Keep it Positive, Sweetie - The Truth Isn't Always Pretty w/B. Simone
Episode Date: December 15, 2024B. Simone is an entrepreneur, actress, comedienne and social media sensation who isn't shy about telling her story the way she sees fit. Crystal and B. Simone sit down to discuss the importance of bei...ng transparent, the do's and don'ts of dating, what it takes to be a good friend and the keys to financial freedom.
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Coming up on Keep It Positive, sweetie. What got you to the point where you were
like, you know what B, I'm about to just put it all out there. I've always been
like that, but I think subconsciously it was also a protection because nobody
can say anything about me that I haven't already said about myself. You know she
was on Ozempic, you know she had an abortion. I already said it. It's like, yeah, this is me.
Having the facade and not being real,
that is like the biggest fear of mine.
Like somebody finding out I'm fake or phony or a lie,
that is like a fear.
Like, no, this is me, I am real.
This is what it positive sweetie. Hello, I'm Crystal Renee Hazlett and this is Keep It Positive, Sweetie, a safe space
to heal, laugh, grow and love.
And season six is underway to a great start.
We've got this amazing new set and we've had some incredible conversations so far.
I'm going to keep the momentum going with my guest for today, my sister, my friend,
B. Simone.
Now it only took six seasons to get her here,
but we're gonna have some good girl talk about any
and everything like we always do.
She does so many things well,
and she means so much to so many people, including me.
She's an actress, comedian, entrepreneur,
and a great friend.
I finally got her here, y'all.
I am so excited. My friend, my sister, B. Simone.
B!
Yeah!
Yeah!
Thank you, sis.
Thank you for pulling up.
And we finally got her here, guys.
Finally.
You know, get on the road with me.
We've been everywhere with me.
Everywhere.
On the couch and it made yourself comfortable.
I know, I had to.
I know y'all keep it classy and keep it positive, sweetie,
but I had to bring the Be Simone energy,
and I took the cover, took my shoes off,
and I'm here, sis.
We wouldn't have it any other way.
Thank you.
Thank you for having me.
Of course.
What you got going on?
I know.
Do you see this production?
Do you see the quality?
The quality.
It is so beautiful.
I'm so proud of you.
Thank you so much.
I'm glad to be here. It is the labor of love. I'm so proud of you. Thank you so much. Thank you. It is a labor of love.
I'm so excited about rebranding everything. Yeah, we're going up. Yeah, it's an upgrade. I'm super excited. I love it
I'm happy to have you here. Thank you
Y'all been trying to get me out here. I'm here
They're like she done been to LTT eight three times two times. Okay now try to invite me
Yeah, she invited me and I'm here.
Yes, thank you.
You're so cute.
Thank you.
Thank you.
But no, seriously, it is an honor to have you here today.
I'm excited.
We always have amazing conversations.
People have heard our stories, heard us talk about everything.
So the first thing I want to ask you today is give me one word
that describes the season that
you're in right now in your life.
One if you could describe it in one word.
I know it's so hard.
I was.
The first word it's two words resilience.
Obviously that's what I'm about.
Is it season like the LTTA?
I'm like try this again.
Never give up.
Press for resilience, but I was going to say progress.TA, I'm like, try this again, never give up, press for resilience,
but I was going to say progress. I feel like I've made progress, like with my career,
with starting over, with my relationship with God, with boundaries, I just feel like I'm in such a
new space and I'm such a different person than I was six months ago, a year ago, a few years ago, a couple months ago.
So I feel like I'm making progress.
I'm even back in the gym.
Like girl, cause I tell the truth now.
I was on that, oh, that was on that Zemp.
Ah!
That's my girl.
I was on, y'all know me.
I was on that Zemp.
Please, I gotta lose weight.
Take this shot.
All these diabetics need this medicine.
I got it.
Ah!
Okay? This is. I got it. Okay?
This is why I love you. I was on those Zimpy for like a year
and I lost 45 pounds girl, but it messed up my gut health.
So I talk about that, like the back end of it is like,
it's not healthy long-term, you know?
So I don't recommend it, but I was on it
and I wasn't like training, training super heavily on it
cause I was always nauseous and sick
and I didn't really need to
because I was looking good, right?
But now I'm back in the gym.
I'm back in the gym.
So I'm doing it, trying to be healthy,
doing it the healthy way and not like,
you know, supplements and all the things,
just taking my protein, weight training and doing cardio.
I'm back running.
So I feel like I've made progress.
The word is progress. I love that. You know another thing I love about you is you're so
transparent. Thank you. A lot of people wouldn't tell people that. Thank you. I love that about
you. You are so transparent about so many different parts of your life which is why I think you're so
relatable. Yeah. Why people just gravitate to you because they see themselves even if it's like a
certain part. Yeah. You let everybody see all of you and all the different colors of you.
Yeah. So it's like, oh, I can identify with that.
I can identify with that.
Yeah. I just love that about you.
I'm not as transparent.
Why do you think that is?
I think. I was always taught to that there was something about being a mystery.
Oh, I like that, too. Yeah, there's something about being a mystery.
And don't let everybody know everything you have going on. You know, I like that too. Yeah, there's something about being a mystery and don't let everybody know everything you have going on,
even how to tell people everything.
But in this world now where we're on social media
and we are on platforms like our shows that we have,
you have to be more open and transparent.
And I still find myself being selective,
but trying to be more open.
What got you to the point where you were like,
you know what B, I'm about to just put it all out there.
I've always been like that,
but I think subconsciously it was also a protection
because nobody can say anything about me
that I haven't already said about myself.
You know she was on Ozempic.
You know she had an abortion.
I already said it.
Like yeah, this is me.
You know, having the facade and not being real,
that is like the biggest fear of mine.
Like somebody finding out I'm fake or phony or a lie,
like that is like a fear.
Like no, this is me, I am real.
This is what comes with it.
If you know me, if you don't know me,
whoever is in my life is gonna get all of me.
So the truth, whatever that is,
the truth isn't always pretty.
You know what I mean?
So I'm willing to tell the truth even when it's ugly,
even when I've been through the dark times,
even when I've made horrible mistakes,
even when I might've been blacked out drunk in my past.
