KFC Radio - CCK Podcast: First and Last (with Nate and Robbie)

Episode Date: May 6, 2019

The last week of radio at HQ2 and the first recording from HQ3. All the classic moments from the office relived and reccped in Nate's blog. Robbie Fox's breakthrough moment. Best and worst pickup lines with Kayce and Feitelberg.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Today's CCK Podcast is brought to you by Postmates. We are in the new office, and it feels like people are worried about the food situation. It is going to be different. There's a Panera, and that's kind of really it. You'd wander into Gross Pin Station and maybe get some gross food there. I ain't doing that.

What I'm going to do, I'm going to have Postmates deliver my meal every single day. Doesn't matter. You know, you're going to come in here. You can get ibuprofen delivered right here. Let's say you're on the breakfast crew and you're drinking and you're hungover by 10 a.m. You can get your ibuprofen delivered. Let's say it's lunchtime and there's nothing for a couple blocks except for gross Penn Station. You can get your lunch Postmates. Everything you need now that we're further west,

where once you start to get to like 7th Avenue, 8th Avenue, you got 9th Avenue, there ain't much just to stumble into. So when you're over here on the west side, we will be using Postmates all the time and we will be using the promo code KFC because you get $100 of free delivery for your first seven days when you sign up at Postmates. Download the free app. When you check out, use the promo code KFC, and it will deduct your delivery charge. You get $100 of credit for your first seven days. It's 24 hours a day, 365 days a year that Postmates will deliver whatever you want within the hour.

Once again, promo code KFC for $100 of free delivery in your first seven days. The CCK Podcast, the first ever this will be the first podcast ever recorded here probably. It's Monday morning. You're listening now. We're already in the new office. The first Barstool production from

HQ3. I don't know. I see. I still stick with... What are we on? 8th Avenue? 7th Avenue? I still stick with it's the milton office hq and now this is new hq like i feel like nobody called milton hq ever right i don't know i think those guys probably did i don't know gas has been putting up things like you know hq 2.0 and i understand that the milton office is the original office i think i think i think to keep it simple it's hq3 just because it's the third spot i know i just but it's like the milton office i don't know i i don't know this is just it feels so weird it's a it's wild it's a wild difference it's it's a

much bigger uh it's much bigger it's got a little bit of a corporate feel that i'm sure a little bit corporate kevin it is it's really not a lot corporate it's corporate if you would if you were to look at the other places we looked at, like the Times Square place, you walk into like a marble fucking lobby, like chandeliers. Oh, that would have been weird. Tons, like elevator, like an elevator bank where you have to go through the turnstiles and shit. Like it would have been full-blown corporate. It's just corporate for where we just came from. Yeah.

But that's how we, like that's called growing and getting bigger. It's okay. It just feels like, like the, the fact that production and everything is on a completely different side of the building is just way more corporate. So we're in my studio here,

the KC radio studio, and it's very far from Dave's office. Very far. I was like, fuck yeah. And then I found out where my desk is, and it's quite literally right outside of Dave's office. So I don't know who was trying to fuck with me. All the bloggers had to be right under his nose. At least they put the logo on his office.

I was under the impression that it was just going to be like we were going to be. It's a frosted glass now, thank God. Yeah, mean all the bloggers have to be in one spot you knew that was gonna happen yeah because how's how's drama gonna pop off without that but even within that one spot you could be further away from dave than i am that's true like you're you might as well be in his office yes you and frankie fucker might as well be in the never-ending quest to just get away from dave the biggest building that barshell ever thought they'd have and you're still right there. I'm on top of them. Yeah. It's like they gave us bunk

beds. It's cute. It's cute. Damn it. Yeah. It'll be interesting. I'm sure there are going to be people who there are

people who didn't like the New York move. I'm sure the people who don't like the New York move within the New York move. You mean like the audience? Yep.

Yeah. I mean, there are going to be people who still want squirrels chewing through the wires and it's just not that way anymore. Oh, you want to talk about people saying that Barstool is sold out the first time that this office gets out on stool scenes? Forget it.

Oh, forget it. But why is the reaction you sold out versus, like, you guys, you done made it? Because people are stupid. Because people are dumb. Because they, I mean, it's just like people don't like change. But the fact is, is like the Milton office, which I obviously was never a part of, was squirrels eating through the wires and the, all the old school stuff that they used to do. And then where we just came from became so barstool because it became so gross. It has trash everywhere and everything.

This doesn't look like, I understand that that will happen in the, in the blogger bay, which I don't know if that's what it's called. I like that, the blogger bay. The blogger bay will definitely be disgusting and gross. Dave's office will be disgusting and gross. But where Jen and Pete and Erica and all that, that will never get gross. No, because they're adults. They'll keep it clean. Right. So it will look like it's sold out.

Guys, if you have any issues with this being big or new or state of the art, just know that we made it big enough that we could separate the adults from the animals so that the regular people who have full functioning lives don't have to deal with people like eating out of the garbage, fighting each other, being in the sink, all that sort of shit. It's just big enough to separate. So,

and there will be a vast difference between one side of the building. I haven't even been to the second floor yet. I don't even know that looks like all nerds and it's all i bet that's even more corporate like that has to look like ridiculous um our floor or our side where we are is gonna look like trash in a matter of months i'm sure people talked about us selling out for the new york one but the first new york office and then the internet never worked and all the other things that it's like that it quickly became oh the barstool charm even though when that first started everyone was freaking out about it so it'll be the same thing it'll be the same thing the difference i think with this even just this the first time i've been here just walking around is that everybody

is separated here yeah like other than the blogger bay but god damn that's probably a good thing for psyche oh for sure like you know how much healthier everyone's gonna be yeah it really is mental health like we are not living normal right now it's crazy to walk in i i mean when you have like some controversy or whatever you walk in and you were just like bam you're on blast and you are on top of each other's throats it is not normal no it's like your worst days are on camera your best days are on camera and everything in between a lot more worse yeah i've been saying this for months like where's the therapist office in here we have enough space oh yeah we need what we need one of those we also need one of those um like massage rooms something just a massage chair we'll have like a mental health room

yeah because we have a bar and i nap pods are Are there really nap pods? No, there should be. Oh, I was like, is there a smush room too? Like that's like, what are we doing here? Like that would be the worst idea of all time. I feel like I've been saying the mental health room where a therapist would be, would be great. She'd end up quitting immediately. I mean, there'd be no way we'd be able to sustain a therapist here. But I do think, I think it's going to be, it's going to be fine.

Everyone that's freaking out, whatever. But gonna be weird because they're gonna be days where you're not gonna see somebody that you see on a normal basis unless you do content with them like i have no choice but to see you every day but people that you stuck with me babe i'm stuck with you you're my work husband slash brother because if i say husband i get in trouble um yeah there's definitely gonna be people who like you probably just fall out of like touch with yeah like people you were friends with or whatever that's just like to be people who you probably just fall out of touch with. Yeah. Like people you were friends with or whatever that's just like, oh, I don't see you. Like how am I going to be able to talk shit to Pete every day?

Yeah, you won't. I won't. Pete has strategically placed himself as far away from the people who bother him. It's wild. He's in the back, back corner of his joint, like far away from anyone who would yell. It's going to be weird like when the internet goes down we can't just yell at pete across the room anymore we can yell you need like a carrier pigeon yeah that's what i asked him i said how am i gonna talk to you slack me what

fuck you pete that's now that's that's corporate barstool right there slack me no how about i bash you over the head how about i just come talk to you i smash your skull yeah it'll be it'll be interesting to see everybody react i mean now that i know where i'm sitting i the seating chart thing has kind of gone out the window but people on monday morning it's going to be a rat race we will see people are going to be some people are going to be happy some people are going to be upset here's my question though about the radio room really quick because the radio room looks like the serious headquarters yep so large and willie and the whole barstool breakfast crew that gets tanked at 9 a.m are they still gonna be able to do that when everybody's looking

at i guess nobody's here but that's the charm of the radio room at old hq was that nobody can see it i mean there's no windows other than to go outside it's cool if you have a guest people come in like they can watch you if you have a guest on the radio and then you have a guest who's in the building. They can watch it. But now that means you also can't be like ripping bottles of red. They will though. I don't think they're going to be changing. How many times have we walked into that studio on Fridays

and we're like one or two bottles of wine and there's like 17, a bottle of vodka. Like who knows what. Gentleman's Friday. But now that everybody can see in that'll be interesting i mean willie's not changing let's be honest he's still gonna be like they don't strike me as the type who uh would be bothered by other people watching no it's more as a matter of fact they'll probably ratchet it up that's true willie will just be

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for $29.99 is 40% off the regular price. So go to 1-800-Flowers.com, enter the code KFC, and get $29.99 for a Dozen Roses on 1-800-Flowers.com. Kevin, you're just ridiculously stupid. Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back.

Welcome, welcome, welcome. Is this Kevin? Welcome back. Oh, yeah, man, how you doing? You good? I know you like that. I know you like that. we're back recording uh what is basically kind of the last one oh no it's wednesday i thought it was thursday i was gonna say the last uh episode of cck everybody will be out of here tomorrow the last episode here at this office so we'll doing radio on friday yeah but it'll be like it's just gonna be us the office will be completely empty by that point it will just be uh one last recording uh

like in a in a fucking box because the all of the people and all the stuff will have been moved over to the new office so it's the end of an era here at barstool. It's kind of weird. Yeah. Are you getting sentimental about it? Yeah. I get really nostalgic about like the last places I've been. Like even when I move, it's like, oh, I really missed that last place. I don't know if I'm going to feel that way about this place. Like I'm getting sentimental because I think it's going to change our day to day. Crazy, like drastically different. But this place is disgusting. I mean, you've also been here a year, right? Yeah.

None of us have been here really long enough to truly be like, wow, goodbye office. I mean, the most, we've been here for three years? Yeah, coming on in two and three quarters. Yeah, so not even three full years? Like, come on. You can't develop much. We were in a relationship, but we didn't take the next step. As far as offices go, this was a six-month relationship. Yeah, this was be fun. You can't develop much. You know, we were in a relationship, but we didn't, you know, we didn't take the next step. As far as offices go, this was a six-month relationship.

Yeah, this was a cheapie. This was, you know, you're basically just hooking up. It's more about, I mean, I haven't seen the new office yet. I know I'm, like, one of the only people that hasn't. But I just am really curious to see how the day-to-day interactions go with everybody. Because from what I understand, it's obviously a lot bigger, which is why we're moving. And people can hide places so you gotta realize how fucking disturbing it is that you have to like you phrase it that way that's what that's what it is that's exactly what it is like we're you i've gone up to like the sixth or seventh floor stairwell in this office to have phone

calls that i don't want anybody else to hear yeah there's nowhere else to go so i'm just like you would rather go into what is a shared stairwell. I actually saw you do that recently. I didn't see how far you went up. Yeah, I mean, but you can't go up just one flight because then everybody can still hear you if they're in the stairwell. So you've got to just trek it all the way up. What are you, the CIA? What kind of conversation is that?

