KFC Radio - Casey Anthony's OnlyFans Ft Nicky Cass

Episode Date: May 27, 2021

Subscribe, rate, share, and leave a review! -Olivia Rodrigo's new album -Why do we still allow scams? -Hype around Mare of Easttown -Handicapping Mare of Easttown -AITA Thursday -Voicemails Nicky Cass joins the show and talks about the reaction to getting famous "over night", how he feels being called a tiktoker, the characters he plays on tiktok, his passion for making pizza, and much more. Let us know what you think on twitter: @KFCradio @KFCBarstool @Feitsbarstool @nickhammy5 @joshua__dm @nicky.cassYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm here to introduce to you the greatest show of all time. I mean, that is... Call the police. Let's just call the police. Are you ready for this? Are you ready for this?

Like a damn sociopath Do you like that song? That song is so good. I don't know that song. You don't know Olivia Rodrigo? Oh. Is it good for you? Yes.

I don't think it's that good. You don't think so? I don't. Really? I mean, to me, it's like a bad version of Misery Business. Bro, I do like the fucking teenage girl dancing in her bedroom. No, I know you do. Let's talk about her.

We'll talk about her. Even fucking brutal is like... It's one where you just want to fucking... I haven't listened to the whole album really through. I know Deja Vu. I know Driver's List. I know Good For You. I know Traitor. I've been running to Olivia Rodrigo on my phone just to speak her up.

Let's go. It's rolling. It's another edition of KFC Radio on the Barstool Sports Network. It's Clancy and Feidelberg, and we're talking Olivia Rodrigo. I'm glad this happened because I wanted to discuss it. You want to talk about Olivia? Is she too young to be obsessed with her? And I'm not speaking.

You said that. Is she too young to be obsessed with her? And I'm not speaking... I am... Is she too young to be obsessed with her? I don't even know what she looks like not covered in stickers. I've seen like... There's your answer. If you only see a girl covered in stickers, she's too young for anything. I've only seen what it looks like when my Spotify is playing. I've never

really Googled her. So I'm not talking about looks at all. Just the music is fucking fire she is too young for everything except like to babysit because she needs a babysitter i i've listened to good for you that's the only and i heard driver's license good for you to me like i just said i feel i like power more like hayley williams i feel like it's just a bootleg misery business and the only thing i thought was cool have you seen that tiktok where they match up the voices no so it's like uh it looks like a producer screen so you can see like the different tracks

oh and it's so it goes like there's the beat which is very similar on both songs and then it'll play like 10 seconds of hayley williams and then it'll take 10 seconds of olivia rodrigo's lyrics and they're like their voices like she can she can sing as well as hayley williams yeah it's she nails it so to me it's like she's young enough. It's not ripping it off. It's like paying homage to her, you know? So I recognize that she's got a good voice, and I guess she writes these things. So she's like the new Taylor.

And so I respect her. She's the new Taylor, only she's already swearing. She says fuck. Ooh. I mean, that's pretty badass. Get it, girl. This Olivia Rodrigo chick, not to be trifled with. I think my thing is, and it's fine, because whatever, you don't have to be this way,

but when you are writing breakup anthems and you're 15, I just think it's... But people write fictional songs all the time. You don't have to have them done. I think those are the time to write them. Because you're like 15 i just think it's but like people write fictional songs all the time you don't have to like i think those are the time to write them because you're like so young and emotional and stupid yeah like well you break up as an adult whatever dude yeah i guess that's true when was the last time you had like a fucking like well i went through a hundred years ago three years ago it's a long time it's a long time and you're right you're like the voice is different than a breakup obviously but like you know you when you break ago it's a long time it's a long time and you're right you're like the voice is different than a breakup obviously but like you know you when you break up it's kind of like

like when i my last breakup i was like sad in a weird way it's the beer store is the one thing i learned about it yeah but then i like walked out i was like all right whatever that well i almost like i almost would like to get dumped now that i've been through everything i would be i would legitimately be like, okay. No one needs to tell me there's plenty of fish in the sea. I've been around the block. I'm aware. I'll fucking stumble into some more pussy. I would love to be

at a sit-down drinks breakup like you went through. And I would love a girl to be like, we need to talk. And start to stutter and stammer and struggle and start to say it's not you, it's me and all those things and I would be like

we're good, we're good I gotcha, totally understand pineapple, I get it, we're done here and I would love to just be able to letting someone off the hook like that is the nicest thing you could do to someone I did the exact opposite but I didn't realize what would have if I realized.

I didn't realize what was happening. Once I realized what was happening, I was like, oh, I'm just going to get out of here. You weren't being a dramatic bitch. You were just like a confused idiot. Yeah, exactly. I'm not smart. Is this a problem? I would love the gift of, like, I will break up with me for you.

It's the greatest gift you can give someone. I would love to give that gift at any moment. I might just get a bunch of girlfriends just to let them break up with me. Just to be like, oh, you're going to do you can give someone. I would love to give that gift at any moment. I might just get a bunch of girlfriends just to let them break up with me. Just to be like, oh, you're going to do it? Hell yeah. Never mind. We're done. It's fine. Don't worry about it. Except what if they don't break up? Yeah. Now you got a bunch of girlfriends. The worst thing in the world. A bunch of girlfriends.

So, I mean, to me, like, yeah, if you write, if you can write bars, you know, there are rappers who make up stories about being gangbangers who never did it. There people who write you know taylor said she's writing all all of these songs are at least allegedly fictional now right instead of some of them reality yeah so like yeah you can write songs the way you say the way the same way you write stories and screenplays and all this shit but i just think it is funny when i guess it's like i

don't mind people being a fan of her i think it's just weird when we like like if you're a grown adult okay almost we're talking to me right yeah but but i guess more so girls than than you we already know you're ridiculous but i think if like a grown female is kind of like olivia is like talking to me right now it's like it's a child oh yeah like i don't even ever sit down with a 15 year old girl and forget about music if she was just to be like oh my god

I know what you're going through sister that's like when I broke up with Tommy you'd be like shut the fuck up you're like high school breakup doesn't mean shit compared to me but when it's in song form

you're like oh like she's pretty but see I think the opposite I think the high school breakup means more we just went on about this no no no it doesn't well it means more to the person but not the other that's what I think the high school breakup means more. We just went on about this. Well, it means more to the person, but not the other.

That's what I think is weird, that the listeners are like, oh, my God. Oh, yeah. I'm not connecting it to anything or whatever. I'm just rocking out. The only artist who I actually listen to lyrics to tell me. Everyone else, I'm just like. But people are comparing her to Taylor. So I think people are listening and being like, what a great songwriter

and what a great emotional blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And that can all be true. I just think if you take it to the point where you're like, Olivia Rodrigo, I'm going to live by her words. It's like she's literally writing about the time she got her driver's license. You need to reevaluate. But whatever. Bro, that was a big time in my life.

Yeah. The first time I got my freedom, Kevin, come on. What was the first thing you did when you got your license? Did you go somewhere, drive somewhere, do something? I don't think I did. Sickeningly enough, sadly enough, I think we, like, drove to get beer. Really? I was like, well, now we can go to the place where we know they'll sell alcohol and underage kids.

I definitely didn't have, like, a thing I did. I don't know. I remember one time having, like, a panic attack, like, like a thing I did. I don't know. I, I remember one time having like a panic attack, like leaving a friend's house. Cause it was, it was my, you know, that,

that six month window. It's like kind of a permit where it's like, you have to be in by midnight. I believe it is. Ours was nine o'clock. Oh no, it definitely wasn't nine. Maybe it wasn't midnight either.

Maybe it was some, I was just like legit early. It was like, maybe it was nine. I don't fucking know. It was, it was time, whatever the time was.

I was like leaving my friend's house like three minutes late and i was like oh man i'm gonna get pulled over and get arrested never get to drive a car and i was like freaking out but that wasn't the day of or anything like that my buddy uh block had his he was a year like older he had like a late birthday or early birthday however that works so he was like a year older than everyone and like got it on his first try or whatever it was so he had a license like way early you can get on your first try no no i failed so my listen to this my um my i went to uh ironically enough where i live now i went to get my test in mount vernon and uh there it was like kind of known uh like you, so I was like the white boy at, in Mount Vernon and there were these just like fat, nasty old women who wanted to just like fail

people. Right. And so I'm sitting in Mount Vernon and I'm like in the hood and I'm waiting and there's this sweet little old lady. She must've been like a hundred and she was walking towards my car. And all of a sudden, she just went with another woman, and she came in. And I mean, she was just like, let's get this over with so I can fail you, boy. And then I did fuck up bad. There was something.

I fucked up on the three-point turn. But I remember I was rattled once that happened because I was like, I'm failing this shit. So I was like, I had no chance to even pass it once that happened. But I did. I actually longed to even pass it once that happened. But I did. I actually long to one day. I know people don't think I care about anything. And to the extent that's true. But I long to one day not give a fuck to the point of driving instructors.

Like federal employees or state employees, whatever they are, local employees, government employees who just do not give a shit. Bro, I didn't leave the parking lot for my test. So I scoffed at you for not passing. I fucking did a lap around the parking lot. Parking inside a fucking it's the DMV in Fall River is near like a pub 99. So it's

like they kind of like it's like in the middle of these mills kind of right. I just did like a lap around like an abandoned mill and then pulled into like a parking spot. And they're like, you're good. Did you have to drive in the street, Nick? Yeah, it was like a lap around the block pretty much. Really?

You? I did have to drive in the street. I was so nervous when I was taking my test. She told me to take a right. I took a left. Well, that would be like, well, you're an idiot. I don't know if you're a bad driver, but you're a fucking bore. She told me to stop. She's like,

you're doing fine. Stop being so fucking nervous. Then I was fine. That's probably what I could have used for my chicken chips. I think she was relishing the fact. What I did, I can't remember. First of all, they made me parallel park in a pretty tough spot. Usually, everybody that I know, they gave you

an open-ended one where you still had to pull in, but you weren't really biased. I didn't have to do it. I could parallel park with a motherfucker, but I didn't have to do it. Yeah, now I'm great at it. Back then I wasn't. So usually it would be like nowadays you have to park in between here, right? Yeah, yeah. But they would find there would be nothing there.

Okay, I got you. So you just had to be able to pull. And I had to do a real parallel park, which again, I was like probably good enough to do it. But I was looking around. I was like, you're going to make me. Fuck, I wasn't prepared for that. Everyone told me I wasn't going to have to. And then when I did the three-point turn.

You guys call that a K-turn? No, three-point. Three-point, okay. So I pull, I turn, and I stop, right? And then I was so overly cautious that I'm like, let me check both sides and everything. Like, let me resume. And I didn't put it in reverse.

So I quit. I mean, I just went forward for a quick second and hit the break, but she was kind of like, I watched her go like, fucking a, and I think I, I like,

I like rolled the stop sign too. So I, I, you're like a buddy who had, uh, one time called me after you got fired and i asked him well why'd you get fired he's like it's such fucking bullshit man and i was like oh what happened and he's like i don't know man like some shit about me like fucking never being on time and

like never wearing my like dress code and like my numbers not being right my expense account being too high and i was like oh so all the reasons. I did all, I fucked everybody up. This lady was mean. Let me tell you the seven ways I fucked up. But I fucked up because she was mean. And then I was so pissed about that. Then we went, I scheduled one like out in like the sticks of Long Island. Cause like everything nearby was like,

you're not, you know, six months so you can try again. So I was like, what the fuck? So we drove like two hours out to Long Island and it was like, then I finally, you know, six months so you can try again. So I was like, what the fuck? So we drove like two hours out to Long Island. And it was like, then I finally got like a sweet little old lady where I probably could have run somebody over. Whatever, man. Here you go. How funny was that? Like that little window of COVID where I remember everyone in Georgia just got their license and then they tried to rescind it.

No, I don't remember this. They, when like, when COVID was really popping, it was like, you know, we're not, we can't do this. Dangerous to have everyone like getting in and out of cars and all that shit. So they were just like, we issued everyone a license. And then they like the next day, somebody was like, wait a minute. No, that's a horrible idea. And they were like, please come back and give us it back. Like, you know, like we rescind it.

You have to give it to us. And people were like, no, dude. What? I don't even understand. Like, how do you do? Can you just fucking do that over the system i guess like all those things are maybe more like you have to come take it and it was like i don't know i got my fucking license i'm not doing that texas saw that now it's a good idea we should do it with guns good luck with that one yeah we're gonna have a gun we don't care all right today on the show we've got nikki

cass uh you know him from instagram and tiktok he does pasquale with the big italian accents and the the face filter uh just genuinely the nicest kid i've ever met my very very very kind gentleman so so fucking grateful so like everything like doing it like knows exactly what he is and what he isn't where he's going what he's doing uh and i think you know we talk about in the interview like calling him a tiktoker i think when people say like you're a tiktoker there's like a negative connotation and he is like the polar opposite of what you would think of what you think tiktoker so uh a new that's a new up-and-comer i feel like who on the show probably our youngest guest ever, right?

20 years old? We've never had a teenager on the show. Other than maybe people here. We probably had Bob Fox when he was 18, but anybody outside? I don't think any outside. Trevor Wallace, maybe? I don't know how old he is. No, I think he's in his 20s.

He's young, but I don't think he's younger than 20. So youngest guest in KC Radio history. We'll do Am I the Asshole and voicemails of course. First, we're going to do a little more Mayor of Easttown talk because I think I'm officially obsessed with this show. It's brought to you by Credit Karma.

Credit, I saw Light Switch tweeting the other day and he keeps getting emails that say did you know your credit score is absolutely decimated Light Switch tweeting the other day, and he keeps getting emails that say, like, you know, did you know your credit score is absolutely decimated? Like, open this email, and you can fix it.

And he's like, one of these motherfuckers is going to be like, I don't care. I'm not going to do it. But, you know, good luck to Lou. But I think everyone else, I don't think people realize that your credit being bad is a fucking problem until you're buying a house or something, and you can't. It that your credit being bad is a fucking problem until you're like buying a house

or something and you can't. It's like, oh, wait a minute. I have to undo like 15 years of bad behavior. I've been working on it. I miraculously have always had a good credit score when it counted. When I was buying a house or getting a car or whatever, I was always like, here you go.

Really expecting them to be like, you don't qualify. And I think I've always been like in the 700s. And I was like, wow. go. Really expecting them to be like, you don't qualify. And I think I've always been in the 700s. And I was like, wow. Holy shit. I have a lot of... Medical bills don't count though, right? Something like that? I almost tried to give you a real answer.

I once got a bill for one of my, or maybe multiple of my surgeries. And it was something like $199,000. And I was just like, hey, see you later. I'm not going to do that because I just can't do that, so that must not count. Anyway, I've been lucky, but a lot of you out there,

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Just sign up. No credit card purchase necessary. Sorry, no purchase necessary. Exclusions and terms apply. See rules. Banking services provided by MVB Bank, Inc. necessary uh sorry no purchase necessary exclusions and terms apply see rules banking services provided by mvb bank inc member fdic maximum balance and transfer limits apply it's credit karma.com slash win money i um i actually have something to say about the uh it just reminded

me of this is something i saw the other day and the loo thing reminded me. It is, because I thought that was going to be a scam or whatever. It's crazy we just allow scams. Like, how are scams not illegal? Well, I think some of them are. Like when people just call your phone and they're like, you owe us money. Yeah, and it's like, that's a lie. How do people let that person call me?

I think it's kind of a buyer beware, or kind of like, you know, not buyer, but like, you know. But I have so much fucking stuff now that I'm like, maybe? The Coinbase thing, when we were trying to do SafeMoon and all that shit, the Coinbase thing, I was locked out of my Coinbase account

because they had sent me multiple emails being like, you need to verify your identity. And I was like, that seems like bullshit. Right. And so I had to fucking go re-verify and do a whole fucking thing with that. But I wouldn't have ignored that if I wasn't also getting scammed at the same time. If you, so what, let's say you call the police and you're like, open an investigation. I'm getting scammed.

No, I don't think that. You're like, fuck you, man. I think that it should be like... Because we defeated... Like, we defeated robocalls and stuff. Robocalls, yeah. We beat that. A little bit. I feel like it's on the rise. Oh, no, no, that's what I'm saying. We just let it back.

Right. There was a good stretch where it was just like, they didn't exist anymore. I mean, like, what the fuck is the extended warranty thing? I don't know. I mean, what is that? Why is everyone getting that? I get that like three times a day. Like, somebody, like,

I swear to God, the next president, he runs, he or she runs on a platform that I'll stop the extended warranty cold calls. You got my fucking vote. I think it was Trump who brought them back. Motherfucker. I'm not'm not shit about the racist stuff i don't give a fuck about covid you brought back the cold calls fuck you 45 fuck you trump it doesn't make it i'm not 100 positive on that but i'm pretty sure

it's it's just crazy we beat one of the most annoying things in the world and then we're just like yeah you know what they're back because it's been back on the rise in the last four or five years, right? So that would stand to reason that it was a Trump law. But it is like, why are these a thing again? But why has also the Nigerian prince thing, that's been going on forever. There's nobody

who, because that works on old people. You'll hear a story every now and then of someone who sent. The only reason they happen, the only reason they get sent is because somebody out there has got to be doing it. Being tricked, right? So there's not some cyber police division that's just like, take care of that? Or there's just so many of them that they can't stop it? I don't know.

I guess it's like- They're probably pretty focused. The cyber police are probably pretty focused on trafficking. But once or two times a week, I have a nuisance. And I feel like you should probably focus on that first. probably pretty fun the cyber police are probably pretty focused on trafficking but i don't it's a once or two times a week i have a nuisance and i feel like you should probably focus on that first did you see the defy 100 thing no so defy 100 is a coin crypto coin okay now i i think somebody said to me oh yes this might be they got hacked so maybe it's not them doing it but they raised they got like investors or people to spend like i thought they were buying coins 32 million bucks

and then uh they put up like on the defy100.com site or wherever on the app whatever they just put up a thing that said we scammed you guys and you can't do shit about it that's called a rug pull haha all you moon boys have been scammed and you can't do shit about it and they signed it like devson and then it said fuck you moon boys so uh but somebody said to me that that was not real that they were but i don't know either way you know this is the whole thing where it's like crypto is unregulated which is great for like the honorable people but for the scumbags that means we can just be like give us money give us money we're gonna do all this shit with it we're not we're gonna spend it and then i think that's like buyer beware because i'm sure when you sign something

do something give money there's always fine print and it says like there definitely is buyer beware like that's like when i watch wolf of wall street i'm like i don't get what he did he just called people asked for money and they gave it to yes right um but it's different when you're fucking when you're like calling and you're selling me something that's buyer beware when you're calling me and you're telling me that like something i own like a fake and i'm like oh shit okay yes and like the thing is i'm never gonna give those things money so i'm not gonna get tricked but i also might just ignore actual real things yes that. That's what I've done. That's what annoys me. By allowing scams, you're now making me say everything's a scam,

and now I'm missing out on real things. If you called me right now and was like, you need to pay this car ticket fee, something related to my car, or your license will be suspended or whatever, I would be like, okay. I i would fully believe it and i would give you all my money you would right now just because like certain things that that have been real in the past for me if you you know like i've had car issues and fees and tickets and things that's like if you scam me right i might give you money but now i'm gonna be like no no no it's a scam and

some shit's gonna go unpaid for the next fucking 18 months. I have now, I just, one of the reasons I thought of this too is I got an email from my therapist administrators yesterday, and it said the subject line was Capilox. Second attempt, important update. Yeah, I get a lot of that. And I'm still not going to do it because I'm still not fucking sure it's real.

