Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald - Comedienne Jiaoying Summers, From China to Standup Comedy and Motherhood
Episode Date: November 4, 2025The hilarious stand up comic and Tik Tok sensation Jiaoying Summers is here! Jiaoying shares about how she was almost given away during China’s one child only law. We get into the history of “over... population” theories and the colorism in China. I uncover her extraordinary life story from coming to America for college, her first marriage, her tiger mom and making it as a headlining stand up comic on a world tour. Don’t miss her stand up special on Hulu Nov.8. This episode is hilarious, educational, empowering and as always very juicy! Enjoy! Follow Jiaoying: https://www.instagram.com/jiaoyingsummers/?hl=en https://jiaoyingcomedy.com/?srsltid=AfmBOop5fJDxBzaX3IZTE4yT0vqcVU6UV7r9N6reu71RcZ_w2obG-deN -Reverse hair loss with @iRestorelaser and unlock HUGE savings on the iRestore Elite with the code JUICY at https://www.irestore.com/JUICY ! -Give yourself and your loved ones the most extraordinary feeling sleep with 25% off sitewide, plus free shipping and extended returns during Boll & Branch’s best sale of the year. Shop now at https://BollAndBranch.com/juicyscoop with code juicyscoop -Visit https://joinBLVD.com to learn more about Boulevard and book a demo to see if it’s right for your business. And for a limited time, Boulevard is offering new customers 20% off your first year subscription Subscribe to my new show Juicy Crimes!: https://bit.ly/juicycrimes Stand Up Tickets and info: https://heathermcdonald.net Subscribe to Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald and get extra juice on Patreon: https://bit.ly/JuicyScoopPod https://www.patreon.com/juicyscoop Watch the Juicy Scoop On YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@JuicyScoop Shop Juicy Scoop Merch: https://juicyscoopshop.com Follow Me on Social Media: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heathermcdonald TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@heathermcdonald YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@HeatherMcDonaldOfficial Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hello and welcome to Juicy Scoop.
I want to introduce you guys to Zhao Ying Summers, a hilarious female.
We have to always say female before stand up, God forbid.
A stand-of-comic who I met a little while ago on a fun boat.
day and your special is coming out November 8th on Hulu and you're gorgeous and funny welcome thank
you so much you are gorgeous and funny I am I literally just left a sacramento punchline and
your face is on the wall and I said Zing that is Heather he's like oh my gosh it's so stunning
you have to dress up for her you know as I got lazy recently and my fan complained that I saw
she dress up and she looked like a mop really yeah I said I'm going to have to glam up
for Heather. I'm very excited.
You know what's really funny about
the female stand-up
dressing up? So when I
started, you know, it was
like very conservative.
Everybody was wearing like pants, like
pants suits and
this is like the 90s
or they were like grunge, which
grunge was, I don't know if you know what grunge is, but
it was like not flatter.
In my worst, because I was like glam sorority girl.
But I still always kind of like
never showed my legs, always just
just wore like, I'd wear like skinny jeans and a blouse and whatever.
And then in the last like five years,
a lot of the newer up and coming younger female comics have gotten glammed up.
You, Hannah Burner, like I love that you dress up.
And you're like this outfit, is this from the special?
Yes, I designed it is my designer.
I told her I want a Chinese Chi Pow inspired a dress.
And she made this for me.
So we hand, there's a snake, I'm a snake.
my zodiac sign and so you have a snake
and she designed that gold means money
red is the china red lucky color
so we designed this outfit
I think it's great
thank you like you know no reason to diminish
being beautiful or sexy
but definitely in the group
of female comics that came up with me
there was that for sure in the beginning
to just because it was like well if you're
too sexy like that'll be distracting
from the jokes or you know
you'll look like you're just trying to
just that's all you're good for is like
showing your sexiness. So I think I love it that you can be so yourself. Tell us a little bit
about your background. Where did you come from? I'm from China, grew up in China. I was born in the
90s. We had a one child policy. So basically you can only have one child and Chinese family.
They are very traditional. They want to make sure they have a son to carry on the family
oppression. So when I was born, everyone was so disappointed. And I was told my father
took me to the dumpster he took me there is this all true that's all true this is not part of
the yeah that that was the plan it turns out it was actually there's a family was going to
take me because they can't have kids they're just desperate but another chinese family but yeah
they'll take a girl but my my mom just they just told me the story was they took me to dumpster
um i think my mother when my father gave me to the other family she just she regret it
and she she started screaming and she ran out and she took me back
How long were you at the other family's house?
No, I didn't leave.
They were there.
They were ready to take me.
But that was basically, it's a very rural area.
It may, they may sell me to someone.
So I don't really know what I would end up.
But then got my mother.
She wanted to keep me.
But she made sure that I know it every day.
Whenever I do something wrong, she goes,
I brought you back from the dumpster.
You know, you can't get A minus.
A man is not A.
Number one.
Did she, are your parents still here on Earth?
My mother, actually, she moved from China.
to America, I think when my daughter was about born to come to America to help me because
I just got a divorce. So she's actually living with me now. My mother moved to what happened
to your dad? He's still in China. We are trying to get him here eventually. He's a very severe
alcoholic, but now he stopped drinking, which is great because he had a stroke that helped.
But your mom is still married. They're still married. The Chinese people just don't believe
in divorce because they believe in suffering. They wanted to suffer because no more you'll suffer,
you get a better life, that means
they're married, you suffer more,
and you have a better life the next life.
Oh, then I'm definitely going to have a great life.
Okay, so
with that story, I have a little
some, like, historical
question. When did that policy
come into play in China?
I think it was the 80s,
around the 80s, because China found out
that our population is too large.
But India didn't care. India don't
give a fuck. They keep having babies.
India has more kids now, more population now than China,
but the Chinese policy wanted to control the population.
So they want every family only have one child,
but the Chinese are so traditional.
And now hasn't it like backfired, aren't they saying like?
Oh yes, for sure it backfired.
The gender is in balance.
There's so much more male and less female.
Therefore, a lot of rural area, the men,
they can't afford to have a wife.
So all the ugly bitches, they are demanding, you know.
You have ugly daughter and five brothers that she'll demand five cars, five houses.
For real.
So she can get married and then her brothers can get out of the house and cars.
And, I mean, they are so powerful now, the ugly girls, even the ugly ones.
Really?
Yes.
That is amazing.
So, you know, it's interesting.
It was just a weird time in history where there was like a lot of talk of overpopulation.
And my mom had five kids and I was the fifth.
and she said one day
during that like talk of the news
was like viral news stories of
populations
she was at the grocery store
with all five kids
you know and we were within 10 years
to like the oldest
would be like nine
and I'd be like an infant
and she said
on more than one occasion
someone would come up to her
right here in the valley
L.A. and say how dare you
overpopulate the world like this
with your kids? People are so
annoying. Well it's just it's just
whatever
is in the news you know it's like you know I just saw a funny video that was like you know
if the if the health people came from the you know there was a time when they said eat the eggs
and they said don't eat the eggs and they said only eat the egg whites now they say no you can
eat the whole egg like there's just things where we don't really know what's going on so with
that um did they really they really did send like the little girls down the river right um for the
families, because you can only have one child, once you have a girl, you will never be
allowed to have a boy anymore. So whenever someone has a girl, they hide the girl.
For someone, they can send their girl to the relatives to hide it. They can hide that.
Or someone, they just don't have a choice. They leave the girls by the trash can or by the river.
There's the dead girl values. So is that when other countries were then starting to adopt the girls?
Most girls got adopted in the big cities
They would have the chance
But in the rural area
They don't really have access for adoption
For an international adoption
Yeah, they just get rid of the girls
So they can have a chance to have a boy
So what if then you have your girl
And you're keeping your girl
And you get pregnant again
And you do have a boy
Then who gets the boy?
You don't get to get pregnant
They will forcefully
Steeradize you
So after your mom had you
She had to go to the doctor and they had to sterilize her?
In a lot of case.
In a lot of case that you basically, they are going to get birth control device in you that is really, really like severe.
And if you don't learn from your lessons, you get sterilized.
If they find out you are hiding kids.
