Keep it Positive, Sweetie - 2-Year Anniversary "Listener's Choice: Higher Is Waiting w/ Tyler Perry

Episode Date: June 8, 2025

As we celebrate two years of Keep It Positive, Sweetie, we are running back some of your favorite episodes. This week's episode is none other than my dear friend, Tyler Perry. Known to the world as a visionary, humanitarian, director, actor and writer, Tyler shares life lessons as he's navigated many ups and downs. If you're new here, WELCOME!!

Hey, sweeties, it's Chris Renee Hazlett, and you're about to hear a special re-air of one of the most powerful episodes we've had on Keep It Positive, sweetie. The one and only Tyler Perry sat with me and shared his journey with a level of honesty and intention that shook so many of us. From his early struggles to building an empire with faith and vision, his story and his words lit a fire under this community. I've heard so many of you say that this episode gave you clarity, courage, and confirmation to keep going. Whether it's your first listen or your third, Tyler's story is

the kind that hits different every single time. Hello and welcome to this episode of Keep It Positive, sweetie guys. I am so excited about this episode. I have none other than my boss, the biggest boss, multi-hyphen. You are an author, you are a writer, a director, a philanthropist, a father, everything. Tyler Perry, my God. Hey. Hey. How you doing?

Like I literally feel like this is my first time doing this. I was so nervous. I couldn't like. That's so crazy. Cause we talk all the time. All the time. Isn't it crazy? Yeah.

I just wanted to make you proud and do this right. I'm already proud. I'm already proud of the other episodes. I'm proud of the title. You got to tell me how that came about. Okay. Yeah. Keep it positive sweetie.

Yeah. Keep it positive. How'd that come about? It came about because I had a young lady, I actually had posted a young woman's work who helped me organize my closet. And this woman got on, she was like, all this bragging and boasting, you need to go buy some land or a house. I said, I had time.

Normally I ignore, block, delete. Oh, we got time today. My little fingers got the turntin' and I was like, I said, what you should look is I'm supporting another woman's business and not looking at it from a negative standpoint. I just put hashtag keep it positive, sweetie. And it grew legs.

My fans were like, it just like literally went crazy. Denora, we were trying to come up with a title for the podcast and she was like, every time I think of you, I just think of abundance. And in that moment, I was like, at the back of my head, I said, what if it's not always like this? Yep, abundant. Well, like what if my life isn't, it was crazy.

But I just got chills thinking about it. And- What if your life wasn't always- Isn't always like this. Isn't always- Because abundant, she's like, every time I think of you, I think of abundance. And a part of me was like,

but what if it's not always like this? Mm-hmm. And I- You know where that came but what if it's not, it was like this. You know where that came from. Okay, we can get into that. We can definitely get into that, yes. That is clearly just that unfettered fear from childhood of something that somebody said to you or something that somebody planted in you

that immediately make you think this isn't gonna last always. And that is a horrible, horrible sinking sinking feeling and it's also a lie. Mm-hmm. But it can serve you well. Yeah. Because it can motivate you to keep going and work even harder. Yes.

So that's what I used it for. Yeah. I used to hear it. I don't hear it no more. I don't hear it no more. I bet you don't. I don't hear it no more. I think I'm alright now. You are. You are alright, honey. You are alright. So we were brainstorming and I was like,

you know, I want to do a little segment on the show called Keep It Positive, Sweetie. And they were like, that's the name of the show. The name of the show. And that's how it came up with it. That's great. I don't like addressing haters, but that's good. I'm glad something great came out of it.

It did, yeah. Because people, you know, in social media in this world, they're sitting around, nothing to do. And what you have to understand about people who post negative things like that, the algorithms in social media, if you click on something negative, you're only gonna get fed negativity.

So the negativity is showing up in their lives within other things. And if you keep letting that stuff in, everything negative, everything negative, everything gossip, everything this, your life is going to become that. So I'm very much about keeping it positive, sweetie, and staying clear of all of that foolishness.

Yeah, you do a really good job of that. I try to, I try to. I don't let it in. I'll stop if somebody starts talking about somebody in front of me, gossip, we don't do that here. You can cut it off quick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love that about you.

That's why when I know they talking about me, you're not gonna let them talk about me. No, no, no, no. Same, I'll fight somebody over you now. No, no, no, somebody tell me somebody's in trouble. You will. If somebody's in trouble, if you're telling me something

because there's a situation that we need to help, that's different. But not just to help, that's different. But not just to be, no, no. If you ain't got no solutions to what people are going through, no offering trying to help, don't bring that to me. Nope. That's real. I love that.

I love that. I want to do a little story time. We're going to go back to when it first started. When I first started working in Tyler Perry Studios as a PA, the first thing they told me, do not look at him in the eyes. Don't speak to him when you see him. No dude, I was like, okay. And I don't even know, what year was this?

Cause I don't know. 2012. I don't know who. Going into 13, we started having have nots. Who was starting all this shit? It's crazy. Can I say shit on keep? Yeah, absolutely. Okay, who was starting all this shit?

Because I hear rumors too, but then, oh, oh, don't look, don't talk to, don't oh, don't talk to... I'm like, where does this come from? I don't know. Somebody told you that? Yes. That was a part of my getting the ropes, learning the ropes. So if you ever see him, don't get on the elevator. And it reminded me of Capitol Hill.

When I worked on the hills, if you see a senator on the elevator, do not go on. If they're on the train going to the Capitol, wait. And I had an Obama incident where I was running trying to get some papers to the floor of the Senate. And he was on the train and I was trying to get on there real quick. And I saw him and I ran back. He said, come on. I was like, you sure?

He's like, yeah, come on. I was like, thank you. Out of breath. I was like, Lord, but it reminded me of that where there's certain rules. I was like, maybe that's just a thing. So one morning we were walking. Everybody points out, okay, that's where his office is. This is where catering is. I'm like, okay. And maybe a few weeks in, we were walking, everybody points out, okay, that's where his office is, this is where catering is.

I'm like, okay. And maybe a few weeks in, we were walking past each other on the sidewalk. You were going to sit and I was going to get some coffee probably for someone at that point in time. And I just said, just speak. That's how you raise. You don't walk past people, you acknowledge people when you see them. So I just said, good morning.

And you spoke back and I was like, it was like a movie. Like if somebody had like a camera, it would have been so funny to see my reaction. I'm like, he spoke back, and I was like, it was complete opposite of what everybody said. I know, and that's why I wanted, like in the beginning, I was like, that's why I forced people to say hi now, because I see them walking up, I'm like, hey, how you doing?

You all right? Because I'm like, if somebody's still telling y'all that, that's not so, because I check in, I want to know how people are doing. And I'll stop in the hallway and talk and see, you know, how's your mom? How are things going? You will, yeah. Complete opposite of what I was told. And I just, I love that it was the complete opposite.

I'm just thinking Capitol Hill to here. Okay, go ahead, go ahead. I ain't, it's not lost on me. Go ahead, go ahead. And then I worked my way up and a lot of people are always like, how did you and Todd become so close? How did you even start working for him? How did that even happen?

And do you remember when we were doing SoulCycle at Greenbrier? And I came up to you and said, we need more money for the costumers. And I was so scared because we hadn't really, it was always just, good morning, sir, keep it moving. And something was like, just tell him, because he has no idea. And you, I'm talking about within hours, accounting was up in that department, figuring out how we can get more money

to get more people in to help us, because the way we shoot, we needed some good, good help. And you were like, literally, you were like, we'll make it happen. Yeah, because there's the thing that people forget. I can't see everything. I can't be everywhere. So it takes somebody bold enough to say,

hey, you're working, we're all working side by side. We're working really, really fast. We need the help. And not everybody would do that. And there'll be people in departments who are suffering, who are shorthanded because accounting saying no, or this other person saying no, nobody's told me. Yeah.

Yeah. So I was- I was glad you said it. Yeah, you made me feel very comfortable. I was like, okay. And I don't, sometimes you're like, Chris, why you didn't say nothing? I'm like, I don't know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like I just sit back. But that was the thing where I was like, I need to talk to him. I was so scared. And that was just another instance where you literally was like, so cool. Like if people look at you,

cause you're 6'6", you're like this giant. It's like, oh gosh, how do I even approach this man? You approach everybody like, hey. Hey, sir. But that was just another testament to how you just make things happen. And you're very open. When people make me aware of it, yeah, because it's really important to me. Working that hard.

