KFC Radio - CCK Podcast: I Can Show You The World

Episode Date: November 11, 2019

The best Disney songs, KFC is a candiadte to replace Mike Francesa (According to The Big Lead), how long would it take Feitelberg to chop down a tree, going to the gym, trying to figure out TikTok, the Harlem shake, autotune with Timeflies, You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Kevin, you're just ridiculously stupid. Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back. Welcome, welcome, welcome. Is this Kevin? Welcome back. Oh, yeah, man, welcome Is this Kevin? Welcome back Oh yeah man, how you doing? You good?

I know you like that I know you like that How long you been back? Welcome, welcome, welcome I see the girls in the club, they getting wild The whole gang's back together A little CCK action for you The Rockets back, Casey Smith's alongside

And we're here to do the damn thing. Yeah. Hey, Kevin. Your hair looks great today. Does it? Yeah. I just got back from the gym. Oh.

On a Tuesday? On a motherfucking Tuesday. We going up. I just got back from the bar. On a Tuesday. Can I have a little lunch drink? Yeah. I would rather do.

Your KFC radio partner, you know, he just likes to have a drink every once in a while. I don't know if we can blame him at this point. Casey Smith. I think that is a mutual agreement. It wasn't my idea today. Okay, that's fair. That's fair. It wasn't my idea.

So it was proposed to me. I said, yes. A little liquid lunch. Never heard anybody. Yeah. Yeah. No one's in the gym. So I'm fresh out of the shower.

Fresh as a daisy. It does look good. good thank you did you do it by yourself today did i do it by myself did you work out today yes yes yes yes i think even my hair i was like i can do that every day uh yes worked out today by myself what'd you do uh this guy said the the trainer that i've been going to has like a app that just like he lists out all the exercises and shit so today was back and shoulders where'd you go crunch crunch gang the one right here uh 23rd i go to 23rd yeah i used to go to that one it's nice it's nice yeah a lot of game in there so they're gonna get a lot of compliments i'll take it yeah that is a compliment from a gay man it's the best thing in the way more and that's and that's for guys and for girls like When I get complimented by gay men,

it goes way further. A girl is like, whatever. You might be lying. You might be desperate. Who knows? You're a crazy girl. You're irrational. It doesn't matter. Straight guy is like, you don't know what the fuck you're talking about and why are you complimenting me? This is weird. Gay guy, he's in shape. Stereotypically speaking, of course.

He's in shape. He's got good style. He's got a sense of trends and looks. He knows what the fuck's up. I feel like this is like you going on a Tuesday by yourself. It was a step. It was a big step. So this guy, I go every Friday to meet with him. But that's just once a week.

So he's like, you got to go more than just when you come to see me. So like three weeks in a row. So he sets up this app, and I hadn't even logged into the app. And this is last Friday. He's like, so, noticed you didn't even download it. And I was like, oh, well, you know. And so I didn't go at all in between sessions,

and I walk in there like I'm in trouble with the teacher or my girlfriend or something. I have all these excuses ready, and he's like, well, I mean, I don't really care. It's't really care you know it's fine dude he's gonna get paid either way yeah right so he's a good guy mark disalvo's his name runs disalvo training um so yeah man i'm doing it so i just i love it i have to and i told him this like the reason why i wasn't really going to the gym is because i spent like the last like two or three weeks getting the food right. Now I got to get the gym right.

And then put it all together. If I am not like mentally in the spot, I cannot do it. I might as well just not even try. It's like when I'm in a mindset where I'm just like I want to fucking pig out or I'm too stressed or I got too much going on when I'm making all the excuses in my head. I cannot overcome that. Like what my, my body and brain will come up with excuses for absolutely everything. So it took like legitimately a few years of like,

I've been saying like I partied enough. I, I, I lay, I was lazy enough. I did whatever enough worked enough. And now I have no excuses left. My body, my body and my brain's finally like, okay, well, let's do it.

And now I think it's actually easy. How did you do it? Did you do home to the gym, to the office? Or did you do home office, gym office? So I had to go to a parent teacher conference real early today, like 8am. So I was done with that and then came in and I was like way earlier than I usually am and realized I didn't have anything

until 1. So I came in, gym, shower, came back. So I've been like, I've had a whole day. Yeah, it's really nice. You showered at the gym? Yeah. Do you bring your own shower shirt? I've never showered at a gym in my life.

That's normal to shower at gyms, right? Oh, I mean, granted, my gym is right outside my front door now, but sometimes if I want to blow dry my hair and they have all the products that I want to use, if I'm running low on mine, I'm going across the showers. The gym are way better than showers in New York apartments. Way better. Yeah. At nice gyms.

I mean, I get a little grossed out with the idea of the ground. I didn't have flip-flops with me and shit like that. That creeps me out a little bit. They have all the lotions and all the shampoos. Blow dryers are there. Q-tips, deodorant and shit. Dry shampoo. So you usually just go in and go home?

You're not a morning guy? I need to try something. I gotta figure something out. Because I'm just like a gym guy that can't go to the gym. Why not? During the season, it's just like you podcast in the morning, radio in the afternoon, game start

at 7, they end at 1. I was trying for a little while, like bringing the iPad to the gym, but it's like then the internet fucking craps out and it's like, you know, then the internet fucking craps out. And it's like, yeah, it's just this whole fucking... Couldn't you just leave here at like 4.30? Yeah.

That's the other thing too. I mean, I went for like 50 minutes today. I'm not talking about like a three-hour session. I'm like, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, get this shit done and I'm out. They don't have steam rooms there, do they? I did not notice one, but I was kind of in and out today,

so I didn't really give it a whole look around. That's the reason I shower at the gym, too. It's because I like to go lay in the steam room afterwards. I'm not going to put my dirty clothes back on. Oh, yeah. Yeah, big time. Big time. Steam rooms in girls' locker rooms are weird, though.

Oh, I can see. Well, I mean. Not weird. Everything that goes on in a girls' locker room, it's just that much weirder in a guys' locker room. I think so, too. I mean, I can't believe, like like even my first trip back to the gym in probably like two years,

and I see this guy with his leg up on the fucking sink. I'm like, that's like a stereotype. Like that's a joke that I make that I didn't even think is actually happening anymore. I joke around about the guy. And he was kind of young. He wasn't an old guy. How old were you talking?

No gray hair, beard, kind of look like you almost like a middle eastern you like a dark complexion and he fucking leg up and I think he was doing something to his foot I want to say he was clipping his toenails or whatever so rather than sitting on a bench or just not doing that at all

sitting there like balls dangling like a fucking grandfather clock like tick tocking in the wind with his foot up on the thing and I'm just like you've got to know that thatling like a fucking grandfather clock, like tick tocking in the wind with his foot up on the thing. And I'm just like, you've got to know that that's like a cliche. You're a cliche right now. Yeah. Why is it?

I mean, I understand why it's a cliche for you guys, but like every girl walks around, not every girl. That's not fair. But like a lot of girls just walk around completely naked and no one thinks anything. You ain't got balls, girl. I don't know when there's old balls hanging. It's weird. I think it's weird.

I mean, boobs are not great when they're old either. I guess. i i mean i don't know why you're not weirded out by that i don't think anything of it i also think it's like all right you're naked like are they putting their legs up in the air that's a little weird no but because there's good the steam room is it's a weird place like you walk what goes on in the steam room that's what i'm trying to tell you are people fucking in the steam room no no no one's touching each other, but there's no rules once you go in the steam room. What is going on? Legs are up on the wall. It's a whole thing in there.

What do you mean? People lay down on the bench. They have the rows, stadium seating of the benches. Girls will lay with their legs all the way up the wall. Why? Because you're stretching. You're stretching with the steam. Why? Because you're stretching.

Okay. So you're stretching with the steam. It's like a hot yoga room. Everybody's completely naked. It's like their pussy against the wall? No, no, no, no, no. Like just their legs. Like their feet are on it,

not like their legs flush against it. I feel like if you go in the corner, there's going to be like, you know what I'm saying? I've never looked close enough to see if people are 90 degrees. I personally don't like putting my legs up on the wall. Like I would rather just lay flat. That's my preference. I feel like if you go in the corner, there's going to be like, you know, I've never looked close enough to see if people are 90 degrees. I personally don't like putting my legs up on the wall. Like I would rather just lay flat.

That's my that's my preference with my like hands behind me. But, you know, people have different things they like to do. I got to get up in a female locker room. I'm going to hide in the corner of this team. I had this weird thought the other day because like obviously everybody's doing the whole, you know, gender inclusive thing. Like, is at some point they're going to be like, well, Hey,

like I, I identify as a female. I should be allowed in the female locker room at Equinox in New York City. I think one day, maybe a long time in the future, it's just going to be one like androgynous race. Like everyone's just going to be like,

well, you got to, you got to pussy, whatever, you know, or maybe everyone will have like the same haircut. Everyone will wear the same clothes. It'll be like the future where everyone's in like metallic silver onesies and it's just like i don't know we don't even fuck anymore like you ever see demolition man they

just put on that headset and they have sex no yeah it's like a leonardo dicaprio home tape it was a uh a uh sylvester stallone movie where he goes into the future it's funny too because you go back and i'm pretty sure the future was like 2006 in this movie. And they put this headset on, and they just push a button, and then you come. What? There's no everything so far in the future. And Stallone is frozen, and he comes back,

so he's still got his mind from 1999. And he's like, let's fuck. And she's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. That's not how we do this. But that's where we're going, man. That's where we're going. So everybody will put their fucking balls and vaginas on the wall of the steam room.

Nobody's putting that on the walls. But it is a very weird scene. Like, I have described it to people before who have, like, never been in a steam room. And this is consistent. It wasn't, like, a one-time thing. No, because it's, like, it's obviously it's very dark. You just have the steam everywhere. It's not like a sauna where there's, like, the red lights and everything.

Like, it's just dark in there. They have, like, one little light. Isn't it so weird? Like, humans are so weird when they think they're like... When you think you're not being watched, they'll do some weird shit. But the thing is, you are... I'll just do whatever I want.

You are being watched to a certain degree because it's not pitch black in there. You obviously have to see a little bit. Well, that's almost it though, right? It's like that... I play by the rules all the time. I feel like even... What's the rules for a naked steam room? No, I'm just saying even when I'm home by myself,

someone could be watching. Or you just go naked? No, you wear a towel in there. Everyone wears towels in there. And then everybody has differing degrees of how much they still wear that towel. Got it. That's fucked up.

I mean, just think about all the shit that you see in the gym and now compare that to like the hotels. It's like, you're not seeing it, but it's like, you know, how, how thorough are we being in these, in these cleanings before I'm taking over this hotel? You know, it's very funny that you just said a crunch is a gay, a gay gym. That one. I don't know about other ones, but that one, I was remember the entire time we were at

the old office cause it was easy to just pop over after work. Um, it, and then my gay friends live in new york like to pop into that one because they said the gay scene there is very good i i was hooking up with a girl a while back who had a gay uh a gay friend who like he said it's like a goddamn free-for-all in his gym really everybody's hooking up fucking and crazy i don't even talk to people at the gym. Yeah. Like where and when, like,

I mean, I guess it's like kind of doing sex in public anyway. It's like, you always find a bathroom or a corner or a closet or whatever. But I'm like, Oh really? I'm just here to like lift some very lightweight and get the fuck out of here. Like,

I think, uh, I, I go to infrequently to have met anyone here, but my gym in Saugus, that was a community. That was a fraternity. Those were the dogs, the original dogs. Yeah, that was something special.

You're smashing fists and elbows and forearms like the Bash Brothers. You go there, everyone went every day. They went at the same time, all the same dudes. Oh, yeah. You get the needles out, get the fucking the same time. Get the needles out. Get the fucking Andro out. Let's do it. That's honestly what I could use. He was massive.

We can find a solution. I bet you can get it at that crunch. You think? When you're there, just look around at some of the trainers. A couple guys that were fucking massive. Look at that were fucking massive. That ain't fucking natural. In that one, you can go downstairs, obviously, to where the weights are. If you go to where the back is, where the actual

free weights are, they're always hanging out back there. It's very funny when I go there, too, by the way, because I'm like, where are the 20s? Everyone else is fucking curling 80s and shit like that. I'm like, I'll just take these. Thank you very much. Or go to the main floor. Go to the back where the CrossFit area is

where they have the turf where you can push the sleds. That's where I fell on my face on that back extension machine. Remember that? That's where that crime happened. Did we ever find the tape of that? No, they wouldn't give it to me. Right, right, right. They wouldn't give it to me. And I know they had it because it was beautiful. They probably still watch it. Yeah. You go back there.

On the T-Rex machine. Gym wife is just, it's not for me, man. Work out there for a little bit, then come to the Equinox. You find pretty girls immediately. Yeah, but it's like a million dollars a month. It's not. And I know I'm in a fall off. It's not that much more than crunch.

Yeah, Equinox is just a social club that has weights there. Right, right. Occasionally you bring a sweat. I mean, nobody, it's not like everyone's like hanging around talking. The difference is you can take classes. Well, the difference is that everyone's fucking in the steam room. Apparently. Yeah.

Yeah. It's not, it's not just like a, so it's not like the Soho house where everyone's like hanging out. It's more of like the amenities are much nicer and you get free classes and it's Equinox. I just want it to work so much faster than it does. You know what I mean? Working out. Yeah. I'm want it to work so much faster than it does. What do you mean, working out? Yeah, I'm just like, okay, I've committed

and now reward me, god damn it. And it's just like, well, okay, it'll take about 12 more weeks. It's a long fucking time. It really depends. It depends on the look that you're going for. It also depends on what you're eating. But I'm eating good.

I'm good on eating. What? Sleeping is a big part of it, too. A lot of water. I don't know. A lot of water. I need to drink more water. You're supposed to drink like four or five of these a day. I just smoke to go to sleep every night and I don't know if that means it's a good sleep or not.