I thought to my mom. I'm like, I prefer no one hear this, but it's not no one can hear this. Well, no. I mean, sometimes when I talk to my agent, I'd rather people that i work with not hear those conversations no definitely i mean somebody the fact that people can't have a business conversation here it's crazy and you also don't know if you're on camera either like you're talking about stuff like who knows somebody might be recording i still think

that there's cameras in the bathroom i still think that that he's been recording us the whole time in case something happens not that it not that like just regular ass going to the bathroom is a thing, but like in the event that someone tries to hide in the bathroom to do something that he wants on camera, he's probably filming you. I don't think so. It's obviously not like a definitive. No,

I definitely think that has like secret cameras. Like the others, the other podcast studio was always like, this is the one place that you can like, well, I don't know. Cause if, if, if it does, he's missed some things. That's a fair point.

Yeah. Early on when we first moved in here, this place was what Barstool, what people think Barstool is. We were in the beginning here. You know, like Thursday nights here used to get fucking rowdy yeah but it was like for like three weeks right it was quick but i'm saying early on it might happen again this no it's just it's the idea something new it's like getting back to college you move back into a new dorm and you're like let loose yeah this new bar is gonna be sick it's gonna actually have like like this was dangerous we would party here and it wasn't

there wasn't even a bar right i mean it was a physical bar it was a wooden yeah a wooden shelf from what i understand this new one will be stocked yeah that's bad and like with kegs and stuff i i think with tags liquor all that stuff well i think now i think that we'll we'll stock it and then when that runs out that'll be that'll be it yeah i don't know i don't think they're gonna regularly stock it maybe when new amsterdam comes along and shit like that but i don't think it's just going to be, you know, like Spider rolling another keg for everybody here. If we do, no, that won't happen. Dave doesn't party like that. Dave won't pay for money.

He won't put up money for things that he doesn't do. He's not a drinker like that. If we were in control, that would be like order of business number one. Make sure the bar is stocked. We just need to get like a wine sponsor. They make sure the wine is stocked. We just need to get a wine sponsor to make sure the wine is stocked. We should have a wine cellar at Barstool. I don't know. One day I came in

a couple weeks ago and every single person had a bottle of vodka sitting at their desk. I was like, who did this? Did Spider walk around at night and just hand out? Navi, right? Who came through? It's probably all the vodka we didn't drink at the Super Bowl house. I mean, I don't know. Was there a lot of that? Because I had a shit ton of vodka that week.

Was there a lot left over? The wine cellar in that house was completely... All the wine was taken out, or I don't even know if there was any in there. There was like 400 or 500 bottles in there. And there's no way we dented that at all. No, yeah, we didn't put it. We didn't dent that at all. I don't know what happened

to it. We'll see. The first week or so. This is dangerous to move in now. Weather's turning. You got things like the Derby and playoffs and all this shit. That's like it's also right. It entices people. Solid outdoor patio.

The penny. Right. That was called. I don't know. I'm sure one in Penn Station or Madison Square Garden. It's just like right off the side. Oh, I know what you're talking about. We did a party there once.

It's nothing to write home. It's not like, whoa, this is the best ever. No, but it's an outdoor. It's also nice that it's... Local is one that has it, and then there's the other one that's like in between. Yeah, I know exactly what you're talking about. You have some outdoor space nearby. And the train is right there. That's so nice.

Jump on that Amtrak real quick. Yeah. It'll set the tone real quick. Like I said, when we moved in here Thursday nights, it was like a bar. It was like you went to a bar. It was the Barstool Bar. And the place was trashed in the morning. People were partying until like 5 a.m.

People were hooking up all over the place. It was... The other the morning. People were partying until like 5 a.m. People were hooking up all over the place. It was... Did you get a podcast studio? Did that... Did that... Now, did Dave like stop that? Or did we like naturally stop that? I think it was just naturally stopped.

There was no moment that was enough to clean it up? But yeah, I think it was just like people kind of were like, okay, well, you know, we just got here. It was... It was just the newness of it. That's why I think it might happen again at the new bar i definitely think well now there's so many people and so many idiots like like even when we first moved in here it was still it was still the crew who like knows that you're constantly being filmed and knows to like you're gonna get put on blast we

have so many people here interns ares are going to be coming through. Young people who are just happy to be here. People who think they're famous because they grabbed a quick 10,000 followers. People who are too stupid to know that you definitely shouldn't hook up with people. It's going to be a fiasco if the weather's nice and the party starts turning up. This new office is going to be quite the scene i think it will be i think there's there's a uh there's a uh an era of uncertainty to yes that i'm excited to find out yeah and i'm actually

i was supposed to not be here on monday i am coming back monday just because you just want to be a part of it i i just want to because... You just want to be a part of it? I don't want to be a part of it. I want to observe. That's basically my life. I don't want to be in the mix, but I'd like to see everything that's going on. To watch the mix. Yeah.

I know that all the podcast studios obviously are going to have cameras in it. Are there cameras everywhere in the new office like here, I'd assume? I don't have to imagine. I don't know. It's a lot bigger it was a focal point for dave when we came in here and i think that's proven to be not as valuable as he thought it would be it probably depends on the cost of it all there probably will be something but i don't think it was like like when we moved in here dave was like we need cameras covering every inch i don't think that

will be the same in this case it's surely over all the bloggers are, there will be the eye in the sky cameras. I also think that the confessional has been more utilized recently. We had those confessionals that just became closets. I think the new stool scenes, Hank, has used the confessionals more. So maybe that will be more where you get the 24-7 type of reality thing is people popping in the confessionals. The thing about the Eye in the Sky is that we didn't utilize it the way Dave expected, but it does lead...

It's like you don't use it for six months, but then something happens where it's really good. Somebody eats out of the trash, and we check the tape, or someone falls, or whatever it may be. There's an argument that breaks out where there was no cameras around. It's like the Nate and Smitty round 17.

Whatever it was. The latest one. Like that one. Eye in the sky. Those are great. When Rhea fell over trying to catch that ball. She broke her ankle and fell on the desk. That was great.

Oh, yeah. When Willie almost killed Zah. Yes. That was good with the basketball. Not a cool case. Sorry. I mean, that was a... I watched that video over and over and over.

Not because I wanted you to die, because it was just really funny. That kind of stuff. That kind of stuff. So it's like, you know, not constant. It's not quantity. It's quality with the eye in the sky. So there's some good moments out there. Taylor, what do you got on your favorite moment in the office?

Well, I tweeted a video of, like, old school grit week. That fight's quoted quote tweeted not too long ago i thought it was the funniest moment like ever in barcelona i was asked what was your favorite barcelona moment at the office if you had to rank it your favorite moment for all three you guys in this current office uh nate actually has a blog coming out that he started as the top 10 moments of the office. He was here. I was here until 11 o'clock last night. He came like top 100.

He left with me. Not with me, but, you know, we left around similar times. We went home together. Yeah, I'll see you guys at home again. That's cute. We left around the same time. So, like, he started it yesterday afternoon for the top 10 of this office and left at, like, 11, 1130 last night. And I don't know what's on it I'm sure

that'll be an interesting read I don't know if it's out yet we could use that let's get the dog in here I'd like to hear some of his because it's hard to remember them so if you can just run and grab Nate dog I'd like to you know he's the one compiling it the first thing that popped in my mind just because again I've only been here for a year and a couple months but the the Yankees day where they

all cannibalized each other that was chaos and it was more like Gaz's reaction which was like low-key under the radar but him just like basically having an orgasm because everyone was screaming at each other pots like that that day was pretty crazy in the new office or in this office i would imagine grudgement day still has to be yeah number one i wasn't here for that i went back and reread like grudgement day. I mean the, the amount that was going on, we were waiting for Dave to come. YP and rigs were ready to throw, throw fucking hands.

It was the whole like wipe. Uh, uh, somebody aired out YP for being late. I think probably Nate was, no, that was rigs. So that's why.

So rigs was like calling out YP for YP came in late. And he was like, like you came into like 11am and, and, and YP was like, that's bullshit. You're snitching on me. And he was like calling out YP for YP came in late. Oh, like you came in at like 11 a.m. And, and, and YP was like, that's bullshit. You're snitching on me.

And he was like, you're a professional snitch with stool scenes. And like tensions got high. So that would, on its own, that would have been like a big deal. That was while Dave was waiting to do his Jay Hammy and also serious. Steve and his mother and father were here.

So like, while it all was going down, 15 year old Steve and his parents were just like hi nice to meet you guys that that's not an individual moment of the office but that is probably i mean the the the craziest day altogether then during the two hours of radio when dave did his grudgeman against jay jay hammy and soul cycle the entire office just shut down we sat in the middle of that those are of... That wasn't even just content. That was because we were all

selling one floor at that time. That was content. That was business. Everyone piled at the bar and was just watching on all six TVs. That's the line of demarcation. When you are involved in a moment where the office puts you

on the big screen and watches, you do not watch. That and when Roan did the Call Her Daddy desk. I still haven't seen that. Oh, people watch. Oh, they rolled out the TV and put it on speakers and everything. I must have not been here for that. I don't remember that.

I remember that saga, but I definitely did not sit down and watch that. Yeah, because they were on the yak. And so Tech Guy Andrew just set us all up. That's a bit much. I don't remember that being like a watershed moment. Well, we thought it was going to be fireworks. Yeah, we thought they were going to react to Roan in a different way than they did. I know he went in on them on that blog, but that, I mean, Grudgeman Day is like a moment in Barstool history.

I mean, I had forgotten about the... So that's probably the number one day that we've had NHQ. I mean, I guess you don't want to spoil it, but that's got to be the number one, right? How many... So he was saying, you know, you started as mean, I guess you don't want to spoil it, but that's gotta be the number one, right? Uh, how many, how many, uh, so he was saying, you know,

you started as a top 10, 12 hours. I thought I was going to rank a top 10. Yeah. And then I made a list of 35 and I was like, this is a pretty solid list. And then me, Trent Riggs,

Robbie Fox, Coley just started like shooting the shit, going down memory lane. I'm at 124 now. Jesus. Are you, are you writing about all these things or are you just like listing them a little caveat to that is i want to include everybody so it's like i don't

want i didn't want to leave anybody off the list so some might not be like the most hot moments but it's like top moment of that person yeah uh i'm writing like a sentence or two about each one i'm also i'm gonna power rank the top 10 and And then just, I have a long, long list of 114 others. And I'm writing a little blurb about each. And I'm going to try to find a video clip, like a tweet, that shows each moment. This is an undertaking.

Yeah, when it was a top 10 list, it was a lot easier to do that than 124. 124 moments? There are so many moments that have happened that you wouldn't even remember like holy shit i can't believe that happened give me an example uh something as simple as i wish i brought my laptop something as simple as like go get it i'll keep talking to ory i i uh the like i i hope you put your flying 69 pretty high up there. That's top 10 for sure. That was a moment.

I mean, that was early on. That was, that was a galvanizing moment. Yeah. Like it was like, yeah, it was so funny.

It was such a team moment. Also was here. The Asa era was so funny. It was just like, yeah, now we have porn. Oh, do you have also just doing her fucking porn shoot downstairs?

Do people realize like she and Buddha Ben just did a naked photo shoot on the second floor, like pressed up against the window. There were people walking into the office, just looking up, just did a naked photo shoot on the second floor, pressed up against the window? There were people walking into the office just looking up, just seeing Asa's tits against the glass. That was when... I mean, she was funny because when she came in, she was very adamant about not... She wanted to do a blogging career. And obviously, we were talking about sex and shit on KC Radio. But she was trying to keep the porn thing kind of separate.