That's what so many people love, working at the studio, because we move. We do. But we are still together. I'm right there with them side by side in the trenches. So it makes it all just, we see everybody pushing in the same direction. That's why we've been able to do what we do. Absolutely.

And it starts with you. Cause I remember even as a PA, just coming on a set sometimes and we're all exhausted. Everybody's working these hours and you're right there with us from sun up to sun down. And it's like, this man ain't gotta do this. No, no, no. At all, you can literally be on your island

or one of your properties. Somewhere, nope, I don't have to be here. Literally. But I love it. It's inspiring though because it made me go harder. And I was like, okay, if I see this man who's already made it and doesn't have to do this, work this hard, I really gotta go hard.

And it just inspired me. And you did. I did. Started working for me and Crystal running behind me with my shoes. Going on GMA, we're here. Somebody's schedule, we should show them something to schedule, something we just have to do. It was insane when I'm promoting a movie or something. And there you are we're up

up going to bed at three up at up at 5 30 getting things ready in a zoo yeah you got big feet too so the shoes was heavy but but you know the thing the thing about it though that really moved me is just how much you honored the job and what you were supposed to do that to me spoke volumes because anybody who comes in and just, you know that their passion is what they're doing. I didn't even know you had another dream. No, you didn't. I had no idea you had another dream.

Tell them about the audition. I had auditioned for a role on If Loving You Is Wrong, and then also for Erica on Have and Have Nots. Actually, it was Darcy on If Loving You Is Wrong, and Erica, who played, she was one of the young ladies on Have and Have Nots. Actually, it was Darcy on If Lovin' You is Wrong, and Erica, who played, she was one of the young ladies on Have and Have Nots, I auditioned for those. Didn't get any of them. You are working with me every day, holding my clothes, went through the proper channels

to audition, and didn't get the role. No. And when you asked me to style you, because that was when I was just like working in costumes, Tyler, I would literally, we would be in Greenbrier, my agent would send me an audition, I would run upstairs, find something in the back, back, remember we used to have that big warehouse behind the costume department upstairs? I would find something that fit that character, change into it, run downstairs, tape it, run and get lunch, run upstairs, change back, go back to work. Literally like grinding, trying to figure it out.

Even auditioning for stuff for you. And once you asked me to be your stylist, I was like, this man don't think I can act. And I had no idea. You had no idea. I had no idea. I thought that was a way of saying, you can't do this, but I got something else.

But come hold my shoes. Yeah, hold my shoes. Come hold my shoes. Let me show you the world. No, no, no, no. No, but I had no idea because nobody ever told me. And I don't know why nobody told me that you were auditioning. That's crazy.

That is crazy, yeah. Until Sisters, when you, again, because this should speak to anybody watching about having the boldness to speak up. Like the boldness that started us talking with you saying we needed help. The boldness of you actually getting the role of Fatima started with you saying I really would like to try to do this. Yeah, I'm like, oh Okay, first time I'm here and I'm thinking and I remember I told you yeah. Yeah, I'm not gonna give you anything

It's gonna be small and what you do with it is yep If I give it to you better kill it you better kill it and I was like I will not gonna give you anything. It's gonna be small and what you do with it is. Yep, if I give it to you, you better kill it. You better kill it. And I was like, I will not let you down. And the first day, I remember you shooting in a blue dress on Sisters and I remember all of it. Was it blue or black? But all I remember is all of the crew coming for wardrobe.

Just to support you. Yes, it was so beautiful. Yeah, but that tells the world the kind of person you are. That all your think Think how many of them co-workers gonna go to support you or something all your co-workers came down and when you finished their scene They were all applauding yelling. We all did jump. It was I haven't actually have footage that still my phone Oh, you should put that in. Yeah Who wants to be an actress and she just got casted for her first role at Tyler Perry Studios with dreams come true Yeah, Priscilla! Get them, Brian.

Get them. Get them. Get them. Get them. Get them. All right. All right, all right. But what's beautiful about it is I sat in the corner going, hmm, oh no, no, no, that's something else.

That's not just talent, that's not just acting, that's something else, that's something that is anointed, that is special, that is called for that particular purpose. And I'm always looking for that. So when I saw it I was like okay I see same way with Cassie and LaVann we were on tour and I'm in a Madea costume ready to go on stage and I looked at them sitting over the corner I said I'm gonna do a sitcom with you two. Wow. We're gonna do House of Pain. I gotta go

hello walk out on stage. Yeah and we did House House of Fame, you know, all those episodes. All these years later, it's still going. Yeah, yeah. I hope my show does that. I totally, 100% believe it will. And whatever it is, if it doesn't, you're gonna be in abundance. Amen. Won't he do it?

Won't he will? Say, won't he will? Hey, I love that. And even when I called you that day, I was still styling you to ask you about, just to let you know this is what I wanted to do, just to speak to who you are as a friend. You were backstage getting ready to go on to do your farewell tour. I thought you had the day off because there were so many days that the calendar was really

small. So I was like, okay, he off today. So I called you thinking you were off and you weren't. And you literally answered the phone and I was like, hey, what are you doing? And you're like, I was just sitting backstage waiting to go and I was like, oh, I'll call you back. You know, what's up? Yeah, and I was like to you. I like you don't know this but I'm reading the scripts and it's literally the stories I just jumping off the pages and I was like I really want to give this a shot and you were like I love this idea. Yeah, let me call you back. Yeah, what I'm done is then

I got to walk on stage. Yeah, But the fact that you took the call, you know what I'm saying, that speaks to like, that's just the type of friend you are, because some people are like, oh, I called him back, but as busy as you are, even when you're working, you still make time for your people. I just want people to know that that's who you are. Okay, good, good, good.

Because that's like, a lot of people think that you're just, even they don't know you on a personal level, they just see this huge giant man who just does so many great things and is so talented, but like on a real personal note, you are really that you're available to your people. I appreciate that. And I love you for that. I appreciate that.

I love you too, Chris. Thank you. You're welcome. That's because people always look at where you are. They look at the top. They're like, oh, wow, look up there. Look up there. They don't look at all the steps that it took to get there. How the bottom, all they can see is,

wow, you're all the way up there. No, look at all of that. That's the journey. It is a journey. Yeah, that's the journey. Yeah, yeah, wow. Was there any time in your life, like as you continued to climb, that you're like, whoa,

like even where you are now, billionaire, like established, new studio, still expanding. You have the biggest studio right now, bigger than, I feel like it's in the United States period. Yours is the largest. The land mass, yeah. Land mass, yeah. So is there any time as you're-

Maybe Pinewood may be bigger, but anyway, go ahead. Is there any time where you hit moments where you're like, ooh, God, can I go higher? Because you have a book, Higher is Waiting, but do you ever even doubt yourself? No, at 53, I've had enough experiences to know that I have to surrender. When I bought my first studio, I thought, OK, this is it. It's great. I'm not building a studio.

It's paid for, I outgrew it. Next studio, same thing. Outgrew it in no time. Then Greenbrier, I thought I'd be there forever. Outgrew that thing, we were on top of each other in that building. But what I learned is that every time I was supposed to move to the next level and I didn't

because I was comfortable, because I didn't want to pay more, I didn't want to grow, I thought I was where I wanted to be, everything in my life got uncomfortable until I moved. So I completely... Everybody all right over there? Everybody all right? So I completely learned the hard way. Like, just case in point, the Croc Street Market right now, which was my first bigger studio on Croc Street. I was hired, I had hired these bootleg carpenters to come in and fix it up and all this other

stuff and I was, I'm like, good, I got this building. I paid for it. This is where I'm gonna make my studio. That thing wasn't even as big as stage one is right now. So, they're trying to force it and ended up on the news. Monica Kaufman, Richard Belcher talking about, Channel 2 news, Tyler Perry is building a whole studio without permits.

I tell you, so I was just like, I was like, Charlie 2 News, Tyler Perry is building a whole studio without permits. I tell you, I was so devastated because I had hired this guy to do a job, but the message came to me very clear, you're too big to do it wrong. Too big to do it wrong, you got to do it right. I was still pushing for trying to make it work. The neighbors started complaining, we didn't have enough parking, there was only parking for maybe 80 cars. And I was mad and I didn't wanna go. And so when my lawyer called me and told me about Greenbribe,

I went over there and I was like, I don't wanna be over here. I went and laid down, couldn't sleep, went over there late at night and I was praying about it. And I looked closely at the gates and there was, because it's all padlocked and chained up and the gates had Bible scriptures on it. The Psalms 91, my favorite scripture was on the gate.

