Kermode & Mayo’s Take - We Made Mark Kermode Watch Sex and the City 2 Again

Episode Date: August 1, 2024

It’s a bumper week for reviews, with Mark giving his thoughts on a raft of releases, including ‘Kensuke’s Kingdom’, Frank Cottrell-Boyce's adaptation of Michael Morpurgo’s beloved novel about a young boy swept overboard and stranded on a desert island with a mysterious stranger; ‘My Neighbour Totoro’, the classic Japanese animation about two sisters who move to the country to be near their ailing mother only to find themselves in an adventure with the wondrous forest spirits who live nearby; and Sam Raimi’s much-loved Spider-Man trilogy, which is back in cinemas this summer.   Simon reveals the results of the World Cup of Tom Hanks, along with the 1984 draw. Will Mark be able to predict the winners?   Plus, a special gift for all you Take devotees; Mark sits down to rewatch one of his absolute favourites, ‘Sex and the City 2’. You’re welcome! Mwahahaha!  Timecodes (relevant only for the Vanguard - who are also ad-free!):  Kensuke's Kingdom Review – 7:10  World Cup of Tom Hanks Draw – 18:02  My Neighbour Totoro Review – 27:03  Spider-Man Trilogy Review – 35:58   Sex and the City 2 Review – 47:21  World Cup of 1984 Draw – 59:36    You can contact the show by emailing [e-mail] or you can find us on social media, @KermodeandMayo   EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/take Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!  A Sony Music Entertainment production.     Find more great podcasts from Sony Music Entertainment at sonymusic.com/podcasts and follow us @sonypodcasts    To advertise on this show contact: [e-mail]  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hey Simon, I've been thinking about the great collaborations of cinema. Do go on. Well, John Ford and John Wayne, Francis McDormand and the Coen's, Hanks and Spielberg. NordVPN and Take listeners. Thank you, pardon? Oh, you know what I'm talking about. This is a subscription to NordVPN. It's essential if you want to access all your TV shows and films on streaming services from

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description box. Convinced Mark? It's like Eastwood and Leone all over again. So on with the show. I have a general theory, which is if above a certain age, men particularly shouldn't wear big headphones, over-ear headphones. Now, this obviously depends on who the person is and what the headphones are. So the redacted today, because I can see him, although he's taking his face off our screen just at the moment, was wearing the big headphones that everyone used to have in the seventies. And in fact, they are their 1972 Pioneer headphones. And respect to him, he's in the privacy of his own house. But I've seen people his age

wearing those kinds of headphones on public transport. I think you can do that up to a certain age and then after that you should be far more discreet. Okay. I have got a large pair of lovely blue noise-cancelling headphones that I wear that you've seen because I've had them at your house. I'm older than the redactor, I'm 61 and I am not going to not wear them just because you think it's a bad fashion statement

because here's the things they do. Firstly, they make listening to music wonderful. Secondly, they block out the noise of the world because they're canceling things. I mean, I spent hours on trains. I live in Cornwall. I spent a really long time on trains. So why can't I wear them? What's wrong with that? I think it's like you're wearing skinny jeans, Mark.

I don't wear skinny jeans. I know. I know. For the same reason, I think you should probably trade in your lovely headphones. No, lovely headphones. I know they are, but I'm wondering if something smaller might be more appropriate. Okay. Can I just remind you that those lovely headphones were a birthday present to me from the good lady Professor Herring Dawson. She listens to this podcast. So do you want to just- I've just changed my mind and realized that actually it's a, it's a, it's a fascist argument and should be, and it applies to everybody apart from you because you look cool in your rocking headphones. Hey, I've got a great idea by the way. Yeah, go on. I am looking, I'm going to try and,

as you mentioned your noise cancelling headphones, I am trying to devise news cancelling headphones where you can go, you put them on and you hear everything. You hear the conversations of people, you hear music, but all news is filtered out. What do you think? Yeah, well. But anyway, it's the summer holidays, so let's not concern ourselves with the news. Anyway, we're going to be here having a chat. And what are you going to be reviewing, by the way? You've taken a leaf out of Taylor Swift's book, I think. Will Barron Oh, I see. Because we're doing looking back

over this. It's a packed program. We've got reviews of Ken's Case Kingdom, the new animation, Sam Raimi's Spider-Man trilogy, which are back in cinemas, My Neighbor Totoro, which is also back in cinemas, and for some reason, I have been forced to rewatch Sex and the City 2. They did a poll, they asked people whether they wanted me to revisit Sex and the City 2 entourage. This was entirely the redactors idea. And because it's my job, I had no choice but to conform. So I have rewatched Sex and the City 2, for which I paid money on Amazon Prime. So, I feel unclean. Well, presumably you can claim that back from the company store.

Actually, that's a very good point. In the allocation of riches, how much was it? Like $9.95 or something? $3.49 on Prime. Yeah, here's the thing. It said, do you want to watch it in high definition? 349. Or standard definition?

Still 349. Oh. Could I watch it in a very small screen, black and white with no sound? Exactly. That would be 349. If only I understood how to pirate things, then that would make things so much easier. Okay, so all that has to come. Plus, we're going to be talking about the first of our summer World Cups.

This is the World Cup of Tom Hanks and the World Cup of 1984, the straight knockout tournaments everyone is talking about. As well as this and all the episodes ad free for the Vanguard. We've got some questions. Shmestjen's dropping tomorrow, which is Friday. And you get ad free episodes of Ben Baby Smith and the Mones, Shrink the Box. So if you're already a Vanguardista, as always, together, we salute you. Andy in Middleton, Wisconsin, marker mode. Okay. So that doesn't work because it's written down things. Marker, hyphen, mode, M-O-D-E, and then May, hyphen, O-W-E. It's not a competition, but on the topic of hearing your name spoken by strange voices, I may have Mark beat.

This is to do with the one I said I heard my name on an EVP tape, Electronic Voice Phenomenon tape at William P. Tablati's house. I don't even need to play a Toy Story title backwards to hear my name. At the one hour, 24 minutes and 44 seconds Mark of Toy Story 3. I should tell you that this email comes from Andy Stilp in Middleton, Wisconsin. Andy Stilp? Yeah. Toy Story 3. In the thick of the climax, Mrs. Potato Head bellows. Wait, I'll check. Andy's still packing. But he's almost done.

Okay, so Andy's still packing. But he's almost done. Okay, so Andy's still...packing. Packing. Andy says in the cinema back in 2010, I quite literally leapt out of my seat. That's my name! She didn't say my name per se, but she said my name, and she said my name to audiences worldwide to the tune of $1.1 billion in global box office. This begets the question, have either of you ever heard your name, not as God intended, but in a run of dialogue? Perhaps Simon may overtake the leader or let's trademark her mode of assembly. Let's trademark her mode of assembly.

