yeah.
And I had thrown together a big event for our morning
show that Friday night.
And then this came up, and they were like,
oh, do you want to open for Heather MacDonald?
And I was like, I absolutely do.
So bailed on that, rushed up to West Palm, and here we are.
Yeah.
Yes.
And then we did another couple shows in Florida.
Tampa and Orlando.
Yes.
Yes.
So you also, I don't know if you know this,
that Tampa crowd was so, I mean, they were so fun.
It was at the Hard Rock.
They were so wild.
A woman in the crowd was laughing so hard
during both of our sets and I think very drunk.
Somebody told me that she walked in with two drinks
and she threw up into her drinks because she was both drunk and I guess having
such a good time during our sets. And she threw up in her drink and then didn't leave
because she was having such a good time.
That's how great it is, you guys, to come see Stand Up.
It's CSI.
So, okay, you were just, right when you got here, you were reminding me of an interesting
story you had regarding P. Did were reminding me of an interesting story you had
Regarding P. Diddy. Yeah, tell that story. Okay, so earlier this summer like June I
Threw a roast of P. Diddy because obviously all these accusations came out that are all horrifying Even though people have been calling him out on this behavior for like over a decade, right?
And I myself I'm a domestic violence survivor too.
So I dated a monster for three years and sent him to jail,
got out, got a restraining order.
Wait, I don't know all this.
Yeah, I don't even know if I've ever told you.
Yeah, this was a couple years ago now.
But yeah, yeah, dark time.
Yeah, well wait, where is he now?
I think he's in Salt Lake City.
So he did his time.
He did his time, and then we went to court again,
and then he got off on a plea bargain,
which was like total bullshit.
But I have a restraining order,
and he's been out of my life now for five years.
Everyone's always like, is he dead?
I'm like, no, but he's living in Salt Lake City,
so that's close enough.
He's just surrounded by Mormon wives.
Right, well, thank God, we'll see him just surrounded by Mormon wives. Right, well, I give God,
we might see him on the new Mormon show.
You never know, yeah.
Secret lives of, listen, by Mormon girls,
beware of this person.
No, what, I just wanna ask a couple questions about that.
Yeah, absolutely.
So you found yourself in this relationship,
and then when did there come a time
where Britney Brave, you're brave enough
to just be like, I can't do this anymore?
Yeah, and Believe It or Not Brave is really my last name.
I think because I went through that,
and I also do stand up, everybody's always like,
what a killer stage name.
And I'm like, nope, just my Italian parents assimilated
when they moved here.
Yeah, we met when I was working in the music business.
I was a publicist at Columbia Records and Sony,
and he was a manager and met, he was a lot older than me.
He was like-
How much older?
17, 18 years.
So how old were you when you met him?
Mid-20s, early 20s, so he was 40.
That's such a big difference at that age.
Yeah, I agree.
If you were 40 and he was 55,
it's a whole different story, you know,
or even 35 and 50, but early 20s is,
yes, it's over 18, but wow, you know, it's young.
I say that all the time.
I'm always like, yeah, like 30 to 40,
then you're kind of more or less at the same place in life.
And the funny part is when I told even just my mom,
you know, about the age difference
and that he had been married once and divorced,
which there's nothing wrong with that.
But also he had a seven-month-old baby daughter,
like with his baby mama.
Oh, so, God.
Yeah, who is actually a former Playboy bunny,
and she's wonderful, Deanna Brooks.
Yeah, so we're friends now when we...
And did you become friends once?
And did he tell you awful things about her?
Yeah, and he, so it was such classic DV.
Like the thing about these relationships
is they're always very textbook.
Okay, so tell us the textbooks.
So for instance,
I'm very lucky to never have experienced anything like this.
Yeah, totally.
But let's share.
So one of the number one things, and I look for it,
I think it's like the biggest red flag in dating now,
is whenever a person is unable to,
if not speak highly of their ex,
that whole dragging of their ex,
and like they're the problem, they were crazy.
It's a huge red flag for me
anytime a man calls a woman crazy now,
because that's usually like, well, what did you do to warrant that reaction?
You know, and did she call you out on your shit?
Did she send you to jail?
Did she get a restraining order?
So obviously no two cases are worth the same.
Were you cheating and she looked at your phone?
Literally.
Yeah.
That's yeah, no drama please.
It's like, no, that's not drama.
You were cheating.
You were cheating and you got caught.
I remember one time I literally caught him
red-handed cheating and he said, he goes,
yeah, the issue is that you talk to my friends
and you go looking.
And I'm like, that's like getting caught for murder
and on trial being like, well, if you didn't show up
to the scene of the crime, I wouldn't be here.
Like that's the same logic.
But that's number one red flag is he always spoke really badly of her.
She was crazy, she was over-emotional,
she was hiding the kid from him.
It was, like, so dramatic.
Number two, she warned me.
She had reached out once she figured out
that we were dating, and I got, like, 13 DMs.
And it was like, oh, you're the new girlfriend.
Well, well, well.
And honestly, it foreshadowed so much And it was like, oh, you're the new girlfriend. Well, well, well.
And honestly, it foreshadowed so much of the relationship.
But at that time, you weren't going to receive it
because you were believing that she was crazy.
So you're like, of course you're jealous of me
and you're gonna try to like ruin our love.
Of 100%.
And it's like, I also was like young.
It was the first time I was really in love.
He was a lot older that always got thrown in my face.
It was always like, well, you wouldn't know.
You've never been married.
You wouldn't know.
I'm older than you.
I've lived more life than you.
And yeah, when you're in love with someone,
your rose-colored goggles are on, right?
So I remember it feeling weird,
and I definitely brought him the DMs.
Let's chat about this. I remember it feeling weird and I definitely brought him the DMs like
Let's chat. Yeah about this. Some of this is concerning and he was like crazy and this and that and
But the thing is like you can't hide you can only hide that behavior and that toxicity for so long and literally
He was moved into my apartment before I so wait
Older guy, but he moves in with you? Oh, he wasn't rich.
Not at all.
He talked a big game and...
So was there a love bombing aspect to this as well?
A thousand percent.
