Keep it Positive, Sweetie - Redefining Modern Womanhood w/ Karen Pitttman

Episode Date: October 26, 2025

This week, actress Karen Pittman joins us for a powerful conversation about womanhood, motherhood, and living with intention. From writing letters to her characters to redefining what fulfillment looks like, Karen shares how imagination and purpose guide her through every season of life. Visit: CrystalReneeHayslett.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Calling all my sweeties to the forefront. I'm your host, Chris Renée and Hazel, and this is the Keep It Posit Sweetie Show. I guess this week has been in our minds, but after the Netflix series Forever, she is forever seeming it in our hearts. Kids family, please give a very warm welcome to Karen Pittman. Karen, thank you so much. I'm sorry for all the technical difficulties this morning. No.

Thank you for your patience. You look absolutely stunning. So beautiful. I've been trying so hard to get, to keep it positive, sweetie. Do you know what I mean? I'm trying so hard to get on here. I know. I remember we met each other.

It was about two years ago at Essence Women of Hollywood, and you were in the line with Chantal, and I had just started watching the morning show, and I was like, oh, my goodness. I was like, it's Karen Pittman. And Chantel introduced us, and I was so excited to meet you. And you were just, the first time I watched the show

and you came across the screen, I was like, who is this woman? You literally radiate through the screen. You really do. Oh, I'm so glad. It's a really good show. It's a good platform for the stories that I like to tell. And, you know, how important it is to surround yourself with people who really want to do the thing you want to do.

But also will run at the pace. Right. Run. And these folks are keeping up the pace that I like to tell stories at. and it's a real gift to be on the show. I'm excited for you to see season four. I cannot wait. So excited.

Cannot wait. What was it at an early age that really drove you to the arts that made you want to pursue acting and singing? I think really it was a strong desire to self-express. I don't think it was any. Nobody in my family had this desire. or had this need as much as I did. And I was one of those young girls with big feelings, like big feelings.

Like no one knew how to help me process any of the stuff that I was going through. No one knew how to talk me down. No one knew how to get me out of my moods. And it was really about going into that space as a child and into my imagination. It was imagination work. And that's some of the most important work I think that children do when they just have time to play. Part of the challenge with technology and devices is that children don't experience those, that other side, the other emotional side that we try to keep them away from happiness. And oh, everyone's joyful.

And actually, there's aspects to life that you contend with emotionally that are a little dark. And as a child, you build up emotional resilience, right? Yes. And for me, I did that at very early age. I was just born with a lot of big feelings. So singing and acting was my way of processing some of it. And my parents just left me alone to go do it. I love it.

Were you an only child? No, I have four other siblings. And they could be actors. Do you know what I mean? They're not. Yeah. Because they have their own drama. But it was a big family.

It was a family of seven. Wow. Yeah, yeah. And we're all still close, but have, you know, our paths, I've diverged. And my brother, my eldest sister and my brother live in Nashville. Wow. Yeah. I have a doctor.

Yeah. Really? My sister just got her doctor. She also works in the health field as well. And she lives in Nashville. Oh, amazing. Yeah. Oh, wow.

She went to Hume Fogg, super smart. So I'm sure you're familiar with Hume Fogg. Wow, are you kidding me? Am I coming? Yeah. Yes, that's where she went to high school. I was talking to somebody the other day in National. They were like, yeah, White's Creek.

I was like, White's Creek. Do you remember White's Creek High School? Yes, yes. Such a long time ago. I was like, oh, my God. Yes. It's such a small world. I love that your parents allowed you to be

free because a lot of times, especially when in black culture, they have so much structure because we've had to, right? So the fact that your parents allows you to be free and look who you've become because of that freedom is so beautiful. I love that in the way you're able to express yourself. Yes. So most recently, um, you captivated our screens with forever. It is a culture phenomenon. Like we absolutely, absolutely love yourself. Listen. It changed. It changed. So, that thing changed. Yeah, it did. Never been a part of anything like that.

Huge, huge, huge, huge. So good. Like, I was glued to the screen. Like, next, next episode, it was so good. Mara had talked about you and her being friends for a long time. What was that process like? Because I know when writers are writing, there's characters or people that come to their mind as they're writing like, wait, this is Karen Pittman.

