Keep it Positive, Sweetie - More Than Couple Goals

Episode Date: June 21, 2026

In this episode, Toya Johnson and Red Rush open up about marriage, blended family, entrepreneurship, fatherhood, and what it really takes to build love intentionally in public. From balancing business and family to navigating visibility through reality TV and their content, they’re redefining modern Black love and leadership. This conversation is honest, warm, and deeply grounded in partnership. This episode is about love, family, and building a life rooted in intention.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed Human. It's that time to put on your jersey and wave your flag, whoever you root for. Why do I watch the walk up? That's like asking me, why do I breed? And it's beautiful. The guys are young and cute and fit.

It's not just a game. It's your culture. I like watching it with my dad. It's a connecting force. From Futuro Studios, I'm Fernanda Chavari, and this is American football, a show about soccer culture in the U.S. and its underdog roots. Listen to American football on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Joy is essential and it's also elusive, but now there's a new and exciting way to start your journey toward a more joyful existence.

Joy 101. It's a new podcast hosted by me, Hoda Kotby. If you're craving inspiration to maximize your joy, tune into these candid, uplifting, and moving on-air chats. Open your free IHeart Radio app. Search Joy 101 and listen now. Joy 101 with Hoda Kotphee is presented by CVS. Can superstars even exist the way they used to? 2016 was sort of that last era of monoculture,

where we still consumed things in community. Everybody wanted to be Beyonce at that point. I don't think we'll ever see another beyond. What does it mean to be black and eat in America? You will never make me feel bad for being a black girl, for being a black American girl, ever. From music to food to the conversations shaping black culture right now, therapy for black girls is bringing it all to the mic.

Listen to therapy for black girls on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. It just came out. Jeremy, what did you just do? You just sit yourself up for failure. I've never heard you tell this story. I've never told this story. This must have been tucked down.

deep in the Jeremy Lynn file. My name is MC Jen. I'm excited to tell you about laugh but not least. I'll be chatting with guests from all walks of life about the power of humor when it comes to facing difficult times. These will be conversations that remind us all, life is hard, laugh harder.

Listen to laugh but not least with MC Jen on the Iheart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. Calling all my sweeties to the forefront, I'm your host Chris Renee Hazel. And this is the Keep It Posit Sweetie Show. Welcome to Keep It Positive, sweetie, the place where we heal, grow, and learn together. Toya and Red Rushing have built something people don't just admire.

They connect to it. Whether through marriage, business, reality, television, or social media, they've shown what it looks like to love each other publicly, intentionally, and without apology. This conversation is about modern black love, fatherhood, visibility, and building a light together while the world is watching. Kids Stanley, please give a very warm welcome. Welcome to the Russians. The Russians have built lives people have watched evolve publicly for years. Through business, family, reality television, entrepreneurship, and now opening even more

of their everyday lives through their content. But beyond all of that, what really stands out is the way Toya and Reds show up for each other. As husband and wife, parents, business partners, and leaders, they've created a relationship rooted in friendship, honesty, and growth. This conversation is about marriage. fatherhood, protecting your peace, and what it really takes to build together while the world is watching. Kids family, please give a very warm welcome to my dear friends, the Russians.

Hey y'all. Hey, boo. We finally got y'all on here. What's up, sis? What's up? Finally made it. Finally made it. How are you doing?

We're doing great. Y'all look good. Everybody's talking about how good. Y'all look as a unit. Thank you. She dressed me. She laid it out. You just put all with a, uh.

Yeah, she laid it up. You know, you'd be happy to help them in. Listen, help, listen, you did a great job. You got them together since I appreciate it. So we're going to play a quick game to get started, and the game is called Whose Idea Was It? Okay. So I'm going to ask questions,

and you just point to who would definitely be the person that this would apply to. Okay. The first one is, let's film content for this. Who apologizes first? That's good. Okay. I got to get better.

That's good. Who starts an argument and then acts confused? Who's more likely to say we good when they're definitely not good? Who's stricter with the kids? This one let the kids just do on. Most dads do. They'd be like, don't tell you, mama. Yeah, some red.

Who spends more money? Who's more likely to check on everybody else before checking on themselves? Well, I guess. That's kind of both of us in a way. Yeah. Who's more likely to randomly start a deep conversation late at night? Mm. More like, hey.

That is me for sure. Red me like I gotta get up at five o'clock. Yeah. Thank y'all so much. That was good. I actually love seeing who each other things is the person that does certain things. That was great. You guys have done such a good job for years, keeping your lives private.

And now all of a sudden you guys are putting your life out there. We've seen your life, Toya, play out for years on TV. Red, I've known you for years. And you've always worked behind the scenes. You've worked for, when I knew you worked with NBA players, making sure their businesses and day-to-day were running right. And you were always the guy behind. The toy, you've always been in front.

So what made you guys decide now is the time we want to put our life out there more? I guess, like, it came about what I should. just doing videos and just trying different things or whatever, I've been red coming out of his shadow more. So him just being a team player, really. Like, you know, I'm like, okay, baby, let's do this. And then some stuff he'd be like, okay, we could do that. He started getting more and more comfortable.

They're so good. Thank you. I mean cracking up because I'm like, this is so real. He just started getting more comfortable. But when I saw he was on board or whatever, I'm like, okay, I don't want to force him or push him to do anything. Yeah, for sure. You know, so when he came on board,

It's like, let's do it. I love that. So I remember when y'all first met, he was keeping it a big secret. Oh, yes. We bore. Listen, I was like, who is it? I hate days. I'm like, what?

Listen, it was one of them, you know how you go on a date with somebody, you post the food and not the man, and you post a place and not the man? That was me and him. We would go all kind of days, go all kind of places and never post each other. And then it's like, I pop up pregnant. Everybody's like, what? But, you know, we were feeling, you know, getting to know each other for real and enjoying each other in private. Yeah, let's talk about the importance of that because I think a lot of people now, especially in the social media world,

were so quick to push our relationships out there before we actually cultivate and build that friendship. What was the importance of keeping it sacred? For me, you know, I had just gone through a divorce and I spent a lot of time trying to like become whole, you know, like myself or whatever. And when I met Red, we were really good friends. Like, we talked a lot. It was something different. We was just getting to know each other and then join each other's company.

