KFC Radio - Baron Davis, Irish Goodbye the Gangbang, and the Raccoon Challenge

Episode Date: February 12, 2019

Baron Davis wants to slap the shit out of Neal Brennan, find out why on today's episode. Voicemails include: leak or shed, never know the shower temp or never take off your socks, winning the break up by getting engaged, the raccoon hypothetical, and how to organize a 5 person gangbang.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Today's episode of KFC Radio is brought to you by Roman. The Romans were badass. Romans had hair and big hard dicks and they took over the world. That's what Roman's gonna do for you. Gonna keep your hair, keep your dick hard, make you a healthy man. Roman.

That's what it should be called. Roman. I'm a man. I'm 40. Roman is your one-stop shop for men's health. They have licensed physicians, certified pharmacies, and they streamline the whole process of getting any sort of medication you need to be the healthiest dude possible.

You don't have to go to the waiting room. You don't have to have awkward face-to-face conversations, no trips to the pharmacy. Everything is done discreetly and efficiently online, and you can get brand name medications or generic equivalents sent to your door for as little as $2 per dose. Go to GetRoman.com slash KFC. You complete a brief online visit, and then a licensed physician can review and either approve you or ask some more questions. It's GetRoman.com slash KFC. So if you're experiencing ED, hair loss, or any other health issues, GetRoman.com slash KFC. Maybe John should go to Roman and get some medication, get healthy, because this motherfucker's

sick as shit and he's Skyping in and what looks like he's a, you know what you look like John? You look like you're a journalist who went over to the Middle East and you got kidnapped by ISIS and right now you're stuck in a cave and you have your beard and your hair's all fucked up and I'm pretty sure someone's about to behead you. That'd be good.

That'd be good stuff. If you're watching on Gold right now, you're seeing quite the scene. He looks like a fucking hostage. I might, there's like honestly, there's a pretty high chance I'd puke in the middle. That would be gold. That would be gold. I'm hoping it for it right now.

I've been so sick, it's been awesome. Oh, you know what I'm going to do? It's been awesome. I'm going to talk about something disgusting today and make you puke. Oh, no. Yeah, definitely. Here's the thing, though. I don't have to clean it up. Will you send over a cleaning crew, too?

No, I will not. Speaking of cleaning, you know what? So I'm like – I really haven't felt well. I've been like just like a wide range of body damage. Last night I was like trying to do things, like thinking I invented ways to be like – to be able to survive being sick. Like I would put the comforter on half my body because I couldn't decide if I was freezing or hot. So I just put the comforter. Like the left side of you is warm but the other side is the one getting the chills. It's not your whole body.

Right. Idiot. When I was getting ready for Skype, I was like shivering. Now I'm sweating profusely. But one of the things I did this morning when I woke up, like I was going to try and come to work today. I thought about it. I woke up at like 930 and went and got my breakfast candy, obviously. And then I realized I wasn't feeling well, so I laid back down on the couch.

Now my breakfast candy is my favorite candy. This is not an ad, but it's these things, these little dark chocolate-covered pomegranate things. Okay. I thought for sure you were going to say Power Patch Kids. Stunned. No, no, no. Well, I mean, they're a different kind of candy. Breakfast candy is different, right?

But I laid back down on the couch with just like – I don't know if I had a handful or a mouthful. Oh no, it just melted everywhere. Yeah. So now I woke up again at two o'clock and had to. Oh no. Take things off. I got to clean my, like, wait, there's nothing worse than waking up and being like, oh, I have so, I have like a really important chore to do right now. You know what happens to me a lot?

My kids shit on the couch and I have to clean that up. Oh, my God. There it is. There it is. There it goes. Wow. I mean, God, bring the camera with you. You rookie.

Bring the laptop with you while you puke. Folks, we'll have to ride solo for a moment here while my co-host goes and pukes. Bring the laptop with you while you puke Folks We'll have to ride solo for a moment here While my co-host goes and pukes I mean That was definitely I did that on purpose But I thought I was going to take like several more things

It took one shot Please don't do that again Next time you puke You bring the fucking laptop with you This is really just a primal thing. I don't think about all this stuff you're going to need. Yeah, it's not like they shit on the couch is that I'm changing their diaper and the shit gets on the cushion. Actually, one time I forgot about it.

Like it happened in the morning and I came I went to work and then I came home and the place just stunk, John. It was just, it was like deep. It was like poop deep into the cushion. It was bad, man. Stunk up the whole room.

Being a parent sounds just like a dream. Yeah. I mean, it's like taking care of you right now is what it's like all fucking time. I was, uh, surviving this week. The Grammy's last night. all fucking time. I was... For surviving this week, the Grammys last night. I didn't think I was gonna...

At like 6 o'clock, I remember they were on. Yeah. You persevered. I made it through. I fell asleep immediately. I thought it was a very bad Grammys. I think the Grammys is always the best of the year because of the musical performances,

and I thought this one stunk. It wasn't. I mean, there's really... There were no exceptionally memorable parts. No, I mean, to be honest, Diana Ross, don't give a fuck about her. I liked her wishing herself happy birthday when it's two months from now.

That was very funny, but her actual performance, I don't care about Diana Ross. J-Lo doing Motown didn't do it for me. You were upset about that, though. Yeah, I heard. What? Puerto Ricans can't do fucking Motown?

What's the problem? I always wondered what the cutoff of what races can say. Yeah, like Puerto Ricans can say the N word. So they can fucking sing Motown. That was, that's right. Right. Like, like Vamani Jones,

we last night that like, she said the N word on Jenny from the block and like, no one cared. So he's like, he's like, if she's not, if she's down to say the N word, she's down enough to do Motown.

If you get a hood pass for that, you get a hood pass for Motown too. Like, fuck it. But I always wondered like, if, if like Asian people feel left out of that kind of stuff. Motown?

Like, no, no, no, not Motown, but just saying the N-word and things like that. I think they're the only minority who can't, right? John, what? Nobody can say the N-word except for the blacks and the Puerto Ricans. No, dude, Mexican guys say it in movies all the time.

Hispanics and black people can say N-word. Everyone else is like, yeah. It would be, the Asians would be the only ones left. And the white people, what? Well, yeah, obviously we can't say it. And the Indians. I feel like Indian dudes can say it. No way!

I think so. No! You think like Mr. Patel? That's like an Indian first name. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe you're right. No fucking way Indians can say the N-word.

Are you nuts? I mean, maybe cool ones, but cool anybody can say the N-word. Like nerd Indians? You want to call up IT? And he's like, what am I? No way. I'm always thinking only exclusively in cool people so yes that

those guys care I don't know I guess I don't have enough you got to get Tony Rock back in here he was he's he's our decider of who gets like the black card and doesn't we got to have him decide JLo could definitely sing fucking Motown give me a goddamn break she's getting from the block I love the Smokey Robinson's

response to it. What did he say? He said, I don't think any intelligent people are upset right now. Well, I put that on my tombstone, man. That's pretty much every controversy ever. Fucking A. My dad called me, though, during the pre-show on the red carpet. My mom was watching.

And he's like, just saw my guy Diplo on TV. It's amazing. The fact that your dad has partied with Diplo is so fucking funny. What a goddamn world. He must have been like, that is Cinderella, the clock strikes midnight

and the carriage turns back into a pumpkin. Him going from that weekend back to his regular life. Holy shit. It's a miracle he didn't just disappear. Google hunting style. Love you, Paul, but this is it for me. I'm out. He probably thought about it. He probably thought about it. I bet you

thought about it with him. Dad, let's just disappear right now. Like local Fall River man and son both mysteriously died in Atlanta.anta they're gone they disappeared no one's ever seen them again uh we got baron davis on the program he says some shit on it it's an interesting interview one that i didn't think think was going to take the turn it did but he did and uh so definitely listen for that.

And we will get into our voicemails now. They're brought to you by 1-800-Flowers. Two days left. Nope. Wrong copy. Valentine's Day is coming up. And you got to get your girlfriend a gift, your wife a gift, your mother a gift, your boyfriend a gift, your, you know, your crush, someone you're creeping on,

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and a half roses for $29.99. First voicemail. What do we got? What's up, KFC? Superproducer BC and Logan. Alright, so my fiance just dropped a bit of news on me, and I'm not quite sure how to process.

