KFC Radio - Best of CCK: Dumbest Moments

Episode Date: December 7, 2020

All the times KFC, Kayce, Carrabis and the caller did or said something truly dumbYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin. Oh. Kevin. You're just ridiculously stupid. Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back. Welcome, welcome, welcome.

Is this Kevin? Welcome back. Oh, yeah, man, how you doing? You good? I know you're nice. I know you're nice, man. Welcome, welcome, welcome back. I thought we had a dog day for a second because Casey Smith wasn't here and then she strolled in at the last minute.

I've been here. Yeah, I've been here. I didn't see you at all today. Well, I did the NFL show this morning, but then I'll be honest. I walked in here late because I was just doing a confessional on you getting selected in Jenga over me. Oh, yeah. So it ran a little long. How'd that feel?

Well, I mean, the red light came on and I had some things to say. I bet you did. But I didn't take any shots at you. Don't worry. Just taking shots at Fatboy? Yeah. Well, the fact that he's, I mean, I don't know. Are you guys still in the hunt for this?

I don't even know. Okay. Well, my five grand is still on the table. That's the whole thing. Ridiculous. I know it is. And Tommy just cut Frankie. He did? Yeah. Who's he picking up? Vibs. Picked up Vibs. That's a whole thing. Ridiculous. I know it is. And Tommy just cut Frankie. He did?

Yeah. Who's he picking up? Vibs. Picked up Vibs. That's a good pick. Vibs has steady hands. I watched him give everyone tattoos. Yeah.

So I guess the rule was Black Friday was the cutoff, but only if you played three games. They had only played two games, and so he was able to cut Frankie after what he called a disgusting display of Jenga failure. I'll be honest. I think every Jenga game should be out in the office like it was because the pressure audience is a big. Oh, yeah. And like the heckling that goes on.

I feel like, you know, what's funny is I think everyone's getting to the point where they're like pretty good at it. It just comes down to if you know the game of Jenga and how the rules work you can't pick anything you have to go three rows down to pick your block right right and basically it comes down to whether or not a new third row appears during your turn right if there's no third row for you to pick once everything beneath is fucked like you're just kind of fucked so it's really just about hot potato which which when is your turn, you know?

But, um, I, I say this about Jenga every time it comes up. It's amazing what it turns this office into. And it's just, I mean, it turns everyone into kids and I mean,

I like just the just juxtaposition of like the serious ish. Nothing we do here is super serious, but like this morning doing the NFL show with Deon Sanders and then coming in and having to talk shit about Fatboy for not picking me in Jenga. You know? Fatboy. I didn't even know if you guys were still in the hunt.

It makes me happy to know that. Yeah, we're in second place right now in our group. When do the playoffs start? Well, I mean, it's technically already is the playoffs. It's like group play. So when does the – I think we have two more matches, I think. Do you guys play Dave and Rhea? If we make it out of our group.

Okay. Our group right now has, you know, they're not in it. It's Ronan, Big Cat, Frank and Nick, and Rudy and Billy. Having Frank in your group is tough. He is a menace. He's a menace to society. Did you see this video he put out today? Frank the Tank dropped a video today.

It's an old video of him interviewing the mayor. It's fucking hilarious. What year was that? I want to say 1996. Oh, shit. It jumped into my mind. Yeah. Like 24 years old.

Yeah, he's like in college. And he's like. Is he Frank the Tank? Frank in college. He's got hair. I mean, it's on his. I have to go look at this. It's on the blog.

I know. And I don't know if it's the way it's edited his... I have to go look at this. It's on the blog. I know. He's... And I don't know if it's the way it's edited, but he's like, hello, we're here to interview the mayor. Thank you very much for joining us, Mr. Mayor. And the mayor just, like, stares back at him and doesn't say a word. It's very... It's funny.

Oh, my God. The tank is... He's a special special man. That is... That mustache. He's got a stache. He's got, like, almost a Ken Bone blue sweater. Imagine if Ken Bone was rocking blue instead of red.

Yeah, that's exactly what that looks like. Yeah, it's like a cable knit. It's funny. Rocket, are you any good at Jenga? Would you be pulling bricks here if you were in New York? I did. They were doing trial runs before they launched dual streams, and I did a few of those. I was pretty good.

Yeah. I feel like that's the beauty of Jenga. That's why it's a fun game everyone's like kind of okay and then they're just like so fun it really i mean it's crazy that hats off to hank i was about to say like we talked about this all the time it was gonna be that good and then i was like oh shit this is something whenever they were like removing the college football set from that room to make the stool stream set i was like well no i was more like well what are we gonna do next fall whenever like we need a college football set in there and pete was like well i guess we'll just see you know how successful it is and obviously it blew up and we can put the college football set elsewhere in this the office

now but at that time i was like you know why don't we just take it out during the fall like we'll have a lot of football and then it can come back and then it just skyrocketed. Yeah. And there's something about Jenga, too. We play other games, but Jenga's really like that shit. It's because it's... The tense, the tension. Oh, my God. I had my dumbest moment ever.

What happened? This, I was... I am mortified by something I did on the podcast today. I've had dumb moments. We've all had dumb moments, but like...

Oh, yeah. But even when I laugh at my... Even when I laugh at my dumb moments, like oh yeah but even when i laugh at my even when i laugh at my my dumb moments i don't i don't really ever think they're like that dumb like maybe i'll get something wrong but i can like justify why i thought that or like or i don't think i'm wrong at all and i can argue at least some point of it or sometimes it's always like opinion based so there's some wiggle room and then there's been two times now. This is my second time in my career.

Prior to this, I really only thought there was one time that I was like truly blatantly stupid. Oh, no. What did you do? What did you do? I like this is a podcast that's released right now. Already out. Like 20 times on the podcast i called the country hungry hungaria over and over and over again because i said incorrect you did fight well but he's retarded

he's an idiot frank fights is an idiot so i now nick is stupid too apparently i thought nick was smart he's dumb i guess you know the buck stops with me. I guess I'm the smart one on the show. Is Hungarian not a thing? Well, you are Hungarian. So I saw, like, this Hungarian man, Hungarian man, Hungarian man did this, Hungarian man did that. So I kept reading Hungarian, Hungarian, Hungarian, and I was like, he's, like, Romanian. You're from Romania. Hungary, you're from Hungary.

