Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald - Chris Franjola, AI Wives, Nepo Babies and Bad Movies

Episode Date: October 23, 2025

The hilarious Chris Franjola is here. We discuss the fallout of Kristen Bell’s post. Jen Aniston claims that she turned down being a cast member on SNL. Suzanne Somers' husband has made an AI wife of her. Why do some movies fail so badly? Nepo babies have it harder than you think. How hard was it to coparent with Britney Spears? So funny so juicy enjoy. -For a limited time, get a HUGE discount on the iRESTORE Elite + Illumina Face Mask Bundle with code JUICY at ⁠https://iRestore.com⁠  -Treat yourself to the most comfortable and innovative bras on earth and save 20% Off sitewide at ⁠https://honeylove.com/JUICY⁠  -Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial and start selling today at ⁠https://SHOPIFY.COM/JUICYSCOOP⁠  Subscribe to my new show Juicy Crimes!: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/juicycrimes⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Stand Up Tickets and info: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://heathermcdonald.net⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  Subscribe to Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald and get extra juice on Patreon: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://bit.ly/JuicyScoopPod⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/juicyscoop ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Watch the Juicy Scoop On YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@JuicyScoop⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Shop Juicy Scoop Merch: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://juicyscoopshop.com ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow Me on Social Media: Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/heathermcdonald ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ TikTok: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@heathermcdonald⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠  YouTube: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HeatherMcDonaldOfficial⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey there, it's Heather McDonald from JuicySoup, and I have the juiciest of them all on Audible. Romance has always been a crowd-placing genre on their platform, and there's more to imagine when you listen to their expansive collection. They have audiobooks to satisfy every side of you. I'm talking about the Romantasy genre, which is huge on book talk right now, with authors like Sarah J. Mass and Devney Perry. Get your first great love story for free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial at audible.com We bet you didn't know. Our new train's panoramic

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has got the juices scoop when you're on the road, when you're on the go. Juicy's scoop is the show to know. with tales for real life Mr. Semic serial data and serial sister you'll be addicted and addicts it fast

to the number one tabloid real life podcast. Listen in, listen up whoooooo! Hannah McDonald's Juicy Scoop Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop. I don't even know if they deserve this. I don't know that the juicy scoopers,

the juicy crime people, I don't know if they deserve the joy that is coming to you right now. It is your face. favorite, the one the only, Chris Franchola. Thank you. Hilarious wearing a fall look. Fall, yeah.

All delight, as you would say. Yes. Not that anyone would ever not finish this episode, but at the end, we will be featuring Chris's Halloween costume. My Halloween costume that would be wearing this Halloween as part of a family costume. We've become those people now where we all dress as a family. You'll see what it's going to be. Well, you asked what I have going on.

in my life. Well, this Friday, as in tomorrow, because airs Thursday, there is, in my new community, there is at our country club a freaky Friday night. And at first I wasn't going to go. I was actually going to do like a girls weekend in Lakeita, but then people kept saying, you've got to go. I go, isn't it kind of kidlike? Like, isn't there little kids? They're like, it is, but you have to see it. they're like families dress up like each like i mean sure they like the movie like you switch bodies no no it's just a Halloween theme but they're like there's a maze and there's a this and it's a that and they're like the parents drink and like if you have a really little kid you can't drink that much but all the other people that have older kids like well i don't really have any kid coming but then

my other girlfriend was like i don't know she's like i've got nothing to do friday i'm like i just think we should need to go and see it all right i'm like okay so i have my You know, I'm still debating on the costumes. Oh. I still, I still, I have a costume that came in. Are you going all out or are you going to half ass it? So then next Friday, the real Halloween, our community goes off to. And there's like, and there's a real party to go to.

On Halloween night. Yes. And the rumors that I've heard is that there are like, there's bars for the adults for the trick or shooting. Everyone is under golf cards. Okay. There is in-and-out burger trucks for treats. Man.

So anyway, Drake had a great idea. Okay. We, as you said, last time you were at our house, today we're in the studio in Burbank. Because we do both, and I don't know what I'm doing with the future, okay? Whatever. But Peter took out a project. At the house? Yes.

That probably is, you probably underestimated. Is it over and head? What did you call this again? The Schlegels. The Schlegel's, just a little bit of back story. They're a person in my neighborhood I grew up in where every neighborhood has one. You know, it's just no matter how nice the neighborhood, there's one house that's a little bit, you know, shlegly. It's the only way.

And that was the neighbor. They have like a workout bench on the front lawn. You know, they have indoor furniture. Furniture that's meant for the indoors. They have it outside. You know, like, why not? It's a couch. A couch that actually on the end has like the lounge chair.

Yeah. And it could work on the patio as well. With the drinks that are stuck in them. Yes, yes, yes. So that's a Schlegel. And I was, I think I said you guys don't become the Schlegel of your new neighborhood. Speaking of those couches, I just happen to watch Sister Wise that I have it in a long time. And Cody's down to his last wife and they're moving.

And they're trying to like move the, all the show's been on for 25 seasons and 17 seasons feature them moving. They've moved so many times, okay? head as they're moving Cody's like getting out that like saran wrap stuff for like the couch pieces and it's all those couches that each one it has a plug. Yeah.

And like a massage chair. And it reclines and it has the drinks in it and they're brown. That's a trashy look. It's horrible. And I'm like oh I know if I like research people's comments they definitely were talking. And he's wrapping it. I'm like I don't think you need to wrap it. Yeah. I think it's going to be fine

just throwing it in the truck. I've never been that thirsty that I need my drink that, like, next to me at all times. In the thing. Yeah, in the thing. Like, I don't need a cuff holder in my couch. I think I'm good. Anyway, so, yeah, so then, yeah, so that's why I've definitely going. So what did Peter take on?

What is the... It is a thing in our backyard, just frixie steps going down where you can go down to the golf course. It's wood, I don't know, but there's a dirt. And so Drake goes, and it's taking... a long time with the men that we got. Okay. And so Drake said, I have a great idea for Halloween this year, Mom. I go what?

He goes, when the kids come, we're just going to give a Home Depot bucket. And if they take the dirt that's on our driveway and bring it down to the area in the backyard and dump it, then they'll get a free candy bar. Oh, so you have to put them to work. And he goes, and it'll be spooky. It'll look like a scary maze. You could, like, fall and roll down the hell on. Not a bad idea.

Not if we try to make the best of everything. So that'll be fun. So what is your costume going to be? You know, I don't know if I want to announce it just yet. Because I got, it came in. It's one that I've worn before, but it's a cheaper version of it. Someone's going to figure it out. And I was like, I don't know.

I don't know if I can pull this off. Okay. You know, like I thought it might be my last slut year, but I've said that like every year. Oh, is it sloth? slut again? It's a little bit slut. And then I then I was like, then when I went to Brandy and Julie's show in San Francisco, which is like

this horror dance show, Nightmare and Strip Street. A what? The horror dance show? Horror, like horror movie. And then the dancers like do the I think they said horrors were dancing. No, horror. Which would also be fun. They were kind of horrors. But they were great dancers, great bodies. Anyway, I was like, ooh, do I want to do Megan? The Megan costume.

Oh, Megan the doll. Yeah, like that dog. Or maybe I should do Megan Markle. They just have a Gap shirt with the collar off. Maybe I just should. I kind of want to do something. I'm hoping that something would come to me like funny, like last minute. Yeah.

That I could pull together. Because they do have wigs and things that aren't like, you know, something like trashy lingerie-ish. Like I just want something kind of like, oh, that's clever. Like, I don't know. So, yeah, it kind of, we were both like Drake was with me and we were both like, I don't know. Now I feel like I want to do something scary. Oh. Which I've never really done.

Okay. That's a good one. Megan. I'll just go with no makeup on. That'll do it. Yeah. That's fun. Yes.

So it'll be exciting. We're doing all of that. All right. Let's get into some topics. Oh, but I was saying San Francisco, because I said, how was Vegas? I was in Las Vegas. You were in Las Vegas. And I'm like, you hear these things.

It's dead. Nobody's around. It's a ghost town. Right. And what was your perception? My take away from Las Vegas was it seemed like it seemed like it was still going. Like, I mean, I'm, you know, I'm an old man now, but they, you could still have a good time in Las Vegas if you wanted to. I mean, I watched these kids going into the club and the MGM.

Lined up. I mean, oh, my God, line. But everyone's just, you know, 18 years old, it looks like. I'm happy to say, you speaking of slutty outfits, they're back. Everybody was wearing, yeah, like a lot of, uh, the giant pants seem to be gone. Oh my God, thank God. I have been praying that the giant pants. And the big white sneakers seem to be gone.