And then as she got comfortable and realized like whatever, she was just like, ah, fuck it. Here's my pussy. I mean, so many just absurd, cringy,

like weird, bizarre moments. Like when the mooch came in and he sang Bohemian Rhapsody in the middle of the office, while the mooch was one of the most popular polarizing people. I forgot the mooch ever came in here. Which now, it didn't quite age as well. I don't think you hear that name and it's like, oh shit anymore. But at the time Oh, the mooch was hot for three weeks.

The mooch was the hottest person on the planet. He still is a pretty cool cat. I like him. But his shelf life has faded. I think he's like a CNN correspondent now. He is still somebody. But the virality of his name The mooch being the mooch was uh i mean when we did an electric chair for like a presidential debate and cat tim sat

there vaping the whole time and then chaps blacked out blacked out and fell asleep in the podcast yeah slept here all night yep he was there chaps had a run there where he was just completely incoherent, drunk every time he came to New York. When the cleaning person just hit Dan's wallet onto the floor and swept up his $100 bills. We had a whole, we had several cleaning issues. There were people who were robbing. Yeah, they stole drugs. Yeah, the funniest, when they stole drugs, it was the perfect crime

because no one could really speak up. It was like, ah, you got me. People just stealing shit right out of drawers. The guy getting caught with trying to sweep Dan's wallet. It was that got pinned on like Brett Merriman. I think that was that became an office manager. Brett Fiasco. That was something.

One of the biggest, maybe the biggest early on, like looking around like this is what the new office is what the new york move is all about it top five moment in the history of this company the basketball game oh yeah oh my god oh yeah wait wait wait which one it's allowed sean loud sean i was also gonna say barstool basketball was that was the worst thing we ever did but like like but but the thing it was kind of it is important important because it exposed a lot. You know what I mean? All of a sudden, it's a little bit tougher to talk shit when you realize that everyone at Barstool is an unathletic fuck.

It was also funny, that one little funny side note from that, not saga, but that game. I think I posted on Instagram a picture of just us in the crowd being the crowd being, like, you know, the basketball game, yada, yada, yada. And I had, like, an ex-girlfriend reach out, like, who's that fucking bitch you're with? Sit with Martini. That's lit. That is very funny. I was like, ah, that's my CEO. The fucking head of this company. This is also on here.

From the basketball, like the team basketball game that we did, not the Sean one, was Francis' famous quote, basketball is my eighth best sport. Yeah,

Francis really furthered his legacy with basketball. The fact that Tex was in charge of the Chippewas. Like like because it was tex it it's you know he's gone now and that kind of faded or whatever if that was me like if i was like you know fuck all you guys talking this shit i'll grab the interns and i'll beat you and i did

i would i would talk about that every single day yeah i would still be rubbing that in everybody's face like yeah me and the fucking new like theiceroy's beat you guys after you ran your mouth that much. They're all very lucky that Tex is just gone now because that can just fade into Bolivian and nobody cares. But that was a tough look for Team Barstool, whoever it was. This one makes me laugh every. It's so mean to talk about Erin Olash when she tried to place the states on the map. She thought Florida was Minnesota.

Thank God that Erin Olash is absolutely drop-dead gorgeous. She's beautiful. She put Massachusetts and Montana. She didn't know where Florida was. Like, Florida, it sticks down at the bottom. It's, you know... It's Florida. It's Florida.

I'll give away one more top 10 moment when Robbie didn't come for, like, 21 days. Like Florida, it sticks down at the bottom. It's Florida. I'll give away one more top 10 moment when Robbie didn't come for like 21 days. That's a thing? That happened. That was the most. I'll say it now. I'm prone to hyperbole and exaggeration. That was the most ridiculous, inappropriate thing we've ever done.

Without a doubt. We grabbed our 18 or 19-year-old. He was 18. No, he was 18. He was 18 in turn turning half part-time turning full-time employee and we told him you are not allowed to masturbate and and give us daily updates we had a fucking logo that we used to put on the screens at the barstool for the rundown every day the after show it's like and it popped up days since bob has come and then he would then the day like he came on he was just like fellas it happens yeah and it popped up days since Bob has come. And then he would, then the day he came on, he was just like, fellas, it happens. And it wasn't he jerked off.

It was a wet dream, right? It just came out. It was a nocturnal emission because eventually his body just had to reject the amount of cum that was in there. And it was like, I remember being, you know, I'm still pretty protective of like people when they start. I told Bob, like, you know, sure, you don't want to go to school and like all these things. And then I remember being like, well, Bob, what are your parents think about all this?

Like, how are we doing with the life choices here? Considering we just basically sexually tortured you. Not basically. How did maybe they did? I'm forgetting. How did like the dead spins

of the world not have a fucking field day? Like, let's check in over at Barstool Sports. The 42-year-old man is telling the 18-year-old kid he can't come. And he's giving him, he's demanding daily updates on his sexual emissions. What brought that up? Was it just a debate about wet dreams? It came from a rundown discussion.

I don't remember. I mean, you know how those things spiral. The next thing you know, Bob's volunteering to see how long know this might have been a kfc radio thing because a lot of these things always spiral from kfc radio i think maybe we were doing like a hypothetical about how long that's doesn't that seem like something we would be doing it does and then and then and then like usually what happens like the same thing with the 612 1824 challenge like dave jumped in once that was big enough that it got outside the KC radio bubble. He hears about it. He dives into it.

I feel like that might've been a discussion about how long we think we can come. And then it got, you know, once it makes it to the big stage. And I guess did we rope in Bob because he's just like, well, we're going to make our intern be a slave. Or was it like, he's, you know, he's young, young, dumb and full of cum like we gotta we gotta see i i have no recollection get bob in here get bob in today we're today is reminisce day we're gonna start this uh we're gonna start this process early you know we'll do it on thursday and friday but i want to get it going already your best and west worst favorite

whatever moments of of this quick little stint here at Barstool New York Headquarters. This whole thing when everybody was cleaning up yesterday and like pulling out old t-shirts, like, oh, I remember this. It really reminded me of the last episode of The Office when they're just sitting around talking about the good times. But that, this is not, there's not enough history here. There's, like I said, it's just so much happened here, man. I mean, we packed it in, but you can't, you know, if this was like 10 years, sure.

But, hey, Bob. That's also, hey, Bob. we're about to relive probably one of your least favorite moments ever. I don't think it's his least favorite. Well, I mean, maybe you fondly remember it, but like doing it could not have been fun. The cum challenge. Oh, yeah, not fun. Well, we were I said that all jokes and exaggeration aside, that's probably the most inappropriate thing we've ever done. Why did we do it? So Caleb came on radio when we just had barstool radio we were on like the mma channel right and he said caleb started it he said like his cousin or someone he knew was a doctor

and said you couldn't go 30 days without coming right he just comes out and dave said i was still an intern at the time dave was like robbie will you'll do anything for a job. He's like, he'll do anything we tell him to. I initially came in and was like, no, I won't do that. That's crazy. And then Dave was like, I'll put you on the rundown every day. And I was like, all right, I'll do it. And we did that. We've said, you got your own logo. We put you on the TV screens, the whole nine, uh, 20 days, 19 days, 19. And people doubted me. I really came in my sleep you truly didn't cheat at all i truly didn't cheat because it got to the point where initially i was like this is dumb but whatever it's it is what it is and then it got to the point where i was like

all right let's see how far i could go let's see how far i could take this i got how far past the mt can you go go with the gas tank? Yeah. And then one day I just woke up and it was, you know, Jesus Christ. It is really crazy to think that like the dead spins of the world never picked that up. Was there any articles written about you?

Because like out of all the things they've nitpicked, if someone was just like, hey, at Barstool, like they sexually tortured their interns. I mean, the way that you just explained that is like, it writes itself. So there were no articles There were no articles written about it, but I wrote a blog

about it after it was all said and done, and someone from the Wall Street Journal reached out to Erica to say how well written the blog was. Erica came up to me, that was the first time Erica came up to me about something I had done content-wise, and she was like, someone from the Wall Street Journal just reached out to me about your last blog.

Said it was super well-written. You got a job directly after that, yeah? Yeah, pretty much legitimately. February 24th was when I went full-time. Yeah, that's not good. He would have got a full-time job anyway. But the vibe of like, hey, if you come and you sexually degrade yourself, they'll give you a job. Speaking of wags, though, I had my first sort of interaction with her.

I saw that. She favorited the tweet that the guy sent at me. I got the trifecta. Tom Lay tweeted me. Body. And then Wags and Samir both liked the tweet. I was like, oh, damn, the dead's been trifecta. How about him knowing that you cried?

No, the other guy's tweet. They were all like trying to get on their guy's back. The fact he knows that you cried after Avengers says a lot more about him than you he's following it wasn't like it was forever up to the to the whole story uh deadspin had like another round of layoffs and uh bob tweeted out reminding people of uh when the deadspin editor-in-chief was that tom lay who was that that was tim marchman tim marchman wentman went around challenging people to a fight. He said, meet me in the UFC octagon. Ted Cruz clowned Deadspin.

Everyone was laughing at him. And anybody who was making fun of Deadspin, Tim Marchman was challenging to a physical fight. Bob tweeted it out, reminded people. Tom Lee swoops in in his defense of Tim Marchman. What are you even doing? He says, the new Avengers movie made you sob uncontrollably. First of all,

anybody who knows Bob Fox knows that that ain't a knock. You're not embarrassed. Not at all. If you had walked out of there being like, oh my god, I can't believe how much you were asking me there. Can we film you right now? And I was like, yes. So to think that that was even going to be an insult is ridiculous.

To try to do that. I'm not even going to be an insult is ridiculous. To try to do that. You know what? I'm not even going to say it's the worst because that's just – No, they are. It's petty, and it's what we do. We do it too. I mean, everybody makes fun of everybody. The fact that Dead's been –

It's toxic masculinity. It is. It's what it is. It's shaming men for crying out loud. It's toxic masculinity, and it a uh failed attempt at bullying to the two things that uh you know the white knights of the internet just absolutely have no tolerance for me like i was gonna be like oh damn i got it and i was like huh what a weird thing to go out there and again to know it to know i know to know i clicked on his thing and he doesn't follow me

and i was like that's hysterical you don't follow me you're keeping up with my profile everything everyone does here to know how they reacted to a movie, trying to, you know, incorrectly and, like, failing to use that as an insult. And then Bob very wisely just replies. No quote tweet, no screenshots, no blog. It wasn't for other people to see. It was for him to see.

So Tom said the new Avengers movie made you sob uncontrollably, and Bob said, and a comedy movie made you sob uncontrollably. And Bob said, and a comedy blog makes you and your buddies do the same on a daily basis. 50 retweets, 2,400 likes. It's true.

Bodyed. Toe tag. Zip it up. Do you think that they sit around and think that their clap backs are good? Oh yeah, definitely. So you think when he tweeted that at you,

he was like, damn, my body is... Well, Samir and Laura Wags liked it within two seconds of it going up, so I think they probably workshopped it. They probably were sitting there together. Sitting in their desk in the office being like, what should we say to Bob?