I mean, let's trademark her mode of assembly. Oh, no, let's trademark her mode of assembly. Oh, that's very good. Yeah. Okay. You gotta say that's unlikely. I guess May and O is more likely to turn up than trademark her mode. Yeah. Anyway. Anyway, so Andy's still backing. Very excited. You have to take these small triumphs when they come along. You do. I do hope that Andy still does refer to himself as Andy Stillpacking. You would. You absolutely would. And that would be your email address, wouldn't it? Or your password to get into every single account. If you're trying to get into his bank account, his password is probably Andy Stillpacking. If that is your password, change

it immediately. Change it now. Add zero, one, and an exclamation mark. If you waited a little while before downloading this podcast, it's been in your inbox for a while, we're really sorry your bank account is empty. That's right. And the 349, which Mark has earned back through watching the black and white version of Sex and the City 2. You better forward that onto Andy's deal packing. That's what I think. Now last week on the program, we spoke to Frank Cottrell-Boyce, which is always a pleasure.

We talked about lots of things, but mainly he was on because he is the screenwriter for Ken Ska's Kingdom, a new animation based on a book by Michael Moore-Purgo, and Mark will do the review. Here's a reminder of some of the voice talent which is on offer. Skip his hat off. This is mum speaking now, okay? I know this is a bit of a readjustment, love, but when your dad and I lost our jobs, we wanted to make the best of things. We needed a fresh start.

All of us, together, exploring the world. Not quite all of us. We didn't want to bring Stella. Oh, love. We all miss Stella. But a boat is no place for a dog. You know that, sweetheart. I bet right now she's having the time of her life digging out Uncle Pete's garden.

Michael, look! Dolphins! See? It's not all boring chores. The voice of Sally Hawkins from an early section from Ken's Case Kingdom. The voice cast also includes Killian Murphy, Ken Watanabe and Rafe Cassidy. So as Simon said, this is adapted from a book by Michael Morpurgo. It's an animated adaptation directed by Neil Boyle and Kirk Henry with a script by the brilliant Frank Cockerill Boyce. Music also, you heard some of that there by Stuart Hancock. The story is a young boy ends up going to sea with his family on this boat. You heard all the stuff about, oh, I wish we could have brought the dog. Well, the dog was brought.

The dog is then, okay, fine. Well, now the dog's on the boat. We have to do something about that. Then, of course, there's a storm, there's dog water coincidence, boy swept overboard. Next thing wakes up on what appears to be a desert island, which he thinks is uninhabited, but it turns out it has another inhabitant, a Japanese man, Kensuke. Michael, who is the boy, and Kensenseke very slowly and very gradually become friends. Michael learns the way of the island of which Kenseke has become a kind of protector. He sees it as his mission to look after the wildlife, including the orangutans, on the island.

We learn stuff about his own family, what's happened to his family, why he's staying on the island. Together, these two characters who speak different languages form a communicative bond and learn to live in harmony with the island life and to protect the island wildlife against people who arrive attempting to capture the animals. Of course, Michael still longs for home. Now, in that absolutely brilliant interview that you did, Simon, with Frank Otterboy, he talked about how long a process this has been, including the fact that when he was originally approached, he said he didn't even think the book had been published by that point.

They were talking about doing it as a live action film. Yes. Because Frank talked about it. They went out and researched whether or not they could work with orangutans. He said that turned out to be quite difficult. Then when it became that it was going to be an animated project, he said that really opened the door for him. The first thing to say is that the animation is beautiful.

It's 2D animation that reminded me. Actually, there's a lot in this film that reminds me of The Red Turtle, which again is similarly a kind of, you know, a remote island story, which is done with a fairly minimum. I mean, in the case of The Red Turtle, there's almost no words at all. I think somebody shouts, hey, at one point. In the case of this, Frank talked quite a lot about how proud he was that there are sections of the movie that play pretty much like a silent movie. That the main communication between Michael and Kenseki is not verbal. It's to do with, you know, what did he say? Frank said, you know, heart speaks to heart, I think was the phrase he used, which is, you know, which is just,

I mean, you know, he said it's about gesture and generosity and that's the way that the communication works. So it's kind of, you know, it is nearly a silent film. The whole thing, when I compare something to Red Turtle, I mean, I love Red Turtle. I think Red Turtle is a sublime movie. And in the case of this, it has some of that charm. But really, again, Frank's whole thing, I had spoken to Frank some time before about this. I said, what do you think the story is about?

He said, well, on the one hand, it's a desert island story. We all like stories about desert island, in Robinson Crusoe and all that stuff. He said, but really it's about family. It is really about family. It's about the fact that Michael has lost his family and finds a sort of paternal bond with Kenseuke. Kenseuke himself has his own longings for his family. And there's the background of what happened at the end of the war going on in this. And his family now having become the family of the island.

Somehow this whole thing becomes this symphony of very understated, beautifully played emotions with some very exciting set pieces and some very eye-catching. The film is beautiful to look at. It's really beautiful to look at. When you did the interview, you said at the end of it, you know, look, go and see it in the cinema. Not least because there are some vistas in it that you want to see projected. You know, you want to bathe in that kind of magic, that golden hour that they have, you know, when he looks out from the island and looks out to see. The BBFC certificate is PG. it says mild threat, upsetting scenes, violence, injury

detail and language. But it then goes on to say, boy becomes stranded on a desert island. While intense scenes might upset very young children, the film's heartwarming celebration of nature and humanity offsets the more frightening moments. There are times when the BBFC's description of a movie hit the nail right on the head. That is one of them. That is not the description of a film censor. That is the description of a film critic. While intense scenes might upset very young children, the film's heartwarming celebration

of nature and humanity offsets the more frightening moments. I think I feel the same way as you did. I love the fact that Frank is quite down on exposition when you interviewed him. You hear this whole thing about in a Mission Impossible movie, it's like every 15 minutes you stop for a Zoom call for somebody to explain the plot. And as somebody's- Yes. In fact, the clip that we played with Sally Hawkins saying, you know, when we lost our

jobs and so on, that's it. That's the line where, which kind of sets the whole thing. I think we've played you the only bit of exposition in the whole film. It's true. It's true. And it's, you know, and also, you know, there's kind of those two names, Sally Hawkins and Killian Murphy. Yeah, they're there at the beginning of the film.

And then there's a shipwreck or then there's a swept overboard thing. I mean, I loved it. I'm a huge animation fan anyway. I think we've discussed before on the program how animation is not just for kids. You know, how animation isn't a genre, it's a format. And, you know, I think this is a film for children of all ages by which I include a 61-year-old man because it's touching and it is heartwarming, but it's also got danger and peril and adventure and excitement and friendship and it's really touching. It's done with, well, I mean, I know this sounds really, it's done with gentility and grace in a way that it kind of feels handmade, you know?