Right. And I just felt like that ain't something I want to share with the world. Like, I want to enjoy this moment, you know, with us getting to know each other. And it was so much better because we developed a friendship. You know, he was there for me during a very rough patch in my life.

And we, our relationship got stronger in that period. And when we finally did, you know, go public or whatever. We were at a place where we was already, like, strong, like, you know, so it really didn't matter. Yeah, I love that. What was it like for you coming into this relationship and you were a private person as well?

Like, a lot of people didn't know what you did. And I guess that was because of the people you worked with, you knew how to, like, keep the main thing, the main thing. What was it like coming into this relationship and really feeling to you? But then she's like, I don't want people to know we're talking. Like, was there a moment where you were like, what you mean? You're already tell the world. Well, now, you know, you know me, and you knew me before all this.

It was kind of different. Like, I was telling her, like, chill, shoddy. You know what I'm saying? Oh, my goodness. Like, you know, I was like, yo, calm down. I know you. I know you. I know what you lie.

That part. Chill, shoddy, it's crazy. Nah, just like she said, we became real close, and it was just like. Let me just get this glitter off you because it's just. That's a good woman. It was just, I wasn't in a rush. Yeah. You know, I wasn't in a rush at all.

Like, I didn't mind just staying back because I didn't really want to be out there. I didn't want to be. I was enjoying her. And then when we did come out and, you know, the TV and different things like that, I knew what I was signing up for, you know, so I had to adjust and do that. But I really didn't care. Anything I cared about is protecting her, protecting her image and different things like that. Because I, you know me, I don't care.

I don't care about none of them. I think that's what kind of really drew me to him because he was just so different and so like nonchalant and cool. You know, some men just be. Thirsty. Yeah, it's like, relax. Like, Ray was like, damn. It was one of the, you know how women love a challenge.

And it's like you, you know a person like you and they feel in you, but it's like they're just so cool. Uh-huh. You're a little too cool. Yeah, I'm like, well, you're a little too cool. Slip me a little bit. But then it just started. I didn't even realize, like, it didn't really dawn on me until some people said something

about it. Like, her posting, you might see my arm or you might see this. But I ain't even paid attention. You know what I'm saying? Like, it didn't even really, it really didn't matter to me. And I wasn't in a rush to be like, yo, this is who I'm with or anything. like that like my people knew because she would come around she would doing different things like that but i ain't i ain't really care but when we did i mean it was cool i knew what i was signing up for

and like what you're saying about the content stuff and different things we're doing with that i think it's another stage for us as far as working together and finding something that's fun yeah like it's fun i love you know what i'm saying it's actually actually fun. Like we be doing stuff. Like y'all see it and y'all laugh, but like we probably shot it and was dying laughing. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like we in there like laugh. We're looking back at it. Just like crying laughing. Like this is this is it. So I think the whole new content thing, we just started a YouTube series with couples times where we go out with couples, do an activity or something. Y'all found me a man so I can come out with you. You know what I'm saying. Yeah. So I think it's just new things and just, you know.

Okay. And most importantly, it's celebrating love because you hear so many negative things about love and people finding a person and not understanding that. Like, stop looking at other people in their situation. Yeah. Embrace what you have and embrace your person. And date. It's okay to like date and have fun.

So we bring other couples alone and we do fun date activities with other couples. And it just be. just a breath of fresh air, like to hear them talk about each other in a, in a, they all be like, I didn't know you felt that way. Like, it just be the sweetest thing. So that's something we really enjoyed. And I'm sure that's really good for them as well. I love that.

Okay, we got a new YouTube show that I can see turning into a show. A couple sounds. Yes, I love that. That's amazing. Red, you talk about I knew what I was getting into. A lot of people, even for me, like dating, men know what they're getting into, but when they get into it, then they're like, oh, God, like, I didn't know it was all this. Was there ever a moment that you had to really adjust to Toya's life?

Because Toya, this has been your life since you was a kid, basically. You know, you have been exposed to so much in the entertainment industry at a very young age. Was there a moment where now you're like in her world where you were like, okay, I knew what I was signed up for, but this is a lot. Nah. Really? You was like, I'm ready. Because I understood the business from working with top athletes and stuff like that.

So I know the business. I know it come with it. So I've seen it. So when I say I'm signing up for it, I know what I'm signing up for. Like I knew exact. When I came into, when she came into my life and we started dating, it was nothing I've seen that I haven't seen before. Yeah. You know, I just wasn't dealing with it.

I wasn't in a relationship like that. But, you know, I've seen it. Yeah. I've experienced it firsthand where it's like, you knew what this was. Exactly. I've been living his life. Yeah. If we ever had that, it was like you're not understanding my life or you, because

Ray always was the type of person you know that because you know him, he always played the back and he's okay with playing a back to the date. Like he'll push you to shine and he's okay with just being there. Like he never was, I want to be seen. I want to like, that's why I like, no. He doesn't know. He don't care. Come to death.

You got to pull him. Like, come on, Ray. let's do this. But he just so chill. I love that. What is one thing that you think is misunderstood about relationships going more public? I think the comparing thing. I think people like love to compare their situations to other people and wanting people to like be somebody that they're not instead of just this is the person you're with.

Like you either going to make this work and or are you going to move on. You can't change them to be who you want them to be because they are who they are. Right. So I think that's one thing that messes up a lot of relationships or whatever. And like the forcing to go public so fast, it just, it just gives me, I just want to show I got a man. Like, you know, without even knowing a person, it would be a couple of weeks later, monthly. Like, why did I think? Right, right.