Or like I've talked about this publicly,
my abortion, I've had an abortion.
The truth ain't always pretty,
but I'd rather just be honest.
I'm not saying it's right.
I'm not saying all the choices I made were right,
but it was the truth.
It happened.
I can't erase my history.
It happened.
Whether I tell the truth or not, it still happened.
So I think vulnerability and transparency is a superpower.
And I'm kinda trying to get a little bit more like you
in certain areas to where you can still be raw and real
and all the way out there,
but it doesn't have to be a secret.
It's just some things can be private.
Yeah, there you go.
It's not that I'm, it's a secret.
I'm not hiding anything from you guys,
but some things are sacred and private.
Like I've thought about that recently with my love life like if I did get a boyfriend if I did
get serious and was like thinking oh this could be my husband would I share
him with the world like that's sacred would I I don't know I go through this
as well and I'm like okay I'm not gonna hide you like we're gonna go out but I
feel like putting somebody out on social media if you see it you see it yeah yeah yeah putting it out there. Yeah, I don't know if I would do that either and
For the most part the guys I've dated are okay with it
Oh cool, I haven't ran into the issue, but that is a thing you want to protect things
Yeah, sacred sacred
Yeah, and I feel you on that because when you open up that door for the audience, they feel like they have access now
So it's like when you put them on the internet,
but I don't mean you can have an opinion
on every little thing.
And to them it does.
And to them it does.
You shouldn't have put it out there
if you didn't want us to say nothing.
You shouldn't have shared it.
So when you put stuff out there,
it's giving an open invitation like,
y'all, all millions of y'all that follow us,
come on in to my relationship.
Come on in to my world.
So I don't know if I got in a relationship
if I would share him with the world.
I would protect it for as long as you can.
Yeah, okay.
Cause like I've talked about my dude on your podcast
but nobody knows who he is.
Yeah, yeah.
So, and I like it like that.
Hold on, my dude.
Hold on, can we just get a Kips Exclusive?
Jot that in.
Vario, jot that in.
Kips Exclusive.
Ba ba ba ba.
That was a question.
That was a lot of gibberish.
I'm laughing, you're like.
Don't make me take the cue cards and flip this.
My dude.
Yeah, you know, yeah, we're going to.
Looking good. Jesus.
Yes, he is working, honey.
Yes.
Oh my God.
I, my wife, my heart pounded.
I know.
I feel like I'm finally in a space where, you know, you like, you search and you
hope and pray for like the person that like understands even if they don't
understand this like they understand you yeah and they their care and love for you is like yeah i
see who you are yeah from the jump it's special so you know what i'm saying i'm just letting god
take this thing the one day at a time enjoying it yeah be be in the moment be where your feet are
don't like overthink like that, this is not as bad.
Yeah, I stopped doing that.
Yeah.
Enjoy what you have with this person.
And oh my gosh, I love that.
So what about you?
Are you ready for love?
Am I ready for love?
You know what, before I go to that,
can I ask you a question about him?
I don't, why you trying to jump off him?
Don't be trying to ask.
Yeah, I see what I did there. What about taking back control?
As Sheree says, drive the car.
So be.
I can't think of one little question.
What kind of work was he putting in?
Because.
You know what?
It's a long distance relationship.
He's overseas.
So him coming here, being very intentional
about getting to know me, listening.
I remember I was sitting outside one day reading my Bible.
We were doing the Proverbs Challenge at Change Church.
WISUP was what the challenge was called.
He was watching me outside reading my Bible, and he goes, let me go get some of this wisdom.
This is what he says to himself, not knowing that I was reading proverbs.
And he comes up and says, he's like, hey, what are you doing?
I was like, I was just reading proverbs,
trying to catch up because we're doing this
for the whole month.
He's like, do you mind if I read with you?
Oh my God.
Oh my God.
Baby.
I said, huh?
He's like, I'll read with you.
So we read like a chapter piece.
And like after each chapter,
we broke down how we interpreted it and
These are things you pray for right a woman who was after God's heart and like really seeking him
You want a partner that's doing the same just like that. Yeah, and um
He was in a different space. We'll probably talk about this once we get to that point talk about publicly
but he was in a space where
He was raised in the church,
raised as Christian, read the Bible, knows the Bible, knows the Word, but got away
from it. It's too many contradictions, but being around me, he's starting to watch
these change global. So he watches his church online. He watches online and every
Sunday he'll call me after church. It'll be four o'clock his time.
And then I'll watch it.
I'll go to church here and he'll call me
and we'll go over each other's notes.
And he's like, you know, I really loved it when he said this.
Come on, accent.
I'm like, ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Like he just reads the Bible to me everyday.
What did you love about it, darling?
Right.
Ha ha ha ha.
Yeah, but that was a part of it.
The really just wanting to be in my world and like be
a part of what I'm doing, you know, and loving.
He loves like that we can do things together.
He's like, this is something else we can do together.
And normally it was me being like, what can we do together?
Yeah, he's like really into this.
I was like, okay, this is dope.
And then even the time that we spend together, like when he would come here and visit me,
it was just beautiful like no stress
It just felt almost like home easy. Yeah, very easy
Yeah, and there were there's times where I'd pray about some I journal about him
I know I got this and then like literally there'd be something like hey, babe
I was thinking about this and it would be like what I prayed about to God like
Because I didn't want to like come off like needy or like I need you to do this
It's like I need to work on that. I was out. This is good. Did you read my journal?
But he was overseas I have I was like I literally just prayed about this Wow
He was like are you serious? I was like, yeah
And um the fact that he can be open and like doesn't something else I pray for a man that can communicate
Yeah, and like even point out his flaws yeah hey I need to work on this because I want to
be better for you. Accountability, emotional intelligence. Very. And you asked me
am I ready for love are you ready for love me? I think you pray for all these
things like you said but when it comes I pray that I can handle it and I don't
run back to the toxicity that I'm used to
Like oh you got a wash Sunday sermon, honey. What was it called? I won't go back. I
Won't go back. I won't go back because we go back to what we're comfortable. What you're comfortable with
I'm comfortable not being seen so I'm comfortable having guys chasing me or I'm comfortable not being a priority
So I know how to wait around and hope they text me
or I'm comfortable not being a priority. So I know how to wait around and hope they text me.