Nope, not a country, Kevin. And I said it like 50 times. Wait, haven't you gotten in a fight with Hungarians before or no? Probably. You haven't talked about Hungary at all? I probably, no, I have. You're right. Yeah, I'm pretty sure you have.

I definitely got in a fight with Serbia. Well, you got in a fight with Serbia. No, I think I was on the same side. Yes. Hungarians hate Serbians, so I was like, let's ride, Hungary. So you knew it was Hungary. You know what, though? Honestly, I don't think that's that.

I mean, it's not dumb because I think that you just. Oh, it's dumb. Kevin, you're not wrong. I'm not wrong. In Latin, it's Hungarian, right? Yeah, yeah. So there are, you know, I didn't completely, like, I knew this. I don't think it was an egregious fuck up.

It's pretty. I mean, it's pretty. I think it was just likegregious fuck-up. It's pretty... I mean, it's pretty ignorant. I think it was just like a slip of the tongue. It's like, I mean, if you call... If I called Canada, like, Canadia, you'd be like, you are a fucking moron. Yeah. Well, but also, like... But it's Hungary.

But how often do you talk about Hungary? Never. Right. You talk about Canada all the time. Well, yeah, but I guess if you're over in Hungary... That's why it's not egregious. I don't... Like, okay, so it's not Hungary, but –

So my truly dumbest moment – and this is the dumbest moment of my life. I can pinpoint the stupidest thing I've ever done in my life, and if you too can pinpoint your dumbest moment ever, call us up, 833-85-STOOL. So many. No, that's what I mean. Like, we've all, like, done dumb things, but this was like, oh my god, an unintelligent person would do this. Okay. Actually, oddly enough, this blog was written about quarantining. This was a couple years ago, I think when Ebola popped off.

There was a little Ebola scare. And I said, you're an asshole if you go to Africa and you get Ebola and you come back here. And I was like, you shouldn't go to Africa. I think it was when I was drawing my big map with all my Xs on it. And I was like, but if you do go to Africa, you should have to quarantine somewhere for two weeks before you come back to America. I was way ahead of my time. So I'm writing this blog, and I'm like,

we need to find somewhere that's halfway between America and Africa, like somewhere in the Atlantic that you have to stop over on before you go back to America. You live there for two weeks. You're cleared. You're healthy. You go there. So I Google a map and I did not realize that the map was showing capitals, not country names.

They were showing capital cities. So in the middle of the Atlantic, I see this little speck, this little island, and it says Hamilton. And I'm like, huh, I have never heard of this. What is this Hamilton Island? You speak of Google Maps. And I'm like, fuck it. I don't care.

So I write this long blog all about how you're going to quarantine and live on Hamilton Island and I and I had one moment being like how the fuck do I not know about an entire island off the coast of America in in the Atlantic like this is weird but okay whatever and I write like thousands of words on it and uh it took a reader, a commenter, to explain to me that Hamilton is the capital city of an island called Bermuda. And that there is no such thing as Hamilton Island. It's just Bermuda that you're talking about, Kevin. And I was like, I mean, that has stuck with me. That was probably 10 years ago.

I wrote that early on in my career. I was like, that's it. That Hamilton Island is the moment in my life that i was the dumbest i've ever been you know why i know that it is actually your dumbest moment because you i've heard this story now from you in social settings when microphones aren't even on yeah no you told this story like as like not as entertainment like basically like the dumbest i've ever felt is this i was ashamed of myself hungaria i mean we can talk about the latin root and we can you know, say it's not that. I don't think that's as bad as you think it is.

Hungary is my second. That's my second place one in my mind. But you know that it's hungry. Like, you knew that going into it. I said it like 20 times, though. I can't believe John didn't correct you. He kind of like froze for a second. I don't know.

Maybe he thought something was going on. He corrects me as soon as I open my mouth before I say a word. So I'm like So I'm offended. You're dumb. But I don't think, I know that you know it's Hungary. Because I've heard you say Hungary before. Yeah, it's not like I truly have never heard of Hungary or something. But, you know, I'm not cultured enough to stop myself.

Hungary is like a territory of Hungary. Yeah, I probably could have spun it a little. For sure. I should have just right away said, well, I was talking about the Latin root, you fucking uneducated swine. Yes. But no, I mean, I'm keeping it real. It was just a really dumb. I mean, it's just that I said it so many times.

I was like, we're going to start off today in the Ias. We got Romania. We've got Hungary. I made it a point. Did you find out that it was wrong because of Twitter? Yes. Oh, yeah, that's tough. Somebody tweeted me, and it was Britney Spears going like, ooh.

So it was like every time Kevin says Hungaria instead of Hungary, ooh. And I was like, oh, that's the exact face I bet people are making right now. Or maybe not. Or people might just. I mean, there's probably a lot of idiots out there who were like, oh, I thought it was Hungary. I guess it's Hungaria. They probably thought they said it wrong the whole time. I wouldn't have thought that the two were the same. But if you told me that Hungaria is a place, I thought it was Hungary. I guess it's Hungary. They probably thought they said it wrong the whole time. I wouldn't have thought that the two were the same.

But if you told me that Hungary is a place, I'd believe you. Yeah. That's a good point. Hungary is Hungary or something like that. That's a good point. If you said Hungary, I wouldn't be like, oh, he's talking about Hungary. But, like, Hungary is probably somewhere in the world. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, it's not a totally made-up word. When I was at Deloitte, we were doing some, like, it was like a lazy day. We were doing, like, some geography challenge, like, online, just, like, fucking around. And it was, like, fill in as many countries as you can or something. And this one kid kept calling Belarus Belarus. And he was like, what's the capital of Belarus? And I was like, I've never even heard of Belarus.

I was like, i was keeping my mouth shut because what's that minsk mink i don't even know what the fuck you know but i was like i'm just gonna stay quiet because i'm so stupid i don't even know where belarus is like what's belarus and then i heard like one of the managers yell over like you mean belarus you fucking idiot and i was like oh thank god i didn't anything. There are just so many tiny little countries on the other side of the world that, like, unless it just sounded ridiculous, I feel like I would be like, yeah, that's probably a country. I don't know. Kevin from New York, what's your dumbest moment of all time?