Well, you know what I think I've learned too is that I think that we have grown up in relatively, like, you know, stable and sound financial homes where, like, I have a lot. I've got a lot of shit that's gone to collection agencies. But then the collection agency hits me and I pay it. And I think they're like, OK, that's, like, good enough to not, like, destroy my credit. Whereas, you know, it feels like we're not. I feel like you got it. I think you got to really, really fuck up a lot consistently to really fuck your shit up.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, it's almost like, I can't think of a good parallel, but it's like, we think like, oh shit, I'm late on those bills. Like, there are people who are fucking late on their bills. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There are people who just don't pay their rent at all. There are people who have just been, you know, I'll open up another credit card and the other one, you know, so like even when I think we think we're fucking up, it's like we're still probably in the top percent

of the top half. I would say I got pretty solid. It's kind of like when we're fat and ugly, you know. We're fat and ugly, but we're not fat and ugly. I said this to Rico the other day. I was talking about my kids and I was saying like sometimes I get scared about like, I'm like, you know, growing up, split family.

And sometimes I don't like, you know, I'm like, here's some fucking, have a donut for breakfast and things that I'm not like. I should be cooking them more. I should be raising them better. I should be doing exercise. I wish the family, all these things. And there is a documentary, I believe. I think, I want to say it's Brazil, somewhere in South America. It's about these people,

these babies, these kids. They just eat garbage. They just live on the streets and they literally eat garbage and they are not, you know... But they're fine. They're alive. They're not thriving, but they can survive literally eating just garbage off the street. And I was like, well, you know...

We're doing better than them. Like the muffins from Entenmann's, it's a lot better than the kids eating garbage. I think you dug a hole to put the bar in here. I put it in Brazil with the fucking dumpster. I put it in the landfill. That's where the bar is. The bar is, for all things

in life, the bar is significantly lower than you realize. You can set the bar low, and there are bigger scumbags, worse people, uglier people, broker people, bigger assholes. Everything is lower than you realize. You can put it as low as you want.

Someone's still going to rollerblade under it. You're going to see this video. Exactly that, man. 100% that. But yeah, fuck scammers, man unless unless it's like my scam and then it's like it's naked to make uh mayor of east town man i i don't think i've been obsessed as obsessed with a show and like a whodunit and i mean proof fucking positive to what we've been preaching week to week the week i mean the whole office is buzzing about mary's town today none of

this i talked to you and case jumped in. I walked over. I started talking to Marty. Then I saw Bob Fox was there. I said, Bob, do you watch Mary's town? He said, oh yeah. We started talking. Ken Jack came around. I mean, literally the whole office.

Trent's the only one he's watching it and he hates it. Cause he's like, he's like, I can't like, he's like, he's just Trent. He's so happy. He wants to just watch like Disney plus with Rob. And he's like, I don't know why I watch this show. It is. It's, it's heavy with the trauma point we said that last episode they they want to make sure you are very downtrodden when you fucking finish this so so you said this the other day don't binge them all in a row and that's what

trent had done trent binged five episodes in a day and so um and he was like it was a lot so he texted me what's your theory, right? And that's all me. And then he just responds one more time. And then I just kept going with like my deep theories and just not a single reply. I think when he said, what's your theory, I think he wanted a name. And I was like, who is it? Who is that?

And I think he was just like, this is too much for me. Dude, I don't understand what happened to me. I just can't text like that anymore. Like I had friends texting me. You never really texted like that i i mean there was a time in my life i did and like i i have friends texting me being like what's your thing basically exactly that what's your theory yeah and i'm like i'm basically doing what trent want but me and trent just talk to each other yeah i'm like it's probably billy no no you and trent should just not talk to each other and they're like they're like well why do you think it's Billy? I'm like, I don't know. It just seems like it. Where do you stand on voice texts?

I don't use them. I don't really. I don't know. I'm anti. I think they're going to be what's next. I don't care. It's not like I don't use it. But if you do it, it's not the.

Something like that. What it does, it takes away the fucking like I got my fucking headphones now. Like if I'm in public or if I'm sitting, if you're doing it 10 p.m. and you know I'm on the fucking, like, I gotta get my fucking headphones now? Like, if I'm in public or, you know, if I'm sitting, if you're doing it at 10pm and you know I'm on the couch, fine. Sure. But if it's, like, 3 o'clock in the afternoon, I'm like, well, I gotta go fucking, either go find a quiet room or go get headphones. Well, if it's private or some shit, yeah.

But, like, if I... But I don't like any sound emanating from my phone. I'm, uh... Like that. Does that work like that? Yeah. Yeah. But then, like, isn't it, like, if it... Actually, I think it... Like that. Does that work like that? Yeah. Yeah. But then, like, isn't it, like, if it...

Actually, I think it strictly does that. Is that it? I don't think it plays out loud. Okay, so maybe that's... Let me test it, because I have been getting into it being, like, uh... Things like that, so... So, for something like a long text

that I can be like, it's... John did it because he's actually the father and he's covering it up with the kid. Like, I'll send that, you know. It's a lot easier. See what happens on your phone. All right. Never mind. I fucking hate this. Why?

Because I like the idea of it, Kevin. Oh. Why don't you just fucking call me? We're just going to exchange voice text back and forth now? Is that where society is going? That we're going to fucking send voice text to one another? When we can just call each other

and talk on the phone and it's just faster. Talking on the phone is 100% the fastest and most efficient form of communication and for some reason the world refuses to accept it. I could stand with the texting, but if we're gonna go to voice texting and we're just gonna voice text each other back

and forth, Devin, I'm gonna lose my fucking mind. You're gonna lose your fucking mind? You're gonna? Hang on, let me listen to your voice text real quick. Let's see how this works out. See if you can play it. You're hearing it on your phone, right? But can you do, like, can you play it out loud? No, it was just raised to listen. Yeah, so it is only on your ears you don't have to have headphones and all that

shit makes it even worse kevin because i still gotta hold my fucking phone like this to listen to you and then i gotta do and then i gotta come in here and i gotta do this i gotta send this i think this is a voice text i'm sending to kevin and it's enraging me but i guess we'll just do this and then i'll hit fucking send and you'll listen to it. And I guess you'll fucking send one back to me. That's how this works. So that's why I asked where you stand. We're busy at Die Phone Call.

Yeah, because I like it. That's why I asked where you stand because I want to do it, but I don't want you to do it to me. Because what the difference is, if we're having like a discussion about something I guess if it was like we are guaranteed to only talk about Mayor of Easttown

right now I suppose I will talk to you yeah well you think I'm fucking what else is up well yes that's what most people do I'm this guy that's why i'm pro phone call if i call if someone texted me and said what's your theory on mary v's down first of all that in this day and age does not warrant a phone call you just have to understand the same way

there's the hierarchy you don't you don't facetime you maybe call you're allowed to text you know so if someone says what's your theory of on mary b son and i call them they're gonna be like wait a minute i didn't i don't want we don't have to do a phone call over it right but also if i if i call you if i ask okay if i texted you that uh-huh and you were about to text that slew of blue uh call me and be like all right i got that text all right here's what i'm thinking i'm like oh that is what I do often with that. Either I'm driving or I'll say, this is just a lot easier if I just da-da-da-da. Like, I won't just, like, do it un-fucking, you know, unannounced.

But also, you know, I can't trust these motherfuckers. I give you my theory on Mayor of Easttown, and then you're like, oh, okay, that's cool. Like, did I tell you what happened at work the other day? And it's like, fuck, now I'm stuck on the phone with you. Okay, that's a fair concern. Because these people don't have social couth. You do.

I can trust you. Nobody else. That's a reasonable concern. So how are the kids? I'm not talking about the kids. We're talking about Mary Easttown. Yeah, I know you think that texting is open-ended. I think phone calls could be open-ended.

But even an open-ended phone call is usually capped at 10 minutes. An open-ended text message, we're doing it all day. 10 minutes. But we're doing the text all day, and it takes so long to text now. I don't even know why. I'm just like, that's why I do the thing. I know. That's why I do the phone calls.

It's a controlled phone call. It's a phone call where I have control of what is going to be said and where it's going to stop. Motherfucker, I got control, too. It's an end button. Yeah, well, that's the thing. And it'll just shoot you a text. Sorry, dropped it.

Also, you know what? What's funny is it does this thing where it'll say, like, keep, you know? So, like, it's, you know, it's for, like, you know, I don't want to put this in writing too. It's good for that. Yeah. And then it just disappears. So it's like, but then it says if you keep it, it says, like, John has kept this. So if you're sending some shit, that's either.

You're sending some nasty, nasty. Yeah. It's like, let's say I sent the message where the word gape was involved. And all of a sudden, you know, it says you kept it. I'm like, well, that defeated the purpose of doing it and not putting it in writing what are you gonna do with that oh i got a cameo the other day so you can do this thing uh one day cameo i have a i have a week to do my cameos that's like what i set it at but you can do this thing where if you want someone to complete it in 24 hours because it's their birthday or whatever you can put a premium on it so i put like some extra dollars

on it so it's like worth you know my to like stop what I'm doing and make it. And so this person like up, up, up, charge themselves 50% extra. And they just said it was booked by X and it was two X. Like they want it all to be anonymous. And it just said, say nothing is coming. That's it. Nothing else. No other explanation., say nothing is coming. That's it. Nothing else. No other explanation.

Just say nothing is coming. And I was like, I need to know what this is about. Oh, why? I did that so quick. I mean, I did. Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it.

I did it like I was like an actor. I was like, nothing is coming. Nothing is coming. Nothing is coming. I just did. I was like, I coming nothing is coming nothing is coming i just did i was like i don't know why you want this but here you go there's several choices but i need to know because i started to i was thinking to myself maybe i shouldn't even give you fuckers this idea but like you could get me if somebody just said like you know here like for 100 bucks just say uh like like i disagree and then you put a fucking tiktok out there where it says like you know uh you know uh like black people shouldn't get jobs i i agree i disagree like whatever you

could you could make me fucking into the if you have me my face saying something for real you could do all sorts of shit with that deep fake me or whatever yeah you, for sure. Put me in a green screen background, whatever. Yeah, exactly. Turn me into some fucking... Whatever, I got 50 bucks out of it. That was worth it. My career's over. Anyway, this all started because of Mayor of Easttown,

where I have not been as excited for an ending. We got some buzz going for the undoing, but now, having gone through Mayor of Easttown, I'm like, oh, that ain't shit. Agreed, but also, you know what? I'm going to blame the producers at HBO on this one. Kind of a bullshit setup that the finale's on Memorial Day weekend. I got concerned because I'm lame and don't have plans.

I was like, they're going to fucking push this a week for the kids who are going to be partying. But they didn't. They're doing it on Memorial Day Sunday, which is like, that's when you're fucked up. If you're young and fun, Memorial Day Sunday is when you are fucked up. You've been day drinking for like two straight days. You're taking advantage of the holiday being Monday. It's not even like you're a hungover day. The next day, you're a hungover day.

I remember that the summer of Breaking Bad seasons, I remember being, like, hard for me. I was like, don't day drink. Don't do it. Don't do it. Don't do it. And there would be a couple times where I watched, like, important Breaking Bad episodes kind of fucked up,

and I'd wake up in the morning, and I'd be like, fuck. Dude, I watched, like, not final. You watched Ozymandias fucked up? Oh, Ozymandias? Yes, definitely. I remember I sent a tweet during it. No, not Ozymandias. It was the one where, like, you saw Jesse's pink phone or whatever.

Remember, like, the phone did something? Vaguely. And I was just like, what? Jesse has such a stupid fucking phone. Everyone's like, yeah, it's a huge fucking, what are you, the dumbest person alive? I forget what it was. The Sunday, I think it was Sunday, that Osama bin Laden was killed. And I, like, kind of was, like, of was like bombed and missed the whole thing.

That's my first blog ever as an employee of Arsenal Sports. Was Osama that? Yeah. No. Yes. Yes. In 2000? As an employee, full-time.

Oh, okay. I was going to say, you were around before. No, actually, that was when Manzo went on. That was the first blog Manzo on his honeymoon. So like five days later, Derek Jeter hit the home run? That was like the – it must have been something like that, yeah. It was because I remember like I was getting a ride into New York. I was home that weekend.

Right. And I was getting a ride into Manhattan and like I was close to Manhattan. And then like the killing – it was announced or whatever. And I was like, Mom, get next to a fucking Peter Pan bus. So I can fucking fly this. And then I'm, like, running through the streets. You guys used to legit do that, right? What?

You would drive up on. Oh, I've done that many a times. Yeah. And, I mean, it works. The Wi-Fi is dog shit on the bus, too. But it works to an extent. And, yeah, that was the first blog. Like, Osama bin Laden's dead.

I had, like toby keith like fucking song and shit it wasn't like a huge blog but it was like a blog i posted on my own blah blah blah and that was that sunday night oh by the way uh shout out to the rock we all know his story with osama like it's the greatest display of self-control of all time yeah truly truly but no i i disagree i i couldn't think you would get in trouble for it like it would people would like look down on it no i just think he Because you think he would get in trouble for it? Like people would look down on it? No, I just think he did it perfectly. He didn't announce it, but he was like, I know.

That wasn't I know. You'll find out in a little bit, but I want you to know I know something big. So it's The Rock. He's brilliant at everything. But also, you can't expect everyone to be as savvy as him. But you would expect people to just be like, I know it! So yeah, he did do it perfect, you're right.

But I was fucked up for that, and I kind of was like, I remember being like, what happened here? Like, whatever. We went to bed, we woke up, I didn't know anything happened. Oh, fuck!

And that was back when we had to cover, there was still only a few of us, so missing something big like that was like, I had. We had prom weekend that weekend. So, like, it was the second night of it or something, and everybody was kind of dying down. And ramped back up. Yeah, the parents came in like, we killed Osama bin Laden. And we're like, let's go.

Dude, it's so funny to think about. Like, I mean, obviously, there's no gray area with Osama bin Laden. He's like an absolute bag of shit. But if our president was assassinated and people were partying in the streets over in another place, you know what I mean? I think there's a difference. There's a difference. In their radicalized mind, probably not. But it's like we all were throwing a rager because someone got their head blown off.

America, let's go. OK, finally, America is down here. So we we we kind of handicapped all the possible suspects here. I actually texted Westy, tried to get this on the app. I was like, because I know they had to do it for the Oscars. Who could win things? And that's what he said. He was like, the only thing we would ever maybe do this for is the Oscars.

Otherwise, we can't do this. And then I asked Hank if we could get it on the Play Barstool stream. But apparently, the lead time to do something like that takes months. So I think what we'll do, maybe we'll make a Google Doc. Can you do that for me, Nick? Yeah, we can do a poll or something like that. Yeah, we've done like Death Pools in the past with Breaking Bad and Game of Thrones and stuff.

So we're going to do that with Mayor of Easttown. We'll do like a merch giveaway. You have to like name the person, and then for a tiebreaker, maybe if we could leave like a little, you can like give a little synopsis or whatever. So here's what we got. So we've got Billy right now, who technically has confessed to the viewer, at least.

And so, you know. Not just to the viewer, to his brother. To his brother. It seems like there's... The police are going after him. Some folks out there... I think you believe this, right? You think it's going to end up being Billy? I don't think it's gonna be that clean but yeah i think there's gonna be a lot

of other stuff happening around it but you think he's the one who pulled the trigger i you know i i'm not like i'm not like bet the house on it but i think as it stands i tend to 100 i believe that i believe that admission i'm also having since earlier i was having a little bit of flashbacks to um to the undoing where it's like we told you who it was like like yeah like no we told you last episode who it was like why are you all going crazy about this right billy said it was him he was covered in blood like that's why i had to put him at minus 200 because if if it does turn out that and we had him at crazy odds or it was a long shot i'd be like what do you know yeah i told you it was

him no billy's definitely the minus money again i'm not i'm not fucking taking out another mortgage to bet it's a bet on it but i i think that's the minus money there next up at plus 150 uh is john billy's brother i think the writers are pretty heavily dropping some hints or foreshadowing that he's involved. Yes. If you are just a casual viewer who turns on the TV and just lets it hit your eyeballs, you're like, it's Billy. If you're thinking a step further, they're pointing towards John.

There's definitely some tension in the Ross household. Yes, and there's these scenes with him where he's secretive, and he's, you know, Billy's saying, you've got to take accountability for your life, you know, because you couldn't keep your dick in your pants. He's already having affairs. We're talking about a baby that we don't know who the father is, so there's sex involved.

So John, I think, is next uh logical thought at plus 150 um here's so now we have about i'll stop my head by 12 people here uh i'm gonna throw dylan in at plus 300 because i believe that there that's also a little bit undoing ish where it's like we we investigated him in the beginning the er's father was like, it's fucking Dylan. But did he have an alibi? I can't remember. He did, but it's not true. Right.

He had an alibi, but his girlfriend is like, you weren't home. Right, right. So that's also a thing where I think it's like we had a scorned boyfriend who was raising a kid who wasn't his. His alibi doesn't hold up. A lot of things there. It's a weird thing for like a high school. At first he said he was out on the porch smoking, and his girlfriend was like, no who wasn't his. His alibi doesn't hold up. A lot of things there. It's a weird thing for a high schooler. First he said he was out on the porch smoking,

and his girlfriend was like, no, you weren't. I came out on the porch. And then he, I don't know, I forget if he told her, he told, yeah, he must have told her. Maybe it was the mayor, I forget. But he told someone, this guy went for a drive. Right. Because I was like, high schoolers don't go for a drive.

Try to two in the morning, you know? Dads go for drives. Right. High schoolers are like, all right, I'm going to go for a drive and fucking calm down or whatever yeah yeah his girlfriend said like i rolled over and you weren't in bed so uh dylan at plus 300 here's where we start to get into some curveball territory oh i'm gonna throw in the deacon at plus 400 i don't think he is he's involved but he is he had the bike he he was with her that night. If HBO wanted to come out and say, like, yeah, it was him.

Wait, what did he say? He's dropping her off at the park to meet who? I don't think she told him. It was just like she told him to drop her off at the park. So he still had her bike. He threw it in the river. I do believe, like, I get one of those things where, like, how does a human interact? How does a human act that way?

Like, I get it. Oh, do you panic? Allegations. Yeah, yeah. So he's got other allegations. That girl's dead. He was there. And I got her bike and her DNA fingerprints playing all over the place.

So I'll throw Deacon at plus 400, although I don't think it's him. Here's where we start to get into some of the long shots and the twists. I'm going to throw Lori out at plus 500. I think Lori has been immediately laurie tried to push frank onto mayor i think uh she's either protecting what what the what the the show has shown us right now is she's down she was down to protect billy right she was down to lie and if it's not

billy and it's john i think maybe she could be protecting her husband. Potentially, she finds out that her husband was the father in an incestual affair. She gets mad. Weird person to blame. It would be an odd person to blame. To kill Aaron? Yeah. I just think killing John.

