KFC Radio - Abella Danger Shares Her Thoughts on Bonnie Blue - Full Episode

Episode Date: June 17, 2025

Timecodes: 0:00 Start 00:59 Abella is writing her thesis on p***ogrphy 05:34 Abella walked so these OF girls could run 08:52 honest d*** ratings 14:06 Abella's thoughts on Bonnie Blue 18:32 Abella is Sweetheart of two fraternities 22:49 Abella changes her answer to who is the oldest person to have s*x 24:39 Swinger Culture 27:06 Why Abella loves law 30:02 Meeting George Clooney 33:45 Is a**l going out of style? 36:14 babynames + will Abella have a kid? 43:48 Abella going to Law School +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Omaha Steaks: Go to https://www.OmahaSteaks.com to get 50% off sitewide during their Fourth of July Sale. And use Promo Code KFCRADIO at checkout for an extra $45 off. Minimum purchase may apply. See site for details. A big thanks to our advertiser, Omaha Steaks!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC radio on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon music. Yeah, I know. I haven't actually seen it, so like I can't confirm, but I mean, picturing watching that, like, yeah, it doesn't do it for me. Yeah. It's almost too like transactional.

Like you're at a deli counter like next next next Alright, Abela's back! So wait if you're on the verge of graduating I feel like last time you were here you were probably about to embark on like when was last time you were here? I was here like I feel like right when I got into UM yes I was like I say I feel like right when I got into UM. Yeah, so I was gonna say, right when you started your college journey. Yeah, I definitely came when I started like my community college journey

and then came back like when I got into UM. Yeah, that was at the old studio. It was your first time in this studio, right? Yes, I love it, it's such a nice set. How is visiting colleges going? Oh my God, NYU is like my second school that I really really want to go to and if I go there Then I could get my JD and also get my master's in philosophy at the same time and that's like super important to me

So if a Bellatanger is a master of philosophy I'm writing my thesis right now. What's your thesis on? I'm arguing the morality of pornography, actually. Let's go. If there's somebody to do that. Let's walk through this. What's the thesis of the thesis? So I mean, a thesis takes a year. So right now, I'm in the first half of it.

I finished the first half, which is all the research. I'm using all the most popular ethical theories to argue the morality of pornography. So the first half of the thesis is just like a little bit over 10,000 words where I am breaking down what these ethical theories are with my own thought experiments and a bunch of research. And then now for the next six months is when I'm going to actually argue

using these ethical frameworks. Really? That's awesome. You argue them to a panel, right? Yeah. And I had to have a professor be my advisor as well. So I had to go to the head of the philosophy department and say, I want to argue the morality of pornography.

That doesn't seem like, I'm sure that's not a totally average choice, but also doesn't seem like I'm sure that's not a totally average choice But also doesn't seem like like a crazy one, right? A lot of people argue you don't really see a lot of people defending. Yeah. Yeah now does he know you're a danger? I did tell him because he said that I could write about it and because he said that I could write about it and then I had to pick an advisor and I really wanted it to be him because

Not only is because he's the head of the philosophy department But because I've taken his classes and I just think he's an incredible professor and philosopher So he was like do you want it to be one of the other professors is you want it to be me? I was like I really wanted to be him. So then he agreed and Then when it came time to meet and actually discuss what we were writing, I was like, I feel like it's very important that you know. There's a big piece of the puzzle that you've got to understand.

This is the reason why I feel very compelled to write about this. And yeah. So you're in the. He's obviously, he's. I imagine for him that would be kind of exciting, not in the pornographic sense. I bet.

But we're like, oh, now I'm going to argue this point with someone who's been on the front line. kind of exciting not not in the pornographic but like we like oh like I'm like now I'm gonna argue this point with someone like who's been on the front line yeah this is like Michael Jordan in this shit yeah it's it's yeah it's so cool that I'm getting to do that so hopefully I'm done with it in December so you're just a reason you're in the read you're not writing it no I'm already done with the research and then now I'm doing the actual arguments this entire next semester I'm in the research page myself. Yeah Doing last six months research as well

Do you have you notice like in your since you're visiting college campuses now, yeah All right, would you say you're more famous now from porn or from only fans? I don't know I feel like from social media maybe social media is all yeah I feel like people like me on social media. That's very true. Yeah, like a lot of people are like I know you from Instagram Yeah, yeah, well there's so there's very few I think that like have a personality that's constantly on display outside of porn You know, but I mean I am I found out the other day I had no idea that I am the most viewed porn star on porno I didn't know that I would have told you that I could have told you that For the last 10 years ago till now. I got a ticker at the stop 10 right?

But like even if you were I can understand if you didn't know you were like number one But that shouldn't be that big of a surprise now. No it really was because I retired so long ago It's been five years since I've shot so okay Sorry to interrupt you there But I were talking about that before you came in, where I was like, I don't know if she's still working. Because you obviously do a lot with Brazzers, I see on Instagram. Yeah, I'm a Brazzers ambassador, for sure.

