KFC Radio - Dr. Phil Returns, America's Dong & We've Found the Perfect Marriage

Episode Date: September 15, 2020

Subscribe, Rate, and Leave a Review! -We recap the first weekend of NFL games. The Jets lose. The Patriots win. Sky's blue. -Chris Evans accidentally posted a d*ck pic online -The disturbing Netflix movie Cuties -Top 5 Gameshows -Voicemails include the perfect marriage and ransom amount (01:43:30) Dr Phil returns to the show! We ask him to weigh in on some of the most popular AITA's we've discussed on the show, his thoughts on the controversy surrounding Ellen, and much more. Let us know what you think on twitter: @KFCRadio @KFCBarstool @Feitsbarstool @DrPhilYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I feel like Chris Evans' penis did not get the attention it deserved. We won't come down. And the sun can't stop us now. What's it going to? It's taking over you. It's another edition of KFC Radio on the Barstool Sports Network. Coming to you on a, we're recording right now on a Monday morning, our first football Monday.

Feels terrible. Feels pretty good. Feels terrible. I haven't had a sports day like that in a long time. What do you mean? So yesterday, so I was at a bar for 16 straight hours on Saturday. So yesterday was like a complete wash for me. Were you just eradicated?

I watched the Pats, and then I fell asleep during the Bucs. At the bar? No, no, no, no, no. I was at a bar for 16 hours on Saturday. Oh, okay. Got it, got it, got it. So yesterday, I was just like, I just laid on the floor. So I don't have any furniture in my apartment yet. Right.

And I just laid on the floor. I ended up sleeping on the floor last night. You are a dumpster dwelling trash baby. I mean, like, I was just laying on the floor. I had like a sheet as if that would matter anything. It's like, actually, it's my weighted blanket, which is actually shockingly more uncomfortable because it's filled with beads. Yeah.

So I just laid on it. It's like laying on a thing. Beads! You are like, it's like a teenage mother gave birth to you and threw you away in the dumpster and you survived. And you just lived in the garbage your whole life. And that's where you now dwell.

That is crazy. I slept until like 7 o'clock this morning. The sun woke me up. And then I went to bed after that. So you went through. So you woke up and watched the Pats, and then went back to bed. And then once Brady threw his second pick, I was like, fuck this game. See you later. I'm going to go to bed.

And by go to bed, I mean I just closed my eyes. You closed your eyes on the same spot on the floor. Well, yesterday was the Jets kickoff. The Mets need to win pretty much every game. And the Islanders. What, to make the playoffs? Yeah. Give up that dream.

I already did. But the Mets are crazy. The Mets have who's going to win his third straight side. He's like, what, a 1-4 ERA? It's like 1-6. There's actually a couple other guys in the mix this year. Like, last year was like, no way. Yeah, I looked at it, but it's like, Yu has like, Yu doesn't, like, Yu's got like

a fairly comfortable ERA, but like, he's not even close on strikeouts. Exactly. And then Bauer's the other one, but Bauer's gonna have like a full like, less start than Jake, which kind of throws everything off. But I think like, Jake is just, he's just so fucking consistent. He's, like, I don't know what the other guys are gonna do. do he's gonna he's gonna play us like two or three more starts he's

gonna do it every time so i think he's gonna be three straight cy youngs i think they're gonna have like three guys get legit mvp votes they have like a good team and they're just terrible and they're just bad yeah i mean their bullpen's not good and and their rotation doesn't have names but like they've pitched well enough at times. Just with that offense and at least the Cy Young, they should be better than they are. And they're just like, oh, no, they're terrible. It's like, oh, no, you're bad. It's so stupid.

They're under 500, which already is like... Under 500, we're like, well, maybe we'll win the playoffs. Under 500, they've won four series the whole year. It's just like... That's a bad team. But there's a bunch of i mean it is a weird season where like everyone in the hunt is like 22 and 26 you know it's like it's a weird season so like it could happen but you know i canceled them a long time ago but i'm like all right listen you know anything can happen then mathematically they're only a couple games out

could happen let's go but they were playing the blue jays they like faltered leading into it i knew they needed to win and then the islanders like you know they lose to go down three one you're pretty much fucked yeah and i woke up and i knew like exactly what was going to happen to a t like 100 precisely how this one fold the jets will have one of their embarrassing like bad losses the mets like they just get they just beat the Blue Jays 17-2, and Jake, like, cruised. I was like, this is where they bounce back and stink, and that's what happened.