It feels like it was made by people who really cared whether or not they were getting this right. You loved it, right? Yeah, I thought it was all of those things which you've just said and And it would probably be worth watching again because I suspect there's some stuff that I missed. But essentially, you can take it on a number of different levels exactly as you explained that Frank had said to you about. It's a boy who gets tossed overboard, he wakes up on an island, and it's the story of what

happened to him. But the fact that it's about family and empathy and nature and coexistence and the fact that they communicate through art rather than language, as I think we said in the interview, they do speak to each other but never in the same language, apart from just to say what their names are, which makes it different from the book. Mason- Yes, because in the book, they learn each other's language, so they actually have conversations. I think Frank said in the book, he's a translator, so he knows some English, but he thought that was a bit of a cop.

So he didn't want to do that. Also the other main difference is that the dog in the book is called Stella Artois. And they obviously thought we can't advertise beer on this, so it's just Stella. But also you made a very interesting point in the interview with Frank, which is that you said that when he's first washed up and he says, help me in a kind of prayerful manner, and then Kenseke himself, there are certain indicators, there are certain things which if you wanted to read them, you could read it as a religious allegory.

But I think the reason that the film works in the same way Shawshank Redemption incidentally is, if you want to read it like that, it will work. But if you don't, it doesn't matter. I think Frank said, yes, that's what I do or something like that when I asked him whether that was the... But I do think it's only a very small moment, but I'm convinced that some directors would have the fade to black be a very, be a passing moment, a fleeting moment, but actually they hold it for about quite a long time.

For quite a long time. For quite a few seconds, I'm thinking, oh, okay, that's, we're holding it for a long time, which means this has ended rather badly. And maybe the next bit bit is anyway, he hasn't gone to heaven. But no, anyway, so fantastic. So Kensuke's Kingdom is the movie and if you go to see it, which we do both encourage, let us know what you thought. Correspondence at kobenameo.com. In a moment, the World Cup of Tom Hanks, the round of 16. Well now, it's a great summer of sport here, and Mark always

likes some sporting things going on in his life. So we've got to the World Cup of Tom Hanks. The round of 16 results are just in. This is a social media thing, Mark. This is going to be very exciting. This is knockout games, right? So two films play each other and one gets chosen. Yeah. And I'm here to tell you what the results are. Great. Okay. So it was the green light. Can I predict them? If you give me the thing, can I predict the result? Because I think

that'll be a bit of tension. Haven't you been sent the results? I haven't read it. I haven't read the results. I stayed away from them so that I'm hearing them for the first time from you. That's the whole point. The Green Mile played a league of their own. League of their own when? Green Mile 80%, League of their own 20%. Jeremy Burrows, I'm baffled. I did test the Green Mile over long boring and should be renamed dead mouse walking. Then it was big versus Sully.

Big. 77% to 23%. So big goes through. Great. Next it was you've got mail versus a man called Otto. You've got mail. Yes. 71% to 29%. Lee Kelly says, I really hope YGM goes through and Sleepless in Seattle doesn't. It's a ghastly, mawkish mess. We'll get to that, Lee.

People are getting angry about Tom Hanks movies. Mark says, I'm surprised by this. You've Got Mail has aged terribly. Hank's character is such a creep. It's really awful. It's weird. I did watch a bit of You've Got Mail just recently and Hank's character is an absolute creep. He really, really is creepy. Yeah.

In a way that you didn't think before. Well, because, you know, obviously, because there's two versions of it before, aren't there? They shop around the corner and then whatever the original versions is. Is it in the old summertime? I think it is. But yes, but I had forgotten just how creepy his owner of the book, I was on a plane and somebody else was watching it on their screen and I was over watching, which is a terrible thing, you watch over somebody's shoulder. Toy Story 3 played the terminal. Toy Story 3.

No, no, hang on. Toy Story 3, sorry. No, yes, Toy Story 3. Yes, Toy Story 3. 77% for Toy Story 3, 23% for the terminal, which made James Wolfe say, how are 23% of people putting the terminal above Toy Story 3? And it was Splash versus Bridge of Spies. Okay, if that's not Splash, I'm leaving. Bye. Bridge of Spies. No! Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. Bridge of Spies 58%, Splash 42%.

Floyd Dillon says, Splash is good apart from the problematic John Candy character who deliberately drops coins to look up women's skirts. That wouldn't get in anymore. And Fiona says, Yawn, please. Please Splash is out. Poor thing subverted the born sexy yesterday trope. Splash does not ick. I wonder if Splash is dated. Poor thing subverted the born sexy yesterday trope. Splash does not ick. I wonder if Splash is dated rather badly as well. I remember that John Candy

character and that's not good. I'm sorry. I think Splash is really funny. I'm on the bar. Freddy, you're on the bar. There's that thing when he goes, he goes, I'm going off to Cape Cod. Really? Have you got any money? Yeah. Can I have some? Splash is out already. Okay. Since it was beaten by Bridger Spies, I would say I would walk out now, but would it help? Very good. Toy Story 2 versus Elvis. Toy Story 2. 88% to 12%. Yes. James Rodriguez, we have a cartoonish performance from Hanks as a figure that sees

himself as a high ranking figure and his performance as Woody in Toy Story 2. Then it was the Burbs versus Road to Perdition. Oh, okay. Well, it should be the Burbs, but it's probably Road to Perdition. It is 65% to 35%. Niles says the Burbs is a classic, never felt this let down by a vote since Brexit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Burbs has got in it a clip from the still band at that point,

Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2, which is a good, yeah, these should have been the Burbs, but there we go. Michael Fawcett says, personally, this would have been my final for the Tom Hanks World Cup. Chris Douglas says, have to presume that two thirds of people voting here haven't seen the burbs. Yes, I think that's probably true because it definitely wasn't seen. Everybody went and see Road to Perdition, not least because the cinematography is so extraordinary and because Mendis was a hitmaker at that point. Then it's Sleepless in Seattle versus Catch Me If You Can. Catch Me If You Can.

64% to 34%. Yes. Ed, Freshwater, our old mate, Team Kip. No contest. Catch Me If You Can is a film, is a great film, brilliantly shot with a true story. Sleepless in Seattle is nauseating toilet. The Post then played Joe versus the Volcano. The Post.

74% to 26%. Correct. Apollo 13 played That Thing You Do. Well, I love That Thing You Do, but that is going to be Apollo 13. It is by 89% to 11%. Susan Love then says, my two favorites up against each other. Lee Kelly says, toughest choice so far. Ultimately, much as I like that thing you do, it's Apollo Bloomin' 13. Grace of my heart is the better Midnight is from about 1960s. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you for bringing that up.

Philadelphia played S saving Private Ryan. Oh, okay. Well, I imagine it will be saving Private Ryan. Correct. 73% to 27%. And he says a brutal tie, a final in the third round. Lucas says the magic of the cup. Anyway, that's the way the draw went, I'm afraid.

