Just Trish - Riley Reid On RETIRING From Adult Films, Being A Modern Mom & Befriending Logan Paul

Episode Date: November 9, 2023

On episode 30 of 'JUST TRISH', Trisha sits down with iconic adult entertainer Riley Reid to discuss the ups and downs of being a porn star--from WILD fan encounters to collaborating with David Dobrik and Logan Paul. Plus, Riley reveals what it's like raising a daughter in the spotlight, and why she made the decision to NEVER show her child's face on social media again. And the two bombshells talk through their past OF collaboration... and how much money they made from it!  Subscribe to the Podcast: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/just-trish/id1698564262?at=1010lSCj Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6bZ5tfeCt6naGMw24pRMLe YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@justtrishpodcast All Podcast Platforms: https://link.chtbl.com/JustTrish?at=1010lSCj Follow Just Trish on Social Media: https://www.instagram.com/justtrishpod/ Follow Oscar: https://www.instagram.com/oscargracey Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hey guys! Welcome back to Just Trish and I probably have never been more excited for this guest today. It's the one and only Riley Reid! Hi! I have the most notes on you of anyone. I think I've done like 20 note cards. Usually I have like three or four. I did 20 because everything you do and say is so fascinating. I'm so excited for you to be here. I'm so excited to be here. Thank you for having me. Oh my gosh, you're kind of everywhere, which I love. I love seeing your different energy on different podcasts because you can match energy so well with people. It's so good. Like I watched you on No Jumper, then I watched you on Whitney. And it's like two- Those are also very different versions of me. Oh, were they? Oh, right, versions. Yeah, because they were pretty close and I was like, wow, yeah.

No, like I think No Jumper is like... You had a baby. I know you were talking about your C-section on there. Oh, oh, yeah, I guess I've done a lot. Maybe it wasn't No Jumper. Yeah, I've done a lot of the No Jumper ones. Yeah, it was just Adam by himself. I don't know if that's No Jumper or... Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yeah, you're right.

You were like in sweatpants. I was like, I've done so many, I forget it. You are like the podcast queen. Like, you're on so many. And you always have been. Like, I think you're like the OG, like, porn star on the podcast. Yeah. Because you were like on Impulsive. Thatulsive that was like went put impulsive on the map like i never watched it before you were on there oh yeah and like your moments are like

every podcast you do it's like there's some like riley reed moment yeah no i mean i was like stoked to start doing podcasts because i was tired of like people's idea of me and porn because i play this character and so like i was like I am more than just this one character that you see playing reading a script and following her lines for the the day yeah so it's like I wanted a pod I wanted to start doing and being given the opportunity I was like oh hell yeah like this gives me a voice and your personality and all of that because like I feel like especially as a girl like you watch girls when I was younger I'd watch you and I'd be like oh it's like a porn star like you were in David's vlogs a lot like right before I got in there and I remember being like so like what's the

word I guess maybe jealous or just maybe insecure because I was like oh man they're shooting with Riley like I feel so insecure and yeah so seeing your personality I'm like oh no you're like not as intimidating you know no I think I'm pretty normal yeah you hear like porn star or anything like oh my gosh like so I remember the first time I met you I was so intimidated I still am intimidated oh I was so intimidated you're intimidating not at all oh my god when we did when we did OF I remember thinking I only did it with two girls you and Lena which is like literally the MVP it's like recording a song with Brittany and Christina and I was just like oh my god it was the most nerve wracking thing ever. I had so much fun that day. We had such a, we did the power puff girls. Those were fun. Those were so much fun. Cause costumes. And what

was fun about that is cause I never did like porn sets or anything. I always wanted to, but I always thought like there wasn't a place for like chubby chicks and porn. I now know there is, but I always, I just thought those were fun. Cause it was literally just us and like a tripod, which is like casual. Yeah. I loved it as it as well and like that was the era of like the different like identity claim of porn and women being in control of their bodies and the type of content they shoot and and who they're shooting with so it was like really fun for me to also shoot with you and expand myself outside of just like the girls I get booked with. And I was like, no, like she's cute. I want to shoot with her. Lena has talked very highly of her. So she sounds like she has a great personality. So I was like, let's, let's have sex and make

money while we do it. No, that was, that was huge. That I always talk about my three months doing porn being the best months ever because I made money. I was able to buy a house. I was like, this is the best decision ever. Beautiful house. Thank you. I never could save money before that. And then quarantine happened and I couldn't do anything house. I was like, this is the best decision ever. You have a beautiful house. Thank you. I never could save money before that. And then quarantine happened and I couldn't do anything. And I was like, this is the best thing ever. And then I met my husband like three months later and I was like, oh man, okay, I'll let me just like retire from my work career. But it was fun. I had fun. I liked doing it with girls. I did it. I had a couple guys and I'm just like, the girls were funner for sure. Oh yeah. It's always so much more fun with the ladies. They're just like fun. It's like a slumber party with. Yes. Like it's so fun. That's exactly how I would describe it. And then costumes and glam. Yeah. It's just girly vibes. When did you transition to OF? Pretty much like around COVID time. So OF has been around for a long time. Like I've heard of girls using OF and actually was trying to recruit me into OF, but like

that was like maybe like 2016, 17 or something like that. And like at that time I had like my own website. So I like developed my own website and had my own thing. It was like Riley read.com, read my lips.com. And like, um, that was what you did back in the day. You have like your porn sites, memberships, right? Yeah. You have your membership websites and OF waships, right? Yeah, you have your membership websites.

And OF was around, but like not many people knew about it. And I wasn't really until like, I think like the Snapchat game. You remember how like it was like everyone had private Snapchat? I did that too, through Patreon. Yeah. So like shortly after the private Snapchat and it started to die out, OnlyFans is what started to, like, pick up when the private Snapchat was dying. And then quarantine happened and everything. And I think it just being, like, this central hub of, like, a Twitter.

It's, like, the same website link and you just add your little girl's name at the end. Right. And so it just makes it so it's, like, a hub for everyone to be on. And it makes it, like, I think, like, on. And it makes it like, I think like where users feel safe, their, their payments are already on there. It just makes it so accessible. Yeah. And so like,

I felt really sad that I didn't join earlier because I had my own other separate membership sites and I wish I would have taken advantage of that. But now I've, I think I've been on it. I started in 2017, but I didn't start officially posting until like 2019. Oh, wow. Okay. So before quarantine, you were on there. Yeah.

But not like really on it. Cause I had my other site. So what, do you still have the other site now? Yeah. Okay. So you do both and you do memberships to both. Yeah. I mean, it's just basically the same content released on different like scheduled platforms

and whatnot, but yeah. You're so smart. I just have it kind of everywhere because every every user is different. And like you have to think like you have people who are older on a different type of platform, younger who on this new age platform and everything. So you kind of want to like reach your different demographics. Right. That's true. I didn't think about that because I feel like membership sites are like not a thing. But I guess people who are older probably are like just accustomed to it. Yeah, people are. Exactly. And you have to it. Yeah. People are.

Exactly. And you have like fetish people. So you may want to put your content on like a fetish site for any of like your fetish type stuff because then those people will see you. Do you do like paid for clips? Have you done those? Those like clip for sale? I've done those like years ago.

Yeah. I remember those are like a big thing too. Yeah. Do you still make content or you just sell old content now? No, I still make content. Wow. How is that since like becoming a mom? Um, well it's been different and like I actually missed shooting content the way I used to. And so like now because I'm a mom, my schedule availability

is like so much more slim. And like when I used to shoot, I'd be doing like 16 hour days like onset because I'm like building a set and I'm shooting like this whole like themed thing with the script and a concept and everything. And so now it's kind of just like basic iPhone. I don't, I'm not really hiring like a camera crew anymore. We're not, I'm not hiring like a PA with like setting up lets lights and sound and stuff. So like, I kind of want to get back into that because I miss being able to be like super creative in that regard. And so like, I'm wanting that, but right now I've just kind of like, I'm doing like, I have an agency, I have Ash agency. So like now when I'm shooting, it's like just shooting to help promote the girls. And a lot of it is like iPhone content. Cause I'm

promoting them on like Instagram and stuff like that. Can you, do you not get any trouble on Instagram? Cause I've got three of my Instagram. I was just deleted the other day and I got it back. Thank God. I never was able to get my back up. Cause I used all my church of paid us accounts. Like they just kept deleting it and I would not even do anything crazy. I was like, honestly, I don't know. I don't know the Instagram game. I don't like, I don't know. I wish I did. I'm like haters over there. I always say that like someone's wife there is pissed that their husband loves me. And I'm really sorry. He's getting deleted.

I'm sorry. I don't know what it is. Like, I don't know. Because I think I do follow different ones. I think I'm like Let Riley Live is one. But then there's – didn't you have like Hello? Yeah, I have Hello Riley Reid. That's like my backup one because I had that one for like maybe six to nine months

while I was trying to get my Riley. What I did is I sent an appeal letter every day. No way. I had it copy and pasted, sent it every day for six months, and then I finally got my account back. Just an Instagram email? Just like a support email? Yeah, the support email.

Yeah. I harassed the shit out of those people. Oh, man. Persistence is key. I need to do that i want my original trisha payne is back just copy and paste you just copy save it in your notes and you just send that same email every day wow oh my god you did it yourself you just didn't patience to do that i don't i have my assistant do it but it was just like one of her daily tasks

or it just takes like five minutes and six months later I got it back so it was worth it wow and then you said you just got deleted again and you got it back yeah I was deleted for a day and then I got it back thank god that's crazy yeah because even if you try to promote like link tree or your ex account like they just are like they take it away I'm just like I just gave up yeah I don't really promote much there anymore I kind of like just try to promote the other girls and stuff like their Instagram and stuff like that so that they can try to figure out a way to like build themselves. Obviously, like I post the photos on OnlyFans. I post it on Twitter and Instagram. But yeah, those help a lot. I mean, when you when you post, it's crazy. I remember our collaboration. I was

like, wow, I got so many. And it's insane. Like you think you collab. I collab with so many social media people and you get followers, but nothing compared to like collabing with you on there. All your girls must be making bank. I feel very lucky. social media people and you get followers, but nothing compared to like collabing with you on there. So all your girls must be making bank. Yeah. I feel very lucky. Thank you to all my fans. You guys support me so good.

And I feel very honored that when I'm like, go follow her because I usually generally mean it. Yeah. And my fans are like, yeah, we want to follow her because we like Riley's friends. Like we support the community. I love that. I love that you have a community. It really is. Like people who just love you and trust you.

Yeah. That's, like, hard to build, especially in that world where people— I don't know how it happened. It just happened. I think you just have that personality, and it really is. I think it helped. I did a lot of AVN conventions, going to Vegas and meeting the fans. Like, in person.

Yeah, in person. Before 14. Yeah. Like, there's some I know by name. I don't know if Walter, if you're going to watch this. Hi, Walter. I remember you, Walter. Wow, that's amazing.

And the fact that you can remember all them. Oh, because Walter, like, I know some of them by their face. Like, I've seen them for the last 10 years. Really? I know who they are. How long have you done this for, like adult work? Since I was 19. And you're?

And I'm 32. Wow. Oh, my gosh. Do you think you'll ever retire? You think you'll do it forever? Uh, I think I'm going to retire at some point. You won't be like mil for doing it or anything? 40 year old, 50? Uh, probably not. No. Just cause also like a new genre. I mean, it's not that I don't want to do it. I just feel like I want to busy myself with other things and I've already started busying myself with other things that it's like, it's not necessarily, that's like what I'm as passionate about. Like, I think I would love to

like direct girls and stuff like that and things like, and I am becoming more so like insecure in front of the camera. I'm getting older and stuff like that. Yeah. Cause you still look like you could never be a milf because you still look like a child. Like you still look so young, you know? Yeah. They always say you're a boob job away from being a milf. Yeah. I guess like your body alone gives you just like young energy, which is kind of in right now. Like I'm trying to get my implants out because I feel like now it's better to just not, the implant look is like so 2007, like no one likes them anymore. I don't know. I think people still like them, but maybe it's just you becoming a new version of yourself. And maybe I'm just like, I don't think I need these giant implants anymore, you know? It was, like, definitely the thing, but.

I mean, they look great. No, they're, like, saggy. I love big titties. Do you? But that's probably because I have nothing, so it's, like, when I'm looking up stuff or pictures of girls, I always look up big, giant boobs. Wait, really? Yeah. How funny.

I feel like most guys I talk to now, they like just a smaller chest. Like, every guy I've, like, talked to is a, like, not every guy I've like talked to is like not recently married, but like before that. I don't know because a lot of times, even when I was shooting adult videos, I was like, people may say they like small boobs, but they don't touch them. Okay. Like girls or guys. But like we're usually guys. Really?

But typically both. Like maybe they don't know what to do with them because they squeeze big ones. They squeeze them. And I'm like, I know what to do with them. Because they squeeze big ones. They squeeze them. Yeah, exactly. I know what to do with them. You know? So it's like, I just feel like when you have natural or just bigger boobs in general, natural or not, like people are, they gravitate towards them.

When they're small, you don't gravitate as much. You just gravitate down to the nether regions. That's true, I guess. Which is kind of worse. I like it better down there anyways. Up here, I like some foreplay right a little bit yeah when you go straight to the action i'm like wait wait yeah where's the intro scene i need a little dialogue oh my god do you actually like in your personal life do you like a little i mean i do love dialogue do you you talk i'm like we never talk. We're so silent.

I mean, we do talk, but I can't talk too much because then it just happens too quickly. Oh, really? Like role play

or like dirty talk? Just both. Oh my gosh, that's so funny. You say like, okay, I'll be quiet for a minute. Sometimes it's like,

okay. Wow, because you're so good and you're like, because you've done it for so long as a professional, it's just like, you're so good at it. Like, it's.

I don't know. I don't know if there's kinks in it as well. Like, I don't know. Maybe because I'm American. My husband's not. Like, I don't know if there's anything like that. Well, that's like a kink. I know for me to him.

I love like a foreign accent. Like, I love it. Like, we watch Nine Day Fiance. And I always have. I'm like, let's pretend I'm getting off the plane and you're meeting me for the first time. Like, I love that. That's right.

He's from Latvia, right? Yeah. Where is that? It's like right next to like Lithuania area. It's like, it's bordered with Russia-ish. Like it's kind of like, it used to be a part of the USSR. Oh, okay. Yeah.

Because Pasha sounds kind of Russian a little bit. Yeah. He speaks Russian. Oh, okay. Is that what they speak in Latvia? Yeah. Well, they speak Latvian. No way.

But it used to be a part of the USSR where they spoke Russian, and then in 1992 it became Latvia, and now they try to do all the whole Latvian traditions. You're so smart. You know the whole history of it. My daughter's Latvian. I have to learn. Yeah, are you learning Russian? Da. Oh, my gosh.

That's so cool. My name is Ashley. Oh, my gosh. That's amazing. What else doyasevut Ashley. Oh my gosh, that's amazing. What else do you know? I love foreign languages. I know slushi me niyasechas suka. It means listen to me right now, bitch. Oh, it sounds sexy the way you said it.

I know yanisnayu, yanipanimayu. I know a little bit, but I can say like some basic stuff with my daughter where we say like smitri for like look or sadis for sit. Oh my God. Do you speak to that? Yeah. He speaks to her. Yeah.

Oh my God. So cute. I love, I love foreign languages just in general. I just think they're so cool. And because I'm American too, I'm kind of like, I feel like I have no culture. I'm from like the Midwest, so I have no culture or nothing. So I like gravity control. You have Midwest culture, girl.

What is Midwest culture? What are you talking about? Like Doritos. I feel like American culture is what everyone loves. Really? Yes, of course. What's exciting about Americans? We're Americans.

Yeah, I get it. I don't know. I feel like it's just one Hollywood. So the Hollywood movie scope and everything is just always usually sent in the American society. And it's like following, like when you're watching like high school things, it's like a lot of times when I'm watching the high school movies, I'm like, my high school was kind of like that. Really? Like, yeah. Where'd you grow up? Florida. Oh, wow. Well, that's a whole other culture into itself. So you had that cool experience of high school. We didn't have cool high schools like in the movies.

I'm like, but they do like it. Interesting. What part of Florida? I'm from South Florida. I was born in Miami. I grew up in like Fort Lauderdale. No, so you were with all the action. You have excitement in you because that's like fun and exciting.

Yeah. Yeah. But I feel like you're right. Like when you meet someone from outside the country, they get like excited about America. And I was like, I should be more excited about it. Would you go live in Latvia? Probably not. Never?

I've never been, but I don't know if I would live there. But also like I don't speak the language and I would feel so out of place. And it would be like really difficult to acclimate to that. But yeah. And I don't know if I could do it work wise. I'm like such a busy working person. So like I feel like I would I wouldn't be able to thrive out there. Yeah.

I also think it's like, it's illegal in some countries to like do, I know we went to the Maldives and they said it was like illegal to have like an only, like an OF over there. I was like really scared. Cause you know, like the haters are trying to like report me. It's like a Muslim country or something. And like, they don't allow like any adult actors over there or something. I don't know. I was like so scared.