Was that one of those moments where Mara called and said, I got a role for you or is this something you had to actually audition for it? No, I did not audition for it. And we, well, Mar and I came back into each other's lives in a real way in 2009. And I was pregnant with my daughter and we started spending time together as mothers. And, you know, I'd always known that she's a writer. she's doing extraordinary television shows over decades of times

centering black women and I just admired her and supported her as a friend of course I'm an actor but I just never thought about you know Crystal you get to you get to a point in your life when you understand that you don't need to

actually access someone for their resources like your relationships don't need to be transatlanticians transaction. I wish everybody knew that. Yes. Yes.

Some people in my life are just there. They're CEOs. They're doing things. You know, is there a synergy between what I do and their brand or between what I do and their writing or what I do and they're directing? Probably. But it's really just about supporting that friendship, supporting that relationship and being there for that person.

And so for many, many years, that was. me and Mara. And we went on a girl's trip to go see Usher in Vegas, the very, very last show. We have a friend in Usher's publicist. So he got us some tickets. And, you know, we were, Hey, you know, we were trying to deal it. And we were doing it all. And we woke up there. Just hung out girlfriends. Yes. You need that. That's so important. we needed it so badly I didn't even realize it but the sphere was you know

had just open like we were just vibing just fiving and next morning went to have breakfast and she said you know I'm doing this thing I'm doing this character she had seen me in a play that a sister named Dominique Mariso had written years ago

called Pipeline and it was about a mother who was grappling with her daughter her son maybe ending up in the school to prison pipeline which you know is so serious, it's very serious and a real thing in our community in this country. And so she loved that role. And that was really the last time I had done a mother role that had depth and nuance and layers written by, obviously, a black woman. But I had been offered other things in between, but not with the same nuances, not with the same, you know, care.

So Amara, you know, asked me about, hey, would you have some time to look at this, I was like, girl, let me see what you got. Right. And so stop playing around. You're Mar-Brock a Q. Right.

That part. Let me see that. Let me see that job. Yes. So, yeah, and it just was synergistically, it just worked. In so many ways, Dawn is like that mom that we all know, but like just recently came into herself. Do you know?

We couldn't have seen her like, 10 years ago. Right. Yeah. We believed that she existed. Well, with the visibility of an African-American president and an African-American first lady. Yes.

And the visibility of people like Stacey Abrams and Tony Morrison and Oprah Winfrey, we suddenly understand that there are black women who have incredible wisdom, uh, who, uh, who, um, represent feminism in many different ways, but are very, very wealthy. Yes. They've carved out financial independence for themselves and been able to lift their families at the same time. We really do believe that that person exists in the world.

So this was me throwing my hat in the ring of what a ambitious and well-intentioned and ferocious, wealthy mother looks like in the black community who's grounded in love and community. you know that's this is my take on it as an artist I know so many women like dawn my mother was a version of dawn she aspired to be don in many ways yes I'm certainly her child in that way yeah oh no you captivated don it was it was perfect and like there was no other person to play that role you were the perfect fit for it and you and wood like I love the whole family dynamic actually got to interview your son on the show justin um When was it, B.T.

Michael. Michael, yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The BT Media House. Yeah, Michael Cooper Jr. I got to introduce him, interview him, and he was such a light, and he talked about how amazing it was working with the both of you and working with Mara and just the experience that he took from that coming from Texas and just kind of looking around like, do I belong

here? And how you all rallied around him and made sure that he really. was comfortable in that space because I know how daunting it can be sitting I don't know for sure but I can imagine how daunting it would be sitting in between you and would and be like what is going on right now? Yeah, yeah.

The great part about Michael is that he's smart enough to know that he doesn't know everything. You know, he's not one of those. He's smart enough to know that he doesn't know everything and he's open to other people's wisdom. But also, I mean, me and Wood, We're simply like tap into the wisdom that you already have inside of you. And he is Justin.

So many ways he's believable because he is Justin. And he's really just starting. He's such an incredible artist. And I think you guys are going to see him evolve in this beautiful way over his career. I can't wait to see what happens. But this character was a perfect fit for him. Perfect fit. No, it definitely was.