Oh.
It's like there's sometimes they will inject to your stomach when they found out you are having a second child without permission.
I swear we're going to get to the funny stuff.
But I just, this is just fascinating to me.
So when did it, is, what's the policy now?
When did it change?
Now, China want more kids.
So when did it switch?
Like around what time?
After late 90s, mid-late 90s, it switched because the gender imbalance become a problem.
And the human trafficking become a problem.
People are taking advantage of the little girls.
And that become a problem.
So the government canceled that.
And now, because it's so expensive to raise kids and send them to education, a lot of younger Chinese people, they don't want kids.
kids. And now Chinese government is encouraging couples to have two kids. They'll pay your money to
have a second kid, third kid. Wow. See it changes. Like I knew some of this, but you really
explained it well. So when, so you're growing up in this rural area as an only child, when and how
did you come over to America? I don't know. I was told a thing about, for example, being a
girl, you have to be quiet. You have to be sweet. You have to be obedient. That's the attractive
traits of being a girl. I happen to be a very loud girl. I want attention. I was ambitious.
And I wanted to be all the school plays. I like to read and study. But I was told that
in Chinese beauty standard, I'm too ugly to be in any school place because of my big cheeks,
my big lips, and I like to be in the sun, so I'm dark. I don't believe it. I just, but I
I don't think I'm ugly.
My mom said, it's a gender.
Like, your face is looking like a pretty boy.
You can be a good-looking man.
But as a girl, you're just not attracted.
So saying that to you at what age?
Very young.
I was three, she would just tell me your lips are like dumpling lips, you know.
Suck your lips in because big lips is ugly in China.
They want girls to have little baby bird asshole lips like, like this.
Like big lips is like girls with all lips.
People just think we are like problem.
So was your mom the epitome of a tiger mom?
Yes, she definitely is.
Okay.
Yeah, I got, I got whipped every day for breathing.
She, she, I didn't believe it.
I saw, I saw she was lying to me, but then I want to wear pink the dresses and all the girls
would throw egg at me, be like, go back to Africa.
That's how racist they were against, even like, I'm a Chinese girl, I'm not even dark.
I look Filipino at most, and the colorism is insane.
Because not really about racism, more about the classism, because in Chinese history,
They favor fair skin, light skin, because if you have light skin,
means you never went to the farm.
So being rich, you know, classism, like you, being wealthy is considered attractive.
So if your skin's dark, it means you are a farmer.
You're not attractive.
So I was born with dark skin because I look like my dad.
My dad had dark skin.
But if you are a man, you have dark skin.
It means you work hard.
It's attractive.
But as a woman, you have to be hidden in the room.
You never seen the sun because your family is wealthy.
you don't have to work
and I just
I had no idea
I couldn't audition
for any school plays
and I auditioned for
Mulan and I
they told me
you can play Mulan's father
that's
in China
in China
I was playing
Mulan's father
that's
because my big cheeks
they were like
that's you're a man
I always was called a man
and I finally
just stopped
trying to be cute
I still felt
I'm cute
but I kind of
got my hair short
and I start wearing
cool boys outfit
I didn't feel
but I just thought
they were not ready
for me
I just
I didn't think I was ugly
But it was sad
You know
I wanted to be popular
I want to wear the pink dresses
That's why
Now I'm a big girl now
I want to wear all the beautiful dresses
I want to be a girl
I want to have my long hair
Finally speaking of that
I enjoy so much
I saw in your Instagram
Really great clips that you share
Everyone should follow her
But you had someone in the audience
Who was from Thailand
And you were like
Oh did you check the
And you just touch the middle of your throat
For like the Adams apple
Since we're just talking about
history and, you know, what's true
and what's not. Is it really
true that one out
of ten boys is sort of sent to be
a lady boy? Yes, in Thailand
because sometimes it's
in Asian culture, like for example,
if you date a Chinese boyfriend,
a real Chinese boyfriend,
Chinese Chinese, once you start
dating engaged, the boy is going to
get you 10 sets of gold jewelries
and the gold jewelries. And it's
his responsibility to buy
an apartment for you as a commitment like engaged married the boy has to buy a house for the
girl and him and he has to buy a car like it's just your responsibility if you can't buy a house
in a car you can't find a wife in Asian culture is that's a commitment is security you have to give
the woman the security okay so she can commit her life to you so same in Thailand is the same
Asian culture is that a lot of rural area in Thailand the boys they are born they would not their
family have two or three boys, they can't afford to get a wife for the second boy because
they can only afford one house, one car. So the second boy would become a guy who never
got married. So it's cheaper to make this boy a lady boy so they can perform and entertain
and make money and make a living for himself or herself or themselves. I don't know how to say
that. So even so they start raising them as a lady boy. It's not like the child is like I see
myself as a girl. No. No.
The family don't have a choice because they want to make sure this boy would not have
to be starving and they can't find it. Because in Chinese culture, if you are a man, do any of
the lady boys ever like escape and go back to being a guy? I think, I think there definitely
there are. Wow. Yeah. It's the biggest problem in Asian culture is if a family had a son and they
don't have the ability to get
the money and security for the son
to get married, for a son to not get married
and the family, the parents believe
themselves. It's for
the rural area. The big cities, they don't care.
The kids, they never get married.
They don't, like, their minds
are more open. You know, they respect their kids.
A lot of Chinese young kids, they are very
open-minded and they don't want to get married.
There's people are gays and
there are lesbians and they want to live
their life. But in the rural area, they don't know anything
more than, okay, if I can
I'll get my son a wife.
I'm just going to do whatever.
What about the robots?
What about just getting like a robot wife?
Do you think that's going to happen?
They wanted to have, like, they wanted to have the son to marry their wife and have a baby.
To have a real baby.
But I'm saying, do you know of any, like, young men that just say, forget it?
Yeah, for sure.
I'm just going to get this, like, robot or this, like, you know.
Yeah, a lot in Japan, I think.
Yeah, like, oh, like, you know, where they look like a sex doll.
like a sex job, but they're like high-end.
Yeah, I think so.
That will be for people in the big cities,
Cosmopolitan.
Oh, my gosh.
Like wealthy kids who, yeah,
some men, they give up a woman.
They want a sex doll who's very submissive.
They can do whatever they want.
Well, yeah, what are you going to do?
Sit in the corner.
Yeah.
She can't get up and go out with her friends for a four-hour brunch.
Yeah.
If she's sitting and she's a doll.
Yeah.
So, okay, so how old did you come over here then?
I was 18 and I wanted to come to America.
I wanted I was planning for four years before I was 18 when I was 14 I already knew I want to come to America
because my mom was helping with her her little her niece she was she was much older than me
she was 10 years older than me the niece she got married when she was 22 and then she wanted
to open a business is a is a video rental like a little movie CD rental business my mother
helped him it it was near her restaurant she said I help it with your business but you have a
babysit Jiao Ying, after he come from school, you know, after middle school, you have to
help with her homework and let her sit in your business. So I stayed there. My whole time I was
setting Japanese porn to people because we have the pair of Japanese porn. They were just like,
it was all in China still. In China. I was setting Japanese porn phones. I was 11. I just set
the porn CD and they gave me money. And I do my homework and I started to watch the Hollywood movies.
I started watching the women, women, dark skin, beautiful woman, Latino woman, black woman in the movies.
I just, they are so beautiful.
They got beautiful cheekbones.
They get dark skin and big lips.
But obviously they are so beautiful.
Why am I ugly?
Like, what's wrong with this beauty standard is fucked up?
So I said, I can still do acting.
I just cannot be in China.
They are not ready for me.
I got to go to Hollywood.
I'm going to America.
But I can't tell my mom that because she thinks actress are prostitutes.
So I just also know, because I have no connection in America,
I was thinking about I could never become a starving artist.
I would learn how to do business.
how to make money
so I can use the money I make
to train myself as an artist.
I learned,
I study a lot of all
the Confuciism and
Iching and the Chinese
the art of war.
I wanted to learn how to be a successful person
but I wanted to not struggle
from like,
because once you want money from people,
you don't do art.
You go to audition,
you're begging them to give you a rose
you can pay rent.