I mean, this is in Vegas, so it's a little different. Well, if you're going to a nightclub. Yeah. So they were still, they were all out. We got to, we got the, we got to get the kids back into going out and getting drunk. However, I noticed a new thing in going out. What's that? Because we went, you know, we were out in San Francisco.

And then last night we went to a really good restaurant for McKinsey's birthday in Sherman Oaks. And have you noticed if you order a drink like a martini or something? It is in the fucking tiniest glass I have ever seen. Really? They are like, it's like a joke. This has now happened the last few times I've gone to a restaurant and ordered like a Cosmo. In the past, a Cosmo was like this, okay?

Nice size martini glass. Sometimes if you're out a good place, they'll even give you the leftover side car. Yeah. Okay? Now the drink is literally like, like, it's so small. Wow. Now they do fill it up to the rim, so then you're like, like, because you know like each sip is worth like $1.50. So you're like, like, I don't want any to slip.

I mean, it's the glassware. I haven't noticed. I mean, I don't go out much, but yeah. I don't know. But anyway. I'll keep an eye on it. Good times, good food. Okay.

So, but yes, San Francisco, where we were financial district walking around down to the water, pretty clean. I agree, too. I was just there and I went on Instagram and said it. I'm like, I don't know. I've heard horror stories, but it seems pretty nice. Now, listen, like every big city, I'm sure there's corners. Yeah, there's a scary part. But at least I'm just saying,

you know, you watch these things and it's like no, so I'm excited. Of course, I will be in Las Vegas November 14th and going to have so much fun. It's going to be Brabaccon weekend that Friday night. Get your tickets at Heather There's a lot of billboards for it. I was in

where you're going to be, the MGM. And there's just billboards everywhere. That's why I'm coming in Thursday, because sometimes you know when you go to a show and you get to the city and they've already removed your billboard because the next day there's somebody else? So I want to get there at least one day before my show

just so I can walk. I always just said, if I had a billboard for a month, I'd just go have Chinese chicken salad next to it every day. I just need to soak in all the moments because I'm always like, this can booed my last. This could be my last. There's nothing sad than leaving a comedy club and they're taking your name down. Like they have the guy out there.

It's like midnight and he's already pulling your name down and putting up Bruce Bruce or somebody. I'm saying I've gone and my name's already been gone because they're like, oh, the show's sold out or it's 8 o'clock. We don't need to promote you anymore. We want to promote Joe Schmo in two days. And I'm like, well, I would have liked to have taken a photo in front of my thing like Luann de Liceps does. I went one time and my name was Frank Franjola on the marquee. So I said, well, my name is, I'm not Frank, Franjol. And I said, oh, we're sorry.

I said, I'm Chris. So then I went back out and they changed Frank to Chis, C-H-I-S. And I was like, I said, Chris, he goes, you didn't say chis? I'm like, did you really think my name was Chis? Like, I didn't even heard that name. Anyway, they finally got it worked out. As a stand-up comic, like, there are so many times. I literally get to the place.

I'm like, way to make me feel, any way to make me feel less special. Yeah. Less special, less important, less everything. Yeah. It's bad enough you just got to mention the name of the places, you know. Like it's funny bone and all the chuckles. And then your name's misspelled. You can't just the humbling.

It just never ends. Yes, I've definitely had Heather McDonnell many times. Yes. Okay. Kristen Bell, this came out. We talked about it a couple days ago. She tried to be funny. Right.

And did a post. about her husband being married for 12 years and, you know, to the man that said he wanted to always kill me, but he didn't, whatever, some dumb joke like that. And everyone's like, really went after her on social media. So I thought it was interesting that she like didn't remove it. She didn't remove it. Then she, but she did, uh, do the comments, uh, limit the comments. And then today, according to us weekly, is the reason they believe that she skipped down on the Today Show. She was supposed to be on the Today Show, promoting her new, you know, her TV show, which nobody wants us. Yeah. And she just didn't come. And it's like, I just want to tell

people, this stuff goes by so quickly. Oh, I mean, it's like, just take down the, just take down the post. Right. And nobody remembers. And if they want to, and then if they go on the Today show, go, yeah, sometimes things don't land right. Yeah. I'm really sorry. Just trying to be funny. Right.

Wasn't funny. End of story. That's it. Maybe we'll find out, no, her kid was sick and blah, blah, blah, blah. They'll give out some other excuse. But this, to me,

is just like prolonging a joke that just flopped. Yeah. The funny thing I found out about it or there were, there was like, she did like four jokes in a row that had like a domestic violence spin to them.

And I thought there was several times where you could have stopped and went like, I don't know, this one line I got. But I don't know. One line I got, but there was four lines of like, and, you know, some people kill their wives. And I was like, I don't know. I feel like it was a little too much. You know, it really is. And it really, you know, we all can make fun of like, the way I kind of make fun of Dateline is more making it about me. that like if I went missing it would be nice for someone to finally like get my videos all together and put it together like I'd like to live like if I just went missing and then they were put it all together

in a beautiful montage of when I was young and like did the reel that I've been wanting to do that I'm too lazy to do like not so it like it would be good if you got murdered just to get a good editor on it just to get like a real good producer and editor on it that like isn't going to be annoyed

Yeah, no, but so it's like, we've all made jokes about it. But, yeah, sometimes it just, you have to think about why can this kind of edgy thing be funny? And it's not going to make you think about a husband actually killing his wife when so many have. So like, yeah, but I feel, yeah, sometimes don't land. Like, that's life. But also, I think everybody these days loves a pile on. Yes. You know?

So once they start seeing blood in the wall. that I'm guilty of it myself. You know, I don't care about Kristen Bell and Jack Sheppard, but now I'm like, oh, how dare they? What do I care? But yeah, so I feel like now you start reading about it. Now everybody's involved, you know? There definitely has come a time in the last few years

where, like, I would say something that then someone would write or I'd see that they picked apart something I said on here that could be interpreted as insensitive or incorrect or wrong. And then you do just get to a point where I'm, I'm just like, whatever. I know. Like, I mean, I'm sorry. Like, this is, again, I said over together.

This is comedic conversation podcast. This is, no, I don't have it. Do your research. No, I know, I don't. I read the articles. That's the beauty of podcasts. I can. The beauty of podcast.

I don't remember people's names. This is not, you're not watching a news report. This is not ABC tonight. Like, just whatever. If I get it wrong, that's fine. Put in the comments. You were wrong. You said it was Bella Hadid when it was Gigi Hadid.

you're right I was wrong sometimes I listen back to it I'm like oh Heather you said Vanessa Williams instead of Venus Williams because I'm fucking going off the top of my head I do four shows a week leave me the fuck like but it's okay but do correct me and then I'm like oh thanks that's fine

I never felt the need to correct anybody online I don't think I don't think I've ever gone excuse me it was Bella Hadid Gigi I don't know I'd like to think that I have more going on I'm too busy I don't even care. Yeah, but it's good to finally just get to a place where I used to be like, oh my God, let me do a correction.

And then I was like, no, corrections are lame because the correction four days later, like we've already moved on. So just, you know, get over yourselves. Yeah. You guys, I am loving the I Restore Illumina face mask. This is the best item I have ever used as far as convenience and actually seeing a huge difference. I know you've heard about red light therapy and different lasers that you can use that can really help give your skin a glow and build collagen. And that is what I love about the I Restore Illumina face mask. It is dermatologist recommended that packs double the power of most other masks

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It's Trixine Katte. You're from the Bald and the Beautiful and we have to talk to you about audible. If you know anything about us, we are certified romancipaths. Rose sniffing swoon lords. Soft-spoken sirens of sentiment. Devotees of drama-drenched desire. As you can tell, we've been listening to Audubles' romance collection and have been transported to fantastical realms of delicious dalliances and breathless ballads of burning petroval.

To put it quite bluntly, we are obsessed. Sometimes there are times when you need to escape, to be whisked away by tales of fantastical bonds, mutual pining, and forbidden love. There are no limits to your imagination when you listen to Audible's romance collection. Audible has audiobooks that will satisfy every side of you, whether that be Elizabethan formal,

or nefariously naughty. Whatever kind of romance you're into, Audible has you covered, Deborah. They have everything from modern rom-coms by authors like Lily Chew and Ali Hazelwood to the latest Romanticie series from Sarah J. Mass and Devney Perry. Plus, they even have the regency favorites

like Pride and Prejudice and all the really steamy stuff with lords longing and lace. Imagine a dalliance with a duke or a jet-setting jaunt with a sexy billionaire or even a trist with a dragon-slaying swordsman from a far-off realm. Because, girl, you've earned it.

