KFC Radio - Diplo || Feits Get's Overwhelmed Watching Football on RedZone

Episode Date: September 12, 2023

Timecodes: 0:00 Start 10:54 Sean Strickland's legendary post-game speech 16:40 Keegan got kicked out of little league 29:57 Why Feits doesn't like Red Zone 36:05 Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis 41:53 More of Feits being gross 44:06 One Time Segments Segment 46:49 Since when did dogs get all these rights? 55:50 Feits' Dream 59:26 What's the dumbest thing people called you g*y for? 01:05:17 The rise of the third mic 01:12:05 Video Voicemails ++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Gametime: Download the Gametime app or go to https://gametime.co, enter your email, and redeem code KFC for $20 off your first purchase (terms apply). Pirate Water: Go to https://drinkpiratewater.com to find Pirate Water in a location near you or order on gopuff Marine Layer: Get 15% off with the code KFC15 at https://Marinelayer.com. Straight Talk: Learn More at https://www.straighttalk.com/multiline?utm_medium=BAC&utm_campaign=AW&utm_content=EVRGRN&utm_term=GNRC-%25epid!_%ecid!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Oof! Vroom! Vroom! Vroom! Now we go over to Cincinnati! Vroom!

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Vroom! Vroom! AFC Radio on the Barstool Sports Network. I, I, uh, you know how it's ridiculous that I'm a father? Yeah. Just, like, utterly absurd. Just, like, it'll just never be normal that I have kids and shit. And I know that, for a fact. And I, and I keep waiting for it

to maybe change. Like one day set in? Yeah, and it just doesn't. And every single day, I'm reminded that it's ridiculous that I'm a father. But not because of me. I think I'm the normal one. I think the other, the parenting world is the weird – they're the weird ones. In my little experience with it, I would agree. Right?

So – and I'm always seeing these things, just like little nuances and things about the parenting world that I'm learning. Although, sorry to interrupt. I would say, I said in my little experience, now that I think about it, kids and parents alike, I don't know which one of them, maybe it's both of them, are kind of gangster. Like when I used to beat the shit out of kids, no one used to say nothing. Well, you're a camp counselor? I was a camp counselor. No one fucking told me. I don't know if the kids would complain to the parents and the parents wouldn't care

or the kids would keep their mouth shut, but no one. I didn't know if the kids would complain to the parents and the parents wouldn't care or the kids would keep their mouth shut, but no one, I didn't get talked to once. I beat the shit out of kids for like five years. It was a different time, bro. It was a different time

and that actually ties in nicely. It ties in nicely to this because I know it sounds like cliche and whatnot, but there are times where I'm just reminded of like in my day sort of shit you know. I just watch the parents.

You know. More specifically. Stereotypically but just factually speaking. The mothers. Go crazy over things. And the latest is. They just randomly. Installed a vending machine.

In my kids school. And it's like they wanted to just. Drop a vending machine in my kids' school. And it's like they wanted to just drop a stick of dynamite in a fucking room full of gunpowder. It is... I can't think of anything, like, more... Like, you don't have to do this, you know? Like, what do you need this fucking vending machine for?

That is now going to be the biggest fucking headache for them, but I am relishing every single second of it. Why does having a vending machine matter? One way or the other? Because they, it has like real candy and good snacks in it. Yeah.

And the parent, the moms are not happy about that. And I love it. It's, it's dude. It's like there there's, there's a WhatsApp chat with all the parents. I,

and again, I, I know. Well, I, but I, I, i like to be in these things uh i i've always said before like when when when you're divorced it's like if you're not in the household when you don't hear any of that yes so i'm like i gotta be on some of these email

chains and these and these text chains and stuff so but then i also just love it for my entertainment value uh i never chime in but one day i'm thinking about just dropping, just like playing devil's advocate in there. But they're just like, what's going on with this vending machine? There's no nutritional value. And my kids keep coming home and asking for money to spend in the vending machine. And this person's got to be responsible. And we've got to email this person. And then so it's all these moms.

And they're all just saying the same thing over and over again. No one's saying anything of value. They're just repeating themselves. And then the principal's all these moms and they're all just saying the same thing over and over again. No one's saying anything of value, which is they're just repeating themselves. And then the principal wrote an email and kind of clapped back. And I was like, fuck, yeah, let's go. So now I'm just I want to I want to maybe like I think I'm going to get involved somehow and be like, first of all, pop tarts are catching strays. Pop tarts are what the parents are really focused on. It's part of a healthy breakfast. A Pop-Tart is as healthy as it got in my house, bro.

Oh, sorry. You guys didn't have dessert with breakfast? Yeah. Have you heard of fruit filling? Thank you very much. Those are breakfast pastries, and they deserve to be treated with respect. We could talk about some of the other things. Maybe the nutritional value is not there, but Pop-Tarts is not the one.

But the principle was like, we're going to take some of the things out. We'll replace it with some healthy snacks. Like the candy is getting taken out, but the snacks, they stay. You know what you should do? Recommend mango slices. Not just a bag of wet mango slices. Just so you guys know, mango slices are pretty hot in the streets right now. By the way, I went over to Feist's to go film a sketch.

And as soon as I walked in, he gave me one of the mango popsicles. Good. I understand where he's coming from. The popsicles that you made. It was not refrozen, so it was a standard popsicle, but it was just the mango. But it was good. So you walked out and I was like, you gotta eat this. And he was like, 10 out of 10.

I mean, it sounds like, you know, it's like refreshment on a stick. You know what I mean? With a little spice. What did you say you said? There's just endless amounts of flavor. It keeps it coming back from the bottom. Dude, who's the brand? Who's the brand that sells these fucking outshine outshine

we just gave you we just gave you the tagline of a millennium there's endless amounts of flavor like give me the address we'll send the invoice fucking a uh but the the principal wrote wrote an email being like we'll get rid of the, but the snacks are staying because, like, shut the fuck up. And she was like, I just think back to last year when Hot Takis took the school by storm and the smiles on all the kids' faces when they were able to get Hot Takis. And, like, it was a great moment. I was like, hell yeah, bitch. Let's go. Let's go.

Those are my kind of moments. Sorry I'm making your kids fucking happy. Yeah. Sorry. Sorry. Like, you know, we gave children the joy of a snack you fucking assholes and then kind of like ended with like a like a sub like a sub tweet kind of being like and by the way how about you parent your own fucking kids yeah like just tell your kids no you don't you if you don't want them spending money on the vending machine don't give them money and like that that was a big

complaint was like my it's annoying. My kids come home, and they're asking me for money because so-and-so had M&Ms that they got from the vending machine today. I don't know. Say fucking no to them. Yeah, having kids is fucking annoying. Right. Yeah, no fucking kidding. When you send your kids out into the world, there's going to be a bunch of shit that maybe you have to prepare them for.

And I think if we're getting beat by vending machines that we as a uh parental society are failing if vending machines are our again you brought it up last last uh episode like it's not getting mowed down by machine guns it's the vending machines that we're going to talk about that's that's going to be the outrage let's worry about that i I almost want to be like donate another one to the school or something. Have a plaque on it donated by the Clancy family and have it loaded with Entenmann's and all

the good shit. Mangoes. What was that fucking video game at arcades where you'd step and your cop shield would pop up? Yeah. Yeah. Donate that. You're like, video games and candy in this room. It's got the cock action on it.

Thank Shay's dad. I said next, I hope they put in a cigarette vending machine. Pulling those fucking... Those are awesome. If you go to a bar that still has one of those sitting in there, you're in the right place. Buy it. And you'll be able to afford to. Most of them are defunct or whatever.

They don't even work. I meant the bar. Oh, by the whole bar. By the whole bar. By the whole place. Dude, the thought of going to a bar, I mean, it must have only been really functioning when cigarettes were worth like five bucks, so you could put like a five or a ten in there. Because now you'd have to put like two tens, five and a one yeah i don't know five yeah like

it like like i don't even remember what because it just wouldn't make logical sense to have actually nowadays i i thought one of the things i thought was funny when when i saw it for the first time was like vending machines that have like 200 headphones and shit yeah like in airports and stuff it's like you could really just put anything in a vending machine if you wanted to. You can just fucking, you can basically get a car that way. It'll just show up at your house now. But the idea of being at the bar

and being like, ah, shit, forgot my smokes. Like give me a five and you just crank that fucking, pull that thing. Which like isn't a ton, but like whenever I do,

because I feel I don't buy that often, I have to buy a lighter too. It's like 24 bucks or something like that. Is it really not? I remember it being like, maybe something like 18. like 18 i forget yeah i remember it when it hit like 14 15 people were like uh what the fuck yeah and i'm sure it's only and i was like that's like 10 years ago at least where like it started getting uh getting crazy with it the tax or whatever so yeah i'm sure it's they should just make it like 30 because people guess what they'll buy it it's called an addiction yeah they will pay whatever they need to so uh but yeah the great vending machine war is is burning white hot i

just i don't i also want to be like like yo i've seen your kids at birthday parties. They live on Doritos. Your kids run on Nacho Cheese Doritos. I see him. He's got the fucking white, the red shit all over his face. I know your kids. I know that she eats this and he eats that. And now all of a sudden you're going to be, you know, the health department. Get the fuck out of here. That's okay.

I guess, like, it's just give them healthy food sometimes and let them have snacks sometimes. I don't know if parents know this. It seems like it's really easy. I mean – And also tell them yes sometimes and no sometimes. Yeah, right. That works also. Speaking for non-parents, two parents, we look at it and go, that looks super easy.

Yeah, when people are complaining – It looks like it sucks, but it looks like you either go no or yes. And that's about it. You have to, you can flip a coin every time it's a big decision. I also think, um, for the most, like the stuff that, that the parents complain about being hard is not hard. And the stuff that's hard doesn't get enough.

Really? Yeah. Like what? Like, like, like every new parent going through like the sleep, going through no sleep, sleep deprivation is like, I didn't know it was going to be this hard. And I'm like, I was screaming from the mountaintops being like,

it fucking ruins your life. You and your spouse will be pushed to the brink. You will be unhealthy. You'll be tired. You'll suffer at work. You'll be miserable. Like all that. And, and like, like to me like the snack issue is like i don't who fucking cares you know i'll make them a nice dinner and bro do you know how hard it is to like fuck up a person dude i always

point out there's the there's that there's that um there's a documentary those those kids in brazil that literally eat garbage to stay alive and i'm like if those kids can survive eating actual trash i think they eat like styrofoam and shit uh your kid will be okay having a bag of doritos every night like it is no big deal i'm not even talking physically physically it's almost impossible but also like man it's so hard to fuck up a person dude they're like dude they're there it's just like just be don't strive for just be like i don't know sometimes you do bad shit sometimes you do good shit okay that's what a person is my perfect segue to my new favorite person do you know sean strickland the mma guy who just i know yeah have you seen you're gonna love this i just started following him sean strickland

biggest upset in MMA history, beats Stylebender, becomes the middleweight champ. And he did a post-game or a post-match press conference. Bro. They ask him, like, the dumbest, one of the dumbest, like, you know. I guess I don't know him all that well, but you'll find out about him in a second. Like, I guess his story is really, like, you know, he guess I don't know him all that well, but you'll find out about him in a second. Like, I guess his story is really like, you know, he went through trials and tribulations to get there.

To go from everything you've been through to now holding that belt that says you're the baddest man in the world on the planet. But what do you think about that? Yeah, thank God for child abuse, right? Fuck yeah. My depressed memories. Fucking, you really, you got me to where I needed

to be, man. Yeah, dude, you were fucking awesome, man. All of the

years of abuse, you really, you really made me the man I had to be today. I fucking know you guys.

I fucking know you guys. How awesome is that, dude, man? That is so fucking great.

And his captions are even funnier. He goes, Dana White, quote, Izzy, you had one job. He goes, so how does this work? Do I just go woke? Nike? China? Money? I'm ready.

Let's go, man. Let's sell out. Yo, Wheaties, put me on that damn box. What a fucking legend. Yeah, I'm obviously completely fucked mentally and emotionally i fight humans for a living they put me in a cage and i try and kill a man and you guys like it things weren't great things could have gone differently man if it if it wasn't for the fucking vending machine in middle school and in elementary school,

I wouldn't be beating humans' faces for a living today. You know, the other thing is that school goes from fucking kindergarten to eighth grade. So, like, eighth graders need fucking snacks, bro. They need snacks. Like, yeah. We had, I think my middle school had vending machines. My high school had, well, my first high school definitely had Had vending machines My high school had Well my first high school

Had definitely had vending machines Second high school Had a whole building Thanks The It's called tuck shop Really You could just go

You had cookies Cakes Fucking candies But that's also For the people Because people were Living there right Yeah yeah yeah

So that makes a little more sense Because it's like You gotta give them something When they go home I guess But like I I mean, when I was in school, we had, I can't even imagine. I don't know what the real food is like now. But like we had fucking deep fried fries like in the fucking fryer. You know, we had all that shit.