And the Islanders, you know, I'm not going to pretend like the Islanders broke my heart, but it is just part of the loser culture in New York, and they get, like, their doors blown off. And never in doubt, never in doubt, I was making a goddamn Jets video being like, all right, I'm talking to Jackie. I'm like, all right, so all three of these teams are going to lose.

And I'm going to start the morning optimistic, and then we'll see me get miserable. I literally scripted a show based on it because I knew it was going to happen. And, I mean, because this has never happened before. We have playoff hockey, baseball, and football together. And I was like, so of course this will go terrible. And it did. And then I'm like, so of course this will go terrible. And it did. And then I'm like, why do I do this? What is the point?

I feel so bad for you. What is the point? I genuinely feel bad for you. What is the point? Because when I have a bad team, I have the Red Sox this year. And they always have something to bounce back on, to fall back on. I also have the New England Patriots. And they're a Jake DeGrom type consistent.

And then, you know, what didn't go well, but even if you wanted to, you're like, and I'll dabble with the Bucs, and I can like enjoy that. Even,

you know, even if it doesn't go well, you can enjoy it. I can't even enjoy these things. And everything's getting worse. Like, Sam Darnold's getting worse. Sam Darnold's probably a bad quarterback now.

I don't think, I don't think he's a bad quarterback, but I think when you, when you, when you're in that system, and your coach is bad, and your weapons are bad, and then you start to force things and you and you get desperate and then what is it third year yeah it's like it's like this is your you know it's kind of like time

to take the step forward and if you don't then what like do you keep do you give him an extension does he even want to sign an extension with you i'd want to get the fuck out of here but by then he's probably going to have like bad habits and a bad like mental makeup and you become a bad player the jets will make you bad even if you're not bad and so round and around we go and i'm like i the ultimate irony is like the jets will kill me before i can even make it to the steve cohen mets wouldn't that be something if i don't even get to see the cco mets because you find me hanging from the fucking ceiling because of like week five of the Jets. I mean, it's gonna be a long season if it's like that.

And I get to the point where I'm just like, why do I do this? I've been doing it so long, so long. When I was like mid-20s, it was just kind of like, I don't know, this is life. I'm mid-30s now and it's always the same. It's like I put on the same show every time and i watch the same ending every time and it's not what i enjoy so why do i do it i don't have a good answer for you yeah there is no because there is like you know what people say do you know people say they say well when it does happen it'll make it it'll make it better well two things one it's never

gonna happen two i think it's beyond that point i I think when it happens, I'll be mad. It's almost like a mom with their asshole kids, and they're being dicks all day long, and then they do something sweet at the end of the day at dinner time, and it's like, well, why couldn't you have fucking done this the last 12 hours? I'm almost going to be bitter. It's like, oh, so you could have done it this whole time, but you just didn't? You're capable of acting like not a piece of shit?

Yeah. Where was that the whole time, dicks but children are capable of doing that i don't think the jets are right i don't know the mets are i mean the islanders are again you said that it's not like uh you know pretend that broke your heart but also they i mean they're in the eastern conference yeah yeah they've had a good season yeah but like also that's that's part of it is like even when the mets are good they like falter at the very end in an embarrassing way and like even when the jets made their run like they blew that game against the sealers that would have sent them to the super bowl so like even when they're good

they're bad even when they're good they're heartbreaking so ultimately there's always heartbreak at the end of the tunnel at the end of the rainbow so why do i do it i'm getting too old i'm getting too old for this. I'm too old for this. What else could you possibly do? Nothing. I don't have any other interests. I don't have any other hobbies. That's why I just work.

