KFC Radio - CCK Podcast: Pool Parties & Death Island

Episode Date: July 29, 2019

Kfc, Carrabis, Kayce and Feits recap the AC Pool Party, Kate wants to know who gets to blog another bloggers death, Kayce has salty eyebrows, Ria's bday, Kayce's cameo in the Pup Punk video, and a Anne's trip to the island in the Bronx full of dead bodiesYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's another edition of the CCK Podcast. Today's podcast is brought to you by the Barstool Sports Store. We had the Christmas in July sale earlier this week. If you weren't smart enough to get in on that deal, don't worry. The store is still cooking. All items and all all brands all

collections still available right now uh the viva collection right now we got everything from henley's to hoodley's hoodies quilted sherpa we got sweatpants joggers we got regular joggers we got jackets bombers windbreakers the whole nine all of it minimal branding black and gray pretty neutral stuff i know some people are a little like hey it's a sports blog why would i get my clothes but listen i went out there and i found myself a designer his name is rich franklin he's one of the best custom sneaker creators in the game he's one of the most uh fashion forward uh clothes uh creators out there and he's doing the entire viva line so it's not like it's. I found someone who knows what the fuck they're doing.

So he's making some nice cut-and-sew, high-quality garments that are, I told him, listen, Barstool people, they want to be, like, a little bit fashion-forward, but they don't want to look like an asshole. They don't want to look like they're trying too hard. That's exactly what the Viva line is. It's normal, plain clothing with just a little bit of, you know, a little bit of streetwear influence, A little bit of style in there. You're not going to walk around looking lame, but you're not

going to look like a tryhard either. Go to store.barstoolsports.com I got the Viva Collection. Feidelberg has a million t-shirts out there. Casey's got some clothes. The Rockets got section 10 and starting 9. Go to store.barstoolsports.com. Get all your clothing you need. Today on the CCK

podcast, we had ourselves a big week. Marty Mush was in the mix a few times. That's always an absolute fiasco. He was recapping the City Boys heading out to the AC pool party with Casey and Willie. They met up with the Caddy Girls. So the City Boys and the Caddy Girls taking a picture for the agents. That will go down in history at Barstool Sports. Frame that picture.

Put it in the Hall of Fame at the stool. We actually should get a picture of that and hang it up in the studio here. It was that iconic with the four idiots, Mush, Tommy, Wiejewski, Big Ev, all those morons surrounded by like 59 smoke shows in Atlantic City. Zod got completely blacked out. We talked about that. Big Ev ended up throwing up.

Glennie Balls was in all of his glory. What else did we do? We talked to Kate. She joined for a little bit. We talked about what would happen if a Barstool blogger died. Who would blog it? Who would go viral? Who would write your eulogy? We always talked, of course,

the Rocket. We talked about his appearance. That's always a staple here on CCK we talked about his appearance that's always a uh staple here on cck rocket's hair rocket's clothes rocket style uh a lot of dick talk uh fights joined i mean at this point basically feidelberg is uh is the fourth co-host of the show he's happy now that's really fucking annoying uh nate versuske Zucker. Homeless people galore. It was a big-time, jam-packed episode. So let's get into it. It's the best of CCK.

Let me take a seat. Where's Big Ed? I know Big Ed's coming. Here he comes. Just watching these guys just walk today just has a different feel to it. It really is. Everyone's looking at us and just, like, smiling. They're so happy for us.

Basically, like, these guys walking around the office today, they're like the fucking oil rig guys who came back in Armageddon. You just look at them different now. Big F, so I heard that you puked at the thing. Yeah, I got told that by Jetski after. Oh, you don't remember puking? No, he told me. Well, now I'm pissed because he told me only him and Willie saw.

But I don't give a fuck. I mean, you puked all over the cabana. Did I really? Like bad? No, you did it in the back. In the back of the cabana, you puked all over the cabana. Did I really? Like bad? No, you did it in the back. In the back of the cabana. Right, in the back of the cabana. And he was wiping her off with a water bottle.

Did you rally after that? Well, I guess I got back. What I remember is we went to Borgata. I gambled more. Then we got back to Oceans. I gambled more. I kept drinking. And then I think I just passed out.

And then I woke up. Jetski came in the room and I just shut up. And I was like, what time is it? And I was praying he was going to say like 11. He goes two. And I was like, oh my God. So that's what we need to get to. So then I jumped.

So I threw all my clothes on and I jumped and we got up and we, uh, I realized I was up like 500 bucks. I was fired up. So we go down to the room and all these girls, they're like, like, oh, like what's up? And I gave him the look like I just couldn't remember. And they were like, we were like with you at the pool party. And now I'm like, oh, like what's up? See, I didn't even know that. But yeah, well, what's up? And I gave them the look like I just couldn't remember. And they were like, we were with you at the pool party. And now I'm like, oh, what's up? See, I didn't even know that.

But yeah, that's what we need to get to from there. The last time I saw you before we left was we were sitting at a blackjack table, me, Kelsey, and PFT. And I could just see you in my view. And you, lights on, no one's home. And you were just by yourself at a blackjack table. I was like, there's no way he's making it up. No way. You had no chaperone with you. I knew you had thrown up on the back of blackjack table. I was like, there's no way he's making it out. No way. You had no chaperone with you.

I knew you had thrown up on the back of the cabana. I was like, Big Ev is toast. So when I saw the picture come out, the famous entourage picture at this point, and you weren't there. I was sad. I was devastated seeing it. Because I knew me and Zal was like, we would have just, like, that's my element. Like, at the club like that, like, that's where I thrive. So I was devastated when I saw this.

I have a question. In your circle of friends from back home, are you known as the puke guy? I feel like you puke. That's your move. Yeah, I definitely throw up, but I just keep going. That's what I figured. I'm a guy. I'll throw up on purpose.

If I start getting my stomach feels a little sick, whatever, I'll throw up so I can keep drinking. I don't want to be the pussy that's like, no, I don't want the shot because I'm going to throw up. I'll go throw up so that I can take the shot. So you made yourself throw up on Saturday? I don't remember. Probably not. I didn't want to be the pussy that's like, no, I don't want the shot because I'm going to throw up. I'll go throw up so that I can take the shot. So you made yourself throw up on Saturday? I don't remember. Probably not. I didn't eat anything. I was telling the girl I was like three-quarters vodka, a quarter Red Bull.

And she was just feeding me that. Oh, yeah, the bottle service girl was hooking us up. We've got Eric on Philly that wants to talk about you throwing up. Eric, what's up? Hey, what's up, Big M? What's going on? Wait. Yup. No, I was saying, Big M? What's going on? Wait. Yup.

No, I was saying, when you're a bigger guy, you have no idea how much you're consuming, so that's why you become the puke guy, because it's just like, drink, drink, drink, drink, and then it catches up to you, and then it's just game over. No, there's no chance I'm giving you the big card on this. No, if you know your tolerance, it doesn't matter how small or big you are. Everyone knows their own tolerance.

I don't know about that. So, does that mean that, like, Ellie being tiny, like, she just can't keep drinking because she doesn't know her tolerance versus Big F? Like, that doesn't make any sense. I think it catches up later to him. I guess I get what he's saying, because I will just, like, force feed myself

alcohol and just not think about it, and then out of nowhere, you're just so fucked up. I mean'm not giving myself I'm just I definitely do I just throw up like on my stomach I don't know I just I will throw up and just keep going yeah it's like a defense mechanism I'm definitely not like I'm definitely not an iron stomach guy like if I eat like shitty food I'll throw that up too but you don't know you don't contribute that to being like your mama's favorite big boy you just throw up yeah that's just that's just what it is yeah you can't i can't get a nice way to call him fat your mama's big boy favorite favorite big boy i don't fat shame but the best part about this whole thing was when we first because first of all big ev we were trying to wake him up to come and it was just me jessica and glenny and first of all what a crew that is

and we got a table right next to dj's like prime time everyone sees us and it's just us three sitting there like fuck i have a video just like us three like i was like dude we gotta do something we're just sitting here like schmucks and we're dancing and we finally i saw this girl across the way and i just kept going like this she kind of looked at us and like was talking but we obviously didn't hear her i I was like, all right, just come over here. They brought their bottle. All of a sudden, it was snap of a finger. It was like 15 girls everywhere. And supposedly, I didn't even know until today.

Look how happy he is. I'm so happy for you, Colin. No, we had a great night. We had a lot of fun. I like having fun in AC. It was a good time. Like I said, I was texting that girl the whole time. I knew that was those girls.

Yeah, I had no idea. Why didn't you fucking tell them to come over? I did. I'll show you the texts. I'll show you the checks. I'll show you the receipts. Regardless, they come over. And now to see, we needed a picture, obviously. It was a great picture.

And then it was Makeout City at one point. Makeout City, please. I was tongue-darting some girl. She almost poked out my tooth. And she is, I looked her back today. She is a rocket. Glennie had a doctor. Tommy's getting massaged by some jewel girl.

Jetski's swapping spit. It was an unbelievable scene. And the thing about me and Tommy were saying, every time we're like, we should probably ask them to go back to the room now. Because we're already hooking up with them, let's go. But then we're like, we'll get to it. We have this in the bag. There's no chance we're not going to have with her let's go but then we're like ah we'll get to it we have this in the bag there's no chance

we're not gonna have sex with one of these girls and then we just kept letting it go and go and go we're just chilling at the club

and then we finally brought like eight girls back to my room and first of all how do you not close that's what I'm saying how do you not close

it's wild to me that none of you guys close this story Marty better end with a fucking fire alarm getting going. Can I just eliminate myself from this? Because the girl I was with the whole time, she didn't come to the room. She was like 30 and went back to her room. What the fuck's wrong with me? It doesn't matter.

You had a girl literally riding your back at some point in this room. That girl is – she gives all the sass. Yeah, it's like – Hold on. Hold on. hold on. Let me just say something really quick. Because sitting here listening to you guys

tell this story, I feel nothing but awful for Big Ev, but at the same time, like, he almost comes out of this looking better. He's like,

I was passed out, like I didn't have the chance. Same thing was up. No, he was in the room. Big Ev was in the room with eight girls. But he was on another planet. Do you remember this?

No, he came back. He was so good. That was when I woke up and I was like, all right, now I rejuvenated, we show up to the room, I see all eight girls. I jumped in, so I got in. But he was on another planet. Do you remember this? No, he came back. He was very good. That was when I woke up, and I was like, all right, now I've rejuvenated. We show up to the room. I see all these girls. I'm like, all right, bet. Yeah. The girls, they recognized me.

They were like, oh, from that you were jumping in the pool at the party. I was like, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh, the pool jumping guy. I didn't really remember. I didn't really remember, but I was like, fuck it, yeah. So we sat down. We have the eight girls.

And first of all, Glennie, you're not excused. There are still eight girls in the room. You had to go on top of each other. The one that I was making out with at the club was not there. Mine wasn't either. Glennie, you were making out with the girl at the club? No, she's not. Yeah, you had a doctor. The girl I was hooking up with at the club?

No chance. She's an occupational therapist. She lives in Harlem. We're going to get married. We're going to karaoke. Did you get her number, at least? Yes, of course. All right, cool.

What am I, a trash bag? Of course I did. I was texting her yesterday. Anyway, it was just me in the room with Glennie, and Jessica went to go get Big Ev, and Tommy was on his way, and that girl was massaging Glennie. You've seen that video, right? Oh, yeah.

No, but that was after, though. He looks naked, by the way. I do look very naked. No, because when I walked in, and she did a thing where she showed me her tits. See, we had that before. Me and Glennie had that before, and then I said, and she did a thing where she showed me her tits. See, that's what I had. We had that before. There was that before. Me and Glennie had that before.

And then I said, hey, all she was doing, she was explaining what inverted nipples were. Okay. And we're like, oh. We were like, we're educational guys. We wanted to understand what she was saying. So she's like, yeah. Just let me. I was like, so let me see what the inverted nipples are.

Oh, well, I got them pierced to make them not inverted. Oh, and she just rips open her shirt. So Big Ev walks in. I say, Big Ev, this girl has inverted nipples. Do you want to learn about it? As being an educational guy, I'm like, of course I would like to learn. We're just educational. He's like, of course.

And again, rips open his shirt. This is what happens. And then she really explained it. And then Tommy walked in. Tommy, you know about the inverted nipples? And then she gave me a massage, Big Ev. Then Glennie got like a 20-minute massage. Yeah.

And then this is where we went wrong. This is where it all went downhill. We fumbled on the wrong line. So I had a girl on my arm. Big Ev had a girl on her arm. Glennie's getting massaged. Jesse had a girl. And this one girl was so persistent on going down the gamble.