Deli sandwiches, like fake cheese steaks with like monkey meat in it. And then we had big fat chocolate chip cookies that were like undercooked. They were 60 cents. They were amazing. There were 60 fucking cents. I would buy like 10 of them. Like that's lunch today. I was eating these cookies, man.

And nobody said a fucking word. Look how we turned out. You should just pretend like as a bit. You'll probably get more parents agreeing with you than you think. Like you haven't learned any new information since like the 70s. Like with the pop-tart stuff like i don't know reagan's complete breakfast yeah ketchup was a vegetable so it checks out tomato right yeah man you know what it's crazy to think as i was just thinking of those prices like fries were 90 cents the cookies were 60 and i remember like i i feel so fucking old being able like i'm gonna tell my kids stories

of like i was paying with change my kids have no idea of changes they they have no fucking clue what dude metal money is europe and they're like damn yeah right right yeah for real that that they're like if i asked them now like what is how much is a penny quarter dime they'd be like we don't even know what those are. God damn. The things I throw at the cashier after? I don't know. Yeah. The garbage that they hand me?

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or go to the website, enter your email and redeem code kfc for 20 off your first purchase terms apply uh so i yeah i i um thinking about just diving in and making like a one minute man video about it or something redact some names and whatnot but whenever I talk about like... Oh, by the way, so I tweeted over the weekend Keegan got kicked out of his Little League. I saw that. Well, I was going to ask you about it, but I figured you've got to do it from a microphone. I mean, I kind of did it on purpose

to make this happen, and now I'm complaining about it, so whatever. But like, the amount of people tweeting me being like this is nothing to be proud of like like this is so this is blah blah blah i'm like bro you got kicked out because of a fucking township zoning borders i just like had a little fun with it bro and beat a child with that right like god you know but i i used to all the time too right like i'd be like i'm gonna piss

people off with this and people get pissed i'm what the fuck? You fucking – But it's just like – Well, now I'm annoyed. It backfired. Everything backfired. But it's like, you know, just shut the fuck up. How about that? Giving me, you know, the parenting – reading me the parenting riot act. It's like, yeah, we're born on the – he was born on – lives on the other side of the border.

Shut the fuck up. But it was a big – no, it's literally a border. No, I know about it. Oh, yeah. But the – it was funny because like – big, no, it's literally a border. Like, no, I know about it. Oh yeah. But the, uh, it was funny. Cause like,

wait, what do you mean? Literally a border. America doesn't have borders. I was going to say, borders are imaginary. I didn't just weld them open. By the way,

one of my favorite running things. Now, if you guys have not, if you're KFC radio fans and you have not switched over to Barstona radio during the days yet please do tommy trump is one of the best things like tommy when he ran for barcelona new york president took on the trump persona and he just hasn't let it go i think he's just a republican now it's great but uh the uh i was gonna do another one minute man on on more childhood drama. This is another thing I just can't wrap my head around.

And I knew this was the case. We all know this. Childhood sports is out of control. One of the teams in my son's league, the 15-year-olds, where you're getting pretty serious at that point. You're a high school baseball player.

You've got to be serious. Right almost a junior i think i was a junior no sophomore so i didn't get my i didn't get my license till senior year though so would i be 16 yeah i turned 18 right before i went to high school uh college i was an 18 august of college so i was 17 when i was a sophomore so i I guess I was still a sophomore, yeah. But they didn't have one kid on the team from the proper town. Really? Not one. They had a full – what it is is there's three towns that are eligible to be in this league. But then within – if you live within those towns and you go to a private school, you're still allowed to go because it's like we can't tell you –

if your parents wanted to send you to private school but you live in the same town yeah we can't tell you where to send your kids but then kids who go to that same school who don't live in the town are like oh i go to that same school too so i'm eligible and they kind of just like let that slide for like years and years and years so there's all you know iona and all these these schools these private schools that have kids from the Bronx and New Rochelle. And these coaches take it so seriously. They just recruit these kids who are fucking like Danny Alamante status. So the league eventually was like, we pay.

I think the league was like, we pay for all the fields and the upkeep and the this and the that. And then all these kids who don't pay any of those taxes are benefiting and i think when they found out not one kid was eligible they were like this is this is bullshit so that i think that coach filed a lawsuit and that forced the the league to then play like hardball back and be like boom line in the sand like if you're not within these town borders everybody's out including like all i want is just keegan to play with the same kids play like hardball back and be like boom line in the sand like if you're not within these town borders everybody's out including like all i want is just keegan to play with the same kids he's been playing with yeah he has a bunch of friends now that all of a sudden he's not gonna be able to play and they cashed our registration checks and didn't tell us till like a week before the

season started so now all the other tryouts from other leagues were closed so you had a bunch of fucking parents were roaring on that one. But it was like, this guy's an asshole for filing a lawsuit. And these guys are fucking assholes for ruining, you know, six-year-old's times. Like, you could just be like, I don't know, the babies can still play t-ball. And we got to figure it out for the older kids. Like, there's just no common sense anymore. There's just no common sense with anything anymore.

Everything has to be black and white. And it's just like, I was like, oh, fuck this guy. Then I heard their side of the story. I was like, oh, fuck that guy. Fuck both you people. Just let my five-year-old kid play. Just let my kid play with his friends, you dumb assholes. It just doesn't take, you can just look at it, be like, 12 years old and up.

It has to be really serious. I don't know. Everyone else can just fucking dick around. Yeah. Once you have puberty, you take a seat. Yeah, done. That's it. Because some people would probably say, well, where do you draw the line?

Is it 12? Is it 11? Is it 10? The biological line. Yeah, done. The line God drew. Yeah, when people start throwing a little bit harder, I think you throw a breaking ball.

Done. I don't know. Fucking jerk-offs. But, yeah, I mean's I've been watching from afar all of this for the last seven years now and I think I'm just biding my time before I dive in and just go full

Joker just straight Heath Ledger just like as the Joker I would have put like the parents on one boat and the little league on another boat and be like who's to blow each other up? And here we go. That's all I want to do is burn down my town with just psychological torture of all these assholes.

It's fucking unbelievable. It's as bad as advertised. When you see some of those stories and shit, you're like, how bad can it be? It's again, these people completely completely lack common sense all of them that that would make me that that's the main reason I don't know there's a lot of main reasons I don't have kids that would be drive me up a what are you

talking about it's just like like the I saw a clip the other day like someone get like a catcher tag the kid in the head and a mom went nuts and it was like, was that necessary? And they just stormed the field, and parents were screaming. Tag on the head. Yeah.

I knew, I guess, and obviously you're seeing clips, or you're seeing the worst of it, so it makes you think worse, blah, blah, blah. But every league had one of those parents. But it seems like- There are all those parents. Right? Yeah. There was always a group. I always say, I think, like, probably one of the reasons I am the way I am is, like, we had this group of dads.

Come to all our hockey games, come to all our practices, lose their minds. Like, legit would be drunk at, like, 8 a.m. Like, not like I'd be drinking a beer Like it wasn't Like new drunk That day drunk They were drinking And they'd be like hanging over the glass

And screaming But by the way they're cool guys By the way they're my heroes I want to be them They were fucking awesome dudes But like they They would do that And they would pound on the glass

And shit like that And my dad would always just sit in the corner And just read the paper And I was always like it's cool that dad's not doing that But those guys are cool too But what it is It's awesome to be you It sucks to, like that – it's awesome to be you. It sucks to be those kids.

But it's awesome to be like, I have a dad that doesn't do this, but I'm happy yours do because this shit's funny. It's awesome. That's really what it's all about. I don't want to have to live that, but I want to laugh at it. But again, I want to stress, those dudes are the men. And when we went away on hockey trips, you know what crew my dad hung out with? Bang. Just not on regular Saturday mornings.

Right, totally. Guys, there's a time and a place for this behavior. I'm down with it. It's just not on Saturday morning. That's awesome. That is great yeah there is there is part of me that i'll tell you this much i'm either gonna stay exactly as i am like very removed or i'm gonna dive in head first and be like that guys you know what i mean no half measures like i'll go become

a full fucking baseball dad before i'm ever like Eh kind of in the mix I'm either gonna be just chilling Or I'm gonna be like You fucking struck out again Screaming at the umpires and shit There is something fun about just being like Like doesn't people have to know they're assholes And they just don't care

Or do you think they go home and they're like Do you think they go home and they're like Wait what's the big deal honey Do you think they go home and they say like Oh my god that was so embarrassing Or do you think they go home and go like Fuck yeah what's the big deal honey do you think they go home and they say like oh my god that was so embarrassing or you think they go home and go like fuck yeah and i'll do it again i think that one fuck yeah i'll do it again yeah i think you know i was about something today i forgot i was reading this story someone and it was like one of those things like a very

cliche line where it's like this person has every reason to be a dickhead like they're famous and they're young and they're cool oh yeah yeah like right. That just gives you a pass to be a fucking asshole. Like, of course. Anyone would be like, of course he's an asshole. He's got everything to him. And I, like, for some reason when I read it that time, I was like, I actually, I always agree with it. And I've probably said it a million times.

And for some reason, it's time where I was like, I reject that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't just get the pass. No one. But even that, like, no, no. Because I was thinking that about him with that arrest being like, you know, all 16 of his songs were like the top one through 16 of the Billboard number one album. No, but it was like. Taylor does that kind of stuff.

I mean, he had a lot. Yeah. He had all 16 were in the top 100. All like five were in the top 20, including number one. I mean, he had it going on. And I was like, yeah, if you got a little mouthy with a cop, I could understand that happening. But then when I saw it happen, I was like, he shouldn't have done that. And he knew it, too.

He was just like, oh, fuck. I don't want to go to jail. But they have every reason to be a dick. No one has every reason. Because reason one is just don't. Don't do it. That's it. You just don't don't do like that's it you just don't it's just there there is just a choice yeah to be one or not be one doesn't matter how given everything is like how not even not given given the right word earned

or whatever like how what you had like there's always you never have reason number one don't right just don't it's very i like that reason number one don't. It's very sad. I like that. Reason number one, don't. That applies to being an asshole. That applies to everything. Just don't. It's like, I don't know. You could just not cause a scene. You could just not say that to that person. You could just not make that, you know, just don't.

Don't be a dickhead. Dude, I like that a lot. Reason number one, don't. Reason number one, no. Don't. I have said it ten times now. I don't know. It seems really easy. Just don't be an one no don't i i've said it 10 times now i don't know it seems really easy just don't be an asshole to people because at the end of the like and i and you know what and when you have like if you have you've been dealt a really shitty hand like a guy like sean strickland

was like channeled it into something i guess good you know what i mean like like even even if things are really bad when you do have a free pass to like not i, I'm not just talking like you're rich and you're famous. Like I was abused and all that shit. And you know, people always say like, those are the people who turn around and commit like all these heinous acts and shit. It's like, but there are people who go through that and, and don't, and don't do it. So, you know, that's a little bit of a different story where you're like, you're fucked up in the head, but like you always can choose to just not.

Dude, not doing anything is the easiest thing to do. Oh that's the other thing too you know what's like so much easier than like being a rapist just like hanging out in your house not being just chilling raping people is so fucking hard and convoluted and and this messy thing it's just like you could just stay on your couch and i don't know, watch Netflix. Of all the things I've done in my life, I'd probably say not raping has been the easiest. Cause the least amount of sweat. I will put a guarantee on it. John's tornado.

I will never rape anybody. And not even out of the morality, just out of the effort. Just out of the effort. There might come a day where I'm going to go, you know what, I want to take that i want to take that but i'm not gonna i'm not gonna just because it's a whole big thing it's a whole production i don't want to do this song and dance all right it's a whole dog and pony show to rape somebody so i'm just gonna chill on my couch really though you know that should be the that should be a new argument that we throw in there for why people shouldn't rape like judges should be like you're aware it throw in there for why people shouldn't rape.

Judges should be like, you're aware it's 2023, the amount of entertainment you have at your fingertips. Back in the day, you're a caveman. You're just like, I'm going to kill that animal, and I'm going to fuck that thing. And now it's like... Caveman rape's okay. Caveman rape was... You can't apply today's morality to the whole of this. Can you even consent if you don't even have language yet? You know what I mean?

Come on. But nowadays, like, man, have you been on the internet? Have you seen streaming services? All the music, all the entertainment? TikTok? Have you been on TikTok? Have you tried TikTok before you raped somebody? Judges should have no leniency.

They should just be like, you're going to jail for life because you could have been on TikTok instead of raping that girl. No. TikTok. I actually thought of yesterday the – I found out why I don't like Red Zone. Yeah. That was your hot take. That was your spiciest. Bro, I remember writing this blog back in Milton and Dave yelling downstairs, what the fuck is this?

And I was like, I don't know. I don't really like Red Zone. It's an emotion that I have. It's an opinion and a feeling that I exude. I think Dan even texted me and was like, we've all been Gchat back in the day. He's like, what the fuck? I was like, I don't know. It's too much for me.