I love the way Morris. showed the black community in different dynamics. He talked about you being the wealthy family, but then you go to the not so wealthy part of town and it still shows the beautiful family dynamic. And the different characters, even love his dad

about how he was a little out there, but it shows all these different characters and how even in the craziness were all so much alike than not. And I want to ask you, when it came to playing that part, what were

some of your real life experiences that you pulled from to really to really captivate and create your character the way you did real life experiences well i have a son who's entering college this year and so you know yeah so to have the anxiety and the drama yes of trying to get your son to finish his college application um to formulate a plan and then stick with it you know when John says, when he says, well, you just got it all planned out. And she's like, no, no, we have a plan. That was definitely taken from my life. My son looked at, my kids looked at forever with me.

Okay. And they were a lot, because they never looked at any of my stuff. They really wanted to see it. And I got the series during Black History Month in February of Black. You got, y'all got it in May. I could watch it in February. Right. And they watched it with me.

and they were like, they wanted to binge-wash the whole thing, one after the other, after the other, after the other, after the other. And they were like, Mom, we've had that conversation. My son said, we've had that conversation. A few times. Right. So that was definitely something that I took, that love and affection and real sense of respect and admiration, which is a very important form of love. I think people underestimate the importance of admiration. for someone in your life.

You admire them deeply is the same experience I have with my partner, Aide, my fiancé. And I brought that to my relationship with Wood, just this real respect for him. And that's something to show your children. Absolutely. No, for sure. You talked about actually getting a watch. This is the first show your children actually watch with you. How did that feel as a mother to say?

sit down and watch a show that your children wanted to binge watch. It was great. I mean, they didn't, I thought are they going to, first I thought, are they going to like it? Right. And as an actor, you know, you're picking yourself, you're like, why did I wear that in that scene? Oh, my God. But then they, you know,

what ended up happening and resonating with me was this sense of them understanding, you know, what I'm doing where I am when I'm not with them they know the only only thing as important to them is this life I live where a purpose hopefully I'm doing something in the world and sharing myself and actualizing and self-realizing but so uh you know okay so it is what you do yeah yeah they see that's for you though because all they see is like you know the Instagram, the social media work, you know, all that kind of stuff. But there is a lot of work

that goes into it. And I think it sort of suddenly dawned on them. That, oh, this is actually good. This is why you do all this. Interesting. Yeah. When it comes to being a mother and balancing your career and balancing motherhood, what are some of the principles and things that you put in a place so that you can balance it well. Well, you know, Crystal, this is my perspective on having it all. It's a juggle. You can't have one ball in your hand for very long before you throw on the other one out, right? Right.

So that's my perspective on it. And it's about prioritizing. But I think one of the things I share with actually all the women that I work with, because I have a great privilege of working with Mara, and it's a woman-led, woman-centric sort of. production and set. And then I had this great privilege of honor working with Mimi and

Janet Reese and Charlotte on the morning show. Yes. And at the bottom of all of these choices is this very intentional decision to do it with love, to do it with care, to do it in a thoughtful way.

And there's nothing, you know, flip about how these choices are made, how we live and, you know, what we do, the shows we, the episodes, you know, that we work on, the things that, there's a very intentional space. And I found that that's very important with family. Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Yeah. Who's around my kids? Who comes into my home? You know, I saw sinners. You don't invite everybody into your home. Come on. I saw, I heard Brian, I say, yeah, Brian, that's exactly right. yes everybody could not come into your house no everybody can come in here no thank you um so all of that

it's just very intentional that's one of the things that i put in place intentional yeah that's amazing what about you um well i'm not a mom so really for me it's balancing no i know that i mean but you have family right around you and how do you what's your yeah um honestly i plan vacations with them when i have downtime i make sure i bring everybody out so we can have some time together and just be present. You know, for me, I'm always traveling. I'm always working. And that time, especially as I get older and I realize that my time with my parents is fast, as quickly dwindling down, it's like I need to make the most of these moments where I have them with me. So I enjoy, I call them my kids now. I'm like, all right, kiddos, where are we doing next? So I love spending

time with my parents. And I have siblings and they have children. So spending time with them is a lot of fun. For Labor Day, we just took a, we did like a yacht day in Miami. And I took the kids to the Ice Cream Museum. And we did a beach day so they could build sandcastles. So I do all the things that I would do by my children. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

You have fun. Trying to bring them into my world and share the fruits of my labor, honestly. Yeah. So, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I do. Yeah, it's a good time. You talked about playing the role in Pipeline, and I want to know, because that was such an emotionally intense role.

