KFC Radio - Daddy Issues, Violet Benson, and Anteaters

Episode Date: October 23, 2018

Violet Benson from the VERY popular Instagram account, Daddy Issues, comes through to talk about why she doesn't find John Mayer attractive, Feitelberg's hatred of Trader Joes, and how to date a pro athlete in 4 easy steps. Plus, Violet answers voicemails about whether going to a church camp for a girl is worth it, if virtual sex is cheating, and waking up a guy with sex. The guys also talk about how Feits is becoming Columbian.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Today's episode of KFC Radio is brought to you by Thursday Boots. I talked to the head of Thursday Boots the other day. I got the itch for all sorts of leather goods. I was like, why don't we just, we'll do the boots, but why don't we do jackets, why don't we do everything? So he was like, I'm down. Yeah?

So, cause I... You talk to a lot of people you're always talking to people i'm just out there hustling man make that money bro i always like you'll always text me like so i was texting him will you text other people what the fuck is that about you well you go out with other people yeah that's true so fuck you babe uh but i i But I sent you that picture of DiCaprio in that gray suede jacket. So there's some picture of DiCaprio at some event, and he's in this suede gray bomber jacket. And I was like, yo, fight. And I can't find it anywhere other than it's on Armani's website for like $5,000. So I was like, let's not do that.

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to never have to pay for clothes ever again. Yeah, it's working pretty well. So we got the boots checked down. We'll get the jacket next, and every single thing else in between Thursday Boots is going to make for us. Right now, we're already sold out of the Barstool Boot 1.0. We are working on Barstool Boot 2.0, hopefully out later this season. And some jackets to go along with it. They've got bags.

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Thursdayboots.com starts at $149. Free shipping, free returns. Freeship2day to get them by Thursday. We got a big episode today. We got a female crossover episode with you. We got Violet Benson from Daddy Issues. So if you are a KC Radio female listener, which... Violet Benson's a really pretty name.

That's a great name. I feel like that's like a... You're destined to be like a big deal. Violet Benson. Yeah. I'm sure if you're a female KC Radio listener, you are aware of Daddy Issues. Her Instagram account turned fucking entrepreneurial empire um so she's out there doing her thing she got like four or five

million instagram followers and she came in and did voicemails with us she rolled up in here just like she owned the joint yeah she got here a little she was here at 3 30 got here a little early at three i walk over she's sitting at the desk right in front of the elevator, and I was like, oh, hey, sorry to keep you waiting. You want to get in there? She was like, in a moment. I'm good. Just posted on her to her 5 million people. I was like, oh, okay, damn.

And then at that point, we had Buffalo Wild Wings in here, and I kind of jokingly was like, you hungry? You want some wings? And she was like, yeah. So she just sat here eating wings and fries as we recorded. I was like, this is some power move shit. This is one badass bitch. She ate wings. I'm going to file it if you're listening. I was like, this is some power move shit. This is one badass bitch. She ate wings. I'm going to file it if you're listening.

I'm sorry, but you eat wings really weird. She like peeled the boneless wings apart. It's actually kind of very dainty if you ask me. It was, yeah. I wasn't saying she savaged them, but I've never seen a- She ate it like string cheese. Yeah. She peeled them and then ate them.

Yeah, so I was right in calling that weird. Yeah, no, no, no doubt. It just wasn't that she was manly ravaging them It was very dainty wing peeling Anyway, she got right down to business with our voicemails She was talking guys she's dating And answered pretty much every question that rolled her way So big timetime crossover. We'll get to voicemails later with her.

But first, we've got to dive into the world of Reddit. We got this question posed from Reddit, where it's just that, I mean, Reddit's like the weirdest place on the internet. I like Reddit. I don't know any subreddit. But I don't know any others. I just mindlessly scroll the front page.

Reddit is the internet. It's everything. But that also means it's everybody. And so you get the tales and stories and questions. There was actually one awesome one today. It was like my Reddit. Basically, I read the first three threads. And then my mind just turns off and I scroll slowly. But the first one today was, how do I test if my parents are my real parents or something like that?

And the TLDR on it was, I don't have it in front of me, but the TLDR was something along the lines of, pretty sure my dead sister is my real mom. In Florida, by the way. Because that's the qualifier. It's like, oh, okay. That makes sense. Yeah. Today we got this

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Go to blackbuffalo.com, promo code BARSTOOL for 20% off. Follow them on social at BlackBuffaloInc and get that discount. You go to blackbuffalo.com, promo code BARSTOOL, 20% off. Follow him on social at BlackBuffaloInc and get that discount. You go to BlackBuffalo.com. Promo code Barstool, 20% off. So the question on Reddit today, or actually this was last week, but, Hi guys, my wife and I have been married for two years, together for four total.

I grew up in Europe, and circumcision is extremely rare there. Apparently it's much more common in the US. Yes. All her past boyfriends were circumcised, and she says she prefers it's much more common in the U.S. Yes. All her past boyfriends were circumcised, and she says she prefers it that way, which already is tough. Just like, yeah, no, I mean, I'll deal with your dick, but, you know. That's very understandable, but you don't say that out loud.

Yeah, your lover telling you you got a shitty dick isn't great. The worst. That's only the beginning of it. She stopped giving me oral sex once we got married. Who fucking talks like that? No fucking kidding, by the way. Yeah, that is a little weird. Like, she stopped fellatio on me.

She stopped giving me oral sex? Yeah, no, she stopped blowing you, dude. But, like, no fucking kidding. And she says it's because she doesn't like doing it for me because of how I am not snipped. She also calls it anteater penis and makes increasingly disgusted faces when we have sex. I am willing to do this in order to make her happy, meaning the circumcision, but I just want to know your thoughts about this. TLDR, wife doesn't like my anteater dick as she calls it, so she wants me to get circumcised. This is...

This is on her You bought it You can't return it Oh absolutely Okay wait It's on her But it's also on him To like wake the fuck up

Like here's Guess what's gonna happen dude You're gonna get Circumcised At the age of like 30 or whatever You're gonna have to deal With the stitches

And the dick popping And all the horrible things That come with adult circumcision And then guess what She's not gonna suck Your dick then either because you are just a married dude with a girl who doesn't want to blow you. And the added bonus is that she has this scapegoat of you got an ugly dick, but you could have a great dick.

Your wife's not going to blow you because guess what? Wives don't blow you. That's just how it goes. So, I mean. That's such a weird phenomenon to me. It's not a phenomenon what the the like that you just stop getting blown yeah you know i mean that's that is kind of like uh one of those things that you joke about but like i don't think but then you realize like oh this is dead ass serious

but i don't think i wouldn't stop going down on on my wife i enjoy enjoy it. Yeah, but eventually. I like her. I like eating vaginas. Well, back it up. Seems like a pretty good duo. Back it up. What'd you say? Is that like her? Yep.

Nope. There's the problem. Sometimes. So some guy said something to the effect, I can't find the exact comment. He was like, well, guess what? You're just going to have a bloody dick and still get no blowjobs. I just said I like going down on vaginas. That guy's off the hook for being the weirdest one to describe oral sex.