She was a degenerate. She was an absolute degenerate. Sounds like my kind of lady. Yeah, no, she was cool as shit. No, she was white material. I ended up getting her number after. Yeah, but that's the thing. This is where it went wrong because then she's kept peppering into people's head to go gamble.

And a couple of them got up to go gamble. And then we left. And we went to go gamble. And then we left. And we went to go gamble at 5 a.m. in the morning. And then the crowd kind of started weeding out as to the point then there was probably like four girls, like all of us. Everyone left. There was a point it was only just me, the girl, and Jetski. And I felt bad because I kind of like stole the girl from Jetski.

Jetski was just hammered, like not playing. Me and the girl were playing. She was loving it. We were both on a heater. And we were just hammered like not playing me and the girl were playing she was loving it we were both on a heater and we were just there till like 7 30 in the morning and then i felt bad that jessie was just sitting there i was up like almost a grand i was like jessie you want to get the fuck out of here and he was like yeah and then she stayed and then that was that was kind of it yeah it was a she was a degenerate i mean when you guys left for the casino i still had a sad story ever i still had a drink. It's the saddest story ever. I still had a drink, so I had like a shot left. This was like 28 to 3.

I also just found out that the girl I was tongue-darting with is a mother. Oh, yeah. She's great. Yeah? How old is she? I don't know. I got to show you. She is.

Is she like a young mom or is she a MILF? Young mom. I think. Love that. I don't know. Respect to all the young moms out there. That's why I was. Now I'm upset now more that I didn't get to know her more.

And the fact that. You had all night to get to know her. These girls didn't know who they were. They all were caddy girls. Yeah, they were caddies. They go to events and just caddy for people. What? Yeah, so they had a caddying event in AC on Friday.

They were all just like hot caddies. I mean, this is... Casey, let me see this picture. Send this over to... Let me see this picture. Yeah. She's got some... Are you a fucking tongue dart in this girl? She looks like a fucking... This looks animated. She's got some red. You were fucking tongue-darting this girl?

She looks like a fucking animator. This looks animated. She looks like a Siamese cat. She's great. This looks like a girl that was drawn. This is not a real person. She has some warlocks. Yeah, no, these things are obviously, they're built for this.

She's got a bad back. Was she the one in the room? No, that's what I'm saying. She had big titties in the video. I know. Was her kid there? She's not, bro. She's next to you. She's a fitness model? No, that's what I'm saying. She had big titties too. I know. Was her kid there? She's not, bro. She's next to you.

She's a fitness model. No, she's not. She's a fitness model because her Instagram ends with fit. Yeah. So you know that she's one of those girls. Did I care at the moment? No, that's not a bad thing. That's a good thing.

She works at Hooters. You buried the lead there. I don't know if she works at Hooters. What do you mean all of a sudden? She's a caddy girl. Maybe it was Halloween. She's wearing a Hooters name tag. The caddy girls in the weekend.

The caddy's like their side job. The girl that I was playing black jigger, she was telling me she was going to be like a cop. The first girl I was with was also buying and selling horses. I hooked up with her, too. I hooked up with three girls that night. That's like still pretty sick. Well, you made out with them. You made out with them.

That's hooked up. No, it's not. We've had that. We've had the discussion on the show before. I tongue darted three girls. I mean you made out with him. You made out with him. Yeah. That's hooked up. No, it's not. We've had that. We've had the discussion on the show before. I tongue darted three girls. I mean, I found a wife. That was good. Yes.

Everyone. We're going to Korean barbecue and karaoke. If you're just making out, that's not a hookup. Wait, you have a date? Yeah. You have an actual date on the books? Not yet, but I'm going to. I told her we're going to Korean barbecue and karaoke this week or next week, and she

was very down. She told me she likes bears, which I guess I'm a bear. Bears as in like the gay bears? No, that's usually a gay term. Yeah, that's a gay term. But I don't know, that's what you told me. Some girl comes over to me at the club and

goes, that's your friend Glennie, right? I was like, yeah, why? She goes, that girl he's with? That's her type. Big boys. I love that. I was like, that's my guy right there. I love that. Big boys. Something else we went over. Here we go.

Oh, yeah. No, I knew this was coming. This bullshit. Makeout City, baby. Population us. We got a lot of these idiots here in Barstool kissing strangers over the weekend in Atlantic City. I mean, I'm still disappointed that nobody closed, but, like, Marty making out with three different chicks,

like, that's not the worst. That's a good night. The story is way better. I mean, you definitely, like, you were basically on the one-yard line and you didn't get a touchdown, but at least you kicked a field goal. Yeah, I kicked a field goal. I'm all clear on all of this, by the way. I was dead.

Yeah, Zaha. That's what I'm saying. Zaha, I know you were upset that you missed it all, but I kind of side with Jared here. It's like you have plausible deniability. Like I didn't close because I was dead. And that's, I mean, that's. But Zaha also would have fucked all of them.

That kind of situation is, I mean, I do my best work in situations like that. So I was absolutely disappointed. Dude, that table was perfect chair dancing. And you're the chair dancing champion over there. Here I am, passed out like a schmuck. So we're here on CCK recapping Atlantic City, the pool party that we had with this crew. 833-857-8665.

We're going to go out to Connor, New Jersey before we get to the Glenny Balls story of the night. Connor, what's up? I can't wait to tell us. Hey, what's going on, everybody? How you doing? Good. I was at AC

and, like, my cabana kind of had, like, a view of you guys. Oh, boy. You guys were going insane. Yeah, we were. Yeah. Yeah, we were.

It's not every day that I have a private pool at a pool. I wasn't, like, sitting there watching, obviously, but I would go back for a drink and I'd take a glimpse. And so, like, sitting there watching, obviously, but I would go back for a drink, and I'd take a glimpse. And so, like, one time I saw Zal almost fall over the glass. I was dying. Oh, yeah, it was insane.

I saw, I think, like, Big Ed did, like, a pencil or something. And he hopped. When he, like, stood up, his, like, half of his ass was out. Oh, probably. Big Ed's ass was out a lot. He was wild. That was a great party. That was very fun.

At one point, Zah was getting twerked on his chest. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that was my friend. I had two girls that I knew. His eyes were just so out of it, and he's just looking, and this girl just bounced her ass on his chest. I saw the video. She was ramming her ass into my throat. Oh, video. She was ramming her ass into my throat.

Oh, yeah. She was trying to kill you with her ass. Bend down a little bit. Very hot, too. Very hot. If double vodka dawn is going to go down, it's going to be death by ass. And this girl was a rocket ship, too. So, Zah, you almost got killed by a rocket's ass.

You know what's going to be funny is the next time that there's one of these pool parties at AC and the guys from Barstool that are going to be there, it's going to be funny is like the next time that there's one of these pool parties at AC and the guys that are from Barstool that are going to be there. It's going to be like the old horny dudes. It's going to be like me, Kevin. Fire's going to be like, where are the bitches at? We got to recreate a picture. Yeah, that's what's funny is you know the scene is different whenever Willie Colon, PFT, and I were basically chaperones.

Like when we're in there just playing flip cup, just like getting drunkFT, and I were basically chaperones. Yeah. Like when we're in there just playing flip cup, just like getting drunk by ourselves and watching you guys just rake. That's what I, I was texting with people being like,

these dudes are raking right now, which is why I was really hoping I was going to wake up to text messages on Sunday that you guys closed. You didn't. You didn't.

You didn't. But hey, Makeout City, whatever. At least we're not lying. We're not lying. We could have been like, yeah, we sang. That's a great night. we're not lying we're not lying we could have been like that's a great night

honestly Marty you could have done more yes but like making it with three very hot girls in one night that's not terrible

you're with your boys literally at a club like I said before like Marty what you did that's like the best night of a lot of guys lives

yes of course like oh dude I went to the fucking club I made out with three really hot girls like that's like that's the of a lot of guys' lives. Yes, of course. Like, oh, dude, I went to the fucking club. I made out with three really hot girls. Like, that's the peak of their existence at some point. Like, you, because of the position that you were in, it's viewed as somewhat of a failure,

but it's not a complete failure. In reality, it's not, yeah. And like I said, it was such a good night that we were going to be talking about this forever. Literally, we were all hugging at the club saying, we don't deserve this. I love this place. Thank you, Dave.

The tweets that you guys had thanking Dave was really funny. It's also smart because when Dave sees the videos and the pictures, now you guys are going to be under a bigger magnifying glass because it's like, oh, wow, they're raking it all. The bar's still rubbed. What do they do to deserve that? Everyone that was there, it was like the barstool rub. Like, what do they do to deserve that? So, I mean, everyone that was there. Yeah, it was very smart to thank Dave immediately.

He asked me how the party was. And I explained, you know, exactly what happened. And I was like, and I'm sure you've seen the picture of the club. And he was like, that is unreal. I think like he's like, because he's he likes all of us, I think. I hope so. Well, we don't know. You never know with Dave.

So him seeing those pictures He's gotta be like This is unreal Yeah I mean that's what he said He said that was unreal I will say I was happy Because the guy from Bounce

Texted him a picture of me and Tommy In the daytime And he just wrote back Love it So I was like alright Thank you Yeah the guys from Bounce are cool I was one thing I will say

I was very proud of myself Going into the casino At 430 by myself I was stopped by a hooker And I said no Atta boy Glennie Atta boy I was on the escalators By myself. I was stopped by a hooker, and I said no. Atta boy, Glennie. I was on the escalators by myself, and she was like, oh, you want a little company?

I was like, I'm honestly so tempted right now. This is the most tempted I've ever been to get a hooker, but I gotta go downstairs. What did she look like? She was actually pretty cute. She looked like an Italian woman that had a lot of plastic surgery, but still, I mean, that's pretty good for a hooker.

How old are we talking? She was probably like 32. I got her number, but I didn't text her, I think. Good rate? Yeah, I got a hook okay but I didn't text her good rate yeah I got a hooker's number what was the rate how much did she ask for I didn't ask

I was like oh you didn't even get to the payment I'm saying no and I was very proud good for you good boy good for you

we didn't even go to bare exposure to but yeah they had a lot of plans to go to strip clubs well as if we didn't have sex and we didn't

but it was also we're up to those girls didn't leave my room till like 6 a.m. And then we went to the fucking, because you're a stupid motherfucker as we are. So, Glennie. Stupid. All right. Yeah, let me set the scene here. Why don't you go ahead and tell the story?

Because Glennie's not going to tell it. By the way, the fact that he got offered sex by a hooker, that that's not the highlight of the night, that'll tell you what story is about to come. So this girl, the inverted nipple girl, was given, first of all, like jet ski massage in the club. Jet ski has a shirt off in the club just to get a massage. Yeah, I mean jet ski has a shirt off a lot. And also, by the way, at the club, I swear they thought we were like actual like important people. I had a security guard literally just designated for me. And like we went to the bathroom. They escorted us to the bathroom.

Like, I kicked out a bride at our table. He's like, do you want anyone not here? I was like, yeah, the bride. We don't need her here. We don't need her here. What was she going to do for us, you know? She's getting married. I mean, if these girls didn't know Barstool at all,

it would look like that all day because we had so much security even at the pool party. You couldn't go anywhere without a security guard being with you. So if they don't know Barstool at all and they look at you guys, I can assume they would think you guys are like A-listers. Yeah, exactly. Which is obviously not the case. I love the bride ejection.

Yeah. I mean, what is she going to do? Did her bridesmaids stay? No. Four of them all left. Oh, well, that was good. Bridesmaids by then. Well, we don't need.

We had 15 of them already. I know, but I'm saying it would have been even more savage. Were good bridesmaids by then. Well, we don't need... We had 15 of them already. I know, but I'm saying it would have been even more savage. Were the bridesmaids hot? I don't even... I literally saw the veil thing. It's kind of like a fair trade-off. It's like, all right, we'll take the bride if she's got four hot bridesmaids. There was a bachelorette party that walked into the pool.

I don't know if you guys saw them. Right when we got there, they all were wearing the pink. They were fucking rockets. We saw one that she had Saturdays for the brides at. That was nice. Oh, I didn wearing the pink. Oh, yeah. They were fucking rockets. We saw one that she had a Saturdays for the Brides hat. That was nice. Oh, I didn't know that. That's cool.

Yeah, I saw the veil and I was like, no. She's got to go. She's got to go. Yeah. So then, yeah. So Jessie got a massage. I went into the room.