OK. But that means you don't shoot. I don't. I do a lot of non-sex promotional things for them, which is really fun. And then are you doing OnlyFans? Do you do any sort of sex work now? So I do OnlyFans, and I connect with my fans on there and I do shoot like exclusive photo shoots that are

but they're I mean I don't shoot porn anymore on there. No. You're done. Out of the game forever or like coming out of retirement? But for now for sure. Yeah. I can't say forever. It is like one of the best jobs ever. Like, and I still firmly stand by that. I just was the worst job. Sorry. No, actually, I can't. What's the worst job? I mean, in general, the worst job you've ever had. Oh, my worst job

that I've ever had. I mean, you started pretty early too. I mean, you probably really had a lot of jobs. My first job I did get fired had. I mean you started pretty early too. I mean you probably really hadn't had it. Yeah, I didn't really work a lot of jobs. My first job I did get fired from. I worked at a bunk cake stand and I was caught making out with a delivery guy. You were shooting porn before you even started.

I do, yeah. I mean, that's like a plot right there. But she didn't fire him. She didn't fire him, that was very rude. It was. It's for real, that's not fair. And then, when did you start? I started Bring when I was 18.

Yeah, so you might have had a summer job as a kid or some shit, but you never really had another. Yeah, I worked other jobs, but I liked them all. They were all in sales, and I liked sales. I liked going up to strangers and talking to them and getting them to buy stuff. And you do have an OnlyFans right now? Like, you're making money off that? Yeah. I wouldn't say I'm making a shit ton ton of money for me. Well, that's what I was gonna say though is like, I mean, you must be doing pretty good and happy and because you could be. I mean, some of the numbers that only fans girls are making are bonkers. Yeah, for

sure. And they deserve it. And like, I feel like but you could if you want to just flip a switch and do that now. Yeah, for sure. I mean, honestly, it's so that girl Sophie ranges posted that she made 75 million dollars this year Yeah, and if you wanted to I thought you could just do that Yeah I think it's never been a better time to be in the sex industry and do as little as possible and make it the most money Possible like when I got into the industry girls are making close to nothing and we're doing like the craziest We're doing the crazy. Yeah, but we were like the real like

Love of the game and now it's like these girls can make so much money like literally doing nothing or shooting like five-minute Clips on only fans, you know what nice to have like it's almost like you're sitting on a winner winning lottery ticket We're like look I can do it if I want to yeah I need to it's a nice feeling. Yeah I mean is there thought like really though? First of all are these you think all these numbers are true? Not that I doubt it, but sometimes I see these not like 75 million dollars in a year is like yeah You're one of the like best jobs on the paying jobs on the planet Earth is that you believe that?

So the problem is it's kind of hard to believe a lot of things on the paying jobs on the planet Earth is that you believe that so the problem is it's kind of hard to Believe a lot of things on the internet You're telling me the internet's not true And I mean especially like with clickbait like it is just so common practice online to just exaggerate or lie about things It's always just like a screenshot of like some sort of bottom line. I'm like, I don't know what that is What are you showing me like? Yeah, I'm like, I don't know what that is. What are you showing me? It's very normalized, but I don't know if I believe it. I can only tell you what I make.

Well, what do you make? Nothing. I mean, I don't know if I want to tell you, but it's nothing close to that. I mean, are you kidding? That's crazy. What are you making a month? I would say like a hundred K.

Good for you. Yeah, you undersold it told it earlier you like I make a little bit but a hundred K for and it sounds like you're doing only what you want to do photo shoots and like you're not doing shit that you're like fuck I go live and like talk to my fans and like message them and I do I do do dick ratings that is one of the like the I would have never guessed that was the thing that is like a very big part of it it seems like it's so interesting and like we I like print them out and

You print out the dick. Yeah, and then there's like a section where they like put their name and then they said they have it's like a photo of their penis right next to it and then I just What's your what's your rating You just jump simply one to 10? Yeah, one to 10. Are you honest? Or do you give them a look at it? Yes, and I said that one day.

I was like, listen, I'm going to start being very honest about this, because you really need to know. So will you be like, that's a two? Yes. But some of them are quite impressive. I can't imagine anybody who's, if I know the deal and I'm like this girl's going to print out pictures of this and talk about it on the internet I'm only sending like a couple tens. What does your trash look like?

People must be like this is insane. 8.5 by 11 printouts of dicks. I'm picturing like in the movie when they had to take a bunch of And went through 8-and-a-half by 11 for douts of dicks. Just these huge. I'm picturing in the movie when they had to take a bunch of files to the shredder. It was just these huge, clear plastic bags and dick pics. I just feel like a critic. I feel like a cool critic, a movie critic. But it's a dick critic.

Yeah. What qualifies as a 10? You know, certain quality. But they have of it. I'm like, you as a 10? You know, certain quality. But they have of it. I'm like, you get a 10. Because they send back the response in a video. How many 10s have you given all time? You know, a couple.

I would say I've given over 10. OK, but that's a small number, though. And a lot of 9s. I mean, I'm sure you've done hundreds, if not thousands, of these by now. So 10 is like, you know, you are top the crop. Yeah, if that ever happened I mean that you have to That's got to be like on your dating profile or something. Yeah Hi, nice to meet you. We're on a first date. Can you just watch this little like cameo video?

You need to know what's going on here Is the guys that like want me to read it again and I'm like, babe, I'm like, you're like. It's not going to change. Oh, if you gave me a 10, I'd fucking ask you to rate it every day. No. It's a new angle. Angles are everything, too.