I mean, the thing... That was a bag of sand shit. The extent that guys will go to for their women sometimes, you know, getting your dick chopped at an adult age is... That's that shit, too, where you have to take, like, estrogen pills or whatever because you can't get a boner. I would have no interest

in ever taking anything that, like it's kind of the same thing why I'm like really hoping that the, you know, male birth control pill

gets put off a little bit longer because it's proven to work with women. Yeah. Like I don't want to fuck Yeah, no, don't rock the apple cart here.

Yeah. Like I'll make my dick not get up for two months or however long it takes for stitches to heal. What if it just stops working forever? Yeah, yeah. It's almost like... It's high risk. Yeah, yeah.

And that's probably what she's hoping. What if it never comes back? But this wife is hoping. Yep, that is true. She's like, maybe there'll be an accident during there. I won't have to worry about that dick ever again. Bottom line is, she blew you for a couple years, then she got the ring, and she got settled,

and now she ain't gonna go the extra mile, whether you got an anteater dick, or whether you got yourself a clean old penis head. Aren't dicks the same once they're hard anyway? I mean, you've seen it before.

You know how it is. It still looks a little funny. Yeah, Manuel's got a big old penis on him. Yeah, but you know, it's still got that, like, flap kind of, that, like, pulls back, you know?

See, it is gross. The face you just made. I'm on this girl's side. It's gross. You probably should just not have married a guy with a dick that repulses you. like pulls back, you know? See, it is gross. The face you just made. I'm on this girl's side. It's gross. You probably should just not have married a guy with a dick that repulses you. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

When you call it Annie your dick and you make, quote, increasingly disgusted faces during sex, you probably should have picked a different dick. Just circumcise your children,

everybody. Let's make this a PSA. For real, right? It just makes high school hard for you. Are you guys both circumcised, by the way? Let's hope.

Okay. Everybody's good, yeah. You guys both circumcised, by the way? Let's hope. Okay. Everybody's good. They'll try. A hard time to ask. Guys with awful dicks will be like, it's better, or girls like it more. It's like, you are making things up to make yourself feel better about your ugly dick. That's fine. You got to deal with the hand you're dealt.

If your parents didn't snip you, then I don't know what to tell you. But don't go getting your dick snipped at this age for some girl who's definitely not going to blow you no matter what your dick looks like. Yeah, it doesn't seem like she's too into it. I was team indoors this weekend. I was on my Lisa mattress. Barely even got out of my Lisa mattress because I have just fully embraced the indoors life. Lisa mattresses are the most quality mattress, the most comfortable mattress, the most affordable mattress on the market. Their mission is to provide everyone with a better night's sleep and, in my case, a better day's rest.

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Go to leesa.com slash barstool. Barstool Indoors has launched. It's an idea I've had for a while now. It's an Instagram account just displaying the greatest feats of extreme indoor living. It was nothing but donuts, Netflix. Shout out to the haunting of Hill House. Oh, you were sorry about that? Yep. See, I'm scared of scary stuff.

It's scary. It's fucking scary. I was watching it at night and I was like, this is scary. I don't know about this. I think maybe I'll do I was team outdoors this weekend. Yeah, what the fuck was that about, dude? We were the Alpha and the Omega on this one. I was like, what the fuck is this guy doing? It was so weird. I've never done anything like that before.

But next Saturday I stay in. That'll be that. Because I can't be watching that at night. I mean, people were sending me their steps for the day. The Sunday steps, I mean, there were some people who had less than 100 steps. Dude, my guy Kawan famously told me he had 34 steps on the fun bar. That's amazing. It's probably the most impressive.

Gretzky stuff, fuck that. Tony Gwynn stuff, fuck that. Kwan took 34 steps in 24 hours. That's amazing. You know what? I aspire to that. That is absolutely incredible. I think he was peeing in jars.

Yeah, because even just walking to the bathroom from the back, you're going to get to like 40. Yeah, I mean, some people are like, dude, that's not real. They just left their phone on the table all day like yeah well that's where you're wherever your phone is where you are right if it's just sitting there so are you so team indoors on uh it's barstool indoors on ig send me all your pictures of you lounging around and all the uh everything that uh celebrates the indoor life culture fuck yp and his barstool outdoors nonsense

nature and fucking living things fuck out of here i'm all about that inanimate life inanimate object life you on the other hand i mean you're going to sporting events you're going to concerts you're associating with strangers you're surrounded by people it was very elements oh yeah i did i did the nets game friday night uh yeah nick's nets I don't miss those. Big basketball guy. It was actually wild. Boston, I think, gets an unfair rep for racism.

I think it is. It's pretty well earned. Well, I mean, everyone's racist. Racism is a problem everywhere. So, yeah, Boston is no different. It's a little different. But I will say, going to games in New York, like, a lot of black people here. Like, it's crazy. No, like, you go to a Boston sporting event, you might see three black people.

Oh, yeah. It's wild. Yeah, no, it's because it's a racist city. Black people are like, I'm not going to live there. Yeah, but it doesn't make you are like, I'm not going to live there. Yeah, but it doesn't make you. I'm not racist. I don't have any black friends, but I'm not a racist just because. Well, Tyler's a friend now.

Tyler came with me to the next game. I invited Tyler to the game with me. Tyler's a friend. But I typically. I have a black friend. We've talked about this before. If I were to tell my life story, it would be like Seinfeld. There really wouldn't be black people. You are not racist like everyone else in Boston is.

Okay. So, whatever. Anyway. Just walking through the crowd. I was like, holy shit. Black people are out. This is wild. But then Saturday.

And that was the second most culturally expansive event of your week. Right? Yeah, dude. Saturday night. Woo-hoo-hoo! J Balvin! Let me tell you what. what this motherfucker is gonna fuck all your girlfriends this guy runs the world j balvin is not fucking around man he's the colombian like uh people right like he is mega star yeah and i had friends uh friends of the town from columbia high school friends john's basically like at least

30 percent columbian now oh yeah at yeah. At least. I hope more. I hope to become more at some point. This dude, right? So they asked me, they said, you want to go to a J Balvin concert? Didn't even look it up. I said, sure. That's fine. I'll do that. And Devlin just walked in here and really threw me off my game. J Balvin, by the way,

he's on. You'll probably know him from Cardi B's song. I like it like that. That's like his big American hit. I didn't know that. So I was like, yeah, sure, you'll probably know him from Cardi B's song, I Like It Like That. That's like his big American hit. I didn't know that. So I was like, yeah, sure, I'll go to a Colombian concert. I figured it was going to be like this little bar that I could sneak out whenever I wanted to. The Barclays Center. I didn't learn this until Saturday at 6 p.m.

I was like, so where is this concert anyway? Like in Brooklyn. I was like, oh, it's going to be like some hipster bar. Some hipster shit, yeah. And they didn't know what the Barclays Center was either. I was like, wait, it's at the Barclays Center? Wow. So we took- Selling out's the Barclays Center? Wow. So we took—

Selling out arenas. Sold it the fuck out. Yeah. We took the N train over to Brooklyn. Might as well have been in Bogota. It was incredible. People were dressed up like Colombian superheroes. They had the flags draped over them like we're going to a World Cup game.