Say that again? When I don't have my kids I smoke to go to sleep every single night. I don't know if that's a good sleep or a bad sleep. That's because as long as you're not I mean granted obviously now people are saying it more but it's medicinal. I'm not saying it's medicinal for you, but doctors wouldn't prescribe that for people for anxiety if it was like horrible for your health.

Yeah. I'm just saying it's like, you know, when you go out drinking, you like sleep like a rock, but you don't wake up like, oh, I'm refreshed. It's like you poisoned your body. You can also overdose on alcohol. You can't overdose on weed. Yeah. I mean, I've tried.

I'm sure it's not the healthiest thing in the world, but I don't think that it's bad. So I'm getting good sleep. They don't tell, like, cancer patients. What time do you go to bed? I don't really have a specific time, but I don't go late. Like, how late are we talking? Like, midnight at the latest.

Oh. And what time do you get up? 6.30. Jesus Christ. I don't remember the last time that I saw 6.30 on purpose. Yeah, on purpose. That's like seven hours. As an adult, you're not going to get more than like seven hours.

Seven hours. I mean, I haven't gotten seven hours. Well, you guys are children. Nobody else is getting it. I mean, everyone else in the world getting seven hours is like, that's a lot. Is it? I think so. For like adults?

I don't have any responsibilities i mean i mean if you have kids forget it if you have a normal time job forget it if you have any sort of commute forget it and if you want to have any sort of nightlife or watch shit you know tv at night or watch a game that goes late or whatever that's the key like if you work a normal job and then you have to like like last night sunday night football ends like what? Midnight or Monday night football. Like you're waking up at five 36. Yeah. We don't have to do that though. Yeah.

I mean, I, on the road, on the road, obviously it's different, but at home, if I go to sleep at one and wake up at eight 30, I'm good. Yeah. So that's the same thing. That's like seven, eight hours, you know, I need more than that. I mean, I could use like 12 the other day. Uh, what was it? It was like, this was a Saturday.

It was a day. I didn't have my kids and I just turned all could use like 12. The other day, what was it? I guess it was a Saturday. It was a day I didn't have my kids, and I just turned all alarms off and shit, and I slept till like 11, and I was like, whoa. Woke up in like a panic. Like, oh my God, who's dead? What happened? What's going on? And I could have gone for like 12 more.

Friday into Saturday this past weekend, I went to bed at 12.30, and I woke up at 3 p.m. It's the first weekend that I've gotten to sleep since February. Sober. Wow. That's a diesel night. Yeah. 15 hours we're talking?

Yeah. That's crazy. I don't even think, like, even at my tiredness, my body should not let me do that. I can do that. Yeah. I'm due for one every like one every like six months it's like hibernation yeah it's like a reset hibernation i remember i'll do that as soon as

you know like 12 one like on the regular yeah but once there's something that happens being hibernation once football's over i will do that and then i'll be good until yeah like halfway through the summer you could probably do that if If you just, you guys are funny. You guys act like your sports are like tours of duty at war. Oh no, no, but it's no, I love my tour of duty. Don't you get me wrong?

No, but I'm saying it's like, I mean, you can't physically do anything other than baseball. You need to hibernate after the football season. Yeah. Oh yeah. Because just watching sports guys.

No, it's, and it's the best thing ever. Don't again, like every time people complain about having to stream up here, it's like, yo, you're literally going to watch it at home or you're going to watch it here

and watch it. Like I had to stream every weekend. I don't care. But the difference is, is you can't, I can't sleep through a Saturday. I can't, I mean,

I could technically sleep through like a Sunday night. I have to be up here on Sundays when that's done. I'm just not, I'm just going to pass out for like two days. Like who cares? Like no one will care if I'm asleep for two days. I guess it was once i had kids once i had kids and then like once they were like once shea was a little bit

older once i had keegan like every morning i had to wake up i would wake up like fuck i wish i was sleeping i wish i didn't have to do this i and then like when we had to do activities and when i couldn't watch games or shows like it was always in my head like I wish I was doing that I wish I was doing that I wish I was doing that I don't want to be doing this I don't want to be doing and then eventually it just becomes life and I'm just like it's just part of it yeah it's like you know when I when I have my kids at night that's all I do I pick them up I and it's like bath dinner and then bedtime the entire night it takes like four hours to put them to sleep and it used to be like I would rip my hair out being like oh I'm missing this game or i wanted to watch i wanted to binge a new season of this or that it's just

like well that doesn't happen anymore i just i just have to fight them until they go to sleep and then i'm so tired i go to sleep yeah and it's just like well that's that's how it goes now you have humans depending on you yeah but for so long it was like i was doing it but my mentality was like i don't want to be doing this i wish i was having fun or i was getting to do what i want and now it's just like well it's almost like you know when you first start working at a college you're like this sucks every day this sucks i mean it sucks and then eventually you're just like well this is what i do now it's like i can't complain every single time you know now i've just turned the corner where i'm like your brain is like oh i have to be responsible yeah it's like people like me and jared can like i'll text my girlfriend

and be like hey i'm not gonna talk to you till probably sunday i'm gonna turn my phone off i'm just gonna sleep no one gives a shit i wish i could just throw my phone in the river it's nice and like i probably could for the most part but it's just always like the what if you know what i mean like and also like what we do for a living you have to at least be paying attention but sometimes i could like make i could say to myself like i'm not fucking like i'm not tweeting today like whatever i'm done and i'd be like, fine. Maybe I'd miss something, but it's whatever. It's the

big old what if. I feel like you talking about all these experiences has made me not want kids so much. I know. You have to remember though, it's not like anybody comes in here and I'm just going to be like, let me tell you about this awesome moment I had with my kids and how great, you know,

it's like, you're only here on the bad side, but I am, but it is real. There are good sides, but I just know how picky I am when it comes to sleep. And just like, I'm not a morning person as it is. Even if I do say I go to bed at like 10 o'clock and I got to wake up at like six 30 or something like that. Like that's a perfect amount of time to sleep it's just not the right time yeah it's like like i would still wake up and be like oh my god i feel like i just got hit by a fucking if you got eight hours from from you know 2 a.m to you know whatever to 10 a.m or whatever you're fine but it's it's just that

6 30 i mean this is like a mental thing or like what i don't get that your body's just used to it yeah that's what it to it. Yeah. That's what it is. It's like when... But it's the same amount of time. Right, but for some reason, it's a thought process. You wake up in the early a.m. And it's like whatever, if it's light or dark out, depending on what time of year it is.

And it's all... And yeah, it's all in your head. Like, I should be... I could be sleeping more. When you have to get up and start your day because it's like, all right, it's a lot. You have to do it. Right. Versus like, well, I couldn't roll back over for two hours.

When I was working, doing the BST in Boston, we'd get off of air at midnight. Every night, go home, your body has to unwind, whatever. I'm going to sleep like 2.33, have to sleep until 11 for my body to feel normal. When I moved to New York and didn't have that schedule anymore, if I woke up earlier than 11, I was pissed. Even though I was going to sleep way earlier. I was like, no, I know I could be sleeping till 11. That's what I needed.

Then once you get used to it, you're fine. It's more about the responsibilities and why you're getting up. It's not the other thing, too. It's like if you – I knew guys who like they were not morning people at all, but they love fishing. And if they're going on like an early fishing expedition, they'll be up at like 3.30 in the morning to get there by 4 to take off. If you're going on vacation, if you know you're getting on an airplane – Christmas morning, get up at whatever. I know I'm getting on an airplane to go like a tropical place i don't give a fuck what time i'll

be there bright and early yeah willie was talking yesterday about how he has to lift in the morning because he's oh my god because he's always worked out in the morning like being a professional athlete i was like yeah but you're not a professional athlete anymore you could live whatever he was like no i mean granted he does barcelona breakfast so that makes a difference he was like i've never gotten out of the habit of waking up that early that's a good thing to stay in but so when so he's got to be here for 7 a.m start he's got to lift before that and i think if i remember correctly he says he lifts at 5 30 but that might not be right with i mean because if you live it's like a quick lift and from he gets he probably has it i mean let's be

honest he has it in his house right i mean right So you just did like a half hour banging out and then commute in. But I couldn't, I could, I wish, man, I wish I was one of those people. I'm like, I've tried to tell myself that too.

Like, like I do get up early still and I don't have to be here till later. So like get up, stretch, like do a little light workout, eat healthy, put on some music, put on the radio,

like enjoy your morning. And instead it's just like, nah, this sucks. Once on some music, put on the radio, enjoy your morning. And instead it's just like, nah, this sucks. Once you get done working out in the morning though, after, it's the best thing ever. I'm pretty happy now that I'm like, okay, well. You're done. Yeah. But making yourself do it, terrible. That's what I need to do.

That's what I need to change my ways. I need to go to sleep earlier and wake up earlier. You can do that. I'm all for it, Jared, but it's also I am a big proponent of just being realistic. You're probably not going to do that, so why don't we find something for you to do at night? Because you're not going to do that.

He's watching The Office. He's had 30 years of this way, though. Yeah, I know, but it's just like, I don't know. I feel like I could train my body to not be the way that I am. It's not great to just fucking like be up until like 3 a.m and then wake up at like fucking eight well you know what i think it depends on what you're doing late at night like feidelberg has this this like moment of bliss every night at like 3 a.m because there's no more games on yeah most of our east coast

twitter is gone yeah and he's just like, and he's a fucking lunatic, you know, he's a depressed lunatic. So he just sits there like 3am like in silence and he's like happy about it. Reads a book. Maybe he reads, doesn't just turns off the,

turns off the brain, turns off the phone. What time does he wake up? Uh, pretty late. You know, he's probably waking up at like 10 gets here by like 12, you know,

10, 11. Huh? I've, I've started doing the reading thing he's 100 right about just feeling smarter you just read you're like i'm smarter than everybody else around me because i'm reading this book i've definitely thought about like i i get worried like i need to become interesting again like i need to learn some shit like learn some new topics learn some new things and hear about some new people so i can talk about things on shows and radio because it's like when all you do is you know i did all this i go home i watch a game watch some tv deal with kids repeat you're not that interesting of a person yeah you're not learning anything you can't contribute to anything you can't you're

not up on current events you're not you don't have an opinion or like a you know an angle or whatever it's like i feel like when i was young and you're out like you're just interesting by nature it's like well i saw this when i was like on my way to the bar and then i saw this happen at the bar and i talked to this person afterwards and then i commuted home and saw that and you're just doing things when you're just like from point a to point b and you go back to point a and back to point b and you do this with the kids you do it's just like roundhog's day it's like what do you have to talk about anymore i felt like an old person last night as soon as the game was over which again midnight i was like opened up a book and i was like i'm gonna read this for one chapter and then i ended up reading it for like hours because it was so good i was like this

is what my mom has said for years that is so much fun to do and then i was like i'm tired i'm gonna go to bed i can i felt so accomplished the thing is what i should has said for years that is so much fun to do. And then I was like, I'm tired. I'm going to go to bed. And I felt so accomplished. The thing is what I should be reading, like the shit that my brother reads, like he's read every book under the sun about like all the stuff that we should know about. How to like grow your brand and how to market yourself. He's reading some book about like that takes marketing yourself as if you were in a movie. Like think about, you know, if you were the hero of the think about you know if you were the hero of the movie but you're not actually the hero of the movie you're like the narrator of the movie you need to build this print it all sounds like fascinating and i'm sure if i knew that shit

i could like put it to really good use and i could like grow this social media account and grow this and i just don't do it but you're a red wine guy so just like drink some red wine watch whatever you want to watch first that's what i found like i had to watch the end of the game last night watch the whole thing whatever then it's like okay i'm gonna pour a glass of red wine i'm gonna i'm reading about attachment styles right now very interesting what's that like adult attachment styles where it's like how attachment styles is that what you're saying to me yeah attachment styles how you attach to other humans it is fascinating it is like. I feel like. Yeah. See, that sounds like you're smart.

Like, what does that mean? Like, so like how you types of attachment types and like how you interact, like not only in like relationships, family attachment, work attachment, sex attachment, like they don't do, they actually take out the child attachment, like the parent child, like they kind of allude to it. Sometimes this is just about adult attachment. So like mostly in like romantic relationships or very close intimate relationships but why you end up becoming close to people and

why those relationships usually go like this like they separate it is fascinating yeah and i'm like i'm reading this i'm drinking some red wine i'm not getting like drunk i'm just enjoying this i'm like this is something that i would have never done and you can like apply that to other things yeah it's like there was a quiz you can go read like beach books and it's like oh that was a you know a great mystery or something like that and it's fine but what are you gonna do with that like this something like this is like i feel like your brain's actually getting like i woke up this morning before my whole life shattered into pieces this morning i looked over and saw that book and i was like i actually want to pick that back up and keep reading and i was like that's how i know i'm

actually learning something when you want to learn you back up and keep reading. And I was like, that's how I know I'm actually learning something. When you want to learn, you know, but I don't, I had such aspirations being like, you know, I don't know how this is going. I was just like, I'm going to have a few days a week now where like, I'm not going to be with my kids. I'm going to put it to use. I'm going to like, I'm going to take a class. I'm going to go learn something. I'm going to, I'm going to travel.

I'm going to like rekindle i'm gonna connect with old friends and it's like i don't do any of that man no i mean the gym has been like the biggest step i i feel like there's probably i don't know because in one breath i feel like the one thing i want to get better at is like live entertainment and like attempt to uh some sort of stand-up live podcasting thing but in the same breath i feel like if you take a class for that you ain't the one you know what i mean it's like and maybe i'm wrong but i i don't think if you sat down with bill burr he'd be like well i signed up for my local like theater class and it taught me how to do it's like you be the god of it you don't right but i think there's

like probably some things i could like learn to put into practice um that was really the only class i ever considered yeah like i don't know if there's some other writing class like i already write you know why do you need that yeah i already it's like what what what do i want to be better at that i'm not it would probably that would probably be it but i guess the gym is kind of the first step it's funny how long it takes to like i mean my divorce was so long and drawn out and shitty so like it's been a couple years but it's really only technically been like a couple weeks you know what i mean like it's like it's only legal freedom yeah and like and and then you know i think of it as like the

seinfeld analogy when he talks about breaking up with someone is like knocking over a soda machine you gotta like it takes a couple tries you don't just knock it over in one shot where it was like like i said i'm like okay i'm single so i'm gonna do this all right and then that runs a course and i'm gonna do that and i think just now is where i'm starting to be like in a spot where i think i'm like a healthier person who's like thinking a little more clearly and knows like what i want how to go do do it. Like, I think I needed a couple of almost like seriously, like two years to like fail and fuck it up and figure it all out. You know what I mean? Now it's like,

I think I'm for the first time ready to like try to put some of these, uh, good practices into, you should read this book I'm reading. Yeah. I mean, I, I honestly,

that sounds like the worst thing. Like that's when you're an old person needs to kill yourself. You should, if I start to read a book that you recommend before I read like 30 books that he's recommended, he'll probably kill me. That's probably true. Fact. No, he's like, no, no, because he probably heard the kind of book I was saying. You should read it.

