Just Trish - Tana Mongeau Exposes DMs From Her STALKER

Episode Date: October 19, 2023

On episode 24 of 'JUST TRISH', Tana Mongeau is BACK for a spooky Halloween special where she exposes DMs from her infamous stalker. Plus, Tana addresses the theory that someone from her team is being PAID to leak her personal information. Then, Trish gets all the tea on Tana's dating life and that heated argument with her 'CANCELLED" cohost, Brooke.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome back! Oh my god, yeah, like let's just do the intro together cause honestly it's not just Trisha anymore. Like I kind of like tricked you into being my co-host like every month I just keep painting. She says tricked me like I would not sneak into your house and beg for this opportunity. I keep, I just want to put this out here

like I was just saying this, it might be a little morbid but if I found out I had one day left to live this would be what I would do with my day. No way, really? Like I'm not even literally kidding you. This is... This was so fun. We did a full, like, glam, and I wanted us to have the same face. I'm like, oh my gosh, I know your glam always plays, but I'm like, oh my god, use my makeup

artist for like a day, because it like... Her makeup artist was everything, too. We have the same face. It's like crazy. We are literally f***ing twins right now. And it's like, no one loves Halloween like you. No, yeah, no one loves Halloween like you. You do, full out. Like, no one loves Halloween like you. You do.

We're living for this. I feel like anyone else, if we made them do this, they would be doing it for us. Oh, for sure. People don't love it. People will do it, but they don't get excited. I get so fucking excited. Where do you think it stems from? I was just getting me immediately saying the same thing, trying to psychoanalyze it.

Do you think it's that we love to be not us? Yes, that's exactly, I like to be anyone but myself. Me. Like I think it's, like growing up I was like I just want to be on movies and TV I don't know who I am, you know what I mean? Oh my god, literally, like right now I am a fembot. I'm in Austin Powers. Yes. I am not Tana Mongeau and it feels great. It's so great. To be a fembot would be so exciting. I've never seen a movie. You don't have to do anything. I've never seen the movie. Well actually I've only seen anything. I've never seen the movie. Well, actually, I've only seen it once when it first came out

and it was horrible. Like, I really do not like Austin Powers. Really? But I love the fembots. I think they're cute. They're so cute. Well, they're like robots, right? That's all they are.

Right? Well, that's, yeah. Like, with no brain or anything. They just like... The ideal woman. Yeah. Exactly. Like, that movie was made by a man.

For real. For sure. I don't find Mike Myers to be that funny. I mean, that's a little, like, scandalous, but I don't think he was, like, that funny. Do you know him? Is he Austin Powers? Yeah.

And he's like Shrek. Oh, my God. I forget how young you are. We're just saying this. You're so young. No, but I love an older reference. I love a like, and not even that's an older reference. That's common.

Everyone my age knows Austin Powers and has seen it. No, he's almost before my time. He did Wayne's World, and I was a kid. I was nine. It was like you weren't even born. I just love a slutty costume. Me too. I don't always do my research.

That's the problem. You just like to wear like a fun costume absolutely I'm the same way but I've never seen like you'd like this you know what I mean usually you're like in your pants and your tan outfit I just like watched it I was like wow you're like gorgeous like you look like a model in person like I couldn't help I was just like oh my god you look so good you're 25 I didn't look like you the thing is is she will gas me like that first of all that's insanely delusional. She is so beautiful. You look stunning. The skin is on glass.

Like, the titties are, everything is giving. You look amazing. Yours are, like, nice, yeah. Well, I told you, I'm stuffed the house down boots. I should have stuffed mine, for sure. I made them so, so much padding into this. You're just padded. Oh, but I'll put a sock in there. I brought socks.

Did you really? I'm such a bra stuffer. I'm so sorry. If the tits don't feel something, I will stuff. Wait, really? Oh, my gosh. And yours are natural right like we were talking about that you never had surgery i've never i had a nose job but like

i would do i want more i it's like fun i hate to say it so you like build a bitch like okay is that a fellow porch song right i just i think she had a different different context it's like the same build a bitch yeah like like hers was all female empowerment mine's like get under the knife your nose is fake yeah my nose is fake oh i didn't know that yeah did you get it for like a deviated septum or something well i would get really bad nosebleeds my whole life like really bad it would bleed out of my eyes and my ears and all this shit and it was like super scary and so i got what yeah like out of my eyes and my ears that was like satanic or demonic like that happens i know isn't that kind of crazy yeah i'd be really scared because you hear that in like

like lore like people like bleeding from their eyes oh my god i've never thought about it like that maybe i am illuminati but maybe it's not a bad thing did jesus bleed from his eyes right no that's my new bed i'm like i'm jesus moses is like stop literally there was maybe something good about bleeding from the eyes. Maybe not. I don't know. Probably not. Probably not.

Okay. And so, yeah. I was such a creepy little kid, too, when I, like, knew it was going to happen. I would, like, I just can't even. That's so weird. And you went to a doctor? Once I got money, I went to a doctor for it. And I cauterized, like, the whole inside of my nose.

And you're supposed to do it, like, every 10 years. So I hope it doesn't start happening again. It looks so good what did you get you got it like what I just got it like like cuter smaller I honestly like I would want a second one like I really would I will yeah and then I paid for a second one and then I had like a worldwide scandal and it was like one of my first scandals so I was like I had to stay home and like skip the surgery because I was like all scared wait you didn't go to the surgery because of the scandal? Because this was before I understood like this too shall pass. I was like, I need to start applying for fucking jobs.

What was it? This was like the I-dubs, like the beginning, like whole, like that whole scandal. And I was like, I should probably stay home and like manage this. And it's funny because now like I would just get the damn nose job. Oh, for sure. I would have gotten the nose job even more because I'm like, it doesn't matter if I die. Because like everyone hates me anyways, you know? And that is how I felt mentally. And it's like. Oh, for sure. I would have gotten the nose job even more because I'm like, it doesn't matter if I die because, like, everyone hates me anyways, you know? And that is how I felt mentally.

And it's like, damn, you know what I mean? I could have just been, like, hopped up on the drugs, not even paying attention to the Twitter trending. Totally. I used to get surgery when I didn't care if I, like, lived because I was just like, well, if I, like, whatever. Now I'm, like, more scared because I have stuff to live for. So I'm like, I'm a little nervous to get surgeries.

But back then. Wait, but that's crazy because you must feel so, like, vindicated, right? Because he apologized to you. So you're just kind of kind of like wow do you feel so good about that I think it's kind of like it happened so much like later in time yeah that I was like when it happened I was like I just woke up and I was like this is funny like like not funny but like what's the word I was like oh my god he apologized like no way like you know what I mean like wow this feels like there was definitely a time in my life where I was like that like seeing that apology would like meant the world to me like and now I was just like oh that's really cool he's grown as a person

I've grown as a person and I've like just it's all past scandals especially that one though like I look back and I'm like I wouldn't change anything I think it's like I really I think I needed that at the time for different reasons like I I think it was like, you know, it was a really good quick humbling at the beginning of my career. And I, I just imagine if I hadn't had that, I would have been like on my high horse and just a completely different person. Really? What do you think?

Like it just, what did it change in you? Like what was it? Um, the reminder that all of this like can go away. It was like the first time, like really realizing that, you know what I mean? And the reminder that like, you know what I mean? like you could fuck up and have to grow in front of the whole world and that feels like falling on a stage in front of like you know what I mean like it's awful that feeling but like as much as it was an awful feeling I think sometimes the best lessons like come from that and it just like it really and it just taught me a lot about like growth

and acknowledgement of like oh like I like sometimes you need to look in the mirror and, like, be better and, like, show that, you know? That's good. Honestly, that's good because that's what I always say about cancellations, too. It's, like, sometimes you just, like, need to hear it because you don't maybe know. How old were you? You were, like, young. I think I was, like, 18, but I don't know. I think I was 18.

See, when you're so young, too, I always feel bad for people, like, 18, 19, because that's, like, the years you do, like, say, the dumbest stuff. Oh, my God, yeah. But also the stuff he was talking about was like before you were 18 right like yeah it was like way before like i was still i hadn't dropped out of high school yet so i had to have been a either like eighth grade going into freshman year like just right so you're so young that's us on the internet and then some guy is doing this like an 18 year old and i was like oh my god who's just trying to start out like and it's cool like i don't i didn't know the whole situation really but like i was like oh that must feel so good like for, even if like 20 years from now someone apologized for like treating me poorly,

I'd feel like relieved almost. Like, wow, that's so nice. Even if you let things go. I was just like really like this is like insane. And like it's something I never thought I would be saying or thinking. Me saying this is like a fembot is so funny because it's going to get clipped. Anything serious. That's my favorite about the Halloween episodes though.

Like dressing up and then she gets clipped seriously. And it's like she's a fembot the Halloween episodes though, like dressing up and then she gets clipped seriously. And it's like, she's a f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing f***ing Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, but like, I was genuinely really happy for him. Yeah. Like, I was just like, it seems like he's just like in such a good place mentally.

And like, I didn't know what place he was at at that time. So I don't really, I don't have much to say about that. But I was like, you know. I always feel like that they're probably not like at the best place. Like when people just like come for other creators like that for like kind of no reason. You guys were like in separate fields and like the stuff happened like so long ago. Yeah. Like, you know, I kind of feel like they almost do that to like, especially a guy coming for

a girl, especially a young girl. It's like that. It's always kind of like a little ick. It's kind of like, why are you doing this? And so to me, it's always like maybe they wanted to, I don't know. I don't know. I definitely had so many points in my career where I was just coming for people left and right for so many different reasons now looking back and like, you know what I mean?

So, I mean, I could see that. I don't know what place he was in about this actually on the hot topics this week we're saying like you're you don't really have beefs with people right like every drama is like centered around you like stuff that you've done like tana con or like those kind of things you know what i mean it's never like you're beefing with people right that's actually like i've never thought about that like a lot of my biggest scandals are just me being a dumbass. You talking about the wine lady. I'm like, just shut up, Tana. Like, oh my God.

Like, don't have that convention. Like, don't get fake married. Oh my God. But you were so young. The convention is like anybody at like 20 or however old you were, like be like, yeah, I would love a convention of myself. Like. Yeah.

Yeah. And I was just so spiteful to VidCon. I would do anything at that time. Like, you will, you will see. And you were able to do it. Most people can't. You know what I mean? Do it.

Do it's in question. You did something. I did something for sure. I still think that's somewhat impressive. You know what I mean? But you're the same way. Did they? I don't know.

No one died. No one died. Thank God. Seriously. Was it Fire Island or something? Wait, did they? What happened? Tell me.

You keep slamming the shit out of your ear. Oh my God. Island or something? Wait, did they? What happened? Tell me. Oh my God. Wait, really? Oh my God. Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry. That's literally how excited I am. I'm like kicking and screaming.

Is it bad? It's fine. Okay. Just don't do it again. Dude, Moses is so real for that. I didn't hear it either. I was like, oh my gosh. Okay. Can you see our shoes or no?

If you can't see our shoes and for all of the audio listeners, I feel really sorry because they are so- Can you see your shoes? Can you see her shoes? Maybe pull your shoes in the middle. Can you do it this way? Both of our straight tans on our feet. Maybe a little questionable.

Mine's far worse than Trisha's. This straight tan is so bad. No. Actually, yours are good. Mine are whatever. No, but it's camp. Yeah. I think it's-

You know what I mean? I love this new word, camp. It's like when you're a mess. You're like, no, you're camp. I love it. Dude, Ari gets on my ass. I'll be like, that's so camp when you like go to the grocery store with like your lash on your face. He's like, that's not camp. What is camp? I don't know. Do we know? What is like the, what is the actual definition of camp?

Camp? They had a Met Gala that was camp. Yes. And no one was camp apparently. I remember that. Everyone's like, no one's camp. And they're like, I'm like, I would've gone, I would've gone in my KFC uniform. I feel like that's camp. know what i mean so camp is that camp right only because i just did that magazine cover you saw where i was like in a kfc outfit and like oh it's camp and i'm like okay is camp like glamorizing like i think camp is low budget i think like buffalo sauce on gray sweatpants is camp like but it's not it's not but i'm like this is so are you a stain girly i'm oh my god do you eat like non-messy? No, I'm very messy. I get stains on everything.

I get stains on everything. I get stains on everything. A white t-shirt is my worst nightmare. Oh yeah. Like actually my worst nightmare. Yeah, I get stains on literally everything. But I don't really eat like sauces. So I don't do it.

I don't know how I get stains. I get like butter and stuff on me and like. Everything. Everything. Butter, spray tan, makeup. Like I'm staining everything always. But you're camp. I think you're camp.

I think you're camp. Have you been invited to the Met Gala? No, Trisha. I swear to God, I want to like lobotomize her to like have a real like adaptation of who I am. You would be invited. Like you are definitely the biggest right now. Like I feel, well, you've been the biggest for so long, right?

Noah's bigger. Giving in. I'm just banging the microphone. And she like really thinks this. It's so funny. No, it's true. That's why I'm like, how many times do you want to come on? Come on every week, please. Like it's so great. This is my Met Gala. That's all I need to say. It's so funny. No, it's true. That's why I'm like, how many times do you want to come on? Come on every week, please.

Like, it's so great. This is my Met Gala. That's all I need to say. This right now is my Met Gala. Because who has a bigger influence than you than, would you think right now? Addison Rae,

Charli D'Amelio, Noah Beck, Dixie D'Amelio. Oh, okay. Do you know them? You know them, right? You just said you were at a party with all of them.

I heard it when we were glamming. You said you were like at a party with them? Yeah, we were at, oh um this girl tate mccray have you seen her she makes that song like the show how does this song go zach sang was there zach saying what oh yeah i just because i saw him on the story okay so she had like a little she had a show when i went and like all the little influencers were there and stuff but olivia rodrigo was there and i was trying to stalk her down you guys love olivia rodrigo too love so

much i don't really know much about her. My co-host loves her. He always talks about her. I love a lyricist, you know? Like, I just love, like, you know what I mean? Like a pop bitch who's, like, writing her own shit. Okay. She does.

Is she, like, a Taylor Swift or something? Yes, very much so. Like, writing her own stuff. Like, yeah, boys. Didn't you guys have, you guys had beef. You and Olivia. Didn't you, like, she had a song, right? And then you were, like, dating the guy that she wrote the song about? No, no, no, no, no. You're mixing up. You and Olivia. Didn't you like, she had a song, right? And then you were like dating the guy that she wrote the song about?

No, no, no, no, no. You're mixing up timelines. The vampire. No, vampire. We sat on canceled who we think it was about. Okay. Who's my friend. Okay.

But you're not dating or anything? No, no, not at all. Okay. But you were like, but you were upset about it or no? Am I getting this wrong? Okay. Okay. I don't know.

I thought it was like beef. You were like so close. I hear little bits and pieces like Olivia Rodrigo and Tana and she knows I love that she knows everything no and we were trying to like like I've never met her or talked to her I've talked about her like a lot on canceled and stuff and I like you know how that goes like when you talk about someone a bunch yeah and you love them yeah but it's like it's gonna go one of two ways where they like love it or they're like oh my god can that like crazy ass bitch just shut up

about me. Oh yeah. You know. That's why I never like talk to anybody because I'm just assuming they don't want me to talk about them. Yeah. Please don't associate with me. And then here we are always talking about everyone. Everyone. And it's like. Yes. They're like stop. And they either love it and they're so down for it or they're just like what. Yeah like don't do that. Yeah. Oh but I feel like she's probably chill. Like she probably loves you

guys. Like you guys are the same vibes and era. I think. I hope. I don't know. I really don don't know but you didn't even go up to her because i know lila went up to her and like made a tiktok with her and yeah i was like holding her at gunpoint it was honestly not literally she just like what was she down to do it was like okay she was super down exactly like olivia was super super sweet about it but i was like cut the shit but that's why like i love people like lila who just like do whatever you know what i mean it could be that way I know I get so embarrassed to ask anyone for anything same that is one thing I'm really bad about and I feel like people wouldn't know that about you and I because I feel like they would think we would be the opposite yeah especially because

I feel like you're so out there like you're more out on the scene than I am so I feel like you would just be that person to be like give me a few shots and like I'm a little more inclined to ask someone to do something but like I really do like I don't know like I just feel so bad inconveniencing people like in their own environment and scared of if they like don't want the association right you know oh my god you were we don't have to say who and we won't even give any clues but we were saying there's like an influencer who didn't like want to

be in a video with you and I was just like yes that's wild you said they told you that to your face just like I can't be in a video with you I was like I would be mortified I would just like never leave my house again yeah it was actually it was so it was really crazy. It's like this, she's a huge influencer and we were like out at a party and she was with like all of her friends and all of her friends and I were taking a photo together and they were like asking her to get in it.

And she was like, oh, that's not good for my brand. And I was like, that's wild. And then she'll like call me blackout drunk and be like, what's the party? Like, where should I go? And I'm like, do you like, that was the thing. It was very, it's like a lot of people will do that to me where they're like, no, I really like you and I want to hang out with you, but I couldn't be in a photo with you. And I'm like, oh, come on.

That's the grossest thing. I hate that. As if they're like better than you on some level or a different brand. And also like her brand is not like that squeaky clean. It's not like she has this like, yeah, at all. I was just like, wait, that's so weird. It was. It did catch me by surprise. And I, things like that, I all. I was just like, wait, that's so weird. It was. It did catch me by surprise.

And I, things like that, I will just, like, never forget. Yeah. And it's so interesting to me. Like,

I don't, that one just did catch me by surprise. I don't know. Like, I would feel horrible. I'd feel so bad. I'm not saying you have to sit here and, like,

come on the cancel podcast and hold my hand in a paparazzi photo. But, like, in the back of a selfie at a party that people are texting to someone, like, your brand's not that fucking serious. Oh, no, that's why those people i'm like ick all the way it's like it definitely it made me sad because i like that person and i was like oh my god honestly i still like that person like i'll watch their content you know like you're the most forgiving though

you are the most forgiving person i feel like you i think it was on brooke's vlog you guys got a fight and then like literally like five minutes later she's like we're good now i was like wow you guys forgive each other so easily what were it even about because i watched it like 20 times there's like only like a minute in the blog i'm like i can't even hear you're in the background saying something we cut out like we cut out the like major fight okay i mean we really like we fight like sisters or like even like a toxic relationship sometimes like how do you do that they fight and they're like over it you know what i mean exactly like and it's just you know what i mean things will just like escalate a little too quickly sometimes.

You know what I mean? Can you say like general what it's about? Yeah. I mean, well, we were just fighting over a bunch of the logistics of like tour. Oh. Like touring with each other. People don't realize that when you tour with someone, it's like how close the quarters are. It's so hard.

Like you are up each other's assholes. Yeah. Like 24, 7 and you're like living out your day and like we we just couldn't be more opposite on the way that we would want to do things like in brooke's ideal world she's at the venue an hour early and in my ideal world i'm at the venue in the literal minute i have to be there which is going to stress her out and then it's like and then the way we just express things like emotionally is also very different like all more like want you know like to converse about it and brooks you know a little more like high energy about it like you know what i mean and like so just trying

to like work things out like that and like figure out like how are we going to do this as a unit like it's it's literally like a like a marriage like we have to like compromise on so many things of the way that we both are and get to that 50 50 and you know what I mean and so just in the beginning of tour it was a lot of us like butting heads and whatever and that day it ended up just being so funny because that day it was like Brooke was like annoyed at me and I was annoyed at her over a bunch of tour logistics that are now like worked out but she kept taking out her annoyance on me by making jokes about the shorts I was wearing. They were, like, jean shorts, like, jorts.

Oh, that's what it was. Okay. I was like, wait, what? The jorts. And it's so funny because I always clown, like, my friends for being like, take a f***ing joke. Because we're all very, like, hard-headed. Like, just, like, you even just see the way we interact. Like, we, like, come for each other's necks and it's funny.

So, like, I never, I never get mad about shit like that. But it was, like, the first time maybe literally ever literally ever ever i was like if you make one more comment about my jords bitch like we like we almost killed each other right so it's just like a tipping point yeah and then just later that night we were like honestly this is so funny like we just have to talk about it like let's just podcast about it and it was and then we just worked out all the tour logistics and now things are like pretty good. And it wasn't that serious. Because I read the comments. Because I was trying to figure out what happened.

And everyone's just like, I can't believe Tana would say that to her. And I was like, wait, what did you even say? We were literally texting about it last night. We were like, damn, like, people. You know what I mean? Yeah. And then there were so many, too, that were just, like, nice. And, like, get the sisterly vibe. Yeah.