It's like, dude, and I try every year. I try again. I tried again for the first like Half hour yesterday And it was like Now we go over to Cincinnati I was like I was like what the fuck is happening I'd rather watch the 13 to 3 game just play out

Than like It's like it's you're under attack You're under attack I felt like I was Dude I'm sure it was probably a little bit worse I felt like I was at Pearl Harbor play out. It's like, it's you're under attack. You're under attack. Dude, I'm sure it was probably a little bit worse. I feel like I was at Pearl Harbor. I was like, what the fuck is always happening right now? There's so much going on. I just want

to fucking chill. It's Sunday afternoon, you goddamn animals! Bro, I did not think a human representation of Red Zone would be that funny. Let's go over to Cincinnati! Why is Scott Hanson yelling at me? I haven't even had lunch yet. That is so good, man. Uh-oh, everyone, Titans just got into the red zone.

I'm like, shut up! Even just the notion of like, somebody's crossed the 20-yard line. We got to go there. They've crossed an imaginary line. Get us a camera in there right now. It is funny, though, how well Red Zone's natural balance works out. There's only like a couple times where they have to go like eight screens. And everyone's like, holy shit, it's happening.

For the most part, there's only a couple at a time. It's a very natural order of things in Red Zone. And guess what? Sometimes you miss good stuff. Had I not been watching the Browns game, I would not have watched a – I don't know who commentators are, but whatever a commentator was, just step all over his dick. What are you saying?

Because this is a quote. The Browns have just scored or whatever. Speaking of the Browns, very weird how upset that franchise gets at being called exactly what their mascot is. What is that mascot? It's an elf! His name is Elfie!

I heard it wasn't actually an elf. I'm 99% sure his name is Elfie. I'm going to say I'm 100% sure his name is Elfie. Maybe it's Brownie the elf. Brownie is probablyfie. Maybe it's Brownie the Elf. Brownie is probably it. I think it's Brownie the Elf. That makes more sense. Brownie the Elf.

It's at the 50 yard line. It's on all your merch. It's an elf. He called you the Elf. You're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, buddy. Let's have some decorum here. Don't call us exactly what we are did you see the dude uh the bangles guy his quote jamar chase yeah great is that who it was that's awesome that is fucking hilarious um but i think the browns have just scored or whatever they maybe

deshaun watson just made a nice pass and whoever the commentator was was like this is the freest i've seen deshaun watson play since he decided not to play back in 2021 and i was like oh did he decide oh is that what it was that a tough decision for him to make he just made a personal choice he's decided to sit out for him i'm glad he overcame whatever made him decide to give up on his dream for a year. That is fucking great. The report for today's episode comes from Marine Layer. It's official.

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What did you think of Ashton and Mula? That stuff makes me very uncomfortable. Oh, I thought – No, just like – Oh, yeah. By the way, Aggie, come on, man. What?

Oh, yeah. And by the way, Kevin, come on, man. That – For those who aren't aware Someone tweeted at Kevin Kevin was in a bit of a war Saying you should never write those kind of letters And someone said What if fights did it

And Kevin said I wouldn't write a letter What the fuck Bro If you Another KFC radio Stamp on this one If you get convicted of rape radio stamp on this one, if you get convicted of rape, you're on your own, bro. You are on your own.

If they asked me, I'd be like, he's always nice to me. What was he like? I don't know, but he's nice to me. You know what? That actually is fair. If someone asked me the question, what do you think of him? I'd say, he's never raped me. Never even came close.

I never knew him to be a racist. He's a nice guy. If someone asked me to legally pen a letter on the record, I would say go fuck yourself. I will write that on the record for you. I will say he never raped me. I was never even care about the... I understand what's going on here. I get that they're a close friend.

I know that it was a long time ago. I know that there's not a lot of evidence. It's a weird situation. But just from a PR point of view, you've got to be out of your fucking mind. Yeah. I would be like, I even want to do this for you, dude,

because you fucked up or whatever. You really fucked up, out of your fucking mind yeah like i would be like i even want to do this for you dude because like you fucked up or whatever like you really fucked up but you've lived an amazing life otherwise and like but i'm just not going to submit a letter to a like another body of you know another place that's gonna for sure become public saying your honor go easy on this rapist i'm just not gonna do it even if Even if I believe, like people are like, oh, you don't like, you know, you wouldn't, even if you really felt that way, you wouldn't write it? No.

No, there's a ton of things I believe and feel that I don't put on the record. Trust me on that. I'm obviously kidding. But like, I'd probably write a, I wouldn't write a letter for a convicted rapist. Yada, yada, yada. But if they were like, can you just put into your own words your experience with him?

I'd be like, yeah, I don't know why any of this matters, but it seemed nice to me. Like, why does my experience with him matter? Like, if they did it with murderers, like, dude, this guy killed 100 people. Never killed me. When he came into my pizza shop, he was always a very pleasant man. Right. So what? That was a time that he wasn't murdering.

He did the crime, right? So what does this matter? It really is so crazy. And, like, I really hated the – Ashton Kutcher was like, you know, basically think about his daughter. Think about the fucking daughter of – Yeah, yeah, yeah. The father of the daughter.

No, we're thinking about all the other daughters. Right. Which is why we're putting him in jail right right it's just it's crazy and i mean that's just it's just a wild one from a dude who i mean i you know i gushed over ashton i was like our number one guest ever he was so cool and then i was like whoa that was a misstep particularly for somebody who is like super involved in sex trafficking not that they're the same but they are but they're they are similar there's similarities to be uh when it comes to having like the empathy and the sympathy and the right like thought process. Like I understand people who's thinking, but he's their friend and blah, blah, blah.

It's just that's the wrong way of thinking. You have to come over here and think about it this way. You would have thought those people would be thinking like the right way on this one, but they weren't. Did you see the tweet? You've got to think, though, that they were like, like, you know, these are not going to be public, right?

Right? Right? You swear to me they're not going to be public? They're not going to be public. They're not going to be public. Ah, they were public! Like, of course it's going to happen. You guys have been super famous for like your whole fucking life.

You have to know this is going to become public. This tweet was so funny. It says, I know their PR told them to sit in front of innocuous, normal person looking wall. But unfortunately for them, I have also watched their Architectural Digest house tour and know exactly where this was filmed. Wow. That's maybe the best tweet of all time.

That is great. If you're listening, the picture, it looks like they're just behind like a wooden wall but in front of that is this beautiful infinity pool with these floating chairs beautiful landscape and all this shit i mean and by the way i you know what would actually be a really funny skit that you could do something like this without a border the posts post video scenes from ashton and mila because i envisioned ashton going you didn't watch it i didn't know that i envisioned ashton going like the fuck was that because he was like all right so um all right you know like being very natural and mila kunis was like we have worked so hard over the years

in our foundation to prevent this sort of thing from happening we would never want this to happen to anybody else and they actually kind of looked at her like yeah so danny like he was just being like acting he was acting but making it sound natural yeah she was just fucking reading off and i i actually thought about him probably in his head going, another take. Yeah, take three. Take ten. I mean, it was, whoo. I don't know what you do after you write a letter to prop up a convicted rapist, but it ain't that video.

It ain't that, man. That one you got to just be like, just disappear for like, you know, pull a Mean Girls, disappear for a year. Hopefully people just stop talking about that shit. Before we go to voicemails, can you just go like this with your finger? Is it still there? What is that?

What? All this stuff up here? It's like black. God damn it, Kevin. I have glue all over my fucking head. It's like in your ear. That's going to be in there.

I've been dumping acetone on my head for fucking a whole weekend yeah glue everywhere it's a nightmare yeah you got it i was like does that i thought it was gonna be food i was i genuinely i was like is that soap sometimes i get soap stuck there but it was like black and then there was john this is a legitimate thought i thought that it might have been food i don't know how you would get food in your ear but it was like black. And then there was – John, this is a legitimate thought. I thought that it might have been food. I don't know how you would get food in your ear, but that was – that being a real thought is kind of scary. Oh, okay. So the other day I went to – Oh, no.

Oh, no. This isn't that bad. Oh, boy. I went into the – I woke up, went to the – I don't know. Here's what I'm trying to say is I'd been outside, and now I've probably gone to the gym. And then I'd come home, and I was shirtless in front of the mirror, about to take a shower to put clothes on and go back out. And I went like this with my hair or something like that.

And I was like, where did all that chocolate come from? Oh, my God. And I was like, that must be chocolate. And I went, it's chocolate. I didn't even have a guess. Dude. Dude. You had no idea?

You weren't like, oh, I was eating that candy bar in bed. It has to be that. You could eat it any time. Oh, I was eating that candy bar in bed. It has to be that. You could eat it any time. Oh, I was eating that candy bar describes most of my life. Bro, I'll never forget that you tried to shame me for ice cream. And this is the life you lead. I buy the candy bars individually. I take three to four trips to the market per week.

Not individually. I buy big market per week. Not individually. I buy big bags. I buy those individually. I don't buy five at a time. All right. Wait, real quick. I got a couple one-time segments. Okay.

There is... We lead the league. We lead the fucking world in one-time segments. Well, here's the deal, dude. They fucking told us we had to make segments to make it sellable. For fucking seven years, they've never sold a single segment. So there's no reason to have segments. I was at a meeting last week, and the new girl said to Bree and Grace,

you got to make segments so we can sell them. They're not going to sell, Bree and Grace. Don't do it. I went like this. I went... I'm not going to do it right now, but I wanted to be like, no, you gotta make segments so they can sell them. They're not gonna sell Bree and Grace, don't do it. I went like this, I went I'm not gonna do it right now but I wanted to be like, no you don't! You don't have to make segments, they will not sell them. And that's not to say they haven't done sales but they will not sell the segments.

It's not a segment. They never sell a segment. It's never the segment. There's no reason for a segment in podcast. If your podcast has segments tell them to stop, there's no need. Okay. How stupid is that? Advertisers need you to say a sentence in the beginning. Like, now today's next segment named XYZ.

We're just going to drop a minute clipping. Right. Done. The podcast works. Shut up. So when I wake up at like 6.30 I usually wake up And I kind of like

Do whatever but I fall asleep pretty quick But I always remember that like hour and a half Of like back asleep And it's always like really dumb stuff But like it's kind of like Almost like all high Wait you're talking about you remember your dream? Yeah I guess it's kind of a dream

I'll tell you what I don't know if this is a thing. That, what you're describing, is the best sleep I get. Oh, it's the worst. I don't get any sleep. But do you sleep well in that hour? No. So I kick and toss and turn all night, existential dread the whole nine. I'll wake up at like five or six and go back to bed from like five to seven or something like that and then when i wake up at

seven i'm like oh i'm so groggy because i think i just like i i think i like swan dive into the sleep i suicide into sleep and then i gotta come back out of it for the day and i'm like why did you do this in the middle of the night we had all the time in the world all the time in the world um but like i've always like i remember it basically it's like being hot where i'm like i remember being like I remember being like I remember turning Like I For some reason

I always turn the TV back on That like I turned off At some point in the night Um I get snacks And all this stuff And uh I cook a feast

The uh But the other Sometimes Not sometimes But the other day I had I remember Like giggling

And I was like laughing to myself. And the only reason I'm retelling this is because I told it to Trent. We had the boys went to lunch on Saturday, me, Nate, Trent, and Tommy. Oh, that sounds awesome. That's the stuff I miss the most. I don't want to party, but I want to do shit like that. Bro, we went – okay. Oh, no.

We've been dibbling and dabbling. I'll get back to my Half dream But the We went to lunch And Tommy did something weird No Two

Actually two very funny things happened Well one very funny thing One I think I gotta Just finally say Oh god The One was

I got there like 15 minutes early 2 2.15 lunch Preservation I got there at like 2 And I knew no one else was going to be there. So I just waited across the street and like leaned against this building in the shade.

It's hot out. And I just stood there for 10 minutes or so. And it was like, I forget. It's not Barrow. It's whatever's right after Barrow, but whatever. And it's like kind of a dead end.

And I was kind of just sitting there zoned out, and I see this figure standing there. And I look up, and I snap on it, and Tommy was there. And he had been doing laps. We'd both been just avoiding going to the front because we didn't want to be the first one there, which I get, but also it was me and Tommy. I was like, it had to be us.

I was going to say, there's two guys I would pick. I was hiding in tree shade. Tommy was just doing laps. He was like, I hope someone else gets here. I hope someone else gets here. I hope someone else gets here. Bro, the dumbest thing in society is the, like, we won't see you until your whole party's there.

I didn't even ask, though. I know, I know. But I'm like, you couldn't have done anything anyway. Yeah, right. You weren't going to give that table away but then when we where we were sitting we was like this the restaurant had like an outdoor patio type section and we were sitting indoors but like right by the door to the patio and someone had brought their dog to the restaurant and he was just like the person sitting at the bar and the guys had him on the leash and And he was just, like, the person was sitting at the bar, and the guy just had him on the leash. And the dog was just sitting in front of the door.