Are you ever like, hey, that's not, I know what you're doing here, and that's a trick. We all know the tricks. I like when they put something for reference. Yeah, TV remote, or I usually use a bottle like that size. You know, totally. Why am I so good with that? What's the best angle?

Um, to get like a real, like the best angle for it to look bigger than it is or the best? Yeah, yeah, that one, Abela. How do you make it smaller? I'm trying to shrink mine. Well, because if you want to be like really exact about it, or if you want to exaggerate it to look bigger than those are You gotta like point Definitely like the point five from like down here from here Now

Alright guys now, you know, that's that's good information But I I've been saying something for a little while now. I'm wondering what your take on this. I think we live in a post-nude society. I think he's been pushing this post-nude society like some sort of revolution happened. They're too benign now. And I'm not asking for more. I'm just saying like that doesn't do anything for me. It used to be like spicier and it's kind of become just so plain like.

Like when we were in our 20s and like people were sending around pictures like it was like, oh, it's hot. And then I think I turned probably a little bit 30s and I was just like, I don't care about your nipple anymore. That is that's not getting the job done. That makes a lot of sense. But I mean, even if you go back to like ancient Greece and ancient Rome, like naked people have been normalized for a really long time. They were fucking. But they weren't as prevalent as they are now. Now everywhere we go on the internet.

There was a sweet spot I think of like, the technology was there. Oh yes. And it was new and fresh. Camera phones. But people were like, but people were also becoming like sexually liberated and all that.

So it was the perfect storm to be like, let's all send pictures of our genitalia. Yeah. And then once that like kind of, you know, loses its luster a little bit. I saw, I was watching Love Island the other night. It was one of the, I think it was Love Island. Or this season is not that good.

It's fine. But like last season was like great reality TV trash. And this one's kind of like, I think it was Love Island though, but it was one of those, it was one of those dating shows and there was a game show and it was like, you have to pick other people, like who slept with the most people, who makes the most money, all these things

and you had to guess the answers. And it was like who has sent the most nudes. And so this is all probably like 20 somethings who were on Love Island and like fucking on camera basically and they were all like five, like in their life. Zero, five and I was like, nah that's crazy. And then there was one guy who was like, I felt bad five, and I was like, now that's crazy. And then there was one guy who was like,

felt bad for him, he was like, thousands. I sent like 800 like this month. So I was like, that's the only guy being honest, because I know what you're saying, but also I think it's normalized to the point that people will just be like, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam. Yeah, I feel like nude naked bodies are like art, like, I don't know.

Well, some are. I guess art is subjective, but. Some naked bodies are like art. Like, I don't know. Well, some are. Yeah. I guess art is subjective. But some naked bodies are too. But I very seldom find myself getting actually aroused by nude in the way that you would have like 10 years ago. That's what I mean. Thank you for saying it like that. I'm just not, I don't dislike it.

I do not want it. It doesn't move the needle for me like it did. It used to be like, if you saw a text come through that said like one attachment, you'd be like, oh shit. And now it's like, I'll get to that later. Yes, agreed, 100%. That being said though, I almost feel like it's gotten crazier in other ways than we were talking before about everybody

with a bit of a following is doing a 500 guy gangbang and going viral and I'm sure making crazy money for it and I never thought I would reach a point where I'd be like no. I would have probably at one point been like yeah all girls should be doing 500 gangbangs but I'm it's funny that I'm like this is too much I don't like this. But have we confirmed that they're even actually doing this? I was gonna say I've never actually seen. That's the thing. I've't like this. But have we confirmed that they're even actually doing this? I was gonna say, I've never actually seen. That's the thing. I've seen now videos of guys lining up in ski masks.

They're at least doing that. Or there's a line of guys. But I don't think anybody's actually seen the videos. Yeah, I know. I haven't actually seen it, so I can't confirm. But I mean, picturing watching that, yeah, it doesn't do it for me. Yes. It's almost too like transactional. Like you're at a belly counter like next, next, next.

Yeah. Yeah. But I mean, everybody that does it gets mega internet famous. So they say, Oh, I thought you were going to say rich. Well, that's yeah. So whether you believe they're making the money, but they're at least getting the exposure and you know, the Bonnie blues and the other one, Lily Phillips are like, they're in the news, whether or not that translates to, you know, real money or whatever. Yeah. But I don't know, I do tend to believe them that they're making money because maybe not making $75 million, but like sex has always made money and they're at the forefront of it right now. So I guess can't knock the hustle. But there is a part of me that's like,

you probably could have done like 10 guys. And people would have been like, whoa, it doesn't need to be 500. I still feel like shooting for OnlyFans is so minorly compared to the major leagues that is shooting a scene. Because when you're shooting for OnlyFans, it's really whatever you want. And it could literally be five minutes. But when you're shooting for only fans like it's really like whatever you want and it could literally be five minutes But like when you're shooting for companies such as browsers like you are shooting a 35 minute scene

Like you are on set with a bunch of different people you are shooting with a script like they're producers They want certain angles. They want this they want that Yeah, and they have we literally have ad shots like certain positions that are gonna be ad moments later on right? So Yeah, I feel like it's still super next level. Yeah, but also isn't that better in a way to be like, I get to do what I, I'm not listening to some director barking at me, I do whatever I want, and they're the ones in control?