It's not art.
You are so pressured to do things
that's for money.
Yes.
So I wanted to make sure
I learned something
I can make money
so I told my mother
I want to learn finance
in America
I want to learn economics
and she said no
because I was very good
at school and I got
I was getting
picking university
which is China's Harvard
for literature
she want me to go there
to become a professor
I love writing
and reading
but I also like to perform
I want to do all of it
but because how I look
in China
I can't even get in a drama school
because of my look
that I wasn't pretty enough
It's just so crazy
because
hopefully you guys
jump over to the YouTube and watch it but you
by all standards you're gorgeous
thank you that's yeah I mean at least in America
in 2025 you're very very attractive
so that's just so interesting I mean
what does your mom just to jump forward to today
is your mom has your mom gotten any nicer
like what's the deal I think
I think the moment I started giving her money
she just kind of forgave me for being ugly
and also China has changed a little bit
become more open-minded about
tan and
a little diverse beauty
but it's still very tough
very judgmental. The Chinese actress
they are 90 pounds and they are
bleached white.
I was doing a Chinese movie
my first marriage. I was in China
I got in a Chinese TV show
and I was
instructed to do
a jaw surgery because my jaw was
too big. Too wide. Too wide.
I don't look like a woman. They said
you look like a man or like a trans woman, whatever.
So they want me to shave my jaw.
Also, they want me to bleach my skin.
I didn't want to shave it, so they did the haircut,
like a bub haircut.
They glue the hair on my cheeks to cover my face.
And they bleached my skin, but they make my face so white,
but my neck's dark, so they started to ivy, like ivy treatment,
ivy bleaching.
And did it work?
Yeah, I got white, but they also just think I was too fat.
I was a size of zero, but in China, like,
I was too big.
So I was eating spinach.
So one time I was on set and I fainted.
I passed out.
I said, I can't remember my line.
They're like, don't worry.
Move your lips and stand there.
We hate your voice.
We have a voice over actress who's very talented.
I was like, okay, you hate my face.
You hate my body.
You hate my skin.
You also hate my voice.
I don't think I should do this.
Yeah.
I am done.
And how old are you then?
I was 26.
So I decided 27.
I decided to came back to America.
So you were in America, but then you got a job in China.
And she went back.
Yeah, I host the Chinese Shanghai Film Festival.
And that's when I met my husband, my ex-husband, the father of my kids.
You met him where?
In Shanghai.
I was hosting the Shanghai Film Festival for the English section.
So I met him there.
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Scoop code juicy scoop for 25% off exclusions apply and he was he in the film business too he was
he was in telecom and this trading whatever he was wealthy but it was a very bad it was a very
bad experience it's a very bad marriage in the beginning it was gaslighting you know everything
is beautiful love bombing yeah love bombing is a word love bombing and what was his ethnic background
he's a chinese man he's oh from china was he american too though or no he's very chinese but he was
was kind of international. He speaks English well. He was very handsome, very charming, very
good looking. So I was love bombed by him. Okay. And then... It's a good lesson. A lot of
materials. Yeah. Yes. And then when did the love bombing stop and you realize who did
who the fuck did I marry? He's not like, he's not calling me ugly and fat and he's not saying,
your legs are so short, you know? You should be wearing high heels. I said, but I'm pregnant. He goes,
yeah, you're still short pregnant. You look shorter.
you're feather now.
I think because he's insecure down,
he wants to chip away my confidence.
So he can control me like a caged bird.
He'll pull your feather one day by one.
You don't realize.
It's like when you are boiling a frog with warm water
slowly increasing the temperature,
you don't know until you're like,
okay, I'm dead.
So it took me a long time.
He started saying things like,
oh, you look very tired with no makeup on.
Please make sure when I wake up,
you already have your makeup on.
I don't want to look at your face.
Now, where were you living when he was saying this
and you were pregnant with your first child?
I was in Beijing.
Okay.
And did you, you said he was wealthy?
So did you have a nice home that he was providing for you?
It's a very luxurious home.
But when I met him, I was in finance.
Would you be one of those Chinese people that like went and bought the high-end real
luxury goods?
Yes, I didn't buy that.
He bought them because his friends are all rich and wealthy.
Because I came to America as a struggling student.
I worked five jobs and then I got in finance and I made my money but I'm not
obviously not as rich as him but the money I make I can support my grandpa and my
grandmother and my mom you know that's like comfortable you were doing finance in
what part of America I was in I had a job in Orange County to do to do to
hedge fund and the same time I was taking acting classes with Howard Fine I was
auditioning I love Howard Fine I got his a big class and I got his master class so I was
training, acting. I started auditioning. That's when I met my ex-husband. I wasn't wealthy,
but I also, I would never buy expensive bags. I would use the money to buy my apartment,
pay my mortgage. I didn't have the money. He bought the good things, the expensive stuff,
because he wanted to make sure I. Show off. I don't look poor in front of his friend's wife.
That's what he did. So he wanted you to have like the nice bag. Yeah, he won't give me the nice
things, but he actually, slowly, he fired the maid. He said that you should be cooking.
As the wife, if you don't cook for me, that you are not beautiful wife.
He stopped becoming a different person once I got pregnant.
And so then you had your baby and who's that?
I had the first baby, my boy, my son.
How old is he now six?
And after I had him, I moved back to America and I wanted to leave him.
But because of this boy, and he's a Chinese man, and if I don't have enough money, I can't take my son.
So I wanted to get myself a career.
Because if we got married in California, it's a different story.
I have more rights as a woman.
But in China, the richer part of the spouse is going to get whatever they want.
So I want to come back to America.
John Singleton, I remember I auditioned for John Singleton.
And it was for one of the show called The Rebel.
And there's a black girl, it's a cop.
Her best friend is a Chinese girl.
So he asked me, what you think?
I said, that's Russia on her budget.
And he's like, you know what?
You should try to stand up.
You're going to be a star.
I said, do I have the job?
He goes, no, I don't understand the word.
you said, bitch. But he did.
So he suggested you do stand-up.
He suggested, and he introduced me, we had a lunch and he gave me a whole history of
a stand-up because in China, we don't have stand-up.
Stand-up is new recently six, five years ago.
But I had no idea you can make a living.
I always been funny.
I always talk.
I like to write.
So I said, I'll try open mic.
I try to open mic.
I obviously, I bombed.
But there's something there I felt that gives me more freedom is because as an actress,
you'll wait for that audition.
Yeah.
But as a comedian, they can laugh at us all they want.
They can make fun of us, but as long as we're getting on the stage, we're getting better.
So I knew I want to do this.
And I asked him, how can I get good?
He goes, get 10,000 hours before you can get 10,000 hours.
10,000 hours before you can find your voice.
Okay.
I was calculating that's not going to happen with the open mic is waiting around.
Especially here in L.A. It's so hard, you know.
So one week later, I bought a comedy club.
You buy your own comedy club.
I still have it.
It's on Melrose.
and Covinga is in Hollywood.
What's it called?
It's called Hollywood Comedy.
Oh, okay.
So I wanted to have a place I can perform.
I saw this storefront on Maros.
It's in Lashmont.
So it's cute.
It's for lease.
I went in there's a closing store, and they have really ugly clothes.
I'm like, okay, I'm taking the lease.
So two weeks later, I made it into a little black theater, black box theater.
And then I started to host the Open Mac there.
I will have a ton of open mic a day.
every hour there's a different audience
we have one committee on stage
eight people watching and you
you know rotates and I was the host
so when you are hosting you got to do all the dirty
job I host a 10 hours a day
I work like a communist peasant
and two months later there's COVID
Now at that point when you're doing that what's your marriage
What's it happening with your marriage then? It's falling apart
He would just tell me I come home and you have a second child then
Not yet okay I wasn't planning actually was a mistake
Okay so I was just trying to
see if I can get a career.
I was a mistake, but my dad said,
no, we're going to say you were a surprise.
Oh, and you are the joy to the world.
Yeah, both my sister and I were surprises.
But, so you were not planning on having more with him
and you did get pregnant.
I did.