Castaway played, Mr. Banks. Can I just ask, is our football matches this fast and fun? Because I'm really enjoying this. Is this what it's like being a football fan? Yes, absolutely. Okay, castaway and saving Mr. Banks. Yes. This is getting tough now. Well, I would say saving Mr Mr Banks and I hope that the audience would go with us. But of course Wilson, you know, and also we were just talking not so long ago about Castaway

is the film in which Tom Hanks takes out his own tooth with the blade of a skating thing. So I'm going to go for Saving Mr Banks. No, Castaway 69%, Saving Mr Banks 31%. Mark says, oh, first one I've disagreed with, saving Mr. Banks is absolute perfection while cast away, though good is a glorified FedEx commercial. Yeah, because the thing in the end is no matter what happens, they will deliver your package. And CCMU says, if Emma Thompson loses to a volleyball, it will be a PL travesty. Very good.L. Travesty. Very good. Dragnet played Toy Story. Toy Story, obviously.

Yeah, 88% to 12%. And the Money Pit played Forrest Gump. Well, Forrest Gump. 77% to 23%. Kim says the clearly smarter answer is Forrest Gump, but not being smarter, mine is the Money Pit. And then Captain Phillips played Toy Story 4. Captain Phillips. Yes, 58% to 42%. God, this is getting tighter though, isn't it? Getting tighter. Harsh to match these two up at such an early stage. They deserved a quarterfinal at least.

And Kamal says, good riddance Toy Story 4. Simply one too many. And finally, the last round. A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood played Charlie Wilson's war. Oh, Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood because nobody saw Charlie Wilson's war. Yeah, 6040, that is A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood. I. Zimbr says Beautiful Day is a wonderful film and no, it's a fave of the dynamic duo, but Charlie Wilson's war is much more fun. Yeah, but nobody saw it.

This American Wife podcast says both good films and great hanks, but a beautiful day in the neighborhood doesn't work without him in that role. Charlie Wilson's war might have. Well, that's absolutely true. That's fair enough. Yeah, absolutely. Okay. So I only got one of those wrong.

Two, I think, because you, I think you, didn't you get? Oh, splash. No, that's right. Because splash I got wrong and I got wrong, saving Mr. Banks against cast away. Yeah, but that's pretty good really. Pretty good. Okay, so that's the way it is.

And all those films go forward and they'll play each other again on social media and we'll be back with the results. We have to wait. There's a whole other waiting period now. Yes, I know. Do you demand instant gratification? Yeah. Does this happen in sport as well? Do you have to wait? Yes.

Well, that's the first half of the game and now wait. That was the round of 16. So next time we get the round of eight and then we get the round of four and then we get the round of two and then we get the winner. The finals are going to be short, isn't it? It's going to be here's two titles, pick one, no it was the other one. We'll update you on the quarterfinals and semi-finals next week. That's how exciting this is. So we'll get to the laughter lift very shortly, but there's something else to review I believe before we get there.

Yes, also reissued and I have to say not something that I was ambivalent about the first time I saw it. My neighbor told us, which is the 1988 Studio Ghibli gem from Iyomi Ozaki, who by that point had made North Skilled Valley of the Wind, Lapita Castle in the Sky, would go on to make Kiki's Delivery Service, Princess Mononoke, Spirit in a White House Moving Castle, Ponyo, on to make Kiki's Delivery Service, Princess Mononoke, Spirited Away, Howl's Moving Castle, Ponyo, Boy in the Heron recently. So this is back on UK screens in cinemas in both subtitled and dubbed versions. How one feels about the Ghibli dubs is a difficult matter because they have been done very, very well. I know I've always got the thing about it.

It's lovely to see them in the original version, but the fact of the matter is that my kids, like so many kids, were brought up watching Ghibli films and the dubs are very good. That was great because they weren't at a point in which they were up to, or they're not interested probably in reading subtitles. So see it in whichever version you want. It's just great to have it back on the screen. So it was a huge award-winning hit in its native territory and then subsequently became this kind of international phenomenon.

The symbol of Totoro became sort of the symbol of Ghibli. If you see that in Amjadro, it's kind of one of those things as recognizable probably around the world as something like Mickey Mouse or any of the other kind of great animated characters. Story is that the title character is a giant spirit creature found in the hollow of a tree by a young girl who attempts to make sense of the roars that the character makes and therefore this is how she finds out what their name in inverted commas is. Here's a clip. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Totoro? Is that what your name is? Totoro? Yep, that's your name all right. So that's how Totoro goes. So have you seen this, Simon?

I don't believe I have, actually. Honestly, you should. Well, obviously you should watch all the? I don't believe I have, actually. Honestly, you should. Well, obviously you should watch all the Ghibli films and certainly all the Miyazaki's. As with most of the Miyazaki films, if you try and describe it in terms of plot, it not only does an injustice to the film, but it also kind of, the plot is never the point. It works better to describe it as a series of nostalgic childhood images which mix. There's this constant fascination with the interplay between nature and humanity

and nature and the modern world. There are all these, I mean, the things that which you will see, even if you haven't seen the film, you will have seen people with rucksacks that have got an image of Totoro or of a cat-shaped bus or somebody standing with an umbrella over this giant creature. These are all things that are from the film that almost passed into popular consciousness. I remember the first time I saw it, it wasn't in the cinema, I saw it at home because my daughter had seen Spirited Away and I couldn't make head nor tail of Spirited Away. My daughter really, really loved it and was really interested in watching other Ghibli stuff,

which at that point wasn't ubiquitous in the way that it is now. Then we went back and started going through the back catalog and look, actually some of the Ghibli stuff is quite tough. Some of it's quite grown up. Even Spirited Away, I think, has got things in it that seem very, very disturbing to an adult viewer, although actually, as it turns out, not so disturbing for a young viewer. But then we had this kind of collection of Ghibli titles, and they would just be on all the time. And then I started getting into Jai Sishy, who was the composer, who's Miyazaki's John Williams, always does these wonderfully relistable scores. But I've never seen it in cinema. I've never seen it on the big screen. I've only ever seen it on the small screen. So the idea that it's back out in UK cinemas is,

I can't imagine that there are many people listening to this show who haven't seen it or haven't seen a substantial other number of Miyazaki's and Ghibli films. But the idea of getting the chance to see it on a big screen is a real treat. As I said, if you see it in the dubbed version, you see it in the subtitled version, it doesn't really matter because in the case of Ghibli, those dubs have been done well generally. It's just lovely that it's back in cinemas. It's true of so many of the reissues, which is why they're doing it, is that a couple of generations have grown up just seeing the stuff on a small screen. Whether it be the Potters or the Star

Wars or whatever it is, you've grown up just watching it at home. Then to see it in all its projected glory is a wonderful thing. Well, we discovered when Saving Mr. Banks came out that a large number of our audience had only ever seen Mary Poppins on Home Viewing. And then when Mary Poppins 2 came out, I can't remember they did theatrically reissue Mary Poppins. If they didn't, it was a really missed opportunity. Because as you will remember, Mary Poppins was one of the first DVDs that we were given when DVD was a new thing. They said, we've got this thing called DVD. They gave us one of the discs they gave us was a flipper disc of Mary Poppins that stops

halfway through. Michael, stop straggling. It just suddenly stops and you have to get up and turn the flipper over and watch the other half of it. But I lived on watching that like at least twice a week for about four years and thinking I would love to see this back in the cinema. So it's great that Sajro is back in cinema. So it's the ads in a minute, Mark.