Yeah, it's better for the performer, I guess, but if you really are a super nympho, and you are just a really really crazy sexual person I feel like the major leagues is like step game up what you're trying to say is these girls are trash I get it you guys step your game up with like these random guys like important like you work with like sex gods that are really gonna like fuck this shit out of you like 45 seconds from a random dude who showed up on like a Tuesday afternoon.

Yeah, like I also think I mean, I'm sure I hope that they're doing all their due diligence and stuff, but it seems like it's really easy to show up with a paper and be like, look, I'm clean. And they're like, okay, go ahead. It's like, I don't know. That's that's crazy. In the industry, you have to use like the past database that you can't even show up with a paper like you have to be in this database.

Yeah, the producers have like, which makes a lot of sense because it's very easy to just come with a piece of paper and be like look that's got zero STDs like I've never had sex I've never had sex with a stranger and and been like a hundred percent positive they got nothing. Peace of mind. Yeah. You do or you don't? What are we talking about?

Do regular people work on it? Like, connoisseurs have sex? I'm actually curious. If you're actually curious, the answer is no. Not that like I don't like refuse to wear them. But I don't have like one night stands and stuff like that. So like I don refuse to wear them but like the people I have sex with where we know each other. Yeah Yeah famous last words But like I I have never been in STD. I swear to God. Never have I. Dodge that bullet. I never even got COVID.

Dodge that bullet. But like I have never been in a spot where I'm like, this is going to be dicey if I get in there. Yeah. I feel like, I don't know, maybe in the heat of the moment anything can happen. But if there's ever enough concern that in my head I'm like, ah, this is a bad idea, I'm probably not going to do it. You know what I mean?

Yeah. But you never know. I mean, kids these days. Let me tell you they're crazy like this girl at my school. She went super viral Because she someone filmed her like having sex in public like in the street. It's like literally on Twitter it was like trending and literally, they were like having sex on the floor like on the sidewalk like of Miami and like and I mean you can't do that. Like you can't do that. Oh, I'm gonna say Miami. I think it's allowed well Miami Exactly the coolest move to film someone and put them on the internet But also if you have sex on a sidewalk and like was it daytime

I mean it was like a bunch of frat boys and like sorority sisters so like Yeah, it was and she's in a really popular sorority and he's in a really popular fraternity And then yeah, I was I was I mean I was like great. No one's talking about me right now Are you I mean I remember when you first were going to school we were kind of joking about people figuring out who you were Oh my god, everyone Okay, So every year a Fraternity will pick a woman that they think is like a very exemplary woman a woman. That's very sweet and kind and Just one. Yes, just one and then every year on the composite Which is like, you know the photo of all the brothers on this in the center

There's a spot reserved for the sweetheart. I'll show it to you after There's some girl came in second that last couple years like fuck Yeah, a girl me to tick tock about me and she like and I'm like girl you literally were right in front of my face You're and you were so nice to me But like all the while you're in because Sydney Sweeney is also a sweetheart yeah at another fraternity at my school because did she go to school or you don't even have to be anybody no it's supposed to be someone that goes to the school thousand percent but her ex is the uncle of the president of that fraternity got it so then and they've literally posted in Sydney Sweeney even

commented back and everything like see you later No, no, but the point is that the girl that made the tick-tock she was like How are we supposed to compete like with these girls like you got a Bella's nature being sweetheart and Sydney Sunni I don't know bitch. You're not supposed to You act like I begged these guys like I'm not even like in the Greek life like yeah, listen There are there's plenty of guys who like played in Michael Jordan's era And they never got to win because Michael Jordan always won I don't know it stinks that you were a pro at the same time as Michael Jordan Yeah, don't be in college the same time as a Bella danger. I'm sorry

Oh my gosh, but I love being sweetheart so much I love all the brothers and I go to frat parties sometimes do you yeah, it's just places go bonkers Oh my god. I'm sure it's actually insane. It's Did Edges of the Places go bonkers? Oh my God. Yeah, I'm sure. It's actually insane. It's, yes. I've seen videos like that.

Yeah. It's super insane. College kids are crazy. Like. I'm sure. I mean, they always are, but these days, I feel like it's. Oh my God.

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Yes. Yeah, I wasn't sure. Yeah, you're still young. I mean, I just feel like everybody at some point goes sober. I mean, I'm not so young. I'm going to be 30 this year. You're still in your 20s. It's crazy.

I don't know. I met you guys when I was like 22 or 23. I feel like... Do you remember? You still remember? I think we brought it up every time we see you. Yeah. The famous answer you gave on Answer the Internet.

Oh my God. No. Let's see if it's changed. I probably don't remember. What do you think is the oldest age? You're definitely going to change now. This is going to be good. What do you think is the oldest age? You're definitely gonna change now This is gonna be good. What do you think is the oldest age someone has ever had sex? The oldest age someone has ever had sex. Yeah, what do you think your answer is now?

And then what do you think you answered back in 2020? Whatever? I think I answered like 50 50 years old. That nobody over the age of 50 has ever had sex. Okay, I changed my answer box. And the way you said it, you were like, I don't know, like 50? Like it was a thousand. That was so far away from me at that point. It was very hard to conceptualize 50. But now I would say, like, you know, I'm sure, like, I'm sure people are going to have sex in their, like, 70s? Yeah, I'm sure. I gonna have sex in their 70s. Yeah, I'm sure. I bet people in their 80s. I think the-

Really? I think Hugh Hefner was still having sex. Oh, yeah. But Hugh Hefner's a different breed. Yeah. But it was- They say old people homes. Were those called?