And, like, just, you know what I mean? Like, it wasn't even dramatic. Yeah, she, like, posted it and stuff. And you guys were fine. So I was like, obviously, it's okay. Yeah, like, if she's posting it, like, exactly. Like, if it was really f***ing serious, it would never have made it to a vlog. Like we're calling it Jorts gate for Christ's sake.

If it was a serious fight. Yeah. You know what I mean? It like, it started as something a little serious, like work-wise, but then we just worked it out. And at the end of the day, it's so funny. But I love it in the middle of the fight. You even like, cause you were like off camera and then you like come into camera to be like

saying, you said something and I was just like, oh, well she's like, it can't be that bad. Or she's like in the vlog. I would have been like tearing the camera like off camera then you like come into camera to be like saying you said something and i was just like oh well it can't be that matter she's like in the vlog i would have been like tearing the camera off right yeah no we had a full videographer on us the entire time we're shooting like a tour documentary so the full fight will be aired are you gonna try and sell it to like netflix or something the goal is to try and sell it but i feel like knowing me i'm gonna get picked up by like 2b or peacock at the most 2b's a vibe right suddenly they had the movie about Amber Heard and Johnny Depp like three months

after it was out. Did you see that? I saw it. Where actors are playing them. No. It's so bad. It came out like three months after the trial.

It's like the worst movie you've ever seen. Who's playing Amber Heard? Like random people. No. They're kind of good. The way I would have auditioned for that.

It was everything. It was like literally such a quick turnaround and it's on 2B I think. Suddenly, I'm not even kidding you, 2B, if you're watching, listening, seriously, please. You should probably get on Netflix. I feel like they buy documentaries. They do?

I don't know. I don't even know. I would love that. Just so you're on a billboard. Is it the drama of the tour? You're just like me, for real. I love a billboard. I love a billboard.

I was like, can I just have a billboard? All the Spotify bitches get billboards. They always get billboards. I was like, can I just have a billboard? All the Spotify bitches get billboards. They always get billboards. Yeah. I was like, how? Spotify didn't want me. Are you ever just driving down Sunset and you see some random motherfucker that you know, like influencer type shit on a billboard and you're just like, god damn it. Yeah.

Why isn't that me? Well, you've had billboards. You've been there. But we both have. You bought a billboard for yourself. I bought a billboard. I bought a billboard for myself as well. Wait, for what?

When I turned 21, I bought a billboard on Sunset. Oh, MTV did that. You did that? No. MTV did do. They did ones. They did ones. But they were different ones. 21, I bought the billboard on Sunset. Oh, MTV did that. You did that? No, MTV did do. They did ones. They did ones. But they were different ones. Okay.

I bought a slutty one. I love the buying the bill. I did too. I had like chicken fingers on mine. I just put like my ass. Trisha Paytas. Literally same. All mine said was Tana turns 21.

Had my ass in the air. Was it on Sunset? Yeah, it was on Sunset. Yeah. And it was across the street from my favorite nightclub at the time. So I like thought it was so funny that like if anyone like hated me and they went to the club and as they were leaving, like they see it I did that too I had one of me and Fabio set up next to like someone I used to date and I was just like oh now you have to see me

every day no it's so and it was me and Fabio like in bed it is so it's great it's underrated they got more expensive though yeah because it used to only be like five thousand right so what are they now I don't even know so much more like twenty 20,000, 25,000, 30,000. During quarantine, we looked to buy a billboard and I remember it was like 20,000. I was like, okay, that's a little much. Yeah. They're so pricey now. I wanted to do it for something.

I don't remember. It's so expensive. And then I was like, this is such a funny out of touch conversation. Like no one relates to it at all. I feel like people don't know you can buy billboards because you would see people on billboards and like, wow, how can they do that? And I feel like people don't understand that you should buy. You just find a billboard guy.

Literally. Like just like people magazine, you can like buy like, um, like people don't understand that you just like buy you just find a billboard guy literally like just like people magazine you can like buy like um like placement like for your engagement photos I always see people engaged in people and I'd be like people doesn't care and they just like pay for it so it's like really only people does that I think everything else you can like um no way you can pay for anything actually probably not like vogue or something but I think you can pay for any damn yeah you can pay for a lot of magazines I know a lot of girls in LA who do that yeah I've never done it but maybe you should i know honestly we're just in fembot costumes in a magazine next month mind your business mind your business if you'll see that you can you can

be on like vogue dubai or something and you can buy that cover i'm buying the cover of dubai tomorrow okay literally not kidding that would be everything that's so oh my god we should do it i've seen girls do it like just random girls and i'm just like wow, that's so cool. And because my glam people had told me, they're like, oh yeah, you can just like buy those covers. And I was like oh, that's so cool. We should do it. Okay, yeah. You and me. I don't know for what, but we just need to do it. What do we dress as? Just like little like, I guess you don't have to dress like you're in Dubai. No, imagine we're like

so sophisticated, that's even funnier. Oh, like in like suits? Like turtlenecks and all, yeah. Like biz, we're onto something. It's so brewing, but the idea's there. I look horrible in a turtleneck because I have such a big head so i just like pop out so do i i just like to be a slut yeah it's just better to show off your body i haven't shown off my body in like literally so long and you look so good i get so like when we were doing pictures like oh my god i don't know about this no i'm obsessed i'm not even kidding you look amazing i used to love being sexy i used

to love dressing sexy all the time and i don't know like something hits you i think maybe after 30 we're just like really yeah we're like maybe i like maybe I'm not. Maybe not 30. Maybe my age 35. I'm so surprised that you think that way though because you're literally so hot. I get so self-conscious. I don't know. I feel so sorry for everyone who loves you and hasn't met you in person. Oh my gosh. I'm not.

I'm literally actually not even kidding. I always think people would be disappointed because I think people think of me as one way and I'm like. Don't you agree? It's like everything. Like meeting her in person. Really? Like it's just.

It's so. Well. Your guys' energy brings it out but I can be like super quiet and people always think like it's something wrong or something like that. Like people in real life. Yeah, because I get really like, kind of like you, I get like a little paranoid. Like when I go to Target, when I go anywhere. So I can be a little standoffish, especially when people first say hi to me.

I'm very like, hi. Like I'm very, because I don't know how to be. I guess that's true. We have like a mutual trust of knowing that like we can tell each other T and have the same amount to lose as well. And like, and we love each other, but I'm just saying we're so paranoid that like you need tell each other t and have the same amount to lose as well and like and we love each other but i'm just saying we're so paranoid that like you need that too at first you know yeah and you're like the one person too like that you've been through so much so many scandals cancellations all this like that and it's always like she says it like this yeah

because i think like cancellations it's kind of like it's a stupid term like i get it like you said like i kind of love being like canceled because I can like grow from it but like it's not like a real term like there's some people who are just like awful like did you hear the sniper wolf situation

no tell me wait what what's the tea she docs to Jack's films she like showed up to his house did you guys not hear this will you rise with the sun

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Wait, what? This was our hot topic. I love that you're not on a trip. I have definitely hit an accidental dox a couple times in my career by accident. No, it definitely wasn't accidental. She's like filming outside his house and was like, hey guys, pulling up to Jack's film's house. Like, what should I do? Because they have like beef, I guess, which I did not know either. But he's been making videos about her for the past year saying she steals content.

You know Cypherwoof. Oh, shit. You know Cypherwoof. And you know Jack's films. Yes. Okay, so I didn't even know they had this beef, but it was this crazy thing. It's been beef. She's called him a stalker in the past, all this stuff like that because he makes so many videos about her. Calling someone

a stalker and then showing up to their house is so funny. And then when she got caught... That's some shit I would do. That's some shit I would do to my own damn stalker. I can't believe you ever heard that. And then when she got caught, she called him like a freak. She was this freak or whatever. I'm just like, girl, you showed up to the house. And anyways, I guess we looked it up. Doxing is illegal in LA. You can't just show up to

California. And it's also against YouTube's own service. Right now he's trying to get her channel to peak now. But SniperWiff is the biggest YouTuber. She gets 3 million views a video. And she makes that ad sense. And they promote her and all this stuff like that. It's this big thing right now where it's like, why isn't she getting demonetized?

And it wasn't accidental. It was literally like, I'm outside his house. Should we talk? Come talk like adults like so can we have our monetization back please thank you yeah wait wait did you get demonetized i've been demonetized forever what yeah why i feel like i look at monetization on youtube as like when it happens it's like a fun surprise gift yeah you know what i mean totally like you can't rely on it. No, for sure that. You have to like have other things. For the most part. And I've just noticed it.

Like even with like Jeff, like his episodes will never get flagged. And then if I'm in them, like our episode will get flagged and then 10 more of his episodes will. Can I tell you? Yes. For some reason,

the only episodes that get flagged are with you. I know. Which is weird. And then even the last one with Jeff too. Even the last one we like censored. We're like, okay, we'll censor like words and stuff like that. You know what I mean? Or cut things that are too much. I think it's like deadass, my name. I'm not even joking you. No, it's kind of weird that you said that. And I literally don't care because like you said, monetization is like a bonus almost. But it's one of those things where I'm like, that's kind of odd because we've had crazier conversations and stuff like that. So I was like, that's so weird. No, it is. Oh my God. It grinds my gears. it grinds my gears it grinds my gears i'm shocked because like youtube kind of promotes you too like when you've done like vidcon and stuff they kind of promote you right like i've always had like a decent relationship with youtube streaming

awards you're like streaming like all of that stuff i like susan the fucking ceo show isn't so nice to me like all that type of shit but i am just my name i think is like perma perma red flag so bizarre and also because you do get a lot of views on your podcast that's actually really bizarre it's so weird it is kind of crazy I'm lucky like the people who want to listen

are listening because like I don't know how often we're getting like right and you get like brand deals and stuff so you do it in fine with other stuff but it is weird

I always thought that too because I was like wow that's so odd like just these and so like with the Jeff one too we're just like okay we'll just like

censor it and then it was like completely censored and anyways it doesn't matter you're a good time I like yeah I have fun

I have a great time that's what's more important I always think too is just to be like you know it's then it was like completely censored and anyways it doesn't matter you're a good time i like yeah i have fun i have a great that's what's more important i think too it's just to be like you know it's better to be entertaining than censored oh to be foreign monetized it'd be crazy i wasn't like because you were too in like the beginning before like the adsense like apocalypse right monetized yeah oh yeah i used to make so much off adsense and then but mine wasn't i don't think i got hit by the i think maybe i get hit because i don't get demonetized i just don't give you so i get like no money there's oh but you get monetized yeah damn wait i don't think i've ever been occasionally demonetized knock on wood i don't think i've ever been that's not one wait what's what i don't know this is oh no i'm a carpenter but i've never like because that's

like a serious thing if they demonetize you like i wonder why you got yeah it's it really is like i dead ass think like my name that's like the way they demonetize you like i wonder why you got yeah it really is like i dead ass think like my name like the way they demonetize words like like tan emotional is on that same list oh really oh my god i didn't know i had no idea that's good that could be a very real thing because like they changed the you know terms of service way back when the ad pack up so i started changing my content and i deleted a lot too yeah i don't know because i know you used to do wild ones too like the toothbrush one oh my god where are in that video? Can we just talk about this, Trisha? I'm really so young. Yes.

I just made a TikTok about this the other day, but like no one fucking saw it. Of course, it's like whenever I want people to see a TikTok, that's never the one that's going to like get the views. You know what I mean? Yeah. I, the toothbrush thing will forever live with me. Like I swear to God right now, like, like at least once a month, someone's going to come up to me and they're going to be like, he fucked me with a toothbrush, right?

They're going to quote that video. And so many people think that that's what happened. Like someone fucked me with a month, someone's going to come up to me and they're going to be like, he fucked me with a toothbrush. They're going to quote that video. And so many people think that that's what happened. Like someone fucked me with a toothbrush. Right. Yeah. The entire YouTube video is me telling a story about how a guy in high school spread a rumor that he fucked me with a toothbrush and he didn't. Right. And so it's like I made this whole video to try to like empower women and be like, listen, like one day you can narrative back like if a rumor spread about you and then he just got what he fucking wanted tenfold

now for the next decade people are gonna say that to me it's not i just i just gave up iconic that's like your iconic meme i'm just gonna start i'm i'm going along with it it's so good because like it's just that like you screaming it is just so ingrained in everyone's like brain and it's like i wore a red lip that day it was great If I could go back in time and change one thing about that, I would have wore a nude lip. Wait, why? Red lip looks so good on you. I love when you wear a red lip. Really? Yes, I think it looks so good on you. Were you young though? You were young.

I'm going to start letting her get in my head and I swear to God I'm going to be doing it. She's so nice to me. Very few people can pull off a red lip. I think you look so good with it. Wait, that's crazy. Because did you wear one before? Were you Marilyn or something? How does she know this? I don't recall everything. Usually I know. I'm like, wait, I remember you said this. I was like, boof Maryland last year.

Like, I didn't really like, do it. Like, you know? Yeah, you just didn't like, go all out. Like, I just bought like, a little party city dress and like, curled my hair and shit. That's the way to go. Were you going to a party? Yeah, Jeff and I went out as Maryland and JFK. So good. I really wanted to be a slutty president. Like, I wanted to be slutty JFK. How would you do

that? Like, lingerie, JFK mask, like, American flag to a party. Okay, love that. And then I was like, I just felt like it just was screaming cancellation for some reason. I think if, like, the president's, like, dead, it's okay. Wait, really? Because everyone was telling me that it was, like,

I don't know. Just, like, two brain cells bon. It's just like two brain cells bonking off a wall like no one knows. But like everyone was saying because of like his death, like they were saying like doing a live president

and that would be fine. Oh yeah. Maybe because of the way he died. I feel like if he died of old age, I have no idea. I'm honestly the worst ass when it comes to being respectful. I don't know.

Like I just don't do things because I'm like, I don't know. It's so funny because everyone that's like, like I wanted to be something else for Halloween a couple days ago and I couldn't decide if it was cancelable. What was it? I wanted to be Michael Jackson

but I didn't know if that's like if I could be Michael Jackson or not. Are you carrying a baby with you or is it just Michael Jackson? Like are you going to dangle a baby? No baby. That's hilarious though. See I'm playing shit funny. I got cancelled. I did it on my balcony because I just thought it was kind of funny. Not my real baby.

No! A doll! And people cancel me for a doll. I mean, it's a doll. Okay, if it was Malibu, that'd be wild. Wait, see, and I think shit like that. I love a rogue iconic. Cancel me. I'm sorry. Whatever. Because it's memorable. This baby didn't get hurt. You know what I mean? He did it with a real baby.

Right. Well, but then again, it's like people okay okay okay but what were you gonna go what Michael Jackson were you gonna be I don't I don't even know I just can't stop doing that thing where you go on your tippy toes and put your hand on your head like I can't stop like grabbing my crotch I can't stop like imitating Michael Jackson I don't know why that's so random all of a sudden were you a fan when he was alive no I mean sure but not really not like a super fan no not at all. I just, it's like my weird little, like, I just get these weird little, like, tics. Like, that I love doing.

I used to go to Michael Jackson's house. I talk about it all the time. Like, I used to, like, stalk him. And, like, that's why people were coming to my house. I was condemning Sniper Wolf two minutes later. I was, like, nine. But still, yeah. But trust me, I got my, like, karma.

Because people used to show up to my house. I was like, okay, this is awful. Yeah. Would, like, Neverland Ranch, is that where you would go? Yeah, in Los Olivos. Yeah, we would stay outside his house. But it was really guarded. It was like, there's no way.

That's so fun, though. Yeah, because people said he would come out and say hi to people. And as a nine-year-old, you're just dreaming. You're so excited. Yeah, it was cool. We did get to meet him a couple times. And I loved Michael Jackson. You met Michael Jackson?

What was he like? Nice. Just really nice. I was young. I was nine, so I don't remember too much. They thought you Jackson? Mm-hmm. What was he like? Nice. Like, just really nice. Like, I was young. I was, like, nine, so I don't remember too much. I watched so much. Yeah. Well, I wanted to marry him, so I thought maybe he would, like, you know, want me, but

I don't know. I don't think he wanted me. As a fembot. As a fembot. I know. People are going to quit this. Like, hey. But I love that you're in your Michael Jackson era, so you don't know what outfit you're

going to wear. Well, I was going to say that. The tiptoes might be, like, want to be starting something. Like, who is on his tiptoes? Was that like off the wall or something? What's on his tiptoes? I don't know. I really don't know.

But I was like trying to think if it was like, I didn't know if it was a scandal or not. And I was like, who do I call? Because most people will call their other influencer friends. And I'm like, I would call Trisha or Jeff. Both would tell me to do it. Would Jeff tell you to do it? Oh, for sure. Oh.

He's like worse than us. Really? He's like, who fucking cares if you to do it? Oh, for sure. Oh. He's, like, worse than us. Really? He's like, who fucking cares if you get canceled? Do what you fucking want. But I feel like Jeff has, like, does he have just, like, a lot of money from something that he doesn't care, like, about life? No. I feel like he has, like, so much money he doesn't care about anything.

He has a good amount of money, but, like, the way every time he puts his card into, like, an ATM, I'm, like, looking, too. Oh, do you know? Do you know what's... He showed someone, Sophia, he showed his bank account, too. Oh, did he? I don't watch it, but it said, like, just sewing. Oh, I saw that thumbnail. I didn't see that. I don't know. to oh do you know do you know what he showed someone a Sophia he showed his bank account too I didn't watch it but it said like just so we I didn't see that I don't know I don't actually know like what's literally sitting in there but I want to know what's in his bank account

I want to know what's in everyone's bank account I think he's just as like kind of like us like obviously you and I have said we have much more to live for now and I think he does as well but like a part of that mentality never goes away when you were like a who cares like I don't give a liver die like though I feel like there will always be a part of you inside that can like channel that energy. You know what I mean? And I feel like it's like the same vibe.

He's just like, yeah, well, it's interesting. Cause I was like, he seems, he also seems older. Like when I, when he was here, I was like, he seems kind of like older, just like the way he is, you know, like his vibe, everything, but he's not gonna dress up with you this year. I'm, I'm getting close. Barbie Ken. To the, the convincing is actually crazy. Like I have this man at gunpoint, but it's like, that's the thing is that's always my life.

Like it's just me every year convincing straight men to do the crazy shit for Halloween. The fact that you can get these guys to do it. You're like the Ariana Grande of like Halloween costumes. Like you can get men to do whatever you, they want. You know what I mean? If they don't want to do it, you can make it happen. But I, I can't, I've been trying so hard to get him to do a roller skating Barbie. But I honest to God think his, like, and good for him for finally putting his foot down.

No. You know, I'm serious. No. Like, I think this is the first time he's ever been like, I am not doing that. Why? But he is able to do the fur one. I get it. So which one would you be?

Because, like, fur coat Ken doesn't really have a Barbie. I know. That's what, see, I was literally just saying this. I know. Because which one would you be because like fur coat Ken doesn't really have a Barbie I know that's what this see I was literally just saying this you get me the cowboy outfits go together the rollerblade outfits go together I know it's so hard but you really need to be and the thing is is I feel like I could get some other like TikTok boy to do any of them right but it's like I feel like the people want me and Jeff to do something that I would almost rather forsake the roller skating for like you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I've waited out. I've waited out the cloud. I've waited out that. Like what, how can we, what's the plan? How do you convince him? Like what's your tactic? Oh, just relentless. I won't shut the up about it. Every

gaslight manipulating tactic you can possibly think of. You can't like cook a meals for a month or something like that. I feel like it's more just like really like I would do anything for you and you won't even do this for me. Like. Yeah. But then he'll be like you're gaslighting me. And I'm like. What? That's more like manipulating or something.

Both. All of it. I don't know. I don't know these terms. I'm really bad with it. I'm trying it all. I was definitely trying to gaslight him into it. Like a couple weeks ago.

And he was like you're literally gaslighting me right now. I thought gaslighting is like when something didn't happen. And you're telling someone it did. I could be wrong. Me not even knowing what it means is crazy. Right? Is that right? I don't know.

But like there is no but you're right like there's like a specific i was not gaslighting was when you tell someone like that didn't happen and then you're like like you're telling a story like that never happened but it did oh shit emotional blackmail i don't use that term enough yeah no one i'm not but you're gonna even have time because your days are all booked with shoots like dude october's just nuts and you know how it is like i think people don't realize, we were talking about this earlier, but like Paige was equating this to like literally a wedding day the way Halloween is. It's like six hours in hair and makeup and like I'm booking all these sets and people

to dress up with me and props and I want my stylist and everyone to find the exact matches and then if you can't, like the photoshopping people. It's like I really take it seriously and now people just expect that of me yes and it's like adding all of that on top of a regular schedule October's we always say like the end products are so fun like this is so fun so fun yeah like I live for this moment right now but like getting to do it all it's always just the month is like it's hell like you don't sleep and it's just 12 hour days of me trying to like do my regular schedule. And like November 1st, like I'm going to breathe so hard.