For me, when I'm playing Fatima, it takes me a little while to come out of that character. How long does it take you to come out of characters, especially something like this in Pipeline? Pipeline was hard. That was eight shows a week, eight shows a week, six days. right uh a week um you know i i couldn't when i'm doing a play i can't i can't in it yeah i just don't and i try not to take too many roles like that where you bring them home my kids were very young at the time so it wasn't as as tough on them but you know same level of anxiety that dawn has but much more um a lot of things were manifesting in her in

in Naya's son, the characters saying Naya, and Naya's son, that were really much more urgent for her. But at the end of, what I will say is at the end of every season with the character, no matter, if I'm working on television,

no matter how long or short the season is, if I'm doing a character, I'll write them a letter at the end. Really? I love it. Yeah, with Fatima or whatever you're working on. I write, I write a letter to the character at the end. of the season and I and I and I because we share this space we share a body yeah and that's a real

that's a world in and of itself yeah um so I write our letter and I I thank her for all the experiences that we've had and I sort of you know in my own way sort of share what I felt what impacted me and you know say I'm going to say goodbye now we're going to see each other again and I'm sure they will whatever but great job and talk to you soon and all that kind of stuff. It's really helpful. I can imagine that being helpful. I'm going to take that on.

I like that idea. Yes. I never thought about that. Because it's hard enough to kind of say goodbye. You guys have a very intense schedule, right? We do, yeah. Right. Yeah.

So you run the gamut of emotions, right? And you really do have to take care of yourself. Yeah. No, I do. I'm telling you, like when I come out of filming, I literally feel like I'm, schizophrenic. Like, I feel like I've lost my mind because it's so many different ranges of emotions in two weeks where I'm like, my body doesn't know the difference. My body doesn't

know that I'm acting. It's like, do we need to go admit yourself into a psych word? Like, what's happening right now? You do. You need to have a therapist. If you're an actor, you don't have a therapist. That's a hard thing. You know what I mean? Like, you absolutely, because you do have to run through those actual emotions. And those things live in your body. I mean, people talk a lot about it. Acting is not a mental. thing. Acting is really, really physical, emotional. There's a psychological kinesthetic experience. And so, yeah, yeah, I certainly have that experience. And in my shows, we don't run through our work at a sort of marathon pace. It's very, rather a sprint. You guys run through

it at a sprint. We run it at a marathon. So you're constantly conserving energy and not letting it all out. I love that. The thing about the morning show is that we, or even forever is it, human beings don't change that much. So the conditions upon which you actually let it out have to be a very extreme. And that maybe happens once in a season, not over episodes of time. Do you know what I mean? Right. Absolutely.

Yes. Oh, my goodness. No, for sure. You had mentioned in an interview with Feeding America that it takes a lot of strength to be a single mom and it takes even more strength and resilience to be a single parent while facing hunger and trying your hardest to put on the table for your kids. The biggest obstacle was overcoming the shame I felt. And in this Kip's community, I know there are single parents and we are living in a day where the economy is, the unemployment rates are at an all-time high,

but the cost of living is not going down. How did you overcome the shame that you felt during that time. And why do you feel like you felt shame? You didn't put yourself in that predicament. Why do you think you felt that? Well, I mean, I absolutely felt like there was some part of it that I needed to be accountable for. I needed to be responsible for so many things to affect your quality of life, including the relationships, the people you have in it. And I had a lot of people in my life that were undermining my ability. to move forward. I had to, you know, detach from them. Yeah. And I understood that because those people had my attention, and I was paying them a lot of attention. By paying, I mean, you know what I mean?