She gave me like a quick massage. Then Big Ev was like, she was really getting out not to Big Ev's back. Why is this girl just handing out massages? She literally like X. She loved it. She's like, do you want a massage? I was like, yeah. And then she was good at handing out massages? She literally, X, we didn't even,

she's like, do you want a massage? I was like, yeah. And she was good at it too. She was just a random girl. She didn't work for the club or anything?

she was part of the caddies. She's the inverted nipple girl. She's the one that's on Glennie in that video. Literally, that was literally within two,

like probably, legitimately two minutes of walking into the hotel room, she had already shown me her tits and she was unbuttoning my shirt to give me a massage. So, it was incredible so she was just there

for fun yeah this is her idea it was all her friends that were with us got it the catty girls she seems like an angel

great girl she was actually a sweetheart she really was awesome girl yeah so now Glennie's getting massaged did she make out

with anybody I hooked up with her for like about I'll give it myself, 14 seconds. Okay. Where was the power rankings? Where did she rank in the power rankings of girls you made out with?

First one was definitely the one I just showed you. Yeah. She was second. The third one was like she sells the horses. She sells horses and buys horses. She was good looking. You got to watch out for the horse girls. Yeah.

Horse girls are crazy. Damn a question. But regardless, she was like too nice. I to watch out for the horse girls. Yeah. Horse girls are crazy. Damn a question. But regardless, she was like, and she was like too nice, you know? I wasn't looking for a nice girl. Yeah. She was very nice. But you were in Atlantic City, so. Yes.

Regardless. Yeah, so now Glennie's getting massaged. First of all, my room, Glennie's fucking feet are all over my pillows. And like this guy's rolling around, not giving a fuck. They were. On my bed. Yeah, I know. I was like, Big Ed, look at these guys fucking. giving a fuck they were on my bed yeah i know i was like

big head look at this guy's fucking pulling his fucking feet on my pillow and all over it too just rubbing it like he wouldn't stop get off the pillows should have given me a heads up bro i did and i was i had to sleep on the other side i was gross but anyway so now this girl like she stands up and i'm not even kidding because i had like because I felt something on my neck a little bit. I felt like it was a little prick almost. Where is this going? I felt a little prick, and this girl, as she's standing up, goes, yeah, I haven't really gotten around to shaving my thighs.

And I was like, oh, my God, that's what was on my neck? And all of a sudden, Glenn Glennie goes I love hairy thighs I did not say that. Yes you did. Big F. She was right next to me. He definitely said something along those lines. And she was like on top of me with the hairy thighs and I felt bad so I said I like hairy thighs. Yes! That's what he said. I like hairy thighs.

I was trying to be nice. And then he says I'm trying to be nice And then before that This girl is like This girl is like Talking about how white she is And Sid goes Yeah you're really white

He's like telling this girl She's hot as shit She was from Nashville Just southern That was the Horse girl That was horse girl? Yeah

Oh she's wonderful Great girl I know She's wonderful Yeah he's like Oh you're white And this girl is sitting there And he's like

Oh you look mean It's like Glenn And, he's like, oh, you're white. And this girl was sitting there. He's like, oh, you look mean. It's like Glenn. And then he's telling this girl he loves hairy thighs. I almost threw up. Can you say it again exactly how he said it? He's making it seem like it's a porn the way he said it. It wasn't. It was like you were trying to be nice, but you were just like.

You said it pretty cheerfully. You were like, I love hairy thighs. It was like that. It wasn't like, oh, I love. It wasn't like sexual. I was like, I love hairy thighs. It wasn't like, oh, I love. It wasn't like sexual. I love hairy thighs. I love hairy thighs. And we all.

You tried to say it so smooth. I was just trying to be nice. You seemed concerned about the hairy thighs. You tried to say it so smooth like it was just going to play over the room and no one was going to be like, what? Well, and from what I understand, because, I mean, listen, as a girl, you have to shave your legs all the time. Like, there's a difference on if it's a little bit prickly and if she has hairy thighs. I felt it on my neck. That's the whole thing.

From what I'm understanding is we weren't talking, like, she just hadn't shaved for a couple days and, like, happened to be prickly. She had actual hairy thighs. No, she was, like, hot, too. It was just a little prickly. She was not, like, a sasquatch. She was hot. Give the girl some credit. She was not a sasquatch.

You said out there to Frankie that he was like a sasquatch. No, it was. Now you're walking it back. I feel like you're making it seem like she's legitimately had hairy thighs. It wasn't. I mean, she said it. She told me three days. She told me three days.

I literally felt it before she said it. We're talking about three days. You can't even see it. I mean, you definitely felt it. Yes, I felt it. So it was longer than three days. Regardless, she was a great girl. But plenty loves hairy thighs.

I mean, she was phenomenal. We've kind of all been in a similar situation where you've got to make the girl feel better about it. But not in front of all your boys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Usually that conversation doesn't happen in front of a room full of your friends. And if it doesn't, you're like, oh, yeah, it doesn't.

I love hairy thighs, though. I love hairy thighs. Can we make t-shirts?, oh yeah, it doesn't. I love hairy thighs though. Whatever. I love hairy thighs. Can we make t-shirts? Fire up the t-shirt machine. I love hairy thighs. Just a nice hairy thigh on the shirt. And like,

we were gonna let it go, but we all were just sitting there like, Glennie, what the fuck? We're back. Marstool Kate's in the building.

What's up, girl? Thanks for having me. I invited myself, but that's okay. Come on and join in. I love it. Kate's on the building. What's up, girl? Thanks for having me. I invited myself, but that's okay. Come on and join in. I love it. Kate's on the rundown tonight. We already recorded it.

Oh, damn. It's a fucking doozy. Basically, we were saying if, because every now and then we do things that like, for me, when I was in the Indy 500 in the Coke lot, I was like, I could die here, maybe. But it'd be, you think sometimes I could die, but wouldn't it be great for page views? Oh, for sure. Death is the ultimate page catalyst. It hasn't happened yet, you know?

So we were talking about if you did, God forbid, if something happened to you, who here would you want to blog? Your demise. And that was just like the tip of the iceberg on the rundown. It was one of those rundowns. That's a great topic. The rundown. The topics on the rundown were so bad.

And I flat out. When we have a slow summer day, I'd rather just call it out and be like, listen, guys. The rundown is the topics are bad. Let's try to make something out of nothing. And boy, did we do it. It's a doozy of a rundown. But that is such a great philosophical question. Who do you want to block?

I think it would depend on how I die. Right. Oh, like if you get like a golf ball to the head, you want like the foreplay guys to block? I think it would depend on how I die. Right. Oh, like if you get a golf ball to the head, you want the foreplay guys to block it? No, I think if it was like a funny, tragic accident, I would want you to just berate it. Yeah. Look at this dumb bitch. Yeah. Oh, which, by the way, so the reason Kate's here is because we're hosting a tour today.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he doesn't want to, he's not going to jump on the microphone, but, you know, very nice guy on a tour. I opened up the KFC radio studio today because I was showing him around and I hear, what the fuck do you want? You goddamn bitch. And I was like, yes, I'm, uh, I'm with like, you know, like a civilian here, like, so yeah, but no, that's what I would want. I would want you to berate my death.

Oh, let's hope it happens. I also feel like you can spin a yarn. I feel like you'd write a mean eulogy, Kevin. I feel like when you want to write, you can write. You know what? I've actually said this before is I don't write as much as I used to, but when I have the inspiration to, I can really write again. Oh, yeah.

Like the last blog I really wrote. Yeah, like when the rappers die. If rappers die. It's like when the rappers die. Yeah. If rappers die. It's like a top blog of the year. If rappers do anything, I can get it flowing. When I'm writing about my own shit and I have a real reason, I go back to not even blogging mode, like writing mode. Yeah.

You're using symbolism and you're coming up with a lot of shit. Yeah. But that means I'd have to care about your death. You know what I mean? Right. Would you care if I died? You get at least 3,000 words. I feel like I'd get a good eulogy.

Well, I mean, good is a relative term. I'd give you a quality written eulogy. I think you would miss me. Whether it would be good, we'll find out. I think you would miss me. I think it would be interesting to see what competition we would have for the third chair. Yeah, that would be fun. Post tryouts.

It'd be fights. Nah, maybe not. You never know. Wow, I guess I'm not in the room. Wow. Actually, I was going to say it would be better if we slid in another girl, so maybe it would be Kate. Maybe Kate would then become the number one suspect like she killed Casey. Whoa, you gave you the old Nancy Kerrigan treatment in a lot.

I mean, she kicked me off of high haters. That's how I ended up here. So who would you want to write yours? I feel like KB no swag. Could write one that people at the end, they'd be like, is Kate really dead? Is she here still? Is this a joke? Like, I feel like KB would put people in a pretzel over what really happened to me.

Well, at the same time, I feel like he would also roast that ever-loving shit out of me somehow. Or even my ghost wouldn't be able to figure out what he had done. And I'd be like, all right. That's a good one. He has just mastered the art of whether intentional or unintentional. You don't know what's going on. He was here the other day.

In person, it's the worst. We were discussing dick pics. And he was doing it in such a way that I was like, do you have my dick pics? What's going on here? He convinced Kevin that he had them. He was so like, there are just certain people who shouldn't be sending things if you're on a certain level at your career. And he wouldn't make eye contact with me. I was like, what's happening right now, baby?

And he just walks out like no big deal. I'm like, you've just thrown a stick of napalm in my brain. What's happening? You never know with him. Who would I have? It has to be fights, but it could be Keith. Keith is technically, you know, he's the writer of all writers and he is the first guy. You know, he knows me even longer than fights does does he's the only guy who knows me longer but fights probably knows me

better and and we've had more interaction um i wouldn't mind you writing mine i'd write a good one yeah because again it's writing it's not really blogging it's like you and you've written your book and shit like that that's what sucks like whenever someone dies in my family everyone's like oh well you're writing the eulogy, right? I'm like, why? Because I'm the writer. Yeah. That's a pretty like heavy.

Every time. Yeah. Every time. Tough job. Tough, tough job. Do you deliver them? Oh, yeah. I fucking crush eulogies.

Really? How many have you done? Probably three now. Do you cry during them? One of them I couldn't get through. Yeah. One of them. Yeah.

The only one I've ever done. They're like, you're a public speaker. It'll be fine. I just like sob the entire time. That has nothing to do with... Well, I know, but that's usually, it's like, oh, you're used to speaking. Go do it. I guess you have like 1% of a leg up.

You're a good writer and you can speak in front of people. It's like, yeah, well, this is a little bit different. A little tad different. A little bit different than Section 10 live shows. Who are you going with? Your dad? I thought about that, but I want things to be... He would not get that.

He wouldn't even spell my name correctly in my own eulogy. He also, I mean, part of writing a good eulogy is like knowing and caring about the person who's dead.

Yeah. He would be like, it would all come back to Dave. You know, he'd be like, one time I was eating pizza and like Caravis, that's how I invented Caravis.

For sure, Caravis, yeah. And then remember the time that I co-signed his apartment and you know, all that shit. I bet you, I mean, it would sure, caravans, yeah. And then remember the time that I co-signed his apartment? I bet you, I mean, it wouldn't be serious. It would have, like, funny moments in it, but I think he would do a good job with it. Sometimes I, you know, Dave, as much as we, like, clash, I think also there's a lot about him that I think is good and admirable.

Yeah, like when serious things happen. When the chips are down, me and him actually align more than good and admirable. When serious things happen. When the chips are down me and him actually align more than like anybody when it comes down to like important stuff. So I could see if I were to die. I've had visions of like when we sell this thing.

Yeah. And it's kind of like we did it. You know what I mean? Not like that's the end of it because I'm sure whoever buys this will keep us all on board or whatever. There's, you know, what's next. But a moment of, like, he started it and I joined on and we saw this thing through. And, like, what would the celebration moment be? You could get a hug?

I don't know. Like, if it was, like, me in fights, if, like, this happened with just KFC radio, it would be like we'd probably make out. It would be a hug and a kiss and we'd cry and we'd pop bottles. And I wonder if it was Dave what it would – how it would be. I think there would be a quiet moment. I could see – are either of you cigar smokers? No, but like – You would get one.

You'd go out to that little shithole. I don't know if anybody knows where my secret smoking area is up here. Which, by You go out to that little shithole. I don't know if anybody knows where my secret smoking area is up here. Which, by the way... It's a shithole. She has a secret smoking area? Is it like the scaffolding by my desk? Oh, no, Kevin. Do you go out there?

Oh, no, it's bad. It's like this little nook. What she has witnessed recently at her secret smoking area will give you nightmares. Oh, yeah, that too. What, is it like homeless people having sex or something? No, I literally, I showed her and our lovely guest here. At lunch. At lunch.

I'm sorry. We had just gotten like our burgers. Wait, I want to see it. Don't even tell me. I just want to see it. Okay. So. I want like the surprise reaction.

