KFC Radio - CCK Podcast: A Love Letter for Kayce

Episode Date: May 20, 2019

Rone joins the show to relive the Sixers loss to Kawhi and the Raptors. Jared has never peed at any Barstool office. Pete vs Everybody. Hubbs vs women. YP, Boris and YP's penis are a phenomenon. And Keebler writes a love letter for Kayce.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's the CCK Podcast presented by Postmates. We're in the new office, week two here at the Barstool office. The kitchen is not yet complete, so we don't have our snacks. So I have no other choice but to resort to my favorite app, my favorite people, my favorite pastime, my favorite activity, and that's postmating all my food needs. I postmates my lunch. Now I got to postmates my mid-afternoon snack.

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Anything you want, anytime you want it, Postmates. It's the CCK Podcast, the second week here in the brand new barstool office the content is flying the stories are cooking radio is on a whole other level because the creative juices are flowing in a whole new setting um we got a call this week during radio that was i mean i i thought as a married man I was the most whipped person of all time. I thought over the years interacting with stoolies that I had heard all the stories of people being in relationships and being whipped and, you know, the crazy things that you do to put up with your significant other, mostly usually your girl. But we my guy Keebler called up CCK.

He's a he's a CCK alum. He always calls in. He's a up CCK. He's a CCK alum. He always calls in. He's a little midget. He's about five feet tall. And just casually, it wasn't even the point of his story, he ends up telling us that his boss one day sat in the toilet because his wife demanded he do so. He had left the toilet seat up one day.

She sat down and fell in. And then as retribution, as punishment, she made him do it himself. Like a goddamn dog, when you rub a dog's nose in the shit on the carpet, like trying to teach you a lesson. That, my friends, is the most pathetic thing I have ever heard

in the history of human relationships. I am fascinated. I am fascinated with relationships, with monogamy, with romantic, interactions stories tales the dynamic that exists between men and women or women and women men and men any sort of romantic relationship the length that we go to to try to just to i don't know what sometimes you're trying to hurt the person sometimes you're trying to salvage it sometimes Sometimes you're trying to salvage it. Sometimes you're just trying to survive and get through another day. Rather than break up, rather than just cool it and stop with all the fucking bullshit, we go through these crazy extreme lengths. And this shit right here, both her demanding that someone sit their ass down in a fucking toilet

and him agreeing. How do you acquiesce to that? How do you cave to that demand? Yeah, sure, honey. I'll put my bare ass inside the toilet. I'll soak my dick and balls with toilet water so that you stop fighting me to make up for the fact that I made a mistake. How in the world could you continue on with that relationship?

How could you ever look that girl in the eyes again? How is she ever going to take you seriously again? When the power struggle resumes, when you continue on with the relationship during the next fight, during the next discussion, the next time you're intimate, the next time you're trying to share a laugh, the next time she tries to do something nice for you, although it sounds like maybe this is not the type of woman who would make you, who would ever do something nice for you, the next time she buys you a gift or tries to be cutesy or sweet with you, aren't you just going to say,

bitch, you made me sit in a toilet. You degraded me to the point that I had to sit in a toilet for me to even resume being with you. For you to just simply tolerate my existence any further and continue in this relationship, you demanded that I soak myself with toilet water. And on the other side, the next time that this guy ever tries to put his foot down, the next time you ever try to say, hey, honey, listen, it really upsets me when you do X, Y, Z, or it really hurts my feelings when you said this. Can you change that? Hey, we got to have a talk. Like, this relationship's not working. I need you to do this. Or anytime maybe he makes a threat. Hey, I'm going to leave you, or you better cut it out, or I'm going to do X, Y, Z.

Yeah, right, hon. Yeah, right, bitch boy. I told you to sit in the fucking toilet, and you did that. I don't think I've ever heard anything quite as preposterous as that. I mean, you've got to be one sick, sadistic, twisted pup to take pleasure in someone doing that. I don't care how much your night got ruined by sitting in the toilet to, to, to, to make someone intentionally do that,

to degrade them like that, to relish the power that much that you force someone to lose all their dignity right in front of your face. I mean, I love, I hold a strong grudge and I love to win a good argument. I love to have the upper hand. You got to have hand in relationships, right? I love that, but not at that cost. Not at that level. I mean that you got something seriously deep, dark wrong with you. And, and for the guy, I mean, when you really, it's so funny when you think about the lengths that you go to in relationships. Like the whole point of a relationship is that you found someone that you can be with and be honest with and be vulnerable with. And they're doing something like that to you. Not even your worst enemy would shove you

in a toilet. Not even your worst enemy would demand that you splash around, go splish splash, taking a bath in a fucking toilet. How do you not? And honestly, the toilet thing is so far fetched that, you know, no one can relate to that, but you can relate to some of the shit that a girl or a guy might say to you or make you do or, or expect you to do in order to keep up with the relationship, you know, in order to keep someone happy or satisfied the lengths that you'll go to, instead of just being like, this is fucking crazy. You're not supposed to be doing this. Like I'm supposed to be able to live my life as is. And you're supposed to like me for that. It's talking about who you can talk to and can't talk to and where you can go and what you can do, the thoughts you can have, the clothes you can wear, I mean, some people

take this shit so fucking far, where it's like, you don't want me in a relationship, you want to break me down and build me up just as into the person you want me to be in that relationship, that's fucking crazy, and some of the shit that you, like, the mental terrorism that, that some people exhibit, and again, I mean, usually it's mostly chicks who are doing this kind of stuff. That shit is crazy, man. For all, you know, there's all sorts of types of abusive relationships. That shit might be the craziest. You break someone mentally.

You put someone in a fucking toilet. I'd rather someone just beat me. I'd rather someone just straight up hit me. I'd rather my wife just beat me than make me sit in a fucking toilet. I'll tell you what. There was a lot of calls this week. Shout out to Keebler. A lot of funny calls this week on the podcast.

We had George from Seattle. That was an all-time call. That was a moment. He just called in, and he let it rip for about two and a half solid minutes talking about god knows what sometimes you give people a platform you give somebody a platform and you let them go i mean he might have never stopped he might have never stopped if i didn't if i didn't intervene there uh we had doug he called in he was just just randomly snuck in a story about his mom being terminal with cancer like what that had nothing

to do with the whole fucking story. Along with some of the Barstool people, they joined the show. Rowan popped in. We went through all of his tweets during game seven of the Sixers series to watch him devolve as a human until he turned into a corpse that he wants someone to shit on. We had YP. He's been all over the place this week doing his dick dance with Boris. We had him battling. He had his

own little mental battle going on. He was talking about his mom versus Big Cat asking for the wiener dance. Jared was telling stories about when he was at the gym and he could hear people fucking Pete. We talked about Pete. He doesn't respect or like anybody in the office. A lot went on this last week at CCK

along with the toilet boy. So let's get into the best of from this week. It's brought to you by Quip. I got a Quip at home. Let me tell you something. I haven't been to the dentist in about 10, 15 years. No joke. Swear to God.

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been about 10 years since I've been to a dentist because in my head, I think you can, I don't think you need dentists. I can't believe the dentists are rich because if you floss and you brush, that's, that's it. Your teeth are clean. What else do you need the dentist for? Right? So I feel like, I mean, I don't floss, but whatever. I feel like I've been brushing my teeth enough. And then I got a quip and the quip you push the button and it starts vibrating and it vibrates for two minutes so you know exactly how long you need to brush have you ever brushed for a full two minutes it's fucking so long it's so long and it does these intermittent beeps where it's like uh buzzes where it's like all right time to move over to the left side time to move over to the right side time to move the top time to move to the bottom

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Rude! Rude! Rude! There's like screaming on the radio. You walked by at the wrong time, wrong place. Yeah, over here, I think. Broken brain, huh? I mean, he just... Kawhi just broke you, huh? I mean, he just, Kawhi just broke you, huh? I mean, I saw that string of tweets.

It was just, it was that. It was the ramblings of like a broken man. It's a full defeat. The double doink on the wrong side, you said. No, like. Karma comes around. And I wanted, like, right afterwards, my first tweet was shit on my carcass. And that's like, I really really i really meant every part of that like i wanted people i felt so bad that i wanted people to be mean to me like i wanted people sometimes

you want to just wallow fully into it like go through it all like i'm you wanted to feel the pain i know i'm at the bottom i'm at like the bottom of the barrel like let's like just let rock bottom be rock bottom and shit on my car case. Would you say this is rock bottom? I mean, Philly has had their fair share of tough moments. Now you've also had a couple good things happen recently. Well, one specifically, obviously. So maybe a little bit different, but you're a basketball guy. You're a process guy.

The fact that we thought that we could win is what makes it rock bottom. It's not rock bottom if you're the worst team in the league because you never had hope. Having hope and then having it seized away from you and then just being empty, dead, and you plan for a parade or you hope to be happy. I have plans for next Wednesday to be happy and do things, and now it's over. It's just as bad as it gets. What did you think about the scene with Joel Embiid and his girlfriend crying? I can't fault him for it.

I'm not mad at him for crying. Can you fault her for it? Yeah. What about her? What do you mean? What about her Joel Embiid and his girlfriend crying? I can't fault him for it. I'm not mad at him for crying. Can you fault her for it? Yeah. What about her? What do you mean? What about her? She looks ridiculous, dude. How?

She's trying to be like his boo thing. She's definitely ride or die. There's no question about that. She's super ride or die. But the making out was tough. I honestly think that if that was me and my girl was crying in public, it would make me stop crying because I'd be like, all right, we got to shape up here. People are around.

Yeah, it is a little bit uncomfortable. Why would you do it in front of people? The cameras, yeah. The crying make-out is like, what is going on here? Yeah, she's just kissing, and how far he had to bend over to go up. That's exactly what I said earlier. He must have really loose hammies. I think that the fact that he could get to that level and still be, he must do yoga to get down

to her level. But I mean, I would never do it, but i like to see my star player that invested in the team oh yeah oh yeah we don't blame him can we revisit rowan's tweets from last night yeah please and actually if we could even go back to the to pre-game okay a lot of like i've been waiting for game seven in toronto my whole life a lot of clips of him battling in toronto talking shit to the city joe Carter references, what's his name, the mayor, the governor, whatever the fuck that is. A lot of shit talking from Roan the battle rapper to the city of Toronto.

And you fast forward after the triple doink with Kawhi, and go ahead, let him rip. Been preparing for Game 7 in Toronto for years now. Sixers on pace to score 52 points. Dope. That was a negative one. I love what Brett Brown has done in the second quarter.

That was a positive one. Need the esteemed Mr. James Butler to show up in the second half. That was more positive. It was like, okay, we're doing something. I was starting to feel good at that point. I saw a path to victory. I'll tell you when I think you really got hope.

When you saw sign guy turn into dog mask guy. Yes, that was huge. That's when the Philly juice was rolling. Sign guy comes out and then suddenly it's like, okay, these are the types of moments that you have when you're building towards a championship. I agree. These are the fucking landmarks on the way. Yes. This folklore.

This happened in 2015 with the Mets. There was all these storylines like the rally parakeet and the guy who was crying and the mid-season move like these are sometimes you have to think about the Disney script and like this is being written

it's part of the script like the way that we're falling in love with these teams these players but then sometimes in the Disney script is the moment where you know you get stabbed

through the fucking heart I just took my heart rate it's 300 I was flying at one point I really I felt like my heart was beating through my chest just took my heart rate it's 300 i was flying at one point i really i felt like my heart was beating through my chest i took the heart rate and it was actually like 60 it was like very healthy well we're bloggers but that's high for me that was high for me i'm usually around 40 here comes james james james butler was it was happening it was like the self-fulfilling prophecy i said that he needed to come out.

He was starting to come to the forefront. I was starting to believe. I was swelling with pride. Nick Nurse looks like he's in a perpetual state of crippling anxiety. I, too, was in a perpetual state of crippling anxiety right there. I saw his reflection in myself. 333 minutes into the series, and it's still a complete deadlock. I did the math on that one.