Yeah. Until like the next thing. Then you're like, I got to do this. Yeah. I have another tour coming. You'll do something where it's like something busy. But October is crazy because it's like I'm touring and like it's just it's unmatched. And because before you came here, you did a photo shoot. You said you did like Kim in Paris or something.

Yes. Where were you? Like in the garage? Yeah. We went to a parking garage called the Paparazzi. That's wild. Well, it's crazy. People don't, I did not know about like wig

life. Yeah, you were saying you never wear like a wig early. Like I did not realize how like you just like see a Jenner in a wig and you're like that's so It takes fucking hours and hours and hours and it's like once you have it on you don't want to have to put it back on and glue it on and the makeup and the spray tan around it's like this whole and the last thing i needed was another fake bitch like sector yeah like i could have

gone my whole life without now wanting to be a fucking wig girl right and uh but it'll save your hair you're talking about your hair honestly to like save your hair that's true i don't just wear wigs forever because that's what i had to do and they're amazing and they're great because they just braid your hair. Just like ask for them to not braid it so tight because like you were saying like some are so like rough

with the braids. Mine are so tight. I just say like just do two braids even if it's bumpy. I don't care. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Like it's almost better for your hair. Yeah. Wigs are life changing. They are. So you did that today and then last night you went to just a photo shoot.

I thought you were going to a party. No I would have. There was just nothing going on. I love to pop out on my little Halloween costumes but I'm so tired. I'm grandma mode this year. I don't think I'm going to No, I would have. There was just nothing going on. I love to pop out in my little Halloween costumes. I love it. And I'm so tired. I'm grandma mode this year.

I don't think I'm going to be the same Tana that I've always been this year. You're not going to go party. We have a big party this Friday. I wish I knew. I'm throwing a party. And then, yeah, there are a few I'll go to. Are you hosting? You're hosting it at your house?

Not at my house. Thank God. Yeah, that's a while trying to get people out. I'm trying to get people out. And I just don't like people all in my stuff. My house is kind of like yours, especially my room and like all that type of stuff where like I have a lot of my shit everywhere. Same, yeah, yeah. And I just like, I've caught people at

parties trying to steal everything possible from me like so many times, like random people. It's so scary. Yeah. Um, so I'm throwing it at my friend's house. He's like it's actually the funniest situation I should tell you all about this. Okay, tell me. This guy is he's like this Russian, like billionaire. And like, I don't know him from Adam or Eve, right?

I do like, obviously, yes, random paparazzi moments. We're always grateful for, but like when you really want to have a moment, you know, there are certain people that you call and that you work with and certain, you know, agencies and whatever. And I became really good friends with this paparazzi. His name is Frank. And so we'll work together and just, we're good friends. And, um, Frank posts me a lot on his page and this Russian billionaire guy reaches out

to Frank and he's like, he just, he just like wants to live the life. Like he wants to like, not in like a romantic way though. Okay. And I'm like 21 year old. You said there was the 21 year old billionaire I don't think he's a billionaire No he's not God you get so many rich men

There's always a catch with me That's the thing It's not like I'm a supermodel No there's always a catch So he's Russian and he doesn't want to date you No he wants to be famous Love that I don't want to say that in a wants to know you he wants to like be famous love that I don't want to say that

in like a negative way because I appreciate people who kind of own it he's like I just want the connections yeah a lot of people do like I just you know what I mean like I want to meet people

I want to like put my foot in the door in like the Hollywood scene like whatever and I made a TikTok about this and all the comments were like you can just say you're an escort and I'm like I literally would it's less words

it'd be way easier totally and it's kind of a flex like I'm getting paid like and so he just wants he wants the escort and I'm like I literally would it's less words like and so he just wants he wants the life and you know whatever so he he was like you know like we just worked out the business deal and I'm throwing a party deal does he pay you can I say that should I say that no one knows who it is right I. I'm just scared he would see it. Are you off camera?

No, I'm off camera, yes. I don't think it's bad. Like, he pays you to... I love that. First of all, I don't think that's weird. I had a similar situation. They only gave me $500 a month, but it was similar. Still? Yeah.

And I didn't do anything either. I just went to clubs with him. I was like 18 or whatever. And they just... Yeah, like a lot of people just want to meet people in Hollywood or whatever. And that's... So, yeah. So, he wanted me to throw a party at his house and invite everyone I know.

And he has this beautiful house. The Beatles used to live there. His neighbors would like Leonardo DiCaprio. Like, it's insane. I'm like, what do you want to do with me? That's crazy. So do you hang out with him or? We'll hang out.

We like get dinners and we like do stuff. And you know what I mean? Like, he's really shy and just like, we just, you know, can I ask her? How old do you say he is? Probably like 35? Oh my God, he's young too. I really, and he's the sweetest guy and I love him. And I am excited to like put him in more of my content because I think people will be

like really interested in him. So he doesn't mind. Oh, he wants to be in your content. I think so. Oh my God. I hope so. Have him on canceled. Oh my God.

So funny. So funny. I have so many questions. I have very many questions. But he's only having very few words. Like, you know what I mean? Is it because he's Russian or just because he doesn't like to talk? I think, I think maybe Russian more so.

You need to learn Russian. Suddenly. Oh my God. That's a funny new plot for me. Yes. Duo lingo Tana unlocked. Oh my God. First of all, learning a language is actually easier than you think. Especially like Russian.

I feel like I learned Hebrew in like a summer in like six weeks. You know what I mean? And then you can just say like the important things yeah how did you learn it um i just went to like a hebrew college online i just like literally and they have zoom classes and everyone just like zooms in and you're like yeah you're just like money's my muck away like oh my god that's so funny yeah it was actually everything i like learned it so so you could learn it so fast oh my god and i would just love to cuss someone out in like russian oh yeah that'd be fun So what are your costumes you have planned coming up?

I want to hear all of yours too. I might have kind of over. I mean I only have like a few more costumes left. I feel like I kind of did all mine. What was. Wait. What did you just tell me earlier that you're doing with you and Moses and Melinda? We're doing the Idol this weekend.

Which you haven't seen. Which I'm like I tell everyone to go watch this show. Everyone tells me I would love it. And like people keep also saying to me like it's your life. And it's just like a bunch of people like on drugs in Hollywood. I'm like great. It's me I would love it. And, like, people keep also saying to me, like, it's your life. And it's just, like, a bunch of people, like, on drugs in Hollywood. I'm like, great. It's about, like, a sweet girl. Well, she seems sweet.

And, yeah. And then there's, like, drugs and lots of sex. And it's very sexual, which I like. She's, like, a pop star. She has her pop star moment. So, like, we think we can relate to that because we had our pop star. But you never did, like, pop songs, right? You just did, like, rapping.

No, I did one pop song. And I did some rap. Oh, wait. i did two pop songs she knows way too much because i remember seeing that video it's like wow this is a rebrand for you because it was just like it was like in malibu i really i tried i tried the music shit for money though like i was like wild to me so you did that to make money i made zero i lost so much money how did you make money just from sales mostly like yeah like streams and sales wow and like it's amazing I mean I toured music as well oh so you made music videos are expensive as they're so expensive your w1 was

everything I watched it the other day but even that was a lot of like finesse like the Hefner music video people always ask me like what was the budget for that but it was like we found a guy who had that house who wanted publicity Hunter had was still working at an at ICM like at an agency at the time and wanted to be a videographer so it was kind of me being like I believe in you let's do it and like he just happened to be the most talented ever and like Bella Thorne just wanted to come be in the video and that's wild it just like I would always try to like finesse it you know what I I mean? That was your biggest, right? Yeah. Like how many streams? Do you know how many streams it has?

I don't know, Trisha. But you just made like a ton of money. Like maybe like 40 million. Like something crazy. I don't even know if I have a million streams. No, you definitely do. I don't think so. You definitely do.

40 million. That's like literally like Meghan Trainor status. I feel like that's crazy. Not Meghan Trainor status. Yeah, I feel like she had 40 million or something. She has so, no, she's like a platinum platinum platinum that's true she does like radio yeah but 40 million is a lot and maybe I'm making that up like it's somewhere I think near there but like wow um it made me want to continue for a while but music's also hard what do you mean like you

didn't enjoy the process of it they get being in the studio like people really like don't talk about that enough well also we both were saying we're very off beat so like no rhythm when you were in the oh my god we just we have so many little niche things in common and it's so funny that being one of them like I couldn't clap along to happy birthday what were we

doing that I'm in the club we'd be vibing like a TikTok sound and it's literally just moving your fingers to the beat and both of us could not do it like gunned to our head we were watching a market beach i don't think i can do that that looks so complicated so hard it's i've never danced on tiktok i have no rhythm and we try to do it the first time like you know what you don't even need to do the hands don't worry about it literally literally couldn't do it all like so that's what's hard for me in the in the studio they'll have to

like do like a countdown like a three, two. Because most people can hear when they're about to come in. I can never hear when I'm about to come in. They have to point to me, like, go. Same, same, same. Every single time, they've had to point to me. Every single time. Most people know when to come in.

And I always would date music boys. And so then they'd just be sitting like, babe, what? Don't you get? You know what I mean? And it's funny, because Chris Miles, when we were dating, I had him several times. Like, he would lay down the track for me. Like, he would go in there and, like, sing it and rap it like me. And it's

so funny because the lyrics would be, like, my pussy this. Like, whatever. And, like, he was such a sport for, like... And then his voice would go up like yours, too, so it'd match it. Yeah. Well, then I would go in and try to, like, emulate that melody because, like, I wouldn't be on the... It's hard. Oh, I could never do that, either. I have a guy named Jeremy who does it for me, but, like, but like I can never like I don't even know how a melody works like I'm just how did you

create that it was so hard for me to figure out and like just so like mon son would make me go in the corner face the corner like no one not in like a mean way just in a like and I would like be singing in the corner like just like on no beat and then he would like put it to the music oh yeah they've done that too where they fly it in like I could never catch it they're like we'll just we'll just move it around literally we don't even need the song right now your life is like the idol oh my god that's so like the idol because so mom's time would be like the weekend and you'd be like lily rose that because she was just way like like more disgusting which one you both of us me and mom no i don't know this this show was like critiqued for being so disgusting like it was like and he

would like hit her with like the brush that her mom used to abuse her with to like get her to sing oh that's crazy no beating accusations on my side that kind of made me think of it because he would like humiliate her to like get her to sing better I need to watch this tonight

yeah because people kind of game for him being like it's misogynist to me it's like when it's like obviously that's wrong in like real life. But when it's something like art and like stuff like that, like, you know, it's saying message. Yeah, because it also, I won't give you spoilers, but there's a big twist, you know, where you're just like, whoa, like at the end, you're like, I didn't see that coming. So anyways, I just feel like.

I'm watching it tonight. Yeah. It's like we watched What You Say to Graham Valentine's Day because I wanted to feel, I was like, let me just get like in the mood or something like that, you know. But I didn't get in the mood. But the weekend, oh my God, the idol. Oh, I was like gushing. It's, like, hot sex scenes. Crazy.

I was, like, blushing. I couldn't even watch it with, like, Moses almost because I was, like, this. I kept laughing and saying, ew, this is so cringe because I was so embarrassed watching it with him. Like, being, like, I'm so horny and, like, this is, like, so embarrassing. Yeah. I get like that, too. Oh, my God.

I was, like, ew, I hate this. And then I was, like, ah! He would make food, like, a big-ass lasagna. I'm, like, I can't eat this. Like, I'm watching someone oh my god I'm the same way if it's like a hot show you want to be like hot and like cute oh he'd always like make

pasta we're gonna watch the Kardashians I'm like they're so skinny I'm not eating a shake bowl they're shaking their salad it's like ravioli me always me every time that was me with eye ball that is so me Amari he's like dying laughing cause it's so true I've never met anyone else that felt that way because it's like they're not looking at you. They're not seeing you. I know. They're not in the room.

They never will be in the room but it's like it makes me want to like. Because you and I are so like oh my god. Like what's the word? Like easily influenced almost. Oh. Like we're watching them like shake their salad and we're like. I go and get it the next day. I'm like I need it. Like anything I see, anything I watch, I go get it right away.

I am the exact same way. I literally like, I need it. Like anything I see, anything I watch, I go get it right away. I'm the exact same way. It's so bad. I'm literally like the Bottega earrings you girls were wearing. I bought them. I'm like, Brooke, come down and give me those Bottega earrings.

I love you so, so fucking much. Anything you have, I'm like, let me just buy that. Like I always copy people. Like, but we just have the same taste,

which I like love. I was just, we were talking about this off camera and I don't mean to bring it up again. Wait, what is it like off camera i was like i just asked her like i was dead ass like what the would y'all talk about because i'm seeing stars i'm like sweating sorry but like well we dress up in costume when we're doing a podcast so it's very it was like the old the

three episodes that we did your photographer like you were saying you hired him because he was pamela anderson's photographer oh my god like back in the day oh literally last night amari was like tana are you gonna dress up as Pamela again this year? She's gonna send you a f***ing cease and desist if you do. And I, just, like, so many little intricacies. You and I, like, love the same things. Yes. Like, 2000 stuff, the Playboy of it all. Like, just all that type of shit.

Yeah. So I was just, like, clowning off camera because I was like, what would you f***ing talk about with her? Yeah, well, like, I mean, I've said this and I told you. It's like, I mean, we just were not friends. Not because she got canceled or whatever. We just, like, weren't friends. I mean, I've said this and I told you, it's like, I mean, we just were not friends. And not that like, not because she got canceled or whatever. We just like weren't friends. I mean, there's just evidence of that. Like I was never in Miranda videos.

I was never invited. Like I probably saw her twice before I had my baby. And then when I had my baby, it was like, okay, I just talked about being a mom. So I was like, okay, let me, so we like talked about that and that was it. But there was, there was not, and it was, it was difficult. It was, yeah. And sometimes that works. Like the like dichotomy of like, oh, we have nothing in common, so this can be funny. But I just like. Yeah, but I don't think that was where it was. I don't think that works like the like dichotomy of like oh we have nothing in common so this can be funny but i just like i don't think that was where yeah i don't think that

one had me either i was just trying i was trying to do something and i i really didn't know how to do one on my own and because she had a podcast i kind of was like well this kind of show me the ropes yeah that makes sense and so i kind of also was just like more like also i need i didn't know how to get ads so she did and she's like oh we can you know get ads then she's like well maybe not with mine because i don't want to get like canceled with you and i was like okay that is just such a like the people not wanting to get canceled it's like oh my god yeah which is always like crazy to me because i was just like oh okay like that's a weird like fear to have but then yeah you manifest your fears that's what i really like because i was like oh my god like every time she's like god

you're really like negative i'm thinking about this I have really like we were also just saying this off camera but just in general but like people that are so paranoid like over the years like I look back and all the people that I've like seen that were so paranoid about like I don't want to be next to you and get cancelled are the people that ended up having like shit in their closet. Always. Always. You know what I mean? And you're just like

okay so. Like I might say some outspoken shit but I'm not afraid. No right. I'm an open book. Same. Everything's out there. There's nothing else that I've done in my past that could be out there that would cancel me at this point. Everything's out there. But people project almost when they say that kind of stuff.

You know what I mean? Because they have their own skeletons or their own thing. That's what I was looking for. Skeletons in the closet. I couldn't think of a word. I saw a skeleton over there. So I saw it. I was like, there's a little skeleton over there. Do you know what I want to ask you about?

What? I want to ask you. There is a famous clip of you. The clip of you where you're being asked about, what does she say? She says, like, correct, but what are they asking her about? Oh, oh. And then, like. The center of the earth?

What was it? The center of the earth? The thinnest layer of the earth. Like, the thinnest layer of the earth, and then you were like, repeat the question, and they were like, the thinnest layer of the earth, and you were like, the thinnest layer of the earth, and then you were like, repeat the question. And they were like, the thinnest layer of the earth. And you were like, the thinnest layer of the earth. And they were like, correct. And then you were like, oh, thank you.

Like, I got a point, right? Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I just, like, you play it off like you are playing, like, oh, I'm playing ditzy. I'm playing dumb. But Brooke and I had this entire introspective conversation about how intelligent you have to be to make that joke. Oh, my gosh.

How quick you have to be for someone to say correct and then to immediately be like, oh, I got a point. Like, that's so funny. I think I get lucky because sometimes like I can be, but it's, it's definitely luck. Like I'm not, I'm not like a standup. Like I can't like make jokes on purpose. Like I can't try to be funny, but I think to me that is like, like a standup. Like it is in a way like making jokes on purpose. is like it's so intelligent to be able to like I like you already know I'm obsessed with mastering the dumb blonde bit and I play into it so much yes and but like just I just hope I mean everyone who's a stand-up you definitely does realize like you how intelligent you are but like how intelligent you have to be to do that that well and like you know what I mean like it's funny because it's like, you know, I mean,

thank you for that. It's so nice. It's always, to me, the best compliment is when people like still don't know, you know, they still like, people will be like,

wait, but she was joking on that, right? Like, you know, it's always funny to me. And then sometimes I'm like, even with Moses,

this is how a good loss I get in the character. Sometimes like, I don't even know if I was, is that real? Like sometimes I don't even know what's real. I'm like, because sometimes I'm not smart. Like I'm telling you the gravity thing.

Like I really, just in general, like gravity confuses me. Oh no, just in general, like, gravity confuses me. Oh, no. What confuses me? Climate change confuses me. Do you know climate change? Bitch, do you think? Oh, my God, Trisha.

Exactly. If you ever want to do an episode, if you ever want to do an episode where someone just asks us questions like that, I think it would be the funniest fucking episode of all time. I think we're, like, emotionally intelligent. Yes. But when it comes to shit like that, yeah, I don't know shit. That's what I'm saying. There's some times where I'm genuinely like, people think it's so funny

and so I play into it, but I generally have no idea what climate change is. Yeah, I have no f***ing clue about it at all. Like when they say what is it, global warming, I'm always just like what? What is that? Because it's about glaciers. No, it's not. Yes, it is. No, it's not. Global warming is about ice. But what if they cool off the world?

That's what I thought too. So why is it called? We're scared of global warming, right? Yeah. We're scared of it. Yeah. But if there's glaciers, I'll chill in. So why are we scared of it?

That's exactly. I don't know. I always think it's going to be way when we're gone. But then people are like, you're children. And I'm like, I don't know. We'll be dead. So I don't know. Right?

When global warming takes over, we're gone. I'm so f***ing for real. What is global warming? I don't know. Do you want to fill us in yeah can you can you moses has his microphone over there i've actually never asked him because i just like not knowing i guess and it's funny because we're gonna stare at him the whole time we're both gonna go oh and then still not know i have like i have no idea this idea that the earth is warming up so the glaciers are melting and then there's more water. So the ocean will rise. Okay.

Very Moses of you. Very Moses with the water. Water coding. But like. Oceans rise. That's from Hamilton. Oceans rise. Empires fall.

We have seen each other through it all. But like. They predicted it. How is the earth getting. Wow. How is the earth getting warmer? Because we have so many cars. Like the sun is getting closer.

No, they claim that we make it warmer. Paige is saying ozone. You're saying we're making it warmer. Ozone is old. Like there used to be a hole in the ozone. I'm already saying pollution. We fixed that. We're all just guessing.

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You said I said cars, but I don't think I said cars. I think someone else said cars. I don't know shit. I was like, oh, cars. I said that. I don't know. It's so confusing. I know Leonardo DiCaprio feels strongly about global warming.

While he's flying jets all over the world. He really does. While he's flying jets all over the world. Isn't that it? It's so funny. Yeah. He has private jets. I was about to just come for Leonardo DiCaprio.

He's fine. You might be at your party this weekend because your neighbor is with him. I think I'm too old. Yeah, you are. I am. Yes. 25 is the cutoff. 25? I thought it was 24. Well, I think when they turn old. Yeah, you are. I am. Yes. 25 is the cutoff. 25? I thought it was

24. Well, I think when they turn 25, he stops dating them, so. Oh, wow. God damn it. I miss my mom. Isn't that crazy? You are too old for him? Yeah. Wild. Wild. It's crazy. Who have you gotten flown out by? Who's the craziest person you've gotten flown out by? I actually don't get

flown out a lot, nor do I like to. Okay, you don't like it. Like. Does flown out mean you have to hook up with them or they just, like, hang out? I think that it depends on the person. Like, if they're, like, a good person and you connect and you catch a vibe, maybe, like, a nice guy. But, like, athletes and shit, like, they just want to fuck you, right?

And Drake, too. Like, he flies out with girls. Does he just want to have sex with them? For sure. Really? Yeah. I just thought, like, because some girls would say, we're just friends. Not that I wouldn't fuck Drake. You would? I don't know.