I was over behind. Is it too explicit to put on the internet? No. Well, if I blurt out the person's face. Okay. Because. It's disgusting. I'm very.

And it happened just right outside this building. If you zoom in, that's me. I'm very. And it happened just right outside this building. If you zoom in, that's me. I'm ripping a cig. My secret smoking spot is behind the one train. But basically, I went to smoke the other day, and I hear what sounds like a bucket of slop getting dumped out on the farm. And I turn around, and this lady has her pants at her ankles and has just taken a giant dumper right out like 15 feet behind me.

Now you're in New York. I did. I'm so unfazed. I was using my phone like a prison mirror watching it while I was smoking. I was like, well, ain't that the city?

Like, I just could not care less. I'll be honest. Like, I thought it was going to be even worse. It's like, oh, yeah. It's a homeless person shitting no big deal. Yeah, yeah.

Daddy, I've never witnessed that. That's disgusting. One of the first nights that I was here, I sent Koli a video of a homeless dude jerking off in Penn Station. yeah. Daddy, I've never witnessed that. That's disgusting. One of the first nights that I was here, I sent Coley a video of a homeless dude jerking off in Penn Station. He was like, I can't post this. Did I show you the guy,

the dude blowing the other guy in the subway tracks? No. I don't know. Is this on my old phone or my new phone? I might not have it because I can't remember when I got my phone. This guy, my buddy,

like friend of a friend who I haven't, we don't text much. Oh, here it is. Oh, my God. He sends me this. This was July 11th, Thursday night. This month? Yes.

Oh, this is like – Love is in the air. This was night prior. You can't – we can't post this. No, I mean it's way too explicit. But this was like 2.45 the night before. He says his friend filmed this. I'm like, yeah, your friend.

And it is super aggressive. We got... Goal! Oh, my God. We got an address out in the open, Chloe. The guy is sitting with his massive hog. And he's just chilling. He looks right at the cameraman.

That is a flex right there. That is a flex. That's a flex. That's why you're getting the blowjob in the subway because you have that kind of confidence. And I'll be honest, it's a terrible blowjob. And the dude that's giving the blowjob just never looks up at all. He was focused. He was way into it.

Locked in. I wouldn't be comfortable filming that. No, I would think they were going to kill me. Yeah, he just walked up. I mean, the camera is probably like a good five feet away from the blowjob. Yeah, he's right there, and the guy's just staring right at him. Big dick energy you can sense from a long way away. That guy had it.

That guy's dick is the size of the subway. Wow. So anyway, you and Dave are smoking your cigars out. I love when that happens. Like, how did we get here? And the sun is setting, and you're looking out over the city that you have conquered now. You both take a puff, and you just give each other the knowing look. Yeah.

That one we now have in movies. I think that the knowing look is probably way more probable. No, probable. But, yeah. Then, like, I can't even imagine what he would say. When Barstool sold the first time, we went, like a few of the Boston guys went out to the club and Dave came for maybe like an hour and a half and then he left.

Yeah. Did he say anything? Not really. I don't remember even that. Like it was a cool moment. I feel like I just probably got an email being like, that was more like, you know, that was like an investment in Barstool as opposed to like we're selling this thing.

You know what I mean? But I can't imagine there just being a moment of like, you know, like we did it and like we come so far. Yeah. I think it would just be like, all right, that happened. Yeah. There we go. But I don't know, maybe not. Well, hopefully we will find out and maybe hopefully sooner than later. I bet you'd say you're welcome to. Yeah. That I don't know. Maybe not. Well, hopefully we will find out. And maybe hopefully sooner than later.

I bet you he'd say you're welcome to. Yeah, that's what I mean. It would be like, you know. Or you know what? He'd be like, he'd refer to the one time I got a suit for $100 million. He'd be like, thank God you didn't fuck this all up for us. Like that dad that doesn't know how to be emotional. So they kind of joke with you a little bit.

Kind of hit you a little bit. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Or. It should be our like you know fucking entourage. Vinny Chase gets the big

movie moment or something and instead he'll just be like. Cool. You're going to touch me? Maybe. So you want Dave to do yours?

I think it would be between you Dave and I think Dan would do a good one too. No I think Dan would roast you., Dave, and I think Dan would do a good one too. No, I think Dan would roast you. Yeah. I don't know. I feel like he'd return the favor because I wrote him a nice thing when he didn't die. So I think that he would.

When you left the act. Yeah, when the act ended. That was emotional. Could I make a cameo? Sure. Just say my one sentence. I mean, I feel like if I'm dead, there's nothing I can do about it at that point. What's your one sentence?

I'm carabas and I like baseball. You can do that like at the funeral. And everyone in the stands after I say it does the jerk off motion. You can do that like at the funeral. Okay. That's fine. Just do it like sounds sad when you're saying it though. Or that would be better for the wake

when I stand up on the chair with the beer and I'm like, oh, I'm Corobis, and everybody else says, and I like baseball. That's how it should be. It should be a call and response thing. That would be amazing.

When I say, oh, I'm Corobis, and you say, I like baseball. And everybody does that, just a noise at the end, like, eww.

People are crying. Yeah. Your mom is crying and everybody eww. People are crying. Yeah. Your mom is crying and everyone's making jerk-off noises. Yeah. That's my boy. Noted. Loves his baseball. We got a call for the Rocket here.

Marshall DeHarto has a question for you. Oh. Marshall DeHarto, just a general question For Kravitz What is the look you're going for? Do you realize how ridiculous You look, like your hairdo and whatnot Now you see why you were listed In the system as Marshall the Hardo

Yeah, what's your look, Rock? I don't get it Well, it's kind of a hard-up move To call up a radio show, wait online And then be like, your look is ridiculous. Tell me what you're going for. Especially when you can't show us what you actually look like. And we weren't even talking about it.

Yeah. Like, you were so bothered by it that you called in. What's your Instagram? Let's check you out. Yeah. What's your Instagram? I want to see what this means. I don't have an Instagram.

Oh, you don't? You're so ugly, you don't even have an Instagram. Yikes. So how do you see what Jared looks like then if you don't have social media? How do you see what he looks like? I think I lost it. I think I lost it. All right.

I really legitimately want to know how you see what – Well, you're probably watching Barstool and watching content. What? Oh, Marshall. Oh, Marshall. Oh, Marshall. Marshall the hard-o. I mean, that guy stinks. Marshall, Marshall, Marshall.

At which point do you think he got off when he was like, so you're privileged, what's your law? He gets off calling people and ripping on them. I got to go, guys. I got to clean up the cum. Yeah. Oh, God, that was good. He lights a cigarette.

He hangs up. He's like, oh, God. I love roasted cologne. He might call the group text. I did it. Got him. I did it. I did it.

How did it go? Eagle landed. I mean, I'm doing something about my hair. I mean, I never claimed my hair to be great because I had never had hair before. It was just rocking the buzz cut. I grew it out, and I'm like, all right, well, what now? I don't know what to be great because I had never had hair before. It was just rocking the buzz cut. I grew it out, and I'm like, all right, well, what now? I don't know what to do with it. I mean, this is a guy, you know, some guys who don't have hair.

That guy was definitely bald. They don't like anybody with hair. Or receding hairline, like, really badly. Right. Maybe they don't like your tats because they're not, you know, tat guys. They can't have, you know, good-looking tats. Usually a lot of, well, anybody who's. Can't wear good-fitted shirts because they're probably too fat. Yeah. Now, They can't have, you know, good-looking tats. Usually a lot of... Anybody who's... Can't wear good-fitted shirts,

because they're probably too fat. Yeah. Now, if there's anything wrong with some of us, maybe we're into that. He's probably got awesome legs, though, bro. That's probably fair. Probably got really strong musculos. But you know what?

My legs are covered up by these cream pants today. Speaking of cream pants. I had a great moment. I was at Banana Republic Republic right by Grand Central. First of all, do you think I could wear white jeans? I've never had a pair of white jeans. Do you think I could pull off white jeans? Yeah, with like a blue.

Kate, don't lie. Because your first reaction was definitely no. And then you changed to yes. But then I thought about it. I thought about it. Because when you came in in the suit the other day, everybody was like, holy shitballs. There was some green pants there. And yes, was you know but i think you really could and i think if you did everybody would be like it would be like a whoa it'd be a thing they'd have to be

they'd have to fit right though because if you get a little every yeah well your pants always have to fit right white i mean kate you can attest to this white jeans are different they are different than every other color you got to have an extra special fit with white yes for uh like i don't know like a beach thing or like a like a like a tiki bar like a reason i'm not gonna wear like white pants white i don't know what it is about white jeans and white pants but it really does change like the the fit of them are so much more important than any other color i agree so i i bought a pair and then then I went home. I was going to wear them, and they didn't fit. They were too small. Like Casey said.

They were a 33, and I went back, and I exchanged them for a 34. And as I'm doing the exchange, the guy is like, wait, what? You're getting a 34? And I was kind of like, yeah, man. And he was like, why? They didn't fit? And I'm like, yeah, that's how this would work. And you don't know what my pants size are, so what's the problem?

And then he goes, I mean, I would have thought you're like a 31. Oh, Larry. And I was like, I could kiss you on the fucking lips, man. And that was actually you two in the subway in that video. Yeah. Right after that exchange. I haven't been a 31 since I was in like sixth grade. Really?

I'm like a 32. Yeah, no, 31 for me. That ship has sailed. I'm at the point now where it's like becoming irresponsible to wear the pants I'm wearing. And all my comments are like, are you wearing pajama jeans again? I'm like, no, they're just that type now. But I don't want to buy new jeans. Yeah, I have my fat jeans and I have my

three levels of jeans, basically. It depends on whether I'm in winter mode and fat mode or if I've lost a little bit of weight. It's like, oh, I've got to get my fat clothes out. It's been a bad run. Kate and I were at lunch today talking about how it's time for bulking

season. Winter's fast to coming, guys. It's now okay to start mixing in a milkshake or two at lunch. I have not stopped. I've been mixing them in the whole time. No, you went through a little phase where you're eating healthy. I did. I actually, once I saw that I was approaching two bills, I was like, it's time to stop this.

For sure. There was a while that you were eating just salmon. Yeah. Have you ever been two bills in your life? No. I was like high 190s and I was like, I can't have that. I don't have – I'm six feet tall, so 200 would be okay if I had any muscle. Yeah.

But I don't. So 200 on my frame is a disaster. And then I – yeah, then I cut out the carbs and shit like that. But I just needed to get back into the right ballpark, then I cut out the carbs and shit like that. But I just needed to, like, get back into, like, the right ballpark, and then I cut it loose again. You were literally eating entire to-go cartons of just fish for a while. You know what really fucked me is the move, because I really liked everything in Cafe 28. God, and Whole Foods. They have the same shit.

It's way better quality. Where is it? Like, 24th? Yeah. That's far. No, it's not. We're going there. You should come with us.

24th and what? 7th? It's not that far. It's not. And they have way better fish. If I. No, it's not. We're going there. You should come with us. 24th and what? 7th? It's not that far. It's not. And they have way better fish. If I walk there, it's not that far. But I won't go there without Casey. I've never gone there by myself.

You don't go anywhere by yourself. Not true. He went to Fleischman by himself. I know, but you were, like, scared. But I still went. Yeah. Put on my big boy pants. Because you knew.

I knew the deal. Because you knew you needed to please guys like Marshall. Marshall. Gets you to look under control. Fucking cock bad. He's been calling in frantically, trying to get back on air. Oh, God. I knew you need to please guys like Marshall Marshall look on under control cock back He's been calling in frantically trying to trying to get back on air Got rid of a long time ago, but all Zaha has spoken he's gone. He's not there Why would he call in to apologize?

Probably because he realized that he's a big meanie, Casey. A big old fat meanie. You call in a national radio show to roast somebody's look, and then you hang up, and you're like, damn, I just got dominated. I'm going to call up and apologize. You're even more of a bitch. At least stand by it. Yeah, at least stand by being a bitch. He probably expected me to defend myself, but I'm just saying I've never had long hair

before in my life, so i'm just trying it out it's also like i know that we are in a little bit of a uh public figure or whatever but it's like i don't know man i don't have like a stylist i'm not going for a look right i buy the fucking sneaker that i like and i i literally like i have hair so i grow it i don't want to be bald so i do that and i buy like blue shirts that's it i don't want to be bald so I do that and I buy blue shirts. That's it. I don't know what the fuck. It all started because I was shit-talking fights. When he was growing his hair out during the winter, I was like,

I'm going to grow my hair out. It's going to look better than yours. I was joking and then I just stopped getting haircuts and then I grew it out and I was like, this is kind of thick. It did grow faster. You had said you were like, it'll grow in a couple months. I was like, bro, no way. It's going to take a long time.