Old people homes? Yeah. Nursery homes. Nursery homes have the highest rates of STDs. Because they're all kind of alone and dying. And they're like, let's get it in. They are also anti-condom Yes, I heard with the loofahs. Wait, what's that? There's like this famous

nursing home like in Orlando and they all drive golf carts all the old people and they hang loofahs on the golf carts to Show like like the swingers swingers that they are Like Gladys has a green loop That's crazy, what do you think of I feel like swinging swinger culture has had like a Moment like everybody knows the pineapples and the chairs and all that stuff It's like pretty it's gone like mainstream. Oh, yeah I feel like there's probably a bunch of actual real swingers out there who've been doing a long time being like fuck these new people I also don't think the pineapple thing is a sign.

I can't, I do. That feels like the public thing. If you go to Cape Cod in the summer, if you go to any beach on the summer, every house has a pineapple in front of it. We all can't be swingers. Everyone can. But I would have heard about that. Someone would have mentioned that at one point that everyone is fucking everyone. I don't know, man. People love fucking.

That part of social media found me the swinger one and I was like what is this? Have you ever been in like a, are you dating somebody now? Yeah. And when you're dating someone are you like monogamous? Yeah. Do you do any, have you done any sort of in a relationship swinging type stuff? No. I'm very possessive. So you couldn't share him?

No, and I mean, I don't expect him to share me either. It's very equal. Usually how it goes, but. I mean, you don't, I've seen many relationships where the girl has sex with whoever, or the guy has sex with whoever, and it's one-sided monogamy. Yeah.

Whatever works, I guess. I don't know. But I think you're right that there are pineapples everywhere, and there are Adirondack chairs everywhere. But I think it's usually the upside down. Yeah, the upside down. So that's why I think what it is is this is a very common decoration that you will see everywhere.

But if you see it like that, that's the people who will love it. And this one, maybe I very recently, this was in New York, actually, down in the Cape. I saw a guy with an upside-down pineapple tattooed on his calf and I was like that's that's too much Yeah, like even swingers gotta be like relax. Yeah, what if what if what comes the day when you don't want to swing? Yeah On your body permanently, bro. That's do you guys have some issues? You guys don't have tattoos? I he does I don't I have only white ink tattoos. I just got another one. I saw that the other day Let me see. I don't even know you can't really see it now. You can see this one. This is like a healed one

That's like really really light. That's the day I got into yeah, so I only so till the naked I don't have tattoos, but this one is FYP M. Have you guys ever seen good fellows? I've seen it, but I don't know what FYP M is fuck you pay me. Oh, okay I was like I was like I have no idea I was gonna look like such a pose look I've never even seen good fellas okay yeah I just did not put that together so what is the plan to just become a lawyer yes and like and like what kind of law so I I mean ideally if I could have like any job in the world I'd be like an NBA agent and it'd be like negotiating their contracts. Yeah, but obviously that's like really difficult

So right now it's like so hard to even like focus on what I'm gonna do after law school Because I'm so focused on just getting into the school that I want to get into yeah, and yeah, and it's a lot of work You know yeah that people usually do to make money and get rich. You're already making a hundred grand a month Yeah, I don't really care about I'm probably making less. Yeah, you really gotta love the love the game I feel like a lot of people do like you get into law because you love it or whatever But then like you got to take on loans and all this shit and then so there is a big like financial Incentive to like get it done and get a good job when that's not really like the carrot in front of you It's kind of an interesting. It's really got a lot love it. Yeah, I am very just motivated by knowledge.

And I... Sorry, please continue. No, go on. No, I was just gonna ask you, what about law specifically that you love? So I like seeking truth and I like argumentation and I love that laws, there had to be a precedent to set them.

And even from when I was in middle school, I remember wanting to be a lawyer when I grew up and just thinking that that was just such a cool job. But then going to school and studying philosophy was what really nailed it for me. And I was like, yeah, I really wanna go to law school. I was gonna say, the master's in philosophy was kind of a surprise.

I knew you were doing all the law stuff. But I am a little philosopher. I've conducted like my own arguments and Prior to the one that I'm working on right now, which is So I basically argue Okay, let's say that let's say that humans and animals are not equal right, let's say that let's say that because animals are not equal. Right? Let's say that. Let's say that because animals, they are not capable of living meaningful lives. That's like a really big argument as to why humans

are better than animals. But then consider the humans that are capable of living meaningful lives, but then they're still living living meaningless lives. So then would it not be fair to say then that animals are equal to humans living meaningless lives? And yeah, it's a whole thing. I can send it to you if you want to read it. Yeah, fucking send it. That was a good argument. You got me.

Oh no, trust me, you need to read it because I write. There's like a really motivated elephant out there. I write. It's just as good as the bum sleeping on the couch all day. No, and it literally sounds like me when I talk. I'm so sassy with my class. Do you do like debate club type shit where you're like arguing in real time?