Cause people trying to report me and they could like go to prison for like life if you do anything. Oh my gosh. That's really scary. I know. So I was like, oh, don't even take a nude photo of me or anything because I was so scared to get arrested. But I know, but I guess like Europeans more like forward.

Yeah. I don't think that they would mind about shooting adult content there, but I just don't know if I would be able to do it just because like like it's just so far away and different and foreign. And like I've lived in Florida to like Miami to California, L.A. Yeah. Like I've not left Florida basically. Right. It's tropical, sunny weather.

Yeah. I've seen snow once in my entire life. Where were you? Where did you see it? That's when I was feature dancing. I think I was in like Pittsburgh. Wow. Yeah.

So it was like when I was dancing at strip clubs and stuff. Yeah. Oh my gosh. That's crazy. How long has Pasha been over here for? Right before COVID he came. Okay. And so he's kind of lived all throughout like the world.

He lived in China at one point, Thailand, Bali. Oh, wow. Because he does like parkour? Yeah, he does parkour. Is that how you would describe it? Because I see him do the flips. I'm like,. Because he does like parkour? Yeah, he does parkour. Is that how you would describe it? Because I see him do the flips. I'm like, I don't know what that is. Yeah, he does parkour.

He also does stunt work in movies and stuff. So he's about to be in a movie. Well, he'll be gone for two months. That's crazy. Are you going to go visit? Are you going to stay here? Because you have to work too. Probably not.

Because like, I don't want to go on a plane with a baby by myself. I'm like, if I'm going to do that, my husband is going to be sitting right next to me. No, for sure. How people do it by themselves or with two babies, I'm like, even going out of the house by myself with my baby, I just get scared. I'm like, what if someone kidnaps us or something? I have not left the house alone with her. I've been taking her alone in the car.

Me neither. And people are like, oh, Trisha never leaves without Moses. I'm like, yeah, because people are weird out there. I'm not going with my baby to the grocery store. They're going to snatch her or something. It's just, like, a scary world. That's smart. It's smart. And to go on a plane, especially overseas, it would be.

Yeah. And to a country that I don't speak the language or read it, I would be like, Emma, do you understand any of this? She might, because kids pick it up, you know? Yeah, she knows some. Yeah. I would be like, Emma, can you talk to the air stewardess for me? That'd be wild. She'd just start speaking.

Two-year-old baby giving me directions. She could be. She could be. The babies who know two languages turn out to be super geniuses, like super smart. Oh, yeah. My goal is four languages with her. No. What other languages?

She's doing Spanish and sign language. Who's teaching her sign language? I'm doing the sign language. And I don't speak it fluently or anything. Right. But I'm learning. Every day I'm teaching myself sign language. And I don't speak it fluently or anything. Right. But I'm learning. Every day I'm teaching myself at least like 10 new words a day. No way.

And so I'm teaching her that. And then her nanny speaks only Spanish. That's amazing. Even to us. She doesn't speak English. Oh my God. That's cool. So you learn it then.

No. No? I want to learn Spanish so bad. It's such a cool language. I would love to. But I'd rather learn Russian. Yeah, because then you can speak it with his family and stuff like that. Do they come over and visit?

They have a couple of times. And then you can speak. And that's why I wanted to learn it. I did like a Ulpan, like a Hebrew class this summer. And like no one speaks Hebrew. It's like the smallest country ever. But it's like I wanted to learn it, you know, just to like speak with his family and stuff. Is Malibu going to?

Yeah. She listens to like all her cartoons in the morning with Hebrew and stuff. Like she'll probably learn it better than me. She speaks to his family in Hebrew, which is cool because I never again, I never learned two languages. I have to say I'm obsessed with your guys' TikToks of her singing. I am like...

It's so cute. It's my dream. I was like, I need to come over and see her go... I was like, she's a singer! I don't know if that's normal. My baby does not do that like, she's a singer. Because I don't know if that's normal. My baby does not do that. Really? No, your baby is a singer.

Okay, good. No, your baby is a singer. Because Emma will sing, but your baby sings. Really? Okay, good. That's my dream. I was just like, I love singing.

No, your baby's a singer. You got it. She sings all the time. Manifested it. Yeah, no, for real. When I was pregnant with her, I sing all the time anyways around the house. I'm not a good singer, but I sing all the time. And was when i was pregnant with her i sing all the time anyways around the house i'm not a good singer but i sing all the time and then when i

was pregnant i sing a lot so when she came out she just started singing and i was like oh my gosh are you singing yeah she like harmonizes better than me she like mashed my teeth yeah it's incredible i was like i i watch it every once in a while because i was like it brings me joy i was like look at this cute little baby singing it's's so cool. That's so neat to hear. I love that. I know we should have a play date because your daughter, how old is she? She's 14 months? 16 months almost. So you had her in July? June 7th. Oh, and did you just post like way late? Like you posted? Yeah, we waited a couple of months before we like made the announcement because I don't know, crazy shit happens. And I was like, I don't want to post. And then some really sad and horrible dramatic thing happens. And I was like, I don't want to post. And then some

really sad and horrible, dramatic thing happens. And so we wanted, and we didn't want to like any bad energy. Cause like I was pregnant before we told my friends and family, and then like I had a miscarriage and stuff. And so like, I was just like, I need to like be careful on like how I share this energy and how, and I know my audience, I know my line of work. I know that people were going to be sending a lot of bad energy. So I was like, I'm not going to like, wait, I'm going to wait to share this for a couple of months until like we have like a family dynamic established and we're happy and we're healthy. And like, I think she was maybe like three months old when we made the announcement. Cause yeah, you waited also to

announce your pregnancy. It was like a month before you gave birth, right? I think I pretty much announced it at the same time. I was like, Hey, I was pregnant and I had my baby. That's what was so shocking. Cause I hadn't like, you hadn't posted a lot. Like you had just gotten married like what year before it was like, did you get pregnant right away or were you pregnant when you got married? We got married in June, and then I got pregnant in, like, end of September, October. Okay, so it was really fast. Because I remember that. I was like, you got married, and then all of a sudden it was like, I didn't really, like, you know, you were living your married life.

And then I was like, oh, I'm pregnant. And you had, like, a big belly. And I was like, oh, my gosh. Like, that's crazy. So why did you wait just for the same reason? Yeah, because I had a miscarriage before. So I was just like, I want to like just keep it private and everything. So then you had to tell everybody.

Yeah. I mean, we kept it like we told like our friends and stuff like that. And like a couple of girls I told here and there. And those who I saw that were pregnant, I was like, hey, I'm also pregnant. Yeah. That's so exciting when you're pregnant at the same time as someone else. Yeah. It's so much fun because then you're just like, okay, we're all pregnant at the same time.

It was. I didn't get much of that, sadly, but it was okay. Yeah, because you were – well, I mean, you just played it smart because it is a weird thing. And I saw your TikTok. Just protecting your energy, you know? Especially when I was pregnant, too. Same thing. I just stayed away from everything.

I'm like, I'm just going to, like, be at peace with this. Because people are mean. I saw your TikTok where you were like, you know, if you guys are making fun of a baby, like it's a baby. And they do. It's like my daughter had a birthmark. And like the first thing they said was like, oh, she didn't get a perfect baby. And she has this one.

Like people are psychotic. People are just mean and like vicious. And so like now I just don't even post her face. I like archived all of the photos of her face and stuff like that because I was like, you know what? Like a lot of people are just like really mean and like not kind and whatnot and like I don't want to like bring her up and like these people just not being nice to her and stuff so it's like we like show her but like just like not her face to protect like her and her own personal identity

because I was like all like sadly like most of my fans just are not as nice as I would like them to be. That's so crazy. And they're your fans, not like haters. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I don't, I guess that's where I get torn. Cause it's like, I just want to show her.

Cause they're a fan of me being an adult performer. Right. And so they're always so like, keep your mom life separate. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Interesting. And I'm just like, why, like, why can't I just be myself as well as like my Instagram isn't my adult site. Right. My daughter is not on my adult site. Yeah.

And she's not anywhere on my Twitter because my Twitter is an adult website. So she's like never on my Twitter. But like Instagram, I was like, that's like. The Hot Honey McCrispy is so back at McDonald's with juicy juicy 100% Canadian-raised seasoned chicken, shredded lettuce, crispy jalapenos, and that completely craveable hot honey sauce, it's a sweet heat repeat you don't want to miss. Get your hot honey McCrispy today. Available for a limited time only at McDonald's. The white chocolate macadamia cream cold brew from Starbucks is made just the way you like it.

Handcrafted cold foam topped with toasted cookie crumble. It's a sweet summer twist on iced coffee. Your cold brew is ready at Starbucks. Why can the Kim Kardashians, why can they post like hot bikini photos and then like family photos? Like I should be able to do the same thing. Yeah, the double standard is real because they'll be in bikinis with each other. You know, the Kardashians then like you post the kids and they get like praised for it. It's a double standard. And I think just in general, like adult performers in general, just get that stigma. Even if they're just people on OF,

just casual or full-time porn stars, it's just anything. In general too, for me, I don't even post or I don't advertise my OF, but like people still come for me for having one period because it's still runs and stuff like that. It's just such a weird thing. I'm less like, why can't you do both? Especially like you said, you keep it separate. It's not like, I don't know. Yeah. And it's like, especially it's like the way I am with my daughter, the way I present myself with her. It's like, I'm always like dressed very good. You know, I'm not like being like this hoochie mama in front of my daughter or whatever. And so it's just like, I don't know.

I just don't love how people just have such closed-minded approaches. And they like, they assume that just because you look a certain way and you dress a certain way that you should. And now you have a child that you should behave completely different. And it's like, why can I not just like be myself when I know that she's exposed to like healthy things. Like she's not exposed to dangerous activities or things. Yeah. And what are you supposed to do? Like not work? Like you're going to quit your job and stuff like that just because she has like a great life. I saw her birthday party and it's like she has to have all these great things in life and stuff like that. People are just, they can't separate the two and it's just such a different, especially the way you do it. You're so professional with your work. Like it's, you really are. You like show up. It's

like this, it's not like just, you know. Yeah. I take my job really seriously. I'm like, I definitely take the ability to like grow and expand my opportunities and stuff. So it's like, I have this like marketing agency. I don't know if many people know about it or whatever, because people think that I just do like adult entertainment and stuff like that. Like there's like other things where I like, now I have like a tech team where we like built this uh fan scout it's like a trip advisor for only fans and now we have like this like ai website that's about to come out clona where you can talk to like ai riley and no that's not gonna be a part of the launch and you can talk to ai lena and so it's like people don't know that like

i'm also like developing all these other things they don't want to see it they don't want to they don't want to see me in the computer typing until like 2 a.m working and doing all these things are you hands on with it with the tech stuff too I mean like not with like development but like with like teaching the AI and like training the AI and like working with it and you know testing you know certain things like I was like we need to make sure the AI doesn't encourage like self-harm because like I know some guys want to stick things in their penis holes but I was like my AI is not going to encourage any weird sexual mutilations oh my god I didn't even think about that yeah because you guys are so that yeah well and beyond that they want to like have you be skeleton or something like that they want

it's crazy I didn't think so you can train it not to do certain things. Yeah. Interesting. And certain things, like, we're having to train it because it was, like, saying that one of my dog's name was Max. And I was like, nope, my dog is not named Max. And I was like, look at this AI with its American stereotype saying that I have a dog named Max. How did that even come up? It just, like, creates it?

I don't know. Because you're, like, American and cute. I guess. I was thinking AI's got some stereotypes. Oh, my God. got some stereotypes oh my god that's what's scary about ai like i love it but i see it and i'm like oh my god this looks so intense like definitely really interesting and it's it's like when we're training it i'm like asking it's like what's my address you know like what and what does it reply oh it's like i don't share this type of personal information okay i'm like okay okay that's so are you is it like sexual or just it's like, I don't share this type of personal information. Okay. I'm like, okay, okay.

So are you, is it like sexual or is it like anybody, like friendship? The goal is for it to be companionship of all types. You know, we do obviously like are leading in sexual because I'm an adult star. But like our goal is to be able to bring on like mainstream people who where it's just like a companionship factor. And then they're just getting some sort of like residual income. So like so like you know it's kind of the concept is also kind of like like my fleshlight i have a fleshlight i molded once right now i make residual sales for the rest of my life so we're trying to like expand opportunities for our content creators as well as like we want to keep up with the times ai technology technology is happening. AI porn is happening.

So it's like. AI porn. It's going to be a thing. Like, they can't feel yet, though. Like, you're fleshlighting AI. No, but I mean, like, when you're watching a video, like, you're not going to have to hire two actresses to shoot the scene. Like, it's going to come. Oh, my gosh.

So it's like we need to try to be ahead of the curve. That's crazy. And we want to be able to be a part of it. And like there's the only way to do it is to join. And so we're hoping that we being on early on can help pave this path of like companionship in AI. Wow. Where's it going to live on? Well, it's on a website called klona.com.

Klona. Is it yours or is it part of someone else's? So I'm one of the owners of the company. Wow. So how many, okay. So you have Ash agency of klona. You have your 18 plus clothing. You're on OF. You have your website. I have a production company. Oh my gosh. What's your production company called? Uh, it's just a bacon booty LLC, but we're doing the transition to, uh, natural bodies. Uh, I like that. Was it bacon booty? Yeah. Bacon booty. You call like your bank and they're like, what's the name of your business?

Yep, Bacon Booty LLC. Do they ask what you do? Yes, all the time. Yeah, and I'm like, that's so personal. Do you tell them? No, I always tell them that I work in, like, some bacon spoof company because I don't want them to ever know that I do porn and the bank calls it random drama. There's a lot of money in there.

I'm, like, a platinum member. That's a lot of money in there. I'm like a platinum member. That's all they have to see. Yeah. They're probably like, wow, bacon is really good. Bacon parody industry. Yeah, exactly. Like, oh, wow. That's crazy. Where did you come up with, how do you have this entrepreneurial spirit? Is it in your family or is it just like you? It was honestly, I think a lot of it is spitefully driven. Interesting. And so I am a very spitefully driven woman and it's given me a lot of success in life. Wow. The spite did it.

Yeah. Spite did it. In a way that's good, right? Like it drives you. I think so. It's definitely not good, but it's also, it's a driving force within me. So like different things were like, I got into the adult industry. I had a boyfriend at the time and he like helped kind of

like build my career with me. And he, he's like a, he's a predominant figure in the industry. And so he was like, let's make a website together. And so I was like, sure, that sounds so fun. And he was like, let's do this. And we're going to shoot these scenes and we're splitting the proceeds here and here. And then like, as I started to shoot more content and like, I wanted to become more involved and I started to realize how I can become creative. I started learning how sets run and everything through experience. And I was like, Oh, like, can we change like the, and I started to have an identity. I was like, can we change the design of the website to look more like what I wanted to look like? And can we like do all these things? And then like our relationship started to

fall apart. And he kind of just like he took riley reed.com and owned it and he was he would not give it to me oh my gosh he wouldn't give it to me and he was trying to get me to pay him like seven thousand dollars for it early on this is like before you did anything this was no i've already started porn at this time he was in the industry that's how i met him and everything and and i remember being like so upset because like, I didn't ever ask him to do the website for me or anything. He, he was like, do you want to do a website? And I was like, yeah, let's do it. And so he just totally took advantage of me and it made me really, really sad and really gross. And he wouldn't give me Riley read.com. Did you pay him? No. I was like, you mother.

I don't need you. I don't need my name, RileyReed.com. I was like, I'm ReadMyLips.com. And I went publicly on social media and I was like, I do not own this website. Do not support this website. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Because I was livid that he was trying to take that from me and then keep it where he was like, he's like, you can just keep giving me the content and I'll just like upload it so that I'm splitting the 50-50 proceeds.

With him, he was getting, oh, ew. Yeah, it was really not nice. And it was really, really gross. And, and I was at that point of my career where I was like, I need to start claiming ownership and making residual incomes because all these companies are making money off of me. So like, I need to have a website where I own my content and I, and I have content that I own since 2015. I've been shooting content for years. So I have so much content. And so he drove me to, and I was like, at that point I was kind of like all the porn people. So I like found like a third party, like payment processor. I found like a way to develop my

website. I like, I use all these other, like my, my streaming broadcasting was actually like a sports streaming broadcasting that I integrated onto my website because it wasn't like a porn thing. But I was like, I'm not using porn because porn takes such high percentages because of that before OnlyFans and all that stuff. Your website was taking at least like 60% of your money and the girls making 40% because the studio would take everything. And so I was like, I'm doing my website and I'm going to find ways to make the costs less. And like I found all these other little small websites and they were like excited to work with me. So it worked out.

And then eventually I grew and I found my way. But yeah, I was driven because some mother wanted to keep my shit and try to make money off me. And I was like, no, sir, you are not going to. Good for you. That's amazing. Cause it's so hard when you feel like defeated when someone does that to you. And he was a powerful force in the industry as well. And like, and I'm not a programmer. Like my dad taught me the most basic programming and everything. So it's like, I don't know that stuff. And I was like, you know what? I have to learn and I have to teach myself how to do this stuff so that I can succeed in life.