Last year of college, I would wake up completely soaked, talking sheets, comforter, and my girlfriend's now fiance used to say, oh yeah, when you drink, you get super sweaty and sweat through everything. So fast forward to now, I pointed out that it's been a while since I've gotten so drunk that I got super sweaty and started to take the sheets in the comforter. And she just responded, oh, yeah, you weren't sweating through it. She was pissed.

I was just pissing in the bed. Oh, I knew this was going to go there. Oh, now that makes me nervous. Like, what other kind of secrets Could she keep Yes I mean that That is exactly Where my brain is going

This dude's wheels Are spinning What Where's your brain going That Like what else is she Lying about What else is

What other Fucking tall tales Has she been telling Bro I mean If I was her i would be concerned that i'd married the stupidest person alive i've been wait you believe me this well yeah i mean that that i mean there's a reason why everybody was thinking it as the voicemail was you know unfolding it it i mean i i thought that immediately you. So if someone told me that,

I don't think I immediately would be like, uh, you're lying. But I think after a couple of times, I would, there's a humongous difference between sweat and piss. Take this from a man who has tried this move once before. It's just sweat. And you're like, uh, no, it isn't. Here's my thing. When they were like, you know, I would wake up completely soaked. And you know,, oh, no, it isn't. Well, here's my thing. When they were like, you know, I would wake up completely soaked. And, you know, if you were if you were sweating in bed, it's like your pillow and where your fucking chest is.

And like you sweat from everywhere. So was this girl just pissing all over the bed? Oh, yeah. No, I mean, when you pee in bed, it spreads out to your head. It gets I mean, when you pee in bed, it spreads out. To your head? I mean, maybe not to your head. To your, like, armpits? You're going, yeah, you're reaching nipple level for sure. Oh, you guys, you bedwetters are fucking disgusting.

You guys need to all be eradicated from society. Take John, take all this girl, take all the bedwetters, round them up, and throw them off a fucking cliff. Dude, I mean, I don't totally disagree with you. Yeah, you better not. And I don't want to hear this like I'm reformed and I don't do it anymore. Once a bedwetter, always a bedwetter. You got that gene in you.

I don't say that shit. You're going to procreate and make more bedwetters? Throw you off a fucking cliff. You don't, you don't, let me tell you what, you don't ever say you're a reformer, you don't do it anymore, because the weekend you do that, you say that, you catch up. You're asking for it. Yeah, you're coming. Yeah.

You're pissing. You're pissing. You're pissing. You get so cocky, you say, I know how to control it now. Next thing you know, you're piss sweating. You find yourself right back in the mix, right back in with the rest of the crew, say on that i i know how to control it now next thing you know you're piss sweating you find yourself right back in the mix right back in with the rest of the crew just like calling the boys like fellas guess what we back that's like you know an alcoholic being like no it's all right i

can do one like i'll just you know i'll just have a glass of wine the next thing you know you're sucking dick for fucking crack in the alley you alley You're off the wagon real hard Yeah I mean I also have an extreme problem With the female bedwetters You're way worse than the guys I used to have a girlfriend who We were both bedwetters

We just pissed on each other Like every single weekend night. Just like we wake up intertwined, just like soaked. Oh, my God, dude. How do you even go to bed at night full well knowing you're waking up in a pool of piss? Like you just said, John, there's nothing worse than waking up when you know you have a serious chore to do. You were worried about a little melted chocolate.

What about every day in college when you woke up soaked in urine? Gross. Like the famous Sinatra quote, I feel bad for people who don't drink because when you wake up in the morning, that's how good you feel. Yeah. I feel bad for people who don't wake up in you wake up in the morning, that's how good you feel. Yeah. I feel bad for people who don't wake up in a pool of piss. You know what is the worst? Like, at least with you, at least with guys, like, you know, your dick is there.

And it's just like, you know, kind of pointed outward. And, you know, the pee comes out of your penis, you know. With girls, when you piss the bed, it just like overflows on you. It's disgusting. You're fucking disgusting. Girls, if you pee the bed, listen to me fucking really carefully. Girls, if you pee the bed, you are fucking disgusting. You deserve no happiness in life.

I hope you don't find love because if you're pissing on somebody like John, like John was just getting pissed on all night, disgusting pigs. I kind of want to see it. What do you want to see it like what do you want to see like for scientific reason like how the how the girl pees the bed like how it just comes out of her like what if a girl well okay what if a serious question here what if a girl what if a girl's laying on her back and she pees what happens it got It got us, guys. Listen, all those girls you just offended. Let us know.

If you pee in the bed, just take a quick video. Just like get a night vision camera. And I just, I don't want to see like a nightly sleep. I just want to see a night when you have to pee. This is all getting bleated. It's horrible. Does it go up? I was thinking, does it drip out?

Does it even... I feel like it just... I feel like it just falls out. Yeah, that's what I think. What did you say before? It's like a broken water fountain or something like that? Yeah, like a faucet without a hose attached to it. You're disgusting, girls.

You're fucking vile. Next goddamn voicemail. Yo, KFC Fights. Just a little quick hypothetical, or would you rather? Just getting ready the other day, and I was thinking, you know, how shitty it would be if you didn't know the temperature of the shower when you get into it. And I know my girlfriend showers twice or three times a day.

I don't fucking understand it. But would you rather never know the temperature of the shower you're getting into and you have to get into the shower? So you can't just, like, put your foot in and it's four degrees and step out or never be able to take your socks off. into the shower. So you can't just like put your foot in and it's four degrees and step out or never be able to take your socks off. Just two of the really like most enjoyable things you have in your day, the max hot shower and taking your clothes off and changing at the end of

the day. Let me know. See ya. Dude, what is this girl's, I respect this girl. I like this girl because in my experience, women don't shower. Women never shower.

Oh, really? Not as often as I do. First of all, if you're hitting three times a day, you don't have a job. You know what I mean? You have to have the time to do a midday shower. That's crazy. I feel like... Well, girls, they're not as gross as us.

So it's like they don't have to shower. If a girl doesn't shower, they can get by with it. If I don't shower once, you know. You know. Their hair. They don't like drying their hair. That's why they don't shower. They'll still take showers. They'll just not get their hair wet. Yeah.

I can't leave the house without showering. And it's not even really for how I – I mean I do care about how I turn myself to the world. But it's not even really about that. It's just part of the routine. Yeah, but you all – I mean I physically feel disgusting. My armpits and I stink and it's just terrible. So a shower is a very important thing. Dude, one time in college, I was – I think I might have missed this point.

It was like my freshman year and I was taking this girl back to my apartment or back to my dorm room. And she was like – she posed the question to me, how often do you shower? And I was like, well, we have baseball practice. So like I shower in the morning to wake well like we have baseball practice so like i shower in the morning to wake up and then after baseball practice and then sometimes before bed so like i was at this this stage of my life i was a two to three time shower guy she was appalled by this she was like that's disgusting i shower like every three days this is this is in vermont mind you

and uh so you know that kind of vermont gal yeah yeah yuck a classic burlington chick and um yuck and so i had armpit hair too i honestly don't work no i would i wouldn't remember that but uh so we got into my room and i said uh i said i said i said i'll sexy like i just like shower let's go shower together. And we hooked up to the shower, and I was like, she was in it. She was thinking we were hooking up. I was in there just giving her a scrub. I was like, I'm trying to be sexy and going down, but I got a bar of soap with me.

Got a loofah up in there. She was giving me a blowjob And I I had shampoo No Where'd it go? You just You just like hit her on the head With the shampoo

While she blew you? That's fucking abusive One of like The kids in our halls Like It was probably a couple of weeks Into freshman year Just came in

You know classic Just stole all our clothes. That kind of. Classic prank. Yeah. Unbelievable. I remember in high school, a girl in my grade was hooking up with an older dude. And he used to make her shower every single time she came over.

That was the rumor in school. Wait, she was hooking up with an older guy? Yeah. Not like an older, like still in high school. Well, you know, we were freshmen. he was like a senior or something like that And the rumor was that like every time Like she would come over his house Right to the shower

Why? Because he just like wanted his girl fucking clean Before they went to town Some crazy shit for high school though That's Like you're still showing up to a guy's like home Like their mom and dad are downstairs like hi hi Mr. and Mrs.