Tell me how that happened.
Oh my God.
You're the love of my life.
Right off the bat.
Right off the bat.
I'm obsessed with you.
I've never met anybody like you, and if you're
like in your mid-twenties and a young girl and you've never been in love before.
See, I think love bombing can happen to anybody.
Anybody!
Because I think it's like someone just tells you how great you are and you're like, finally
somebody gets me!
Exactly!
Like, I agree!
Exactly!
I agree I'm gorgeous, I agree this body should be wanting to be banged every day.
I've been waiting my whole life for someone to be obsessed with me. Yeah, finally
Finally, yeah, and also like in 2024 like dating has changed so much
It's so hard to even get guys now to like express interest or make a plan or follow through
Right. Yes when you do have a guy in front of you who you're into and he's into you
I feel like everybody gets a lot bombed nowadays.
It's so common.
But it was a lot.
It's funny because my mom and everybody around me was like, this is a lot, quickly.
And my parents were like, we don't understand why a 40-year-old man is moving in with his
23, 24-year-old girlfriend.
Why is he not with his seven month old daughter?
Where is the mother of his child?
All very valid obvious.
Do you have other kids with the first wife?
No.
No kids with the first wife.
Okay, just the one baby.
Yep.
And did he have any visitation
which then you played stepmom to?
I did.
I played stepmom a little bit in the relationship.
I mean, he was a deadbeat on every front.
I remember having to remind him of his own daughter's birthday.
It was crazy.
I was like, her birthday is next week?
And he was like, oh, right.
And I'm like, are you going to visit?
Are you going to do something?
So yeah, I was super in love.
And he moved into my apartment.
It was like, I really want to stay with you for the summer in New York.
He had said he was living in LA at the time.
Later learned he was evicted, did not have a place to live.
He was actually with his parents in Lubbock, Texas.
Like, it was every part of his life,
as the relationship went on, just, like, fell apart.
Like, every, nothing added up.
Yeah, everything. Nightmare.
So then when did it turn to a violent situation?
Situation. So honestly, it was about six months in.
Around three months in is when I started having some trust issues.
Like just, you know, weird text messages from girls,
stories not adding up.
Was he like a good looking charming guy so that he could get girls to be interested in him,
I assume?
No, to be honest.
He was like not ugly,
but I guess if I were to give him credit,
like he knew how to talk to people.
He was a manager in show business.
Right.
You know what I mean? So like he was very smart.
He was good at his job.
I think he knew how to like schmooze and talk to people.
And I think at some point when you're like
in your early 20s, mid 20s,
an older guy is really like appealing to you.
You're like, oh, he has his shit together and he's older
and there won't be as many games,
which I guess to his credit in pursuing me,
there weren't games.
But yeah, he was like, oh, I wanna come hang out with you
for the summer in New York. And I said, Okay, but you should probably still stay with your
friends. We're still just dating early on. And then I don't know, before I knew
it, he was moved in, basically living in New York, we were fully together. And
then yeah, there was one night where he went out, lied about where he was going.
I don't know why.
It clearly was up to something
that he didn't want me to know.
Came home, hammered drunk, like early,
like 8 p.m. comes home, hammered, probably coked out.
There was a huge, there was obviously
substance abuse issues too.
And I just kind of caught him in a lie,
and I said, well, I don't know why you would lie
about going to this happy hour.
Like, I didn't accuse you of anything.
I didn't have any issues.
And he just went from like zero to 100.
And he tried to like shove me out of my own apartment.
He tried to, he was like, it's never gonna be enough.
I didn't do it.
He was like irrational, so drunk.
And I was near the door of my apartment
because I wanted to go for a walk
and he pushed me out of my own apartment.
And when I tried to get back in,
he closed the door on my hand.
Yeah.
And I was like, okay, that was the first incident.
And then we walked back from that.
I'm sorry, I was too drunk.
I did lie, I shouldn't have lied.
I really wasn't, all the textbook stuff. And then it just, it got bad. It was too drunk. I did lie. I shouldn't have lied. I really wasn't...
All the textbook stuff.
And then it just, it got bad.
It was really bad.
Like, to the point where I didn't even really want to send him to jail.
I just wanted to get a restraining order when I was ready to go.
And when I presented all the evidence, death threats, domestic incident reports, every
time I had to call the cops on him because he was out of control, the detective I worked with in New York was like,
oh, he needs to go to jail.
Like, this is aggravated harassment, harassment, assault.
This is, like, out of your hands now.
So here we are. Yeah.
And it also sounds like you finally had a detective
that cares. You often hear that people don't,
you know, they're like, oh, we need more or whatever. detective that cares, you often hear that people don't,
they're like, oh, we need more or whatever. So then he got arrested.
Yeah, and I left, I literally fled.
I flew to Salt Lake City for one last weekend
to try to work it out, even though everybody in my life
at this point was so over him, at some point,
the relationships like this isolate you from everybody.
They were like, okay, we can't get through to her.
Like we're just, you know, she keeps trying to leave,
he keeps coming back, she keeps coming back.
It's like such a vicious, hard cycle.
When I went to Salt Lake City, it was supposed to be
our hurrah, let's heal, let's rekindle weekend.
And of course, like a day in, he's a violent drunk monster again.
Really bad.
And I, when he was busy watching TV, I stepped outside of his apartment, called American
Airlines, switched my flight silently.
He had no idea.
And then I got out of bed at like 3 330 in the morning when he was like dead asleep
Finished packing and left like I was supposed to stay like two more days and I just the light switch
Went off so like my advice always to girls or people in this situation is like you do have the strength to leave you can
Leave and also if your friends or you're near somebody who's going through something like this like they will they will leave but a lot
Of the times you have to arrive at that conclusion on your own,
which I did.
Yeah.
But I literally, he woke up and I was gone.
And by the time I had landed in New York,
I had him blocked on everything.
And I just went straight to the courthouse
in Dumbo, Brooklyn.
And I was like, please help me.
And then did he get arrested in Salt Lake?
So he got arrested a month later.
It was, the messed up thing is even if there's multiple incidents
across the country, which there were,
because we lived in LA for a little time together,
there were incidents in Salt Lake,
incidents in Miami where I live now.