I'm a weekend girly. If I was single. I'm a Drake girly. I don't know. You would. I think Drake is so hot. I feel like he has no... I mean as a fembot, like I'm never getting fucked by Drake. I keep forgetting. Wait, that's so weird because I feel like his standards are like low. Not that, you know what I mean? Like his standards are so low. I feel like you're so high caliber. Every person I know that's fucked Drake is hot as fuck. No, that's so weird because I feel like his standards are like low. Not that, you know what I mean? Like his standards are so low, I feel like you're so high

caliber. Every person I know that's fucked Drake is hot as fuck. No, I've seen some girls that talk about it. Really? But not like in a bad way. Like I kind of love, like Usher too. He's definitely hooked up with some not cute ones. I also just imagine that it's like, think about their life, you know what I mean? Like he's just on the road every night. Like sometimes

it's just like. You get an ugly. Yeah, he probably just, you get an ugly. I think that's more endearing because for people like me, I'm like, oh, I could have a chance. Like sometimes it's just like. You get an ugly. Yeah. You probably just. You get an ugly. I think that's more endearing. Because for people like me. I'm like. Oh. I could have a chance. Like Usher.

He had a lawsuit. It humanizes them. Yes. For sure. And when I saw the girls. I like. We're suing him for giving them herpes. Or something else.

It's like. Oh. It kind of gives me hope. Because they. Not that they were unattractive. They're just not like tens. That you would think. And I was like.

Oh. Like. Well. It's also like. I feel like it's just. You see this so much with people. That become so famous. Where it's like.

To guys like that. I feel like pussy pussy is just like another drug they do. Like a pill or a bump or a whatever. Like they just become so desensitized to like the body attached to like, you know what I mean? Yeah. I think Drake said that too. I think he, I think in the Bobby Althoff podcast, I think he said something where he was like, he doesn't want to settle down because he just wants to like live life and be with a

girl all the time. Like different girls. Like eventually he probably doesn't want to settle down because he just wants to like live life and be with a girl all the time, like different girls. Well, it's like eventually, he probably doesn't even know how. Like he could literally be with the baddest bitch in the world and would probably still cheat because of the like. Didn't Jay-Z cheat on Beyonce, right?

That's like a whole thing. Isn't that what like lemonade is about? Which is like insane to me. So it's like at that level, like if Beyonce's being cheated on, it's like almost like every famous guy just cheats, I think. I think everyone's gonna cheat. Yeah. Well, I think it'd be fine like a regular person that they're less like I but I don't think he'll ever cheat I mean we're together 24 7 so I don't know I never say never

I got an eye on him yeah it's actually funny because like I like I went out to dinner on Friday night by myself and I was just like it's so weird like he never goes out by himself like he's always just either with me or like I don't know that's so cute though that's the goal but there are like exceptions to the rule but I have definitely gotten to a point where I'm like I could see myself marrying someone that would end up cheating on me and like being okay with it not okay with it like I'm gonna raise hell I'm insane yeah you know what I mean like I'm gonna make you suffer you'll know about it and he'll know that too like you know because you'll find out for sure it's you or two can tango you know what I mean like I'm sure the cheater has a hot best friend totally yes yeah yeah yeah like not everyone's cheated on

you though that you've been in a relationship with not everyone at all so you believe then because i just believe everyone cheated for so long i was like everyone cheats so yeah you see in a relationship where it doesn't happen a lot being cheated on is a part of my like villain origin story i think like you know what i Like, it definitely made me a really different person. Like, who, how old were you? Were they famous? How did you find out? The first time I, I'm trying to really think.

I've achieved it a couple times. I mean, when I was dating, when I was dating Lil Xan, I, but obviously you know Lil Xan's gonna cheat on you. Okay, he's a rapper. He's a rapper named Lil Xan. And this was like. What a name. Crazy. It's a good name. Absolutely crazy. And this was like. What a name. Crazy.

It's like a name. Absolutely crazy. This was like at the time of his like rise to fame as well. So I was like enamored by the lifestyle. This is the first time I'd ever dated like anyone in that like scene or whatever. He had an assistant the entire time we were dating who was his cousin. And he was like, oh, this is my cousin. Like she works for me.

She'd be over all the time like doing the dishes, cleaning the house. Like, whole night. Come to find out she wasn't his cousin. They were f***ing the entire time. And she was down to, like, lie to me and be like, yeah, I'm his cousin. Oh, my. Or they were cousins, which I, you know. And they were.

Who knows? You know. Oh, my God. How did you find out? Did you walk in? Did someone text you? So, I think he ended up telling me himself. Wow.

Okay. But honest king. We love that. Right love that right forward with it yeah i don't i but it wasn't like in a i think we're like in a fight he was like by the way she's on my fuck i don't even i really don't even actually remember how i like like this specific moment i found out and then after that i had a long-term relationship with a guy named brad he looked like justin bieber and we were dating. Oh, what? Did he cheat on you? Yeah, it was the craziest shit, Trisha.

What happened? Because it was. Well, he was probably looking for, like, fame. And once he got it. He taught me a lot about, like, you cannot just, like, believe everything someone is. But there is a part of me that also, like, the way he treated me. And, like, he has apologized every single day since then. Like, you know what I mean?

Your friends now? We're cool now. Yeah I mean like to this day we're cool now yeah like to this day like a part of me does believe he got caught up in definitely like the lifestyle or I'm just fucking telling myself that I don't really know but um we were at a Coachella and I had been wanting to break up with him for like a while like just for other reasons like I just felt like I was in the point of my career where I noticed it really like like shifting and taking off. And I felt like being tied down wasn't good. And I didn't want to, like, be bad to him in that regard.

And just, like, not that he was controlling. He wanted everything that, like, a boyfriend would usually want. And I think I just wanted to be, like, wild child free. Right. And so I ended up breaking up with him. And then he, like, went went all crazy did a bunch of crazy stuff like at this coachella was kind of like threatening like his like life kinda and his life his own his own life and like he like took a bunch of drugs and like just all this shit happened he

was like the paramedics had to come all this shit they 51 50 held him and when they 51 50 held him i had his phone and then all these snapchat notifications started going off from all these girls and that's he was on a 5150 hold when i found out he was cheating on me which was so crazy and you kind of like feel sorry for him because like damn he's like in a like a mental hospital the hardest thing and then i was like he came back and i was like okay what night is it the night i went to a mental hospital what night is it did we go together he's at my mental hospital the same 5150 oh it's your birthday oh my god no no there's so many random things like i found out that one of

the nights he was cheating on me i was throwing like a whole birthday party for me a birthday party for him like at my house and shit but it was all virtual cheating as well though like he was just snapchatting like a bunch of like nudes and sexting that's so awful I mean it's not as bad I guess as like him like having sex with other girls but on your birthday which is like wild that happened to Chloe too on his birthday that I threw for him that's what Chloe on Tristan's birthday is when he got that girl pregnant she threw

a party for him and got the girl pregnant the night of his birthday party like that is so crazy that Chloe threw for him that is so and I went all out like that's what I mean when I think villain origin story like I turned my whole house. Like he was from Canada and like was like staying in LA to be with me. So I like made it snow in my house. Like made it all

Canada. Like all this shit. Like that was like kind of the start of me being like oh my god. This. Yeah. You know what I mean? I know. It takes like one or two guys. One really. Like I've had a villain origin story too where I'm like this is where it turned. Yeah. Because I'm like I'm so. It just. it messes you up because I'm the same way. You go so hard for someone and then when they just don't care at all about how, like, your

feelings have no respect for you. Also when you're, like, known, it's almost like the humiliation thing because so many people knew you guys were so public. Yeah. So it's more humiliating that he's, like, doing this behind your back. Oh, yeah. Because then they're like, uh-huh, Tana thinks she has this guy but he's, like, DMing me or messaging me.

Exactly. And that was, like, there were so many girls like that and I was just like oh my god. It really was like my I remember like the day I went back and changed all of our Instagram captions to like me with cheater. Oh yeah that was iconic. Like me with this and like and that's where that kind of I wasn't really like that before.

Yeah. Like fuck you to like men and that kind of like you know what I mean like change. Cause you really just brought him up so much. I didn't know what he did before but you know you guys were everywhere together. I mean you guys were like a couple like what I mean, like changed. Because you really just brought him up so much. I didn't know what he did before, but you guys were everywhere together. I mean, you guys were like a couple. You were a social media couple. Then I learned so much about, you know what I mean, ensuring that if someone doesn't do what I do already, are there intentions?

Right. Well, that's why you're smart then to date people that are like the equal amount of fame, if not like more fame in the mainstream, you know, like the singers. Or just like I vet them out to make sure they're not dating me because of that. it's so hard because like how do you even know it's like britney spears she was in that marriage for like eight years and it's like obviously he was trying to benefit off of her but it's like how do you know you know everybody's gonna try and benefit off britney spears i'm probably everybody will try to benefit off you in some capacity everyone and it's it's hard too because i think a lot of times it's like people don't always go into it for that but then they

become like obsessed with what they see. That's why dating people in entertainment is tough because it's like they get a song off of you. They get something. You know what I mean? And it's just like maybe they don't go in with that intention. Obviously, people are going to like you for you. But it's like with entertainment, it's almost – that's how I always felt. Even if I really genuinely like the person, I'm like, but you know what?

They have followers or this. And then it's like it kind of keeps you in that relationship more. Yeah. I don't know. Oh, yeah. I don't know. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Like, is this person even, like, would they stay with me if I had nothing to offer them?

Yeah. And most of the time, it's like, no. That's why I did love dating, like, a normal guy that, like, wasn't on social media. Because I was like, this is kind of nice. Because, like, there's no benefit of anything. There's, like, so many drawbacks. Like, he, like, hated that. So many people, like, knew his, like, business and was, like, looking stuff up about him.

And it's almost like that's a better thing. But it is hard because I think it's hard. And I talked to Brooke when she was on. She's coming up in a couple weeks. And she was on. And she was, like, looking stuff up about him. And it's almost like that's a better thing. But it is hard because I think that's why. And I talked to Brooke when she was on. She's coming up in a couple weeks. And she was on. And she was saying that, too. It's just almost like the excitement's not there if you date a normal person. Like, if you date a banker, are you going to be excited about them?

And for me, the, like, to me, the number one benefit of dating someone that does what you do is, like, they understand the shit that you're going through. Oh, yeah. Like, you know what I mean? More so than someone who doesn't. Yeah, especially, like, the hate, you know, because he would get so much hate comments, like, directed towards him because he was dating me and he, like, didn't understand it.

You know what I mean? Yeah. So, I think you have to date someone to know that because otherwise they're going to get so much hate just for dating you, you know? Yeah, which is just crazy as is. Yeah. Yeah. That's always tough, but I feel dating is just hard. But also, like, at 25, I mean, just... Yeah. I mean, that also helps me, like, weed out people as well. Just same thing. Like, if you wouldn't want to be seen with me because you're afraid of like people being

mad at you for like, I don't want to be with you anyway. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Who are you dating now? You're like said you're going on dates more. I'm going, I'm going on dates, but like I'm not dating anyone. If that makes sense. I feel, I feel pretty single.

Okay. I'm not going to lie. This is like the first time in my life where I just feel like I'm doing me and yes I'm going on dates but like I'm just like I feel so done with like the pointless shit. Yeah. Like if I like what's the like I used to be like oh my god like I'm going to date this person and we can have fun and

you know we'll see where it goes and if it lasts a couple months like who cares like I had so much fun. The casual dating. You're over. Yeah. I'm just I'm just at the point where it's like I think I would just rather do me than be with someone that I'm not gonna like marry totally or at least like yeah I've always been like that too I've always been like I would say it right away I'm like I want to get married and when people waste my time it like pissed me off so much so we're like I actually don't want to get married I'm like why would you then like lead me on with this you know 100% I

think it's just like I was more down for it too because I felt like I was in a time of my life where I still had shit to learn. Yeah. Like I could date this person and learn like, okay, I don't want this. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean? But I have just been through it. You've gone through so many. I have just learned everything I do and don't want in a relationship to the point now where I'm like, why the fuck would I do that again?

Yeah. Or that again or date this person in a different font again. Right. You know like what you want. And it's not even like you have to get married like tomorrow but just be up front and be like, I want to get married one day. I want this. I want stability. I want monogamy. It's good to be upfront like that. Cause you know, and even just like, I don't like, I don't want to date someone and like, like some things about them, but be making myself pretend to like so many things about them or trying to make myself fall for them for

the idea of a relationship. And you know what I mean? Feeling loved and feeling wanted and like, you know? Right. Yeah. That's, I think that's a? Feeling loved and feeling wanted and like, you know? Right. Yeah. That's, I think that's a really important thing because it's just like, just knowing what, and knowing this at such a young age at 25, I feel like you're going to be like set up for like good.

But at the same time, like do you get, do you feel, you probably don't cause you're surrounded by people all the time. Do you feel like lonely ever? I used to be that way where it was like I had to be dating someone. Like I was so codependent. I never wanted to sleep alone.

Like I never like, you know what I mean? I wanted to be texting someone like all day every day like all of that and I finally like within the last like year and a half really just broke that yeah like I just realized it was like codependency is like just such a form of addiction in a way easy and trauma bonds with people to the amount of people I just stayed with because it was like the addiction to the dopamine of the like toxic highs. Oh, that's the worst. Like the time being addicted to the toxicity or the, cause I always thought like if you're not fighting, you're not like in love, you know what I mean? Like, oh, they don't care about me if they're not fighting with me. And it's such a real thing. Like now when I give people advice about it or talk about it,

it's like you really, especially if you were raised in chaos or born into chaos, you, your brain becomes so conditioned to think that that's love, that love is something you have to fight for, that you almost like need that suffrage to have those highs to like deserve them and so on and so forth. And it's, and it's again, like it's even just like feeling yourself break out of a toxic thing. It's like being addicted to cigarettes or a drug or something. It's like you want to call them. You want to keep going back. You have to like actively fight that addiction to toxicity and like codependency.

Yeah. That's the toughest part. But you still keep friends with some of your exes, right? I do for the most part. So you don't think that's bad? I think that a lot of times if someone does something that's really hurtful, there should be a period of time like where it's like, and then friends is like, like even Brad, I was just talking about, it's not like we're like friends and talk all the time. We're just cool.

You know, like an occasional he'll reach out. Like I'm not reaching out, but like if he does, you're not hanging out. Like, Hey, how are you? Yeah. If you found the love of your life, would you still talk to like my son and Chris? And, um, I do not talk to my son. He's one of those ones where I thought you were like friends with him. No, no, no. We tried to date again. And that was my final lesson. That was my final lesson this year. I'm not kidding you.

That was my final, final, final lesson. I was like, Oh, um, I don't, I don't know. I think that I was hoping that we would go back and try one more time and maybe a lot of things that we didn't work out we had grown from and and maybe this is like narcissistic to say and he has a whole different standpoint but like I felt like I had grown so much as a person but I was like dating the same person that I was years ago yeah you don't he changed not a lot is he your age or no he's like's like 36. Okay. Oh yeah. And when you're like older like that, you should kind of have growth at that point. Yeah. And I just think it wasn't a good fit. Like he just, you know what I mean? And if I can say something kind, it's like

he needs to be with someone who is not me, you know? Right. He gets a lot of girls. Like he was with Avril Lavigne, right? So it's like, he must have something about him. Like, what is it? And that, yeah, I mean, mean he is he's an amazing he's like a really positive happy fun okay person a good amount of the time okay you know so he's like charming and really talented i think like really really fucking talented in so many ways and i think that can be like so enamoring for sure and caring and loving but you have to also weigh into like is it caring and loving or is it love bombing and there's just like so much different what is the difference between

that because I feel like I could be a love bomber sometimes I love to just tell someone straight up right away like how much I love them and I want to marry them and but I mean it I'm genuine about it well but that's kind of like being like enamored by someone and like being like love bombing to me how would I put it into words I feel like love bombing to me is like, it's only in the beginning. It's not through thick and thin. It's not a real love. Like it's, you know what I, it's, it's almost with, and so I feel like a lot of people do it without even knowing, but it's almost a lot of the times can be like with intent, like negative intent to like, what, what's the end goal? I mean, negative is like a strong word, but like, I'm going to do all this to get this person

and then I don't necessarily need to keep doing it. And then they stop doing it or something. Yeah or like you know what I mean? Yeah. Or you after a period of love bombing I guess happens then you start to see more true colors and shit. You know? I don't know.

I've never been love bombed. They've always just hated me from the beginning. They've made it clear that they're disgusted with me really yeah i never had a love bomber ever i just but you always say that and it's like you were just i'm i'm obsessed with you oh my gosh i dated you don't understand how anyone could like ever not like you know but i get it i've dated people who i'm like you hated me yeah i've never i've never dated anyone that liked me before Moses for real, like for real. And it's like, it's evident during, after all of it.

I'm just like, wow, they really did. I really do think it's not that you're like, you are the most lovable ever. I think that it's, I mean, and correct me if I'm wrong. Cause I relate to this so much, but it was a people like, I almost, I feel like there are times in my life where like as a form of self harm, I would go for people that specifically like. That might be true. Like, uh, yeah, almost like, almost like uh but honestly I don't know I probably would have dated people that liked me but

I just I don't know I have no idea what it was you know there's some people even on TikTok that are like 35 and never had a boyfriend I mean that was literally me when I was like I never lived with someone I never had a serious boyfriend so you know there's just certain people that just don't get into relationships but that's so awesome to like have all those firsts with like the love of your life uh yes but also like yeah I'm not discrediting the years of like no you know what it is it's just like you you're envious like you have all these relationships that you talk about and you're like i wish i would have in my 20s had like relationships and i miss that like young love you know i do but i think i will look back when i'm older and be like good god like you you like you did a lot

tana you're gonna be like i lived because one day you you did a lot, Tana. You're going to be like, I lived. Because one day you will be married, and you'll be with the same person for the rest of your life. You'll be like, God, I really lived life. And not to say I didn't. I hope so. Because there's a part of my brain where I'm like, I feel like I can see myself looking back at me like, holy fuck, that was insane.

No, to me, even with the whole when Dylan Danis was coming for Nina Agnew, I was kind of like, honestly, she lived such a cool life. Like, I wish I was dating Leonardo DiCaprio. I felt the same way. I felt the exact same way. Brooke and I were saying that. We were like like that is so I wish someone was tweeting photos of me and Leonardo DiCaprio same LeBron James with me I'm

just like that would be so cool mine I would always just I would name drop and no one know who the names are I'm like I just love the idea of it I was just like 100% saying you know I think that's exciting and I think it's good to like live your life fully and yeah I agree with that I hope I hope I look at things that way only forever. You will. Oh, my God. I feel like you do, though, now. I feel like you know you live, like, such a fun, like, exciting life. There's, like, you know, you just battle back and forth with different thought processes. Right.

Like, there's a big part of me that is, like, I lived my life. I was a wild party girl for a long time. And, like, now I can. I feel like I really am, like, in a transitional period where, like, I'm leaving a lot of things behind. What? So partying? Drinking. Are you still sober? Yes, I'm leaving a lot of things behind what so partying drinking are you still sober yes I'm still sober wow it was just like insane because I actually only we've really started here recently when you've been sober so that's all I know you as

so I don't really know you as like even when we knew each other in the past I never saw you as like a drunk part I don't know I don't know what your thing was drinking drugs I don't know drinking I never saw you like obliterated I never was like wow you're the best. You're lucky for that. Really? You've always been like so quick and sharp. Even if I was still drinking you would still see me like this. Like I wasn't like waking up and like getting drunk. Okay. I just felt like I had become so

accustomed to the party lifestyle. Right. Like just really normalized it. And especially here in LA like no one has real f***ing jobs. Like in my world people go out every single night and there's something happening every single night and you can just normalized it and especially here in LA like no one has real jobs like in my world yeah people go out every single night and there's something happening every single night and you can just like really fall into that world and I'm just like numbing out your life by you know going into this crazy party lifestyle and stuff like I just I don't know I finally just feel like I've done it

all I've seen it all and I feel very grown like even you're like Halloween parties I'm like I'd rather just shoot take the look off and go I love that because I thought last night you went out because i saw you in your jennifer's body office like oh my gosh you must have went out and partied and you're like no i literally went to photo shoots and then so then what you just go home and like chill in your bed i took it all off i smoked a joint and just like hung out i ordered a diet frozen diet coke from mcdonald's have you they have a frozen one i need to go get it right now it's like movie theater level wait it's like movie theater level. Wait, really? It's like movie theater level is the best thing I've ever had in my entire life.

Oh, that sounds, okay. Diet Coke's my favorite, but frozen Diet Coke sounds. Are you fucking literally kidding me? I've never had it. Oh, wait, I don't know if it was Diet Coke. I might be making that up. Frozen Coke? I don't know.