48 times 6 plus 45. We had three minutes left in the series. 333 minutes, and we were tied. Our complete inability to get any shot off is befuddling. Anger. That one is anger. That's pure anger at the squad. I need them to do better.

I'm all the way there, emotionally invested. They can't come and meet me at the peak? All caps here. Oh, my sweet lord. And that's when I thought that we were in this to fucking win this. I had had a sip of my lucky ginger ale right at that moment. I'd been saving this ginger ale all day. It was frozen in the freezer.

I was sitting on it like a mama bird waiting for it to hatch. It had completely unfroze. I just cracked it and had my first sip of this lucky ginger ale and the Sixers right after that tied the game. I was like, okay, I'm doing it. I'm magic again.

And then it got bad. Shit on my corpse. Seconds later, shit on my corpse. And then it was just rock bottom. So this is what it's like to be on the other side of the double doink. JoJo sobbing. My heart is broken. My soul has been snatched.

I am void. I am void. I am void. Roll my body into a quarry somewhere. I'm leaving the country. Yeah, it was that bad. It was really that bad. I felt so fucking empty. But as a sports fan, like, who hasn't been there?

No, I know. You know what? You have the rare honor of when your team goes all in, when you make the Jimmy Butler move, when you do the Tobias Harris rental, I mean, you're playing for keeps there. There's no like, well, you know. The way that our roster was constructed,

it felt like we were like, if not the best roster in the league, one of the top two rosters in the league. Everything was aligned. And Boston gets bounced. They could have been your bugaboo. You're playing Toronto, which is, you know, they don't get over the hump. LeBron's out of the East. The stars look like they had aligned.

It looked like everything was perfectly right there for us. You forgot, though, that you're from Philly. I'm from Philly. You're from Philly, bro. The stars don't align for people like us, man. No, the stars fucking, they turn into meteors and shower on you and crush your house and fucking kill your family. They kill your family, but they don't kill you, you know?

Yeah, no. It's like, why don't you just kill me next time? It would be easier. Yes. But now I have to sit and watch everybody suffer around me. Now you're living the nuclear winter that comes from the meteor strike. At least Boston got down to free, though. That is.

You gotta turn a negative into a positive. I will say this. I would buy a shit on my corpse t-shirt. Shit on my corpse is the new line. The process. The final step of the process is shitting on a corpse. Every time a Philly team

loses, shit on my corpse. Just put trust the process, put a huge line right through it and just do shit on my corpse. The put trust the process, put a huge line right through it, and just do shit on my court. The Phillies are 23 and 16. They're in first place. Oh, that's nice. That's really inspiring.

What's that, a silver lining? No, I was going to say, you bring back the young pieces. Obviously, Bud is Tobias Harris, Jimmy Butler. Are these guys in the future, or do you not even want them? I know I want to run it all back. I want to run back. Obviously, I want to re-sign Jimmy Butler.

I'll give him all the money. I don't want to give Tobias Harris $150 million, but I want to give him a decent amount of money, and I want to have Brett Brown back. I want to have pretty much the same lineup and hope that we can move forward and galvanize as a team, and hopefully the East is a little bit worse. You know what the problem is, though, is Giannis. Oh, yeah, he's terrifying.

Oh, LeBron's out of the East. Well, guess what? You might have a bigger problem on your hands. Dude, or if you guys get Kevin Durant, that's a huge problem for us. Zion. Zion could be another problem. And that's why it seemed like this year it seemed like it was there for the taking. Yeah, I mean, even on the West Coast, you know, if the Rockets could have squeaked it out,

or even if the Warriors still do maintain, like, they're not what they once were. Exactly. The Trailblazers are very beatable. This was the year, dude. Damn, dude, it sucks so bad. I've been down so earnestly. Like, it's not an act how bad I'm down. I try to, like, listen to other people talk about it.

I'm shutting off programs. I don't want to hear anybody's fucking opinions. I used to do a media blackout when my team's lost. It's almost impossible now because it's your entire life. But I don't want to hear any of it. Anytime one of my teams loses, I just don't watch anything. And the fact that it was that dramatic of a shot, you're going to be seeing him get low.

You're going to be seeing his reaction. Dude, it bounced four times. How does it bounce four times? A double-double doink. I need sports science on that. I know it was 18.2 feet in the air, the ball at the peak. I want to hear about the backspin. I want to know about how soft and how hard it can bounce on the rim.

I think it's a full one in a million. It really is. I think one million times that shot gets taken in an empty gym. You can't hit the rim four times. It's impossible. It's damn near impossible. I watched Steve Kerr do a quick little breakdown, and it was interesting. He said the rule of thumb in basketball is you get a dribble per second.

And so Kawhi took exactly four dribbles. He said most guys are going to pull up at the wing. Kawhi has his internal clock, whether or not he really thinks these things or not. He is the type of player. He's a robot. He makes those extra dribbles. JoJo, he jumps early, so he couldn't – like when he finally jumps to try to block the shot, it was after like a little hop, so he couldn't get like a full

jump, and that allows you to get – But I felt so good about the shot that he took because it looks like he's double teamed. It looks like it's a bad shot. He's fading away. The final seconds of the shot clock, he's going away from the basket. Playing defense, you'll sign for that shot a million times. Marty Mush even said if J.J. Redick is guarding him,

he probably misses the shot because he didn't have to put so much arc on it. It was the perfect storm. But I will say if I am convincing myself how this is a positive, a loss like this will teach you something about yourself as a person. And I really hope, especially Joel Embiid, we saw how he's wearing his emotions on his sleeve. You have to hope that this is going to teach him to be a bigger man, a better man, a more fierce competitor.

From one loser to another, you sound like the biggest fucking loser. Here's a silver lining, though. Here's a silver lining. You're talking about how you like to see his emotion. Think about people who like the Celtics. Kyrie doesn't give a fuck. So think about that. At least your player, he's crying.

He's making out with his girlfriend. She's crying. People in Boston are just like, I don't even want to resign this guy. We're not even better than the Celtics, though. We were discussing what would you do if your lady, Jared, said he would just fuck his girl. I would love that. I feel like that's such a turn on. If you are so overcome with emotion that you start crying and your girl can relate to your emotions so much that she starts crying, I'll go from sad to like this is kind of hot.

Dude, JJ is not – or JoJo is not getting it up for a month. No, that's fine. His dick's broken. I guarantee that. Speaking of which, do you have your own logo by any chance? Not right now. I have like a Roan logo that I used to use. Why?

You got a logo for me? No, I was just going to say like you're going to want to put a logo of yours on like a shit on my corpse t-shirt or else people are going to think it's a Call Her Daddy shirt. Goddamn. It does sound like a next episode. Let's get Trigg on the case He'll draw you A nice little cartoon

Of your corpse And poop falling on it Sixers Nation Yeah if people want to Really like At underscore Roan Just like say the meanest Stuff to me right now

Because I'm still At a full period Of wallowing In abject sadness Right now you're Right now you've just been Dumped and you're listening To like the sad songs

You know what I mean Like you just want to fully feel it. You just want to cry. So yeah, send Roan mean stuff about the sexes. It's like that shade of black that absorbs 96% of light. Yeah, the darkest black. I'm in the purest darkness that I could be in right now. That new crayola color is called Roan.

Exactly. That's where I'm at right now. It's called shit on my corpse. Look at the crayon called Shit on my corpse Look at the crayon Shit on my corpse Exactly Alright man Keep your head up Thanks guys

Love you Rowan You'll probably win Next year man Don't worry Trust the process Rowan Just trust the process Just keep trusting You trust that process baby

What a great marketing ploy By the Philadelphia 76ers Like We talk about the potential Sixers fans Were so gassed up For nothing but draft picks by the Philadelphia 76ers. We talk about the potential. Sixers fans were so gassed up for nothing but draft picks that they were the most passionate fan base out there with not a goddamn product on the court. Like watching fucking basically amateur guys,

like D-League scrubs out there. But they were just all gassed up because they had draft picks or they had an injured player who was coming back next year. And then when you see the potential come to fruition, and it's good, but it's not like greatness, you kind of wish you were just rooting for draft picks again. I can't wait to root for draft picks tomorrow night. I mean, right now, yeah. I am so fired up.

We're not even rooting for the right to pick, you know what I mean? At no point did I ever truly get excited for, like, the Celtics playoff run because I knew that, A, the team was a disaster, B, even if you got to the finals, you were just going to get smoked by Golden State anyway. So I have been waiting weeks and weeks and weeks for the lottery. The Phoenix motherfucking sons. George from Seattle, what you got on the NBA playoffs?

Hey, man, I'm tellingattle what you got on the nba playoffs hey man i'm telling you what i hope i trust the process i'd rather you know god forbid i'm a laker fan and you know the celtics just really i can't understand what the situation is with kairi but i'm gonna tell you this the disaster that is the lakers is a travesty in professional sports. Who the hell is the GM of the Lakers and what the hell are they doing hiring a three-time fired coach with nobody who was a has-been before he was an anybody? It makes no sense to me. Jeannie Buss, what the hell is this bitch up to, man?

She don't know what the hell, where her head is she can't tell the difference between her head up her own ass or up jerry or up phil jackson's ass i don't know what the hell this team is about then you've got palinka come on man half the league hates this guy all right who's going to sign with lebron in la what what the hell is going on there and I you know I'll tell you what the the LA Lakers Jerry Buss has got to be rolled over in his grapes so much he's probably in China somewhere right now you know it's just ridiculous it's a freaking joke I don't know why the hell the commissioner doesn't say you know what Je, Jeannie, you know, maybe you need to go find somebody, you know, that can handle the team because you obviously can't prove a damn thing.

You know, this is just like a joke out there. And it's just tough to me, boys. You know, I'd rather, you know, I'd rather have a team like the Clippers or maybe the Nuggets, you know, or Spurs or whatever. How the hell do the Spurs keep competitive for 20 years? And the Lakers haven't made a playoff in what now, seven years? It's like a joke out there.

It's pathetic. Let it all out. I tell you what, it's just bitch. This lady just cannot get her head out of her ass. And Linda Rambis, what the hell is a Linda Rambis? What the hell, you know? What the hell is a Linda Rambis doing making player personnel decisions? Her husband was a has-been before he ever was as well. You know, come on, man.

What the hell is going on there? My 12-year-old son could be a gm than this shit that's going on over there he could come on you know it's like a joke and i'm ranting and banting and i appreciate you giving me the time to do that but it's a travesty of justice what one of the greatest sports franchises in all of professional sports is up to these days you know at least the celtics made the playoffs at least the 76ers had a process. We have a disaster. That's what we have in L.A.

Disaster. Go off, King! Go off, King! George from Seattle, undoubtedly the call of the week. I'm calling it right now. It is Monday at 225. That is the call of the week. Just so you know, you got a standing ovation from everyone behind the glass.

That was so good. Zah was literally jumping in the air at one point. That was unreal. I mean, every time I thought there was going to be a lull, it just went from a, it's a joke and another thing. That was something special. Oh, that was so good. I mean, I feel like right now you're either doing that about your sports teams

or Game of Thrones and you just can't stop. No. There's just too much to be said. I mean, he's not wrong. Everything he said was true. You know how much better he feels right now, though? He just got all that out on national radio. I think he realized towards the end, he's like, all right, I know you're letting me ran here.