Yes, but also, maybe I could see it being like... But yeah, you've already cheated on me once. Fuck these hoes. I'm angry at you, and also I don't it being like. But like, yeah, you've already cheated on me once. Like, fuck these hoes. I'm angry at you. And also, like, I don't want to kill the father of my son. I don't want to punish him. But like, fuck this girl. Could be a crime of passion. I don't think it'd be a crime of passion.

Where's the baby right now? Dylan's parents are coming, are taking care of the baby, right? Yes. This poor incest baby? Yes. Allegedly, probably. By the way, that's intense. Incest babies, like like short of game of

thrones there's not many shows that like touch that yeah topic so uh good for them uh tied to laurie i think at plus 650 and this is my theory uh this is where i think we're going i think it's gonna be ryan laurie and john's son ross right the ross family yes r, Ryan Ross, I think, is going to be the killer. And I think because there's a couple scenes that just don't make sense unless he's involved. There's the scene where he beats the shit out of that kid with the lunch tray in the cafeteria that I think was there to show that he has some violent tendencies. I think when there's a scene where John Ross is saying, it'll just be our secret, don't worry. I think people are supposed to think that it's his son covering up the affair,

where I think it was a father saying, like, you murdered the girl, don't worry, we'll get rid of the body, we'll take care of the secret. And that's why I think Laurie would be a little more inclined to defend them. When Laurie says things like, what's going to happen to Billy? I feel like it's like they're convincing Billy to take the fall fall for his nephew and they're worried about what's going to happen to billy so they're kind of like thinking through what they're making him do uh now now my my seems to be the role i'm playing here is uh devil's advocate because he always needs help isn't the uh the meet me in the park a bit of an elaborate setup for a middle schooler?

Well, that's why I don't know if it's going to be like he was – I think it could be a – not a mistake, but like he was – like she was meeting her – she was meeting John, and Ryan like followed him out of the house or something like that. Okay. Like I don't think it's going to be he plotted this, like a premeditated, yeah, because that would be tough for a middle schooler, right?

But I think it's going to be wherever, and that's why I think it was kind of messy. That's why I think Billy comes home covered in blood because I think it was like, oh, shit, we weren't planning a murder. We were planning a meetup to be like, we have to meet in the middle of the woods because no one can know that we had this baby together,

but hey, I have to talk to you, and Ryan followed me here and he's standing with with the gun and the gun i believe i think we're all thinking that uh oh let me go through some of the other ones because it kind of points all that so that's ryan at plus 650 uh plus 1000 frank roy from the office um originally pointed out right away We all kind of then trusted his alibi because John was like, look at him. I was with him. He was fucked up. But now if we're going to say that John and Billy are potentially involved or the murderers, being with him is the worst thing of all. Yeah.

And I think he was covered in blood. Right? He kind of came home all, like, fucked up. I don't know if he had blood on him. He had, like, a black eye or something like that. Yeah, so he was all banged up. Also, Frank said, what's her name? Gail Floyd or whatever.

Gloria. I don't know whatever. His fiance's name left. And Mayor was like, why? And he was like, ever since the paternity test that you made me take, things have been bad. So maybe she put together some pieces. And we know that he bought her diapers and he said it was just because like hey i was i felt bad for her but it's like that's

that's a weird thing to do so um far-fetched but i think possible i don't think it's that weird thing to do unless you're like just to buy diapers for a young girl that a kid i don't think it's true i mean i guess it's a nice thing to do. I think it's like maybe Aaron was the biggest, the most extreme case, but there's probably a lot of down-and-out kids in that town. It's like, what are you helping all these kids? You pay for everybody who needs food and diapers and help. But yeah, not too far-fetched, but I think we've seen several other better possible suspects here.

So I'm putting Per at plus plus a thousand um siobhan is kind of gaining a little bit of steam on reddit and on the internet and stuff plus 2500 uh i i think this would if there's any argument to be made i think um it would have to be like a mistake an accident like i don't know how you accidentally shoot someone in the head, but like, what would Siobhan, why would Siobhan do? Yeah. I'm trying to, I think. There's so many people who have such a clear point into like why and, you know, messy alibis

and stuff like that. Like Siobhan. You know what? Let me. You seem to come to her rescue when she got punched in the face. Yeah. And she seems. And then later killed her.

Right. So I think maybe I'll make Siobhan. Here's what I'll do. Siobhan's plus 10,000. Okay. Her ex-girlfriend, I'm going to put her at plus 5,000 because I don't think this is it. But again, everything in this show, every scene and every word and every shot seems to mean something. And we have just been hammering that Siobhan's ex-girlfriend takes

too many edibles, she does too much drugs, she parties too hard, so again, maybe an accidental thing, she's like, you know, too fucked up in the moment but otherwise... The edibles thing is such a weird drug to kill people on though. Yeah. Such a weird drug that this girl's like addicted to.

She's like, I am so fucked up. It really does, and she's puking everywhere and ruining her life, basically, over fucking edibles. It is very strange, but I think that Siobhan's ex-girlfriend, Siobhan's current girlfriend, love triangle thing, I think is just to show,

to have Siobhan be fucked up and argue with her. I think it's just a subplot. And Mare has a fucked up daughter who blames her for the death of the brother and all that kind of shit. So, yeah. And then Richard, the writer, plus 5,000 as well.

I think we all thought that around episode, like, three or four. Like, it's gonna be the writer. Because he was the perfect, like... He's too obvious. I actually never really thought it was him. Me neither. Especially in a small town. There's a death. A new guy comes in. You'd be like, who's the fucking new guy never really thought it was him. Me neither. Especially in a small town, there's a death. A new guy comes in. You'd be like, who's the fucking new guy?

It's him. For sure. The fact that no one was right away like, it's the writer. Yes. I mean, in the show. Why is this new guy in town and someone turns up dead? What the fuck's going on here? He writes about murder.

He's a total loner. Nobody else with him. Have you remembered what his book was about yet no i meant to look into that and his other book is some sort of i think like murder mystery but i don't know the exact specifics of it um and as you said last episode we all thought like it's guy pierce he's been in a few scenes but not every scene which is the perfect like i can't believe it was that guy on the TV show. But then we learned that Guy Pearce was never supposed to be that character. It was supposed to be a bit character.

So it's not going to be him. I think what I was saying is that he's going to write a book called The Mayor of Easttown, and that will be his final contribution to the show. And then the last one here, a plus 10,000. People are saying it's Mare's mom because she – and again, there is a little bit of like a possibility for everybody here. Mare's mom says the gun that was used to kill Aaron, she says that's a gun that your dad would have had. So they could have been in the house. They could have had access to it. Wait, Mare's mom was the one that said that?

I believe so. No? You might be right. Yeah. I think that's why people were saying that because i yeah i remember that line but i forgot mayor's mom said i thought the chief said it the two very different looking i want to say the chief like described it or something but i think because mayor's dad was a cop and she was like yeah that's the kind of gun that like your dad had when he so then i don't think she would so then then uh that's almost like incriminating yeah like why would you even bring that up yeah yeah so like i mean i don't think that's why I don't think she would... That's almost like incriminating himself. Like, why would you even bring that up? Yeah, yeah.

I mean, I don't think... That's why I don't think this is a good... There is... There probably is an old... That random affair scene where the dead woman's husband announces that I had an affair with his mom. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know if that was...

That was wild. Like, talk about the most out-of-place scene ever. But I thought the same thing about the cafeteria tray, and now I'm thinking that actually has a meaning. So maybe this affair means something. I think that was maybe the writers being like, we need to laugh once during the show. Like, not everything can be complete Delco doom and gloom.

So, like, I mean, Kate Winsletstead was like belly laughing in the car afterwards it was like this great moment of levity but um but people are like maybe that is involved the only so i think it's ryan you think it's just gonna end up being billy but like he pulled the trigger but it's because i don't know yeah i think i think that's what's your official what's your official theory my official theory would be billy did it. Billy did it as some kind of... Who's the father? John. Okay.

As some kind of protecting his brother kind of deal. And that's why he's so pissed because he's just like... He lived at home with his dad and he's just like... It seems like he's the brother who wasn't the successful one. And he's like, fine, fuck it. I'll take this ball. I've been doing it your whole life for you. Yeah, I might as well just take the final step.. I've been doing it your whole life for you.

Why might as well just take the final step? Almost like he's doing it for a little extra pity. Like, I'm going to ruin your life by fucking ruining mine. Watch. Yep, I can see that. But that also feels like a pick

where it's like, maybe it's like a divisional round playoff game where you got like a great team versus a bad team. And you're like, this one's probably going to be the win here.

But it's kind of the boring pick. Like, it wouldn't surprise me if there's like I think if it's not Billy But here's my thing What do you think then they're showing? I think that they're showing you Billy but then the chief has that picture or the piece of

paper or whatever and he's like we got to get Mare on the phone. I mean that to me is just saying that we got to tell Mare like it's not what she thinks yeah you know so what what could that be though so you think no that would make sense that so the chief is like it's not billy's baby it's john uh-huh but that doesn't it could be yeah it's my baby but i didn't kill her so that would still hold up with you yeah yeah i i it's it's just and like i think it's gonna be a lot of the messy stuff i think i i don't think it's gonna – I think there's going to be a lot of other messy stuff. I don't think it's going to be like the finale is going to be like kind of wrapping up that storyline. It's going to be we don't know what the fuck is going to happen to Dylan.

I think everyone has something messy to tie up. Well, the thing I can't figure out, there's a lot of little subplots, Siobhan's girlfriend and like what happened with Kevin, Mare's suicide son. But the Dylan thing is fucking me up. Why is Dylan hunting down a girl, putting a gun in her face and saying, keep your mouth shut? You got to be doing some serious...

My first thought was he stole the money from Aaron's for the surgery, and he doesn't want to get caught stealing money. He's taking that too far, where it's like, I'm ready to kill... I'm ready to shoot you in the fucking face if you don't stop talking. That's that's like okay you're tied to this murder somehow and i don't i can't put my finger on what that would be he raised that baby it's not his

maybe he found out that it's an incest baby so he what like why you know like then what but he's got to be involved in something and i cannot figure. Some people said that the Reddit theory was that he is involved in drugs somehow. That one I would subscribe to the most. But that the drugs are what had to do with Kevin's death, so that he's going to be connected to Mare's son committing suicide somehow, that he's trying to stop. Well, I imagine the drugs. I mean, he was an opioid addict, right?

He's addicted to heroin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Usually suicide, that doesn't play a part. And Freddy just overdosed, so was an opioid addict, right? He was addicted to heroin. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Usually suicide, that does play a part in it. And Freddy just overdosed, so maybe he's like, I'm pushing drugs that are leading to death. But also, wouldn't he, like, unless he just, like, is really good about keeping it covered up, he lives, like, so poor.

Yeah, but, like, I mean, like, he does drive a nice car. You're a small-town drug dealer. You're not really crushing it. You're not caking it. Right? Like, and especially if you're dealing heroin. You think you wouldn't be able to pay for your kid's surgery

or maybe he just doesn't fucking care. Doesn't want to. So I think that's the... We'll tweet this out if you want to just look at our made-up odds. But you can give us official predictions. I think it's going to be Ryan killing Aaron because she was meeting up with his dad, who's the actual baby,

and then Billy and John were both there. And that's why they're covered in blood. They're trying to get rid of the body to cover up Ryan. And I think Lori knows that. But this, we have not done on the show in many, many years. And they're all pretty plausible. And I'll be honest, minus, I mean mean there's the silly ones that would be stupid. But like the four or five possibilities, I'm cool with like all of them, maybe minus one.

Like I think all of them are pretty good writing, pretty cool twists, all good shit. So if they stick the landing – if they stick the landing, where do you put Mare of Easttown? It's tough because it's a limited series. But we've seen enough of the True Detectives. We've seen The Undoing. We've seen Big Little Lies. We've seen, like, enough. I haven't seen most of those.

So it's not True Detective. That scene was True Detective-esque. I'll give you that. I think this ending has a chance to be better than True Detective's ending. I think True Detective, because I've rewatched True Detective recently. I think we really were unfair to True Detective. I don't like the very, very end, actually. I think you're right.

That last look at the stars. I hated the look at the stars, and I hated that he had the hallucination thing in Carcoso. He's looking at the fucking... He looks up, and there's this fucking cloud in the sky. I remember that. Yeah, but I think that was just like... Those two things aren't great.

I didn't think that was the... Those two things aren't great. I didn't think that was the time, like the final showdown with the Yellow King, and we're looking at like the universe appears in the ceiling. I thought that was just a weird choice. Yeah, that was... But if they really nailed this, I think this is one of the better, like, oh, I thought it was him.

No, wait, I thought it was her. Wait, it's him. If you change your mind like three or four times in the final two episodes, I think that's some bomb-ass writing. him. Like, if you change your mind like three or four times in the final two episodes, I think that's some bomb ass writing. Yeah. Yeah. I guess I would say this, but the fact that they went to the they took it to an incest level threesome potential, like whatever it is, not many shows touch that subject matter.

So that's like you get bonus points to go somewhere like that. If we're going one season shows, I would probably go True Detective 1, Maniac 2, and that's a completely different show. Maniac on Netflix. That was one of my favorites. With Jonah Hill and Emma Stone. What? What is this? What are we talking about?

It came out years ago. It's like wild sci-fi. It's serious? Jonah Hill? It's serious. It's got wild sci-fi. It's serious? Jonah Hill? It's serious? It's serious? Yeah, yeah. It's got the fucking...

They're like connected in their dreams or some shit. It's like an experimental drug. Oh, I did see this. Yeah. It was like a movie though, wasn't it? No, it was a series. I think I just watched it all in like one night. I loved Maniac.

That was cool. That was cool. I do think that was like a little bit different. It's definitely different. Yeah, it's a little more sci-fi-ish. They're almost like... Justin Theroux's in it, right? Justin Theroux's in it.

They're a part of like a... Coming off leftovers or something. Yeah, that was cool. But I just really liked Maniac. I'm surprised. I thought you would have had a different number one. What do you think we wanted it to be? For you, Mindhunter.

Because Mindhunter's my number one. Mindhunter's season two, though. Huh? I know. Well, you're saying just strictly one season? If we're going either one or an anthology season? But I'm not saying that. I'm saying, like, I think, like, season two of Mindhunter,

I think, is the best there is. Season two is really, really good. So I would go, like, season two of Mindhunter. And then right now, because I don't really love the ending of True Detective, I also, like, True Detective, there was a few things I didn't like about it if they nail this ending I think it has a chance to creep up on True Detective

really? I don't know if I'm ready to give it that it also doesn't have the cultural impact that True Detective True Detective in the office we're loving it and like Twitter likes it sure I mean I would never argue that we were doing a weekly podcast with True Detective sure and that like there's no denying that.

But that also doesn't necessarily just mean it's like... That was because we had never seen something like that. Now, the fact that Kate Winslet does this is as crazy as Woody and McConaughey. And Winslet's fucking awesome. We were all surprised by McConaughey and Woody. Whereas Winslet just came in and did the damn thing on a television show. And she is incredible.

Jean smarts, like a more of a big character, but she's awesome. Like there's some heavy, heavy hitting acting in this as well. But I think I would, I would probably still end up going, it'll probably end up still being mind hunters.

He's in two for me, true detective season one. And then maybe this, but it's, but it's just like when that final season, that final scene of episode five happened. And I was talking about just that scene. Everyone was like, dude, like this is not on True Detectives level.

I was like, I'm not saying that. I'm saying the scene is. But now the way this is unfolding, I think it's getting into the conversation of the whole picture. I think the story, maybe not that way. Like Rust was like he's the best like character in all of this shit, I think. So like that can't compare. But the actual whodunit and what ends up happening is some really fucking bomb ass storytelling in my mind. I agree.

The other guy that was just like a little detour that was awesome and coming back like it's fucking dope. I agree. I think there's a little recency bias to it. It's like I love this show. I think there is a bit there i remember there was one time we got in an argument you know an argument like this uh about it was fucking making a murderer and then there was a new murder documentary out and you were like it's just as good and i was like there's no way this is just as good and it was i don't remember the

name of it anymore. Was it Staircase? No, it was the one with the fucking, the guy with the fucking. Oh, the pizza bomb thing. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, we don't remember the name of that show anymore. Right, right, right.

But it was like, this is just as good. I was like, it's not. Because it also, like, Making Murder had that. But I also didn't like Making a Murder. Also. Making Murder had, like, that cultural thing, too. And they're both great. Actually, I didn't really care for that other documentary.

But these two shows are both great. Making a Murder and Mary B. Stown. I also think I came in thinking this is going to be the undoing, and it's going more the direction of True Detective, so I'm pleasantly surprised as opposed to being let down. So that all kind of plays into it, too. But give us your theories. Let us know what you think.

Now I'm going to do Am I the Asshole? It's brought to you by Movement. You're an asshole if you don't get yourself a movement watch. You're an asshole if you don't get yourself some movement shades. And you're specifically an asshole if you don't get these shades. My boy Rory Kramer, I believe is his name. Let me double check that for sure. Rory is the one who designed these.

And he is, when I wore these in my um in my one minute man the other day yeah Rory Kramer he's on uh Instagram he's a photographer and a designer dude is cool as fuck like just is like that dude where it's like yeah you not only would you design these shades but you can wear these and pull them off he's got like long like blonde surfer hair his whole instagram thing is like the polar opposite of my life he's just like cool as shit so uh you got guys like that honestly like you look at his instagram i don't know if you can even see it but it's like this dude is just like the kind of guy he's taking pictures of bieber he's rolling with like the most important guy i mean he's like bieber's like personal photographer some shit like that uh skateboarder. I mean, he's like Bieber's like personal photographer or some shit like that.

Skateboarder, surfer type guy. He's designing movement stuff. So you know you're gonna get some cool ass shit like these flip ones. I think I'm gonna go with one down, one up. I think that's the look. I'm sure Rory's like, take these fucking off. I don't want you. I want like a cool kid wearing these. Not you, dad.

But movement's got the shades. They've got the watches. All affordable. The watches start at just $95, nothing over $130. I think the shades start at like $50, $60, whatever. Now, designer sunglasses are like $300. You sit on them, you lose them.

Designer watches are like $500. No reason to do that. You can get quality materials, quality style, all at an affordable price. And right now, when you go to MVMT, like movement.com slash KFC, you get 15% off today, plus free shipping and free returns. I think Movement was the first people to take out all the vowels that I can really pinpoint. Really? What other brands precede them?

They've been around for a while now. I think Brixton was the one I always thought of. I don't know that one. But me, I just saw that on a buddy's shirt, so I don't know if that's it. Movement's been doing it for a minute with us, so go get them and get the Rory Kramers. They're legit.

MVMT.com slash KFC. Can I say something? I walked in on a tail end there. Yeah. I think that we as a people, we got to stop saying, oh, you because you always lose your sunglasses. You do. You just lost your sunglasses. I found them. But you lost them. I lost them on Frank's desk.

You just lost your sunglasses. But the reason I'm saying it is because I think that just makes it acceptable. Whereas if we all just stop saying it and we're like, let's not lose our sunglasses. I think it's a thing for a reason. Because people are just like, ah, I lose my sunglasses. I don't try to lose my sunglasses. I don't want to lose them. I never say to myself.