Smith I'll be right back I gotta go fucking shower before you know your son eats my pussy or something. Christ almighty. That's some Dennis Reynolds shit. Right exactly. Yeah like before you come to the golden god you must be clean. Shit. I mean he does that.

Yeah. Right. He's like got, he does that. Yeah. The way they go skiing. Right. And he's like, got the turtleneck on. Yeah, man. It's fucking disgusting. Answer the question. Yeah, what's the question? Would you rather never be able to tell what... Oh, I mean,

listen, first of all, you gotta decide what's worse, hopping in a cold shower or like a scalding hot shower. Now, you could see the steam and shit, so you would know. But I'm thinking like for whatever reason, loophole here, you know, you just you don't know. So you're either scorching your skin off or freezing yourself. That sucks. But it's like a quick temporary thing where you then get to adjust it, right?

I guess, yeah. Versus like socks all the time is not that bad except for the shower. No, socks all the time. Oh, I didn't even think about it in the shower. I'm assuming you can change them after, you know. If you have to wear them in the shower, then this is a no-brainer. You have to. It's the water thing.

Yeah. I don't think socks that bad all the time. Every once in a while, I'll treat myself and I'll sleep with my socks on that night. Treat yourself? You mean punish yourself. I think it's nice. I wouldn't want to do it every night, but it's nice every once in a while. No way, Jose.

That shit. I need my toes free. I need my toes out. The skull? I guess, yeah, once you've immediately changed it. But you've got to hope for cold then because hot, I mean, hot will actually hurt you, but cold is just, I mean, you wake up in the morning, it's a cold winter morning.

You're rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. It's still dark out. And then you just get blasted with like zero degree water. I did that once. I did that when we were, uh, we played Caroline's KFC radio, Caroline's, um,

me and Dan shared a hotel room. Yeah. And I do that in the morning. Sometimes I like, you do it on purpose, right? But before I get out, I make it freak.

Fuck. And, uh, I did that. We were, we were sharing a hotel room and I did that. And I was in there and it was like, you know, like when you get cold water, it's like, oh, oh, oh, oh. It was like, I like stand there as long as I

can and I turn, you know, and it came out and Dan was like, dude, were you just coming in there? Yo, I don't know what's funnier. Like, I mean, the thought that you would just be in the shower jerking off, being like, ah, ah, ah. Like, who comes like that, Dan? Have you ever come before? What are you talking about, dude?

Exactly. I was like, bro, what planet are you on where, like, someone comes like that? I got to hear Dan come now. I got to see a girl peeing or asleep. I got to hear Dan come. Oh, my God. Do you think that they're a guy like I'm trying to think about

I mean, I think I just come in silence. Maybe, you know, like a grunt or whatever but like girls are screaming and yelling and moaning and groaning. Are there any guys out there who are like, yes! Yes! Yes! And they're certainly not doing it

alone. I mean, Dan, come on. Alone when you're like clearly trying to be discreet. I'm in a shower. I'm technically in a room with a person right now. I would really bite my tongue as hard as I could on that one. Thanks, voicemail. What's up, KFC Fights?

So I'm a college student living with four other guys in an apartment, and two of my roommates recently had a three way with a total smoke show. After the fact, she suggested the idea of getting gang banged by all five of us. Not really sure what to do. Everyone else is

pretty much full on board at this point, but I'm kind of on the fence. Let me know what you guys would do. I feel like it'd be extremely awkward, but on the other hand, the grill's really hot. It'd be a hilarious story. Thanks. This is a girlfriend or just a girl? I think just a girl.

Okay, so this girl just wants to get banged by five dudes in college. Yeah. I mean, that's... you gotta do that. I mean, it's like... I mean, he's not wrong. It do that. I mean, it's like. I mean, he's not wrong. It is awkward. It's going to go over a lot less smoothly than it is in somebody's head right now. I promise you all these things, but you got to do it.

I wouldn't ever. I don't think I'd ever be the first to suggest it. But if all four of my, like, this is like some classic, like, if all your friends jump off the bridge. Absolutely. You know what, to be honest, if it was like, if it was one other friend pushing me into a threesome,

I'd probably be like, alright, let's do a threesome. If it was then a third guy, and even a fourth guy, I'd be like, this is weird. What are you guys talking about? And then by the time there's a fifth, I'm like, alright, alright this is a gangbang we gotta have a gangbang like I can do single sex

I can do threesome three and four is weird five guys let's go five guys get the burgers up get the fucking cajun fries and the peanuts and let's have ourselves a gangbang yo I've just been wondering what I was gonna get for dinner and there's your answer um

it's also like one of those things where those things where it's one of those nights where you kind of don't want to go out. You're not really feeling it. All of your friends are going out, and you've got to. Because if you don't go, that night's going to be awesome. It's probably going to suck, right? It's probably going to suck if you do go. But if you don't go, it will be unbelievable,

and it will talk about forever, and you'll always be like, God, I wish I did that. It's just like that, except it's gangbanging a girl. It's just like that, except group sex with a single girl. It's going to be bad. It's going to be terrible. It's going to be awkward. You might lose some friends over this. Yeah.

But you might have – John, I'll go as far to say as you're going to lose all your friends over this. And I think you should. I think if you ever have the chance, five guys have sex with one girl, I think you do it. I think you maybe even do like some blood-packed shit and you all just go your separate way. Like that's it. That's it. No, no, no.

You go your separate – the next day, you go out and you reminisce. You talk about it, and then you go your separate ways because that's it. That's the pinnacle of friendship. It's got to be like college shit then though because you got to have like five-year reunion, ten-year reunion. You got to like catch up. Like what's life been like since? Yeah. Yeah, almost like a time capsule sort of thing.

Let's open this up in like ten years and we'll fuck again. That would be such a cool idea to just like, I'm not even talking gang bang here. Like just decide you and your friends. I mean, I guess it's kind of how guys work anyway. What? Just decide you and your friends are done together.

And then we're best friends ever. Cause like, I'm thinking about like someone you see at a reunion who like you didn't realize, like it's always a blast. Cause like you'd never see them, but I guess that's kind of how I am with my friends anyway. Yeah. Like, like it's, it's always a blast because, like, you never see them. But I guess that's kind of how I am with my friends anyway. Yeah, like, it's about, you know, I really like hanging out with these guys, and I don't want to overdo it.

So let's just agree to go our separate ways so that when we do get together again in a couple years, it's just as fun. Yeah, when we catch up, it'll be, you know, right back to the old gangbang shit. Now, let me tell you something. I've watched a couple gangbangs in my life. I think that I could play the part, but I'm certainly not going to know the

ins and outs of how a five-on-one gangbang works. There's a lot of downtime. First of all, are we saying that this girl can go three-for-three? That's a lot for an average girl to handle. I'm thinking best case scenario, she takes two. So that means there's three guys just what? Hanging around, like talking, jerking off, waiting for their turn?

That's weird. Weird. True. I feel like that would be like a situation where I lost it and it wouldn't come back. It would not come back. Because now what? I'm supposed to get hard watching John. Fuck. Just like this.

It could happen. You know, like that's what I mean. It's just for, for non-professionals who don't, who, who sex is still awkward for them. Like porn stars.

It's like, you know, they see everything behind the scenes. It's just, it's work to them for you. Who's like trying to be like, Hey,, they see everything behind the scenes. It's just, it's work to them. For you, who's like trying to be like, hey, I want to have sex with tots. Yeah, right. You don't realize that they struggle. It's all off camera. Well, now you're going to be

sometimes I've seen, I think I've seen like just kick a dude out. Done. John, I know exactly what you're talking about. Those fans, right? When she does the fan thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And she gave that guy ample opportunity. She really did. She gave him several opportunities, many chances, and he couldn't come through with it. By the way, she was tweeting like two nights ago.