You know what? He should probably read that. Yeah. No, I, I just feel like, uh, he's maybe on the verge of shooting this place up with someone. If someone doesn't take another recommendation of his that later proves to be absolutely true, he'll probably kill somebody.

How crazy would that drive you? That would drive me nuts. It would drive me nuts, but on the same token, I'd be like, well, when are you going to start listening? Well, that's a thing, but nobody else. But that wouldn't piss me off. I'd be the only one who does it. It takes like two and a half years for me to do it. Yeah, that's true. I mean, he's kind of like, well, when are you going to start listening? Well, that's the thing, but nobody else. But like, that wouldn't, that wouldn't piss me off. I'd be the only one who does it. You're the one that doesn't fucking use it.

Yeah, that's true. I mean, he's kind of like, well, whatever. You're only hurting yourself. You can never like come at me for like what I do. Be like, yeah, I'm right all the time. I told you what to do. You didn't do it and you should have done it. And now you're three years behind.

Yes. So let's play catch up now. We had an idea yesterday in the office that stemmed from something that you had told me. And this actually goes all the way back to you talking about working out ria and ellie and i were talking about how we should do once a week we should do a workout class on twitch so we should all work out because i know he's just yeah because he like cleanses no and i said yesterday i was like because bc and i talked about that doing something like that a while back now that we have the game time room and everybody's trying to work out way more.

But that room is too tiny to do like a workout. No, we would, we would somehow we would figure out how to put like an insanity class or whatever. Like one of those group fitness classes that doesn't have to have any equipment. Yeah. And Rhea was like talking to me. She's like, you should lead it. And then we should all be behind you. And we're all working out with the guy on TV.

That would be very funny if you kind of mocks like the jazzercise type of thing but actually work out and then because she i guess she said on her podcast it's a part of my take of working out you know yeah she said on her podcast like can you guys hold me responsible for working out and i guess she got flooded yesterday like ria have you been in the gym have you been in the gym and so it's shame turning to go to the gym so that's that's to me what i tell people whenever i've wanted to get healthier is like shame me make fun of me because that's what motivates me i'm so vain that if i think the internet thinks i'm like fat and ugly that i'll do it but then they do it and i'm like okay this is mean stuff like okay that's enough that's enough only a couple people please it's

it's very sad what actually motivates you to will you do the workout if we do it um probably not no you're gonna have to do it i mean that'll be funny he's coming baby yeah i mean i guess it depends on what it is when these people do like an hour-long spin class it's like non-stop like i cannot do that i can't even do like a quarter of that you guys are crazy we're gonna pick something like 30 minutes long and we're gonna do it and like the hope is is that and ria had a great point she's like what if people start like saying okay i'm gonna work out on this day with Barstool. Pick it once a week. We're going to do it in the evening time. That's how it goes. It would be like having a podcast.

We're going to listen to the podcast on Tuesdays. We're going to work out on this day. We're going to wear Barstool game day workout clothes. It's really a million dollar idea. Thanks to BC. See, I'm listening to BC. I'm listening. He got me on finally on TikTok.

Yeah. So let's hit our break. We're already over a break. I'm going to, I'm going to be the adult Sherpa to guide you through. No, no, that is,

that is the, yes, we're going to talk about fellas, ladies. You have to be on it. Yeah. If you're like Camille Caustic and you like dance and sing, you have to be on it because it's just the next platform. I know it is, but it would be like, if you were like, no, I'm not going on it. Yeah, if you're like Camille Kostic and you like dance and sing. No, no, no. You have to be on it because it's just the

next platform. Oh, I know it is. We'll talk about it. No, I'm not going on Instagram. We'll talk about it. After the break on CCK. When I walk in the spot, this is what I see. Everybody stops and is staring at me. I got passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it. I've been trying to get back to the gym, trying to get healthy, trying to get in shape. I don't know what I did. I did something to my shoulder. I got like this strained muscle, some sort of spasm, absolutely killing me.

And luckily, I got CBD md to help me get through it i got all sorts of different ways i can take it i got the capsules i can just take like a pill i got the roll on it's almost like a deodorant stick it rolls on the like uh the lotion i got the hand cream i got the bath bombs they got peanut butter now which is supposed to be for your dog but it's just dry roasted peanuts ground up with the CBD oil. So I don't see why humans can't eat it either. Tastes just like organic peanut butter with some CBD in it. So if you've got pain, if you've got stress, if you've got restlessness, anxiety, whatever it may be, CBD MD is the best way to relieve you of all of those problems. It is all tested, all organic, all safe. You're not going to fail any tests. You're not going to

worry about being too high. All it does is help you relieve you of all your stress, anxiety, pain, chronic restlessness, all that stuff. Right now, you can get 25% off when you go to CBDMD.com and use the promo code KFC. CBD oils unlock the potential of CBD in your life now. CBDMD.com. Promo code KFC for 25% off. Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin. Kevin. You're just ridiculously stupid. Welcome back, welcome back, welcome back.

Welcome, welcome, welcome. Is this Kevin? Yeah, man, how you doing? You good? I know you like that This fucking fun house I work in I sit down in my goddamn studio Once again alone I don't know where any of my fucking co-hosts are

And I want to just start a nice You know, calm, normal radio show. And I got this dickhead Feidelberg crouching, hiding, while wearing a fucking Edgar Allen Poe mask. And he just pops out of nowhere and scares the dick off me. Yeah, you deserved it.

Why? Why did I deserve it? I don't know. I don't deserve it at all. Yeah, you're right. I'll tell you what, masks are hot, man. Yeah, I feel like you're sweating in there. I'm sweating big time. I'm not taking it off to do radio either, even though I'm only going to do it for like two minutes once Jared's done talking out there. But, I don't know, what's up?

How you doing, man? You want to ask me if you're on post-tribute? Yeah, I feel like you're into masks now that you did the Making a Gambler one. Well, we just did another video. It's officially a mask show. No, no, no, no, no. It wasn't a Making a Gambler video. Oh. It was a not not it's officially a mask show no no no it wasn't making a gambler video oh it was a barstool sports video really okay there's a tiktok it's freaking me out are you on tiktok yet john no i'm not you're gonna do it it's good because you're really

gassed why i mean i understand why you're hot but why are you out of breath because i just did a lap around the office and it's not i think somehow somehow you're more out of shape than I am. No, absolutely. Really? I feel like you're always going to be stronger than me, but you think that I could do more cardio than you right now? No way. Probably.

Really? I mean, I'll be honest. I wasn't gassed while walking into the room, and you are. Well, I mean, I did a – So we finished over here. We did the video over here. John's pointing like 15 feet away, so we finished, um, over here. We did the video over here. John's pointing like 15 feet away, folks.

Yeah. It's like he's pointing outside. Exactly my point. Cause then I sprinted around the whole office to get to you. Okay. Got it. I ran. I saw Cal over by my desk. Got it.

And from there I ran to the KC Radio studio and slammed the door open. Fucking asshole. Thinking you were still in there. And his stupid little fetish with masks scaring me, popping out. Oh, the Harlem Shake was just an all-time. Oh, you did the Harlem Shake with a mask on? Oh, I was, I was refraining from announcing what kind of video oh sorry that's what it was uh john stole the show i'm not gonna give away what he did but it is terrifying and incredible it was genius oh you did it we all we all were wearing masks like spider went and found a box of like

masks they use for advisors and we were all wearing them uh i i can't wait like just yesterday it was like i'm not getting on tiktok fuck that and today it's like give me a mask let me do the harlem shake me i i it's not i would be part of anyone's tiktok ever yeah i just don't i don't know if i could do it myself of course if anyone ever wants me in a tiktok yes i'm in of course oh yeah i'm the same way rio was like hey ellie casey you want to do the harlem shake and i was like yeah and immediately ellie was like no i don't want to ellie was worried she was like i don't know if i can respect myself i'm like out of all out of all the dumb shit all the other dumb dances you do you're gonna you're gonna put that disrespect on the fucking harlem shake and also

just like the harlem maybe it's just the amount of time we've been at this company like i don't have respect no i'll do anything window until they gave me a mask i I was just going to take my shirt off and hold it over my face. Oh yeah. We were all getting masks. I was like, John, you got a mask. Um, I'm forgetting the, like the mean part of it. I thought you guys were just going to do the dance. It was like the, it snaps and everyone changes.

And everyone's just acting like a complete asshole. Right. Well, it's only two people at first. And then it's like, yeah. Okay. Now I'm remembering. You know, it's like the Harlem shake. You guys were just like let's do the home shake no the harlem shake videos that went viral are now super easy to make on tiktok because you just like splice them up yeah so we went

through the song multiple times everyone was doing crazy shit just saying john feidelberg give him an award i made a i made a tiktok today what is it uh my three cone drill because they uh like the song the song going viral on the song being used on tiktok right now is like this like big music like run so it like zooms in on me and then i start running so that's that's that's where i'm learning like uh if you just you just copy other people you just open it up see what other music people are using and then you do it like oh i could do that oh i don't have to be original let's fucking go yeah that's my whole life i just talk about things that other people are doing okay i'm actually sad that you weren't in our tiktok i know i didn't i would i would like to

have been a part of it i just said we should just start doing it all over the city again like bring back the har Shake videos. Like we, Barstool goes to Times Square again, Harlem Shake. I'm going to start planking. Planking. Planking was the stupidest. That one's really not for you.

The mannequin challenge. That was one. I liked the mannequin challenge. I got a kick out of that one. Yeah. I liked the mannequin challenge. It was funny. Um,

we did, uh, I just filmed a video with, uh, Cal from Time Flies, which is, I mean, it might be one of the weirdest things that's

ever going to go on the internet it's cal's corner cal's corner it's like it's like a between two ferns type of like awkwardly intentionally make you uncomfortable so we were sitting like on each other's laps i was like rubbing his legs i kissed his head it got like weird but but he put uh he put auto-tune on my on my voice and was like, all right, give me a mic check. Start singing. And I was like, what? And so I just started going ooh and then on. Autotune is a fucking cheat code, man.

Not like I didn't sound good, but I was like, oh, this is why every singer. Yeah, exactly. But he started freestyling again. It's just disgusting. It's just like, I gave gave him pete davidson and he he went with butthole eyes so like he doesn't even it's not just like okay i heard the word and i know what rhymes he like thinks it through and remembers like the story about him and then two nanoseconds yeah it's it's absolutely crazy he told me uh when when he when he came to

the uh to the office that you know he noticed there was quite a bit of attention after he freestyled. Yeah. Yeah. I'm refraining right now because he's standing right there, so I'm not saying anything. Yeah, I'd say so. Yeah, I mean, if I could have one talent, I think it would be that.

Other than, like, you know, be a professional pitcher or something like that. Yeah, I was going to say throw a little fuss. An everyday, you know, be a professional pitcher. Yeah. I was going to say every day and every day, uh, you know, casual type of skill. I mean, I can freestyle, but then,

like I said, I'd be the most annoying person in the world. Cause I would just constantly freestyle a big, shut the fuck up, dude. Shut the fuck up, dude. At all times.

You would hear me rhyming. Uh, if the door was closed, I would say more things right now. I'm really, really restraining myself. ti i mean that's like a that's like a career killer no no first of all what careers do you have well i don't know i mean you know he's still out he's he's trying to do like tv and entertainment i'm not saying that people are gonna be like he's like canceled or

anything but like, that will be when you say TI, it'll be, remember that time he, his daughter's hymen. So if you didn't hear it, TI said that he goes to the gynecologist every year or whatever, or whatever,

every time she goes to gynecologist with his 18 year old daughter to check that her hymen is still intact. And I honestly, when I saw that, how does a doctor allow that yeah yeah that's a great point especially when you're 18 yeah get the fuck out of here yeah we have dr bachin i know what hippa is bitch right get the fuck out of here robber band man i thought like no matter what she's also 18 super creepy but i thought like this must be a joke like this must have been he's sitting around with like other dads and you know what I mean?

Sort of like a, I'm going to chain my daughter to the radiator. Like, you know, old asshole jokes. Yeah. Uh, but it sounds like it was dead ass serious.

He goes on to say in that same interview, like I think that parents don't do a good enough job of protecting their kids from like failure, like setting themselves up for failure, like dead ass serious. I was going to the doctor to check her hymen also what like in this interview he said um most kids in hindsight looking back they always thank their parents for not allowing them to do damage to themselves as

much as they could have i think that is the exact opposite of what happens like you think that your daughter is gonna look back one day and be like thanks for hounding me and my hymen at the fucking... I mean, by the way, dude, I don't know. Like you said, she doesn't have her hymen. I don't know. She's an 18-year-old girl into the year 2019. The whole thing, and he has a quote on it.