Like, on the mat. Like, it couldn't have been more in front of the door. As every waiter, busboy, person going outside had to step over the dog. No one moved the dog. Get the fuck out of here. And at one point, it was at the end of lunch, but I was like, to get him to go to the bathroom i'm gonna lose my fucking mind and like i think someone's got to say say something that dogs have too many rights yeah that dogs do not belongs where they are most of the time speak on it it was preach like no one even like some one of the

waiters should have been like can you get the fucking dog out of here? But instead they're petting it. That dog shouldn't have been there. Speak on it, brother John. Even the people it was affecting somehow weren't affected. But I was like, I'm going nuts. This dog is not only like it's a safety hazard. If that person doesn't get their back leg up, they're going to fall down the stairs. It's crazy i don't know when we lost the thread on you can just leave dogs alone at home for a little while

just put them on the other side it doesn't yeah but but don't bring them at all but if you don't bring them at all but if you're gonna bring put them on the other side it was probably it was crazy so you can leave your dog alone for like a week, let alone a fucking afternoon, okay? Get the fuck out of here with this shit. Dogs goddamn everywhere. I was saying that like – Yo, this is it, by the way. Like we've – for years we've tiptoed around like anti-dog sentiments, and I realized like –

I'm not anti-dog. No. I like dogs as dogs. Yes, yes. Right, right, right, right That's what I mean, people construe it in this weird way It's almost like the red zone take There's some validity to this

You just hate football No, I like football, that's why I want to watch football And not a bunch of graphics and fucking highlights And I like dogs And I want to sit on my couch at home with them Or your couch at home with them I don't want to have them in the middle of my fucking restaurant while we got to walk to and from the bar.

Bro, the dog battle for civil rights was more seamless than any other group of people. They faced no pushback. There was none. People were like, black people shouldn't get to go to school. And everyone's like, no, dogs can hang out in restaurants, supermarkets.

No problem. Food, travel, circulating air. We'll just let these animals in. Yeah, no, dogs can hang out in restaurants, supermarkets. No problem. Food, travel, circulating air. We'll just let these animals in. Yeah, no problem. Dude. No problem. I think the – I think being – having reasonable anti-dog opinions is when you become an adult. Yeah.

Like, you know, there's just different rules for everybody. Like, it's not an age thing. It's not a – I think all these people who are adults, everyone in this restaurant is an adult yeah like like like you know there's just different rules for everybody like it's not an age thing it's not a i think all these people were adults everyone in this restaurant was an adult no no no they weren't no no no they weren't dude they weren't because that's that's what i'm saying is like you can't say that like when you turn 18 you're an adult because it's a lot of 18 year olds are still kids you can't say uh even when you when like if you have a family because like there are some people who don't have families like everybody lives like different lives or whatever when you've been on the planet long enough to be uh to to be uh unafraid to just say like we're getting a little crazy with the animals we bring around those are adults and

everybody else the people who say that like that dogs are being are the same as as babies they're not adults so it's like all the people who love dogs more than anything you're not being an adult if you think about you're being like you're like a little like oh my god it's a puppy ah that's like what kids do the adults are the ones going i mean i like the dog but i just don't want it next to me on a plane yeah i don't want it sitting on my lap at a restaurant or i don't want it fucking running around in the movie theater. That's when you become an adult, when you can just admit those things. I think I said this before, but literally, my grandparents had a doghouse.

It took two generations for dogs to go from the doghouse to the penthouse. They're everywhere. They're in the boardroom. They're in the boardroom. Bezos is sitting there with his dog. Why is the dog here? I thought this was a people meeting. What the fuck is the dog doing here?

And guess what? The people who bring their dogs out the most almost always got a dog for, like, not the right reasons. So the dog's not trained yeah so like yeah but like even like like the people who were like with this guy i'm like dude aren't and again like this is just the feelings i feel but like when i'm with yeah you're even throwing out a little you're qualifying when i'm with just say it just say it no no i don't because it's not that bad but it's like i'm so uncomfortable even when i'm in the group with the dog I'm like dude let's just move the fucking dog

over there dude the fucking dog's barking like why we're ruining everyone else's time at this restaurant well that's also my thing I really respect anybody

who rescues dogs but also like I'm not down to just fucking do the wild card but if you're gonna get a dog you have to get a dog like you have to train you have to get a dog like right you have to train you have to do it right like you don't have this fucking thing that like you

kind of just lift your chair up and you put the leash under and then you just sit there and let the dog do what it wants like right people are out for like a nice relaxing saturday afternoon right the dog's barking and sniffing like i don't know get it away i'm that's why i'm just chilling like i have my key lime pie delicious by the. The people who rescue a dog and take it very seriously and all that, like, great. Obviously the best thing you can do. When people were telling me to get a rescue, I was like, I am not in a position to, like, train this dog every day and make sure it's going to be all good. I don't want to do that. I don't know how to do that.

I don't think I can do that. So I'm not going to just, like, pick one from the fucking, you fucking you know like you can get somebody from a shelter that's gonna be a fucking problem everyone else has already thought it right right right it's like i just not a home that's a real roll of the dice that i am just not uh equipped to to make that gamble right now so the rest of you god bless you i'm not taking that one home. It's the lack of – Oh, I'm a shopper. If it ever comes to it. Yeah.

We don't adopt a shopper. Come on. Are you paying too much for your wireless plan? That's a rhetorical question because the answer is yes. Unless, of course, you work with Straight Talk. Straight Talk Wireless. They have $25 a month. So those are the only people who can say that they're not paying too much for your wireless plan.

Everybody else in the world, if you're using anything other than that, you are paying too much for your wireless, including all the morons who are using the top dogs. You're paying $200 a month for what? It's the same exact thing on your phone that you can get for $25 per line when you get up to four lines over at Straight Talk. You get data unlimited, talk unlimited, text unlimited on nationwide

5G. There's just no reason to pay more. It's like if you told me that the expensive one was 5G and the cheap one was 3G, I would get it. There's just no reason. The cheap ones give you the same thing that the expensive one was 5G and the cheap one was 3G, I would get it. There's just no reason. The cheap ones give you the same thing that the expensive ones do. There's no fucking reason for it to exist.

Plus, they have no contracts, no hidden fees, and no compromises. That's the Straight Talk Talking from Straight Talk Wireless, available at Walmart and Walmart.com. All right, let's get into it. Oh, wait, no, sorry. Oh, wait, by the way. Oh, yeah, so we're going to get to my sorry. Oh, wait. By the way. Oh, yeah. So we're going to get to my dream. So my dream – it's not really a dream, but I do – oh, wait.

I do have a dream too. I was in my sleep and I thought – that was all because Trent thought this was funny. That's why that lunch came up. Okay. That was 20 minutes because I said the line and Trent thought this was funny, so I'm going to say it. Trent likes it. I thought I was just giggling in my sleep about these words. And the word – it's not funny.

Now that I'm about to say it, I'm like – It's not funny. I do this a lot with dreams and stuff. I'll wake up and write down a dream, figure it's cool or interesting. I read it in the morning. I'm like, this is... It's not funny. I do this a lot with dreams and stuff. I'll wake up and write down a dream, thinking it's cool or interesting. I read it in the morning. I'm like, that sucked. The words that start with uh are really funny.

It's not funny. That's not funny at all. You're like, if you can just say amendment. No surprise there that our resident idiots... Where are you from? idiots are laughing at this. America? What do you want to make? Come down and think of a less funny podcast segment than this.

This is our new segment, by the way. This is called our segment. If you want to sponsor us saying words with oh, it's so funny. By the way, the other one real quick I gotta shout out you I had a different dream

Where I had Actually bro this makes sense Why I should have brought this up earlier Because I definitely had this dream in response to You not having my back When you became a rapist When I raped people I had I had a dream where

i was uh it was like an ex-girlfriend had put us on a text chain and she it was like it was a bunch your ex or my ex my ex and uh it was a bunch of like it was me you and a bunch of like – it was me, you, and a bunch of like foreign hockey players. For some reason, she had all their pictures and they all had like the Swedish jerseys that are just covered in logos. Okay. And it was like John made all that up. Here's everyone who can confirm. If this is Kevin, please hear them out. And you replied, this is Kevin.

Yes, this is Kevin. No, I don't want to hear anything anyone has to say. And I was like, that's my guy! That's my guy! That's what's up. I did it, by the way. I don't remember the start of the dream, but I remember waking up feeling guilty.

And I was like, he's got my back, dude! Bro, I will lie to any girl's face for you, bro. Until you rape somebody. It wasn't a rape. Okay. It wasn't a rape. As long as you didn't rape somebody, I will have your back. I think I made up a player.

I'll even have your back on murder, by the way. Nice. Just not rape. Rape's too much. But if you murder someone and you want to be like, yo, just tell people I didn't do it, I'll do that for you. Because that person's dead already. It was like I invented a player on like yo just tell people I didn't do it I'll do that because that person's dead

already it was like I like invented like a player on a team and like made I don't know what it was whatever it was he didn't do it didn't do it and by the way if you don't have

multiple people in your life who Kevin thinks you're telling that story about because whoever it is it's not whoever you're thinking of it's someone else.

That's great. That's great. Congratulations. Things are going great for you then. One more. What time is it? 11.30. 11.30.

Okay, we got time. We'll do one more 10-minute segment. I haven't opened this link yet. I just saw a link and thought it was funny. Okay. And I thought it could be a segment. So the Reddit headline was, What's the dumbest thing people called you gay for? So I thought we could just go through some stuff and decide if it's gay or not.

Totally. Totally. Okay. I was called gay for showering daily. That's all right. No, come on. That's fine. Thatering daily. That's all right. No, come on. That's fine. That's stupid.

That's a reach. I can't. I mean, I don't know how to read. You don't know how to read. I've been called gay so much, but. Is there a way to, like, sort Reddit so it just starts, like, I just want the headline. Yeah. I just want each.

If you go to Sort comments I was told it was gay To wash my ass Kind of gay Well I mean we talked Was it Frankie Somebody recently was like I put a finger up my ass

When I Big Jay Oakerson Yeah but somebody here Did it too I think Really Frankie If anybody I think

It might have been When we were on Oh it was Frankie Yes yes yes Frankie like fucks himself In the shower Yeah yeah yeah Um By the way Shout out the PGA It might have been when we were on the road. Oh, it was Frankie. Yes, yes, yes. Frankie, like, fucks himself in the shower. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

By the way, shout out to PGA selling Borelli shirts. Yeah, that's fucking dope. So cool. This is a long roundabout way of saying he got called gay for putting on lotion. That's a good one. That is a good one that I do. Most of these are going to be good ones that I do. Wearing a red pair of Vans. That feels a good one. That is a good one that I do. Most of these are going to be good ones that I do. Wearing a red pair of Vans.

That feels a little gay. Red sneakers are like flamboyant. You're definitely like, look at me, and look at me is definitely gay. I like to give oral sex to women. Ultimately, the gayest thing you can do. All right, Uncle June. I was called gay for six months in middle school for doing hopscotch. Hopscotch. So gay.

Hopscotch and jumping rope. Come on. You are a flaming homosexual. As I said, most of these are going to be things I do. The second one really wrote me in. But it's not fun. I don't play patty cake. You're doing – look, I've done hopscotch too.

Hopscotch and patty cake. Those are so gay. I don't think I've ever done patty cake you're doing i i no look i've done hopscotch too but hopscotch and patty cake with those are so gay i don't think i've ever done patty i'm sure i've done it with my cousins or something like that um if you were if you're a guy and you do patty cake over the age of like three like i could i could see keegan be like this shit's gay yeah i'm not playing patty cake dad that's for gays i saw someone have a tweet. Oh, it was after Ted Cruz did his, like, we still drink beer video. You see that one? Who did it? I forget.

Like, the things people – I get it. Everyone's trying to score political points and stuff. But it was like, I don't know, like, some study came out that was like, you should only drink two beers a week. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, Ted Cruz, you saw him? Yeah. Were they all sipped afterwards?

Yeah, it was so weird. Oh, that was gay. That was so gay. It was gay. Yo, no, but for real uh organizing a little skit like and then i'm gonna say this and then we all sit at the same time so fucking gay that is the gayest shit ever but someone quoted that and yeah that's right they should have said this but it was the uh they uh they were like it's crazy that our country is run by people who are still living their deathly fear of being called gay in middle school.

By the way, that study – All they are run by is being afraid of being called gay in middle school. That study said two drinks a day. Oh, really? Which is like I think kind of good. But also like I don't know Yeah a study said it What does it mean Right right

No one's trying to enact it Into law Right I was gonna say Like we They also say you should Eat a bunch of vegetables Right we don't do that either But honestly

Like two drinks If you think about The population Of people Like you can have two drinks We can have two drinks It's no problem For most people

You have two drinks You're probably like On a buzz And you should Not get drunk every night Dude most Like I saw I saw a thing That can't be right good but it was something about the rise of non-alcoholics and beers and um not the humans yeah and it was like no one ever addressed the fact that 30 of the country doesn't drink And then Like they choose not to?