But somewhere deep in your mind because you always say it's okay. It's okay. Every time I do, I'm like, fuck. I think it is. I think it is. There's a reason why it happens. It's because you wear them out, and then you're drinking and shit. You wear them out to the beach, but then you go to the bar.

You wear them out, and then you're in a place where you don't need to wear them anymore. So you put them down. You put them in your pocket. You sit on them. You leave them with someone. They're the most losable things in the world. They are losable. I think they would be less losable if it was.

Because I think you're just convincing your subconscious like who cares your sunglasses we lose them all the time that's what everyone does i think if it's like hey you know what this summer summer 2021 we're keeping track of our sunglasses the reason why i like movement is because they make them affordable so you just buy like three pairs for the price of normally one and then it's like i lost those yeah but you can get three pairs and just not lose them yeah well that would be the ideal thing. But you're going to. So let's just.

You're going to. Summer 2021, we're not doing it. Not doing it. You will lose your sunglasses from now until the end of time. No. If you're listening to this, your grandma is dead and you lost your sunglasses. We have some doozies for M.I. The Asshole.

We're going to rattle through them because we got a bunch and I don't want to miss any of them. But we could be here all day going through some of these situations uh we'll start with um this is one that i i found a little while ago i recently discovered i 35 female recently discovered that my husband 25 males got 10 year age difference with the girl being older so you already know red flags has been photoshopping my face onto porn he thinks i should be flattered but i can't help but feel like i'm violated um i've been married two years recently found out that my husband has been making images where he photoshops my face onto porn scenes he also has made some where he photoshops semen onto my face. This made me feel really violated and used.

He thinks I'm being silly, and it's a compliment. He says he thought I'd like it, and he's upset that I'm angry about it. Maybe I'm the asshole here. I don't know. Too long, didn't read my, yeah. Also, as like a little follow-up, I saw one not too long ago that was like a husband, a wife put together that the husband has been reenacting

porn scenes with her. It would always be like, hey, why don't we do it in the kitchen? Why don't you do it like this? Why don't you do it like that? She went to his computer and found a folder of porn, which is always like... Psycho stuff. If you have downloaded porn, you're either

Pirate Simon or you're like Barrett from Subway. But she opened it up and was like, wait a minute. That's like in the kitchen. She was wearing black lingerie. They did it like this. And like he was recreating it. This is literally deep fake Photoshopping. I love this guy.

I was about to say it's tough to side with him on this one. Here comes John. I love this guy. Photoshopping come onto your girlfriend's face is a tough one, John. Well, I'm picturing like Perez Hilton used to do. Yeah, just drawing it. Like it's just a white fucking line. I'm picturing it for real. I'm picturing it like

he's like zooming in and like just gently putting strokes on her face. I'm picturing Perez Hilton just like oh look, it's Bradley Cooper on the red carpet. He's got cum on his face. Fuck Bradley. Wait, he used to just draw the dick, like, pointing at his lip? Yeah, yeah, he just had, like, cocks in your mouth and stuff. It was...

It was wild. But, now, here's the thing. I'm not siding with this guy for all the reasons. Obviously, this guy's the asshole. Yeah. But I want to know, is this motherfucker dragging off the still images? Well, that's what... Or is he, like, a fucking CGI Zack Snyder fucking dude?

So as I was reading this, I thought it was going to be the one I saw where they were reenacting the scenes because that's at least I don't know. I think the scene thing is a little more reasonable than pictures. I agree. Because pictures What? Yeah, I haven't come to a picture. I don't know if he's jerking off.

Probably pretty recently. I like that you caught yourself. Yeah, probably pretty recently. I think we used to talk about it all the time. You'd stop off at the gas station and buy a magazine. Yeah. Oh, Kevin, that was in college. Fucking jerked off to a picture probably yesterday.

You haven't bought a magazine since college? Oh, you're saying let's stop it off at a gas station. I was thinking bodega. Bro, you've been in my apartment plenty of times, right? You know that liquor designing room table or coffee table I have? Yeah.

Probably top off that thing. Fill the porn. You're a poor girlfriend. You're a poor girlfriend. I know what you're talking about. Yeah, of course. You all know what I'm talking about. You've all been in my apartment.

It's my coffee table. you lift the top of it it's filled with porn I need you to send me a photo of that that is absurd you just have porn in your living room like you're a swinger in the 70s every time someone comes over they leave and we look at her like

they didn't open it because it's hard in the 70s? Every time someone comes over, they leave, and we look at her like, well, we look at each other like, they didn't open it. Because it's hard, because we got laptops on it and coffee table books, so you got to take a bunch of things off the top. When was the last time

you took off the top to get the material out to like... Oh, I've never used it to jerk off. Yeah, that's what I mean. I just buy it because it's funny. I've never jerked off

to one of those magazines. If it's all for fun, you should just put sex toys in there, too. You should load that chest up. You should put fucking dog collars. You put everything in there so that if somebody ever finds it, they're like, what? When I say full of porn, by the way, it's not to the brim. Oh, no, there's probably.

How many? I guess 20 to 30. Oh, my God. Maybe 10 to 25. Maybe I'll change it there. That's a radical difference. 20 to 30 to 10 to 30? Oh my god! Maybe 10 to 25. Maybe I'll change it there. That's a radical difference. 20 to 30 to 10 to 25? Not really. 10 to 25? You're talking two and a half times. I'll go 15

to 25. That's a lot of porn. That's a lot of porno magazines. I've flipped through them all once. I've never jerked off to them. Are they Playboys? All kinds of stuff. No, there's hardcore in there. I don't think there's any Playboy. I think it's pretty largely hardcore. Got some obese ones.

I bought the funny ones. Mature? You got any grandmas? Definitely. You know what's funny? When you see the porns where they're taking the pictures and they're just like, you know, there's a girl just like posted up and she's got like two dicks in her and she's just like and she's just sitting there. The in her and she's just like yeah and she's just

sitting there the guy's laying there dick is just in the butt he's not thrusting he's just sitting there with a dick and an ass right here on his dick he's like did we get the shot did we get it it's crazy and a fucking indian sunburn so uh what are we saying about this guy though like i think asshole and probably needs to be like reported to the police. Yeah, yeah. If you're... Is she...

Oh, wait. He's photoshopping her face on. Yeah. It's just... What do you think about that? People will go to those kind of lengths to come blow my mind. Just fucking come, man. Just go fucking come.

And the words of Final Bride, come! Just go fucking come. Don't, like... Does that really get you off that much harder? Are you fucking hitting the ceiling because it's your girlfriend's face? It's just fucking, you're a psychopath. I don't think it's weird. I remember in fucking Best Man.

What's the one with Jason Segel and Paul Rudd? The Lovey Man? No. Is it? Yeah, I think you're right. I think it is The Lovey Man. He's like, you jerk off to your girlfriend? That's weird. I don't think that's weird.

That's normal, but to fucking take the time to Photoshop your girlfriend's face onto a porn star is... I do believe... Bro, just go fuck her. I think... That's mega sex tape.

So, what you're saying, is you're assuming everyone, like, is in a happy, healthy relationship where they're fucking each other and stuff. Like, when, I think when people say, like, you jerk off to your girlfriend, that's fucking, are you crazy? It's because there's a lot of people who, like, hate their girlfriend or their boyfriend and they're not, like, attracted to them anymore. So it's, like, a foreign idea. I think the same sort of thing of like, just go fuck her, it might not always be in the cards. You might have a girl who's like, oh, I'm tired, I got a headache,

all that kind of shit, and he's like, push to these lengths. Well, yeah, but they'll just jerk off to a porn star. Yeah, that's where I think the answer comes in. But that's why, okay, you know what? Guess what, bro, by the way, a porn star is probably hotter than your girlfriend. Yes, that's why.

This is flattering. I think that this guy's a great boyfriend. I think he's like, you know what? You don't put out enough. We don't have a great sex life. So I got to jerk off to weird stuff. But I still love you. And I want to jerk off to you. So I'm putting your face on fucking Layla Starr's body.

Ooh, hello. It was your birthday the other day. What? I think it was. Why do you day what? I think it was why do you know that? it's on Instagram are you following on Instagram? I think so

I don't think I do or is it maybe on Pornhub? I have a chocker on Pornhub what you go to her Pornhub page a bunch of fucking balloons come out? Pornhub I gotta like mute

Pornhub I gotta area just it's too distracting of an account to follow. I open up Instagram. I'm like, oh, I got to like post something on – oh, there's fucking Pornhub. Yeah. Well, I got to go jerk off then. Yeah, I got to take a break now.

So I think this guy is actually romantic. I think he's a creep, but he's romantic, and he's trying to be like faithful to the max. It's like I don't even want to jerk off to other girls. I can't. What do you think about the guy recreating the scenes? Recreating the scenes? I don't think that's... I think that's fine.

I think that's... Bro, I used to recreate scenes all the time when I was a kid. Go in the backyard, fucking play some football, like, oh, it's the last fourth quarter. Make a touchdown. I fucking used to jump off my roof and fucking recreate action movie scenes.

Recreate scenes, that's part of the lifeblood of life. Yeah, I agree. That was a cool thing. I want to do that cool thing. I think that it's a little bit weird when you start doing stage blocking. Yeah. I think if it's like, yo, I watched a scene the other day where I was the pizza delivery man or whatever. You want to do some shit like that?

Fine. When it's like, okay, you have to be wearing red. Yeah, matching up the outfits is a little then it's it's a little bit much um should i 22 year old female tell my best friend 23 year old male i've been catfishing him technically it's not a catfish in the traditional sense let me start from the beginning so when i was a kid in grade school i remember all the adults would tell us that when using the internet you should never give out your personal info i personal info. It was hammered into us as a kid. I internalized it and used the internet. When I would go on online forums, I would always lie about my age, my face, my name, my race, all that shit.

Yeah, you're a person. We get it. Yeah. I never used my own picture. I never used someone's picture as mine. Anytime someone asked for my photo, I would just say, oh, I really don't take pictures or my camera is bad. Basically, when I was 10, I joined an online forum and did the same thing. Made friends.

I always lied about my age, said I was older, name, race, everything. Eventually, in this forum, I ended up making a pretty regular group of friends. They would consistently be – I would talk to them, play games with them. We got really close. Over the course of years, we drifted apart. But me and this guy were one of the few few who consistently stayed logged on for years we grew really close he'd tell me about his personal problems i'd tell him about mine we never talked on the phone just consistently on the site that there this was a

platonic relationship platonic friendship uh never romantic went on for eight years eventually we stopped talking because we're both in college yeah Yeah, it's just starting so early, you know? Yeah. But we were too busy to log in. I never fully quit the game. We'd just log on less and less. Every time I'd log on, I'd see a comment from him. We'd comment back and forth. Fast forward to college.

My sophomore year, I'm sitting in one of my classes, and I notice him. Yes, him from the game. I know what he looks like because sometimes people would post pictures of themselves on their profile. I never did it when they asked me what I looked like. I'm literally in disbelief when I see him. So fast forward, I went all sophomore year not talking to him because I was just

weirded out by it. By junior year, both of us had joined organizations where we see each other frequently. We hung out, became friends. It's been three years. Now I'm starting to consider if I should go tell him that I'm the same girl he used to talk to. Yeah. These people are wackos.

Oh, I got no problem here. What's wrong? I guess it's... I guess not. I guess just having internet friends is just a thing now. Yeah. I got no problem with this. I think this is almost like a fucking modern version of the Pina Colada song. Now, what?

It's just like two people who didn't know that they were together. They were into each other. Is that what the Pina Colada song's about? Well, it's about cheating on your wife. But then they both realized, like, oh, I didn't realize you liked those things. I didn't realize that was you in that one ad. I didn't realize. Because they like Pina Colada.

Yeah, and making love in the rain. Making love in the rain the rain um right oh i thought that was always just like i'm getting caught in the rain i thought that was always just like i want to fuck someone else who's not my wife who's like into all these things that i'm into and then it turns out it was his wife who wasn't all those things oh so it's not a song about cheating and they're both trying to cheat on each other and then they meet up and it's like oh my god I didn't know it was you wow really so the whole thing is about I'm about to go meet up with this girl to fuck her

and she's about to go meet up with this guy to fuck her and then they meet up I did not know this what happens when that happens you show up and you're like you bitch and he's like you asshole but we're in love! In the song, it was...

They fuck each other? Yeah, I didn't know it was you. And it was, what is it? But I never knew that you liked pina coladas. It was like, they're kind of passionately talking about it. I didn't realize that you liked the things I like. Clearly, we have some miscommunication. And they stay together?

I think it's like, listen, we're both scumbags who would cheat on each other. So we should just call it quits here. The ultimate, like, that's the number one, I'd say. We should do a top five of this maybe next week if there's enough songs to think of. The number one you think the song is by somebody and it's not. Everybody thinks that's a Jimmy Buffett song. Yeah, I guess. But I think that's a full circle on that. Rupert something. Where, like, everyone thought it was a Jimmy Buffett song. Yeah, I guess, but I think that's a full circle on that.

Rupert something. Where, like, everyone thought it was a Jimmy Buffett song. Everyone goes, it wasn't. Now no one thinks it's been a Jimmy Buffett song. Right. But, I mean, that's the ultimate, like, everybody has. It's like when you find out that some people sit down or stand up and they wipe. What?

That realization when you find out that's. The Pina Colada song is not Jimmy Buffett is a wild one. Yeah, I mean I guess the problem here is not – it's not all the other shit. It's that you had a window. It's like when you forget someone's name. Yes, yes, yes. You have a window to be like, what's your name again? And if you don't do it then, now we're beyond that and I should know your name and now I'm the asshole.

But actually, no, I disagree again because she kept her distance. She just said from a distance. And I just did organizations. So he could just – she could just be like, oh, I disagree again because she kept her distance. She just said from a distance. And I just said organizations. So she could just be like, oh, it's you. And he might be like, we've been in class all these years. We'd be like, oh, I'm sorry. I zone out when I'm in class. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you might have seen me all those years.

I didn't see you until we were together. And it's like, yeah. I think it's quite romantic. I think these two should get together. But also, she said she's lying about her age and her race and everything. Who likes what they race? There's an update on that one. If I remember correctly, she ended up talking to him and telling him that she knew who he was.

And they ended up becoming good friends. And then she ends it with an update that's just like, and before anybody says, I just like him as a friend. She's like, let me just put that quantifier out there like well that then you and then you know what how the fuck you just like him as a friend yeah i don't know is he ugly is she ugly someone's got to be ugly here like that's just like if you you've been intimately involved with this person for a decade if they're even remotely attractive you want to fuck them. That's when I write.

It's literally the last line of the edit. She's just like, and before anybody says you're shipping this, like, no. I'm like, Jesus. All right. I think she's ugly. Here's it. Somebody said lying about who you are online was not that big of a deal. But once you realize you knew this guy in real life, pretending you didn't know him from the forum and injecting yourself into this life and still lying again.

Now, then you kind of did double down and now it's tough. It is. It's strange. But I could get. You can get. You can dig your way out of this. I could. Yeah, I could.

You could definitely. I would forgive. Like, you were nervous. You didn't know. I get it. Like, it's fine. Lying about your race is weird, though. Lying about your race is real weird.

Yeah. I don't know why it's so weird, but as someone who lied about their sex and their age and their location... You're like a 10-year-old white girl from San Francisco and you're like, hi, I'm an 18-year-old black girl from Miami. It's just like, what? Why'd you do that?

But I don't know. I guess you're just living out a fantasy. You want to be something else. I'm trying to be something I'm totally not, so I'm also going to be... It's a situation that's already weird weird but somehow you made it a little weird i don't know what i don't know what fucking weird fetish you're playing into but it's like yeah there's something a little off about you speaking of injecting i just saw that where they're injecting yourself did you see there's uh lana lana roads was talking about um the injection she got in her ass. No. She went to Atlanta and got, like, oil, like, injected.

Okay, do you want to know, like, the progression of my ass? Yeah. So, first was the BBL. Did absolutely nothing besides put marks on my body. Super bad. I do not recommend it if you're a skinny girl second i flew to atlanta georgia with my friend stephanie at the time and we got illegal butt injections in a hotel room oh my god we flew to atlanta but we went to somewhere called alpharetta stayed at like a motel seven something like that um a woman came with like giant horse needles and a jug of silicone it was literally like a huge jug it was like oily like oil but it was silicone and horse needles like this big i think i already said that and she'd be like no

painkillers nothing and she'd like just lay on the bed and then she'd put little dots on her butt where she was going to inject it. And I'm talking about maybe 20 injections with this huge horse needle. And you'd just sit there sober with her every night. Sober. I do remember. Do you remember a phase where all of a sudden her ass was gigantic? She went from a hot chick to all of a sudden fat. Fat.

I was like, what is it? Because she had a fucking horse needle and silicone jammed up there. She went from like a hot chick to all of a sudden like fat, like fat. Yeah. Because you had a fucking horse needle and silicone jammed up there. But it's also, I feel bad for chicks, normal girls. Like I always say, you know, you're not ugly or hot, you're rich or poor. Like, you know, it's like if you're not getting fucking horse needle injections, you can't keep up. Like if you've got like a regular nice ass, be proud, because the bomb ass that you see on Instagram will probably get people jamming needles this fucking big into you. They've got to keep up with so much.

There's no equivalent for guys other than, I guess, steroids. But it's like, nobody's doing steroids to look good. No, you're doing them to perform at a high level. You're what? You're doing them to perform at a high level. Back to M.I.D. Speaking of steroids I guess not steroids maybe testosterone

Elliot Page shredded I saw that I was like yo I want to look like Elliot Page Elliot Page is jacked do you think that was just like she's just working out or is that like

testosterone injections? I would have... That has to have some testosterone. He had fucking abs popping. Fucking veins popping. His arms weren't as big. Whatever. No big deal. Elliot might want to mix in a curl

or two, but the abs were fucking on point. I would trade bodies with Elliot Page right now. I am not even remotely joking. Not at all. If I were you, I would not trade. You wouldn't trade bodies with Elliot? I would.

See, never mind. His arms are too skinny. Those arms are too skinny, but for me, I'll take it. Elliot Page has a fucking rip pack. That's not a six pack. That's like an eight pack. And they're big muscles. They're individual, like, muscles. Yeah, my guy's jacked up.

He's got a core, man. I want to get fucking, who was it? Who was the fucking, like, the ESPN analyst who used to do jacked up? Oh, yeah. Like, it was fucking Chris Carter. No, he can come on, man, right? Was it Ray Lewis who did jacked up? I forget. No, Ray Lewis was jacking people up. Yeah, he can come on, man, right? Was it Ray Lewis that did Jacked Up? I forget.

No, Ray Lewis was jacking people up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know, but Elliot Page is jacked up. What did the caption say on that one? Anything? Trans babies for a swimsuit. Oh, yeah, that's what was funny. The headline was like, Elliot Page wears swim trunks for the first time.

It was like, Elliot Page is shredded. Like, newsflash, women wear shorts too. They're just shorts. You know? I get it. You used to wear a female bathing suit. Now you're wearing a guy's. Elliot Page got to fucking trap us up a little bit.

Oh, fuck it. You want to get trapped? You want to get trapped? Who wants to get trapped? I want to just go fucking bro out with Elliot Page. Fucking like hit the gym with like a fucking gallon of water. Yes, I want to have the milk. Hit it!