Your shit grows fast. Yeah, I basically stopped around. The last haircut that I got, the last buzz cut, was when I went home for Thanksgiving. I can see you with longer fight style hair where you take off the motorcycle helmet and run your hands through it. It flows out. I can see you with a serious fucking flow. Maybe I'll just go for the Stamos look.

I wouldn't mind that. Straight up Stamos. I'm not going to look like Stamos, but the hair. You just have to qualify that statement a little more. I would aspire to look like one one million of John Stamos. It's either Stamos or Bryce Harper I've been getting. But the Stamos, you have the dark hair, the dark features. There is some comparison.

But man, he's just a man. He's hotter now than he was then. I agree. He keeps getting hotter. Which is why it's great to be a guy. It's just great. It is great. It's so much better to be a guy.

I realized why because she didn't want me to cut my sides. And I was like, I don't know. And then I remembered why I want to cut my sides. It's because I have big time grays on the side. Oh, man. Nothing wrong with that. I'm all gray. Like, completely.

I get my hair dyed to cover it up. Like, I am completely. Are you really? Oh, my God. Yeah. I know because when I don't get it dyed for a while, it starts to come out the sides. I know I need it because everyone in the comment section is like, hey, bitch. You're gray as fuck.

I'm like, oh, thank you. That's right. You're the worst person on the planet. Time to go get my hair dyed. Time to go get my hair done. I'm getting shit on. You know. I'm like, oh, thank you. That's right. We're the worst people on the planet. Time to go get my hair done. Time to go get my hair done. I'm getting shit on. You know why I'm going gray? Because of fucking dickheads like you in the comments driving me fucking crazy.

Yeah. Let's hit a break. It's halftime here on CCK. When we come back, more calls. If you want to shit on Krabis, 833-85-STOOL. I'm here. We'll be back. I've got to address the homeless people outside.

Oh, it's bad. Full-blown shantytown. It's Hooverville. It's crazy. Casey, are you fucking high today? Yeah, you're giggling like crazy. You're still stoned from those bong hits. I don't know.

Fights gives me the church giggles a lot. You got high like on Tuesday, and you haven't shut the fuck up. I'm telling you, I haven't been that high in years. It was so bad. Speaking of high, these guys are just doing heroin downstairs. Right outside our office, there was Tuesday. They lay out these cardboard boxes, and they have a little mat. And there was a bouquet of flowers.

And they had a tray of pastries. And there was two of them. Sounds like they're about to fuck and then today yeah there's probably i i i give it you laid down a map without some flowers and get a donut and today laid my friend today jt was playing they had a little uh i don't know what they were playing it on you know it's homeless like what electronics do you guys have but they're they were playing like something from the 2020 experience and it was like four of them so So they're growing in size. They've got food. They've got decorations.

They've got music. They're throwing a party. I'm sure there's some heroin. I'm sure there's some fucking drugs. Yeah, there's not a party without heroin. Oh, there was one guy who like, he had like his legs were covered in like bruises and weird shit and he was passed out.

You know, there's like the levels to this homeless shit. There's people who are happy and singing and dancing, and there are guys on their deathbed. And they are right outside our office. It's not like, oh, they're on the same block. It's like they're sharing the door. It is something special. I don't know if this happens to you guys, but black people find it necessary for some reason

to acknowledge each other's presence. So each and every single time that I go outside, them motherfuckers always try to talk to me. So I don't know if that happens to anyone else here or if that was just me and Willie. I have to deal with that nonsense every day. Them motherfuckers trying to talk to me. Do you talk back to them?

Hell no. I didn't think so. I didn't know. I don't know. I didn't want to deal with that message every day. Them motherfuckers trying to talk to me. Do you talk back to him? Hell no. I didn't think so. I didn't know. Hell no. I didn't want to speak like that. I love the notion. I love the notion because I know what you're talking about. You know, like they give Zal the knowing smile and they're kind of like, yeah, what's up,

my brother? And Zal's like, get the fuck away from me. I don't give a shit if we're both black. You're disgusting. You're black, but you're homeless and gross and high on heroin. Get away from me. That should be a little scene in a sitcom. Like, Zah walks outside and someone's like, peace, my brother.

And he's like, get the fuck out of here. It sounds like a Curb Your Enthusiasm. Yeah, oh, that's great, Zah. Fuck that. They are. I mean, I don't know what you can do. I feel like it's like someone from the building's job. Like, usually, like, the landlord, whoever, would be, like, moving along, you know?

You got to get Giuliani on the horn. de Blasio just let these fucking guys run the town over, man. Giuliani would have had him fucking killed by now. Giuliani would just round him up. Giuliani would have drowned him in the Hudson fucking weeks ago. Giuliani rounds him up. He ties bricks to their feet, throws them in the river. That's all he does.

There's an island off the coast of, off the coast of, it's like next to City Island in the Bronx. I was going to say, where are we going with this? Are we staying local?

Because if we are, you used the wrong phrase. It's just like right, it's like in between Long Island and City Island. And that's where they bury all the John Does, like all the dead people

who they don't know who they are. Like the homeless people? Yeah, they just like if you can't identify them and you don't have any ID and you don't have any family they just bring them to this island

and bury them. What? That's so sad. I didn't know that. Do they have tombstones or anything? Yeah, there's like little like blank

You gotta cremate them. Yeah, you have to. You can't go around just fucking making a ghost island. That's exactly what it is. Is it Potter's Field or Heart Island? I don't like that at all. Yes, Potter's Field. You can't go around just fucking making a ghost island. That's exactly what it is. Is it Potter's Field or Heart Island? I don't like that at all.

Yes, Potter's Field. Isn't it? It has to be cheaper to cremate somebody than bury them. I would guess, yeah. So what are we doing? Why is that happening? I'm not sure. I mean, I guess.

It's not like they have something in their wallet, like, please bury me. If you think. Yeah, I would imagine just fucking tossing them in the oven is a lot easier but maybe not maybe like running one of those giant like i think it's just we're just talking fucking just conserving space yeah we're running out of running out of earth here what if one day we need that island well it'll probably be gone soon but the you know i go start building a foundation for my house and i I got to get through a lot of bone. That's too much.

I don't think they're building houses on this island, are they? Well, what if you did? What if I decide I wanted to buy Potter's Field Island? I got to deal with a bunch of dead bodies? So Potter's Field is just in general where you bury people you don't know who the fuck they are. Heart Island is the big Potter's Field for around here. Oh, yeah, that makes sense. And it says there are more than 1,500 burials per year.

It was founded in 1994. It has assisted families. It was founded. What do you mean it was founded? You just fucking buried people in the ground. By the way, imagine that job. That means that you've got to probably throw these bodies on a ferry and bring them over to this island.

That's creepy as shit, man. And you know they're not getting like a nice coffin because funeral homes, they're not going to give out that shit. I'm surprised they're not getting a coffin. That's what I'm saying. They probably are. They probably just wrap them in a bag, you know. Oh, my goodness.

Do one of those like, you know those things on the, like as seen on TV, the suction things? You think they're getting individual holes? No, I bet you just throw them in a big hole I would imagine yeah it's a great it's a great like plot and place for like a horror movie I think it would be so like is there anything else on this island nope it's uh look you can see it's that guy right there so that's that whole island is dead people that island is where I was born. Yeah.

And then that island is the dead people island. Let's go out there one night and just sleep on tent. No. I'll go. I'll come back when it gets light outside. All right, Nick Cage. When you were growing up, did you ever try to get over there somehow? I never did, but it definitely was more than 1 million people are buried there.

Oh, let's go do a night. They do 1,500 per year. Can we do that? Can we just go get a tent? One-third of annual burials. Oh, man, this is so dark. Oh, no. One-third of annual burials are infants and stillborn babies.

How are those John Does? Holy shit. You know who they just came out of there were 1400 burials 826 adults 546 infants and 47 burials of dismembered body parts so it's just like ah I don't know we found a leg

over here on the 6 train like throw it in Hearts Island shut the fuck up is that not the creepiest shit in the world? I don't like this at all. Oh, my God. Listen, we just met our friend Logan Paul. Let's take a little page out of his book.

We'll go do a little vlog over in Hearts Island and find ourselves some dead babies. I'm in. No, that's so creepy. I'm not doing that. I can't imagine how that would go wrong. It's notable burials. Let's see.

How are they notable? How do you have a notable burial? Yeah, how are they notable if you don't know who they are? Well, I think it's notable burials. Let's see. How are they notable? How do you have a notable burial? Yeah, how are they notable if you don't know who they are? Well, I think it's for John Does or people who can't, like, afford it. But how is it notable? Yeah, if you can't afford it, guess what? Many of the dead either had families who could not afford the expenses or were not claimed by relatives within the month of death.

You only get a month? So let's say you die, John. I mean, a month is a long time, John. Let's say you didn't have any family, right? And you die, and someone calls up, and they're like, John Feidelberg's dead. You're going to come claim him. I could see myself being like, all right, I'll do it next week.

I got caught up. I'll do it next week. And then all of a sudden, it's like down to the wire, and I'm like, ah, missed the deadline. John's dead, and he's gone. But how would they even know? If you're a John Doe, how would they know your name to even call somebody? They're not always John Doe.

They might just not have any family. So they call me and I don't give a fuck. I would care. They call me, I'll come. I did a video. Don't. Don't. I want to go up there.

Some famous playwright, Leo Bruniski. He died alone and in poverty. He was buried there. American novelist, Dawn Powell. Five years after her death, when the executor of her will estate ran out of breath. Five years? And Academy Award winner Bobby Driscoll. He was buried because his remains could not be identified in a timely fashion.

So this is just laziness. Yeah. Creepy spot, though. Let's hit a break. When we come back, we'll talk a little more about Dead Islands. Dead people on islands. The most fucked up thing that just happened right there in that whole conversation was when you said JT, my dick did a hiccup because it's my boner song.

Anytime I don't mention JT, my dick hurts. Wait, stop. Can we go out with a different song? Can you play Ayo Technology? So in case people don't know, many, many years ago we did boner jams on KFC Radio. If you had one song, every time your dick got hard, if this song came on, what song would you like? And I don't even remember me and Dan's, but John's stuck. A.O. Technology is his.

And now it actually works. Whenever someone mentions Justin Timberlake, it's as gay as it gets. Whenever someone mentions Justin Timberlake's name, my dick goes, what'd you say? I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what. Do you know what's gayer than that? When I hear Justin Timberlake, I think about your dick.

I'm sad that now every time I hear Justin Timberlake, I'm going to think about... I'm just thinking about John's penis. I'm reading more about Hearts Island. Before the break, we were talking about this creepy haunted island in the Bronx with all these dead bodies buried. It says that they allow 50 to 70 visitors per year. So I don't know how many... Brandon, get this motherfucker on that list.

I mean, I'm down. I would definitely go up there. I'll do it. What's the worst that happens? We get killed by a ghost? Yes, that would be the worst that happens. I mean, we're the first people ever successfully murdered by a ghost. Ghosts have a track record like fucking Aaron Rodgers.

Who they've been killing. I think I want to do it just because, you know, we grew up there. I've always heard of it. I'll go. You just take like a boat out there? I want you guys to go to parties and bars and you want to go to Death Island. Yeah. This surprises you, Brandon?

Have you been listening to this podcast for seven years? Parties and bars. We're just going to do fun things. Fuck that. Take me to a dead island. What would you do on the Death Island? Camp out. Call spirits. Play Ouija boards. I was going to say Ouija. Do you think they let you stay the night? No.

I don't fucking... Get me on that island and then find me. I'll fucking run off into the woods. It looks like kind of a big island. I will not be alone. You'll have to stay by my side. Yeah. Can I go? No. No. What kind of ridiculous question is that? Girls can't go on these things. Girls are not good in these situations. No girls

do you RLZ. You would absolutely ruin hard island trip. No, I wouldn't. Yeah, you'd be-R-L-Z. You would absolutely ruin Heart Island trip. No, I wouldn't. Yeah, you'd be such a girl. You'd be like, it's cold and scary. It's like, that's the point, bitch. Casey can come, but we kill her. Yeah, you don't come home.

One of you has to stay. We chop your limbs off. And then we eat you a little bit first. So wait, you guys want to be cannibals on my dead body? Uh-huh. That's the only way I can go? Uh-huh. I'm going to do it for content.

Greg from Ohio, what do you got on dead bodies? Hey, I just had a few quick stats for you guys. I got a bunch of family friends that own funeral homes. It's way, way cheaper to cremate because they keep that oven going basically all the time because it has to get so hot. But the reason they don't do that is in case someone shows up down the line claiming to be a relative, they have to be able to overturn that. And then, KFC, real quick for you, what the hell is up with heavy legs?