I know you're letting me do my thing. I mean, that was a solid certain threshold where you're like, oh, they're letting me go with this. He probably forgot he was on national radio. He probably was just like just streamlining consciousness like out of his mouth. his fucking eyes rolled to the back of his head he just went to hate the nicks mode when he said this bitch i was like yeah he forgot he forgot where he was what the hell is a linda rams man that's what that's what you get uh the x factor of national radio is that like you know this is some dude in seattle who's a lakers fan who's just so beside himself right now i'm happy to give you that platform let's take some calls here

doug what's up doug doug hey first of all love you guys second of all i don't care what anybody says i don't look at you guys as a podcast as a podcast or radio show that hates cancer, terminal illness, or anything. My mother has been cancer-full. She's terminal, but she has not died yet, and I feel like a lot of that contributes to you guys talking shit about everything. I love you guys. Second of all, Kevin Clancy. So here's the thing.

I grew up in Jersey. Nobody is a huge fan of the Mets in Jersey in general, from what I've found. And rather than being a Yankee fan, I conceded and became a Brewers fan. What, like, I don't know. When you have a team with a salary cap such as the Mets do, which is greater than a lot of teams in the MLB, I just generally don't understand what kept you with that team, regardless of all the years of terrible, terrible, terrible playing. Well, Doug, let me tell you something. We have a shirt on sale right now.

Thank you for the incredibly wacky call. That was hard to follow. Best of luck to your mother. I'm sorry about your mom. I don't know what that had to do with us. That's real. The music effect is real. I'm sorry about your mom. I don't know what that had to do with us. That's real. The music effect is real. Yeah.

Well, of course it is. That's why people have sex playlists. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I don't have a sex playlist. What? I don't have a sex playlist. I don't have sex. I have a gym playlist.

Well, everybody has a gym playlist. Yeah, because I go to the gym. Do people work out without listening to music? I did that last night, actually. It was miserable. But they have music on in the gym. Do people work out without listening to music? I did that last night, actually. It was miserable. But they have music on in the gym. No. Well, so I was here last night for the draft lottery,

and then I came back to my apartment at probably like 11.30, and my gym was closed. And I've lived in my apartment for almost two years now, and I've never used the apartment gym. And I was like, you know what? I went last night. I couldn't go tonight because of the whole draft thing that we were doing let me just let me just like see what they have in here and i went in i was like they have enough for me to get by with a workout right now

so i did and there was no music on it was dead actually it was so quiet that whoever's apartment is next to the gym. I heard this chick getting plowed as I was doing fucking hammer curls. There's no like where's the gym in the middle of just the middle of the building? The lobby. You walk into the lobby is right across from the desk. Yeah. The fact that you couldn't turn like a TV on or something. They didn't have that.

Yikes. Yeah. I mean have that? Oh, yikes. Yeah. That sounds like prison. You literally are working out in a jail gym. No, I mean, it didn't... They had no TVs, no music, and you just had a couple dumbbells? It's an apartment gym. What do you expect? Do you have a gym in your apartment?

I do. Is it nice? There's a pool. There's a pool. Yeah I do. Is it nice? There's a pool. There's a pool. Yeah. Is the gym nice? It's alright. Enough to get by. There's TVs though. All the apartment gyms. I don't use it very often. This room that we're in right now, and I know that's

not helping the listeners, but it's not very big. It's about this size. Yeah, I mean it's an apartment gym. It's nothing to write home about. It's weird that they didn No. But it's about this size. Yeah. I mean, it's an apartment gym. It's nothing to write home about. It's weird that they didn't have anything to listen to. Like, at least a shitty TV in the corner you could put, like, you said you went late at night. I'm sure most people just bring their iPhones or whatever.

Yeah, I guess. I just can't imagine. Now I can't even imagine walking around the city without something in my ears. That sounds weird. It's like driving. Like, do you drive in silence? well that sounds weird it's like driving like do you drive in silence I sure don't well then why would you walk in silence no I'm commuting well I mean you're safe in your car from the outside world not so much yeah but you're walking down the street that's what I get like first of all I don't I'm a fast walker as it is always always have been, but I fucking hate slow walkers, especially in airports. They're the worst.

But when people get mad in New York, when people are buzzing by them or trying to get out of the way, I'm like, well, on the highway, if you're driving 20 miles an hour and the speed limit is 80, you're going to have people mad at you. You're going to be honking. People are not going to like that. Well, that's the same thing here. My highway commute is now walking in the city. Don't walk slow.

Yeah, I have a question. Get out of the fucking way. So I don't know where, like. I don't know how we got here, but now I'm so heated thinking about slow walkers. Yeah. Do you hate slow walkers as much as I do? Yeah, I mean, I'll just go around them. Yeah, but sometimes you can't.

It's like when you come out of the subway, I know you don't take the subway because you're too good for it. I am. And people stop right at the top of it to like check their maps or try to figure out where they're going. Like, get out of the way. Yeah. Or when they... It's Manhattan.

Just move. I ordered the... I'm so mad. Zah. Zah. Am I going crazy right now? No, that irritates me. Okay.

In the world's most populous city, most dense city, someone just decides to stand right in the middle of the walkway? Thank you. That's annoying. I knew you'd have my back. No, that I don't have your back. Yeah, but you just reacted like, oh, it's not that big of a deal. Like, I feel like anybody who lives in New York City or commutes to New York City and has to get around that's not just there for the weekend hates tourists and hates people because it'd be like if a slow car was just driving in front of you your entire way to work in any other city it's the worst the good thing is though you can

definitely go around them oh yeah yeah but sometimes you can't sometimes you can't like when they have a whole family that's just spread out across the the sidewalk and they all stop to take pictures and you're like, listen, I can't. I'd like to go around you, but I can't because there's a bunch of cars in my way. Yeah. I don't want to get hit by a car necessarily. Yeah. So I'll just have to barrel through.

Yeah. What did you do last night, Casey? I watched the NBA lottery. I watched the Boston Bruins game. Yep. And I had dinner with one of my girlfriends. One of your girlfriends from? Texas.

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. What'd you do, Jared? I was here. Other than watch the Suns, yeah? That was it. But we haven't even mentioned the Bruins yet.

They're going to sweep. I don't know. It might be a, I'm calling a gentleman sweep. Yeah? Yeah. I think they get it done in five. I just want, I want it to be, you know, and I've said this before, like, I don't know I'm calling a gentleman sweep I think they get it done in five I want it to be and I've said this before

I don't give a shit about hockey it's so much fun to watch the Stanley Cup playoffs how terrible do you feel right now if you're Frankie Borelli knowing that you were an Islanders fan and they just got dusted by a team that's about to get dusted the only reason that Frankie probably isn't trying to

off himself right now is because the PGA Championship is this weekend. So he's out at Bethpage. And they're killing it right now. They're foreplay's doing so many interviews. I know the video with Kevin Kisner is coming out. But Frankie has to be humiliated deep down. But he's just going to use the goal. I mean, they were standing basically with Tiger Woods yesterday.

Saw that. That was incredible. Not basically. They were. The pictures of them, just like the still shots, it's great. Yeah. If that wasn't happening, Frankie would probably be a lot more deflated than he is right now. Because the fact that they could not beat this team.

It's a nice distraction for him, but you know that when he goes to bed at night, that's what he's thinking about. For sure. And then they're going to have to do at night, that's what he's thinking about. For sure. And then they're going to have to do radio the Stanley Cup playoffs. That's going to be tough. And I hope it's the Blues just for content purposes. YP. And Riggs.

YP will not go. Riggs is a St. Louis guy, but I feel like he's not like repping the Blues hard enough. YP is going to have sex with his rat. Yes. A chinchilla, but he calls it his rat. Like, that's just going to happen. But the difference is, is that I don't think YP will go, like, toe-to-toe with Dave. I think he's too scared to.

Riggs will. Oh, for sure. Riggs will. Riggs will, but it's going to be, it's not going to be authentic. No, I think. Like, YP goes nuts for the blues. Well, right. It's, I mean that that storyline itself i mean just yp on his complete own yeah is this is fun to watch yeah i don't know i mean how

did you see dan like all up in his mentions during the last stream did you see all this no so yp i think he either wrote a blog about or he tweeted He said he had the good angel on his shoulder and the bad angel on his shoulder. So his mom was watching the stream, YP's mom, and was like texting him, telling him to stop talking about his penis. And then you had Dan, big cat, who obviously is watching with everybody else and it's barstool, big cat's popping up. So everybody's egging him on,s asking him to show his dick. To show it? Yeah. So you've got this juxtaposition where YP's doing this dance, which is not safe for work.

It's not safe for the internet. It makes me uncomfortable. I don't know what he's going to do at this point if he's doing it this way in the conference finals, and then they make it to the Stanley Cup finals, how much more can you get? And then, God forbid for all of us, if they win the Stanley Cup. Yeah, I think at some point,

depending on the caliber of victory and depending on the opponent that the victory happens against. It's going to be against the Bruins. It could be. It's going to be against the Bruins. It's going to be against the Bruins. It could be. It's going to be against the Bruins. It's going to be against the Bruins. Barring some massive.

He's got to go dick in a sock. He's got to go full dance with the short. I mean, he wears the same shorts like every day, I feel like. With Boris? Yep. So he's going to do the dance with Boris. Shorts got to come down, but his dick's got to be in a sock. Do you think that Boris, I don't know enough about chinchillas.

Do you think Boris has any idea what's going on? Or he thinks he's just being thrown around in the air for a couple minutes every couple days, and he's just like, whatever. I think Boris is pretty in tune with what's going on. The fact that Boris just gets to run loose in his apartment is wild. Well, have you been to YP's apartment? I'm assuming not. I have not.

It's quite the scene. Boris is just on the loose? Yeah. Boris is just like a roommate. So it's one of those things where Boris is, you know, there's three of them that live there, which is nice. And that's why if the Blues do win, you, again i don't i don't i know you're you grew up a big bruins person like i don't care about hockey i went to forget that by the way i didn't i don't forget it season two i was a bruins season ticket holder up until

we had them for like a few years that's when we got the red socks season yeah so you grew up a hockey person obviously living in the part of the country that you did. I went to games when they were good, when the stars were good, in like the 90s. I never cared about it. For YP, if the Blues do win the Stanley Cup, you have to be so happy because it would make his entire life. It would make his entire life. Maybe we'll talk to him

after this break. I don't want to talk about his dick. I don't want to talk about his dick, but maybe we'll talk about what he has to do to one-up himself after this break. We'll be right back with more CCK. In the same breath, I was ready to declare the internet dead and devoid of humor after seeing this rig shit, this hub shit. This shit. It is.

As a girl who likes to take a lot of pictures for Instagram This is outrageous This whole week to me People not Joel Embiid crying with his girlfriend And now these girls at the Yankees game So just for context Hubs got sent a video Yankee fan at the stadium the other day for a day game

Videoed these girls Posing for Instagram And it wasn't just posing This girl, I mean she's a real life model She was doing like model posing videoed these girls posing for Instagram. And it wasn't just posing. This girl, I mean, she's a real life model. She was doing like model posing, like Vogue, like pose like this, pose like that. Like move your hand, move your hair, turn around. The whole thing. And her friend was doing like a burst of pictures.

They must have taken like hundreds and hundreds of photos. Now, it wasn't like in the middle of a crowd, but the game was going on. The game was happening. These are clearly girls who don't care about baseball. She is fucking gorgeous. She's an absolute rocket and a great model, I'm sure. She's from France. She's a French model.

Yeah. And the reaction that Hubs garnered from posting it saying like – I think he said like when's the next plague, meaning like get rid of these people. And I don't know what his blog said. But the amount of people on Twitter who first of all thought that Hubs took the video himself, which is – that does change things a little bit because it does look like – the person who did film it has some commentary kind of being like, oh my god, can you believe this? And it does come across a little bit like,

yo, dude, why are you filming these two girls? But first of all, that's how the world works nowadays. You do something silly in public. Everyone else says, you're filming something with your phone. I'm filming mine. I'm filming it with mine. And when you are in a public place like that at a baseball game, which you're not there for the baseball.