You can not have one of those from sports and bike riding accidents. There's a million reasons. It literally says, he said, T.I. added that he had been of those from like sports and bike riding accidents. There's a million reasons. So it literally says, he said, T.I. added that he had been told the hymen can be broken in activities other than sex, obviously. And his quote was, so I say

look, doc, she don't ride no horses. She don't ride no bike. She don't play no sports. Just check the hymen, please, and give me my results back. There ain't no balance beam in our house. That is insane. i think that's a that's like i think that's going to be a problem she don't ride no horses she don't ride no bikes that is so check that shit out because if it's broken she's having the doctors like doctors

will lie to protect like the well-being of the patient that's that's their thing like she's like yeah she's fine yeah she's got what to do the you know who's thrilled about this quote though is my guy ethan hawk who's going viral again why he's in trouble no no because in 2018 last year he was asked about because his daughter is maya hawke who was um in stranger things she's which girl she's the girl the girl who works at the ice cream shop okay that's abby or anyone whatever yeah yeah but that so he was asked about raising daughters last year i guess probably once she broke it huge with that and he went first of all you know everybody does their own thing but there's but there's this thing that goes around that men are supposed to be scared of their daughter's sexuality i remember my oldest maya when she was turning 16 oh i better keep

a shotgun away by the door or something i was like you know what i'm gonna give my permission to be your own shotgun and if you're and if you're scared of all that sexuality how is she supposed to feel and then he kind of like goes on it's like she doesn't need a dad with a shotgun behind her she can handle herself and she can go out and have a good time and she can make mistakes and she can recover from them this idea of innocence and this idea that we're not allowed to make mistakes you know we're all allowed to make mistakes we're allowed to grow up and if we and if we're just a tiny living in a tiny glass world we won't i've given my daughter permission to make a big fool of herself and if she wants to break some hearts or get her heart broken that's fine like everybody's allowed to fuck everybody's

like he's going viral like let's stay in our king i didn't even do anything i literally just ordered a book like right after this this morning it's called uh it's like strong strong father strong daughter or something that i. I was like, swipe, buy, Amazon, deliver that shit. I don't want to be that guy. I'm going to figure out how to not be TI in any way, shape, or form. I just have a hard time believing that there are a lot of people that do that, that TI. I actually think there are.

There are people that want to believe that it's not happening, but actually going with your 18-year-old daughter to the gynecologist. Yeah, that's a bit extreme, but whenever those fucking pictures at the prom go viral with the hillbilly dads holding the gun up to the boyfriend that's a bit extreme but like you know whenever those fucking pictures at the prom go viral the hillbilly dad's holding the gun up to like the the the boyfriend or the date like those are jokes but they're not you know i'm sure like when when they're getting in the limo they're like hey that was funny taking that picture but also by the way i'm dead serious you know i mean like there are if that's you you're the biggest fucking loser on the

like like just like just not even the whole protecting your daughter aspect of it. I get that. But just thinking that's a funny thing to do. You're a fucking shit. Clearly they all do in that part of the country or whatever it is. They all do that. Did you do that, Casey? No, my dad did not do that.

Your dad wanted to do it and you said no? No. I promise. You don't think I would say that at this point. Like I'm very open about the difference between up here in the South. No, my, was your dad like a, you know, on the porch with a shotgun kind of guy? No, my dad was like, make friends with the guy so that like they would like him so much. Like we, yeah, that's a good tactic. They would go, listen, you know, Mr. Smith, my boy, I'm not fucking you.

They would come by, they would like come by the house because like we live on a golf course. They would come by my house and like ask for for my dad not for me and my younger sister like they'd be like hey is ron home i'm like see this isn't but then like whenever this isn't gonna work this but then whenever like you know at like high school parties or whatever and like shit would pop off like they would be like calling my dad for help too so it was like kind of like what was that like if like there was like fights and stuff like instead of them like calling like if they got in trouble instead of like them calling their dad or whoever, they would call my dad because they know he would like come. But not like cool.

Like you can get away with everything. Yeah. Like cool. Like he's responsible, but also he's like your friend won't be like a dick about it. And then I just realized my friends liked him way more than me. So it was kind of sad. It was like, all right, well, it sounds like your dad's a cool guy and you're a pain in the ass.

Oh, well, I mean, yeah, Maybe it is the other way to go through. Yeah. My dad's cool and I'm definitely a pill. So is my sister. Hey, shout out to Memphis. Memphis. She got found last night. I thought that dog was so gone and dead.

I thought that dog had no shot. I know. So whenever I got the call this morning, it woke me up and I saw it and I thought about the people that I had made the biggest deal to, obviously the two of you being on that list. And Kevin just wrote back, holy shit, I for sure thought it was curtains for that dog. I thought. I put curtains in all caps.

I was going to say dead and I wanted to soften it. So thank you for not telling me that. She was missing for how many days? Four. Four days in a different town like where she doesn't know like can't find her way back dead that's the thing is she gotta be in the 0.01 man she wasn't dead but gone you know you ain't getting it back she wasn't missing in a place she'd ever been for a long period of time before so that's when i was like oh she'll she'll show

up at home i was like listen her home is like hundreds of miles away she was at a gas station apparently chilling last night police officer in the town like sitting outside the gas station like the uh the from what i understand the police officer saw her like wandering around a gas station at like 4 30 in the morning she does but she he recognized her from like all the pictures and all that so and she ran away that shit works huh yeah so she ran away i thought it was like a police officer being like well this is someone's dog we got to figure it out not being like oh that's the missing dog from the missing dog like they obviously they put posters around the town and like just between the social media and everything

that her like my ex was doing too but i guess she like ran from the police officer and he saw where she was hiding and he just waited her out until she came out because he was like she's gonna have to come out of there at some point what a nice guy yeah they don't have anything else going on also you're the fucking hero when you bring home a lost dog oh and short of like you know uh stopping like a robbery and like you know drawing your gun and catching the bad guy returning the lost dog and not taking the reward money like i had sent reward money too to like make the pot like bigger like and i got that money back so i was like no no i want him to have it and my ex was like he refuses to take well yeah that i mean i don't know how much how much was it i gave like 500 and there was like a total pot was

it was it was multiple thousands i don't think i'd take that i wouldn't take it but if it was like 50 i would take it yeah you know what i mean it's like low enough i'd be like oh like like a couple thousand i'd rather the i'd rather the value of being the hero who doesn't take it but like tens of thousands i'd be like yes and i should well i also i was also like if this was still like if i was still together with my ex and like we were still sharing the dog like we used to i was gonna give way more than that yeah way more but i was like i can't i mean yeah just like be the asshole that's like hey i live in new york city i have a sweet job you want all my money like i don't want to do that. But he didn't take the money.

Shout out Memphis, though. I don't know if he could, to be honest, right? Yeah, no, I know, but I really wanted him to have it. I was like an eight-year-old kid. They all get excited. Like any kid, I guess. They get all excited, and they wear themselves out, and then they pass back out. That happened to me this morning.

I woke up, and I saw the phone call and the text message, and I started texting all of you guys, and then I just passed back out on the couch. I wore back out. That happened to me this morning. I woke up and I saw the phone call and the text message and I started texting all of you guys and then I just passed back out on the couch. I wore myself out. Well, you didn't text me last night back whenever I asked you a question. I wasn't going to triple text you. It was midnight. What the fuck?

Like I said, there was a list of people that got the hey Memphis is found before I just passed out on my couch. What time did you find out? 6.30. PM? AM. It happened overnight. I definitely should have been on the text list.

This is some bullshit. You didn't answer me last night. I wasn't going to triple. I didn't answer you at midnight so I can't get a text at 6.30 in the morning. What the fuck? Kevin was actually one of the first ones other than my family because I know he was going to be awake. Yeah.

And then. No, I didn't wake up. I was going to say, you wouldn't see it until like 12. No till like 12 you know yeah i was still texting people i knew weren't awake like john definitely wasn't awake he got you're just rubbing it in now that's kind of fucked up don't ignore my text messages then if you want i can't believe you've been that ashamed about this i mean if you want the news i mean you're a big time like like when you wouldn't wish hank frankie burrell you happy birthday because he didn't wish it to you like For sure. I feel like this jives with how you would handle it. No, because, like, her last text message was like, hey, I'm like, what's up?

Like, leaving the bar. Like, what are you doing? Oh, just getting dinner. That's not what I said. You said you were leaving the bar. I don't think so. You definitely didn't. I'm going to go back and look.

You also did the talking into the phone. Yeah, I did. Even though it was a text message. Yeah, that's true. It's a good point. Idiot. It's a good point, Kevin. What a moron you are. No, actually. So the a text message. Yeah, that's true. Idiot. It's a good point, Kevin. What a moron you are.

So the dog is back. Actually, that's just not true. What? You asked what I was doing. I told you what I was doing and it was at 1054. Oh.

Well, I mean, I went to sleep early last night. You asked me a question. I'm trying to get a hold of my life, Kevin. Are you? Yeah. What does that mean?

Oh, because off season and shit? Yeah, I guess. Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. He's trying to go to a better area. I'm going to go to the gym today. You are? I'm going to go. I don't think I have anything this afternoon.

Fuck you. Fidel Burgess gave me a skeptical look. You could have just done the Harlem Shake with us and worked out. Yeah, was it an exercise? Oh, I had Ellie on my shoulders and was doing squats. They were shallow squats, but yes. Doesn't Casey look like she's been married for five years and she lives in Aspen?

Oh yeah, she's got the cozy shirt on, the glasses on. I can't wear eye makeup right now. You look like a bougie trophy wife. Your kids are like seven years old and they're gold medal winning skiers.

I'll take it. You have Xanax and martinis for brunch. Your husband is probably cheating, but you're fucking the ski instructor so it doesn't matter. White wine just all the time. That's that whole aesthetic. I can't wear eye makeup right now because I'm having eye problems. It's been a week.

You've had yourself a week. I had makeup on yesterday for the college football show and the whole day I just wanted to claw my eye out. I was like, well, we're not wearing eye makeup for the rest of the day, so I guess I'm just going to wear these fake ass glasses. It's a good look for you though. Can't tell anything from your eye. Can you and I take them off?

A lot of medicine too. A lot of medicine. You ever see that porno with the bartender where they pay her to suck their dicks in the bathroom and then one of them accidentally comes in her eye and it gets all red. That's what it looks like. Are you talking about like a,

like a, like one of those, like, like a scripted porno or like a real, I've definitely seen like a, like a real scenario, but it's not supposed to be. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's like, you guys gotta be quick.

But anyway, yeah, it does look like coming? Yeah. She's like, well, you guys got to be quick. But anyway, yeah. It does look like coming right. Yeah. I'll get fired. I won't get fired. That girl. She's just like, whatever. I have nothing to say.

They found my dog. They found my dog. I don't give a fuck about that. And the people that needed to know knew. Jared, what do you think about T.I.'s comments? I feel like you would do this like a weirdo. What did he say? He said he goes to the gynecologist with his daughter every year to make sure her hymen's intact.

And she's 18. She's 18. What? Yeah. Crazy. Wait, what's a hymen? Like the... The cherry?

Yeah. Yeah. To make sure that she's not a virgin. I mean, she is a virgin. Yeah, but the whole thing, like we were saying before you got in here, like that can be broken a million different ways. Also, like the whole thing is that you just shouldn't do this right right but also you shouldn't do this and he came out he was like oh she don't ride no bikes she don't ride no horses like she definitely like if it's broken she's not a virgin anymore large said that she's probably just one of these girls

who does all anal yeah yeah dad i still love it large really say that yeah oh my god i mean i love that large can say whatever the fuck he wants. He's definitely pushing her in that direction. Oh, yeah. She's 18 already, though. It's like... That's crazy. The worst thing you can do. I mean, you are...

You're not encouraging her, but you are molding her to become one day just this sexual deviant. I would think that... I think all of the other ancillary sex acts are worse than sex. Minus the fact that like you can get pregnant. I know. But like you want your daughter like blowing a guy. Yeah.

That's what I'm saying. Your daughter doing some of the other stuff. That's why we had this conversation last year. Normal old protected sex than some of the other shit. Yeah. But the problem is I'm assuming that he's just like so psychotic that it's like, I don't want her getting pregnant. I don't want that. It's like nobody wants their like, not that anybody's like, I don't want her getting pregnant. I don't want that.

It's like, nobody wants, they're like, not that anybody's like, yeah, please 15 year olds like go get pregnant. But I'm sure it's like the old school, like you think that way.

Cause it's 2019. But a lot of people are like, no, like you're not a virgin. If you have that kind of sex, it's just, it's an old school way of thinking. I'd say what a fucking psychotic it's disgusting

like that especially the dog the fact that the doctor is still allowing it to happen like john brought that up that's so true i wonder if like this is real or if he just says i you can't the fact he's coming out and having to apologize for it and stuff too like apologize i'm just saying i wonder if he actually you know it's like i said when like i chain her to the radiator it's like you don't actually do that like does he does he actually go to the doctor with her? I wouldn't chain my daughter to the radiator, so to speak, but I might do like, I don't know, ground her until she's 30. And it's like, okay, well, if I just, if I keep you home the entire time, then you don't have any skills. So it's not like you're going to like go out and get a job or something.

So you're dependent on me. So you stay in the house. And then when you're 30, I'll let you go. I think... They had to take the episode down. What episode? It was a podcast? This is going to be a big one. This is going to be bad for him.

It said, T.I.'s comments have been so wildly been seen as offensive and misogynistic that the two people who did the podcast made the decision to take down that episode of their podcast like no shit what show is it nadia and nazanin who the fuck is that probably just a couple podcast hosts in the ladies like us is the podcast have you ever interviewed ti before nope don't think that's the last thing i've even heard of ti although i mean my brain is just entourage all the time the last last thing I've even heard or seen him do anything is his cameo in the movie.

He's hosting that new show I was talking about a few weeks ago, Rhythm and Flow, which is a rap version of American Idol of The Voice. Oh, that's right. So he was doing that. I feel like he's kind of one of those moguls, but bootleg moguls. I feel like he tries to do not just rap.

He wants to be Damon John, but he's not, you know, like, like Puffy and them do like liquor and clothes and all this other shit. I think he, they tried to do that like down South, but I don't think it worked. Yeah.