Like I had attention to spend, you know what? And I didn't. I needed to be focused on it. So in the areas where I needed to be responsible. I had to look at that and I had some shame around it. The shame is one of those interesting things. Shame. The word should derives from shame. I should have done. It's an interesting thing as a human being. In that condition, you can either use it to motivate you or you can use it to stay down. And my parents were manifesters, you know, my parents raised in Jim Crow. So they had to think very strategically about how they were going to live in the world and still be able to be successful and still be joyful and raise children that were joyful. Right. Well, I come from that stock.

That's in my DNA. That's genetic for me. So the way that I dealt with my feeling of shame and the stigma was really just to be reminded of where I came. from whom I belong to or to whom I belong and to really deliberate and think about my parents and what they had been through is one of those times where you think of to your pet like they had five kids yeah I have two and I am I am not doing what I need to do with my children and how do I make that okay I made some mistakes yeah to be in the human condition is to make mistakes.

Absolutely. I do feel like part of being a human is failing, is accepting failure, and not as a worst possible thing to happen, but as a function of just being human. So I think really it was for me to do the work of writing my path. Yeah. And of course correct.

And that was reaching out to Feeding America, who had a, you know, who had a church that I could go to and get fresh fruits and vegetables. Not just can, you know. Right. But the reason why I like feeding America is because they do, you know, so many of these urban areas are food deserts,

you have to go on the bus and go there and go over there to get actually fresh vegetables. It's really, really tough, you know. Easier to get frozen or canned or, but it's not always a healthiest thing for you and your family. And you want to raise healthy children, a sickly child is, you know, just so exhausting, disheartening, you know, just heartening, you know, nothing worse than not than having a child that's unwell, like, you know. So, so really it was about handling my own personal business, but also, you know, about letting people come and help me. you know, saying I need help. I need it. That's so hard for people to ask for help nowadays. It's so hard. It is. My children were great motivators for me, though. I also thought, who would I want

them to be in the world? And, yeah, so that's kind of how I got over it. But I also feel everyone has our own journey, Crystal. Yep. Part of why I love this podcast, because it is about keeping it positive. You know what I mean? You know. Laying and ditch. Only one at wave it up. You know what I mean?

That's right. Yes. You can't go no further. Right. So that's one of the things that I, you know, I genuinely believe. I've manifested some extraordinary things in my life when I had no choice but to put out my hate. And that's for help. That's terrible. Yeah. No, for sure. You talked about how the loss of your mom in 2016, how it gave you a new perspective on what it meant to be a mother. How did that

shift your perspective in that moment? Well, many things. I mean, towards the end of my mother's life, she, you know, let me know that she hadn't done everything she wanted to do. She had not. she had not, she had not been able to do everything she wanted to do. And she could feel the decline. You know, she could feel it was, you know, she was going to have to leave this world. And I just remember thinking, I don't, I don't want to, I don't want to be in that position. Yeah. I don't want my, you know, she would say like I had these children. I really wanted to be a good mother. I wanted to do. the right thing by them. And I understood that, pull. But I also saw that her choice made her feel small. And my mother was an enormous force of life. She was just this force of life.

What happens when your life force goes in the direction, not of your own life, right? Right. So your own journey, your own purpose, rather your purpose. You feel like your individual purpose is. So I learned from my mother to stay focused on what I needed to be very deliberate about what I needed to do. Speaking to this spiritual advisor that I have and, you know, because I still have sort of a deep conflict with that. Just maybe yesterday I was talking to her about it.

Day before yesterday, I was talking to her about it. She said, I don't want you to make the assumption that your mother isn't completing the things that she wanted to do in this life where she is now. you know her her purpose and her energy and her force her life force goes on and some of it goes on in you and that gave me great solace to think that maybe she didn't complete it here while she was with me but she's completely where she is now you know what I mean yeah oh well that's such a gift wow thank you for that advice you know yeah oh because that means we're never wasting time you know we're never losing time We're going to finish everything that we need to.

So, and my mother was an extraordinary gift of a parent. I mean, she really did put us first for so long in her life. So in pragmatic ways, but also in very purposeful, strategic ways to, both my parents were scientists. I don't know if I told us. No, really. They were both scientists, but such artists in their work as scientists. and educators and just so smart and intelligent.