And it's so hard. Like, tech stuff. Even streaming. It was hard. Streaming is so hard to get on, like, any website. It's expensive. It's hard. It's all of that.

Trying to build on, like, WordPress, even being template-based and everything is fucking hard. Yeah. I don't know how you came up with that. I mean, that's, like, I don't know any other girl. I still want to know. Spite drove me. And honestly, like, I even remember, like, my brain, like, when I was learning all of this mean, that's like, I don't know any other girl. I still want to know. Spite drove me. And honestly, like, I even remember, like, my brain, like, when I was learning all this stuff, I was like, I could feel my brain growing. I was like, I love all this spiteful motivation.

That's smart. That's also just intellect. Like, not anyone can do that. Like, to learn to teach yourself is so difficult. Yeah. That's crazy. You said your dad was a programmer? Yeah.

So you kind of knew a little bit with him. He's super tech savvy. So, I knew that it was capable. Right. And rather than I was able to do it or not, I was like, it can be done. So like I need to figure this shit out. Yeah. Did he ever help you with it at all? Like your site? No. Oh my God. No. Does he know what you do? Yeah. He knows. I would never ask him. I'm doing that. Well, you can just be like, you know, you have to show him what you're streaming. I just need help getting something streaming. And so having the conversation, I don't have to show them what you're streaming. Like, I just need help getting something streaming. And so having the conversation, I don't think my dad, my dad's never asked me, but I feel

like he probably found out somewhere. Because people would like, people are weird. They would send like my nudes to like, they'll find his phone number and send it to them. I know, they, I don't, why do people do that? I don't know. I'm like, you guys are like a freak. They'll do it to my random people that I don't even know. I'm just like, you guys are so sick.

It's weird. Yeah. So they get like, my family will get random like nudes of me. Or they'll do it on like X too. They like send random nudes. And I'm'm just like people are just so messed up. Like what's the point? And with X now too, I feel like everything's just like a free for all in there. So people can just go harass people with my nudes and weird shit.

Do we not call it Twitter anymore? I don't know. I've been trying to transition. God damn it. X is kind of like hot though. It's kind of like porn. It's kind of like X. I mean, yeah, it is hot, but it's like I, it's just in my ingrain.

I know. How are we going to like rebrand? I think it'll happen. it's like, I, it's just in my ingrain. I know. How are we going to like rebrand? I think it'll happen. It's like Facebook being meta. People. Who calls Facebook meta? Yeah. Right.

Isn't that it? It's now meta. Yeah. Do you go to meta.com or you go to Facebook.com? Meta.com. Oh, but they call it meta, right? Okay. That's how I feel. That's how my head says it that'd be like one day if you just rebrand completely to ashley yeah but i was like okay i'm ashley i love it i actually did not know you i

knew you had a real name i didn't know your real name until i watched you like yesterday on all these podcasts and i think it was on uh adams where you're like i'm ashley like you call me riley and i'm like oh my god i didn't even think about that. Well, yeah, because Adam signed my baby shower card Riley. And I was like, Adam, this is not appropriate. That's so funny. Maybe he doesn't know. Because I think to me, you're like, because Riley also sounds like a real name. It sounds like your real name, you know?

So, but Ashley. I think I carry, it fits me as well. Totally. No, it's such a cute name. I love the name. But I love the name Ashley too. Yeah, thank you. It's so cute.

And Ash Agency is like catchy and cute. So is that like, as Ash agency, like how do you just, you help promote girls? Is that the main thing? What's the other draw of it? Uh, so we're like, we're like, we try to do like brand deals and like help like with marketing and PR and like building the brands as well as like management for any of like their content sites or helping them get like sex toy brand deals and podcasts or things like that. We kind of just like help them in their career overall and help to like build them more and like show them that they should have streams of revenue in multiple different places as well and try to help encourage that. So you kind of manage. Yeah. Kind of. Yeah.

Yeah. To like help them with those. Yeah. Yeah. We kind of just like, yeah, you kind of manage. Yeah. Kind of. Yeah. To like help them with those kind of things. Yeah. Yeah. We kind of just like, yeah, kind of like manage. We just present it. We, and they just choose what they want to do and whatnot. That's amazing. That's such a cool, that's such a cool like pivot for you. It's like insane. And then the clothing line, 18 plus is also like. Yeah. That was super weird and different. Like it's out of my field. Where did it come from? Because starting clothing is so hard. I honestly wish I didn't start it. Wait, why? Just because it is so hard. So difficult, the manufacturing and. Yeah, it's really hard. The like, we, it took us like over two years for, and we did it during COVID. So it

really delayed like the productivity of it. And so like that was really hard. And then it's just like a really hard industry to get into. So I feel like that's where I was like, and it's, I guess not as something I'm as passionate about. And so like, I think I'm passionate in like other directions and whatnot. And so that's been a little bit tricky of me trying to figure out like what to do with the clothing line and whatnot. I really love it. I really, yeah, it's super cute. I really enjoyed it. It's something different. I feel like it's like an opportunity for me to like show that I can do more. And so I feel like I just need to figure out like how I can bring more to it. I don't know much about clothing. I could tell you all about videos and content. Yeah. So I think like clothing,

I kind of threw myself in without enough experience. And so. And do you do it all yourself or did you have someone help you? I had hired designers, but like I designed it and stuff like that. So you had to hire the designers and manufacturers. Did they know them? Did you have to find, because that's what's so hard for us. We've tried three different clothing lines and failed because it's hard to find that

stuff. Yeah. I found, I found some pretty good ones that I like. They're pretty expensive. And like, that's, that's, what's really hard as well is like, I put the initial investment into it and stuff like that. So it was like, I was like, oh, okay. That, that was a lot of an investment. That's what happened to us too. We got a really expensive manufacturer and it was here in LA, which is like your first mistake, right? We didn't know anything about international. And I put like a hundred thousand in, lost it. I was like, dang,

I was like, you know, I really thought it was going to be big, but because of the cost, I'm bad with that stuff too. Yeah. But it's fun. But that's what's hard too is it's like, there's certain things that it was like, I want to do clothing and like, I want to show that I can be more and I could create like tangible goods as well, not just digital goods. And so like, as well as like a product that is like of a high quality, I'm not just creating some like bullshit product that I'm just trying to fly off shelves. Like I'm trying to actually create a high luxury product. So I felt like that was kind of like what my main goal was. And I feel like that's kind of like what I've gotten out of it, where it's like, it's something that's recognized. It's something that people bring to attention. It's something

that brings value to my name and it shows that like i can do more than just porn which i think is really cool totally and so like i feel like that's the greatest benefit out of it is that people are like wow you also did a clothing brand and it's like good clothes quality clothing good like i don't think anyone else does it like there's no other influencer because they do merch so you know you're going to be with fan joy but no we design it's like custom design pants and fit all that stuff like that because it's such cute stuff are you think you'll do another like production run or you think i want to i'm trying really hard to convince playboy to do a collab with me oh that's so smart like that's what i'm like i'm pushing them so hard so playboy please

do the collab with 18 plus that would be so amazing yeah i think it would be really really cool i wonder i loved the playboy catalogs back in the day like 2005 Plus. That would be so amazing. Yeah, I think it would be really, really cool. I wonder, I loved the Playboy catalogs back in the day, like 2005, like when they would have like the belt buckles and stuff like that. Like it would be so cool. And 18 Plus clothing is very like now and current, so combining the two would be so neat. Yeah, I think that would be cool.

Do you work with Playboy? Some, like I do some work with them here and there. They want to work with me more. I just, I don't know if i'm as um available as they want me to be yeah they're trying because they're kind of competing with of right yeah they're competing with of they also are now doing some other ai stuff which would be competing with my clona so i was like i'm playing boy i think we're doing your i think we might be competitors but maybe not clothing i was like, how can we grow together in at least

something? Yeah, because it's such an iconic brand. It is. But it's kind of flopping right now. And I love Playboy, so I want it to come back. And I feel like that's the way to do it. Because they done collab with Yandy and stuff, like those lingerie. But clothing, their clothing was the best. Yeah, they had some cool, cool clothes.

And everyone loves to wear our Playboy t-shirt or Playboy sweatpants. Like, people love Playboy. It's such a good street wear. So I feel like it would be really cool if I could collab with them. What about, do you do, because yours is pretty, you do basics, but would you ever do, like, a brand, like, your logo on your shirt? It's, like, 18 plus. Yeah, our following designs, like, I have concepts for our future drops and stuff like that.

It's so cool. And I want to be more forward of the brand and stuff. Because everyone uses the 18 plus, you know, like, on X and all those places like that. Everyone uses it. So I just think that would be, like, so cool. Yeah. And it's very just, like, it's a little risque. Remember that?

There was a brand called FCUK. Remember that? It was, like, French Connection, United Kingdom. And people would wear it. So it would be, like, FCUK me. It was, like, risque. So I feel like 18 plus would be like that, too. Like, ooh, what's 18 plus about you?

Yeah. That's what I want is to wanted to be like fun and risky but it's like you know not too far from the Riley Reid brand yeah no it's so cool I mean that's like one of your and do you and does Pasha work on that with you you guys like yeah so do you guys do business together that's kind of like our only one I try to help him with like other brands or things or like when he gets like his new like Red Bull contract I like review his contract oh my god so he's like doing his own thing he's like completely separate yeah he has his own thing he has like a movie that he'll be doing so like yeah no he like he has his own kind of business and he's like a red bull athlete he has like projects that he goes

and films with them he does like stunts and movies and then he has like his own other kind of like random deals here and there that he does how did you guys meet instagram no way who slid into with them. He does like stunts in movies and then he has like his own other kind of like random deals here and there that he does. How did you guys meet? Instagram. No way. Who slid into whose DMs? I slid into. No way. Where'd you see him? I saw him just on Instagram doing some cool tricks and I was like, oh, this guy's cute. No way. And I was like, he's pretty hot and he looks like he might be good in the bedroom. How did you know? How could you tell? What's the giveaway? There was certain moves in his parkour that he was doing certain

body agility or whatever that I was like, oh, okay. I think he's got it. Wow! And then he was just like so sweet. So like initially it was just like, I was like, oh, let's collab because I was like, I don't want to go on a date or whatever. I was like, I want to meet you. You seem cool. I would like just like, I was like, oh, let's collab because I was like, I don't want to go on a date or whatever.

I was like, I want to meet you. You seem cool. Like I would like to like, like I wanted to like take him seriously, but I was like, let's go like really slow. So that's why I was like, I don't want to ask you on a date or whatever. Cause I was like, let me get to know you. Like you seem like you might actually be cool. Cause I also loved his Instagram because like, it's just him doing like cool parkour stuff

or like funny parkour stuff where he's like falling or whatever. There's not one like hot boy photo. Love that. And even like the hot boy photo he had was like pulled up like he pulled his pants up to his like chest or whatever. And he'll have like nerdy glasses. So he's like silly. Yeah. So I was like, oh, I like his vibe and the way he presents himself online and to the world.

He's like a very silly kind of guy and doesn't take himself too seriously. And so when we met, he was just like super sweet. I remember we were filming like an Instagram video and he was like playing with my hair. But like not that he had to play with my hair. He was just like sitting close to me playing with my hair. And I was like, oh, I think he likes me. Oh my gosh. Wait, so you presented it as strictly collab.

You weren't like flirty from the beginning. No, no, not really. I was like, let's do a collab together. Let's hang out. Oh, my gosh. He had a pretty good amount of following. I think I had like three million followers. But that Instagram got deleted.

So sad, I know. You're like, that was my followers. Yeah, that's what I had. So that's why I was like, oh, he'll want to collab with me. And then he's going to meet me and then realize how cool I am. It worked. It did work. Oh, my God.

So how fast did you meet in quarantine then? Yeah. Yeah. Actually, we met during COVID times. Was it how far into it? So you met 2020? We met at the end of 2019. Oh, OK.

So a little bit before. And then you guys just started dating. How soon after? You said it was slow. Pretty. No. Well, like I intended it it was slow. Pretty, no. Well, like I intended it to be slow, but it happened just to be naturally so fast. Like that's what when I say like I wanted it to be slow, it was like not that I like asked him on a date.

It wasn't like instilling romance in the beginning. It was like let's like do a collab. It's not romantic at all. Yeah. And then like when we met, it happened to be like romantic and he. And he happened to just have, like, this great chemistry with me. Like, we got along so good. I have, like, my, like, my, she's, like, my main business lady. I call her, like, my Wonder Woman, Caitlin. She was, like, there to help film the content for us.

Oh. And she, like, just saw the sparks flying between us and everything like that. Yeah. So we just, like. Wow. And then he, like, was supposed to leave for dinner that night, but he stayed until, like, 9 o'clock that night. And, like, I'm pretty sure he came over, like, the next day and was just, like, really interested. And then we kind of, like, were inseparable and got married.

How quickly did that happen? Like, did you guys get engaged or were you like, let's just get married? We decided to get married, but I was still was still like we are still doing the whole engagement thing he proposed but like yeah well i proposed actually no way i wanted to propose so bad to moses he's like don't propose to me oh my god what happened how did it happen oh i mean i didn't do anything like super crazy it's just like basic at the house like we it was like at my house but we were house hunting to go buy a house and so like we had actually found the house that we did end up buying. So like I felt like the day was perfect.

We went house hunting. We found the house. We fell in love with it. He loved the house and everything. And then I was like trying to find excuses to keep us like not going home sooner because we were setting up everything with like we had printed all the photos we have together. We printed out a bunch of photos going down the stairs. We printed out. We had like balloons filled up in the room. Just like, it was like.

That's a big thing. The whole house was set up like with roses and candles and everything. So that as soon as you walked in and then it was like the whole like, will you marry me spelled out. Oh, you did do a big thing then. It wasn't that big of a thing. I feel like it wasn't like, like I didn't feel like I planned too much or whatever. That's a lot. It was just like at our house.

But I thought you might just like in bed one day. You're like, will you marry me? But that's like a whole. Did you film it? Did you like post pictures? Oh, we, we just have like iPhone stuff. I think I like filmed him like walking up the stairs or whatever. Did he know?

I mean, I, I think he very quickly realized what was happening when we like, I don't know if he realized it was going to be a, will you marry me? But then he still had to propose to me. Oh, he did. Okay. Right away. No, not right away. He actually proposed to me after we were married. But I was like, you still have to propose to me when I'm not expecting it. And he got me really good. It was in an escape room. And in the last room, it was like set up set up with Will You Marry Me? And I love escape rooms. Oh, my gosh. So, it was, like, very up my alley and, like... Unexpected. I get into the

last room and I was like, oh, it looks like they were gonna, like, propose in, like, the next scene. And then, like, I turn around and he's, like, on the knee. And then I realized, oh, you did this for me! Oh, my God. And that was after you were married. Yeah, that was after we were married. That's what I always tell.

Like, guys, just keep trying. Even after you're married. They always say, like, marriage, like, everything falls apart, guys. Change. It's not romantic. It's like, if you keep doing that stuff after you're married, it's like, changes everything. Oh, yeah. Like, do you like married life?

Do you like being a wife? I do like being a wife. Yeah. Do you feel different? I do feel very different. Yeah. Yeah. Being a wife and then also just being a mother, I feel even more different and changes.

I feel like it changes even like the wife dynamic because now you guys are parents. Yes. And so like, I feel like even it gets even on a new level of wife and husband once you have a kid. Yeah. Now you're like, yeah, you're joined with like something else, which is like, you're not in that like honeymoon phase of like party couple of like we do fun things and we do all these like cool events traveling and yeah traveling you know

maybe a music festival or something like you don't do that anymore right and you guys did it quick so if you got pregnant within a couple months do you feel like you missed out at all on any i i feel like i missed out on that with pasha yeah Yeah. Because I was such a fun, adventurous woman. And, like, even when I would throw, like, my birthday parties, I would, like, go all out. Like, I was always, like, a very, like, wild in and out girl. And, like, I've done, like, the Burning Mans. I dated a DJ and stuff. So it's, like, I was very much into that world.

And so, like, I got it out of my system. But I feel like we didn't get it as a couple. And so, like, there's a – I feel like we didn't get it as a couple and so like there's a i feel like there's versions of me that pasha's never met yeah because we met in covid where you can't even go to a restaurant because everything's shut down like i'm a crazy foodie like pasha didn't even get to meet that version of me like i was friends with all the chefs in la type thing i knew some of the food critics in L.A. And then COVID happened.

And so there's, like, I feel like so many different versions of myself that he never met that I am excited for, like, Emma to start school and stuff so that he can, him and I can, like, have that journey of our life together. Yeah, like, seeing you in such a different light, too. It's, like, it's so weird. I remember because we met in COVID and, like, the first time we went out and people, like, recognized me. He was just, like, I didn't even, like, realize. It's like, it's so weird. I remember, because we met in COVID, and like the first time we went out, people like recognized me. He was just like, I didn't even like realize. And I was like, yes. Yeah, that makes sense.