I don't know. I don't know where he stands right now, but I know that he ain't going to, he's not in good standing with like the rest of the world right now. Ironically, ironically in the entourage movie, he's in the gynecologist waiting room. No cameo with his wife. Cause he thinks, he thinks she's pregnant again. And he's movie, he's in the gynecologist waiting room. No. In that cameo with his wife.

Because he thinks she's pregnant again. And he's like, kick me in my nuts. I need a vasectomy. That was a good TI. Good impression there. I got to get a vasectomy. What? What?

You want to do it? Let's do it. Me, you, and Clem? Let's snip our fucking whatever the fuck it is. Why do you want to do that? I thought you wanted kids. I don't want to. I do. Well, you know that you can't. I'm going to is. Why do you want to do that? I thought you wanted kids. I do.

Well, you know that you can't. I'm going to adopt. I told you. I'm going to adopt a young boy from the Dominican Republic. I will keep him in the shed outside in the backyard for a little bit because if you're going to have You can't say that. Why? It's problematic putting a kid in a shed. No, it's not. He's my son. We're training him

to become a professional baseball player, so he needs to face the adversity. So he's going to face the adversity, and he's going to overcome, and he's going to become a Hall of Fame. Just hit him like a thousand ground balls a day. Yes, ground balls, line drives. Did you see that video that went viral the other day of the little three-year-old?

That swing was perfect. That's going to be my kid. You thought it was going to be someone else's kid. Well, I mean, if you adopt. It's not blood, but I feel like family is a concept. Family is a state of mind.

Oh, okay. I gotcha. I feel that. If you could have your kid, it would be a baseball player? That's the one thing you'd want him to be? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I feel like I already know. It's not even like a what if or a maybe. My first kid

is going to be a girl. So I've just already accepted that. And the karma is going to be beautiful. No. No. She's going to come home crying. You're going to have such a fucking slut for a daughter. Not even just that. She's going to come home crying you're gonna have such a fucking slut for a daughter

not even just that like she's gonna come home crying and be like this boy was so mean to me today and he took back his dragon necklace from me and he was so mean I'll be the best dad to a girl that's just not true yes I would I would be a great dad you can read the book I just ordered Strong Fathers Strong Daughters

we'll figure this out together Rocket I would be a great dad. You can read the book I just ordered, Strong Fathers, Strong Daughters. We'll figure this out together, Rocket. I would be a great dad. But to a boy, I'd be like, listen, if you don't live up to the Rocket name, I'm kind of like, Keegan will be fine. Don't worry about it. Let's worry about Shay.

You talk about curtains. Big time curtains. He'll be good. I don't need to worry about him. Everybody's freaking out about this happening at school, what's going on with the parents at home. I'm like, he won't be fine. Like, Shay, we gotta worry about him.

My daughter will be my princess, but my son, I will treat like he's on the roster. Your son will fucking hate you. You can get cut. You can get cut any day. We'll trade you to your fucking aunt and uncle. You might have the red tag in your locker. Yeah. Oh yeah. Guess what?

Sorry. You just got designated for assignment. We're fucking optioning you to Kevin Clancy's house. See ya. Have fun with uncle Kevin. You are going to go in uncle Kevin's would probably be pretty fun. I was going to say that kid ain't coming back. You're like,

fuck you. Rocket. Daddy. Rocket. I'm hanging out with uncle Kevin. When you're growing up, you got donuts and soda. If you have cool aunts and uncles, fuck you, Rocket. Daddy Rocket. I'm hanging out with Uncle Kevin. You've got donuts and soda and shit. If you have cool aunts and uncles when you're growing up, there is nothing better.

That's how you hate your parents. Why aren't you like them? And then their kids like your parents better. It's just a vicious cycle. You might have a whole slew of daughters. I hope so. No, I feel like whole slew of daughters. I hope so. No.

I hope so. No, I feel like I'll just have one. I actually, when we go to the break in a little bit, I'm going to look up, I wrote a blog, like Lessons for My Unborn Son, which the title was something like, Lessons for My Unborn Son, Which Will Never Happen Because God Is Going to Curse Me With Only Daughters. Yeah. That was like the title of my and i had a handful of of lessons uh but for the boys that i didn't think i was gonna have but i did end up having

keegan they were things along the lines of like you have to go to a big time like sports program school don't make the same mistake i did you have to and i don't remember a lot of the other ones um well girls can do that too kevin shut up casey like yeah you knew i mean you knew crazy you knew that i was gonna say that as soon as you said it but you know it's not a it's not every dad's dream to send their daughter to like you know arizona gamma whatever in arizona state or some shit oh yeah i know well my sister and i were in sorority so that worked out nicely we're not as we're not yeah you could have been yeah i feel like i hate my sister wasnity little sister, though, so it's kind of the same thing. What the fuck does that mean?

So my dad was a charter member of Sigma Chi at A&M, so there's some sort of- Just charter member, meaning the first ones ever? The first ever, yeah. And so then Sigma Chi has the little sisters who help plan their events and stuff, but they don't have to be attached to a sorority. My sister was one of those. So your sister was a sorority girl? No, because they don't have to be attached to a sorority. My sister was one of those. So your sister was a sorority girl?

No, because they don't have to rush or anything. I mean, she was going to all the parties. But she was like, it was kind of the best of both worlds for her because she's like, I don't want to do rush. I don't want to live in the house. I don't want to have to kiss everybody's ass. I just want to fuck the boys. I just want to go to these formals

and go to the woo-wows and stuff. Just want to dress slutty and bang the guys. But she didn't, though. She did have a serious boyfriend who was in a fraternity at TCU the whole time. TCU stinks. Do you know what TCU is?

Yeah, I fucking know what TCU is, Casey. I know they're fucking cheerleaders, too, Casey. They have a very good baseball team too, Jared. Yeah, that's fucking Durbin Feldman, a.k.a. Dalton Furbush for this draft. He was the number one collegiate closer in the draft and the Red Sox took him. Let's hit our break. When we come back. What a wild ride that was.

We got a call online about adopting a pro athlete. So maybe somebody actually has done that before. And we'll take some more calls. We'll keep it rolling here. It's Karabas Clancy and Casey Smith on CCK. Two cups, toast up with the game. From food stoppers to a whole nother domain. Out the bottle, yeah. I'm a living proof. Ain't compromising.

A million on the coop. Draw houses. Looking like Peru. Graduated. I was overdue. Pink money. I can barely move. Ask about me.

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Whether you're hanging out on the couch or you're going to the office, either way, you're going to look good and feel good. Go to public rec. That's public R E C.com slash KFC for 10% off to chop down my tree. But he's just playing the role of someone that could do that. Like he couldn't actually do that. I could chop down a tree for sure. No, you couldn't. Yes, he could.

No, you can't. Come on. What are you nuts? How many, how many wax do you think it would take? Oh, a lot of wax. Yeah. A lot of wax. I'd whack the hell out of that tree, but'd get it down hours for sure okay yeah we're talking

about a little birch oh birch i'll take i'll tackle a bird we're talking about like like roughly like the size of like a hug oh yeah that's gonna take a long good long time like how long are we talking weekend oh you could do it on a weekend so you can't even do it today yeah no i don't think so i mean that's a lot that's a lot of whacking A big hug with just an axe? Just an axe I mean, I couldn't even get through a neck in one swing How do you know that?

Just an intermediate guess You told me in the office the other day That you could just chop my neck off with one swing Or my head off You have a bird neck That's true Shut up, bird! It was perfect that I was wearing that

fucking bird mask in the Harlem Shake video yesterday. That was just like accidental too, right? No, I picked it out. Oh, okay. That was just a beautiful serendipitous happenstance. No, I picked it out. This has never felt like more like a Friday in my life. Just the entire mood in the offices could not be

more Friday. There's actually, what is there? There's a beer pong table set up over there? There's a beer pong in the offices could not be more friday there's actually what is there like a there's a beer pong table set up over there's a beer pong in the lobby which is i mean you where that comes from sports that's it the entrance lobby the first thing you see is a beer pong table a big cheeseburger or a big bacon egg and cheese and then a beer pong i won't name the company uh but there was one company that i interviewed at before i was full time at barstool sports and uh when i went in there they had like a beer pong table in their like cafeteria area and it just came off as like come on guys like we're cool too like i almost like don't want that to be here yeah i agree yeah i agree well somebody dropped it off because i know

when ria fran and i went to do the group chat, it was not there. And when we came back, Rhea was playing on it. And Ebony said some guy just came and dropped it off. So it's not like a barstool thing. Is it like his product or is it just like a fan? I think it's his product. So obviously it's a one-person beer pong table, which I think is strange. That's weird.

You shouldn't have led that with obviously because they can't see it. It's not obvious. No one's ever heard of a one-person beer pong table. Okay, it's a one-person beer pong table. The netting, actually, I am kind of a fan of the netting, because it keeps the ball from flying over, obviously, onto the floor. But my question is,

is why you would ever be playing one-person beer pong at like a tailgate or something? If you're practicing beer pong so that you could be good at it at a party, you're a loser. You're a loser, but also there are a lot of people. I bet there's a good market for that game. I would too.

So a couple of frat boys in a hotel room, in the dorm room, who just want to wow the ladies at the next Sigma Chi party. But why would you ever, like everyone owns a table in some form or fashion. But that has the netting. There's also like something underneath it.

I didn't really take a good look at it, but I do know there's like beer pong arcade games that are like that. And like, obviously, you know, you get the point. So that makes sense to me because it's a one person game because then other people can play with you. I'm not really sure the point of this, but it's in the lobby and people are playing on it. You know what I enjoyed?

I went to San Diego. I played like the oversized beer pong with like the, the lobby and people are playing on it. You know what I enjoyed? I went to San Diego. I played the oversized beer pong with the solo cups for buckets. I enjoyed myself. You're just launching massive balls across... How far away

were they for you? From here to the TV probably. I know that's bad radio, but... 15 feet. Yeah. 15 feet. Was it too bad? No. What was it that we played in the office last year? Oh, Big Flip Cup. Yeah. That was a disaster.

Yeah, I spilled it all over myself. Me too. Who can dump the beer on their chest faster? Do you feel old playing beer pong now? No. No, because if I did it regularly, if it was a weekend thing, yes. I guess maybe, I feel, I will say this, and this might be just a fancy word for old. I feel nostalgic when I play beer pong now. Yeah, it's like, oh, those were the days.

Yeah, so that's probably just old. Yeah. But you don't feel like. But a nice old, not a creepy old. Right. No, I feel old. You do? Yeah.

I would feel old if I was playing with 18-year-olds. I probably play beer pong once a year on a ski trip. It's like with people my age. Yeah, with my friends in my house. I think it's different with who you're playing with. Well, I mean, I'm not usually hanging out at bars when I'm 22-year-old. At a bar, yeah. But if you were to go on the Natty Tour,

and you're just like, oh, you got invited to this college party, but it's like, well, Marty's there, so it's like Marty's kind of just out of college, so that's my gateway to get in, and then now you're a 31-year-old playing beer pong at a frat house, and it's like, well, this is bad. If I'm playing beer pong at a frat house, yes, I assure you I feel that. I also just wouldn't

go to the frat house to play beer pong. But if everyone is going, then what are you going to do? I mean, I don't know. Probably go. Probably go. That's what it is. How often are we going to frat parties here? I don't know. I'd probably go. I'd probably go. That's what it is. But how often are we going to frat parties here? I mean, it happens from time to time. I mean, like, wasn't Big Evan Marty just out one,

like, very recently? They were at Champs. What's that? The big Penn State bar. Big Barstool bar. It looked like a fucking house party. We actually had a question kind of similar to this on KFST Radio this week,

where it was someone was at a concert, a Tyler Childers concert tyler childers childress what's his name the country star childress childress tyler childers concert and uh they had to shush the people in front of them because they were talking it wasn't like they weren't being part of the show they weren't cheering but they were like they were just having a conversation like guys we're trying to listen to music can you shut up and they said that was the first time where they were like having a conversation. I was like, guys, we're trying to listen to music. Can you shut up? And they said, that was the first time where they were like, Oh shit, I feel really old. What was your,

did you, have you had one where you're like, wait, the old people were shushing. They were, they were 20. The caller was 29, him and his girlfriend.

And they were shushing people who I've been, couldn't have been much younger than them probably. But they were just, they were, they were not uneasy with what was happening. So they described, they said, stop it.

What have you ever had something where you're like, I an old person but this has to stop uh not that i can think of i mean we're talking about frat houses like when we were at penn state for the college football show this year the tvs and the bus weren't working and we were obviously all trying to watch games and one of the like the stage managers came out and they're like hey like there's a room in the frat house that you guys can like all go in and watch games if you want and immediately we were all like no i was like that's an old person thing to do because if this was like four or five years ago be like yeah like we'll go and have some beers watching games and me i'm not that uh not that anti-feeling old i'd go into a frat house and watch a football game if i wanted to watch the game well we just went to a bar instead and just watch it by

ourselves i mean that's that's fine but that was like my first, like, I was like, if there was no other option, I'd go, I'll go watch a game. It was just like, no, I think we'd rather just go be by ourselves somewhere. And that is not something I would have done like five years ago. We had our, we went on for a long time, but it was, it was basically like Kevin was talking about his house and how, like if someone was on his lawn, he'd be like, get the hell off my lawn.

Yeah. I probably feel the same way. Yeah. Especially if you like actually take care of your lawn yeah i totally get get off my lawn i've i've had um i've had my i've i've had i've complained enough about neighbors playing music to my roommate that my roommate wrote a note so i never wrote a note but i've been like these motherfuckers um we i forget what else we said we went on for a long time i'm surprised neither of you have anything no i i told kevin the story on radio the other day i think we were actually talking about this specific thing the lawn thing i wrote a note to the house behind me because their kids were shooting airsoft pellets into my pool and that'll like massively fuck up the pipes and

the pumps and instead of just being a normal person like going over and knocking on the door i went like gathered them up put them in an envelope and like wrote a note like stop shooting these in my fucking backyard the next day double the amount of airsoft pellets in my backyard okay boomer yeah so i was like well the note never gonna do that again that obviously didn't work and i'm old i'm mad at like kids just having fun in their backyard you know what old thing my dad used to do all the time and he particularly used to do it at fenway which used to embarrass the hell out of me is like when people were swearing at baseball games like i got my kid over here come on he wouldn't like yeah your dad would do that with me yeah i mean obviously like i

know your dad now. Like, I can't picture him being that way. Like, when I was, like, seven, me and my dad have matured in different – well, I haven't really matured. But I guess my dad's – the water has found its level with my dad where he's come down to me. Like, my dad used to be way more mature than he is now. Really? Yeah. Oh, yeah.