I was like, okay God, I get it. So I bought it, thought I would not grow it, but I did. But right after that, outgrowing it, here comes this offer for Fort McPherson. You know, I told, I called the mayor and said, I'm leaving. I'm gonna move to Douglasville. He's like, no, no, no, I want you to come see Fort McPherson. You know, I told, I called the mayor and said, I'm leaving, I'm gonna move to Douglasville. He's like, no, no, no, I want you to come see Fort McPherson. When I walked into Fort McPherson,

the first thing I thought was, oh, I'm supposed to do this. It wasn't where I had been before with the thought of, oh gosh, let me just get paid for this. I had to learn to be open to where I was going and build for where I was going rather than living and being closed and staying where I was, right? So understanding that through some hard trials,

I learned to just surrender when it shows up. Wow. I want to touch on something that you've helped me in my personal life when it comes to going higher. We've been talking about men's? No, not yet. We're going to get there.

Okay, okay. We're going to get there. Yeah, because we talked about that too. Relationships, yes. Yes, yes. But it was in my living. We were shooting, I want to say, Madea, maybe in Halloween, the second one, one of the movies. And that's when I was still styling you.

We were in the bathroom changing Madea's wardrobe and you were like, where you living? And I said, oh, I'm renting a townhouse. And you're like, okay. And you're like, you don't own it? And I said, no. And he goes, you need to go buy a house. And I was like, well, sir, the way we work, I was like, we work and then we save our money to live when we're not working.

It's hard to save when you're just like living, you know what I'm saying, basically, living paycheck to paycheck. And you were like, okay, well, how much is a house? And I was like, well, the ones I'm looking at, like, would be like 250, 300,000. And you're like, well, how much is down payment? I was like, like, if you put 10% down,

you may do like 15,000000 between 20 and 15,000. You're like, okay, so what are you waiting on? I was like, what are you like, go get your house. And it was in that moment, I was like, good Lord, what a boss, go get your house. So I got that house and I came back to it instead of, by then we were shooting Have and Have Nots because we moved on to the next project. And you were like, Chris, she got a house? He was like, I'll give you four like, Chris, she got a house, he was like,

I'll give you four years, you'll be in the mansion. Within four years, I don't know if you remember saying that, we were on set, you called me and you like, it's time to get out of that little apartment. He called my townhouse an apartment, y'all. A four bedroom, three and a half bath, three. It was beautiful, it was beautiful.

But I knew, again, in my life, what I learned and what I understood was, be open when it was beautiful. But I knew, again, in my life, what I learned and what I understood was be open when it shows up. That's not arrogance, that's not anything. There's so many people who I know I've met in this lifetime being very poor and not doing very well, who on that side of it, they never apologize for it. We as black people constantly apologize

when we have something good. Like you talk about that lady who talked about stop showing off, you should be, you should be. See, that's somebody who don't even understand that it's based on the experiences of what we have done as black people in this country, the things our ancestors did, our success has already been bought and paid for.

If we could get our mentality around what that means, you wouldn't walk around apologizing for it. I know that's right. And you taught me to live unapologetically. Yes, it's okay. Yep. And even when I was living in a scarcity mindset, you were like, Chris, I know you feel like

you just got through the door, or just one foot. You're like, you're in the door. You all right. You're all right, go get what you want. And I was like, well, I know you feel like you just got through the door or just one foot. You're like, you're in the door. You're all right. You're all right. Go get what you want. I was like, well, I don't know if I can. He's like, stop living like that. Because you said that you would go buy what you could afford. Like, I know I can handle this. And then you're in there for two years. You know, like, I should have just got what I wanted because God continued to multiply, multiply. You're like, I could have just got what I wanted. Yes. And many times in my life I've been in a situation,

why did I buy this? Why am I, why didn't I buy this? I didn't, when that's right there. Yes. Yeah. So you helped me to one, dream bigger, to open my lens and be like, okay, I can do this. And every time I go higher, my life just makes room.

It makes room, my ideas get bigger, the money, it comes and it takes, it's never like a, oh God, how am I about to take get bigger. The money, it comes in. It's never like, Oh God, how am I going to take care of this? No, there you go. And then you realize after four years, you go, man, I just breezed through that. That wasn't even a stretch because your mind became open to the possibility of what it could be. Yes. Yeah.

But that also comes with exposure. I'm a young girl from Martin, Tennessee. Population, 10,000 people, like super small. And you have one, I remember the first time you invited me to the island and I was sitting at the table with everybody and I don't know if you could feel the timidness and you were like, if you're at this table, it's because you belong. And I remember one morning just walking around, just touching the leaves. I'd never seen an island, a private island, a private island, I've been on an island,

but not an island like that. And I was like, this man, this is his own island. Just walk, if I can, I don't even need all this. This is possible. Then that's exposure, you know what I'm saying? Just knowing that I know somebody who has done it. This is something I can do as well. And the places you've taken me,

we've traveled the world together, has opened my eyes to so much where a lot of people aren't privy to seeing. Think about a couple things, Brenda, traveling the world. But let me just say this, now I go to travel the world. Oprah did that for me. When I first went to her house, she did that for me. I was like, oh, this is possible. You can actually dream and be, I'll never forget I'm on

video saying this. I'm probably 35 at the 36. My first movie had just come out. And I was just like, Oh, I could have this. It took all of the reins and blinders off. And I was just like, Okay, God, what you got? Yeah, what I'm gonna do the best I can to honor it. I'm gonna be good to people. I'm gonna, everybody that comes in my life, I'm gonna make sure that they are touched and affected in a beautiful way, that their lives are changed,

that they're really see and dream. Everything you show me, God, I'm gonna try to pass it on to somebody else. And everybody who can get it, I'll take it, right? So that's the feeling I want the people around me to have. That's the feeling I want the people around me to have. That's the feeling I want the people at the studio to have because at this point, what else is there to do? Exactly.

Exactly. That's so good. Yeah, that traveling the world. Just like, she don't like roaches. So we were in Bora Bora. Bora Bora. Really nice. So do y'all know those beautiful places over the water?

Yeah, a little bungalow. It was nice. If you walk in a hotel that's very expensive and there's roach spray in the closet, something's up. So I didn't catch that. Yeah. I didn't read the room. As soon as I walked in, I saw that roach spray.

Because the place is beautiful. The glass bottom looking out. I was like, oh, OK. I feel 100. What without Crystal doing in her room with our crystal doing her room screams. I do not do roaches. I was like, they're like the people came in the room that manager and he was like, Oh, I'm talking about. Yeah, it was a big roach. He was like, Oh, this is a water bug. I said, no, that's a cockroach.

Yeah, we we from the South and we get on his head. That's a cockroach. Y'all gotta get that thing. Y'all came in there moving furniture with me. Y'all like, first of all, it's hot in here. Turn the air on. Turn the air on. Yeah.

Or the time I said Beyonce, she was ready to go. Oh my gosh. The first time I took me. I was in Miami, you guys, on a vacation. I like to travel by myself sometimes and then my girls would come meet me after I've had my me time. So it was before my girls landed, and I had unpacked... I was staying in Miami for a while.

I had unpacked my clothes, and I never do that. I never unpack and hang things up. I just live out the suitcase. This particular trip, I had unpacked. I get a call, and he's like, hey, I need you to pack some things for me. I've got to go to Copenhagen. And I was like, okay. And I said, okay, I'll get some things done.

So I had called Armani. I was like, hey Armani, can you face Tommy so I can, you can help me with this? I'm not in town. And then I get another call and he was like, well, I need you to pack your things too because we're going to see Beyonce. Y'all, I ain't never packed. I ain't never got to the airport that fast. I called you back.

I called you back. I called you back because I knew you had friends. I knew you had packed. I called you back. I say, so you think you're going, you're going, I'm at the airport. I'm going to call you back. I'm going through security.

I'm going to call you back. I'm going to call you back. On the way. And that was the most amazing experience. We flew on your jet to Copenhagen. I got to meet Beyonce for the first time. Y'all like, do we need to land in the past? She gonna faint.

What's gonna happen? Oh my goodness. And that was just, that was crazy. Thank you for the many experiences. But that was that when it started. Exposure. Exposure. That's what I completely love and hope that more of us have.