All right. So when I was, like, pledging my fraternity, all right, this is how I got my pledge name. So I had a deviated septum, and I had surgery on it earlier that day. So I was, like, all jacked up on meds. And, like, we're taking notes and everything. And I asked my Pledgemaster, how many J's are in the word knife? How many J's are in the word knife? Yeah, and that's how I got my pledge name, Webster, like the dictionary.

How many J's are in the word knife? I mean, that's just not even close, brother. No, it's not. No, but at least you have the fallback that you were hopped up. Like, if you, in your right frame of mind, you know how to spell the word

knife, right? Yes, I do. So that's good. You can hang your hat on of mind, you know how to spell the word knife, right? Yes, I do. So that's good. You can hang your hat on that. So you just had more of an embarrassing moment where you were out of your mind as opposed to a truly dumb moment. Like one time, my sister at the age of like 20-something, maybe no, maybe she's more like a teenager, but still, she asked the whole family, what animal do potatoes come from? What animal do potatoes come from? She thought they got laid like eggs, I guess.

Yeah. Yeah, that's tough. I mean, there's definitely, like, there's, I can't think of any moment where I was dumb, but I've definitely had moments where I was like, I'm made to feel dumb in this moment. Such as? Yeah, that means you were probably being dumb, Jared. No, I think there's a difference between dumb and ignorant. If the room agrees. Yeah, I was about to say, can we just say that, like,

Jared will never admit that he was being dumb. It's going to be everyone else's fault. Probably. There's a difference between being dumb and being ignorant. Like, there's... That's for sure true. Like, if you were uninformed or uneducated on a topic versus, like,

I just don't know basics of life or whatever. Yeah. And like, it's, it's, it mostly happens in interviews. Like where like you present something to a person that you're talking to and then they correct you and then you feel like an asshole.

Oh, that's the worst. Yeah. Like that, like there's two that stick out in my mind. Like when we interviewed Chris Jericho and I was like, oh yeah, like this is what, like your second or your third book and he was like it's my eighth book

like way to do yeah i know what you mean that stuff hurts that that zings but it's also like i don't know whatever man yeah sorry i don't know everything about you but right and then i interviewed like uh he's a first base coach but he used to be the head coach at a college and i was like yeah like you know you've got the most wins of all time like 500 something wins he's like actually i have like 800 and something because i read i read the number of like how many wins he had at that particular time when it was written or yeah yeah whatever whatever like it was only one school not his whole coaching career and i was like oh my bad i once frankie barelli set me up for failure on this one uh when we were doing barstool radio the first time we did an interview he had a alien type of expert on the show and he gave me the producer like notes on it and it said that

this guy believes that he can contact aliens like whenever he wants so i thought we were having like some crackpot lunatic alien guy on the show so i'm like let's bring in dr smith like you know sounds to me like you think you can just hop on the phone and call aliens whenever you want huh and he was like what are you talking about and i was like it says here that you can like contact aliens at will and he was like absolutely not he was like totally calm completely well spoken and he's just like a an astro like an astronomer who like does take an interest in aliens and has like some theories on them but fucking frank like nothing you know and the worst part was dave was on the show at that point and dave you know dave wanted

barcelona radio to just be like him and his show and like let me talk about my american express points and he didn't want to interview anybody but frank he was trying to like make it a real show and i'm trying to do like a funny like a cool like alien interview so dave's already against it and then like this this awful moment of like no i don't i can't contact aliens and dave was like yeah real great job guys of the interview basically you know and then i was like oh i don't know what the fuck we're gonna do now once you say something like that it's just over it's over with he has no respect for me nor should he and that wasn't your fault i mean i i've said this before like whenever you're watching people on tv and they have like an ifbn and they say or ask something stupid it's not always their fault like there's

there could be somebody in their ear i mean granted they it probably is their fault but like you can get bad information right but then like the worst interview jared you'll appreciate this one the worst one that i think i ever had feeling dumb in an interview was when I did the college, the SEC baseball tournament and Andrew Benintendi was my postgame interview. And I can't remember if it was LSU that they had played or whatever, because he played for Arkansas. And I was like, this was the first time you guys have beaten them in the tournament. And they had played them like two nights before or something.

And I just forgot or whatever. And instead of just being a nice person and just being like yeah you know like you know he was like you know we played him the other night i was like well okay like i'm not do what it's a classic benny it was such an asshole thing to do but like of course like in the moment it's like you know college i was just sitting there it's like well i mean i'm gonna end this interview now like there's no fucking i felt so bad piazza fucking shit down my throat when i asked him uh you know i was like can you uh compare and contrast like art how versus willie randolph and i get that you know in hindsight like that kind of implies you're gonna have to throw willie randolph under the bus but like not really there's

a way to answer that question where you give props to like both people but it was just because i was like a rookie and clearly like didn't know what was doing, and Piazza just fucking... What do you think? He was just like, what kind of question is that? That's weird. I first phrased it as something like, Ardhow's the new manager. No, other way around, I guess. Yeah, Willy Randolph is the new manager.

Can you speak about something like that? And he was like, what kind of question is that? And I was like, well, can you like compare and contrast their managerial styles or like what it's been like with the new manager? And he was like, how could I possibly answer that? And I was like, I don't know. Like one, you know, talk about like their different styles or what you. I mean, I saw him like trying to tell him how to answer it. And then I clearly, you know, it was just like he's, you know, not interested. And I get why.

This was spring training 05. So you're doing this for Fordham? Yes, for Fordham. And like they, I had only been doing spring training. I had only been doing minor leagues. They sent me down. So first what happened was, and these are things I just learned on the fly. I'm down in Port St. Lucie in the clubhouse of spring training.

And everybody is, you know, the guys are at their lockers and you walk around with your microphone and your little, like, at the time we were using, like, Sony mini discs. And you just walk over and you pop in you start asking questions and i see that one guy is talking to mike piazza and i look everyone else is crowded around all over and one dude's talking to piazza and i just should have known that means he like he set this up and he had an agreed upon like i'm gonna do a one on one but he was still just sitting on his locker so i thought it was like fair game so i just kind of like sidle up and put my mic out to try to get some of the sound bites as well and um and i actually didn't ask any questions i was just like i'm gonna try to get some of these sound bites

and then afterwards the guy who interviewed him was was cool he was like yo dude like just so you know i had set that up. And in the future, if you're going to jump in, you should probably ask some questions too. So you're not just like mooching my soundbites. But he was cool. I was literally – I probably looked the part. I was probably like in a shitty – In a shitty – Like a shitty oversized suit, button up, looking like an idiot.