You can find a book-based boyfriend in the city, a hunk on a polo field, or a tall, dark, and handsome duke at a countryside manner. Audible's romance collection is an invitation to have it all because there is nothing guilty about this pleasure. You can get your first great love story for free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial at audible.com. But here is a correction. This is this young mom, we talked about it the other day. She was pregnant with a boyfriend. She didn't want him in the delivery room. She picked a fight with him.

Then she did bring the baby around. And, you know, she said it was born early. She was born early. So she's smaller and she's, you know, getting a little NICU situation. Some people are like, oh, my God, how is she? And then they went to the, anyway, it was a fake pregnancy and it was a fake baby doll. The whole thing was fake. The whole thing was fake.

And did the boyfriend know was fake the whole time? No, she even told them that the baby died. Oh, no. So that he was mourning, a fake pregnancy. Wow. And a fake baby doll. It was a baby doll. And she has come out and admitted, yes, that she bought one of those expensive dolls and that she was sorry, you know.

Okay. But I mean, yeah. Matt, you're trying to get like DNA testing on a doll. And they're like, it's rubber. You're like, can you just take this tooth, this Q-tip and just make sure that this baby that hasn't moved anytime? And then like, and they said, oh, it was cold or something. He's like, oh, she's so cold. And she's like, she has a cold.

I'm like, usually when you have a cold. We found a target price tag on your child's foot, and we're concerned. Oh, man. Oh, my God. So that was a little update. Okay, Jen Aniston went on Dak Shepard's show before his wife was, who, f, whu, type it away, something hilarious. I know.

That's the other thing. Like, they seem like a couple that you just, just, everybody, take them down. It's Blake Glylevely. Right. Ryan Reynolds that really want to be stand-ups and really think they're funny and they love funny people but they're just not that funny. I guess I won't be asked to be on Dexter show any time soon.

Here's what it becomes, I believe. You're surrounded by yes people. You know what I mean? You're Kristen Bell. And the assistant goes, that's so funny. Oh my God, you always kill me. You guys are the cutest people. Right.

But we're not a perfect couple. That's what we're saying. Like, we've started just like, like, yeah. We've all been yes people at one time or another in our lives, you know, we've had to do it a lot. And, you know, it's one of those things. We're just like, and then so they're like, oh, okay, I'll put it on there. My friends thought it was funny. But they paid to tell you that.

Speaking of which, there were times that I wasn't the yes person. And I'd be like, and then I realized, yeah, maybe that isn't great. Yeah. You think that the person wants the truth. I think you can go, well, you know, I don't know that David Letterman would be doing that. I don't know why you'd be doing it, whatever. And then it'd be like, so yeah, sometimes you just don't. But speaking of Jennifer Aniston.

Okay. So she was on the show. And of course, she's, you know, promoting the morning show and she's great. And she said, I was offered S&L. Yeah, Lauren offered it to me before Friends. And it just felt like, oh, I don't know. I can't really remember with this brain of mine, but it was like, I don't know if I like the way the women are treated on that show. So I turned it down.

Okay. And I was like, okay, at that time, okay, now I'm not saying. So what era is this? Is she saying before Friends? So Friends began in like 1996. Is this Molly Shannon? So this would have been like 94, 95, I'm guessing. So all the women on there at that time.

The women were. Anna Gastier, maybe Molly Shannon. Onagos. Sherry-O-Terry. Yeah, Sherry-Ther. So a lot of, like, I was at Growlings at that time. Yeah. And a lot of Groundlings people were getting chosen.

And the way they chose people back then were definitely Second City, stand-ups, and the groundings. And a lot of characters. You had to have characters and impressions. Right. So I was supposed to audition for it. And I had my whole thing set up. And then my MTV thing got picked up and they wouldn't see me.

Right. But it was like three original characters and at least three celebrity impressions that you, you know, so you'd write it, do it. And usually you'd be your best stuff that you'd done on stage and whatever. And there'd be times where Lauren Michaels would come and sit in the audience and they could only feature 17 bits. And it was like warfare. It was like whoever was sleeping with the director at the time would get more bits on because Lauren was in there. And then the one person that's like, no, it was my agent that invited. Lauren, and now I only have two bits

to show them. I mean, so when people like the actual audition process. The audition, no, this was just to he'd come to a show. Oh, like an actual live take. Oh, you mean a groundling show? And if I'm, if it wasn't Lauren, it was like the top casting person. To see who are these

like hot up and comers in the group. And like I'm, yeah, and like Anna was seen there and like Sherry was seen and Will Ferrell like they were all seen there. And so I'm just kind of like, I just, now it doesn't mean that it didn't happen because she's cute and she is truly a very good

communique actress. But I just was like, wow, that's really, that's not, and even when they weren't doing that, it was like Janine Garofalo, like they were picking like names. If they weren't, they were named, either names, stand-ups or they were like, yeah. So anyway, I thought that was interesting and that her reason was just that she didn't think that it was like a good place for like women to be that it was a misogynistic place. which it probably was.

But yeah, so then that was the one thing she said. And then I also thought, the next thing I just saw a clip of is she, you know, they talked about her having kids. Yeah. And then it never happened. I remember there was, she even made jokes about being pregnant with triplets and all this other stuff because every week would, because that would sell the magazines when they were selling magazines.

And so this story just, I just remembered this story. Okay. So Chelsea has become really good friends with Jen at this. time, which is quite the coup. I remember the year. Yes, quite the coup. And I think she was around either doing the show or she was going to make an

appearance on After lately. So she was kind of around, and very nice to all of us, by the way. She was very sweet. Yes. And I went to like some red carpet thing at the four seasons were pre-

Oscars, whatever. Okay. And I do the red carpet. But then, like, someone that I didn't, not on the red carpet, but somebody that, like, worked for like some okay or whatever. Right. Is like, oh, do you think Jenna Aniston is pregnant, you know? Because at the time she was with Justin Thoreau and still of an age you could be pregnant, you know. And I was like, no, I'm like, no. I'm like, no, sometimes I think for, maybe she was just like a little bloated or what.

Like, I think she might have, I think I said something like, I don't know that she is or not, but I will say, like, yeah, it looked like she could have like a little pooch or something like that. Okay. But I would not say it on the red carpet. And then I get this email sent to me, like, the next day or something that Chelsea sent to me that was, that Jen Aniston allegedly had sent to Chelsea. Okay. Oh, that must have been a joke. I totally think it was a joke. But at the time, I felt so badly.

Yeah. And it was like, hey, Chels, like, don't really appreciate, you know, your staff people talking about my pregnancies when I'm not pregnant. Right. And, like, this is really uncool. And, like, something like that. And I know now it was probably Chelsea and Tom. Yeah, that's definitely. That's got Tom written all over it.

Because it did get written somewhere. The girl I was talking to was, like, some cheesy reporter, like, life and style or whatever. And I didn't realize that. And they're like, you got to really watch what you say when you go to these things. And I'm sure they were walking around, like, oh, Heather thinks she's all that because she got invited to one, like, gift bagging suite, you know? And I was like, oh, my God. I'm like, how can I apologize to her? Like, is there any way?

Like, I, oh, my God, you're right. Like, this is totally inappropriate that I said this. Yeah. And, but now, of course, not now, but even like 10 years ago, I realized, oh, that was. probably all, like, fucking with me just to be awful and give me anxiety. I think so. Yeah. Yeah, it sounds like one of those.

But anyway, she did say, she goes, finally it comes to a place where, you know, you realize, like, it's not going to happen when you're going to be a mom. Yeah. And then Dax is like, yeah, I can imagine there's sadness, but then there's probably, like, acceptance and then even some relief. And I'm like, yeah, I think a lot of childless people today are walking around with money in their pockets. Mm-hmm.

and peaceful horizons. Yeah. Well, as a guy who had a child late in life, congratulations to all of you who was childless. You didn't have to walk around Target yesterday because to find orange clothes because today's like at school. Oh, yeah?

Today was like no bullying day or something. No bullying? What is bullying day? Listen, that's what I told my daughter. My daughter was like, so today is no bullying day? See, yeah, tomorrow I can go back to bullying. But today, Wear you're orange and don't.

So I had to go find orange yesterday, but not Halloween orange, just orange, which is hard to find. So I found a pair of shorts in the sales rack over Target that were from the summer. Okay. And they were like nine sizes too big. But they were orange and she wore them. She looked like a complete psychopath. And anyway, so she walked around in her giant orange shorts today over at school. Wow.