I, people love me. You know what I mean? Yeah, I feel it's probably the same for Pasha as well. Yeah, of course. Especially going out, people just go crazy for you and stuff like that. He's probably like, or just the way people like look at you, you just don't know because you're in COVID. So you're just together, and that's all you know.

Which in a way is good, because he just gets to know you. Yes, exactly. But yeah, getting, because we got pregnant a month after we got married, too. And I just felt like we were traveling, went to the Mald that's all you know. Which in a way is good because he just gets to know you. Yes, exactly. But yeah, getting, because we got pregnant a month after we got married too. And I just felt like we were traveling, went to the Maldives, all these places. And then I was like, oh, I guess we're done traveling for a while. Yeah. But now that they're older, I feel like would you travel together as a family?

Oh yeah, for sure. We plan on like next June, we plan on going to Latvia to visit all of the family in there. First time. Yeah, it'll be my first time and Emma's first time. You're going to look so cute. I feel like if you wear these little dresses in Latvia, you're like a little country girl. I don't know if it's country. I don't know. It is.

It is. It's very country. It's very like the midsummer type thing and everything. Yeah, you're very that vibe now with your pony and stuff like that. I think that would be so cute. Interesting. What does he think about you doing like OF now? Oh, I mean, he's like.

He's supportive. He never, because you mentioned on, I think it was on Whitney's. It was a podcast where you said, maybe it was Adam's, where you said that you had a boyfriend a long time ago that like didn't support you. Oh, yeah.

Like wanted you to quit and stuff like that. And every, every guy I've ever been with asked me to quit. But I like, I retired from like shooting boy girl stuff before I met Pasha like oh I think like two years before I met Pasha I had wasn't shooting boy girl because I knew I wanted to find a companion in my life and I knew that I just wouldn't find it while I'm still shooting boy girl and so it's just a sad reality of it it's all you mother men and your ego issues that's how we were too because he was like well if you're doing that maybe we can't date you sad reality of it is all you mother men and your ego issues.

I get it. That's how we were too. Cause he was like, well, if you're doing that, maybe we can't date, you know, cause I was doing it with it. I get it.

It's kind of like a weird thing. I don't know. But the people who are cool, like Adam and let it like, Adam's just like so cool. I'm like, I kind of love that too. I think what is hard for me is like,

I've been doing this right for so goddamn long. Like if you think there's some weird shit happening like i don't know like it's it would like i feel like my personality would tell a lot more if i was some and weirdo kinky crazy girl right in porn yeah like i feel like i'm pretty normal being in porn it's like my work is just my work like we're, I'm not this like crazy kinky wild girl. You just want to go with every guy every night. Yeah. Yeah.

I'm not like you. That's not who I am in real life. Yeah. And so I feel like for me it's like, sometimes I feel like it's not fair because it's like, you know, that's my job. Yeah. I think with you especially, it's almost the opposite. I've been doing it for so long.

For you it's a little bit different. You had just started. Literally. I just started like the week before. Experimenting with yourself and it makes sense why he'd be like maybe this experimental phase is over yeah yeah no it was I definitely was like I'm gonna do this because it made so much money you know that first like month you make like a million dollars and that's like the more I've ever made in my life I'm like I'm gonna do this I'm gonna be a porn star yeah it was fun I did

it at like 32 I was like well you know what I always wanted to because porn is very to me it was always very glamorous honestly you will be so be so happy, especially as you get older. You're going to be so grateful that you gave yourself that time. Because I've met so many older women when I'm like just casually in the store. And they're like, what do you do? And I'm like, oh, I do this. And so many women will tell me, they're like, I wish that I was more adventurous in my sexuality. But because I was like married and a family and I followed these traditions

of society's norms, I did an experiment with myself and they're like, good for you. Really? That's so cool. So I think it's great that you gave yourself

the opportunity to like experiment and that you got to see what happened, what it was like. Yeah. And when you're like 60 years old,

you're going to be like, good job, Trish. I'm proud of you. I don't regret it. I do think it's cool. You never will. Sometimes I still brag. I'm like, yes, I don't regret it. I do think it's cool. You know. Sometimes I celebrate. I'm like, yes,

I was a porn star at 32 for three months. You know, because I think also with like, oh, if I just gave, anyone could do it, you know what I mean? Which is very cool.

And you got control of it. You got control of who you're with. So I'm shooting with Riley Reed and London the Plug. I was like, well, this is it. I made it. You know,

I don't need a sat or a studio. So it is, yeah, it is a fun time. I always just, I don't know it was it was an interesting time to say the least but i just thought porn was so glamorous like i always like looked at jenna jameson on the coward star i was like oh she's so pretty you know what i mean

i mean i agree i would always look at someone like her and think like that's what it takes to be a porn star yeah that's why when i started i didn't even think that i would be a so i wasn't that was not i was not trying to be right i was like oh I can do this because I want to be on page like 900 million, whatever. Ain't nobody's ever going to see my shit. Really? You really didn't think so? No. I didn't think anybody was going to see me.

Because you reinvented the porn star. Like, you're definitely like girl next door. You know, you didn't have the implants like all the other ones did. I think as well as I smile in my videos. I'm not like. Right. I'm a dancing girl. You're giggly. I'm not like, oh, right. Girl, I like your smile. Like I got so many fans tell me I had to watch your porn video a few times because you kept making me laugh. And I was like, that is the best compliment. Like their boner goes out because they're chuckling so much. I'm like, but that's what's cool. Like you want to see someone happy about it. You know, I'm happy to be here doing this. Yeah, exactly. So I feel like that. It's not, I didn't try.

It's just naturally. I enjoyed what I was doing. Yeah. So it just showed. Interesting. And did you ever try to do, because you do social media, but you don't do it like full time, like TikTok, YouTube. No, I've always wanted to.

I think that there was like a small chunk of my career where I did, but like. Will you rise with the sun to help change mental health care forever? Join the Sunrise Challenge to raise funds for CAMH, the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, to support life-saving progress in mental health care. From May 26th to 30th, Canadians will rise as one and show those living with mental illness and addiction that they're not alone. Help CAMH build a future where no one is left behind. So, who will you rise for? Register today at sunrisechallenge.ca. That's sunrisechallenge.ca.

When I found out my friend got a great deal on a designer dress from Winners, I started wondering, is every fabulous item I see from Winners? Like that woman over there with the Italian leather handbag. Is that from Winners? Ooh, or that beautiful silk skirt. Did she pay full price? Or those suede sneakers? Or that luggage?

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Find fabulous for less. It's so much work. And like I make more money doing adult or going to these other business ventures. Like it's fun to sometimes do the TikToks because I'm like, what are the kids doing? Oh, I love it. He's me. I'm like, what's the cool thing? Yeah.

Yeah, the same. Your TikToks are good. Like you have good personality. And I'm like, when you're talking about like the haters, I'm like, your TikToks are fun. Like, you have good personality. And I'm like, when you're talking about, like, the haters, I'm like, like, your TikToks are fun. Oh, thank you. And they're, like, different. That's why it's like, oh. But I remember because, like I said, when I originally, we didn't meet, but during the Vlog Squad days.

So I was like, I wonder if you were, like, a YouTuber back then. Like, I look at those videos and I cringe so hard. Oh, my God, for you. I was just, like, watching, like, David and Dom and all that whole thing. Oh, yeah. I can't picture you knowing you now and, like, how smart you are and all that stuff like that. I'm like, it's just such a weird collaboration. Was that another one where you just DMed and were like, hey, do you want to collab or how did that work out?

Yeah, that was kind of, like, the same with, like, Logan. Like, I didn't know anything. I didn't know who Logan was or anything like that. He, like, slid in my DMs. I was like, 20 million followers and you want me on your podcast? Oh, he DMed you to be on the podcast. Interesting. Wait, did you do that before or after David?

Before. David saw me on Logan's podcast. And so I was like, hell yeah, I'm going to do Logan's podcast or whatever. I was like, I didn't even know anything about like the whole forest thing or whatever. I just saw. I was like, oh, shit ton of followers. Logan Paul. I didn't even look him up or anything.

And I was like, I'll do your podcast. And because to me, I was like, I'm going to make bank. Oh, right. Because you're like, people will follow you. Yeah. I was like, if he has 20 million followers, I was like, all of going to make bank. Oh, right. Because you're like, people will follow you. Yeah. Interesting. He has 20 million followers. I was like, all of his fans are going to see me.

And all guys. I didn't know his fans were all young people. Oh, really? I don't know either. I don't. I mean, they used to be at one point. I guess now they grew up a bit. But I didn't know.

I was like, oh, older guy podcast. He's kind of cute. Like, let's go do it. Right. Like, do the podcast. And then like, I saw David Dobrik. And then. Well, he was so young.

He was, what, like, 20 or something when he met him. Yeah, he was young. And he asked me on his little podcast vlog thing or whatever. Podcast? Like a vlog? Yeah, his vlog thing. Yeah. And I also did that just because I was like, oh, another, like, huge follower.

And it actually, both of them changed the trajectory of my career. Oh, they career they were huge I mean both of them were so big at the time they were so big at the time and like having me on I think incorporated different worlds into each other and um yeah they like helped I think make my career a little bit more mainstream to some extent yeah that's when I like both I kind of like heard of Logan because of you because you know the infamous like microphone thing right it was all over I kind of, like, heard of Logan because of you. Because, you know, the infamous, like, microphone thing, right? It was all over the place. So then I, like, heard of you, obviously, then David. And I was just like, oh.

So then, because I didn't know any porn stars. So you were, like, the one. And you were, like, all over social media. And I was just like, I wonder how that even came. So you were never friends, friends with either of them. You kind of just were, like, what? Oh, I ended up becoming friends with Logan. Okay.

So he was, like, cool and stuff like that. Yeah, I didn't love David or the vlog experience. No, because you did a couple, right? I did. A couple vlogs. I think I did just one. Oh, yeah. I did do a couple of the car ones.

Yeah. And so you were just like did it for the views and stuff like that for him. Yeah. Which makes sense because he was so popular and stuff like that. Yeah, he was popular. But I didn't like vibe with him as much. Logan and I like vibed pretty good. He was like super chill.

I loved. I always respected him because he like always included me and his jake also did the same thing where like if we were like like i remember one time seeing them at like a rolling loud music festival i had like just met them not that long ago i was doing i was like with my own people and crew or whatever and like they were going like in like extra vip sections or whatever and like they were very inclusive to like bring VIP sections or whatever. And like, they were very inclusive to like bring me on and stuff like that. And I just remember being so grateful for that and being like, I don't really know these people, but they're making sure that I feel

included and stuff. And so like, there were certain things that I really liked about them. And like, I love that. Like Logan just made me feel like one of the boys, which I thought was really cool. Like he never like made me feel like some like weird girl because like there were so many girls who were just obsessed with him right yeah was that not you you didn't have a crush on any of them no i liked one a different guy in social media yeah really was he like a like a youtuber yeah but not them interesting i gotta know who it is now. I'm like, because I never, I just never. I'll tell you off. Okay, you can tell me.

I don't want to give him any. Oh, is he awful? Yeah, he's not nice. All YouTuber boys are. Like, I have such a bad taste

of men in general. Like, I couldn't even imagine. I'm surprised that you like men as well as you do because being taken advantage of by your boyfriend who had your like,

name for your website and stuff like that. But being in like, all those groups with boys, it just like gave me such a bad taste in my mouth because they're so. I don't want all men to be punished for the shitty ones because some women are crazy and horrible and if they ruined the name for us i would suck

and so like there's just like so many men in my life who've helped shape me into where i am and have helped support me and everything so it's like I can't punish all men because some of them are gross and take advantage and are not kind and stuff because there's a lot of men out there in the world who are supportive and want to help you succeed and like who are creative and intelligent and everything. So I definitely like I don't love the whole like man hater vibe, but I can feel you because like. I'm a man hater right now, but I like that. I feel you though. I need to change it. You might be right on that. I really hate men. I feel like it's really

important. Yeah. I feel you. But there's a lot of men who I think help us a lot and stuff. I can't think of any. I have one that's my husband and that like barely got through. So I don't know. My lawyer, he's really great. Oh, my lawyer, not so much. My lawyer takes advantage of me. Oh no. I get to shit on. I'm like, why didn't you tell me about this deal?

It's just so much. Yeah. I have to, I have to meet more nice men. Yeah. Maybe I'll turn around. Cause I really did. I was such a girl that just liked to be around boys, you know? Cause I always thought, well, girls, you know, you always hear they're like catty, jealous.

Yeah. I just never had girlfriends. I didn't know. And then I started trying to be friends with the girls know, because I always thought, well, girls, you know, you always hear they're, like, catty, jealous. Yeah, all that stuff. Like, I just never had girlfriends, so I didn't know. And then I started trying to be friends with girls in the past couple years, and then, like, some of them do turn out to be, like, really mean and nasty, and I'm just like, let me just not be friends with anybody. I don't want to be friends with boys or girls, because some of them can be, you know. But, yeah, just that whole social media. They were a lot younger than me, too. They were all, like. I guess, like, when I say it's, like, with men, I don't think I am friends with many men. I do business with a lot of men. That are like on the up and up. And I like to do business with men.

That's good that they don't treat you. Because again, I've had managers that just treat me dumb. They just think I'm like stupid and stuff like that. And it's just like, I don't know how to combat it. I think because you're so, not like aggressive, but you're just like, you're very confident in what you know. And I think maybe that's why they respect you more. I'm very much like, I don't know anything about anything.

Maybe, maybe. I definitely. I I'm definitely like a control freak woman, but I don't know. I was like, whenever I'm like meeting with a man and I'm like, Hey, do you want to like work with her? So-and-so or whatever. I, when I talk to a girl and I'm like, Hey, do you want to work with him? I've never had a guy be like, I'm not into women right now. And I don't want to work with them. I've had a lot of women who are like, I don't want to work with a man. Yeah. And I don't like that attitude to be honest because I've never had that experience with a man who's like, I don't want to work with her because

she's a woman. Huh. That's amazing. Women say that though. And I don't like it. Usually if a woman tells me that, I don't want to do business with her because I was like, you make it a rocky business partnership if we want to do business with men. It makes it weird.

Yeah. They must have, like, trauma. Like, I feel like my thing just comes from trauma. And so, like, I punish everybody because of one. Yeah. You know? Or two or three or four. And you're just like, oh.

That's why I just feel like I feel, like, traumatized by it. But I know what you mean. I have to get, I think I have to get therapy on it. Because sometimes I see, like, straight men. I'm like, ugh, I'm over it. You know what I mean? I judge early on and stuff like that. Yeah.

I mean, I think it's, you have an instinct for a reason. You have a gut and intuition for a reason. So like, I feel like there's that exists there to protect you. You know, we are women, we are a prey at the end of the day. Like we don't walk alone at night for a reason. Exactly. Yeah. I think that's what it is. It's just overall maybe a fear I have or something. Yeah. There's definitely fear for sure. When I had, when I found out I was having a girl, I was like mortified. I was so scared. I was like, oh man, she's going to grow up in this world where like, especially as a young girl, you don't have anyone like protecting you. You know what I mean? So it's just sick. I remind my husband of that all the time where I'm like,

you better remember the things that she's going to deal with in life because she's a woman. Yeah. And then is he, and then the fact that he's so active in her life, because I always think that too, like I had a dad, but he like lived in a different state and stuff like that. And like to have like a dad be active in your life from like the beginning means like it's going to make all the difference in the world. So she can see how like she's supposed to be treated, you know? And I feel like having that loving relationship and you guys do, I think it's so great. It's so beautiful to watch because you post, I love that you post your relationship because

it's nice, but I get also keeping it private because people are what do they think when you got married were people upset i think yeah i mean i'm not really upset more people were like sad mean to pasha do you get hate oh yeah because it's like i'm a hallway and you know i'm so loose and i've had so many men run through me and like he's kissed a bunch of dudes because he kisses me. Oh my God. You know, all that stupid 12 year old. Me, me, me, me. How did he tell you?

Would he tell you like, oh, I got DMs or you just knew? Oh, I just know. And like, I've seen some of the comments and stuff like that. And so like, I've, Pasha used to be active in his comments because like he would have like, he's doing parkour stuff. So it was like other people doing parkour or like people want to learn it. And so he used to be like really active in his comments and stuff. And like now after being with me, he just is not as encouraged.

And same with like his DMs. Like he used to be way more active in his DMs and stuff like that with like giving like help and stuff with like people or like reposting and stuff like that. He's like Pasha's like very involved in his like fan community. And I feel bad for my community because they like infiltrated and just throw a bunch of dirty shit into his comments. And you should be so happy because you like found someone you found love. They should be like so supportive. Like we love this guy.