And it doesn't take, you don't have to travel the world. You could just get out of your neighborhood, go to other neighborhoods, see other things. When I was struggling and broken in my 20s, I barely had nickel or anything to eat, but I would go to an open house in the nicest neighborhoods. And I would drive, test drive cars,

just not for the materialness of it, but just to know it's possible. Right? And because in my neighborhood, there was the drug boys or the preachers who were the only ones doing well. So I didn't see anybody else that was in the movie business or anything, I didn't see any of that.

So coming to Atlanta really opened my mind up to the possibility of there are other things you can be other than those two. Absolutely, wow, that's good. Something else that I have learned from you is generosity. I've always just naturally just been a nice person, speak to everybody. But it was, first it was Andy Norman,

who we love, works at the studio. Yes. That's my right hand over there. Oh my goodness, love him. And he called me one day, he always goes to church on Wednesdays. And he said, I don't know why God put you on my spirit, but he told me to tell you,

your living is in your giving. He said, I don't know what this put you on my spirit, but he told me to tell you, your living is in your giving. He said, I don't know what this, why, what it was. And at this time I was, I wasn't even costume designing. I was just a costumer. So that, you know, that's just like, okay, what does that mean? You know? He's like, your living is in your giving. So we take a break.

I get a call from Ozzy, who was the president at the time, and he goes, hey, Todd wanted me to call you to see if you'd be interested in costume designing the next season of shows. And I was like, ooh, that's a big job. I don't know if I'm ready for this, if I'm prepared. And I end up praying about it, and I end up taking the job. And when I walked in for my first day, Andy was like, I didn't know where you were going or what it was about. He said, but you're going higher. And I was like, Andy, this is crazy.

And he's like, don't forget what I said. And he always reminds me, and I never forget that, but just being around you and styling you for the years I styled you and actually getting a close up look at how you run things the way you give silently. People don't even know that half of the things you do, because you can be sitting in your living room watching TV, like, I want to help that lady and figure out, find her, I want to help her rebuild whatever. You know what I'm saying? You always

bless people. And I remember it was during COVID and you called me and you said, hey, I just want to check on you. Are you good? Cause we weren't working. You wanted to make sure I was, I was okay. I said, no, it's how you take good care of me. I'm good. And in turn I turned around and called Herman.

Remember he had told us to throw him out. And it just, that's, I feel like when you're around somebody of your caliber, those are the things you need to take from them. You know, like learning how to, like that was a valuable thing for me. I feel like when you're around somebody of your caliber, those are the things you need to take from them. That was a valuable thing for me. This man, he just gives freely and with a cheerful heart. And that was one of the things I was like when I'm in this position, because I would

already do it when we come back to work, I'd buy people lunch because I knew they hadn't been working for a while, so I would do what I could do. I couldn't buy a car. That's the same thing though. Giving doesn't have a value when it comes from a pure place. It could be $10 billion, it could be two pennies. It doesn't have a value when it comes from purity. Giving is about what it does for the other person.

Exactly, and I learned that from you. That's another thing. Being around you, I've learned so many things. Just even how to carry myself. Because a lot of times you don't know why God's putting you around someone. I had no idea why you chose me or why God put it on your heart to be like, her, I want her to come and help me with this. But in that, it was literally molding me to be able to sit in the space I'm in now and

to be able to carry it. You know what I'm saying? That's why I tell everyone who is around somebody who they are wondering, like I was around people like Oprah and you know, T.D. Jakes and things. I'm like, why these people are so amazing. How am I, what am I, what is this about? But they were there to teach me something. And I watched the grace of how they carried themselves. I watched the compassion and I watched how they treated everybody around them.

All people wanna do is be seen and heard, right? So if you, sometimes that's all they need. And so when I'm helping someone and as you said, most of it's private because the world don't need to know it. But there are moments where people want to know it. And then there are moments where I say, okay, people should know this because there's so much hell in the world right now.

So let's see how much good this can spread. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. But it's really, really important to be able to have what you have and have an open hand and heart to help other people. Yes. I get that from my mother.

I mean, I would wake up when I was a kid and step out of the bed, I would step on somebody on the floor. Like who are these people? She's like, they needed a place to stay, right? So she wouldn't give them no money, but she would, you know, you couldn't get $20 out of my mother,

but she would feed them, she would clothe them. She was just amazing. I love that, I love that. You talk about your mother, I know she's someone who holds a dear, dear place in your heart. And you've talked about the dysfunction of your home growing up.

What was it with that little boy? Because you say in your book, Hire is Waiting, you say that ever since I was a little boy, I've known there was something greater than myself, something bigger, something stronger, something higher. I know for me as a kid, living in Martin, Tennessee, I didn't see anything that God had put in my mind. I didn't see anything that even reflected that.

I'm like, so why do I feel like I can, I only saw it on TV. What was it, for that little boy living in New Orleans, it was like, it's something bigger for me than this. That was the most frustrating part of my life and career is having all of that vision inside of me and then not seeing a path, not seeing anybody else who had done it, not seeing anybody around.

I was just like, how is this even possible for me to obtain this? But for me, my mother took me to church all the time. So I just would hear my uncle preaching about, if you pray, God will answer your prayers. And I just believed from a little boy that God was answering my prayers, especially when I got these, I thought that the television,

floor-mounted television, y'all don't know what that is. But floor-mounted television, I thought that the people inside on Gilligan's Island, the TV show were inside the TV, and I wanted to go behind it and open it up and find them. And my father would have killed me though. So I prayed, I said, God send me some little people to take care of.

And I'm leaving school, I come home and there's a house, a bamboo house sitting on the porch. The lady across the street had left, had moved away. And she asked my mother if I could have her parakeets, Fifi and Pierre, and she asked my mother if I could have her parakeets, Fifi and Pierre, and they spoke. So as a little boy, I'm like, God heard my prayer. He heard it. Yeah. So from then on, from then on, it was like, okay, this prayer thing works. It works. Yeah. It's prayer still works. Can I get my coffee to get up there with you, the boy? Right.

The note is up here while you're out here. Exactly right, right, right, right, right, right, right. Gowns, nice gowns, nice gowns. Aretha, Aretha, Aretha, she is something. Yeah. I like to ask that question because a lot of times when people see us where we are now, it's like, where did that start? So I definitely wanted to touch on that.

I know you can't just say this about God, in fact. see us where we are now, it's like, where did that start? So I definitely wanted to touch on that. I know you can't just say this about God, I know the world is changing and people are getting away from so many things and it makes sense because of what church has become. But my whole hope is that if people have a relationship with God and believing that they never ever equate that to something that man is, because they will always let you down. Preacher man is because they will always let you down preacher pastor

Priests will always let you down. They are not God. They are human. They're allowed to be flawed They're allowed to make mistakes get out my business So so I give them the grace of being human. Yes, but when I need grace I go to God not for them Yes, absolutely. I just literally just yesterday had this conversation with my brother Marquise, and he was like, you know, I just, church hurt. He was like, I just don't feel, he said, I just don't want to go through this again.

And I was like, I literally told him, I said, Marquise, I was like, the pastor is not God. I was like, he's human just like we are. I said, we're going to church to get closer to God. If that person is delivering the message the way you need it, we have to give them grace in their personal life. Like we can't judge that. Or that ain't your business.

If God sends a message, and you know when that message is yours, coming through that person, you know God spoke to you through that person. It's easy to start to see the person as God and miss the spirit that came through. Listen, I've gotten messages from winos on the street that was like, oh, that was God just spoke to me.

So I've learned to completely be, when you listen and you're open and you hear, you know. You know, because in my life, if I pray something and like I have friends who are praying for me a prophet like Andy would do you, God will send somebody to confirm the exact prayer, the exact thought, the exact thing I'm going through, almost in the exact words and I go, okay.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Then he keeps talking to me, he all in your business. All right. I'm gonna be like. I'm gonna be like, what you been listening to? Right, you're right.

So good, so good. So let's talk about something that you and I talk about. Uh oh. My mans. Oh lord, oh lord. My man, my man, my man. Yeah. So for the longest, like you've seen me go through different relationships and recently,

it was the night that we all went to dinner after you moderated Michelle Obama's book tour here in Atlanta. And you said, Crystal, you are vibrating here. Your man is here. And I was like, ooh. You trying to tell me I'm a little vibrational, Tyler? What are you trying to say? And I was like, ooh, I had to think about that.