What do you mean? I was on the debate team. For such a long time. It was iconic. I loved being on debate. Oh right, I remember saying that because I feel like if I was preparing for my debate and then I stepped up against Abel I was like, oh I don't know, there goes all my fucking plans and there's... Oh no's so many of them fold.

Yeah. And lose around and then ask me for a big job. Oh, wait. Most important question I've had to ask you. What do you think of George Clooney now you've seen him? Oh, my god. OK, so let me preface by saying he's in my top three of actors of all time.

Sorry, I just want to set the stage real quick. Abel and I have DM'd a little bit. Abel went to Good Night, Good Luck this weekend. Play on Broadway. Clooney was in it. He's fantastic. I saw it with a woman. And she was like, I did not realize Clooney

was that ugly. What? Thank you. I was like, what are you talking about? Can I tell you, I met George Clooney afterwards. No. I have a video. I was in tears. I was like, what are you talking about? Can I tell you I met George Clooney afterwards? No, I have a video I was in tears. I was in tears. So after the play, you know how you can Wait for the actors to come out and obviously those things are like filled with people who didn't even go to the play They're like just sitting out there waiting the entire time

but Thankfully, there was a kind gentleman working security who recognized me. Oh, thank goodness. And I didn't ask him or anything. He just was like, do you want to get in here and wait for the actors to come out? And literally right in the front. So I'm right in front of the barricade

and I got all of the actors to sign my play bill. And I was freaking out. I was like, I can't believe I'm about to meet George Clooney. She was literally right there too. And I was just crying my freaking out. I was like, I can't believe I'm about to meet George Clooney. She was literally right there too. And like, I was just crying my eyes out. Like, and he was- Did George know who you were? No, but he was the kindest. He was the kindest man. First, he goes around and signs every, whatever anyone wants to sign. And then he comes back around just to take pictures. Yeah. I'll literally show you. And he looks handsome right? Oh my god

it's stunning. She was saying he looks old and frail and admittedly the black hair looks ridiculous I get that. Oh no he came out already he washes it off like after every performance. He was the guy by the way when you answered. No. He did a CNN interview. This right after. Oh he did a CNN interview. Oh. He did an interview with fucking I think Jake Tapper Yeah, and it was black in the show. So then how did he get? Oh wait Cuz that you saw the last show. Yeah I did. I bet he got ready. He's probably like I'm done for the last show did like You know Yeah, you know cuz when he was cuz he's been I've seen him like doing it. It's gotta be a

Yeah, no, because when he was because he's been I've seen him like doing it. It's gotta be a boy do I every time? Yeah, so he must have because it was the final show. He was the guy when you answered 50 I was like, what about George Clooney? Fucking 50 like George Clooney back. I mean he's he's like 70 now Really? It was probably like 55 when you said that I'll literally show you the video after this. I actually Tears, I'm just gonna go said top three who your other okay He said that. Oh, my God. He's so nice. I'll literally show you the video after this. I actually in tears. I'm just going to Google it real quick. Said top three. Who you're other.

Okay. So Robert Downey Jr. Oh, he's 64. Sorry. Is he 64? And you're calling him 70. Damn. Well, you said that he wasn't having sex. So yes. Okay. So Robert Downey Jr., Brad Pitt and George Clooney

and then De Niro and Pacino It's a good that's a good squad. I know you did your own, but you know, they're both still having kids there But they're my god, dude. I know I saw that I think so. Yeah, do you realize how hard it was for me to picture? I'll be she don't do near. I'll have sex. I was like was like how did this happen? They both just had kids. Yeah. I said if I was De Niro's kid like like one of his older sons like I would sneak into his bedroom at night and give him a vasectomy. Oh my god. You can't literally cut it out dad. I'm 60 bro. I can't have a three-month-old son or brother. I just like a real brother. It's crazy be so pissed There goes like a chunk of your inheritance

Some Game of Thrones shit, I'm gonna smother that baby I've never watched Game of Thrones, but what are you watching? I watch House of the Dragon. I did like that one So you never watch Thrones, but you do house drag. That's crazy behavior. I never wanted to watch it I made it like my whole personality like I'm not watching that and I did try to watch like the first episode and then there was like twins having sex and I was like, oh Yeah, and it was like so low budget compared to like House of the Dragon like I'm glad I watched that Funny they say that like yes, you're right comparatively. It was low budget, but at the time also No, I would I would yell at you to go watch it but knowing how it ended

It's like really not worth it. But those early seasons are if you like house of the dragon. Yes Early early and mid you would like love then like I was okay with the uncle and the knees but the twins was a No, that's redraw a lot And it took me so I surprised like they're like doing a doggy sound. Yeah, they were fucking fucking Like they're like doing a doggy sound. Yeah, they were fucking fucking they wait. Can I tell you guys some secret? never bothered me at all And like and I think maybe I don't know like that doesn't like I never watched like step porn like that doesn't do it for me At all. I did that is not what does it for you? anal mostly

Really? Same, bro. Come from the same truth. Come from the same thought. You asked the question, I gave you the answer. I feel like anal is going the way of nudes. What? Maybe I'm wrong. Anal is the best. I just feel though, I feel like people aren't, if I had to guess, I feel like people are not doing anal. Like younger people. Oh, yeah, it's kind of yeah It's we've had this conversation before too where at some point the anal is like it's like I want you to want to do it

We don't have to yeah I get the feeling that you would do it and like say do it We don't need to do it. You've already like you've already done the job You know what I mean? Like like the fact that you're if a girl is like down and wants it is almost hotter than doing it. No Well, I was like I'm a professional yeah There's a place that feels better than that right there, but it's the back and forth Well, that's what most girls don't want you to do

Well, then they need to clean out I'm with you. I'm with you. But I feel, you all right? Do you see that? You spill all over yourself? Did it go into your eye? A drop of water, like, come, I came out.