You know how you have the tweet deck? I feel like they have a big screen somewhere in their office that's just a constant ticker of what's going on here. Keeping up with all things Barstool. It's like all of our tweets come up, all of our content for that day.

We're listening to this show right now. How about that guy challenged Keith to the Octagon and Keith's like, alright. Another guy. Robert Silverman or whatever his name is. What's going on? He was also screenshotting our tweets and putting his little comments. He called me a gibbering

moron. And he called Keith a bench. Yeah, and I was just like, yo, quote tweeting. Let's talk about it. Like afraid to curse? I believe so. And then the girl that called. bring more on and he called Keith a bench yeah and I was just like yo quote we I in like let's talk about like afraid to curse yeah I believe so well and then the girl that Erica texted me she said what is a bench I was like your guess is as good as mine but I think it's a I love when Erica like does it like she's like I you know she'll ask me like slang like that like I got to keep up with the terms it's like that's been so lame I don't even know nobody thought he was being like edgy not cursing like you're a bitch and then keith is like all right let's fight i would love to see keith fight so he's

got a lot of rage and then the the girl who called pat a traitorous queer fired fired back a response to her or to him and it was the worst response ever it was like i i i wasn't gonna jump into it because i hadn't had any interaction with deadspin by myself but when i saw what she said back to pat it was like are you fucking kidding me like did you see that Kevin yeah where she was like oh you're still worried about a paragraph that I wrote five months ago and it's like what are we talking that's what I said back to her I was like so he's supposed to forget that but you guys talk about what Dave has said years ago every single day what did she say back to that she didn't respond to me of course i said

imagine tweeting this unironically like i kept waiting for her to say something back to me because it was like are you kidding me like you're you called him a traitor as queer especially that that to me is like she she's gay right yes and so like yeah so that i mean that's just so shitty that's so shitty to be like to like pat is like the the pioneer of that here and no matter what you think of him, to call him a traitor, that to me is actually really trashy. The rest of the Deadspin shit is usually just petty blog wars.

What she did is actually fucking mean and cruel. And the next level, there's someone trying to help. Yeah, who has done nothing but good for their cause. And she said, you're still thinking about a paragraph I wrote five months ago.

LOL, I hope someone new starts paying attention to you soon. With a heart. Trash. Trash. I had to jump right in that. I was like, fuck you. And that is okay. Like, you can be a mean person on the internet.

We all do it here. We talk shit. You get petty. You start feuds. You stir the pot. We are certainly not above that. But we also don't act like we're above it the way that deadspin does so don't tell me that like you are

are uh you know holier than thou and better than when you engage in the same lowly mudslinging bullshit that barstool sports just not as good as we do yeah my big thing is everybody's big thing i put it like we're a comedy blog like legit we come in every day and we're like let's try to make people laugh today we're not like let's try to make people laugh today. We're not like, let's try to ruin things. Barstool ruined everything. Barstool did ruin everything. We all sit around and talk about, remember the time I didn't cum for 19 days?

I still cannot believe that they never wrote about that. I know. They might. Yeah, they might. There's no statute of limitations on that one. What's going on, Tom Lay? They're all fighting for their jobs over there, too. They want to get clicks. There's no statute of limitations on that one. What's going on, Tom Lee? That one? I mean, they're all fighting for their jobs over there, too. They know that.

You want to get clicks? Hey, there's one thing that puts asses in the seats. It's stories about 19-year-old boys and how often they call. There you have it. Can we please make sure that's clipped out and then just out of context hit that at some point? Like some point in the new studio, just like have Brynn just like drop that. Like that. I mean, that has to be, it has to be a drop. I want to go out with Bob one night and like wingman for

him and just sabotage him with that story. Oh, I don't think it'd be a sabotage. No, because it got him a full-time job. You think you would go with it? Yeah. And it got him a full-time job at Barstool. She thinks she'd be like, oh, damn. What up, boy? I bet I could go 19 days without coming with you. And she'd be like, oh, damn. Yeah. What up, boy? He'd be like, bet I could go 19 days without coming with you.

And she'd be like, definitely not. I'll prove you wrong. Let's go. Sounds like someone's already used this before. Yeah, about to say, that just kind of like,

yeah, that just kind of. Not confirmed nor denied. There's a lot of confidence behind that statement right there. Let's hit a break. When we come back, we'll open up the phone lines.

833-85-STOOL. If you want to call us up about, I think sometimes the Barstool favorite or most favorite or least favorite moments are very different than the fans perspective. So we're doing a little office reminiscing here as we wrap up things here at Barstool HQ this week. More CCK after the break. I know it might be wrong, but I'm in love with Stacey's mom. Stacey's mom has got it going on.

Stacey's mom has got it going on. Stacey, do you remember when I moved you? All right, fuck that shit. Word, word. Fuck that other shit. You know what I'm saying? We're going to do a little something like this. You know what I'm saying? Keep it on and on and on and on and on. You know what I'm saying? We're going to do a little something like this. You know what I'm saying?

Keep it on and on and on and on and on. You know what I'm saying? Big Nas. Grand Wizard. What is it like? You know what I'm saying? Yo, guys. I'm rapping for listeners. Bloodheads, fly ladies, and prisoners.

Hennessy holders and old school niggas. All right, we're back. You let one slip. I mean, it's a great song, though. We're going down memory lane, Kevin. We're going down memory lane. What do you let slip? Zah usually does not play any N-words when he does intro and outro music,

so one slipped in there. We are doing a little reminiscing. We are going down memory lane. Bob is just so funny the fact yeah i was just joking saying when you stepped out i said i want to be like his wingman one day and kind of like sabotage him with girls being like you ever tell you ever hear the story about when bob didn't come for work and all that and he was like ah i'll like i wear that like a badge of honor i got he's like that'll play into my favor uh so if you want to call up and talk about any of your favorite

moments as a outsider looking in i'm sure perspective is a favor. So if you want to call up and talk about any of your favorite moments as an outsider looking in, I'm sure perspective is a little bit different if you're a stoolie. I feel like a lot of serious people, serious listeners are like newer Barstool fans that are kind of getting their first look, which is weird if you tune in and you're like, oh, I kind of like this show. And then the next day is Grudgement Day. And it's like, what the fuck is going on? You're trying to get clued into this guy and his girlfriend and all this other shit i'm sure my day on the radio was very

confusing for for any new listeners like oh yeah this is this is like a cool group of people i'll listen to them the next day i'm fucking crying so it's i mean i i think at what point at some point where we got to be viewed it's just one of the greatest reality tv shows on earth it's the day that i ran into barcelool Radio and screamed at Liz. That was a good one. What was that about? Because I was told that she was talking shit. I wasn't listening to the radio, but I was told I was getting text messages and I just literally stormed into Barstool Radio. That was insane. And just started screaming at her. And she was like, what are you talking about? I was like, I know you're talking shit. She was like,

I literally didn't say anything. So then i had to like go back and be like well i was given false information i apologize i mean i came in flying chardonnay at the yankee stadium game it was like ticket shaming like you're not a real fan if you're given better seats than the ones that you pay it was a whole big mess like so when it was basically this was just like you know people in the bleachers are loud and people in the expensive seats are quiet. And then Casey was like, what the fuck are you saying? No, so she shamed, because me, Jared, and Hubs got tickets from StubHub. And she shamed it on the rundown, but it was, whatever.

Beside the point, I looked like a complete asshole because I was mad at the fact that it happened. It's like, well, it's from a sponsor. We got tickets from one of the people that advertise with us but i was told because that happens around this place like hey just so you know liz is on national radio right now just chirping you well it turns out she wasn't but i didn't fact check so i ran in here and that was actually one of those moments where like dave was even shocked like he was like why are you screaming at liz right now it's like because she's talking shit. She wasn't. That was a bad day for me. That's Steve's dream. That's Steve's dream.

Liz yelling at Frankie for mansplaining rundown. That was the Yankees day. That's my cover picture on Twitter. The Yankee fans started eating themselves from within. Oh, yeah. When Liz had made her 27 rings rant, and the other Yankee fans in the office didn't like that, and then everyone was on the rundown.

Frankie was breaking down why he doesn't like the 27 rings argument, which is, you know, you do have to explain your point of view. And Liz dropped the, are you mansplaining it to me? And it was like, oh, shit. Frankie was like, I've never seen someone freeze up more because he knew that, like, that sucks because the mansplain card, you drop that and it's like a Trump card. You can't like you can't.

I have my mansplaining take is, by the way, mansplaining doesn't exist. And I know it's like you can easily flip it on and be like, well, you're mansplaining about people who do that are just assholes. They're an asshole to everybody. That's a fucking dickhead. But I also think I don't I don't think it's like you need to explain your opinion and you are a man. I don't. I know. I know. I know. If you are talking down to someone, that's just being a condescending asshole.

Right. If you are a male who needs to clarify your take and it is in disagreement with a female, you can always play the mansplaining card. Well, there's a huge difference between explaining something and explaining it with the connotation of, like, it's always sports with me. It's like, like because i'm a girl you're explaining it in a different way that is mansplaining no i don't know i think yeah when they call you like honey and stuff yes it is i'm not saying anybody who's explaining that's why mansplaining is not real because it's like if me if me and you disagree on a sports topic oh i'm gonna speak to you in like a condescending

manner being like well i think i'm right and i think you're wrong and i'm a male and you're a female right and then it's just going to be called mansplaining no i think that that girl's an idiot because she's wrong i think you could be a guy you could be a girl you could be a fucking dog if you have to take you're wrong that's the difference is when you like if we argued about sports and you were condescending to me i wouldn't say you were mansplaining because you're not being condescending because i'm a girl yeah there there's a difference, oh, honey, you don't know. The girls who are going to play. The thing is, if you're going to play the mansplaining card,

you are, no real person plays the mansplaining card. I have only done it to Tommy just because I. I think it rarely happens from the person who's, quote, unquote, getting mansplained to. Someone else swooping in. Someone comes in and tells you he's mansplaining to you. It's like, well, I didn't think that, but okay like it's like um like uh i think there was one i saw on reddit one time where it was like jk rowling tweeted something and someone else replied like

that's not actually how it is and they're like she literally wrote the book don't mansplain her and it's like first of all jk rowling is vulnerable to those kind of things where it's like what are you talking about the sorting as gay? She wrote the book. Just because she wrote the book doesn't mean she explained in any fashion how that would possibly make the thing gay. But people would come like, stop mansplaining to J.K. Rowling how Harry Potter is. It's like, it's not mansplaining.

That person's stupid because they're arguing with someone who wrote the book about what they actually meant or they're just fucking stupid. I think that you're going to disagree and if you need to clarify your point and it's a male versus a female you can just play that card

anytime. The only time I've ever played that card is like I said just with Tommy just because I know it bothers him like Tommy's never mansplained anything to me but it's easy to say that whenever he and I get into a sports argument because then he like cowers down and doesn't know what to do. Best of is also brought to you by Omax Cryo Freeze. We are living in the future when I am promoting Cryo Freeze.