I think it's the internet. I think people don't realize the intimate. internet is so judgmental. And we don't, we don't, we don't realize, I mean, people don't realize that and they search for validation and acceptance. So even if you having issues in your relationship, you're so scared of what the internet goes to say. So once people put the internet in their business, they worry about this and worry about

that because everybody had problems. Everybody has problems. Like if you sit down and talk to 10 couples out of, eight or nine of those couples y'all dealing with or have dealt with the same thing. But we are so caught up into, oh, the internet go look like this. I got to look like that and I got to look like that. But it's just, you know, this is what it is. Yeah.

No, their internet is a monster. It is. I feel like when we were growing up, it was if we didn't have all that, you know. So it was writing letters and like all you really talked to is your friends. Your friends knew your family knew, but the world didn't know. I feel like now we live in an age where there's the possibility that the entire world could know your business based on what you put out there. What are things that you do to protect your peace and the parts of your life that you do want to keep private? I feel like everything is not for everybody to know.

Yeah, that's a word. You know, you get to these, people get to this place where they feel like, okay, I'm going through this. I want to share this. And it be something that backfires, like, eventually. in the backfire on them. For sure. I'm like, for just sharing it. Everything is not for everybody to know.

When we're going through stuff like, we like every other couple. Our relationship is not perfect. We go through things just like everybody else. But it's like being able to communicate with your person, talk about it. You know what I'm saying? Instead of like going to tell all of your friends putting your business out on the Internet, like what is that going to do for? Yes.

I don't understand that whole era of that. But like we believe in like if we have issues or problems like talking to each other, It's important to have a village, that's true, but I, you know, his mom, like, you know, people that are, not people that's going to drag us. Right. You know, like, in the Internet, like, girl and I've even learned, like, even with family, you can't tell everything. Oh, no. The way we get over stuff? Yep.

They'd be like, I'm holding on to it. Right. I ain't letting it go. I don't like him. Yeah. I ain't got, I'd be guilty of that with my daughter. Right. She'd tell me stuff about her, man.

I'd be like, mm-mm. I don't know. I don't like it. For sure. everything. I love that. Get the business to yourself and work it out in your house. In your house. That's it right there. You guys got married in 2022 going on four years.

I remember because you all got married right around my birthday. You couldn't make it to my 40th because y'all were Cabo? Cable, yeah. Y'all were in Cahillow getting married. And yeah, we're going to try to make it, but it was just crazy. But what has it been like in these four years? Because it's one thing to date. And then you're blending families, you're blending businesses.

and so many different things. What is that journey been like for the two of you? Marriage is a lot of work, you know, because it's two people trying to become one, you know, operate as one. Like you got to respect this person, you got to move, you know, a certain way. So it does require a lot of work

and respecting each other and just being on one accord. I think over the years, like with me and Red, we, in a beginning, we built a friendship. So even if we do have problems or go through things. Like, it's still a friend there. Like some days I might not like you, but I love you and that's my friend. I got to tell my friend.

I got to talk to my friend. So I feel like that's one thing in a marriage and a relationship that's so important. And I can't stress that enough is becoming friends. Like building that friendship with your partner to where like I got to tell them. That's my person. Like at night, we still going to find a way to talk. Yeah. But I was, what I was trying to say, over the years, we.

You know, we didn't had our ups and downs trying to like learn how to move as one. Yeah. Because that's work when you used to being your own, you know, doing your own thing and moving, never having to really answer to nobody. Yeah. And then you operate in this way. But learning to come together and operate as one is work. Yeah.

But I think one of the biggest things with us, and I think both of us had kind of an issue with it that we all got better with, was, and it's crazy, I saw it today when I was researching. We were so quick to correct each other instead of focusing on connecting. Wow. Oh, that's good. Connect instead of correct. It was all, like for me, I speak for me. I'm real big on, if I don't understand something, I debate with you.

Because I want you to show me where you're coming from. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? I want you to show you. you to show me where you're coming from but over the years with therapy and I get it from I used to have a group of very successful guys and we always talk yeah and it's always debates debates and we call it iron sharpering the iron like we're debating about this we're debating about this but you're showing me you're showing me where you're coming from and you're understanding

and you articulating it and then over with therapy I had to figure out what my people with my village and stuff like that is not necessarily always good because they're not going to get it. And instead of debating and instead of trying to correct, all right, you got it. How can we connect and how can we do that? And I think that was one of the things that we fought with and got better over the years. I was like, why do you have to debate everything that I'm saying? This is not the great debate is. Like this, but over time, like he said, with therapy and everything, it's definitely helped.

Like, now I noticed he don't do that. So what made you want to go to therapy or was it a choice you made on your own or was it's a collective decision where you was like, yeah, I need to. Well, I've been going to therapy since 2012. Wow, that's amazing. He kind of got me into, because at first time it's like very cliche. I need a therapist, so I want to go to see my whatever. But he's been doing it since I met him.

Yeah, I go because, like, you just spoke on. on earlier, I don't tell my friends and family stuff, especially about my relationship. Yeah. Like, I don't, I don't, I don't do that. Like, my friends can't tell you, not one of my friends can tell you our deepest problem or anything like that. Surface level, like, they know what I'm going through with business, family, whatever, but if it's dealing with me and my wife, they can't tell you, they can't tell you what I'm, they can't tell you that. Yeah. So what I do, I go to therapy and I have an unbiased voice that I can talk to and unload. And like some therapy sessions, I kid you not, some therapy sessions, my therapist say one, say two words, go.

And then the last word stop. In between then, all I do is talk. Wow. I just unload and they just dare to listen. They might not, he might not say. nothing well he won't say nothing in between he won't come back he won't say nothing I just sit there and just unload that's good so I don't I don't do the family and friends I don't do the family and friends thing I love that and I think

more men need to hear that because a lot of times guys talk about everything with their friends yeah and a lot of times men aren't the best people to take advice from you know so I love that you protect that and you talk to someone that is a trusted therapist that you can unleash with and let it let it out, but then also know that you have a soft landing place with your wife to say, okay, these are the things that I want to address, you know. And I used to be like that. I used to always have that in me, but it's really, I really keen in on it now. But like even dealing with athletes and stuff like that, my job when I work, like I didn't tell my friends because they used to be some of them just, they ain't got them all. Now they feel away about this person and no telling what's that they'll turn into and different things like that.