And I remember that I want to keep the baby
because I had really bad experiences when I was in college
that I was in love with this guy
and he was my fiancé and we were going to get.
married and I found I was pregnant and he basically pressured me to have an abortion because
he was cheating on me with another girl. He was about to leave me. That's why. So I didn't want
to. Where did you go to college? Kentucky. University of Kentucky. How did you end up in
Kentucky? I remember I was applying for different schools and my mother wasn't helping me and I actually
so but did you finish high school in China or you finished here in California? I finished high school
in China. Oh and then so from China you were applying to all the different schools. So from China you were
applying to all the different schools in America.
I got my first offer from Kentucky.
And my mother wasn't applying me for me to go.
So I just want to go to the first school so I can go to America first.
And I can move to wherever I want.
And then they gave you a scholarship?
I didn't get a scholarship.
And I worked different jobs to pay for my school.
And that's where you met this guy and fell in love.
Yeah, I fell in love.
And he was a nice, looks like a nice guy.
But obviously.
So it was the first time.
So then when you were pregnant with your daughter this time, you were like, no man's
going to pressure me to do something.
Even though I don't want to do.
Even though she wasn't planned, I didn't plan for her, but I wanted to make sure this baby, I'm going to be the person, decide.
I'm keeping her, I'm going to give her the life.
She's not going to fuck me my life up.
If I kept my first baby, this guy pressured me to not have it, and I regret it forever.
It's because it wasn't my choice because I'm a peasant.
Like, I would work nine jobs to keep the baby alive.
I don't need a man to tell me, oh, we can't afford it.
I can afford it.
That's the problem with me, is that I hate that, that I respect what he was.
want it, not what I wanted, because I could afford a baby on my own, even though I didn't
have money, but I worked so hard, I would have fucking get my shit together. So this time,
I'm like, no, I'm going to keep this baby. Do you know what that's, have you ever heard
the expression, do a Hail Mary? What's that? You know what that mean? That is, um, that would
go among men talking. And I remember I heard a very misogynistic LA, maybe he wasn't LA, maybe
it was syndicated, but when talk show before podcasts, there was this guy, and I can't remember
his name. And he was so disgusting. But basically, I would be intrigued to watch, to listen to him
because he would be like preaching to men, like how to get a hot woman to do what you want.
And he was just the most disgusting guy. Anyway, he's a pickup artist. So he said, yeah, so he said a
Hail Mary is so a woman that you, you know, don't want to spend the rest of your life with her. You don't
want her to have the baby, says she's pregnant, then the thing that you're supposed to do is say,
you know, I love you. We're going to spend the rest of our lives together. This just isn't the
right time. That's what he said to me. And then, and, and, and in a couple years, we'll have the money,
we'll have the house, we'll have the kids. So he convinces the woman to do something she doesn't
want to do in ending the pregnancy. And then, you know, is nice to her, brings her some food after
going to the doctor
let a little time pass
and then
then that's what he did
yeah that is horrible
I had a friend that that happened to too
very sad
she really believed him too
she really was like
okay yeah you're right
you know and but
believed that this
that he loved her
and that they would just make it happen
at another time in the future
wow that's exactly what happened
I was very young I didn't know
but at that time I
wanted to give this baby the life
that she deserves
and he did whatever the gender is.
So I didn't have a plan B.
I was already planning on leaving my ex.
So every day I work 10 hours
and there's a pandemic, everything closed down.
And you're doing comedy at this time too?
Yes, that's when I started doing the open-man club.
And I remember that everything shot down during COVID.
And I go to my club.
I talk to the empty walls.
I just read my jokes, like putting in the audience.
And I just was thinking, what happens when this thing opens?
Because I have to make it work.
my career work fast. How do I do that? Then I started posting, I start writing jokes and I
started to talk them on stage to nobody. I start filming them and posting them on TikTok.
It was embarrassing because, you're not funny, you're stupid. You have an accent. You should go
fuck yourself. You know, I'm like, it's so rude. Like, are you a, are you like massage for?
I mean, I think your mom might have prepared you for a TikTok comment. Everything, this girl's like,
oh my gosh, she was so pretty. You're like, you're nothing, TikTokers. Yeah. You're nothing, you mean
bots. I grew up with a Chinese mom.
Yeah, and they'll say, oh, my God, you were so pretty before the baby.
Now you're so fat, you're ugly?
I'm like, you think I was pretty at any point?
Oh, my gosh, do you want flowers?
My mom never told me that.
You think they are mean to me?
I'm like, oh, honey.
So I started posting everything, and slowly I found out that the thing I talk about my real life, my struggle, the culture differences.
Those are the stuff that worked, that they go viral.
So I think social media helped me find my voice in a year rather than 10 years.
Because as a real comedian, it takes you 10 years.
It took you a 10 years to find your voice.
Yeah.
So when I was starting, they would say, well, you can't start stand up in L.A.
You need to go to Chicago or New York where you can get up on stage three times a night for five years.
Then you try to get an agent.
And they even said, don't let anybody see you until you've done it for two years.
Don't invite agents or whatever because they'll remember you being like green and shit.
and that'll stick in their mind
even though in three years you're better.
And so I was like, well, I grew up in L.A.
and I have friends I can invite, you know,
and family that are encouraging me to do stand-up
and want to see the stand-up.
And that's, even back then, I realized,
there is no,
stand-up comedy is not becoming, you know,
a neurosurgeon where you go to college,
then you do your OR, then you do, no.
There's different ways,
and especially in 2025 for funny people to shine, which I love.
The best part about social media, the worst part is you're fat, you're ugly.
You know, you're a loser or whatever.
That's the worst part.
But if you can get to a place where that doesn't affect you as much, it is so great
because you don't need to go out and, you know, you'd have to walk yourself to the car alone
and something could happen, or these male communions would act like they want to help you
and they really want to fuck you.
All these things.
Nothing beats a live audience, but it is a great way to test what is funny or what it's not.
Or when I do this podcast, you know, in deciding what clip to cut, I'll wake up first thing in the morning, read the YouTube comments and people going, I died laughing when da-da-da.
And then I'm like, okay, I think that might be a, and then sometimes it goes great.
And other times I'm like, why didn't that thing go?
All right, next one, next one, you know.
And then sometimes I'll take that funny story
that I didn't even think was funny that I set on the show
and put that into a stand-up.
So there's so many different ways.
And your story is obviously extremely unique and determined
and love the story of, you know, an immigrant who sees the opportunity
and just won't stop.
Like, that's just amazing.
And so then you kind of realized,
The things that did better were saying the cultural differences,
which is so true because it's the most universal.
It's like why the COVID jokes were the best.
Yeah.
Because everybody could relate to mocking the person who's driving in their car
with the windows up in a mask.
I think every comedian said that.
Yeah.
You know, and then it's that type of thing.
So, okay, so continue.
So you started to do that and you started to get some traction.
Yeah, I really believe that I found my voice.
like you said, you know, the audience were like, oh my, I died laughing at that.
You're like, okay, this is clicking.
And when you are talking about the story to your friend, you didn't even try and people
because love it so much, then it becomes such an organic great step of bit.
Yeah, I would always tell people that too, I'm like, if you are just starting and you want to
be funny, whatever that might be, maybe that's on substack, maybe that's just in a podcast,
maybe that's writing, maybe that's just telling a joke or doing a TikTok thing.
I'm like, it is when you're hanging out with your friends and you're just telling something
and they're laughing.
And then my friends would learn
and they'd be like,
write it down.
Yeah.
Write it down.
And now, like on the phone
and my notes,
I'll be like,
that was really funny.
Like I should work on that
and da, da, da.
So it is very much
when you are a naturally funny person,
which you are,
there, you've got to have that,
but then you've got to have
the tools
and the determination.
And, and you got,
but you can get better.
Yeah.
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View and enjoy. Via rail, love the way.
Like people say, oh, no one can teach comedy.
you can. There is
there is like a cadence and a way
of writing that's better and there is a formula
to it. And then, but what's
great is that it's creative and everybody
you have your own point of view
and that's when someone pops with their own point of view
like, oh. When you are
organic and you're not ponder into anyone.