I was like, wow, am I, you know what I'm saying? You were like, you're here and he's up here. You got to go higher in that area too. And I was like, wow, that's crazy. I was probably had a gummy that night. So I was, I get super spiritual when I'm on gummies, but that sounds good. Okay, go ahead. It was real good.

Just five milligrams of weed. That's all I could do. You know, if I try anything else, I'd be like, no, no, y'all come get me, I'm going to the hospital. Five milligrams. Going to the hospital. By a milligram. Yeah, by a milligram. But understanding, yeah, and having people meet you at your work.

Yeah. Yes, when you said that, we were, one of our many nights at your island, darling, in the King's Landing Room, at the table, you said, it just hits you, you probably was on the government there too, you was like, meet me at my worth. And we were all like, wow.

That's it. That's it. And anybody who can't do that, that doesn't mean they're not worthy of you. That means that they need to either attempt, try, learn, find out enough about you to be able to figure out what that is. And that's not money because you, listen,

a lot of women, especially black women, and I might get in trouble for saying this, but I will. In our society right now, black women are making a lot more money for the most part than black men, right? There are a lot of black men who are successful, but for the most part, black women are making the money. So if you can find love, if that man works at whatever job

and is a good man and is good to you and honors the house and honors his wife and does what he can because his gift may not be your gift. That is okay. That's not somebody who's beneath you. That's somebody who came to love you at your worth, right? Yeah, and as long as he's secure in himself to know that yep She makes most of the money all I can pay is the light bill as long as she's comfortable enough to say I'm gonna cover

The mortgage and all the other stuff you've had a light bill, baby You can take me to dinner and every now and then that is fine. Yeah, that's fine Yeah, but that's so hard for a lot of people to take in because that means, no, no, no, I need somebody to, who is, they need to make five times more and I got to have, well, you keep, go and keep your list, baby. God bless you, hope it happens.

Go and keep your list. But when you talk about just someone to love you and support you, I know people who have, who's men can't touch what they make. But when you see them together, that love, that support, that I got you, babe, it's a beautiful thing. It is, it is. I remember I was having a conversation with you

and I was going, I can admit that I had fallen under that like, okay, I actually may have misunderstood what meet me at my worth meant. I thought meet me at my work was meet me at my net worth. Meet me at my net worth, right, right. No, not your net worth. Right. Meet me, at least meet me at my net worth.

Yeah, that's your net worth. Okay. Yeah, yeah. And I was talking to you, I was like, and Tyler, I was like, this, this, and this, and this, and I've done this, this, and you're like, wait, wait, wait, wait, stop. He was like, don't make it about money. And this is when I was like, oh my gosh, like it was like, like it just went off and I was like, I see what you're saying.

You were like, Chris, like you do the same thing. I would like be doing all these things for someone or people around me. And I'm like, they're not doing, I'm not getting anything in return, you know? And we fall into that sometimes. And you said, but then I thought about it, they can't do for me the way I do for them. It's just like, they can't. You got to, when you explained it like that, if he is giving you all these other things, then that's something you work with. And I did, I've, I literally completely misconstrued what meet me at my worth in that moment, but worth is more than that.

You know, and that sounds like, wow, this is way deeper. You gotta remove the money from the situation because it's just gonna cloud it. And then you have your girlfriend and this friend and they're saying, he's doing this and he ain't got that. You don't understand the love that we have for each other. And that is what is important. And I'm telling you, there are some good men

who can meet you at your net worth. Yeah. Yeah, and if you can find a man who is secure enough within himself to stand in that space. Yeah. Yeah. I'll tell you the story.

Oprah tells a story about her and Stedman. She was, they were in Hawaii and she was walking, this was years ago, she walked in the store, he was behind her, and, no, I'll tell you this story, because I was there for this one. We were coming out of the Color Purple premiere in New York, and Tina Turner, Oprah, me, and Gayle,

were all getting in the car. You just said that so it was Tina Turner and Gayle? Well, listen, that's when I first knew, that's when I first knew something had shifted. Okay, wow. Because Oprah walks out and they scream, Oprah, Oprah, Oprah. Tina walks out and, Tina, Tina. I go out of here, Tyler, Tyler. I go, whoa.

This is very early on. Oh my gosh. They're pushing us into the limo and I turn back and Stedman, the security is pushing him out of the way, not letting him in. I watched him tap the man on the shoulder and say, hey, it was, oh, oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Graham. And he let him in the car. But do you know when I saw that man who's six foot six

in that situation, I went, wow, look at the grace in how he carried it. He didn't get a car with attitude. He wasn't mad, which takes me back to the story in Hawaii. When they were in the store and everybody swarmed around Oprah, he was watching protectively. And after she was leaving the store, the store owner, older person said to her,

listen, I watched that man how he loves you. I watched that man how his aura is all around you, making sure you're okay and safe. So, and, and Stepman does well in life, but I don't know nobody doing well as Oprah. You know what I mean? So it can't be about the money. It can't be about the money.

That was like, that was a good nugget that you gave me recently. And I was like, wow, because you do get caught up in the what your girls are saying and what society is saying. But that's, and if you try to make it about the money, then it's always gonna be about the money. And the money is, you have to understand that when you start to make money and do well,

that becomes a part of the perception of who you are. Right? And that's okay. That was the thing that bothered me about it. It was like, all he sees is my money, all he sees is my money. And I'm a good person. person number to let all they go. I'm like, yeah Well, the money is a part of your person now. So let that be Wow, and that's okay Yeah, it is now when you started making money. We talked about money as a part of the person listen That's a whole nother podcast and the financial literacy. Yes. Yes, but I didn't go ahead. Let's yeah

Even like with like family and friends, what did you go through when you started accept? Because that's the thing I start to deal with now. Just the entitlement or like gimme, gimme, gimme, and the random text messages, and you're like, I'm just waiting on them to ask me for something. Yeah, because usually what happens is

they don't talk to you forever, and then they're like, hey, how you doing? Have you been on my mind? God told me to pray for you on my heart. I'm thinking, okay, 10, nine, eight. Can you send me $30,000? Cause I need, you know, and then I had another family member send,

and I was hurt by it. I said, listen, you sent me a text asking for $30,000. That's offensive. Like call me, see how I'm doing. And then I don't mind giving you the money. Well, this family member got offended. So I've never asked you for nothing else. I was just saying how impersonal the text is.

Yeah, absolutely. Little while later, I get another text. I need $30,000, same person. And then the follow-up text was, make it 40. I kid you not. And I was hurt by the fact that- Make it 40? Yeah, yes, it was just so blatantly like,

I'm just the money, right? And I get to this place, it's this thing called compassionate fatigue, where you just get exhausted from giving. And for me, I have to this place, it's this thing called compassionate fatigue where you just get exhausted from giving. And for me, I have to go away and pray and get myself back together because I get to get out of my face kind of place, you know what I mean? So I have to go back and get right with that.

But having that, having family members, you know- That's crazy. Yeah. I just wonder how you do on your level because nobody's called me for 30, well, the time they did call me for 40. Right, right. So let's go back. Let's go back.

But you know what? I learned to accept them as who they are. And the family doesn't necessarily have to be the people that are your blood. So I started surrounding myself with people who genuinely cared about me. If we were on a boat, and that's something when we're in our groups on the trips, if we're on a boat, if we're on the island,

you know these people care. They can't pay for it, but they are there because they wanna support you and care for you, and that feels more like family to me. So my family gets money, but they have to work or they won't get money because I'm not the bank and I'm not the government. And I think it's important that people work.

So working is so important. Yeah. I agree. Was there ever a moment where you had survivors remorse, where you, the only person in your family that has made it, where you feel like, no, I feel bad that I'm the one that made it and everybody else didn't, so I have to do these things. First year I made money. I went from being dead broke, I was 28 years old, I made $130,000.

I was like, oh my God, $130,000. Got to the end of the year, had nothing to pay my taxes, because I had given it all away. I had so much guilt, that I'd given it to all family, all friends. Next year, I think I made a million and a half. Same thing happened again. Next year, I made seven million.

Same thing happened again. Because I had so much guilt because I had, and I think this is something that we as black people carry because of what we've been through. And when you have, you think, oh my God, I need to bring everybody else up with me. That's a beautiful thought. But in the beginning, that's bullshit.

Take that, that's bullshit. Take that out of your mind, because I'm gonna tell you right now, if you have a boat that can help you get to one from this place to that place so that you can get a bigger boat and you can only take two or three people, don't let everybody on that boat.