I know. I mean, a lot of them are. But yeah, that's the worst. I know he got like so much. He doesn't even you found love they should be like so supportive like we love this guy no I mean a lot of them are but yeah oh that's the worst I know he got like so much he doesn't even check his Instagram anymore either because like so much yeah or just a lot of do you ever get the girls like early on when we were dating girls would just try to like dm and try to be like you know just because they know they were dating and to be like oh look he dm because he would dm people back just to be nice you know like he would be like oh thank you for this they're trying to trap yes and they would be like look moses dm me back oh mother and i was like you can't and he's like i was just being polite they would say oh i'm a fan because he does like photos of water so they'd say that i'm a fan he's like

they're a fan of my i'm like no they're doing it to be sneaky and they would he would see that he didn't know until like much later on like six months a year how like people can twist like you just can't reply period to anybody because it's just gonna come back out it has never happened in your relationship or no uh no i haven't and no i don't think so i haven't noticed anything no one's trying to like take him from you yeah god they better not yeah i think you try bitch try i think people are more scared of you they know me it's like a trigger i'm like insecure i feel like everyone i've been with is like cheat on me so they know i'm like insecure about stuff like that so like like early on he like gave me his password because I'm just like I'm insecure I have to check everything because people know that about me so they try to like you know instigate you the confidence that you yeah so I I have it but he has no activity on

there anymore but Bosh is different because he does do big he's like in the entertainment industry well he's a Red Bull athlete they tell him you need to post and stuff like that so he has to be on social media he has to post with those fucking Red Bull athlete. They tell him you need to post and stuff like that. So he has to be on social media. Yeah. So post with those fucking Red Bull cans or shirts and stuff. So yeah. That's so cool. What a cool story that is.

It is pretty, it's pretty cool. Honestly, it makes me really happy and it makes me really proud because I feel like my daughters has such well-rounded parents and like, and it's not, yeah. And they're both in the visual field and i'm really hoping that posh can help like shadow like make more shade on me and i'm like because he's going to be doing a movie um and that i'm really excited for him he's gonna be acting in it i think like chris hemsworth is supposed to be and like sam rockwell no way oh my god a big one yeah is it his first feature uh i think so like he's done stunt stuff he has like um

awards for like doing like stunt choreography for like the wonder woman movie and stuff like that he's like done a lot of like stuff yeah and like he's like done stuff with like six underground which is like a michael bay movie and like he's done like a lot of like movie projects um but that's what i i like that him being in the public eye i think it's really good because i can hope i hope that it like casts more of a shadow on me so i can be like look at papa right look at papa in his movie it sounds like he's doing it look at his red bull i love that you're like his cheerleader too like you know what i mean biggest cheerleader because a lot of girls wouldn't maybe get like insecure i probably would if i had like an actor

husband i'd probably be like oh no don't go do movies without me. Oh, no. No, he has like a movie that's about it's not coming out. It hasn't come out yet, but it's finished. And I like I was like pressuring him to get his friend to send them like the movie. It's not out yet, but I've seen it. Is it good? It's really good. And he has like he has lines.

He has like a full like leading role in it and everything like that. And so like it's like with like a smaller crew or like not like chris fucking hemsworth right that's huge yeah yeah but but it's like so really cool and i i've he told me he filmed this movie when we met and i've since we've met i've always asked him when can we watch the movie when can we watch the movie i want to watch the movie i want to see the movie that's hot yeah anytime i see him when we watch like his stuff and he's on stunts i'm like pause like look it's you and i'm like i'm alone do you still get excited oh yeah i think it's so cool yeah to be interested in that yeah it's like it's like bigger than my husband's in the movies yeah that would be so surreal cool yeah and then you see it and you're

like that's my husband oh my god that's exciting i love it i love the way you like light up when you talk about it because that's, like, passion right there. Yeah, no, I love it. I love what he does. I feel so grateful that we get to blend our worlds together. It's going to be so cool. Yeah, your daughter, who knows what direction she's going to go. She could do so much.

She could be entertainment. She could be doing flips. Maybe she'll be parkour. No, I don't think so. You think she's, like, she's kind of, like, sweet, more, like, reserved. Like, she doesn't, like. I mean, it's not that I don't think she wouldn't do parkour i just think like in the sense of like i mean like you don't claim what your parents identity is yeah it's like my dad's like a

computer programmer but so are you you did it you did it you did the ai you did programmer that's not a programmer you kind of got a little bit of it from him though because i would never be able to figure out the stuff you figured out streaming on and stuff like that. It's amazing. But I just feel like in the sense where it's like, you don't claim your parents' identity. And it's like, even like when you have siblings, the siblings are always so different because what identity is already

taken. So the next child, the second child is going to have a totally different identity. And so like, I don't think that she's going to be like a parkour girl or a girly girl necessarily. I feel like you both are performers and entertainers. So like she has to, I don't know if she will be, I feel like her performance may be different. Like maybe she'll do art and her performance is the art on the wall. You know, like, like I feel like she may

have her own style of performing because both me and my husband are very different type like we're like both the same type of performers we're like video performers and and so i feel like maybe she'll grasp some other type of thing something so different she might get into science wouldn't that be crazy i was gonna do with my daughter my god she probably would do something like we don't know like sports or something either one of our sports people so like what if she's like a baseball player or something? Well, see, I'm not a sports person. So like, I feel like it's really great where it's like, my husband's an athlete.

And if she wants to just sew, I'll support her sewing. Yeah. You know how to do that part of it. Yeah. That's what's fun about a kid, though, seeing their own personality. Because I have a daughter. I'm like, she'll be just like me. But seeing her just be completely herself, like, I'm like, I don't know where she gets

her personality. It's just fun to watch them. It's just her. Yeah. It's so exciting. It's just like the being a daughter. She'll be just like me, but seeing her just be completely herself, I'm like, I don't know where she gets her personality. It's just fun to watch them. It's just her. Yeah, it's so exciting. It's just like being a mom. What's the part of mommyhood that surprised you that you're like, oh, this is actually easier than I thought? All of it a little bit. Did you adjust quickly? Were you very maternal right away or did it take you? I think so. You were? I mean, I have little brothers and sisters. There's like five or six of us. I can never remember. So like, I have like a lot of little, little ones in our family. So I feel like I just had that instilled in me. Like I was like my little sister's mother or whatever.

And so I've always been very maternal, but I don't know. I feel like it was like, it was a really easy transition. I feel like, I guess like what's really hard hard is figuring out sleep training. That's just hard. Leaving your baby to cry? Oh, we haven't done it. You don't do sleep training. She's in our bed. Oh, she's in your bed. We're too scared. We put her in there for a minute and she cried. I'm like, bring her back.

Is she in a crib? Is she still in your room or is she in her own? She's been in her own room since day one. How do you do it? I know, we're not great with it. It was hard. We just let her cry, but honestly now, we just put her in her own room since day one. How do you do it? I know. We're not great with it. It was hard. We just let her cry. But honestly, now, we just put her in her bed. She rolls around her bed for about an hour, and then she falls asleep by herself. Wow.

And she sleeps from 6 p.m. till 8 in the morning. Wow. We need to figure that out. We're both very... I'll help you, girl. Okay, because that's hard. We still sometimes get up and give her a bottle. We're like, well, she's hungry. And our and our doctor's like don't they don't need food just like let her like oh like if she's hungry i want to feed her no i feel you i'm not i was i'm with the food thing i'm so i still track her food intake because i'm like i need to make sure that she's like not

hungry and i don't know if it's like trauma from my own childhood going hungry or something like that my parents were not the best parents wait Wait, really? Yeah. Oh, like they would forget to feed you or they didn't have to? I don't remember a lot of my childhood. You blocked it out. Yeah. Interesting. So I feel like there's a lot of like, even like there's certain stories that my family tells me that I'm like, oh, you think that sounds funny, but that's actually you admitting to neglect. Oh my God. You were crying for three days and it was like because we didn't feed you oh my god oh yeah i mean i don't know i don't think it was that extreme but like i didn't i didn't grow up well and stuff so i feel like there's certain things that i may

have like trauma with that i'm like like because when it comes to the feeding that one is like it was really hard for me to stop feeding her overnight because I was like what if she's hungry yeah she was hungry like I starved till the morning I don't want to snack so she should have a snack too yeah yeah it's hard the feeding thing was hard for me oh man it still is yeah to like not know I know I don't know she because my baby doesn't eat a lot so I always think like oh my god we should be like give her more food but I'm like I guess babies know when they're hungry when they're not oh yeah I don't know I'm like on the hour every hour I'm like counting the ounces and like we measure it and I'm like and she doesn't eat but like what does she eat like typically maybe like 35 ounces a day and I think she's

supposed to be eating like 55 ounces a day so I'm like she's not ever eating enough right yeah we don't even measure that I hate that stuff online though because then it makes me feel like that she's under eating but like but she's like got thick thighs yeah she looks healthy she looks healthy she's got energy she's eating yeah I know you just can't google anything I was googling so much I'm like I'm done googling I stopped reading comments too like we used to have it was like I didn't know the connotation of family channels we had something called the family channels like I'll put baby videos in here and I realized how awful family channels were but people would leave like crazy comments I'm like I'm just not reading anything anymore like don't do this don't do this I'm just

like oh you know it was too much I just was like couldn't do it parenting you yeah exactly like don't this is bad for her but then someone's like no that's good for her and I'm just like like the passy we still have her on a passy after a year I'm just like I know you're supposed to take it out but I'm like she loves it you know yeah we still do the pacifier as well yeah we do especially because like when she starts getting her molars yeah like they're gonna want something for soothing and like there's a reason we don't remember what it feels like for our teeth to come through that shit probably hurts a lot she's like she had she was going through it with the teething for sure yeah yeah there's certain times where it's like, we, we do the pacifier and like, there's certain times where

there's like things that she's playing with that are like really small that I'm like, I'll pop the pacifier in. Cause I know she's not going to put that shit in her mouth. Right. So it's like, we're able to like do certain like practices where I'm like, you're not going to eat that. Yeah. That's smart. That's, that's so good. That's like, I mean, the fact that she grasps it, too. Yeah, but I think it is good. Like, we definitely try to take it out, like, when she's, like, awake or, you know, to encourage her talking. Like, your little baby's a singer, so it's like, you probably pull it out sometimes because

you're like, I want to hear your little baby singing voice. Yeah. So. Is your baby talking? She talks some, yeah. Do you do screen time or no? We do some. We do some of, like, the Miss Rachel. Miss Rachel's educational, I think. She learns so much. She talks some, yeah. Do you do screen time or no? We do some. We do some of like the Miss Rachel.

Miss Rachel's educational, I think. She learns so much. She does Up and stuff. I'm like, okay, she knows. Yeah, she does some Miss Rachel and we do like the Disney Fantasia. Oh. Because it's got the classical music and stuff. Oh, we haven't.

Oh, that's smart. Oh, she loves Fantasia. Really? Okay, we got to get on that. She's not on Disney Kick yet. I'm like, I need to get her in a Disney mood. Yeah, I've tried all. I've tried like the Disney princesses.

Yeah, they're not into it yet. Emma doesn't like it, but Fantasia, she loves Fantasia. The old one, right? Oh, I used to love it as a kid. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's so cool. That was like her birthday theme because she loves Fantasia.

Oh my gosh, that's so fun. And you just hired, what was the kind of educator? You had like a- The Montessori. What is that? I don't know if it's Montessori or Montessori. I always say it wrong. I saw it on your story. You were looking for it. I was like, I literally Googled it. I'm like a Montessori. What is that? I don't know if it's Montessori or Montessori. I always say it wrong. I saw it on your story.

You were looking for it. I was like, I literally Googled it. I'm like, what is this? So their whole approach is like a very like gentle parenting approach as well as like catering to like the child's individual development, not like following like a basic curriculum. And so like and like honing in on like specific skill sets. So they may have like a toy that is only like a coin slot. It's not like a coin slot and a this thing and a pulley thing and a twisty thing because the coin slot will then focus on just one skill at a time rather than these will almost,

it overstimulates them and makes them underperform because there's too many developmental things happening at one time. So the Montessori approach is like being adamant about like focusing on one skill set at a time and then like also just catering to whatever that child's skill set is. If they're like not into the coin slot, but they're into the pulling, then maybe you focus into that and not this other thing or whatever, as well as then it's, like, very into, like, the practical life skills. So it's, like, everything's, like, low-level furnitures. Like, we have, like, low-hanging art for Emma so that when Emma looks at the art,

it's, like, for her. We have, like, her own, like, hand wash station and, like, things like that. So, like, the Montessori is to help them. Like, she has her own, like, low trash can and things. So it's, like, she knows, like, how to, like, just do, like, her basic things. And so it's, like, teaches them practical life skills. It teaches them as well as, like, it's the whole gentle parenting you see on, like, Instagram where it's, like, you're having, like, your big feelings and your feelings are valid. And, like, I'm going to pick you up instead of just picking them up or, like, communicating with them.

And so, like, as a mother, there's some times where you just fucking do shit. Yeah, yeah. You know, you're like, I'm your mother. But, like, as a nanny, I really want to like patient with her and like going at her level and like at her pace and which is what I love about Montessori it's catered to each individual child I never heard of this before it's so interesting you should check it out it's really really cool it's really really cool I really like it as well I love that it's just it's a whole thing it's about respecting the child and like it's it's really beautiful I really really like it I feel like

that's the thing like you don't respect like a child and so like that's when they act out and stuff like that like I know as a kid as my as a kid too like we were never respected like you're the child like you listen to me yeah but I'm sure you know your daughter has a personality she has things that she likes and dislikes for sure what are two things she doesn't like oh my gosh um two things she doesn't like like for Emmama she hates hair brushing i could tell you right now oh dislike oh shoes shoes she hates putting on her shoes you see she has a personality of herself so it's like you you would like with her you would just take your time with the shoes you you you don't know how it's gonna happen well there are certain things with the

montessori that i like it helps you to like figure out how to like patiently go. Like I'm still trying to figure out that I can't brush my daughter's hair. That's just hard. Oh yeah. She doesn't love a hairbrush. Sometimes she will, but it's hard even to style her hair. Yeah. I put one bow one day and then I tried again the next day and she was like, no.

Oh yeah. She won't. Everyone's like, why don't you put a bow on your daughter? I'm like, she hates bows. I don't want to let her put Parker's hair up all the time. I was like, how? I know. It looks so cute.

I don't know. Maybe when she was a baby, was she doing it? Because as a baby. I think so. Because even on her first birthday. But she would still be pulling her ponytail. But she does her hair. And I was like, I couldn't put Emma's hair up on her first birthday.

No, same. No, Emma would not let me put her hair up. No, Emma was mad at her hair. I was like, whatever. I'm like, she's sweaty. She's whatever. Oh, yeah, yeah. Emma always has little dread me put her hair up. No, Emma was matted. Her hair was like whatever. I'm like, she's sweaty. She's whatever. Oh, yeah, yeah. Emma always has little dreads in her hair.

It's like matted up because I'm like. It's a lot, yeah. Yeah, it's hard. It's so cute though. I think it's like. So when do you think you'll educate her? Like when do you think you'll start preschool? Because you know some kids start like two.

I know. I, again, I think with the trauma, I want to be as involved with my daughter's life and being as present as possible. And I have the ability to work from home a lot. So like we try to take advantage of that. So like, I'm trying to get her like a Montessori educator like yesterday, but at the house. So like, because they, they even have like Montessori has like great ways to even teach math.

Like they have like this like bead method where it's, like, one bead represents 10. A string of beads represents 10. A stack of beads represents 100. So if you tell the kids 642, they know six stacks, this, this, and four of this equals 642. Wow. I can't even follow that math. That's crazy. It's, like, it's really cool what they have and like the way that, and I was like, if

I learn math like that, instead of just like on a piece of paper, like it's tactile. You see it, you visualize it. You feel it, you visualize it. It's not just numbers and letters. I can never do math. It's difficult. It is difficult. And so like, to me, there's so many things with the Montessori that like prepares your

child for like a better success at life. Yeah. And so, like, we want to get ours into the house to start implementing. As well as, like, I just want to learn. I want to know what I should be doing. So, like, days where she's not there or if, you know, I have another child, I know what I can start implementing and whatnot. That's what. Are you going to have another child? I think we may. Because I saw the podcast. You're like, I know what I can start implementing and whatnot. Are you going to have another child?

I think we may. I saw the podcast and you're like, I don't know. I've got to know if it's right for Emma. That was so smart. Because of Emma, she loves kids. If I brought her over here and she saw Malibu, she's like,

So in Malibu, she loves kids. Not every kid is the same way with her.'ll be at chuck e cheese and some kids just look at her it's like i get so pissed when i see those kids i was like you are four years old and she is a baby you say hi isn't that older kids always older kids she loves to say i'm just like look at her i'm just like say hi to her no i'm like say hi to my baby yeah that's so interesting maybe it's just that age where like little girls like i don't know are just like no we're just protective parents and we're just protective parents. And we're like, play with my baby.

It breaks my heart when people, like, actually at our party, we had, like, a jump house for older kids. And this one little, like, a three-year-old went to another three-year-old boy. He's like, will you, like, come jump with me? And the parents were like, no, go ask someone else. I was like, I would be so hard. I mean, I get it. It was hot. Maybe they didn't want them in the hot jumpy thing.