But first let's step with Gay Abandon into our fantastic laughter lift. The lift of laughter. The lift of laughter. The lift of laughter. Here we go. Hey Mark. Hey Simon. A bit of a disaster this week. Yeah, a bit of a disaster this week.

The good lady's pharmacist and I were having an argument. She said, I think we'd have less arguments if you weren't so pedantic all the time. I said, I think you mean have less arguments if you weren't so pedantic all the time. I said, I think you mean fewer. Fewer arguments. Sadly, she walked out again. This was Thursday of last week. I very quickly ran out of things to eat. I thought I'd cracked it on Friday when I was on the worldwide web, you know, and

I clicked on accept cookies. I got to Tuesday, they still hadn't arrived. Terrible service. I was panicked. Where are my cookies? I still don't know. Still no cookies have arrived. I had to sneak into Nextdoor's herb garden and forage. I'm living on borrowed time. I mean, that's...

Can I just say, I can't believe that in 2024, you're making a joke about cookies. It's just... I know. And borrowed time, which is an older joke, really. I suspect from 1825. Anyway, Mark, what's still to come? Well, still to come, a look at Sam Raimi's original Spider-Man trilogy, and I have been forced to revisit Sex and the City 2. Plus, it's the round of 16 draw for the World Cup of 1984. Well, as live as they say. This episode is brought to you by MUBI, a curated streaming service dedicated to elevating great

cinema. MUBI is the place to discover ambitious films by visionary filmmakers all carefully handpicked. Now Simon, you are a literary fellow. I am a doctor of letters because it was one of those Warwick University... Buy one, get one free. Yeah, put a hat on, wear a cape. Well you will be delighted to hear about the latest issue of Mooby's Notebook magazine. Notebook is a print-only magazine that's devoted to the art and culture of cinema. Created, prepared and published by Mooby comes out twice a year and a yearly

subscription includes a surprise just for Notebook subscribers and shipping is always free. Issue five, a do-it-yourself themed edition is available now with a beautiful cover design by How To's John Wilson try movie free for 30 days at movie.com slash Kermode and Mayo. That's M U B I dot com slash Kermode and Mayo for a whole month of great cinema for free. What you're hearing right now is a paid ad from our friends at Better Help Therapy. That you spend a lot of time on social media scrolling endlessly and comparing your life to others.

I've been guilty of that in the past. You see people getting married, first houses, new jobs or they're on amazing holidays and you think, well, what about me? But you know, comparison is the thief of joy. I use better help myself sometimes just to bring my life a bit of balance. I find it's a great way to start. If you're thinking about giving therapy a try, it's completely online, it's convenient, it's flexible, it's suited to your schedule. Just fill out a brief questionnaire and you get matched with a registered therapist and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. There's almost 5,000 of these guys in the UK already. So Better

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it out. His name is Hayden Birdsong. I'm assuming due to copyright laws, the MLB TV commentators can't reuse your own unique style of bleeping out rude words, so it resulted to just writing the word and saying it out loud. I attach a picture of the player with his name. So I'm just going to hold it up to you. Hey, Hayden to you. Hayden Birdsong. Hayden Birdsong. Excellent. It's a top name. Don't you think? I think it's a really good name.

Yeah. Previously known as Hayden Mellonfarmer. So Spider-Man, why are we talking about Spider-Man? This is very exciting. Okay. So in the summer of reissues, basically Spider-Man is being reissued in all its forms. So the Sam Raimi live action trilogy is being reissued one a week starting now over the next three weeks, followed by reissues of the amazing Spider-Man one and two, and then reissues of Homecoming, Far From Home, and No Way Home. So for the purpose of where we are now, let's just concentrate on the Rameys, okay? The first of which from 2002 is in cinemas this week. Kirsten Dunn's Willem Dafoe,

James Franco, Cliff Robertson, and donning the Spider-Man suit, Toby Maguire. Here is what, well, here's a classic moment. Whatever life holds in store for me, I will never forget these words. moment. I'm Spider-Man. Swingy, swingy, swingy, Spidey, Spidey, Spidey. Now look, I'm a huge Sam Raimi fan, have been ever since the days of the Evil Dead, and I do think there's something very funny about the fact that the Evil Dead came out in the UK, was caught by the BBFC for an 18th certificate because one of the BBFC examiners felt that they had been physically assaulted by it, then became one of the mainstays of the Video Nasties case was tried at Snaresbrook, was prosecuted under the Obscene Publications Act.

For ages and ages, you couldn't get it in an uncut version in the UK. Some years later, Sam Raimi is helming Spider-Man, which is this massive $800 million hit. The thing that the first Spider-Man movie is now probably best known for is the fact that it was the movie that ushered in the 12A certificate because it came out, you know, just the beginning of the summer and everyone, all these young viewers wanted to see it. And there's one particular scene in which the BBFC felt, no, it's not a PG, it's a 12. And people revolted, people from The peasants were revolting. Some individual councils overrode the BBFC's decision, which they were allowed to do because

actually the thing about running cinemas is that's in the hands of individual councils. That goes back to fire regulations. Then the BBFC introduced the 12A certificate and then Sony put the movie back out in cinemas with the 12A certificate. Do you remember all that happening? I do actually. I remember going to see it a couple of times, I think. I think we probably had a discussion when we were doing the show on Five Live, that people were taking kids like five and six years old to see a movie which was a 12a, which obviously they were okay to do. But you ended up thinking, if this kid has nightmares, it's your responsibility and it's your fault because there's

a reason that it says 12 at the beginning. do not use this as like a babysitter. Don't go and see this movie just because you want to see it and drag your kid along. I remember there was quite a lot of correspondence about that at the time. There was. It was one of those things in which the public said, we absolutely demand that we are able to take kids to see this film. Then the BBFC put in the 12A and we've talked about this many times before. They at one point talked about having a lower age limit on the 12A.

They just didn't imagine that anyone would take kids under the age of eight. And they decided it was too complicated to put in a lower age limit. And exactly as you said, and in fact, as they said in their report at the end of the second year of the 12A, what we hadn't expected was the babysitting service. The parents were using the 12A as an excuse to not get a babysitter. They would just bring kids with them. I remember I was in a cinema in which there was some kid watching King Kong, which he should never have been watching. Anyway, so I still think that there are... Did you like the first Spider-Man?