So I've been learning that. But now with your partner with your wife, like I just don't, I can't do that. Yeah. I love that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly.

It's so important. And then you said that he's when I got you going to therapy. How has that shifted your mindset on things? It's helped me a lot because I, you know, from my background when I come through, I should have been doing it. Yeah. You know, so it helped me. That was like one of my biggest. changes in life.

Like it just made me see things from a totally different perspective. I love that. Just handle things different. So I thank him for that. Yeah. And thank y'all for sharing because I think the more that we talk about it, especially people, you two are people that people look up to. So the more we talk about it, it makes people be like, oh, there's nothing wrong with me.

I can go talk to somebody. This is actually okay. I think it's important in these days. It's like so important to have a therapist. It really is. An I heart radio experience. You and DePaul with weekend gold tickets to Lassau Montreal Thomas Rhett

Mumford and Sons Well here's my pride and here's my shame John Party, Old Dominion, Carly Pierce and more And the prize gets even sweeter With flights from Porter Airlines Three nights at Residence Inn downtown Montreal And $1,000 cash

Download the free IHeart Radio app Listen to Pure Country for 10 minutes And enter to win Lasso Montreal Every day you listen is another chance to win I love the sounds, the buzzing from the stadium, the chanting from the fans, the announcers calling the place soccer, football, it's home. Why do I watch the World Cup? That's like asking me, why do I breed? I inherited that fandom from my mom.

I like watching it with my dad. It's a connecting force. From Futuro Studios, I'm Fernanda Echabari, and this is American Football, a show about soccer culture in the U.S. and its underdog roots. We go beyond the game to the people and the stories that make it great. A soccer game is a festival.

It's not just a game. It's your culture. I took an elbow to my head which cracked my skull. It is an American game. The Brazilians don't like hearing that, though. Are they the only ones that don't like that? Nobody likes that.

As we get ready for the Men's World Cup this summer, listen to American Football as part of the My Coutura podcast network. available on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby. Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people, like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer,

and that was more difficult. There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What's up, fam? It's Isaiah Thomas. And I'm C.J. Toledano, and our podcast's Point Game is about defining the odds. Like LeBron heading into the playoffs without Luca and Austin Reed. And finding ways to win no matter what.

He's the smartest player to ever play the game. His IQ is at a level that we've never seen before. And he knows without Luca and Austin Reeves, I got to manipulate the game. We get a player's perspective on the challenges of the playoffs. I think Joker's going to be exhausted this series because when they don't have Rudy in the lineup, he has to really guard guys like Nas Reid. He has to guard Julius Randall.

And then he has to give us everything he gives us on the night-to-night bases on offense. And when IT's friends stop by, like Quentin Richardson, we dive into some playoff history too. Steve Nass would get that thing. That man, hell get the flying. He running up the court, licking his fingers, why he got the ball, like,

After you go through a training camp with that Isaiah, you figure it out real quick. Get your ass up and down the court and you're going to get the ball. So listen to Point Game on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Yeah, you guys talk about partnership. What has it been like, you've been really big into fitness. I know you work out with him. I love the weight no more that you all have going on. You're opening up a new gym.

What has that been like really building partnerships together? because you've had your business with hair care and entrepreneurship, all the things that you've done, TV and film. What has it been like merging those worlds together? It's totally different because fitness is definitely something like different for me. And that was the first business that we started together, like doing weight no more. But, you know, I allow him to lead and wherever I can jump in to help. Like, I'm always there to help.

But that's his baby and I'm just supportive, you know, the support of wife. I love that. Where did Waitnamore come from, Fred? Or should I call you Robert, which would be? Come on, man. You already know. And it depends on what day. That dress me as Mr. Rushing.

It came from the quick story. Shoot around in Miami. Me and my clients sitting down on brickel, eating pizza. Kid come up. Look, the kid is overweight, asks for a picture. He was like, okay, cool. The kid walk off. He was so frustrated.

why the parents let the kid get that big, this, that, boom, boom. And seeing his frustration, I said, bro, won't you do something about it? He's like, how can I? I said, let's do a fighting obesity for kids. And so get back to Atlanta. I get with a PR team.

I get with management. We have a meeting. We're going to do a day camp for kids. Long story short, that didn't work out. After that, I had two more clients. about to pitch the idea to nobody will bite on it. And my friend introduced me, my friend told me to come to,

invited me to a 5K, went to the 5K. I didn't run, but I just went. And seeing the turnout, seeing the turn in the black community and everything, and it just hit me like, every night I'm laying beside the perfect person that can help propel this fighting, obesity thing. And I asked her, I said, let's do a 5K.

She was like, I'm not running no 5 miles. And I like, no, it's 3. At the top. I was like, 3. 5,000? And then, so at that point, we did our first 5K, 04 board part. We did our first 5K. We had over 500 people come out.

And the next year, we did, seven different cities. The following year, we had a 12 city tour set up, but COVID hit. We had sponsorships, everything behind it, but COVID hit. And then after that, just getting to my fitness, going through my dad had prostate, the cancer. So just going through that, that's when I got super serious about it and then start training and just touching people, man.

and I just gained a real passion for it. You know, I just gained a real passion for it, and I just stuck with it. Then you created products from that. Like it turns to a full-fledged business. Yeah. That's amazing. My favorite part about that story is I realize I was laying next to the person

that can help me propel this. Yeah, absolutely. And a lot of times I feel like that's in a lot of our situations where it's the people around us that we overlook where it's like, it was in my face the whole time. I got what I need. You have everything you need, but you just don't see it at the moment.

I love that. Yeah, I mean, I'm never naive to who I'm with. I've never been that person. I'm never naive to who I'm with and what she has built over the years. Who she is like, my wife is highly respected. Like, wherever I go, you know, is, oh, that's toy your husband. First, it was toy your baby.