You know what this is like? You know when you guys—I always see this here. Like when the Red Sox are in town or the Patriots play here, you guys always make sure to get your tickets because you get to see your team without traveling. When the fucking Colombian superstar comes to you in Brooklyn, you go all out. Dude, it was like a train, an entire subway,

full of the back of the bus in elementary school. Remember when you're singing? Whole subway just banging out J Balvin. And you. Oh, and I was in there, I was in there dancing like, you know like when they had the, the headphone concert,

the silent discos? Yep. It was like I had a, was it my own silent disco or not? I had Mumford and Sons playing, right? I had Zac Brown band in my headphones while I was dancing,

and everyone else was like fucking breaking it down. But dude, it was, it was wow, it was so much fucking fun. It was probably my most fun night in New York. Well, yeah, listen, white people are the most boring people on the planet.

Yes. Because of what you, I mean, we are listening. We're just like, I don't like my chicken fried and that's it. The fucking Colombians are out there like fucking the hips are swinging. The people are singing. That dude, Jay Balvin, he doesn't even speak a word of English. That's how much he's like, I don't give a fuck about you white people. He doesn't have any songs in English. I guess he does speak it, but he doesn't even speak a word of English. That's how much he's like, I don't give a fuck about you white people. He doesn't have any songs in English.

I guess he does speak it, but he doesn't do it. To roll up in America in Barclays and not play a single American song is just like, me and my Latino Hispanic culture are taking the fuck off. It was. And they really show out. It was, they fucking, guess what? Colombians like to party. Yeah.

It was the bar, not even the bar in Barclays Center when you first walk in is one to the left. Yep. The bar, even the bartenders weren't even trying to keep it tidy. Bottles were just everywhere. It looked like a frat house on a Saturday morning. And everyone was ripping it up. But then, once his first note played, people went sprinting into the room. I've been to concerts before where people were like, ah, I'm missing the first song or whatever.

The first note played turned into a ghost town. It was like Balvin got up there and was like, yo, I'm missing the first song or whatever. The first note played turned into a ghost town. It was like Balvin got up there and was like, yo, we're giving out free visas in here. Get your green cards. Get your green cards. Everyone went sprinting in there.

John just left with his Bud Lights. Yeah. The white guy like... Yeah, like you think I'm drinking Bud Lights at J Balvin? I was drinking tequila

and Modelo's. Modelo's. But dude, no, it was so much fun. Like this guy, they like literally, what did you do? Cause I know,

I don't even know what to do when I know the words and shit. That was awkward. That was almost more freeing. Yeah, cause it was, I was just like fucking jamming out. Little like,

doing like Lars Ulrich, Metallica guitar, drum. Jesus, really took too long to get that one out. But it was like, and then there's one song

where he, I was, I was mouthing into words. I never heard a single J Balvin song. I was like. You were singing along? I was singing along to every song. There was one they brought out, like they turned kind of the back TV into a karaoke type thing. Yeah. So I was trying to rap that.

I don't speak Spanish. I mean, listen. We know how to, we've been singing Despacito and Danza Coduro forever. We basically know Spanish at this point. Yeah, that's true. Come on. But it was like, I mean, I've been've been singing Despacito and Danza Coduro forever. We basically know Spanish at this point. Yeah, that's true. Come on. But it was like, I mean, I've been to a lot of concerts. I've been to a lot of Super Bowls and World Series games.

I've been to a lot of shit. I've never been in a louder event in my entire life. Every single song was like kids opening a new present on Christmas. Like every single song was like, Ah! He's playing this one now! People were literally throwing underwear at present on Christmas. Like, every single song was like, AHHHHH! HE'S PLAYING THIS ONE NOW! People were literally throwing underwear at him on stage.

He was just picking up bras. Half the time, he was up there just picking up bras. That's awesome shit right there. Yeah. He got one song. John was taking off his Tommy John. Yeah! I love how you just casually drop. I've been to World Series games.

Fuck you. Yeah, Super Bowls. World Series. Speaking of World Series games, we got the FanDuel Bowls, World Series. Speaking of World Series games, we got the FanDuel event going on right now, the Gold Bottles giveaway. You go to fanduel.com slash Viva and it's the official

home for all the new advisors picks. You can go in there, you can see everybody's records for the Barstool Advisors and then you watch it live on Sunday morning. Right now, there's also the $1 Beat Dave contest. You win $500 or you can play PMT's weekly leaderboard. I went on a trip to Atlanta in February, if you haven't played. So go to fanduel.com slash Viva.

And if you're in New Jersey, make sure you use promo code STOOL at the FanDuel Sportsbook, and they will double your first deposit up to $100. So we've got gold bottles giveaway going on for World Series, and we've also got fanduel.com slash Viva for all your football needs. Let's get into our voicemails. Yeah, you can say whatever you want. Everyone knows I eat.

Have you seen A Star is Born? No, is it good? You're talking to the biggest fan in the world over here. Are you serious? He's crying, singing it, he's all about it. You like it? Not much? I loved it, yeah.

I didn't know guys would go to see it. Oh, yeah. See, I told you. If I was a man in this right now, I'd be very offended. You like it? Not much? I loved it, yeah. I didn't know guys would go to see it. Oh, yeah. See, I told you. We're not like- If I was a man in this right now, I'd be very offended. Are we recording? Okay. Are we recording?

We're sitting down here with Violet Benson. She runs Daddy Issues, the monster Instagram account, the website, the clothing brand. I mean, everything. And she comes in here- The porn? Yeah, the porn site. She comes in here and she's put us in a box. Barstool Sports and guys don't like movies and this, that, and the other thing. Guys don't like movies?

Yeah, that's what you just said. We're going to educate you, girl, okay? Okay. I don't think you're allowed to talk to me like that anymore. I think every time you say something, I'll just say that. Yeah, it's true. It's true. The feminist world has gone crazy. I'll just say that. Yeah, it's true. It's true. The feminist world has gone crazy.

You, uh... I can't say that. But... I'm a side-over to say goodbye to her. Yeah, just leave me out here tonight. The reason I can say that is because, see, you're on my show, and you're, like, the biggest feminist, really, when you think about it. Yeah, I've been called that for some reason.

I don't know why. As you crush these wings and fries as you eat. I love it. I'm in the middle. Because you're real. That's actually what feminism is, I think. Whoa. Are we mansplaining feminism?

Definitely slide it over. No, but I agree. Feminism is about equality. I want equality. I think sometimes in... I don't know. I wasn't even going to say that. I need to test my managers what I'm allowed to say.

I was going to say more that you're just a fucking boss who's running shit. And to me, that's like the biggest example of feminism. It's like you've started this from nothing. You grew into this major account, grew into this major brand. You're a personality. And you do it like all yourself. And you're a chick. So it's feminism, motherfucker.

Right? Thanks. Sure. Why not? We'll sign up for it. And motherfucker. Right? Thanks. Sure. Why not? We'll sign up for it. And I like playing video games. Oh. How cool am I?

Guys get so mad about that. That's like- What, girls who play video games? Girls who say they like sports or video games, guys get very- No, you don't. Not really. Well, I don't like sports. You don't game like I game.