Yeah And then of the 70% that do I think something like 60% of those Consider themselves basically non-drinkers So we're talking about Who's doing all the drinking? Well that's the thing Those people are doing a lot

They do a lot of heavy lifting All of the booze is being bought by them. I was like, where does everyone I've ever met fall into? Well, because it's like a legal drug. So it's just like, yeah, they just – there's like 10% of the population buys all of it. So it's a legalized and pretty much affordable drug. I was telling that to my friend. We're out to dinner on Labor Day, and I was telling that study to my family and some friends, stuff like that.

And I was like, we're like everyone I've ever known. Yeah. We just drink a lot. And my mom was like, well, where do you hang out the most? Bars. Where people drink? It's mostly bars. But the last thing, because I know we have to tighten that up the uh

which was that was that was the one-time segments was a pretty big flop today no and you know you know what i want to say though by the way that's a hard segment for us because we get called gay a lot like for everything so it's like i don't know yeah i mean like like the the new the the uh the resurgence of the pause game is like i can't even play it because I say actually gay things. It's like I do a podcast where I talk about getting a finger up my ass. Can you even say pause when it is gay? We talk about sucking a guy's dick. You can't say pause when it's just like we're being gay.

So it's hard for me to even enjoy the game. Pause. I'm in the middle of the sentence. Yeah. Let me finish. It's going to get worse, dude. But the, so all that needs to

be tightened up a little bit, which maybe you remember the article I read this weekend about the producers, about podcast producers. Oh, I didn't see this. And it was about

the rise of the third mic and how the old radio tradition of the third mic is alive and well and in in podcasting what did you think i was saying wait was this in the group chat i knew exactly no i tweeted oh okay no i knew exactly what you're saying i think that that was what i thought you were saying okay but then i said i think you misunderstood what i was saying but then i was like i can't i'm not gonna then i was like overthinking the response back and then i

was like it's too late and i just didn't respond back but but I was like, I can't, I'm not going to, then I was like overthinking the response back. And then I was like, it's too late. And then I just didn't respond back. But, but I was just saying like, I think I don't talk into a mic. I just forget. Like, I'll just like be talking to you guys and I'll be like, oh wait, we're on a podcast. I see. I see. I see.

I wasn't even saying talking to mics. I was just saying talk more. Um, but the, the... It's just about what producers have to do. It's probably Saturday morning if you're scrolling. The... You guys do a lot.

I didn't get a chance to read the article. Honestly, it's a good article. That article probably says they do a lot. Shut the fuck up. I'm sure NPR producers do a lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's actually fair. Like, Jackie's job is to, like, go through and bleep out when we say, f***. That's how hard her job is. That's definitely true. But the, uh, the, um, what was I going to say? Oh, like, it was talking about – because it was also referencing sound engineers. And I was like, I think Jackie's both.

Yeah, yeah. This is the thing. We definitely don't have sound engineers. This is kind of the thing that we just went through with Barstool where it's like everything got specialized. Yeah, yeah. It's like we need one person to do all that. I will edit the audio. Like, if the audio doesn't sound right, I edit that.

I don't know. Do you think about that, how the audio sounds? Yes. If one of you guys is lower, then I have to the audio. Like, if the audio doesn't sound right, I edit that. I don't know. Do you think about that, how the audio sounds? Yes. If one of you guys is lower, then I have to go in. I have to get the stems. I have to, like, erase. I mean, it's not, like, a complete technical, like, thing. But you know what?

One day I'm going to go through my whole process. And I'm going to show you guys. I'm going to just do, like, a little, like, sped up video. I'm going to show you. Because with the real, like, the editing is not the annoying part. The part is once it's all done and having to put it together put the ads in put the cold open the intro then

get the like all the different parts upload get the type like all the end there it's like I'll be done at a certain time and I'll be like I have so much more to do what what what the the rise of the video podcasts is what fucked them

Audio podcasts kick rocks It was interesting I used to do that shit Chop chop bop bop If you have a heavily edited show It's a different story Take that dead air out of the beginning And I forgot to press stop

There's a lot of dead air at the end But the video where it's like Now we gotta put in the picture they're talking about and the video they're referencing and all that that's you're making a whole fucking a whole you know movie right the uh it was an interesting read like it was like it starts talking about like i forget what podcast but some podcast and like their producer wasn't there at a live show that the writer of this article was at and like the crowd started booing and i was like that happened to us yeah absolutely like jackie's not here what the fuck are we here for the producer is also just the like it's like the um the buddy like sidekick in a movie you always

like that guy you know what i mean it's like yeah all right like channing tatum's the star but jonah hill is like this or whatever That's not a good example. But like you always like the funny dude who's just there to be there and not. Yeah, Creed Bratton. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. It's like, yeah, we all know that like Steve Carell is the star, but who do you really like from The Office? It does that.

That's the producer. They probably interviewed like four separate podcasts. Like one of them was on a network I've heard of. I never really heard of any of them. But they were talking to the producers of it, and one was like, it's kind of great, because I don't have to talk that much,

so when I have something great, I just get to speak. Yeah, so it's just like, you're hitting dingers. Every time I hit, it's all gone. Honestly, I'm going to read this article, and I think we should make one for Barstool. If it's different enough.

Because I bet your job is different from other podcasters. There were references to booking guests, which you don't do, but you do do the – In between. You have the in between there. So I guess you're kind of booking them for us. Yeah, you guys deserve some show. Someone else books them for Barstool, and then you book them for us kind of. But the – it was good. I was reading it and being like, oh, I didn't even think about that kind of stuff.

Oh, I didn't think about that kind of stuff. Yeah. What I think it is is I don't think what people think they do is the important part. I think what they don't get credit for is actually a hard shit. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. It all comes full circle. All right. Let's bang. Like being a parent. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. It all comes full circle.

All right. Let's bang out some voicemails. Okay. Wait. I have to get my laptop. Oh, the producer's not even ready. Unbelievable. I forgot to bump

at the camera. Oh, wait. Oh, this actually doesn't matter. The producer's talking about when they'll cut themselves out a lot. Yeah. Today's voicemails are brought to you by

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What's up, KFC Fights whole crew? I got a story here that kind of hurts to tell. So my grandfather's first wife, she used to clean and do housework for this elderly lady who turned out to be a fairly famous Canadian painter by the name of Emily Carr. And I guess she was hard up for money, so Emily Carr offered to pay her with like seven or eight of her paintings. But she didn't really like the paintings, so she turned it down and just got paid later.

But I searched it up. Emily Carr original paintings can go from anywhere to a hundred thousand to five million at auction originals from her so that's my so i guess my question is now what is probably the biggest missed opportunity by you guys that you can think of have Have a good one. Bro, that one hurts. That's my dream, by the way. More so than earning a bunch of money is being like, my grandparent died

and I found a Babe Ruth original card. Yeah, yeah. But not inheritance. I found something stupid in their house and it's worth $40 million. That's the dream right there.

That's better than the lottery. That's better than earning it. Just like, oh, grandma has this bowl from the the ming dynasty that like you know some fucking collector is gonna indiana jones gonna pay a billion dollars for it um worst missed opportunity you know you know what i actually thought this weekend? And it's not actually – it wouldn't actually come out this way. But with all the Dion hype, he wanted me to do that podcast with him. And I was like, oh, I should have done it.

But no, no, no. He would have gone on to coach and the podcast would have ended. But when he was like, I want KFC to do that. I was like, holy shit. Dion wants to do something with me. But I was, you know, there was a whole bunch of business stuff and it didn't work out. And I remember being like, did you just like turn down doing something with prime time? Like that's kind of crazy.

But, and then when all this was happening, I was like, oh fuck, I missed the boat on that one. Uh, but it, it, it, no, it. I missed the boat on that one. But it – no, it would have never worked out that way. I think I would have turned that down too. But the – and I think that's right. Yeah. I mean – I think like – The way it was going down wouldn't – it wouldn't – put it this way.

Prime was – he's always been cool to me and great. But like once that ended I like I've never heard from him Yeah never again Yeah You know what I mean It was just like

I like this guy He can host We can do this And then when I said no He was like cool peace Goodbye It wasn't like something Where it was like really

All about me But Well if you're I think Like we're at the stage And a lot of people Are at the stage Where it's just like

The If I don't want to do If I'm not going to do a good Right I think like we're at the stage and a lot of people are at the stage where it's just like the if I don't want to do it if I'm not going to do it good it's like getting a dog if I'm not going to do it right don't do it what's the point of doing it yes yes

right and right can mean a lot of things I have other things I have to do it's gotta be I can't give it my all like it is there's that stage where you're like

kind of swimming you're like I gotta latch on to something and you're like kind of swimming like i gotta i gotta latch on to something and you know now i have what i what i do successful yep so like now i only want to do things that i like truly like and it's not not that there's like incredible wealth or like it's just like this is what i do and i can my time yeah and like i can this is all i can do right i was just like well would you take this other – I think one of the things – one of the values is like, am I going to get more money for it? Right.

Is there going to be any compensation at all? Then I have to give myself to the thing that gets me money. It doesn't make a ton of sense for me. I just don't have the time on my plate right now to do that. As for the question, I got a couple things probably. Yours are like you did the thing. You just didn't get the reward, unfortunately. But you didn't miss the opportunity.

It's not like somebody said, yo, you should do a Saturdays are for the boys, and you were like, no. You did it and just business. But of the same vein, I was thinking of, not the same thing as that but same at the end of the question i saw a clip the other day of magic johnson talking on uh up and smoke about how he got offered from nike stock instead it was almost like air he got the same

three did this converse nike offered him money or you know pitched him for his sneaker He went with Converse I believe Because they offered him the most money He couldn't come up with anything so Blah blah blah blah blah And they were like what's that stock worth now And he's like 5.2 And the stock he got

No the stock he turned down But I didn't Agree with that one that's not a it would have been. But I, I, I didn't agree with that one. That's not a fair one. What, what do you mean? That because the, like he made the right decision in that moment. Not that he made the right decision, but just like, that's one that you have to attribute so much of that success to Michael Jordan. Right.

And if they took, if you took that, then they don't make that bet. Magic would have done great. Magic would have done great. But it's, and it's still probably worth billions. Right. And if you took that, then they don't make that bet. Magic would have done great. Magic would have done great. But it's – and it's still probably worth billions. Totally. But, like, it's not 5.2. Yeah, yeah. Air Jordan – if he takes that, Air Jordan doesn't happen.

So that's an easy one to be, like, the things that happened the way they were supposed to. The thought is, like, if I had all of Nike – because what people didn't take into account in Nike is that they had Tinker Hatfield. They had great designers. They had great minds there. And if you applied that to Magic Johnson, it would have been like the Air Jordan of Magic. Oh, yeah? Kevin, did Michael Jordan get AIDS? Stockpile wouldn't have done great after that.

I stand corrected. I mean, like, let's be honest. If a guy with AIDS is pitching a sneaker, I'm probably not going to buy it. Like, I'm talking when AIDS was AIDS, too. AIDS is AIDS, that guy. Nike stock probably wouldn't have done too hot in 80 fucking was it late 80s well but he didn't get it till 92 what aids he didn't get aids okay so 92 whatever year it was that's why i was trying to think like okay so 92 but i'm thinking a bit of a plummet in nike stock

bro like people send tweets now and like, like, stock loses $200 million. You got AIDS. What if they got AIDS? You know what was funny? At that point, I was, like, a young kid, and I didn't quite, like, get that, like, you get AIDS from fucking, you know? So I was just kind of like, oh, it's so sad. And it's still sad, but it's like when you find out, it's just like, oh, Patrick Johnson fucked thousands of people. So, yeah, he was going to get hate.

Oh, okay. If the brand of your sneakers has to give a press conference where it's like, I didn't get it the gay way, I didn't get it the drugs way, I got it the cool way. Like, I can't imagine the sneakers going to do too hot. That's so funny. I'm like the 1%, bro. I'm the 1%. I swear to fucking God. Don't listen to your dad.

You've been on the Crocs 5? Yeah, I wasn't supposed to be, but I just wrapped my shoes on. I have pair of shoes on. One is Andy Cohen's. Show later and ask me when I need to wear nice dress shoes. I didn't have time. Oh, so what? You're not going to dress up for us?

Fuck, man. Honestly, the socks have been really high. Just realize these pants are not that cool. I didn't really get any PR clothes this week, so I just dressed myself with the clothes I had left over from the last two weeks. So when you say PR clothes, what do you mean? They'll just send you a bunch of shit? Yeah, then you don't have to buy clothes.

If you go to events, no, they just send you stuff. They send you a bunch, and then you just wear what you like and then send it back. All right, so I'm glad you brought that up because I was just talking to someone about this. I was actually talking to Lawrence, who you've done their podcast, Failing Upwards. Yeah, yeah. And he gets a ton of shit. Do you feel bad? Do you feel obligated with all the free shit you get to post it and be like, thank you?