I want a spot. I want Elliot Page to spot me. Like, come on! Come on! You got this! Big explosions, baby! Let's go! I want to go work out in fucking Bryson DeChambeau's garage with fucking Elliot Page.

There's a bunch of bros walking around shirtless like, let's get it. Let's get it. I want to like box with him. I want Elliot Page. I want to like punch him in the ass. Like, more. Come on. Hang him with the legs up.

Just throwing a medicine ball at me like, let's fucking do this. Let's do it, Elliot! I want to do those old Babe Ruth exercises with Elliot Page. Bring her legs back and forth. Throwing the ball at her. Pushing each other around. I want Elliot to be my motivation.

I'm going to put the Elliot Page picture up on the wall and be like, that's the after. This is the ideal male body. That's going to be my after picture, too, okay? Fucking inspirational out here. Good. All right, one more.

Am I the asshole before our voicemails? Johnny, let it rip. All right. Am I the asshole for making my wife choose between me and her best friend? I, male 36, am preparing for my upcoming surgery. I'm sorry, real quick. Do you think that the audience can hear these fucking chairs? I was just wondering that myself

I mean, they're just the creakiest chairs Yeah, they can hear that I hate that chair so much I apologize, people We're probably not going to get the chairs I was going to say, we're not going to do anything about it But I will apologize I'll look for some WD-40 or some shit

That's supposed to fix it, I think. Yeah, I can't wait to see Nick in here like the fucking Tin Man on Wizard of Oz. Yeah, right. They're going to fix it or break it more, so. Okay, go ahead. All right, I, male 36, am preparing for my upcoming surgery at the end of May.

I have a respiratory condition that I have been suffering from, and my wife has been very supportive and accommodating of all my needs. She has endured so much by shouldering this burden with me, and I can never describe how supportive she's been with everything that's going on with me. The problem is that her best friend's wedding is at the end of May, specifically on the 27th, and my surgery takes place on the exact same day.

Now, the 27th was not the original date of her friend's wedding. It was supposed to be on May 18th, but got changed. Her friend informed us about it, but on short notice. And my wife wanted to go, but it's an eight-hour trip since the wedding will be held in the groom's hometown. My wife and I discussed this, and I bluntly told her that I needed her there for my surgery. She told me that that's her best friend, and this will hopefully be her only wedding, and she wanted to attend. She asked if I could get a friend as my support, but I just didn't think that was right.

I didn't think this was right. I was even puzzled that she asked me to get a substitute while she goes to her friend's wedding. I asked if her friend's wedding was more important than my health. She argued that there was nothing wrong with it, and I wouldn't need her since the medical team will take care of me. Then she said that by refusing, I was making her choose between me and her best friend. We went back and forth on this argument, and was, she wanted to attend her friend's wedding. I told her she was being unreasonable and I never expected her to prioritize. And I never expected her to prioritize a wedding over my health.

She loudly yelled, what do you want me to do? I might lose my friend over this and then stop talking to me. I think I handled this badly and acted ungrateful mayor, but I think she's the one who doesn't understand the difference. It's my surgery is an emergency. And if her best friend is a good friend, then she's understand,

right? I'm going to let you go first i think you can't change the wedding the date of the wedding on like short notice like that that is rather bizarre i will admit that so i'll say this if if you are having a wedding that is so change the dateable, it's got to be kind of like a small affair. You know what I mean? You can't just like, you don't have some grand wedding hall, wedding venue, and like the church that you love. This sounds like a Nate Bargatze family wedding. Yeah, it's like you come over to the backyard. Like, oh, you know what?

Instead of doing it next week, we're going to do it this week because it's going to rain. Right. And then in that case, it's like I scheduled my fucking surgery, you know, to this meeting because nothing was going on. But, well, and she's the maid of honor. I think I said that before, but I don't think that makes a big difference, too, though. I think if she is like in the wedding and not even just in the wedding, if she's the maid of honor and she they pull the rug out, and they're like, actually, surprise, we're going to do it this weekend. As a maid of honor, I think you still have to try to make it. And we have to know what kind of surgery.

Like, respiratory surgery does not sound like anything that could be pretty cosmetic. Like, pretty, not cosmetic, but minor. I think... What's a minor surgery in your lungs? I think you're just getting some polyp scraped off. Yeah, they fucking just kind of go with it, so it depends on if it's like, it doesn't sound like

he's not getting fucking his chest ripped open. Yeah, so he's actually really going to like the dentist almost. Yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah. It's a fucking outpatient surgery. And you know what? I will say, if, because I've had,

I've had a bunch of surgeries and I remember on, on the last one, on the last couple being like, you guys don't have the cup you know like my parents want to be there if my i think like my brothers and my brother's sister would come at one point i was like there's nothing you guys could do my you know my last two surgeries both times i was like no i'm good well i had one i might like if i need to get home and

i'm on anesthesia you can pick me up and when i'm when i'm at home if i need like some help in bed or whatever but like when i'm at the, if I need, like, some help in bed or whatever. But, like, when I'm at the hospital and there's nurses and doctors and shit who are, like, there to do that, you can come hang out, but don't feel like you have to, you know? So I changed my mind.

That's my point, yeah. I hate when people are like, are you gonna go visit the hospital? There's nothing I can fucking do. Right. Like, if there was something like... Yeah, I'll go visit you. If you're on an extended stay, yes, I'll go fucking hang out with you.

If you were having cancer and you were getting a dangerous surgery and you were nervous and God forbid, maybe you could die on the table or right out of surgery, you needed support, that's also kind of different too. The idea that you're there for

like, you know, I tore my ACL. I'm getting knee surgery. It's like, what the fuck are you doing here? When I was in college, I had a shoulder surgery and I was in Florida. I was like a sophomore in college. My mom was like, I'm coming down. I was like, you're not coming down. There's no fucking need for you to come down. I was fucking, my roommate

dropped me off. My roommate picked me up. I'm fucking easy peasy. I had a surgery. My dad was like, I'm going to come in with you. I was like, no, I'm good. I'm fucking – my roommate dropped me off. My roommate picked me up. I'm fucking easy peasy. Right. Same thing with – I had a surgery. My dad's like, I'm going to come in with you. I was like, no, I'm good. I'll fucking – he's an outpatient. I'll see you later. Yeah.

Come get me in four hours or whatever. Although I think the post-op, you being down in Tallahassee at Florida State post-op after surgery, maybe not the best idea. Why? Without mom. Fucking awesome. Yeah, well, that's what I mean. For you, it was awesome. Your mom

would be like, what could go wrong? My son, fresh off surgery, bunch of drugs, in a frat house, whatever. Who cares? I had that surgery on like a Saturday. I woke up on Wednesday. Just kept rolling off the couch, taking a pill. I think, yeah, so final answer.

Final answer, she goes to the wedding. Go to the wedding. I would explicitly tell you, go to the wedding. I'll have my brother come get me. Go to the wedding. But that's fair. If you are in a relationship and someone says, like if you're going to be a little bitch about it,

and you say, I want to go to the wedding, I want you to be there at the surgery, sorry. You know, sometimes it's like, I want to go to the wedding. I want you to be there at the surgery. Sorry. You know, sometimes it's like, like, I would hope I would. I would intentionally. I would get a cosmetic surgery. I was in a fucking relationship like this. I get a cosmetic surgery to tell you, go do something. Don't come to this.

This won't be fun for you. Go do whatever you want. Just in case at some point down the line. It happens. They have a surgery. Yeah. You can play that card. Yeah. Come on on we've already been down my teeth clean that one i think what's what sucks and this is ultimately why relationships uh suck and why they can be a

problem there's what's right and what lot and what's logical and there's what you should do in a relationship and a lot of times those two things do not match up. Yeah. Like what's logical? Like, yeah, there's nothing you can do. So go or don't come, whatever. What you do in a relationship, like you got to go and just sit there with your girlfriend. You know, you got to do all the time with the kid.

I remember this. Like, what's logical? When I'm up with the baby, you sleep. When you're up with the baby, I sleep. So one of us is getting sleep, right? When your wife's up with the baby, you're up with the baby, you sleep. When you're up with the baby, I sleep. So one of us is getting sleep, right? When your wife's up with the baby, you're up with the baby too. There's no like you just...

That's insane. You just... That's insane. Well, let me just say this. That was my situation. So I don't know. Yeah, it's insane. It's like both of us have to suffer now.

Yes, because that's what you do. Because we love the company. Voicemails today are brought to you by Craft Mayo. We've been watching some of the videos that people are submitting to become the face of Craft Mayo. Right now, they're running a $10,000 challenge for the Craft Mayo endorsement, where you become the new mayo man. That guy, he was the guy at the sporting event eating mayo out of a tub. So people are trying to recreate that mayonnaise magic by submitting videos on Instagram and Twitter. And right now you can go check out all those videos and vote when you go to at real craft mayo across all social platforms.

You can vote and feed and give feedback and weigh in. Drop comments on these videos. We saw I saw a guy brushing his teeth with mayonnaise. Whoa. You saw a guy shaving with mayonnaise. Casey saw a guy sleeping with mayonnaise. Truly sleeping. With a jug of it?

Yeah, I think so. I'm sure there are people using it as lotion and putting it all over. It's like Kramer when Kramer shaved with the butter. It's smart. It's smart. I said, listen, who doesn't like white teeth? Yeah. Shave with that, brush with that mayo, you know?

So we're trying to figure out who's going to be the face of Real Craft Mayo. So you can check them out at Real Craft Mayo and get in on the action, as well as, of course, use the number one condiment of all time on all your sandwiches and food. Follow along on all social platforms at RealCraftMayo. All right, let's get into our voicemails. First, before we do that, a funny little bit of internal Barstool news. So we have the Viceroy accounts all across the country. It was one of the smarter things we've ever come up with

in order to get onto every college campus and infiltrate all the student bodies all across the country. We would start Barstool Florida State, Barstool Fordham, and just go all across the country. But the problem is you have to hire these kids who are on campus. They're kind of an employee, but more of an intern.

And it's just like, yeah, here's my resume. Like I like to do social media and I'm on the campus. And, you know, we try to pick good ones. But some people, I think Jack Mag, I think a lot of people have been viceroys and then get a full-time job here. I think Tommy did that. I think 80% of our social team. Okay. So it's a real program and it's a good way to get in.

But every now and then some things slip through the cracks. And last week we found out that one of the Viceroy Network guys was 51. A 51-year-old running a bunch of barstool Twitter accounts. Do you know for what school? Because maybe he's just a super senior. If he's at a big Southern school, he definitely could be a 51-year-old. Yeah, I was going to say, the rule is you have to be enrolled in the school. Like, they definitely could just be a 51-year-old. Yeah, I was going to say, the rule is you have to be enrolled in the school. So as long as he

somehow, some way was, I think, and then I believe somebody might have quote tweeted it and said like, fake news.

We just, like, what was it? Maybe it was Tyler O'Day. Somebody said like, we didn't hire him, but like, it's been taken care of.

I was like, motherfucker, there was a 51-year-old. Yeah. There was a fucking 51-year-old working here. That's a tough one. Let's look through the cracks.

You got to have to make sure that no one's getting AARP magazines who's also running our college accounts. I believe 50 is when you start getting the AARP. Maybe it's 55. 50. Motherfucker was getting AARP magazines mailed to his house. And he's tweeting about fucking smoke shows and fucking college parties or whatever. Come on!

He's trying to keep up with the latest Twitter memes. Unbelievable. Also a little behind Barstool. Dave said the nicest thing he's ever said about me. I saw that. On the Bust with the Boys podcast, which was but in perfect fashion because when it comes to Dave, like he'll – even when he's trying to be nice, he'll just fucking – he's a pain in my ass.

So he went on Bustin' with the Boys. They asked him if he would start Barstool from scratch. Who were the first five draft picks? And he goes Dan, Kevin, Alex Cooper, Biz, and Witt. And that's awesome. It's very flattering. I was actually like, Josh actually sent it to me. And I kind of read through it quickly and thought I wasn't on there.

And I thought he was just sending it to me to be like, how about this? So you see this? Because sometimes he'll send me something. When Troops was calling me bargain bucket, he'd send it to me like if you want to chirp back so i thought he was just being like look like dave fucking left you off this list like go you know go get him or whatever and i was like uh and then i read it and realized what it was and i told him i was like um i'm happy i realized what that was because like a i would have been devastated and b i would have been fucking furious with you if you just sent that to me for no reason so uh like super nice probably the nicest thing dave's ever said about

me all it has led to is an entire day of people tweeting me how i shouldn't be on the list just a ton of my haters being like fuck kmc why should why what does he even do here why should he be on that list so the nicest thing days has brought brought me hours and hours and hours of misery. So thanks, Dave. Thanks a lot. Voicemails. Let's go. Listen, I live in a small apartment complex, and across the hall from me is about a 56-year-old ex-military.

One day he comes out and he asks me, he says, hey, do you want to play catch with me? You know, throw the ball around. So, as a goodness in my heart, I say yes. So I go out. This fucking guy has me going into full catcher squats and is throwing stingers off my hand. And now it's to the point where every time this guy

comes out and it's a day that it's 65 or nicer, he's always asking me to play catch, but it's gotten too far. And right now he asked me at seven in the morning during a work week, if I wanted to go out and play catch with him. So I had to say no. And today I'm hung over a shit. It's seven 30 in the morning and he's pounding on my door wanting to play catch. So I have two questions. Am I in too deep? And what's something that you did out of the goodness of your

heart that you ended up regretting later? That's a great question. Thank you. Great scenario. I mean, that is... Call the police. Just call the police. That's the only acceptable thing here. I will say this. Plant drugs in his house. Just call the police.

Send some child porn to his email. I think having a catch is one of the best things in the world. And I think having the occasional time, the occasional situation, you're on the beach or you're wherever, football, baseball, myths, whatever. It's awesome. Like, it's just like. The last catch I had, Easter 2018. Wow.

You really remember, huh? Like, I've thrown a ball back and forth. Yeah, yeah. Like, this was me and my brother had gloves on in the backyard, just fucking chucking it. Unbelievable. Amazing. Not like getting into catcher squats and shit like that, but just fucking. But it's like, and then, I mean, afterwards, I'm like, oh, my God, I can't, like, lift my arm anymore for, like, a week.

But it's a great thing to do. Yes. It's actually the last thing that, like, I don't really want to go. I mean, sometimes I wish I was, like, still in shape and I would love to go, like, play, pick up basketball or be in, like, a men's league or whatever. The people who do that stink. The people who do that. Bro, I've, like, gone to central park a few times since the weather got nice people throwing baseballs and footballs all over the joint not a single tight spiral not a single person they stink at it i think they suck for doing no they stink at it it's like yeah it's like someone who didn't

have the glory as a younger person that's what it is chase it down now yeah like i had my time in the sun that's kind of what I think it is. I like... It's like I played enough when I was younger. But then you forget. And so when you do do it and you got, like,

at least, you know, a good glove, at least you get a pop with a ball and you're... It is... There's something about it that's really enjoyable. Bro, I started doing, like,

the turn and double plays. Yes, yes. You don't even catch it. You kind of just trap it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love it. As soon't even catch it. You kind of just trap it. I love it. As soon as you're pivoting in one motion, you're starting to get cocky with it. But I don't want to go play a full game.

I don't want to be a part of a team where you rely on me. I certainly don't want to be going full gas where I'm boxing people out and getting elbowed. I see somebody tear their ACL playing like Zog Sports soccer like every other week. Having a catch, I think, is a perfect in-between. You know what I mean? It's like something active, a memory of your old days, but you don't have to break a sweat. Yeah, maybe throw some pop-ups, throw some ground. Maybe, I'm not going to do it, but some people, they do.

I mean, break off a curveball. I mean, they pop down. Oh, I some people they do you know break off a curveball they pop down you get in the spot I hate fucking don't ever throw me a curveball no it's like just fucking you know

I have like a buddy that was like my catch partner in high school and like every time I was never a pitcher never not even in little league

I was like play center field center fielder I was a pitcher until I hit Doug Himmelrich in the head I won right off his noggin, and I kind of lost it.

I had the yips after that. He was fine because we were throwing like 45. And he just ran down to first like no problem. And I was like, whoa. Could have killed him. Hit him in the face. But yeah, so you're not like you're never throwing. You're never a pitcher.

I mean, neither am I. So I can't throw a curveball. Neither can I because I can stop it at like 12. So it's not like, you're never throwing, you're never a pitcher. I mean, neither am I. So I can't throw a curveball. No, neither can I because I can stop it at 12. So it's not even like you need to. I can just throw a fucking piss missile in from center. That's all I can do. You're like these fucking kids, you know, flipping the glove up and down. No, we're not.

Just throw the fucking ball. There's a certain level of decorum. I remember I was having to catch the trading desk I interned for over the summer before I was blogging, before I went to Deloitte, CTC, Chicago Trading Company. They traded on the Merck, like the NYMEX, where you trade natural gas and crude oil and gold, all the commodities. And this dude, we were in the office just in downtime or after hours when the market was closed. We just had a little mini football, and we would, like, throw it around. And, you know, you're in the office. You're indoors.

You know, you just got to, like, lob it. And this dude was fucking zinging them, you know? And I would be like, whoa! Like, you know, and it would, you know, bounce off my hands. I'd drop it. Admittedly, I'm not, you know, fucking Randy Moss out there with the softest hands, but we were really close, and he was just whipping them. I think it was almost like a hazing thing.

It was like, look at the new kid. He can't catch. He was like, yeah, did you play wide receiver in high school? I was like, I don't know. I'm not standing 10 feet away from people while they crow hop a football at me, man. Sorry. I don't have those kind of hands. Because there's a certain level of just like, you know,

we're throwing the ball around here. You don't need to be breaking off the curveball. I don't need to be popping down to squat. You don't need to be throwing 95. But it is an enjoyable thing. Now, that being said. It's enjoyable when you're not playing because everyone has that friend who's like whipping it and the curveball is up and he's like,

I don't want to do this. That's what I mean. Now I have to worry about it. The leisure pastime. And that's usually, that's even a friend of yours that you're like, when it's a fucking stranger in your building, I can't believe. See, this is, I don't want to say he's in too deep because he should just be like, I don't want to have to catch with you anymore. And be like a grown man. But he did in the first place. The first time that he was like, yo, pop down for me, man.

Squat down, get your eagle on. I would have been like, no. So the fact that you already like, he's probably like, oh, yeah, this guy's great. He likes to do this. Yeah, man, I'm not doing that. Yeah, I was like, oh, yeah, no, I'm absolutely not doing that. But did he say equipment? I don't know if I heard equipment.

Did he put equipment on or did he just say it was getting down? No, no. He mentioned that he was also an ex-military guy. Oh, the other dude is an ex-military guy. The other guy is, so I think he's a little afraid. He's a little bit scared, yeah, but I don't know. I think it's rather poetic that the breakup of a catch duo is just as awkward as the breaking up of a catch. You just kind of keep doing that.

You'll stay in there until someone... Somebody breaks. You ever have a catch where somebody really can't throw, they're always throwing it over your head or too far over. I actually don't like it right now. Because it's like... Because I don't stand for it. Well, yeah.