Obviously New York can only rule over New York
and that jurisdiction.
So I knew he was gonna visit a month later.
I had just restart my life.
I had just moved to a new area of Brooklyn.
He knew the neighborhood,
but he had no idea what the cross street subway stops were.
And the detective said, okay, well, when he's in town,
we have to serve him the restraining order
and we'll arrest him.
We have to do it in person.
I said, okay.
So I was working with my detective all week,
like using context clues through like burner accounts,
mutual friends to try to find him,
to get them to just serve him and arrest him.
And this is so much, I know,
I've never told you any of this.
No, no.
This...
I went to a new client show at Gramercy Theater in New York
and I told my detective, I know he's going to be here.
And the detective's, a couple of them were...
Wait, what do you mean a new show? You were performing.
I was still a publicist at the time. I hadn't even started a comedy.
Oh, okay.
And I was like, I have a feeling he's going to show up.
He knows I like this band. He knows.
And they were like, okay, yeah, yeah, okay.
And I was like, really?
Like, I'm telling you guys, I know him.
He's gonna try to see me while he's in New York.
This is where he's gonna pull up.
Sure enough, halfway through the show,
I get a text from him.
He took a picture of me in the crowd.
And he's like, I'm here.
I'm afraid to say hi to you,
but I was hoping we could...
I freak out.
Detectives don't have my back in this moment.
They're not there.
I'm crying.
I run out of the venue.
The next morning he called, he's like, please see me,
love you, we can work at all the usual crap.
Called my detective, I'm like, this is last day in New York,
this is our last chance, if you're gonna serve him
and we're gonna, this is the last opportunity.
Female detective, she goes.
And this was just, this was just a serve
so that you could be granted the restraining order.
And then you were kind of like,
hey, what happens after that is your deal.
A hundred percent.
Okay, got it.
Yeah, and also they were planning to arrest him
on aggravated harassment, harassment and assault.
Those were the three charges.
And I called her and I said,
he really, he somehow figured out where I live, not surprising,
and he picked a bar on the block of my new apartment.
Again, have no idea how he figured this out.
And he said, please just come meet me for a drink,
please just talk to me.
And the detective said, text him right now and tell him,
sure, I'll meet you, give me 20 minutes.
And I told him that and he said, okay.
And then instead of me meeting him at the bar,
it was two women, two.
Two women who walked up to him and were like,
close your tab.
And he was like, what's happening?
And they were like, what's happening is you're under arrest.
And arrested him at the bar,
served him the restraining order, and here we are.
So he thought...
Yeah.
His girlfriend slash victim turned survivor slash detective was going
to meet him, forgive him, and fall in love again.
And instead, he spent the night in jail.
Yeah, and he was in jail for a couple weeks because it wasn't actually the first time
that he had gone to jail because I had to call the cops because of a terrible incident.
And he blew through everybody in his life
that he could have called for bail money.
Like he had nobody left.
Wow.
He isolated, crappy person,
he isolated his clients, his friends, everybody,
he had nobody left.
Yeah, it was, and it's a mix of emotions too,
because it's like empowering, freeing,
oh my God, I finally did it.
Like I really, that's why I was so anxious that week
and working so closely with the detectives
to get this stuff locked in and arrest him
and give him the order, because I was like,
finally for the first time in three years,
I saw the light and I was really ready to leave.
And I'm like, please, like end this for me
while I feel strong enough to get out of this, right?
And then yeah, he eventually got bailed out of jail
and then we went back to court three months later
and he got off on a plea bargain.
He basically pled guilty to one of the charges
and he did anger management, some fines,
some community service, all that kind of stuff.
But yeah, I currently have a restraining order.
He can't come near me.
And he is not tried or violent?
He is not tried, thank God.
I will say that, he is not tried.
I think I've truly scared him finally, yeah.
Good.
Yeah.
You should be on that, there's a new show on Netflix,
The Worst Ex Ever or something.
I should be on that.
That's a word.
I've seen a couple. I've seen a couple.
That's the worst.
I've seen a couple.
They're like little documentary one episode segments.
And I would love if they did a new host.
I'm here.
It's not a host.
They can do your story though.
I would, yeah, I would love to.
Yeah.
Okay, so now getting back to,
so now you're doing standup.
Yes.
You've been doing it for how long?
Four, four and a half years, something like that. So do you're doing stand-up. Yes. You've been doing it for how long? For four and a half years, something like that.
So did you start to stand up after this chapter
of your life ended?
I did, because the first couple of things
I really wanted to joke about were like,
the first jokes I wrote are like really dark
and about this experience.
And like, I would tell my friends
and they'd be crying, laughing.
And they were like, can you tell everyone now?
Oh, yeah.
I have like, like one of my jokes is like, I sent him to jail,
and I was like,
the judge was like 25 to life,
and my first thought was,
oh my God, he's finally so committed.
Like, just like,
just like,
and I'm like,
I got to see him in handcuffs,
and I was like,
oh, to think you were the one
that never wanted this to get serious.
Like, certain things like that,
and I talk about how like,
I'm a rescue dog now
because of that relationship.
And I had a really funny story when I was trying
to get my restraining order.
I was sitting next to a girl, Deep Brooklyn.
We were at family court.
And she was like, why are you here?
And she's like a very Brooklyn girl.
Yeah.
Like really, she's like, why are you here?
And I was like, my boyfriend hit me and he was kinda crazy. So I'm trying to get a restraining order to end this. And she's like, okay, I go, why are you here? And I was like, my boyfriend hit me and he's kinda crazy,
so I'm trying to get a restraining order to end this.
And she's like, okay, I go, why are you here?
And she was like, I need to get a restraining order
against my man and his new girl,
cause I'm pissed he moved on and I don't like her.
So if I get a restraining order against them,
then they grant it to me and I can fuck them up
and nobody can do nothing.
And in my head I'm like, I don't think that's how and then you're like
and this is and this is why sometimes the detectives will say we need more man
because there's people like that yeah I was like you go girl but like so funny
like such a New York girl cuz she immediately had my back she's like does
he live in New York and I was like nobody comes here a lot for work she was
like if I see him I'ma fuck him up.