That's what I have to do. Yeah. I did all of the things. I know you did. Yeah. And it doesn't, it doesn't, it does get better because last night it was McKinsey's birthday. Oh, okay.

And she's a lovely boyfriend. I met the guy. He's a nice guy. Great. And then we met the parents. We had a lovely dinner all together. Oh, no. How did that go?

Fabulous. Oh, they were nice people. Oh, yes. Sometimes, yeah. No, no, I knew they'd be great because he's great. Like, no, it's great. Yeah. I mean, it really is.

People know the story of what it was like my life earlier. Go to Patreon. This is some sweet, sweet cherry on the top of like, oh, my God, don't ever give up. Don't ever give up. Don't ever give up because it's better. It can get better. Good. I mean, I love it.

It's better. It's going to be like this. Yeah. It's going to be like this. Right. And there's going to be times where I'm just like calling my sister and I'm like, I want this job to end. When will it end? Which job?

Chelsea Lately? Mom. Oh, mom. I wanted to have that too. Chad Allison, just email me. She's mad at me. I remember when she first walked into After Lately. Yeah.

We used to do like a weird thing after Lately. It made no sense really. But if somebody said yes to being on the show, and we got some big people to say yes to being on the show. But we didn't really write them like a quality part. Some of them we just had for a couple of hours. Right. So we couldn't really write them like a,

So they would just, like, walk into the writer's room, which made no sense. I'm like, oh, hi, oh, hi. Yeah, and my role was always to be, like, completely starfucker. Like, on the poster, it says star fucker, like, fame chaser or something. Like, we had our faces on this poster. That was like some half-ass e-promotional thing where they didn't even try. Yeah, and it was like, here's the cast of after lately. Just for people are like, what are they talking about?

We had three seasons of this show that was basically, like, your enthusiasm or meets the office. Like a Larry Sanders kind of, yeah, yeah. Like, yeah, type of show about making of the show. And really, it is funny. It is. It is funny. I don't know where to find it, but it is funny and I would love to like rewatch it. It's got some good episodes.

And, um, but anyway, so yeah, it was always just like, you know, whatever. Yeah. I just remember Janet Francis just walking in and going, oh, hi. And we were like, oh, hi. And then it was like a weird, there's no reason why anybody would walk into And it's just, oh, are we going to aerobics or something? And they just walked out.

Yeah, yeah. It was just a show that I'm friends with Jennifer Anish. And then I remember one time Chelsea's like, all right, you know what? I'm done asking my fucking friends to be on this show. Yeah. You guys need to find famous people too. And I'm like, well, I only know the Kardashians and they've already made their appearances. So like, I don't know how else I'm supposed to get famous people.

Because E was like, we're only doing this show if you're like famous guest stars. I know. Because we're not even watching it ourselves. I have a friend who's an electrician. Can he be on it? I don't know anybody famous. Oh, my God. That's fine.

Oh, my God. Anyway, speaking of famous, this is interesting. So the late beautiful Suzanne Summers, she and her husband were married forever and built a dynasty. Of course, she was on Three's company and did all these other things. And she sadly died of cancer a couple years ago.

Well, he has gotten into a new venture. He's 89. and he said, there is an AI, Suzanne Summers, like doll, life-size doll. A clone. A cloned. And he goes, I can't tell the difference. But the girl doesn't look like her at all. Could have better daughter.

Is that the clone? That's the cloned. This picture looks like a rubber doll. Yeah, it looks like rubber doll. I mean, I've seen these rubber sex dolls before. But of course, as AI, they, by giving this, the AI person, all of her books, all of interviews. You could ask it anything and they can answer

as Suzanne, which they could do now with all of us, especially with podcasting and everything else. And so, yeah. But wait a minute. No, I mean, not to get too graphic, but does he fuck it? Like, what is it for? To sit in his kitchen and have breakfast with him or? I don't know if he's thinking

other people might want to have a Suzanne at Summers in their house. I don't know how he's like making this profitable. Yeah. But it's It's, you know. Oh, is he trying to make a profitable? I thought it's just because he was lonely. He said it's like a venture.

I think it's maybe that maybe the venture is that you could do this with any lost one. Oh. Oh, I get it. You could like, you know, whatever. You could recreate them. Yeah. And you could just go, hey, good morning. What did you think of?

And like, okay, so let's say it's me, you know. Oh, like a Heather doll. A Heather doll. And I'm gone. And then like Peter or something walks in it is like, what did you think of the last episode of Real House of O.C.? And then it would know what was on OC last night And they would know who I like What I think is lame

And then it would just come out and be like I can't believe that they did that Yeah like yeah And it would like say you know But maybe it means like slightly more specific Like to what would irritate me or whatever I'd be like a fake storyline Alcoholic bitch

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Absolutely incredible air transat. Fly the seven-time world's best leisure airline champions, Air Transat. But I'm going to bring it up again. I mean, there's only one reason why you would have one of these. It's not to talk about real housewives. It's to fuck it. That's the bottom line. Or do something sexual with it, right?

I mean, look at it. He didn't make that to talk, you know, three's company with. I don't know. Drake and Peter are always talking about AI. me and I'm like no like no I'm not like murdering you and then AIing you or just like they're like if you become

incapacitated like we could you could still be doing juicy scoop oh yeah I think the voice voice is easy to think that and I'm like well that doesn't really make me feel good but like I don't have to do anything so anyway really this is what I think is going to happen

okay in the future prediction all right because now there's so much AI news, TikTok reels and stuff where you're like, wait, is this real? Was this real? I mean, I could spot I feel like I could spot the AIs. Right. Because there's this new thing

that we make these clips. Sierra. Sierra. Sierra. Sor. Yeah. Sor. But they look so fake. Right, but just like the self-driving cars, it gets better and better. Of course, yeah. You know? And it's like, people are like, oh, I'll never do a self-drift, like the waymos

were all in different stuff. I'll never do a self-driving car. I'm like, but just know there was a time when people were like, I'll keep my horse and buggy. I'm not getting in that tin can down, you know, like eventually we'll just be like, oh yeah, remember when people used to like drive themselves, whatever? But I think what will happen in this is that I think there might be a movement in the next five years actually like away from like the TikToks and the Instagram, all that stuff, because people will be like, well, it's not real anyway.

So I'm just going to look, I'm just going to like, I don't care what's going on. I'm going to be more about my own community and what's going on here. They say it's already happening. Yeah, I've heard that. I've heard the people are giving up on the dating apps, like the swiping. They want one-on-one connection now. Everyone's done with the left and right or the bumbles and all those different. Well, I think what's really fun is I follow this guy who's tall, and he has tall meetups all over the country.

Okay. And he's cute, and he's like, the next tall meetup is whatever in Austin. And now some shorties try to get in there, those little bitches. What is the height cut off? There is no height cut off. It's just like casual. It's like, hey, there's a tall meetup. And then he does videos and like, yeah, I mean, some of the guys are like, you know, seven feet tall.

And a lot of the girls are like 6263. And it's just like a bar and they meet and they talk and whatever. And so it's like a dating thing for people. But I think there's going to be more stuff like that. I would like that. Because it'll get the people out to. be social in a way that's like of an interest like I think that's what's going to happen more I hope so I'm all for it I need I need to get out more I'm going to go to that tall meeting okay um speaking of

the golden bachelor so I had my friend Maya on a couple weeks ago last week or so and she did not have a connection so she was gone the first night yeah she was gone the first night so I've been kind of watching it and I read an article that it is not doing well ratings wise honestly i tried to i didn't even know it was on and i'm usually pretty up on these things all i can think about is watching it this this gray-haired guy these women crying over him about how much they like they're in love and they're so excited to bring him home and they want this love and they know if it's not him that there will be love for them after i am like i need to jump on peter and appreciate him more really yeah i'm like i literally said to me

Peter, you could totally, like, if I die or become an AI robot, like, 100% you would, like, kill it as a bachelor. Like, I don't even think, this guy has nothing. Like, he's not particularly charming. He's a former football player, so he's pretty cute when he's sitting, but when he walks, he comes off quite elderly.

Yeah. But he has a good body. But there's, like, nothing funny about him or whatever. Right. It's just kind of like... How old is he? Is he 75? He's 66. Oh, okay. And I mentioned this in my last episode, but no one's watching, no one cares.