I love partying with your dad. Yeah, he's a blast. But he used to be like, hey, don't be screaming like, fuck you. Fuck you, Fat Man Clemens. My kid's right here. But that was incredibly uncomfortable for me. Actually, you just mentioned it. I don't know what OK Boomer is.

I see it on Twitter all the time. I don't know what the fuck that is. I don't know where that came from. You just really need to stay up on the lingo. I can't explain it to you. What is it? Baby boomers are the generation... Our parents are baby boomers.

You're basically just saying go fuck yourself to the people that hate millennials? Exactly. They've written thousands and thousands of articles about how millennials ruined this, millennials ruined that. Now millennials are just going, okay, boomer. I'll tell you what, boomers are not happy. They're not. It's like a super big insult on Twitter.

If somebody's having a normal sports argument back and forth and all of a sudden they get hit with an okay Boomer, you might as well have just thrown dynamite at their house. They call it ageist. They say it's the N word for older people. And by they, I mean certain factions of people.

But yeah, boomers are not thrilled about being a boomer wow all right so now i'll have to put that into the lexicon yeah how did you phrase the question like a moment that you felt old a moment that you realized like oh i've turned the corner and i've become the guy i used to hate i've become the guy where yep yes almost a year ago the night before Thanksgiving the townie night it used to be you'd go out and you'd

hang out with kids from your class maybe like a couple of classes beneath you a few classes above you I went last year there was one person from my class one person from any class above me and pretty i would say in terms of like percentage wise 80 i did not go to high school with i was

just totally out of the class i didn't like freshman when you were a senior yeah yeah it was about 80 percent like that's a high number yeah Jared. Yeah. So I took a look around, and I was like, I had my Undertaker moment where I was just, you lose at WrestleMania, you take a look at the fans one last time, you leave your boots in the middle of the ring, you kiss your wife, and then you walk up the ramp to sad music. That was my Thanksgiving. Did he leave his boots in the ring?

Yeah. That is unbelievable. He took his gloves off and his jacket and his hat, and he left them in the middle of the ring, and then he walked out. What fantastic showmanship. Yeah. That is gorgeous. That's how I felt.

I was like, wow. You don't know when to walk away, but Kowloon will tell you when it's time to walk away. It's time to hang it up. Yeah. I mean, I'm still going to go, but I feel like... You are? I'm going to go, but I feel like You are? I'm going to go for dinner and then

leave before all the hooligans get there to drink their alcohols. I'm going to go there at like 7, have a nice dinner, maybe go with a couple of my friends. Glass of wine. A couple of Mai Tais. They have to get home to their

families, their kids that they've created, and the houses that they've bought, and I'm going to go back to my parents and then get back. The Red Sox wallpapered room. Yeah, my childhood bedroom. Red Sox fans parking only. Pretty much. I like two teams, the Red Sox and whoever's beating the Yankees. I have, there's definitely like a, which is now very controversial.

A Yakiway street sign is in there. Yeah, you can't do that. Very problematic now. Got to take that down. Can't have that representing anything. No, it's okay. If you just don't put like pictures out on the internet or anything. I mean, they're on the internet.

They're there. Oh, they're out there. Of your Yakiway? Of my bedroom? Yeah. That video. I don't think that's actually controversial to have no i think i'm sure i think it was it was i don't think people would call you like i don't think it's like hang on pan to the left of that yaki way sign is that

a hood clan hood clan hood i see yeah i mean i feel like if you were to if you were to willingly have that up now it could be taken as like an anti change the name stance like no we want Yaki's name up there it's like nah I just I bought it like in like 2003 and it's just been up there and I'm lazy yeah it's just really high up there was it Ortiz?

they changed it back to Jersey Street oh did they? did they name one street Ortiz? it's the bridge but then they also have David Ortiz Way or Lane or something. It's that side road that runs next to Beer Works. Oh, okay. Yeah. The small road, yeah.

The first time I ever really felt old, and I wasn't even that old. I was just like, I don't know, probably 25 and my ex-boyfriend had a motorcycle and in college, like anybody had a motorcycle, I loved it. I was like, I don't know, probably 25. And my ex-boyfriend had a motorcycle. And in college, like anybody had a motorcycle? I like loved it. I was like, I didn't think twice about it.

You were such a hussy. True facts. I got on the back of the motorcycle and was like, fuck this. Like, I don't like this anymore. And I was like, oh, this is me turning into my mom. Because in college, I didn't think, I didn't, I was like, I don't even want to wear a helmet. Obviously, I always did. But after that, I was like, I can't do this.

This is going too fast. I don't like it. We're going to die. And I was like, I don't even want to wear a helmet. Obviously, I always did. But after that, I was like, I can't do this. This is going too fast. I don't like it. We're going to die. And I was like, fuck, I'm getting old. Yeah, I've done that with like skiing where I used to just fucking barrel down the mountain and just be like, tuck the poles back, crouch position straight. And now I'm like, I'm going to take 45 minutes on this. I'm going to go really slow.

I do that with rollercoasters. I don't go on rollercoasters anymore. Oh, see, I love rollercoasters. You don't go on rollercoasters? I mean, I haven't had the opportunity. I can't imagine the last time I was in an amusement park. The idea of roller coasters. We went to Epcot.

What did we do? We took a boat ride. Yeah, we went on... I don't remember. It was in Mexico. It was a Mexican version of... What's the fucking famous water ride? I don't know. Whatever. It was a Mexican thing.

It was amazing. It was a splash mountain? No, no, no, no. It was a very lazy river. But we were in like a boat. Moving incredibly slowly. It was so much fun. And we were drunk as shit.

That helps. That really spices everything up. When's the last time you did a townie night i don't really have a townie night because i didn't go to school in my town i know but like for like fall river there's got to be a no no there definitely is like i'll um i don't know i don't know where it is um but there is one i'll go to like the belmont club which is like uh i'll go there with like my brother it's a quiet little bar. I'll go there with a brother and my sister or a brother and two friends. I don't really keep in touch that much with people from my hometown. Yeah, same.

I don't either. So I don't know. But I'll go into Newport and I'll go to like, but I don't even do time and night there either. It's just like, I'll go to a quiet bar and have a beer with a couple of friends. That's pretty much what I do everywhere in my entire life. I go to a bar with the only people I like and I only talk to the people I like I don't want people bumping around me

it makes me feel good you know we've come a long way John you used to only hang out with me because you were paid to yeah I'd still prefer it that way I'd like to get paid like last night at a bar that would have been great I guess technically we do

I guess technically I'm still paid to hang out with you. Why is that? I'm not paid by the hour. I'm paid salary. That's true. Oh, fuck you. You're paid when you win your bets like we did last night. I did.

Shout out the Raiders. I lost the under, and I guess the under had worse odds, so I did end up losing a little bit more. Are you keeping track of how many units you're up or down overall since you started? No. But I know two weeks I've get i know what two weeks i've been paid and two weeks i've had to pay my bookie okay so it's like i don't know i figure the same thing so you're kind of breaking even but unless you're like super down and like barely up no no i'm okay it hasn't it hasn't affected my bottom excuse me i just had a spicy chicken

sandwich um it hasn't affected my bottom line. It hasn't. I'm like proud of myself for being a month in. Like, it's not a problem yet. You're not just like betting on WNBA games or like, what did Marty bet on the other day? Like college volleyball or something? Like that is dark. That is so dark. He's a wild man.

I think he was betting on like Hawaiian volleyball. Something that he should not be betting on. Well, it's huge in Hawaii. Volleyball? I don't think it's beach volleyball. It's gym volleyball. Oh, then I take that back. Yeah, beach volleyball, sure.

Big time. Yeah. What's the one thing that you're least proud that you've gambled on? Nothing. I've only gambled on football. So you haven't gone down that road yet? I haven't gambled on baseball Maybe I have in my past

You were betting on the World Series games? Oh right yeah I forgot baseball was on Jesus Christ it's so cold You were definitely betting on the Astros Yankees series Because we lost our streak Because you were cheering in a bar We both were for the Yankees at one point

It was like a shameful moment We don't want the fucking Yankees to win, but we bet on the Yankees. Yeah, it was when LeMahieu. LeMahieu tied it up. I was like, stand it up. Let's go! That's a terrible thing to admit. Oh, he tweeted about it immediately.

Yeah, Casey was like, it's going to make Boston people mad. Fucking bet on the game. We haven't to do. Yeah. I feel like that's one of those rules. All you can't, you can't bet against your Boston teams. And I feel like you can't bet for the Yankees.

I feel like you can bet for the Yankees, but not in the playoffs. I mean, I don't have any, it's all, it's separate. That's what I, I've been saying.

It's completely separate. People get mad at me when I tweet about betting on Texas football. And they're like, you're not a real Aggie. It's like, fuck you. Betting on Texas and wanting to win money is completely separate than my fandom. Yeah. I genuinely thought that team, I didn't hope they would win. If it was up to me, I would have chosen, I would have bet on the Astros because I thought

the Astros were going to win. Just didn't think they were going to win that game. Yeah. It has nothing to do with fandom. It has everything to do with just making money. But it is. When your team is actually playing in it, the only hockey game I bet on was I bet against the Bruins

probably like fifth game of the season. They were playing against Colorado, yeah. And I ended up winning the bet, but I was still betting. I was still rooting for the Bruins. I didn't care that I was winning my bet. I was like, come on, let's go fucking pasta. Bury this title.

That's just so weird. I haven't done that again since, and I don't was like, come on, let's go fucking pasta. That's just so weird. I haven't done that again since. I've never bet against A&M. I've bet on A&M. But then again, if you bet against them, it's kind of a win-win. Because if they win, you're happy as a fan. If they lose, you win money.

It's a fair argument, I think. I don't think it works out well. Betting usually doesn't, John. That's true. It's a fair argument, I think. I don't think it works out well for most people. Betting usually doesn't, John. That's true. It's true. That night, the game that we're talking about was the first night that I was a miserable person to be around because I was losing all my bets. I felt myself being like— That's what you think, huh?

First night? Yeah, well, you keep hanging out with me, so it can't be that bad. But I felt that that was the only time I've really been like, I don't even want to be in public because I'm losing every single thing I have. I should be at home. And I was like, please don't turn into Dave. Don't turn into Dan where they're just miserable people. Don't do this to yourself. Have another glass of wine and shut the fuck up.

I mean, we can't afford to be miserable like them. What's that? No one out here can afford to be as miserable as them. That's true. I don't think they can afford to do it, to be honest. No. No. Hence the misery.

Yes. Yeah, that would make a lot of sense, especially if Dave is down as much as he's reported that he has been down. I mean, that's bullet in the brain worthy. They did say, John, that if you're not a real gambler, if at Thanksgiving you're enjoying yourself. They're like, you should be taking in so much water by that holiday

that you're betting all the NBA games on Wednesday night. You're betting all the college basketball tournaments. And Dave said something along the lines of it was on the college football show. He was like, Dave, why aren't you hungry? He's like, because I'm losing my fucking ass. Leave me alone. And I was like, I can't ever get to that point. I can't. Yeah, I don't have a desire to. We'll see what what happens i don't have the itch to get into gambling it's it's fun i mean

i enjoy it it's like i'm not i'm not like you're a fucking pussy if you don't gamble but i know it's it's fun to throw a couple shackles on a game i mean i feel like i was like i wouldn't give a fuck about raiders chargers but like last night i had a healthy investment not a healthy investment a healthy interest because of an investment in the game and it was fun. It also just makes us be at the bar more. Which also is great and also is really losing money. Yeah.

What are you drinking money? It doesn't count. It's like whenever you're playing blackjack. I don't feel like you're really losing money because you're having a good time doing it. Yeah, you're paying for a good time. And you get your free drinks. That's how hookers make their living. Gambling's just a... A form of prostitution? Slutty hooker.

She'll fuck absolutely anybody. It doesn't matter. I feel like I would be in a decent position to pick up gambling because I don't... You work at Barstool Sports? That. And I just don't spend money on anything else besides food. Like, my hobbies are... You spend money on anything else besides food. Like my hobbies are

spend money on that new bomber jacket. Yeah, it's sharp. I think I look pretty good. Thanks. He really wanted that validation from you. You could tell. I told you. I was saying this to Kevin the other day on KC Radio

that I always gas guys up in the office. I know you do. Because we were talking about the – when you and I were on the Memphis walk and the guy we saw, these two homeless – this homeless guy, like a borderline homeless guy, like hollering at two female doctors. And I was like, dude, what makes you fucking think that you have a shot with these two women of medicine, these two learned doctors? You're selling neckties outside of Madison Square Garden. And me and Kevin were then saying that, you know, but I would take it. If you wanted to show some of that love my way, Mr. Necktie Guy.

Right. Oh, this was the homeless person talk? Yeah. Like the one outside of my apartment. That's why people are saying, I realize now you guys are talking about that on KFC radio. Yes. Makes more sense. I have three homeless people outside of my building every

single day and they they gas me out at casey every day every day well unless i look like shit which is some days then they don't and that's like when john and i were on the walk he was like well does that make you feel worse i was like yeah if i walk by and they don't say shit i know i look like shit that thing but i feel like you're also pretty self-aware like you know the days where you're just like i'm looking kind of rough oh absolutely i also like choose to look rough sometimes and that also makes their compliments genuine versus like oh they're just saying this to everyone yeah well the the real twist in it is that they sit between my building and where i go to the gym and right now obviously it's too cold i can't do it but every day during the summer i

was just walking out in like yoga pants and a sports bra because I'm just going across the street to go to the gym if you get two compliments in a day it's a good day from the homeless people and John was saying that he was upset he doesn't have the homeless people hollering at him yeah and that's why I come in his office every day I'll be like my first thing I say is

what's up king to my man spider and you know you can't anymore right what he doesn't he doesn't sit there spiders moving seats they moved him to the other side of the building First thing I say is, what's up, King, to my man Spider. And you know you can't anymore, right? What? He doesn't sit there. Spider's moving seats? They moved him to the other side of the building. What? Yeah.