And you gotta be also careful because when you put too many people on the boat, there's some trying to put holes in it because they want it to sink because they don't like that you're sailing. Yeah. Yeah. So you have like that you're sailing. Yeah. Yeah. So you have to be careful, right?

Yeah. Or there are some that are putting holes in the boat because they don't feel that they're worthy of it. And I've had that too where I was trying to pull people up to come on, come on, this is far as we can do. We've been together all these years. We can make this happen. It's gonna be wonderful.

It's gonna be great. But the whole thing that I had to realize is that some people cannot survive at certain altitudes. So if you're pulling somebody up a hill who when you get to 10,000 feet, they can't breathe. You're going to kill them. So it's okay to leave them there until they learn the conditioning

of what it takes to be at 10,000 feet. Wow. That's good, T. Wow. Yeah. That's good, T. That's good. It's true. I'm going through a season. I just did an episode called Purging Season in season one. And it was just about God-

Say that again. I'm sorry. Purging Season, season one? Yeah. Yeah, season one, I did an episode called Purging Season. And it was literally like God was just removing people, like friends, family. He was just like, Lord, what is happening right now? And you're starting to see that, like you said,

people can't breathe at the altitude that you're going to. You did a speech about, I think it was a commencement speech on, you talk about rocket boosters. And I was like, when you said that, that's exactly what came to mind when I thought about, Lord, what is this that you're taking me through right now? Because I felt like I was losing people I was really close to.

But everybody can't go. And you ever seen a bunch of kids on Amerigo round and it goes faster and faster and faster and faster and faster? What you find is that the people who are closest to the center can hold the tightest. The ones who are out toward the, who are holding on are getting the most of the G-forces.

It's too, they can't handle it. So those people are falling. So I call it the spin theory. Sometimes in your life, you'll start to spin and you're spinning up to the next level and people start to fall off. And let me tell you something, it hurts, it's lonely, especially when it's somebody that you really, really loved

and had a great time with and wished that they could be there with you. But you have to understand and realize that that toxicity is poison to your wings. It will cause you to crash. So you have to be able to say, I love you, but I'm sorry, this does not work for me anymore. Then you get the shit, oh, you bougie, you changing.

What's, oh, now you got all this and you don't want, none of that matters. Walk through the pain of the loneliest. Come and tell you something, the higher you go, the smaller that circle gets. It is, you're so right. Yeah, yeah. I'm just getting started and I see it.

And it's okay, it's okay because I promise you, if you ask God to give you what you need, they show up. They do, yeah. They show up. And I have what I need. I do, like I really have a good core and everybody that's around me, I know they love me. They support me wholeheartedly.

We all have our own thing going on and it's no jealousy. Right, that's what you want. Because jealousy will show up in ways that you didn't even expect it. People who've been right up under you as long as you didn't exceed what they thought you could be. The minute you start to go higher than they believed you could go, it's ugly.

Yeah, no, absolutely. Yep, that's a real thing. And it is lonely, it is. They say it's lonely at the top of it. No, I'm not lying. But here's what I had to learn how to do. I had to learn to get, all of my friends, nobody can give you all everything you need.

So all of my friends were, brought something, it's like you have a potluck, what you could bring, everybody brings something to eat. And some people may be able to bring fruit, some can bring vegetables, some can bring vegetables, some can bring chicken, something. So I had all of my friends bring me something different. So that I have all that I need.

Because you can't get it from one person. You know? Yeah. That's so good. I love that. DeNora had actually spoken on something recently that piggybacks off of what you said. She goes, a lot of times when God brings people

in your life, you're like, why am I not getting what I'm putting into this? Like I'm pouring, I'm pouring, I'm pouring into this person, but I'm not getting it back. And she said that sometimes that person isn't putting your life to pour back into you. You're on assignment to them. And it's somebody else that's gonna bring you

what you need. That's, that's you're 100% right. That's exactly right. And, and you have to understand that when it's your time to pour, do that. Yes. And, and hopefully that seed that you're watering will start to grow in that person. Cause I've seen this like in you, like seeing you come up to this place of like, look, I poured into her, now look.

And I've got thousands of those examples in this studio. It's like, I poured in, look at him now. And it warms me so much because when you're pouring, pour with pure intention. And then you don't worry about being hurt if it doesn't work out. Just be pure in your intention.

Don't let people change your intention. Even if they give you their ass to kiss after you were trying to help them. Don't stop who you are going to help the next person. You know? So that is so important. Just so important. That's really good.

That's really good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, she's been dropping some nuggets. I'm like, girl, God is really talking to you and me. I love it. So I want to go back to some of your journey.

You started off in the chilling circuit with Madea Plays. You worked your way up to owning your own studio. At the time that you were doing the smaller plays, what was it from... Actually, I want to go back to when you decided..., I, well what was that in between phase of like right before things went crazy? Like when you were doing the smaller plays, what was that like? There was no in between phase.

I was 28 years old, I was 27, broke homeless, 28. I had been trying to do the show for seven years and in 1998 the show took off. So it was famine, famine, famine, struggle, struggle, desert, desert, desert. And then all of a sudden it was abundance. It was the abundant rain pouring. So I went from 90, when I started in 98,

this is why I feel like I've missed 12 years of my life though, I was working so hard. 98, at 28, I kinda came to myself at 40. Like I woke up going, whoa, you did it. But you missed everything. Cause there's so many of those moments I don't remember. I was so laser focused on making the success work.

And also I was afraid of going back. That's what we talked about earlier. I didn't want to be broke again. I didn't want to, you know, I need to have my medicine for my mother. That's how it all started. I just need to, if I Lord just, my prayer was Lord, just let me make enough money to take care of her.

And I had millions and it still wasn't enough in my mind. So I was still going really, really, really hard until she died. When she died, it had reset me. Like everything I was pushing for was gone. Yeah. Yeah. But those times were so,

such a blur because I just worked all the way through. Yeah. Do you have any regrets? Sometimes I do. such a blur because I just worked all the way through. Do you have any regrets? Sometimes I do, because I look, I feel like I'm 12 years younger because I went into this silo of working and I came out 12 years later of like, okay, oh wait, this is what the world is.

This is what, wait, people were out, they were enjoying themselves at these parties and Oscars and award shows. I wouldn't, you know how I would walk in. It was- I was like, I'm not enjoying, nope, this is work. Okay, yeah, we're good. Back to work.

So I feel like I've missed 12 years of my life. Even though now I look back at some wonderful things happened, I'm telling you I miss them all. Like I'll see photos or somebody remind me, you remember when I go, wow, you're right. Yeah. Yeah. That's amazing.

But instead of being 53, I'm 41. There you go. Hey, we the same age. There you go. There you go. I love it. What does a billionaire like you, who has a busy schedule, what do you do for yourself?

Like, you know, a lot of people say, like, this is my me time, this is what I do. What do you do for fun? What do you do to like take care of your body? I know you work out, I know you like to travel, but like, what are things that you do? Because a lot of people like, you're working all the time. When do you have time for just you?

You know what? People think that I'm a lot busier than I am, but because we work so fast and because I build in breaks, I don't try to kill myself. Like I would have back then, but now, no, I build in, I'm gonna work three months really, really hard, nonstop. I'm gonna exhaust myself and then I'm gonna take two months off.

I'm gonna go to my place in Wyoming or Colorado. I'm gonna walk through the woods and be in nature. I'm gonna talk to God. I'm gonna go down to the island. I'm gonna cry. I'm gonna go to my place in Wyoming or Colorado. I'm gonna walk through the woods and be in nature. I'm gonna talk to God. I'm gonna go down to the island. I'm gonna cry. I'm gonna pray. I'm gonna lick my wounds to see who stayed, who didn't, where am I hurt?

Am I okay? Am I feeling loved? Am I feeling supported? I check in with myself. I talk to God about it. It's so important. It's so important. But the biggest thing that I do,

cause I can do it every day that I'm working, is just build airplanes, build model airplanes. Yeah, me and my son will sit there and just, he's loving it. We're, you know, it's just the simplest thing, but to build something that we'll be able to fly, I feel like I'm teaching my son how to literally fly. So those moments are really beautiful.

And this kid, you know he's amazing. He is just- Amazing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Brilliant, oh my gosh. I can't wait to see where he goes and what he decides to do with his life. It's gonna be amazing.