But his wife, who they got divorced five years ago, she's already married to a woman. Oh, whoa. And I don't know why they don't share that. Because to me, that would even make him more, like, likable to the women. Because when someone's, like, divorced after 25 years, you're like, either someone was awful to you or you were awful to them. Like, it's rare that, like, two people are like, you know what, I love you a lot, but let's find other people we love more. like it's so either they're going to be a little fucked up that to me would have been like oh well that's like hey you can't compete with that you know like how great like yeah your wife is your wife is now happy and whatever but anyway um yeah so it's but people didn't like that he did a podcast and said i don't want anyone under over 60 i don't want anyone over 60 and my friend was under 60 and so everyone was predicting that she'd be the winner but i you know no Are there women on there over 60?

They're all over 60. Oh. My friend was the only one that wasn't. Okay. And they're all, like, attractive and fit and all that. There's no, like, they're very, everyone's super, and he's super attractive, but it's just like, anyway, just kind of interesting. And then in the Bachelor world, this girl, Deanna Pappas, she married her dude. I don't know if he was her bachelor, but he was from the Bachelor world, whether they met afterwards or whatever.

Sure. They're getting divorced. They have a couple kids. Oh. And he no longer has to pay child support because he works for Uber and he doesn't make enough. Oh, so how is she going to get by? The point is, people, when you find the love of your life on a dating game, whether it's The Bachelor or The Reality Show. Or the love is blind or the island ones.

The job is them being on TV. Yeah. Like they're not going back to. They sought that out. Yeah, they went. There's a casting process. It is not a lasting job. Like, all those Bachelor podcasts dried up.

I think there's only, like, maybe three or four left that, like, actually. But they were giving, and they're not really on the dancing with the stars like they used to. Like, it's just, yeah, that is not. I've heard other interviews where people are like, yeah, like, if they did have a regular business, it didn't help it. They're not getting the Instagram numbers. I thought they would get from it. Like, so just know that if you're going to marry them, like... It's not going to work.

I mean, I'm sorry they had two kids, though. I mean, I'm just saying it's not like you married like a medical doctor that could like go get his license reinstated and make $300,000 a year. Uh-huh. He might just be driving Uber, which nothing wrong with driving Uber, but... Well, as a guy who, uh, I know you were on, was it Studs? Yes. I just reposted it. Oh, I put it on Patreon.

You found the episode? You found the episode? I'm going to put it on Instagram and TikTok this weekend, yeah. The entire episode? You found the entire episode? Yeah, I found the entire episode. I was so weird in it. I was on the dating game.

Talk about weird. So way back. Did you find it? Do you know where it is? I think I could probably find it. You can send it in the legacy box and they'll do it for you. Yeah. I won.

I won. Did you go out with the girl? I went out with another girl. The girl who, no, because she was like flew back to wherever she was from and they don't pay for you to come back. All the flights are like from L.A. Yeah, and then we know from the serial killer, the dating serial killer,

that they were just casting actors. Yeah. Anybody, it was like, this is your one gig. That's kind of how I got it. And the two guys on with me, one guy was flamingly gay. Yeah. And he said that, like, to me backstage,

like, I'm just doing it for my, you know, whatever, to be on TV. Yeah. And so that's kind of why I won. I had one guy was morbidly obese, the other guy who was gay. No, she didn't know the morbidly obese.

No, but yeah, I think it was in his voice. You know, anyway, so I won and the best part of it. I was just thinking, Love is Blind just stole the dating game. Yeah, I made it longer. I know. The dating game was, I mean, they need to bring it back.

It's, if Love is Blind's gonna be out there? For those I don't know, the dating game was one girl sat. She had a host. It was, you know, set questions. And then behind a wall with three guys, and then she chose the one that she liked the answers the best. Yeah. Yeah.

And then I came around the corner, and she was like, oh, and then I went to Guadalajara Mexico. That was my trip. You went on it? I went, but with another girl who I never even met. She met me at the airport. But they paid, wait, they paid for it? Yeah, they paid for it.

See, we never collected the trip to Baja Mexico or whatever it was, Cabo. We went on one date after, Ronnie Sugar and I, don't know where you are. What's his name, Ronnie Sugar? His name was Ronnie Sugar. It was 27. like a pretty good house. Oh, my God. In the hills of, like, Studio City.

Yeah. And I think he lived with his brother. And they were like, I mean, they said they were like, you know, real estate investors. I don't know what they're doing. But, like, he was suave. I called him Rico Suave. And, but I was not a comedian at the time. I was entering my senior year of college.

So I was 21. And they said, well, what do you do? Whatever. And I'm like, well, I'm going to be a senior at USC. And they're like, well, we're. We're not going to say USC. We're just going to say you're a college student. And I go, no.

Well, then say I'm a realtor because I was a realtor. I had my real estate license. So they made me, they said she's a 21-year-old real estate agent. So I wear this little orange suit that was like a little skirt and jacket, like a very kind of Allie McBealish. Anyway. And but when I watched it recently, it was so weird because like I'm not good on TV. Yeah. And I have this like weird voice.

I don't know. strange. It was really strange. But it was a long time. It was a long time ago and I was like, and they, you know, they were writing me mean things to say, like about the guy didn't choose. So I was very uncomfortable when he would think that my answer was something nice. And I was like, no, I said you had a face, only a mother could love. And the reason they came up with that one is because I was talking to the producer after, because we'd go on the dates, the cameras wouldn't follow you on the date. Right. And then they would like interview after

and then the guys didn't know who said what. And I said, I said, well, my mother found him very cute and attractive because he came to the house to pick me up. And that's when they came up with that line. You had a face only a mother could love. Like, mean. Well, that was the kind of mistake. And so, anyway, I did win.

The other girl, this other girl who was a nurse, absolutely effed Ronnie Sugar, in my opinion. Really? Yes. And then he didn't choose her. Oh, man. Here are the Virgin wins, you know? And I was like, I kind of felt bad.

because I'm like, she put out. Like, I didn't even kiss this guy. And so, anyway, we went on one date and, like, whatever. I didn't talk to him after that. I said once at Sports Club L.A., and I was like, remember me from Studs? I mean, we were both like, whatever, didn't want to really fun. I'd love to know what became of Ronnie Sugar. Ronnie Sugar.

That's his real name? Yes. I mean, he came. Yes, yes. Okay. That's what he said it was. Yeah. And maybe Sugar isn't as like.

No, I really do think it was. Anyway, so it's, yes, that's my story. But, yeah, you got to be careful. I had, I had sneakers on. But we never went to the Cabo trip, is what I'm saying. Yeah, I went. Yeah, I went. And I never saw the girl, like, she met, saw me at the airport.

Did you sleep together? No. I never even saw her in Guadalajara. She had a boyfriend with her. She's like, oh, he's coming with me. I'm like, all right, I just walked around Guadalajara Mexico. Was it fun at all? I mean, no, mildly.

But, I mean, Guadalajara. I know. It's not even on the water. It's like mid, it's in, you know, landlocked. Yeah. And how many nights were you there, like two? Like three nights. Oh, God.

Yeah. Anyway. It was wild. But I remember I had sneakers on. I was wearing sneakers. And they were like, I don't know. I didn't know. I had nothing.

You know, I just got into L.A. had no clothes or anything. And I was wearing sneakers. And I was wearing sneakers. Like, cut, cod, cod. He's got sneakers. I can't do sneakers. So I said, I don't have anything else.

The director's like, I. He could have my shoes. He was so angry. I took off the sneakers and I put on the director's shoes. I swear I got this guy must have like a size 15 shoe, some sort of slip-on loafer. You could see it if you ever see it. The back of the shoe.

We are going to see it because you have got to find the tape. The back of the shoe is coming off my foot. You could see it. There's like six inches coming off the back. Well, I sit on those directors chairs. Anyway, now I have to go around to meet the girl. And there's no way I could walk because the shoes would come right off my feet. so I just kind of slid

you could see me walking like I'm ice skating over to girls like what's wrong with this guy and I was just sliding over to her so I didn't come out of the shoes what a nightmare did you ever get recognized from that episode

never I still to this day like the people that I know from back on Long Island like where I'm from they know me more from that dating game than anything I've ever done so they all knew to watch but no strangers ever said everybody watched And now to the, I just, I still see people like, remember the dating game?

I'm like, yeah, I do. Well, nobody knew I was going to be on it. And my show aired every night at like 7.30, whatever, you know? And during the summers between junior and senior year, anyone that lived in the L.A. area that went to SC kind of knew to go to Stratton's at UCLA to go get drinks. And you had to wait in line. And so that night after it aired,

I went with my friends in my express black halter jumper, which was just the best shorts. Every time I wore that, it was just, a guy got my number. Anyway, so I'm walking to get in line. And people were like, you're on stud, you're on studs, you're on studs. And I said, I have got to make this a career. Yeah.