So when the good thing comes, it's like,
is he love bombing me?
Or you instantly are negative.
Like, is this just his, no, maybe he's a good person.
And this is how a healthy relationship should be.
So just hoping that I can handle it when it comes.
Cause I do believe it's gonna come.
It will come.
And I'm gonna tell you this,
you gotta be very intentional and specific
in what you want.
Detailed.
Because I literally write, I was like,
God, I want this, this, this, this, and this,
and God gave me exactly what I wanted.
And I'm like, but Lord, he ain't got this, this, this,
and this, he's like, what's important?
Ooh, wee.
What do you want?
Because I'm giving you what you asked for, you know?
And when I started to be intentional
about what I really wanted, and I was about to like,
I was thinking about going back to something else that no longer served me.
A relationship.
Yes, and then the next day I ran into him.
Yeah, and I was like, the guy-
Interrupted it.
He's like, what you're not allowed to do is do this.
Go back over there.
Yeah.
Bring it over here.
Right.
Like, get out of here.
I said one thing. Right, good, good don't need it. I said it on these things.
Like good.
Yeah, but you have to be very specific.
And also there was a time where I knew that God wasn't bringing the right person to me
because I couldn't handle it.
You weren't ready.
And I love that you even like I pray that I'm ready that I can handle it because I knew I wasn't ready.
You know, but now I know like this is the one thing that I need.
But God knows how that man needs to be built for me
Yeah, like in this season when I said the word is progress keep making progress
I have a relationship coach. She's out in LA. I haven't worked with her in a while, but um, she's like, okay
You write down all these things what type of and we talked about this
What type of woman does this man need like you want him to be disciplined? You want him to be in shape?
You you still eating doughnuts at 2 a.m of woman does this man need? Like you want him to be disciplined, you want him to be in shape,
you still eating donuts at 2 a.m.
Come on, shake, shake.
It's like, you want all these things,
you want him to be financially stable,
are you taking care of your finances?
Like yeah, you have money,
but is it gonna last you for the next two decades,
for the next three decades?
You got it now, B,
but are you being a good steward over your money?
Like me breaking all the bad habits so I You got it now, B, but are you being a good steward over your money? Like me breaking all the bad habits
so I can't attract that person.
I still have a lot of work to do.
Okay, you know what?
That's a good, when you know that you still have
a lot of work to do, just know that like whenever you find
that person, they're probably gonna have work to do as well.
But are you willing to work with them?
Work with them.
Yeah.
That's the difference, because a lot of people
get into relationships and they're not perfect. They're like completely ready,
but they feel like this is my person, you know, and then you see relationships that really work.
Yeah, and they need the one of them going. It was ready. Yeah, they end up making it work together
because it's like you don't have to work on something. But what is it? Yeah, I'm not. I'm
not. Okay, what's the nonic? I'm sorry. I'm like, give me good.
Okay, what's a non-negotiable? I'm sorry, I'm gonna ask you so many questions.
But like, give me goodbyes.
Rocks my life.
That's what I'm here for.
Oh, my sweeties.
My sweeties.
Darling B, that's what I'm,
that's what I'm here for.
Let me know what you do, darling.
What is a hard non-negotiable for you?
Like, non-negotiable we know means we can't negotiate.
If this happens, I literally look you in your eye,
if this happens, I will walk away,
no matter how much I love you,
no matter how much we've invested,
no matter what, this is a non-negotiable.
What would you say is a hard non-negotiable?
Maybe we haven't been married yet, right?
So we don't know what we would negotiate with
after marriage and kids and family.
But in the dating phase,
what is a hard non negotiable for you?
Like if this happens,
no matter what we have nothing to talk about.
You know what?
For me right now,
one of my first boundaries and
non negotiables is faith.
OK, because I I want to be the submissive
woman that can be led, but you can't leave me.
If you have no relationship with the
king and if you're not submitting to him,
you can wow wow like where are we going? me if you have no relationship with the king. And if you're not submitting to him. You can't.
Wow.
Wow.
Like, where are we going?
Where are we going?
Oh no, come on.
When they come back and get me when you know.
Hello, cause that's been the issue.
Where are we going?
I'm in the field.
Itchy, itchy out here.
Yeah, I don't belong here.
We in the mansion.
Come on, stop playing with me.
Come back and get me when you know where we going.
No, seriously, and that's been an issue where guys,
like they didn't understand why I didn't want to be
in a relationship and I'm like,
I can do this by myself.
If I don't feel like you can lead me,
then it's like, it's fine, I got it.
So I'd rather be alone and continue to work myself
with God versus be with somebody who can't lead me at all.
Cause it's frustrating for me.
That is like one of my main deal breakers, especially in this point of my life,
where I need that.
OK.
Yeah.
What about you?
Do you have deal breakers or boundaries?
I think faith for sure.
I'm not willing to compromise on religious beliefs.
Yeah.
For me.
I used to.
Yeah.
I can't do it now. I used to. Yeah.
I can't do it now.
I remember you talking about that.
I have different religious backgrounds in my family.
We all be in the group chat.
It's just hilarious in the group chat.
It's like, all right, y'all, God bless.
Yes, all praises due to Allah.
I'm like, Jesus Christ is king.
No, what?
And then my other cousin, well, the universe,
I'm like, we all on different pages
in this group chat, but whatever.
But I'm not willing to compromise on that
with a romantic partner.
Because long-term, you wanna get married,
you wanna have children, and you wanna ultimately,
like you said, trust.
If I truly believe that Jesus is the way,
the truth, and the life, and you don't believe that,
if I truly believe it, I just believe you're deceived.
So I can't be with somebody who I feel is deceived.
And just following a road of deception.
That and for me in the dating phase,
I dealt with this with my ex, God rest his soul.
Chris, I love you so much, he passed away.
Non-negotiable was cheating
and I talked about it publicly.
I'm like, if you, I don't know what I would do
if I was married 10 years with three kids.
And I don't know.