Yeah. Especially as an Asian, female Chinese
comedian at the beginning of my
career, only Chinese people want to listen
to me, but I don't pander to them
and they hate me, they talk you about me.
But slowly I build my voice
as authentic and now they like me and now I have my audience are not just Asians I have
everyone who likes me because I'm not pandering to a certain person for them to buy ticket because
I look like them my my suffering and my joy is universal being a daughter being a mother
you know being the oldest daughter is it's universal and that's I'm just a human I happen to be
yellow and I happen to be a woman and I felt that I was so blessed to to have the chance to
posting things on my social media I post three times a day
I post all the way to the delivery room
I was throwing up morning sickness
posting I was talking while posting
so nobody
people tell me like I'm just not like you
I don't like to post I'm like you think I like to post
nobody likes to post
and when people want a bag on
influencers or anything like that
like oh she's just an influencer she's just
you know she just wears her outfits
I'm like you have no idea
how much work that is
and what a pain in the ass it is
and like there's nothing I like better than going to a party
and this doesn't even happen very often
I wish it happened more
where they're like sometimes
at a Hollywood party
you need to put your phone over there
That's good
I'm like thank you
Real conversation
And I don't feel like I'm missing opportunities
And I should be posting
And I should be da da da da
And yeah there's a certain point
where I'm like whatever
I'm just not going to do it that much
Or whatever
But yeah like you people have no idea
How much work it goes into it
and how, just like any other art form,
sometimes you don't just pop like Alex Earle
after, you know, doing it for six months.
It might take years.
Yes.
But as long as you're enjoying it, same with stand up,
when someone would say, how long are you going to give it?
I'm like, well, I get really excited when I have a set.
I get a little nervous.
I'm excited to do it.
I feel good after.
Yes, I'll just do it for as long as I,
but you don't make any money out of it.
Well, I guess I'll just stop doing it when I don't enjoy doing it anymore.
Yeah, that's about to join.
gives us.
It's my drug.
I feel alive.
I make people laugh.
And I'm creating.
I love that.
Did you have any other female stand-ups that along your journey or before you even started,
that was like an inspiration or that you really liked watching?
I feel I can be very real with you is that it's very, very funny.
The unfunny female comics, they are very toxic towards me.
The good ones, they are so nice to me.
the one who's successful, who made it, who had their name,
they were just extremely nice,
and they have nothing to gain from being nice to me.
And it just, it just is, you always hear, oh, someone's big, she's a diva.
But actually, my experiences are the comedians, the female comics that are not funny,
don't have a career, they will just tell me that, you know, you are too loud.
You should, your accent is the problem, you're never going to make it.
Or like, you can't dress up, you're too dressed up.
Right, you're too.
You're too sexy.
You're going to distract the audience.
Your accent's too thick.
People can't understand you.
You're never going to make it.
Or just they talk shit about me.
I don't even, like some people and I would help, they talk shit.
But the ones, people like you, people like Nikki Glazer, Margaret Cho, those women, they are just, like, you got a way to help me.
Like, Nick Glazer, she will just, she'll introduce me.
She will try to give me as much attention and respect when she introduced me.
She'll spend two minutes to give me an intro.
that she's running her set for Golden Globe.
I'm not going to give her anything for her career.
I can't give her shit. But she doesn't care.
And Margaret Cho, she did my podcast, and she talked to me.
Every time I post a photo, a video that she thinks I need support,
she shared her story without talking to me, without anything.
And those are as a woman.
And I message you, and you just respond, yes, come here.
Let me, let me get on my show.
That's the love support I get is because you've been through where I was.
when you try to be good
and you try to become a good artist
and people try to take you down
and you've been through that
and so you'll see me you're like
I'm going to give her a hand
but the people who never made it
they are small and they want to drag you down
it's so sad
yeah I mean it is unfortunate
but I always remember that
about Joan Rivers
she was just so lovely
to Margaret Cho
to myself a few times
I got to meet her when we were both at E
and in her documentary
she featured Kathy Griffin
and Kathy Griffin like loved her
and she knew that she was still doing it
and she in it was like
oh my calendar used to be full now it's all
Kathy Kathy was at this is like
you know 15 20 years ago
and I was like oh
I remember watching that being younger
at the movie theater while I was doing
comedy works a piece of work
and yeah piece of work and I was like
wow I wonder
if that bothers her? You know, that, and it, it didn't. Like, it didn't because she loved it and
it's comedy and she never turned out anything. Like, before the internet, she was doing, like,
people's web episodes when they were called a webisode, which today would be the podcast,
YouTube, whatever. Someone asked her, she'd be like, sure, if I'm free that day, like, I'm never
going to turn down any work because next week somebody may not ask me. And it's like that
humbleness of like actually really loving the art of it
yeah is what you know keeps you in the game the longevity of it that is that is so lovely
so you're pregnant with the second one are you still when you gave birth to your daughter are
you still with your husband um no we have it was it's become very ugly and he started just
calling me names and tell me i'll never make it and it was just a lot of mental abuse and
verbal abuse. But the problem is because I'm a Chinese girl from China, that the verbal abuse
is just very normal. You got called ugly and stupid. It's just because also in my culture,
they don't compliment the kids because we believe if you tell the kids ugly names and call them
ugly, the less envy from hell. It's so, like there's less devil envy them, so they won't be
taken from you. The more you'll say you're beautiful, you're precious, they got taken by the
devils because they got envy so like I felt they think like if you tell your daughter she's
beautiful and boost her self-esteem there is a higher chance that something evil might happen
like a tragic accident and should die young yeah because the devils want to take her because
they are envious we want her what religion is that I think it's Buddhism that is also Confuciism
is very women should be humble and if you love someone like the income
They call Jiennay, my cheap wife or like goer, my dog of a son.
Like someone referred their kids as like humble, like extremely humble to show that I'm very humble about everything.
It's just extreme culture that I am used to that.
So when my husband, he calls me, you're so ugly, you know, you're so fat now and you're not smart.
You're not sharp.
I felt like mom, you know, I felt like I'm home again.
I didn't feel that he was foreign.
What did your dad?
What did your mom think of this husband?
Did she like him?
She did not like him because he was 20 years older than me.
But he looked so handsome that it didn't really.
He looked like he was 40.
It didn't really matter to me.
And I saw she would like him because she just wanted me to be rich.
And this guy is rich.
But turned out my mother, she wanted me to be happy.
And she thinks that I married him for the status for everything.
But I married him for her because she blamed that I,
so much of money because the first year tuition she paid for, and I just felt guilty for
going to America. So I wanted to pay off her debt. I wanted to help her. So it was just a very
sad little love story between a mother and daughter that she wanted me to be happy. She
wanted me to find a man my age. We can develop something together. But I saw she just resent
me for spending her money, and I saw she want me to pay her the money back. I didn't know
she just want me to be happy and she can't say it either because she can't say it she cannot say
it is a Chinese mom just don't say I love you I think the moment they tell their child I love you
is the moment they die so they can't say it right now really had she said it yet no no she can't
what about your kids as the mom say I love you she goes I you fat you know she I love you I love you
ugly like she can't say it she tell my daughter she's beautiful because like
Because she's so pretty.
She looked like your ex.
So they can be a nice grandma.
Oh, nice grandma, for sure.
Oh, that's good.
Just a very evil mom.
Yeah, she's so funny.
She gave me so much materials.
So it's great.
So, okay, so how do you tell the husband we're done, done?
I remember it was a big deal for me is when I was passed as a love factory.
I mean, as an open maker.
So now, where were you living in a?
with the husband and the two babies
while you're building this comedy club.
So he was wealthy,
so he bought like three, four houses.
One of the house, we rented out of the restaurant,
one of the house was in West Hollywood,
which I think is very clear.
Orlando is walking distance.
Yeah, I love that.
So I remember I got passed at the Love Factory
and I was so excited.
For people that, that means that now she can be on a list
to be booked for spots.
As an open maker, that's, I mean,
It took me two and a half years.
That was a dream.
But I remember he said, I was getting my hair done, dressing up.
I have to ask one thing.
Do you think these other comics were resentful?
Because in their eyes, it seemed like, oh, look how quickly she went.