But he was cool and like – yeah, and like helped me. Shut up, dude. Whereas – so then so like i think piazza already kind of was like who the fuck is this kid clearly he's the rookie and then later when it was like when it was a free-for-all and i was able to like jump in that's when he just like shit down my throat so it was in a scrum he did that yeah in front of everybody that's so fucked up because it's like I understand like they don't want to sit there

and answer questions but like I've been in NBA locker rooms to do post game interviews and like people ask dumb questions and they most of the time

the guys just you just keep them moving they give a short answer because you can tell who the new kids are you can tell who the young kids are like shut the fuck up dude but I also respect

that it was like I mean I learned my lesson you know what I mean like like I yeah I would have appreciated it if it was more like you know i'm a uh it's not a great question but it kind of give me a nod like hey buddy you know maybe not not a great question like move on but he you know trial by fire threw me to the wolves and i'm kind of like whatever i don't like hold the fuck if i ever saw bats again for a a while, I was like – it didn't turn me off to the idea of being in sports media, but it did make me realize quick you can't really be a fan and do that type of media.

Oh, absolutely not. Because in that moment, Mike Piazza went from my hero to being like, well, fuck you, dude. You know what I mean? And it's not like I held the grudge forever, but in that moment I was like, I don't like this guy anymore. It desensitizes you. That's what I've said my entire life. When I was in mainstream media covering A&M,

people were always like, that had to have been the coolest thing ever. I was like, honestly, it took me coming to Barstool to love A&M as much as I had again because it was like I can actually talk about it as a fan. They beat it out of you. That was the other thing. So that was spring training training but the one time I covered like them for a game at

Shea Stadium I I was in the press box and they hit they were like a shitty team at that point like on the come up I think in 05 but they hit like a grand slam and like the eighth inning like a big home run and I like stood up and I was like yes

and I was like the only one to do it obviously and i was like you know what fuck this i don't want i don't want to live this life where i can't do this kind of shit no cheering in the press box that's the thing i don't go in there like yeah i mean 2018 they finally gave us the press passes and i'll go for batting practice to schmooze and i'll do my interviews in the dugout and the only time i would ever go in the press box is they have a snack machine in there. But you know what? Part of me wishes that I would get a press pass now and do that and, like, make them remove me. Because, like, because fuck that.

That's an unwritten rule of baseball. I don't fucking care. Why do you care? There's a sign, I think. Why would you? There's, like, a sign in the Red Sox press box. Why? Well, and it's not just baseball.

It's everywhere. Why? Because they – it's so fucking lame. And I understand there does have to be people who are neutral to give news. Like I get that. Like X's and O's, whatever. But I'm not. So like I'm part of the press.

I'm part of the media in a new age form or whatever where I'm not here to be neutral. Because they're fun suckers, Kevin. So whatever. Because they're fun suckers. So you don't have to cheer. You shouldn't cheer. You not here to be neutral. Because they're fun suckers, Kevin. So whatever. Because they're fun suckers. You don't have to cheer. You shouldn't cheer. You're trying to remain neutral. I'm here to write an article about how fucking awesome these guys are.

Well, it's the, like, to a lower level, it's like saying we. Like, if you say we about your team pretty much anywhere other than here, like, they look down at you. Like, I had to break that habit. So it's like if you say we on like local sports talk radio talking about whatever they kill you but i also like i don't care i don't care either part of me which is i could go like get the coverage and make every fucking beat reporter roll their eyes and make someone from city field come and say it to me you know they would and just be like all right i'm gonna make

you do it okay well kevin what would happen is you'd walk in, and before you even started cheering, everyone would be like, Barstool Sports is here. Barstool Sports is here. Yeah, I know. And I was like, what's up, bitches? We almost got kicked out of an awards show a couple years ago. Do you remember that? No, what was that?

Because Erica was heckling the, because we were up against like a hot dog stand or something, and they were like, all right, we got to go. Yeah, that was funny. It was hilarious, but it was just like, yeah, and people were literally saying, oh, that's Barstool Sports. Let's run through some of these dumbest moments here or embarrassing moments. We got Renton from Kansas City.

What's up, Renton? Hey, how's it going, guys? Good. How dumb are you? It's actually not me. It's my two buddies. Oh, sure. I'm in a group chat with them, and

I'm telling them I misplaced something. My buddy goes, why don't you check in your J-O-U-R? And I'm like, what the hell are you talking about? My other buddy in the chat goes, I think he means your D-R-O-O-R. Drawer and drawer? I'm like, do you guys mean the fucking drawer?

And they're both like, oh, fuck, yeah. These are fucking 20-year-old kids back in the day telling me to have a fucking small drawer, and they can't even tell me. J-O-U-R is bad. That is bad. G-R-O-O-R is also horrendous, but J-O-U-R. The fact that he tried to correct them, I couldn't believe it. Yeah, well, did you see there was one that went viral recently? The ones that go viral for like, I mean, we've had Might As Well, Might As Whale here.

I'd be a fucking career off this shit. Right. This one, I think where they posted it on the Barstool Instagram. I can't find it. Oh, yeah. Here it is. What's that Christmas song that goes like, the least knobby dot? And then the guy wrote back,

he's like, are you kidding me, dude? Do you mean Feliz Navidad? So he got it wrong, but he was like kind of close. But the least knobby dot. The fact that that guy's running around Christmas time going, the least knobby dot. I mean, it's fantastic. It's so fucking good.

You know there are so many of those. By the way, you talk about dumb moments. Have you heard Rudy's moment recently? I just was looking at his Instagram story, and it jogged my memory. Have you heard his mayonnaise take? No. So he thinks that mayonnaise, or he thought, he got mocked off of the college football set for it,

but is liquid cheese. He thought it was the same thing as cheese. Like Alfredo sauce? Melted down. Like a cheese whiz? He was talking about mayonnaise because he put up an Instagram story about how much he loves mayonnaise. And people were just telling him how gross they thought it was, which I love mayonnaise, but whatever. He was like, why wouldn't people like this?