I don't know if that's something we could talk about,
but boyfriend and girlfriend early on,
no, that's a hard non-negotiable for me. If it happens, we have nothing to discuss.
I will walk away.
That's that's interesting to me because I had a friend who used to say,
you're single until you're married.
Yeah. Why do we put marriage stipulations on people we're not married to?
And I was like, so what's like marriage stipulations?
Like not cheat, like cheating, like vows.
You're like putting the sleeping with, not sleeping with other people.
That's like a marriage stipulation that you're putting on someone who hasn't made that vow to you.
It kind of changed my perspective on dating, which I don't, this is not a DT street.
I'm not saying you can cheat.
Okay, that is not that.
But she changed my perspective
where I stopped holding people to that standard
before they asked me to be their wife.
So you know what it is for me?
I think whatever we agree to.
So if you clearly tell me,
Oh yeah.
We're dating, we're in this together,
I'm not seeing other people, I'm trusting your word.
It's more of a word thing.
Like if I can't trust you now, why am I gonna be able to all of a sudden
turn the trust switch on when we walk down the aisle?
So I think whatever we agree to is what I expect.
If you're like, we're dating other people or whatever.
Yeah, so for me, if we agree it's just us,
then it's gonna have to be that.
It better be that.
It gotta be that, yeah.
Okay.
Okay, sweetie? Yeah, it's gonna have to be that. It better be that. It gotta be that, yeah. Okay. Okay, sweetie?
Yeah, it's about to go.
Something that you touched on earlier was finances.
Yeah.
And a question that I get asked often is,
would you date someone who doesn't make
as much money as you?
As a high earner, would you date someone
who doesn't make as much money as you?
I think I would if I could still,
I wouldn't want to 100% change my lifestyle.
Like, oh, okay, I can't get facials anymore,
or I can't get massage, I can't do all these things
because we can't afford it, right?
So as long as we can have the same lifestyle,
I would love to still travel and live
and invest in businesses.
And when you invest, you know you're gonna lose sometimes.
Do we have the money to take those risks?
I done invested in properties and certain tech things
that was like, ah, that didn't really work out.
Invest over here, you know, so he could make less than me
for sure, but I would love to keep up the same lifestyle,
if that makes sense.
No, it makes perfect sense.
It's funny because I've said the same thing,
because people always ask like, would you date someone Yeah yeah yeah I definitely would but I do I love
the things that I love and I've never been ashamed of that. Yeah. I'm always very
transparent about that like this is what I like to do. Yeah. And as long as I can
do it, Lord, I want to continue to do those things.
Crystal don't play. She be on a vineyard drinking wine eating cheese. I'm like Crystal, where you at?
In Paris with the president.
Call me back. I'm in Atlanta.
Come when you get back.
Bring me some cheese.
Yeah, I just feel like once you
know that comes with exposure.
Yes, you know sometimes for me
exposure inspires when you're
exposed. It's like I can't go back.
I can't Steve Harvey said that once you sit in first's like, I can't go back. I can't.
Steve Harvey said that once you sit in first class,
I don't want to go back to the row 20 in the middle seat.
I want that space.
I want to relax.
I want to work up there.
You can work.
It's more productive.
And you get to sit in your feminine and relax
and enjoy the moment and enjoy all the things that life
has for you
without worrying about, can I afford this?
Can I do this?
The stresses that come with that.
So.
You know what?
I've been broke before, so I know the stress.
Oh, oh yeah.
Same.
Yes, I've been broken.
It's a different type of stress.
I used to always say, I'd rather be rich in stress
than be broken stress.
Yes.
So I'm grateful.
And even a friend said, he's like,
it's a privilege to be able to do what you want to do, be able to take care of everything and then also be like oh I want
to go do this or do that or I want to invest in this and you can take the risk. That is a privilege
and a blessing to be able to do that and I don't take it for granted at all. When it comes to finances how are
you doing like with budgeting? Because we've talked about this. Yeah. That's a big thing when you get in relationships
trying to figure out, okay, like has money,
how are you with money?
You hear these things cause we've all,
not we've all, but me and you,
speak for me and you cause we've talked about finances,
hitting a certain tax bracket and a certain amount.
This is new in our walk with being a celebrity
or being financially stable and you know,
making this amount of money and having to budget it
and having accountants and people look over your stuff.
And I, for the first time,
I wasn't even like this when I was broke.
Girl, I would have like $50.
I'd be like, this $50 for the week, we going out.
Like, I'ma live my life.
It's gonna come back.
I'ma make it next week.
I've never been like fickle or like holding onto money
because I always believe it's gonna come back Yeah, but um, I show my million dollar journey on YouTube back in 2020. That was the year
I made my first million. I want it to be like, okay by the time I'm 30
I want to see it in my account. I want to see it liquid, right?
I want to see it liquid
Different to see them zeros like it's not assets, it's not a car, it's not,
like it's in the account, right?
That was in 2020.
After that, it took me 30 years to make my first million,
30 days to make my second.
So within 30 days after my birthday,
I was a multimillionaire.
Come on.
Quick.
Yes.
Maybe them zeros ain't in that account no more.
They say after the first million,
it's easy to get the next million.
It's just getting that first one.
And it's easier to spend too. It is. You see them zeros, you like that account no more. They say after the first million it's easy to get the next million. It's just getting that first one. And it's easier to spend too.
It is.
You see them zeros, you like, get the jet.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Come on, dinner on me.
You want to fly to Jamaica, baby.
That's me this summer.
I was like, what y'all want to do?
Want to be ballers?
Shot colors, girls.
Baby, let me be transparent again.
Them zeros ain't in that account no more.
That liquid ain't there no more.
Now do I have, I did buy my first home.
It's an asset.
I have invested in my businesses.
I'm launching the LTTA app, which is exclusive.
This is the first time I've ever said that.
Ah!
Bye bye.
So I'm investing, right?
So I still have, you know,
I'm still technically a millionaire, but with assets, right? But when still have, you know, I'm still technically a millionaire but with
assets, right? But when you start spending you realize how quick it can go.
And the million dollars is nothing. Nothing. People think that's like, oh my god, it's nothing.