Now I'm running around chasing this ball down. You go practice a little bit. Come back to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's tough to... You can level up to me eventually, but you go fucking practice on the wall, and then we'll work at this. But I feel like every game of catch goes on at least 15 to 20 minutes longer

than both people want them to. What you got to do is, I'm thinking almost more when it's football on the beach, you got to almost throw airmail a little bit, and then you kind of run in. Yeah, yeah. And then you catch it, throw it, you run in, then you're at your seat, sit down. It's over. The game's over. Yeah.

Just slowly tricking someone. Yes. It's like, oh, you're a lot closer now. But anyway, you can just stop. You can just, you have to just stop doing this. You have to stop doing this. You can't be, you know what you do if you're afraid of this guy? Pop a sling on one day.

Knock on your door, open it up, and be like, you know what? That's pretty smart. I just got surgery, and also they told me no throwing for the next 10 to 12 months. Ever again. Yeah, and then a year from now when he knocks on your door, because he will, you're going to be like, didn't rehab right. A doctor told me I'm never going to throw again. Can you believe it?

That's pretty smart. Yeah, that's pretty smart thinking right there. If you're a coward and a social misfit and you don't want to just say, hey man, I'm not interested in having a catch with you, stranger, you pop on a sling. Pretend you've been injured. As far as what's something you started doing on the goodness of your heart,

I mean, that's going to be a tough question at all, let alone to relate it to this voicemail here. I don't think I have anything. I could see a scenario where, like, I was going to say I've kept in touch with some people, but I like them. But, like, you check in and kind of be like, hey, how you doing? Like, you go through something together or you check in on them. Like, hey, you know, you have some sort of trauma bonding or something like that, and you always, like, check in on them. And now you feel like you go through something together or you check in on them like, hey, you know, you have some sort of trauma bonding

or something like that and you always like check in on them and now you feel like you always have to. But the people that I have Oh, I stopped all my checking in about a year ago. Done with it. With the pandemic? Was that? When the pandemic started, I was heavy with checking in. I was fucking juggling 10 different people like how you holding up, how you holding up, blah, blah, blah.

And then the phone wasn't ringing both ways. And that's like, I'm done with this you're done with it i'm just gonna stop checking on people like and like not that i needed it or anything i was like but it's like i'm going through so much trying to make sure everyone's okay and i don't really care so i'm just gonna fucking stop that's the saddest story i've ever heard that's a great question though if any any anybody was i could see you know if you're like i i went to lunch with like uh my grandma every week to like you know and now i don't want to fucking do it anymore something like that where you're out of the you're you once you get

your fill of i'm a good person like i'm doing something good i'm superior and then it's like okay well now why am i doing this yeah i guess I guess I probably did that with my grandfather in golf. We're like, every day. Not every day, every week. Oh, that's a lot. And he'd pick me up and go golf lessons. And I just did not. I didn't hate golf.

I loved my grandfather. My grandfather was a fucking man. So it wasn't like, it was the golf aspect I didn't like. It wasn't hanging out with him. I'd rather be like, yo, this is not a home and shit. I get a coffee every time I go to the kids, to pick up the kids in the morning for Caitlin. And it's fine, but sometimes it's like I'm late or like,

and I'm like, if I, like she expects it now, you know what I mean? So it's like, I don't really have time. Then I get there and there's a line. I'm like, can I just go without the fucking coffee? That's a dumb little tradition I've started for myself. i i got a simp story then let's go simp story it's simp city let's go this is gonna be a new theme simp city i want people to call the voicemail number two six four six eight oh seven eight six six five call up leave us your best Sim City 2000 I want everybody

and be honest because you're Josh said he went around the office and they all said no nobody would like people know we're

a comedy website here right you know that we're like all self-deprecating assholes who tell you know your funniest most embarrassing story for the good of the content

but none of these fucking cowards at Barstool would do it call up fucking change your voice if you want to. Do it anonymously, but tell us your best simp story, because the first one, the first, you kind of had two in there with the homeless date and the tattoo. You know what I mean?

So John's already got gold and silver. Does he have bronze today? What do we got? This one would, if anything, this one's bronze. This one's not to that level at all. This is the girl I was dating when I was at Barstool. And basically every day we would order lunch together and we'd eat lunch. Yeah, that's just how it went.

We were dating. We were doing that before we were dating, and then we continued that tradition. And then we broke up. And this wasn't really simping because the goal of it was for me to be like, I'm good. Don't worry about it. Yeah, right. But I remember I ordered lunch and I got her like what she always gets because it was just on my seamless. Like we got the same thing every fucking day.

So I just put, you know, same order. And then I walked downstairs because she was on the second floor. I walked downstairs with her lunch. And if I had walked down there stark naked with a chicken mask, she would have been less surprised. She was like, what are you doing? And I walked over with her lunch and kind of put it down next to her. And she's like, you don't have to do this. And I did it.

I did it for at least the rest of the week, maybe two more weeks. Always paying? Always paying. 100% of the time, yeah. Bro, bro, bro. Bro, bro, bro. weeks always paying always paying 100 of the time yeah bro there was one time i fucking like i just like i wasn't even like snooping i just like i went up and i put it down oh no and i just saw her g chat up with her new boyfriend john's dropping off a fucking chicken caesar salad she's like I can't wait to fuck you tonight it's like it was like

yeah it was basically here's your stupid salad tell your boyfriend I said hi oh man John it's all it all as I say many times

it all makes sense boy yeah yeah that's it that's it we buy foodstuffs for girls that we shouldn't yeah there we go next voicemail up kfc fights everybody nick jackie whoever else is there so i get a question if you had the

opportunity to name your kid after a famous person, whether it's real or fictional, say your last name is Bond, would you want to name your kid James? Just name your kid James Bond or Michael Jordan, like it was already Michael B. Jordan. So would you do that if you had the chance? Second part is, would you yourself want to be named after someone famous? And part three is who would be the best person to be named after that was famous and who would be the worst person? Cheers to your DIC. We had this discussion the other night during the Nick stream. Who were we talking about?

Maybe Trey Young because he's got a pretty cool name. But we were talking about kind of the Malcolm Gladwell thing, you know, like you name your kid something and you kind of set him up for success yeah but you also set him up for some pressure you know um and i thought about that with keegan i was like should i should i come up with like a name for him that's like you know fucking dope keegan's pretty dope you know yeah but it's you know it's just a name it's like i like it it's like a nice irish name i think but you know like elon musk or something one. Yeah, but it's just a name. I like it. It's a nice Irish name, I think, but Elon Musk or something that's unforgettable. Nobody will ever go like, what's your name? Is that Jim or John?

It's fucking unforgettable. But then if that kid sucks and he's got a cool name, it's like, you know what I mean? There's a waste. Yeah, yeah. So are you giving your kid an opportunity are you giving your kid pressure you know i think you're getting pressure is it sort of thing i i would i would not i would definitively not do a kid like i would not give a kid mike if i was jordan not do a kid i don't do do kids. If I was, if it was like, if my last name was Jordan, I would not name Michael Jordan. That's particularly crazy. Even just because, like, what if they get famous on their own and they have to go by Michael B. Jordan?

Michael B. Jordan is brutal. That's a pain in the ass. Now Michael B. Jordan is made that cool. Michael B. Jordan is so fucking good and so cool and good looking and all that shit that he, like, broke that. Right. You know, I would ordinarily say, like, you're done, dude. Like, you have to have, you have to go by Mike Jordan or you have to just change, go by your middle name.

He should just be whatever the B is, Bradley Jordan, whatever. But he's done it, so hats off to him. But almost everybody else, you know, you're fucked. I would do it with a murderer. What if your last name was Woods? Oh, boy, never mind. Forget about my hypothetical. What about yours?

I would do it with a murderer. Yeah, like, I would, like. You would name your kid name was Woods? Oh, boy, never mind. Forget about my hypothetical. What about yours? I would do it with a murderer. Yeah, like I would – You would name your kid Ted Bundy? If it was – no, if I – the third one was like, what would you want? I think it would be funny if I was like a professional, funny-ish person, and my name was like, yeah, Ted Kaczynski. That's funny, man. That's good stuff. What's the clown one? Gacy.

You're going to go by John Gacy? John Wayne Gacy. John Henry Gacy. Or like, who's the guy, who's the guy, Edwin Kemper. I'm Ed Kemper. Nice to meet you. I have a podcast. I don't think Ed Kemper goes.

It's got to be the heavy hitters for everyone to really know. I feel like it's got to be Charles Manson, Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy. You know what would be crazy? And I don't know why, but I think it's way worse. Like if you're a girl named Casey Anthony right now, I would rather be named Ted Bundy as a guy than be a girl named Casey Anthony. Yeah, because Casey Anthony, you meet a Casey Anthony right now. Which is entirely possible.

I'm like, was it you? You dyed your hair? Are you? Because I remember what she looked like, but not really. I could make, my memory could make anyone look like her, but she just dyed her hair. Right. I could make some look like her, but she just dyed her hair. Right. I could make some alterations.

Oh, she lost a little weight. She's got a couple pounds. I love that every couple months, Casey Anthony's OnlyFans goes viral. Oh, I've only ever seen this. That's what I mean. It doesn't exist. It just goes viral. Casey Anthony's on OnlyFans.

And every month, people expose themselves as being sick motherfuckers. And every few months, I quietly expose myself as being a sick motherfucker because I would sign up real fast. I would not tell anybody. I'd probably tell people. If I was a regular person, I wouldn't tell anybody, and I would for sure jerk off to Casey Anthony. That one just slipped out. Don't worry. I'm with you. Yeah. I always got my back. That's a slipped out. Don't worry, I'm with you.

Yeah, I was. Don't worry about it. I always got my back. That's a real friend. That was the first time in many years that I was like, ooh. I don't think I've done that. Nah, I fucking... And if you said you wouldn't, you're a fucking liar.

Kevin, I fucking sexed with her. Did you fucking see anything? Did I fucking see anything? Yeah, sure, why not? Well, I'll tell you why not. She murders babies. What? She's still got needs.

You would fuck Casey Anthony for her needs? For her wants? It's always about you with me, Kevin. I'm a zip. Motherfucking S-I-N-P. He's such a giver. He's going... You would go down on Casey Anthony and nothing else.

Oh, I'd fucking munch that pussy so hard, dude. I'd fucking eat Casey Anthony's pussy with a finger right in her butt. All right, all right. Okay, fine. There's a tough guy. Go ahead. Keep making it worse. I'll do it.

I got a question for you. I got a question for you. It would probably have to be money, like, incentivized. We'll see about that. Would you have a baby with Casey? Oh, Jesus Christ. No.

And that's not Casey's fault. I give everyone room to grow. That's my decision. The only reason is because I don't think I'm ready to be a father. The mother is a baby murderer. People make mistakes the only reason is because i don't think i'm ready to be a father it's not that the mother is a baby murderer if i told people make mistakes and we have to allow that room to grow from them if you met casey anthony and she was like how about this what if you had definitive irrefutable

proof that casey anthony didn't do it okay And let's say somehow, for some reason it's not, the public can never know that. Let's say Casey Anthony, let's say Casey Anthony has proof that it was like her mother that did it. And she's like, I can't do that to my mom. Okay. So you and her know that Casey is innocent and that she truly was like a good, she's a good person otherwise. And she's a fox. And you get to know her, and you're going to be with her,

and she's like, let's have a kid together. Would you A, do that, and B, if you wouldn't do that, how much money would it take for you to do that? Because you might do it for free. I wouldn't have the kid with her. I'd be in the relationship with her. You don't want to have a kid, right? Yeah. The problem here has nothing to do with Casey Anthony.

It's just you not wanting to have kids. If you could somehow disassociate for a second and not have a problem with having kids, if everything else was right, would you have a kid with Casey Anthony? I probably did. The whole thing is that Casey Anthony would be the second most difficult you-don't-know-or-like-I I do relationship I had to sell. I was fucking born in this shit, man. I could fucking do this. It's like,

I have sold fucking You got relationships like Casey Anthony would be like, I'm sorry. I'm sorry you had to go through that. Wow, she's really crazy. Oh, my God. That is amazing. I think we end on that note. We ain't topping that.

Let's go to our interview. Nikki Cass is here. Great kid. Instagram superstar. Racking up. He's got a million followers across all platforms does some funny ass impressions a really great kid so it's kfc radio and the new generation gen z yes kfc radio gen z let's do it all right we got nick cassano in the building you know

nicky meets nicky nicky this nicky that i like nicky meets. Nikki Meets? Yeah, I like Nikki Meets. Nikki Meets is a good one. Yeah, you're the first I think, probably the first, you know, quote unquote, TikToker which I know you said you're not really that. I don't really like that term. But as far, yeah, and I can imagine. It's a derogatory term to me. No, listen, it's not a derogatory term. We used to get it with blogger a lot where it was like,

you're a blogger? Oh, you make money? Is that what your job is? I don't know, man. But I didn't want to say I'm a writer. I didn't want to say, we're certainly not a journalist or anything. So it was just like, yeah, man. And then eventually, once this shit got real, I was like, yeah, I'm a fucking blogger. Yeah. But so what do you, I mean, just an online personality, right?

Yeah, I would say, I like to say like Instagram comedian. Like when people ask me, like it depends who it is, but I never use the term TikToker just because I feel like that puts you in a box you know what i'm saying like i don't like to get put in a box i like to do a lot of different well you got to be careful comedian though you tell a real comedian you're wait no let me tell you so wait so hold on so perfect example so i was at uh this pizza place sally's pizza in new haven and i told the guy we can get into that if you want. I've never had it, but I hear these guys. No, it was very good.

Very good. Shout out Sally's. Not sponsored, by the way. Anyway, so the guy at the front was like what – I was wearing a Chubbies mask, like that brand. Chubbies is like, oh, nice mask, whatever. We get into talking. I told him I do social media, and he was like, oh, are you an influencer? I said, no, I don't really like to use influencer.

I like to say Instagram comedian. He goes, well, I haven't laughed once. Oh. I like to say Instagram comedian He goes Well I haven't laughed once Oh I was like Shit I'm sorry Like I don't Like how do you respond to that

But I guess you're right Maybe I just say I don't know It's the hardest thing It's a weird thing It's still Even now Like it's still

Like I don't know what to say Like when I'm feeling I just moved to a new apartment Fucking six months ago now Yeah More longer than that Occupation I tell him self-employed

I'm like Oh Okay For a little while I had content creator this time Oh Yeah That

You gotta realize man Even Let's call it Let's say it was 20 years Let's say Even if you started in the year 2000 Doing some sort of Right

Like that's That's a speck on the fucking Yeah In the timeline Of all things considered So it's still in Like it's infancy Where we haven't figured out There's a speck on the fucking, you know, in the timeline of all things considered. So it's still in, like, its infancy where we haven't figured out. There's a lot of terms. Influencer, personality.

All these things floating around. We haven't settled on one yet because, you know, we don't know yet. And they all do come with a connotation. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, I just feel like the term influencer, TikToker, it always comes with, like, you never get someone that says, oh, wow, it's always like, oh. Yeah, it's like, what is that? And it doesn't matter how big you get. No, exactly.

Like Logan Paul, it's still like he's a YouTuber. Right. He's worth like $50 million. Yeah, you know what I would say? If I was those guys, like, so what are you? I'd be like, I'm a millionaire. It's always the ER. It's just YouTuber, TikToker.

Yeah, exactly. You know, that's exactly it. It's the YouTuber Yeah exactly You know That's exactly it It's the ER The ER drives me Fucking insane And then influencer It's like I don't know

Am I influencing people To do But then you get the people If you're If it's an influencer Talking to an influencer Then they're just like Yeah

Yeah we're influencers How about this This morning So I don't know If you got me up But we're like Testing out some new products Right And I was testing out some new products.

Right. And I was testing out this new stuff at our house. Right. And my girlfriend's like, aw, it's like you're a little influencer. And I was like, hang the fuck on.

First of all, I'm bigger than a little influencer, but I'm also not an influencer. Yeah, I just feel like... I literally gave her like a slight shove

out of the bathroom. Like, look, get the fuck out of here. And it's just, I don't know. I just don't like the term influencer. Because you know what you think about when you think about influencer? You just think about hashtag ad, hashtag sponsor. That ain't what I'm here to do.

I'm just trying to, you know, like this all started, I was just having fun. And now I'm sitting here doing this podcast. So it's just been like a crazy ride. But I never. And the thing about TikTok too is that like there's many different forms of TikTok a gazillion

there's the weirdos we have a guy here he just compiles all the weirdest TikToks there are all these people who they don't have bones in their arms they spin them around

you knew exactly who he was talking about yeah sometimes it's sad but the people with the doll baby dolls

because they're like the kids weird shit then you've got like we call baby dolls, because they're like the kids. Weird shit. Then you've got the, like, we call them wiggle dickers. They're like the fucking 15-year-old boys who think they're hot and dancing. Making shit tons of money. They're making so much money. Shit tons of money.

But then you've got, like, you're doing funny shit. You've got people who do, like, they can do really cool, like, editing. Like, they make cool videos. Oh, yeah. So I'm like, some of this is brilliant. Some of this is, like, amazing shit. And then, but then a lot of people lump you in with, like, oh, you do TikTok, so what? You dance with your shirt off. Right, yeah. So I'm like, some of this is brilliant. Some of this is like amazing shit. But then a lot of people lump you in with like, oh, you do TikTok, so what? You dance with your shirt off.

Right, exactly. And it's like, oh. Exactly. But the other day, I saw some guy, like to piggyback off of the people who are just wicked talented that get to showcase what they can do. This dude, I don't know if you've seen, you probably have, had a canvas. And he took a gazillion spray paints and just started spray painting lines and then before the video was done it was like this beautiful sculpture like that I was like fuck did you like I'm sitting on the toilet I'm like what's this what am I doing that's why sometimes when sometimes I'm like

yeah no I I'm a blogger or I'm a this yeah and like Yes, exactly. And like you said, man, so you were what? You said you were – where were you working about a year ago? I was working in a gym. Working in a gym. I was working in a gym. You're a fucking gym rat, man. Yeah. You were always lifting, grunting, groaning.

I just crushed a protein shake before. I saw you had the shaker in your hand. Yeah, I had to make sure that I got – Going out in the world to do something, but I got to bring my protein shake. Yeah, I had to make sure I got the 40 grams in. Yeah, so I was working in a gym, and this was last year. How old were you? 20.

Yeah, so I was working in a gym, and I've always been the funny guy. I've always been the one to- Class clown sort of thing. Yeah, the classroom was not for me. And the teachers who didn't understand that, I made their life miserable. Not on purpose, just because it just wasn't for me. And I couldn't sit still like i remember i would have to get up every five minutes yada yada but like the teachers who let me do my thing i still talk to you to this day and they're like when i tell them all the stuff i'm doing they're like wow i always knew it i always knew

it because you couldn't sit in the classroom a couple guys here you see michelangelo uh like he won his senior year was like most likely to be famous or something like that. A lot of people here, on camera, behind camera, whatever. You've got a little sign of it. You know what I mean? Yeah, but I was never in theater. I was never – all these terminology, these vocab words I'm learning are just brand new to me, all this stuff. So I played baseball throughout high school.