And do you think that they also not knowing how hard you were working?
And they probably were not working that hard.
Do you think they were saying, oh, it's only because she's an Asian woman?
Yeah, because she's Asians in the diversity.
That's why she won the diversity lottery.
But I was the one who can sell ticket.
I had a million followers on TikTok.
They have no followers.
All my jokes are my jokes.
It can only, whether you're a Nepo baby or they're looking for a certain looker type,
that can only take you so far in this business.
No one's going to continue.
It's like when people talk about Kim Kardashian, oh, she had a sex tape.
I'm like, do you think a million people are buying skims because she fucked radio?
on tape
15 years ago
I think she's
doing okay
I'm doing okay
I don't think
people are
going to continue
to watch her
on a new show
with Ryan Murphy
because like
so what
like you know
at a certain point
maybe something
might help get you there
but you're not
going to stay there
unless you're
talented
I think Chris Jenner
is one of the
best business woman
in the world
yeah
she is brilliant
and the thing
about her kids
is that
doesn't matter
what you say
about them
they are extremely
authentic. They say
they own their mistakes. You can
shame them, but they own everything.
And that's what I feel like
I understand
them more. It's obviously they are business. They are
great business. Yeah.
So sorry, so go back. So you get passed at the
comedy store. I'm sorry,
at the laugh factory. You're still with
the mean husband. Doing my makeup and hair
and he told me that, you know,
do you remember you told me when you were
a little kid, you stuttered, right? I said yes.
But I don't stutter anymore.
He said, no, no, no, no. I was reading in the article. It says that if you do a big performance, performance when you are in a doubt, you just start a stutter again because you are still nervous.
If you do a big what?
Big, like, performance.
Oh, big performance. So he's trying to psych you out before you perform that night.
He said, you don't, I think you should not go tonight because you're going to stutter and it will be a joke.
It would be so embarrassing. You probably want to kill yourself after that.
For your first night of, like, doing a regular show at the laugh factory.
I said, I said, I don't stutter anymore. He goes, you don't stutter anymore. He goes, you don't stutter any.
anymore, I started stuttering.
I got so angry.
I said, I don't know, and he started stuttering like me.
I just lost my shit and I slapped him.
The moment I slapped him, he grabbed him to the sink, and he started choking me.
The moment he started choking me, I took a cutting board and smashed his head.
So, like, I can, I understand physical abuse.
When some men punch me, I'm going to strike him.
And where are the two babies at this point?
My mother had them in the other room, the house upstairs.
You're about to go do a funny set.
Downstairs. Yeah.
So he basically grabbed mine.
Because he's not a violent person.
When you say downstairs, wait, you were at your house when this happened.
But you had to go down the street to the laugh factor to perform that night.
I was downstairs getting ready.
How much time between this incident and you going on stage?
It was around 30 minutes.
Oh, my God.
I still performed.
And I remember that I, he choked me.
He never touched me because he's not, he's like a mousy person.
He's not physically violent because I slapped him.
so as a man he was like oh my god
I smashed him with the cutting board
my mother she just she heard something
she ran downstairs and she took a big
vase and she smashed on him
she goes I'm gonna fucking kill you
don't you fucking touch my daughter you piece of shit
and she chased at him with a knife
and he left
and then I fell for divorce next day
wow
yeah that was
did you get a lawyer or did it yourself
I got a lawyer
he wanted to get me back
He thought it was a joke.
I said, no, no, it's not a joke.
I don't, I don't play with this.
You don't touch me.
Then he's like, then I realized he thought I would be okay with that because I took all the
abuse.
But for me, it's like, because I'm traumatized.
I didn't know that was abuse.
But I know hitting, striking is abuse.
Are you almost grateful that it went to that place?
I am.
If he's still calling me fat and ugly, I'm still with him.
Yeah, I'm so happy.
I just.
That it crossed that line.
I crossed that line.
And I felt divorced.
And he basically made a deal with me.
He goes, you know, if you want to see the kids, I'm not giving you any child support, nothing.
Because we got married in China.
He's also Chinese.
I said, listen, I make it very easy for you.
I don't want to drag this down with you for two, three years.
Because I don't have money.
I don't have time.
You got money.
You got time.
You're retired.
I don't have any money.
I don't have no time.
I have to work every day.
So I want two kids.
I want no child support, no spouse support.
I want you to sign the divorce paper right now.
And he did it.
and then I had to figure out
how do I raise my kids
So we had to...
Now what year was this?
That was
2020
I think that 2020
2020, right early spring
2021.
So things are just starting to open up.
People are just able to go out.
Yeah.
Oh my God.
So I had nothing.
I downgraded and I started selling my jewelry.
All the money I saved.
So you sold the expensive jewelry.
jewelry and my bags
and then I made some money
I made around like a
700,000 dollars
my whole life saving before I met him
because I quit my job after I married him
because I'm like you should be working
but I mean like the jewelry in the bags you're saying
you made 700 no no those are just
the 700K went to the house that I put part of the house
down payments so he wanted me to pay him
half the house to buy him out
so I had to mortgage the house to pay him
another like a million and I'm paying
were any of the attorneys like
fuck this guy you could do better than this
they hear that so much
it's insane and I was
I had to do a line of credit which is
extremely high I was paying 10 grand
amounts because I felt like
I moved to a different house a smaller house
that is a house I put a down payment for
I just feel like the kids
left lost their dad I don't want
to lose the house
did he stay in America or go back to China
he went back to China
so he is not in their lives
He sees them.
I allow him to see them.
Now I'm doing better.
I said they are going to find out who he is when they grew up.
I don't talk shit about him in front of the kids because I don't want to make them feel insecure about their half, human half-busted, you know?
I want them to find out what's wrong with this man when they grow up.
And so he wants to see them, he can see them.
And I'm not taking that way from him.
But I remember that the first time I made money.
My mom and I, we sell jewelry and I borrow money.
from my friends, I'll give them my jewelry
for two months. I'll borrow 20 grand
and then I'll give them the money back
and then I got my jewelry back
because I just sell
to the real real. It's like I lose so much money on my
jewelry and bags. I just keep rotating
setting everything I have until
one day, one day I start
setting my shows. I start setting
50 tickets, 100 tickets, 200 tickets
500, 600, then I start
to make some real money. Then I just... Was there a moment
where you were like
I think this is all going to
to work out. Like there was a moment in your career and life that you were like, I can breathe
for a half a second. Or has that come yet? Yeah, it came. I think it was a few years ago, a few years
ago, cops. I sold out back to back shows and then I got the money. I said, I can pay my three years.
I mean, I can pay my three months mortgage. I don't have to worry about next day. I didn't,
I wasn't vain. I'm always very down to earth. It just I wanted the kids to stay in the house they
used to stay. I don't want too much to change. I want them to stay in the same house and same
school because it's easier for them. They don't have to see how I suffer. You know, they just
wanted to, I want them to feel comfortable. You still live in West Hollywood? No, I moved to
Arcadia near Pasadena. Okay. We just bought a house in Austin, Texas. So I want to move to
my residence to Texas. I bought an apartment in Hollywood so I can stay here when I'm in LA,
but we're going to move to Austin for my residence.
I think. I want to do a ranch.
Yeah. And so
no. So when you
travel, because you have quite
an extensive tour,
then your mom stays
with the kids? My mom stayed with the kids.
We have a mate and she
was there since my daughter was
a baby. So she's
and she knows my kids very well.
She's a Chinese lady. So she helped my mother
with cleaning and cooking. My mother
take the kids to school and everything.
Whenever I'm in California, I take my kids with
me on the road on the weekends. So they actually get on stage and perform. My son and my daughter
both get on stage. They are six and four. They love the stage. They really like to be on the
stage and to talk to the microphone because they see me doing TikTok live. Yeah. There's always
a phone and they just, they are familiar with it. I talk. They love to talk and make people
laugh. And do you have any mom guilt about traveling so much? I have a lot of mom guilt. That's why I feel
like I work so hard
so I can just start doing
the big theaters
I can do two theaters a month
so I don't have to do
every week.
Like two weekends a month?