But now, now I'm going to tell you this, though. It's rain daddy. Like, they be like, oh, that's rain dad. Oh, yes. Yeah. But I've never been naive to that point. You know, I've never been naive to, you know, who I'm with. And some men get offended by that.

They'd be like, saw your husband. You know what? Yeah. You know, and if he's just okay. Yeah. Yeah, so I've never been naive about that. I went from Regine's mom to Rain's mom. Yes.

And you will forever be that. My parents are still, oh, you're Crystal and Travis's mom and dad. Like, they've completely lost their identity. They're like, we're in your identity. I love it, though. Yes, I'm sure it's a beautiful badge of honor to wear. Let's talk about blending the families. You all have a beautiful daughter together, but you had children before.

What was that like bringing your families together? Bringing our families together. You know, we're very family-oriented people. Like, we come from his mom and dad. When I tell you, I just, they are sent from heaven, truly one of one, his parents. Our worlds are so different, you know, because he come from like a very, like, loving family. and mine a little bit was dysfunctional, you know? So, like, just seeing how him and his family operating, how his parents is or whatever,

it was so natural, like, because it was all love there. Like, they were all, I just came in and they embraced me. I love that, you know, from the beginning or whatever. And we, that's my babies, just like, that's his babies. Like, we do everything together, whatever. But it was easy because they already had that built in. And then as we got stronger, whatever he introduced me to his kids and they all love me.

Of course they. He is. And she made, and credit to her too, she made it real easy for, you know what I'm saying. She made it real easy for me with the kids and different things like that. And then on the other hand, Regine, it was nothing but love from a jump. You know what I'm saying? And we always had that, yo, I'm never trying to be your dad. I'm here for you.

You know what I'm saying? regardless of what I got to do, I'm here for you. But, you know, so it wasn't never a bad, you know, dynamic or anything. Because at the end of the day, it's about the kids. Yeah. Like, we want to make sure that the kids are good. The kids are comfortable. For sure.

Especially when somebody knew it's coming into the picture. You know, you want to meet their parents. You want to make sure that things are done the right way because it gets messy when you're blending a family. And, you know, the person you blend the family would have, like, like other kids. Yeah, no, for sure. You know, it's just a respect thing. And then with me, I try not to make it difficult because I don't, I mean, I don't want

to be added with child. I want to be, we're one big family. Yeah. I love. I love that. You talk about the different backgrounds of your family and how his family is totally different than yours. Where there are certain things that you had to unlearn when it came to family because

you were used to maybe your family being in a certain way and he was like, no, we got to do it this way. Yeah, I mean, things that I had to unlearn. I would say, what had to unlearn? I don't think necessarily unlearn, but just take that wall down. Oh, yeah. She, you had a big wall down. One thing about Toya, one thing about Toya, she was from the trauma she went through.

Toya was so guarded. Mm-hmm. Yeah. She was so guarded and so, so guarded and so scared. she feared she was very fearful yeah you know what I'm saying not trying to go back for sure not trying to go back not trying to deal with what she dealt with she was so guarded I made it here I think I heard lebrun say that one time and it remind me of her like not going back to where I was so she just had a wall up and just had to knock that down and just like yo I'm here for you like is we can take on

the whole world together. Like, it ain't no going back and forth, regardless of what we go through, we can get through that. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? It took a minute to get to that point, you know, because after being heard and just going through everything I went through as a kid and just my trauma. But I ain't going to lie.

He got over there. Well, I was, I was like, it took the minute to kind of, you know, just let it down, let the guard down. Yeah. She was a right. I was like, I don't know. I don't know what she would do about me. kid like after I had rain.

Are you serious? Oh wow, you still like guarded. Wow. I don't know what she would do without me. She was a wreck. Now that was a wrecked. Why he's like my daddy? She just, let's come bobby.

She's good. Tell them, don't please. Bray just stayed. No, but honestly, like that's, and just thinking about it now, like that's really something she dealt with. Yeah. It's a test of where she. And I think that.

I know, you never seen me with a celebrity girl or anything like that. You've never seen that. And the thing that brought me and her close is just seeing everything she came, because I saw Antonia. You know what I'm saying? I saw Antonio. Everybody was looking at Toya and just seeing everything she fought through, everything she went through. Like, I think it just like, yo, I like her. You know what I'm saying?

I like her. And it's just that, you know, it's a. test of what she have overcame over the years like just being that center point of her family everything being blamed for everything just going through this and nobody had that idea but at the end of the day I'm the one there where when she's crying when she need comfort when she need this but the internet's seeing something else but this is a real person going through real stuff trying to heal everybody she loved. And heal herself in real time

in front of everybody. That's a lot. It was. That's a lot. If you don't mind, share with us what was a breaking point in that moment where you were like, I feel like I'm finally overcoming this. I know you talk about it. Even after rain, you still had that wall up.

I can't imagine. We've heard stories of what you went through, but I can't imagine what that's like in real time, living it out in public and trying to really heal while healing your family. What was that breaking point for you? For me it was like I was I started to see like what I was like see myself like toy this is not okay like you you literally trying to save everybody and you're losing you wow so it was one of the moments where I had to get back to me like in my family that I'm creating

because I spend so much time like trying to I don't know pour into everybody else and everything else And I'm like, I have a beautiful family here. My kids watching me hurt. They're watching me go through things over and over again. It's like a cycle just constantly being repeated. And I say it's time for me to make a change. And I told myself that I was going to change. I'm not doing this no more.

I'm going to go to therapy, you know, get some help. My husband was right there, you know, by my side or whatever. And I got through it. And now today, I can honestly say totally different person. I have that. I don't give up. attitude it's about me and mine I love like the family I'm creating yes I just can't go backwards with what I just don't like the way it made me to about two years it's like it really

did it's about two years it's but kudos to you for like you know what I'm saying really fighting for that and fighting for love because some people like give up so quick I feel like we are in this microwave society where we want we want it now but to have a partner that will stick beside you and somebody who sees you yeah you know that that's the biggest part he saw you not the Toya that the world sees. So that's beautiful. I saw seeing my kids, like me take, like, oh, it was, I don't ever want to go back to that girl.