It's just liquid cheese. And I looked at him. This was before we were filming, so he was up there with Soul Scenes. I looked at him and was like, what do you mean it's liquid cheese. And I looked at him. This is like before we were filming. So he's up there with still scenes. I looked at him. I was like, what do you mean it's liquid cheese? He's like, the same way that you make cheese is how you make mayonnaise. And the entire room is just like, is he high? Is he?

What is it? It's eggs and vinegar and oil. Yeah. Like it's it's. It is gross. But he thought it was just like he thought it was boiled cheese. And he was like, that's why it's next to the cheese in the grocery store. I was like, but it's not.

Rudolph sometimes says some things that make me laugh. It's just not. I do like the puppy, like my head turns like, what? And we talked about it for a while. I'd probably like mayonnaise more if I thought it was like a cheese sauce, but it's not. No, it's just eggs. And he was like, it's dairy. And I was like, well, eggs used to be on the dairy thing,

but eggs are not dairy. You can eat eggs if you're lactose intolerant. And he was like, so it's not cheese. And I was like, no, it's eggs. Are you telling me it's not cheese? Nat from Boston, what's your dumbest moment? So, I mean, for the past, I don't know, six, seven years I've been driving every single time.

Whenever I pass an easy pass, I drive in the middle of the two lanes to try and avoid the ticket. But every single time, I get tickets every time. Wait, what? I don't even follow. Like the HOV? So you have easy passes in New York? Yes. Yeah, so I was thinking, this is why you don't fogs i'm a fucking dumbass is because when i'm

in the two lanes i'm in the middle of the two lanes i would think that they don't register my plate on the camera and that way i can just go right through so like the cameras like he's saying if you're in one of the lanes that the cameras would be looking right at your license plate and so it would register that you you don't an easy pass. But if you go down the... So I guess we're talking about the ones that's just like the express where you can just drive. You can just drive through it. And so he was saying if you drove...

You're not going through the toll. No, so if you drove down the middle that there wouldn't be a camera. You know what? I mean, I don't hate that idea. It's not going to work, but at least give yourself a shot. Yeah. But I'm pretty sure the camera probably stretches across the entire street. You goddamn dummy.

Let's go to Chris in New Orleans. Christopher, I hear your blinker. Chris is gone. Let's go to Elizabeth in Boston. What's up, Liz? Hi. I have two, and they're both really bad. I feel like girls – I always say this about girls.

Girls can be the most book- smart creatures on the on the planet and then they sometimes will have street smart moments where it's like oh my god your brain well we'll let elizabeth go but i i have i have one that happened to me very recently okay to share with liz what do you got yeah so one um my boyfriend had texted me this was years ago like hey up and adam because i had to go somewhere and i texted back, this was years ago, like, hey, up and Adam, because I had to go somewhere. And I texted back, and I was like, I wonder who Adam was that he was, like, always up early that it's up and Adam. And he goes, are you kidding? And then I texted him back, and I was like, oh, shoot, you're right.

It's, like, Adam. It's, like, science. Like, they move around so much. Oh, no. So, like, he's active. And he's, like, he's joking right now. And I'm just like, oh, shit. I'm like, wait, no, it's up in Adam. So I got it, I got there, but it took me a little while.

Up in Adam. Yeah, and then the next one was, I think we were watching some Browns documentary or something, and there was some headline that said, the Browns exercise the demons, and I turned to my then-boyfriend, now-husband, and I was like, so what if the coach just work them really hard, Browns exercise the demons. And I like turned to my then boyfriend, now husband. And I was like, so what if the coach just like work them really hard?

Like they do a miracle to like make them not like get all like the bad, like, I don't know, whatever. They were doing jumping jacks. I mean, honestly, that's kind of endearing. That's kind of endearing. Endearing. It's like an exercise. I meant endearing.

Oh, right. I think that one's cute. But like for all all I know Elizabeth could have got like a perfect SAT score and went to Harvard it just happens girls are dumb girls are smart while being dumb and dumb while being smart yeah we all have brain dome and it is cute and it's also like you can then blame it on blonde

the one I had recently that is still being brought up in this office which is tough but it really was I realized how dumb it was as soon as I said it but but it was too late. It came out of my mouth. It was master's weekend. And, you know, a group of us were having like a master's watch party and tiger on Saturday was wearing like a, like a pink or like a fuchsia polo with like a black vest over it. And so then later on, somebody new came in and he had already taken the vest off. And so they were like, Oh, Tiger with the fuchsia. I was like, yeah, he's got a great fit on.

He had a vest on earlier, but I really have no idea why he took the vest off. And everyone in the room looked like, because he got hot. And I was like, oh. I don't know. Oh, that makes me feel good. I mean, the entire room. I thought that was going to be way worse. No, the entire room just mocked me.

They were like, so I will walk in sometimes and people will be like, I wonder why you took that vest off. I don't think that's that bad. Thank God, Kevin. You are the barometer. That's probably why, but I don't think that's. They looked at me like I had a third eye. The whole room slowly turned. They're like, because it got hot out.

I mean, that's just because it's fun to make fun of Casey. Okay, that's fair. I'll take that. Let's hit our break. We got Dominican Dylan and Taylor from Long Island on the line, so I wanted to wait until after the break so they got their time to be dumb. But it's a dumb day here on CCK. Call us up.

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I just finished watching the Jets game. I feel like I played in the Jets game. I feel like I played in the Jets game. I feel like I went four quarters. I feel like I went 15 rounds. It was like the biggest fight of my life. I was sweating. Went through blood, sweat, and tears. I went through a rollercoaster of emotions,

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It's a Drake and Weezy freestyle. Casey swears means that Drake is not washed. You mean Lil Wayne's not washed. Yeah, Lil Wayne's not washed. Yeah, this is on No Ceilings 3. And they just put this one out on Spotify. All the other ones are on Dat Piff. But I will say, you cannot listen to this freestyle and say that man is washed.

I text you that, you ignored me. I text Zah, and Zah said, yes, go off, queen. It's like Eminem, too. Eminem can still rap. It's just that he doesn't make good music anymore. This song is fire. It's fire. Drake's verse is fire, too.

Let's get back to our dumb audience here Because I mean everybody This is the most calls we've gotten in a long time It's also because it's relatable Because everyone has those moments Where you're like fuck I sound like an asshole But like everyone sounds like an asshole Let's hope

Dominican Dylan How stupid is our boy Dylan I feel like you might have a doozy on deck I can see you having a pretty embarrassing one My bad. I almost fell asleep while that song was playing. Oh, shut up, Dylan. What's up?