Yeah, and whatever it is, I just want him to be the best at is gonna be amazing. Yeah, and you know, whatever it is, I just want him to be the best at it and be happy. I love that. Yeah, just be happy, son. Yeah, because right now it's a race car driver, astronaut, and a track and field runner, and a comedian. So we had a business meeting in my office a few weeks ago, and I was asking him, you know,

he was in the room when I was having all these meetings. And he comes, okay, Papa's my turn to meet. Okay, great, have a seat. What do you wanna talk about? I wanna talk about my life and my career and what I'm gonna do. It's like, okay, eight years old. Okay, talk about it.

You better, man, I love it. Yeah, so I recorded it and I can't wait to show him when he's older. Like, this is what you wanted to talk about that day. That is amazing, that is amazing. When you are dealing with things, mental health is really big. Like a black community is like really honing in on it and understanding it more. We're more open to therapy.

Who does someone like Tyler Perry talk to? Do you have someone that you can like say, hey, this is what I'm going through? Jesus. Jesus? Yeah, no. Oprah, T.D. Jakes, you know, I have, I have, Michelle Obama, I have really good people who have been through some things.

I used to talk to Cicely Tyson, you know, about things, just that level of history and lessons that she's learned, and Sidney Poitier. I went to the masters. I was flying to Africa, and I invited both of them to fly with me. So I literally sat at their feet, listening to their stories.

You know, Clarence Avon died a couple of days ago and he just was, he was the black offer. He was, absolutely. And anytime you needed anything or something put together, this or presidents or that he was the man. So, you know, I had a chance to spend time with him. That's just Quincy Jones, these guys, Harry Belafonte on the phone with him.

That's what I mean. Those are the people, but all our legends are getting out of here. They are, yeah. So I'm hoping that more of us will be open to sharing. When I talk to Jay, Jay-Z, he is one of those people who's like, listen, I got the information, come get it.

You know, so. Yeah. That's awesome. But as far as mental health goes, I tell you the main problem that's, you look at the tobacco crisis when everybody was talking about how cigarettes were in the beginning, they were safe,

but people made billions of dollars on it. Then you look at all the other opioid crisis, crack cocaine, right? There's another crisis that is happening that is affecting people's mental health in ways that nobody's talking about. And I'm hoping one day that it comes crashing down like the tobacco industry,

like the opioid addiction industry, Purdue Pharma, and that is social media. I knew you were gonna say that. Oh my gosh, you are right. If you don't believe me, try to turn it off and put it down. I pick up my phone randomly, like I'll be doing something,

then before I know it, I'm just scrolling on Instagram. It's like a drug. Yes, and you're being fed whatever algorithm you chose because it's attached to where you go, where they are tracking everything you're doing. And whatever mood you're in, that's what it's gonna enhance.

So if you're a person who's already struggling and sad and depressed and dealing with some things, it's gonna be really, really tough to come up higher when you're constantly being fed things that make you sad and depressed. I'm not talking about clinical depression. I'm talking about people who are sad and depressed. Yeah.

No, I used to, I went through a phase where I had body dysmorphia because I would look on Instagram and I would see all these perfect bodies, whether it was plastic surgery bodies or just everything is perfect. Everybody's just showing the highlight reel. Yeah, that's all you're seeing. You're never seeing the down times. And I try to be more transparent with that because people just think our life is so perfect.

And I'm like, no, it's not. And listen, I know a lot of those folks and I'd be like, this your life for real? Because that ain't what you really go through. So it's just like, stop with the madness. Stop with the madness of trying to give this perfect image that everything's perfect. Cause there are people who are really struggling,

who are really looking to these images and thinking, this is how my life should be. Now, if it's aspirational, great. But if it's something that you know damn well, you got 38 filters on, 2000 retouches forty eight something else to make sure it looks great. Come on That's how was that girl? Digital Botox nip-tuck yeah I worry about it for my son who's not on it who doesn't see it doesn't you know?

I he reads books. So I don't want him to be so unaware of it, but I want him to know who he is before the world starts to try to tell him who he is. That's so good. I love that. I love that. So when we talk about God and aligning your vision with God, how do you create the space with God

to really like talk to you and say, hey, I know you said sometimes things get shaken up when you start try to go against what God is saying Maybe because you see something totally different because your vision is not aligned. Yeah, and I've learned to surrender to God's vision I don't try to align have him aligned to my vision. I let the opposite happen. I'm like, okay, where are we going? Yeah, what are we doing? And I've learned so much God to trust you that this is the way I'm going to go. Cause I don't want the resistance and the fighting or the other stuff, it's just a surrender to it.

But again, I keep going back to social media because it is so hard to hear from God in noise. And if you are the type of person that is seeking advice from every friend you have, online, every Instagram, every TikTok, if you're seeking advice, how can you know the still small voice that I believe is God? That's why I have to remove myself and not be on anything digital and just listen to see what I hear. Walking in nature is the best way. I was out in Colorado and the wind just whispered, I heard it, I thought it was traffic coming because we were up on this mountain.

I thought it was traffic and I asked the guy, is that the traffic? He said, no, that's the wind, it's coming. And I heard it come down over the mountain, down through the valley and come up over it. And for me, that's like how I think God will speak. Like there'll be over there just this little bit of something that you missed.

And then there's another something, okay, you missed the acorn, so now the branch has to fall. Okay, you missed the branch, now the tree's gotta fall on you. Okay, you still missed that, the whole forest is burning. So I've learned to just, when I see the acorn, I'm gonna be like, oh, no, no, no, no. Let me get that.

Cause I don't want the tree or the forest. Just give me the acorn. Oh, that's good. Cause yeah, the whole forest would be burning around me. Cause I'm like, no, I see it this way. Like I need to get better at surrendering. I always ask for God to order myself, but I still am very much like, okay,

this is the way I see it, I'm just gonna go this way until God is like, girl, get back here. Yeah, God in the Bible says, my thoughts of you are pure and of a good report and that you be in health and prosper as your soul prospers, right? So all of that's good, right? So if your vision isn't aligned with what's good,

then I don't know how that can be God. Right, that's so good. And what's good for you may not be the thing that you're supposed to do at the time. And that's normally what I be doing. Yeah, okay. I always do things that I don't need to be doing. And God's like, girl, we've been through this before,

why are you still doing the same thing? But let me tell you something, I really didn't understand the love of God until I had a child. Wow. And if God loves us more than I love my child, then I can't even wrap my brain around that because this, and he does,

because when I see him making a mistake, or when I see him going the wrong, doing when I see him going wrong, doing something wrong, I'm like, okay, how do I correct him? How do I get him on the straight and narrow? And I'm gonna choose the level of correction based on how hard he's going at it. Yep. Yeah, yeah.

That's good. I love that, I love that. So we talk about you having vision as a little boy. So as an adult, what do you, once you have that vision, how do you decide, okay God, I'm gonna partner with you to bring this to life? Is it through prayer, through meditation, or just always keeping him involved? It's his vision. So you riding along. He gave it to you.

Yeah, you ain't in partnership. It's his vision for your life. So it's surrendering to where is this taking me? That's the thing, like where is this taking me? And that's what I was saying, the most frustrating part of my early life was having all these visions and not seeing the path. So I could have did a million plays and never saw anybody ever saw, never.

God had to line all of that up for it to start to work. And I had to be willing to get in the middle of it and go hard. That's why I missed those 12 years, because I just, I was in the will. In the will, in the flow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Still, still, yeah.

But I'm enjoying my life a lot more now. I'm enjoying the, I'm taking the moments now. I was just at an age where, you know, that's running hard. I love you in this phase of your life. You're happy and enjoying it. Yeah, wearing nice clothes, going to concerts, smiling and stuff.

We got some bling bling on. Got a little reach. Yeah, we didn't, we didn't. Things I never bought before. Like, yep, no. But you can, you know. Yep, yep. Had my zoot suits, my Steve Harvey suits

back in the day I was clean. Had my rabbit jacket. Mm. Couldn't tell you. They told me it was a mink, but it was a rabbit when I bought it at Greenbriar. Mm. Not bought it at Greenbriar.

I sure did. I wanted that store still there. I need to go buy that store just to see. It probably is. That is hilarious. Tyler, thank you so much. I appreciate it. No, I appreciate you. I am beyond proud of you, my love. thank you so much. I appreciate you. No, I appreciate you.

I am beyond proud of you, my love. Thank you so much. So proud of you. Thank you. Looking at you come through all of this and I was right there with you to see it. The whole time, yes. Thank you.