That's so sick. Yeah. It's inspired by cryotherapy, which means also sick, cold therapy. Have you ever done it? No. It is awesome. It is. The treatment exposes your body to cold temperatures in order to numb and reduce pain or inflammation.

This is just ice, bro. Yes, I have done cryotherapy. I put ice on my ankle before. No, Kevin. It makes all your blood go to the center of your body, so when you get out, it just shoots new blood into your limbs. Oh, okay. Oh, yeah.

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omaxhealth.com and enter the promo code kfc uh 833 85 stool we're kicking it on a thursday uh fights i have a question for you no this is a guy now i know asking you these questions sometimes like your brain doesn't work normally like a lot of guys brains do could you would you agree with that like you don't you don't do what nor like a normal guy doing something at a bar would not be what you would do yes i don't uh i don't succumb to stereotypes okay but if you were gonna hit on a girl at a bar let's say you're a normal guy how would you go about it i would say hello just hello yeah but hey what's up? Okay. Hi, can I buy you a drink?

Hi, I'm John. Something along those lines. Okay. I wouldn't be using pickup lines or any gotcha tactics. You've never used a pickup line before? No. Really? I think that's a vast majority of people have never used a genuine, like, those pants look great. They look better on my floor.

Is there a mirror in your pocket? I can see myself in your pants myself in your hair when you fell from heaven yeah i don't think maybe like in elementary school or something like that and in a joking fashion but i don't think i don't think a lot of men are going around to regular bars employing hacky pickup lines no the problem is is that the few that do are the ones that stick out like the ones that actually do employ the cheesy stereotypes and the cheesy pickup lines like girls talk about that forever so then it's just like oh guys do this all the time um the drake curse it's like the drake curse is well the drake curse is proven to be true i mean we're gonna we're not gonna go back to that but um so i first of all if i was a guy i feel like i would as much as i make fun of marty mush i feel like i would probably be something like him where it's like I just don't feel like going up in this friend group of girls.

I don't feel like dealing with it. But the other night I was at a bar to watch the Bruins and the Celtics game. And I was with a guy. I was not with girls. So I feel like that's usually even more of a time you don't come up to people. I don't know. But this very drunk guy comes up, and he's like, oh, my God, like barstool, whatever. And then he proceeds to, like, grab my hips as if he's, like, joking, you know, like, when you, like, guys, like, squeeze it from. And he leans over. I don't know that. You know what I'm, like, I'm trying, I don't know how to explain it. It's just, like, if you're, like, standing in front of somebody that you know really well, and, like, it's, like, a tickle thing. You know what I'm talking about? That's different how to explain it. It's just like, if you're standing in front of somebody

that you know really well, and it's like a tickle thing. You know what I'm talking about? Okay, that's different. Yeah, that's what I mean. Like the tickle on the sides thing. Yeah, yeah. That's what he did. I'm sitting in a barstool, and I thought that was like,

don't touch me, but I'm also just like, whatever. This guy's drunk, he's going to move on. And he leans down in my ear and says something along the lines of, if you want to find me later, Viva La Bathroom. And walked away. Do you think he was offering you penis or cocaine? Good question. You know what?

I hadn't even thought about the drugs aspect of it. I just immediately was like, I think this guy just asked me to have a quickie in the bar and used barstool lingo to do it. And it was one of those things where it was like, obviously, I knew how drunk he was. And obviously, he probably has very small recollection of what happened. But I was like, it was kind of clever. It was awful and douchebaggy. Oh, come on. No, no, no. I would never have done it was kind of clever. It was awful and douchebaggy. Oh, come on. No, no, no. I would never have done it.

Have higher standards. I made fun of it forever. But at least it was like he thought it was funny enough. And I just remember looking at him and looking at the person I was with and being like, that can't have just happened. And the guy just never reappeared again. Never reappeared. Yeah, he was sitting in the stall waiting for you. He was just sitting in the bathroom all night,

just hoping I would show up. Well, you gave someone a fucking meat point. You got to be there if they decide to come. How pissed would that guy be if he saw you walk out of the men's room and was like, son of a bitch, the 10 minutes I came out to get a drink. I mean, but my question is like, one, what possesses guys to do stuff like that,

other than alcohol obviously plays a factor, and two, has any girl ever said yes to that? In the history of asking girls out at bars, or anybody out at bars, has anybody said yes to that? I think more than you would think. I have a buddy who is, I think everyone kind of has one of these friends where it's just like, you know, the ones

who have, it's not even really no shame, but I guess handle rejection really well. Like they don't care when they're rejected. They just cast a wide net because they don't care. Right. And they'll always just tell you it's a numbers game. If you shoot 50 shots, one of them will most likely go in. So if they're, obviously

this was a very specific pickup line, I guess we'll use it. So he was not doing that to every girl in the bar. He might be. And maybe this guy only had eyes for you. I don't know. But guys. Probably not.

Guys who are going up to girls and grabbing their hips typically are looking for any port in the storm. I would guarantee that he had some sort of pickup line for every girl in that bar. I was not special. I just happened to be special because he's a Barstool fan. That was probably a nice one to use. But, yeah, I think it happens pretty regularly, and I think it would help.

I think it would work. I think these guys, if you're talking as a career total batting average, I think it's pretty low. But if you're going nightly i bet they hit hit a lot with cheesy pickup lines yeah i bet the oh like i bet they're i bet they're shooting one for 50 but they go one for 50 every time they go out give us a call if you've actually had a pickup line work in a bar 833-85 so and i'm not talking about hey can i buy you a drink because i think i think that works a lot i do i'm'm talking about you really risk it all for what you're about to say.

It's kind of like the honking when you're running down the street and guys honk and holler out whatever. That's never worked in the history of that. No. Like catcalling. Has catcalling ever worked for anybody? Again, that's not something I'm familiar with. You're not a catcaller? I'm not a catcaller.

Have you ever cat called? Fuck no. Yeah, cat calling is like. Best case scenario. Best case scenario with a cat call is my worst case scenario, which is like they start paying attention to you. I'm like, oh, I was really backfired. I really didn't want her to talk to me. Fuck.

I just start panicking. Probably piss my pants. See, I think that the best case scenario with catcalling is they just ignore you because again I don't believe that catcalling has a choice if someone's genuinely giving out catcalls I mean they want someone to acknowledge

like oh you like my ass if someone did that I'd fucking die I'd just fucking Thanos snap away from this planet my inner organs If someone did that, I'd fucking die. I'd just fucking... Thanos snap away from this planet. My inner organs would cease function. I'd be like, oh my god.

I'd panic. I'd have a heart attack. Because you just don't want the attention. Yeah, I'd rather... I operate in the shadows, Casey. That's why I said earlier to start this... It's the nefarious thing to say, but it's the way it works. To start this conversation. I said,

I know you're not a normal guy and like, you're not going to give a normal guy answer here. Uh, but yeah, I mean, you, you don't want the attention. What if somebody cat called you?

What would you do? Like run away as fast as you can. Yeah. What if it was a hot woman? Run away faster. You're just a girl. Like, I think guys always dream of that where a girl comes up to you and

it's just like you want to go fuck and maybe i would but largely inside i would be thinking oh my fucking god this woman is so incredibly intimidating there's no way i can do anything with her yeah there's just no way that it's gonna work out well we've got the calls are coming in about pickup lines the first two are from tex, which means I'm either going to really love these calls or really hate these calls. One or the other. Let's start with Tom from Texas. What do you got on pickup lines? What's up, Casey? How are you? Pretty good. How are you? I'm fantastic. So my favorite pickup line to use, you know, you go up to a girl and you say hi first, but the next words out of your mouth are, want to make out. And I'll tell you why.

Either one, the girl makes out with you, and that's a win. Two, she laughs. And Marilyn Monroe once said, if you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything. Or three, she doesn't like it, and she blows you off. And honestly, do you want to hang out with a girl that doesn't have a sense of humor anyway? I don't think so. So is this, whenever you do this, is it like right away when you meet her, or have you talked to her and interacted a little bit before you do it?

I typically interact a little bit. I'll at least say, hey, I'm Tom. You know, how are you? You know, give a nice little smile, bat my eyes a little bit, and then I go in for the kill. That Texas charm. Fights. That's what we call Texas

charm. Now, if I thought somebody... You want to fucking have a thumb war with our tongues? That's Texas charm? No, no, no. The way he just said, you smile a little bit, you bat your eyes. If somebody came up to me... Oh, God. Thank God Texas invented that. I'm just saying, Texas, the first phone call we took was a good

call from Texas. Texas invented smiling. Put that on the board. Texans smile more than people in the rest of the country, I'd say. That's actually probably not true. Shut the fuck up. Next call. The next call is Phil from Texas. Let's see what he has to say. Phil, what's up?

Hey, guys. How y'all doing? This guy's actually from Texas. What's up, Phil? Casey, I've called him before but uh i've got a line that i've used probably since college that's worked probably four out of ten times i try it uh kind of similar to tom though you can't just go up there and just drop it on him that's just kind of creepy and weird just you don't want to do that but uh kind of the same thing go up talk to him for a few minutes and i usually ask him you, I'd say I'd love to buy you a drink,

but I'll be honest, I'd be really jealous of the straw. God. That can't work. That can't work. He did say four out of ten that he's tried. That's a high. That's Hall of Fame numbers. That's a high batting average.

400 is Hall of Fame numbers. 40% from the field. I think that high Hall of Fame numbers. That's a high batting average. 400 is Hall of Fame numbers. 40% from the field. I think that's Hall of Fame numbers too. That's crazy. There's no way you're shooting Hall of Fame numbers with I wish you'd suck my dick like a straw. I don't think that that's what he's saying. I think that's essentially what he's saying. Yeah, that's what's being said.

But at the same time, there's no way that would work on me, to be honest. But I also think if there's no way that would work on me to be honest but i also think if there's a rapport of like it's funny that's the thing if you come flying out of the woodwork with that it's never gonna work but if he's like talked to these girls and like he's established that he has a sense of humor and or she does i can see a girl maybe being like okay that was funny i just being jealous of a straw is tough i can't find that funny i don't think it's funny either but i don't think girls do because i think i think it's just

something they and you can answer this better than i can obviously i just feel like it's something you're inundated with so much your whole life that you just become sick of all of it like not even a particular line just all of those lines lines with like the sexual twist to them. I'd be like, all right, shut the fuck up. Yeah. Yeah. It also depends on like what you're going out for. It's like we talked to Marty about this yesterday.

It's like you can go to a bar and have zero intention of wanting to be picked up and or going home with somebody. There's also the there's the chance that you're going out just for that. So if a guy hits you with a sexual line, when you're going out for that, you're going to have a better chance of it working. Obviously. It's an obvious statement. I mean, like,

I feel like if you're going to do something like one of those, I just go up and do like, no shoes want to fuck. I mean, the same thing with, with the first caller's name, but the same thing where it's like Tom from Texas. I mean,

that's like, Hey, you want to make out is that's the same thing. I think I, and maybe I read into it to make out? That's the same thing. You're saying the same thing. I think, and maybe I read into it wrong. Maybe I took it the wrong way. I think that he was saying like he makes it a joke when he says it, not like a serious like,

hey, you want to make out? Like it's more of a, if you say, hey, you want to fuck? I think he does make a joke of it. I think that's the vibe I got too. It's easier to take it as a joke when he's like, hey, you want to make out? Because it's like more junior high than, hey, you want to fuck?