So my mother very much gave me the representation of a woman who's not only beautiful, but extraordinarily intelligent. I understood I needed to be both of those things in her, watching her. So, yeah. Wow. Well, I know she is smiling down on you for sure. And I love that. Your spiritual guide told you that you are living out some of the things that she probably

wanted to do. So I'm glad that you for sure And that, yeah That is so beautiful I lost my mother at a very young age And I always wonder What she wanted to really do You know

And if I'm making her proud So I think that's every daughter's hope Yeah Yes for sure Yeah I think we're both sort of living Living that out right The last eight years

Since my mother died My career has you know shot up like crazy the last eight years. I know that has to be her life force in me and around me, right, and pushing me forward in many ways. So something that as a mother and daughter, we probably couldn't have done if she were still

here, that level of energy and support, you know, how it is. Others are sometimes mother and daughter sometimes fighting with each other. But so I'm gifted to have had the mother that I had. Yeah, absolutely. What are some things that you have sewn into your own daughter when it comes to doing everything that she wants to do, living fully, and I'm sure you're an example of that to her every single day, but what are some things that you tell her?

Well, my daughter's different. Crystal, she's so different from me. Really? I have to say this. Oh, my gosh. I would never have met anyone like Lena had I not born Lena into the world. Like I would never, I would never have met her because she would never want to mess around with me. You know what I mean?

She would never want to, I don't mess with her is what she would probably like. She just would never want to have anything to, what do I teach my daughter? What was the question again? Yeah, what are some things that you sold into your daughter when it comes to living her life fully? And I was saying that you probably are a great example for her in that every single day. Yeah. Yeah, the reason I brought that up is because she's so different. Yeah.

So what I give Lena has to be very specific. Got it. She doesn't hear everything I say. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I say, you know, wear this and do that, say, no, no, no. She'd be like, ma, I ain't like that. So I don't do that or whatever she says.

So I have to be very, very strategic about what I tell her. most of the things that I talk to Lena about are around confidence about how you and view your choices with authenticity creating a life that looks like yours and not like somebody else's oh yeah you know I tell her you want your life you don't want somebody else so you want the life that you is meant right for you and so um that's a that's uh i give my children a lot of agency a lot of power their opinions matter a lot to me now they don't have a lot of experience my daughter's only been in the world 14 years yeah but um i make sure that she knows she knows herself best you know i also make sure that she um

she loves herself you know you're going to be with Lena for the rest of your life I say to her make sure you like her make sure you take her

you know what I mean like that's your that's your boo that's your you know a boom like you need to you need to make sure that you're taking care of her and that you're having fun

because you're going to be with her for the rest of your life yes So all those things that, you know, are important. Absolutely. My daughter's a Virgo. She gets it. Her birthday hasn't passed yet or is it coming up?

It's next week. Next week. It's next week. Happy early birthday, Lena. She doesn't love that. Yeah. Absolutely. Now, you once said that motherhood is overreact.

What did you mean by that? Pregnancy, labor, delivery. All the things. Crazy. Crazy. It's a lot of pain, a lot of discomfort. A lot of physical. It's a gap.

I mean, I think that we as women are sold that, you know, we are sold this thing that being a mother is the penultimate experience for the, rather than a penultimate is the ultimate experience for a woman. maybe behind being a wife. Do you know what I mean? Yes. And I, I've had both experiences and I strongly disagree. There are women in the world who don't have children.

And I wouldn't say they're missing out. You know, I would say there are many areas where you can nurture and support and love and care in the same way that I do for my children. And the number one area that women can do it is to raise themselves up, is to support themselves, is to, you know, be their own mother and their own father in many ways, you know. So, yeah, that's what I meant by that. I mean, it is, it has been rewarding. Like, I did really need children to grow up. And I remember being a child, you know, a young girl wanting children. children.

Yeah. Even more than I wanted a husband. I wanted children. But, but, yeah, but I think that you know, you don't necessarily free, maybe you don't need to freeze your eggs. You know, maybe you don't need to, you know,

you know, stay with that guy because you really do want to have kids. And do you feel like that biological clock is ticking? Do you know what I mean? maybe you don't need to do that. Maybe there are other options, do you know? So physically having a child, I think, is very, very difficult. And raising children is, you know, next level.