Yes, I think I did actually. Okay. Yes. Did you not think that there was a problem with the swingy stuff, that it did look very, very animated and without much heft? No, no. I just remember thinking it had been fun, you know, and Kirsten Dunst, who we have had on the program very recently, was excellent.

And indeed her good lady husband. Yes, Also excellent. Jesse Plemons doesn't go back quite so far in our affections. Okay. Well, my vote is for Spider-Man 2, which I think is the great Sam Raimi Spider-Man film. I think it draws on lots of sources. There's a bit of Spider-Man and more in there. The whole thing is Peter Parker, Toby Maguire, he's still trying to complete his studies. There's a bit of Spider-Man and more in there. The whole thing is Peter Parker, Toby Maguire, he's still trying to complete his studies. He's working as a pizza delivery boy. He's selling snaps at the Daily Bugle. What he wants to do is to not be Spider-Man. He wants to get on with being a young kid in love. Then there's all this stuff about

how the fact that he's Spider-Man-ness is actually a kind of analogy for adolescence. Then we get Alfred Molina's Otto Octavius, who's got these tentacles. I still think it's one of the best lines in a Spider-Man movie, where he says he's called Octavius and he ends up with eight limbs. What are the chances? Which is just fantastic. The thing about that movie is there are scenes in that film that wouldn't have looked out of place in Tetsuo the Iron Man. Some of the transformation scenes are really

kind of scrungy. I think it owes a debt to Sam Raimi's Dark Man from 1990, which kind of laid the thematic seeds of it. I think they'd really sorted out the visuals and I think they had managed to get the swingy Spider-Man stuff with a degree of heft. I think the performances are good, it's funny, it's got some great moments in it. I mean, there are things that you could take issue with, but I was watching it thinking, you know, this reminds me of The Matrix, and this reminds me of Guillermo del Toro's Kronos, and it hits all the marks, which is why it is such a disappointment when we get to Spider-Man 3, which Remy himself described some years after it was finished as awful.

I know that it's since been reassessed. There's a whole bunch of stuff on the internet now saying, well, Spider-Man 3 was never as bad as everybody said it was. It was actually a better movie. But it is a movie in which the production problems are writ large all over it. There are too many strands, there's too many villains, all the Venom stuff. And it just looks like a film being made by a committee of people saying, oh, we've got to have this, we've got to have that, we've got to do this, we've got to do that. So as far as I'm concerned, of the Remy trilogy, the best one is two, the second best is one,

and three is a crushing disappointment. That was why by the time we got to The Amazing Spider-Man and they were rebooting, which is very fast to reboot what's already to some extent a reboot anyway, it's okay, yes, but we have to start again because after three things, the wheels had really come off. But Spider-Man 2, which opens in UK cinemas next Friday, is cracking. That is a really, really good film. It's amazing just how dark and scrungy it is for a film that plays to audiences of all

ages. Correspondents at comitabmay.com, once you've seen them, let us know. And still to come. Sex and the City 2, for reasons which fail me, by popular demand. Bumble knows it's hard to start conversations. Hey. No, too basic. Hi there.

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How about a 4 p.m. late checkout? Just need a nice place to settle in? Enjoy your room upgrade. Wherever you go, we'll go together. That's the powerful backing of American Express. Visit amex.ca slash ymx. Benefits vary by card. Terms apply. An email from Jamie drops into our inbox, correspondence at coenema.com. Jamie, hi Jamie and Georgie. Hiya Georgie.

Hiya Georgie. Long time listener, first time email typer. On a recent trip to Scotland, I took out my list of things to watch and Glasgow's gothic architecture gave me a taste for something nostalgic. There on my list, thanks to you both, was the amazing Mr. Blunden. As a late 1970s baby myself, this little marvel was highly nostalgic for me and I very much enjoyed it. Mutton chops and all. The first half is interesting, though not stand out, but the second half was an especially good balance of humor and real tension and ghosts are always a plus. I recommend it very much to other seventies babies. Though maybe some modern kids might find it slow in early places, it

has heart and charm. I finished up looking up the actors and what else they ever did and what stood out with the two main child actors. Gary Miller seemingly lost interest in acting after Mr. Blunden. Maybe it wasn't a big enough success at the time. But Lynn Frederick's story is sadder. However, the sadness this far past her death made me somehow feel a melancholy joy for the part that she played in this ingenious little film, giving her a longer imprint on the world and hoping Gary trod a happier path. So Lynn Frederick's, of course, she married Peter Sellers, didn't she? Is that right? I had completely forgotten that.

And then Peter Sellers, this is just a curse. As I remember it, she had to nurse him when Peter Sellers wasn't well. In fact, he insisted on that. And then there was some fuss and bother about the will and then she married David Frost briefly and so on. Anyway, and she died a recluse in America. Anyway, Jamie says, I shall end to say let's raise a glass for all the actors. It doesn't seem a happy road that they trod, but they do a wonderful job in this movie and I can't imagine us being without their skills. So that's good. Directed by Lionel Jeffreys.

Lionel Jeffreys. And of course, one of the things that's really lovely about it is there was a remake of it a couple of years ago made by Mark Gatiss, who absolutely loves Amazing Mr. Blundon in the same way that I do and Kim Newman does. It was really funny to discover because I started talking about it on our program some years ago and then people said, yeah, no, I love that film. I love that film. And then the score came out on CD and it was great. But in the remake, there's some people who were involved in the original production. Me and Kim Newman have a tiny cameo in it. And we're credited at the end as Father Carras and Father Merrin,

and we're literally two people walking out of the church. It's nice. It's like a back shot of me and Kim walking out of the church. But we were so pleased about having anything to do with the legacy of that film. One of the things that they've done with the remake of Amazing Mr. Blunders, which of course is based on a book by Antonio Barba called The Ghosts.

Is that people have gone back and watched the original and gone, this film is, and of course everyone remembers the railway children for Lionel Jeffries, but I think Blundon is the masterpiece. It's so well made and it's so moving. It's so profoundly moving. I love it. I just love it. Correspondence at KevinOMoe.com.

So next on my running order menu here, it says, and I haven't seen this for a while, Sex in the City 2. Now this is a kind of, we're reclaiming, this is where the Taylor Swift thing comes in because you're retooling an old hit. Well that makes it sound easier than what I did. Simon Poole, who's evil, put a thing on whatever that site's called now that Elon Musk runs saying, would you like him to rewatch Entourage or Sex and the City 2? And then he just sent me a message saying you have to watch Sex and the City 2 again. And I said, why is it back out? And he went, no,

me a message saying you have to watch Sex and the City 2 again. And I said, why is it back out? And he went, no, it's a thing where you revisit something that you had a very profound reaction to the first time. Maybe, because maybe you were wrong. You know? Yes. Okay. So I haven't seen Sex and the City 2 since the first time I saw it.