Like that's hard to joke with. Yeah, I guess. I mean, you take that more seriously. I want to make out because it's like more junior high than hey you want to fuck like that's hard to to joke with yeah i guess i mean you take that more seriously i want to make out with strangers gross my kissing is disgusting just kissing in general oh so gross even with like your girlfriend yeah well i wasn't talking about pigs i mean i didn't know if you meant just with like random animals no no i did not mean that i meant with like if you meant strangers or like random hookups you don't you don't want to kiss anybody. I mean, look, I'll kiss. I'll do some kissy kissies. But it's just, I don't get the appeal.

Kissy kissies. Please don't ever call it that again. Spoochies, spoochies. Please don't. I can't look at you right now. Let's take a call from. Stop. I can't even get the calls to work. I'm like, please let this call work so I don't have to hear this anymore. Am I on the air? I can't. Let's take a call from... Stop. I can't even get the calls to work.

Like, I'm like, please let this call work so I don't have to hear this anymore. Am I on the air? I can't do it. Oh, hello. Is this Walt from New York? Yeah, it's Uncle John. What's going on? Whoa, what's up, Walt?

How you doing, bud? Hey, it's Walt. Yo, I'm doing well. So, as a known whiskey guy, it's tough to be slinging bullet bourbons in the summer. What's your summer drink? You too, Casey. What are we drinking this summer? Tequila.

Tequila! I mean, I'm a vodka soda girl. That's lame, I know, but that's a good— Nah, man, I love a spicy mark. Gets my fucking pussy wet. I don't know what just happened. I don't know if like your, like your kissy noises, like if all of a sudden flip some Feidelberg switch, but we're here, we're here.

It took you eating a five guys hamburger, getting mad about Taylor Swift. And then I don't know what happened. I got energy now, baby. Everyone watch out. I mean, you talking about kissing actually got you some energy, so maybe your take on kissing is wrong. Got me all boned up. I hate you.

You're the worst. Yeah, I do like kissing. No, I'm a big, I still drink whiskey in the summer, but if I'm out day drinking or whatever, I go like this. But I'm a big mezcal guy. I like a nice spicy mezcal margarita. But do you drink those in the winter? I'll fuck around with it here or there, but I drink those in the winter like I drink whiskey in the summer.

The most basic white girl thing I'm going to say, which I say a lot of things, is rosé during the summer is good. Yeah. What's your favorite brand? I don't have one. I was joking. I know. The, uh... See, I also can drink red wine during the summer.

I have no problem, but I'm not doing it like outside. I'm also, I'm also, I can drink anything anywhere. I don't, I don't have like a summer drink, but I also, you know what I'll fuck around with? A little flick my nips. While you're doing some kissy kissy?

Like a cucumber, like a mint cucumber vodka drink or something like that. Refreshing. Refreshing. Michaladas, have you ever had one of those? No, that sounds gross. Do you like Bloody Marys? Nope. No.

Well, then you will like it. But a michalada. It's disgusting. you would like it. But a michelada... It's disgusting. A michelada is basically, it's a Mexican beer with lime, and then you make it with, like, tomato juice or clamato juice. It's like a very refreshing version of a Bloody Mary,

because it's a lot lighter. It's delicious. I'm gonna make you one. Nah, pass. You're gonna have to drink it. Alright, let's go back to pick-up lines. Lane in Indy. Lane, what's up? Not much. How y'all doing? Pretty good.

Long story short, when I was in the Navy, we were on operation in Israel, and it happened to kind of be when I got inducted by initiation night to our unit. And so we got shit-faced hammered from some vodka we got at a gas station out in the middle of the desert. And, yeah, it was a good time. That's awful. I mean, that's a relative time. Yeah. Gas station vodka.

And so I was forced to get a tattoo. And so we got into the city and I had no choice where it was or what it was, but this was back when Jackass was pretty big. So I ended up having to get the your name tattoo on my ass but the guy couldn't write in english so my drunken self had to write this thing in cursive so it looked like a two-year-old wrote it and so we get back in the country and fleet week is like a week later. And so we're on, we rode up on one of the ships to Fleet Week. And so we're out in a bar.

And my chief is like, finds this group of girls. He's like, hey, Doc, come with me. I'm like, all right. And so he's like, Tony, what's up about your ass? Tell them what you got going on there. So I'm like the guy earlier that said that you don't like stereotypes. I hate it. I don't like approaching people in a bar, especially a woman.

I don't like it at all. bar especially a woman i don't like it at all and so i'm like yeah no yeah i got your name on my ass so she called my bluff and she basically grabbed me and drug me into the corner of a bar and like i had my dress whites on almost tore them apart like trying to get my ass cheek out to look at it saw it couldn't read it so she's like squinting two inches away from my ass cheek and this poorly lit bar trying to read it and then long story short didn't even make it back to the group wound up getting a ride from the nypd officer back to her apartment and did the deed so so your pickup line is getting someone's name tattooed. I just hung up on him by accident, but yeah.

But here's, here's, I. That's a, that's a big one. No, but it. That's good. It's going for it all. Just saying your name. I mean, that's because the jackass thing, it makes sense. First of all, the fact that anybody would agree to, hey, I'll go get a tattoo and I

have no control of what it is or where it is, is crazy to me. I think that's more common than you think. I just can't fathom being in that position. Like, yeah, you, I can, I guess unless you just know your friends wouldn't fuck you over, like, what if they're like, okay, you're gonna have to get it on your forehead. Oh, yeah, I mean, I guess the forehead's a tough one. I feel like tattoo bets are only made

with people you at least trust a little bit. A little bit. But I will say, that guy saying it was Fleet Week, Fleet Week, I've seen Sex in the City. I know how these things work. That girl just wanted to go home with somebody in the neighborhood. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's true. Fleet Week, you go to Fleet Week. I've seen Sex and the City. I know how these things work. That girl just wanted to go home with somebody in the Navy. Yeah, yeah, that's true. Fleet Week, you go to Fleet Week and you wear

a uniform. Yeah, he was wearing his dress whites. I mean, that would not have worked, I feel like, in a different setting. You know what I don't get, by the way? What? I don't like ladies who like a man in a uniform. I don't get it. I get the prestige that comes with their job. Uniforms

are ugly. All uniforms? I think like a cop uniform. Come on, man. That's not... I'd take that shit. I'd show up like, I get that shit tailored. You want me to wear these fucking baggy ass blue khakis? Are you fucking nuts? How am I going to pull with this? I don't think uniforms

look nice. Again, I get the honor that comes with the profession, but I don't think uniforms look nice again I get the honor that comes with the profession but I don't think uniforms are nice well we'll talk about that on the other side we've also got some good calls on pickup lines and fights is apparently like what did you say boned up and smoochy smoochy so our two is cck on the other side 833 85 still give us a call

let's talk your best pickup lines and really whatever the hell you want we'll see you on the other side. I just want Zot to be my forever DJ. racing hard on vacation. No exaggeration. Said you amazing. Moving too fast. Can't pace it. I just want Zot to be my forever DJ. Zot, I say this every show, and I know you have a Spotify playlist, and it's just full of bangers, but I just need you to just everywhere I go

be controlling my music somehow. What's that playlist, Zot? I tweet it out. So it's my pinned tweet. You can find it at at Dumbidget Zimbo on Twitter on twitter every single song i play on radio i try to put it in there and i try i try i try a little i try out a little something for everybody so so there's a lot of dance all in there is some white girl songs like this you know there's some rap you'll find you'll find something for you you've got some spanish music too a lot of african stuff too yeah he's

not leaving anybody out oh I feel like there's never been a time that we come back from commercial break where I'm like, I don't like this song or I'm mad that Zod picked this song. Oh, God. Run dry soon. Yeah, right? Hour two here on CCK. I really have no idea what we talked about in hour one. We talked

about a lot of things. All over the map. All over the map. But Gronk is going to play football again. We know that. And we've got some calls back to the pickup line, so if you're just tuning in, we're talking about bad pickup lines and if they've ever actually worked, because I do not believe that cheesy pickup lines actually work, but apparently they do. Let's go to

Zach in Ohio. Zach, what's up? What's up, guys? Big fans. So something a buddy of mine, a buddy and me used to do in college back at Ohio university. Um, we used to make up, pick up lines that were just terrible. So, um, basically we would take original ones like, um, are you from Tennessee?

Cause you're the only 10 I see and fuck it up and just be like, are you from Tennessee? Because you're hot. And they would just think it's hilarious. I mean, again, this is back in college. So maybe it was like a 30 year old, this doesn't work out at the bars, but back in college, it was just a, it was just a starting point that would kind of like get you in the door. And I don't know, girls would think it was funny when you explain what you were doing and you would come up with other ones. Like you'd purposely mix them up and say like the punchline of another one in response to the first part of a different one.

It just kind of started that conversation. So that's the only way I can see that it actually worked because no one likes an actual pickup line. I can see that working. Yeah, I can see that working because it makes you the butt of the joke whereas i feel like the other way it puts pressure on the girl how to respond or something like that or how she should feel after being approached and all all kinds of strange emotions but that basically opens the door to be like make fun of me i'm i'm the punching bag here you can laugh at my expense rather than like uncomfortably laugh at something i said or whatever like I'm being an idiot

and I am presenting my idiot self to you. Yeah I think there is a fine line because I like that too I think it's funny there is a fine line on if you can tell they're messing it up on purpose versus if they're like they just mess it up. And I think you have to stand on that fine line. You do. I think if you're intentionally doing it it's like alright. Then yeah you're an idiot.

Or if it's just like. You're stupid. If it's like he might really just think this then then that also won't work for you. It's a delicate dance. You have to do with it, but I can see this one being the confidence that you would have to have to know that you don't force it and, or don't sound like the biggest idiot in the room. But I can see it in college working a lot. I could like, I he's right. I don't know if like at my age or, you know, people that are older, if that would work as well, but I guess it's all on the delivery, but I don't hate that one. Let's go to Alexi. What do you got on pickup lines? Howdy guys. So my first, uh, my first line actually requires them to talk first. Um,

so I'm a solid seven and a half, right? So a lot of first lines from girls are, when you come up to them and say, hi, don't go to dance on it. I have a solid seven and a half Right? So a lot of first lines from girls are When you come up to them and say hi to them Go to dance on them Is I have a boyfriend So one time I responded with I have a goldfish And she looked at you What do you mean?