She was like, I'll find him, I'll kill him, I will.
And it was so funny,
because the poor thing walks in the courthouse
and then walks out and looks at me,
she goes, ugh, they didn't give it to me.
Well, that's the other thing
that people also need to realize is
if you are granted a restraining order,
it is very hard for all these reasons.
It is.
If you're the person that is trying to, where they're trying to get it against you, you
don't want it because it is on your record.
It will show up on things.
So that's why other people will fight it.
And it is a big deal.
It is.
And it's also too, like if you're the one who, and this is where it's twisted, if you
request the restraining order and it's given to you, that person can't come near you,
but you can choose to break it at any point. Which honestly, but domestic violence happens a lot
because it's such a vicious cycle. And there's so many mind games and there's vulnerability
and you're not in your obviously best physical
and mental state when you're with somebody for that long.
But then obviously if you break your own restraining order
that you got, that's obviously gonna work against you
should something else happen.
It's very, I mean one time when I went in to go renew it
I got told no.
Because the first time I had a female judge
and she effortlessly granted it.
And rolled her eyes at everything he said in court. Like the usual like, well she provoked me, no because the first time I had a female judge and she effortlessly granted it and like rolled
her eyes at everything he said in court like the usual like well she provoked me well she's
crazy and the end she was such a badass she was like oh okay okay like but the next time
I had a male judge and he was like well I don't know he's been on his best behavior
he didn't break the restraining order and I'm like I understand that but I also want
to like keep it in place because I'd like to continue living my life
free of his presence.
And I had to really contest it for a couple months and stuff.
So it's all, it's crazy.
So you have it, and you have it for how much longer now?
It's indefinite now.
Oh, okay, great.
Yeah, like I'm fine now, but I had to like,
and I could have also pursued bigger charges,
and one of my DV advocates really like wanted me to
But then I spoke to somebody else and they were like listen you do have a case like there's a lot of things that you
Could also address and press charges, and if you really want to like
Send them to jail forever like you could you have a case
But they're like also consider what you're putting yourself through. Right, exactly. And like you're probably ready to move on, right?
And I'm like yeah.
And they're like probably just like take your restraining order.
It'll keep him away from you and just try to start a new chapter.
Yeah.
Instead of like put yourself through the wringer again.
Right, exactly.
Yeah, I started comedy after that.
I did.
Yeah, trauma.
That's why everyone goes trauma.
I go yeah, that's really what led me to stand up specifically.
So yeah. Well comedy is tragedy plus trauma. I go, yeah, that's really what led me to stand up specifically. So, yeah.
Well, comedy is tragedy plus time.
I'm saying. Yeah.
Now, when you first started this story, you were saying you did a, like, a comedic roast?
Or what was this about?
It was a roast of P. Diddy.
So, that story, I hope, gives, like, that kind of context.
Because obviously I'm really passionate about DV and helping survivors and victims.
And I was really upset about all the stuff
coming out about P. Diddy, and I think I was even more upset
about some of my friends' reactions.
People I considered friends being like,
well, we don't know if he's guilty.
Right.
And I'm like, did you see the hotel footage?
I don't know.
And it was just upsetting for me, given what I went through.
So I was like, I just want to roast his ass.
I want to get a bunch of comics.
And I just want to like write jokes.
All the tickets will go to charity,
the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
And all the comics were on board.
It was great.
They were like, this will be fun, fun writing exercise.
Like, yeah, let's roast this billionaire pedophile abuser.
And the bar that I ended up picking in Miami,
on board immediately, they were like, let's do it.
I was only in town for one week,
and that week they were already speaking to 50 cent
about a potential promotional appearance
for his new cognac.
And they were like, if we could pull this off,
this would be like, if we can align the dates,
I even canceled the gig in DC.
They were like, we can get him to come by.
We'll tell him the roast is happening and maybe he'll,
and he did.
Like we couldn't announce that he was coming,
but we could tease it.
And then yeah, night of the show, he rolled up.
He knew it was a roast.
He knew it was for charity.
He was like a hundred percent I want to be there.
And it was great, because we got a bunch of national coverage.
We raised more money than we would have.
It was wild, crazy.
Yeah.
I hit on 50 Cent.
I flirted with him.
It was great.
I've hung out with 50, too.
He's sweet.
Yes.
We hung out for a few weeks, because he was dating Chelsea.
I remember that. And he was totally a nice delight. Yeah was dating Chelsea. I remember that.
And he was totally a nice delight.
That's all I can say.
He's so nice.
And he was so nice to the comics, especially once he learned about the cause and stuff.
He was like 100 percent, I mean he's also a famed Diddy hater so I'm sure the petty
side of him was like, yeah.
But also he was like, this is a great cause, absolutely.
And afterwards he was like, I could never be a comedian.
What you guys just did was so great.
And then I got someone from his team's number,
and they were like, he wants to party with you.
And I was like, ah!
But yeah, anyways, nothing happened.
I wish it did.
I should have.
But anyway.
OK, well, I want to tell you about this book called
There is No Ethan.
This is from the New York Post.
It's based on a true story.
Okay.
So, I've actually, this story is just fascinating.
So, these three women found each other
because they realized they were all being catfished
by this guy named Ethan.
So it was an Ethan.
Ethan was actually a female gynecologist
who, when she's not working as a medical doctor,
did this for fun.
Created, so would create, you know, whatever,
a stock photo of some guy or something. Yeah.
And went on dating sites, met the women,
and never, I guess, never did FaceTime,
or maybe never talked on the phone,
which I always think that's weird.
Like, how long do you go?
And I've never experienced, you know,
apps and stuff like that.
I don't really use them.
But how long would you go solely texting
in a relationship before you're like,
hey, either we get on the phone or you're fake.
So, you know, but she did, I haven't read the book,
but she did waste these girls' times, these women's times.
And they let the hospital know and everything.
And they're like, well, we looked into it
and it was 10 years ago.
And we think that she's done really well and it's fine.
And I'm like, and the thing about this is,
I listened to this great long podcast about it.