And it's just like, well, I have to find something else that is not. You know what the problem is? When you give your emotions over to something that's completely fickle. I have no control over that. It's not like I'm playing in the games you know i mean that's why you know i don't even know what to say because i genuinely feel bad to say anything like it's just like yeah that suck i don't i i don't know chap seems to like woodworking because you know what it is like it's like if i came to you and i was like i i really don't like my girlfriend you'd be like break up with her but i'm coming to you being like i don't like my mom

and my dad and it's like you can't that's like that's a tough that's an accurate analogy but can't pick your family you know tough like they are they were just given to me you know they were like and you know what it's all because of the fucking designated hitter. What do you mean? My grandfather was like a Yankee fan. Born in the Bronx, he was a Yankee guy. He was such a baseball purist that he hated the DH. He was like, fuck this.

I'm a Mets fan now. Shut up. And then so was his daughter, and then so was I. And had I been a Yankee fan, I probably would have been a Giants fan because, you know, all those things just like go hand in hand. So the designated hitter ruined my life. The designated hitter ruined my life. It genuinely did. Yep. Stupid fucking rule. It's a dumb fucking rule.

That's stupid fucking rule. See that's like almost like my life is very different but like I'm not Jewish because my great great great I think it's three grades grandfather fell in love with an Irish girl and she she was like, no sex before marriage, and also you're going to become a Catholic.

And he's like, all right, fine. So you do have Jewish family members, but they converted or whatever? Yeah, we've done this before. They're Jewish Germans. Right, right. The JGs. And they were okay. Probably the bad ones.

They were still around, so, you know, there's only one way that happens. Yeah, like, these butterfly effect things, you know, they change, they change it all. But mine is a particularly stupid one where it's like this... I mean, if I were you, I would rebel against my grandfather and be like, fuck it. Yeah, well, I mean... You have too much hate for the Yankees in your heart, but I... Definitely. It's too late now.

It's way too late now. It's definitely too late, but, like... That's what I meanes in your heart, but I... Definitely. It's too late now. It's way too late now. It's definitely too late, but like... That's what I mean when people say, like, then just stop. It's too late. It's a different fan. It's like, why don't you just pick different parents? You just can't do that. Well, I just want you to become a Sox fan.

Like, you hate the Yankees. Yeah, yeah. Well, I basically am, though. I feel like the hatred... With the Mets, it's tough with you, but I feel like your hatred of other teams is stronger than your love for teams. Yes, and that's why I do get some satisfaction out of sports. Like, every year in baseball for the past decade plus,

the last 20 years other than 2009, I've had a moment in the playoffs where I'm like, and it's just when the Yankees lose and when the Patriots lose. So I can enjoy sports, but my hatred for teams is bigger than my love for my teams. But my response when it happens, it's always just like, all right, that's good. But man, I don't, you know what I mean? Like my team still never wins.

So I still need that to happen to ever experience happiness. And it's never going to happen. Never going to happen. I mean, maybe, I mean, I don't know. Steve Cohen, I think takes over today. Literally. Oh, does he really? Literally today.

I honestly didn't know that was official. Yeah. Yeah. Literally. Oh, does he really? Literally today. I honestly didn't know that was official. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So like the majority of, well, I guess the majority of like ownership transfers over, but then it has to be like ratified in November with the owners, which I believe.

How much did they sell for? It was like 2.325 or something like that. Nice chunk of change. You know what's funny though? It's like he originally offered 2.6. He originally offered 2.6 and the Wilpons got to stay for five years. He saved $300 million, and they get out right away. So Steve Cohen's like, great deal.

That's where you're going. Great fucking deal. So hopefully that happens, and hopefully that changes everything. But I've got to make it there first, and at this rate, I don't know if I fucking will. Patriots won, though. Yeah, they did. And, God, that post-game outfit was just. You know why I really hate you? I fucking will. Patriots won, though. Yeah, they did.

And God, that post-game outfit was just... You know why I really hate you? Like, who did I say this to yesterday? Somebody I was watching with. I think maybe Nick. I was just like, this is... You watched here yesterday? Yeah. Oh.

I was like, this is so perfect for you personally. He's this, like, swaggy dude who churns out quotes and dresses awesome. That was one of my biggest fears with losing Brady was that not only post game fits, but just like merch. Brady is a merch machine because you can just put anything on a fucking shirt. I would actually

argue that Cam is more of a merch machine. Brady does things and occasionally said things that were like you can make into merch. Cam is like trying to make you merch. Cam's like, I'm going to try to to he's like a rapper he's dropping bars you know i don't get butterflies i give them that's like that's like a fucking rap line you know so you probably even upgraded in that department i think somehow you upgraded in the fits department you probably only downgraded on the field you know and i wouldn't even i would argue i think that tom brady dresses

better than cam in my mind cam Cam dresses more ridiculous than Tom Brady. Cam dresses. I would never wear a Cam Newton, but I wear a Tom Brady. But Cam can wear. Cam can dress like Cam. Yeah, he can pull that off. And yesterday's game was. I mean, they're Halloween costumes.