But having said that, I had a very good friend of mine who's pregnant right now. And if she's listening to this, I want her to know, it's worth it. Keep going. She's 37 weeks along. And she's about to have her baby. And if she's listening to this, I want her to know you can do it, and it's going to be great as fun. It's a great time to celebrate it.

Right. That is funny. But you really just spoke to me because I am 42 and I just opened up about going to the fertility doctor. I haven't had any two. Yeah. And you're right. Sometimes we stay in relationships because we feel like our biological clock is ticking. There are times where we feel like we're missing out on something.

And society has put this great. emphasis on marriage and having children. And thank you, because even just in what you just said gave me some peace about where I am in my life and things are great, you know, and I don't have to put the added pressure on myself.

No, I don't think so. There's, you know, Jennifer has said this, Anniston has said this, you know, I am nurtured and am a mother to many children. None of them are, you know, necessarily my own, but obviously not her own, but, but she is

nurtured and supported and that is a kind of mother in the world and I mean there's also if you, there are so many children that need love and support. It is. If you're not able to biologically have a child

it's not as if you can't have a child in your life. And listen, I love a baby. I love a baby. Yeah, me too. And I like to give it back. Right. Right. And I love keep that baby

Every time I hear my kids My kids will If I hear a baby crying my kids My kids know already I'm going to get that crying baby away from my mother Because she hates a crying baby She cannot take it like my nerve Let me fix that baby

Okay I've got but I can take care of that baby Let me have it. It's very on the train Right If I'm in a restaurant I'm like mom are you okay I'm fine I'm just going to stay in my chair I'm not going to go get the baby. Not going to go get the baby.

Yeah. Yeah. Like I can make the baby stop crying. It's okay. Let me get the baby. That's my special power. I can do it. That is so funny.

Because my nephew, he was a crier. And I remember the first time they came to visit me when he was like not even one. He was just a couple of months old. And I was like, he can sleep with me. And that baby cried. I was like, why did I tell him he could sleep in here? but they were like okay I was like

but finally when he went to sleep it was just like oh he's so precious I'm like he's precious when he's quiet but you know he's so cute when he's being good yeah no that's true

yes exactly how has that journey been for you though as you're as you have lots of nieces and nephews and you're do you feel do you feel less pressure now at 42 than you felt maybe in your 30s or do you have you just resolved that

you are going to be on this journey in a singular kind of a way and navigate it as a woman just by just I'm just navigating this conversation as a woman. Yeah, no. That's so good, Karen. Honestly, I was so just focused on my career, focused on life and enjoying life as it was happening being present and then I started dating someone who really wants kids so now it's like oh okay so this is a thing you know and before I wasn't faced with that like kind of ultimatum you know and I think it was one of those things where as the conversation kept coming up I said let me just go see what's going on how many follicles I have and everything um so that how many follicles Yeah, all the things.

There was so much I just learned about my ovaries and uterus that I had no idea about. Yeah. You know, when you go do the consultation. All the work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a lot of work. And then you had that follow-up appointment where they're like, okay, so here's the reality. If you're going to do it, you got to do it now.

And I'm like, you better hurry up. You better run on out this office and do it right now. Do it right now. Let us know. I was like, oh, love. Lord. So I was like, let me just pray about it. And it's a long distance relationship. So after I prayed about it, I said, you know what, I'm not going to put the pressure on myself. If this is meant to be, it's going to be. And I'm going to continue to be present, continue to enjoy life. And yeah,

that's where I am with it. But it is a lot. And it can be daunting when you go get that follow-up meeting with the doctor. And they're like, all right, so this is your reality. What are you going to do? and you have 72 hours to figure it out not literally but literally yeah yeah but actually literally I love that first of all I love that we're talking about this because it's like such a

real conversation one had the pressure that the world puts on you to actually be a mother and be a life and then I'm sure that happens when you're actually in a relationship where you really want to live in that space I also think the other thing that happens

is that a relationship changes so much when a child interests, when you bring another person into it. So you really do want to be thoughtful, intentional. You know, it's going to change the entire dynamic of how you live with that person, how you see them. And my partner is also a long distance. He has two children. And I am, you know, going to be kind of a stepmom.