From the podcast called Something Was Wrong.
And it was like several episodes in it.
And it was about a girl that pretended to,
she would present herself as a guy online.
Just lead women on?
And then would become physical friends with the girl.
Oh wow.
And sometimes there were several girls.
And sometimes she would do it with them.
She'd become their roommate.
Yeah.
And the whole time, she's also catfishing them.
She would be like in the bed next to them watching a movie,
just as friends.
Yeah.
They were like, is she a lesbian or what?
And she'd be texting them back as the guy.
And the thing is that both of that story and this
is that she would, that these women that present to be guys
to a straight, to a girl who thinks
they're in a straight relationship with someone,
they create all this drama.
They're like, nevermind, you clearly don't want me.
They both faked cancer.
Oh my God.
That's crazy.
Cancer, like being ill.
And then, so then these girls are like,
well, I can't leave him now.
Sometimes there's different characters that they'll play.
So then they also are suddenly friends with the fake boyfriend's cousin.
And it's all the person.
And it's all this one person who's doing it.
And it's a girl.
But in both of these cases, one which was, but in both the cases, when the victims tried to get police involved,
it isn't really a crime.
Because unless they tried to like extort money from you or harm you, which they didn't, they
just wasted your time.
It was just a full blown emotional cyber abuse And faking who they are. You know, in the case of the story
from the podcast, there was a guy and he's like, oh my God, because somebody found his
face and he's like, she's doing this again? Oh wow. She's used my face before to fake
out women. That's not a crime though, like using somebody else's likeness and image,
like that's gotta be the one thing that, right?
Right, there's something a little bit there,
but still it's just a very, you know,
sometimes these crimes, my sister's
a criminal defense attorney, she's like,
so many of these things were not caught up yet
with what's happening.
So there isn't like law precedence for, it's like,
and they're just kinda like, can you just change your number?
Can you just block this?
And then, totally.
But then the victims are like,
yeah, but she has a sickness.
Yeah.
She's done this now to four other women.
Yeah.
And so this woman has a book out and this is the doctor.
That's insane.
So she's professionally a gynecologist.
A female doctor for female body parts.
So you're saying to me she makes great money.
She's a professional gynecologist day in and day out.
She's interacting with women already
in arguably one of the most vulnerable settings.
Yeah, that's not enough.
I also wanna like, and the joy that-
Mentally ruin them.
That's crazy.
And what I think is so crazy that it's a woman
is when you've seen this happen before
with men pretending to be successful
or pretending, getting women to fall in love
with them as a game.
Or even with regular grifter people
that get joy out of seeing you be excited
because you think you're gonna be part
of this big business that's a scam or whatever they get off on it or a guy that's like
taking his girlfriend or even in person a guy that's like taking the girlfriend
to see houses I always think that's sad it's always seems like realtors have to
deal with a lot of weird grifters too I'm sure that's always this and so now
you're like and I think they get off on seeing the realtor think like oh god
I've been I've had my license for a year,
and I finally say I might have the sale.
Like, it's such a weird, and so I think.
I mean, I live in Miami, so that's the capital
for everything you're talking about right now.
Like literally everything you do.
Every man's like a character from Grand Theft Auto.
Everybody's trying to sell you on a business plan,
and then you're like, so what is it you do?
And they're like, I'm just out here grinding,
connecting the dot, and you're like, this isn't, you do? And they're like, I'm just out here grinding, connecting the dots.
And you're like, this isn't,
all of a sudden all the money in your account's wired out.
So I get it, I'm around it.
I'm constantly dodging it in Miami all the time.
But I find whether it's a man or a woman,
but more intriguing that it's a woman.
Very, yeah.
To just, so you end your hard day of being a medical doctor
and then you're like getting in weird text fights
with an attractive woman who thinks
this might be her boyfriend.
Like she makes him, oh, the one thing that she also did
is she made him Jewish and she found a Catholic girl,
got the Catholic girl to fall in love with her.
Got her to convert to Judaism?
But then was like, well, to really hurt her.
It's not going to work if my mother won't accept you.
Yeah.
Well, that's believable.
And so I drag.
I've gone through that personally.
But I'm saying just the tactical ways to seeking out this girl
to go almost like seeing, OK, I'm on the Tinder or whatever.
Yeah.
And I don't know what side it was,
but I'm on the Tinder and I'm as this fake guy
and I'm seeking out girls to and sees this person
and is like, oh, I'll pursue this one
because then in five weeks, I
will break her heart.
And won't that be fun for me on a Tuesday night
while I'm alone in my bed?
That's why.
And this is?
Does she?
And she doesn't have any sexual interest
in sleeping with women?
Because my first?
We don't know that part, because it's just,
we'd have to read the book.
Yeah.
But it's just, hey, if you're the author, come write me, let's have you on.
But like I...
Also does she have like, does this gynecologist
have high levels of testosterone in her body?
Cause this is like straight male behavior.
To just want to like play mind games
with a poor woman and waste her time.
I mean, I think it's a level of,
I think there's soon there'll probably be some type of like real diagnosis
in this day and age, but it's a level of being a troll,
being, having like several identities,
of playing with people's emotions somehow
that you'll never really meet.
Yeah.
And you also won't suffer any real consequence,
cause like you said, there's no way to really arrest her.
I mean, in this case, I don't know
if she knew any of these women personally
as her normal person.
In the other case I talked about,
that girl was like roommates with them.
And quite literally in bed with these people,
like as friends.
Yes, as friends.
That's crazy. I feel like also the number one red flag is like
I feel like both of these women in this scenario would be the kind of woman that's like I don't have a lot of
female friends or something. They'd probably be like all my friends are met because this is like to just want to like ruin
women's lot like this is insane. It's serious. And it's just such a cool thing because like you said like love and dating is so hard yeah and then you you
create this person that sounds great looks great same with the other case like
they if you know she would create a guy to then like pursue her friend yeah that
she knows a friend would like like you know, if they're in a more conservative town,
she made him a little edgy and liberal with some tats.
Sure, sure, sure.
And if it's in Austin, then he obviously works in tech
or something.