I don't follow her because people call you out on it. I check in on her Twitter timeline every now and again. You don't follow her. You follow her. Yeah, and she was ranting and raving about so she's like i i thought like someone had like like mistreated her done something really horrible and like what happened was just one of her fans didn't show up to get his dick sucked like he just he ghosted her and she was furious she did not get to suck that dick yo i bet though i I bet that girl thinks that she's the best dick sucker in the world because she is.

And someone says no to her. That guy's brilliant. He might get blowjobs for life. She's going to be like, I'm going to suck this dick no matter what. It's a smart play. I was reading it backwards. I was like, God, what did this guy do? And he just left me outside

the hotel, never came down to get me. Good for that guy. What a move. Final answer. You do it. You got to do it for the story. You will lose some friends. That girl's a whore. And I think that it's going to be a lot messier and more awkward

than you could ever imagine. I mean, first, I mean, you know, how do you finish? When do you finish? You don't want to be the fifth guy finishing. I'll be the first one. I'll come as fast as I can. Oh, I was thinking I don't want to be first either. Yeah, you don't, but you do.

So you want to be second and, you know, not run all up in someone you want to be second, but first in a spot. Feel me? Okay. I got that. Yeah. I would, I would make fun of the first person forever. Right.

Right. It's like, even if it was like 20 minutes in, I'd still be like, Ooh, Johnny comes fast. Yeah. Right. That is true. You don't want to, it's like anything else in life. You don't want to be the first. You want to be the last. I'll go second

and in a place that nobody has gone yet and I'm out. Peace. And I'll never see you guys again. Mr. Feidelberg style from Atlanta. I'd treat that shit like a fucking starter too. I'd go shower. I'd be home. I wouldn't be like waiting for you guys to finish. No way!

Irish goodbye. That's gang bang in a fucking heartbeat. Yo, what up KFC fights BC super producer. I got a quick hypothetical for you real quick. So would you rather your body just kind of constantly leak? Like every little once in a while, you just kind of a little bit of cum or shit or piss comes out, just kind of happens. Or would you rather lose your hair constantly? Just every day you lose your head of hair,

but it grows back that night and you have to lose it all the next day. So, I mean, that's pretty fucking wild. And yeah, fuck you. Go into the goddamn hymns now. I don't give a shit. That's the end of my hypothetical. I'm probably cut now. What up, BC?

That's all. See you. Bye. Goodbye. Well, I thought he was just going to say your hair falls out, which, in which case, leak away. But if it grows back, you know, it grows back. I mean, mean basically you're turning into a pumpkin like you got until like but like think about it if it's if it's going out if it's like falling out slowly throughout every day yeah like time you're going to talk to people right you're

at work you're full out of hair who gives a shit you almost need the clock to start at like we're back throughout the day yeah yeah you want to lose your hair at like... Grow hair back throughout the day. Yeah, yeah. You want to lose your hair at like 2 a.m. Right. And it starts to grow back. By the time you get to the bar at 7 p.m., if you're like balding,

fuck it. That doesn't do anything. Right. You're saying that's bad. That's bad. You'd rather leak. You'd rather leak than be at the bar

with like slightly balding. But like, I don't know, John. It's like, hey, there's that guy over there. He doesn't have a full head of hair. It looks like it's actually literally falling out as we speak. But this guy over here, I'm pretty sure he came in his pants and he smells like shit. Do you – like what you're just drooling.

Yeah, that's the thing is he didn't even specify which, like, which is the worst. Like, a little bit of pee, a little bit of poop, a little bit of cum, a little bit of spit, like, a little bit of snot out of your nose the whole time. I mean, there's very, you know, if you have a runny nose, people have seen that before. You got, like, a runny butt, it's, you know, you are fucking untouchable. That was, I mean, that was, remember the diet supplement Ally? Nah. Girls loved it. Yeah. I mean, that was, remember the diet supplement Ally? No. Girls loved it. Yeah.

It was like, I mean, it basically was like a hunger suppressant and, you know, hot hydroxy cut, like one of those things, like all in one, I think. And, like, one of the main side effects of that was anal leakage. And it's like, imagine, like, this girl has been fat her whole life. And, like, Ally finally, like, you've slimmed down. Like, you're looking sexy. And then the side effects hit, and you just can't stop leaking poop out of you. Yo, honestly, that's how you know that Ally worked.

Because when the side effects are horrendous, that means that shit's the real deal. You know? If someone gives you a drug, and they're like, oh, no, it's going to make you like super smart and pretty. And there's no side effects. Like, well, then it doesn't fucking work. But if someone says like, yo, this is all good, except for the anal leakage. It's like, well, that's a price I might be willing to pay. So let's cook.

I think I think I'll take the hair, to be honest. You can put a hat on. You can shave your head. I've heard of a bald man being just fine. Yeah, right. Every man poops himself being just fine. Exactly. Exactly.

It's not the best, but you're not a freak. The most important thing in this world, said it for 10 years now, is just be normal. So, you know, bald is not great, but it's normal. Don't be the guy who's leaking cum and stuff like that. I got a hypothetical for you. I encountered it on Twitter. Today's Twitter hypothetical is brought to you by Simply Safe. The mission

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and Wirecutter called it a top pick. More than 3 million customers already use it, so join in. SimpliSafe.com slash KFC Radio. That's SimpliSafe.com slash KFC Radio to protect your home and your family today. I encountered this on Twitter over the weekend. I don't know if you saw me tweeting

about it. This dude, he tweeted out this challenge. I want to get it exactly correct because there were several elements to it. And it's always funny when you see other people outside of the KFC Radio world doing hypotheticals because I don't know

if, you know, like sometimes they think things are hard that I'm like, this is fucking child's play for us. You know what I mean? Right. Or they, I think I did see this. I don't remember, but I saw it. So fuck, I'm still scrolling here. I, uh, it was from this guy. Uh, crunchy slice was his name, so he's got good taste in pizza. A good crunchy slice is always the way to go. And he says,

let me get the exact thing. You receive $52,000, but you must live in an underground bunker for one month with limited food supply and a raccoon. You bathe with a cold water hose. That part sucks. Elevator music plays softly during the night. You cannot go outside. You must feed the raccoon. Now, he specifies, and I actually didn't see this until right now, so this changes things. The $52,000 is taxed. So you're basically walking away with 25, maybe 30. That's a game

changer. That's a lot less money. Now, I also asked a couple follow-up questions. I said, what is the temperament of the raccoon? See, this is where you guys want to dabble in your hypotheticals on Twitter. This is what I do for a living, okay? I'm a fucking professional. So you want to do it right? Let's fucking do it right. What is the temperament of this raccoon? Does it have rabies? Define limited food supply. And lastly, what happens if the raccoon dies?

Because, well, yeah, I live with a raccoon until he's fucking dead. You know, until I kill him, then who cares? He says, the raccoon is nice. You feed it twice daily. It eats bran flakes. The food in the bunker is canned chili and bran flakes for you. If the raccoon dies, the bunker rapidly floods with salt water and you die slowly and

painfully. So you must keep the raccoon alive. Now, I also asked, is there any... Is it drowning in salt water? I know. It's worse. It's worse. That feeling of salt going up your nose? It hurts. So then I asked him, is there any other form of entertainment in which in my world, if I had a caller and someone was asking like for that, I'd be like, being the rookie that he is, he gave me all of Adam Sandler's movie library on VHS. And he also gave me some good housekeeping magazines. I don't need those,

but I can watch Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore amongst many other great Adam Sandler films nonstop for a month straight. I live with Rocket Raccoon, basically a nice raccoon. I can eat total. Remember total? Grandpa used to eat that shit. It's just bran flakes. Chili's pretty good. And nobody bothers me. I get left alone. Now, the tax on the $52,000 is pretty disappointing. You walk away with like $25,000, $30,000. That's really not going to do much

for you. But I might just do this for the single, for like the solitary piece. This is one of those things where I would do it right now just because of how like i get to live tweet it right john you look like you're doing it right now yeah let's say let's say let's say there's internet connection uh let's say you you you can tweet it but like you can't you're not looking at the internet otherwise you can't see anything

else but you get to put your story out there. That's fine. That would be a really great investment for work because people would be... I'd come out, I'd be a good boy in America. People would want to know about me. The raccoon would probably end up more famous than me, but whatever. Those are the breaks. You guys would be a dynamic duo. You walk out and you have that thing walking right

next to you, sitting on your shoulder or something. You guys are best buds. All of a sudden, you're the hottest thing in America. Yeah. There's no doubt about that now if you took that away from me i said the problem with it is the money because like it's not that much money right i've actually what's really fucked up with me is like i have i don't know if it's being around dave or interviewing celebrities i've started to value money much less than i should yeah what can i even do with that i don't know like everything bro like you don't have that money I've started to value money much less than I should. Yeah. What can I even do with that?