I played in college, and then I gave it up sophomore year. So I started working in this gym and then TikTok was blowing up. And like my friends were telling me like, yo, you got to make videos. Because what I would do is I would like, I guess I was a content creator back then, but I was like making these videos on Snapchat. And it was just like me and my friends. And like I remember one time I did Like how to grill chicken And I just was like being a jerk off

And like doing the voice Like the voice I've been doing this voice for quite some time Okay So and I would do that By the way your regular voice I was going to say your voice was the same Yo

It's a little exaggerated But you actually talk like you have And you know what I thought when I shook your hand I thought you were doing the voice Oh no no no Not at all But like when I get worked up And I get passionate, like the voice comes out a little bit.

Like not on purpose. It's just the way that it is. But anyway, so I'm working in this gym and TikTok had just come out with that long face filter. And I saw that and like it was just like click. Like light bulb went off. I was like, this is perfect. Here we go, Anthony. Let's go. Do something, kid. Let's go. Do something here, kid. Let's go.

Jesus Christ. Time out, Blue. Sir, you're a parent. You can't come on the field. Mind your business, jackass. Give me this fucking bat. Watch. Get your chubby ass up in the box. Do a couple of these. Ida, pitch it down. Put the bat up here.

And when the ball comes, look. Look at me. Look. You see? Boom. Make contact. If you don't, and when the ball comes, look, look at me, look, you see? Boom. Make contact. If you don't, you're sleeping outside tonight. Thanks, Blue. My kid don't strike out. So it's— But even when you're doing that, when you say the light bulb goes off, you mean like this is perfect to make my friends laugh?

Yes. Or perfect to like— Yes, this, what I'm doing now was never in the cards, ever. Didn't even think about it. I thought, because I was training clients, too, because I'm certified. I was running a little gym personal training thing out of my garage over the summer. And then I'm working in this gym training, like, probably six or seven clients a week. And it was always just like, this is going to make me laugh. Like, if I think it's funny, fuck yeah.

That's usually, yeah. We know that well. Yeah, so it's 7.52, and the gym closes at 8. I'll never forget. I'm like, you know what? Like, if I think it's funny, fuck yeah. That's usually, yeah. We know that well. Yeah, so it's 7.52, and the gym closes at 8. I'll never forget. I'm like, you know what? Like, fuck it. I'm going to make a video. So I took the filter, and it was non-Italian dads versus Italian dads when you go out,

when you tell them you're going to go out. So the non-Italian kid's like, hey, dad, I'm going out. I'll be back in like an hour. And the dad, non-Italian dad's like, yeah, sure, no problem. And then I'm like,, hey, dad, I'm going out. I'll be back in like an hour. And the dad, non-Italian dad's like, yeah, sure, no problem. And then I'm like, all right, dad, I'm going out. And then that's when

the Pasquale character was born. He goes, wait a second. What do you mean you're going out? Where the fuck you going? It's 8 p.m. on a Wednesday. You're going out. And I made the video, posted it. I thought it was funny.

And then I went to sleep. Didn't look at my phone. Didn't check anything. You wake up. Yeah. Yo, I woke up the next day And I When is this exactly

Cause there was a certain time This is February Yeah This is February This is when Charlie D'Amelio Was doing all this And And so

I wake up the next morning And I go to take a shit And I open up my phone And my fucking And I didn't have notifications on So I open up the app And it's just like

I'm refreshing And it's like Follow follow follow follow I'm like yo This notifications on. So I open up the app. And it's just like I'm refreshing. It's like follow, follow, follow, follow, follow. I'm like, yo, this is going crazy. So I'm sending it to all my boys. How many did you end up with in that first week? Like 2 million. 2 million views. What?

Yeah, no, no. Wait, views or follows? Views, views. Oh, follows. No, no. Shit. 2 million follows. That'd be crazy.

Yeah. I would have got driven in an escalator if it was 2 million follows. But yeah, so it was going crazy, and I started texting all my boys. I'm like, yo, look at this shit. But it was like one of those fad things. It wasn't like, you know, I never thought it would be anything. That's how it was with the blog for me. Like, I was writing my own blog, and people were like, you know, you should, like, apply for Barstool.

I was like, eh, it's just a thing that I do here. Yeah, exactly, exactly. It'd be a lot more real than that. And I tell people all the time too and we can get into this if you want but like people always ask

like what what is what's the secret like they want the secret sauce I'm like ain't no secret sauce like if you find something funnier if you enjoy something

chances are somebody else is gonna enjoy it too and I just sort of roll with that but so when that video went crazy

I kinda like I was going like a hermit crab going back under the shot. I got really scared. Because like. That type of attention. Oh, nuts. Yeah. Nuts. Starting to think about everything you've ever said.

You're like, ah, fuck. What do I have tweeted right now? Yeah. People start to look into you. But the thing that was bothering me was people were hating on the fact that they were saying, oh, this kid is giving us a bad name. And I just didn't want that. That wasn't the goal.

And so I kind of was like, and when you're Italian, I don't know if any of you are. You see us both, right? Yeah. No Italian on this side. I listen. You don't look it, though. Because I'm blonde hair, blue eyes. Yeah, I don't know. Are you 100%?'t look it though Because I'm blonde hair Blue eyes Yeah I don't know

Are you 100% Yeah the Punnett Square Really I got the I got like the.3% Of the Punnett Square You know what they tell you In school I would have thought

Maybe No I don't I was gonna go along with it I have no idea I've heard It's sort of something With the genetics My sister actually

She's the studious one You got Neither you look like Fully Italian Yeah no She would come home With 104 GPA She's the studious one. Neither of you look like fully Italian. Yeah, no, nuts. She would come home with 104 GPA, and I would come home with like a 90 all proud, and she'd just like shout at me. Slouch though?

Shit. That's in high school. That's in high school. Still good. You're talking to two. Well, not two. I'll wear this one. You're talking to one C minus D student.

Two overall idiots. Here we are now. I forgot what I was saying. They thought you were giving them the bad names of Italians. Us Italians, we get very, I'm sure you know, we take a lot of pride in where we come from. With any culture. Let me crack a knowledge for you. Italians like Italy. Oh, do you? Sure. With any culture, yeah, sure. You just dropped that one. Let me crack egg and knowledge for you.

Italians like Italy. I don't got a chain because when I lift, because I'm going to beat that ball. The bar, like, really. No, I'm serious. Anyway, I got to get one now. So, any tats? Not yet, but I'm going to get one. A flag or something?

No, no, no, nothing like that. So, I'm going to get that supplement company we work for. I'm going to get one. Are you going to get a flag or something? No, nothing like that. I'm going to get that supplement company we work for. I'm going to get one right here. It says, go one more. I'm going to put it right there. Very big reason. That statement is a very big reason why I'm sitting here today. I'm going to get, I always want this, no joke. You could ask anybody who knows me.

I want a T-bone steak. No, I'm serious. I like that one. Since high school. And then I want to get, this one's kind of sentimental. I want to get like a bunch of arrows

on the back of my tricep. We could get into a lot, but anyways, like there was this, in the third grade, I saw this video, this Indian chief. He broke one arrow

in front of his tribe. And then he was like, gee, you could break one arrow easy, but then he took a bundle. But then he took a bundle and he was like, when you got each other, but then he took a bundle and he was like, when you got each other,

you can't, whatever. Anyway, I think it's cool. So back to being Italian. We take a lot of pride in where we come from. So when I started seeing all these things, I was like, you know what? Fuck, I'm going to show these people

that I know what it's like to grow up in an Italian house. Right. So I can say it and I can do it and I'm not taking shots at it because it's my life. So what I started to do was the, like the no,

no, no, no, like the immigrant style, like comedy. True Italian. Yeah. And,

and by doing that, I feel like I kind of like legitimize what it was I was doing. And it wasn't about making fun of where I come from. It's just like, I feel like in comedy, you know, the things that are like crazy that go on in your life, like as,

I guess I would say I'm a comic. I don't fucking know. You take it and you make it funny, and it just makes everything okay. That's what I was doing, and people were loving it. One of the comics we always have come through here is Joe Coy. He's the best, bro. What he did for Filipino culture is fucking nuts. A huge part of his act is all about the style that they grow up and live and the accents.

Oh, so good. And so it's a smart play. Yeah, listen. You got it. You got the voice. You got the family. Yeah, why not? Joe Coy is great, by the way.

I mean, he's doing monster things, man. Selling out literal arenas around the world. I was watching his special on Netflix. I was peeing my pants at 2 in the morning. Yeah, he is good, man. When he landed in the Philippines and just had, like, a police escort to meet the president or whatever, it was like, jeez, gross.

I swear to God, I think Joe Coy could, I don't know, take presidents or whatever over there. He could be the leader of the Philippines. I mean, the Philippines duerte, right? I don't even know what that means. I think the Filipino president is Rodrigo Duerte. He's the guy with the murder squads.

Oh, so he can't be that. I could be wrong. I think he's the president of the Philippines. Joe's out. You get into the cultural shit like that and do it in a funny way. So now, is this... I mean, I hate to be like the guys who always used and do it in a funny way. So now, is this, I mean,

I hate to be like the guys who always used to say it to me, but is it like a full-time job? Is it? Full-time, that's my assistant right there. No, I'm serious. It had to be.

I mean, I see you got the cuts on. I know you got the cuts, but like sponsorships and ads and all that shit started rolling in? Yeah, but it was rolling in like crazy.

And for me, like I said, I never planned to make money. It was never part of the thing. It was just like I'm going to make these because I think they're funny. And then the quarantine hit and it just sort of took off. And so like with the sponsorship piece, like I've done a couple of one-offs. Like I did something for Butterfinger. I did something for Pringles.

But I just didn't like – Oh, I saw the Pringles one. That was good. Yeah, thank you. I appreciate it. I did it all myself. I had to teach myself. No, that was cool.

I mean I was thinking about that. I was actually wondering if someone else did it because it had – No, I saw the pre-order. That was good. Yeah, thank you. I appreciate it. I did it all myself. I had to teach myself. No, that was cool. I mean, I was thinking about that. I was actually wondering if someone else did it because it had all the jump cuts and the edits and the – Yeah, I did all that shit myself. So – no, no. I moved with my MacBook. But anyways, couldn't ever. I airdropped it.

So for me, it was like never about the money. So – but I've done like a couple of the one-offs. I just didn't – I just don't like that sort of what making money but making like keep it authentic I'm 20 years old

and if you haven't already you know like could tell I'm very passionate about what are the things that I do and the people that I work with so

I just never wanted to come across as a salesman and I never wanted to like just say okay to like I'm not going to do a product about something that I don't believe in.

And like Cuts, every paycheck I got, I would spend money on Cuts back like a year ago because I loved the product and I loved what they represented. And then that supplement company I've been following,

I got rejected from them three times even as I was coming up. But for me, it was always like the coolest part of this whole thing has not ever been the money. It's just been the fact that I'm able to really live out a dream. The fact that I'm sitting here today is wild.

Was it? So I started out in a cube job. Yeah. And then I never had a dream. I was just going with the flow. My friends went into finance. I said, you can make some good money in finance. Let me do it. I never really had a dream. I never – I was just like going with the flow. My friends went into finance. I said, you know, you can make some good money in finance. Let me do it.

I never really had a goal. I guess when I was like – I remember being young. Do you remember when they did the sports center like competition? You could like be – it was like a dream job thing where you could become one of the sports center anchors. Yes, vaguely. And I was like – once it was clear that playing sports was not – you you can't become a professional athlete i remember thinking like that would be cool but i never was like i'm gonna set my sights and do it and go get it but you were like i want to do something in entertainment i want to do something comedy no it was like when it when it happened and it was kind

of like but that's what i mean it's like a dream come true but you never really had right exactly anyone anyone would look at who's a fan of like barstool sports who's a fan of like uh cuts or any like company whatever like you always think like oh what would it be like if i worked there especially with barstool it's like well what would i do if i was there at least for me so i guess it is kind of living out a dream but it's not like i set out to like right be here and i think i think a lot of the dreams people like achieve nowadays it just didn't exist when it was like right you couldn't you couldn't dream it like unless you be here. I think a lot of the dreams people achieve nowadays, it just didn't exist when you were a kid.

You couldn't dream it. Unless you had some fucking insane imagination. I couldn't dream of being a podcaster. It wasn't a thing. I guess you could say a radio host. I guess on some level, I listened to a ton of sports radio, so I guess it was there. But I think, unless you're an actor or a singer

where early on you're showing, okay,, this girl can say she's going to make this her dream. But other than that, I think the most authentic people are the ones who it's just like I was living my life. Right. Happened like because when you when you make it your goal, it kind of becomes not less authentic, but it becomes like you're catering. Right. And everything's strategically planned rather than just like right i don't know i was just writing down my thoughts people started to like it and they told their friends and they told their friends the next

thing you know dave found out so like that's how you make it authentic 100 i 1000 agree and so you're all your pasquale and no no nana like that's all your family yeah well okay so I'm gonna clear the air right now my dad is not even close to the Pasquale character in the way that he talks to people

in the way that he like treats me and anything like my dad's the most genuine fun loving guy but but that demeanor of like being assertive

and stuff like that is obviously holds true and I'm very grateful for it because without it I wouldn't have any content but the actual videos I've made none of that shit's happened to me in my life

but I've seen it happen with other parents and their kids you're telling me that your grandfather never took some Viagra thinking it was prednisone no

well actually it's funny I've never actually met my grandfather oh really wow but the character the no-no character is

actually someone in my family on my mom's side who's just like this goofball like yeah who would take the prednisone and would take the viagra and think it's prednisone um and he's great i mean like like i did one where um it was about like the movie avatar uh movie Avatar and that was real like we were sitting I could see an old Italian grandpa yeah we were sitting at dinner

no we were sitting at dinner and he came and he was like you guys just see that new movie Avatar and we were like

yeah he was like what do you think of that movie and I was like I thought it was good he goes yeah me too

I was a little confused like where did they find all of that blue people? And I was like, what do you mean? He was like, what planet did they get these blue people from? And I was like, are you being serious right now? He's like, yeah, because I never see that many blue people before. It's like, you know what it's like?

It's like that movie, like Planet of the Apes. You see that movie? It's like, how did they train the monkey to make it like, to do that kind of movie? True, like true. I'm not even lying. I wonder, I think this all the time as I'm getting older, not obviously like a grandfather, but like I got kids now.

Like I look at like dads. Yeah. Dads are usually like kind of goofy. Yeah. Behind the times. They don't get the joke all that shit like when does that like happen am i already you know i'm already behind on like the music and the song i think you're pretty good and maybe just because of what we do like yeah i think the profession changes but like if i if i was just if i stayed the course in finance would i just be

like what do you think you would know what like you think you'd be heavy on tiktok well certainly you were a finance guy i think you would dive into it i also i think i would just know what i don't know like you know i wouldn't be like oh who's the 22 savage that guy yeah he's really thumping right guys yeah i would just shut my fucking mouth right right but a lot of dads just try to like yeah and then but also i think when you become a grandfather, you don't give a fuck anymore. Yeah, and plus when you come from Italy, like, it's just a whole – Everything is – Whole different ballgame, like, really.

But that's shit. So we often joke, like, when something goes bad in our life, we're always like, well, so we're lying, like, it's going to be great for content. Yeah. Oh, 100%. Yo, John, I can't wait to do the podcast because something horrible happened. My life just fell apart. Let's record. Yeah, no, 100%. I'm almost like, yo, John, I can't wait to do the podcast because something horrible happened. My life just fell apart. Let's record.

Yeah, no, it's nuts. But when you, so you're sitting at the dinner table and he starts talking about what planet to the end, you must be like,

okay. Yeah, oh, money. We're going viral, Pop. Money. Like even, we just got a boat and me and my dad just got a boat

and automatically I'm thinking like, well, what would someone, what would Nono say about getting a boat? But that's where the comedy kind of comes in. Exactly. We're always thinking about premises and punchlines.

Even today. I'm walking. I got a coffee today. And this car pulled up to the side of me. And first of all, I don't know how many times you guys get recognized in public, but that is the weirdest shit. That feeling? Oh, yeah. Nuts.

It doesn't really go away from me. I mean, I guess you get used to it a little bit, but every time I'm like... You get a little nervous going into places? Not nervous, but there are definitely times. You go to a Murray Hill bar or an Upper East Side.

Certain places, you go to a hipster bar in Brooklyn. I don't know. No one knows you. But you go to other places and it's not nervous, but sometimes it's like, all right, it's going to be... You start to feel stuff. You feel nervous, but sometimes it's like, all right, it's going to be.

You start to feel stuff. You feel eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, it's going to be a lot of pictures. That's what it is. But it's also like, I said the same line every fucking time when people ask me if it's like annoying or bothersome. When it got annoying is when I used to be going, like, I would be out with my now ex-wife

and like people would be like, can you take a picture? And they'd like throw the camera in her hands and shit like that where I didn't like it. But then I always say, but the day that that shit stops, that's a problem. Right. I almost want to be uncomfortable. 100%. Nobody knows who I am. That means things have gone wrong.

100%. So it cuts both ways. But so, yeah, I mean, you go from working in the gym to this whole world. So what does your parents and your family think of it? I always wonder. They love it. Charlie, look at the D' millions is not like that girl one day probably had to go to her mom and be like mom you know if i sign up for this like what do they call

it the um when they when tiktok pays you it's like the creator fund creator fund like mom if i sign up for the creator fund like at these numbers i could probably make like a hundred thousand dollars a week yeah like you're and and obviously i mean, her family, you know, they were in the business. I mean, they took it and they ran. And their mom, I think, was already a dancer. I think that was almost like destined to be. Right, 100%. And I think Addison raised moms the same way.

But there's got to be a few of you guys out there who were just normal-ass families who expected their kids to just like, all right, like you're going to go to college. Hopefully you get a nice job. And next thing you know, it's like, oh, no, my kid, my son's famous. Yeah. No, crazy. No, wow. And I wouldn't say I'm famous.

But like when I go places like people know why. Same thing like we are. Let's say I'm not famous. Exactly. In certain circles, nobody knows who you are. In certain circles. I mean, you know, Rico texted me. Yo, that kid's hilarious.

I need to meet him. Yeah. He's a grown man. Who's being pathetic right now. I need to meet this dude. I took a picture with someone in the golf section At Dick's Sporting Goods Right

So some people To some folks Who like are watching Their TikTok Their Instagram They're like Oh my god You know

Yeah Did you have to have Like a sit down With your parents Explain like how It is successful And how it will make No no

You see Okay so my mom Thinks I'm Brad Pitt Because she just That's how she is Yeah Your parents are also Probably what Like 35 years old They're probably young Yeah no it is successful and how it will be. No, no. You see, okay, so my mom thinks I'm Brad Pitt because she just, that's how she is. That's what they do. Yeah, that's what they do. Your parents are also probably what,

like 35 years old? They're probably young. Yeah, no. My dad's 50, I don't know. Do you know? In the 50s. He's somewhere around there.

Young 50s. And so my mom just like, she'll laugh at anything. Like I could show her something and I know she's not laughing at it but like, she'll just laugh because he's the cutest son and the funniest boy in the whole wide world.

Yeah, and then my dad is actually the one who really pushed me to be like, you know, Nick, you really got a shot here. You got something here. What does he do? My dad is in business. He does a bunch of – he loves the sport of business. My dad's the type of guy where – Let me just tell you this real quick, though.