It's like, probably not. Yeah, dude. Yeah, I shower. I actually am thinking of I just joined Twitch and I was like and I was trying to explain to my dad because my dad was also like

you're not going to be that good blah blah blah and I was like dad I want to join Twitch and then I want to wear low cut shirts and you guys donate me money

and he was just like like he wanted to die when I said that and I was like what else do you think I want to play it? I want to make money. Yo, yo, also feminism.

By the way, you don't need to be good at Twitch. We have a guy here who is the worst in the whole world and everybody watches him because he's bad. He's literally like

the worst player in the world. No, I get wins, but half the time... Wait, wait, wait, you do? Yeah. Because this guy literally, he can't win. No, I get on teams. I get on teams, though.

So I get on those teams, and I'll save people. What is that word? Resurrect? I've never played. I'm not a gamer. I bring people back, but then half the time, I'm like, where the fuck are they shooting at me at? And I'll just hide or I'll build a house around me, and

that's how I survive. So actually, I think I've only shot two people in the whole time I've been playing. You have an aversion to violence? Like, I can't kill. That's not nice. That sounds better than Smitty to me. Sometimes people save me and I'm like, no, why did you do that? I'm so useless in this game. It's really fun, though.

So for people who don't know, Daddy Issues is, like I said, the Instagram account that you started, which is 4 million followers right now. Yeah. Monster numbers. Monster numbers. Sure. I mean, yeah. Oh, and you're still humble too. That's good.

Thanks. For like one person who started at 4 million followers. It's fucking legit. And my personal Instagram has 700,000 followers. Not that I even noticed. You guys want me to ask after this? I could use Instagram. We could use some help there. Not that I even noticed,

but it's like 701,903. No big deal. Is that really? No, I don't know. I was like, wow. Do you guys also run your Twitter? The Twitter? The actual Barstool Sports Twitter? There's a social team that does that. We all have our individual, our own individual. I'm K actual barstool sports twitter no that's like there's like a social team who does that we all have our individual our own individual so like i'm kfc barstool he's fights barstool yeah okay cool cool so it's like you know individual we can talk about sports though

okay yeah which football team are you guys rooting for i'm rooting for um the eagles Are you? No. You said you really don't know. You Ron Bergen did that. Eagles? Yeah. No, but the account is funny. It's like honest female humor, right? I guess it's like the most simple way to describe it.

But you're a phony. What? Yeah, you're a phony. Okay? Yeah, you're a phony. Okay, gone. Because I don't think you have daddy issues. That's incorrect. I don't think, I shouldn't speak for you, but I don't think you have like the traditional, it doesn't seem like you have the traditional daddy issues.

Well, I wrote about it, that there could be different types of daddy issues. Just, I feel like people, when people think a girl daddy issues, they assume that's a very promiscuous girl, which is, there's nothing wrong with that, i'm more daddy she's in the way that um i yearn uh for love i'm like saying it's sarcastic but i actually mean it like my dad didn't say i love you or hug me until i was like 23 or 24 so uh i feel like it definitely affected my relationship uh i stand corrected i was gonna say you own actual you went with that real quick and and I was like, she brought up her dad five minutes into this podcast. Well, we have a good relationship.

We've been working on our relationship, but the reason I play video games is because growing up, when he would be home, we would play video games. That was our way of bonding, because we have nothing in common. So now it's still the same thing. A lot of times when he talks, I'm always like, I have nothing in common with this dude so then like i play video games and i love him he's great it's like good daddy issues it's like fun daddy issues we play video games together and you're in for love turns out i have that issues too yeah who knew it's it's applicable to everybody like i literally growing up people thought some people would be like did you get

molested or something? Because not, hold on, let me finish. Not because of my dad. Because I would have a hard time if people touched me or tried to hug me. I would be uncomfortable because I didn't know how to react because I literally didn't grow up with like that. So I would say I have some serious dad issues, but I've been working on it and I'm very loving, I think. I'm not sure. Sometimes people still tell me I'm cold

because I'm Russian. But I do give advice. That's a good excuse, actually. Oh, that's great. You should play it all the time. You could just be a dick to people and be like, I'm sorry, I'm Russian. No, but I do give advice to people

that you can't blame your past. If you're a terrible person, you can't be like, well, it's because one time my mom didn't hug me. It's like, shut the fuck up. If you're a terrible person, you're a terrible person

because you're a terrible person. You can still change. Talk to them him girl yeah tell him well i do because being like a russian immigrant the way my parents raised me tough love is that i give very tough love back to other people yeah i always see you on the instagram you're just like like fucking man up who cares about that boy fuck him let's go yeah i say that and then i'm i'm always like i feel like i'm such a phony because i'd be like block his number and love yourself and i literally as i say that i unblock the guy's number and i'm like hey what's up what are you doing

there's literally because girls could be so like accomplished and put together and whatever and then like and i guess this goes both ways but the right guy like has your number literally and metaphorically just like ruin your life yeah like ways, but the right guy, like, has your number literally and metaphorically can just, like, ruin your life. Yeah. Like, all it takes is a guy being, like, just one text, and it's like, oh, it all goes out the window. Yeah. Like, everything, nothing else matters except that. I'll tell you the trick.

It's, like, I feel like the trick is if someone's really, really nice to you, but then they're, like, a little distant, too, but they're overly nice. Like, no matter what you say, they'll always, like, this one guy, like, he's always nice. I can literally be like, you know what? I can't stand you, and you suck. Never speak to me again, blah, blah, blah. And then afterwards, he'll be like, my guy, like he's always nice. I can literally be like, you know what? I can't stand you and you suck. Never speak to me again, blah, blah, blah. And then afterwards he'll be like, my bad. And he's like, it's okay. No worries.

So then I'm like, oh my God, I love him. Yeah. So what? We're pretty good at that. That's me in a nutshell right there. Yeah. That works for a while and then eventually it just bubbles up and doesn't. Oh, then that person, I would love for that person to go off on me.

Then I'm like, you feel something. Yeah. But has it happened? What's up? I mean, listen, you were yearning for love. I'm just saying, it might be right here in front of you. So we're going to listen to some voicemails here, some questions about relationships

and whatever else may happen. So, Violet Benson. For being Barstool Sports, you suck at sports. First of all, I am actually very- You didn't even make it into the basket. That was- It's too close. All right, move it.

Oh, if anyone's listening, I love sports, especially the athletes. So, if you want to hit me up, let me know. Do you have money? Like, holler at me and the DMs are open. No, if you're over 6'8", 6'7", 6'8", holler at me and the DMs are open no if you're over 6'8 6'7 6'8 holler at me 6'8

Jesus as she munches the fry that was unbelievable what is your what is your legit number for height I'm down with like 6 feet

but 6'8 like ideal guy what height well right now what does that mean does it change it changes based on whoever like

the last person I talk to like usually I like I like a genre of a so I would the same people Does it change? It changes based on whoever, like, the last person I talk to. Like, usually I like a genre of a, so I would date the same people for a second. Got it. And then I, like, move on to, like, a different genre or whatever it's called. So right now, I would say the height of a guy that I would like would be 6'7 or taller. No, 6'8. That's, like, negative 1% of the population. Like, you are really limiting yourself.