I don't know. Everything, bro. Like you don't have that money. Like it. All of the things you want to do, John, it could be accomplished with that amount of money. You want it's more money than you ever have. Yeah, no, I definitely think there's something to like looking at Dave and being like, that guy has millions. And I don't necessarily want to do what he does. Or I see like, you know, Kevin Hart comes through here.

I'm like, that guy made like 70 million just in the last year alone. And he's just still like sitting here on Twitter, just talking with us. How good could it really be being rich? Right. Come on. It's good. But like also, when we have like the hypotheticals we do, like anyone we interview, and like it's always like, would you rather blank or a million dollars? And like people are like, I'll make a million dollars in 10 minutes.

So I just think, look, if Soulja Boy can make a million dollars in 10 minutes, what am I going to go live with a raccoon for a month for? For 25 grand. This is bullshit. Yeah. I mean, if you told me the raccoon was nasty or had rabies,

I'm out. I'm not fucking living with a raccoon for a month that's trying to kill me. But a nice raccoon and like you said, you walk out of that bunker and you are like

the king of the world. Hey, have you seen the documentary The Three Identical Strangers? No, I've heard about it. It's good. It's wild.

It's wild. You know what I'm talking about? They're what? Triplets who never met each other? Yeah, they're triplets who were separated at birth. So the story starts, this guy goes to

community college one day. He's 19. It's his first year, first semester at this school. I don't know if he moved or whatever. And he's walking on campus and everyone's like,

oh, what's up? How you doing? High fives, hugs and kisses. And he's like, boy, everyone here is really fucking friendly. And he runs into this dude who's best friends with the other guy and that guy the best friend was like i knew i can't remember his name i knew that ralph was not actually coming back this semester so i i wasn't supposed to see him yet there he was right in front of me and he

said the mannerisms the face and everything he was like were you adopted the guy was like yes he's like when's your birthday he said like, like, July 12th. That's the same birthday. He's like, you have a twin. I know him. He's my best friend. Let's go. We'll go see him. So he goes to this kid's house and they're, like, staring at each other and they're like, holy fucking shit.

I'm a twin. Then Newsday, there's the Long Island Jews, by the way. It's great. They're so fucking Jewish. And then Newsday runs an article and the triplet, the third, reads it. And he's like, holy shit, I have two fucking brothers. They all get together. And then what I love about it, I actually didn't finish it. I was only like 45 minutes in, so I got about an hour left.

It's like a full documentary. They do exactly what they were supposed to do. And I love to see it happen this way. And I don't know whether it's because they're just New York Jews and they know how to fucking get shit done, but they became rock stars. They opened up a restaurant called Triplets. It was like the hottest joint in the city.

They were on Good Morning America. They went on Leno. They went on and they all dressed the same, like 80, probably like late 70s, early 80s. Because they definitely had that look. I want to say like a 70s, early 80s, because they definitely had that look. I want to say like a disco look blending into like an 80s look. So late 70s, early 80s. Late 70s, early 80s.

And they were just like running a routine. Like they'd be on the talk show, and they clearly were rehearsing it. He'd be like, yeah, like sometimes we even, and the other guy would be like, finish our sentences. It's like, you're just fucking running this racket on everybody. And they were asking, do you have the same taste in women? And they were like, yeah, we do, and just hamming it up. These fucking triplets, they realized they were just gifted a story, and they're running with it. It was great.

You know what's wild, though, is that one was a, the father was a doctor from Scarsdale. One was like a middle-class guy. And then the other family was like, not poor, but like lower class. So all of a sudden you have three brothers, but like one is used to high society and Westchester and the other is like pretty low key.

So I think it actually gets like, you know, like almost tragic in a way in the second half but it's an interesting and the whole time I just kept thinking Asa Akira would love

to fuck these guys remember her session with twins and shit this is like the ultimate have you seen Game of Clones no what's that it's uh

it's basically a dating show where it's like The Bachelor but they ask you your type and they find people that are all like the exact same height with the exact same color oh yeah you told me, and they find people that are all like the exact same height with the exact same color. Oh, yeah, you told me this, yeah.

And they put them in the exact same clothes, and they do their makeup, so it looks like they're not twins by any means, but they are the same height, the same look. Designed to look as much possible as a guy. And you have to pick amongst them not based on looks, based on actual personality. Pauly D. The goat.

And Cara Maria are some of the contestants. Two of the all- time goats right there. Those two just get married. Yeah. They're in it. They're there. They, they are like the contest.

You get cloned. You get to look at all your clones. I would do that. Like, just give me like 10 chicks. So I know I definitely, one of them I'm attracted to for sure. Let's do one more voicemail here.

Speaking of that, about how you find your soulmate was quite interesting. What is this? It was how you find your soulmate. No, but what was it? A TV show or article or what? No, I think it was like a business insider thing. And it was, it was pretty wild. So it was like, it was like, basically it was, you go, go on 10 dates, find out which one you like the most.

And then the first person you find you like more than that person, you marry. That's done. Because it's like it's basically it's like you know the western view of relationships where like you know we actually believe soulmates exist right like that but also you will understand if you marry that person you will understand you still have to put work into it because it's like like i said it's like scientifically designed with like arranged marriages in mind because soulmate marriages and arranged marriages, inversely, happiness happens inversely. Right.

All soulmate marriages, both partners are – not all, but a vast majority are significantly less happy than they were when they got married. They started, yeah. Whereas arranged marriages – They're working at it. We got to make this work. Yeah. They're working at it. We've got to make this work. This is kind of like a marriage of those two worlds where it's like if you go on 10 dates,

that's a big sample size because who dates 10 different people in their life? I don't think many. If you pick the one you like the most, tell her to go fuck herself. The next person you meet, that person, that's your soulmate.

What if I just do this now that I'm single? What if I just make it into content and be like, we're going to call it the 10. Hashtag the 10. I'm going to date 10 of you bros. One lucky winner gets fucking dumped and the 11th is the one.

Imagine that. Who wants to be KFC's 11th? Let's go. I imagine that's like no one would ever have the balls to do it, but I imagine that's a pretty successful way. What if I just did it, man? What if I just fucking did it for a right sponsorship? The price is right.

$52,000 and a raccoon. I'll do anything. Last voicemail of the day. It's brought to you by Scentbird. I've decided I'm going to become a uh a cologne guy i actually this is perfect timing i bought after christmas at cvs they had a table that was like here's all the fucking uh gifts and stuff that you know no one's gonna be buying anymore so they're all marked down i bought some nautica cologne for 9.99 you remember nautica cologne it came in that bottle that shaped shaped like a sail. And it was blue.

And it smelled so good. So I bought some Nautica. And I'm spritzing it here and there and using it. And then all of a sudden I hear that Scentbird is sponsoring us. And they are like a way to like sample. You get like small amounts of different scents, different colognes. So I came in and they were like pick out five. So I'm like give me some Ferragamo.

Give me some Prada. Give me some Gucci. I just named all of the fancy things. So now I got like the best scents in the game. And because it's all small, it's like, it's like, cause I mean, honestly, whenever you see these like jars of cologne, it's like, what is that? That's going to last you 11 lifetimes. So rather than have these monster bottles, you can try out these little,

they come in these little canisters, and it's got all the different vials in it. And that's like all you need. You can have like some of the most, you know, name brand, high-end brands. You can have their scent and just mix it up. You got all different ones to choose from, and you're not wasting it. I hadn't been a cologne guy since since the days of polo blue in like middle school and i was i just i resigned myself to just i wasn't a cologne guy and then when sent bird sent that shit i was like okay never mind yo straight up when you when

you put on some cologne you get that confidence behind you you know what i mean you're like yeah i smell good girls like it as long as you're not like the guy who's like bathing in it. It's just like dressing nice or looking nice. You smell nice. Just why not do it? You get 120 sprays per thing. So it's a 30-day supply. That means you could do – that's enough to apply it four times daily for a month. You're not going to put it on four times.