It's nothing when you constantly are reinvesting. What? Them taxes. I said, oh I
owe y'all this much? Oh honey. But you remember when we used to get refund checks?
Yes. I used to get money. I got some money back this year. Yeah. I got a good account though.
That's good. Yeah. So yeah, to answer your question for the first time, I'm in a season where I'm being
more diligent with my money. I look back on all the people I gave money to,
didn't do nothing with it, they still in the same position.
Just so many things being Santa Claus and being like-
You are such a- you think you're a people pleaser?
I'm better.
You're better now? Okay.
I'm a- you know what? I'm not a people pleaser,
I'm a recovering people pleaser.
I am recovering. I mean AA.
There you go. Okayaser. I am recovering, I mean AA. I am, okay?
There you go, okay.
So I am recovering.
Okay.
I'm getting so much better at saying no
and I'm asking God first before I do things.
Smart, I'm telling you it's a thing.
You didn't ask, you didn't ask if you was supposed
to buy that person a house?
You were like, I got it, I got it, what you need, yeah, no.
Yeah. What?
I gotta tell you a story.
I've never shared this publicly.
I was downtown in, we were filming Wild N Out.
Yes.
Downtown in Atlanta, I see a lady, she has her five,
she's changing her baby's diaper on the ground.
She got five kids with her, right?
And I'm staying in this hotel.
We end up talking, going, going, long story short,
I put her and her kids in this hotel for the week.
Just, you know, put them in the hotel, boom, boom, boom.
Me, y'all, this is crazy.
This don't make no sense.
And I'm not advising anybody to do this.
A month later, you think I didn't have that lady at house?
Did that's who you are?
But it wasn't wise.
It wasn't wise.
And that's in the space that you were in, yeah.
Not even the space, I wasn't, she couldn't keep it up.
She was stressed. I walked in the house. It was flies and gnats and food.
Oh, I just came in the house and I started crying, you know, but we worked our way up to that.
You know, I had a realtor help me and I talked to her and I tried to get her housing and I tried to get her a job.
And we were working our way up to it. I just didn't buy a stranger
a house and it was an investment property so I was like if anything I
could sell it and it's still an investment for me right but I said all
that to say I didn't pray about that. I just saw somebody in need it was off
impulse like you can't be on the street with your five kids you know so I built
a relationship with her but she it don't matter what you do for people
if their mind doesn't change.
She still thought she was on the street,
even though she was in a house.
So it's more than just putting her in a house.
It's more than just putting her in a house.
It's giving her the resources to keep it up,
the resources to pay the rent,
the resources to mentally grow.
So she was in the house,
but her mind was still in the streets.
So helping people that God calls you to
in the way he calls you to do it,
not just impulsively giving.
So I'm learning that in this season
with my businesses too.
I'm getting better.
I be looking over everything.
I'm like, back in the day,
he's like, oh, that's five grand?
Oh, give it.
No.
Okay, break it down what I'm paying for.
Why is it five grand?
Well, this person is three grand.
Why are you five?
Let's break it down and talk about it
before I just swipe my card.
No, seriously, I'm doing the same thing.
I have a new accounting team
and I have Marquise every trip, business trip I go on.
Anytime I leave the house for a period of time
where I'm spending a lot of money, he does a spreadsheet of how much money
I'm spending. How much did we spend last week when I was going to New York?
$23,000. In a week? No, three days. Well what was y'all eating? No, that wasn't even eating. What was y'all
flying? What was y'all booking? What was y'all? There was airfare, hotels for people, trains for people.
I already know.
Per diem.
I already know. Day rates. Booking.
Yes, day rates, booking.
They gonna send you that invoice.
Oh, they gonna send me that.
The invoice!
I'm gonna pay it on time!
Yes!
That invoice gonna come. You be like, what am I paying for?
And people don't see that. They see all the things that happen.
They don't know what goes behind making everything work work and what I'm grateful for now is my team
who's like we're like I've been finding a place where they can like source out
the money yeah but like right now it comes out of my pocket until we get the
money yeah you know yeah and it wasn't always like that yeah it's it cost money
to make money so I was again this is investment we have a beer it's gonna
come back we have the vision But I have to be diligent.
I need to go through those line items
and see what's important and what's not important.
And see where you can cut back.
I've been cooking more.
I'm like, my accountant hit me.
He said, you spent $20,000 on food in a month.
I believe it.
Uber eating three times a day.
Not getting up.
If that ain't me.
I said, no, no, I said, you're looking, you talking about the year?
No, the month.
He said, he called me.
It can be like two, three hundred dollars a day.
And then you go out to eat,
you're picking up the tab for everybody.
So it adds.
Get out of here.
Get out.
Yes, it adds up.
And then you look up.
You got everybody's drinks, everybody's food.
We not eating no,
We at, TOW, for old Charlie's. Chili's. Yeah got everybody drinks, everybody food. We not eating no We at
Old Charlie's.
Old Charlie's.
Chili's.
Chili's.
We at Tao.
We at Nobu's.
Nobu's.
Mastro's.
And you know you wanna do it.
You wanna take care of
Cause you wanna expose everybody to that.
To everything.
You know but.
And I feel the burden like,
ooh I can't really, I got it over there.
I got it.
Cause I wanna go there.
So if I gotta go to Tao alone, I'ma go sit alone and wait't really, I got it over there. I got it, because I want to go there. So if I got to go to town alone,
I'm going to go sit alone and wait for my man to come.
Yes, yes.
I'm going to sit and have a date by myself
and just, I'm going to say take the platoon.
And he might sit right next to you.
And he coming.
Ha ha ha ha.
Where is he?
So yeah, 20 grand in a month on food.
I said, what am I eating?
By yourself, that's crazy.
And I like to eat now.
I do too. So I order six things just to bite. I'm the same way. I just want to bite everything. No, literally.
Remember we talked about that after church when we went out to eat after. Yeah. We went out to eat
on Easter and she was like, you want this? I was like, I want to try all of it. She's like, me too.
Yes. No, I am literally like that. All right, I ordered the whole menu. I want to try everything.
Even if I order like, I love La Colonial. Yeah. I order to the house. Yep. I want to try everything even if I order like I love La Colonial.