Two weekends a month
so I can spend more time with them
but you have to
pay your dues
I mean you have to
sell all the clubs
and over and over
so you can have the market
you can do theaters
I just that's why I
work every weekend
because I want to get there
in two years
not in five years
because I'll miss their childhood
yeah
I have so much mom guilt
I really do
and whenever I'm home
I can home
I
that's why like
as a mom
we don't have
a comedian life
we come home at two
we wake up at seven
you are a mom
we wake up a seven
there were many times
I just remember
so hard sometimes right
yes
yeah I I just felt like
my son
he said he got bullied in school
because people think he's slow
and it makes me so sad
because I don't have time
to help with his homework
my mom don't sleep
English. My son's so smart and I feel so bad that people think he's stupid. So that's
why I want to move to Texas because my boyfriend's mom is going to move down with us and he's
going to live with us. I'm going to try to do less shows. I'm going to find other ways to make
money to running my TV show, running my book. So I can I can have be with them because there's
nothing more than being with them is everything. They know it. I don't think there's any two
male stand-up comics, dads, probably ever cried about not spending enough time with
their kids. Yeah, I feel so guilty. Um, you know, my kids are grown now and, but still, you,
you will question, you know, choices. Did I do the right thing? Did I, but if I didn't do this,
I wouldn't be able to have gotten here. Yeah. And you, you know, you won't get that time back. But
when the opportunity is there, especially in entertainment, you can't, you know, like I remember when I wrote my book, there was a time where I'm like, oh, I would have loved to have had this book deal when I wasn't working on a TV show like Chelsea lately, which was five days a week. I would have loved to have done a little, well, the offer is not there when you're a nobody. The offer's there when you're working all week and then you have to write the book on the weekends. And maybe, you know, five o'clock, you go in the pool with your kid or whatever. And, um,
Yeah. It's just, it's so, I mean, your story is like, I got a little when we were on the boat with Dr. True, which was like this afternoon boat trip. And, but obviously I didn't get to know you. And I, but I saw your growth and I knew that you were a hard worker. And I, I was like, oh, I remember she said she, you know, had a son. And I wonder how she does. And I, and I, I was like, oh, I remember she said she, you know, you know, had a son. And I wonder how she does.
all this. And, but I knew you were a good mom. I knew, you know, and if you have to make the
sacrifice, you have to, you cannot, you cannot do everything. Yeah. Last Friday was the first time in
my baby's lives, I took them trick-or-treating. And I, I just, I don't want, I did not schedule
anything that I weekend. I just know, I have to do it. I have to, and I took them to trick-or-treating,
and then there was other kids. And then my son came to me, he was, Mom, what do I do? And I started to cry.
I said, you just go there and say, trick-or-trade, and you take one candy, you'll say, thank you.
And he said, thank you, Mom.
I never done that.
I'm so excited.
Finally, I can be like other kids.
And my daughter, she went there and she told me, she come back to tell me what people said to her.
I just, I felt so good.
I said, that's so worth it.
Yes, we do need a weekend's income.
But you know what?
I need to, they need to know how to trigger trade.
They can't be the only kid who do know that.
Like, I feel so bad.
Well, you know, this is what is so great.
great is that you can be more selective after this tour and you can turn things down and you know you'll get to a place where
that weekend or whatever is not going to make or break your bank or your change your life my dad would say
it's not going to change your lifestyle it's not one gig is not going to you know give you a jet or
whatever and you are going to have to say you know yes no or change it or whatever
And you will never regret like not doing that weekend in Dallas or whatever if there is some opportunity for you with your kids.
And so now tell me how you met your new love of your life.
I met him last year on February in Austin, Texas.
He was filming my show.
I hired his friend filming my show and they said they need two camera to capture the crowds.
So he hired him.
I remember he was so handsome and sweet
And I remember I gave all of the camera guys
A merch of mine a hat
So he took a head
It was a funny head
It said ass pro shop
With my ass on it
But A plus S pro shop
And I remember February
I first time I met him
And around June I came back to Austin
And he walked into my green room
Waring my hat
And I'm like
Hey do you want a shot
But he was
I think he had a crush on me
But he felt because he worked on my show,
he didn't want to be unprofessional.
He didn't want to ask me out.
So I said, I have to do it.
And then I remember this girl, the girl at the club, she goes,
oh my God, he's so hot.
I want to fuck him.
I'm like, he is hot.
And then my other girl's like, he's so hot.
I'm like, I want to fuck him.
You don't do that, though.
Like, you don't fuck guys on the road.
I think I'm just going to.
That's only for the male comedians.
Yeah, we actually don't do it.
We either just are like, I just want to get back to my room.
and if you have kids you want the solid night's sleep
Yes
You know
That was always the nice thing
When they were little
As I was like
I kind of love this hotel room
Like no one's waking me up at 6 a.m or whatever
Okay so go on
So I told her as no no
I can do it
I'm a communist
My pussy built on to the people
I'm gonna fuck him
I remember that I had to convince him to fuck me
Because he won't do it
He's a nice guy
I have to have guys
So we went to the four seasons in the lobby
And I said hey do you want to have a drink
He's like yeah my name is Zang
I said whatever
yeah I just look at his beautiful blue eyes and big eyelashes
I'm just like oh my god he's so handsome he's so sweet
and he didn't want to now had you dated much
between the husband and him nothing I have kind of dated some guy
like for two weeks okay not even for it's like the guy
want to marry me after two weeks like the love bombers
which I just so turned off and he's literally he just
talk about his life and I'm like yeah but do you
do you want to go upstairs he's like what do you do
do upstairs do you want to have some tea to my room
He said, okay, I said, yes
So we went upstairs
And I got in bed
I got naked in bed
I just sitting in bed
He's literally sitting on the couch
I said hi
He's like
Hi
He's like, do you want me to make some tea?
I'm naked
He's like, I see it
I'm like why you cover your face
He's like yeah you're naked
I said we're gonna have sex
He's like
Uh huh yeah
But I don't think you have a condom
I said oh
I Uber eat condom right now
I also door-dashed to condoms, which one ever come first?
I did over his condoms.
He went downstairs and he came back.
He's like, you really got condoms?
I said, yeah.
He's like, okay.
And we had sex.
And then he texts me, he's like, I'll see you again.
I was like, okay, I didn't even respond to him.
And I just never talked to him again.
I liked it.
He wanted to call me, but he didn't think I want to talk to him again
because I never stopped.
You just did a little thumbs up on the text?
little heart. Oh, a little heart.
Okay. Nothing.
Didn't respond. So he wanted to talk to me, but he realized I wasn't interested.
He also saw that probably what I do on the road. I just, fuck guys on the road.
But he was the first guy. Like, I actually had sex on the road.
I just, I met a different guy. He loved on me later. And then I remember in September,
I came back to Austin, late September, and I saw him again. He said, I want to see you, you know.
I said, I don't have time. I don't know if you are working for my show. He goes, yes,
my friend and I were working on a show. I'm like, okay, what?
whatever. So I saw him. I remembered how sweet he was. And then I remember that after that I kissed him. And he said, I wanted to ask you on a real date. I said, okay. So we went on a real date. And he didn't want to have sex. I'm like, I'm fucking you. Okay. And then we had sex. And I asked him, do you like my big tits? He's like, I'm an assman. I was like, this guy's not going to go anywhere. I mean, this guy is not going to go anywhere. He's cute. But.
Oh my God. Either he's gay or autistic. I don't know.
He's a good. I'm an ass man. I'm like, okay.
And then he just literally, I threw him out to film my show in, I think it was Canada, five cities in five days.
Very tough and he was very sweet. He didn't want to have sex with me.
He's like, I want to really date it, which means that we need to get on each other.
Like, we need to become real friends. Like, the sex is going to be so destructive.
I was so mad at him. I was so angry.
I was so pissed at him.
I'm like, you just don't want to fuck me.
You think I'm ugly.
You don't want to fuck me.
You think I'm ugly and fat.
That's what you think.
He's like, that's not it.
So he was just so different.
And he also had a corporate job before he started filming.
He worked at Tesla for five, six years.
So he just, he's a very, like, a very nice man.
He's like a nice normal guy.