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different scents of cologne. That's a ridiculous deal. I mean, I paid $9.99 for just like a little bottle. Now you're going to get $7.50. You're going to get four different, you're going to get all sorts of different perfumes and colognes. Go to Scentbird, S-C-E-N-T bird.com slash

KFC and get 50% off your first month. That's Scentbird.com slash KFC and get 50% off your first month. That's sent bird.com slash KFC. Hey, KFC fights, DC going on guys. So I have a pretty funny story. So let's just start this off by saying I recently just got engaged after getting a girl for a little over two years. So when this happened, you know, I got posted to Instagram and all that shit. So what happened pretty much within 24 hours of this picture is three of my ex-girlfriends all texted me,

basically saying, what the fuck? Another one said, are you fucking kidding me and the other girl just sent a huge paragraph telling me how big of a piece of shit i am so all of these are probably sent because i am a big i love you guy and definitely sent it to all three of these girls at one point or another. So what exactly is the best way that you think you've won a breakup, I'd say? So I guess that's my question. This took a pretty fucking vain turn. I thought he was going to be like, you know, like, should I say something? Should I, like, try to smooth it over with them?

Or should I apologize? He's just like, I dominated all three of you bitches. I lulled you into a false sense of fucking romance. And then I married someone else. God damn, dude. Yeah, that was hard. That was hard. Like who relishes in the fact that like, yeah,

my engagement caused heartache to three strangers. I wouldn't like that. No, hell no, man. You're sick. Fuck you. You wouldn't like that. No, hell no, man. You're a sick fuck. You wouldn't like that. That's a bit much. A girl being like, oh my god, I can't believe you're off the market

or like, wow, I was wrong to dump you or like you're the one that got away. You can maybe feel good about that. Get a little confidence behind it, but damn, to just be like, I won you. I beat you bitches. That's over the top. That's over the top shit right there. little confidence behind it, but damn to just be like, I won you. I beat you bitches. Yeah.

That's over the top. That's over the top shit right there. But listen, some people are habitual L bomb droppers. Some people get a little romantic. It happens. It doesn't mean that you didn't, you know,

you didn't have a real relationship or a real connection. It may be in that moment he did, but people grow apart and you got to keep it moving. Find, find the 11th. I can't imagine sending those texts if i was the girl because even if it did rip you apart like you don't want to get that credit yeah yeah well that's the difference between girls they can't stop themselves

i guess as we're sitting here and we're both acknowledging like i wouldn't want that maybe it's even see women might be so diabolical yeah like they know I'm just gonna fuck with that marriage yeah right right like hey you're gonna start off your new marriage being like feeling guilty about hurting me ha ha ha ha that's what they're doing girls are diabolical bitches alright that's it for us today now

Baron Davis is up like I said there's some fireworks in this interview did not see it coming DB is a BD is a very laid back cat. But you push him. You push the wrong buttons and he'll let you fucking know. So Baron Davis on KC Radio is brought to you by Quip. Most important thing you can do is have a nice, healthy, happy smile.

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No, these are Ghostbusters, aren't they? No, they're called the Stranger Things. I actually got them. Oh, for Reback? Yeah. I didn't even know that. Inside, they have the Stranger Things logo on the sole. I always thought the same thing, too. I'm like, these look like Ghostbusters shoes. Oh, shit, I didn't even know that, dude. Inside, they have the Stranger Things logo on the sole. I always thought the same thing, too.

I'm like, these look like Ghostbusters shoes. Oh, shit, I didn't even see that. I was looking right at the base, shit. Stranger Things, look at that. Shit, I'm hip. Good to go? All right, KFC Radio Edition featuring BDon davis is now joining the program what's up man what's happening dude what's going on you got a lot of things going huh uh uh well i'm here for

one thing yeah yeah i do man just hustling you know having fun uh post nba career i feel like you planned it out pretty well i feel like there's a lot of guys who when that when that time comes to hang them up it's like you know in basketball terms you. I feel like there's a lot of guys who, when that time comes to hang them up, it's like, you know, in basketball terms, you're, you know, 35, you're ancient, and you got the rest of your life, and nobody has any sort of plan. I feel like you did. Yeah, you know, I kind of felt, you know, as I was approaching in my 30s, that, you know, 35 would probably be, you know, my years would start weaning down. She's got on that TB12 diet. Huh. She's got on that TB12 diet.

Huh? She's got on that TB12 diet. Man, I should have got on a whole bunch of shit. Should have got on a whole bunch of stuff. But, you know, so I just started mapping it out, and I started making movies, documentaries, things like that, because I knew, like, once my MBA career was over, I could, you know, be a producer or actor or writer for the next 40 years.

So the new thing that we're doing with Peroni now is What The Fuck WTF with Baron Davis. Yep. You got social media star B-Dot, right? Yeah, B-Dot, A-Dot. B-Dot, A-Dot. That's right. I'm just trying to picture what it's like having an NBA superstar having to deal with a social media superstar. That's the show.

That is what the show is all about. That must have been so goddamn annoying for you. Like, I don't know B-Dot from Adam, but, like, I feel like he must think he's king of the world. No. No? No. No. It's actually, like, the show is, like, no. It's it's actually like the show is like more reality.

So more reality scripted. So he comes, you know, he's playing himself and he's trying to figure out how to, you know, get me to invest in his business. And so for me, you know, of course, I'm annoyed. But, you know, I can't I can't mentor you, kid. You know what I mean and so well i just think about with like how social media stars are nowadays like i just watched the fire uh fire festival documentary on uh on hulu and they had a lot of social media influencers like involved in that just like watching them get interviewed some of them are dumb as hell that's what i mean yeah some of them are fucking dumb but b BDOT is like actually talented. Right.

So when I was thinking of the show, you know, I was thinking about how can I create a world where people would feel that it's real, but also like you can take a joke. You know what I mean? And when I start to cast the show, you know, I was really specific about getting social media influencers, right. But finding the right ones who could act right. Or the ones who are humble enough to know that, you know, this was a, you know, a step up and take it seriously. And so it wasn't so much about how big people's social following was, you know, I saw BDOT and I knew that he had talent. Right. And I knew that, you know, uh, that talent could be realized on a different platform. And so I looked at him and then I started like, kind of like mining through social media, who's funny, who

looks the part. And when you start really like diving into a lot of these people that are huge in social media, they're not really, you know, they're great at that. Yeah. Right. And I don't want to take anything away from that. I want to be able to know because that is entertainment. Right. You know, that's how I mean, it's kind of what we do. And you can just fucking

look at what you guys are like. I'm talented. You know what I mean? I can usually look at talent and say fuck you. I usually look at people and be like you were, I know exactly what you mean, Fuck you, I usually look at people and be like, yeah, I want to have you in a movie.

Yeah. Y'all don't give none of that shit up. Yeah, we're trying to get a Mark. We're ready yourself. Right now. Come on. You guys are writers.

You know what I mean? You guys can be writers. Fuck you, Baron David. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That's the name of the show. I mean you guys can be writers fuck you Baron Davis thank you thank you thank you thank you that's the theme

of the show I watched you last year with the Knicks man it wasn't so great fuck you man oh man so that's my character on the show

I'm an asshole and everybody's usually at the end of the day like fuck you Baron Davis because that's gonna be my show I'm gonna start a show

called fuck you Baron Davis but like so like dealing with someoneis because it's my show i'm sorry show called fuck you baron davis but like so like dealing with someone just because they have talent could be like painted like i'm just trying to picture how you deal with with b dot versus how you dealt with like blake griffin or john doge or something like that like so like really like young guys you play with a lot who's worse a lot a lot different a lot different yeah a lot different? Yeah, a lot different, I think. You know, the difference is D-Dot is a good kid, right? Oh, DeAndre and Blake aren't?