Really, really taking it down. But I'm sure I'll get over it really fast. Wait, so that means you hooked up with a tall guy and now you're on tall guys for the moment or what? Why is that the genre right now? Because it's just the genre. That's what I've dated recently. That's what I mean. Where do you find someone?

You go to the NBA and that's it. I'm trying to think. Where would you even locate? I've got to go out tonight and find a 6'8 guy. You're not going to and that's it. I'm trying to think. Where would you even locate? I got to go out tonight. I got to find a 6'8 guy. You're not going to see any of them. You just hang out outside big and tall. I want to date a leprechaun too.

You're not going to find one. It's way easier than you think. It's not. Because when I see a 6'8 person, I notice. Wait, poor girl. And I don't see them very often. I'm very confident. So I feel like, and I like, it's the weirdest thing.

I feel like I should have been born a boy, because, and let's not get into a conversation, it's because, uh. Wasn't gonna throw me. You're like, don't follow up on that. Because, like, I'm very confident, I like the chase, where I chase the guy first, so it's like, when guys pursue me, I'm like, ugh, whatever. But for me, I kind of like the chase where I see someone, I'm like, okay, I want that one.

Classic. And then, like, so it's really easy I literally could just DM someone like a smiley face and they're mine that's true but okay

so that's so but that's but that's I DM you a smiley face and you belong to me that is true though as long as the girl as long as the girl

is willing to make the first move you can find any height any size any shape any color because guys are gonna be like okay I'm down

but if not finding a 6'7 guy is if you're're just going to go to the bar and look pretty and be like, all right, I'm just going to wait for the 6'7 guy to come hit on me. No, obviously I'm saying the hype based on a specific genre, whoever I've been dating. You need to say like Rick. You're the guy you want is in 6'8, like his name's Tom. It's a very specific guy we're talking about here. Bring that basketball player.

Yeah. He's a basketball player. I mean, I feel like you just watch NBA games and then go find their Twitter or DM. But recently, when I was trying to get over one basketball player that I dated, I went. Is it LeBron? I wish. No, he has a wife. He's in L.A. now.

He's in L.A. Never. I would never go for someone. Like, I don't want to be the side girl. I just don't want, oh, I don't want to know about it. Like, I don't know. All right, so which NBA guy were you hooking up with? I would never say.

That's like literally the one area where I'm very private about is whoever I date because I feel like everything else is so public. Everything else is out there, yep. But like when I was trying to get over, and this is overly honest right now, so I hope not that many people listen to this. No, it's just us.

It's just four of us. When I was trying to get over, my feelings were kind of hurt by this one guy that I was dating because he moved to the city he plays at. Then, I was just like,

okay, I need to replace him so I won't get upset. So then I looked for his specific characteristics that he had into an LA team so I oh my god if this guy if the second guy hears this he'll never talk to me again okay so

here's the truth so then this is how I acted like a boy I went on I was like okay who plays in LA okay Lakers and Clippers Lakers are cooler I don't really know much but I feel like Lakers no doubt I went on the Instagram I was like who's single here I'm like okay these three guys look cool I dm'd one the other one like I's single here? I'm like, okay, these three guys look cool. I DM'd one. The other one, I like his pictures. As I'm about to go on the third guy's Instagram, the first one answers. And I was like, okay, cool. So I unliked the other pictures, and I was like, it went for him.

Literally, I didn't put much thought into it. How to land a pro athlete in four steps by Violet Benson. That was wild. How easy it is to just be like, millionaire, you're mine. It's very easy for, I feel like, for girls to get athletes. If you want to be like, I doubt when I DM'd that guy, he was like, that's my future wife. Right. We're going to get into a monogamous relationship right now.

He was probably like, oh, cool. I'm going to have one girl in LA. Then I'll DM another girl. Like, it wasn't the same with whoever else I actually liked that I was talking to before. This guy, I just wanted attention. I knew already that I wasn't going to sleep with him or anything. I just wanted his attention.

That was cool. Yeah. That's pretty cool. I'm overly honest. I love it. That's what we do here. We're overly honest. Especially if you're verified, people will notice.

People will see your thing in the DM. Yeah, that blue check will do it all for you. Four million followers in a check. Oh, no, I DM'd them. I DM'd for my personal. Oh, 700,000 followers in a check. Sorry. Yeah, having boobs really helps.

Yeah, that's not going to hurt your case. Oh, my God. I feel like I don't sound like a feminist right now. I'm telling you, that is feminism. It's fine. Use your tits to fuck ballplayers. That's feminism. Whatever.

Well, no, I just said tension, not to sleep about it. Get the attention. Fine. All right, let's talk to him. Okay, let's do it. So KFC fights Superdiction BC. So I had a question for you guys. I'm back and going to this fucking church retreat.

I didn't... What? Church retreat? I don't need to go means am I like that deep into my religion or faith or bullshit, you know, whatever. But I'm going because I'm trying to impress this girl

that's going. Mind you, I am a junior in college and I am still doing the dumbest shit to try and get a girl to talk to me. But my question is, what is the furthest or dumbest thing you guys would do to get a girl to like, you know, to get a girl to notice you? All right, so this dude is going on a church retreat. First of all, the juxtaposition is so perfect that Violet just told us about how she liked the picture.

This guy's like changing his faith. So I became a priest because... So this guy's on a church retreat to get the attention of a girl. I mean, that's a steep one. If you're not into that shit, like if you're not into religion, doing a church retreat is like...

That's fucking a lot. I think I would literally snap if I was on a church retreat. I think I'd kill snap if I was on a church retreat. I think I'd kill people. I'd become a murderer. I can see just trying to deal with that for 30 seconds to a minute and just being like,

this ain't me. If that's not the scene for you, it's a tough one to swallow. I think sometimes guys, to get a girl's attention, what they do is they like 75 of their pictures at once to get the attention.

I've never done that. Does it work? That sounds pretty drastic, but better than a church retreat. Better than, yeah. I mean... So wait, you just said that before. You were like, you like when a guy is kind of distant,

so you have to chase him. So like if some dude... I don't always like it. It's not really good for my self-esteem. I haven't been loving this guy that actually liked like being distant but you know i'm still around what what what a like advertisement for yourself i'm still around i'm like here but like if a dude signed up to you, whatever your version of the church retreat is.

So he's coming to like, you know, some fucking Instagram thing that you like. You know, are you into that or are you like you're trying too hard? Well, it depends. I don't know how. Like I wish I knew their relationship already. Like if they went on one day or two dates,, if it's someone she just met who was like, hey, what's your name? Or he works at Starbucks and he gave her a drink

and then he's Googled her and stuff, that's creepy. You've got to do it at the right time. Yeah, hopefully she's into him but I would be impressed if I was going to something.

As long as I like the guy. If I gave him hints that I like him, I would be happy that he's at the same place as me. If he shows up and he's 6'7",

a millionaire, then we're good. No, the guy, no. I always date two guys at a time, and they have to be the same genre. Two guys at a time. I'm giving myself a really good time. I love it. I love the move that's just like, oh, most people do one, I'm going to do two. I wouldn't do this for anybody.