And if you were, well, of course you may well remember, I said at the beginning of my original review, well, I'm not going to rant about this. And then I, and then I, I kind I got fired up and then I ended up singing the Internationale in the middle of the review and it became a thing. I haven't gone back and seen the film since then. What I have done is lived the rest of the years since then with people saying, oh, that Sex and the City 2 review was so funny, I had to go and see the film.

Whenever Sex and the City 2 is on television, people would message me, go, I'll watch it, Sex and the City 2 is on television, people would message me, go, I'll watch Sex and the City 2. So I think that in the end, I probably ended up benefiting the box office. So it was with a heavy heart that I agreed to go back to this because this is 2010. So this is like 14 years ago that it first came out. But I watched the whole thing from beginning to end.

And I have the receipt to prove it. What I said when it first came out was that basically it was hell-bent on reinforcing the worst possible gender stereotyping. It's about overprivileged Americans screaming imperialist drag queens. It's the same length as 2001 pretty much. It's a story about rich Americans going to Abu Dhabi where they express their right to buy shoes. I got really off my bike about it. I watched it again. The first time I was quite outraged. I thought it was really, really morally repugnant. The second time around, the first thing I was quite outraged, I thought it was really, really morally repugnant. The second time around, the first thing I noticed was how badly made it is. When you're beyond the point of outrage, you go, this is just actually very, very badly

made. Now, I should say for a start, I haven't seen, still haven't seen the Sex and the City television series and I am told that it is very good and I have no reason to disbelieve that. Watching this, for example, people like Cynthia Nixon, who is this key part of the Sex and the City thing, she's brilliant in that Terrence Davis film that she made, which is absolutely marvelous. She is quite terrible here. She gets one of the lines about, she says, I've tricked my body into thinking it's thinner. Spanx. The fact that she has to say that line is you think, do you feel as terrible saying that line as I feel listening to it?

At the very beginning, there's the big gay wedding, and the big gay wedding is worse than I remember it being. I mean, Liza Minnelli is in the film, and she isn't funny, which is amazing because I love Liza Minnelli. All the way and she isn't funny, which is amazing because I love Liza Minnelli. And all the way through, they keep on invoking old black and white movies like it happened one night, which just kind of makes everything seem worse. But the film starts with the words, once upon a time, a long time ago, there was an island, some Dutch, some Indian, some beads. And in a way, and I had kind of missed this the first time around, that is the film.

That is that view of America, some Dutch, some Indian, some Bede. That is it. So we start off with the big gay wedding scene, which goes on for ages. And weirdly enough, I watched this after having just watched the recut of Caligula, which I'll talk about in another week. The decadence on display in the big gay wedding sequence at the beginning of Sex and the City 2 is much worse than anything in Caligula, which was described at the time by critics as a moral holocaust. You go, yeah, well, you haven't seen Sex and the City 2. Don't they swing naked from chandeliers and so on?

In which film? In Caligula. And worse, and yet the decadence on display is nothing compared to the dripping extravagance that's in Sex and the City. So anyway, so then what happens is, I was aligned to deliver really badly. Our heroine, she's living with Mr. Big, but then she realizes that he wants some time on his own, so she's worried about that. Then they get offered a free trip to Abu Dhabi, and one of them is having a difficult time because she's got too much responsibility, and they've got a nanny. This is the thing, and again, I've completely forgotten this. There is Charlotte's Irish nanny,

and the joke about Charlotte's Irish nanny is that she has big bosoms and she doesn't wear a bra. This joke goes on for quite a long time. There is a carry-on camping scene in which Charlotte has to look at the nanny who is jumping up and down with the kids and her bosoms are bouncing around. It's literally like a cartwheeling breast scene out of carry-on camping. You keep expecting Barbara Windsor to walk on. You think, I had forgotten this scene was even in the film. Then there's the thing about, she leaves her own apartment, so she goes, there's a downsized apartment, which is bigger than the house I live in, which is amazing because I live in a church. Then there's this other apartment that she's completely forgotten about. She gives big 1968 vintage Rolex watch and he gives her a television

screen and this is grounds for splitting up and one of them going to the other side of the world. So they go to Abu Dhabi and there is a bit where they're on the plane and somebody actually has to say out loud, Abu Dhabi do. Okay, literally Abu Dhabi do. And so they're on the plane. We're now an hour in and I wrote down, I haven't laughed yet. They get to Abu Dhabi, they quote the Wizard of Oz. Very, very bad move. Ahmed Jalili turns up. I had completely forgotten that Ahmed Jalili was in it. And Ahmed Jalili has to deliver the lines. There's a sporting team and Kim Cattrall says, oh, you know, are they here with their balls? And he says, yes, they have many, many balls. And then he goes away and he's away for about an hour and then he comes back.

Then they start making jokes about kneecaps, about facial coverings, about they certainly cut back on the Botox bill. Then there's a long joke about somebody wearing a veil eating fries under the veil, which is meant to be hilarious. Then there's the bit when Sarah Jessica Parker's character, who's been given her own butler, discovers that her own butler only sees his wife once every three months because she lives in India and he can only afford to go home once every three months. And as I noticed this the first time, she doesn't see this as like, oh, this is a terrible thing about how wealthy I am.

She says, oh, yeah, well, we have the same problem. I suddenly realized that there's all kinds of marriages and he has the same problem as I do. Big is apart from me for two days a week. He's apart from his wife for three months of the year at a time. Then they make jokes about bikinis. Then there is the worst line in the film, well actually one of the worst lines, which is, I'm going to turn this into French and because they have to make an intervention, I'm going to turn

this into French and into an inter-function. Then the women all come over a sand dune. From where? From where? And then this happens. Who's her long distance provider? Hello, Harry? What have you been doing? I woke you up. Harry, wait. You're going in and out. Oh, can you hear me now? Harry? Miranda, I'm back!

So she's on a camel. She's fallen off a camel. Right. She pulls up her trousers and one of the other girls says to her, oh, you have an actual camel toe. You have an actual what? Camel toe. Okay.

You remember when I looked up WAP? And then another one says she has a sand wedge. And then a hot man comes over a cliff over the sand dune on a car, and then Kim Cattrall delivers the line, Lawrence of Mylabia. Then it turns out his name is Richard Spurt. So she says, so your name is Dick Spurt. Honestly, in being outraged by how pernicious the politics of the film was,

I had completely forgotten just how bad the writing is, and just how bad the delivery of the lines is. I was shocked by how crass. Because I thought, okay, look, you took objection to this, Mark, because this is the gang of four part of you getting annoyed. But no, it's really, really badly made, really, really badly written, really, really badly played. She goes on a date

with Aidan, they have a snog. Then two people have a conversation in a private bar about how hard it is to be a mother in a private bar wearing dresses that are only in that scene. Then Samantha gets arrested for having sex on the beach and ends up throwing condoms at everyone. Then about five seconds later, there's a scene in which Sarah Jessica Parker stops a taxi by showing her leg, like literally three minutes after her pal got arrested on it. Were they not in the same... Were there five different sets of writers writing this, none of whom saw what the other person had do? Then they get thrown out of the hotel that they'd been flown over on the Sheikh's private plane, and they're in this private hotel, but then they

get thrown out. But then they're going back on the private plane. How? The Sheikh has just disowned them. There is, however, there's one gag in it that I laughed at. Do you want to hear the one gag that I laughed at? It's too big a word. It was one gag that raised a smile, which was when I was told my husband was going to cheat with the nanny, my first thought was, I can't lose the nanny. Okay. Well, that's a reasonable observation. That's it. Yes.