No. No, they were rookie. You know, DeAndre and Blake were rookies. And so dealing with, like, DeAndre and Blake, they were, it was an anxiousness, right? And so, you know, when they first came in the league, especially DeAndre, he was just like, he was crazy. Like, he was literally like, you know, he just had, and I remember being 19, having so much emotion and so much drive and also being lost, right, that you kind of like spaz out. So with them, it was more so like trying to get them to like calm down. Yeah, like lock it in the house and calm down.

Yeah, calm down and like figure out your, figure out a rhythm. You know what I mean? But at the same time, those guys knew where they were going to like Blake, Blake was a lot different than DeAndre. DeAndre and I are really close, but Blake and I weren't so close because Blake had his own kind of thought

and trajectory. You know what I mean? He did all right with it. Yeah, no, he did. He did. He did. I, you know what I mean? He did all right with it. Yeah, no, he did. He did. You know, I actually think that Blake has turned out to be a pretty good player. You know, I thought that, you know, he had a great time at the Clippers, and, you know, it could have been better if he would have kept me there.

No, I'm joking. But with BDOT, it's a little humbler approach because the kid, you know, he knows that he has a huge social media following, but he's humble enough to know that, you know, this is I need to be able to cross this line, right? And so when he came in, he went and got lessons on his own, worked with an acting coach, and that's what you want, right? It's just like in basketball.

You want that rookie guy to show up and show that he's dedicated to work you know what i mean not just for the team but for himself because he wants to make himself better and i think that when you're drawing the two comparisons that's what blake and deandre did have they worked work work work and i think that's the similarity to someone like a social media star like BDOT. It's like he actually took the step to do the work and didn't rely on like his ego or his social media prowess and brought that, you know, to the set. Do you ever consider. Plus I roast his ass if he went out and ate his ass up. You ever consider coaching more rather than doing this entertainment angle, like staying in basketball in a front office or sidelines type of thing? No.

I mean, you know, a front office would be great. Let it be a GM or a team president. Because you just sound like you've got the, you know, you at least play the part well. You know, I'm always acting, dude. I'm always acting. Were you like, I could do a GM job And a team president job with my fucking eyes closed No seriously It's like dude I come up in basketball

I know basketball I understand like The analytics of it I understand how analytics, talent, instinct And all that shit work You have the front office job for the Knicks right now Give me your first couple steps I would have to One do a DNA scan of the whole organization. Uh, and if I was

the GM or the president of the Knicks, I just figure out who are our dedicated executives on the team. And I would meet with the executive team first. I would make sure that we're tight, concealed and ready to move market the hell out of to move, market the hell out of the team, support the hell out of the team, but draw the community in closer, right? And then the next thing I would do is I would separate the executive team from my team, right? And create a buffer of people, advisors that could work between, you know what I mean? Work between each vertical, right? So bringing in former players to help the young guys accelerate their growth, but also deal with upper management and media and things like that.

I think it's almost like a Rubik's Cube, right? And if I'm looking at the Knicks, Dave Fisdale is definitely a good hire as a coach. I think they made a couple good draft picks. I do like scott perry i think that he's a a good a good basketball mind um and then other than that it's like you're gonna have to like everybody else would have you know would have to be you know really dedicated to what they want to do and i think a lot of times when you're dealing with the Knicks, people make moves off of passion. People make moves off of fan reactions. People make moves off of what the media says.

And the Knicks have yet to really say fuck everybody, right, and start where they want to start, knowing that they have goals to get to where they want. And I don't think the Knicks have ever had goals, right? And they've never built a system of sustainability where people can actually go and build a foundation set on goals. But when they do that, right, they always hire the wrong person. Every time.

Every time. Because there's no synergy or that just says the upper management or the senior executive team is not always intact so if you knew the real problem is that it goes a step further to the owner the real answer to what you gotta do is you gotta kidnap Adam Silver and rig the draft

so you get Zion and then you gotta kidnap James Dolan and just leave him kidnapped somewhere that's the first two steps. You know what? You still say that after Twitter. When I was here, when I was playing with the Knicks, we actually had something. Right? When I was playing for the Knicks, we actually had something.

And we started to build something. It was the D'Antoni, Lance Sanity, Lance Sanity to Mike Wilson. And then, you know, that team. Then the next year, we came back and had the Knicks tape. Right? you know that team then the next next year we came back and had the Knicks tape right and it was you know I didn't play that year but you know I was uh kind of responsible for being you know the creator of the Knicks tape and giving the players an opportunity to be seen as a collective for themselves right because the city of New York kind of creates isolation and makes every player

a superstar, right? And so you're not really like, once the game is over, everybody goes their separate ways. And I think that when we had the Knicks tape, it actually, we created a culture that allowed the fans, right, that thought we were cool and robed for us, the ride or die fans, to be a part of like the steel curtain, right? This Raider Nation. And I think the Knicks tape was that. And then it also separated the culture and the personality from the players from what the corporate wanted, right?

And that allowed the players to kind of focus in on being rock stars and wearing this badge of honor, right? Because they were more like a gang, a posse, you know, like a thing when they went out on the court as opposed to just playing for the Knicks and thinking you're going to get traded or so-and-so is going to say something. You know, it's like you've got to create that band of brotherhood. What level of importance is there for that? Because, like, so many people often say, like, you know,

the problem with the round for Boston. You know, that year I didn't play. They went to the second round of the playoffs, right? And I would say that was the strongest team that the Knicks have had over probably, like, the last 10 years. And it was all because of – it was all based on the fact that they all had something to tie into. So you put chemistry over talent. Yeah, talent catches up to you at a certain point in the playoffs but they could have

won you know they we could have won the indiana series i think it was just a couple you know plays here and there and then the playoffs your margin of error goes you know strengths very you know smaller and smaller each round you go to but But I think that having the Knicks tape, it actually gave them something to start and something to look forward to the next year, right? And so if you did have new players, they could come in. They could join something. Yes. They're coming in already knowing, like, we don't care who you hang with off the court or party with off the court and how they make you feel. You are a part of

this and if you do something the team you know it was more so like we start getting guys on the team to support each other outside of the court right so when you start you know supporting guys creative endeavors or philanthropic endeavors or you know whatever somebody's doing if the teams if the team if your teammates show up, oh, man, it's like you're a rock star. And that's what we were able to do. That's why the Patriots can win the Super Bowl this year. Probably.

Rams. Rams got it. Come on, dude. Rams. Are you kidding me? You're going to take the Rams over Belichick and Brady? Yeah, all day. All day.

McVay in that way too pretty beard. Hey, dude. The Rams are serious. The Rams are serious. The Rams are good. The Rams are going to have their time, but it's not until Tom Brady dies. They serious. Man. Well, shit.

He's going to get his ass toe up if they play the Rams in the Super Bowl. All right. We'll see about that. We'll make that bet. We'll make that bet. Yeah. You have to wear a Rams jersey. Okay.

Done. You got to wear a Tom Brady jersey. I mean, I already got one in my closet. See, look at that. I got a Rams jersey. I mean, I already got one in my closet. See, look at that. You got a red shirt. I got to ask you. I mean, let's say a young player shows up into this type of culture you're trying to foster, and he says, I was just abducted by aliens last night.

Yeah, that was some stupid shit. Shout out to what's-his-name Neil Brennan for being a dickhead. He was at the center of that? he's just a dickhead and when i see him i'm gonna slap the shit out of him i swear to god what what happened i walk into a podcast like this is neil brennan and his partner they're comedians right so a friend of mine was you know friends with neil's like i'll just show him it'll be funny and so my sense of humor i could be super like you know, friends with Neil. He was like, oh, just show up. It'll be funny. And so my sense of humor, I could be super, like, you know, animated or I can be super dry. And, you know, when I talk like this, I tell stories. And so we were just sitting around on the podcast and I was just fucking around.

We were telling jokes for, like, 20 minutes. And then I just, like, randomly just, like, told this alien story that I made up off the cup. And so after the shit, he was like yo that was funny he like spent like an hour and a half so he's like yeah that was funny i'm gonna edit it and send it i was like yeah dawg make sure you edit that because it was more shit i said in there that probably would have went viral if they would have posted it and so he was supposed to send it to me to edit because I knew I said that, but I would have let that, you know, it would have had more context if he would have played it right.