It hit me right in the eye. John, so we can just do John on camera with a Bell of the Angel given facial. That's on my baby names list. What? John. John? It's a good one.

It's in top three in my baby names list. What else you got? They're kind of bad. People always laugh at my baby names list. What else you got? They're kind of bad. People always laugh at my baby names list. I mean, John's pretty straight arrow. You say John, and they start laughing. John, no. John is like the most normal one in there.

John, Jonathan, just John. No, John Vinsay or John Bennett. They have to have a middle name. John Bennett, if I may say, that would be tough for him. John Bennett. John Bennett. Yeah, I would think of John Bennett. He's going to get a lot of John Benets.

Yeah. OK, we're moving that. Take that off the list. That lore is deep though. That lore is crazy. Who do you think did it? Oh my god. So, like, it changes because a couple years ago I thought it was the brother.

Brother. And then that got like ruled out or some shit, right? Yeah, I don't know. The Dr. Phil interview kind of like, I don't know. Wait, what are your other names? What? What are your other names? Oh, like Wolfgang Mozart My name or Wolfgang Mozart my name was supposed to be Maximilian. Oh my god, it's on there

Wolfgang John, I hope you have three boys and those are Thor. Thor is in there. Thor no middle name. What about Luke? No, Luke is not in that was and then Freddie Princes on because I love Freddie Mercury and then I and then I think Freddie Prinze you know Troy Thunder Troy Thunder yeah that just sounds like someone's gonna work in your industry are you planning on having kids? Yeah, one day. Yeah, like, but a surrogate. It's not like any surrogate.

Yeah, I froze eyes. You're not fucking out of pregnancy shit. Well, yeah, because it's just like, on a more serious note, I'm like very anemic and like, it would be like such a high risk pregnancy and I'm already going to be 30, so it's like I'd rather have like a younger person. Isn't there kind of like a... part of me would be like, I'm an emic, I'm sorry I can't. I gotta do the surrogate. No, dude, I'm not even kidding. Like something that's like bad enough that it's a high risk, but not bad enough that it's like really bad for you?

It was kind of like... They're like, no, I can't even be on birth control because I also have like blood clotting. Like so then... So are you just out here risking it? Yeah, but there's only a short window that you can get pregnant. I track it. Like, what are my days this month? There's not really that many days you can get pregnant. I know, which is crazy. What did I just learn? And guys can get pregnant, are fertile every single day.

Oh, Yannis Pappas is a stand up in property owner. And he's like, I just learned it. It's like five days a month. I feel like I see this stuff all over there. Wait, you just learned that as well. You didn't know that either? Yeah. You thought a woman could just get pregnant any day?

I thought fucking, yeah. No. You just learned that as well, you didn't know that either? Yeah. You thought a woman could just get pregnant any day? I thought fucking, yeah. No, it's like a really, and it's not even five days. No, I think it's like two or three, yeah. That's why it's so like, when you see somebody struggling who wants to, and then there's like the 16 year old girl who had sex, like the perfect day of the month, you know what I mean? It's like, it really is more of a a struggle but it's the people who want to

get it done that can't and the people who don't want it who do and it's like yeah nature is cruel like that. No yeah for sure it's super difficult but I mean for real like I literally on my period like one time lost so much blood that I like turned gray like it really would be dangerous for me. I like I'm not not against, I'm not being like that. Like I feel like I would meet cute pregnant girl, but it's like, it was really worth like the heartache of it being like a heart, a high risk pregnancy when I could just have someone rent their uterus. When you were working, you weren't on the pill. No. But, and,

and I didn't do using condoms. I didn't do cream pies. No, I did fake ones. What was that? I didn't do cream pies. You didn't do any cream pies? No, I did fake ones. What was that? Just like fake cum? Yeah. Really? Yeah. I didn't know that was mixed, dude. That changed a lot.

I did real anal cream pies. Okay. I don't even think that's fine. I know. I'm like more like, all right, that makes me feel better. Like a gallon of ice cream is falling off my face. No, yeah's not I got it. I'm like more like all right that makes me feel better. I like gallon ice creams falling on No, and we'll come and we'll come doesn't even like come out nearly like I remember Particularly when I was like a whole dude Shane. Yeah, what do they put like a like like a like syringe almost like

Yeah, or like a douche, but it's a bottle. What is I don't know what a douche looks like It looks like a little eight ounce bottle of water. And they just kind of like squirt it in. So yeah, you're filling them up and then they'll just pan to the face and while the camera's on your face, then they're like inserting it and then they pan back down. God, damn. Movie magic right there.