It was insane. I mean, they probably could do a frozen Diet Coke. I'm sure they could. They could, yeah. It was the most insane thing ever. It made my whole night better than anything I could possibly do. I love that for you. I love that that's your excitement.

Because that's what would get me excited too. It's like coming home from like a photo shoot for like 10 minutes that you took photos for. And then just like having a Diet Coke. Like right. So f***ing good. Looking at your photos. I love to check like make the photos I just did. Yes.

And TikToks. So f***ing good. Oh I love that for you. That's how I felt. And I still will do shit for like work. You know. Yeah. Like I'm going to go to a few events that are like work.

And you know. Or I feel like I want to be seen there doing this, but like, I'm just very strategic about it now. Like I have no desire to like go everywhere, go party and whatever. But that's so important. It's also important because it's just like you are that person that's like seen. I was like, I was saying, you're like on every podcast, everything. And like, that's so you, you're so visible. And I think that's why you're so successful.

I just can't wait for the day that I can like move to Nebraska. You're not going to move to Nebraska. At all. Would you ever? Because I feel like now people are in like Wyoming, Montana, Colorado. I know. Would you ever? I just get a yak farm next door to f***ing. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

No, no. There's no beef here. There's only yak. Just yak. I would love to try some yak meat. So would I. That's a video. Like, oh my God, should we?

I'll order some. Next time you come by. I love you because she means it. I we? I'll order some. Next time you come by, we'll get some. I love you because she means it. I will. I'll bring it to your house. Like anyone else who said that would not actually go and do it. I might actually order some.

Yeah, that would kind of be a good thing. I kind of want to try some yuck. Yuck me. I would move away maybe. People are always like, where do you think you're going to end up? And it's to say, but I think it depends on who I end up with, which I know is like. No, that's so normal. I don't ever want people to think I'm like living my life for a man, but I'm saying I don't know where

my future ends. Honestly, that's why I always prop buying a house because I never saw me buying a house and having a man move in with me. You know what I mean? I always say this. I always say this. Because it's like you have to collab on it. It's gotta be like a... Thousand percent. I would never want to buy a house and someone moves in with me. I don't know. That feels weird and I don't

want that. Dude, well at least in California with so much of the taxes and so much sometimes renting is equal like to buying. Yes. And people are always like why don't you buy a house? And I feel like you would relate on this. Like I just for so long I've been like dude I can't decide anything permanently. No.

You'll change quick. You'll meet someone who now is like a country singer in Nashville and you're like I'm moving to Nashville. And I'm still in that era where I like I just I don't know if here is forever. I have the same thing. I meet people that were like a singer in Nashville and I was like I'm moving to Nashville and then you have to like I'm still in that era where I like I just I don't know if here is forever I have the same thing I I do people that were like a singer in Nashville I was like I'll move to Nashville with him like I would move literally anywhere I almost was gonna do like 90 day fiance where I go to like a different country like because you just don't know you're like maybe that's my calling you almost did 90 day fiance I did actually in quarantine happened and it happened so I had a friend who I really liked

I would say we were dating he maybe not he was German was German, and he was, oh god, he was, he was gorg, and I, I think I even told Moses about this when we first met, because I was like, we were supposed to, like, be on it and stuff like that, and we, like, got, like, engaged, and it honestly was all for the, I guess on his end, so was it always a cardboard cutout? No, it was a real person, wait, what? No, no, no, but I'm saying, like, were you actually really engaged, and then you were like, oh, just kidding, it's a cardboard person. Wait, what? Breath in? No, no, no. But I'm saying like, were you actually really engaged? And then you were like, oh, just kidding. It's a cardboard cutout or these two different things? No, that's two different things.

I just had a whole master plan went through in my mind. Okay, sorry. The cardboard cutout era was 2019. That's when I was just on drugs. This was like, I'm in my sane mind. Let me like get married. And so I actually really did want to get married. He, I wouldn't say it was for the show, but he wanted to obviously like come over here

and do the whole K1 visa. And I wanted to get married. So, he had said, because he knew I liked to be on a reality show, like, oh, we should do this, like, 90 Day Fiancé. What is the premise of 90 Day Fiancé? Wait, you never watched it? No. Oh, I love it.

I've been, I love it. So, okay, you guys have to watch it together. Do you guys watch TV together? Like, you and Amari, are you guys in bed watching TV? Yes. Okay, I love that. We have sleepovers a lot, too. That's actually how I take out my codependency healthily now.

Like, when I'm, like, bored and alone, I'll be like, come to my room. That's so fun. I love that. Amari is literally the sweetest. He's my brother. He's so nice. It's the best. I love you.

You're so sweet and so wonderful. I look at him with such love in my eyes. He's my little pumpkin. He's my favorite person. I can't wait to go to his family's house, his mom's house. I'm not kidding you. I can't wait to bring you home. I'm not even kidding.

I love it. Next time you're in Vegas, we are taking Trisha home. For sure. Next time you're in Vegas, we are taking Trisha home. For sure. Next time you're in Vegas, let me know. We just drive up there. It's so easy for us now. We like drive up there. Dude, I swear to God, we were driving to like upstate California the other day or not upstate,

downstate. See, that's where I get dumb. I don't know where the fuck. I don't know the difference geographically. Well, I mean, up is probably up and down is probably down. I would assume. I think so. Right?

Does anyone say downstate? I don't know. Downstate. No one says that. But I just said that. And it's like driving to Vegas is faster. Yeah. Than a lot of shit in California. right? I think I don't fucking know. Does anyone say downstate? I don't know. Downstate. No one says that, but I just said that. Um, and it's like driving to Vegas is faster. Yeah.

Than a lot of shit in California. Yeah. Unless you're doing your PJ. Is that what they call them? Private jets. Yeah. Unless you're doing a PJ. Oh my God.

Then you get this drive up to Van Nuys. Thank God. It is kind of cool. The only time I did do it was just driver's star. And that was like actually kind of cool. I was like, I would love, you and I should do a podcast from a jet.

Um, that sounds expensive. On me, on me, on me, on me. Well, do podcast from a jet. Um, that sounds expensive. On me, on me, on me, on me. Well, do you know a connection? Are you going to like finesse us to get one? Because I don't want you to pay for it. Maybe ask your Russian person. There's weird, because I love to spend money like on purses and stuff, but like a $30,000

jet or like $10,000 jet even was like, seems so crazy to me. I'm so the opposite. Oh. I love to spend money on experience versus nice shit. And I like, it's so weird. I agree. But like a jet, like I sleep, you know, I sleep on a'm so the opposite. I love to spend money on experience versus nice shit and I like it so weird. I agree but like a jet like I sleep. You know I sleep on a plane all the time. I can't stay up. I have like no sleep. I know I will. I'll just pay to sleep for the convenience. It's so bad.

That's like that's the I wish like if I could go back in time and not be put on to like flying private like I almost would. Really? Because it's like I just I'm such a lazy ass bitch. Yeah it's easy for you. And like just rolling the fucking suitcase out of the car and like just oh? Because it's like, I just, I'm such a lazy ass bitch. Yeah. And like just rolling the fucking suitcase out of the car and like,

just, Oh my God. It's like my, but it's like, I say it like, it's like, you know what I mean? Like the convenience of being in a comfortable car.

It's not, it's ridiculous. Yeah. I mean, to me, I feel that way about like first class, but even that's like a splurge. I'm like,

Oh my God, no, but private jets are wild. I'm like the other day I was like, I wanted to buy like a bed frame and the bed frame was like $1,700 and I was like I can't. And Ari was like Tana do you know what you've spent on like this trip?

Do you know what you've spent on this trip? Like he had to be like get the bed frame you're going to have it forever. Did you get it? I got the bed frame. Where's it from? CB2. Where's that? CB2 is it's like nice furniture. It's like the furniture like whatever but I honestly I could go on a whole rant about them. Wait, why?

Not good? Like just the delivery times and all the like whatever. Well, that's like notorious with furniture people. They never show up on time. Things are broken. Like it's always the case. And it's like if you don't like confirm your delivery like four times within these windows, they can just keep your money and not give you the furniture.

Like what the fuck? Did that happen to you? That did happen to me like five years ago. Okay. With Z Gallery furniture. No way. I bought $10,000 in Z Gallery, and I didn't confirm within a seven-day window. And I got none of my furniture, and they kept my money.

They kept $10,000? Yes. Did you ever tell this story? Honestly, not enough. You and Z Gallery. Wait, that's illegal. And I still shop. Illegal.

I still shop. At Z Gallery? At Z Gallery Couch last year. Are they even around? Because their store closed down at Beverly Hills. Their store's closed down at Chermokes. I think they're kind of like, just, yeah, they went a little. But I love their cloud couches more than the Reformation hardware ones.

Oh, my God. We had a cloud couch, and it was the worst thing ever. It was always deflated. And it goes down. But Z Gallery makes a leather one that is indestructible. I've done everything you could possibly think of with this couch. I could blow it up, and it would still be there. Wait, really? Yes. Z-calorie. How much was it?

I think it's a cloud couch, cloud sectional for $5,000. Okay, that's not bad. The cloud was $20,000 at Restoration Hardware. That's how much I paid because that's when like David had it. I was like, I'm going to get this too. Everyone has that couch. It's awful. That couch is $20,000. It was $20,000. I gave it to my mom and she has a couch and she uses that one for the dog.

She's like, let the dogs be behind it because it's like literally so low and like deflated. And they like get really shitty. That's why I never bought that couch because I was like the last thing I need is. I know. I'm weird about furniture. I want it to be into fucking structable. Yeah. Because I'm just like awful. I know. We're the same way. I'm always like I want to like be able to do the most to it because I like to

jump on couches. I like to do all that stuff like that. Absolutely. Like I wish I could be one of those people where it's like no outside clothes inside and like no this, no that. Oh, wait. Do you wear your outside clothes inside? Like, do you wear your outside clothes in your bed? No. Oh, that? And I'm... You don't? You don't. No one

does that. You do. You wear your clothes that you sat in Chili's with and you're gonna put your butt in your bed? Yes. No. But I'm just... Oh my God. I'm not clean at all. I mean, we have a housekeeper and stuff, but I'm not like, I'm a messy person. I don't care. I'm not OCD.

But that's if I'm like, yeah, I'll wear like underwear out of the packaging and I don't care. But it's just like, I don't know, putting your clothes where you just, I don't know. I have to change. I think that a lot of my mentality is like that. This is like such a dark response to this whole conversation. Comes from when I was just know. I have to change. I think that a lot of my mentalities like that, this is like such a dark response to like this whole conversation, comes from like when I was just so depressive for so long.

I would, like obviously I would just like fall asleep in my bed in my clothes. Like I didn't care about anything. Wow. So I would just, and I just like, some things just stuck. That's wild. That's wild. Because even when I was depressed, I'm like, let me just get some sweatpants on and be an ugly bitch in sweatpants.

You know what I mean? Or I'd just be the ugly bitch in sweatpants all day and then still sleep in them.pants, you know what I mean? Or just be the ugly bitch in sweatpants all day and then still sleep in them, like, you know what I mean? Two days deep, three days deep. Nothing, like, freaks me out ever. I'm just like, eh, you know, whatever. Even, like, not showering for a couple days, it doesn't bother me if someone doesn't shower for a couple days, but that, I don't know. I'm just like, at least switch the outfits.

That's wild. That's wild. Showering is, like, you probably relate to this, though. Showering as a fake bitch is just, like, so, it's doing the most. Yeah, I don't like to shower. I mean, I, once I'm in it, I'm fine. I like it, but Iowering is like, you probably relate to this, though. Showering as a fake bitch is just like so, it's doing the most. Yeah. I don't like to shower. I mean, once I'm in it, I'm fine. I like it.

But I'm not like, I love to shower. Yeah, that's what I don't understand. I just spit everywhere. But like people who love to shower, it's because they just get out. It's usually the people who get out and they're just like all natural and like whatever. I see what you're saying. Yeah, it's like more maintenance. Like spray tan, like hair, like your head of hair, your hair removal.

Putting it up, yeah, the shaving. The blow drying the hair after. Oh my God, everything to shave, everything is just like your head of hair, your hair removal. Putting it up. Yeah, the shaving. The blow drying the hair after. Oh, my God. Everything to shave. Everything is just like so much work for me. So much fucking work. It's like a lot. Yeah, the hair.

And then I get out and I tan my body after the shower. So it's like a whole thing. Yeah, it's a lot. All of it. Yeah, I kind of just. Like it's not a peaceful thing to me. It feels like a chore. Especially a hair wash.

I'm just like, that sounds awful. Yeah, and then you have to exfoliate your whole body. Like just so many fucking things. Yeah, I don't love. Iiate your whole body. I never. So many fucking things. Yeah, I don't love to shower. When I was single, I would shower every couple days or something like that. I was just like, okay, now I try to shower every other day. I'll shower more for someone. Oh, for sure.

Yeah. And early on, I would always shower every day, but now I'm just like, eh. Yeah. I don't stink, though. I don't really stink. I don't work out. I like to think I smell good. Yeah, you smell great.

You always smell good. No, you smell good. I smell like Tanner. I smell like work out. I like to think I smell good. Yeah, you smell great. You always smell good. No, you smell good. I smell like Tanner. I smell like Tanner today. Yeah, I smell a little bit like Tanner. That's oof. No, you smell good. You get me.

I don't like workout or anything, so I feel like if I did, I'd probably shower more. I've been trying so hard to become a f***ing workout girl. Do you go to the gym? You look great. Well, thank you, but when I found out my friend got a great deal on a designer dress from Winners, I started wondering. Is every fabulous item I see from Winners? Like that woman over there with the Italian leather handbag.

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I've been trying so hard. I live with Ashley and she's just such a, like she has a routine. She cooks her healthy dinner and she works out every day and it's like, I've been trying so hard. I live with Ashley and she's just such a, like, she has a routine. She cooks her healthy dinner and she works out every day and it's like, I would just love to be one of those people. Especially because a lot of people say that like when they get sober, they replace that addiction

with like a healthy one, like working out and whatever. And I'm trying so hard to become that right now. And it's like, I will just always find it miserable. You don't love the gym? At all. Yeah, I don't either. I never understood that either because I have an addictive personality that you'll get addicted to the gym and I'm like never and i've tried so hard to like become addicted to and i'm just like it's so gross and sweaty and i'm just so lazy and i hate it i had a trainer i've had training for the house i've gone to gyms i've gone to equinox i've tried to

everything and i'm like i just those people who wake up every day and they're like i need like i want i need my day is not right without it like i would literally kill someone it's crazy no i know same i'm just like this sounds awful in every shape and form it's so but it's amazing to people who do it i just i hope there are people out there that like feel seen by us like i think they are you know what i mean i think a lot of my audience feels seen by just not being able to control my eating and just never working out i'm like they're like i feel that too it's hard god yeah we love to see it speaking of body so you were gonna get a bbl you went for consultation oh my god we have our guys we're gonna talk about this and glam i was like i want to save it. Speaking of body, so you were going to get a BBL. You went for a consultation. Oh, my God, Trisha. We were going to talk about this in Glam.

I was like, I want to save it for the podcast because. Okay. So I get, and I've always been open about this. Like, I filmed it. I vlogged it. Every time I get it, I film it for Tanagon Wild, my show on that website. But I get ass injections, Sculptra. I didn't know this.

Okay. So this is like. Oh, yeah. Injections like with the syringe. Yes. They're big ass needles and like cannula vibes and they numb you out. And I like do this once every six months and I have for years and years. And what are you injecting with?

Like. Like Resilient? No, no, no. Sculptra. It's like that's actually the like product. Okay. And it was created originally for like medical use. Like I think like burn victims and different stuff like that.

Okay. Where like if they like lost a chunk of skin they would inject sculptra and it makes the collagen like naturally regrow itself back that's cool that's really neat and so you know at the time we're like i everyone i knew was getting silicone in their ass on the fucking kitchen island and duct taping it up and like you you know yes like and i was very tempted but i was just scared like and bad shit happens people can die from that there's like so much yeah so when sculptor kind of like was popularized i was like obsessed with it because you inject it and then it makes your own butt literally grow like which is so crazy that's like a crazy thing like and it's just like that's cool i'm never gonna be yeah i'm never gonna be a bitch in the gym trying to grow

a butt i've tried it's too hard. Whatever. I love Sculptra. Yeah. And not everyone can do it genetically too. Sometimes like you just can't. They say everyone can but like not everyone can. Yeah. I just genetically have always had really like hip dips. Oh. Like you know what I mean?

What is that like? Like where it just like inverts like at your hips. So instead of being like this you just have like hip dips. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uh huh. And so I would always get them like filled and whatever.

And I don't. it's just really painful. And it's like a lot, like it's just a lot to do. And then you're all bruised up and you like can't walk for like two days. And I've just done it like once every six months for like at least five years. Oh my gosh. I just got it. Like I still to this day, like, you know what I mean? Wow.

And so, and obviously, yes, there's the conversation of like, maybe one day I'll just love having hip dips. But like, we're not fucking there yet, okay? Yeah. And so eventually I was just like interested in the idea of kind of one-stop shopping it. Like getting a BBL. Yeah. And just like sucking it out of somewhere, putting it in the hip dips and calling it a fucking day. Right.

You know, and just the pain one time and like whatever. Yeah. And so I went in for a consultation. They're expensive as fuck. How much are they now? Because mine was only, like, $8,000. Yeah. And it wasn't that long ago.

Mine was, like, $2,000. Pass me the contact. Wait. Really? I want to know. I went to this doctor that's, like, super known for, like, within the community of, like, he's done some Kardashians. He's, like, done some.

Oh, I don't know that doctor. It might be worth it if he did those kind of, you know, people. Yeah, but then Brooke was, like, going on a tangent that, like, he's not the one. So, like, and everyone has different opinions on this shit. That's what's, like, so crazy because it's such a major surgery. Yeah. It really is. You should ask La Demi because her surgeon is, like, really good.

She gave me his name and I went for a consultation. He's, like, older. And he does a lot of T-girls and, like, he's amazing but he was a dr yo vino maybe i don't remember the name but he was like twenty thousand dollars for like breast implants like a damn but yeah this guy was 50k for a bbl by the way wait fifty thousand dollars wild because you're not even getting like implants or anything like that's crazy under the knife like i and i know with him you're paying for the name and i'm not, I, I'm still like mildly interested.

Yeah. But like, oh, 50K is a lot. It's, it's not even like, yes, it's the money. Like that's an, like, and my sculpture has always been free. Like that's, maybe I just don't need to do all that, you know? Um, but I had no idea. Like, did you have a catheter? Um, no, I did not have a catheter with my, no, no.

Oh, really? I only had a catheter when I gave birth. I didn't have one for my surgeries. Really? That's wild. They told you you didn't need a catheter? Yeah. And like, how long could you not sit for? I mean, you're on a cushion. Like you, you get like a thing and you guys, you're on your side and back a lot. But like my mom would help me go to the bathroom and stuff like that. Like how long was it miserable for? But it wasn't, that's what I was saying to you. It actually wasn't. It's uncomfortable.

It's uncomfortable, but it's not miserable. I know so many people have told me it feels like they got hit by a bus. Worst pain of their life. I know people have given birth and they're like, they say it's the worst thing they've ever, ever, ever been through. Okay, wait. So are you just getting, are you going to get fat transfer? You don't have much fat to get anywhere.

I think I would do a fat transfer, yeah. From where? You really don't have it for real. I'm not just saying that. I would just tell the doctor, pick a place. You know what I mean? Yeah. Sometimes they don't have it, though. That's the difficult part is you don't have fat to take it.

But anyways, the fat transfer, it's just not like liposuction. But I guess they would take it out. I guess they would take out the fat for liposuction. I think I would do the full thing, have them suck it out. So it would be lipo and then put it back in. To me, it just really just didn't hurt. It was just numb. You're numb for like a month, but it wasn't like, I promise you, like I.

You're telling me you were. Sorry. Sorry. This combo just got so real. I literally, I like the cameras went away in my head. I was like, you're like dead ass. You were just numb. I was just numb.

I did not feel like I was hit by a truck. Geez. I was just numb. I did not feel like I was hit by a truck. Geez, I don't know. And I have a low pain tolerance just for like, you don't think? You have high pain tolerance. You think so? I've always been told I have a low pain. I'm a pussy ass bitch. I'll take lip injections, no numbing. I'll just like stick it in. Sit crazy, crazy, crazy.

Maybe I do. I don't know. I always thought I had a low. But even like breast implants. Like breast implants hurt more than the BBL. Just the tightness of it. But you should have a nose job. I heard nose jobs are the worst actually. Like I heard they break your nose. Like that's the whole thing. They did break my nose.