Get the fuck out of here. No, but I have just two. The worst one, I think, was when I met my ex-wife and we were dating. I think we were dating for a year, and she and she's like oh i want you to meet my family because i'm from slovenia so let's go and i was like yeah yeah whatever whatever day of the flight comes i'm like yo for some reason i didn't research anything i'm like yo how long's this flight she's like 11 hours i'm like what the fuck why is it so long to go to a fucking province in canada and she's like what the fuck she's like, what the fuck? She's like, what the fuck are you talking

about Canada? And I'm like, I thought it was like a province in Canada and shit, because provinces in Canada have like Saskatchewan and all that weird shit. I could see, it does kind of sound like that. Yeah, I could see that, like Slovenia and Canada. I mean, it's just blatantly not that, but I could

see it being a little bit, like, it sounds that way, that's tough though because then you got to get on a plane for 11 hours man that's that sucks i thought i was like oh three hour trip little problem yeah no no shit i should have got my edibles ready i'm not ready for an 11 hour trip oh god i hate flying and shit i like the short flight i think the other one was when I was in class in middle school, and the teacher was like, oh, could you name something about a river in like the Great Lakes or something? I'm man-confident.

I raise my hand because usually I'm wrong. So if I know something, I'm like, oh, shit, it's time to be smart. It's my chance. I'm like Atlantic Ocean. I was like, oh, shit, all my boys are crazy. Oh, no. Oh, my God. That is a tough one.

There's a lot from school days where you – I remember a kid. Jonathan Ross was his name. I'll just drop the government name on him. We were in like sixth grade, and he couldn't spell rock. He spelled rock, R-O-K. It was Billy Madison. It was straight up R-O-C-K. It was like he couldn't spell – it was it was billy madison it was straight up r-o-c-k it was like he couldn't

spell it was like rock or stone or something it was really really bad and i was like i don't know my class i pronounced jose jose and she was like what jose and we're like what jose and someone just like jose and she's like oh that's how you spell that one. Yeah, that's, I mean. But, hey, that's what you're there for in school. I can't imagine how many times teachers are like, well, I know you're here to learn, but you are really stupid. You are very, very dumb, kids. Let me get to Taylor in Long Island. Thanks for the call, D.

Bye, Doug. Taylor in Long Island. You got a bad interview moment. I got to give Taylor a shout out. He did a good segment. You got to check out moment. I got to give Taylor a shout out. He did a good segment. You got to check out his interview. What's your IG, Taylor? It's Taylor underscore Ringgold.

R-I-N-G-O-L-D. He's got a great idea where you, what exactly do you do? You pull up all of their best Instagram moments and Instagram pictures and ask them questions about those moments and then i watched the one with ashley brewer and it's just like every every person you interview doing that is happy to talk about it because it's like oh yeah let me tell you like that's my favorite like moment uh like when i was doing this or doing

that and like the person is very eager to actually give you you know information about it yeah so that was good well i appreciate that yeah but what's your what's your worst interview yeah uh i have a couple when i was uh in minnesota with the twins i uh i remember so the first one was it was like the first time i was going in a clubhouse and the cars threw me into the fire. And this was right off of the 2017 World Series champion Astros. It's the first home series in Minnesota. And they're like, all right, go into the Astros clubhouse and go get some sound bites from Carlos Correa about, I think they're going to be playing in Puerto Rico. The Twins are playing Puerto Rico the next week.

And I was like, okay, and I'm shitting bricks, so I walk in and Carlos Correa is automatically being an asshole to me, because he says I don't speak English, which clearly he does and then I have Alex Bredman, Jake Marisnyk and, jeez

somebody else roasting my outfit while I'm trying to interview Carlos Correa not going well and then george springer blasts disco music so that my sound is completely shit they don't turn on the music i'm like stuttering i'm so nervous i get the sound it's terrible and that was a bad moment kind of dumb because i was like you know i didn, I didn't, like, stick up for myself. But my next bad interview, which is legit like a week later, I was interviewing Lance Lynn. And it's like people don't know who Lance Lynn is.

He's like the big-name pitcher, pitcher for the Astros, for the Rangers, and he has a really bad reputation of being a prick to the media. And I took it upon myself. I myself i'm like all right you know he's by himself i want to interview him get a soundbite you know without the whole media scrum uh coming after him and i didn't know after the pitchers start that everybody goes to talk to the pitcher and the first people that talk is like Fox or whatever TV network hosts the game. Well, I didn't know that.

So I see Lance Lynn in a towel. He walked like five, got fucking rocked. And I was like, I'm going to get a soundbite, walk over, say, hey, Lance, you got a second? And he's like, don't fucking talk to me right now. Wait till everyone gets here. And it was in front of everybody. Yeah. It was in front of the entire he was in front of the entire team

um a lot of the media was right behind me and i hated that motherfucker ever since yeah tom glavin did i kind of broke the unwritten rule the other way uh he was starting that day and it was pre-game and he was all alone and that's because they they leave guys alone before they their start and i walked over and i was like hey tom you got over, and I was like, hey, Tom, you got a minute? And he was like, no, man. But he was cool about it. He was like, no, no, no, I'm starting today. And actually, why I still, despite his domestic abuse shit

and how we went down a horrible path, in that moment, Jose Reyes, he was like, come over here, come over here, you can talk to me. He swooped me up, and I had a very embarrassing moment. He was like, come interview me, because he was like, come over here. Come here. You can talk to me. He swooped me up, and I had a very embarrassing moment. He was like, come interview me because he was a rookie, and he saw me floundering and threw me a lifeline. But, yeah, those are the things. You have to just do that to learn that because unless somebody tells you those things, you have no fucking way of knowing the etiquette. But, yeah, fucking Lance Lynn just being a dick to you. It's like, fuck off, Lance Lynn.