They just created this where it was like,
oh my god, actually?
This guy's perfect for me.
Yeah.
And this is wild.
I don't even know where to.
And it was always like an accident.
I was gonna meet you, but now I got in this car accident
and then it's like, okay, should I drive all this way
and see you?
And then, oh no, my phone was dead.
Sorry that you already drove back.
I didn't know that now whenever I have A,
either a new female friend or B, God forbid, I need to switch gynecologists. I didn't know that now whenever I have A, either a new female friend or B, God forbid I need to switch gynecologists.
I didn't know that one of the preliminary questions
needs to be like, what are you doing your free time?
That's right, can I hook you up to a lie detector machine
to see who you really are?
This is crazy, although it does give me a little bit of hope
because I've always joked for years that I'm like,
we need a really good diabolical female character. that I'm like, we need a really good like diabolical female character.
I'm always like, we need a female serial killer.
The most famed serial killers are always like men,
like the Zodiac Killer or like John.
I think that's what makes it fascinating because as-
It's a woman.
Yeah, and women can be horrible.
Women can be narcissists, women can be horrible,
women can be evil, women can lie, women can fake.
You know.
It really breaks my heart.
But there aren't as, the percentage is down.
It's always gonna be a little bit less
just because it just is.
Yeah.
But there's evil bitches out there.
This is crazy.
This is insane.
And I also feel like catfishing, like dating in 2024,
everyone kind of cat, same way like in 2024, everyone kind of cat,
same way like love bombing,
everyone kind of love bombs, I feel.
Like men just kind of love bomb.
Like it's, I feel like it happens to everybody.
And I feel like catfishing happens to everybody too.
Like even on a smaller scale,
you think a guy is one way and then he's not.
Like I have so many girlfriends who go through that.
They're like, I thought he had his shit together.
And then three months in, I'm paying for everything or surprise.
There's a kid or something.
So this is like my this my friend's daughter, she's a teenager.
And she's like, we went to go play
the sport against this very rich L.A. prestigious school.
Yeah. And this one girl was just horrible, horrible, mean, awful, just like the meanest. They couldn't believe how mean this was. was just horrible. Horrible, mean, awful.
Just like the meanest, they couldn't believe
how mean this girl was.
Yeah.
And so then on the whole bus ride back,
they went and looked up her Instagram
and she comes from famous parents.
And she goes, but she's totally catfishing.
Her Instagram doesn't look anything like
what she looked like as this 16 year old girl but she has these famous parents and she's
just a mean person so she's like we didn't care looking her up and being
like she's a fucking liar because it was just and I of course know all she's
talking about what I'm gonna say on the show oh yeah totally yeah I was like oh
my god like what and they're at this like, you know, prestigious Christian school
and then I'm just a horrible mean girl.
But-
That's crazy.
This is insane.
I just wish people would find a regular hobby
instead of just doing this.
It's great.
Well, we had like in Miami, we had,
it's not quite catfishing, but it's crazy.
And it's like one of our biggest scandals
in our comedy scene.
So there was a girl who, it's just comedy
and I think like she had some issues with like partying
and drinking and stuff like that.
But it would never kind of add up.
Like whenever she acted badly, it was one of two excuses.
It was either like, oh, well, I'm sorry.
I really need to get clean and I know that my drinking
and my drug use is out of control.
Or when she would do something shitty,
it was the opposite, where it was like,
okay, well, I'm recently clean, so I'm still trying to get,
like, the story's never added up,
and she always used her partying as an excuse
for, like, her crazy behavior.
I, from the day I met her, I thought I got, like,
a weird vibe from the whole, in her face,
and her vibe, and everything. I was like, I don't, this, I was like, she really looks like she would whole, in her face and her vibe and everything.
I was like, I don't, this, I was like,
she really looks like she would be like
Casey Anthony's accomplice.
Like, she really, crazy energy.
So like, she would do, she borrowed my friend's car one day.
She was supposed to bring it back at the end of the day.
She went off grid on her, ghosted her.
Her phone didn't die, brought the car back two days later.
My friend was literally about to call the police.
And she goes, what is wrong with you?
Like I told you you could borrow my car for a day.
She goes, oh yeah, well I ran errands
and I saw some friends and like what?
And she goes, like are you a sociopath?
Like you just didn't answer me for two days?
Then she got caught pocketing money from a hotel
that hired her on South Beach to run a comedy night.
She was getting like thousands of dollars, none of the comics got paid. pocketing money from a hotel that hired her on South Beach to run a comedy night.
She was getting like thousands of dollars,
none of the comics got paid.
They all-
Wait, and this girl's a standup too.
Sort of.
That was like producing a night of standup.
Producing a night of standup.
At a club or something, and a restaurant.
Okay, got it.
And a bunch of the comedians called the hotel,
and they were like, we never got paid.
And they're like, what are you talking about?
We give her like three grand a month.
Like, and they were like, are you, first off,
she's only giving me a hundred dollars they were like second
like what so pocketed all the money and then we turn on our local news in Miami
there's a guy old guy he's at a column forever and it's called help me Howard
okay and it's one crazy crap like this happens that's like, not quite illegal or it is, but
you're not getting an answer and you just need to get to the bottom of it.
And this girl is on Help Me Howard.
She was house sitting for somebody and when they came home, she had stolen a bunch of
their jewelry, a bunch of their items, including an urn that had the woman's dead one-month-old ashes.
And she threw the ashes out.
To keep the urn.
To keep the urn, because I guess the urn was fancy
and like worth my, and then brought it to a pawn shop.
And luckily the hero in the story
was the man who ran the pawn shop.
It was like, this is weird.
Like when people walk in with like, oh, a Tiffany necklace, an urn
that has like remaining baby ashes in it.
Like random things.
And then yeah, like she got like put on the,
and like the craziest part about it
is like she's taken no accountability
and she's like, I was framed.
Literally like the whole situation.
Wait, did she ever get arrested or anything?
I think she ended up getting arrested at one point and going to jail for like a little bit, I was framed. Literally, like, the whole situation. Wait, did she ever get arrested or anything?