Yeah. Yeah. Like, just, my kids just seeing me just so hurt all the time, like, feeling defeated. Yeah. Like, Ray was like, yo, like, you know, I'm looking at my husband watching this and my kids watching this. It's like, Toya, it's time for you to focus on you, baby, girl. Yeah.

And I've watched your show. And seeing, like, even the. sit down with your family and sometimes those are the biggest fights. I was like, my girl is, baby. You was, I was like, whoo, it was a lot in what people expect to the expectations and getting over like what people expect from you. And it's just like this, I just, you owe this to me energy, you know, and the fact that you were able to get over that, I love that.

Yes, I'm, oh, feels amazing. Yes, I can honestly say that. I did want to ask you, going from what we can say, a talk relationship to finally be in love properly. What does that feel like? If you want to tell Red Hat, oof, like it feels very safe to just know you with someone who truly love you, who appreciate you, who make you feel seen, who make you feel heard, and who make you feel safe.

Yeah. Because as women, that's really what we want. You know, and nothing is perfect and no one is perfect. We have our disagreements and things we don't see eye to eye with, but I just still feel like that's my person no matter what. Yeah. You know, I feel like I found my person. Somebody I could build with, grow with, get old with. Like, the family I always wanted and pray for.

Like, the things that we do, I remember years ago, I used to literally pray for these moments of just having a family and just pouring into my kids and showing them all this love and being able to have a partner that's doing life with me, like a present father. Yes. You know, like it's just, it just feels amazing, honestly. How does it make you feel red to hear that?

Great. Absolutely great. Because that's at this point in my life, that's what, it's, I always been a family man. But as you, as you know, just traveling, there are different crews I'm with, working with, my friends and different things like that. They had a big place in my life. You know what I'm saying? Moving around, had a big place of my life. Now the biggest place in my life is my family.

So I'm working all week. It's a whole different, whole different switch. I'm working all week and I'm looking forward to the weekends to chill with my wife, to chill. And like I really feel like we're out of the city, we're in the middle of nowhere, and it just feels so good coming home. I love that. Let me tell you, he just said a word, because I've heard,

heard so many husbands say like when I get home I just need to sit in the car because I don't even want to walk in the house to say it feels so good to go home. It just feels so good. A lot of people don't have that. That's not their revelation. It feels so good to come home. And I tell myself every single day how blessed I am. Like every single day I tell myself and my first thing I do in the shower, I have a talk

with God. and I just say thank you and just be grateful for my life. Absolutely. I remember Ray used to say all the time, like he used to talk about peace. Like the number one thing in life for me is peace. And I used to be literally looking at him like crazy with a side eye. Fast forward because I was younger and my mind was just at a different place. Back then it was for I just want to travel

I just want to do this I want to do this I want to I was just at a different place in my life I was not where I am today When I tell you he said a word Because that is literally what I live for Peace the most that's the best thing You could ever have is a peace of mind

Just be at peace And I feel like that's where our life is right now Like we block out all the chaos And the crazy stuff Like I didn't cut time with people that I just, I can't. I don't even talk. It's people I ain't talked to in like two years family.

Wow. Like, I had to just let it go because it does not bring peace in my life. You got to cut it off. And if it don't bring peace in my life, you got to go. I don't care who you are. And that's how I am. I'm like that too. It's just like I do, it's people that I do genuinely miss.

Yeah. Like, I miss them. Yeah. I miss the relationship we had. I miss them. I'm so cool. I miss you, but stay where you.

I'm so good. Yo, I am so cool with it. I love you. I miss you, but I'm cool. I am so cool with it. It's fine. Like, yo, I wish you the best. I wish you the best. But I am so, I am so, I'm a thousand percent cool with it.

I feel you on that. No. And I think that's okay. You know, that's life. That's evolution. Yeah, we grow. We do grow. We grow.

Like I've seen it. I'm literally over. here like I wanted to cry one point I'm like dang like red really grew up yeah we listen like this is beautiful listen so good yeah I love it I love it red you are a father you know and for fathers who are maybe trying to figure it out you know you guys have like really worked on this but for the fathers that are out there because father's day is coming up for fathers who are trying to figure it out with blended families and how to make things work what is some advice that you could give to them.

Man, it's hard. It's hard. And everybody won't be blessed with a toy. Come on. You know what I'm saying? Because I don't think people realize the dynamic people go through trying to show up for their kids, show up for their wife, show up for their family, like different things like that.

It's hard. It's just one, I think we got to take accountability. I chose to have a child with this person. And we got to get through this. Like it didn't work. We got to get through this and just realize like, okay, it's going to be a sacrifice. We can't sit there and just think everything will go our way. It's going to be a sacrifice.

And you just got to try to figure out what best for the kids. That's real. I love it. Yeah. Happy Pride Month, Toronto. Pride is an opportunity for you to create your own space, to celebrate your existence. Iheart Radio is proud to be an official sponsor of Pride Toronto Festival, and we won't stop. Celebrate Pride.

Turn up the love and listen to IHeart Pride Canada. Your 24-7 radio stream and the only playlist you need for your Toronto Pride celebrations. Pride is so great because it gives a whole bunch of people this visibility that they've never had before. We have a ton to see. To celebrate Toronto, happy pride. I heart radio. I love the sounds. The buzzing from the stadium, the chanting from the fans, the announcers calling the place, soccer, football, at home.

Why do I watch the World Cup? That's like asking me, why do I breed? I inherited that fandom from my mom. I like watching it with my dad. It's a connecting force. From Futuro Studios, I'm Fernanda Chavari, and this is American football, a show about soccer culture in the U.S. and its underdog roots. We go beyond the game to the people and the stories that make it great.

A soccer game is a festival. It's not just a game. It's your culture. I took an elbow to my head, which cracked my skull. It is an American game. The Brazilians don't like hearing that, though. Are they the only ones that don't like that? Nobody likes that. As we get ready for the Men's World Cup this summer, listen to American. football as part of the MyCultura podcast network, available on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Hoda Kotby, host of the podcast, Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby.