But I would still, like, play with them. Like, I would be so sad for my daughter if that was her. I mean, you saw my face. I am sad even for that kidding. It's not even mine. I was kind of sad. I'm like, I get it, I guess. You do what you use your boundaries, but yeah. Yeah, I know. Fuck all those stupid

boundaries. But do you think now would you be trying in the next year or two years? Oh, are you 30 yet? Yeah, I'm 32. Oh, but that's still very young. Yeah, I'm like 35. So I was like, I need to do it now. You're not that much older.

She's like, geriatric pregnancy at 35. Like, literally, it's crazy. And then they say, like, the chances of twins get higher when you get older. I'm like, let's, like, have a baby now because I can't do twins. Like, if I had twins, I would. I also would be really sad if I had twins because I would want, I would feel like Emma would be left out. Yeah, totally. Like, don't you feel like Malibu would be left out if you had twins? I know people who have feel like Emma would be left out. Yeah, totally. Don't you feel like Malibu

would be left out if you had twins? I know people who have twins and everyone just talks about the twins, you know. It's like the twins and it's, yeah, I agree. Not even like the, it's even like their sibling dynamic. The twin sibling dynamic will be closer than the other. For sure. You see that with all twins and stuff like that.

I like the idea because then you have more kids at one time, but yeah, it also would just go nuts with the feeding schedules. Because you guys have a night nurse, you said. How was that? Because I am telling Moses, I'm like, for this next one, maybe we should get a night nurse. Because he stayed up with me. Have a night nurse. Yeah.

Have a night nurse. Because it helps with the sleep training, honestly. Because then you get your sleep and everything. And like the night nurse, she stayed in the room with Emma. So we just had like a little, like little bed thing. She can like, like a, kind of like a reclining chair where she could just like chill in the bedroom with Emma. And then she could do, bring her to me for breastfeeding. And then we did up until six months, I stopped, I stopped, I had milk production issues. I think I was just like really stressed out because I was trying to get back into

work and everything. I thought I'd go back too quickly. Yeah, I think so. I was trying to juggle too many things at one time. And, um, then we did the bottle feeding, but with the bottle feeding, it makes it so, so much easier. Yeah. We just did bottle right away. Cause I was like, I cannot, I wasn't getting, I didn't get up. I mean, he got up for the first three months cause I was like so tired. I was so exhausted. Yeah. And you had a C-section. It's hard. That's how I didn't know how you would do it because with C-section, like you physically can't pick your baby up. Like, you can't. Like, I couldn't stand.

We had, like, steps on our bed. I, like, couldn't even, like, walk down our bed. That's what I worry about. Like, because for me, I am such a control freak type person that, like, I worry, like, the healing process. Because I know I was moving sooner than I should have been. And, like, and I know and I'll do it again. And, like, that's where I worry is, like, not giving myself the healing that I need because it's, like, I'm just such a go-getter.

Yeah. And I'm the type of person, you're going to do it wrong. Right. So I might as well just fucking do it. Yeah. That's the hard part. And I feel like you're just so conditioned to, like, get back to work. In general, like, women who have, like, regular jobs have to go back in three months.

Yeah. And I feel like that's just, like, not natural. Like, I feel in Canada and other countries they have they have like a year, you know, before you go back to work. Oh yeah. There's a reason my milk production stopped because of stress levels and everything. And then like. Did your doctor tell you that?

Was he, did you ask him like why it stopped? Was he telling you? No, I just, I just knew, I knew I was, I, what, everything that was going on at the time, like I was stressed out. Oh man. Yeah. And so just stop producing milk. Yeah.

And I like, it was just struggling. And like, there was a week that I was struggling. And so I was like, we're doing bottles because like, I was like, feeling like I wasn't feeding my baby for like a week. Yeah. Because I was like, what are my boobs doing? And like, breastfeeding is hard too, because it's like, sometimes you can feel like the milk let go and other times like you can't. Oh, really?

So it's like, you can't like, yeah, it's like's you know i don't know the way i compare it is like it's like a painful but feel good sensation you know when you have your hair in a ponytail you take your ponytail yes it hurts and feels good at the same time that's like what it is where it's like you're like relieved like you're you're feeding your baby you can feel the milk but it also kind of hurts like it's like this weird sensation of when the milk is letting go yeah so but like you can't track like with formula you can track how much they're eating you know how much and so like during that issue of when i was struggling i was like i don't even know if she's eating yeah or how much and like i don't feel it letting go and like i was stressing myself out even more and so i was like we're getting into the milks the formulas i feel like that should be like normalized now. I got so like the most stretch my gut was not

breastfeeding, like not even trying. And I was just like, I don't know. I just like, I just, I just, I was so stressed after the pregnancy. I was just so stressful. Yeah. I was like, I'm going to mess up this baby. I'm going to do something wrong. Like I didn't have maternal instincts right away. So I just was very, I don't know. I didn't want to do it. And people like shame me so much. And I'm like, well, she got fed, you know what I mean? It's not like we weren't feeding her, but I get it. I like the idea of like bonding with her. I was just scared.

I heard so many horror stories about breastfeeding so I was just like nervous. Yeah, what do you like? Like chapping. Oh, pain. Like just pain. And I guess I have a high pain tolerance, but I don't know.

Your C-section though, would you get another one? Would you get a second one? I mean, by choice, I don't want to, but like if I have to. I feel like they say it's better to get a C-section if you already had one.

There was, there was a influencer, Tammy Hembrough, I think her name, she's like a fitness, do you know her? She's like an Australian fitness girl,

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Is it like you had the two C-sections? Vaginal birth after C-section? Yeah. After cesarean. So that's what she had. She had like her third one naturally after two C-sections. And I was like, and she did it naturally. And I was just like, but I heard, it's like, I don't know.

I could be way wrong. I'm not an expert, but like you could like rupture. Yeah, I've heard the uterus rupturing or something like that. Yeah, so a lot of people just schedule it if you've already had one. For me, I thought it was very easy because I pushed for four – well, you pushed long. I mean, how long did you push? I pushed four hours, right? That was long. Well, I didn't, like, get even into the pushing part.

Oh, you were just laboring for 42 hours. Yeah, we were laboring. And that's why I started to get worried because I was like, is something wrong? Because I'm laboring and And like, when is when is the pushing going to happen? And I wish I this is what I tell myself now that I wish I would have. I wish I wouldn't have started counting my contractions as labor. And like, that's what I felt like. And I feel like I started with myself because I started to worry something was wrong because like some women can labor like or couldn't get contractions like a

week before oh i didn't know yeah some women like have contractions like a week before and you just have a lot of random contractions or whatever like that painful like oh my god like yeah i don't think it's like as like consistent yeah when that when it's like those short windows every couple minutes like labor and everything okay so you weren't doing No, but I was already at my 10 day mark of where I would need to get induced. Because you were past. I was already past due. So when I got my contractions, I think because I was already past due, I put in my head, this is labor time because you can't, you can't wait any longer for the labor at that

point because I'm already past due. So I felt like in my head head I was like my contraction start. That means labor started. And so then and now I'm counting a clock at this point. And so like I feel like psychologically I think I think I psyched myself out and I like with myself. And when I started counting the clock and stuff because I think put a stress on my body and what I expected the timeframe to be. And like,

I knew my mom had like a 14 hour labor. So I was like, okay, like it might be about a 14 hour labor. Like, and then after 30 hours, I was like, okay,

we're going to the hospital because I was like, I've been trying, I've been sitting here. We broke my water at the, at my house. At your house. Yeah. Were you in the bath?

Were you in the tub? Were you in the tub? I was doing the whole tub thing. So you were sitting there for how long? I mean, it was like in and out, in the tub, in the shower, in the bed and stuff. I threw up twice. Oh no, were you in pain? Oh yeah, oh yeah.

It was bad, yeah. It was like, it was the pain where it's like, you don't fucking, someone tries to talk to you and I was like. Oh, you were calm, I screamed. Oh no, I was screaming, but I mean like, I was like oh you were calm I screamed oh no I was screaming but I mean like I was like I can't I can't hear anything you're saying I was I was cursing on everyone and I'm not like that I'm not like that I don't know I had a really bad experience as well as

like with my midwife I got really pissed because she like was doing computer work while I was laboring. So I come out in the living room and I hear fucking of her nails clapping on her keyboard. Why are you having contractions? And I'm in labor. And I was like, this bitch. Oh, no. And this is, like, your personal midwife. This is my midwife. And now I feel forced back into my

bedroom and when I was trying to like come out into the living room and I wanted to be able to like go outside and she just reclused me back because I was like, your f***ing keyboards, you have no value of my personal space and as a midwife, you should be understanding and you should have never even

f***ing opened your laptop. No, that's how I feel. That's how I feel. And I was just like, I'm, I was very upset. And then even after I ended up having to go to the hospital, they didn't like follow up with me after we,

what? Yeah. And like, I meant like they're like Instagram famous. Yeah. A lot of followers. Yeah. And I was like really upset with how I was treated and how they never followed up with how Emma was doing. That's crazy. They never came back to my house for like,

you know, the follow-up meetings or whatever. Or they didn't even go to the hospital with you? My doula went to the hospital with me. So you had a midwife and a doula. What's the difference? The doula is the one who like helps you during your, so she's the one who like massages you, is getting your water. She's the one who's like, massages you, is getting your water. She's the one who's, like, taking care of you. Where the midwife is, like, helping the birthing of the baby and making sure, like, the baby – they're kind of like the doctor. So there would be no doctor in a home birth? No. Wow.

No doctor. Why did you decide to do that or why did you want to do that? I didn't want to feel like I was forced into anything that I didn't want to be forced into at the hospital and stuff like that. And so I think, and like, I wanted to be able to like be at the comfort of my home and the freedom of my will. And I knew that there would be some hours long. So I was like, okay, like, I don't want to be like stuck there for like 14 hours, just like in a little room that feels unnatural. And maybe my labor will be delayed because I'm in this like unfamiliar environment. And so I wanted to try and do it at home and we did try to do it at home, but

it just wasn't progressing the way that I felt like it needed. And then after 30 hours and also like I'm hungry as having slept, you know, I've already thrown up twice. And so then we get to the hospital labor for like another 13 and then then i got a fever and that's why i needed a c-section as i started to get a fever and the doctor was like you're starting to put the baby at risk of getting a temperature if you're now that you have a temperature so they needed a c-section and then two hours after we were prepped into surgery was this a doctor did you see a doctor at all through your pregnancy then? Yes. I lied to my doctor and told him that he was the only go-to doctor. Oh, interesting.

I also lied to him and didn't tell him that I broke my own water. I told him that we— It broke naturally. Yeah. Because then I think it's, what is it, malpractice and they can't work on me? So I was like, what the f—? So then you're just going to let me have a baby in the stream? Oh, is that really?

I don't know. I was like, it was fucking weird. I knew they have to fever and you're breathing yeah i was like what the fuck are you guys talking about you're not gonna see me that's interesting i never thought about that yeah yeah there's some like weird rules or something so i just lied to everyone you gotta do what you gotta do you gotta get that baby out exactly and the doctor that i got i actually made sure he was skilled in C-sections because Lena, how she talked about how her scar messed with her self-conscious and stuff.

So I found a doctor who was like vaginal reconstruction surgery guy, OBGYN. Because I was like, if anything happens, you need to make me look good. That's why I like my doctor. He specializes in C-section. Did it within 10 minutes. My scar is so tiny. like my doctor. He specializes in like C-section. Did it like within like 10 minutes. My scar is so tiny. I have bigger scars on my boobs than my C-section. It's like crazy.

So it is important to get. Because it can mess you up. I mean, I have so many scars on my body, so it didn't matter to me. But if you have a, like you never had surgery, right? So to have like a scar there all of a sudden, you're probably like, does it bother you? It only bothers me because it time stamps my porn that I'm shot after having my daughter oh yeah yeah that's the only thing that I don't like is that time stamp that's why I stopped just because I used to post like nudes and nude whatever solo stuff and then I kind of

stopped because I was like oh yeah people will it's not even people it's also just me I just struggled so hard with I still I love being nude I love doing solo stuff I love it but I just struggled so hard with it and now being a mom I'm like oh I don't know I don't know it's just kind of and I don't see anything wrong with it but I always was just like oh I don't know I'm a mom and then like also c-section there's like a c-section like fetish and it kind of made me feel a little weird about it yeah you know where they want to see like anytime I see a comment who's like I love your new scar I'm like shut, ugh, shut up. Leave me alone. I feel so violated. No, that one is the only one.

I say yuck over nothing, but I'm like, ugh. Like, stop. That's disgusting. I feel so, talk about my gaping butthole all you want. My C-section scar, leave it alone. That's personal. They call mine a gaping butthole, and I never do anal. I think I tried once, and it got a little bit in there. And I'm just like, why am I not gaping? But love to say it yeah they fantasize about it that's what it is

they photoshop any pictures they can or a dark hole that's interesting the time stamp thing I never thought about that but that's like that's kind of what I thought in theory and then when he said I was like oh yeah that's how I felt yeah it's kind of yeah it's just a personal thing yeah because it's just it's just so hard. And I'm just like, oh man, I don't know. But being a mom, I mean, you know, either way it's like, I've done it. So at this point it doesn't even like matter, but it's just like, what do you do? I don't know. Cause I've also like, there's been people who wanted to collab and like, oh, it sounds so fun. But then my body changed so much too after my pregnancy. I like,

I just, my, I still feel pregnant. I carry it so high. So it's so high it appears I just look like I have a pregnant belly the whole time, you know? But you didn't do any adult stuff while you were pregnant, right? I did like a couple of girl girls, but no. But not like fully. No, no, no. Anything I did was like early. In like baggy clothes. Oh. So like if I did anything, it was not selling the fact that I was pregnant.

That's interesting. I just thought it was like, I thought it was like so beautiful. Like I was just like, I didn't see anything wrong with it, but I did get a lot of criticism for it. I was just like, I thought it was just pretty, I wasn't doing anything with anyone. I just thought taking nude photos are beautiful. I wanted to do that and stuff, but I felt like I couldn't because I knew how people look at me. So I knew that they're like sexualizing that. So I didn't want that so there was like I only did like one like the nude photo with the patty or thon she's like one of the famous like family instagram photographers yours was so pretty thank you yeah it was super beautiful but like that I was like okay that's very artistic that's

like artsy that's like it's like you could tell it's very much a maternity shoot right it's not like just me in the bathroom. Because I feel like I have lost those rights now as a person. Like being in the public eye, I don't think I have the same ability to do that. And that it's looked upon the same. And I don't want my daughter, like I have

the photos in my camera roll. Like they exist. They're just not online. So it's like my daughter will see that I was very confident and loved myself and cherished my body during that time. But like, she'll see that I didn't share it with the world because of the creator I am. And I've shared so much of myself. I don't think they should get that. What do you say? Cause I get this, I was getting those questions a lot. Like, Oh, what do you know? Your daughter's going to grow up. She's going to be

bullied. She's going to be this. Like, what do you say to that? I this. I was getting these questions a lot. Like, oh, what do you know? Your daughter is going to grow up. She's going to be bullied. She's going to be this. Like, what do you say to that? I mean, a lot of times it's like everyone's going to be bullied. I was bullied as a kid. Like, I'm sure you were probably bullied. Yeah. You everyone gets bullied.

And I mean, and the reality is, it's like I the only reason that kids would be bullying my kid is because of the parents. Why would a child know what I do for a living? Yeah. Why would a child know me for anything other than Emma's mom? That's the only thing that they should know me as. Yeah. So if a child has any further information, that is because of the parent's fault and that was poor parenting.

So in the end, it results in, falls down to poor parenting. Poor parenting, yeah. Not to my child or my decisions in life. And I feel like, I know with my daughter, I'm like, she'll be like the most open-minded person because like people will say that stuff and judge and stuff like that. I just, you know, she'll be just so open-minded with anything. She wouldn't judge other people, you know. I just feel like those kids, like you said, that get by their parents and judge and stuff

like that, like judging a kid for their parent, you know, it's just so. Yeah, because how would they know? Yeah. How would they know what I do? Right. There would be no fucking reason that they would know. Obviously up until a certain age when she hits like 13 years old, now it starts to get a little tricky.

But like at that point, she'll already know like what I'm doing and we'll have some sort of relationship between that. But that's also another reason why I think about having another kid so that my daughter isn't alone in her experiences in life. Because I do realize it is challenging to have me, not me as a mother, but an adult performer as a mother. And so I feel like being able to provide her a companion to experience those things in life is important. Yeah. And so that's something we've thought about as well. I think that's a weed, too, because I feel like one is very tough.

I'm like, oh, my God, one. I could be one and done. But it's like, yeah, to have that experience and also just later in life when we're not around forever, you know, you just want to, I don't know. Because I talked to so many only children, and they felt that they had to start a family very quickly and stuff like that. Really? Because, yeah, like, I talked to this one girl, and she was the only child, and one of her parents died sick. I just felt like I had to start a family, because I didn't have family, you know what

I mean? Interesting. Are you close with your family, like, your parents? You talk about your dad a lot. Is he still, like, active? Like, is he with Emma a lot? Well, he lives in Georgia, so no. But, yeah, I was actually talking to him on the phone today on my way to the class.