Point five and from the side. Yeah, I never ever got pregnant at work. With the guy finished somewhere else or he just had to stop? Yeah, I mean, or he didn't have to finish at all. He didn't have to. He just grabbed a snack and relaxed. He preferred to. Yeah, I didn't do too many of those,

but yeah, I did have to do them because I was like, I can't do a real cream pie. Because I can't. And not even, but like there was no worry otherwise, like. No. I've known for a very long time that there's only a couple of days you've been pregnant.

Yeah, you guys are smart. Yeah. You guys are doing a little research in this industry. I know that, but it's also, it is still just a. Like how much do you know about your penis? Oh, nothing. Nothing. I know I can take a beat and that's about it.

Do you know how much like, do you know like your T level? We've been talking about doing this for a while. We want to, I want to get our T level measured. Did you see the sperm race that happened? No, no. They did like an actual sperm race where they like over a thousand people tuned in to watch like, which doesn't sound like a lot, but to watch two sperms racing. To get to an egg?

Um, yeah, I didn't like watch the whole thing. But yeah Yeah, that'd be fun if you guys did that. Did you ask me that question? We know you're fertile Don't know anymore right now, but I feel like Look at De Niro, bro. I guess so. I don't know if that's something that changes or not, but I had a couple walk-offs. A couple one-and-dones. So men don't really know a lot about their count.

Well, I don't know how big it is. I have no idea. I've never measured it. I don't know. He's just kind of hanging out there. You've never even measured it. Never measured it. But it's fun if you measure the circumference and the length.

I'm sure it is. I'm sure it's fun for some guys. I got to find a string, and I got to find a ruler. What is it, Matt? I can't do it about it. What was the last time I had a ruler? You could just Amazon a tape measure. I'm not that concerned.

The measure app on your phone. I feel like unless you are at one end or the other, if you're all in the same middle ground, what's the difference? I feel like girls want to know about their vagina and want to know that it's like yeah We're the guy know every year. Yeah. Well, I think there's more just to more upkeep and shit going on down there This is just get big get small He's kind of hangs out. Yeah, but I mean if you suddenly weren't weren't able to get a boner, you'd run to the hospital. Run. Yeah, on that day, I'll find out.

Even that, that's so prevalent now. I wonder if it was always that way, and guys were just dealing with it or suffering from it. I just feel like everybody's on Bluetooth or whatever now to just be like, yeah, if you have a problem, you're losing your hair, take a pill. Your dick's not working, take a pill. I wonder if that, it's almost like peanut allergies

and shit that seems to be getting more prevalent, but it's like, or was it always this way and we just didn't have a solution, you know? For real, that's a good point. I mean, it used to be, you wouldn't even admit to it, and then if you did take something, it would be like a secret, and now I just feel like it's like, yeah, I don't know.

Yeah, no, I agree I agree I wonder the questions make that your next thesis oh god less than they were so they'll go to law school no you know we just got to get through that first no no can't really plan beyond that right because it's just about getting the degree. No, yeah, that's like my main thing. My number one school that I really want to get into is Yale. So that's my number one, NYU's number two. Have you taken the L SATs?

Yeah, I did. What'd you get? I'm taking it again in August. I got a 156, which isn't high enough. What do you got to get to? Ideally, I need to get to like 165. The highest is a 180. So it's not like awful. You're not like far off.

If you were like I got a 120 I'd be like yeah. I feel like I'm gonna do a lot better because I took it in November so I've been working really really really hard on it and my concentration in school is actually logic and reasoning and I took like the this class almost like killed me. But it made, it's literally logic and arguments. So there's a whole section in the outside dedicated to arguments. I can't imagine taking one of those tests right now. Yeah, all my jokes have been doing really good.

I've been doing really good on the jokes. It's like 12 questions and I'll get like 10 right, like nine right. I'm like. The last one I took the GMATS. GMATS? That's MBA? I don't know. And, uh.

Asking the wrong two here. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I got like, I think that was just at 800, like half an SAT. And I think I got a 660 on that or something like that. Wow, that's total. It was like good enough. But I was like, I am done with these.

I never took the SAT. No? No, university maybe doesn't require it. So I was like, not going to with these. I never took the SAT. No? No, university maybe doesn't require it. So I was like, not going to take it. Did you graduate high school? I got my GED. Yeah, I know. And then you went right to work.

And then you just so agile. You lived a fucking life. Yeah. That's awesome, dude. That's really cool. I mean, you packed it all in. Like, you're only 29. I'm so proud of myself.

Because literally, I got my GED and I was like 16. And I was like, one day I'll go to college. I can go to, it's always there. and yeah, then I went to community college. So wait, did you go to high school? I did I went and I dropped out when I was 16 and then I took my GD and I passed it like immediately which says a lot because Forgot two years high school. Yeah, and I mean, you know, that I have my GZ. Like they have all my. That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah.

I do it from the bottom. Yeah. You're here. That's good stuff, man. You know. All right. We appreciate you coming through as always. Oh, thank you for having me.

Thank you so much. You got to do some acting. Oh, my God. I'm so nervous. Yeah. We were saying this will be like your Sasha Grey entourage moment. Oh my god, I love entourage. It's literally the greatest show of all time.

What are you watching right now? Honestly, I'm rewatching Jersey Shore. Ah, good old comfort TV. Yeah. It's classic. Alright, well we appreciate you. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. I'm going to go ahead and put this in the fridge for a few minutes. I'm going to be using a Thanks for watching!