Yeah, I ordered to the house. Yeah, I get like three appetizers. I get a Tuna Tartar, the chicken dumplings. I get the salad. I get the shaking beef.
Do you understand what we're saying? This is nuts. It's like a $300 Uber Eats bill for one meal a day. One sitting. That's not including the breakfast I had. That's not including the smoothie.
No.
That's not including the post-workout.
What is that?
Bar.
What?
Literally you spending $300, $500 a day on food.
Yeah, it's insane.
I love it though.
See that's why I need a man that can keep up.
Cause I gotta eat, I'm not cutting that out.
Baby listen, Queen Latifah on Just Right, she goes, now ain't no salad eating shit. Me neither. I want all the food.
I want to taste everything so yeah I've been but I have been cooking more and
I'm like you know this is nice I actually feel lighter because you know
what's going in your food I feel healthier I can eat a lot of carbs at
home and I'm like this is what you cook You know what just cooked in so cutting back on where I can I've been getting my nails done less
I'm like, okay if I get pink at the at the bottom when they grow out you're gonna be able to tell I can last
A couple more weeks. I'm doing good
I'm getting longer hair style. So this hair style gonna last me. What's the afternoon? Yeah
ask me what's the uh after new year shit now you're pushing it
i'm like no shut up i'm gonna wash my braids
no this this gotta last this is you know these are the braids is 800
dollar hairstyle for the girl to come for 12 you know so if you're spending the
money yeah take care of it yeah and i used to be
you know purses on the floor, not take...
Why you buying the Louis bag?
Your closet is so organized and pristine.
I was like, girl, who did this closet?
But it shows how you take care of things, you know, and how you stood over it.
I was talking to a friend of mine about tiling and about making...
I said, my mom used to start off with shoes.
I'm like, I want a new pair of shoes.
She's like, I'm not giving you another pair of shoes
until you take care of the ones you have.
Wow.
We want this, we want this, we want that.
And God's like, but you not taking care of what I give you.
What you got?
So how can I trust that when I give you more,
you gonna blow through that too.
So making sure that I tied before, like PD talked about it.
He's like, y'all know how y'all get on the weekends.
Y'all wanna go out?
He was like, if you know how you are, go ahead and give God his hand. Just give it to him. So you can go do what you wanna do withey talked about it. He's like, just, y'all know how y'all get on the weekends. Y'all want to go out? He was like, if you know how you are,
go ahead and give God his hand.
Just give it to him.
So you can go do what you want to do
with the rest of it.
Yeah, yeah.
But the moment I really started taking that seriously,
I saw God continue to bless me more
because he knew I was gonna do the right thing.
I love that.
You know?
And it's like, it's exciting to give God his,
you know what I'm saying?
What belongs to him anyway.
It's his anyway. It is. It is anyway I'm saying? What belongs to him anyway. It's his anyway.
It is.
It's his anyway.
Yeah, but I too was like,
you girl, I would blow through money.
Just, it was like itching to hold in my pocket.
Like literally, I was like,
literally like, oh, we're in New York.
Let's go shopping.
Yeah.
I'm gonna just spend 20-bent.
What you want?
Get you something to eat.
What?
Oh yeah.
And then you don't wanna be, you know,
for me. You don't wanna do it
in front of people.
I know, I get it.
You don't wanna do it in front of people. You don't wanna feel like I'm, you know, for me. I know I get it. I don't want to do it in front of people.
You don't want to feel like I'm, you know, so yeah,
grab something or here, I got this for you.
Or it feels good to be able to bring your friends
up and do experiences like that.
It feels good.
But then you look up, all them niggas gone.
And my account is low and I'm sitting here
with this Louis bag and no friends.
Hello.
So we ain't doing that no more.
We're not.
You know, making smarter choices, smarter decisions. Yeah. I we ain't doing that no more. We're not. You know.
Making smarter choices,
smarter decisions.
Yeah.
I'm proud of you.
Thank you.
I really am.
I was telling people it was the strike
that really shifted my mindset
on where my money,
making all these millions of dollars every year.
What are you doing with it?
What are you doing with it?
What are you doing with it?
Yes, I can have all the designer clothes in the world,
but I can make Zara look like designer, honey.
And hey, don't sleep on Zara.
Don't sleep on me. Baby Steve Madden? Honey, girl, Steve Madden be look like designer honey. And hey, don't sleep on Zara. Don't sleep on, baby Steve Madden?
Honey, girl, Steve Madden be on Revolve now.
Is there a new collection?
Ma'am!
I bought two bags, boots, and some jewelry.
Come on.
These Steve Madden earrings right here
looking like Balenciaga, baby.
I done spent $500 on Steve Madden
and got the whole store.
No, I didn't know they had clothes.
I was on Revolve though, then I was like,
Steve Madden got clothes in there, cute. My friend was just over there, she was like, they got clothes now I was on Revolved the other day and I was like, Steve Matten got clothes in there, cute.
My friend was just over there,
she was like, they got clothes now, yeah.
Steve Matten Holladis, okay.
Holladis, sponsor, keep it sponsored, sweetie.
FTA, come on.
Come on, over, yes.
We can have some outfits, you know,
we love the fashion tips of the day.
We love it, yeah.
Yes, but that's good.
I love that, I love that.
We always talk about friendships.
Yes.
And I wanted to ask you something,
because this is always a question that I wanted to know,
that I ask some of my friends,
what are things that you look for in a friend?
And the second part is what makes you a good friend?
Because I didn't know what makes you a good friend,
but sometimes we don't understand who we are
and what we bring to the table as a friend.
For me, I can only say what makes me a good friend
by what I've been told.
I can't say I'm a good friend.
I need my friends.
To tell you.
They have, you can't, I'm a great friend.
Are your friends saying that?
Yeah.
You can't say, you not a friend, you know what I mean?
Are you?
Yeah, are you?
So, just I think from what I've been told,
like showing up for people, I just,
I really support my people.
I'm like, it's inspiring to me.
The Venas, you, Desi.
I look at y'all, when Vena had her show,
her one-woman show, I'm like, this is lit, bro.