I hate that. I hate that. That's the first thing I do. That gasses me up to then go on and gas up everyone else. Yeah, he's gone from there. He's over on the other side. He's been sequestered. Oh, my God.

That's crazy. It's like a full-scale shake-up zah moved zah moved those are my two gas of kings i know jack mccarthy jack mccarty is now over smiling jack is sitting where's all who's smiling the one that the guy oh the guy the guy guy he's sitting yeah why is this They also moved Grinnell this way too. It's like they're trying to separate the producers and the people that deal with the content. Yeah, but Spider needs to be there just solely for Larry. And Spider is like the gatekeeper over there.

That's the first guy I want to see when I walk in and the last guy I want to see when I walk out. Like I always get like a goodbye and a hello from Spider every day. Yeah, Spider's my dude right there. That's very unfortunate. I think we should sign up. I'm not a goodbye and a hello from Spider every day. That's very unfortunate. I'm not a big petition guy, but I feel like we should get a petition. We'll fire one up.

If we get enough signatures for Spider. Let's do that. Who's sitting there now? At Spider's desk. I think it's Jack McCarthy and maybe Brandon Newman is over there. They're moving a lot of people. TJ, I thought you were about to point yourself and I was like, whoa, this is getting awkward now. You had the hand up and it was like about to go to your face.

Oh, shit. Well, it's going to become one of those things. It's like whoever is sitting at Spider's desk, you have to be like, listen, this is not personal. Yeah, but I'm not going to say hi to you. We have to have Spider here. Yeah. I mean, even on the weekends like spider is literally sitting there every single time i walk into this building yeah that dude

that dude like sleeps there not in the like the joking sense where like like mantis like lives here like spider just sleeps there because he fucking is here 24 7 working spider's got a place to live but he just grinds his dick off here i walked out on sunday after sunday night i think and spider was just like on his couch with his hood up taking a quick nap because then he's gonna have to get dinners for everybody stay through monday night football shut the restaurant down uh sunday night football shut the office down be first thing in the morning to open it up that kid fucking still got that energy to gas me up too though yeah oh he gas he's he gasses everybody up it's it's beautiful he'll be like

just get your hair done today like spider no but thank you as i was walking in here he's like dude where is that hair from you look great today what we should do is if we can't move if we can't move the person out we should just get him like a different desk and have him just sit right in front of where our desks are they Take that, sure. I'll give Spider my desk. We started talking about this today. We're getting dangerously close to the having to share desks.

Oh yeah, of course. Of course that happened. Within months of moving in here. They made enough desks for the total amount of content people that already worked at Barstool Sports. And now we're all just going to have to double up like we used to at the old office. Yo, Spider's moving? Yeah, Spider's

moved away from that spot. Oh, just like change seats. Yeah, but that's... On the other side of the office, though. He's over there now. He might as well be at the old office. Me? Oh, you don't fucking... I get it. I have a handshake with Spider. It's the first thing I do in the morning. I usually say, like, what's Gucci family, and that's it.

That's good, dude. Yeah, but now you can't say that. We'll survive. Kevin just... Really killed the vibe in here. We'll go to break. Kevin's not signing that petition, I'll tell you that. We're going to create a petition to keep spider.

Whole thing. Fuck this petition. Fuck you, Kevin. We'll head to break, catch you back. Well, I won't catch you back, but Whole thing. Fuck this petition. Fuck you, guys. Fuck you, Kevin. We'll head to break. Catch you back. Well, I won't catch you back, but they will. See you later. I love that you just... We'll be right back. If you want a battle, go eat tonight. Coming from your anus to check my style. Go ahead, but my brown top child.

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Feidelberg out. KFC in. Okay. Upgrade of the century, you know what I mean? Come on, man. Shit. Yeah, I do like your jacket. Thank you.

What the fuck is Brandon Walker doing back there lurking around our show? Michael Myers over there. One day he's going to come in with a machete and he's going to hack someone's business. He looks mad right now. Yeah, he's like leaning all up on this guy's shit. I don't know what he's doing. He's intimidating. Well, now he knows that we're on to him.

I'm telling you. One day. Machete. You think so? He's guaranteed. He's shot up the list. Oh yeah, I'm the first one to go. I don't know. I feel like if you're Laurie Strode,

she makes it till the end. He kind of kills everyone around her. Yeah, see here's the thing. It depends on the day. Me, Kevin. I also could see Dave and Dan bully him. Oh, well that's the problem. A clip came out this morning to preview the show tomorrow.

And it's just Dan saying multiple times. I mean, Brandon Walker just hijacked the show with his stupidity. And Dave's laughing. And I'm like, we really need to end this show. And you can just see Brandon just like sitting there like, how am I stupid? And I was like, yeah, this is the beginning of the end. I think Brandon Walker is super smart and very well versed in sports. Very knowledgeable sports fan. He is.

And he's an electric on-camera talent. Cross me off your kill list, dude. All of the above is true. Make sure you clip that and send it to him. I mean, honestly, if you had to move your like 35 kids from Mississippi to New York. And 35 dogs. You really have. Four.

Four kids, five puppies, goddamn partridge in a pear tree. He's ready to kill somebody. Did you see the pictures of the puppies he was putting up last night yeah I mean they're super cute I just I don't want five of them he had seven of them I want a puppy did you see the pictures of them for free yeah I think so

Cole got one I don't know if he can hear could you hear us please don't kill me I want you to cross me off your kill list oh you're definitely not on the kill me. I want you to cross me off your kill list. Oh, you're definitely not on the kill list. Am I? Yeah, she's like number one.

You're on deck. I was talking to that gentleman over there, one of the producers. He wants a puppy. Oh, we were just talking about the puppies. That's what I was debating with him. We were talking about logistics of him coming to get a puppy from my house. Which puppy is he getting? I don't know.

We haven't gotten that far. Don't give him Rudy. I want Rudy. You're not going to take Rudy though. I've tried to give you a puppy. You can't just say that unless you're going to do it. Everybody at this office. Oh, well save that one for me.

I want to take this one. Okay. Well, when you come and get it. There you go. My landlord, my sister, my mom. Right. I need somebody to get these fucking puppies. Bring me a puppy on Sunday.

Don't just talk about puppies. Bring me a puppy on Sunday. Don't talk about it. Be about it. All right. This was fun. You ain't getting a puppy. I want that puppy.

He says he wants one. Everybody wants one until they have one. But Brandon, if I do get one, I want Rudy. See? I'm on the list. Hey, y'all. You're definitely on the list. I can't get a puppy because I live by myself. Exactly. But that's what people say though. I need like a puppy mom. Okay. Well, your puppy will be alone all the time and can't feed itself and can't walk

itself. Oh, never mind. I can't have a puppy. It's too soon to make the joke I was going to make. I was like, well, hopefully your puppy mom doesn't lose your puppy. It's not too soon. Yeah, the puppy came back. Yeah, Memphis is good. Yeah. Shout out Memphis.

Shout out Memphis. You're sure they didn't just replace it with a similar looking dog, right? No, because she is very hard to replicate. She looks like a coyote. Yeah, I mean, you just say that, but it's also like super hard for a dog to be missing for that many days in a foreign town and come back to life yeah she's there i mean i was getting videos and pictures of her live in the color it's a good double live in the color yeah i mean this is like you can find a couple dogs that have that same no she uh my girlfriends when we first got her called her an indian street dog like that's what

she appears to look like. It's not like a golden retriever. You can just go find the same looking golden retriever. This dog looks like a wild dog. You can find other mutts. She's a greyhound, border collie, catahoula mix. I don't even know what that is. Fucking catahoula.

She has the body of a greyhound. You could take Memphis in a fight, Jared. Um, yeah. We were having a debate today. One of the questions I answered on the internet is what's the fiercest animal you can take in a fight, Jared? Yeah. We were having a debate today. One of the questions I answered on the internet is what's the fiercest animal you can take in a fight? I don't even think I can take a cat in a fight.

What do you mean? To the death, you could. If it's you or this cat's got to walk out alive, you could kill a cat. With my bare hands? You could, though. You could strangle that thing or smash it around by the tail or whatever. But how high could you go, you know?

Like, could you kill, like, a big dog? Could you kill, like, a coyote? Probably not. Could you kill, like, a fox? Kill a coyote. You could kill a coyote? I don't think so. I think coyotes are pretty vicious.

Yeah, they're vicious. I don't think you could even kill a big dog. What are you talking about? You just fucking kick it in the throat. I mean, there's definitely ways. It just has to bite you in the throat i mean there's definitely a way it just has to bite you in the throat so then then it's spiraled into talking about yeah but like it has to get to your throat nfl mascots could you be in a fight now i was drinking with the the uh

morning guys and so you know they're large literally and figuratively. And Willie said he could beat a declawed bear. I was like, Willie, at best, you're a declawed bear. So at best, we're talking about a wash. Straight up. And he's got like the jaws and the teeth of a wild animal. At best, because you're not really a bear, dude. He genuinely was like, I could beat a bear. No.

And then, so we can start going through the list of NFL. at best, because you're not really a bear dude. He genuinely was like, I could beat a bear. No. Not even close. And then, so we start going through the list of NFL. I mean, bears weigh like, what, like fucking eight, like five to 800 pounds or whatever it is. And then he goes, Large, how come you haven't brought up Detroit yet? Ask me about the lions. I was like, you think you could beat

the motherfucking king of the jungle? He was like, yeah, I could beat a lion. No, he couldn't. I'm like, listen, you could beat probably any human on earth. You could probably beat a lot of animals on earth. You can't beat a bear. You can could beat a lion. No, he couldn't. I'm like, listen, you could beat probably any human on earth. You could probably beat a lot of animals on earth. You can't beat a bear. You can't beat a lion.

No. I mean, these things are wild animals that weigh upwards of a ton who are trained to kill. And then he's like, well, you take the claws out. You take the this side. Yeah, okay. Well, if you take away their weapons and their size. Yeah, right. If you make them small, too.

They're not small, man. Yeah. If you make them small, too. They're not small, man. I started to think could I beat a cardinal in a fight? Could I beat a raven? I can't even catch these things. Yeah, that is true. They would have to be aggressive towards you.

Could you beat a cult? Could you beat up a horse? No. They're too big. There's very few mascots. I'm going to, I'll pull up the list.

I still think that it would be tough to beat a really big, scary dog. Definitely. I mean, that's a wolf. You know what I mean? Like that's,

that's, those are very fucking difficult too. I'm talking about like docile, like home dogs. A cowboy. No. I mean, like I got beat up Woody for sure.

But like a real, like actual cowboy? No, they'd shoot you. Like one of these fucking Casey's friends in Texas who call in. They work on the oil rig and shit. No. They're beating you up. Yeah. Could you beat up a 49er, a gold prospector? Yeah, they're probably weak. I don't think so. No, I think they're very strong. They don't see

the sun. They're just trying to make their worth. They're definitely not ordering fucking seamless. Yeah, but they're very strong. They don't see the sun. They don't make their worth. They're definitely not ordering fucking seamless. They're probably also very small because they have to fit into the crevices. I don't know if that's how that works. I don't know if that's how it works.

They climb inside little holes in the mountains to find the gold. What do you think? I think that they're like normal sized people. The best bet you've The gold, is that what you think? What do you think? They're like leprechauns? I think that they're like normal-sized people, Jared. No. The best bet you've got is all of the birds. That's a good take.

Why is it that whenever I have a good take, I'm the only person that has it? If you're mining for gold, you're not a big person. You think large is going down there mining for gold? We said they're just normal, average people. I don't think you understand how mining works. I don't think so either. You think that they're squeezing between holes like mice do? They're going down into mining for gold. We said they're just normal, average people. You understand how mining works. I don't think so either. You think that they're squeezing between holes like mice do? They're going down into tunnels and shit.

You're not in a mine mine. It's more like you're sifting through the river and the dirt and shit like that. You're going into tunnels. You're not in a coal mine. That's what you're thinking of. A coal miner's gotta be tiny. Whatever. Beat up a coal miner. They're not like

fucking big shows not going around looking not like. I think the only bet. Fucking big show is not going around looking for gold. The only bet you got. But you could. Kevin could. I could. The birds. You could maybe beat up a falcon.

If they can't fly. You could maybe beat up a raven. You have to catch them. Once you catch them, you can kill them. A cardinal, a seahawk, a raven. I don't know. A raven seemed like that could be iffy. Again, to the death, a raven will

peck and claw and fuck me up, but I will kill a raven. If I get my hands on it, I will kill that raven. To the death? Viking? No fucking shot. Viking, Bengals, a titan? A titan and a giant? No shot. Nope. Patriot? No shot. You maybe could beat him.

Nowadays? Muskets ain't shit. I could shoot you with a musket. Nowadays, muskets ain't shit. Yeah, but it would kill you. I could shoot you with a musket from here. A bayonet. Musket stink. Isn't that the... I could...

Listen, a patriot is a 5'4 man from the 1700s with bad hygiene and fragile health. He would give you polio. You'd die. Maybe in the long run, but in the fight to the death, I think I could hold my own with a patriot. No. They're just small people. What about a dolphin? No, dolphins will rape you. Yeah. They will fuck you up.

They will rape you to death. Redskin? For sure not. Definitely not. A buccaneer? A pirate? No way. A Texan? Texan? No chance. A panther? No chance. A goddamn gigantic jet? How are you going to beat a jet Can't beat a jet The only way the jets are remaining undefeated

Is if you're fighting a plane And a saint I could beat up a religious freak I'll beat up Casey I'm not a saint that's a catholic thing I think I could take the saints That's really about it Depending on which saint Nah I feel like most saints I could take.