You're there for your Instagram moment. That's a little bit silly and shallow. And you take a thousand pictures posing and all that shit. And not posing and you can't. It's not even just posing. Yeah, it's not just like, hey, take a picture with me and my friends. It looks like you're on a red carpet. I saw people, somebody posted their own pictures being like, hey, Hubs, look, I took a picture at a baseball game last week.

Am I crazy too? And it was just them, like one picture with a friend. This was like you're on the catwalk. You're in Sports Illustrated. You're trying to be sexy. You're trying to be hot. It's all good. But if you do that stuff, you open yourself up to be made fun of.

What you're doing is a little bit silly. It's a little bit vain. It's a little bit superficial. If you're a baseball fan, you probably look at that and go, what the fuck are we doing here? I thought we were here to watch a baseball game, not to do a modeling shoot. These are all natural reactions to something that is pretty unusual to see. And it went on for so long. I mean, like comically long.

Again, if two girls just took a picture, fine, whatever. The amount of posing she did and the amount of pictures they took was so unusually over the top that this is what barstool is made of we're not talking about the x's and o's on the field we're talking about the silly weird things that you see during the game in the stands as a fan two girls doing a full-blown photo shoot is exactly what barstool is made of and anybody and so the reaction online was like you you know, stop shaming these girls or stop taking pictures of them. Why aren't you allowed to do this, that, the other thing. Again, what you're doing is a little bit funny. And then the people being like, well, what if this was two guys?

You're being sexist. If this was two guys, we would stop the fucking presses. Every show would be talking about it. Every blog would be talking about it. We would never stop making fun of those guys forever if there was a guy spinning around in circles which is what she's doing with her hands over her head like she you know she she's doing like the sexy post which again who cares like i'm a i'm a huge proponent of who gives a fuck what people want to put on instagram i do not care we've talked about this before like you either have to go full-blown thirst trap or all, because you're going to get judged no matter what.

If a guy was doing what that girl did by himself, because that's the thing is it's not too, if for anybody who's not seen the video, it's not two girls posing together and somebody taking it. It's one girl and her ride or die friend just snapping away, which is a funny thing that one minute for one minute 60 seconds think about how many times you could snap your camera in 60 seconds how many poses you can do in a full 60 seconds and every account that we run the barstool sports instagram the chicks account the college the fifth year account girls of instagram is like a thing we we all have seen the shot on the beach where you you pan the beach and there's like several couples all taking

pictures in the water you see girls like trying to get the perfect angle for their girlfriend girls literally holding their boobs right like right we've seen that where girls will get underneath their friend and hold their boobs up just for a better selfie yeah which by the way i don't have i don't think i have a friend that would do that for me i've never asked that but i don't feel like you have a friend who would do that and then you I've never asked that, but I don't feel like – You have a friend who would do that, and then you would get roasted for it, which is what's going on. These girls are absolutely allowed to do this, and it's not like we're calling them like – I don't think they're bad people. No, it's just funny. I just think that they did something that's pretty quirky and funny and silly, and you're getting made fun of for it.

It fucking happens on the internet, man. And all Hubs tweeted. Again, it does look like he took the video because of the way he quote tweeted. He just put big, in all caps, baseball fan at the Yankees game today. Fair. Right.

He's making fun of the fact that these girls are not really there for the baseball. They're there for the Instagram pictures. Who cares if they are? They're going to get made fun of. You have to understand. Are you talking about women hating Hubs? I was going to say, you must love this piece of shit.

But the best part is that the girl totally, I mean, I think she's doing it unironically, but she like is kind of leaning into it. Oh, she knows exactly what she's doing. But she's like, oh, haters are going to hate. Here are the actual photos. And like, she looks like a fucking smoke show in them. But then she's also retweeting a lot of girls who are not doing it as a joke like they're like oh he's just a bad person whatever so it makes me think i don't

think she i think she knows exactly what she's doing oh i know she definitely knows exactly what she's doing get her exposure and i think that she is liking the people who are like you know this was offensive to talk about or whatever you don't i mean she definitely knows what she's doing she definitely i mean she like doing. She definitely, I mean, she like added her Instagram to the thread. But I do think

just reading a lot of the stuff that she retweeted, that she might actually feel like she was wronged in some way by being filmed. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, like she,

I think that that girl thinks that like, Hubs talking about it, the person filming it is somehow like a gross, you know, miscarriage of justice. And it's like,

if you are going to behave a little bit silly in public, which is, I'm just calling it that because it's not like you're doing anything wrong. Yeah. It's not like you deserve

to be like vilified. If someone was like, look at this fucking slut. Look at this whore. It'd be like, yo, what are you talking about? But Hubs being like, look at this big baseball fan, huh this whore. It'd be like, yo, what are you talking about? But Hubs being like, look at this big baseball fan. Look at this girl who's only there for Instagram.

And they're going so over the top with their poses and their amount of pictures. These are very – and same thing with Joel Embiid crying. If you cry when you lose a game, you get made fun of. If you're a girl at a – if you're anybody at a sporting event and you're treating it like it's your personal catwalk, you're going to get made fun of if you're a girl at a at a at a if you're anybody at a sporting event and you're treating it like it's your personal catwalk you're gonna get made fun of and the world will keep spinning no one is saying you should like be in jail no one is saying that like you know there's a problem with it but it's a fucking scumbag move you know the fact that he filmed it himself too is crazy yeah that i that – I mean lesson learned where usually if you get sent a video, if you can tweet, post, or blog an original video, it's usually the way to do it, right? Like you have the original copy.

Yeah. But here's one instance where had you quote tweeted someone else or you quote tweeted a burner account or something to let it be known this was not me taking it yeah uh probably would have but he did he did he was he was i heard that he was like drooling while he was he's perverted i heard he was stalking them yes touching himself you should see what he did after he stopped recording that fucking pervert it was disgusting i i and the poor girl i mean she's obviously just trying to get some pics for instagram and at the end of the day that's kind of what we're all doing here uh so i didn't think It was disgusting. The poor girl. I mean, she's obviously just trying to get some pics for Instagram. And at the end of the day, that's kind of what we're all doing here. So I didn't think she did anything wrong.

I will say that the guys at Barstool understand it a lot more than normal guys. Guys don't want to take pictures of girls. People at Barstool, though, they're like, well, yeah, because we're all doing it for social media. So in here, nobody's going to look at that and be like, damn, Hubs, you shouldn't have posted that. It's like, well, no, every single person would have posted it. The thing thing was kevin i didn't think it was that weird that she was doing that i mean me personally i have taken like a photo session like that for for people like before it's just i've never you know it's not weird it's not weird to do shit like but that's what i'm saying is that it's not weird for you to do it. It's like when we went day drinking on Saturday and like PFT is taking

pictures of his own drinks and he's like, alright, I'll executive produce yours. But it's like we all are doing that. People in Yankee Stadium are going to look at that and think it's silly. Those fucking animals at Yankee Stadium. I think it's just... Yeah, they're going to look at that and be like, what the fuck? It's jealousy. It's jealousy. Because they're all like, hey, 25, 7 rings

and get this and that. Hey, you fucking... Why can't the pretty girl take pictures at the? It's jealousy. It's jealousy because they're all like, hey, 25, seven rings and get this and that. Hey, you fucking – why can't the pretty girl take pictures at the game? She can. It's sexist. She is so pretty. Yeah. You missed what we said. I think we should offer – you know what?

I will take you out. I'd love to. She's going back to France. Well, I will – next time you come over here, you can – I will take you out to dinner as an apology. She's from France? I creeped through her – again, I saw Keith's tweet last night that was like the fact that Hubs is getting dragged is hilarious.

So I went and looked. She's interacting with everybody, but she also posted like a picture. I think it was on the Brooklyn Bridge maybe where she was like the French girl's last day in New York and then all the Yankees pictures. She's probably like, I took New York by storm. Oh, yeah.

I mean, she's got to post like a slideshow of all of them. She did. All of them? No, but a lot of slideshow of all of them. She did. All of them? No, but a lot of them. A lot of them. Love that. And she said, haters are going to hate. Here they are.

It's perfect. It's perfect. Own it, girl. Her reaction is awesome. It's fine. It's the white knights of the internet. Like, come on. It's just disgusting that she even has to address it because of somebody like fucking

Hubs. Like, why can't she just live by herself in peace without ridicule from the internet, which was the fire was started by hubs. What would happen if a girl was doing that at Fenway? I mean, I don't care if open, open their arms.

I would love it. Take the pictures for her. Yeah. I mean, I would take the pictures for Jared's taking pictures of me at Fenway before. Yeah. Like,

I don't, I don't care about that at all. Like if it's pictures for her. Yeah. It's, you know, you're trying to capture a moment in time that means a lot to you so actually what they did was capture a thousand moments right right so that's why disgusting misogynistic pig

hubs was trying to make it seem like oh like she's not paying attention to the game she doesn't care she cares a lot because she wants to remember this moment forever it was so impactful for her yeah it was such a deep moment that meant so much to her that she had to immortalize it forever forever and you know who ruined it hubs yankee fan hopes you know what in fact this never fn way never fn way would that have happened no the spin zone on it too is that a lot of times if you don't post pictures from games like that then people assume that you're not there yeah and then if you do post pictures from games like that then it's like oh you only went there to take the photo so she just leaned right into it she was like you

know what i was here damned if you don't yeah definitely yeah i mean i got shame for taking a picture outside of fenway one time yeah well because you weren't going and you but i did go to i went to every other game but that one. But you did. Yeah, that's fine. And I like, then I was at the World Series

and they're like, are you actually there? And it's like, well, I wasn't allowed to take pictures inside because Dave wouldn't let me. But that's beside the point. I had to post them the next day.

If I looked like that girl, I would do a photo shoot every fucking where I went. It looks like she does. I would have a videographer everywhere I went all the time because it'd be like, everywhere that I go, I make prettier.

Like, hey, look at this beautiful day at Yankee Stadium. Put me in it. Goes up like 100%. So, fine. Take all the pictures you want. Internet. Slowly roll. People just like to be angry. People just like to be angry. And Hubs, I mean, his anger is what started other people's anger.

Hubs was like, I can't believe someone is trying to take pictures during my baseball game. Who's Hubs? What? Who is Kareem Garcia? Exactly. Who is Eric Hubs? Who is Hubs to say who can and can't take pictures at Yankee Stadium? Jared, you know what I think you need to do?

What? You need to go to Yankee Stadium. And take pictures? And do a photo shoot. Just like that. Not just take pictures. In a black crop top. Casey's got them now.

I have. Yeah. We're selling Viva. Casey's got a Viva crop top for you. Sure are. I'll wear one. I got one on my desk. We'll put you right behind home plate.

Okay. Oh, that would be so funny. The Yankees come to town and, I mean, the Red Sox come to Yankee Stadium at the end of the month, I think. Let's go. Could be. And you have to get the twirl down. Because we were talking about that.

You're allowed to make fun of somebody. You think I can't twirl? No, no, no. No, I think you need to do exactly what she... She's obviously a professional model. Let me see. Give me a twirl. Yeah, stand up and do what she did.

Put your hands above your head. Do the whole thing. What terrible... Oh, wow. Oh, yeah, yeah. Look back at me, daddy. Look back at me. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah. I mean... We got to get you in a... Watch out. What's her me. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I mean, watch out. What's her name? Jessica something? I don't know. Watch out, girl. You got competition. I mean, just wait until I'm there at the end of the month.

I mean, I'm not joking. No, we have to. We're going to get you in a Viva crop top, and we're just going to have Brent out there just taking. No, actually, it needs to be a guy that's taking the pictures. That makes it funnier. Because it makes it funnier. Like we were saying earlier before you got in here. It's a little sexist.

No. People are saying we wouldn't have made – or hubs wouldn't have made fun of it if it was two dudes, and we said, in fact, it would be the opposite. Is that the most misguided the internet has ever been? We would make fun of – That it was two dudes? They were like, this is sexist that Barstool is making fun of girls. If it was two guys taking pictures, they would never make fun of it. Everything would shut down.