I wanna produce this for you.
I would love to produce, I would love to help.
I was on the soundboard.
This is lit.
How can I help? I I'm very supportive you are it's support
Oh my god, you are is it inspires me when I walked in here. I was like yo
Like this is inspiring. What we doing next at LTTA, you know, like how can I it's not a competition thing
It's an inspiring thing
The way you carry yourself the the way you show up,
the way you're so graceful, but you're very assertive.
I'm like, I gotta work on that.
You can't let people walk all over, it's inspiring.
So I love supporting my friends.
I love making them feel loved.
I think I'm a great friend.
I do.
I'm loyal.
Baby, you could tell me you dated this nigga in second grade.
I will block him.
It ain't got nothing to do with me.
You introducing me to your nigga, I'm like,
hey, I'm looking on the floor.
That's all I need.
Hello, bye.
I don't need to be a noble nigga face.
I don't, all that.
All that, people be diddly-widdly.
You can't trust these girls, you know?
So I treat friendship the way I would want somebody
to treat me, just show up, you know?
In this season, friendship has changed for me.
I don't think I ever required a lot from my friends.
Wow, what does being required now?
Oh my God, I need to know you for me.
I need to know you're for me by your actions,
by the safe space you create for me.
I'm willing to go through the trenches with my friend,
but I'm willing to walk with them.
I'm not willing to drag them out the dark.
So if you got that dark cloud over you,
if you're in the darkness,
if you got that victim mindset,
I'll come check on you, but I'm gonna keep walking.
I'm not sitting in the dark with you.
And I did that a lot in my past
and it put the dark cloud on me.
And now I got anxiety and now I'm nervous
and now my stomach hurting and now I'm walking in rooms.
I can't be my full authentic self
because whatever was on you, now it's on me.
So I'm no longer willing to do that.
I'll help you and walk with you,
but I'm not gonna drag you.
That's good.
Yeah, so what I require is just loyalty, conversations.
If something bothers you, let's talk about it.
You know, we gotta have those conversations
and friendship too, so.
That's so good.
Yeah, you know, it's like you blowing up with,
you never told me.
Yeah.
I didn't know, I didn't know it was important to you
that I showed up for this soccer practice,
or whatever it is, like whatever is a big deal you never told me so you know you have to treat
each friend different because each friend requires different things.
Yeah, that's so true. Yeah, everybody needs something different. Everybody needs
something different so I truly believe I'm a great friend. I've gotten no
complaints. I have not one. And anytime, I talked about this on the Craze podcast, he was like, how do you take
accountability? I'm like, I'm such a people pleaser, that accountability is easy for me. Because when
people tell me there's a problem, I'm like, how do I fix it? I never like, I did that. I'm like, I'm so
sorry. It's almost over accountable. And I don't sit back and say, well, hold on. I didn't do that.
Or, you know, or hold on, let's talk about this.
So accountability is pretty easy for me,
but as far as friendships, I feel like I'm a great friend.
Thank you, friend.
You are too.
You are too.
You just show up and show up.
She's like, you wanna go to the Hawks game?
Yes, stop playing.
Right, right, right.
And I still, I still gotta come to this house.
Yes.
We be so busy, but we're gonna make it happen.
We're gonna make it happen.
We are.
But yeah, I feel like I'm a great friend and I'm super open to constructive criticism.
Whether it's in my relationship, and I'm sure, let's be real, I'm human.
I'm sure there's been moments where I might have gotten offended or might have been like not taken accountability, but for the most
part overall, I feel like I'm pretty easy to talk to, I fix it, I'm like let's
fix it, like I want to show up in the way you need me to show up. So I'm open to
constructive criticism even in friendships. I love that, I love that. That's so important and
it's also important to know that like sometimes to take in between like wait, did I do something wrong?
Yeah, because sometimes you can take things out of context
Yeah, and have you really have to know where you're coming from on certain things and people need different stuff in different seasons
Maybe like I have a friend who went through a divorce before her divorce. She didn't need as much as she needs now
Yeah, she's in a season of like I need my friend. I need my friend. I need my sister. I'm
trying to figure this out. I'm like you know there's different seasons when you go through a horrible
friend breakup I'm like in this season I need loyalty. Yeah. I need to know you my friend. Yes.
I didn't require as much at the beginning but once you go through stuff you need certain things in
certain seasons so just being vocal with that. I love that. I love that. We have, you and I both have talked about friends, family,
and forgiveness. And this summer we talked about something personal that I had gone through and
how I was navigating that forgiveness. Man. Yeah. As a woman where you are now in your walk with God,
As a woman where you are now in your walk with God, if you had to grade yourself A to an F,
what would you grade yourself on forgiving others?
I would say a B.
I'd say a B minus.
I would say a B.
Yeah.
It's so crazy.
Can I read you something?
Yeah. I just texted my sister yesterday. crazy. Can I read you something? Yeah.
I just texted my sister yesterday.
Wow, this is crazy you brought this up.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Where my sister, but not yesterday, today.
I was with my family yesterday.
And sometimes I feel like we run from family
because family is a trigger for our past.
So certain things trigger us.
Like we could choose our friends. You can't choose your family. So certain things trigger us like,
we could choose our friends, you can't choose your family.
So you always with your friends, well I chose them.
I didn't choose y'all.
And sometimes there's triggers over here with family.
But my sister was like, it's so good,
you're around the family more.
And they were so happy you were there.
I went to Columbus and that's my dad grew up there.
And we were there and I had a show.
And my uncle, my aunt, my dad's siblings, we were all together,
we went to eat and it was just a beautiful family moment.
Something that I'm appreciating the older I get
and the more healing I do.
So I was like, the more I heal, the less family is a trigger.
It used to trigger me being around family sometimes,
but that just come from unhealed wounds.
I'm glad I could bring everybody together.
I'm working through healing.
Therapy has helped me so much, even so-and-so.
I'm not gonna say their name publicly.
I'm not letting anybody control my emotions anymore.
I forgive her, and one day I'm gonna sit down
and talk to her and let her know she hurt me,
but I'm gonna let her know I forgive her.