I was like, I have an hour-long job. Call my dad. Oh, cute. So you guys are close. You guys are still close. Because I saw, like, maybe it was an older interview. We weren't close for a few years. I wasn't close with any of my family.

Once I, like, got into porn, they kind of all disowned me, and I disowned them. And there just, like, wasn't a relationship and nobody could quite understand why I made the decisions, nor could they understand that I was like happy and thriving. Yeah. They just decided for me that I was miserable and unsuccessful. Oh my God. That you were like forced to do it or something. Yeah, exactly.

And I remember like my auntie crying me calling And I was like, why are you crying? Like, you're acting like I'm here against my will. Like, this is really bizarre. And you're freaking me out with your own f***ing issues. Yeah. And it's not like you have your name. Like, my name was, like, I used Paytas. So, like, all the Paytas's out there, they get, like, some hate.

But you weren't using a family name or anything. So, why were they upset? I don't know. They're just. It's weird. But, just, it's weird, but, um, no, I have a pretty good relationship with my, my father and he, he, he's not as active with Emma as we would like, but he's far. How did you mend it? Cause I had the same situation. I talked to my dad for a long time. How did you mend it? Um, I think it was like, uh, was it just

like, cause with my daughter, with my mom, I was able to mend it with my daughter. Oh, interesting. So you weren't talking to your mom for a while and then when you she came over. That's beautiful though. Just because I was like, well, if my daughter has a kid and she's pissed off at me and she's like, you're not gonna meet my kid. I would be so heartbroken. Could you imagine if Malibu was mad

at you and was like, you're not meeting your granddaughter. That's my biggest fear. She hates me one day. That's why I try to do as much as I can with her. Yeah. That's amazing, though, because a lot of people aren't like that, you know. No. They hold that from them. Is your mom local?

Does she live close to you? No, no. None of our family is local. Right. Fortunately, thank God. Yeah, there's benefits to it, for sure. Yeah, your own family. I like my space.

Yeah. But that's cool. That's amazing that, like, that brought you guys back together. Yeah. Yeah. So I even told my mom at one point where it was like because I forced myself and then like I told my mom I was like I forced myself to talk to you but now it's now I'm enjoying it like now like I look forward to calling you and stuff because like I was like I want to be vulnerable and I want to be honest and I want to tell her like hey I'm actually enjoying

these calls now just so you know oh my gosh's amazing. That gives like so much hope. Cause I know so many people come from like families. I'm like, I was the same way with my dad. We didn't talk for so long. And then I'm like, but there's hope. But now we're really close. You know, we're super close. He's really great with my daughter and stuff like that. But it just takes a minute sometimes. So I was like, if you have bad family, maybe it'll come around. Not that you always like forget everything that happened in the past, but you just like move forward. And sometimes it's not meant to be. That's true. I mean, there's some crazy cases for sure. And then you just like cut people off completely. I'm both. I see both. I'm like, well, it's family. Try to work it out. But at the same time, it's like sometimes family is just shit. You know,

I don't, I don't think that just because someone is family that you should force yourself to be in a traumatic relationship or a toxic relationship. And so I think it's really important to like value yourself and the energy that's coming to you. And so I think it's really important to like value yourself and the energy that's coming to you. And even if it's family, if it's toxic, it's toxic. It doesn't matter. You need to protect yourself and your own energy. And I have some family that is like that. And to me, it's actually important for me to show Emma that like, I value myself more than I, I, I value myself enough to not put myself in these toxic environments. Even though it's my family, I'm not going to let myself feel succumbed by guilt or pressure in society to force a relationship to happen that is not healthy.

No. And you hear about that a lot. It's like stay with them. Or even like with marriages, people are like, oh, people give up on marriage too easily. I'm like, well, you don't know. They could be getting like hit or something behind the scenes. Yeah. So I just – yeah, it's better to just cut it off when it's not healthy.

Yeah, exactly. When it's not feeding you what you need, then it's better to just cut it off. You're very like, you talk a lot about energy and that. Are you like spiritual? Do you have like a spiritual practice? No, I'm not. You bury our energy though. You're burying that.

I believe in energy, I guess, in more of like a scientific way, not like a spiritual way. Like a big bank theory. We're all like energy creating energy. Yes, exactly. But it is kind of spiritual because it's like positive energy creates positive energy and negative. I mean, I guess. But it's not like this like mystical thing. It's like I just feel like that there's like energy transfers and stuff like that and so

like and i just i just truly believe in that and like i feel like there's like these frequencies that we are not aware of that we're all on and stuff and so it's like even like when it's like you think of someone and then they call you or whatever it's like you guys were on a frequency that is like not knowledgeable to any of our naked eyes or our information. Like we just don't know. That's why I feel like science and spirituality connects. I had a whole spiritual awakening in three years ago. And like, that's what I learned so much about is like frequencies. Like they talk a lot about it and like Abraham Hicks and like those kinds of things in the secret. And it's like frequencies, vibrations, how you're like,

if you change your frequency, you can all be on this different vibrations and you feel it. You feel the energy. It's like when you DM me, I literally was just was just like that's crazy because i don't think you had followed me i was following you and i was just like oh my god that's so weird i had followed you for so long i saw emma's birthday and stuff like that's like oh my god our daughters are the same but we just lost touch so i was like it's kind of weird like reach out so then when you reach out to me i was like oh my god i literally have been like watching every single thing you do it was like really cool it was such a cool like synergy i guess or energy i guess you could say no i mean it's really cool. It was such a cool like synergy, I guess, or energy, I guess you could say. No, I mean, it's really cool to see people and like, obviously it's like very casual in life to just like you bounce around and you meet people. We like met like briefly and everything

like that. And so like, I think it's so cool to see how different our lives were just a couple years ago and to where they are now. And like to see you also with a little girl, I was like so thrilled for you and everything like that. I remember seeing your guys' wedding photos and I was like, that's so badass. It was so cool. It was right after yours. It was like a couple months after yours. So it was like very parallel. Yeah. But you're such a fun character in like the type of the way that you live your life and the way you go in your journey of life. It's always just really cool and really interesting. And so when I saw that you were doing your podcast now and everything always just really cool and really interesting and so when

I saw that you were doing your podcast now and everything I was like oh my gosh like I would love to get on it I was like dying at the who what's the name of that person that you had on which one the what's oh the her with the wig um with the wig oh uh Terry Jo yes yes Terry Jo Terry Jo's amazing Terry Jo had me dying. Did you know that character from TikTok? No. Oh, really? I just saw it on your podcast. No way. And I was like, oh, this Terry Jo character

is funny. She's crazy on TikTok. She'd be on TikTok lives and stuff like that. And after I gave birth, I went live with her. She's so crazy, so funny. Oh, so fun. That's why I love TikTok. They have this whole new realm of influencers just like people like just so random oh yeah like the npc thing did you do that no no oh you would have been so good i did it i love the npc trend because it's so it was so easy you make like thousands

of dollars in like an hour like it was so cool i've never done tiktok live you just wait really oh my god it's so it's but it's so much fun people okay i used to do of live right and i was like this is pretty good you make like a thousand dollars for like an hour but tiktok live you can make like six thousand dollars an hour wow yeah just literally doing nothing but the npc one was great because you know the idea was like you get a gift and you eat a hot dog and hot dog i have no idea what they equate to maybe a dollar maybe five dollars i have no maybe a penny i don't know but people keep sending gifts and you just keep talking about the gifts so you get all this like and i kind of felt bad because i want to hand you're a penny. I don't know. But people keep sending gifts and you just keep talking about the gifts. So you get all this like, and I kind of felt bad because at one hand you're

just like, okay, I don't want to take like a dollar from somebody, but it's kind of fun. It was, I don't know. I'm always like a hustler deep down too. Like I love to just hustle for money, for anything. So I'm not above doing something for a dollar. I'm like, give me the hot dog. And I guess it's like sexual in nature, I guess a little bit, but not really. It was more just like a robot, you know, like a fantasy, which is like, oh my God, you should do TikTok live. But I guess you don't, you do so much other stuff. No, I may have to try it really. It was more just like a robot, you know, like a fantasy. Which, oh my god, you should do TikTok live. But I guess you don't. You do so much other stuff. I may have to try it sometime. It sounds interesting. My god, it's fun and it's wild. TikTok just has

like wild people. It's a whole different audience too. Can you make money on it even if you're like not monetized on it? Yeah, I think, right? Anyone can make money off TikTok live. But I think you're there. I mean, you're there. I don't know. I mean, I have followers, but like I don't know. You're not a creator program or anything like that? I don't think that they let me. No, you can just apply I mean, I have followers, but like, I don't know. You're not in a creator program or anything like that? I don't think that they let me.

No, you can just apply because you have the followers. They will. Because you're not like adult on TikTok. Yeah, I don't know. Are you? People hate me everywhere. On TikTok? No.

Everywhere. No, people love you. They only like me in person. You are such a good personality. You're such good energy. You're such. But that's what's cool about you because you are a girl's girl, but I also love that you go for the guys too because I'm so anti-men and I kind of love that you're

also like, guys are okay. Coming from someone who's done porn and been like, you know, taken advantage of. Like, I think that's like, because I think people think porn stars and they think like, oh, they probably, you know, strippers. They end up being like lesbian. They like don't like men, you know, and stuff like that. Yeah. I mean, it happens sometimes. Yeah. No, I like guys.

I like men. I love that men I love that I love that and I'm like oh you know what we're gonna turn this around we're gonna be more pro that yeah I think it's important no it is there's some good ones Moses is a good one Pasha seems like a good one I love that I like it she's like he seems like a good I mean I don't know I say someone's a good person and they turn out to be like this horrible I don't know no he's like an angel like just seeing dating you would be very difficult, you know, getting all that hate and stuff like that. So I'd love that he just.

No, I'm a difficult person to date without the hate. Right. I'm a challenging woman. It's a lot. But the fact that you guys did that like circus at your wedding, I was just like, oh, this is like fun energy. This is good energy. You guys are so like good together.

I think it's such a beautiful thing. Where do you see yourself in like ideally five years if you had like the perfect life vision? I mean, my goal in life right now would to be to have like a cartoon. So I would love to have a cartoon. I saw you were doing, talking about doing TV shows. Is it like, is it actually happening? Cause I heard you talking about this. I mean, I like have been working on it off and on for the last few years and stuff so like i took a break because of the whole like writer's strike and everything like that because i was like planning on trying to start take stuff more seriously um but um hopefully now i can get to take it more take it to someone who wants to like maybe buy it out or something but i've been

i've been working on it for a long time. So it's like. You have animators with you? Mm-hmm. The fact that you can find these people, it's amazing. Like you just have this idea and you're like, what do you do? Go on LinkedIn and you're like, I'm looking for animators? I don't know. I just somehow find people.

Wow. I feel very lucky. I have like some like guardians in the galaxy. Guardians. Who help me in life and they like, you know, they help my paths and stuff like that. See, that's spiritual. I know you're saying science, Guardians, but there's also like angels or something like that. No, I know.

It's all the same, I think. Yeah. There's definitely something that like helps me in life and brings certain things in alignment. Which is like amazing. And would it be an adult cartoon or a kid's cartoon? Like, strapperella? Yeah, it would be an adult cartoon. Would it be you?

Not necessarily. It's kind of, like, based on porn all in a whole. So it would just be kind of, like, a funny cartoon and, like, all of the crazy, stupid things. And I want it to be a cartoon so that we can exaggerate all of the unrealistic things that people say are happening in adult. I wonder where that would live. Like, I guess, like, adult, like, Cartoon Network used to have, like, Stripper Ella or something. I would love, like, my dream is Adult Swim. I don't know if Adult Swim or, like, Comedy Central, like, South Park.

Like, if I could be in, like, South Park and then my show comes on or my show and then South Park after. Oh, my. Yeah, yours would come out at, like, midnight, I feel, after it. That would be, like, so cool. Yeah, that's, like, my dream. Who does South Park? Maybe we should contact them. Oh, I forget their names.

It's, like, those two guys, but it's on Comedy Central. It's not Seth MacFarlane. It's not. I don't know anything about these cartoons. No, Seth MacFarlane is the family guy. Oh. I thought South Park was someone famous, too. The other two guys who went to, like, one of those awards, like, high on acid. I don't know. Do you know? Do you know who I'm talking about? The guys from South Park? someone famous too. The other two guys who went to one of those awards high on acid.

I don't know. Do you know who I'm talking about? The guys from South Park? Oh, we know Matt. I know none of these. I don't know any of the other teams. I know what they look like. Oh, my God.

Well, call them up. I feel like if anyone could do it, you could. Just send a little DM. Maybe. That would be crazy. And you're working on other TV shows too. I was working on another one. Sadly, none of the companies wanted to buy it.

Was it reality scripted? It was a on another one. Sadly, none of the companies wanted to buy it. Was it reality scripted? It was a scripted show. And so sadly, it didn't work out. But that's okay. It'll come around. I know. I always like pitch myself. Like this show too.

I always pitch no one wanted it. And then I'm like, I'll just do it myself. And then sometimes it's bigger that way. You know what I mean? People don't see your vision like you see your vision. Yeah. You know. That's why you just do things yourself.

Like your 18 plus clothing. Yeah, exactly. But sometimes I feel like it would be really cool to be able to bring it because they will have tools that I just simply don't. And like, I think there's certain times where I'd be willing to like forfeit things so that it can be more and be greater. Yeah. I think it's like, also they look for certain things at certain times, like, you know, cooking shows were all the rage and then like, well, we're not looking for cooking shows and we're working for this. So yeah. Like with a show that like we're just pitching, they were like certain things at certain times. Like, you know, cooking shows were all the rage. And then, like, well, we're not looking for cooking shows anymore. We're looking for this.

Yeah, like, with a show that, like, we were just pitching, they were like, oh, this is, like, too, like, uplifting. Like, everybody wants to watch, like, you know, drama and crazy fucking true crime based on a real story type stuff. Yeah, it's all, like, dark. I know. I miss those days of, like, feel good. Yeah, like, were you pitching, like, Seventh Heaven or something? I mean, kind of.. I know. I miss those days of like feel good. Everyone's really into dark. Yeah. Like were you pitching like Seventh Heaven or something? I mean, kind of. I love that. I miss those shows. Kind of like an adult type of, yeah, like a sitcom type of adult show. But, um. They'll come back. Those will come back, I think, because I miss those. We watch like

Home Improvement at night and I'm just like, oh God, these shows are so good, you know? Yeah. Like, but I tried watching like the Ted Lasso. I can't fucking do that. No. There's no new shows. Are there any that you watch? I can't do Ted Lasso. I can't fucking do that. No. There's no new shows. Are there any that you watch? I can't do Ted Lasso. I can't. We tried that one. I really liked this one show on Netflix called Happy, where it's a guy and his kid gets kidnapped

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Benjamin Moore, see the love. Try to get, like, saved from, like, the bad guys who kidnapped her. It's actually really good because it's, an adult comedy and there's like a funny little and a little imaginary friend. Oh, I never heard of this. It's a lot of action and cursing and crazy and certain scenes I had to look away because I was like, oh my God, I can't watch this. It's too much.

Oh my gosh. Is anyone famous in it? I think the guy is a famous actor, but like I don't know him. But he's like, he's like one of those like, oh, you're like, oh yeah, like I've seen him. Yeah, right. Just know the face. I know because there's everything like Euphoria 2 is really like, I don't know him. Yeah. But he's, like, he's, like, one of those, like, oh, you're, like, oh, yeah, like, I've seen him. Yeah, right. Just know the face. I know, because there's everything, like, Euphoria 2 is really dark. I didn't watch it.

I watched, like, three episodes. I'm like, this is so dark. I can't watch it. It was, like, drugs and high school kids having sex. I'm like, this is a lot. Yeah. Euphoria was, like. Did you watch it?

I did. And, like, I felt like I was, like, this is too unrealistic. Yeah. Like. Or some people say too realistic. They say sometimes that happens. I don't know. I don't know. Someone's like, it's dark. In what school

are they even allowed to dress like that? Well, that's true. That whole part. I guess people having sex in high school. I'm like, I wasn't having sex in high school, so I don't know, but maybe that's how it is now. Wait, but you were sexually active at that age? Not really in high school. No. Not until after. Were you? I age? Not really in high school. No. No. Not until after.

Were you? I was having orgies in high school. Oh, my gosh. I think I was very horny, but I wasn't having sex. Yeah, no. I was definitely very sexually active, but, like, I just don't think it was to that crazy extreme of, like— Yeah.

But, I don't know. I guess maybe. I mean, yeah. Actually, I did have, like, a friend who, like, overdosed from drugs. Oh, so you lived the euphoria. That's real, then. Yeah. Yeah, maybe. Oh, my God. That mean, yeah. Actually, I did have, like, a friend who, like, overdosed from drugs. Oh, so you lived the euphoria. That's real, then. Yeah, yeah, maybe. Oh, my God, that's actually sad. I mean, not laughing, because it's just like, no, but sad. That's really sad, because I don't know.