A church retreat? I wouldn't do this for anybody. A church retreat? I wouldn't do anything for anybody. Well, I was going to say, I feel like your bar for this, your tolerance for this is pretty low. Yeah, I have no answer to this question. No, that's not true, though. What would you guys do to get a girl, then? Nothing. But I feel like, you know what?

Absolutely nothing. John's not going to do anything to get the girl, but once he gets the girl, he's going to do whatever. Right. Like, all right, you want to go here? You want to watch this movie? You want to do that? You want to, you know, like, whatever. Wow, that's so nice. Like, it's literally the bare minimum and he's like, he's impressive.

Do you want to go there? Cool. Oh my god. You're romantic. You know? I mean, like, my last relationship was probably like six months I never once chose dinner

yeah right just like whatever you want that is romantic yeah don't say that the bar is too low when it's just like I'll always do

what you want to do I never chose a show except I'm always in standby mode anyway like my life is just like

it could be turned on at some point so I'm just sitting there I don't give a fuck what's on TV. You're both just here. Yeah, I'm around here. Oh, my God, it's literally that guy that I was talking to. It's him.

I can literally be like, let's go to Hawaii, and he'd be like, okay. I'd be like, you know what? Never mind. You're so annoying. I'm going to leave. Okay. Actually, let's just get dinner right now. Okay.

And I was like, ugh. Do you feel anything? Is there anything in there? No. Nope. That's the short answer? The answer is a resounding no. You want to talk about daddy issues and family issues and emotions?

Nope. We're worse. What's the most you've ever done? What's your version of going to a church? I know. So have you ever even done this? You like a picture and you're good to go. The Instagram thing.

That's it. I just told you I like the picture. That's it. No, but I went on the Lakers Instagram and I was like, who, which one? Oh, yeah, yeah. That's a church retreat right there, yeah. That's it. I'm not, I wouldn't, no.

I mean, I feel like I'm already, if I'm texting you, that shows I'm interested. And I'm very forward. Like, unlike other girls, like, I don't play games. So, like, I would say. You know who says that? Girls who play games. No, I swear I don't. Like, I'd be like

hey I want you where are you like it's very very straightforward if I'm not interested I'd be like hey I'm not interested in dating

you're nothing personal or actually no I ghost I forget that love it love a ghost wait wait wait you were like

this is what I do no wait I do the exact opposite if I'm not interested in someone at all and we never dated and from the beginning I was interested in them

I don't want to get I'm overly honest and I offend people really, so I just avoid it by ghosting. So that's what I mean. You know if I like you or I don't. See, that's exactly why I like ghosting. Don't tell me the truth. We've been having this debate for a couple weeks now. Another girl in the office here was saying how she ghosts and how she thinks it's the best way to break up with someone.

No, that's different. And I think it's the worst way. If you're dating, no, that's terrible. I wouldn't do that i'm talking about some person that i met and somehow you got my number and i'm never not interested so i just never respond not someone that like has been inside of me yeah like i'm not gonna ghost them if someone deserves a response they deserve a response you know what i mean or a reason and vice versa like when i say i'm really sure for like let's say i went on a date with a guy and I liked him and then I don't hear from him for a few days.

Other girls, I feel like my friends, they'll be like, I don't know, should I just wave? Literally after two days, and I've done this recently, I was just like, hey, what's the deal? Do you like me? Do you not like me? Because I haven't heard from you. I need to know because I have so much shit to do and this is really annoying me thinking about it.

And you're just like, what? Yeah, of course I like you. That usually works. It's been working. worked it's been working get it girl i don't know you can send that text you send that text i don't know do you guys like confident girls not confident i don't know well it's it's a it's it's a fine line yeah i mean i know guys like to chase a girl yeah and um but it's also like you know confidence is sexy but it's like there's a fine line between confidence and like uh like in your face i guess yeah no i'm not i'm not in your face i think maybe in the beginning they find endearing after a while they're like hmm i don't like this

oh i thought i was just thought i was down with this boom dot very true that guy was a musician he was the worst oh look at you how was John Mayer was he good I've never dated him John Mayer has dated

a lot of my friends and I would never date that guy really why not first of all he's like 73 what can we look up

how old he is he's probably like a year older than me I'm gonna give John Mayer 37 and like based on the stories of her from my my friends, that's just not for me. I'm not interested. There's nothing attractive about him.

40. 40. Okay, my bad. I thought he was older. What's not attractive about John Mayer? Because I'm pretty sure that's a wild line. I guess maybe you're talking about personal. He's a womanizer.

And I don't think we'll be sexually compatible. I guess maybe you're talking about personal. He's a womanizer. I don't think we'll be sexually compatible. Okay. When a girl is like, I don't think sex with John Mayer is for me. Okay. Well, you've got a lot of options. I think sex with John Mayer is for me. So if you're already writing him off the list, that's pretty impressive. So John Mayer is on stage, ripping up the guitar, singing, and he's like, you, come

on with me. You're like, peace. No. Only because he's hurt one of my friend's feelings. Right. So you personally like him. So I'm very like a girl's girl with my friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I don't know. He can literally be the best looking guy ever, but because I've heard stories and I see how it affected my friend, like, I'm just like, ugh, ew. There's just, like, so many guys in this world, like, who gives a shit about some guy who sings. Like, there's so many other singers out there. Yeah, like, just go get a fucking scrub on the Lakers. It's like, done.

Next up. That guy, if he ever hears me saying this, he'll never talk to me again. Although, like, I kind of— You got one on deck. You got two at all times, so. Well, no, I kind of lost interest in that one anyway i still like the other one the first one who doesn't love me so me and my buddies have been talking about this for a while i know five you kind of touched on on last week's episode so getting waking up to a girl giving you a blowjob is what every guy wants.

Is it a good move to wake a girl up by eating her out? Judging by Violet's face, I would say no. That'd be so maddening. So guys want to get woken up with a blowjob? As a person, a victim of this, let's call it what it is. It's rape. I've been raped before. You were raped and you didn't even wake up.

I didn't wake up. John was once in this situation. He just stayed snoozing. What was it? With your girlfriend? It was with a girl. Okay. And you didn't like it?

I did not like it. I just didn't wake up. He just sleeps like a fucking bear. Yeah. Like, there could be, like... I fucking sleep hard. Like, real hard. I sleep like it's a goddamn contest. Yeah. Like, I'm going to like... I fucking sleep hard. Like, real hard. I sleep like it's a goddamn contest.

Yeah. Like, I'm going to win a prize for not waking up. The ultimate one. There could be, like, several girls blowing him in his ear. I think maybe a lot of girls would like it. I wouldn't. Not your scene? No.

Like, I'm a perfectionist. So, like, if I'm about to sleep with someone, like, I want to make sure I'm clean, everything's good. I feel that. Even from Guy's point of view. Like, I don't know. I'm sleeping. In the morning, I'm a perfectionist. So like if I'm about to sleep with someone, like I want to make sure I'm clean. Yeah, that's true. I feel that even from my, from guys point of view, like, I don't know, I'm sleeping like in the morning. I'm gross. Yeah. Like, you know, let me take care of that first.