And I said oh I thought we were talking about things that don't matter Boo! That's such a You haven't heard that a million times i've heard that one not not the goldfish one but i've heard variations of it or the the one that usually comes after that is well just because there's a goalie doesn't mean you can't score right that those are the same yeah the same i've heard both of those many times the originality or just being yourself is all that plays i don't like if you fucking say a line that like, you can call on the radio and I'd be like

I've heard that before, it doesn't yeah, it doesn't work. It's like, if I've heard it before I'm sure every single girl in every single bar has heard it before. That's why I was by no means going to fall for the Viva La Bathroom comment ever, like that just wouldn't happen, but

at least it was something I had never heard before and it just flew out of his mouth as if he had been saying it. He might have actually been saying it to everybody in the bar. Who knows? Who knows? I'm going to guess no. I mean, he was that drunk. He might just been like, whatever. I'm going to just try this on everybody. Got Nick in Denver. What do you have on pickup lines? So I was in Vegas a couple of years back, drunk at excess. And I just went to a girl. I said, said hey how do you like your eggs in the morning and she starts laughing chuckling and she goes I don't know how and I just said fertilize and somehow she gave me her number I've heard that too maybe maybe I haven't heard that one I mean maybe it's just

like guys maybe maybe guys have heard more than girls because like we just like I mean when I was in like fifth grade we would just like sit in a circle and say them because we thought it was funny so and obviously i've just learned some and guys are probably less nervous to say to another guy like hey guy hey man i heard a funny pickup line and it'll tell it to me that they'll never use it in real life so maybe i've heard more than the average girl but i just assume that if i've heard something than the girls nobody's used that one on me but as soon as he said how do you like your eggs in the morning i knew where it was going. And if that did happen,

I'd be like, let me save you the time. Don't say fertilized. I like them scrambled. So let's work on that. What? I don't know what to say. What?

I don't know what to say. All right. Brian in Minnesota, please say. Are you, I always thought we were still talking about female eggs. I was talking about actual eggs that I like. I like my scramble. You sick fuck. No. I mean, there was no transition.

You directly went from talking about female eggs to talking about liking your scramble. There was no fucking transition. That's not sick of of me it was me staying on topic and you straying I meant sorry Brian you have to stay on the line while we yell at each other for a second I meant like don't like let's not do the whole sexual aspect you're actually going to like me how I like I can't

look at you you're actually going to ask me how I like my eggs in the morning let's actually have a conversation fairer explanation than the one you just thrown out that I like my fucking uterus scrambled. Brian, what do you got? I don't know if I can follow that one up, but there's a whole YouTube channel. There's this guy, I think he's called Angry Picnic. He's got an entire series.

I mean, he'll go out and serenade girls. He'll make up a song on the spot. He also has weird, you know, cheesy pickup lines like one of my favorite. He walks around and he'll just walk up to girls on college campuses and he's like, can you hold this? Can you hold this? And they're, you know, obviously weirded out and then when they finally put their hand out, he just holds their

hand and starts walking together with them. And he's got, it's an entire YouTube channel called Angry Picnic. Really good. Bunch of cheesy pickup lines and songs. I mean, I, I, mean, is he rolling up with a guitar? I just hung up on him. Oh, you're quick with the hang up. No, I'm not.

So to be completely honest, I like hover over it. And then sometimes it just happens. Okay. I can't get over the fact that you thought I was, whatever. Continue. I can see if you, if you got a guitar, you can just use a guitar as an accessory.

Oh yeah. Just to have it. Yeah. It's like accessories. As far as accessorizing goes, it's like purple heart one guitar too. Uh, if you can't play the guitar,

but you have it with you, that's not going to help. It's going to hurt. It's going to be a hindrance. I don't want to be the asshole who plays guitar. Don't worry about it. You're walking around with one. Yeah, I dated somebody who played

the guitar for a very long time, and I met him when he was playing the guitar. That helped me fall for him. If somebody was just sitting with a guitar, I'm like, oh, you play the guitar, and he was like, yeah, but I don't feel like doing it. I'd be like, okay, so you just have this here? That would be the biggest loser move ever.

You better be able to play the fucking guitar if you've got a guitar i could i could wiggle around uh by inability to play the guitar i think i could talk my way out of that i don't think my only ability is talking uh you so what if i came up to you and you had a guitar and we were just because i wouldn't go up to like a stranger be like oh my god play me a song but if you're trying to like woo me in some sort of way and we're sitting at a picnic and there's a guitar there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, I wasn't talking about that. I was talking about like you just at a party or something like that.

At a party, people would make you play it. Nah, I don't want to be that guy playing guitar at a party. Because there would be some, you just brought it with you? Yeah, yeah. Just thought you needed it? That guy's an asshole. No one likes the guy playing guitar. Why do you have it?

And look, now we're in the middle of a conversation. But then there would be some drunk girl, it's probably like the girl's friend that you're talking to that's just drunk

and has a camera and be like, well no, play her a song then. She wants to hear a song and then you'd just be shit out of luck. Then I would just

make a confession to her and be like, I was just, I'm only going to tell you this but can you keep a secret from me please? I don't actually know how to do it. I was just trying to get attention.

I get vulnerable quick. Right. You go from the cool guy to the vulnerable guy real fast. Next thing you know, tossing sheets. It's like wedding crashers. He's like, lost a lot of good. The Yankees. Yeah.

The trades and unruly fans. That would be you. Kenny from Texas. What you got on pickup lines? Yes, ma'am. So this works mainly in like a group setting. So you got everyone hanging out. The boys are cracking jokes. The girls are laughing.

The guy kind of has to casually throw out that he's got a tiny wiener. And the boys are going to laugh, but the girls are going to question it. Like, oh, is he saying that just because he might have a big wiener? You know what I mean? And he's kind of just, you know, playing down. And then, you know, they're going to want to find out eventually. But joke's on them if you do. But either way, it kind of works.

But you can't go up to someone just sitting there by themselves and say, hey, I got a tiny wiener. That one doesn't work out. I think this is a strong play. Shit. There you go. I thought he was untalking old hover hands um the uh i think it's a strong one i it's my best one i've heard you like that one i think because i i think it's it takes for if you just say you have a little dick i think girls will probably understand that you don't it takes big dick confidence to be like i got a little dick well and like he said either way it's either you do and they still find

out but you still took her home or they do and you don't and i mean it's a win-win in that situation i guess for the guy yeah i mean i just self-deprecating humor always plays yeah i just can't imagine that's that one's never been tried on me before I do I do think in a group of girlfriends it's probably funnier like a single like just girl by herself I would not go up and just straight up talk about like what you're packing that would be bad strong that would be bad um opinion from you but I know a strong move from the guy strong opinion yeah I'm right there I don't i just i don't only took you to a half a quarter of the way through our two nice job fuck off fights okay uh you had some energy and now

you're just being mean i don't know you need to take a nap or something i'm i'm a volatile person yeah i know i just i'm i'm living it up close and personal currently i just don't i honestly don't see how that would actually like work like play play out. Like I understand it could work, but how do you open up with, hey, I have a small dick. Like that would be a hard thing to do. Yeah. Yeah. It's difficult. It takes, you know, how do you jump off a bridge?

You just got to get that confidence. Just got to go. Just got to do it. All right. We've got Jen on the line, a take home line. Jen, what's going on? Yeah. So not really.

This is more what I use for if I've been talking to someone and feel like if I point them in the right direction, they'd come home with me. But my roommate and I invested in an N64 a while back. So if we're talking, I'll just throw in, hey, do you want to go play some Mario Kart? I have it back at my house, do a little Mario party. And I found it a pretty big crowd pleaser. That's actually genius. What did you say, Zaha? Can I pull up?

Yeah, yeah, Zaha. Jen, Zaha's ready to come up with you right now. I come over any time, you guys. That pisses me off because it's so easy for women. It is not. Can you go play Mario Kart? Oh, you mean that? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll go play Mario Kart. Jen, mean that? yeah yeah yeah it's great don't get me wrong it will work it's fantastic it's upsetting how easy it is so was it your idea or did you guys find it somewhere else or was it like an original thought? I don't think it was just like an original thought I think we bought it because we just

like playing Mario Kart and then happened to be out at a bar one night and found a couple guys that that we liked and wanted to bring home with us. And we're just like, Hey, I wonder if they want to play Mario Kart. So that's how we asked them. And it just kind of, it worked and figure it out. If we just keep doing that, it does. It's a good end. Batting a thousand. Thanks for the call, Jen. I agree with you fights. It is easier for girls to make that happen. I would have never thought of an n64 ever like that would have i mean here's the thing too is with most guys i've expressed my uh my fear of this but with most guys if you just hit like a well if you hit me with i want to like you want to get out of here we're we're fucking really

farts in the wind. But if we are... I don't like that. I don't like that at all. If you're like, you want to go fuck my brains out, then I'm like, oh my god, no. Scramble my eggs? Gross. I hate that that's going to... My breakfast is now ruined.

I'm never eating scrambled eggs again. Ever. You have now ruined my breakfast. If you're like, hey, you want to get out of here? We're gone. We're out. So you don't like the aggressiveness. It's not that I don't like it. I'm just scared of it.

The N64 is nice. It's just not necessary. You can be like, I want to get out of here. You want to leave. You can be like, I have water in my house. You want to go get some? I have a house. Would you just like to get to it? Don't even need the house. I got a box. There's a bathroom. Do you need a little bathroom?

Done. By the way, Deke Zucker, shout out to him getting a t-shirt photoshopped up real quick. I guess I'm in the downward dog position, which is an aggressive move by Deke, I must admit. But, I mean, that shirt came flying out the woodwork yoga in the bathroom i'm in a downward dog position i like it on the record

and i'm not touching the bathroom floor with my hands ever do you think you're doing drugs off the bathroom floor do you think you're having sex i wish that that guy i mean the guy was a barstool fan i wish you if he is listening or whatever that he would just call in and explain what he wanted. Cause I, I thought there was one option there that to me, it was like, let's go hook up in the bathroom.

Now you've got me thinking you might've just been offering me some drugs. Not that I would've gone, but I wouldn't have. I'm just saying that I would've gone. We've got Foster in Tennessee. What's up? Hey, what's up,

Casey? What's up, Fights? Basically, I've got one that's going off the Nintendo 64 thing. A good one I heard a while back is I want you to treat me like a old Nintendo 64 game. When times get tough, just blow me and stick it back in. Also, there is a good one.

If you go up to them and say, hey, are you lactose intolerant? They want to make sure you can handle this cheesy pickup line. It's always a go-to as well. Fights? Your thoughts? I think we've established that I'm not going to like any pickup lines.

Just no pickup lines. I don't care for them. The whatever, say blow on it and stick it back in, I'd be like, stop. That one I heard

in fifth grade. I've heard that one. That one was like, that one was absolutely just the boys sitting around talking pickup lines. You want want to go home and play army i'll lay on the floor you blow the hell out of me yeah i heard that one right not nobody said that to me but i've heard that like in like i do think it's just having like been around my guy friends like they'll start saying them like to each other and i hear them i don't know if i've ever heard like did you

fall from heaven one or did it hurt like that one the lactose intolerant one falls in that it's just like what are you doing yeah like I did not like that we've got

Frank in Indy Frank what you got hey Casey this is I just got a small bow to pick with you because you guys are great girls never have to worry

about getting laid if they a girl knows before she goes out if she's having sex or not and the guys actually have to live with them did. A girl knows before she goes out if she's having sex or not. Did I ever say that was the opposite?

No, you just said that. Someone said that girls got it so easy and you're like, no, no, you know. I thought he meant that the N64 thing was an easy way to do it. Okay, because you're a smoke and

there's no way you ever have to worry about stuff like that. But just want to let you know. Thanks for the call. That might have been a pick up line. I mean, you compliment me. I'm like, hi Frank, what's up? Why don't you send in a love letter to the show so we can talk about it?