Fat idiot. That's how you hate off, Lance Lynn, fat idiot. That's how you hate guys for life. Thanks for the call, T. How happy were you when he fell down on the mound during the playoff? Yeah, he must have loved that one. Yeah, redemption, motherfucker. I'm pretty sure that was the 16-1 game, too. I'm sure. If he got rocked like that, man, you'd just be like,

so, Lance, how was your day? And you're not even supposed to be talking to him. But fuck that. Whatever. It's like you can't talk during this time you can't talk to me you know it's all gonna be like proper and i hate that shit ease up i lasted one day in there yeah it's like they get paid so much fucking money and it's like just eat it for 15 minutes right it's crazy it's crazy i honestly sucks it does suck but like. I honestly. And it sucks. It does suck. But like, just do it. Of course it sucks. Like, I don't.

And when I was with the Atlanta Hawks, like, obviously, when you're with a team like that's different because you get like the rapport with them. But like, you could you just knew the guys not to fuck with in certain moments. Like, it's like, you know what I mean? Like, you kind of like, like, athletes know you're going to come in there. You just ask a question. If you don't feel like answering a question, just like give them a short answer. They're going to walk away. Oh, walk away oh yeah yeah like no reason you know if you want to get through it it's easier to just like do the dirty exactly like now you're making it a thing

now it's gonna be a problem now it's gonna be a headline now it's gonna last longer exactly like i would know the guys that were gonna give me shitty answers and if i absolutely had to go over and talk to them for whatever reason then i would just ask a quick question they would give me a shitty answer and i'd keep it moving, that's the way you do it. Don't be a dick. Right. Before we get to our next call, undefeated Erol The Truth Spence Jr.

risks it all and puts his title on the line against Philly's own Danny Swift Garcia in the biggest fight of the year. It all goes down this Saturday, December 5th, live on pay-per-view. Erol Spence Jr. was on top of the boxing world when the undefeated former U.S. Olympian suffered a horrific single-car accident where he miraculously survived.

Spence, 26-0 with 21 Ks, has a new lease on life, but the same hunger to be the best. Spence will be fighting in front of his hometown fans at Cowboys Stadium. In a career as a two-division world champion, Danny Garcia, 36-2 with 21 KOs, has put together a boxing resume that rivals his contemporaries in both those divisions. His resume is a virtual who's who of standouts at 140 and 147 pounds. Armed with one of boxing's best left hooks, the Philadelphia-born Garcia appears well on

his way to achieving his goal of becoming the next great Puerto Rican fighter. Errol the Truth Spence Jr. vs. Danny Swift Garcia in the biggest fight of the year. It all goes down this Saturday, December 5th, live on Pay-Per-View. Buy it now on FoxSports.com slash ppv and watch it on any screen you want we've got an embarrassing moment with alan iverson that's not a guy who i would really want to uh be like talking shit to me how'd that go uh paul hey what's going on guys thanks for having me

um so i i went to an autograph signing in Philadelphia to meet Allen Iverson, and I got the first ticket in line. I was going to be the first guy to meet him, so I was excited. He's my favorite player ever. I paid for an inscription, too, so it's like, get the autograph, and he'll write some dumb shit on there, too. I asked him to write, we're talking about practice. And he was like, mumbled under his breath, he's like, that's not my M.O. And I didn't hear him, so I asked him again,

obviously. I was like, oh, we're talking about practice. And he shot up, and he started yelling at me, he's like, that's not my fucking M.O., you stupid fuck. I'm like, holy shit, I'm 15 years old, filled with fear right now. Yeah.

I thought he was going to rip my head off. Yeah, that's a scary one, man. I mean, you know, like, it would be a good little inscription to have. I obviously think he doesn't want to talk about it. Like, it's not his proudest moment. But, like, again, you have to realize that it's a 15 yeah it's a 15 year old kid like if it's an adult or something i don't know i think you have to realize like i have a kid who's either being a dick and he's a kid or he's just like being like he doesn't know he's just

being like he thinks he's being funny but it's a little bit like over the line but to just snap i mean ai is not the one you want snapping on you i i don't care you know he's he might not be that big but you don't you don't want to fuck with ai that's that's a no-go for me oh my bad uh i mean i feel like a lot of there's a lot of stories like that too of like i asked for an autograph and they said no and you probably you know you catch somebody on the wrong night or i mean when you sign like years and years and years and thousands of autographs you're probably bound to have a couple where you say no. Eventually, you've got to cut it off. There's always going to be somebody who doesn't.

You sometimes hear the story like, he stayed for hours and signed every single one. And those are the truly great guys. But ordinarily, it's like, I got to go, guys. And there's always going to be one person who gets cut off who hates that guy for life. And that's just the fucking breaks. That's how it goes. I particularly, I don't give a shit about autographs and stuff so i really don't sympathize too much well they're also just like i feel like they're outdated at this point like it used to be like that was how you could prove that you were like with a celebrity

or something like now it's pictures now it's i mean i guess if you collect autographs it's cool but like to me like i would never ask anybody for an autograph like there's not one person on the planet that i'd be like i want your signature plus you can i mean you can forge anything you know what i mean like i'm not saying that anybody should do that but like plenty of people are like oh look i've got my autograph it's like yeah like there's i think they started to find out recently like a lot of memorabilia is all like forged i forged the shit out of my mom's signature in high school yeah my mom's my mom's got a fucking hard signature too it is like what's hard about it the k is we it's it's very intense and like part of it's not scribbled part of it is scribbled the k looks funny there's big swoops in it imagine people in high i mean i guess maybe teachers and principals and all that

just like didn't care like whatever we're just checking our box that this is. Yeah, definitely. They had to have known we were forging everything. I would have to think so. I mean. If you get like a 60 on a test and you're like, here's the signature. Yeah. You know what's weird? When you change your name and you just kind of change your signature.

I didn't even think about that. Yeah. Yeah, that's weird. Can you imagine like you trying to do your signature like Casey Carrabbas? It's like. Well, I'd kill myself before I ever had to do that. we're good Jesus Christ do you think you would change your name no yeah you got enough of a like a name yeah no I think like so my friend Laura Rutledge heard of her she was saying that she changed her name because I mean granted at the time Josh was playing baseball too so he was

like a professional athlete but her last name was Mcckeeman so it was much harder to say than rutledge on camera like sending it down to the field to laura mckeeman versus laura rutledge yeah so we talked about it's like if it's easier to say like much easier or if it's just a famous last name like if i married somebody super famous you know what i mean then that would be different otherwise no beaver oh shit yeah i would change i put beaver across my forehead but no i mean i don't think I would change it. Smith is just, I mean. I also think once you have like a career started, there's really no reason to switch it up. Right, right.