I'm moving on with life, excuse me,
and I'm going to be happy.
No one in this world will control how I feel.
So the more you heal and you're like,
I just wanna be happy.
I don't wanna hold this.
It doesn't feel good.
You address it and you find the proper steps and tools
to move through it and move forward.
You don't have to forget, but it's no more anger.
You gotta let it go.
You gotta find the tools that help you do that.
Therapy, honesty, being real.
Like yes, I was angry.
Yes, I was jealous.
Yes, I was envious.
Yes, I was bitter.
Yes, this upset me.
Addressing those emotions, being honest
so you can move through them and not hold on to them.
Oh, that's good.
Yeah. That's so good.
One of the best books. Have you read The Untethered Soul? Yes, yes.
Carl Ulysses, my tailor, one of my tailors, he actually gave me that book a few
years ago to read. It's so good. Yeah. It shows you how to just let go. Be in the moment.
If we were really just in this moment, we would have no issues. No. Because I'm
just sitting here with you. I'm not thinking about what I'm gonna eat later.
I'm not thinking about where I gotta go. I'm just sitting here with you. I'm not thinking about what I'm gonna eat later.
I'm not thinking about where I gotta go.
I'm not thinking about my nap.
I'm not thinking about I'm tired.
I'm not thinking, I'm just here with Crystal.
Be where your feet are, be in the moment.
And when you do that, you can forgive and let go.
Yeah.
That's so good.
Now, how would you grade yourself on forgiving yourself?
Man.
Cause I know for me it's harder.
I'm harder on myself than I am on other people.
I can be like, okay, that's fine, whatever, move on.
But when it comes to me, I feel like I'm harder on myself
than I am on others.
A recent situation, about a year, year and a half ago,
I, it took me, I probably went from an F
to now a year and a half later, I'm at like a C, a B,
because you'd be like, why would you do that?
How could you be so stupid?
When you, you allowed that person to do that,
like you beat yourself up on what you allowed,
but you only did what you knew.
You can only do with the tools and the wisdom you have
in that season.
And that's, I thought I was, I was being the best version
of myself that I could be then.
So with forgiving myself, I'm much better now.
But I have been hard on myself.
And you gotta stop, you gotta be like,
you're bullying yourself.
Like you're being a bully.
You're being a bully to you.
You wouldn't say this to anybody else.
That was dumb.
I would never say that to you if you told me,
even if it was a dumb decision.
I wouldn't be like, Fran, that's dumb.
I would be like, why'd you do that it's okay though you know I would I
would comfort you and I would let you know it's gonna be okay so I think we
need to extend the same grace to ourselves absolutely yeah so I'm better
with forgiving myself I love that I just love our talks I know is it over don't
kick me off the go. I would never, I would never.
No, but seriously, this has been amazing conversation.
I love how we can just talk about anything.
Anything.
This is how we are in real life.
We be at the house, keep kin.
Do you hear me?
On the phone, keep kin.
You like, girl, I can't be telling you
what you should be texting me.
What I be saying?
Let me know when y'all.
You go, but yeah.
Girl, I ran when you texted me that.
I said, this girl is so stupid.
See, we not secret, see, we pride me.
Yeah, we ain't telling y'all everything.
Yeah, keep it cute, keep it positive.
Sweetie.
I love you. I love you more.
Love you so much. I am so proud of you, bro.
Thank you. Proud. Thank you. I'm proud of you.
Proud. You equal.
You talk about how I inspire you. You inspire me asoud. Thank you, I'm proud of you. Proud. You talk about how I inspire you.
You inspire me as well.
Thank you baby.
Like seriously, the way you push me.
And I remember when I was first doing this
and I was like, yeah, I'm gonna do a podcast.
And somebody was like, okay, yeah, that's good.
What's up?
You were like, let me know if you need camera people
or where to get equipment or if you need me to help you.
Like if you already had your own podcast,
I was like, this girl is like, you're just a unicorn. Yeah, thank you
I just love you. I love you, too. I'm so proud of this. I can I see it
I'm like literally seeing it you gonna be on this is gonna be a show
TV like daytime talk you I see it red carpets everything everything you've been manifesting. It's gonna happen. It's coming
I feel you already in it. You just got to keep walking towards it walking. It's already there. Yeah
Yeah, I feel it.
I feel like God is really moving and I'm just excited.
I'm telling you, when I saw this space,
I was in tears.
I was like, I lived,
Suri was in the middle of like going up,
okay, this is what we're doing.
I was just like, ehh.
I know, cause it's like, it's all coming together
and all the losses you took, even the people,
the opportunities, whatever doors were shut,
you realize why God allowed it to happen
for this very moment.
And I just have one request.
I just wanna ask you one thing.
Yes, love.
When you get married, please let me be the flower girl.
Ah!
Ah!
Crystal.
That's gonna be fun.
I just wanna.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
That's all I want. I. Yeah, you know everything already.
Yeah.
Is there anything that you have on the horizon that you want to share with us because we
want to support you in any way we can.
Yeah, so this is my first time sharing this.
I was going to go to Patreon, but I decided to start my own platform.
You are actually a part of it. I can't wait for them to see us on there.
But the LTTA app, just Community for Women where we share, I'm producing shows
for the app, extra content, daily motivation, daily devotionals, daily
affirmations, journaling, just a whole healing mentally, spiritually, physically.
We even got workouts on there. Everything. Yeah, so app for women.
You can go to letchytrythisagain.com,
put in your email and sign up for the newsletter.
I love it.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Y'all check her out.
Yes.
One of the reasons I love the conversations we have
on this show is they leave me so full and I learned so much
one of my biggest takeaways from today's talk is
Everything doesn't have to be talked about
Transparency is fine. But privacy is definitely important. Keep the things that are sacred to you close to your heart
Thank you guys so much for hanging out with me today.
You can follow me on all social media platforms that love Krista Renee, and you can also follow
our show at Keep It Positive, Sweetie.
If you want to write into our positive outcomes listener letter, you can send us an email
at keepitpositivesweetie at gmail.com.
In the meantime, in between time, y'all already know what to do.
Keep it positive, sweeties.
See you next time.
Love you guys.
Love you.