I mean. It would shut down the company. Like the whole internet would be like talking about nothing but the guys who were posing sexy at Yankee Stadium. Correct. Right. Get the fuck out. That's a bad take. So that's what you need to do.

But really what it comes down to is. I think Casey should do it to kind of repay the favor. Casey's Twitter picture, that was from a picture burst of 6,000 pictures that I took to get that one. Which one is my Twitter photo? The Barstool versus the World one. Actually, I don't think that one was done by you. Yes, it was. Show it to me. Put your laptop around.

No, I know that you took some of these pictures, but I think that this one actually might have been a marina one because i think i did multiple takes that day sorry all right then that day i i took 500 but again i understand that and but i i'm going back to this inside barstool it's not a weird thing to ask correct because you guys all have a social media yeah you guys get it like i i took a picture of pft uh drinking the same margarita that i was because we had a group and i was sitting across from him he then he executed bruise that's what we do here but in public out in the wild it is seen as as weird yeah if you don't get it all right we get it comes down to a bitter yankee fan who's upset that his team hasn't won a title in what 10 years it's a decade-long drought people were in college what if we make Hubs? A decade-long drought. People were in college still. What if we make Hubs take the picture of Jared?

Yeah, that should be the punishment for such online vitriol. That's how he makes it up to the world. And then one of us is behind Hubs showing that Hubs is taking it. And we can do the same commentary. He's paying his debts to society. I've had an idea, and we've talked about this. The making of photos or videos like that would be a killer Instagram. Yeah.

My ex-boyfriend used to do that to me every time that I would be taking a picture of my drink or my food or girl. Like he would take a picture of me doing it. Boyfriends of Instagram. It's so funny. The boyfriend who's like sitting in the pool, like taking the picture like a poor schlep. But people could start sending it in. Like here's my idiot girlfriend laying down on the floor taking a picture of her Christmas

tree. Start that account right now. Okay. Let's start it. Behind the gram. It should be like boyfriend. It should be girlfriends of boyfriends on Instagram. Okay. Behind. Let's start it. Behind the gram. It should be like boyfriend. It should be girlfriends of

boyfriends on Instagram. Yeah. But you could I mean even my girlfriends that do it I've taken funny videos of them doing

because it is funny how much goes into it. Well yeah it's funny how we're all fucking vain and superficial. Yeah. It is.

I mean. Anytime a girl starts a sentence with that. It's funny. Run away. It's just funny how. I just think it's

funny how you. See ya. See ya later. It's funny. Run away. It's just funny how... I just think it's funny how you... See ya! See ya later! Fucking see ya! Phone's ringing. See ya later. Your hair is on point these days, Zah.

Yeah, Zah, you're looking good these days. You came in totally head-shaved, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I've been growing out since... Yeah, so since...

Actually, since I left my brother's crib because he's the one that used to cut my hair. So since about... So it's just about you lost your barber, basically. Yep, since October. Since October your barber, basically. Yep.

Since October. Since October. Now, where are you living, Zaha? I live over in Jersey City. With? By myself. Well, three other – But no other barstool?

No, no barstool. I don't do barstool. Barstool, my man. I don't do barstool. I understand that you kind of have to. A lot of people move here for barstool. They don't know anybody else. They want to live in the city.

They need to split up rent. Living with people from Barstool is crazy town. It's crazy. I don't know. I mean, you found the right... You're with Trent? He's by himself. Me? I'm by myself.

You were with Trent? Never. Never. He just hangs out with Trent. Trent and Bob live together. That's a duo I can see working. Oh, it's great. I could live with those guys. That's a duo I can see like working. Oh, it's great. Like if I could live with those guys, that's like almost about it.

I mean, I live by myself. They have a fantastic system. Yeah. Because they know that they don't have to entertain each other. That's the key. Oh, yeah. Like I'll go over there on a Saturday, get there at like 1 o'clock. We might say six words to each other all day.

We're just kind of like we all know what we want to watch. But if you don't have that understanding and that agreement, and there's some sort of expectation of like, hey, man, where are you at? Can I come? Do people still do that? Did you invite me? I feel like there's – I guess we're older though.

I don't feel like people that are older do that to each other. No, well, you – Do what? People that are older can't afford their own places though. No, like, yeah, but like ask. I mean, I guess, yeah, because you're living by yourself at this point. But I don't feel like – when you're asking if you're a roommate, like can I come? Can I go do this?

That happens in like college, not post, right? I think when you're young and you're still doing the roommate thing and you're living with a bunch of people and you're still – people are still planning a lot of social shit. It's a lot more – I can't imagine living with somebody from here you know judgy and shit like that and especially some if you lived with somebody from here that you have to work closely with every day somebody joked about me moving in with feidelberg after i kill each other getting divorced and erica it was funny someone said it within earshot of erica and she went oh there's an apartment we'll pay for contact i was was like, how much? Where could I be in fights?

Are we talking like a penthouse somewhere? What exactly? How much is the budget here for that content? Because I do have a number, babe. Alex and Sophia live together. Can you imagine what goes on in that apartment? That must be exhausting. I can imagine a couple things.

Yeah. I've seen some videos before. They're so high energy. When, if ever, do they just wind down They must Do they have a time where they're just sitting on the couch Not saying anything I don't know

The vlogs would say no You could say that about everybody in content But not everybody has a camera in their house all the time Yeah that's true Alex Alex was vlogging while Sophia was in the shower getting ready for an event.

Yeah. Good for them. But I would go insane. Sometimes I've thought about, like, just, why don't, let's just do reality TV. Like, we're doing it, like, 85% of the way.

Why not just have me have the cameras around all the fucking time? If I didn't have kids, I would do that. You'd go nuts. But I think I would do it. I think it would be like let's make a show like a full-blown Truman show with me. Like you guys want to do this? Let's fucking do this.

But I want like a shit ton of money for it. Right. Because, I mean, my life is like ruined by all the exposure anyway. So I might as well like really cash in on it. I don't think it's ruined. It's just got a little boo-boo right now. No, I'm not even talking about that. I mean, just in general, privacy is ruined.

Sure, but I think that we basically put everything out there that you would want out there anyway. But the next factor is the stuff you don't want out there. That's what you get the money for. It's like, stool scenes is supposed to be like, obviously our version of reality TV, but just even like taking like the Super Bowl house into consideration,

like next year, it's like in Miami, if you had 24 hour cameras going on everybody in Miami, people would tune into that way more. Think about like the Bachelor and Bachelorette, the episodes people are always talking about are the ones where you're like, something happens, bad, right?

Like drama, you're crying, you're fighting. Those are the moments that if we had and we had control of our own social accounts, like we would be like, I'm not putting that out there.

That's what's gonna make a shit ton of people tune in and that's what's worth all the money. Like you know there's a live stream constantly going. You can see whatever. That changes.

I thought we used to talk about Hank doing a Bachelorette or a Bachelor, Martyy mush and i was like well i'll fucking do this but then like the last thing and i and i really mean this because i see people who like their dms leak or their text leak and they always looks bad out of context yeah always like your game to a girl it's always a little bit shameless it's always a little bit like you say whatever you gotta say. And the way someone would shoot that and edit that and put that out, you always look like a creep.

Like, leaning in for a kiss on a girl is always gonna look creepy if you do it with this, you know? And so, like, those are the most intimate moments where you would look the absolute worst. If we ever did, like, a Barstool reality show

where we were in a house, I would just stay in my room. Yeah, right. But there would be a camera in there too or whatever watch me jerk off I don't care would you rather a video of you jerking off or a video of you having sex cut out that has to be the easiest answer of all time

no I think it's sex I'm awesome at jerking off yeah I'm awesome at jerking off I've been doing it forever is it just sex or the whole hookup that leads up to sex? The whole thing. Alright, then yeah. Like... Because you're good.

You'll make up for it with other things. Correct. But all of it... Okay, think about this, Jared. Stink at sex, but I'll... What are you talking about? Going down on a girl? Yeah. Fingering her? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll walk away. If it's like I mean, like, you'll walk away.

Like, if it's, like, a Yelp review, you'll be, like, a 3.2. But here's the thing you're not thinking about. You're thinking about, like, porn that you watch, right? Think about if you had, like, Big Brother. You have, like, a camera up in the corner of the room, right? Yeah. Let's say you're going down on a girl, right? That means you're going to basically be, like, on all fours with your fucking asshole out. That's true.

Like, the porn angle doesn't show you that. So yours with your fucking asshole out. That's true. Like the porn angle doesn't show you that. So your whole hookup might be worse. That's true. Because you're actually going to be in some compromising positions. Plot twist. Ride my face. There you go. No asshole.

That's the best. That would be the best for the guy. Hell yeah. The least exposure. I mean, like you're obviously cognizant of the camera. So I would, there's definitely ways. You got to know your angles. Got to know your angles.

I got jerked off during Cloverfield. All time. I got jerked off during Cloverfield. Cloverfield, question mark. I'm Ron Burgundy. Yeah. There's a picture that I just got tweeted at me that I have no idea where it's from.

It's definitely me, and I'm a little bit alarmed by it. Hmm? I have no clue where that's from. Is's definitely me, and I'm a little bit alarmed by it. Hmm? I have no clue where that's from. Is this someone calling you out for not holding your boobs? Because that's definitely someone helping hold your boobs up. No, that is on the group chat set, and that is one of our producers putting a microphone in my shirt. Oh, is that all it is?

Because it looks a lot more than that. Those are my own hands. Right. And that's Sophia, it appears. And this is Tom Lee. I just don't know where this picture came from. Those are my own hands. Right. And that's Sophia, it appears. And this is Tom Lee. I just don't know where this picture came from. That looks, I mean, you're smiling, you're staring down at your own tits.

Someone's pushing them up. This is on set RIP of the group chat. And I don't know where this, I'm now concerned. Like what else is out there? What, how this got out. Like who took that picture and how did it get out because i remember this like a screenshot from probably behind the scenes like on the vlog or something oh the caller daddy vlog okay that would make sense i was like because that definitely did not go out on cut yeah yeah what is it where is it it's them on the group chat set

filming where is she looking at it on twitter somebody tweeted it at me oh and it's i remember that moment exactly because the girls were like laughing because Tom was having to like run a microphone up my shirt and I was trying to help them out. So Pete just walked by. I'm just going to change subjects really quick. Did you see where he said he doesn't get along with anybody in this office? That's not true. That's what I said.

I said, Pete, we get along just fine. He said, no, I don't get along with anyone in here. Just walk right by me. He said it on the yak.

He said he doesn't get along with one person inside barstool yeah no i believe that i i respect pete overmeyer so fucking much he is such a throwback to the cube life where it's like i am just here for the paycheck man i am just i don't want any friends i don't want any outside work fun every now and then he'll tweet something cheesy like i work for the best group of people and like to the moon. And it's like, you don't believe that, Pete. No, he doesn't. Big Cat getting him the dog for Christmas was just case in point where he was like,

I'm not playing. I'm not here to play your childish games. Yeah. I also think that if you asked him this about one month ago or maybe six months ago, let's say, he would have had a different answer. I think everybody having complaints about this office and whatnot, he's like, fuck everybody. And honestly, I think I'd be the same.

I think this office is great. Me too. I don't know what there would be to complain about. Except the fact that there actually is no internet. Kind of the one thing that we needed to make sure we bring over. But everything else, like my studio is a dream come true to me. Having this place, I'm so fucking furious about the rundown controversy where we just don't do

the rundown on the nice set. That new lounge that they put up with the free TVs and the couches and shit, fire. We had a meeting there yesterday. He planned all this by himself

and people were like, well, I don't like this and I don't like that. I'd be like, fuck all you guys too. I don't even think that's Pete's job. Was he hired to design offices?

I don't think so. The bathroom controversy, like the bathroom situations. When people were now mad that there's stalls and urinals instead of one toilet, that was the problem. I don't pee at work. You don't pee at work? No.