Like relax. Like, hold on. Like, let me prepare myself mentally. That's about to happen. What if I fart? I'm asleep. I didn't think it would happen. No.

Oh my God. What if you fart in your sleep? I didn't say that. I didn't say that. Yeah. I'm not passing any gas. She just said like if some girl, if some guy goes down on her, she's going to fart. She said that.

No, I did not say that. Put that on Instagram right now. No, I did not say that. That's, like, one thing. I can literally talk about anything, but, like, passing gas and, like, going in the bathroom. You didn't say it. I can't do it. Say it.

Say fart. Say poop. My parents will, this day, use different bathrooms, and they've never passed gas in front of me. See, that's the way to live. I agree. Everybody always talks about when you get so comfortable with each other that you can go to the bathroom with the door open. To me, that's like, that relationship is on the down. I wouldn't.

I don't mind if the guy I'm dating, I have one boyfriend we're together for seven years or something. On and off and like i wouldn't mind if he passed gas including my other boyfriends but like me i don't want to do it i just feel like that's not for me yeah i'm i'm that's i don't want my girl farting in front of me either i don't want anybody farting in front yeah no that's the thing it's it's not a sex thing it's it's just i don't want you to fart in front of me anyone in this fucking room one time i was dating a guy and he thought it was funny to do have you guys ever heard of the Dutch oven

yeah so he did that I was just like mortified see yeah that to me is like this is not yeah I don't want this with my boyfriend

I can make a Dutch oven joke because I'm Jewish oh right yeah okay cool I mean I know where you're going with that

but the Dutch oven doesn't have to really relate to that I was gonna say I didn't know there was any connection. Okay, scratch that. Scratch that out of the record. Wait, so, oh, he asked if a girl would like it. Some girls would like it, but I think it would be, especially with the times right now, these days, you should ask first. Yeah, yeah.

Like, I was trying to be sexy and spontaneous, and now I'm going to jail. Yeah, that's like, it's not going to fly anymore. Like, if you even want to touch a shoulder, like, ask if it's okay first. Yeah, that's like it's not going to fly anymore. Like if you even want to touch a shoulder, like ask if it's okay. Yeah, that's a really good call. Really good call. Yeah. Hey, guys. So I was just at Trader Joe's and it was closing time so I was rushing and I walked up to this

one shelf and I looked at one of the guys, the employees, and he was really cute and made eye contact. And I realized I don't know what I'm at this show for. So I just reached out and grabbed like this giant thing of cute chicken because I didn't want him to think that I was being weird and standing there and not knowing what I was looking for. So the question is, what's the dumbest thing that you guys have done because an attractive person is looking at you? Also, what the fuck do I do with the shit ton of chicken that I have? I eat the chicken. A box of cubed chicken. What is cubed chicken?

I don't know. I've never seen it. I know it's chicken in a cube shape, I would imagine. Yeah, I mean, I don't think I've ever seen that. I've seen cubed chicken. Yeah. Where do you get cubed chicken? Trader Joe's, mostly. Apparently. No, I mean, I don't think I've ever seen that. I've seen cubed chicken. Yeah. Where do you get cubed chicken? Trader Joe's, mostly.

Apparently. No, I've been to Trader Joe's once. Fuck Trader Joe's. Trader Joe's is so stupid. Not a fan of Trader Joe's. No, I went once, and it was so fucking packed, right? As I was shopping, I had to keep asking people to move so I could get to a shelf. Yep.

And then I was like, as it's happening, I'm kind of filling my cart. I'm like, why the fuck is everyone fucking standing in front of stuff? Trader Joe's, it's like the hot spot. That's why. You're going to the popular fancy place where there's a million people. But when I went to check out, I learned that they were all in line. The line wrapped around the whole place. And I just left my cart and walked out.

I was like, I'm not fucking getting in that line. That's ridiculous. Do you think you can find out? Okay, so you have so many emotions about Trader Joe's, but you show no emotions to the girls you date. Like, I'm so confused. Facts. You are an enigma.

You got so upset about Trader Joe's, but with girls, he's like, okay. Yeah. Yeah. This is why. You're all fucked up. I'm not going to defend anything. Yeah. You're right.

It's weird. I don't get that. It's tough. It's tough to handle. Would you think meeting a guy in a grocery store is a good spot? That's not my thing. I like to go to the grocery store. Usually, this is like a real, I'm not even making this up.

I like to go to the grocery store usually like when it's later during the day and my Adderall's wearing off and I'm tired. So then I get very delirious and I find myself very entertaining and fun. So I like talking to myself when I'm in the grocery store. Oh, so you're crazy crazy. You're more than real crazy. And then like

that's how I can get creative in my brain of like what's the next video I'm going to shoot. So me talking to myself like it's inspiring like ideas. So I wouldn't want someone yeah like

I literally look crazy. So if someone talked to me I'd be like what's wrong with you dude? You know? So I don't or like at the gym one time after yoga, I just finished, I'm sweating, I'm all gross, and this guy like approaches me to say something and I just go, no. And I kept walking. So like, again, if I'm like you, you'll know.

You don't need to hit on me. I think your next video should be you talking in the grocery store to yourself. That would be entertaining as shit. But the weirdest thing that I've ever done when I was flirting is I'm actually awkward with guys a lot of the time. Anyway, so when I was in college, I forget, maybe the first year, I was like trying to starting to flirt with guys. I was trying to flirt with this guy. And I was trying to look really cool. So I'm like trying to.

What? You said you really put that off. Wait until freshman year of college. I think I started flirting in like second grade. I don't know, recess. I was a late bloomer. I'm going to wait until college to do shit. So like I was like trying to like you know flirt

a little and then I put my glasses on. I kept talking to him and I kept feeling like I missed another one. John's really trying to make amends here and hit a bucket and you can't do it. You're sitting here embarrassing. Sorry. Continue. So as I was talking to this guy,

I was trying to look cool as I put my glasses on. Cause I thought I would look cute. And the lighting for some reason look different in both in each eye. And then in the middle of it, he goes, you're fucking with me. Right. And I go,

what? And he goes, you're doing this on purpose. And I go doing what? He goes, one of your glass things. What me, right? And I go, what? And he goes, you're doing this on purpose? And I go, doing what? He goes, one of your glass things, what is the glass, like the shade thing?

Yeah. Lens. One of your lenses is missing. And I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, it's a joke. You just had one lens and you're staring at the dude?

I mean, that would fuck with me so bad. Like, what is this girl? What is this girl doing That was really embarrassing My most embarrassing moment I was at the gym Oh you used to be an accountant right Yes

Yeah me too Before I was here So I was at This is a totally different life Because not only was I an accountant But I was at like the work gym And there was a cute girl Who like worked the desk

And I was like finally built up the courage I'm gonna go talk to her and she was at this desk and I tried to like be cool and kind of like sit on the desk you know just like kind of lean on it a little bit but it was like abnormally high it was just like like a normal desk is like I don't know three and a half feet it was like three and a little bit more feet and so I was, like standing up on my tiptoes and trying to like lean on it. But then I committed to it. I was like,

I just have to like stay here like this. So we were talking for a while and then she was like, this can't be comfortable. I was like, I'm going to go and I never went back to the gym. Never once.