And I'm actually having to think about what kind of stepmom I want to be. That's what I mean. Yeah, it's like, okay, I didn't see myself going in this direction, but here we are. Yeah. Wow. That's amazing. You're going to be an incredible stepmom. I know you will.

I hope so. Yeah. No, you will. You will. How is long distance for you? Like, is it in the States long distance or like overseas long distance? For me, it's overseas. No.

He lives in New York and I live in L.A. But it's such a wide. It's just five and a half. I'm going to say, it's still a long way. It feels like another country. Basically. It's like another country. It really is.

Yeah. I mean, it's where the birds, deuses. I hate it. Like, I'm not a long distance. If I didn't love that man so much, it's critzy. Yeah. It is. And especially with that time change, like, you're up late and he's up early.

It's like, ooh. It's the worst. and he's he's got he's got this schedule where he has to be in the bed at a certain hour and I'm like you're like you know yeah yes yes and you know three hours it's interesting because he's three hours ahead of me so I'm always feeling like when I wake up I'm behind him like I'm trying to catch up yeah that's weird in a relationship and yeah um but you know gosh it it's actually works really well because I am so busy. It actually works out really well because I have such a busy life. Yes. So if you were around me all the time, I think we would get on each other's nerves. See, that's my problem.

Yes, yes. We would get on each other's nurse. Yeah, and when you're used to your space, it's just one of those things where you'd like your space. Yeah, for example, he was here with me. Sean, you know, Sean Harris is extraordinary. Amazing. We love him. He was here doing my hair, my makeup and hairstiles, Marcia Hamilton was here. And he just came in like, what is, what is this? You know, he loved it at first. He thought it was really cute. But now he's like, this is like, and I'm like, this is my life. This is real here. This is a real thing. But, you know, when he comes in, it's like, it's just completely taken over the entire. And I'm like, yeah. Yeah. This is what I do, you know. And that's. always you know yeah yeah i i know exactly what you mean yeah well i wish you both to your work and say yeah what is this yes yes yes yes yes yes but no it is it's great we're where

i'm madly in love with him i'm you know i'm not going anywhere he proposed and i know that's right now would you move karen i i i i he lives in new york i actually moved away from new york we met when I was about to move to L.A. I literally moved. He's coming there, which is a great gift. That works. I love that.

I love that for both of you. And I'm going to pray that nobody gets on anybody's nerves. Yeah. Well, good luck. I forget I think there's all the time. All right. Right. Exactly.

Cam, before we get out of here, I want to play a quick game with you. right um it's called um real rapid fire so i'm just going to ask you a question and you're going to give me the first thing that comes in your mind okay i got right okay perfect it says your favorite screenplay of all time casino oh that's a good one um favorite character you've played It's Dawn. Dawn Edwards. Yes.

Favorite playwright? Lynn Nautich, for sure. Mm. Yes. Favorite way to spend your day off when you do get a day off? With my children, with A-Day, in Cabo-San-Luccas. Oh, yeah.

Come on, Cabo-St. Lucas. And that's not part from you, so that's perfect. No, it's so close. Yes. I love that. Favorite Guilty Pleasure TV show. Zatima. That's my girl.

And then your favorite quote or mantra to live by? Oh, God. Choose you. I like that. Yes, that's what you tell your daughter. Choose you. Karen, thank you so much. you have season four of the morning show coming out.

Forever has been slated for season two. I'm so excited about that. I can't wait for both of them. Is there anything else we need to be abreast on or anything we need to put on our radar that you have coming up? Just now, September 17th, it's only on Apple TV Plus. You're going to see the morning show, and it's a great season. Please please be watching.

We're going to watch it. No, I'm so excited. You're a phenomenal at a show, so I cannot wait. Cannot wait. Thank you. Thank you, Crystal, for this. I love you so much. You are the best at being Crystal. I love it. Thank you. I love you, Karen. This is a delight. Way to start my day. I do apologize again for the technical difficulties. No worries. Thank you for your patience. And you are so gracious. Thank you. Okay. We'll talk to you. All right, love. Have a good one.

Thank you so much, Karen Pittman, for sharing her journey and specifically her perspective on motherhood with us. I took so much from this conversation that is going to resonate. with me and I hope it resonates with you too. In the meantime in between time, keep it positive, sweeties.