When I was in high school, I never used the bathroom once. Zaz, looking at you like you have 14 heads. Four years? I mean, I don't shit at work but peeing you can hold it for wait how long

are you here for though 3 hours how long what explain how long are you here for but in high school you were there like

8 hours from 10 to like 5 and you hold it in for 7 hours I just don't have to pee during the day I was gonna say are you holding it in

or you just don't have I just don't have to under hydrated I guess you don't drink any water I mean I have don't have to. I'm under hydrated, I guess. You don't drink any water. I mean, I have like a large ice coffee. If I have a large ice coffee, I'm hydrated. If you're not drinking, well, you know that coffee dehydrates you, right? Yeah.

No, I've peed at this office. It's still liquid, though. But in high school, I never used the bathroom. Four years. Four years. You have never once gone in the bathroom. Not there. That is a fucking lie.

It's not. Jared. It's never happened. Jared. Do you drink water the bathroom? Not there. That is a fucking lie. It's not. Jared. It's never happened. Jared. Do you drink water at all? Not in high school. No. I mean, this is the most outlandish lie that has ever been told on Barstool Airwaves.

I never used the bathroom in high school. That's such a stupid lie. Why would I make that up? Like not in a locker room or anything? What's crazy is I actually think you believe it so I don't want to say

you're lying but you are wrong. You went to the bathroom at some point in four years of five days a week nine months a year.

Not when you were playing baseball or anything? I mean that doesn't count. I'm talking like during school hours. I never went to the bathroom. By the way, you go to the bathroom just to get out of class. No, I had asthma. What the fuck does that mean?

I would fake go to the nurse. I'd be like, hey, I have to use my inhaler. But you could go to the bathroom once a class. You know what I mean? You could always get out of class and go to the bathroom. Yeah, but I could always say I need to use my inhaler. Yeah, but if you have to use your inhaler every day. Do you want to deny me my right to breathe?

Well, no, but it's a lot more common for someone to have to go pee. If I say I have to go to the bathroom, then they can say no, not during this class. Hey, I need to use my inhaler. No? Oh, I'll just fucking suffocate to death at my desk. When I was in eighth grade, there was this kid in earth science. It actually wasn't my class. It was a different earth science class.

He was a little special needs kind of, but not like enough to he was in the regular people class and he raised his hand he was like i need to go to the bathroom and the teacher denied him and he was like i got to the bathroom he's like no like come on you can wait and the kid just peed his pants eighth grade you can't do that could you imagine if that happened now you'd be like fired you'd probably be like arrested get arrested for peeing your pants no no the teacher oh uh uh yeah basic human rights yeah yeah i threw up in a trash can because i was so sick i you'd probably be like arrested. Get arrested for peeing your pants? No, no, the teacher. Oh, uh, uh, uh. Yeah. Basic human rights.

Yeah. I threw up in a trash can because I was so sick. I had the flu and she would not let me go. She was like, this is what you get. You can't go to the bathroom.

I was like, I don't think you understand. I am going to throw up and she was like, you can't go. So I just walked right up to her trash can at her desk and peeped in it.

I was so, I think I was in like maybe ninth grade, like 10th grade and it was like, I'm serious. Like I, and I ended up having like the flu from hell but I'm like, if I'm telling you I think I was in like maybe ninth grade, like tenth grade and it was like, I'm serious. And I ended up having like the flu from hell but I'm like,

if I'm telling you I'm about to throw up and I look the way I probably did, like how can you not let somebody do that? She's lucky I didn't throw up all over her desk.

I guess let's take some calls. I don't have the computer. Do we have calls? Miss Pat, if you don't know who she is, she's this comedian who has one of the craziest, most intriguing,

entertaining, and horrible, heartbreaking backgrounds ever. She was a very poor young girl. She was pregnant at the age of like 14. She was selling crack at the age of 15. She was selling crack so young that she had to pay crackheads to drive in the car with her because she only had her permit. She needed a license.

And if she got pulled over, it would have been they would have had more cause to find the crack. So she had to pay. She used to just break off the crackheads. Here's a couple of rocks. Just come ride with me while I sling the rest of my crack. And I actually shot twice and hit by a dump truck. She got her nipple shot off. She got hit by a dump truck.

She I mean, it got a lot. There was some sad. There was like dark details. She got her nipple shot off. She got hit by a dump truck. I mean, it got a lot darker. There was some sad – there was like dark details too. Well, it feels weird that we're laughing while saying it because like it's a sad thing in and of itself. But when you hear her tell it and like her enjoyment she has of like how it made her who she is today, it's – I mean she's a comedian. She tells it very funny. So it's like as I repeat it, it's funny. Did we – I never actually asked her I don't think in the interview. I'd love to get her back in here to ask, like, what was her break?

Like, how did she get out of that? I know she's here now as a comedian. Well, she went to jail. Right. She went to jail, and then her caseworker – I assume she went to jail for selling crack. I don't remember if that got specified. But then her caseworker was like, every time you come in here, you have me in fucking tears. You should try stand-up comedy.

And then she went. That's crazy, man crazy like she's like she sucked the first time and i think what happened she was like yeah she explained all this to us yeah i just don't remember where she was she was very vulgar she was like she was in like uh like downtown atlanta and she was like that was the way comedians were there was just like vulgar and just like telling like pussy jokes and dick jokes and stuff like that and her caseworker went eventually and was like, you're bombing up there because you're not being you. And that's when she started telling her stories. And that's when she got it.

I would love to meet her thing in your life. Be free forever. What would the one thing be? One thing to be free forever. She looks over at her daughter and her beautician. Oh, we, we,

we, I was going to say, my brother,. Oh, weave. Weave. I was going to say, brother, get out of jail, but fuck him. They're like, no, fuck your brother, bitch, half. I'm sorry. That is the most I'm sorry, brother, but I'm going Can you play The cousin one

Do you have that one When she said that When she said like She was like She was a little timid She was like Weave like hair And then she paused

And says I was going to say My brother get out of jail But I don't take the hair I took off running I didn't know I didn't know what to do I was laughing so hard I just started running.

What's funny is that was the first time we put that question into the answer to the internet rotation. And I never once thought that there would be confusion about free monetary versus free freedom. So twice now we've had people think about like liberating someone or getting someone out of jail. I'm a bad person. I immediately was like, what can I get for free? I'm like, beer, probably? Here she is thinking, I would really like

to have my brother come home. But she was, you could tell she was a little bit stumped. She couldn't think of something. She looks over at her daughter and her beautician and she was like,

heya! We getting heya, bitch! Yeah, I mean, just the clips itself are so funny. Let's hit a break. When we come back, we'll play more Miss Pat clips. If you want to see the full episode, full edition of Answer the Internet,

go to YouTube, Answer the Internet Challenge. It's Miss Pat, one of the funniest bitches you'll ever meet. When we come back after the break, more CCK here on a Friday. All right, we're back. Looking through. Yeah, if you go to the Barstool Sports Twitter, guys, 930 last night, we can hear Miss Pat say, give her answer. The question is, would you fuck your cousin to win Powerball?

So I ask you, Casey Smith, would you fuck your cousin to win Powerball? No. Did we do this talk already with you? Yes. I think we did. No. I'm big out on incest. Fuck pussy.

Is cousin even incest? Broke bitch over here You're talking about Your first cousin Like your Your dad's Sister's child That's what you're talking about

I'm talking about Powerball Does everybody know? Sure Yeah no I'm out I mean I genuinely think People get over that I don't I really mean that

Like I think I think eventually They'd be like, well. Listen, I'm from. Have you bought enough stuff? And you're like, guys, I mean, look around here. What are we talking about? I'm from the South and the stereotype is already that there's much incest going on down there.

So I'd like to not play into the stereotype. It's incest and you're poor. What? I'm not poor. Not you. That's what the Southern stereotype is. And dumb. Yeah. Then you'll be rich.

I'm a smart person who knew to fuck my cousin to get rich. Yeah, you're not too out of there. Sometimes I think about the hypotheticals that you ask people and I wonder when they leave. Obviously, we just live in it. We just are constantly living in these hypothetical worlds.

Like, the celebrities will play into it, especially comedians, but then I'm sure they get home at night and they're sitting there thinking like, what the fuck

did I just get asked today? Ari Shaffir is out on Tuesday and I knew he was going to be good. If you know Ari Shaffir, you know he lets it fucking fly. But the best answer to the internet is if you ever come on, if you ever have the chance to do it with us, if you take it seriously, it's obviously like dumb, silly shit.

But take it seriously. Put yourself in those shoes and think through the whole process. It becomes so fucking funny. And Ari was diving into these questions like his life fucking depended on it. Really? He was thinking through every angle. And also, if you know Ari, you know it's pretty fucking impossible to rattle him. There was a couple questions where he was like, Jesus fucking Christ.

So if even Ari is walking out of here being like, God damn, that question was tough. Some of the people who come in here just to promote real quick, it's different. We have these comedians. We know them. They know us. Everyone's in here just to like promote real quick. It's different. We had these comedians. We know them. They know us. You know, everyone's out here trying to be funny. If you just have like an actor that's promoting a show and we're like, hey, you want to do this video real quick?

And you knock them out with some of these questions. They probably walk out of here like somewhat scarred being like, wow, people out here really like act like this. Soulja Boy obviously lives on a different planet, but his reactions to some of the questions that you guys are asking, which, by the way, is another thing that I don't like about this office. There's a million things to like.

Some of the bad things, one of them being you don't get to watch Answer the Internet when the celebrities are coming through because we all got to witness it. But the looks that he was giving you guys when he would read some of those questions leads me to believe that even in the different orbit that he lives in,

he went home and was like, who are those white boys that are asking me about this? Miss Pat was the same way. Kind of like, these white boys are crazy. White people are nuts. I said that in the blog yesterday when I blogged Miss Pat. I was like, Miss Pat has seen so much shit in her day. And she was still like, y'all are fucked up.

Yes. That's how I know we're hitting the right spot. That's how we know the questions. We're doing their job. The cousins one. I was looking in the completely wrong place whatsoever. I was going down the KFC radio Twitter. Apparently, it's on the main one.

I found it. You want to hear it? Oh, yeah. This is, would you fuck your cousin to win Powerball? Would you have sex with your cousin to win Powerball? Hell no. Like 500 million. 700 million. Yeah, thank you.

I mean. Oh, the internet. God damn it. Oh, here we go. Have you seen my cousin? They all crack heads. I ain't fucking no crack head. No, no, no, no, no, no. I ain't having no sex with no cousin. I barely have sex with my husband. Hell no. Keep the Powerball numbers. I keep trying like a regular black person. I ain't sleeping with my cousin. They're ugly as hell.

I like how it's not the familial ties. Yeah, they're ugly. What, yeah, if they were good looking? You can keep that on my cousin. Hell no, that's white people shit. Y'all can keep that. I don't care. Black people don't incest. It's a whole different story on that side. Black people don't incest It's a whole different story on this

Black people don't incest I love it I got a better chance of fucking y'all So good He is There's just There's just Black people's

You guys are just so much funnier than us Yeah Black Americans You gotta hand it to them Black Americans So much funnier You gotta hand it to them It's like It's also Things that you can't – like her accent and the way she talks.

It just all comes together, and it makes it so fucking funny. I go to sleep at night, and I'm just being like, well, I strive every day to be as funny as a white person can be. And there's just a glass ceiling for us. We can't get any higher. That's the thing. A lot of the time, they're not trying to be funny. Yes. Oh, yeah. It's all natural humor, sometimes unintentional

humor. And it's just, it's not joke telling. It's not like they're writing punchlines. It's just the way she talks and the way she acts is hilarious. So funny. Ruben, the old security guard at the old building, he would unintentionally say things that would make me laugh all day. And he was just being an asshole. That guy, he was just a dick. But he would would make me laugh all day and he was just being an asshole he was that guy he was just a dick he just would and but he would just make me laugh just completely

by accident you can't why people don't do that no we're not we're not that funny because we like we have life too easy that's what it comes down to uh i i'm texting with hubs right now he just posted a blog of mine for me because our internet sucks and i had to have him write it up and all that shit it's it's like i i know it's probably people who are listening think it's beating a dead drum. It's fucking insane. Beating a dead drum, huh? Beating a dead horse, sorry, whatever.