Actually, I just remember I have the best story. Okay, I'll make it quick, but this is my favorite one. So when I was dating my ex-boyfriend, we were on and off and this is a pyramid we're off because I just dating my ex-boyfriend we're on and off and this is a pyramid

we're off because I just found out he was cheating on me with prostitutes. It's not. Actual prostitutes. I'm not like calling it. There was a back on

after this though, huh? No. Anyway. Anyway. I was like really upset about it. So we took a month break. Well, I didn't know any better. I had no self-esteem. I was like really upset about it. So we took a month break. Well, I didn't know any better.

I had no self-esteem. I was younger. So anyway, so we just broke up and he went to Vegas. Obviously, we knew what he was going to do in Vegas. I deleted his number. And then one night I went out and I got really wasted. So I had to put in his number manually. And I was like, I don't understand why you have to go to Vegas to fuck a bunch of prostitutes when I'm right here.

And then he didn't respond. So I was like, I forgot about it. The next day, I woke up and I got a text from him and he goes, I think you got the wrong number. And I was like, oh yeah, real clever. Good for you. Shut up. And he's like, no, I'm serious, miss.

I think you got the wrong number. My wife saw this text and she's very upset. I've never been to Vegas and I certainly never fucked any prostitutes. I have three kids and my wife thinks now i know you something like that and i was like oh you know what i missed a digit you're right this is the wrong number it's really funny do you know what that poor bastard like being like no no i swear it's a wrong number she was probably like get the fuck out of here, wrong number. I probably ruined the marriage, but that was hilarious. So worth it.

Good story, though. Worth it. Worth it. Wow. Let's do one more, and we'll let you get out of here. That's unbelievable. I know. All right, last voicemail is, oh, yeah, what's up?

It's fights, by the way. Last voicemail is brought to you by Blue Apron. Earlier in the episode, I talked about how I'm going out. I'm trying to change my life at some things. Another thing I'm doing is I'm cooking more. Blue Apron's helped me out with that because they deliver farm-fresh ingredients and step-by-step recipes to your door. Their mission is to make home cooking more accessible to everyone.

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you know, it's really awkward when you lend your friend something and then they say that you gave them it and you know, you don't know how to ask for it back. So instead you're just like,

okay, yeah, I'm going to let you have this. This is very specific. I let my friend, Christine Cookbook, and she texted me about it. I was like, oh, is that my cookbook? And she's like, no, you gave it to me. And I really want to be like, no, no, no, I didn't. But instead I just bought myself a new one.

What's wrong with girls? I just hate avoiding confrontation. I know Fights probably does this, but does anybody else do this? Is this just me? I don't know. Let me know. You would do this. Girls and Fights is crazy.

But I just know I'm doing it. The example I always use, one that comes up very regularly. You can tell maybe it's a problem. Maybe it's an issue. My sister stole my away luggage. And she just keeps going, yeah. She acknowledges the fact that it's mine and she will not be giving it back to me. Oh, at least she's saying it.

I think that girl's friend is pretending like she never took it. This cookbook is a problem. This cookbook is a problem. I feel like girls are worse. Like you talk about guys being not emotional and shit, but I feel like girls in these situations are way worse than guys. I think it depends. Like when I was younger, people have definitely taken my clothes and vice versa,

but now it's more like me and my friends will be like, hey, I want this. I'm taking it. I feel like that question sucked. Couldn't we have a better question? That girl was also talking so slow. We got one more. That's what ruined him for me the most she's like i hi guys i just listened

to the voicemail you received about the guy's fiance who deleted all the porn or blocked all the porn on his computer and you guys were like like you got to break up with this girl, which I completely agree with. However, my friend is in an interesting situation that I would be interested to hear your take on. And we don't have friends that we can consult because they're trying to keep it on the down low. But basically her boyfriend has been having like virtual sex and i don't know if this is with porn stars or hookers like i don't know what their official title is but basically they're getting paid to do this with him so my friend is really upset she feels like this was an act of cheating and i think if i was in her situation i would agree 2018 is wild similarly

but i'm kind of in a conflict because i don't see porn is cheating and i don't see strip clubs is cheating but this is like a combination of both and feels a lot more like cheating so we had a call a couple weeks ago yeah this this fiance found her guy's porn and was like blocked all the sites like you cannot go on porn sites but virtual sex I think I think yeah I think that's over the line

so you can't be you can't be having virtual sex what does that really mean like webcam girls is that what we're talking about okay so you're like talking and interacting with someone

over the internet no virtual sex is when you're animated and they're animated and then you guys are having sex you are into some wild shit, Violet. I bought my dad virtual...

What? I hate when I always get into the wrong sentences because I'm foreign. I bought my dad virtual reality stuff so I played video games on there. I'm not saying my dad's having sex with women there. I don't know what he's doing. The daddy issues.

I was so wrong about the daddy issues. Well, I think it's probably more like webcam girls, but do you think either of those is cheating? She said virtual. So you think it's cheating if you go virtual animated sex? I think that's aggressive because why can you just close your eyes when you're having sex and imagine it's someone else? I've never done that. Me neither. That's so much work. It's not realistic to me.

I can't convince myself that it's someone else. I feel like that's one of those things people always talk about. Yeah, I close my eyes and pretend it's someone else. Why? Yeah, that seems like

it's very hard to convince yourself when another person's inside of you. You're very stupid then. Who's inside of you? No, girl. Like I said, 2018 is wild. I think that's cheating, right? It seems like it's a step further.

Wait, I have a question. If you're going to pay for it, it's a little bit more. Yeah, that's true. Is going to happy places cheating? Happy endings? Yeah. Is that cheating?

I don't think I would consider. Well, it's so weird though because it's like a one-way street. Girls don't, you're not really going to happy places, are you? No. Yeah.

I didn't call it a happy place. I love love that i've never heard that but i love it that's what it is now i had one boyfriend that was going a lot and i and then i i was like is that cheating he was like no and i was like okay cool i mean it's just like like a regular massage it's like hey you're rubbing me and you're making like my shoulders feel good you're rubbing me and you're making my dick feel good well that's I'm just saying that would be the argument. I think it's a pretty strong argument. If someone else is making you cum, I think you can call that cheating.

I get that. I'm probably in the minority here. Then I've always been cheated on. All right, Milo. We appreciate you coming through. Thanks for having me. Daddy Issues underscore is the name.

Daddy Issues LA is the website. Daddy Issues LA is the website. Daddy Issues shop.com. Shop. Daddy Issues.com is the shop. And Violet Benson with a zero. Thank you, by the way. Thank you. That was fun.

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By the way, I calmed down from my showing, my Xavier Balvin concert, by going to see A Star is Born again on Sunday. Fourth time. I spent like $300 at A Star is Born. I think we need to have an intervention. I mean, I legitimately think I've spent $300 between tickets because once I went with five people,

I bought all their tickets. And then I've gone with Lou, I bought Lou's tickets. That's two, that's like 60, but oh, I bought $500

on the Star is Born. There's something wrong with you, Paul. When the sun goes down And the band won't play, I'll always remember us. There's a way, way up when you look at me and the whole world fades. I'll always remember us

this way ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh Thank you.