Can't you just say they arrest? Unbelievable. Mets bingo. Another added to the fucking list today. Jeff McNeil just came off of his gotta believe appearance out today with heavy legs. That's awesome.

I love that. What in the world does that mean? Can't you just say tired? He's tired. Can't you just say soreness? This is, again, I need to just become the Mets public relations manager.

I could tell you that heavy legs, you're going to be the butt of everyone's joke. Just say tired. Just say sore. Just say needs a day. Yeah. Say sick. I don't think you have to give a reason, do you? Heavy fucking legs.

I think usually something you do, but there's a million ways that you can. I think usually you can just say rest in baseball. Oh, yeah. He's got a day off. He's done. He's resting. Heavy fucking legs. He was unbelievable on Gotta Believe.

He's just, the guys who can play both sports like that and just kind of fall into careers, they're just incredible. He's the anti-Brooks Kepa. He's the opposite. He went from golf to baseball when Brooks went from baseball to golf. Fuck both of them. I like heavy legs. I'm going to start doing that shit.

I'm not coming to work on heavy legs today. I'm out on the podcast today. Heavy legs. John from Atlanta. Dead bodies. Go. Yeah. So I know this because my dad's a funeral director.

Wait, wait, wait. Pause, pause, pause. Pause, pause. Stop. So you're like in that show Six Feet Under. Your family is in the funeral director business. Are you going to carry on the family name? Is your dad a weirdo? And is there any weird stigma attached to the fact that you're just around dead bodies all the time?

Yeah, man. I dip all my joints in formaldehyde like they did in the show uh no um no everybody always asks if it's like my girl where the shit's in our in our health basement that's uh it's not the case and uh i'd like to say my dad's not a weirdo people in the funeral business actually tend to be just pretty happy because they they see a lot of shit and kind of understand you know what's going on and their job is that to more or less help the family okay um but yeah it's a little fucked up um not gonna lie yeah um but the crazy thing about this death island like you know they have they have caskets for for the ind people. They're basically like a church shop cardboard box.

But if you don't bury a body in a vault, you run the risk of if that island were to flood, all those caskets come floating up to the fucking surface. That's what's creepy. Yeah. Yeah. There's a cemetery that is on City Island, which is just a normal cemetery for normal people, is full. Like, there's no more spots. And they started to, like, kind of pack them in.

And it's right on the water. It's like a tiny little island. The hurricanes have been coming up more and more recently. Like, there's a chance that, you know, it's going to be a scene out of a fucking

deep, dark horror movie. I don't know why I'm so into this. I didn't used to be into this kind of stuff, but I've just been... All day, I've been like, you know what? Fuck with this. I didn't used to be into this kind of stuff, but I've just been all day. I've been like, you know what? Fuck with this.

Mike from Cali, Death Island. First off, fights, 100%, mirrors, best Justin Timberlake song of all time. That's just a bad take. I'm sorry, KFC. What do you guys think? You said they're going to, you know, we need room for, it takes up too much room to bury all these people. What do you think they do with horses?

Do they bury them, or do they still sit under the glue factory? Those guys get burned out for sure. How do they even have a cremation machine big enough for a horse? Maybe they just hit it with a flamethrower. Yeah, they just light the room on fire. Yeah, they just put you in a brick room. I mean, they don't bury horses, do they? Are we burying horses?

No, because like the last guy said, the only reason you're doing it with humans is because you might want to claim them eventually. Yeah. A horse doesn't matter. You're burning those fucking animals. Do you think high profile horses get buried? They might get stuffed.

I bet you secretaries are stuffed. You can bury it on your own fucking property if you want, but there's not a horse cemetery. Burying a horse is going to be hard. Is a pet cemetery a real thing or is that just a movie? I bet you that's a thing. I bet you that's a real thing. People are so weird with pets that I bet... There's definitely somewhere where you can bury your dog.

Has to be. Yeah. I mean, I'm sure there are people who probably spend more on... Dog burials. Yeah. Why is pet cemetery spelled with an S? Don't know. Is that some sort of horror movie play on words sort of thing?

There's a new one out. There's a new Pet Sematary. It bombs terribly. Yeah. I think someone was in it who's a good actor, too. I think... What's his name's in it? Fucking Jason Clarke?

Would he be in it? I don't think Jason Clarke's ever turned down a movie. Dude's a fucking great actor, and he sometimes ends up in the weirdest roles. Jason Clarke, you're the fucking man. That guy is in a lot. I know a guy who looks exactly like him, too. John Lithgow's in it. That's about it.

When did that come out? I don't even remember that coming out. 2019, yeah. It's already on demand. I think it was one of those, like, let's just skip right to it. When you make a movie that stinks, like you've got to know, right? I mean, that like it had no buzz. It had no press, no interviews.

They didn't do any podcast appearances. And then it goes right to DVD. But it's like the Medellin effect. It's like they all thought it was bad, but then they still put it out thinking it might end up being good. It's like a cult classic sort of thing. Yeah, and that went straight to DVD. Medellin? Yeah, it went straight to DVD. Medellin? Yeah, it went straight to DVD.

It's also not real. Wait, Medellin? We're also talking about fictional movies. God damn it, Casey. I'm talking about Entourage. I know. You thought I was talking about a real movie called Medellin? I thought for a second.

I spaced out. I mean, that's a movie that if somebody makes, that generation of people will go see it. For sure. If Adrian Grenier made Medellin, people would watch it. I've been saying that since that season. I was like, they should actually just make the movie. And if he was Aquaman, they would have done better.

Also true. Aquaman did well, didn't it? Wasn't Aquaman the first DC movie that people were like, oh, maybe DC doesn't know how to make movies? I still haven't seen it. DC was decent. I want to see Queens Boulevard, too. Yeah. I mean, all those movies, just make them like an hour and 10 minutes long.

Make it an episode of TV, to be honest. And people will watch it, I guarantee you. The one that he- It'll be good. It'll be trash, but we'll watch it. The one that he did in the movie where he was like a DJ that has all those- Yeah. That would have been sick.

Yeah. Yeah. That scene where it's almost like a a is it a vampire thing as well? Is it like a blade thing? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like partying and like the and he like throws out

the drug, yeah. Yeah, great, great stuff. I want to see that one too. Marshall Ali signing up as Blade. Are you a Blade guy? Oh, yeah. You like Blade?

You cock juggling thunder cunt. One of the best insults in cinema history. Is that the old white guy says that? Yeah, Ryan Reynolds says that. Oh, I forgot he's in that.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was like what, Blade 3? Just to hear that. I think that was the third one, yeah. It was Jessica Biel, him, and Blade. At the time, I didn't realize that Blade was like a Marvel superhero. I would never think of Blade along the same lines as Captain America and Iron Man.

But he is in that same universe. I love that Mahershala Ali is is in that same universe. When that... I love that Mahershala Ali is already in the Marvel Universe. No, who is he? He was Cottonmouth in Luke Cage. He's like the bad guy in Luke Cage. That's just, I mean, come on. Like, flat out, that doesn't count.

Yeah, yeah. I mean, it clearly doesn't. He's like, eh, he's gonna do Blade 2. Somebody was tweeting, like, this is how you can tell they don't care anymore. Yeah, it was separate law. Shut the fuck up. No, I don't think he was saying it like in a negative thing.

I think he was just like, this is proof positive that Kevin Feige, I think is how his name's pronounced, I'm not sure, but it's like, proof that he just, you know,

he just doesn't give a shit about TV shows. It didn't seem like he was like negative, just like, he does not, you can do whatever the fuck you want on TV,

it does not affect his Marvel cinematic universe. Right, no one's gonna be like, same thing with, what's his face, plays Thanos and Deadpool, right? Oh, right.

Yeah, Jeff Bridges. Not Jeff Bridges. Fucking... God damn it. Josh Brolin. Josh Brolin, yes. Like, it just... It's okay.

It's not a big deal. Who is... Jeff Bridges is just Josh Brolin from the future. Yes. Those guys are like... If they're not related, they are related.

They don't know it, but they are. Anyway, back to Death Island. We're going to go to Hearts Island? Yeah. Can I please go? No. You are a girl.

Why do you want to go? No girls allowed. Go do girly things. Yeah. The shark is on the TV. He has the sparklers and the bottles and the girls. He's standing up on the booth. He's like sitting up on top, you know, like, you know, the king of the world.

Realizes that he's with a co-worker who it's her birthday. I think he knew it going into it, but yes. Tells her like, no, no, it's like it's your birthday too. Like, yeah, I'm here. I got the table, but like it's for your birthday. And then tries to take credit for the boyfriend. Hank said he saw the bottles come out with Barcelona outdoors. It was like, fuck, I probably got to take credit for the boyfriend hank said he saw the bottles come out with barcelona outdoors it was like fuck i probably gotta get something for ria so he got

one and apparently yp just acted like it was him to say i told you like to you know like if you just let if you just let people maybe think that and you just kind of like let it skirt like fine but to actively send a text message after the fact and say, I told you I was going to take care of you. Rhea, when Rhea heard that Hank bought it, Rhea was shocked. She's like, wait, you paid for that? Which is funny because it's like, of course, a girl's boyfriend paid for it. That all makes sense. And the only thing that's weird is this other guy trying to

take credit for it. I just keep looking behind me waiting to see why Pete He's going to come storming in and be like, bro, bro, bro, bro, that is not,

no, no. And then John, you're going to like laugh and he's going to be like, would you just shut the fuck up for one second?

Would you just fucking let me explain it for one fucking second? Definitely going to happen. Would you just shut the fuck up,

John? John, John, you always fucking do this. You're such a fucking loser, buddy. Why don Would you just shut the fuck up, John? John, John, you always fucking do this. You're such a fucking loser, buddy. Why don't you just get him in here? I mean, we might as well. We'll take a couple calls here on the homeless because there's a bunch of them while we wait for YP. Jimbo from Connecticut, what do you got on the homeless?

Would you rather, I got a hypothetical. Would you rather Give a homeless person $25 once a week For the rest of your life Or have sex with a homeless man Or a woman For Three times a year

I mean come on $25 What are you talking about Yeah You would have to make that number Be like You know $1,000 a week

Before I'd even consider Having sex with a homeless person $25 No fucking problem bro Having sex with a homeless person has got to be the worst thing that you can do. $25? I mean, we're talking literally $100 a month

to give a homeless person? No. Sure. But where would the breaking point be? If you had to give a homeless person $5,000 a month. $5,000 a month? Not a month. A year. A year. Oh, $5,000 a year. $5,000 a month. $5,000 a month. Not a month. A year. Oh, $5,000 a year.

Done. $5,000 a year? $10,000 a year. Three times is a lot of sex. Yeah. $10,000 is a lot though. Three times a year is more sex than I have with regular people. And that's too much sex.

I've had sex with three people this year. Fuck. I've had sex with three homeless people. I don't know if they'd even want to. Like, I think my, my saving grace would be

my, my looking like John Candy. Like, yeah, I'm good, man. I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna let you sell yourself that short.

The homeless would fuck you. The homeless would definitely fuck you. The homeless would fuck you. Like, you have had some people have sex with you, so. Darren from Wisconsin, what do you got?

Oh, here he comes. Wait, hang on. Sorry, Darren. Hang on. You can just hang on for a second. YP's in the building. There he is. Mr. Barstool Outdoors is in the building.

I feel like I heard you had yourself a big night at Bounce last night. Turn my mic up. Turn my mic up. Turn my mic up. First of all, what is this look, John? What's wrong? I'm in there working on something, cutting this social club up. They're like, yo, Fodderberg's talking shit about me. I also like how he says Fodderberg. I said that, no, this is all going to be my fault.

No, I just, I mean, that's what they told me. They're like, Fodderberg's dragging your name, like, this is all going to be my fault. Yep. No, I just, I mean, that's what they told me. They're like, Feinberg's dragging your name, like all this stuff. It's like, I'm like, okay, let me get up. Let me come. What, John? What? So last night you get a table at Bounce. We got the bottles, the sparklers, the Barcelona Outdoors logo,

like basically like a launch party for Barcelona Outdoors. Shout out to my friend Grinnell. He set up for me. The guy that's like, I don't know, you call promoter or something. He reached like, you know, he's like always good to us. Nice dude. Yep. know he set up for me the guy that's uh like i don't know you call promoter or something he reached like you know he's like always good to us nice dude yep reached out was like you know we got like if you want to come through whatever we've been meaning to do it for a while anyways shit took two fucking years to put out and i told logan like he's over there slaving away grinding

away on these edits everything so last weekend was my sister's wedding, and I was in Memphis, and I was like, bro, when we finally put this shit out, after two years, whatever, we're gonna go have a night and rip it up. And so last weekend we couldn't. It was my sister's wedding. I was gone Thursday night.