Beating the same drum. I actually even flinch at that. Yeah, it was on a horse. I'm doing it now. I mean, it's fucking insane. The internet. We couldn't watch a YouTube Twitter video fucking five seconds ago.

The internet just doesn't work. It was the one thing that by the end of the old – well, not the many things, but the main thing that people were like, fuck this place. We have to get out of here. We're an internet company that doesn't have internet. The running joke was that Pete's not fixing it here because he's over at the new one and he's moved on to the new one and then the new one. It's worse here. It's way worse here. It's worse here. It's way worse here. Yeah. It's crazy.

Pete sent an email the other day about office updates or whatever. And everything was substantially done. He said the kitchen is substantially done. The bar is substantially done. The bar area is substantially done. None of those things are usable. Therefore, they are not substantially done. Pete, don't say substantially to me ever again.

Are we blaming Pete for us moving to an office one month too early? Yes. Okay. All right. All right. You know what, John? I'm down. That wasn't even a gut reaction. I thought about it for a second. We didn't have to get out of the third floor. I think we had to get out of the second floor, but that was the big misconception when Dave came in. It was like, well, we had to get out of there. And I was like, uh, we knew that we did of there and I was like, uh. We knew that. No, we didn't. We did not have to. The running joke was that we were going to pay two rents

because that's what we do. Would you rather be at the old office or the new office? The new office, like it is, incomplete versus the old office. I have no problem being here

with some of the bullshit we have to deal with. I have a desk here. I'm happy to just have my own space. Brand new studio. Like. Well, y'all, and y'all's studio was done, too. That's the thing. I guess if we were like,

if there was a construction going on in there, that would be annoying. But I'll take spotty internet and no kitchen and dumb shit like that. I think me and Keith have the worst internet. Pete's talking about how they're testing Wi-Fi zones. That back corner. We're going to have to bring one over to you. like i just can't like i don't take my laptop out

when i get here just can't use it and that's right where you are too that would make sense why you can't ever save your blogs yeah i couldn't save a blog yesterday and it like terrified me because you gotta cut and paste your work oh i did email like right away yeah it is crazy that the internet doesn't work hubs has just had a tough couple of days though so he's just you know he needs the weekend i the the one girl who girl who was also doing numbers on her tweet saying, now that I know you guys get so bent out of shape about pictures at a baseball game, I can't wait to take, like, a fucking photo shoot at the next one. They're the ones bent out of shape.

Yeah. Like, the people making fun of it just were like, well, no, we just said that's a funny video. You're the ones rallying like a fucking bunch of freaks. What's Bent Out of Shade about being like, ah, this is fucking ridiculous. Right. She quote tweeted my blog because it came out on the main tweet or the main Twitter and was like throwing shade that I copied and pasted her tweet into my blog and was like, oh, next time ask me for a collab.

And it's like, you tweeted it and I put it in my blog blog and then she and i went back and forth for a little bit and then finally she like acquiesced and was like oh well you're allowed to take pictures too because you're a hot girl you do you sis and i was like it's the whole point of this it's like you don't have a leg to stand on whenever i'm saying i take ridiculous pictures i take ridiculous photo shoots and i would be totally okay if somebody made fun of it yeah that. That's really what it comes down to. That's what it comes down to. But Hubs, I mean, it's tough. His DMs are tough.

He is so. What are they open for? Like even if you have open DMs, close them right now. Or just don't physically open those ones. He texted me last night after he like read the blog and was like, thank you. Like I've been like worried about this. And I was like, worried about what? These people are going to get mad about something else over the weekend.

And by the way, if you're that girl, you should be thanking Hubs. Dude, this is the best. She's got so many likes, so many follows. People know who she is, and she looks great. These are the best kinds of controversy. I love when this shit happens on the blog, when it's really, like, lightning rod type shit, like controversy, but not, like, harmful in any way.

You know, we're not talking about anything that can be misconstrued as like hateful or detrimental no one's gonna get people are saying it's sexist i mean whatever i mean yeah right there's gonna be some element of people thinking it's like bad or wrong but like at the end of the day it's a totally harmless topic that you're getting you're doing numbers you got legs you can blog multiple times you're doing radio on it that's the shit where it's like yeah and and there was like a whole sector of people last night that were saying i was trying to stand up for him because i'm trying to be a cool girl and i was like well no i'm just a girl that cares about social media and also understands how ridiculous it is like what are we talking about what are you talking about hub and hubs didn't take the video which is the best part of it but it looks like he did i

can understand that the way he posted it make definitely makes it look like he was the one yeah but it's it's just really funny that he didn't. I have a really exciting phone call. Let's go. Keebler. Keebler! What up, babe? How you doing?

What is up, guys? How we doing? Good. You still 5'3"? I'm still 5'5", you son of a bitch. But I'm still doing good. What's going on? Now, Casey, I want to apologize.

I have written your love letter. I just have not sent it. I got fired. All this shit. I had to move. A lot of stuff came up. Well, that's sad. I'm sorry you got fired.

Yeah, but guess what, dude? She's definitely not going to fucking know. I was going to say, your stock is just rocking it up. She doesn't fuck unemployed guys. I hope you added all this in the letter. Yeah, I called my boss a cowardice little bitch and you cannot do that or else you will get fired oh wow this is this is all right we got we got we got cube talk going what what perpetuated that and that had to be one of the most satisfying but then equally terrifying

like oh wait a minute i just fucked myself over moments in your life it's either going to be a really sexy story or it's going to be a very unattractive story one or the other there's no in between no no no no no, it was basically we were arguing about something, and I was like, you know what, dude? I'm not going to argue. And he goes, of course you're not. Under his breath. I looked at him, and I was like, what the fuck did you say to me? And he goes, uh, uh, uh. I was like, no, no, no, no.

I was like, be a man. Say it to my face. Don't be a cowardice little bitch. And that is when I got in trouble. What kind of job do you have? Did you have? I'm in, I'm actually in radio. You are? What? You usually get a promotion for that kind of job do you have? Did you have? I'm actually in radio. You are? What? You usually get a promotion for that kind of shit.

Yeah, I mean, so what, you said it to, like, the station manager? No, I said it to the PD, the program director. What station? It was a station in Savannah. I'm not going to say it on the air, but yeah. That's fair. Yeah. I mean, that's surprising.

You know, I thought you were going to say you were like, you know, if you're like in a very corporate job, you can't say those things. But in radio where you're opinionated and personalities. PDs have big egos sometimes. Yeah. Like, especially in like smaller markets. They're like, oh, I'm the programming director. He was a real pussy.

He had been divorced a couple of times. Not to give you any like edge there, KFC. Like, I know you're not a pussy, but you know, you've've been through some shit, and it's kind of like a real bitch. Keebler, Keebler, shut the fuck up for a second. That was the worst, like, I'm not, you know, this isn't a shot, but, like. It's a shot. Like, you just, you could have just, first of all, you could have just called someone a coward.

Just because you get a divorce doesn't mean you're a little coward. No, no, no, no, but he acted like a coward in his divorce. His wife made him a bitch. Like, one time he told a story, he was like, yeah, I left the toilet seat up and she fell in it and she made me sit in it. And I'm like, bro, what is the fuck wrong with you? She made him sit in the toilet?

That is the most disrespectful thing I have ever heard in my fucking life. If you do that, if you do that. What are you talking about? What is happening? So he, like, goes to the bathroom, and he just intentionally plops his ass into the toilet? Yeah, he literally walked in there, and she's like, sit in it.

And he's like, oh, what? And she goes, sit in it right now. And he goes, oh, okay. And I'm like, why did you do that? And he goes, well, I wanted to know what she felt like. I'm like, what the fuck is your problem? What are you going to

fucking give birth next? Just understand it sucks. How long did he sit in there? Did she have a fucking timer too? Like a timeout clock? That part I don't know. All I know is he sat in the fucking toilet

and I was like, you're a fucking idiot. Holy shit. I honestly, I couldn't work for that guy. I could not work for a guy who did that. That is so unbelievably bitch-whipped.

It's crazy. I don't know what your relationship was like. I imagine it wasn't very good. If that's happening? If you get called. No, no. I'm talking about him and the PD. Yeah, these two.

But I would be like, maybe there's a way. Kevin, you're a funny storyteller. So maybe there's a way you could tell me that where it's funny. But if you just told me that, I'd be like, bro, you didn't have to tell me that. You could have just. There's just no reason for this. I don't think you could make that story funny. I don't think you could make that story funny.

It wasn't funny. It was sad. I felt bad for him. I've had funny stories about me just getting bitched around. You would never sit in a toilet. But if I did, it would be funny. I promise you that. If anything.

If I told you a story about a girl who was like, her pussy was so fire, I sat in a toilet for her. Okay. No, I actually. What would be funny, the spin zone would be funny if you were trying to prove that it's not that bad. And she's like, I fell in the toilet again. And you're like, oh, it's really not that fucking bad. And then you sit down. That's fine.

Put on fucking floaties and say, big fucking deal. Shut the fuck up. That would be fucking funny. OK? That would be funny. And they're like, Pierre Escargot. No. Any other sort of scenario where it was like, I mean, okay.

And you just like slowly plop into the toilet. I'm coming around on this story. This is fucking funny. They're like, deeper. Get in the deep end. Put your ass all in it. Spread them. Sit in there.

Put your legs up. I'm like a duck in the water. Put your legs all the way above your head. Okay, I'm around. I'm here for it. If you are, you have to be. And listen, John, I am coming around on this too because, I mean, I have made a brand off of self-deprecating, embarrassing fucking stories. And certainly in the relationship realm, if I had something this good...

Now, the difference is I don't think I would ever actually do it. I think I would have enough pride to not sit in the toilet. But if something were... I don't think I would. Really? No, you would. Come on. I think I'd probably be like, all right, God damn it.

No, you wouldn't. I think there's a lot. It's a toilet, John. It's a toilet. I was the most whipped you could possibly be until today. I thought I had the most whipped relationship in the world until I heard about this guy that keyboard knows. So I can imagine other stories where I was like,

I'll tell you some shit. I'll tell you how much I just would bend the knee to just avoid fucking drama. I'll tell you how much I went the path of least resistance. But sitting in a toilet is not on the path of least resistance. No, that is not okay. But then again, this is coming from the guy who would only take 60 grand. To wipe somebody's ass.

Yeah. It is – the juxtaposition between male and female relationships is so funny because like this is clearly an abusive relationship. Oh my god. Can you imagine if a guy made a girl do that? It would be horrible. The internet would explode. This is what you do to a dog. This is just like, ah, you fucking pussy.

It's like when you rub your dog's fucking nose in the shit, you know? Imagine if you did that to a girl. It was like, put your head in the toilet. Get in there. Not even James Dean style either. Not even for fun. I want to know what Keebler. Those are too aggressive for me by the way

What? Yeah okay Don't you worry about it Casey Okay never mind I don't want to know You don't want to know I do want to know I know Keebler's not on the line anymore

But I do want to know You still there Keebler? I think he hung up No I want to know when I can expect this love letter Because he hyped it up so much at the old office And was like I'm going to sweep you off your feet. And it's been a month.

I mean, it's at least a month. I can't even. I know he got fired. So that's tough. But the words you got to spit. I mean, that's not even an excuse for not writing a letter. You got fired all the time. That's true.