Not at all. Dude, I feel so bad. Only the brands I want to... You're a pussy. But only the brands I want to have a relationship with that are cool. Yeah. But I mean, know uh you're still president like when he was opening all those fucking packages yes yeah unboxing yeah how much

stuff did it was going crazy for a while that's true that's like that's annoying at that point yeah think of it too like imagine the tables were tart like if you i don't know sent uh this one works yeah this one good if you sent like our podcast to Joe Rogan and just like yo man

like you mind posting that I sent it to you for free you know what I mean it's like that's fair play yeah yeah

that's a good point I keep beat your billboard you know but if it's a cool brand you know and if it's my friend's brand like last night

a girl I really like her name's Dodge she's like a fashion designer so I wore like her outfit to the US Open because they last night a girl I really like her name's Dodge she's like a fashion designer so I wore like her outfit to the US Open because they make her show and I really like what she made she did like a collab

with Wrangler so like I wore that and I'll tag her because she's like the homie you know yeah that's cool I think the amount of power

or influence whatever you want to call it that you have when you reach that point I think it's cool to kind of give back and do it that way I'm not like a model

but most women like girls you know when you go to say like Cannes Film Festival or something they're just flown there to walk the red carpet

with us their whole job is like they get paid to wear one dress and tag them and leave they don't even go to the premiere

they just kind of go to a party and get paid 20k to wear one dress for one photo and leave so that's kind of like a whole industry

I barely I get like some crocs and stuff I mean I don't get that much fancy stuff but if I get it and I like it I'll wear it and I'll wear it yeah but you know because you you you have that that vibe about you like i feel like people would be like oh if a dude like diplo wears that like it's it's cool

then yeah there's not that many guys that feel like like yeah relatable yeah like regular people there's guys that look like crazy like you know yes i can't wear what lona sex wears out in the streets but he's like of course fashion brands love him but i'm like kind of like the normal guy i kind of i'm a little edgy like you see my nipple maybe today i'll do a little nipple every once in a while but you know i try to just like be pretty low-key and stuff yeah i mean i mean i would put you you had the cowboy guy by the way right i still think the cowboy phase is like the the always the end the end game yeah that's the final boss because no matter how old you get there's like three looks you can really turn into you can just kind of be

like those four you can be like just dad like the new balances and like kind of just wear like i don't know dockers or whatever uh you can be like a meth dealing but like biker kind of guy that's like the face hats like your like life is like jail and bars and like biker kind of guy that's like you got your face tats like your life is like jail and bars and stuff you can be old and that's cool as fuck

you can still look like that like Post Malone is on that like wave but he also does the cowboy thing

and that's like really cool you just like wear like the classic stuff like Carhartt the cowboy hat you look like

all these country guys that are like hot right now all just wear I was gonna say you're on the country wave yeah like that's just like it's kind of like the final established

way a man can look when they get older. What's the fourth one? Oh, just like a suit and tie. Like a really fancy guy. Like a most interesting man. Corporate type shit. Corporate kind of vibe. Dude, I like the corporate vibe.

Corporate vibe is good, but it's very expensive. Like to actually flex on new suits all the time. Bro, when someone's pulling a suit off, dude. I don't know what it is, but you could be wearing a fucking $20,000 suit or $100 from a men's warehouse, but you look better in a suit. Yeah, 100%. Almost exclusively. And obviously, the nicer ones look nicer. But every dude, if you just put on a suit and tie, it's like, oh, that looks sharp for someone.

It's like a real glow. I don't know. But men's fashion hasn't really changed in like 200 years like women's they do everything everything's so crazy men we always wear like suit and tie

like that's like if you go to like Armani or a fashion show it's they don't really change much the lapel changes a little bit but it's been like 100 years

like last time it was weird it was like George Washington was wearing like coattails these kind of things have you ever seen

pictures of like old time baseball stadiums? The fans. All men in fucking hats. Imagine going to the ballgame. As they're screaming the N-word at the players. Yeah, they're just like,

Jackie Robinson, get him out of here! He looks sharp, though. But people used to go out I mean people used to go to airports with suits like bro what I'm in now yo who was I with oh it's with Jackie and Jackie our producer we had to go we went down to Louisiana and we were talking about like she's talking about how like you're on TikTok and you're like god everyone's fucking hot but then if you just hang out in a place where there's a lot of people you're like oh everyone's fucking hot. But then if you just hang out in a place where there's a lot of people, you're like, oh, everyone's disgusting looking. Everyone's hot on the internet.

My most popular TikTok series for a while is called Airport Creatures. I just sneak videos and make a story about who they are. That's amazing. This guy invested in Dogecoin,

whatever it is. Something like, this is a hedge fund, this is a rich, whatever it is. I just kind of make fun of people. That's fucking great. I like that.

Sometimes people see me and they're like, tag me, make a video of me or something but people start coming up to you barefoot like disgusting right you like make up something like oh this guy just left burning man or like whatever it is you just like make up a story about who this person was and i was speaking of you had a ride literally and figuratively at burning man huh we did yeah it was probably like you know you do even when you make music you just always make a bunch of tracks when you just do some newsworthy stuff

so it might be like I could like rescue some orphans or something or like whatever it is but just like Leaving Burning Man was like my biggest

news story in the last 10 years so dude moments like that make me be like why do I even fucking try it's like

you get one tenth the traction you get when you pour your heart and soul into something. I know. I do so much, like, try to make some emotional posts. Nobody cares. Whatever it is,

and, like, I don't know, go to some crazy place and visit, and then just, like, I'll leave Burning Man. It's, like, it's the best of the experience. Well, you escaped Ebola. Yeah, I did.

So, apparently, I got it, too, and I was ground zero, one of the memes, and I left, and, like, the government was looking for me. No fucking way. It was, like, one post. People sent me, like, it was confirmed. Diplo was at ground zero, and he escaped the gate or whatever, and I left and the government was looking for me. It was confirmed.

Diplo was at Ground Zero and he escaped the gate or whatever. When you're in something like that, I've obviously never been in a situation where the whole world thinks I'm part of some conspiracy. Are you annoyed or are you like, this is hilarious? I thought it was so funny because it was happening in real time.

We were still trying to get out while the story was happening and stuff. The craziest part is it wasn't just me and Chris Rock. It was like Sidney Crawford was with us, Randy Gerber, Austin Butler, the guy who produced White Lotus. No way. It was so many other – like people like the celebrities that were just trying to get out to see their kids and stuff. They were all like hiking. We all walked.

We all decided together. Oh, no shit. Their camp was like, they had a really big kind of like, kind of celeb-y camp next to me and we just, we all like bossed up.

Honestly, Karlie Kloss is the one who's like, we're going. She was like, let's, she was like military, like we're waking up at 7,

we're going to hike and then she's like, we'll wake up at 10, we'll do it later. But she was like, the one that motivated everybody. If it's not,

I don't know, like Wes Anderson or somebody needs to make a movie of this. Like 10 celebrities trying to get out of Burning Man and they have their own existential journey on the way. That's wild though. That's a lot

of names, man. It's going to be definitely a big bit in the Chris Rock event. He did not want to be there, it felt like. We had dinner the night before and he was like because he did not want to be there, it felt like, and we had dinner the night before and he was like... He does not seem

to me like a Burning Man kind of guy. I would not have... Like, one of the biggest Burning Man guys is like Puff Daddy. Really? He's like 14 years going.

He's all on his love wave, though. He's very... He's always loved like the higher vibration. He's like really one of the biggest... Him and Paris Hilton

are the two like biggest Burners I know. No shit. You would never know that. Like, they love it. They go there every year and they rip. They're like...

What goes... I just learned... I always thought it was a music festival what what goes on at bernie man like the music is very secondary like um i play i dj probably like six seven times like just different art cars and it's hard to explain it's like but wait is there like a stage and speakers like set up like you would be on tour or it's like small there's like six or seven camps that make little stages but it's really like they're you build a camp like you get a little plot of land like it's this one semi-circle that's like we have the the roads are like clock numbers so like six seven eight nine ten and the streets are efg so you get like a little whatever size you need you kind of rent that and you make a camp and the ones that are on the outside this sides have like the sound

camp so the music goes there and then on the outside of that is like called the playa and that's just like anything goes people just driving around these art cars playing music and it's like it's like the best way to explain it is like you go to circuit city and turn off you turn everything on at once you walk around the street you walk around the store right that's kind of what it feels like you're like it's dark and there's lights everywhere and there's dusk and there's just you know no light pollution you just feel like you're in the middle of this like dry lake bed bed but you have a little camp and you organize it very few of them

are sound camps but that's the ones you hear about because that's like the parties some people just do like Dr. Bronner you know the soap company

he has a camp and you just go there and do like a shower like it's a big tub everybody just goes there and gets naked and washes themselves and it's a big line

to get into that everyone wants to get naked with Dr. Bronner there's like full yoga camps there's like there's like TED talks people are just like doing speeches

there's like so much and you buy tickets to this you have to buy a ticket there's like 80,000 tickets they give up and then you buy the tickets not expensive like 500 bucks

but sometimes it runs out this year it didn't run out and then you have to resell them but then you buy the tickets and you enter your camp because the camp kind of provides everything for you you have to have food

and that's random you have to have food. That's random? Some people go and just bring a tent and it's kind of a rough life. Those are the ones who really suffered, I guess. This rainstorm. But you have a camp and they have everything. They have the toilets. You organize it together with a crew of like-minded people. Then you just make everything yourself.

You make a little village, a little camp for the week. How in the mix are you with these little camps? I just have a lot of friends. This year here i just did like i just kind of hooked up with some friends that were there and i was like hey i'm only coming for three days because i get a shift pod and stayed with them and they had great food and i had like my my e-bike someone brought it there from my house in malibu and i just had that and my backpack so it's pretty cruising around what kind of like what kind of drugs are we doing um Well, there's a lot of drugs. I think MDMA, LSD. It's very psychedelic.

It's a big psychedelic one. You actually can't smoke weed there. Really? I mean, some of those drugs aren't really controlled. It's Nevada. It's like BLM, Bureau of Land Management.

And so marijuana is like federally illegal. No shit. So that's the one thing people get caught all the time is if a cop, there's a lot of cops everywhere. It's not like that free.

Lawlessness. Because it's really safe. I mean. There's a lot of cops everywhere. It's not like that free. Lawlessness. Because it's really safe. I mean, it's a huge festival. People do pass away. Some people maybe want to go there and die, like old people. Some people, first year I went, someone ran into the fire. The burning man was burning. Oh, shit.

And just like, I don't want to. And died? Yeah, died. Did it affect the vibe? Nah, man. Bro, my man. For him, yeah. I think it was like...

That vibe was just kind of suck. Everyone's like, that dude fucking rocks, man. Honestly, he probably do. I mean, that is a pretty metal move, like... Probably do, but... My man said, it's really, really safe. And then followed it up with, some man just ran into the fire and...

Well, every... I've been to a lot of parties with fires that I considered safe. No one jumped in it. That's his fault, yeah. You're right. The guy was on a quest. Like, that was his, like,

he wanted to do that. I mean, that's, like, what he did, but, I mean, any big festival, you're going to have some, like, injuries, some fatalities.

It's like, it sucks, but, like, it's, like, a huge festival. I think EDC, whatever. You get that many people together. Yeah, there's going to be something, so hopefully people get safe

and someone could fall off, you know, even stage diving. Yeah, yeah. You could fall off and hit your head and have a concussion or have, you know, even stage diving. Yeah, yeah. You could fall off and hit your head and have a concussion or have, you know, anything happen.

But people at Burning Man really help each other. Like, that's kind of what happened to me when I left. I had no problem. People, a guy saw me, gave me a ride.

It's like, it's probably the most friendliest group of people in a community of people. Did they know who you were when they picked you up? The guy that picked me up dead, yeah. That's like the one place

where I'm like more famous than like some of the actors. Yeah. I could see you being very popular. But like, they picked me up dead yeah that's like the one place where i'm like more famous than like some of the actors yeah i could see you being very popular that but like they they picked you up strangers and were like oh shit that's diplo or they picked up diplo they they're like i was like oh he was i was walking and he had stopped because his car was hot he's like oh is that diplo and i was like yeah and he's like he's like i was like can i get a ride with you he's like i'm about to go back and get my friend i'm like uh all right whatever and he went back and he's like you know

fuck i'm gonna go pick up diplo and he came back and he drove me and then we were like chris rock's agent was there he's like well can you tell can you bring chris rock too he'll tell you some jokes in the back of the truck so he got him on the back too and then like my crew was there because we were flying to dc and we just we just kind of like you know rode for like 30 minutes with him you're so right i can just see chris rock now being like i was in the back of the pickup truck like just doing that cadence we had like a really

I'll be honest we had like a really fancy camp and like the night it was like this torrential rainstorm like everybody's like does the apocalypse

is coming we're like in this kind of like really fancy you're like we're good we're like Chris Rock but so wait

is it like it's like makeshift like home like it's full shelter or are we talking like this camp I was in was like really like fancy like it was like shelter are we talking like this this camp i was in was like really like fancy like like it was like we're like a nobody was like made so made the room

ran out of wood had like wow air conditioning and a chef and stuff so hey chris robert is like if the people outside they knew what we were doing it'd be like a run on us right now right right i was gonna say did it was there ever a little bit of like, you know, some fucking Walking Dead type shit where people realize? We did try to venture out like in the middle of the night and like just going like 40 feet took like 45 minutes. Because it was like you're walking when it was really raining. You're walking like your foot sunk down like one foot in the mud. And picking it up was like you have two pounds of mud on your foot. And it was like, I would not venture out of that at all.