Oh, well, you were in Florida, too, so that makes sense. I'm, like, in the Midwest. Like, no one's doing anything back there. Yeah, yeah. I grew up at, like, 15 years old going to all-age clubs. Oh, my gosh. And your parents didn't care? They're just like, well, I didn't tell them. Oh. I'm like i'm going so you were like the bad girl oh yeah were you oh yeah oh i was like so good i have like anything breaking the rules i didn't like oh no i broke the rules but i was like still like

good in like my schoolwork and stuff but like you were balanced yeah interesting because you're so like cute and goody now i wouldn't think that you would have been like a bad girl back then no i was i would smoke weed at school in the bathrooms i I was like, nah, but, but like I would do it, but I was still good in class where like my teachers would be like, did you bring pot brownies to class today? So like they, like, like they would like tease me for my stoner self, but like also like I didn't ever get in trouble for it. Wow.

Yeah. Cause you were like, I was like in honors classes, like taking college classes in my high school wow but just smoking weed and having a lot of sex that's kind of your personality now though you're like so smart but also like wild party girl i kind of love it i love that you're a mom and you still have like your like wild personality like you still have the app going you'll talk about anything like i love that i feel like i'm i kind of like subdued myself a little bit i'm like well, well, I'm a mom. I shouldn't say wild things.

I mean, certain things I think are good. I wish that I had a better filter now. I wish I would have started my filter when I was pregnant. Some of the stuff that I say, I was like, I shouldn't have said that. How do you deal with the swearing around your daughter? We have a bleep jar. You do? Okay.

I know that was the hardest thing. It's like, oh my gosh. Because she picks up everything. She's like a year and a half or a year and like one month and she like picks up everything yeah and i'm like oh my god even stuff we say to each other i'm like one day she's gonna repeat this i'm like let's just not say anything because you never know they pick up everything they understand a lot too yeah yeah and i know it's like an uncommon thing but it's like i also am porn so it's like i have phone calls where i'm like talking about porn and gang bangs and anal and i was like that's added to the bleep jar i can't

yeah or like checking the computer anything my whole i thought my last like almost 20 years of my life has been like this so now you're paying that money into your money jar your bleep jar exactly that's my dirty money in my bleep jar. There's a lot of dirty money so who cares? Did you ever act? Did you ever do like mainstream acting? No.

You wouldn't? I couldn't. I feel like I would be like one of those like Matthew McConaughey I play myself. Like I don't think I could play a character.

No, I think it would be so good. I mean it's kind of cliche because I guess porn stars do this as like horror movies. You know? Oh yeah. I feel like they kind of I think I could do

a horror movie but I still feel like I would have a hard time playing a character that's not. That's not you? Not my personality. Well I think people would cast you for someone that's your personality. Maybe you're not Riley Reid maybe you're playing like Danielle or something in there. But it's like your character you know. Yeah. I just yeah. Because even in like porn acting

it's like I played a detective and I'm like fucking kind of. But you're good at it. No. You are always good at it you were always good at acting I mean you commit I watched that I was like wow I could never I would just laugh and giggle I would never be able to we did yeah like how you take it seriously but you do you take it so seriously which is like I think you should be and I think you should do that I feel like that's like your calling because it's like you're so good would you ever do like a real housewives a reality show or anything I would love to be on The Circle.

What is that? Netflix. The Circle. I haven't seen it. Where do Netflix people do it? We do Ultimate and Love is Blind. What is The Circle? The Circle is like, it's like, so you have to be like the most popular and you can be like a catfish in the game.

So you have like an online profile. You're all like in like the house apartment building. But you have a profile and you're either playing yourself or you're playing a catfish, and a lot of people will play the catfish, and you get voted off by being popular and who likes you and who doesn't. A lot of times you're talking to someone,

and I think it's Trisha, but it's actually fucking Moses pretending to be Trisha. Wait, like you're going to change your voice or something? No, no, no. It's just all on DMs. But it's a TV show, so they're filming you typing? No, no, no. It's just like all on like DMs. But it's a TV show, so they're like filming you typing? No, you're like living in the apartment

and you're like, circle, take me to my circle chat. I've never heard of this. It's so good. I'm obsessed with the circle. It's just like random people. Yeah, it's just random people. Oh my god. I follow some of them on Instagram. Really? I was like, oh my god, I love some of them.

Oh my god. And anyone can apply for a different season? I've applied. I don't think I... Wait, oh, my God, I love some of them. Oh, my God. And anyone can apply, like, for a different season? I've applied. I don't think I've, oh, I don't know. Wait, you have applied and they haven't asked you to be on it? No. Oh, my God. I would die to see you on one of those shows. I would.

I've honestly, I even was like, Circle, this gives you an opportunity to, like, let people see how they judge a book by the cover. Are they going to judge me for being a porn star or are they going to accept me for who I am? That is good. That's a good pitch. Netflix, get on it. Right?

Come on, Netflix. Oh, my God. I would watch it. Because at first I was like, what? But seeing you on there, I'm just shocked that they haven't. Oh, my God. What a drop. It's such a fun.

It's my favorite reality show because it's not like the lovey-dovey bullshit type ones. It's like trying to win all the money. Oh, you win money, too. Yeah, you win money too? Yeah, you win $100,000 if you get voted the most popular. Oh, fun. So that's why it's fun. You try to cause drama. You'd be so good at it. Oh, it's tough.

Oh my god. I would only be worried about getting voted off too quickly because I want to cut some drama. That would be so fun. But you have a cuteness to you too, so people want to keep you around. Also, I feel like Netflix would want to keep some drama. That would be so fun. But you have a cuteness to you, too, so people want to keep you around. Also, I feel like Netflix would want to keep you around. The show people would want to keep you around because you're entertaining. Because I wonder if they have a say in it at all.

I don't know. They say sometimes they have a say who's entertaining, keep around, or something. It makes sense. They might keep you around. But I guess if it's winning money, then they probably couldn't do that because then it would be like. But I wouldn't let myself win the money. I would only want to do it.

No, I would want someone else to win. Oh, I don't want to win the money. No. I'm playing the jackpot. I'm like, give me the money. I would only want to do it. No, I would want someone else to win. Oh, I don't want to win the money. No. I play the jackpot. I'm like, give me the money. I want to win it. No, I feel like it's not fair because I make too much money. Right.

And then it's like some of these people are like regular people. We could always donate it if you felt guilty. I don't want to win just to win. I'd be like, I don't want to lose. No, I mean like I'm going to know I won just by being there. On the show, right. On the show, I'm a winner. I like that.

I'm already, I've already've already won i gotta live for that actually you just want to go for the experience yeah i think it'll just be so fun to cause drama oh my god i want to see you on that show drama for no reason i love that oh my god that's why i'm surprised you never did like social media more because you could be so much drama on there but you used to back in the day like in like 2015 days, there was like girls in porn who were just like we're arch enemies. I remember like once posting like my fleshlight next to like a girl I hated to her flesh. She had a fleshlight, but it was like with a company like a knockoff company. So her fleshlight looks all like, you know, not cute.

It's not good. Not good material. Doesn't feel real. Yeah. And then she would always be throwing shade at me. So I would post my fleshlight next to her fleshlight. Be like, which pussy would you rather? Oh, my.

That's my drama, though. I feel like that's cute. Was she into it or no? Oh. Did you actually hate her? What was the drama? What was the beef? She was just not a nice girl.

Okay. Okay. If they're mean, then I get that. She was just like a mean. Yeah, she would like write blog posts being like, all eight of these girls in porn. Oh my gosh. And it was like, you're crazy. Yeah, that's what would scare me about porn is people like judging.

Like when they talk about that, when I had Holly on, she was talking about the play where they mentioned how they'd all have orgies and judge each other's bodies. Like they would like make fun of each other. I know. And I was like, oh my gosh. She was like, yeah, people would like body shame you while you're having sex with you. And I was like, oh my God, that's my biggest fear. And they're all so skinny to get in there.

I'm like, who's body shaming who? That's like my biggest fear. Or especially mine. I had a flush. Like, whoo. It was like crazy. Mine looked insane. Mine was like a little gray tuna fish or something.

No. What do they call like a fupa too? Like a fupa or fatty. I don't know what it is. Yeah, I don't know. It's like, it's squishy and I don't like it. I'm like, God, I see girls, I always talk about this, like with like a, I call it a slot. It's just a slot.

There's nothing there. And I'm like, how wonderful would that be? No, I don't like it. I like there to be some cushion to the push in. Because when you wear a swimsuit, when I wear a swimsuit, you just see there's just so much V. I look like I have balls. Yeah, wait, what? Because I have a fat pussy. You do? So it's like, it looks like. Oh, I see what you mean.

Like thick. Yeah, so it's like, it looks like. Oh, I see what you mean. Like thick. Yeah. Okay. So it's like, it looks like. Some guys are like, what's that? Interesting. You're so tiny. I mean, obviously I've seen it, but I'm just like, oh my God, that's interesting. I guess it's just genetics then.

Yeah. I always think when you say fat, I always just think like you have to be fat to have a fat one. No. That's just, there's extra fat down there. Do you ever, and you never get self-conscious. I get self-conscious of swimsuit. I'm always just like, there's never enough fabric to cover me so i'm always have a little bit hanging out like we

see your vagina i'm like it's just fat it's not my vagina don't worry but you love it i mean honestly you make your like living off your body so you probably have all the confidence in the world i mean i don't have all the confidence in the world but like i've just learned that it doesn't matter what i think it matters what other people think. That is true. And I will tell you, there is something for everyone. I still have a lot of loyal people on my OF that are just so obsessed.

Oh, I've gained so much weight and people like it more. They're like, let's see your belly. I'm like, oh, and then I do it. I'm like, I don't like this because I don't like bellies. I don't like fat bellies. I'm like, but this is what I'm working with.

So this is what we're selling. Although I cover the C-section. That's fair. Wild. C-section scar. Oh my gosh.section score oh my gosh so i'm so excited to watch your journey i'm so excited for pasha's movie i'm so excited for another baby for you i know it's like annoying to hear people like when's next baby but i'm we're so in baby making mode around so i'm like i have another baby i'm excited for us to have a play date i think our

little ladies are gonna like each other oh my god that will be so much fun bring them up we'll come to you i know we're kind of far. You're, like, literally on the opposite end of the world when you said you weren't coming. I, like, had it so far. Oh, no. It's okay. I mean, I'm open. We can come here sometime.

Yeah. We can meet somewhere in the middle. We can go to a park or something. That would be so fun. We should do something. Because I always wonder. I'm, like, when is she? Because we had a birthday for her, too, but it's, like, we only know, like, older kids.

I'm, like, how do they meet these little baby friends? Yeah. It's hard. Just, like, classes. No. We have, like, we just, like, I know just, like, a handful of people who have kids. Yeah. So it's, like, just, like, a few.

There's one friend of mine who I was like, you should meet one of my friends because his son is named Rodeo. No way. And Malibu Barbie. Malibu and Rodeo. I was like, they need to be friends. That's so cute. They're both locations in LA.

That's a cute name. I love crazy names. I love that you went with Emma, though, like a classic name. Because I think in this world, everyone is doing just the craziest names. Like Elon Musk and Grimes, they have the craziest kid names. But Emma's just sweet and cute. Did you name her after someone? No, I just thought it was a really nice name.

I actually wanted to name her Seven. Oh, I love that. Pops did not want to name her Seven, but she was born on the 7th. So I kind of got a little bit of what I wanted. Yeah. Oh, Seven love that. Pops did not want to name her Seven, but she was born on the 7th. So I kind of got a little bit of what I wanted. Yeah. Oh, Seven is cute. See that universe thing working for me? It makes it out.

That is so cute. I love it. Yeah, I didn't have to convince him much on Malibu Barbie. He's like, okay, that's cute. I like it. Did he just respect that it's your baby? He loved it. No, because there were some that I was like, I want sugar.

I want cookie. Like, I love these names. And he's just like, maybe Malibu, because he likes the ocean. So he's like, okay, we'll go with Malibu. I was like, okay. Malib cookie like I love these names and he's just like maybe Malibu because he likes the ocean so he's like okay we'll go with Malibu I was like okay yeah Malibu is a really nice name thanks it's fun I just always wanted that name as a kid like when I was a stripper oh like you wanted that to be your name oh man bring up with Malibu Barbie I would I would I probably lied to people and said my name was Barbie on like planes and stuff and then yeah and then when I was a stripper I had the name 10 and I love that name because

there was a really pretty girl in my class T-E-N oh I love that it was such a good name but I was like god I was a stripper for so many years with that name so i'm like i can't give her that name so i was like yeah that's fair because like i love the name riley but i can't name my daughter riley riley is such a good name and honestly like that's a really good name for a girl it is yeah but i feel like because i know you too then i would think like riley yeah you just associate the name with porn at this point yeah the connection that's what's always hard is like also becoming a mom like i haven't seen lena I had my baby, too. It's always such a weird thing because it's like, oh, I don't know. My porn

life is like, even if it was short-lived, it still feels like whatever. But she has such a baby. She has a baby, too. I mean, not baby. She's like a toddler now. I know. I have to see her, too. She's so tall. She looks like a five-year-old child. Oh, my God. It's crazy. I don't think she's three yet. Yeah, she is like grown. She's tall. Well, because Adam's

tall, too, because Lena's so little and short. I know. I see Lena posting and she's like, next month she's going to be taller like grown. She's tall. Well, because Adam's tall too because one is so little and short. I know. I see one I'm posting and she's like, next month she's going to be taller than me. That's crazy. I know. I know because I know she stopped posting her baby. I guess at a certain age, I guess after one, people stopped posting. Yeah, I think she was saying the same things. Just like comments were not nice and like, and it was like the same thing with us

is like I stopped posting her face because people were posting her Emma's face. Like they were like post her in like an article or a vlog or their YouTube video. Yeah, that's what I don't like. Yeah, I don't like that shit. It's like I stopped posting her face because people were posting her Emma's face. Like they were like post her in like an article or a vlog or their YouTube video. Yeah, that shit I don't like. Yeah, I don't like that shit. It's like I consent to her face being out there, but when they would use it in like drama channels, I'm like I didn't consent for you to use this this way. Yes, that's why I stopped showing Emma's face.

I get like that. It's because people started posting it in other YouTube videos and stuff. Yeah. And I was like no. There should be like laws against that, especially like on like. I agree. Yeah, like when they were posting it on like Reddit and stuff, like don't post, laws against that. Especially, like, on, like. I agree. Yeah. Like, when they were posting it on, like, Reddit and stuff. Like, you don't post it on there.

I agree. The people on there. It's like, I can post. And I agree. And it's, like, just because, like, I'm a celebrity doesn't mean that my child should automatically fall in those. Right. Because it's, like, you release rights once you become a celebrity.

But it's, like, the child should still be protected under those rights. Yeah. They don't consent to being a celebrity. I agree with that. So, like. Yeah. People just make it. Sorry.

It's okay. Our Halloween set is falling apart. Oh, I think I've been like hanging out in the handbag. No, it's a little hand right there. Yeah. I was like, oh my God, it's moving. I'm so happy we reconnected. I hope my daughter's going to have a play date.

We're around literally whenever. I know you guys are very busy. Same. Let us know. Yeah. It would be so great to meet them. I love it. Oh just thank you so much for coming on my podcast I was so happy to reconnect with you I've always loved you and admired you you helped my OF career so much you helped us get this house basically our three our three tapes are still for sale on my OF you can see

when I tag you right because sometimes I think so yeah I always wonder that I'm like god are they probably like why is she still selling this tape from three years ago? You should always be selling that for the rest of your life. And to be honest, your daughter should be then selling it. Oh, yeah. Giving, like, the generational wealth. Like, I plan on all of my porn money to then just, when I die, is going to be what I make the most money. Yeah.

So it better go to my daughter. That's so smart. Right? Keep it going. I wonder how you do that with OF. Maybe you have to sign, like, an agreement. Or give them the login, I guess. Yeah.

I don't know. Like, once you die, do they take it off? Yeah. I could put you in touch with my estate planning person. Oh, you have one? Yeah. I need you do that with OF. Maybe you have to sign like an agreement that some, or give them the login, I guess. Yeah. I don't know. Like once you die, do they take it off? Yeah. I could put you in touch with my estate planning person. Oh, you have one. Yeah. I need to do that. I'm like setting it all up.

Yeah. That's so smart. Cause I really want you to too. Cause I was just like, you know what? This tapes from like three times we met. It's like sponsoring my whole like life, you know? Yeah. Honestly, it should be stuff that like just pays for all of your lives to continue on.

No, it's a smart way to go. Even if it just goes down to like a thousand dollars a month, it's like it's a thousand dollars a month that can be helping her. Oh, for sure. It's something. Yeah. Which is the greatest thing. That's why I do love OF.

And I love this business. And you're very smart. You're very diversified. And I'm so inspired by you. I'm like, I gotta do more stuff. So anyway, this is Riley Reid, everyone. Check her out. She's everywhere.

She's on OF, Read My Lips, Ash Agency, 18 Plus Clothing. She's going to have a cartoon on Cartoon Network. Married with a beautiful baby, so don't slide into her DMs or clashes. And hopefully we'll see you again soon. Yes. Thank you so much for having me. Yay.