So we went to the thing, and the guy was like, oh, like, we should put this... I mean, they put a graphic on the screens. What, you know, like... So that all goes down, and then Bottles and Shit and Sparklers also come out for Rhea for her birthday. Yeah.

And then you texted Rhea saying, like, I got you. Like, I told you I would. What was the text? Okay. So here's what happened. On the other day. This is like one of those things where I can tell something's been misconstrued. You guys are, like, giggling at me.

And it's like, I know I'm not in the wrong. So it's like, this is when I want to kill you, Foddered. You guys are like giggling at me and it's like, I know I'm not in the wrong. So it's like this one. I want to kill you, Fodderberg, because you have this dumb fucking stupid look. No, get this like cocky look off your face. What is it? He just so he's so like arrogant. It's like, dude, I know I didn't do anything wrong. So shut the fuck up, John.

So dumb. But anyways, I hate you, dude. So so anyways no so the other day exactly this was gonna happen when you said we're gonna say these words so last week when we originally talked about it i was like because ria's like i think she came to me last time like i've only gone like three times in my life so it's like oh it's like an event so ria's like yo that's my birthday at midnight this was like last week and i was like oh like that's sick like we have to go now whatever like when we originally thought of it right so she's like you think they'll like write like happy birthday Rhea or something I was like I'll get you a sign like I promise like not even a question because I knew

this guy was like hooking us up separately I was like how hard is that to get them to like say that or like put a sign up she was like i bet you 50 bucks that you can't do it fran was there in case so get your look off your like everyone was there nobody will corroborate i was like bro i bet you 50 bucks i can get a sign for your birth like it's not that crazy it's not like we're at like you know like something right like a drake concert, I don't know if he could do it. I know, like, this, I could get you a sign for your birthday. Okay. So then last night, Monday, which Grinnelli, like, I don't even know why this is coming up right now, but Grinnelli just tried to say that he did it.

So I pulled up my text with the guy. Let me find it right now. Nice dude. Love him. And when we originally thought about it. Meaning the guy from Bounce. Yeah, the guy who's like hooking it up and i was like oh like uh uh fran a real friend are coming it's ria's birthday at midnight

she bet me that i couldn't get her a sign at midnight saying happy birthday do you think we can this was monday at 12 41 p.m right so like after we had kind of talked about it he goes you're crazy if you think she's just getting a sign like let's make this a big thing invite whoever like whatever like so then when the sign came out i'd send her a screenshot of the thing and i was like i sent the money emoji like 50 bucks so in this story so someone tell me where fidelberg is giggling with this fucking face and all you guys think you've got me and all this stuff. The reason all that came out was because Hank paid for it. Hank bought bottles and shit for Rhea. Hank paid for the sign and everything.

When Hank saw your shit come out, he was like, oh, fuck, it's Rhea's birthday. Like, all the attention is, like, YP's doing this whole thing. I got to get something for my girl, too. So he bought bottles and shit. I don't understand the part where I texted the guy on Monday and he's like, oh, we'll get her a sign, whatever. Well, I think you. I Monday and he's like, oh, we'll get her a sign, whatever. Well, I think. I mean, that's my only involvement. I don't know how I like get get like shot at.

Well, when someone else pays for all that stuff. We we bought bottles, too. They bought theirs came out for her at midnight. Like, I don't even understand what. Well, it's all I said. She said you won't get a sign. I texted the guy. Yo, can we get her?

I think the sign ended up coming out because Hank paid for it is what I'm saying. So you don't think if there was a thing when the guy goes, oh, we'll get her a sign. I don't even know what we're arguing. Well, okay. That's not my girlfriend. I wrote a text to the guy and was like, yo, Rhea's coming. It's her birthday at midnight. She bet me I couldn't get a sign.

He said, oh, you're crazy if you think she's just getting a sign. That was his text to me. I think that probably there's just a little mix-up where that guy said he was going to do all that, but then Hank ended up paying for everything. I mean, the guy was there last night, and he's like, oh, we're taking care of whatever you want. But I think he's saying, I mean, eventually they want money. You know what I mean? You think Hank is the only one who paid money?

No, no, no. Hank paid for Rhea's part of it. Okay. I mean, I don't know what's going on. All right,'s part of it okay i mean that's all it's just funny all right all right whatever it's fine let's just move on i feel like i'm trying to get gotcha here and i didn't even it's funny when you're like i got you i hooked you up and then it's like the guy's boyfriend's like no he didn't i was like yp got me a sign and hank was like what i got you a fucking sign and and friend was like yeah i saw hank but given all of the evidence of her telling

me about it last week you won't get a sign i was like then me texting I saw Hank's track. But given all of the evidence of her telling me about it last week, you won't get a sign. I was like, then me texting the guy. I feel like that's why she said that. Right. And that's why I didn't know. I don't know who fucking who when they did the bottles that they did. I didn't like pay for those for them to bring out my sign. That was just like part of the thing that the guy was throwing.

Yeah, I think it was probably after the text messages you had. You thought that he brought it out for you. But I think it was more that he brought it out because Hank paid for it. I think whether they bought bottles or not, after his text me being like, oh, we'll get her a sign, to me that seemed like it was happening no matter what. But who knows? How was the launch party? It wasn't even really like that, honestly. It was a good time. Me and Logan, I was like, bro, we're going to go rip it up.

Just whoever wanted to come, come. Fucking Chef Donnie was there. I couldn't come. like that, honestly. It was like me and Logan. I was like, bro, like, we're going to go rip it up. Just whoever wanted to come, come fucking. Chef Donnie was there. I couldn't come. Office manager, bro. I was explicitly not invited. You were not invited because you're a fucking, because you just keep running your mouth at me all the time. We were talking about that. And I don't remember what day it was, but that's why I was.

I think we need to fight over a YP rough and round. Just get this out. No, I'm not trying to box you. This dude's good at fighting. I know that for a fact. But I'd do like a hundred wrestling match in a row, like overall cumulative. Like maybe I win 51 to 40. Who knows? Because he gets tired.

Yeah, if we hit 100 in a row. That's what I'm saying. I'll do two in a row. Go 50-50 with it. I may need more than that. I may have to stretch this out. Seven game series, like three of those. Yeah, like YP's in it for the long haul.

Like he'll lose like the first 25, but then he'll win the next 25 because you're gassed. Bro, I won't lose the first 25. No, we have a very even. Probably 60-40, but it's not. No, they're even. Yeah, let's slow down on that. I'm just saying, listen, here's the thing of the day. I don't know, Hank.

How am I running my mouth? I don't know, but now that you say no, no, no. I'm not sure, listen, here's the end of the day. And I don't know, Hank. How am I running my mouth? I don't know. But now that you say. I don't know what you are. I'm not sure, but you definitely are. Now that you say I was specifically uninvited, I remember we were at our desk and you kept saying shit to me. And you're, yeah, I'm not even going to bring it up because it will encourage it. You keep doing your little whisper thing.

And I said, you know what, Fidelberg, I'm fucking, don't come. Like, fuck you, dude. And it wasn't like I was actually serious, but it was like, yeah, I don't want to see your dumb face laughing at me. Because this is the type of, and this is why. And Kevin, I'm not mad at you. Can't say I'm not mad at you. Just like, I come in here. Guess what?

I mean, you better not be. Guess what? No, no, but it's like, I'm not trying to be snippy, but it's like, bro, guess what my involvement was? We're sitting at the desk. Rhea's like, yo, I bet I could get a, like, you won't get a sign. I was like, oh, I bet you 50 bucks I can. I text the dude. I see a sign.

I screenshot. I'm like, oh, 50 bucks. Like, bro, I don't know. I spent about 36 seconds on it total. You know what I mean? So then people are trying to make like, oh, you thought you did it. Hank did it. I'm like, bro, it's not all that.

I thought it was a funny thing. But you understand that it did look like it was for Rhea's birthday last night, but it wasn't. Like, she was like an afterthought for that thing last night. It was any single thing that we've talked about the whole time. I wish Maria was in here. I mean, she told me today it was not for her birthday. The whole thing. It was like, yo, at midnight, we're going to go crazy, like, for your birthday.

That was a fact. Every single person there was like, Rhea, happy birthday. Well, yeah, but it wasn't, the party wasn't thrown for Rhea's birthday. The party wasn't really thrown for anything. It was like, and then they're like, do you want the logo? I'm like, yeah, that'd be sick if you put the fucking Outdoors logo on the screen at the club. That would be awesome. Was it like a red carpet event premiering something?

No, it was just like, let's go rip it up. And it's also like one of those things, too, where after a while, i think like logan all you know what i mean i was like rudy all the people that we had like been doing on the like yeah it's like a over time i was like bro celebration yeah because guess what that shit took me forever as you know fucking the same kfz radio listeners that are like february where was february pussy? It's like, yeah, it did take a long time. So I'm excited. And it was a happy thing. You earned it, babe.

That's all. And listen, happy birthday, Rhea. Happy birthday. Everyone at Bounce, love you guys. You know, I have all positive energy right now. Nothing. Hank, thanks for paying for the bottles and making it a special occasion for Rhea. I hope everyone had a great time.

So I got no hate in my heart. Except for this. Yeah, I was about to say. Because he just. I hope everyone had a great time. So I got no hate in my heart. Except for this. Yeah, I was about to say. Because he just got this look on his face, man. It's like he thinks he knows something I don't. It's like, bro, this is all that it was. I heard that story this morning. We were all sitting around.

I thought it was funny. And you thought, oh, YP's such an idiot. That's what you thought. We were all laughing. I wasn't going to bring up Casey. Who told you the story? No, it wasn't even like a story. Rhea was just saying that you got a thing, and Hank's reaction was very funny.

And we were just laughing about that. In my point of view, how the fuck do we know? Yeah, your point of view is fine. It's not like I saw Hank and I was like, yo, I got to come up. Like, I'm going to say I did that. I agree. Right. Listen, man.

Great times, great people. Hope everyone just has a great day. You know what I mean? At the end of the day. But, like, looking like, all right, man. Great times, great people. Hope everyone just has a great day. You know what I mean at the end of the day? But, like, looking like – all right, whatever. I'm not even going to do it because it's – he's giving me a look. I'm laughing at you looking at him because right before you came in, he did verbatim say you were going to say this. That is why I lost it. That's what I was laughing at.

Right before you came in, you were exactly acting. No, but Zah also also he comes in with this look and I just know you're up to something where you think I'm an idiot and I'm just like I know I'm not because I know when I'm an idiot there's times when I'm like oh yeah yeah yeah I'm an idiot

this is one it's like bro I didn't do anything so I know this look he thinks I'm an idiot it makes me mad it wasn't my idea to get you. But from my point of view, it's like he goes, Fidelberg's dragging your name. I'm like, of course he is. It was my idea because Kevin was talking about the John Mayer concert,

and he was like, yeah, and then Rhea and Fran left to go to Rhea's birthday party, and I said it wasn't Rhea's birthday party. Honestly, there was no invitations. It was like, yo, it's your birthday. We're going out anyways for this exciting occasion. We'll just go have fun. It really wasn't. The guys was in the mix.

Pop that. You know what I mean? French Montana. Oh, yeah. Everybody. Listen. Kevin, hey. What about French Montana?

Everyone. Yeah. French Montana. Pop that. Guys' favorite song. Oh, I thought French Montana was here. I'll tell you this. Just low key.

No, no, no. He wasn't there. Oh, I would have been very excited. Let me tell you this, man. I don't know how many times it's happened. Handful that I've been lucky enough to see Paul Golchinski in a loud music setting when Pop That comes on. It never lets down. What did he do this time?

Say more bottles? No, no, no. Nothing great. Like, honestly, and I've been one on Twitter during the Bruins shit, like saying, you know, mean things that I'm not going to say right now because we're having a good time last night. But, you know, old people party and things. You remember I said mean shit, whatever. Very, very respectable turn up last night. No spraying.

No, you know, straight wharf shit like that. Very fun. Just like that. But his energy when it comes on, it's unmatched. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. I mean, that's unmatched. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah. I mean, that's what gives him life. It's like when I catch a shark and I'm clinging to my veins.

And it's just strictly because of that one fucking line. You know what I mean? Yes. If that line wasn't in it, it wouldn't be at the Patriot stuff, which, you know what I mean? Yes. And it was like Hank, all them, they just... It's like the Red Sea parts when that line comes on. Everyone just loses.