He doesn't put on outfits. He puts on costumes. It's like, what did you wear? What was your wardrobe change for your post-game press conference? It's ridiculous. And the fit he wore going in was amazing. And then the game itself was amazing. See, I've been part of a high-flying offense for so long

that it's nice to see it the other way. The grind it out type shit. And it's almost more impressive, if that makes sense. Or it's more fun because you're dictating your will more yeah yeah there's nothing i'm gonna jam this down your throat yeah and there's nothing you can do and then like also the points like they they should have it should have been 31 was it 31 14 something like yeah whatever it was uh i think it was 24 14 was a final it should have been 31 like it should have been kind of a blowout right the n Harry fumbled to the goal line. We had Nick Fogelman

miss a kick, obviously. It should have been a perfect Patriots blowout. And then that post-game press conference, that quote, the college park in me almost came out when he was ready to fight the whole fucking team. I forget. First of all,

if you're going to snatch someone's chain, you have to snatch it. You can't fail to snatch the chain. And First of all, if you're going to snatch someone's chain, you have to snatch it. Yeah. You can't fail to snatch the chain. And second of all, you forget that, like, Cam Newton, he had his, you know, he had his history, like the Auburn, the community college and all that shit. Florida. He was still on laptops. Right. He was a grimy dude.

And like, you know, it seems like he's pretty much cleaned that up almost entirely. It's all kids and Superman and funny commercials and a million-dollar smile. But that's still in there if it needs to come out. Dude, the Auburn thing is one of the most impressive things that's ever happened in sports. Which is how good he was? You know no one else on that team ever took a pro snap? Really?

And he won the national championship. That's insane. Yeah, that's wild. Like, that team that's like the 0-1 Miami team or whatever. At least that's like Star Wars I'm talking about. Yeah. It's like, oh, yeah, seven people on this defense wanted to have, like, illustrious pro careers. Right.

No one else took a snap. The team that, like, they always talk about with the U that had, like, backups who were, like, first-round picks. Right. Weren't they even still, like, it was like them and Ohio State were kind of like, well, which is the disputed champion, you know? Like, that's crazy. And then he does it with literally no one else. Because Cam Newton won a national championship.

Crazy. And, I mean, look, it's going to be a fun year, I think. I'm excited. Fuck you! You know what I'm going to be a fun year, I think. I'm excited. Fuck you! You know what I'm going to do? Also, I'm also interested to see what happens in Tampa Bay. That was... It wasn't like a terrible performance.

It wasn't terrible, but it was not... But I'm more interested in what Bruce Arians said afterwards. Yeah, he just blamed him for everything, right? So Brady's switching up. He's going, I didn't like the private criticisms. Which I don't fault him for me right so like brady's switching up he's going i didn't like the private criticisms right and like which i don't fault him for you like i would definitely get sick of just someone was like treating me like i was a rookie every year when i'm like i'm not a rookie i'm the greatest player ever i want some slack yeah but like at least uh belichick would do it privately

yeah like publicly is an interesting move unless it was like almost like discussed or agreed upon or something like, you know, we need to like change things here and I'm not going to be different than anybody. And it wasn't like you leaned into them and you think those are bad decisions. Yeah. And I wouldn't like that. These are the things, yeah, where you have to like be put, you know, at the end of the day, it's still real life, right?

And if you like started a new job and your manager at like a press, at a presentation said like, well, you know, like our last week we didn't hit like our quota because, you know, we got this new guy who's like, you know, he didn't know the ropes yet. And he'd be like, you go home to your wife and be like, fuck this guy. You know, and maybe you would cool down eventually and be like, no, I get it. Like, we got to get on the same page, whatever. But in the moment, you're definitely like, wait, you said what? Fuck you, man. I did my job. You didn't do it.