I was like, I love people recognize. I remember just going, I don't know what it is because I wasn't pursuing acting or film or anything at SC. I knew I wanted to do it So this really, so it worked for you in the end. It made me just, I just clocked that moment of like, wow, I really like it when people know

like, recognize me. Had you feel about it now all these years later? Well, I'm still very flattered that people like listen or whatever when they say they're a juicy scooper. Yeah. But you know, sometimes people are like the plane, the girl goes, weren't you

on the Chelsea Handler show? And I'm like, yes, I was, you know, but I've had juicy scoop for 10 years and you should listen to it and da-da-da-da-da. So it's like that, but no, I'm still so, like, happy that someone recognizes me. Still fun. From 10 years later, you know. Okay. So, Ireland,

Alex Baldwin's daughter, he, you know, she is lovely and she lives in Oregon and she's a mom and she speaks very highly of her stepmom, Hilaria. But she said in like her whatever blog or whatever

wrote this thing about how she She's like toxic family members. I tried to please them. They didn't want to be part of my life. And now they're not going to be part of my life. And I, in anyway, you know, page six picked it up. I personally think she's talking about like the cousins. Haley, baldwinners.

Like, I don't know. It's weird. I'm like, because if you're close to your stepmom, you're obviously fine with your dad now. You did his roast. She spoke high labor mom in it. And I was like, yeah, I think some, I think she was hinting at like, she never felt accepted by like the cousins in the Baldwin family. That's what I think.

Well, they're, I mean, they got a pretty extensive family. I think there's all sorts of, right? So I think there could have been. Isn't the one guy married to China Phillips? Yeah. Yeah. You know what it is where I think it could be? It's like if you have a family and it's Thanksgiving and you're a 10 year old girl and

maybe there's two other 10 year old girls that are cousins and you see them every Thanksgiving. and maybe your memory is that they didn't include you or you didn't feel comfortable like that will hold you and now at like 30 they probably would be like oh my God we'd love to see Ireland at Thanksgiving yeah you know what I mean

that's what I think it is I think it's like you cannot because I remember that at our family Thanksgiving's someone was feeling like oh those girls are you know they're sisters and I'm not just a cousin and I'm not like feeling included and the girls like don't know to because they're 10 Right.

Like too many times people are like holding a revenge for like a dumb, quote-unquote bully who was 10. Yeah. And it's like, yeah, they were awful. They were dicks. But chances are they don't even remember being a dick to you because they didn't know that they were doing something. I mean, some little people are evil and like on the verge of being murders. But others like, honestly, you just like, you didn't know that you were like excluding someone. Yeah.

Who knows? There was a childhood memory for you. Here, this girl who is fine, she fell off the Disney ship at five, five years old, about a month ago. Her dad saw her fall in. He immediately jumped in after her. The ship did everything. He had to tread water, like, holding her in the water for 20 minutes. The little boat got a, but it was that she fell through this portal thing.

Yeah. And people were like, how could that happen? You know, did the plastic break on it? Like, you would know. well now they're saying no the portal was this it had bars across it but it was open air okay and this is a photo of it and um that someone posted so i don't know who gets the credit but now they're saying that the mom like had her sit on the bar to take a photo yeah but if the dad was there to jump in he witnessed the stupidity as well and so they were trying to get a good

picture of the girl with the motion in the background. But does she do the, or do you think they'll still be able to sue the, the ship? Well, no, not anymore. I think there's negligence on the part of the parents. Yeah. Not supposed to put them up in like that. But what a great photo. Yeah.

One battle after another. Mm-hmm. By the way, horrible name for a movie. Yeah. Well, you don't know, nobody knows what it's about. No. It's about like. So it did really badly.

And I looked up, why did it just so badly? It costs $300 million. It's only at $100 million. They put, you know, Leonardo Caprio. But, yeah, people don't know what it's about. It's like a futuristic person, whatever, living off the grid. One battle after another. They're like revolutionaries or something.

The minute I heard the title before it came out, I go, that's just an awful title. There's that other movie that I think has a horrible title. That's Colin Farrell and Margot Robbie. Oh, I heard it was real bad. But it has a weird one. It's like the longest romance in time. once again. Like, it's like, yeah.

I feel like, you know, a lot of people talking about movies like this one. I mean, it's Paul Thomas Anderson. He's a big director. Right. Everyone loves his stuff. And it's got big stars. But I feel like the, you know,

advertising for movies is worse than it's ever been. I feel like I've heard nothing about this movie. I don't see commercials for it. I don't see anything for it. I feel like there's a movie out there called Roof Man or something. Right. Channing Tatum lives in her Toys R Us or something. It's like a based on a true story.

No, he lives in a McDonald's. I thought it was Toys R Us. Wait, he eats at a McDonald. He steals from McDonald's. That's what it is. Climes up into the roof. He lives in a Toys R Us, but he steals from McDonald's. Yes.

But he's a lovable criminal that's based on a true story? Mm-hmm. Why would that true story inspire me to go see it? It didn't. Nobody went. Anyway, I'm watching the commercial for it. I'm like, this tells me nothing about the movie. I don't, it's, I feel like the advertising has gotten real bad for movies and that's part of the problem.

There you go. It's my speech. I don't know why we got away from movies like my favorite genre, which is infidelity leading to murder in New York on a cold day. So basically you're talking about the Diane Lane. All of that. Mystery. Also, because those trailers suck you in. Yeah.

Because you can do a great trailer. you're like, oh my God, what is this about? Yeah. But those movies stopped being made because they weren't like the international superhero blockbuster things. Right. That's what everybody, that's the problem. And I'm like, no, that's what we want. We want like just a great classic twist at the end, courtroom.

Yes. Sex. Yes. Pencil skirt lifted up to the waist. The crying game. Remember the little dick in the crying game? The little dick all of a sudden we were like, what the hell? Remember that?

And we all were like. We thought the whole time, and then the little penis comes out. You know what I'm talking about, right? The crying game was a movie, which there is a surprise in it, but I remember my friend ruined it for me because we were, and nobody knew what the surprise was, just like, just like six, six cents, nobody knew what it was around the same era. No one knew what the trick was. And so they were sitting there and my friend goes, look at the hands, look at the hands.

Yeah. I mean, honestly, if you watch it now, how could you not know? How could you not know? Yeah. But that was sort of, but I think back then it was like quite controversial that this guy was falling for who he thought was a, you know, a natural born woman when she was trans and thought that he knew, whatever. And then there was some other, I don't even know what the movie was about. There was a whole other story to it. That was just one little element of it.

But 25 years ago, that was like a big deal. Now it's nothing. Okay. So anyway, to get people to go to the movies, Emma Roberts. By the way, just so. Yes. I don't know if you've heard. But I just saw J-Lo in an interview.

Her movie bombed really bad. Kiss of the Spider-Woman, bombed. Is it out? Yes, it's already out. It made $650,000 in like 2,000 screens. I'm sorry I'm getting nerdy on everybody. But it was like one of the biggest bombs in the last 10 years. Anyway.

But does anyone go to the movies? No, well, that's, yeah. So I'm like, does it even count? I don't know. Yeah. But she was on, I think, Howard Stern or something. And she was saying that he was saying, did you, any roles you turned down that you regret?

Yeah. She said she was offered that Diane Lane role in that Richard Gear, Diane Lane. I saw that. And she said, that's the one I regret, turning that down. She could have done it. Would have been good with her. Back then, young Jay-Law? Well, Diane got nominated for an Oscar for it.

Yeah. But the reason she did, because it was Diane, and it was like right after Diane cheats on Richard Gear with this guy. and sleeps with them. Mm-hmm. And she's, like, on the train going back to the suburbs. And there's this moment where she's, like, like, by herself thinking about the fucking. Yeah.