And it's like, it's a moment. I know. I hate that fucking song because of it. But it does get the people going. Is that fucking song because of it but it does i'll tell you what i saw oh that's the break that's the break i was like this isn't pop that but zai you got a lot of practice in with the music video shoot the other day you'll be fine casey's so salty her her uh her scene got cut no no my scene got high for nothing oh yeah ben's back there right no no i thought yeah yeah buddha why did you cut uh case, no, my scene didn't get cut. Oh, yeah, Ben's back there, right? No, no, I talked, yeah.

Yeah, Buddha, why did you cut Casey's bong scene? She told everyone how high she was, and then it was like the greatest. Oh, I didn't tell you. You saw my scene. Yeah, we could see. I didn't tell anybody. I just sat down. It was the performance of a lifetime. You see the shots in there of you hitting it on the camera, or Zah's phone camera. Yeah, I saw that part.

It looked more just like real I felt like when I had it in like the slow-mo it looked more like like stage yeah

like him getting it with the cell phone camera it looked more like she was so fine raw like she was super stoned we hit it like four times in the shot

yeah it was it was a good time you good but there's a reason on like movie sets

and TV shows they're not drinking. They don't do it real. Yeah. By the way. You got to do it a couple times. Next time you get beer and I say no, just don't listen to me. Just yet. It tastes.

You came in with two like frosty cold ice butt lights. I was like, why did I say no to that? Kevin, it tastes really good. Yeah, I'm sure. That was stupid. Just next time be like, okay, yeah, no. No, you don't want one. It's kind of like if I go back there and there's pizza, I'm like, Kevin's going to want pizza.

Yeah, you should just know I'm a fat drunk. I'll drink this really fast and then I'll go get some. I got my car and I was like, well, I'm going to get home and then start drinking before I start. Because if I start, I can't stop. And then, I don't know. Because I have alcoholism. You know, big old problem. I'm probably getting in trouble for that.

Jared from Boston. Not the Rocket, though. What's up, Jared? No, not the Rocket. I'm actually from New York. But, Kevin, I feel with you. I'm a Mets, Jets, Knicks fan. And there's nothing worse.

The only thing worse than that, honestly, is being a Mets, Jets, Knicks fan in Boston. Yeah, that's pretty tough. I don't think it's nothing worse. The only thing worse than that honestly is being a Mets, Jets, Knicks fan in Boston. Yeah, that's pretty tough. I don't think it's that bad. I disagree. Because guess what? If I met you in a bar and you're like, I'm a Mets, Jets, Knicks, I'd be like, yeah, that's things. Yeah, like people in Boston hate Yankee fans and give more of a hard time to Yankee fans

than Mets fans. If I talk to you in a bar, I'd be like, ah, man, that sucks. I wouldn't rub it in. You insult yourself more than I ever could. Why would you rub it in, though? You don't have any reason to. He would not rub it in. I'm assuming that you're saying it sucks to live there because you have to watch everyone around you winning,

and you know you're never going to. I see. It's not like you are going to say anything. Every year, I get hyped up for every sports season, and then every year we're out in like a month. Yeah, and everybody around you is just winning everything. But the real reason I'm calling is because my wife and I on our honeymoon went to Thailand for our honeymoon, rather, and we ate the durian fruit.

I mean, why? You guys were talking about earlier. Why? Well, we went on, okay, hold on. We went on a tour in Thailand, and our guide was like, oh, this is a durian fruit. It's native to Thailand. If you're on a tour, you need to eat it.

And we're like, okay, we're here. We might as well taste it. When else are we going to get the option? And then we went in, and we ate it, and that is literally the only way that I could describe to somebody who is not a Mets Jets Knicks fan of what it feels like to be a Mets Jets fan. Eating Duran is the feeling that we, the life that we live. Yeah.

I mean, it's that bad. So KPN fights need to eat it. And they need to eat, not want, they to eat it at the beginning of every sports season. Every night at 7, 10 p.m. when I sit down to watch a Mets game, it's like eating Duran. It's like, you know what? It can't be that bad. It's not going to be that bad. And then you eat it and you're like, what the fuck did I just do?

It is honestly so true. It's a very good comparison. Thank you for the call. The fuck did I just do? It is honestly so true. It's a very good comparison. Thank you for the call. Now I can at least, maybe I'm going to buy some Duran and just have it on deck and be like, man, what's it like? That must suck to be a Mets fan. Eat this.

And you'll fucking know. Here's a slice of fucking pool cheese. I was like 20 feet away from it and I was almost driving. Yeah, I mean, you could smell it off the elevator. It was that disgusting. So gross. Actually, despite all this, I'm still, as I'm tweeting right now, like, we'll be at Barstool the Ballpark tomorrow. Can't wait for the Mets game.

Look it forward to it. Mets.com slash Barstool. It's actually going to be like a perfect summer night. Unlimited beer. I mean, I'm just like literally not even going to watch a single pitch tomorrow. How drunk are you going to be when you show up to Pop Punk? Probably pretty drunk. I'll probably have one.

I'll probably tie one on. I feel like tomorrow will be – we talked about doing like a protest of some sort. No, it's not going to happen. What's going to happen is I'm just going to go to a bar that happens to be – it holds 50,000 people. There will only be like 10 of us, 10,000 of us there. But it's like I'm just going to the bar called Citi Field now. What a nice night. That's how I'm going to most people.

Where are you going tonight? I'm going to a really cool outdoor bar, man. Most summer baseball games, that's how I do it. Yeah. I'm not – go to a playoff game. I'm fucking intense. Dialed in, yeah. Or a big game.

But most baseball games are just you're at a bar outdoor and some people are playing I mean especially inactivity yeah like every now and then

I'll put my eye on it but other than that just hanging out summer baseball is good it's basically like watching going to a park and drinking

and sometimes you'll be like hey look those people playing frisbee and you'll watch them for a little bit it's just

it's a little bit of people watching it just happens to be professionals what else so we got Sometimes you'll be like, hey, look, there's people playing Frisbee, and you'll watch them for a little bit. It's just a little bit of people watching. It just happens to be professionals. What else have we got? You're spilling all over yourself. I just fucking dumped a beer on myself. You got a drinking problem.

What the fuck was that? I don't know how to drink. It just didn't even reach my mouth. I just dumped it out before it got to my mouth. By the way, we had that happy hour last night for advertisers and press people and whatever else. And at some point, I got sucked into taking straight shots of vodka with Feidelberg and Large and the group. And I started wondering, do normal companies

do that? Like at like 6pm are the people at the bar just like, let's all take straight shots. Oh no, I think there's a lot of drinking. Normal companies don't have a fucking bar. But I think there's a lot of drinking that goes on in corporate America. Well yeah, but I just it's just so normal for everybody to be like, yeah, let's just take straight shots of vodka at 6 p.m. No, I think it is. I think most people are almost – it's almost worse because they're all so fucking miserable.

Yeah. I mean the small taste of corporate life I got, people were – there was one girl at a holiday party who got scooped up by the police walking across the Brooklyn Bridge. Oh, well, holiday parties are always a wild card. We used to go down to Chevy's. It was like a Mexican spot down at the World Financial Center. Right away, there was tequila shots every single time. People were hooking up. People were, yeah.

Like once you get outside the building, it's like. Yeah. I was talking to one group of people. Last night? Yeah. And an attempt to be self-deprecating i think i made it it was the opposite was more appealing to them but they were like still like actually they kind of asked what your question was where they're like does it so is this something that happens like all the time

and i was like i mean usually it's like 11 o'clock on a wednesday and we're shirtless just hanging out i was trying to like lean into the frat boy thing and they were like oh can we come i was joking i was kidding but if you show up at 11 o'clock on a wednesday i will put that into the frat boy thing and they were like, oh, can we come? I was like... I was joking. I was kidding, but if you show up at 11 o'clock on a Wednesday, I will put that together

for you. When you told me that last night, I was like, you know you're going to have to get like five or six guys to sit around at 1130 shirtless one night just to prove your point. If you want to shoot me a tactic,

like we're coming, I will make it look like that's what we're doing. Yes, I can put that together. How about that idiot Casey last night with the salt on her eyebrows? Did you see that?

No. Oh, you know what, Stephen? She was drinking the margarita that had the salted rim. So when you drink it, the edge of the- How little is your fucking face? No, no, no. No, it works. No, it works.

Because Kevin started doing it too. It's like right, you know, the other edge of your cup hits directly where you would have like a unibrow. So Casey just had a salt unibrow. And you know what's- She was just talking to me and my brother and I told her right away I should have let it go. The worst part of that is like, I don't know if you saw Kate,

like Kate tweeted out before you even saw me because I saw Kate. I was like, Kate, you know you have like a salt unibrow. And she was like, what are you talking about? So I took a picture. She tweeted it and was like, shout out to Casey for checking out my salt unibrow. And then I just didn't even think it could happen to me.

Everybody has salt in it. But it has alcohol in it. I don't know what that drop is. She was just chatting about some shit and looking like a moron. Your brother was like, I thought that was a cool new thing, and I was like, what?

What? Yeah. He was like, I didn't know if it was a makeup thing or if it was there intentionally, so I just left it alone. Anthony Davis, he's in LA now. He's a trendsetter. Just like it could be some sort of-

Like I purposely put salt right between my eyebrows. I looked at Britt. I was like, what are you talking about? How could that possibly – Imagine though if you said like, oh, you got – That's such dad shit where like I might be so out of touch that salt on the face is a thing. I went up to a guy the other day. I broke my fucking rule of never talking to any strangers.

There was this dude who had his head shaved, completely bicked, and he had a couple white spots on the back. I just never say anything to anyone. If your fly's open, if there's toilet paper on your shoe, something embarrassing, nothing. I just leave you alone. I let a blind person bump into a bush today. Yeah, exactly. I'm not going to speak up.

That's why I should have let Casey just run around with a saw through her face. I thought they were going to see me. That's on them. No, no, no. That's different, though. If you know the person and you don't say something, you're an asshole. This was a stranger. For whatever reason, I decided to break my rule.

And as I was walking by him on the train platform, I was like, yo, dude, you still got some shaving cream on your head. I thought he had just shaved his head and didn't wipe it all off. And he was like, thanks. That's medication right now. And I was like, oh, that's gross. You just have lumps of lotion medication on your fucking head? That's why you don't say that to people.

Fine, asshole. Stay away from me with your weird disease. Yeah, that's why you just... It's like when you ask somebody when they're due and they're not. They're just fat. Yeah, well, that's, you know... I have a rule. Just don't talk to fat people.

Because you never know. You're going to get in trouble for it, you know? What? No. But if you're talking to a girl that is either fat and or pregnant, just don't mention her belly at all. Don't talk to any girls about their stomach, period. So I'm going to bring up Laura Rutledge. I don't know if you know who that is.

Who's that? So she's my friend. I don't think I've ever mentioned it. But she was doing the red carpet for the ESPYs, and she's pregnant. She's due in October. And she announced it on Twitter like a couple months ago. But obviously, I don't expect everybody here to know. Yeah, I didn't know. Yeah, so she's pregnant. She's due in October. And she announced it on Twitter like a couple months ago. But obviously, I don't expect everybody here

to know if she's... Yeah, I didn't know. Yeah, so she announced it. Well, Hubs walks in the day after the ESPYs and he was like, so Laura's pregnant? I was like, yeah.

And he was like, okay, I was kind of concerned. I saw her on the red carpet, saw she had a little belly going on. I was like, Hubs. Well, he also is... He's young and dumb. Guys are dumb when they're like, how old is Hubs?

Like 24 or some shit like that? I don't know. He's stupid. Laura Rutledge, Casey's friend. Do you know her? I don't know if you know who that is. Casey's friends with her. Yeah, so she's pregnant, and she announced that she was pregnant on Twitter.

Like I said, I don't expect everybody to know that, but she was doing the ESPY's red carpet and obviously is pregnant, so she had a belly. And Hubs came in the next day and was like, so is Laura pregnant? I said, guys should just never talk about a girl's stomach. Safe rule, right?

She might be pregnant, she might be fat, she might whatever, just don't talk about her stomach. And then you're in the clear. Forever and always. What's the best case scenario? There really isn't one. What do you do? Did you see Sneaky isn't one. No. Like, what do you do? And they're like, I guess they say yes. Did you see Sneaky Alex from Merch? No.

She's pregnant. What? She just showed up at the office the other day with a baby bump. Really? I was like, you sneaky motherfucker. Really? Yeah. I mean, I'm saying really like I'm surprised.

I mean, she doesn't even live here. I wasn't expecting to shoot me a text like, hey, husband knocked me up. Cool. I didn't even know she was married.