The fool put out, Baron Davis said he was abducted by aliens. Just that clip. No shit. And so when that clip hit, it went crazy. And then everyone was like, yo, you've been abducted by aliens

and shit like that. So when I see Neil Brennan, I'm going to slap the shit out of him. Now I'll tell you what, I'll give you a little behind the scenes of Neil Brennan here. We had Neil Brennan on the podcast not too long ago. He got really mad at us for editing something. We didn't edit anything.

We don't edit the podcast. So we just quoted where he said, we asked him about his life or whatever, and he said something along the lines of, you know, it's pretty cool to be in my house and say, maybe there are 10 people in the world fucking funnier than me. I am, for sure. He quote tweeted it with

go check out Neil Brennan, one of the 10 funniest people in the world, according to him. I mean, of course he would say that. But then he had this on the side and he was like, yo, take that shit down. I sound like an asshole. I'm like, bro, that's what you said. You are an asshole. Ding dong. I sound like an asshole. I'm like, bro, that's what you said. You are an asshole. Ding dong.

You are a fucking asshole. You skinny fucking twerp. You sick patient baby. Fuck Neil Brennan. This is the first time I actually get to, like, hose on Neil Brennan on a podcast. But when I see him, I'm going to whoop his ass. I swear to God.

Yeah, are you for real mad about it? No, no, no. Yeah, hell yeah, dude. Like, are you kidding me? Like, that's like somebody saying, like, yo, I got you, homie, and I'm doing you a favor. I did not want to do that. I don't even know you like that, homeboy.

I'm doing that for my homegirl, right, for my friend, right? And you told me you were going to send it to me and we were gonna edit it before we put it out now if i tell you that i have to do that no doubt especially where i come from in la right i come from the streets so your word is your bond and then to know that that was what out of everything that we put that was the one thing that he found so he can gain notoriety from it you know what i? That's some clickbait shit. And that's what he said to us too. He's like, you're trying to do clickbait. He's like, yo, it's your quote, man.

We don't edit anything. So everything you said on here is going to be put out. He didn't tell me that. He didn't tell me that. He was like, yo, we're going to edit it and we're going to send it back. So that's how the alien bit. That's why I didn't really say nothing. You know what I mean? People are like, yo, you're abducted by aliens.

I'm like, all right, whatever the fuck. And then people were sending them the New York Post. Yeah, the headlines were everywhere. That was crazy, dude. Do you believe in aliens? Do I believe in aliens? Shit, I think y'all are two aliens. So I don't believe in shit.

I don't believe in you. I don't believe in the fucking aliens. I don't believe in no politics. I'm not an alien. I do believe in them, though. I don't believe in politics. I don't believe in the fucking aliens. I don't believe in no politics. I'm not an alien. I do believe in them, though. I don't believe in politics. I don't believe in shit, dude. Fuck you, Baron Davis.

That's what I'm going to title this. I think you, Baron Davis. I definitely think you, too. I think Barstool are aliens, dude. Where the fuck did you guys come from? Like, out of nowhere, right? You just, like, landed in a frat house and, like. Speaking of Barstool, you were going to come to one of our parties two years ago.

The most disaster party that's ever happened. Oh, was it? We had this kid, Glenny. We still have him. It was his 21st birthday, and he gets a hold of the main social media account, which has a lot of followers, a lot of people, and he just blasts off an invite to his own personal 21st birthday party. He called it the Glenny Ball.

And, I mean, the whole thing was a disaster. We were supposed to invite like 100 people, like 500 people RSVP'd. But you were one of them, and he was running around being like, Baron Davis is coming to my birthday party, man. He's lying in the half. Where are you at? Somebody slapped the shit out of him for lying. No, I'm joking.

No, I never got that invite. He a liar. He a liar. No, I'm joking. No, I never got that invite. He a liar. He a liar, man. I get that. I mean. I need to take over your account and throw a party. Can I do that in LA? I have no problem with that, man.

Yeah, I like that. You coming to the Super Bowl? You want to come to our party at the Super Bowl? I thought about coming to the Super Bowl. Yeah. We'll come watch the Rams lose. It'll be fun. You crazy, dude.

Matter of fact, the Rams will be there. I'll be out there, too. All right. Yeah, I'm going to have all Atlanta come watch the Rams lose. It'll be fun. You crazy, dude. Matter of fact, the Rams will be there. I'll be out there, too. All right. Yeah, I'm going to have all Atlanta cheering for the Rams. Well, you already know that's going to happen. Yeah, well, yeah. I mean, Atlanta, they're still licking their wounds over the last Super Bowl, two Super Bowls ago, so yeah.

Hey, man, that's on them. You know what I mean? Goddamn right at his home. How do you come back from that one? Hey, dude, the Falcons swore they were coming back to the Super Bowl in their hometown. It's like, dude, what are the odds? Come on. Who won the Super Bowl last year?

Eagles. They beat us. The Patriots. Oh. I do. Nick Foles. Yeah, yeah. That's what y'all get.

You know, that's what y'all get. I think, like, a lot of Patriot people be like frontrunners. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. No doubt. But doesn't that come with a team success? Absolutely. Absolutely.

It's like, damn, the Super Bowl is here or the NBA playoffs is here and I'm just watching basketball for the first time. Of course, you're going to pick the winner. That's it. That's what I do. I'm a basketball frontrunner. Of course, you're going to pick the winner. Celtics get all right.

I'm like, hell yeah. Green team, baby. I love them. But you're a Boston dude. I'm a basketball frontrunner. Of course you're going to pick the winner. Celtics get all right. I'm like, hell yeah, Green Team, baby. I love them. But you're a Boston dude. I'm a Boston dude. I played hockey and baseball, so I'm a Patriots, Red Sox. I follow the Celtics. I know they're not doing too well.

I think it came off an 0-3 road trip. But I never played basketball, so I don't have the passion for that like I do for other sports. I'm just stuck over here rooting for the Falcons. Do you? I know so many athletes. Did you love basketball? Did you watch basketball when you weren't have the passion for that like I do for other sports I'm just stuck over here rooting for the do you do you like I know so many athletes did you love basketball like did you watch basketball when you weren't playing yes yeah I feel like so many I can't wait for basketball season to start like in the summertime I'm like damn dude I need to like the void yeah it's like uh it's like who's winning this this year? Until someone knocks them off. But I mean, they got DeMarcus Cousins coming back Friday.

No, I know. But yet somehow I still feel like they're more vulnerable than they've been. No, for sure. I think every year that you do win the championship, right, and they've been, what, four of the last five years or something like that, you know, one, fatigue. But two, you know, you're at the top of your game. So everybody's at home, right, agonizing, one, fatigue, but two, you know, you're at the top of your game. So everybody's at home, right, agonizing, right, or hating that you won,

and they're working that much harder to only get better for you. Right. And not only that, too, but, like, I'm comparing it to the Patriots because it's all I talk about. But, like, every single Sunday you're getting a team's best shot. And you saw it with the five teams that beat the Pats this year. None of them made the playoffs. They all went on a fucking decline afterwards.

You get up for that game. That's your huge game. That's the game you need to win. That's the game you circle on the calendar before the year starts. And that's so hard to maintain that success when you're getting every other team's best shot every single fucking night. Absolutely. And when you're a team like the Warriors or the patriots like your battle tested so sometimes losing to you know teams that are less than 500 are going nowhere is more so a wake-up call right than it is playing you know

the top division you know beating the steelers by two right um you know that that can that level of consistency right is what separate like at the end of the season right it's what separates the patriots from everybody else in playoff positioning and everything right i agree all right dude we appreciate you coming through by the way you get royalties from james harden i feel like when i always think of the beard i think of baron man i should right you should make him shave that. No, I think he's straight. We just need to come up with like a beard product. You know what I mean? We need to collaborate on the beard product.

Thank you. You're welcome for the idea. I'll take a percentage. I mean, I'm sure. You know what's going to happen? They're going to take it. Yeah. Next thing you know, you're going to see like James Harden beard sample.

All right. The show is WTF with Baron Davis. You can catch it on Fuse. We appreciate you coming through, man. Thank you. Appreciate it. Thank you very much. That was great, man.

Appreciate it.