And then she's like, oh, my God. I got to, like, clean out my underwear. Oh. And she, like, goes to the thing, like, clean, like. That's why she got nominated for an Oscar? No, but then she starts to cry, like, the guilt. But then she's also, like, that was fucking amazing. Like, it was, like, the thrill of, like, when someone.

one does, like, cheat for the first time, I'm assuming, like, the thrill of it and the excitement of it, and then how quickly it can, like, derail your life. That's why I love that. Great movie. That movie. Chad Lowe. It's also on it. Oh, yeah. Roblo's brother. Yes. And she, anyway, but I heard that interview, too, and I thought it was great. And you always wonder, you know, well, everything always happens for a reason, yes. But if there was a sliding door thing and she would have gotten it. Actually, it would have been that big of a juicy movie. But she said she thought that the script probably to her read like a cheesy lifetime movie. Sometimes when I'd read scripts for things, I would be like, this is horrible, like about what I was going out for

things. And then I would see that whoever got it or whatever, and I'd be like, oh, like, it's really, sometimes it's really hard to read the word and see how it can be changed or directed or what. And you're like, who would have bought this piece of crap? Yeah. But then, yeah. they realize oh no it's because these all these people are behind it anyway i thought it was yeah i think it was that would be yeah she also said i don't i've never really been loved correctly and then the old boyfriend the waiter came out of the woodwork pissed pissed said she cheated on yeah wait i actually have that i think i have that saying right here he said um where my ex-wife jennifer lopez aka jalo jalo said that she said that she

never has been loved or capable. Stop putting us down. Stop putting me down with your victim card. The problem is not us, not me. The problem is you. You, the one who couldn't keep it in your pants. Whoa. But also, like, keep it in your pants.

It's because a dick would come out of a pants. How does a vagina pop out of a pants? I mean, I think it's just a term, you know. Sure. Yeah. You have been loved a few times. You have been married four times. And have, sorry to read this.

and have countless relationships in between. You have had good relationships. Oh, God. Well, he seems like he's ready to get a support group for J-Lo's exes together. All right. Sorry, dude. When she was talking to Howard Stern,

she forgot about you, and so did everybody else. No one was remembering the People article from 1992 when she married the waiter for nine months. Yeah. It was her officially first first, marriage, yes. Okay, so anyway, now there's now to, if you wanted to go to the premiere

of this other movie called Bagonia, which seems like another futuristic warfare, I don't know what it is. Emma Stone, she shaved her head for it. So if you wanted to go to the premiere and get the free popcorned sodas that they have at premiere movies, you can't if you shave your head.

You had to shave your head too, yeah. So all these people were shaving their heads. I mean, it's already hard enough to give people to go to the movies. Now you're going to make them shave their heads. What are we doing here? Come on, everybody. So fucking true. Yeah.

That's always such a weird thing, like a dairy to shave your head, kind of a thing. Okay. Now, Gweth Peltro and Chris Martin's daughter, Apple, she got on stage and was singing, and, you know, the video has gone, whatever, viral. It's not great singing. Okay. She's with a band. I mean, she was definitely, it wasn't like she just popped up on karaoke night.

Like she was, she's trying to do this thing. Okay. And of course, she already has a band and people that are like, yeah, I'm an out-of-work musician. Sure, I'll be the band guy of whatever. Yeah, your dad's in cold play. Yeah, like, yeah, I think we could do it. And of course, people are like, oh, my God, the singing is not good, give her a chance. And I will say, as like, nobody ever talks about the downside of being like a Nepo baby,

which is if you do have a desire to do something in your parents. world. Oh, yeah. I'm going to say not just acting. Because acting, yes, someone can give you the part, they can give you the script, you can do 10,000 takes till you come out decently, and you can take acting classes. That's an easier nepot than stand-up or singing. Oh, it's, yes. Because stand-up, I remember I one time asked, you know, Melissa Rivers or whatever, and I'm like, did you ever think of doing stand-up or whatever? And she's like, I did. But can you imagine, like she wouldn't have the luxury to doing it like you and I did with no eyes on us for several years

until we felt like we were good. And in today's world, like they would have a camera on you, whatever. And, you know, if you're that big of a start, especially back then, you know. And so I do think it's like kind of a hard thing. And I think like even Ray Romano sort of talked about it with his twins that like they kind of want to

do comedy, but it's like hard. I think that's why a lot of the sons and daughters of celebrities get a little messed up. I think it is taught. Yeah, it's definitely hard. So you can of not having kids. I always remember that was a bit of, or an interview or something, of Ricky Jervais, who didn't have kids. Yeah. And he's like, the chance, the chance is so high that I will have a spoiled rich kid who is not going to be as funny or successful as I and therefore will just be a heroin addict

It's my biggest fear because no matter what you do you know next thing you know you're on what's that show where you have to write a letter to your kids we all love you Oh intervention and then they run out the door That's why I'm glad I'm just I'm just the right level

Yeah Well Chris let's see the outfit Oh you want to see it? Yeah Okay we put it on it so yes I mean you look very like weird Andy Warhol-ish. Yeah, well, I'm supposed to be a character from a K-pop demon hunters. Yes.

And I'm the character of Baby Saja. Baby Saja. Can I just, can I interview Baby Saja? Because I don't know anything about Baby Saja. I'm going to tell you. Okay. Tell me about yourself, Baby Saja. I'm in a band.

How old are you? That's a good question. 59. No. I'm in a band and I sing a song that if you have kids, you would know, it's called Soda Pop. My Little Soda Pop! And it's like a... Yeah, so I'm in the boy band that is in K-pop Demon Hunters. Okay. And I'm Baby Saj, like, the head of the boy band. But it's not scary. So, like, your daughter watches it?

My daughter watches it. It's not too scary. No, it's good enough for a six-year-old. And it's real actors or it's cartoon? No, it's cartoon. It's an animated show called K-pop Demon Hunters. it's the number one most watch show in the history of Netflix ever it's a movie actually one it's only a one off a movie and it's and the women who are in it you probably know all the songs if you're once again have kids it's the number one Halloween costume this year and baby saja who I am is the number five costume this year okay so then what is your wife and daughter being they are going to be two of the women from k-pop demon heads I'm not sure they're

names. So is Beckett so excited about this? She can't get over it. She's never been more excited. I also have, uh, that I had to order online. I have these really, really tight purple pants that I got from Amazon and I wear those as well and some funny shoes. And I'll be walking around the streets of, uh, the valley. So are you just going in your own neighborhood? You go to a party? No, our own neighborhood. We go to like a neighborhood that's close to ours that has like a real good treat. Yeah. Now I feel like that's what everyone does is. It's our old. neighborhood we used to live in. Yes. It's amazing. Yes. I like where I love it when a neighborhood just knows we're the neighborhood. We're the neighborhood. Everybody be down. Yeah. And fucking

enjoy it. Am I the biggest story you've ever had on Juicy Scoop? I know you've had a lot of stars on here. Have you ever had anyone from K-pop Demon Hunters of the number one show on Netflix of all times? Speaking of Netflix shows, um, have you watched the Ed Gein? Yes. Is the name of that show Monster? Is it called something else? Yeah, it's a series. Are you watching it? I've watched two, one and a half episodes. I've tried.

Uh-huh. It's very dark. It's very dark. And his voice drives me nuts. Yeah, everyone's like, oh, he should get an Oscar. I'm always like, I don't ever, I honestly always think when someone's playing like a, whatever, a somewhat mentally impaired character throughout history. Yeah. And they immediately, because they're acting like, you know, they have something, they would be like, oh, my.

God, they got to give him the Oscar. And I'm like, as someone who does characters, that's actually, to me, so much easier than being a person like Diane Lane in Unfaithful and really playing like emotions. Yeah. To me, that's so much, once you got the voice, that's all you're doing. And because you're like psychotic, you don't really show a lot of emotion. I agree. Well, right now I'm playing Baby Saja.

Yes. It's much easier for me to be Baby Saja than it is for me to be. So how does Baby Sasha talk? I have no idea. I don't even know if I've ever heard Baby Saja talk. I don't watch the show. You know, my daughter's watching it, and I'm in the background thinking about life's choices.

I have to say the blue wig with the blue eyes, it's kind of stunning. Well, I have to cut the wig a little bit. This is what's going to happen in the next couple of days because I might have the wig on backwards. I think you do because it's like the big. Can you just turn it around? Okay.

Yes, absolutely you have it backwards. Okay, let me say I have it backwards. No, this can't be. All right, hold on. To the side. This is it. is it. I think this is it. Is it moppy? It's supposed to be

like... Yeah, that's it. That's it? No, that's not it. Push it back. Push it back. Push it back. I am. I'm trying. Okay. I think it's supposed to be like surfery kind of. And then this is the hat I got. I'm just not excited from a Halloween costume. I've got to like get something else, I think. And he has blue

eyebrows that I have to do inside I make my eyebrows. Oh, that'll be good. Yeah. And I can't make myself. Baby Saja is Korean, I believe. believe. So I can't do that. You know what I mean? That's pushing. Yeah, then I'm canceled. Definitely. Yeah. So I don't want to be that guy. So I'm going to be just the white version of baby Saja. Now, I know your wife is more like the

business side of Netflix. But I need to ask a question. Okay. When like there's an article that comes out and now people are just like, all right, when's the Netflix stock coming? Do you know if Netflix will immediately just tell their people go start making a doc out of that? Or do they all have to wait to be pitched? I think a lot of them are made privately and, you know, just on, and not Netflix buys them. Netflix doesn't necessarily produce all of them. Some of them are produced by other production companies and Netflix buys them from those production companies as far as I know.