I think she ended up getting arrested at one point
and going to jail for, like, a little bit,
but even still, like, she still to this day will be like...
Is she still in Miami?
Still in Miami.
I would think that she would go somewhere else.
You would think she'd relocate, but literally...
Like, be the grifter that goes somewhere else
and starts a whole new thing.
No, she literally was on the local news,
and all of us were like, we knew it.
We knew she was like super sketchy and a fraud.
And then like that night she was showing up to open mics
with like a white claw in her hand.
And we were like, what?
Next she'll be on Dancing with the Stars.
Well next she'll be framed for catfishing her friends
or something, yeah.
But like, I just think it's like insane.
Like people can live like these double lives. Like, I mean, I just think it's insane. People can live these double lives.
I mean, I lived it in my relationship.
When I left him, I had to pull a background check on him.
And he always said that he moved around a lot,
because he was a tour manager.
And he worked in music.
And he would relocate and whatever.
Absolutely not.
He was literally running from the law for years, Heather.
And I saw it on his background check.
So the world is weird.
Everyone's a con artist.
Did you hear about the Risa Tisa thing?
Risa Tisa was this woman and she did a 50 part,
10 minute series on TikTok about her horrible man
that she was either married to.
Who the fuck did I marry is what it was called.
Oh, funny.
And he was a liar and he would do all these things.
Anyway, they just start, they're gonna make that a movie.
Oh yeah, and I'll be first in line.
Yeah.
I will be first in line.
I'm ready for the remake, I'll audition.
Speaking of documentaries, the Fyre Festival.
Remember the Fyre Festival?
Oh my, yeah.
It's back.
You know the first thought in my head
when you said Fyre Festival was not even like
the tragedy of the money lost,
it was that disgusting sandwich. Well, he's back. He says it's going to happen in April. Yeah of
2025 they found an island
But it has it's much better than what they had before because it actually has like hotels and stuff on it. Okay, they already sold
They already do to sellout at the $4.99 price. So for the tour,
they don't know who they're doing it, but he goes, I have a real company that's doing it.
I'm working towards paying back the $25 million restitution. And he's like, people probably want
to come because even if it is a disaster, then they want to be They just wanna see. Then they wanna be on the front lines of the disaster
with the TikTok going viral with the cheese sandwiches.
He goes, we will have cheese sandwiches,
but they'll be like really gourmet and delicious.
And you can, there is even packages
as high as $1.1 million,
which will include a luxury yacht and scuba diving.
And I don't know how you get up to $1.1 million,
but maybe you meet, maybe you have a private concert or something with somebody.
They don't know who the people are.
Maybe $1.1 million, that package just guarantees you may get out of Fyre Festival alive.
It's like insurance for your own life.
But you promise you'll survive, and you'll get out of here.
I will say this, if anybody who goes to Fyre Festival too, if anything goes wrong in their
experience,
I don't want to hear about it.
You're a glutton for punishment if you go back to this.
I cannot imagine that they figured it all out.
Something is going to go wrong at this festival.
Not to be a pessimist, but I don't know.
I mean, again, he'll probably be on Dancing with the Stars
next year. Sure.
Because he looks pretty cute.
He thinned out.
It's a lot cuter than he did before.
And but yeah, all this stuff, it's just like, well, yeah, if I if you're I could see why
someone would go, let's go, especially if they're big influencers will document the
whole thing.
Yeah.
If it's a total great delight, great.
And if it's a disaster, then great.
So I think that's kind of the plan.
I'm hoping it's a disaster, selfishly.
I really am, just for the material.
I am, absolutely.
Well, and I think it's like, I mean,
talk about leaning in to whatever happened.
Like, I guess they're leaning into it,
they're accepting that it was an absolute disaster,
absolute shit show a couple years ago.
But it's like how, I don't even, and the funny part is, is like in my head, if you were going
to make a comeback with a festival like this, you wouldn't, like, wouldn't you want to ease
into it a little bit?
Wouldn't you want to not be immediately lavish with $1.1 million packages?
Like I would be like, how about you just confirm a lineup?
How about you just get hotels like locked in? you just get hotels, like, locked in?
Like, you know what, like, let's ease back into Fire Festival.
I think whenever there's something celebrity-driven,
I think there is an element of international people
that have so much money from whatever country
that they're like, I go, I'll go.
You know, I'll go for the 1.1 million or whatever.
I guess that's true.
Disposable income.
Why not try it?
If we get someone, then we'll just charter the yacht,
and we'll keep 50% or whatever it is.
Yeah, that's something to consider.
Make sure you're wealthy enough if you're
going to go to Fire Festival to get yourself out of Fire
Festival.
Make sure you have enough money for a contingency plan
on your own. Yeah. I always feel that way about, have you money for a contingency plan on your own.
Yeah.
I always feel that way about, have you ever been to Burning Man?
Oh my gosh.
I just talked about Burning Man because I'm just fascinated by who would ever want to
go.
I don't know.
How much money does it, is it expensive to go?
I mean, I assume it's, it's pricing enough.
It's pricey because I think it's so much effort in what you have to bring and set up and everything.
And then there's like different levels of where you can have more luxury and people
say, no, you don't understand now.
It's like you can just show up and you can pay for the camp to be set up and there's
caterers and all this other stuff.
I thought they had like a comedy club, like a pop-up comedy club this year too.
I think it's just about like like, being on psychedelic drugs
and stuff. I don't know what the appeal is.
I don't either. It looks like a bunch of really,
really rich people spent a lot of money to go learn how to be a good person.
I know a really, really rich person who went.
Yeah.
And I saw all...
Then when she got back and put away all of her Mad Max outfits and stuff.
It's so big it's like the size of a whole closet. She had to bring all that
stuff. Yeah. For all the outfits. Yeah. And then also they had the nice homes and
they had the luxury whatever but then part of the bartering was that she had
to be like a housekeeper. Oh in order to stay in her luxury home? I don't know.
I just, I don't know.
I love that, I love that someone that rich
spent that much money to be like,
let's see how the other half lives.
I just said, I was like, she and her husband,
I'm like, I go, I just wonder,
is either of them ever gonna turn to the other
and be like, can we not next year?