In the morning, it was a lot better, but in the night, during it was like, you couldn't move. You just had to like, stay shelter in place, like it was a hurricane. I did that once.

I went for a walk with my friends. We went snowshoeing, but I didn't have snowshoes. So, like, my foot kept going, like, it's the exact same physics,

and you have to like, kind of walk on your knees, because like, you can't, if you walk straight, you just slide, and you're falling, and you're just like,

making a mud angel, and it's like, that's the worst, because there's no showers either, so you're just kind of like, you can't – if you walk straight, you just slide. Yep. And you're falling. You're just, like, making a mud angel. And it's, like, that's the worst. Because there's no showers either. So you're just kind of, like, muddy. Except for the spot. Yeah. Well, you just stand in the rain. The mud will eventually wash you off.

Man, that is a – that experience you just described is so far from anything I've ever done in my life. Like, I can't even – I brought a lot of people, though, to Burning Man. They were, like, I'll never do that. I'll never do that. Like, three people I brought were, like, okay. After one night, they were, like, I get it. Like, this feels, like, so – Man. They were like, I'll never do that. I'll never do that. Like, three people I brought were like, okay. After one night, they were like, I get it. Like, this feels, like, so free.

How did it start? I don't know. It's probably 25 years old. I don't want to give the wrong information. But a couple people. That's young. Yeah, it's not that old. Maybe 30, but something like that.

People just started it. They, like, they, I guess they did some organization with the Nevada land. And they were like, this is the perfect place to do it because you can just kind of move around. There's no rocks. It's just like one perfectly flat area. Like that's why it's there in that area called Black Rock. And then they just said, let's have like a really free, very hippie, you know, Bay Area guys. They just went over there.

And I met some of the owners of Burning Man, the guys who like created it. And they're really cool. I think they kind of, there's a lot of ownership changing the last couple of years. But like there's always been a really great ethos of like freedom of expression and radical inclusivity and like also radical self-reliance like you got to go with your stuff and make sure everything's out with you that's the main thing when i was leaving this other car passed me i was walking out she's like i said i saw i had a backpack on she's like she rolls the window down where's all your stuff at and i was like i just that's all i have like

i literally like friends gonna she was like i don's all I have. I literally, my friend's going to take it. She was like, I don't believe you. It was such a, they really want to make sure you got everything out of there. That's the main rule of Burning Man. If you brought anything there, you take everything out. So some people are mad at me that I left just a backpack. They don't believe that that's all I had. I really just had a backpack.

I'm one of the rich guys. I don't have to bring my shit, bro. I didn't have to bring a bunch of bacon to cook or whatever. We got the chef. I get that, though, that your friend like people you bring are like this is absolutely i think anywhere you go where people are having fun is fun yeah like it is be a burning man i wouldn't say that burning man is like my style by any means but if i like you'll find and also if i got i got you it's like it's like oh this is not my favorite sport but you're sitting front row it's like

it's still fucking awesome there really is something for everybody there but I mean even like stagecoach have you guys been to that festival no

I've never been to many festivals so like people in LA all go to Coachella and I started playing stagecoach the last couple years doing country stuff and I brought all my friends

that were like a little older like my age and they're going to Coachella and they're just kind of fed up with like the same thing

and then I took them to stagecoach they don't even like country music and every year they're like dressing the fucking with their hats on and like they're like kind of fed up with like same thing and then I was like I'm a stagecoach I don't even like country music and every year they're like dressing the fucking with their hats on and like they're like all

you know what it is that's easier to dress up and dive into the culture like like I'll go get some cowboy boots and a hat

when it's like when it was the peak of like EDC and all that that movement I remember I went to

I think maybe it was Electric Zoo I don't know whatever one was in Queens yeah it was Electric Zoo and I remember I went to, I think maybe it was Electric Zoo. I don't know. Whatever one was in Queens. Yeah, it was Electric Zoo. And I tried to dress up for that. And I was like... With a tutu on? But that's what I mean.

I couldn't. It was just like, I put on a pink shirt. And I was like, this is all I've got. Because I wouldn't even know where to begin or something like that. But a defined thing of, like, cowboy vibe.

For sure, country cosplay is a lot easier. Yes. Just jump into it. If you really want to do, like, rave, I don't even dress like a rave. It's really hard. You can dress like a fucking astronaut or something. I don't know. I don't think, but house music, electronic music is so commercial now.

Like, even EDC, they do kind of, like, go out and really do the thing. But mostly, it's people just dress like this. They go out there and just even have, like, a Camelback. It's just, they do kind of like go out and really do the thing but mostly it's people just dress like this they go out there and just even have like a camelback to be cool just drinking taking some molly again you know drinking and just like when when did ecstasy disappear and molly become the thing i actually don't know the difference i really is there a difference i do know that because growing up i it was i heard ecstasy i think ecstasy is pressed pills i think and it's like someone could tell me i don't really know i i know that you're right but mdma is but mdma is like i'm also don't want

to mess this up but mdma is like something that is even prescribed for people but mda the m the second m is actually methamphetamine that's mdma yeah like when you get that in there it does kind of give you like it's like you're that's's why it's not just euphoria. Party drug. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think that's kind of dangerous too if you're taking like the meth. A little bit of meth is always – Then you have to like drink water. It's like that's why it's sometimes unsafe to do some of those things. That was what was funny at Electric Zoo.

I'm not like a big drug guy, so I was drinking and I was at like the Bud Light fucking tent. Yeah. Nobody there. And I'm like, you know, if you go to Citi Field for a baseball game, the beer line is fucking 200 people long. Stagecoach is beer. Yeah. It's like my favorite thing. I just love drinking beer, walking around.

It's like such a good vibe. Yeah, that sounds fun. Not a lot of ecstasy at stagecoach yet. Yeah. Yeah, it is the average. We're working on it. Heartbroken's coming out soon. Yeah, so yeah.

I'm kind of like, the dance tent tent I do like a honky tonk And there's maybe A little MDMA The line dancing guys They got a lot of energy They got their hips going And shit Yeah

If you could drop MDMA Into any event Oh that's a great question What would it be? If you could be like Bring an MDMA feel To any event Because I'll be honest

I'm just asking that Because while we're talking about All the different festivals and stuff man Super Bowl you could have fun I was thinking of January 6th

I was like that would be that would be those guys are really when they hit that real high and they enter that Nancy Pelosi's office

they get that they peak a lot more shits on the desk yeah they're like oh my god we took over the country. I was like, you dress up?

Oh yeah, I could dress up. I could have a fucking good time with boys. January 6th, yeah. I don't know. There's probably any event would be pretty weird. Any event. Family Christmas. Conclave with the popes, man.

Get nuts with it. Make all the cardinals take MDMA that'd be fucking sick a whole bunch of priests and bishop and shit

tripping would be awesome well actually this is funny you said this because there's a book called The Immortality Key and it's a

book about they think that the bible was written by people who were on LSD there's a drug that's actually made out of barley

and the guy who i took the plane with to like at a burning man wrote the book really and he was explained to me the whole time so actually that he and he's a it's a really big book he was giving speeches at burning man it's a really famous book now that kind of even like the church looks into it they think that some of the stories told in the bible were on like mushroom psychedelics it makes a lot of sense right um plug his book you're like you'll get to his walking on water like fucking right but like yeah like the burning bush burning maybe it's on maybe not mdma i don't think they had it back then but there is something that

one of the root elements of lsd is also in natural it's like part of a bar like barley like when you ferment barley it kind of does this one thing i don't i can't tell the story but read the book yeah immortality key immortality yeah i like that yeah so there's been a lot but people have been doing psychedelics forever i mean yeah when you think about like have you guys ever done ayahuasca no you guys should do it do the show the thing i i can't get past there everyone tells like the story and the experience they went through and they all just kind of yada yada through the violent puking and shitting and stuff and i'm like that does not sound great to me bro like the the end part has to be really fucking awesome for the beginning part of violent

shitting and puking i don't know man i drink like 10 beers and i do that there is like a resolution at the end of ayahuasca it's always different for other people but i think like the one thing people always say it's like an ego death so no matter what you do like you finish like you're like damn i feel really like i can i can make new challenges like i feel like i'm not that special it humbles you yeah in a really good way and i think a lot of like you like celeb types and like you know hedge fund guys they need that constantly we need something that brings it up a little bit look around remember when you were one foot deep at that trench yeah that's like where you're in the trenches that's baseline dude you guys are already on that high you don't need you're talking to a man who has had trench mouth

everyone they complain about trench foot i've had trench mouth That's not a joke His mouth turned grey one day It was like rotting Is that putting mouth disease? Same thing? I woke up and I was bleeding All grey and I was like dude what is this And he was like you have trench mouth And I was like

That makes me think of the trenches in World War 2 And he's like that's exactly where it's from And I was like well how the fuck did I, like, the trenches in World War II. And he's like, that's exactly where it's from. And I was like, well, how the fuck did I get it? And he said, you got it from stress. And I was like, I have to imagine I'm not as stressed as the guys were fighting chemical warfare. And he's like, I would imagine your baseline is a little different than theirs, but you're experiencing it. So how did you get to pills or something? I took, like, an antibiotic.

Your breath was probably kicking it wasn't great that was a bad that was a bad week for you yeah i didn't come to work that week uh you just mentioned before uh house music and all that shit going mainstream i think where you used is that um is that like weird when like it's almost like a band getting put on but a whole like genre you know where it's like hey i i liked them before they were big but all the fucking you know i think that didn't that didn't happen with dance music because i think dancers have been around forever i mean it started in you know in chicago detroit in america like from disco 70s to house everything it kind of skipped america though and went straight to europe yeah

so then it like turned into many different genres techno and it just kind of like when i go to europe they just have this really long history with dance music that kind of came back to america when you probably went to you know randall's island with avicii and swedish house it became it was really bright and big it missed all like the cool things that it did for 20 years so it kind of came back like that with Avicii and them

like 10-15 years ago but it wasn't a bad thing like it was like great everybody started going to dance parties and I think the last 10 years we kind of acclimated to like all the cool stuff

so now when you go out like I think Tale of Us was playing at Brooklyn Mirage this weekend super like heavy techno from Italy like everything's big

in America now like and it's all cool stuff like there's like young black DJs from detroit that are doing like really detroit techno music that are also touring all over america and i think now america just kind of is back to being everybody's kind of into it young people like young if you go to a college party right now they're playing like zach bryan and deep house that's like all the young people listen to so it's like it's good for everybody it's like good it's like good music again so it's it's not a bad thing yeah i mean there was that probably like 2010 11 12 13 whatever where it was like everything was a collab with with one of you guys right get a and calvin harris and you

yeah but that i mean that was some great fucking records there they were good but the lyrics kind of like peaked at like in the club hands up it was like really like no it was hard to tell but then when you see that when you hear like without you that was the usher song like those records are titanium with sia like they're like they're like epic epic records and it really american radio needed those like hooks to be like oh this is dance music and then you go it's like it was like the uh like the like the discovery drug you get like a big big pop record and then you go to like a rave and you're like oh what's this tent oh what's it they go what kind of music is this and you start like exploring a little more it's like sure it was it was the

gateway drug yeah those big records yeah then you get into it and like now it's kind of like when i played like you see they have like 40 stages like there's music everywhere all kinds of music's happening like uh you know even like hip-hop there's music everywhere. All kinds of music's happening. Even like hip-hop, there's just so much crossover now in cool ways. People are really, the fans are really pushing DJs into doing interesting things

and I think it's getting bigger every day and it's not a bad thing. Not in a bad way. What part of a supplier do you consider yourself if it's a gateway drug? I'm like the distributor and the dealer too

because I have a record label so I put out other people's records and i like find other artists and we put it out on my label it's called hide the higher ground it's like we do different house records and do different parties so we facilitate if you want to come to the party we do one we're doing like the one and we're doing one in brooklyn here in brooklyn mirage like october 12th two of them so that's like about to announce it Tomorrow The whole lineup But we do it We did Seattle We do a bunch of that Everywhere

Like we do parties everywhere And then we bring a lot of New young DJs And I make a lot of music too But You know What is the I've always been kind of confused

Between like What's the difference of like Being a producer Versus a DJ Versus like Like when it's When it's Your track Yeah you you are like you

make that beat but then there's djs who are just like djing right like you know what i mean like do you is it always like an original track or sometimes is it no when i play music i'll play like everything you know like i'll play yeah yeah i'll play like 10 be the records i make because i think those fans are want to hear that but i can when i go to vegas i'm playing three hours i'm playing like no of course but big records and i'm saying like uh like someone like dj khaled at one point was like just spinning records and djing parties then kind of becomes like a producer and then like are they making those songs or is it like I'm kind of maybe like an anomaly I don't understand it at all he's a good friend

I know he has a lot of producers he makes a lot of music he has like big records every rapper has to be on his album he always debuts like really high his marketing is always

so crazy and weird he's just so funny and you know he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like

he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like

he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like

he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like

he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's like he's he's like how much a comedian when you watch his like snapchat he watches instagram totally but i'm not sure he's like a really a producer i think he's more like a an a and r he likes someone yeah everybody's like oh this record is great put this guy on the record put that guy on the record but he kind of facilitated himself to become everything the

artist the dj you're always going to hear him play all i do is win yeah whenever he plays it he's a great i play with him all the time like you know big events and he's he has the big hits you know but when it comes like young guys like me and producers not that i'm a young guy but I play with him all the time. Big events and he has the big hits. But when it comes to young guys like me and producers, not that I'm a young guy, but there's a lot of young producers and DJs and they're all making their own music now. Guys like John Summit, Dom Dollar. They're really good producers.