So like. And then like, right, right. Especially when you know, like he did just leave Tampa Bay, New England because of all that. The reason he left was not football. I don't know if it was the sole reason. No, but it was a person, you know, it was like, you know, your feel, his emotions were like why he left. Like he either was felt disrespected or felt like, you know,

this is the end of the road. I've just gone too long, but it was never like, Oh, this is a bad football situation. I got to go. It was like, I don't like this.

So you better like where you're going. And if the first thing that happens is your new boss says like, yeah, you probably aren't, you're not liking that. I mean, he's gotta be, he probably did not go home and French kiss his kids that night.

He was probably very angry. No action for the boys. He also said he was on the Armchair podcast, Dax Shepard's. Yeah. And Dax asked him, does he fuck on game day? Or at least pre-game, I don't know about post-game. And he said he does not fuck on game day. I could have guessed that.

I would, yes. It's just a time thing. See, I actually. You got to get to the ballpark. You got to get to the field like fucking hours early. I would think yes. It's just a time thing. See, I actually... You gotta get to the ballpark. You gotta get to the field, like, fucking hours earlier. I would think it would get me... Now, obviously, I've never participated in professional sports, but I feel like that, like,

sex in the morning just wakes me up. It's almost like a cup of coffee. Yeah, but I don't know if there's those boxers who don't fuck on fight night, or at all, when they get up to the fight. That, to me, we've had this discussion before. I feel like you have like a cloudy brain and you're like

you're an insane person I get like irritable you're like I'm gonna keep all my testosterone in me shut up that doesn't fucking you're an idiot do you know dolphins

come 85 miles an hour excuse me yeah the cum comes out of them at like a violent rate like it would kill a human 85 miles an hour yeah so I googled this and I saw

how fast is a human well so I googled it and I saw anywhere from 10 to like 31 but uh in the process I also saw this, and I saw... How fast is humans? Well, so I Googled it, and I saw anywhere from 10 to, like, 31. But in the process, I also saw... I would guess I'm throwing an Ephus. Yeah.

John's a knuckleballer. He's slow and just wobbly. I mean, you know, when you... If you, you know, wait... Somehow, if you can, like, wait a couple days, I feel like I'm blasting off at, like, Mach 5. Yeah, or if you're still in a bag of peas. Yeah, apparently. we never know that one from experience with the peas i've never done it either i just we should you know what we should do it we should do it we don't have to film it or anything but we

should just do it and report back like the pea shooter literal pea shooter uh but i then i also read like in the same like little blurb when i was looking up how fast miles per hour we come that it said like the the like proper amount would be 21 like ejaculations in a month which i guess you know if you're talking bare minimum that does make sense like two out of every three days wait you should only come 21 times a month that was like kind of i guess the minimum kind of like to throw heat no in order to just be like you know it's like a healthy man. Like, you should be going through that bodily function 21 times. At least. You do it like 20 times a weekend. A week max.

Yeah. Max. I mean, I got to get the poison out. I literally feel a change in my demeanor. There are times where I'm like, like I said, irritable and like foggy. I'm kind of like being like nasty. And then I like come and i'm like oh that was it probably had like this this fucking like chunk of poison in me festering i

got it out i i had i had masculinity in me yeah right i needed to get that's why i was being an insufferable ass when they say toxic masculinity that's not a that's not a a state of mind that's like the green like ooze from Ninja Turtles. I have toxic sludge inside me. It's called cum. And I gotta get it out of me. Yeah, I feel like nicer people masturbate more. Yes.

Right? Yeah. How did we get here? Where did we just come up? Football? Yep. Coming on game day, and then I brought up dolphins. That's how it goes but like to me

your dick is just a tool that's another thing do you know why you that's a perfect segue I knew where we were going yeah do you know why your dick is shaped the way it's shaped like with the tip it's shaped? Like with the tip?

It's to scoop out other men's... Yeah, other men's cum. Like back in the K-Man days. I mean, I guess these girls were just getting loads in them to the point that it was like, I gotta have a piece that's shaped like a shovel so I can get in there and dig it out at the same time.

But it was like, get their cum out and get my cum out. Can we Google that? And also... I know it from a Netflix movie. It seems unnecessary. Well. Well, like, how much sperm is just sitting in the vagina? Sitting in there. I mean, I guess if you're talking, like, you know, primal-type shit where, like...