There are some that are produced by Netflix, but others are taken. One time there was a crime happening, I don't want to say which one. And then the criminal was, the murderer was arrested. And Drake, in all sincerity, was like, well, now I'm kind of pissed because when the Netflix doc comes out, it's like, it's not going to be as fun for me to watch it because I know who did it. Oh, yeah, it is. And I'm like, oh, my God. And I think that's what's so interesting is like when we'll see, like, docs about things now. And younger people are like doing a TikTok summary.

And they're like, let me tell you about what happened to Heidi Fleiss. And you're like, how do you not know about Heidi Fleiss? And I'm like, oh, that's right. were old. I know. They don't know. I always were upset when I watched any of those murder things and they showed the guy, they went to the one guy and he had the orange suit on from prison. I'm like, well, I know he's in prison now, so I know he did something. Well, then they realized that they just cut it real close. You know, cut it real close. I put something over. And I'm like, why they were so close.

And I asked, I asked Keith Morrison once, and he said, you know what we've started to do is we will give them clothes. Yeah. And they will bring like a plant. Right. Like a plant and something else because they're doing it in the prison. Yeah. And they've realized that like that was ruining it because we had to watch the whole thing and think that actually it was the weird angry workman down the street that didn't get paid. We had to, the first half is, wasn't the angry workman that she was a bitch to that she'd ever paid? And then it's, but wait, she had a secret lover, but and then, no. And the whole time the guy's like the dad, the husband who killed her is like, yeah.

I don't know why this just memory just came up. I had a friend on Long Island, his name was Joe, who actually went and had an interview with John Wayne Gacy. You could, like, write him in prison and request an interview, and he would do them. That's the peacock wood, the devil in disguise. Yeah, my friend went to interview John Wayne Gacey. He wasn't a journalist, right?

He wasn't. Like a fan of serial killers. Okay. And he went, and at one moment during the interview, the prison went on lockdown. and John Wayne Gacy said to him, he goes, you know, I could murder you right now and nobody could stop me while they were on lockdown.

And he told me that story. And not wild? And what happened? He didn't, though. He didn't murder. How long was it dark for? It was like 10 minutes. He was in there with him on lockdown?

And was he talking about him, talking with him for 10 minutes? And he just did this for kicks and giggles. He was just into like serial killers. Did he stop him from being into serial killers after that? I'm not sure what he does now. I think he has a bad case of gout now I saw on Facebook. the rich man's disease i think so yeah he's not doing well there's a housewife and she has an older husband and i guess and the other girl to be mean said um well you're you're a you're a

you're a gout dick sucker whoa that you're sucking a dick that might have gout well i don't think the dick has gout i think it's your feet and everyone's like what's gout and i just remember I had a... What did you say? It's the greatest what? The conversation I've ever had. This is about whether your dick gets gout. So I had a Friday in post-college and she married a guy.

And then she would brag about everything about her life. We're no longer friends. And he did get gout. And she said, he has gout. And we're like, oh, what is that? Because we're like 27 and he was like 35, but like not healthy. And she goes, oh, you don't know? They call it the rich man's disease.

because it comes from like having like steak and lobster soaked in butter and martinis and cabbernet every night because you're so successful that you close a big deal and then you go to a fancy steakhouse with all your clients and then if you're super successful you get gout well my friend that I know who has it I don't think he got it from that he got it from eating like TV dinners Salisbury steak went down with the real house I was in Salt Lake City that people were like husbands were like wait can you get gout from your dick being sucked like people were so confused

and she was just like you know what you're a gold digger no you're actually worse than that you're a you're a gout dick sicker sucker that's a that's a

hardcore Chris tell everybody where they can see you next come see me everybody this like tonight this is a Thursday yeah so tonight I'm an off the hook comedy

I'm at Off the Hook in Naples, Florida, right now as we speak. And tomorrow night, I'm at McGirties, McCurdy's, Sarasota, Florida and McCurdy's this weekend, 21st and 22nd, McCurdy's in Sarasota, Florida. And then Sunday night to 23rd, this Sunday, I'm at the Miami Improv. How do you like that? I love it. And are you doing your typical thing where you land in Florida and rent a car and drive to every place? And drive and drive. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Then come see me, hey, everybody. to Chicago, Zanies, Chicago, Wednesday night, November 12th, and Rosemont Zanies on November 13th. Come to those. Hyenas and Albuquerque and then the Unit B in Santa Fe, New Mexico. Those are the next couple. For angiola.fun has everything. I have a podcast called Cover to Cover, if you'd like to go over and check that out as well. And he's on Patreon, and he's Patreon.

It's very, very good. It's a lot of fun. It's good to see you again. I feel like I haven't seen you in so long. How's everything going? Everything is great. You are going to do a gig with me somewhat locally. I'm excited about that.

At North Ranch Country Club. That's fun. Yeah. That's not over to the public, right? No, I mean, someone could, I think someone would have to invite you. The club members can invite people. Yeah. But, no, it's still intimate.

It's not like a huge thing. But I was pretty excited because they were like, oh, they posted it. And it's like sold out right away or something. Oh, really? Yeah. We're big deals. I know. And I was kind of nervous about it because it's like weird.

You know, so many people like, know me. Because you know them. But now I'm excited. Now I'm excited to like write more specific jokes to just like the world of these people. That's good. That'll be fun. Yeah. And I knew you'll be great too.

So I know they'll love all your stuff. Hopefully. Everybody. Thank you so much. Go to Heather McDollin. If you have not subscribed to Juicy Crimes, it is free. some people were confused. It's my new show every Wednesday and you can watch it on YouTube or listen for free.

Just subscribe. And I say subscribe because that helps. I saw your friend Matt who does juicy crimes with you. I saw him on a flight. Oh. I didn't say anything. Oh, you should have said right near each other. Oh, he's such a great guy.

Yeah. So nice. Anyway, thank you. I can't believe you're still this outfit. Yes, baby Saja. Hey, it's me. Baby Saja. I can't wait

Listen, if you guys are not following Chris Frangola On Instagram Instagram, I know Then you are not going to see His Halloween Delight And you post a lot

And you do really funny Off the cuff shit And you are missing out If you are not following I feel like I've just plateaued on those Yeah, they just stopped I've been at my same number For weeks

And then I jumped to the next thousand And then it went back down And I was like Yeah I know. I get a lot of unfollowing up. But my Instagram's been at 403 for so long, and I don't know how it works. But if you're there, then you're going to enjoy it. But if you're for some reason not following Chris or I, please go.

And you always put a lot of stuff on there, too. It's like they say just you've got to keep doing it. They said they did a study where they studied people who gave up social media for, I don't know, a number of weeks and how much healthier and better they are. I'm like, listen, we don't have the option to do that. I'm honestly envious of people that are like, I just turn it off. I don't even like, I have friends and they're like, oh, I don't, I'm like,

what's your Instagram? And they're like, oh, God, I think it's my dog's name. I don't even know. And I'm like, I'm so jealous of you. All my brothers, they have no social media. I'll show them Instagram. I don't even know what that is. It's crazy.

It must be so nice. No, these people actually go into bed or go to the living room and they watch a show without looking at their phone. I know. I can't even. I can't even imagine such a thing. I feel like one day I'm going to be like I'm free

and I can just put it away like and just I'm getting done. And now I, but up until that point. But you can't. You can't because it's so entwined in our business. So what do you feel like you're promoting constantly this? I just don't, I don't think you can do what we do without it. And it's the and the re and because of it, we're able to be successful. So I am not mad at it.

There's no way I can be here without it because I have to be here without it because I would be beholden to somebody at a network saying that I can speak three lines and a sitcom. Yeah. So, like, no, I'm so grateful for it, but it's, it is truly like, whatever, the our version of golden handcuffs. Like, you can't not do it. It really is. And sure you could maybe hire somebody to do it, but it's still, they don't, when they won't do it right, then that person gets weird. And then they go on a podcast and talk about you.

And like, oh, God. So I've heard. Life was like doing Heather's Instagram for a year. Like, let me tell you. Yeah, so you can't. This is the worst. All right. Love you, Chris.

Love you. Bye.