And then at the very end, I just looked up camel toe. Yeah, fine. And this is in the movie. So I mean, the first time I saw it, I don't even think I noticed that gag. I think it just went by because I was still reeling from Lawrence of Mylabia. And then at the very end, when all this, it's so badly made, it's so badly made, quite apart from how angry I was about it politically. And then they ruin Cyndi Lauper's True Colors, which is a song that I used to listen

to at the same time that I was listening to the Gang of Four doing entertainment. And it was like, and then I got up and sang the Internationale and then deleted it from my computer. And I'm going to claim back the money from Simon Paul. Would you say you spent £3.95 better elsewhere? You know those sweet shops? For £3.49, you could have got like a bag of white mice. Giant Twix, you could have probably done for that. A never-ending gobstop. Honestly, I was right the first time. I was right the first time.

Are you less angry? Yeah, I mean, I'm not. I mean, it was just, it was really depressing. It was really, really depressing, realizing how badly made it was. Because I don't think I said that the first time. The first time I was just so enraged by everything about it. It's gender politics, it's sexual politics, it's national politics, it's politics politics. It's one bit when

they're sitting around in this orgy of wealth and one of them says, I need to go somewhere rich. You go, you are somewhere rich. It's entourage with girls. It's horrible. Are you going to have to watch entourage? No, no, no, no. It was either or. I'm not doing both of them. There's entourage with girls. It's horrible. You're going to have to watch entourage. No, no, no, no. It was either or. I'm not doing both of them. There's only a certain amount of poise in your system can take. Okay. Well, let's see what happens next. You never know what there is access up to. We're going to do another thing here because you know George Orwell predicted in his dystopian George Orwell predicted in his dystopian fiction classic 1949 novel, A Dark Future, where tech is used to control the masses.

He depicted a world in which facial recognition, auto transcription, and music were made by AI. Well, none of that came true. 1984 was brilliant, and the redactor has had his children print out and cut out all the 32 finalists. These are the films of 1984, which we're going to do. This is the round of 16 draw. The draw is completely unseeded, so you can expect some tough draws.

The draw takes place now. That's what happens. It says here, Simon Poole will hold up each film to camera. In fact, there he is. OK, so. OK, so this will be a vote on social media. I imagine. First one out of the bag. Oh, it's the Never Ending Story.

So Never Ending Story plays Nightmare on Elm Street. Shall I predict? No, no, no. I'm not allowed to do that. No, no, because you'll be steering the jury. All, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,ash. Oh, well, I'm disappointed by our audience's response to Splash, so it looks like it may be Richard Gere's trumpet winning there. Could be, yeah. I don't think I've ever seen Richard Gere's trumpet. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

Please don't let that win. Again, you're directing the jury. Against Spinal Tap. Yeah, there we go. Thank you. Goodbye, Indiana Jones. Against Spinal Tap. Yeah, there we go. Thank you. Goodbye, Indiana Jones.

OK, next, it's going to be 16 Candles. Four Candles against... Norse Eager of the Valley of the World. Wow. Which we mentioned earlier on. What's that? Norse Eager what? Norse Eager, the Hiawmi Azaki film.

OK. Dune. The original David Lynch Dune. Timothy Chalome. Playing the natural. Well, again, that's going to be harder to call than you'd expect. Back to the Future. Boom. You can enjoy hearing me write down against Terminator, Terminator.

So that's two of the most iconic movies of the year. Both of which, both of which involve somebody going back in time to destroy the future. Very good. Amadeus. Amadeus. Amadeus. Amadeus. Amadeus. Against the Killing Fields.

Oh my goodness me. Which finishes of course with Imagine by John Lennon, doesn't it? Oh, I think I've forgotten that. Amadeus against the Killing Fields. So, play's Once Upon a time in america okay muppets okay the muppets take manhattan plays police academy very good well that's that's a done deal isn't it is that it nope blood simple plays footloose okay oh simple plays Footloose. Okay. Ooh,

The only, only, only, only, only, only ghostbusters. The original Ghostbusters. Too many men in that film. Places in the Heart. Wow. I saw that one. I, I, again, I think that's, I think it's decided itself as an Insightful and Paul Top Gun.

Top Gun. But wow. Interesting. No Maverick. The Karate Kid. Okay. Okay. Okay. Top Gun versus the karate kid.

If you follow us on social media, you'll see all these. Okay. Gremlins. Yeah, she's fantastic. Plays Purple Rain. Ooh, that's a good match. Okay. Paris, Texas.

What is great? Is Gremlins playing Paris, Texas? No, Gremlins is playing Purple Rain. This is Paris, Texas against Company Wolves. I say Echo Front. Is that it? Again, I'm clear on what's the winner for that. You live with moral certainty.

I do, I live with moral certainty. That's the money. There it is. I think some interesting battles there. Colin Club against Splash, Indiana Jones against Spinal Tap. Neverending story hits Nightmare on Elm Street. That's an interesting one. Gremlin's Purple Rain. Top Gun versus Karate Kid.

Muppets take Manhattan against Police Academy. That'll be close. Beverly Hills Cop against Once Upon a Time in America. Which of those do you feel challenged by the most, do you think? Of Beverly Hills Cop or Once Upon a Time in America? No, no, no. Of those as the draws came out. were there any that you'd wrestle? Back to the Future against Terminator, that's...

I mean, I think I'd go back to the Future. It's weird that the two time travel movies came up against each other. That's really difficult. I think Splash versus the Carlton Club is going to be an issue. Well, my guess is that Carlton Club is going to win. Yeah, which is foolish because Splash is a better film. And I'm sorry, it just is, but there we go. I love Richard Gere. I love Richard Gere.

Mason- Yes. We'll catch up with how the competition develops next week. Thank you very much indeed. You can vote for all of these on our various social media platforms. Mark, your film of the week. Mason- Well, I think by a mile it's Kincaid's Kingdom. I think that's probably your film the week too, isn't it? Yes. I mean, I don't normally get a vote, but obviously if I'm agreeing with you then I do. So yes, I entirely agree. The movie of the week is Ken's Case Kingdom. In proper Siskel and Ebert fashion, that's what's called two thumbs up.