But I wasn't in any pain. So I think you would be okay. Because it's. But every. So many people are like a nose job was a cakewalk in comparison to a BBL. Like I've only. And maybe it's just because I've heard so many. And I know a lot of girls who do get BBLs.

Like they're in Starbucks lattes. Yeah. So it's like, how bad can it be if you've had seven? To me, it wasn't bad at all. It's just like annoying because like, yeah, you have to sit on like a cushion. Like if you're in an Uber, you have like a cushion so your butt doesn't, you know, get flattened or something like that. Did you stay in like a recovery place?

No, I was in a hotel for like a day. We were in Newport Beach and my mom stayed in a hotel with me for a couple of days. Oh, the only thing is you have to like put tarp down because you do leak, like you leak. Did you get lymphatic drainage or did you just let it leak um i had drains so it was like it was catching it and you know like empty your drains like it was catching like blood and stuff and then you gotta get the lymphatic drainage massage so i must have had that i guess yeah but it was it was a it was a quick recovery it was like a month but like i was doing stuff i was like going to the movies and stuff like that but I swear to god yeah it was I loved my experience honestly I would do it again should we go yeah I would love

to honestly we're trying to have another baby so maybe after my next surgery I'm gonna get the full like Heidi Montag just like a full thing like tummy tuck chin like everything it's so funny because when that happened I remember like I was like pretty young like younger when Heidi like did that whole thing and I remember me like that's so scary and now I'm like I want the Heidi Montag special it was everything it was so because she's like a few only a few years older than me but she was still young when she did it and I was like young I was 18 but I was like so jealous I was like god she looks so good yeah she had her huge boobs her face like everything yeah do you know her have you

been on their podcast I have not but I would love to yeah I need to like reach out I think I like Spencer Pratt and I have like commented on a TikTok or two but I also could be completely making that up right now like it sounds right but like it also kind of sounds like a lie so I'm not sure yeah um but crazy yeah I love people who just go full rogue expose you know we talked about that I feel like they kind of been low-key like you never really I think on purpose like you never hear about Heidi and Spencer that's true but like did you see Spencer's whole TikTok series? The Crystals or something different? No he like was coming for like

the hills and like being like Lauren Conrad was nothing like this and this was nothing like this and like when he would like have it behind him and he's like watching it. I gotta live for that. I lived for it. That would be me. I mean I would do that now with my old videos. I'd be like this is not real. This is fake whatever. I think it's kind of interesting like that. I love when they expose it. I lived for it. That would be me. I mean, I would do that now with my old videos. I'd be like, this is not real. This is fake, whatever. I think it's kind of interesting like that.

I love when they expose it. I don't want to do that. I expose a lot, but I want to go hard soon. You so should. I keep telling you, that's like the one thing. I just, I feel like it's so funny because I really am an open book and talk about everything, but I just have so much that I could like. Yeah. Oh, same. I feel like there's way more, like Britney Spears has her tell-all book coming out like next week.

Did you see that? Do you think she wrote it? Or do you think that she's still under something? Oh, I think she definitely, maybe she didn't, like, write it at a, like, a keyboard, but I think she definitely told the stories because the one that came out today was that Justin Timberlake got her pregnant and she had an abortion. Oh, and that's in the book? Yeah. Is the book out?

It's out next week, but she's on the cover of People Magazine right now today. So she did an interview with them. So I think she, like, actually wrote this one because she talks about the conservatorship how she felt like she was like a child like i think she i think it's pretty real and she talks about it damn so while basically while justin was basically trying to make her look like a villain like she's like going through like this like abortion she didn't want because justin wasn't ready to be a dad and she wanted the baby and it's like crazy so she's like spilling like so much tea on it oh i can't wait yeah for some reason i was like seeing shit that i don't remember what i saw

like of just people like saying that it like it probably has definitely gone through some things but i feel like she's pretty open about like the conservatorship well yeah like and if a story like that is in it like it's giving like yeah it's giving some insight to a lot of things she talks about like her grandma who was like mentally ill who like lost like her tonight but like she talks about like this huge thing where she has like mental illness in her family and why she shaved her head. She kind of goes in, I think. And then I think there's a chapter about her husband, Sam, but that hasn't been leaked yet.

So I'm into it. I'm really excited. I'm so excited. But anyways, I feel like that totally... Because you think, oh, you know, you would know everything about Britney. Everything's out there. But it's interesting when it's not. Same thing with you.

You're such an open book. But I feel like there's probably so much stuff. Because you're still trying to protect people. I love a tell-all. Like when Holly Madison released her tell-all oh yeah like what was it down the rabbit hole was that the first one? Well Huff was still alive which I love I thought that was like so good because you know people wait till people are dead to talk shit you know like Elvis and stuff but it's like do it while they're alive you know I ran to get that book and read it

immediately I love a tell-all from someone that I like yeah I've been I need to read Pamela's I have it on my nightstand I just haven't gotten around to it oh it's so good the one that just came out yeah like a year ago you should do a Pamela's. I have it on my nightstand. Oh, it's so good. The one that just came out like a year ago. You should do a Pam look this year. I think I might have to. I'm out of them, but you guys just reminded me that there's one more, so I might do it. Because I don't see anyone doing it, too. Yeah, I've never seen anyone do that. And you, without your makeup,

you're such a baby face. You would look like young Pam. It's crazy. Do you hear that shit? Just delusion. No, you're a gorge. After your makeup I was like oh my god I forget you're like 25 but you look like you're 19 without it. Trisha? It's actually wild. I'm moving in.

I think I'm just at the point where it's like I want to be here 24 7. Malibu like loves you so you would be like the perfect live-in sister. You know I'm probably taking a nap but she'll probably be up by the time we are done with this. She lives my dream life. Yeah she just If I woke up tomorrow as malibu barbie i would literally not question shit she kind of has a dream life i would be like goo goo gaga bitch we love like what's up she's talking more now she's like trying she's walking and stuff so yeah has she said the first

word yet or no she says words like ball and mama and dad like she says words but she doesn't say like sentences yeah she'll say like ball do you know the. Like she says words, but she doesn't say like sentences. Yeah, she'll say like ball. Do you know the first, first, first word she ever said? I want to say it was bubble gum. Yeah. Because she loves Miss Rachel and she would say bubble gum. She's like bubble gum. Malibu Barbie's first word being bubble gum.

Right? I think it was bubble gum. It was like three months or something. And I was like, wow, she said bubble gum. Because she just heard the song over and over. It's like icky, sicky, sicky, sicky bubble gum, bubble gum, bubble gum. And then she just said bubble gum. Yeah. Honestly, like, that's camp. See, I don't care what camp

means, that's camp. Malibu Bowers is invited to the Met. Yes, to the Gallup. I'm so fucking sad. I wonder, like, I really spend way too much of my time first of all, just, like, why am I, like, thinking about, like, your child's future? Like, Tana, literally focus on your own life. But, like, I just am so excited to see what she's going to be like.

It is exciting. It's just like in general, like you have no idea what this person's going to be and you're just like, this is very exciting to watch. Like our day is unfolding. You're like,

oh, that's like a new person. I just really like wonder like if she's going to be just like you or opposite. Yeah. You never know. It can go both ways. Like I have no idea.

I feel like now she's like a lot like me, but you know, who knows? She could be like totally private and quiet and just completely opposite. God, I hope she's just a lot like me, but you know, who knows? She could be like totally private and quiet and just completely opposite. Yeah.

God, I hope she's just like you. That'd be wild. You're like, I know. I know. It's kind of scary. That part's all scary. And like growing up in this world and global warming and all that. Yeah.

She does sing. She loves to sing. Yeah. Yeah. She does love to sing. Oh my God. If she like really loved singing, would you ever do like a song? Oh my God.

Yes. I would love it. You should do that literally tomorrow as like a pr stunt a song with mel yeah like drake sun did a song yeah her and adam just do it together yeah that'd be everything to the studio okay call drake i'm not even kidding someone needs to it's not it's not little miss fembot over here who won't talk about anything other than not showering who's your um who's your dream guest on your podcast? Did I ask you this? What about Pete Davidson? That's my number one celebrity

crush. Oh, it is? Yeah. That's my number one celebrity crush. Have you ever slid into his DMs? He doesn't have any social media. Oh, no. And at any time that he has, I'm sure I've tried. And he was on Raya for a while and I was banned from Raya and I was just like, oh, my God.

And I met him one time and just like. Oh, you did? How was it? It was so like out of the movies. Like, I don't know how to explain it. I was at it was Machine Gun Kelly's birthday party. And Pete was there because they're best friends. And they're all in a group of like a bunch of people are standing around.

And he said something about being on mushrooms or something and then i like said a sentence to him and i felt like i was like oh my god this i'm in love with this man he's so hot and i was like this is the moment it's gonna happen whatever and i won't say her name but this like beautiful supermodel walks up to like join the conversation and i just immediately watched him be like hello supermodel and I was like oh no do you think he was like vibing for the like one sentence you said to him do you think it would have been a vibe like well I don't know I don't know I like to think that we'd get along because that's so your type that's so your type physically and then he's also but he also has all those tattoos he looks a little sick like you know what i mean oh my god that man could actually run me over with a car yeah see oh my god he's gonna see it he's never no but this is what you gotta

put out there okay when i was single i'd always talk about people hoping they would see this you know what i mean because you never know like whoever like you know they see it and it's like that's why i talk about people just because i want them on the podcast like i love the weekend come on the pockets because you never know maybe someone shows him that clip and he's like i'll do that one girl's podcast even though i don't do anyone else's so maybe for me I think that works with him it's like I really actually would never want him to do the podcast right so in your case I don't want him to do me right that's what I'm saying I was making up the equivalent because I was like I think it happens like Taylor Lautner married his fan like he had a Twilight fan married that he

married she had like when she was younger she was all in Twilight gear and stuff like that. She's a I didn't, Hailey Bieber and Justin too. Like she like grew up a Belieber. Yes. I think it really happens that way and obviously they have some sort of, well actually Taylor Lautner's wife wasn't like any social media person but it's like it works out that way I think sometimes. I think you can totally be like a fan. I think Pete was probably like a fan

of like people and like how he dated them. Like he dated some really hot people. Yeah. I wonder his like mindset too though like I was thinking about this the other day because i'm literally a murderer and i never stopped thinking about like whatever anyways um you're literally a murderer like i just i'm so creepy for being thinking about this the other day but like imagine like he like there had to have been a point where he was kim kardashian he had like an out-of-body experience and was like i'm kim I'm Kim Kardashian right now like I don't know I feel like with him he's like as his

Pete I'm just Pete Song said he's like BDE you know what I mean I think he just knows he's that person in the bed so I think he just knows that you know what I mean yeah I mean I guess like like how did my BDE like snowball and I got here yeah I think when you're with Ariana Grande you're just kind of used to it at this point you're like I guess that's true

Ariana Grande is like equally as. Right. It's almost being with like Jason Momoa and then also like Leonardo DiCaprio. But just like with all those people, you're like nothing really phases me, I guess. I don't know. But Kim is wild. Kim is definitely the biggest and definitely like the most gorge for sure. So he probably was like crazy. But I get what you're saying. He probably is just like, I'm just Pete. I'm just Pete. Yeah, I get his swag. Oh swag oh god i would love and he's age appropriate you guys are like the same age i think he's about to turn 30 why do i know that what murderer no but

that's perfect i would love to be a 29 year old yeah that's that's perfect you know what i mean and i just can't find them pete davidson that's such a good one i don't know we'll see that's oh my god that would be wild oh my god speaking of creepy though we have to talk about your stalker because this is like all the thing right now too not all the thing okay first of all so it's a real stalker but people take it very like lightly around you well i is it because you have so many is it because you make light of it like what two in my life where i was like genuinely afraid for my life but obviously i did i made so many story times about it i am very dramatic as well so i think that that makes the majority of people take everything I say with like a grain of salt.

And I do think even just people around me, my friends and I are always going to be the type to make a joke out of a serious situation. So that's what I would accredit like my friends and I joking about it too. Like that's just how we get through it. You know what I mean? But when it comes to the public's perception, I do think that's why people don't take it as seriously because I'm just very drama about everything. And you know, but I feel like the stalker I have right now makes my first stalker really

look like a cakewalk, you know? He's in the same state. He's in California. He, to, to my knowledge, I mean, from what I know, he like lives out of his car, which is so much worse. Yeah. You don't know where he's at. Yeah.

Exactly. And you can't like serve a restraining order to someone who doesn't, there's nowhere to serve it to. And like the police are never going to care enough to track down someone in their car if they haven't literally already killed someone, especially in Los Angeles. It all stemmed from OF. Like, which I totally know. And even like with my agency, like I'm always telling girls like you have to, and even just

doing online shit in general, you have to be very wary of like the parasocial relationships that can create. And if someone maybe isn't mentally fully stable, they can, especially with influencers and even, you know, OF and any paywall website where you're messaging people directly, like people can really, if they're not mentally sane enough, you know, they can take that and misconstrue it to I'm dating her. She's in love with me. I love her. We know each other. Yeah. Cause they're not mentally sane enough. You know, they can take that and misconstrue it to I'm dating her. She's in love with me. I love her. We know each other.

Yeah. Cause they're messaging you and you know, I'm talking to her all day so I can come over. Like, you know, they, people just take it and do some crazy stuff. And yeah,

I mean, this is someone you messaged before. Yes. So it all started cause he was subscribed to my like, Oh F and sending messages. And then very quickly it was to me and Ashley. He was subscribed to the both of us and messaging really weird stuff. And it, like, super quickly, like, I was like, something's up here.

And, like, cut off all communication. But then it was like we were noticing, like, we'd be doing an OF live. And suddenly he made a new account. And he's back in there. And weird stuff like that, you know. And then over time it was, like, finding ways to message us on different platforms. Oh, I'm outside of your house. Look.

The pictures. Yeah. Like we lived like four years ago, we lived at this house on a hill and he like climbed the whole hill with a knife and was sending photos like, look at me. I'm outside of your house. Like that's when I first got security like full time. And then did you call the cops yes I've called the cops on him a lot of times and what do they do they can't do much right um they don't

they just don't care yeah I think there's no and I get it there's so much like insane crime happening in Los Angeles as well and like I get that you know whatever and but it is just like I've had 911 operators literally be like and you're sure it's not a crazy boyfriend after me literally like scream crying about like what's happening and i've taken the calm approach he's like hi this has happened again here's this you know and it's it is just a lot of things where it's like he would drop my favorite foods off on my doorstep and then you call 9-1-1 and they're like he left you tahini and chamoy at your doorstep what the fuck do you want us to do right Right. You know, and then. I mean, that's different than him showing up to your house with a knife.

I mean, that should be taken seriously. Or at least a picture, you know, of it. Absolutely. Just so many, so many different. Like, I could tell you a thousand instances. But it would, like, take hours where he's just shown up and done really fucking weird shit. And, I mean, the head of my security always says to me, like, Tana, I love you so much. But L.A. police. weird shit and I mean the head of my security always says to me like Tana I love you so much but LA police like and the head of my security is like he did Alicia Keys for years he's done

like so many people he's seen some crazy shit with celebrities too of like stalkers trying to hurt them or stalkers doing weird shit and he's like in all of my like time the police have never cared unless there's a body or there's uh it's wild he's in your house with a weapon you know and even then i mean i've had that happen where people are like in my house and they like literally don't they take them in and then they release them i mean this was during 2020 but they just take them in and release them it was like the scariest thing so what happened again i think we might have talked about this i don't think i've ever like shared i probably maybe shared it but someone like came into our my house when we and him were dating

where were you living? I was in Studio City in, like, the Donas. You know, like, Dona Rosa. Like, those areas. So, I was off Laurel Canyon. And, yeah. It was, like. And that's when I got.

That's when I got a security guard. Because I was just, like. So, it happened twice. And it was because of OF. And one guy came. One guy came with a gun. He came with his kid first. Then he came back with a gun.

This was on my birthday. This was May 8th, 2020. And called the cops. They arrested him. He had a gun this was on my birthday this was may 8th 2020 and um called the cops they arrested him he had a gun everything like that and he was like released that night and then another person came in while i was in the shower yeah and this was in your house just chilling he said hi he was like just came to say hi he like came up to my bedroom all it's like that and like said hi and it was like really yeah it was like really really scary so yeah for both of us at that shit like that no seriously and we were like casually dating but i just remember like i'd have to like show him proof

that this was happening because i always wanted him to come over and i thought oh he's probably just thinking i'm making this up to like have him come over but it was like the wildest time what's that to moses to moses yeah i also always think that guys think that i'm trying to be like oh my god yeah come over yeah no i'm literally terrified for my life. It happened, like, three times. I just felt, like, at one point that I just had to keep showing, like, cops at my house. Like, all this stuff like that. Be like, this is, like, real. Because I'm sure.

You know, also because I'm an exaggerator, too. So he's just probably like, you're exaggerating. And I was like, no, this is, like, so real. What did you do when he was like, I just came to say hi? Like, what was your. I ran. I ran outside. So, like, I was close.

I was in the hill. So we had, like, neighbors on our thing. So I kind of, like, ran outside. It was during the day, too. So I just, like, ran outside. There's alarms. There was in the hill so we had like neighbors on our thing so I kind of like ran outside it was during the day too so I just like ran outside there's alarms there was alarms I had a a security system not even a ring it was like a bougie security system so like the alarms went off and yeah yeah I had so many and I was just like the cameras weren't great but the alarms were and so I ran out I called 911 I called 911 so many times and they came like 45 minutes later I know that's that's what's crazy anytime like if police have ever

showed up I remember one of the last times I called 911 for my stalker. They were like, yeah, we can come tomorrow in a window between like 1 p.m. and 7 p.m. Does that work for you? And then I was like, oh, I'm leaving tomorrow. Like he just dropped off something. I was hoping you could come now. Talking to 911 like it's a nail appointment. No, you really have to.

You have to almost over. Even though it's so serious, you have to really say like I'm in danger. Someone's in my appointment. No, you really have to, you have to almost over, even though it's so serious, you have to really say, like, I'm in danger, someone's in my house, otherwise they won't come. And I remember the 911 operator was just like, so you must not care about it that much. Like, it was this bitch. And I was like, oh, you fucking cunt. Like, I was so, I was furious. I was like, there's no way. She was so mean to us, Paige. I'll never forget that day. Like,

it was awful. No, operators are kind of like that. They get attitudes. Like, just TikTok, you know, on TikTok you see 911 calls and, like, the operators can be, like, they you get attitudes like just just tiktok you know on tiktok you see 9-1-1 calls and like the operators can be like super rude and i'm sure they're like you know it's probably a stressful job but still i mean i can't imagine i think it is i just want to be a 9-1-1 operator i think it's a really cool job so like hats off to people who do that it's so hard but yeah yeah i just it was crazy like page and i were calmly talking the both of us just telling her information like not talking over each other i remember she was like one of you at a time like what the fuck like it was just

like crap I was like oh my god that's what so are you home at the time this happens where he comes by and you're like calling the cops are you like I have never like physically seen him like and it's crazy because I have I've like I've every security system like and that's what scares me too is it's like he'll he's like cheated my cameras a lot. And now I finally think my place is like camera, camera, camera, camera, camera. But it's crazy. You literally need to buy like 50 fucking cameras to actually get every angle of around your house. Like it's easy for people to like.

You need to get the ones that move. There's like 360 ones that move with motion. We also have a really good security guard. Like even when we went, he was very like, I never had security guards like that. Very like, you know, who are you? Who are you to see? Like, you know, very that. So.

They are like the best and it's great, but it's just like, it's expensive as fuck. And I would love to just lock up my house and feel safe. It's like, it's really just the mental of it all. Like anytime I'm like walking around my house alone, I noticed myself like every single day I'll be,

I'll be just like walking from my bed to my bathroom alone. And in my head I'm playing like, what if he jumped out right here and tried to kill me. What would I do? And then I always am just like having dreams and thinking about like him killing me. And it's just like so. That's all I ever thought about too. It freaks me the fuck out.

Yeah. And then you're just like do I get a weapon? Do I know how to shoot the weapon? Would I get it in time? Like am I going to get in trouble for using this? Like all that stuff. And it's the scariest thing. Living alone.

And you could live with people. But yeah being alone at your house. It's so scary.'s so scary and i lived alone my whole life and i was like terrified yeah it's so scary especially in the house so and then when you're out and stuff like that he never comes to like events you're going to be like the streamies you're publicizing that you're going he's not showing up there really yeah the streamies i did publicize i was gonna go and like i've really like now and i used to never be like this even when I had my first stalker like I wasn't as afraid to where I would still post it in real time and now I'm finally like now I won't like if it's location telling you know what I mean yeah I will if I can or if

I'm at like someone's house and it's like you know but if I'm like at a restaurant or if I'm at like a concert or anywhere like that like I'm not you never but it just scary. Like just certain random things where it's like a tour. I've been terrified. Like I really upped the security on tour. He didn't come to your tour. He didn't come to my tour. Hmm. That's.