And all I think, it would have to be like Rockefeller. You know what I mean? Like something crazy. Like Kennedy. Yeah. You know, like that. Casey Kennedy would be dope. Casey Kennedy would be dope.

That would be very good, yeah. Let's get to a few more calls here before we wrap it up and send it over to Chicago. We got Trevor in Texas. Hey, what's going on, guys? How are you doing? Pretty good. I got an embarrassing story from when I was a kid. So every kid loves to play outside, climb trees and everything.

So I've got this big tree in our front yard, and I can't quite reach the, you know, the front branch, like the top branch. I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to get, you know, get up this tree. So go to the garage, grab a rope, you know, tie, you know, throw it over the branch, you know, take the one end of the rope and naturally tie it to the bottom of my ankle, ties to my leg. Take the other end of the rope, you know, kind of pull it tight, thinking I'm going to, you know, pull myself up this tree. So, you know, I get it real taut, and then I just yank it, and of course, I just, you know, go flying, drill my head on the side, you know, on the ground.

My mom is standing in the kitchen just watching this whole thing unfold as I bust my ass and come crying in, running to, you know, running inside. So, everyone gets a kick out of that story. Yeah. But you're also like, at that point, it's like, you're a kid. You don't know any better. You know what I mean? Like it's embarrassing. I'll just pull myself up this tree. No problem. I'm strong enough to do this shit. You know? Yeah, exactly. I don't, I mean, Jared, have you ever, thank you for the call Trevor.

Have you ever done something like that? Like when you were a kid that you thought you were way stronger than you actually were? Or like, I feel like kids jump off of things. Shut up, Jared. I've seen pictures of you when you were a kid. You've not always been strong. That's true. I feel like little boys usually do stupid shit like that all the time because they don't know what their strength is versus what they should actually be doing no i don't know i was always pretty self-aware when i was a kid uh i always knew you self-aware right back at you casey i mean i'm incredibly self-aware incredibly let's go to see who's been waiting on the line the longest let's go to anthony in seattle anthony what's your dumb moment uh so it actually happened in quite recently uh i was on uh national radio and uh i kind of said that the world series is

the main goal it's usually just building a good process you didn't mean it all right i love you guys and love you martino uh he's i think he works for sny just went on tv like a week ago not even and was like yeah i mean like the world series isn't really the main goal it's you know you're building you want to build a good process like that's the goal it's like well if you build a good process that's what he just said. Because you want to do what? No, he was making fun of that guy. Oh, whatever. Okay. That was my dumb moment.

Tony, what's up? What's your dumb moment? So this one's actually not mine. A friend of mine, but it's my favorite dumb story I've ever been a part of. So in high school, I was working at Foot Locker, and my friend who was the cashier, I overhear she's getting into it with with the customer starting to escalate so i walk over to see what's going on and um like katie what's wrong she's like the customer's trying to pay with a fake hundred dollar bill you know i use my counterfeit pen and it turned black so that means it's fake and you know the customer's like no i just pulled this out of the atm this is i got from my bank this is valid so they're going back and forth

and i look at her like katie that's not a counterfeit pen that's a fucking sharpie she was just marking it with a black sharpie she marked it with a black sharpie and then accused this guy of having counterfeit money oh Oh, man. That guy probably was like, fuck, do I have... No, there's an actual pin that you you thought you used Sharpies for counterfeit money? It's a counterfeit pen. If it's brown, it's real. If it turns black,

it's fake. She was using a black Sharpie. Jared, you thought you used a Sharpie for that? I don't know. I haven't used cash since like 2011. I don't know. It's been a long time. You thought you just a sharpie for that i don't know i haven't used cash since like 2011 i don't know you thought you just took a black sharpie and if it turned black on the the dollar bill it was counterfeit i've definitely seen people use sharpies yet so everything you would do would be counterfeit you understand that right i mean you're coming at coming at me like I have a strong opinion about this.

I don't. No, it's not a strong opinion. I'm really trying to—thank you for the call today. I'm trying to understand. You know when you use a counterfeit pen— I saw them use a marker. I didn't say Sharpie. It's like whatever.

It's a fucking marker. Okay, well, those are the— What that guy was saying—I know you weren't listening because you were playing with Blackman. What he was saying was the girl was using a black Sharpie to see if money was counterfeit and a counterfeit pen turns brown if it's real, black if it's fake. So she was just accusing everybody of having counterfeit money because she was using a black Sharpie. Yeah.

Well, she's an idiot. Well, that was the whole point of these calls. Doug in Utah, what's your embarrassing story? Yeah. Hey, I'm a new listener. I've listened for about a week and a half, and you guys are already having me call in and confess stupid crap. Love it.

Love it, Doug. Let it all out. That's what CCK is here for. Yeah, yeah. It's like that 10-15 moment, you know, when you're in elementary and you're like, hey, you should write 10-15, join the 10- pen 15 club and then you're like oh you got penis on your arm and then you feel like stupid as you know shit right this is that moment but like when i'm 29 or 30 years old like a year ago so i'm an angel investor and so i got invited to a pitch day for startups to present and ask for money.

Kind of like Shark Tank. But there was an all-women's group doing a woman's company, and I think that was awesome. And they put up on a screen, they're doing a social media campaign to try to get hype around their company. And you guys know what camel casing hashtags are on Twitter? Since you guys are Twitter pros? I don't, but Doug, I'm going to be honest, we have 30 seconds before they... Well, he got... Damn.

Oops, that was me. Oh, Zah accidentally just dropped... Poor Doug. Poor Doug just is like a brand new fan. Doug, call back tomorrow. Yeah, Doug, you know what? You call back tomorrow and we'll talk to you about, did you say camel casing?

Something like that. So Kevin is off interviewing one of the coolest guests ever. Jared and I will be back tomorrow for a Friday. Will you be here tomorrow, Jared? I'll be here tomorrow. Friday edition of CCK. You guys stay hot. Let's get weird tomorrow.

We haven't gotten weird on a Friday in a while. Let's get really fucking weird tomorrow. I'm let's get weird tomorrow we haven't gotten weird on a friday in a while let's get really fucking weird tomorrow i'm down to get weird tomorrow no shirts