Speaking of, I was supposed to get a love letter. Were you on the air when is it Keebler? I don't you send in a love letter to the show so we can talk about it? Speaking of, I was supposed to get a love letter. Were you on the air when, is it Keebler? I don't know. Somebody called in and said he was going to write me like the best love letter of all time. And we haven't gotten it. We're moving. This is sad. I do not know.

Kevin was like, you better send it in this week. And he was like, all right, it'll be there in a few days. Now I just might never get it. No, you probably won't. Sad. No, girl, it is a million percent easier for girls to go out and get laid. But I don't think that it's a 10 out of 10 every time time like i've been out with girlfriends who are going out to try to find somebody to go home with and they're they just don't want to lower their standards to just like

the worst guy in the bar right i mean you go out and you're like i gotta go home brad pitt tonight you might struggle a bit but if you go home and you're thinking i just do lightning rod tonight then you know this is actually this is another thing i know you're not a normal guy but you can like that we have to preface everything with that but well it's because you don't think the way that everybody else thinks so i do need to be a person casey yeah you're special very special kissy kissy um my first weekend that i had girlfriends come visit me in boston so i had been in boston for a little bit none of my girlfriends had not come up at the time i was in a serious relationship so i hadn't't, when I was going out, I wasn't going

out to try to find people. I was going out to just meet people. Cause I didn't know a single person when I moved to Boston. What do you mean? He's going out to meet people. Well, like I had, like I met one girl that lived in my building and she was like, Hey, like, let's go out. And she's like, I can, you can meet my group of friends. I meant like she, like she was introducing me basically. I didn't know a soul when I moved to Boston. So then when my girlfriends come up, just not knowing anybody, just like living by yourself. I mean, at first I was like, this is kind of weird.

And after a while I was like, oh, I don't have to hang out with anybody if I don't want to. But my girlfriends came up and I very quickly found out the difference in the way that guys pick up girls in the Northeast in comparison to the South, because they both went out. It was St. Patrick's Day weekend and they both went out. We went out to Southie. They just wanted to hang out with somebody. They wanted to hook up. They wanted to meet somebody like whatever. They were like not on the prowl to the point where it was like desperate, but they're like, I'm open to this.

And we do what we normally did in Texas is you just sit at a bar a group of girls and you're going to be approached yeah that does not happen in Boston and it was like a shell shock to all of us because we were like this is 180 degrees different because guys in the south will come up to you like the guys you know whether it's cheesy pickup lines or not they will approach a group of girls that's just never gonna happen yeah it will happen with guys you don't want to i think the guys you want to approach you just why is that i don't know it's always that was a shell shock to me the opposite way when i went down south to school and like every night guys would just be like i could go talk to that girl at the bar why it's just because it's colder like like just people are colder personalities uh that's probably part of it, yeah. I do not have an answer for you.

I can't, I don't know. One of the explanations I got from my friend in Boston who grew up there, went to school there, just never left, was he was like, most of the time if a girl or a group of girls wants you to come up to them, they make it known, and if they don't, then if you go up to them, they're going to curse you out.

I never thought that. It could be that. Honestly, it's like breathing. I don't know how it happens. It's just something I've known my whole life. You just don't approach girls. I don't know why. None of my group of friends are like, I have that one friend.

But aside from that, no one is like, when we go to a bar, let's just go hang out at the bar. Well, that's why the call that just said girls are going to go, they can get laid whenever they want. It depends on the pickup style, too. Like, if a girl doesn't want to put herself out there and then goes to a place like Boston where guys are not going to come up to you, kind of out of stalemate. Yeah, you better get a vibrator. Or, like, Tinder or something.

Skip all of that. All right. By the way, you've never had to be on dating apps, right? You've never done the dating app thing? I've never done dating apps because I've always been scared of them. Because I've always, they've, I've been at Barstool, so a rather known person for as long as dating apps have been around. Yeah. So I would always be like, oh, people are just going to like screenshot it. We had like, it really drove home when we first moved here. We had like an intern search and there was an intern who was here for the first time.

And the moment he got in the door and got tweeted a picture of him or whatever, girls were just tweeting me, like, this is what he says on Tinder. I was like, that's an intern who's been on this for one, literally been known at Barstool for three minutes. I was like, I'm not risking that. That's the same thing. I've always done that, too. It's not even that my game is particularly bad or anything like that, which it is.

But there's context. Anytime you're reading a text message you can read a text from my mom and you'd be like this dude's fucking weird. And it's just text conversations that don't translate unless you're in the moment. Yeah, I've never been on one partly because of that and also partly just because I'm usually

in a relationship or seeing somebody but I can't imagine how the game has completely changed. Like people that are in college now. I don't think they really work. I mean, I have friends who are on it that they work to get to like hook up. I don't know. I don't think I know anybody. I'm in for that.

I thought I would think that like even like it's just a bunch of bullshitting conversation that never ends and actually meeting. No, I think my girlfriends who like bumble or whatever, like they usually will at least go out on a date as I've got as we've gotten older. It's like they'll like meet for like a drink or meet for lunch or whatever in college or like right out of college. Like it was used for hookups. Like they'd be like, oh, let's go to this bar. And then they were going to hook up. But I would assume now in college, people don't even know how to pick up people in bars. They don't. They've never had to do stuff like that.

Yeah, I would give them obviously social media is slowly eroding our social skills. Yeah, and they don't even have to buy girls drinks. They just have to swipe right. Corey in St. Louis, what you got? So one of my friends, the girl,

she, back in college college there was a guy he came up to her in the bar one night and said I he said I bet you can't make me come and he's like oh yeah all right so she literally took him out back and bullied him now that is one that I would have never thought would work in a million years that's yeah wait he said that to her? yeah he came up to her

and said that oh I thought she said that to him no no he came up to her and said that in a bar that's like the he's like

cause he you know she took it like it's like almost like an insult I guess you know thinking like you know she's not hot enough to do that or something

and so she took it as a challenge and he literally took him out back and blew him behind the bar. That's crazy just because that's like. That's a girl with no self-esteem. Oh, I would say that's like the Golden State Warriors, like challenging like a YMCA team. Like I could challenge this table to make me come. It probably wins. Like a girl would be like, it's not even, it's not even a game like what are you talking about is it no i i mean obviously he knew that

she could it's more the fact that the girl was like i just she must have been like either she was so sure like she's got like a skill set that she just knew would work or she has no self-esteem because i can't imagine being like, well, yeah, obviously you're a guy. Like I, I feel like I could probably do that,

but I'm not going to take you out back and do it. Yeah, that's true. That's true. I guess if you're like, if you, if you got a secret weapon, you like to let that shit show.

I, I don't think taking him out back behind a bar would be my move. If you got, if you got a move, you want, you want people to know, like I got to move. Like you think the Gluck Gluck

9000 is happening outside of bars? Probably not. I would guess yeah. Bad blowjobs don't happen outside of bars. Only great blowjobs do. That's a fair point. If you're displaying something in public, you're good

at it. I'm not playing the guitar in public because I can't play the guitar. If you're playing the guitar at a fucking beach campfire, you can play the fucking guitar, bro. Yeah, but I also could see it being like a desperate move too where it's like, well, if I don't take this guy out there, then he's not going to like, we're not going to go home together,

so I might as well do it. Not me. I'm saying I could see that happening. I feel like the fact that that guy said that and then it worked right away. It makes me weep for our, for humanity. Ah, I'm proud of it.

What if a girl said that to a guy? Oh, run for the hills. So say it's the same thing, but reverse, except now I'm the YMCA team. Like, yeah,

man, I know you'll fucking mop the floor with me. Oh, I can't make you come. No shit. I can't do algebra either. What am I going to do? That actually makes me weep for humanity. Not the original thing.

Ramsey, what's up? What's going on, guys? I'm 100% with fights. First of all, I think pickup lines are probably the most cringeworthy thing. That being said, I do have a buddy who is a master at his craft. What he does is he kind of just notices something about the girl

and one that kind of sticks out to me that he always uses is your face is symmetrical or you have good eyelashes. It's a good opening pickup line and it's weird because who the hell notices eyelashes on a girl? But it fucking works and it gets them in every time.

I've tried that before. You have? Not the eyelash thing like that, but it's like complimenting something on them. And every single time it plays out like Lloyd. Like, I'm like, hey, I like your dress. They're like, thanks. I'm like, see you later.

Big gulps, huh? Like, all right. Good stuff. Carry on. Well, you have to do something. Like, if somebody came up to me, if a guy came up to me and said, I like your eyelashes, my first two thoughts would be, you're either gay or you know that this is going to, because it's like eyelash extensions.

Like, guys don't notice girls have eyelash extensions. But girls do. My gay guy friends do. I heard the same thing goes for shoes. I heard. From what? Legally blonde? No, like you compliment.

If you compliment a girl's shoes, like gay guys do that. This is all very much like you piece your left ear, you're gay. Stereotypes. Well, no, I mean, eyelashes. I feel like he's probably right. Guys don't notice girls eyelashes. But like if a guy came up to me and was like, oh, like you have really nice eyelashes. Like, how did you even notice them?

Shoes, I feel like if somebody said that I like your shoes is one thing if they knew the brand of them right away. Other than like Louboutins, because obviously those are red bottoms. But there's that scene in Inlegally Blonde where he's like, don't go snapping your last season Prada shoes at me, honey. It's like, you're gay. You would never notice last season. But we're just stereotyping at this point. It's not great.'re gay. Like you would never, would never notice last season, but they were just stereotyping at this point. It's not great. Brock from Arizona. What's up? Hey, what's going on guys? So this is always my go-to. So you're at a, you're at a really crowded bar,

right? And you're kind of waiting for a drink. Some fine lady is besides you. You kind of turn to her like you're just going to start some chit-chat and you say hey there ever met a guy with a two-inch penis and she kind of gives you like this look say hey brock nice to meet you shake your hand it's one of those you really catch him off guard and then you know just have a meat out of the palm of your hand that's kind of like the the one you liked fights yeah you down with that one uh i gotta be honest I don't doubt Matt Perron just texted me What did he say? He said that he goes up to a girl and he'll say Hey, have you ever met a guy with a two inch penis?

And then she'll either say yes or no And then you stick out your hand and say Brock, nice to meet you Yeah, I mean You okay with that one? It's okay It's alright Does it pass the fights test?

No, but it's very difficult to pass it It's fine That takes the confidence But, I don't know Just say hi, I think It's very difficult to pass it. It's fine. That takes the confidence. But I don't know. Just say hi. Can I buy you a drink? Yeah.

I don't even offer a drink. I just say hi. And this is, you know, once every solar eclipse. You say hi. Now I'm between you being creepy. I'm just like, hey, nice to meet you. I'm John. Okay, that's different.

Hi. You like slid up next to her and you're like, hi. Hi. Hi.. I was like, hey, nice to meet you. I'm John. Okay, that's different. Hi. You like slid up next to her. You're like, hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. You like to kissy kissy. 833-85-STOOL.

We're going to take our last commercial break of CCK. We want to hear from you guys. Best pickup lines. And also, I want to hear from the girls out there. What is the pickup line that would make you go home with somebody the fastest? Like our girl Jen with the N64. 833-85-STOOL. We'll be right back.