Also, if I fucked you, like, say for the first time, my dick goes in. And there's a load in there. And it comes out, and I have a cum on my dick. I'm going to be upset. But that's why. I don't think it happens anymore. I think it was that way. I think it's non-intelligent design.

I think it's unnecessary. Well, there's a lot. I mean, the dick being attached to the middle of your body is non-intelligent design. I don't believe that. Because also. Because you fucking rock. Because also, like, that's humanity that made the shovel thing it was just a fucking i think it's all it was a sheath beforehand we cut off the extra that's why i don't that's why i don't know

if i believe that that fact about pulling the cum out because when it had a hood over it it would not have had that that like ledge although the idea i believe is when you get hard, you know, the sheath is gone, right? I mean, from experience in films, yes. Yeah. So when you're entering, you still have the lip when you are hard. Sometimes. So then how is an uncircumcised dick better for anal then? Because that's what Jessa Rhodes told us. So that I understood.

Well, yeah, you're right. Because if you pull it all the way back then it's just supposed to be like a normal dick but the way jessica kind of described it was like her ass just like stays wrapped around the the the foreskin and it's just you're going in and out of your own foreskin you're basically fucking your own foreskin is what's happening i don't know if i believe all that but jessa would certainly know better than i do so uh yeah anyway the lucky the lucky ones of us like of the world who get circumcised don't have to deal with this and there has never been a more circumcised man than chris evans i mean they didn't leave a speck of foreskin on that guy. They carved that thing like it was chiseled from stone. It looked like, somebody said it looked like the banister at the end of your,

like the banister on the steps, which just has a knob on top. It looked like a totem pole that was carved into it. I mean, that thing is a tip. It looks like a true mushroom. I can't pull it up again. Oh, it's a great cock. It's a into it. I mean, that thing is a tip. It looks like a true mushroom. I can't pull it up again. Oh, it's a great cock. I was looking at it on Saturday. It's a great cock.

And for those who don't know, Chris Evans, accidentally, I do actually believe accidentally. Some people are speculating, maybe not. But either way, accidentally, pseudo accidentally leaked his own dick pic by putting up a screen recording on Instagram where the end of it had his camera roll. And one of the small little thumbnails was his dick kind of in like a shadowy black and white picture and Pat I didn't realize this but Pat said it was sticking out the bottom of his shorts of what Pat said black and white and sticking out the bottom of your shorts what is this 1999 and I couldn't really see that but it did it it was it was a little bit of a it wasn't like a you know let me hold my dick and take a

dick pic it was definitely him lounging on a couch't like a, you know, let me hold my dick and take a dick pic. It was definitely him lounging on a couch, just like popping it out, whether it was through the fly or at the bottom of his shorts or whatever. But to the surprise of no one, Captain America Chris Evans has a fucking cock on him. I can't tell, you know, it looks like a good dick. I can't tell if it's like huge, but like I said, chiseled from stone good shape, good size it's a cock. It's a cock that no girl's gonna be like, ugh.

They're all gonna love it. I can't find it right now. But as I'm looking for it Mark Ruffalo tweeted it. Way to politicize like that, dude. Read Mark Ruffalo's quote. Mind you, this is the Hulk.

This is his Avenger teammate. It was something along the lines of, OK, bro, while Trump is in office, there is nothing you could possibly do to embarrass yourself. See, silver lining. Kevin, if I ever accidentally post my cock on the Internet, just don't say anything. Don't tweet me being like, yeah, hey, bro, we don't like the president. Yeah, but I certainly – you know what? No. No.

I declined. If you ever accidentally tweet your cock, we're talking about it. Oh, no. I'm not going to politicize it. I'm not going to be like, hey, dude, New York's in shambles. de Blasio sucks. Your dick actually brightened up the day here in New York. No.