Together, we're going to have meaningful conversations with the world's most fascinating people, like when actress Olivia Munn shared how she overcame fierce health challenges. I've gone through breast cancer and then helped my mother through breast cancer, and that was more difficult. There's a lot of people who understand postpartner depression. I was not prepared for postpartum anxiety. Listen to Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby on the IHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

What's up, fam? It's Isaiah Thomas. And I'm C.J. Toledano, and our podcast Point Game is about defying the odds. Like LeBron heading into the playoffs without Luca and Austin Reed. And finding ways to win no matter what. He's the smartest player to ever play the game. His IQ is at a level that we've never seen before. And he knows. Without Luca and Austin Reeves, I got to manipulate.

the game. We get a player's perspective on the challenges of the playoffs. I think Joker's going to be exhausted this series because when they don't have Rudy in the lineup, he has to really guard guys like Nas Reed. He has to guard Julius Randall. And then he has to give us everything he gives us on the night-to-night basis on offense. And when IT's friends stop by, like Quentin Richardson, we dive into some playoff history too. Steve Nash would get that thing.

That man, hell get to fly. He running up the court, licking his fingers, why he got the ball like, I think. You go through a training camp with that Isaiah, you figure it out real quick. Get your ass up and down the court, and you're going to get the ball. So listen to Point Game on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Do you think that men sometimes get discouraged from showing softness or commitment and emotional presence in our society? Absolutely. Because we was taught to be hard.

We was taught to be, I just said this on our couples time episode. So it's just I then became, I got to the point where I'd be seeing I'm so sensitive when it comes to the kids. Like, rain can do something. I'd be like, man, look at this punk. I just know I'm a punk. Like, she just, you know what I'm saying? Like, it did.

I mean, really all of them. Like, I just be like, really. And then, you know, it's so bad. It's just, we talk, and we just talk to be so hard, be so tough. But it's just, and I'm just saying for me, man, my kids, my kids is my everything. So it's just a special place in my heart that, like, they really can do what they want to do. Like, it's just being like, no, you cannot. Like, I don't, I admit, I don't know.

It's good cop, bad cop in our house all the time. And they all roll their eyes when I step in. You're right if I hear she go. Because I'm because the daddy is just going to let them just, it's ice cream at midnight. If they up, like they, why they can't have it? And the thing is, though, but the thing is, every, each one of my kids know and respect me. So when I say no is no, when I say they're not going to play with me, they know when they're getting over on me or whatever, whatever, they know I'm letting that go. Because when I say do this or do that, it ain't no, they're not going to play with Daddy.

You know what I'm saying? It ain't no thing where they go. You know, they still have that fear of their father. You know what I'm saying? So the other stuff I'm allowing. And I know I'm allowing it. Right. You know.

Because if I call, I be like, I'm calling your dad. Rain, she respects her dad. Even though she runs circles around me. My dad going to do. When I say I'm calling your dad, she going to get right. I know that's right. I love that. And it ain't like he going to talk.

Mean to her. What does she do? Right. What's she do? Yeah, that's what? He's like, all right. Like, what? You know.

Rain, listen to your mom. Like, Rain, do this. I be like, Ray is an amazing father. Girl, when I tell you, yesterday, Rain had ice cream social at school. It just be like the little things. Like, we don't miss nothing at our kids. This is off script. I'm sorry, this is off script.

But she had, I love the school she go to. I love her school. What the hell is an ice cream social? anything. I ain't gonna lie y'all. Sis, it just be- Rhea was like, we gotta go to what? I get up at 3 o'clock. I get up at 3 o'clock.

I drop 45 minutes back home, take a shower, about to take me a nap because I have to go back out later. She said, we gotta go to ice cream social. So I look at her like, no, no, no, no. She said, we gotta go to rain school. She's having something. So then I get dressed and stuff.

You didn't tell me what it was. Oh, but when I said when we was pulling up, when we pulled up, she said ice cream social. I'm like, what is that? that. We go outside and watch our kids eat ice cream. That's it. We literally take the ice cream out of the pack, put it in a bowl, put toppings.

It's a line to put toppings on the ice cream, and we watched them. And they didn't even want to be bothered us. She was all the way down in my hair. You're like, why am I here? Rain came, gave me a hug, introduced me to a friend, and they went and sat down. But if we wasn't there, oh, it would have been a good problem. My mom. didn't come. No, my thing is why I had to go. Because we're a team. But no, I, since I

didn't get it. I was so mad. But I really should have left you out of that one thing. I was so mad. And then the other dad there, me and him, me and him not bonded. He said, man, I feel like I'm at a zoo somewhere. Like, what are we doing? It was just so, rain school have all type of stuff. Every week. Every week. It's just if they're not planting in a garden, come garden day. they're not doing this, dad, ice cream social, they're stinging in the, on a black top. They're doing something every week. They're going to find something these kids to do. And I tell you, I love it though.

And me and Ray would be right there. Because, you know, your kids look, oh, I miss this with me. Yeah. You know, they have those. Her dad did, like, come to, like, important things, like a birthday and stuff like that. But stuff at school and stuff, no. So, they be looking like, damn, y'all go to everything. They get raised school.

So I can get none of that. I ain't get none of that. that. I'd be like, oh, shoot. You didn't, baby. I was young. I barely made it. I love that. In closing, I do want to ask you both. I know you have couples time.

Is there any more businesses? You have the gym opening up. Is there anything else you can tell us? We want to make sure we can support you and get the word out. Yeah, we do have our YouTube channel. It's called The Russian World. We do the series called Couple's Time there. We have our new Wait No More studios, which is like not that far from here. in Atlanta. Open and real soon. We're going to have our grand opening real soon.

Make sure we get the invite. We'll come. I still have my, I just did a rebrand of my before bed heads, the luxury hair ties and bonnics and stuff like that. So I'm trying to do something like different with that. Thank you for keeping us cute at night. Yeah, we got to keep it cute at night. Yes.