Like what Ghetto was doing 20 years ago, making his music. But not all of them have to make music. Some of them are just selectors. They just like to go out and play records. Which is crazy. There's DJs everyone's got their friend

who's like don't let him touch the fucking phone it's gonna suck there's always these memes when you come home for Thanksgiving and it's like

oh how's your DJ career the grandma's like the son just arrives he's like a producer or whatever it's kind of embarrassing but like your new record Heartbroken

how does that come about you pick those people does the label like that record so they got in the middle of all this doesn't make that much sense i'm doing a lot of like dance music and like a burning man but i have a country project that's called like thomas wesley and the last single is heartbroken so uh we have this record um amy allen wrote it and uh ilse juber they're like two songwriters that i really like amy allen's yeah she's really i saw you now i'm like here it was mercury lounge or something like two songwriters that I really like. Amy Allen's fire. She's really good. I saw Amy Allen like here

at Mercury Lounge or something like that. She's awesome. That's where I, when a friend took me, she's awesome. So you know, I know she writes great records

and I love Ilse Juber. I've written with her for like Beyonce. I'm also a writer so like I'll make some music on some chords and someone will sing on it and we had this song

and it was called Heartbroken and we asked Jessie Murph to sing it because she's like a really cool young artist and then Ron Perry who runs Columbia is like let's get a rapper on it so we can kind of like just hit all the marks so go to polo g's fans country fans and it was kind of perfect collab and we just put them all together

had her sing it she did some tweaks to do a little writing and so there's probably seven people all together writing the record and then it's my art that's my record like it's it's like diplo's record with jesse murph apology and that's kind of just with a major label they kind of put it all together like a little like a little math equation is that what you like I remember I mentioned Failing Up earlier and when you're on Failing Up you talked about how like you actually don't really like producing you said you said you prefer I just I hate this I hate like it's like more like sound design it's kind of like what your edit what your producer's doing you know when your show's done you guys walk away yeah someone's got to put it all together.

That's the part I hate. I have to do that. I have to make the music and then sit in the computer and make it sound good and engineer it, EQ it, and stuff like that. I do everything, so that is the lamest part. That's the busy work. It makes you like, I hate being a producer, that part. But sometimes you can have fun and make some really crazy music. I mean, someone like Skrillex is like a Mozart of Ableton.

He just makes things that you've never heard or like Fred again. You've seen his videos of him playing with NPCs and stuff. Some guys are just like savants when it comes to the production side. I'm more into editing the drums and playing a little guitar and finding a good song. But it does take a lot of time to make it. The final product is way different than what you hear. What you hear is just maybe a guitar and me humming or something and then the final project is like 45 versions later. So it takes a while to get it good

You also mentioned in that one like and I think in that same sentence you were talking about how you prefer like I don't remember who it was you got in a room with be like I love getting in the room And like we were like 20 songs in 20 hours Have you ever had like a session like that where you like you come out and you're like you put out you know the 20 songs you wrote whatever and one song pops off and you're like wait that's the one you like that's not no this is the good one happens all the time really even the country album i did i did a record that i really loved with sturgill simpson and um doug cameron we like just loved the record so much and it came out it

didn't really go anywhere. That's crazy. It's like, wow, but you just never know. You just roll the dice when it comes to TikTok and what happens, what people like. People just gravitate

towards something. It might be a meme. It could be someone sings it at a soccer... You don't even know. It literally, you can't control it. It used to be able to control it.

The labels really had some kind of like, we're going to put all this money here but now really, they just put out records and hope that something good happens. Do you resent that? No, because that's just the business. Some records, I don't even like that.

This record called On My Mind. It was a house record, but some guy did a dance to it, and it went viral. There's a record called Harlem Shake. Do you guys remember this record? Yeah, of course. That was on my label, and this guy was like the pink guy. He was frozen they started doing the dance and then next thing you know hillary clinton does the dance so that song

was brought by artist named bauer and actually joji is the pink guy the artist named joji was like actually a meme guy back in the day on youtube and um the record came out and this thing happened it went viral and it was the first first number one on Billboard as an instrumental record ever. I started counting YouTube views back then. So everything changes. And as a producer, it's just my job to move with it. And you can't be mad, bro. If you're mad, then you sound like an old-ass hater.

You just got to keep moving. But there's still got to be sometimes like, this isn't the good song, you asshole. In private, I'm like, fuck these little kids and this fucking algorithm. Yeah, I do that. But not on an interview. I love it all. You're writing a song. You're like, I know Blippi's going to shit on his friend over this one.

Did you see that? You know that guy, Blippi? No, it was Blippi. Blippi? Blippi sounds like he could be a fucking DJ, too. No, Blippi is a children's YouTuber. And my kids watch him. He wears a hat with a little propeller and suspenders.

And he's like, kids today, we're going to go to the museum. We're going to look at dinosaurs. Like Blue's Clues kind of yes yes prior to that though because he just he just got a gig as like an actor prior to that he was kind of trying to be like an internet fucking shock value videos so you know the whole vibe of like when the beat drops onto the Harlem Shake the room changes or whatever so it was like him and his friend were like dancing. And then when the beat drops, his buddy is fucking laying down on his back with like his legs over his head. And he shits onto his buddy,

like, like explosive diarrhea. He basically like diarrhea is into another person's ass. It just got found or it's been around for a while. Oh, I knew about it when it first happened. And then like, it was like, about it when it first happened and then like it was like

wait that guy became and then he became a kid's fucking guy what was his name it was like he had some stupid name I'll say this

it's fucking funny it's fucking funny dude I mean it's incredible accuracy the poop is a solid poop and it suits it's no it's not

it's just like a fountain He hits his mark He was trying to shit into a guy's ass and he did it You're not going to watch it twice But when you watch it you're going to laugh I actually never watched Two Girls One Cup I never watched it I'm happy

That is You can skip that You can miss that I remember my friend's sister making me watch it and I was really gagging the whole time

but I'm happy I watched it like um you got through it I've been through war man you know I feel like I have to watch everything yeah

when we were kids I remember the faces of death hell yeah VHS people were trading on the back market like the schools like the new all that shit

faces of death and e-bombs world. Rotten.com. E-fuck. Rotten.com. Rotten.com. Like, that bred, for better or worse, that's, like, why that generation, why we are the way we are. Yeah.

It's kind of. Because that was back, your parents were probably like, what's the internet? Oh, you're, like, looking at pictures? Okay. It's like, yeah, but they're pictures of people with their faces ripped off. You know? I just watched a little girl got hit by a train mom tommy sent it over yeah said if i don't watch he's not gonna pick me first at gym tomorrow it's really different because back in the day you had like there's always like an abandoned house

that had like a penthouse magazine in it or whatever that was the only time you got something something weird then the internet happened so you had an abandoned house that you watched you looked at your porn? There was a, no, there was a, my grandpa lived in this place in Georgia.

I remember there was always this abandoned house that was in the neighborhood. We always went over our bikes to it and we were like, there's always a porno in this house. So we, what we've found

in talking to everybody we've ever talked to is you either come from a town that has a weird communal porn thing or you don't. so like i grew up outside of philly for a little bit and we used to ride our bikes to the woods to look at there was a big box of porno and i'll i'll tell that story and you know one guy goes like yo dude me and my town too

but he was like what the fuck are you guys talking about because if you don't have that you're like you had a box of porn in the woods, but everybody who did experience it, it's like, yeah, it's the box of porn in the woods. Like, what do you mean?

It's weird, but I think it's like our age because we just didn't have any access to information. Like, it was like, it was like literally, you couldn't go buy it

unless you had like a weird bodega or something. Right. I'll tell you what, but yeah, porn on paper. Dude, porn on paper sounds like

that's a good album name. We used to hand, we had one magazine at hockey camp that we like, literally like, we that's a good album we used to hand we had one magazine at hockey camp that we like literally like got into a movie like pass under

fucking bathroom stalls and stuff it was that's gross it was not it was not nice probably the pages were real hard

dude one had a fucking target on it one I swear one I swear to god you guys were just sharing it just before bro

we'd share it and then we'd page with a five bucks and put icy hot on our balls don't let guys hang out together it's crazy before wet wipes and stuff. Bro, we'd share it, and then we'd pay each other five bucks to put Icy Hot on our balls. Don't let guys hang out together. It's crazy that you would let us hang out together in groups. What's Icy Hot on the balls do? It fucking hurts, bro. Torches you.

It's incredibly painful. I asked earlier, do you resent about people liking the wrong song? Do you have a song where you're like out and you're like, I don't want to do this fucking song again. And then you're like, I got it. Cause you're talking about like playing the big tracks

for him and stuff like that. But where you're like. I mean, there's always, I started as like a songwriter. I didn't just become like a famous DJ. So I moved to LA. I was like just in sessions with whoever.

Like I was like, they put me in a room, like just write a record, make something happen. You know, one of the guys was Bruno Mars back in the day. He was not even a popping guy, but he was in my first sessions. And I'm just like, this guy is really fucking good. Like he of the guys was Bruno Mars back in the day he was not even a poppin guy but he was in my

first sessions and I was just like this guy is really fucking good like he was writing for Flo Rida back then like writing the raps Bruno Mars used to

write for Flo Rida he did the raps for Right Round Baby Right Round no way dude and I was like this guy is way and I ended up

having an album cut on his record called Liquor Store Blues that was like probably one of the first records I like wrote with somebody and then so I've done

lots of stuff like little bits and pieces here and there. I've never been like, I wish I didn't do that. I've never had a moment where I'm like, I've always been kind of proud of what I've done, all the music I've made. So you don't mind playing any song now? Some songs are just a little old or cheap. I just don't feel like, I'm not like, I'm always excited to play a brand new record.

That's what a DJ does. We break new records. It feels good. Sometimes I'm like, I'm always excited To play like a brand new record I'm always excited That's what a DJ does We like break new records It feels good Kind of Sometimes I'm like Damn my fans still want to hear Like this song And I'm like It's okay

I kind of I always thought I was always kind of Of the school of thought Like what's your hit Like I think Eminem Went through that Where he didn't want to do

Slim Shady And I think Avril Lavigne That skater boy I'm sure everyone's had it done I mean Stones bro They're still like 80 And they're still doing like Fucking

Start me up It's like every night Like with the same stones, bro. They're still like 80 and they're saying they're still doing like fucking every night. Like with the same energy. That's like, they're telling us we got to wrap up before we do. I got, I got to ask you, do you remember the rivalry you had with Frankie Borelli? Dave's,

uh, Dave's cameraman. He, he, it was, you guys were at the sports illustrated party. Okay. And,

and, uh, he, he like tried to follow you into a VIP section. Okay, yeah. And you were like, who the fuck are you? And then the guys here baited him into posting an Instagram saying, like, fuck you, Diplo, and you posted something back.

Does any of this ring a bell? I do remember that moment because I remember that was another thing that happened at that Sports Illustrated party, but I don't remember what the beef was. There really was none. Apparently he had a stack of Dave's cash and he put it up to his ear

and said something like, talking shit to you, and then you posted your own Instagram and didn't mention him, but you had two stacks of cash. Oh, that's good. That's good.

That party was nuts, though, because it was all Sports Illustrated models. It was in Arizona, I think, or Phoenix, and I was like, behind me was this one model, I'm not going to name her name,

but she had all this MDMA, and she just gave it to every model. And so it was just all the models. It was all the big old models from that episode. That's why you remember it. They were all just so. I was like, why is everybody having so much fun here? Because these parties are not that cool with models.

It's like, I don't want to be here. I've got stuff to do. I've got a kid to go to. And they were all in sync, like dancing and sweating. It was really sweaty. We need more of this. The party needs to keep going. I'm changing my answer.

They're telling me you gotta go. Love you guys.