I know that. And that's how I think. Whatever something that I think he's going to do, he doesn't do. I'm like. Have you heard from him since? Because you just finished tour like last week. Yeah. He messages me all the time.

Let's see what he said today. On Instagram? All different platforms. But you have a blog. blocked so he's going to different because i get really scared of the idea of especially in the past of my stalker like other one i felt like if i would like block him on things he would like try harder to get my attention i felt like it was like a form of acknowledgement and then i go through the battle of like even i didn't talk about this stalker online for so long because i was like will the acknowledgement feed the fire or will it like stop it or like so on and I still battle that I don't know which is better or worse well he must see it now it's so

viral like you've talked about on your podcast so he must see it right I think so I don't know it's so weird because he messages me like so much and never once like brings up that I talk about I'm trying to see what he said interesting he said he loved my Jennifer's body costume can I see I don't read them I just want to see like the look at this it's crazy like it's just like every day all day different messages on different platforms like this and then that's all fine and good if you want to do that from your house or whatever the but it's like when it crosses the line of into real life. And he's done a few that are just really scary. Like Ashley eating at her one of her favorite restaurants and him like

a picture of her doing that. Yeah, like just shit like that where it's like how do you even know she's going to be there? How long were you following her for? So he's like following once they leave the house to go somewhere. And now we have security like follow behind us. We do it all now but it's just like crazy to have to do all

that what makes this one scarier than the one you had before because the one you had before had like polaroids of you sleeping right so much crazy shit that he did over time but like he was in my second grade class like my first stalker like god and it's like it's such a long story but like shit just what happened in second grade and then in fifth grade and then in eighth grade and then it would get closer together and then i think i like blew up on YouTube and he was kind of obsessed with that. And, like, it got worse and worse and stuff like that. But even then, he only, like, came to my house twice, to my knowledge. And, like, his build as well.

Like, and I don't mean to. Body shame. Yeah. You know, I'm not. But I just. I don't want to say i felt like i could take him but he was just like this like lanky like skinny like my age like you know what i mean like i knew what he looked like as a child he was literally in my second grade class like for some reason it

was just like his name is william i was like oh william like you know what i mean like i was still terrified in certain settings and different solutions but like this is just like a big guy who's like 40 and like he like he would fuck like it's just like yeah but i don't know what it is and like and just so much of it like him like living out of his car it's like what if he feels like one day he has nothing to like lose you know and like and he knows you from of so it's like a different vibe it's like he knows the other kid know you just from growing up this he knows you from OF. So it's like a different vibe. It's like, he knows the other kid. No, you just from growing up. This guy knows you from a girlfriend experience almost. Yeah.

And that's just like, and like, I think I also feel like I could like mentally make more sense of my other stalker in the regard that like, I was like, oh, like he likes the power and he likes to get a rise out of me. He likes to hack into my phone and then I'm like freaking out and he knows that I'm freaking out about that and stuff like that mental torture I could like but I could like psychoanalyze that that's why and so it almost made more sense to me than someone who thinks that we're dating right like I think that like that level of insanity is different and scares me more yeah especially if he's not coming to like your shows and stuff like that it's very odd he would just like take, take pictures and.

Yeah, and come to my house. And especially every single time after I've moved within the first week, he'll, like, drop something off to my new house or something like that. And I, like, have. I get all my houses under, like, an alias. Like, you can't, like, look up where I live. Like, if you do, it's fake. Like, you know what I mean? Right.

Like, it's, like. So, like, you really have to, like. Like, maybe it's, like, a tracking or something. Does he have, like, tracking. You know, I saw in a movie when someone was a tracking device in the car, we have like a whole spiral about that too. Like we've just like phone or something. And then people always comment and say like, it's the top comments on canceled. Like a couple of weeks ago, we're like, what if it's one of your friends like selling information,

but like they're all like so terrified. And like the people who know where I am are like Amari who would never do that and is equally as terrified. Like, right. You know what I mean? You're close circle, but you do have like a, a people that just know you and know. Yeah. But he's just done so many things where like, if I was at like a beach house with like,

like we were at a beach house in like Malibu that we like went to for a couple of days and it was like me, Amari, Ashley, like, literally just, like, my best fucking friends. And it was, like, she showed up. And it was, like, they're the only people who know. And they're here equally terrified with me. Like, how? Do you ever, do you make it, like, not that you need to, but do you make it clear, like, this is unwanted?

Like, do you ever be like, can you stop? You have to tell them. Well, I've never told him. I've, like, said it online a million times. Like, hey, if you love me online, but you don't know me. But I feel like that's what scares me, too, the insanity of like if i'm saying that okay if you love me online but you don't know me personally yeah don't do this a sane person can register that but what if he's like i i do know you i'm dating you we're in love right and that happens

i mean that definitely happens when people think that that they're like in love with you or you're in love with them or that you owe them something because he was, you know. I just found out about this Nickelodeon star who had like, she had a really, really bad stalker for years. And I don't know if this is public information. That's why I'm not saying her name. Yeah. Because I found out like through like people and shit, but she had a stalker for like eight

years and it like got really, really, really bad. And one night for like the first time ever, she was like, I'm just going my parents house tonight like i'm not gonna go home like you know what i mean like i'm really scared and it was the same thing like he thought they were like super in love like that and that night he drove by her house he drove to her house and she was driving like the same vehicle as one of her neighbors she had like a common car and her neighbor had it and the stalker was at her house waiting for her and he saw the neighbor in the car driving like the same car as her. And he shot at the car trying to kill what he thinks was her. And then he killed himself in her front lawn.

Because it was like if I can't have you knowing. And my security has told me a story about like a celebrity he works with who had someone like come try to do the same thing. Like if you're not going to believe that we're together like yeah it happens and that's what's like actually really scary about it because it happened in the 80s the whole reason like you can't get public information you should be able to go to like the dmv and get anyone's address rebecca schaefer was her name she was like an actress the 80s and the guy came to her house he gave her flowers and she's like you can't be here like you know she's like rehearsing for a script and so she sent him away he came back she came back down again i was like you know you can't be here and you like shot her right there and she died and it was crazy yeah and they have this whole law now

because like you know he just went to the dmv and got her address so stalking is like so serious and it's like not looked at as criminal or at least like people don't get booked criminally for it 100 agree i've always thought this it's just like people look at stalking as like oh someone's just like obsessed with someone. Like it's like I feel like people almost look at stalking as like a crush gone way too far or something. That. And it's like such a serious f***ing crime. Yeah especially cops too. Every time

the cops came they're like well what do you do online and you know all this stuff like that and they blame that. Oh yeah. You know what I mean? Oh yeah. Even if I didn't say I made like OF I was just like I make videos online. They're like oh well that's what you sign up for like i recommend just deleting your social media i'm like okay well that yeah like they don't get it oh yeah i've had that conversation with 80,000 cops yeah always even i mean my security always says like even with mainstream celebrities like the police are still gonna be like fuck you you chose this life and it's so crazy it is it's wow

you do you need just 24 hour security it's like so so scary and it's almost with influencers you just they know you more than celebrities you know what i mean so of course they're going to feel that connection to you especially guys and stuff like that oh man so at this point you're not saying anything because i don't know i don't know the safety protocols like i wouldn't communicate with him obviously either but it's like what do you do you can't just keep moving yeah so you just get more security more cameras yeah more security more cameras more guns more everything do you have do you have do you have do you have protection security is like so many like it's just and they're and i love my security

because they have been my security for like four almost five years now and like they're in my house every day so we become like really like they're like family to me yeah it feels very safe like i'm so paranoid i hate going out at dark i hate and then when i came to do canceled it felt very safe like i'm really paranoid and yeah um just in general not even if I'd just be like, oh, I don't want to go out at night. But the fact that they're like right out there. Yeah. It's great.

And they can't, nobody can get by. No one can miss. And I think that's the great thing. And they just like, I really, I feel peace of mind knowing how close I am with them where it's like I could call them if one security was off a shift and I called them like they'd be there like family. Like they really, if someone was trying to hurt me, I know they would like. That's good.

That's really important. But I would just love to one day not and obviously that's on me too like I want to live in Hollywood you know I'm like interesting why you like Hollywood because I when we went to visit you and I went to dinner after it's like it's so and I used to love Hollywood but it's just like the magic's like not there what do you love about it yeah it's I'm definitely I don't feel magic there yeah but I will kind of there's like certain things like when I lived in Laurel Canyon I loved living there from like the history of it. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean?

I like that. Like the Laurel Canyon, like the doors and like Jim Morrison and all like living there. Like I thought all that, like I think old Hollywood, I find that cool. Definitely. Yes. Um, but I don't know. I'm just latest to everything. I think that's literally the main thing.

Like you're actually, you can ask page. Like I, I, I don't travel far for like anyone. You are the farthest I go for anyone ever all the time. It is amazing. And you actually come, like today you were like actually on time. I literally told them, I think you were like noon and then we got rescheduled to one.

And I said, she'll probably be here like two or three. Like that's, and then when you guys were on your way on time, I was like just starting glam. I was like, oh my God, do a quick glam.

Because the first couple times I came here, I really underestimated it. It is, it's like road trip to Trisha's. But I love it now. Like, it's fun. It's a road trip. I'm always just like I FaceTune my photos the whole car ride every single time. Who drives? Who drives you? Paige. Okay. So I love that. I don't love to drive.

You know I'm not a driver. Like he always drives now and I'm just not a driver. Well I never learned. Wait what? I still don't know. I don't know how to drive. Oh wait what? At all. You don't have a driver's license? No I don't. Have you driven a car, wait, what? At all. You don't have a driver's license? No, I don't. I just, well. Have you driven a car? I want, Trisha, I'm not even kidding you, under like 12 times. Wait, what? Yeah.

Even for your reality show, you never were like, let's just get a driver's license or something. I tried and I literally could not fucking get it. Like it's. Wait, what? It's funny because I want it so bad. I just like, it's very weird because it's so second nature to people. But like my parents never taught me like no, like none of that, like no childhood.

Like they were never, you know what I mean? Like to them, it was like, you know what I mean? Like a burden for them to like teach me to do that. Wow. And I moved out here by the time I was like 16 and then like Uber came about. And like I've always just been passenger princess in like all my friends' cars. And like eventually got to the point where I was like I need to learn but you it's very hard to learn especially in Los Angeles yeah it's so hard especially if it's like it's not like it is such

a foreign thing to me yeah do you know what I mean like I know nothing about Amari like I've taken driver's ed classes a million times I've had like private instructors like and Amari will be sitting there dying laughing at like actually how little I know. It's almost like languages. If you learn it as a baby it's easy. And I think if you learn it as like 15 16 it's like fresh. But then the older you are it's just like yeah it must be like more difficult

to like learn and stuff. And I've just never taken the time. And I like scare myself with my ADD like just like I could just see myself like being like you know what I mean? Yeah. Well, I feel like you don't really need it because you always, like, anyways are with

people so it kind of makes sense, you know what I mean? I love car time as work time. Like, I love to, like, be able to, like, do emails or edit or do anything else. Totally. But, like, I need to learn. I think just, like, knowing and having it and having the, like, idea of just going in your car to get something, but. Yeah.

It also does scare the shit out of me if I was really in a situation where like I had to like literally be the getaway driver I think like everyone would die like it's like I literally like figure it out like yeah maybe I don't know driving is crazy and also like the other thing that it gets scary I don't like to drive anywhere by myself I had never gone anywhere with just me and my daughter because I like the idea of being kidnapped like when you're getting into your car you see all those like sex trafficking things like the little tassel on your car oh my god the windshield wiper i would not i see those all the fucking time i could not the thought of being in a parking garage alone in a car at night is actually my worst so in a way that's good because like i never like he used to drop me

off at like my eyebrow appointment just because i didn't like to go any like it's scary like it's like you know just having people around or like you know kidnapping in your car or being in your backseat and for so long i was just like so drunk around Xanax 24 fucking 7 in, like, dark times of my life where it was, like, and I've seen so, it's crazy, like, too, just how many people I've seen in Hollywood who, like, celebrities, people, just whatever, like, fucked up on drugs and driving and, like, drunk driving and, like. Well, that's so scary, too. Because so many people do.

They just get in the car because they think they're fine and they're okay. And just nighttime driving is scary. I mean, people are bad drivers. You have to look out for other people. Driving is scary. At nighttime, I really don't go anywhere unless he's with me because I just can't do it at night. I don't remember. For so many reasons.

Also, people jump in your car, break your car. There's carjackings. There's actually a lot. Oh, my God. I know. And more fears to be unlocked. New fears unlocked. I love that you resonate with me on that, though.

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Your cold brew is ready at Starbucks. What? No way! Oh my God! Stop! That's the best compliment because I get scared. Yes, I love the idea. My dream is to always be recognized by someone when I cosplay and it never happens.

The biggest issue is just with Pete Davidson on SNL. She love the idea. My dream is to always be recognized by someone. I cosplay and it never happens. And Ice Spice is like the biggest. She was just with Pete Davidson on SNL. Like she's so big. And I always get nervous because I'm like, what if they're like, this is embarrassing. This is cringe. Like who's this fat person like trying to emulate me or whatever. Well, that's just your thoughts. Well, Matt Healy called her chubby.

And I was just like, oh my God, what the hell? Matt Healy called Ice Spice chubby? Yes. He said like, he called her like a chubby Asian girl or something like that. And I was just like, wait, what? Yeah, it was. And Ice Spice forgave him. And I was like, Ice Spice, something like that. I was just like, wait, what? Yeah, it was. And I spice forgave him. And I was like, I spice you're better than me.

But like, yeah, Matt Healy's the worst. I mean, I didn't know anything about her. Wait, that's crazy. He called her chubby. I was like, she's literally so fit. I was watching her and as anologist, like, damn. Leave it to me to think Matt Healy is like so fucking hot and now I'm fine. I always, I just like.

What? Because I look at someone and I, oh my God. Ew. It's like when people, it's so funny because he looks exactly like his personality would be that. Right. Do you know what I mean? Yes.

I love that kind of look. And it's like, I just want to find a guy who looks like that, but like doesn't act like they look. You know what I mean? He just gives me so much ick. And then when he said that about I spice, I was like, oh, you're so ick. That's crazy. I really love her.

She's just the best. I think there's like very few people come along where I'm just like, I love this girl. She is just, she's so different. She's such a breath of fresh air. She's so herself. I love her. She's just the best. I think there's like very few people come along where I'm just like, I love this girl. She is just, she's so different. She's such a breath of fresh air. She's so herself. I love it. I love the way she was on SNL just like shaking her little butt. I'm like, that'd be me if I was a rapper.

Like just, you know. Not little, it's a good butt. It's a nice butt. But like to her, she was in the ending monologue of SNL and Pete was, you know how they do like, thank you to iSpice for like whatever. And she was just standing next to Pete just like, yeah, yeah, just being cute. Yeah, it was just like, she was just doing her thing. Like she's just always her.

I love it. No, I can't wait to host SNL one day. I think it'd be so fun to be like. Oh my God. Wait, if you host, can I be your musical guest? Trisha, I wouldn't have it any other way. Because I think you would have more likely a chance to host because you're more popular. But I could be the musical guest.

I saw that viral tweet the other day that it was like it's 2030 and Trisha Paytas is a daytime talk show host. Oh, they are? Oh God, I would love it. I really, really. I like saw that. Like, yes, it was like a funny meme. But I was like, that's exactly what's going to happen.

Oh, my God. I can visualize. I can manifest it. I could see you in like a Wendy Williams spot. That'd be great. You know Wendy Williams only got paid $55,000 an episode? Which is like a lot, but like not a lot. Because she was kind of huge.

I would expect it to be more. Right. So she's only getting like a million dollars a month, which is like, again, huge. I'll take it. I want to do it for like the billboards. Because no one's watching daytime TV, huge. I would expect it to be more. Right. So she's only getting like a million dollars a month, which is like, again, huge. I'll take it. I want to do it for like the billboards. Cause no one's watching daytime TV, but I would totally do it to get like billboards and show for an hour. But people would watch it.

That's one thing that like is just like, I know, I know they've like tried, like didn't Liza, Koshi or Lily sing one of both of them. Lily did a late night. Did Liza, Grace had one on E.

Oh, Grace did have one on E. Grace had one. She had like Hilary Duff on her show. I feel like they took stabs at it with them, but they've, like, never done it again. I know. I know. I always thought that. I was always, like, so bitter because I'm like, but I'm funny.

Like, they should have tried it with me. I'm 100% honest to God. I feel you. But not, but you know what? Lily is funny. I think they just kind of did her wrong with, like, the writing on the show. That is what's hard. That is what's so hard because, like, yeah, like, they all have, have like put out so much funny content. Right.

And, but it's like things like that. It's like they take away all the creative direction. Right. And that's what's kind of like the tough part about it. I'm just like, oh man, I don't know. But maybe they'll give YouTubers a chance. Who was it? Someone YouTuber just went mainstream again and everyone's like, yes, maybe this is a

win for. Who was it? I've been watching, you know what I think you would really love if you haven't seen it already? Who? What? The D'Amelio show on Hulu. Okay. i'm kind of getting in my demilio era i bought the perfume i kind of love that dixie's just like wild just like i'm done with this i want to marry rich

i'm like okay girl just like speak the truth you would really fucking like their show it's like a baby kardashians is it like i can't stop watching it always okay maybe we'll start that because we don't really have a lot of shows and we were watching the kardashians and i'm over the kardashians because of the tristan story Like, he triggers me every time he comes on the screen. So maybe we'll go. That storyline is, it's my mom. Yeah, they're really pushing him as a good dad and it gets me upset. And I'm just like, okay, stop.

Yeah, I miss the old Kardashian episodes where it was like real, like Kim hitting Khloe with that purse. The purse. I mean, I never watched it, but I like that. I like the vibes. I love it. What does she say again? Like, don't be f***ing rude.

Yeah, that's the best. That's so good. Isabella's being that, my bestie. She's being that exact outfit like oh are you guys gonna recreate it she's I think she's just being that Kim I love that but she needs someone to like hit or something right honestly I'll tell her that I'll do that do it you're so you're so I love that you're so down to just do everything with your friends I just I love Halloween is like the one time a year where like people can get me like I'm like what do you want to dress up as? Let's do it all.

I was so excited. Oh my God, what do you said you were going to come for this? I was like, yes, because I love Halloween too and I don't have like anyone fun to dress up with. I know and I always,

we said it in the beginning of this episode, but I just love someone who loves it as much as me. It's so fun. And also like people don't get embarrassed. You know, some people get embarrassed. Like you get a big wig like this and like,

oh, I don't want to wear this. You know what I mean? Oh, I'm down for whatever. I love that you love it too. You were like feeling it because I feel it too.

Whenever I'm in costume, I'm like, yes. I'm finally secure enough now to where I want to do I use like I've always only wanted to do like slutty like even this it's like yes it's big hair but it's like very you know but like this year's the first year I'm like I want to be Michael Jackson and Adam Sandler I want to be Dr. Phil so bad oh Dr. Phil would be so good have you done that oh no I feel like I could have seen you doing that no I would be. No, I would. I don't like to be too ugly. Like, I like to still be pretty.

I would love to be The Weeknd with the prosthetics on his face. Like, I really want to do that look. I think that would be so cute. Yeah, I want to, like, take it there. I think maybe next year I want to, like, have a whole year where I just do only ugly, like, you know what I mean? Yeah. I feel like you should still do Michael Jackson this year.

But you're just going to be the one, like, you're just, like, regular Michael Jackson with sparkly. But you just haven't thought that through. Yeah, I haven't. And I have so many this year already where I'm, like, you know what I mean? You kind of look like Michael Jackson. Oh, my God. Do you know that in high school?

Yeah, I see it. Before I got a nose job when I had brown hair in high school. It's so funny that she doesn't know this was my trigger for years. Oh, that he was a... I'm not even literally kidding you, Trish. Before I got a nose job when I had brown hair, I felt like I looked just like, like, modern Michael Jackson. Okay.

Like, 2001 Michael Jackson or 1995 Michael Jackson. Like, just some eras. Right before, Jackson. Okay. Like 2001 Michael Jackson or 1995 Michael Jackson. Like right before like, okay. So, Oh, so like 2000, I was, I literally,

I think that when I went in to get my nose job, I was like, just un-Michaelify me. You didn't like the fact that, cause he had a good nose. I liked his nose. I thought he had good ones. I can't remember.