As an Italian guy with an accent, we say my dad does business. Yeah, yeah. We'll move on fast. He moves rocks. He's actually – my dad, you know, he's a florist. Did you know that? He deals with chrysanthemum. So my dad is actually the one who pushed me to like really pursue this

And he would tell me like you really have something here And when you first start blowing up Especially because I was really like It was like 100,000 followers a week Like it was going nuts Where are you at now? Total like through Instagram and TikTok I got a little

I think I'm at like a million You hit that M number man Nuts Crazy Yeah But anyways So everything was coming at me really fast, and it was really overwhelming because I'm still a full-time student.

I'm still going to school. And I'm going to go back to campus in the fall. I don't know what the fuck's going to happen. That's going to be wild. Yeah. That's going to be fun. Good for you. I feel like a lot of people...

Good for you, Nick. Exactly. I feel like a lot of people think about dropping out, and I'm like, no, no, I would be going. Yeah, no, I'm going to class. Yeah, I wouldn't focus on school. Yeah, I'm not going to college. You see, but I like that routine. Like, I like to have all my ducks in a row and be able to get it.

Yeah, you seem like a very disciplined kid who's like going to do it all correctly. Yeah, no, very much so. So my dad was the one who was really pushing me to do it. And then there was sort of this like back in November when I like really saw how much you could do with social media. Not in terms of money, but just like connections and really like pursue something that you want. Because I'd be crazy to sit up here and say that like the face filter is going to take me to where I want to go. But I'm passionate about fitness. I'm passionate about making pizza. As funny as that sounds.

Like I'm passionate about fitness. I'm passionate about making pizza. It's one of these. That sounds like I'm passionate about a lot of things. That's what's crazy about the Internet is you can do anything now. Like even, you know, like we we started out selling like T-shirts, silly T-shirts. Now we're making like full blown fucking clothes. Oh, yeah. We have a basic fashion line. Yeah, I've seen that. We make a card game.

We're making. We're going to try to get into food. Because it's just like wait a minute. If people trust you and you have your interests and they'll just do, they'll watch whatever you watch, they'll wear whatever you wear. They'll do whatever you tell them.

Not tell them to do, but here's what I like. If you like to be of interest, they'll do it too. To be able to have that audience to now really pursue other passions of mine and, like, do them as, like, my job is, like, the crazy – like, I tell my dad, like, the day I graduate, I'm going to do a cartwheel over the thing because, like, that's when my life's going to start. Like, that's when I can –

That's the other thing, too. You're so early, man. I could pursue a bunch of things. You started when you were, like, 19 or 20 now. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, like, that's – you're so ahead of the game in that term. You're also – the discipline thing, we can tell you are.

But, like, I had a drop down in us. Yeah. I was always just looking for an excuse to drop out. I never found one. They just kept telling me not to come back. That was my excuse. Imagine if you had a reason. Yeah.

Dude, I would – if I – I didn't have a Twitter or anything back then, but if I hit, like, 1,000 followers, I'd be like, I'm going to get fucked this place. Yeah, no, I mean, listen. It really messes with my head when I'm sitting in class. I'm like – What am I doing here? Yeah, but not like what am I doing. It's like where can I be using this time to do something else?

Yeah, I got to be honest, man. I don't know if it's the best use of your time. Well, listen. That's what everybody says. I hope the parents don't know if it's the best use of your time. I was the dad here when we had a couple kids early on who were dropping out. And I was like, I just – boys, I really think you should graduate. And certain people – it depends on if you got the goods or not. There are certain people I'm like, you should go back to school because you're going to need to get a real job.

But other people I'm now like – Bob Fox is a great example. He's our MMA writer. He's been trying to – he was emailing us when he was 13 years old. That's crazy. He was sending t-shirt designs and saying like one day I want to work for you. And now he does. And the minute he got his job, it was first semester freshman year I believe. Oh, I remember seeing something like that.

And I remember being a little nervous about it. But it's like he spent four years writing MMA and like honing his craft. It's a lot better than when you're sitting in like an art history class where it's like this has nothing to do. So now I'm on the other side of things where it's like if you really have the talent and like the brains for it and have a means to like actually get there, it's a better use. And you're not coming out with debt. I mean, there's a lot of reasons to not go to college. No, 100%. And I obviously see that point.

I mean, I deal with that all the time when I'm sitting in class about learning about the tides coming in. But if you want to do business, yeah. That's the thing that sucks about college is you have to do all these electives. Yeah, I'm writing about the Australian forest fires on Sunday. After like three years in college, they were like, look, you got to take a math class. I was like, I don't want to. Why? Why do I need to take a math class? I know the don't want to why why do i need to take a math class

i know the basic shit what else do i need and i have a calculator i'm good you barely know i barely know but if you give me a half hour i'll get the fucking addition problem done oh no i can't even do that no i'm like i'm terrible at math ridiculous but um so wait are you uh you were out you were not on campus like you said because of COVID. No, I was home. But like when – so in the fall, would you be like living in the dorms? Yeah. Are you going to be out?

Yeah, we got an apartment on campus. Can I come? I'll only pay for the beer. But the – yeah, no, I was quarantined like for seven months. So I really had no choice but to like but to give this thing everything I had. Think about that. All your friends are quarantined and just watching what you're making.

It is the most surreal, unbelievable... I'm sure you guys can attest to this. It's such a weird thing when things really start to work. You're doing things that are just so out of the ordinary. I don't know where are you so you're you're living at home otherwise

yeah expense-free right so money money starts coming in yeah and that's you know that's your money you know like yeah yeah well we started a company so we started Nikki cash media LLC so all the money is really going to like the company. And we – That's got to be wild for your parents. Sorry to interrupt. But as wild as it is for you to be like, holy shit, for like your dad to now be like, oh, shit. I got to like worry about – I got to like do my son's business now.

But he loves it. But he loves it. Like absolutely. That's what you want as a dad. Yeah, 100%. When my brother – so my dad does like property management i i like interned for like a couple summers doing it but didn't really didn't really end up doing it my brother like worked in the field for like 10 15 years before all this shit and then when it was time like he could make the jump full-time over here he was

like afraid to tell my dad because he was like my dad's got me so many connections and hooked me up and like i'm kind of like It's the family business In a way And he was like Dad I think I'm gonna like Switch gears and move And he was like Are you fucking kidding me Get the fuck out of there

It's building Go do this shit So as a parent All you want is like But also to do something cool And something to enjoy Yeah I'm very extremely Like grateful and blessed

To like Be doing what I'm doing Yeah but I also think You got a good family too. You've got to have the right family to not be shady. There's parents who steal their kids' money. There's parents who get jealous. There's parents who will stop you from doing your dream. The stop one is the big one.

I was always grateful. My dad was like, look, yeah, go do it. I remember my parents being like, you're going to go do it. Yeah. I saw a tweet. Like, if you fail – like, I remember my parents being like, you're going to leave this, like, job that's, like, pays money and it's got benefits. And, like, are you sure? I'm sure they thought I was stupid. Behind closed doors, they were like, this is fucking dumb. But they didn't tell us.

Right, and that's how they let me do it. I remember seeing a tweet that was like, imagine, like, being successful and then, like, you grow up or you raise a child and pay 200 grand whatever college costs for them to go to college and they want to be a theater major and like i was just like well like isn't that like the dream yeah you fucking yeah you i made a good living i can pay for like yeah a hundred percent i can help them chase their dream right a hundred percent but it's like yeah no that's actually it feels like one of those things where, like, it's become such a thing. Like a trope. Yeah, like almost like, oh, my wife's coming over.

You're supposed to like that person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Flushing all this money down the toilet for nothing. It's like, yeah, not for nothing. Your kid's happy. Yeah, and that's what it is. My dad has never, like, he was like, listen, Nick, you know, if this ain't for you, this ain't for you. I just want you to be happy. And to be in that position and to be this lucky is just, without getting too deep into it, it's very –

It's amazing, right? It's fucking – I got two important questions. Yeah, go ahead. One's for you. One's for you. The first one for you, are you at the point or will you ever get to the point where you're like resentful of the Pasquale character where you're like – Like if someone says like, dude, Pasquale, you're like, I don't do that anymore.

Like I moved on from that. You know what it is? It's just the timing of it. It's like I'll always do – because like I said, I've been doing it my whole life because I think it's funny. But like when people not just see you as like Pascual, but like if someone – They ask for it on demand. And the one thing – like social media is phenomenal. But the one thing that social media is not so phenomenal with is like people – especially if you have a big following.

I'm sure you guys know. Like people will just send you messages thinking you'll never see it. I see every fucking message. I know. I do the same thing where I'll reply and they're like, oh shit, I didn't even say that.

See that, so I wouldn't have said that. Well, then why did you fucking say it the first place? It hurt my feelings. Don't yell it in the fucking corner. Don't say it to your friends.

Exactly. I've had people write me a paragraph of how I should do this or do that. Granted, I don't get a lot, but when I do

and I respond, they're like, all caps, holy shit, I love you I didn't And I'm like It's important to remember too though When people are hating or chirping

That it's like If you ever did give them the time of day They'll be like Oh I'm a huge fan Huge fan That's what I'm saying But like The hate doesn't bother me

It's like Letting it Like if I give into it That's what bothers me the most It's like How did I get How did I When people say

I don't read the He's the only guy on the internet I know Who like really doesn't read comments or feed back. Yeah, because I shot you a DM about the supplements. You never got back to me. What's your famous line? It's like your DMs are none of your business.

What people have to say – like what strangers think about you is none of your business. Which is funny. That's a very good point. No, you got it right on that blue thing right there. On the – right up. I mean what people think of you is none of your business because what you said is like they're not expecting you to see it that's what they're saying to their friends or to other people it's like it's not for you it's not bad for you even though you're saying it right fucking to you no but i always tell people you're gonna

you're gonna see tweets because those just like pop up you're gonna see the dms because you're in there anyway some people are you know torture themselves a lot of people will go and read comments on blogs and shit Yeah Reddit pages All this shit You're gonna do that But it's whether or not

You If you let them change What you're doing Oh 100% When I first started Coming up bro I would spend probably An hour

To an hour and a half A night Like just responding To people's DMs You can't do it man You're going crazy Yeah no And I was

I remember telling Like my ex-girlfriend at the time I was like I'm I'm exhausted I don't want to but I just felt the need to because it was so new to me and like people were appreciating my content so I would literally like I'd have the pre-message like early Instagram so I would type the character and send it boom boom sometimes I'd even give her the phone while I was driving be like yeah just yeah, just click that. And it was crazy. So you were dating somebody when this all popped off? Yes.

How did that go? Oh, it was great. Was there anything weird with that? No, not at all. Because what you see on social media is what you get in real life. So I take great pride in that. For you, by the way. Most people I would argue not.

What do you mean? Most people, the social media, they're putting out like a version of themselves that's not real. And that was one thing I never wanted to be. It's just me and my phone at the end of the day. And so it was never really a conflict. And I was very lucky to have someone who like was so understanding of like what was going on. Like the reason we're not together is not because of anything to do with this. It was just – it was time and that's it. Yeah, that's fair.'s it um but yeah no it was none of those who are these girls in your dms most of the time it's guys who are in my dms yeah yeah i always said man if i was gay i would

oh not like not like that no no not like just like my audience guys my audience oh yeah talk to you and like sorry no it's uh, as long as there's somebody, right? Now, what's your impression of him? Has he changed? Is he different? Is there anything, does the family say like, oh, they're, my family's always kind of like, oh, KFC is talking, not Kevin's talking. Yeah, that bothers the shit out of me.

That bothers the shit out of me. You get that? Yeah. No, not that I get that. First, who do you think is older? Well, by that question, by that response, I'm thinking you are now. Yeah. But I would not have, so yes, yes.

So Nick was always my little brother, always like the goofball. And now he's like on the phone with like these business people. Wheeling and dealing. Yeah. That's what I'm saying for your parents too. It must have been weird. Yeah. Oh, my little baby boy is now Wheeling and dealing. That's what I'm saying for your parents too. Must have been weird. Yeah. Oh, my little baby boy is now.

Oh, yeah. No. Even I catch myself. He sounds exactly like my father when he's on the phone. I'm sure. Crazy. It's so nuts. And it's very weird to see him as like this mature, like I still can't wrap my head around.

No, it's like a business entity now. Yeah, sometimes I can't wrap my head around it either. How many years older? I'm 22. All right. So you're still not crazy. But, yeah, I mean, that's where I think I'd have – I think it would be very weird for me if, like, a younger sibling or just a sibling – if someone else was doing what I was doing,

I think I'd be like, what the fuck? Yeah. No. They're not even the funny one. Like, I'm the funny one. My dad literally – What's the wrong casino? funny one. My dad, I'm the funny one. My dad literally, my dad literally was like, one day he was watching something.

He was like, you know, Nick, I got to tell you, man, like I'm watching these videos and I'm seeing all these people comment saying you're funny. I'm like, the fuck are they thinking?

This guy's funny. He's just a fucking asshole. He really is. And I'm like, but that's why you like, those are the people that keep you. It's when you have the family members Who are like

Oh my god You're the next No I don't like you Let's go to Hollywood That goes bad That was never in the cards It's better to have the family Meet you

Yeah when you get home Your mom's like Do the fucking dishes Seriously And I wouldn't want that Any other way That's why And you know what's crazy

I don't know if you guys Experience this But like You ever listen to like Rap before You were like Doing all this And then you start listen to, like, rap before you were, like, doing all this? And then you start coming up and, like, the things that these rappers are saying, I'm like, wait a second. That kind of applies to my life.

All right. Which rapper would you say you can appeal to the most? None in particular. Just, like, some of the things they say about, like, when you start with no money and then you start making money and people start to reach out that never really reached out before. I'm like, wait a second, that makes sense. All these people coming around, their hand out a little bit.

The first time I got posted on the main page, bro, I heard from people I haven't heard from in years. We've been posting for a while now, right? I feel like we... Yeah. I mean, you're probably talking about the front page of TikTok or whatever, right?

No, Barstool. Are you talking about our – Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was going to say, we posted quite a bit as well, and I feel like that's – I thought we just hired you at one point. I was like, we posted so many videos. I was like, does he even work here? People are asking me at home.

They're like, so are you going to work for him? And I said, honestly, I don't know. But the first time – I wonder if that's – There's a couple guys that could have – who will be making that call. Because obviously you could post a million people. Yeah. But like who makes the cut is pretty – I think is a pretty big honor.

Yeah. Oh, very – That's a good sign. Very blessed and grateful and I appreciate whoever – No, I don't mean like that. I'm just saying that means you're doing – like your shit is actually funny. Right. Because a lot of people out there think they are and it's like – I mean how many times – post me, man.

You should post me on Instagram. That's what I would times? Post me, man. You should post on Instagram. That video sucks. You have to know that. You look at what's posted. You look at that video. That video sucks, man. Yeah, sometimes it's like, okay, why don't we just relax? But, yeah, so the first time I actually came here in September,

I did Game Time with Smitty. And Jordan, like, brought me around, showed me around. And I was like, can I, like, where's a guy that runs a main page? And she was like, oh, he's over here. I was like Can I like Where's a guy that That runs a main page And she was like Oh he's over here I was like Can I just go shake his hand

Yeah And so I I'm like How you gonna introduce myself I'm like I don't think you understand The reason I'm here right now Is because you answered my DM

Was it Gaz You know who it was No it was Chuck Chuck oh yeah Gaz would be like You're goddamn right And now I feel weird Because now like

Whenever I Think something's funny It's gonna like relate to the Like your guys' demographic And I'm would be like you're goddamn right and now I feel weird because now like whenever I think something's funny it's gonna like relate to the like to your guys' demographic and I'm I like shoot him

Chuck a text I'm like listen if you wanna post this go ahead but I just feel like weird like I don't wanna be pushy

yeah I don't wanna think I'm like use him cause I genuinely appreciate like the things that he's done I think that comes across though especially

after talking to you it makes you know it's you're not one of these you're not a TikToker You're not a pick talker. No, it's me and my sister. I ain't got an agency. Like, I'm going to go home and probably, you know, chill out and do whatever.

Like, lift some fucking weights. Yeah, lift some fucking weights, do some cleans. But oh, wait, before we wrap up, I got it. Are you doing this thing with Robbie? The pantry boys. Yeah, the pantry boys. We're coming. What are the pantry boys? No, we're fucking. We're coming. What are the pantry boys?

No, we're fucking coming in hot. What, like a food and snacks? So the pantry boys start. See, I always grew up and I found like happiness in like the fucking weirdest things. Like when you go to the deli and they give you a sandwich and like for whatever reason, the way they wrap up the sandwich. I'm sorry you didn't say sandwich. No, no.

And the way they wrap up the sandwich and the way they wrap the sandwich right and you open it up and it's like got that perfect paper underneath to me that just lights me up you like like you got noticeably happier just talking yeah no to me like last night i made a pizza and i ordered these tomatoes from italy and from italy yeah yeah it was a whole debate at the dinner table but um so i spent I spent extra money on the tomatoes coming from Italy And I was mixing up the tomatoes And I was putting it on the pizza I was just like, man, this is great The fact that I'm friending these two

So anyways, the pantry boys If these were like New Jersey tomatoes You wouldn't have had the same feeling you wouldn't have had the same feeling. I wouldn't have had the same feeling because you know what I want? You know what I want? Italian tomatoes. You go closer to home. No, wait.

I got this grill coming, the big green egg. I got the big green egg. I found out through like someone telling me that you can make pizza on a big green egg because it gets 700 degrees. Like the oven, you can't really make homemade pizza that well because the oven doesn't heat up the dough enough. And then it's like a science experiment trying to get the perfect mix. So the big green egg has come.

I'm like, you know what? I'm going to make the fucking best pizza I could possibly make. So I ordered these tomatoes. First of all, I watched a gazillion videos on YouTube. And I ordered these tomatoes. And they came. I lost my train of thought. I was too busy thinking about the tomatoes. Oh, here we go. Here we go. Hold on. I lost my train of thought. I was too busy thinking about the tomatoes.

Oh, here we go. Here we go. Hold on. I got it. So when I make the pizza, sorry, I keep talking to the mic. See, look at me. I'm getting fucking juiced up.

I want someone to take a bite of my pizza, right? And I want to be able to tell them after they tell me it's the best pizza they ever had, I want them to tell them, well, you know, I got the tomato shit from your motherland. That's all I want. I'll spend any amount of money to make sure I can say that

to people when they eat my pizza. So the pantry boys, we're going to bring people out and we're going to talk about hot and cold takes of food because when you come across someone who speaks the language, like the way I'm talking, you know when Bobby is on a

whole nother level like bobby gets it man like bobby's super talented and he's super rare too like he's a very particular like demographic well and then your your voice with his voice oh it's gonna be great so we started doing these instagram lives and i'm like and one time we had todd frazier come on and give, like, takes about, like, Todd Frazier. It was 9 o'clock on a fucking Monday. And Todd Frazier is on our Instagram Live talking about how he hates ketchup packets. I'm, like, thinking to myself, this is fucking great. And someone comments, like, why is this free?

Like, question mark. And then it was like, wait a second, podcast. So, yeah, that's going to be rolling out after I finish this week of school. Crazy. These kids, man. That to be rolling out after I finish this week of school. Crazy. These kids, man. Alright, let's go meet Rico Bosco and play ATI. I appreciate it. សូវាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប� Thank you. Bye.