He's a nice, normal sweet guy.
He didn't want to.
He actually wanted to get to know me.
I was offended.
All my friends are like, I think he may he's a nice guy.
He's not a lot by me.
He just, he wants more than having sex.
You just weren't used to that.
You weren't used to anyone being nice to you.
I know, I wasn't.
I said, you want me, just me, not without my body?
Like, you just want me?
My annoying self?
He said, yes.
I said, but I talk a lot.
He goes, I like to listen to you talk.
I'm like, what's wrong with you?
Then we, then September, December, he asked me to his girlfriend.
I said, yes, my, yeah, I asked him to spend five days in LA with me.
I said, but you're going to stay in a hotel because you can't live in my house.
I don't want you to meet my mom.
He said, but what's the real reason?
I said, yes, I'm under health arrest for my DOI.
I have anger alert.
In real?
No.
In real life, I got a DOI last year.
You did?
How did that happen?
I was drinking and I crashed in my car because I fell asleep.
I was so tired.
I did not.
Also, I have bipolar, so I haven't, I forgot to eat sometimes.
I overwork.
I overwork, I forgot to eat.
So were you coming back from a show or something?
Actually, I did a lot of shows that, that,
week and the month before and then I did a Sunday I think at the ice house so I was after
show I went to drinking with some friends and I haven't been eating for probably two weeks
just drinking no no food and then I just passed out I yeah I felt sleep in the car it was a Tesla
X I forgot to use a self-drive and my car crashed two two trees I killed two trees and then is that
when you woke up when you hit the tree oh I woke up the car was
up three times. Oh my god, but you heard? I was alive. The car was totaled, but they took me
the hospital, they scanned me. They think I definitely have some internal bleeding. It turns out
I was harmless. I had some glasses on my face, tiny little pieces. And I, I, I, the same day.
Maybe because you were past it, because they say sometimes, like, you know, if you saw like a truck
coming at you, your whole body would tense up. Like a cat. Yeah, and so then when you get hit,
the injuries are much worse. Then if you were out of it or asleep or on,
under more relaxed as you are intoxicated.
I think so. Oh my God. So then the police were at the
at the hospital? Yeah, they got my blood test and I think
I was definitely there's a lot of blood, whatever. So I
got a good attorney. So I was able to get a good deal. I got
house arrest. So then you couldn't do stand-up or you could
because that was work. I did a pop-cost too. I went on shows. I had
like that. So as long as it was work you could do it. As work, I can
have that excuse. And I had a podcast. But you weren't able to drive.
I can't drive.
I don't want to drive either.
I'm always texting anyway.
So now my man drives me around.
So the first week we are dating.
So you don't drive, but will you ever drive again if it's self-driving?
I will.
I will.
But can you legally drive right now?
Right now, no, but next year I can get my lessons back.
And was your mom mad at you for that?
No, she was so happy I was alive.
Oh, so she wasn't then mad.
No, she was actually so nice.
She goes, you know what?
You are not heard of fuck the car.
You are not heard.
But she wasn't mad that you drink?
No. She just know that I was going through a lot.
That's actually my ex.
He ended up fucking me up.
He went behind my bag.
I saw all of my stuff and my clothing, my archives, my shoes, my bags, jewelry is in China without my knowledge.
I found that out.
And I was screaming and yelling at him that earlier.
I was in a bad place.
Just you're in a horrible spot.
It was just a horrible spot.
But the first week dating as my, as his girlfriend and my boyfriend came to take me to jail.
And then he picked me.
Your DUI and do they make you go to like AA or anything?
Yes, I go to AA and I like the guys at the AA.
There's a lot of old guys at the AA class I go.
They are all like in their 70s.
Yeah.
They go there, they've been there for 30 years and I'm the only woman there.
I remember thinking that I remember somebody saying, oh, you know, the best AA is at Robertson or whatever.
This is, you know, in the 90s.
A lot of agents go there.
and I remember seriously considering going to A.A. for the stage time.
That's awesome.
Because you could get up and tell a story and, you know,
and oftentimes they, a lot of people, they tell the same story for 30 years.
They get pretty good at it.
They have punchlines.
It's like, it's a good training.
So do you speak at the meetings?
We share a little bit.
So it's like everyone share a little story.
Oh, it's not standing up in front of all the people.
So I don't do it because I don't want to, because you have those pharmacists, the assistants,
They go there, they dress up,
they're like trying to be cute and funny.
I don't want to do their spotlight.
You know, I just want them to shine.
I'm just like a mop in the corner, be like,
yep, I am a drunk ho.
I listen to them.
I just want to see them getting on stage
and they got all dolled up.
They drive.
They wear your, it's so cute.
So just tell everybody, like,
where the next spots you're going to be,
where they can find you.
The show is on Kulu.
It premieres this Saturday, November 8th.
Yes.
And I just know my juicy scoopers are going to,
Love it.
I can't wait.
And
congrats with your man.
Thank you.
And where are you guys now in your love journey?
We are getting our house in Austin.
We just got the apartment in Hollywood.
So I'm going to sell my house in Arcadia, Pasadena area.
And we're very excited to have our new life.
And he's also my tour manager.
So he produced my podcast.
He's my full-time slave.
Okay.
Which I'm so lucky to have him.
And I'm in Magubi's at Maryland next week.
I'm in Chicago and Philly and Singapore, Hawaii, Honolulu, Maui,
all over the place, San Jose.
And gaii and comedy.com.
When you go to Hawaii, can you...
I'm taking them, actually.
I'm taking my mom and kids for 10 days.
Oh, that's so...
I'm so glad you're making vacations out of it.
I remember, like, when I was doing Chelsea lately and I got a gig, like, in somewhere around Phoenix.
I said, they said, oh, you can stay.
at this hotel, whatever, and I go,
could they find me the hotel
that has the water slide?
So the kids came
and they were able to go the water slide, but then my
younger son at the time
wasn't tall enough. And so we
got up to the top and I was like, oh shit.
And I'm like trying to spike up his hair
getting up the line. And I felt like
it was like a DUI test. Like I was
like, just don't look him in the eye
and just go sit down real quick.
Before the lifeguard realizes you're too
little to go on this. And he's like,
okay okay and then the guy's like excuse me sir you know can you can you come over here and stand
and he looks at me he's like and he was so mad because his older brother could do it got out the
water slide I'm like next time you know we then we did what real fun was we I did the
atlantis casino and we went and then everyone was tall enough to go on every ride there
and we went on that water slide so it's like I was always like how I was like telling my age
like I don't know how many other comedians you have that are like just trying to
like book things around like amusement parks
and like miniature golf and bowling.
I always do San Francisco because we got the zoo
and then when my son
I remember I took my son and we went to
the Alcatraz thing when he was older
when he was like 10 or 11 that was like
such a fun tour and
San Francisco's fun. There's a lot to do
there. We always book
around now. I know you're doing New York
in December. New York in December
Gramsie Theater. We sold out two shows on Saturday.
We're going to probably add one show on Sunday.
Awesome. Hopefully we can edit that one.
Yeah. That is so great. It's so lovely meeting you. And I really loved like our heart to heart and getting to know you so well. And everybody please, what's your Instagram?
Is it J-Ying-S-S-Y-Y-Y-I-N-G? Say how you spell it. J-I-A-O-Y-I-N-G-S-U-M-M-E-R-S.
Yes. And of course, it's going to be all linked and everything in the notes of this show. And thank you so much. And just to remind you guys,
I will be, I think there's like literally a handful of tickets if you get them right now.
I'm almost sold out.
MGM Grand, November 14th, a live Juicy Scoop.
This is BravoCon Weekend, so it's a very bravo-centric juicy scoop show.
And that's all at Heather MacDonald.net.
And thank you so much.
Thank you.
This was awesome.
You're so great.
Thank you.
And you've changed your flight and everything to make this recording.
So I appreciate it because I was like, when you said your special is coming out the 8th,
I'm like, well, I really think you need to come on the show before the eight.
So people like put it in their calendar, watch it, talk about it, share it.
Thank you so much for making it happen.
I appreciate you so much.
Oh, you're adorable.
Thank you.
Thank you.