Like, are you really both 100% on the same page
year after year after year of doing this?
Yeah, I can't.
But I don't know, I know people that have gone
for like 20 years straight.
I think that either you go 20 years straight.
Or you just do it once and then that's it.
Yes, I don't think there's anyone that's like,
I did it for three and I'm good.
Yeah.
No, I think it's a lifetime commitment,
I'm never not gonna go.
Yeah.
And, cause it looked like I did see
kind of a lot of older people there now.
I did too.
That are probably going for 25 years.
Or you went once and you never again.
And that's it.
I could rationalize going to Fire Festival a second time before I could rationalize going
to Burning Man a second time.
Because at least Fire Festival I want to see what happens.
And there's like a beach.
And there's a beach and I want to be a part of history even if it's lopsided.
But like Burning Man is just, it's just insane to me because I feel like everybody who's
gone to Burning Man comes back and they're like, no, you don't understand, it's groundbreaking.
It's really important to be kind to people.
They always go to Burning Man and come back like, did you know it's really important to
be polite to people and consider. I'm like, you had to go to this random festival
and spend a bunch of money to be in a desert stranded
to learn that like you should maybe look out
for other people's interests.
Like that's everybody I know who goes to Burning Man.
Like you could have learned that
with your neighbor, but okay.
But I have no desire, but I was the same way with Bonnaroo.
Like I have a bunch of-
What's Bonnaroo?
Bonnaroo's the one they do in Nashville. That's kind of like I feel like it's like Burning Man light
Okay, not really. It's it's not as you don't barter and it's obvious. There's music though. There's music. There's comedy
It's very hippie like it's maybe not Nashville. Maybe like right outside of Nashville, but even Burning Man alone. I was like
I'm not gonna like it looks like I'm roughing it. Like, and I don't camp, I glamp,
and I don't even glamp, you know what I mean?
Like, I was like, oh, like, my chosen festival
would be like Lollapalooza in Chicago.
Like, that one's, like, nice and has its shit together
and whatever, but Burning Man feels like Bonnaroo on crack.
Because if I feel like the hotel I'm going to
might require me to bring my own hairdryer,
that's about camping as I go.
I literally threw a fit at my hotel in Hollywood two days ago because I was like the lights aren't working
I know I just started packing my own
Mirror yeah, and I'm like why haven't I done this before yeah?
I won't even go to a dive bar like my friends are like come on
Let's just go grab a drink and if it like if I walk in and the lights are too low
And they don't have driver Muth for my martini, and it smells like plumbing friends are like, come on, let's just go grab a drink. And if I walk in and the lights are too low
and they don't have driver muth for my martini
and it smells like plumbing, I'm like, this is abhorrent.
I need to leave immediately.
I need to go to lounges and martini bars.
So I'd be on day two of Burning Man
and I would be like, just let me die.
Just let me, I hate this.
So yeah.
Real quick before we close it up.
This was from People Magazine.
This has gone viral.
This was an obituary that this girl posted.
Oh, whoa.
For her mother, Florence Flo Harrelson, 65,
died on February 22nd without family by her side
due to burnt bridges and a wake of destruction left in her
path. It's gonna be my obituary. Florence did not want an obituary or anyone including family to know she
died. That's because even in death she wanted those. She terrorized to still be
living in fear looking over their shoulders so this isn't so much an
obituary but more of a public service announcement. I love this. I love
this energy.
Sometimes when someone's horrible and you hear they died and you're like, okay.
You know what really annoys me?
Yes, that and what really annoys me is when people, when celebrities, certain celebrities
die and people, I understand having a very strong emotional connection to some celebrities.
Obviously like for me, like when Robin Williams died, very sad.
Kobe Bryant was very sad, whatever.
But it's such a pet peeve when my friends get really upset
when certain celebrities die.
I'm like, you didn't know them.
You don't know if they're shitty.
Don't act like your world is crashing around you.
You didn't just lose your brunch partner.
You know what I mean?
Like, it's OK.
It's the same thing, when did the diddy stuff,
I was like, let his career die.
He's a billionaire pedophile or whatever.
But this reminds me, like, didn't Shannon Doherty,
before she passed, she had a list of people
she didn't want at her funeral?
Yes.
I loved that.
I was like, I don't want people who treated me shitty,
cheated on me, lied to me, were not good friends,
whatever, talked crap about me.
I don't want them showing up
when I'm passing into the afterlife.
I don't want-
So they can like network at my funeral.
Absolutely not.
Yeah, like I'm like, don't compare your respects.
If you couldn't respect me when I was alive,
don't respect me when I'm dead in a casket.
Like, you know what I mean?
Like, so I love this.
And honestly, the energy of her headshot's incredible as well, too.
Yeah.
I honestly thought that was Richard Simmons for two seconds, which is terrible for me
to say, but that's what I thought for two seconds.
Yeah.
I love this.
Girl, tell everybody where they can start following you and enjoy the joy that you are.
Thank you. Britney Brave, at Britney Brave, B-R-I-T-T-A-Y,
Brave on everything, TikTok, Instagram.
I'm on tour.
I'm gonna be doing some stuff at New York Comedy Festival.
Oh, cool.
Yeah, I have a big Miami headline show
coming up to November, and yeah, come see me.
Oh, I have my podcast, too.
I have a podcast, it's called Big Yikes.
It's brand new.
Great.
And it's, I get cool people to come on and admit their big yikes moment. Meaning whenever they messed
up or fell flat on their face or how to say sorry or all that kind of stuff. I love that.
Yay. Thank you for having me. Thank you. You're adorable and you're so so funny and I know
we'll work again soon on stage. You're one of my favorite people to work with. Oh. You're not only-
I did not pay her to say that, you guys.
No, she did not.
Heather, it's so rare as a younger comedian
to get to work with somebody who's not only
phenomenal and hilarious and so successful,
but so kind.
And I feel like it was so easy to work with you.
You were so down to earth, so supportive.
I really love working with you.
Well, that was really nice to say.
We stan Heather.
I really appreciate you saying that.
Love you, girl.
Thanks.
Love you.