Or maybe I was just so pale and my hair was so dark. That's why they called you Michael Jackson. I don't know. I thought he had like his eyes a little bit. Like I thought Michael Jackson was so hot by the way. Now I'm like full embrace. Like I want the hat on. I want to like do it on.

Oh yeah. There's so many good Michael looks you would do. I feel like you should do a touring Michael Jackson when he had like the gold like body suit and like, I don't know, his sunglasses. But can I do that without a scandal? Yeah, I think so. Someone was Wendy Williams the other day. As long as you're not like, you know, I think just don't't I think you just can't change like your the color no plans on that

scandal or doing that yeah yeah yeah it is a tricky one and I think but I think you can it's like I love like Princess Tiana so I did a cosplay of her because I actually everyone's like you should be the blonde friend and I'm like but I want to be Tiana because she has like the cool dress and stuff like that so I think it's more like yeah you just don't yeah I want to be Tiana because she has like the cool dress and stuff like that. So I think it's more like, yeah, you just don't. Yeah. I want to be Peppa Pig really bad because that's my, like Adam Sandler, Peppa Pig is my other obsession. But then your head's like this the whole time because it's always profile, right? Oh my God. I was just thinking regular pig prosthetics, but what if we really took it there?

Yeah. You have to be profile. Wait, if you're, well, if you want to do regular piggy, she's like Miss Piggy. I love Miss Piggy. I never did her. I want to do Miss Piggy. That was my trigger as in school. People called me Miss Piggy, but now I love her. She's fabulous. People literally tweet me all the time that I give them Miss Piggy. I love Miss Piggy. I never did her. I wanted to do Miss Piggy. That was my trigger in school. People called me Miss Piggy, but now I love her.

She's fabulous. People literally tweet me all the time that I give them Miss Piggy, but I love it. Miss Piggy's fun. That makes me feel better because I was just like, I'm fat. They're like, Miss Piggy. Yeah, she really like, you know, she's camp. We go to the Met Gala just as Miss Piggy. And that's why

I'm never going to go because I would just do some shit, you know. But I saw Doja Cat vaping at the Met Gala this year. I felt so seen. Well I think she's uninvited. I don't think she's invited back after that. That's what I mean. Oh man. Doja Cat was so cool until she kind of went off the deep end. I really liked her too.

I'm torn. I'm like a little behind it. But I love some weird dub are they Illuminati or not shit. Yeah. Well she had a shirt where she had like a neon you can bleep that neon on her shirt but then she was like I didn't know it was and I get that maybe she said she's like the shirt I can see that like you don't know who's on it I didn't know who it was I know I like her too I don't know but then I hear she's problematic but then I'm problematic so I shouldn't judge anyone sometimes when I hear people are problematic

like oh I don't want to be and I don't Maybe. Because I really want to be on the podcast. And I was like, ooh, no. But I'm like, wait, I'm so problematic. Like, why would I say no? All my stuff in my past, me judging. I'm that girl. I mean, it definitely depends. I'm like that, too. I pick and choose with my, like, problematic. Like, you know what I mean?

Some people problematic. I love some people problematic. Well, that's what you were saying earlier. I was like, you know, there's certain people that I'm just like, oh, like, I wish I could like them. But because of, like, that one problematic. There's certain things I have, like, a stance on where I'm just like, I have to hold to this. Even if they've grown and stuff like that, you know.

There's certain. But I don't know. I can be judgy sometimes. I try to let it go. I try not to judge people. I feel like lately every time I see you in a video talking about something, you're like, I used to be judgy about this person. But now I love them. Like, you have really transformed.

Thanks. I do. Even the D'Amelio. I was like, oh, my God. I was so hard on them. Remember the snail gate where, like, she, like, ate a snail and peaked. And I was, like, so mad about it. I was just like, F you, you snobby. I was. Even the D'Amelio was like, oh my god, I was so hard on them. Remember the snail gate where she ate a snail and peed? Yes. And I was like so mad about it. I was just like, F you, you snobby. I was like so mad.

It is so funny to look back and be like crazy. Like over a snail. Yeah. Like, you know what I mean? Over a snail, yeah. And now she's just like, I love her too. She has like, no, she does not care at all in this. She really doesn't give a fuck through Dixie and I like that about her. She's just like, I'm over this. Like, give me a rich man. I'm like love that you know and Charlie's just like

the sweetest little angel yeah she seems like cool and I like love that they just have their own show she's funny too like Charlie yeah like I've had a lot of experiences with her like when we're just like talking Dixie too where they're like quick like funny and I'm like damn I like I've ever seen them talk was on the views podcast yeah it's so awkward and weird but I'm gonna blame David on that one I I mean their brand is huge and you know what I mean like they're they protect certain things but like person to person like I really do like I think they're their whole family I love I love it too I love the parents because they're not fucking weirdos like I oh my god like poor Addison yeah it's just sad he's still out there doing tiktoks we talked

the other day yes he still makes tiktoks because we're like wait what happened to him and then we went like oh my he's still doing like cringy no motherfucking way he's not getting as much like attention but yeah that's lilo was just talking about him on stage at my show and i remember like thinking to myself i was like damn what where that's crazy i thought he stopped yeah no he's still out there doing it i was like oh man and you kind of have to feel bad you know you're just like damn and she's like yeah she's like you know in the movie and stuff like that i love that i love all them yeah i it is i think it all just came out of place of like jealousy like you know charlie blew up so big and i think like even though i was like 30 i was still

like jealous i'm god i wish i was 16 years old like blowing up you know it's like a whole la and especially that time you know you like now you were you're doing your thing and you're chilling but yeah when you're surrounding yourself with people who care so much about numbers, like it like can fuck with your head really, really heavily. Yeah. The older you get to, it's just like, oh man, you're not keeping up with this and this. And I feel like, you know, I feel like for so long, even when you came around, I was just like, so it was almost envious.

I was just like, wow. Like, I wish I would have like popped off when I was young. I wish I could have had even like TanaCon. I you know all this stuff like that I was like wow she's like getting all these opportunities your reality show and it's like you know you compare yourself and then you're getting older and like oh I'll never get that I'm aged out I'm this and it's so funny because like I at that time I was doing the same thing to TikTok stars or whoever just like the new you know what I mean just like your brain just starts to do that especially when like your job and your worth and your job is placed numerically.

Yeah. You know, it's, like, it's very weird. Well, you know. It is great to be, like, at my age now where it's, like, there's no way I'm going to compete with, like, an Alex Earl. Not that I would have with you either, but you know what I mean? You're just, like, not competing anymore. Well, and you just, like, eventually learn that it's, like, that. Like, you know what I mean?

Yeah. Like, fuck that mind state. Like, I am me. And it just, it is what it is. And, like is and like comparison is just always like the root of all evil I remember like when I parted ways with someone I'd worked with for a very long time like in the industry well I mean I guess I can't even fucking say it like that when I parted ways with my old manager there were rumors going around that he was managing this girl and I'd heard through the grapevine and I don't know if he said this and we're so cool now. So I'm not like coming at him at all,

but I had, he started managing this girl who was coming up on Tik TOK and I had heard through the grapevine that he was calling her new Tana. And I remember, and it was like, it hurt so much cause it was like someone that was so close to me saying that. Right.

And it made me just harbor this, like, horribly intense negative feeling towards, like, all of that. And then I, and not even just towards her, towards the whole situation, but, like, in a way, yes, like, I'd see her videos, and it's, like, at one point I loved her content, but I would, like, want to skip it because it was, like, I, the feeling towards that.

And then eventually I got to know her, and she was amazing, and, you know, now it's, like, we both just have our own careers, and we slay, and, like, whatever. But it's just so funny how much shit like that can get in your head oh yeah I think I had you muted for like a long time because I was just like oh my god you're doing like everything I want to do I'm like let me just not because it's so and this is like a while ago but just like he does that's so funny I've always felt that way about you well I do absolutely nothing I sit at home at my house no no like you you just underestimate like how viral

and iconic you are well Like, you really do. I really do, because I don't see that at all. I look at other people, and I used to so much, I look at other people, but as coming from someone who would, like, get your managers after you, and I don't know if it was, like, I don't feel like it was inadvertently, I just, like, met them through you, and I didn't know any managers, so I was just, like, hey, like, do you want to, whatever. And if they're willing to take me on, just like I said

about all the brands and whatever, then they're willing to take you on, like, we're, we're. But the problem is then, they're, like, well, Tana made this much and Tana did this. And I was just like, then it made me start feeling bad about myself. Like with OF, they were telling me you made so much. And I was like, oh my God. Like I was not making that. And that's just crazy.

Like even that. Like that's crazy. Yeah. They would like. Like sharing how much money. Like that's. That's true. That's so f***ed on both of us though.

Like it's. And it's. No, but that's. Yeah. Like that's just like. That's f***ing absolutely crazy. Yeah. Because it was. It was so nuts. And then then I just couldn't I just ended up feeling bad about myself and then I became in this place of desperation where I'm just like okay I gotta do this I gotta

do this to keep up and it's just like just not having to keep up with anyone it's just like a nice and it's just you know when you finally just realize it's like not about that but it's so hard because for so long same way like I just I felt the same way and I feel like you're just in your own category because there are so many girls that are alike. There are so many that there's, like, a dime a dozen of. So it's, like, that probably was even harder. But you're, like, in your own category where I feel like you can't be really compared to, like, an Alex or, like, who else? I don't know who else.

I really appreciate you saying that. Well, it's true. Because I, like, now I finally feel secure that I'm just doing me and whatever fucking happens happens. But I spent so long where it's, like, all I would do. Comparing numbers. Comparing this. Comparing that. Especially with with YouTube I think that oh the worst TikTok it's like there's millions of fucking videos and it's whatever you don't see views as much yeah there was a point in time when it was like you and me and Jeffrey and Shane and David and Jake and Logan

and there were there was just like a select few YouTubers that also kind of were YouTubers but personalities outside of them whatever and like all you would do is is my thumbnail as good as There was just like a select few YouTubers that also kind of were YouTubers but personalities outside of them or whatever. And like all you would do is, is my thumbnail as good as theirs? My title as good as theirs? As many views. Oh my God. Views per hour of the videos.

It was crazy. How many views did that person do in one hour? How many views did I do in an hour? We like make fun of people for getting 300,000 views. Like not me, but the people I was around. No, but I get what you're saying. Like it was like such a thing. And then it made you just, it made me fucking crazy.

It was awful. And i look back now at so much shit that i remember being like i remember like sitting in my room like i am a fucking failure i need to go be a waiter tomorrow i'm a failure i am horrible what i do like no one gives a fuck about me and it's like i look back at that video and like a video will have like three million views and it's like i was sobbing over a video that like like that's so nuts it is crazy because especially at the height of like Shane he was getting like 20 30 million views and you're just like I will never get that and I was like his friend at the time so I was just like I don't know what I'm doing I felt embarrassed and because like you know he'd make fun of people like not getting views not make fun of you know people like oh my god they only get

50,000 views and you're just like what and then you're like okay that's gonna be me that is me it happened to me you know what I mean it's just that's exactly how I felt with like Logan and David again and then they were like I love Logan so much but I mean David as well like like I don't love David as well but I'm saying David as well at the time was my great like my friend but it's like you you still like even though they're your friends yeah like you're just comparing yeah yeah feel some type of way for sure and you didn't get the views you just thought well like you know I don't hold up like I'm a piece of shit at yeah my whole job and career and everything and it's like it is wild to think that like tana why were you comparing your vlogs to logan paul's or two completely different fucking

videos yeah that to me is interesting you know because i never would have compared like i always tried it mine was like gabby or something you know it's like oh well you know if we're getting the same amount of views i'm getting more views okay that means i'm doing better yeah there was a there was definitely an error in the beginning of my career with like gabby because she would do the story times where i'd be like comparing i forgot oh you guys were like master story time together you guys be the mikinos we're like okay together we're doing stuff i was like oh my god powerhouse is here yeah we tried to really i love it you came together yeah we did we did and like we had some fun moments yeah no i always i'm always like i hope she's good like you know what i mean she seems

yeah yeah anyway did you you watch Logan's fight? I did. What'd you think? On the edge of my fucking seat. Was it? Okay. I don't even, I don't know where to watch these things. I don't know why.

I'm also. No, it's like a whole fucking thing. Getting it even on the TV. Like I, I always come crying to Amari if I want to watch a fight. I'm like, can you please put it on the TV? So you're a boxing fan. I love to watch it. Wait, really?

Oh my gosh. Jeff was like trying to go into this and I was like, I don't even, because with Jeff here trying to sell it, it's like, oh, shut up. Right. You know what I mean? But I love it because the drama. Yeah. Like the drama of the way that these like people come at each other for months and months

before the fights and air out their whole lives. And then it feels like this final moment where it's like there's a winner and a loser and the people putting their whole reputations on the fucking line. So is it real, that build up then? Or is it literally just to create tension for the fight I think both like do you think like Logan was affected by I think yes I think that like Logan hadn't in my opinion like you know I mean he I don't think he ever thought signing on to that fight with Dylan Dennis that it would go so personal against someone he loves so much I also think Logan is the type of person that like if it was at him he can take anything but like at someone he really loves and cares about that had to have it was all about her

and like nothing about him yeah and I think and then it's like you know on the fight day he's saying like I forgive you Dylan and I'm here to do my job and I'm not gonna let my emotion get into it but it's like you've gotta be like at least i would be like you know what i mean like fuck you but it was always set up right for dylan to lose like it's set up no it's not it's real i don't think so because i mean they made it obvious he was like the villain through this whole thing everyone like i didn't even follow him and i just saw like every tweet that's just how dylan dennis has always been okay like as a fighter he's just never fought someone where i think he was coming for them and people cared right you know what i mean so he's always just been like that person yeah that like troll do you

know him like no he he like brought me into one of his little trolling schemes once and that's the only way would you do he was like gonna fight jake or something and i was like drunk out at the club one night and i was taking this was like just a very different time and i was taking photos with a bunch of people and he came up, I didn't know him from like Adam or even he was like, can I take a photo? And I'd just taken a photo with someone else so I posed and then he was like tweeting it like, got your girl, like blah blah blah, all this shit and that was how

I found out who he was. So I think that's also why, and I love Nina, like Logan's girl so much so I was very much like you know. Sad, oh like pro her yeah. Yeah and like, yeah Logan beat his ass. Oh my gosh, that's wild. I know Ava, do you know Ava Louise? Yes yeah yeah and like yeah logan beat his ass oh my gosh that's why i know ava do you know ava louise yes she like totally like outed him like i guess she hooked up with him and she was like dude she's wild she's wild she is just like does not care she

doesn't give a talks about everyone and i think i was like a little bit like that so i have a little soft spot for her because i feel like maybe not maybe i was i don't know but i used to like talk about like every single person i hooked up with and I'm like wow people and like looking at it now you're like oh my god that's so wild but I guess I did that too oh yeah I've done it just like name dropping yeah like shut up Tana there's a few where I could have just shut the fuck up yeah it's it's wild but she was talking about like I guess she hooked up with Dylan Dennis and she doesn't have like a podcast or something who's your dream person to dress up with? This is going to sound like such a lie, but like today, I'm not kidding you. Dressing up with you was like my absolute dream. No way.

Because like, again, like you just love this shit. You're a fucking icon. Like we finally did it. I never, I like, I never thought we'd like get to do a matching costume. And like, I can't think of anyone else I have wanted to dress up with more than you literally today like the best roller coaster of my life I'm not even kidding you I love you it's so fun and I'm never like it never like exhausted it's always just like wow what a whirlwind yeah that's why anyone will be so lucky to date you because you are just like so fun and you're so sweet and you're so pretty and minus the farting like you're a 10 you're like a 15 out of 10 and then the party brings you to 10 out of 10 i need everyone to see me how you see me i need everyone to see me how you see

me and i hope you know how much they call you like what you were on whitney and she called you like the marilyn monroe of our generation and i'm like that's a huge compliment is delusional no she's not i feel like she's never like that nice i mean she's nice but she is so nice to me to the point oh okay i don't know you and whitney like there are certain people like that where it's like I love. Because I'm the same way. Bitchy energy and I have my soft spots and the people I love. People like you and Whitney always just, it warms my heart to see someone love me that much. When if you didn't like me, you would make it known.

But that's not, we speak for everyone. It's not just me, it's not Whitney. There's this whole, we're older than you too. It's seeing that in you and seeing this young know, it's not just me, it's not Winnie. It's like there's this whole, we're older than you too. It's like seeing that in you and like seeing this like young girl like be this like star and just like the it factor. It's amazing. I love you so much, Trisha Paytas. And like every single compliment that comes from you is like the highest honor because

I love you so much. I love you. And like, I really just like, you're my twin. You're my fucking, you're my girl. That's the best compliment ever. Cause I look at you and I just see like, wow, just star power in so many ways. No, you and I are the same. People talk about you.

No, I mean, people just, there's a light. People talk about you. People love you. Girls love you. People talk about you and people love you. They do. No, no one's talking about me. I'm in my basement making a podcast, but you know what I mean?

It's everyone talking about you. I don't think you understand how many conversations I have in my day-to-day life with people like about how amazing you are on tour I was telling you this off off the podcast but like if I even say your name on stage like I'm putting the mic down so people can cheer for like a minute I wish I could have been there for that because I never experienced that even at my own shows I'd love to just be like yes bitch she's just no when's your LA show are you guys gonna do an LA one we will eventually do an la show and i would love for you to be there and had i known that you would have even remotely implored the idea of coming to san diego i will invite you to all shows within that mile radius we love san diego we always go down there for like sushi we drive for food sushi in the

canceled podcast tour let's go we would have been down there in a heartbeat i was so sad that it happened that day before and brooke was like it just happened i was like oh my god i would have come i just like i always am like oh my god i don't want to bother you but i will you were invited to everything i do forever i know you're like to the halloween party which is very nice and i was just like oh my god there's so much anxiety like we had a whole conversation where they were like invite trisha to the halloween party and i was like you guys i know her it starts at 10 p.m she's gonna be so like she's gonna she just won't want to be around so many fucking people who will probably be there. I just know,

you know, so many people and I just have so much anxiety and like one side of beef with so many people that I'm just like, I don't want to, you know.

My parties do, they stress me the fuck out and that's why I was like, and they were like, just invite her and I was like, I will, I'm going to give her

the courtesy invite but I would bet my foot she's going to skip this one out. Isn't that funny? And I always, I usually like hate like, usually that's when I like ghost. I get in trouble for like

not responding back because I don't know how to respond because I hate saying no to people yeah um so you should get an invite and it's like like a week later I'll be like oh my god I just saw this I love and I just saw this I love and I just saw this but like I love I hope you know we have the friendship where you could literally just be like bitch no and I'd be like well no but we have the friendship where you know that I can't come out at 10 o'clock at night with a bunch of influencers not at all even if I was 20 20 years old, that would give me anxiety. Like, it would be crazy.

Yeah, honestly, it's giving me anxiety. Do you get sponsored? Are you getting, like, paid? I'm doing it with that guy. The, like, Russian guy. So he's just, he's just, we're doing our thing. And it's going to be fun. And you didn't buy it.

And I'll come give you the recap. Yes. Oh, my God, please. I will. And I'm excited. Oh, my God. Please come back in November. When can we schedule it, Paige?

Can we write down when? She's great. The scheduling. I was like, I gave her dates, and I was like, October 17th, I'm like, perfect. She is the absolute god I would be dead without her, and I will reoccur right here as long as you want me to reoccur right here.

I want to get the recap on the Halloween. I want to get a recap on the Halloween party. At any time in life, too. We gotta break this down over some Barbaritas. Yes. Or at least just that Chili's. Oh my gosh. Barbaritas. We need to do a Madonna in. Let's invite Holly. It's so funny. Holly does not watch. Oh my gosh, Barberitas. We need to do a Madonna in. Let's invite Holly. It's so funny. Holly does not watch.

She's like, no girl, what? No, we're going to try. Honestly, maybe, maybe she will. It's so funny because every time I leave here, I leave here with a million

new plans with you and we're actually executing them. Like last time, we were like, let's be fembots. No, I'm actually shocked because you're so busy. So I was just like,

oh my gosh, because last, yeah. Never too busy for you. I was, I was shook that this happened and you're like so punctual, so on time. I was like, oh my God, this is so great. I love it. Absolutely never, ever too busy for you. Oh my gosh. Cause like, yeah, it's never too busy for you. I was, I was shook that this happened and you're like so punctual. So on time.

I was like, Oh my God, this is so great. I love it. Never, ever too busy for you. Oh my gosh. Thank you for having me.

Thank you for coming. Oh my gosh, you guys. Trisha Paytas. Keep it coming for Trisha Paytas, bitch. God damn it. I love you.

I love you too. That was great. Oh my God.