Yeah, that's a good point. He Keibler. What the fuck? What could a guy say to you that if he was five foot two like Keibler is that you would be like, he keeps getting shorter. So how tall is he? He's 5'2". He said he's 5'5", which is...

So then he's 5'2". He's at least 5'4". I mean, and I'm basically 5'9", so that's tough. Yeah. But I want to see. I don't know. I mean, if he knows that he has a tall tree to climb, literally. He's back.

Oh, he's back. Keebler's back. Keebler. What do you... All right, so have you written... You said you wrote this letter, and it's like signed, sealed, just not delivered. The letter is wrote. It's back. Keebler's back. Keebler. What do you, what do you, all right, so have you written, you said you wrote this letter, and it's like signed, sealed, just not delivered. The letter is wrote.

It's fine. And I'm 5'5", okay? I just want everyone to know that, KT. Are you 5'8"? Hang on. I'll climb like a tree. That was funny when you said that. So that was a good start.

You are 5'5 with shoes on? I am 5'5 without shoes on. That's a fucking lie. You don't call yourself Keebler. If I put cowboy boots on, I'm at least 5'7. That's good. If you put cowboy boots on, then you're a cowboy midget. Nobody wants that.

But cowboy boots do add some sneaky height, though. How about this for a second? They do. I would rather be Zaz height than be like an in-between height. I'd rather just be Zaz. What are you, 4 1⁄2? Yep. I would rather be 4 1⁄2 feet tall than 5'3 like Keyblade. Stand out more. Yeah, it's like that's just like Zod? What are you, four and a half? Yep. I would rather be four and a half feet tall than five foot, like three. Stand out more.

Yeah, it's like, that's just like Zod's thing. You're just like a fucking little short guy, Keebler. Well, no,

no, being short, like I know, like I'm good looking, but I'm not good looking enough to pull the hot shit because I'll go into the bar and be like,

girls are like, oh, you're cute. I remember this one time I was at this bar, I was sitting at the bar stool and this girl came up to my friend and she goes,

oh, your friend's cute and he said my name and I stood up off the bar stool and she goes ah never mind and walked away that's tough that's tough i mean i feel for you but you know but i still want to read the love letter who knows can you at least do you do you have it on you no no i want to read i want to read it no no no no no all right you you take your headphones on and keyboard you can read it to us you have your letter you have it?

No, I don't have it with me. I'll tell you what. Since I have been slacking, I will overnight it, and it will be there, and you can read it on Monday. This fucking thing... Keebler, we're not your college professors. I've done this before. Trust me, man.

It's written, but I just haven't said it. Sorry, my grandma died, and then I got cancer for a minute, and then... I said I had the swine flu one time, okay? My printer... My printer... Giebler's going to send a full fucking letter, a full just blank piece of paper with like, it just prints black.

Oh, it printed wrong, yeah. It just prints in black. I can't get it fixed right now. That's a classic. You ever lie about, like one time I lied about, I needed to print something out and get it signed. And I lied about the printer. Like there was an issue with the printer.

But then when I went to open the attachment in her email, it like couldn't open. So I was like – I printed it. I just left it on my desk. But then when it came time to actually print it, I was like, oh, it's password protected. She was like, well, then how did you print it the first time? And I was like, well, I was lying. That's like when you hit him with like a stuck in traffic and then you finally get on the road.

You're like, oh, fuck, there's really traffic. Son of a bitch. Yeah, right. I'm going to be wickedly hateful. Yeah, now I'm double hateful. All right, so Keebler, you're going to send this letter. Can you at least give me a taste? Oh, I don't want to hear it.

I'm going to take my hand off. No, no, no, not even a taste, but just like what is your – the question I just asked is like when you're 5'1", like you, what could you possibly say to overcome that? What's your overall tactic there? There's a lot in there. There's some love in there. There's some sexy talk in there. There's a lot of shade thrown at Jared.

So it's got all the elements. Those appeal to all of Casey's desires. Yeah, that's three for three. Yeah. Fuck Jared. That could be just the whole letter. It could just say, fuck Jared. That is literally my last sentence, though.

I said, if we can't agree on anything, we can at least agree on one thing. Keibler, are you throwing down in the bedroom? Do girls walk out satisfied with you? I mean, I would say I'm about 50-50. Sometimes it goes too early. Sometimes I perform, but that's why I've been drinking. So, it's Keibler. You're funny, man. It's crazy that you got fired. Maybe you end up here. Who knows? It depends on the love letter. You

what? I argue too much. I'm Italian. People come at me. Oh, you're a midget guinea. Jesus Christ. Of course you're Italian. It keeps getting worse and worse and worse for you. I'm a fucking wop, I know. So you're an Italian in Savannah? Well, actually, I'm from Kansas City. That doesn't make sense either. Italians are in those cities? I don't know where Italians live.

Oh, fuck yeah, my great-grandfather. I thought Italians were like Jews. I'm the head mob leader at Kansas City. Really? Oh, yeah, I've heard of the Kansas City mobs. Okay, all right. Have you ever seen the movie It's a Wonderful Life? Yeah.

Hell yeah. We talked about that yesterday. Every time a bell rings, Angel gets a twink. My great uncle directed that film, Frank Capra. Oh. Yeah, nobody cares. Oh, that could be, I mean. That's my one claim to fame.

I don't know, Casey's intrigued, whatever. Good for you. I mean, I don't know. Do we get to go to, like, movie premieres and stuff? I mean, I haven't seen any of that Hollywood moneywood money so we'll probably i don't give a shit are you are you poor is a pretty big deal yeah are you poor keebler or rich fuck i'm poor shit yeah i figured this love letter be pretty damn good keebler how's your dick i mean it's average six and a half seven on it's average. Six and a half, seven on a good day. Shut up.

Six and a half, seven. Fuck you. I haven't lied to you one time. I'm telling the truth. You did say it was poor. That's fine. Maybe you're telling the truth. Maybe you got a hammer on you.

But don't be the, oh, it's average, seven inches. That's not average. And you know it's not average. That is average. It's skinny and long. Bro, you think that a seven-inch dick is average? Then you're dumb, too. It should be.

It should be. Now you're poor and dumb and a midget. Keebler, you should be taller. Just nod, though. Is 5'1 also average? Jesus. 5'4 is average height for a woman. I am average height for a woman.

I'm 5'5. Keebler, do you have the address to the new office? I do not. That's another thing I was calling for today because I need that. Okay, Zah can give it to you or somebody back there can give it to you. Although,

we have people now just camping out outside of our office like wanting jobs here. Yeah. I'm surprised that doesn't happen before to be honest.

The guy today was a crazy person. It's going to be one of those things that like, again, our old office, it was our office

so it was like, you're moving into frat row, deal with it. Here they're going to be like like it's like people with suits get these losers out of here what the fuck is going on out here

someone stopped me today and he said Francis can I get a picture that's tough yeah Sam just started Sam just went oh shit

he took it of me it was just of me he wasn't in it and I was just like what I was just like alright man by the way I I'm John.

Just so you know. And walked away. He probably will never get over that. He will never. The guy that I saw this morning, Zah said he's been here since 630 a.m. Yeah, I get here at 630. And it's such a fine line between like, all right, you're really dedicated. And like, you're a loser.

He had on the full like white, purple, and blue pardon my take jumpsuit. So out of the corner of my eye when I was walking, I had my sunglasses. I was looking out of my phone. I thought it was Devlin because Devlin rocks that jumpsuit. And then I realized very quickly it wasn't. And he just shoved a petition in my face. It was like, sign this petition. I was like, no, I'm not signing this petition.

I don't know if that's Game of Thrones inspired or what, but the petition is an interesting move. But then he started talking. I think everybody just finally acquiesced to get him to stop talking. Oh, yeah. I just scribble my name. It doesn't mean. He was like, I can't get a callback or a second interview because my resume sucks. So I'm here getting petitions.

Well, the resume is probably more important than that. So I don't know. He goes, yeah. He was like, so Erica and Dave aren't here today. And I was like, I don't think so. And he's like, oh, well, I'll get them the petition. And I'm just thinking like what Dave's going to look at. Oh, damn.

Kevin fights in case he's tied and he must be good. He must be great. I mean, we're talking about him, right? But Spire said that he conned his way into the old office somehow. He was like selling like some sort of coolers. And he like used his boss to get into the office and then his resume stunk. And then he said he quit his job. And so now he's just camped outside.

Remember when – do you think now in this new office that it's easier for someone to sneak in or harder easier i say i think harder why because the old office it was probably if you just if you walk if you walked into this joint and then just said oh i you don't have to have a key card it's easy because you don't have to no no i no. I mean once you're on our floor. Remember how we said people could work there for two weeks. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I think now it's harder because there are desks. Well, you wouldn't have a desk, yeah.

But if you just kept it moving. But you wouldn't know where to go either. That's the thing. Because getting up in here would be easier without the swipes. But once you walk in and you have no idea which way to go or where you should be and you're just wandering, somebody would be like, this guy doesn't know where the fuck he is.

I've got to walk around confident, but... I don't know what the people over there look like, but if you went and sat over there, the people over there know what you look like. Yeah, but you always just keep it moving. You know what I mean? But if you're just walking in circles... You could set up a desk.

If you sat down in the old office, you'd be fine. This one, I think that you'd have to be, like I said, physically on the go more, but I bet you could last a long time here. But just bouncing between the floors, you'd be fine. But somebody would eventually – like we might not know because we don't know what the second floor looks like. If someone upstairs was like, you're not in sales, and they were just like, I'm a new intern for KFC, they wouldn't say shit, and then vice versa.

If someone came down here and I was like, you look weird, and they were like, oh, I work with Kelly in booking or some or some shit actually probably not that because i'd be attached to that if someone was just like oh i'm like i buy the facebook ads for like your content okay cool i guess they would have to be sitting somewhere like if if you don't have a desk just keep yeah at this point you're just walking around i'm going to the bathroom i'm going to the snack room i'm going to the studio but i think eventually i think it would be quicker to realize someone moving around all around rather than someone just sitting there who you... Also, I think if you just like plop yourself in the...

Perfect example. I guess they were here to interview. Were we doing interviews yesterday, Zod? Do you know? It's today, I believe. Okay. Well, yesterday, one of those rooms like in between where the new like lounge area is and like the back, there's just like a room, right?

And I walked by and there was a kid just sitting on a couch and he was just sitting there with his arms folded and we made eye contact. I know exactly what you're talking about. And then I got my computer and I walked back the same way and I made eye contact again and then I left my notes and I walked back and the third time, there was a second kid there.

Someone else joined him and they were sitting on the couch and I was not even considering being like, who are you guys? Oh, I'll never be the one to catch you. But somebody will. Yeah, I think it's easier for somebody to catch you. Is that what they were, those kids? I don't know who it was. It was in that green room.

Yeah. Because I was doing that. It was during the rundown time, right? What green room? You have a green room? Yeah, in the back, right next to the control room. So, yeah, I was walking up and down there twice or three times. The kid was in a gray suit right

Yep Yeah I had no idea who that was I mean if you're in a suit in here Unless you're like Yeah the suit's gonna be You know it's gonna Yeah Like every

Like these kids have been walking by all day I guess interviewing for PMT or whatever And they're wearing suits And it's like That kid should not be here Marty Mush What a fucking idiot that guy is What's up Marty

How you doing Let's hit a break You know what he told me today What That he's an outfit tracker. He keeps track of your clothes? No, not of everybody's. He knows everybody's repeated outfits.

I can see that being like his savant thing. He doesn't know how to spell his own name, but he knows what you wore like two Mondays ago. Because Dana's wearing a Lululemon pullover

and Dana was like, doesn't it look great? There's no logo on here. And Marty goes, yeah, you wore it twice this week. You wore it last week with a different pair of pants. What?

Martin Mush, folks. Let's take a break. When we come back, final segment of the day, final segment of the week before chicks in the office take over. CCK on Power 85.