Yeah. I think you could take, like, Saint Nicholas. Yeah, I mean, they were all, like, 5'3". Are they? Saints are small? No, like, back then. I think he thinks everybody is small. Yeah, but back then.

Anything that's old, tiny. Yeah, like, the average height has increased over time. Now, here's what was funny. Willie said he could beat up a lion and a bear, but I asked him about a stealer like an old man from pittsburgh who works in the steel mines and steel fields whatever the fuck is steel factories he said no he's like nah i don't fuck with them like more so than a bear yeah or a lion he's like yeah man i've been to that city i played in that city you don't want

to fuck with those guys declawed bear i mean yeah man declawed bear yeah bottom line is they uh it's tough to meet an n these mascots for a reason. They're not going to be like, you know, it's the Dallas Puss Boys. What's a packer, by the way? Oh, no. What is a packer? Sometimes you like- Cheese packers?

Is that a thing? I don't know. Like a factory? You could beat up cheese for sure. You could beat up some cheese. I'm going to eat that cheese. Yeah. I bought three blocks of mozzarella last night at the fucking grocery store yeah did you know that your kfc radio

co-host says he doesn't really care for cheese i mean he also says he doesn't listen to music and like weird shit like that that's like not true yes you do he said outside of mot sticks because we're on everybody in this office is on a mot stick kick right now but i i crave cheese so we'll be sitting in a bar i'm like i need cheese I need cheese. He's like, it's so fucking weird. I don't crave it, but I love it. I do. But I was like, no, I love cheese. He's like, eh, I could do without it. Like, that's a terrible take. He says it about music, too. He's like, I don't really listen to music

and then he loves to go to musicals. Yeah, we went to one. It was very delightful. Yeah. Yeah, we had a great evening together. You gonna go to another one? I would love to. If he wants to go out. Jerry Broadway? Yeah. I want to expand my catalog. We got Connor on the line right here. He's the asshole who called yesterday about his big dick.

Oh, no. I hope you want some redemption. I don't know what to expect here. What's up, BDC? Okay. To start off, the guy that called in right after me yesterday saying that he could only have sex with his girl in the ass because the dick was so small was absolutely hysterical. Yeah. Good start. Yeah. Give me a minute before you destroy me, Kevin, because you obviously think I'm an asshole. Um,

I wasn't trying to call into like brag about having a big dick. I was just looking for some advice, man. Like certain things are off the table sexually with this girl. Um, and it's just like, what should I do going forward? Well, well,

the answer to that question is you got to fucking titty fuck some butt cheeks. We already gave you your answer, brother. You fuck her butt, just not her butt. You feel me? Titty fuck her butt cheeks. That way you simulate it. You're standing there behind. It doesn't hurt.

Maybe she can play along. Hey, that was the other thing, too. I thought CCK was like a no-kink-shaming radio show. We're not shaming you for kink-shaming. We're shaming you for calling in and being like, I'm blessed with such a big dick. What do I do about it? All right, that's fair enough.

So what you do is you titty-fuck some butt cheeks. Yeah. And then she's sitting there going, oh, fuck my ass, fuck my ass. I mean, technically you are. Right. Problem solved. What's the issue, Connor? Yes. No, all right, I'll take it. I'll take it ass. Technically you are. Problem solved. What's the issue, Connor? Yes.

No, all right. I'll take it. I'll take it. Yeah, you will. Let us know how that goes, too. Yeah, you will. Keep us informed. I want to know how big does a butt have to be

to titty fuck some butt cheeks? I don't think super big. It's like boobs. Yeah. It doesn't have to be super big for you to be able to do it. Right. Yeah, I think that's a boobs. Yeah. It doesn't have to be like super big for you to be able to do it. Right. Yeah. I think that's a misconception amongst small, small boobed girls being like, oh, I can't

do that. I'm like, yes, you can. For sure. And I can do it to a hand. You can do it like anything. By the way, is he still on the line? No. I just keep going back to that call he had yesterday.

It wasn't even just what and why he said it. It was how he said it. I'm what they call well-endowed and blessed. That's why we shamed you. You're probably not even, man. Yeah. You're probably not even. She probably just doesn't want to do it.

And she's gassing you up. As opposed to being like, you're gross. I do think that's just kind of, you know, you got to find the right person. I think if someone says no to that, they say no to that. That's fine. You know, usually there's some apprehension. Maybe you try, maybe you dabble.

But if there's a hard, like, it's just not for me. That's just not for you, man. It's not going to happen. And you follow it up with saying, and I love the girl. It's like, dude, it just seems like you kind of, like, what can we tell you? You kind of don't if you're like, what do I do? Yeah, I think if you're like, if you love somebody, you're just like, dude, it just seems like you kind of, what can we tell you? You kind of don't if you're like, what do I do? Yeah, I think if you're like, if you love somebody, you're just like, alright, this is the hand I was dealt.

Unless you just gotta TF some BCs. Yeah. There's your answer. A little TFBC for the weekend. All of a sudden, it's now shortened and I'm, this is never going to die. I need someone listening to this show to try it out this weekend

and let us know on Monday how it went. Why don't you just try it out yourself? I don't know. If I can find some BCs to TF, I will TF some BCs. Yeah. And I can pretty much tell you how it's going to go. I mean, probably pretty cool. I mean, again, you got to find the right size, but it's definitely going to work.

Yeah. It's going to be the greatest thing ever. You're going to lube up those beasties. Yeah, I mean, God. It's Friday. Yeah, I was trying to think of how this would work logistically. Yeah, you just kind of squeeze them together. When these conversations start and I turn around and I see that we have eight minutes, however long left.

Oh yeah, we got a long way to go. It makes me want to kill myself. We're probably on the fourth. Would it not be... It's a pretty easy thing. I think you guys are making it seem like it's a wildly hard thing to do. No, I think it's very easy.

I'm just saying, I think these are things that should be welcomed by your gender. It's pretty easy. I mean, I'm just saying, I think these are things that like should be welcomed by, by your gender. Yeah. Pretty easy. I mean, I've never seen anything like it though. I've like,

I just thought of the concept and you've seen that happen. Yeah. You haven't seen a porn where someone just kind of, no, never. Yep. Never. I've never seen anybody.

It's a pig in a blanket. Never seen that. When, when it kind of like hold them with the fingers and you hold it down with your thumbs you make like the U the U sign you put it down

so have you done it before I mean I've never done it to like completion you've done it wow I never slipped out I would just welcome these things as a chick TFing I, wow, I never, I never even. Slipped out, keep going. I would just welcome these things as a chick. Yeah, I don't.

TFing, TFing BCs. I gotta just sit here, nothing like is inside of me, nothing hurts me, nothing penetrates me. This is easy, this is easy money, dude. I bet, that probably felt good for the girl, at least a little bit, right? It's gotta feel like a massage good, you know, and you're not gonna get off on it, but it's like, oh.

Yeah. Feels nice. This feels deece. decent yeah i'm not gonna say no right better than the alternative you know what's gonna suck is if i ever like try it out like i'm gonna think of you guys you're gonna see this mug we have tf and some bc yeah i'm gonna be like god damn it i'm tf and these bcs and i love it if i ever just like facetime you if that happens yeah i don't know i just want to like see your mug i'll just let you know how it goes yeah i'll now boy we got a in these BCs and I love it. Do me a favor, just FaceTime me if that happens. Oh my god. I'll just let you know how it goes. Oh boy, we got a call on the matter. No!

Stu from Mississippi, what do you got? Hey, just so you guys know, I had to get out of the car for a second and hop back in. I don't know if anyone's called in yet or not, but if you are titty fucking butt cheeks, it's called hotdogging. Yeah.

Hotdogging. Got you in a blanket. Yeah. Yeah. What'd you think? Yeah. Hotdogging. There you go.

Thank you, Stu. Yeah. I mean, I prefer TFNBCs. Oh, Michael, who called in yesterday to reply to Connor, is now calling in to reply to Connor's second call, which replied to Michael. What's up, Michael? Nothing much. I just had the same complaint as Connor. I never really got any advice either on my Tiny Talk stuff.

That's true. Guess what? Same advice. Everybody can TF some BCs, big, small, or otherwise. That's where we're going. We're hot-dogging. As a matter of fact, you'll be completely engulfed.

It'll probably be great for you. I am going to be honest. I'm a little disappointed you guys didn't wear him out. What do you mean? Y'all didn't wear him out when he called in. It was kind of tame on him. He kind of walked it back a little bit.

He basically apologized like a little bit. Yeah, I mean, he basically apologized like a little, like a big dick bitch boy, and then said you were funny. Well, I appreciate that, but he also said that he called a humble brag. Yeah, I mean,

that's ridiculous. You think he actually called for advice? No, I mean, of course not. I was just looking for some advice. Yeah. You were looking for some advice after you tell everyone you got a big penis. Get the fuck out of here. Yeah. Michael, you have a very great weekend with your tiny dick while you TF some BCs, okay?

Hot dog! Be hot dogging all weekend. Casey just kind of gives a whole new meaning to the term let the dogs out. Yeah. Be hot dogging. I can't wait for the next wedding that me and Kevin are at so we can TF some BCs. All I know is that yesterday, whenever Kevin was doing an ad read for

CBD peanut butter for the dogs, and you're just doing your job with Devlin, everything's fine, all of a sudden, in the fucking corner, I hear Jared barking like this show, and I was like, it is not between the hours of one and three. I do not have to be subjected to that was great i just like as i'm doing the ad read i just hear like that's my dog by the way i tasted that peanut butter pretty good i mean that

i've read the ingredients it's it's cbd md like cbd oil peanut butter the ingredients is just dry roasted peanuts mashed up and the c oil. So it's the same thing. And they put a dog on the cover. So it's dog food all of a sudden. Wow. But I was eating that shit. And you and your dog can both enjoy. It is just peanut butter.

Yeah. Organic peanut butter. It actually, see, I prefer. You rip that label off and you put like a Whole Foods organic on there. Same shit. Done. And it gets you, you know, a little loose. Huh.

Loosens you up. More missing Memphis. Peanut butter for dogs. That's the thing. That's what it does. I expected to see some sort of like, I don't know, dog food type of ingredient. And it's just roasted peanuts mashed up. That's it.

Huh. I guess he had water or something to make it like a little bit like. Soluble. Yeah. It's like if I just crushed peanuts, it wouldn't become like gooey. It would become like sandy almost, you know? So they must do something. But they do. put the that kind of stuff in the regular organic are you a chunky or a smooth smooth yeah i'm smooth i don't do it thank god i was gonna have to kick

somebody off the show if they said no crunchy chunky and then how about the people who go like super extra crunchy the ones that it's like it's like you're just eating a giant peanut like i could eat i like peanuts by themselves right but if i'm trying to eat something with peanut butter it needs to be smooth just like orange juice you put pulp in my orange juice it'll fucking kill you I'll tolerate if you go to a restaurant

and there's some in it but the people who go out and seek out and buy extra pulp come on you're chewing your orange juice it's like in your teeth afterwards you know what really grosses me out about pulp and this is why I can't do it the word pulp You're chewing your orange juice. You're like, fuck are you doing? You're taking your teeth afterwards. You know what really grosses me out about pulp?

This is why I can't do it. The word pulp. It makes me think of skin. You have a sunburn and your skin is peeling. You're mortified. Basically, that's just orange skin. You're drinking skin when you drink pulp. I don't like pulp,

but I was going to say I'm okay with a little pulp in my grapefruit juice. I'm no longer okay with that. It's like Austin Powers, like Goldmember. Stop, Kevin. He just dropped it in the orange juice and said, do you like gold? Do you like orange juice? That's just... I don't have an appetite anymore, so thank you. I was very hungry.

Just talk to me and your diet's all good, you know? The word pulp just... just doesn't bother me. Pulp. Pulp. Pulp. Somebody tweeted you last week, a like horrible tryptophobia thing. Oh,

I probably have them blocked. It was like, even I, I opened it and I saw it and I was going to text you and be like, don't open that tweet. But then like, maybe you would have, I was like,

it's better. I can't remember what it was. Can we not talk about it? It was bad for would have I was like it's better I can't remember what it was it was even bad for me it was like the neck surgery thing yeah yeah I didn't see that it was like you don't need to get a facelift anymore what they do is individually hit your pores

with like light or something so this person was just getting dots all over their face you would have died I'm dying just thinking about it yeah yeah no most of the people that think that's funny like they're blocked or muted and they're just like sending them into the abyss yeah i love doing that like it's like listen i'm not gonna like block you or mute you for like much but you're gonna try to hit my phobia because

you think it's funny i'm never gonna see it so you're wasting how much money would you pay to get rid of that phobia a lot what's your number i don't know because now i can think about is that stupid neck surgery you're talking about yeah is it like 10k or is it like you know if i told you like 100 grand like you have to go into like you know but like you work your way out of it i wouldn't go into debt for it because obviously i've lived my life managing it but i would pay to get rid of it but nothing like life changingchanging money. Probably not. $25,000. I might pay $25,000 a year. Wow! That's crazy.

I might. I mean, it has gotten a lot better. Not the phobia, but I don't have to see as much. You gotta go like Batman. You know how Batman just immersed himself in the fucking bats? No! You gotta just go hang out in a patch of mushrooms that are all over you.

She's just scratching her neck, folks. Let's hit a break. When we come back, hour number two on CCK. Miami. South Beach. Bringing the heat. Can y'all feel that? Can y'all feel that?

Jig it out. Here I am in the place where I come, let go. In Miami, the bass and the sunset low. Every day like a Mardi Gras. Everybody party all day. No work, all play, okay? So we sip a little something, lay the rest to spill. Me and Charlie at the bar running up a high bill.

Nothing less than hell when we dress to kill. Every time the ladies pass, they be like, Can y'all feel me? All ages and races, real sweet faces. Outro Music Two days in Miami, the city that keeps the roof blazing. you you you