To see it, look at you. It's crazy. When you wake up in here, do you like, this is my life? When I open those doors and walk in here, I'm like, wow. This is my life. This is my life, yeah. It feels so good. Yeah, God bless you. I'm so proud of. This is my life. This is my life, yeah. Yeah. It feels so good.

Yeah, God bless you. I'm so proud of you, baby. Thank you. So proud of you. Thank you, I appreciate you coming today. At the close of the show, we do what is called positive outcomes, where our viewers actually write into us and we're gonna give them some advice.

So our listener letter today says, Hi Crystal, thank you for taking the time to help me. Lately I've been feeling like I'm stuck. It's like I'm being pushed to bigger and greater things, but I feel like I'm getting in my own way. My fear and insecurity keeps holding me back. And I feel myself battle with the fear of others saying, who does she think she is, by fully stepping into whatever it greater is.

The best way I can describe it is that feeling when I'm on a boat and God is calling me to the water, but my fear of drowning is greater than my faith that God will help me float. So I'm just standing at the edge of the boat, not jumping. How can I get myself to jump? Go back and read again.

Read again. Okay, all right. Hi, Crystal. Thank you for taking the time to help me. Lately, I've been feeling like I am stuck. It's like I'm being- Problem number one. Ooh.

I have been feeling like I am stuck. She's speaking that I have been feeling like I am stuck. So you speak things into existence, the power of life and death's in the tongue. I have been feeling like I am stuck. Rather than I am not stuck. God is going to make a way. I am not stuck. Go on. What's there something else she said? She says, it's like I'm being pushed to bigger and greater things, but I feel like I'm getting

in my own way. It's like I'm being pushed. No, I am being pushed to bigger and greater things, I am being pushed to bigger and greater things, but I am getting in my way. And understanding your own words. Baby, you're giving the answers to yourself. I am getting in my own way. Well, why? What is your motivation? Why are you getting in your own way?

What did mama say? What did daddy say? What did they say at school? What did the little girl in you deal with that makes you get into the way of the successful woman that's trying to figure it all out? So you've got to go back and undo some of those voices. And every time you hear something negative,

when I was coming through all this stuff, every time I would hear something negative, be like, nope, I'm not letting it in because I believe I can do this. God said I can do this. This is going to be okay. It's all going to work out. Every time, don't let negative voices in your head

become your reality Yeah, because they will mm-hmm they will that is so true She is and then she said my fear and insecurity he was holding me back I feel myself battle with the fear of other people saying who does she think she is by fully stepping into that my fear and It is holding my fear is holding me back.. Here's something you have to understand about fear. Fear and excitement can mimic the same emotions in you. Wow. So you can be excited, but you think you're afraid.

Yes. So you have to be clear about what you're identifying. Right? That's good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's good, wow. You helping me. My goodness, and it says,

the best way I can describe it is that I feel like I'm on a boat and God has called me to the water, but my fear, here goes fear again, of drowning is greater than my faith that God will help me float. Yeah, where did it come from? Let me tell you something, fear is good.

A healthy dose of fear is good to have because it keeps you grounded, it keeps you humble, and it keeps you praying. I never would have gotten to this place if I hadn't been afraid. Every major decision was like, oh, what if this doesn't work out? Like, nope, get that out of your head

because you cannot be afraid. And as I, the more, and I say this to her, the more successes she has, even if she looks back over her life, nine times I tell you, when I ask people this, it blows their mind. I look back at your entire life and tell me how many times God has let you down.

Our entire life. Yeah. And if you really think about that, your future days, you go, okay, even when I thought he let me down, even when I thought I had failed. Even when I thought he let me down, even when I thought I had failed, even when I thought I had messed up, that was good for me so that I could be in this position.

Yeah. I learned so much in the things that God didn't let me do. And when a door is closed, that is not a no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's another way. That's another path. It's like being in a maze. When you hit that brick wall, you don't stop.

No. Okay, maybe I gotta double back. I gotta go this way, I gotta go this way. But you'll get there. Yes. Wow, that's so good. And her last question is, how do I get myself to jump? How do I get myself to jump?

Yeah, by undoing all of those voices that cause you to have those fears. Yes, that's good. Wow. Well, y'all heard it from the man himself. I ain't got nothing else to add to that. That was good. You broke that all the way down.

Wow, that blessed me, my goodness. I only wanna look at Dinora, because I know she's probably crying. I'm scared to look at her. Like. Mm-hmm. So the next thing we do is what I'm going through. I like that outfit. Who bought you that outfit? You did.

Oh wait, go ahead. What are you saying now? What are you saying? Darling, this came from the Dolce & Gabbana store in Portofino, darling. Was it Portofino or was it Capri, darling? It was somewhere we were, darling. It was so long ago to remember. I had a rough night at sea and I was...I couldn't get out to shop and my dear friend Tyler Perry was like, I got you. Yeah, send us to a make sure you feel better. I did?

Immediately I was like, oh. I think I can get up now. Yeah. I did. A black car to make a girl get out of bed. She like flew and everything. That's so good. That's so good. So we also do what is called what I'm going through and what I'm growing through.

And in this season of my life, even based on things we've talked about, I am going through, especially right now we're on a strike, just stretching my faith, learning new things that I wanna do and not putting all my eggs in one basket and just having faith that God is gonna move. And- Is that going through or growing through? This is what I'm going through. Yeah, okay.

Yeah, right now, but then I'm growing. Yeah, then I'm growing through. Right now I'm really growing through and I feel like this is something I'm always going through, not like having control of everything and allowing things to just be, so that'd be what I'm just letting go. Yeah, what about you?

Are you going through? What I go through is just battling compassion fatigue as we talked about before, and understanding that everybody's not gonna get it, and being okay with that. I still have to remind myself of that. and understanding that everybody's not gonna get it and being okay with that. I still have to remind myself of that. That's what I'm growing through, I would say.

Going through, I'm actually pretty good. You are, baby, you good. I'm really, really good right now. I've lived these 53 years and learned a lot of things and all I wanna do at this point is just take this wisdom, these things that I've learned and share them with anybody who wants to receive them, take them.

But I also don't wanna, oh my God, the older you get, I see some old people who just, they are just impatient. The older you get is like, listen, I have one friend I've been trying to help for years. I was like, we've been over this. I've told you these things 10 different times because I never say you should do this. When I'm giving advice, most times I let people talk

so they can hear themselves work out the issues. But other times I'll say, well, if I were in your shoes, if I were, here is my thinking on that. But after sharing and sharing and sharing and sharing, and you still don't start making progress in that direction, like you're wasting my time because there's somebody else who could be using this. And he'll listen and figure it out.

Yeah, take those nuggets you're given and apply it. That's so true. And anybody who can get to me, what I mean by that, it's like anybody who can get in my presence. Like I'm, I say this in the best way. No, I know exactly what you mean. Yeah, I'm Tyler Perry, you know, and I'm a loner by nature.

I like to be alone. And so when people make their way into my life, I go, Oh, you are clearly somebody God has sent for me to pay attention to. Cause you broke through all of that stuff and you're this close. So like, okay, what am I supposed to teach you, God? You can't be selfish, can't be about you.

No matter how tired, exhausted, here's a moment. And because that moment may be something that saves or changes that person's life. Yeah. I'm a witness. I'm a testimony. I'm a testimony. I'm a testimony. A living proof example.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah. And the last thing we do is keep it blank, sweetie. Cause the show is called Keep It Positive, sweetie. But we fill in the blank. And I would say keep it open-minded, sweetie. Because opening your mind to new things

can like get you further. I think we would say the same thing. I say keep it growing. There we go. Keep it growing. Just keep it growing. Yes. Here we go again. Here we grow again. Here we go again. This has been great.

I love it. Thank you so much. Guys, thank you so much for tuning in to this episode. If you want to be featured on our Positive Outcomes Listener Letter, please write in to keepitpositive.sweetie.gmail.com. You can follow me on all platforms at LUVCrystalRenee. And then you can also follow Kips on all platforms at keepitpositsweetie. And you guys can follow Tyler at Tyler Perry

cause he's Tyler Perry. So anytime somebody is being some negative and you don't want them to know what you're saying or they've been all that way, you just say Kips. Kips, that's it. Kips, Kips baby. Kips, T-shirts. Oh, it's coming, coming. Merch. Merch. Merch. The Merch is coming. Yes. Thank you T. My pleasure. I love you man. I love you too.