Yeah, we really love when I wear my bono. I know that's right. Absolutely. And what else? What's what's going on? We got a lot of stuff going on. In our content. Yes, I'm loving the content.

Thank you. It is so funny. Now, that one where you rode on his leg and then the next minute he was naked, I hollered. My mother-in-law said, what are y'all doing? I said, I'm sorry. It was so funny. Because that's how many and think immediately.

My home boy, Bank hit me. Bank said, well, you don't went all the way with this content. Well, you don't got naked. And then Red is so funny, though, y'all. Like, he's funny without trying to be funny. So some stuff I'll be like, okay, let's do this. Ray be like, and he'd be like, okay. But then he bring me crazy stuff for this.

Yeah, no, it's so good. And she's short, and go back to what you said, but I do want to give her her props. Well, like, she's been absolutely killing it this year. My baby was the Grand Marshal for a Disney black history parade. Like that was, that was insane. Like, you know, and stuff she's doing with Disney and just major brands and stuff. But, like, she got a lot of stuff going on. She over here trying to down play it.

I love that. I love that. She hosting a 5K with the mayor in Montgomery this weekend. Like, she's running. Yeah, girl. I'm going to get my little, you know, I be doing my pretty girls walk. Yes, I love that. Walk it off this, so I'm going to do that in Montgomery this week.

That's going to fun. I'm proud of you. That is amazing. Thank you for hyping her up. And you, I got to take this time. I got to take this time. See, y'all know Christa. I know Crystal.

I know Crystal. And I want to say I'm so proud of you, saying. And you know for the last few years, you always get a random text. And I tell you, I love you. And I'm proud of you. Just seeing everything you've accomplished. Now we got the hair care. that it's about to go crazy.

And just all this stuff, this, the pot, the movies, the TV show. I am super proud of you. Yes, we got to give you your flowers. From sitting down our conversations, hugging each other, being there for you. Like, I really love what you have done. I appreciate that. Hey, the sky's the limit. I love your team.

You got an amazing team. They are incredible. And, yo, I love it. Thank you so much. So congratulations. Thank you both. Thank you. I love y'all.

Seriously. Before we get out of here, in this season, we are leaning more into being unapologetic. That's what the hair care line is called. But it's called that because I am walking in a season of just being unapological. How you said, I don't give a, about what you say. I'm doing what's good for me. In this season for both of you, what are you most unapologetic about? What I'm most unapologetic about?

just me for me just being okay with saying no that was something that for the longest it was hard for me to do yeah i used to like oh but i could do it but no yes and i'm standing on that and i'm unapologetic about it period i love that if i don't feel comfortable with it or if it's something i don't want to do i'm moving in a season if i don't want to do it and it don't feel right with me i'm not doing it period for sure that's good i love that red Oh, unapologetic about it? What are you being unapologetic about? Everything, nothing.

Like, nothing. Like, whatever it is, it is. I don't care. Like, I really don't care. I don't, again, if my family's straight, that's what it is. Like, I ain't apologizing. No, fine. You take it how you want to take it.

You roll how you want to roll with it. It is what it is. I love it. Hey, that's what it is. That is what it is. I love you both. And thank y'all so much for sitting down. I know our community loves you.

Make sure you guys tap into their YouTube channel, rushing world, watch couples time. And if you're in Atlanta, hit the gym, do everything, whatever you can do, tap in with them. I love everything you all are doing. You're doing amazing things and making an impact. And you keep it in positive, sweetie while doing it. So we appreciate it.

Yes, thank you guys. Thank you. What I appreciate most about this conversation is that it reminds us that healthy love is not just about chemistry. It's about friendship, intention, growth, and choosing each other over and over again. Even while building publicly, Toya and Red have found a way to protect the foundation underneath it all. Thank you both for your honesty, your warmth, and for allowing us into your world.

Thank you also for tuning into another episode of Keep It Positive, sweetie. Don't forget to download the Season 11 Kipps Reflection Guide at chrisornehazel.com. Subscribe and share this episode with someone who needs it. And if you ever need advice, positivity, or just want to share what you're going through, email us at keep it positive outcomes at gmail.com. As always, stay blessed, stay encouraged. And you already know, keep it positive, sweetie. I'll see you guys next time. It's that time to put on your jersey and wave your flag, whoever you root for.

Why do I watch the walk up? That's like asking me, why do I breed? And it's beautiful. The guys are young and cute and fat. It's not just a game. It's your culture. I like watching it with my dad. It's a connecting force.

From Futuro Studios, I'm Fernanda Chavari, and this is American Football, a show about soccer culture in the U.S. and its underdog roots. Listen to American Football on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Joy is essential, and it's also elusive. But now, there's a new and exciting way to start your journey toward a more joyful existence. In instance, Joy 101. It's a new podcast hosted by me, Hoda Kotby. If you're craving inspiration to maximize your joy, tune into these candid, uplifting, and moving on-air chats.

Open your free IHeart Radio app. Search Joy 101 and listen now. Joy 101 with Hoda Kotby is presented by CVS. Can superstars even exist the way they used to? 2016 was sort of that last era of monoculture, where we still consume things in community. Everybody wanted to be Beyonce at that point. I don't think we'll ever see another beyond.

What does it mean to be black and eat in America? You will never make me feel bad for being a black girl, for being a black American girl, ever. From music to food to the conversations shaping black culture right now, therapy for black girls is bringing it all to the mic. Listen to therapy for black girls on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. It just came out.

What did you just do? You just sit yourself up for failure. I've never heard you tell this story. I've never told this story. This must have been tucked deep, deep in the Jeremy Lin file. My name is MC Jin. I'm excited to tell you about laugh, but not least. I'll be chatting with guests from all walks of life about the power of humor when it comes to facing difficult times.

These will be conversations that remind us all, life is hard. Laugh harder. Listen to laugh but not least with MCJN on the IHeart Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. This is an IHeart podcast. Guaranteed human.