We're going to talk about it because you have to talk about it in new york no we're gonna talk about it because you have obviously we're gonna talk about it yeah but i'm surprised chris chris evans by now should have said something like uh you know i would have i saw a couple jokes floating around like that's america's dick because he did like that's america's ass with captain america remember he should make you know just tweet whoops yeah that would work whoops i mean i personally would really like if you just said that's america's cock lean all the way into it but this is i would i would say because there was there was some there was many different reactions there's mark ruffalo talking about donald trump weird you see your best friend's dick all of a sudden donald trump pops in your head you're the weird

are they friendly i mean obviously but like that's why like it's different like like if i i i can't even we're just in, very different stages of what we do professionally. But, like, if I was an actor and I tweeted my dick, don't say anything. Leave it alone. Yes, with what we do, we're going to talk about it. But I would also say... There was the other reaction was, like, out of respect,

like, let's not talk about it. That was the most harmless... That was a great dick leak. Yeah. He looks awesome. We'll talk about the other picture on the most harmless. That was a great dick leak. Yeah, he looks awesome. And we'll talk about the other picture on there, which I think is even better. But as far as the dick goes, I was like, you know, there wasn't anything too graphic. There was anything too sexual.

There wasn't anything like embarrassing to him and his family. It was just like, there's a dick. His stock actually went up from it you know so no need to like fucking like uh wait what if what if the picture the the leaked nude of him was fucking chris evans fucking doggy style yeah fucking like spreading his ass like that would be like all right that's too much but you know what even even for chris evans it'd be like you know if there's ever going to be a guy who's like on all fours with his ass spread that people would somehow still enjoy, it'd be Chris Evans. It is out of his shorts.

That was right. Bottom, like, that, you know what the worst part of it is, though? And this is the worst part of sending dick pics. Like, in your legs in it, and you're like, oh, you can just see my feet is weird. I've always hated that. Because then you know what I do, though? Like, I've tried to, like, get my feet

and my legs out of the picture, but then it looks like you're just, like, a floating dick. And then I feel like the recipient's going, well, wait, where are his legs? Are they, like, above his head? Did he tuck them behind? Like, what's going on here? The collateral damage from a dick pic is that you're going to see some man thigh and some toes.

Just is how it goes, you know? Like, my thigh is ridiculous. Like, how pale it is. I know. This is disgusting. And that's the other thing. Like, hot celebrity, like, I'll have, I'll have like the classic like shorts tan line. You know, like my knees, like from above my knee is tan and then my thighs get white and then my dick is Neapolitan ice cream.

There's all sorts of colors going on. The whole thing is a fiasco. I can't believe everybody even wants to see this thing. But the dick is whatever. We've all sent a dick pic. We all have pictures of our dicks, whatever. What I don't have is a picture of my own face looking very mugshot-esque. It might even be a mugshot from that show Defending Jacob with a red stamp font saying,

guard that pussy. What does that mean, John? He looks definitively like a rapist. Yeah, it looks like he's like, you guard that pussy for me because it's mine. What do you mean, John? He looks like definitively like a rapist. Yeah, it looks like he's like, I'm a guard. Like, you guard that pussy for me because it's mine. What do you think that is? Do you think, A, I mean, I hope it's a joke. I think we can agree it's some sort of joke.

B, like, did he make it? Do you think that's like, like, did someone else make that on the internet and he, like, saved it because it's funny? I would guess it's a save. Like, someone else tweeted that, like, there's some Captain America storyline where he's like, I got to guard America. And someone was like, they changed the guard that pussy for some reason. And then he saw that and saved it and sent it. I don't know.

It's a Captain America type thing. But you know what I mean? Like it's someone else made it. I would guess it was out there. Because I just can't think of a reason why, you know, why you'd have that. Why you would have to guard your pussy from me. Some of the memes, man.

Rhea tweeted that one. It was like, it's a stock photo of a person sleeping soundly at night. And it was just like me sleeping at night knowing that Chris Evans is guarding my pussy. But that's not what he's... I don't think that's what he's saying. What do you think he's saying? I think he's saying you have to guard it from me. See, I think he's...

I don't think he's like, I'm guarding your pussy. You better guard it from me. You better watch out. I'm coming for that pussy now again that can be problematic unless it's you know and that's like Olivia Munn situation maybe this is the male version of Olivia Munn he's sending that to her being like you better guard that pussy from other guys because that's mine I don't think that's fuck that ass I don't think it's from other guys I think it's watch out for me because I'm coming for that pussy. That works too.

That's got to be a consensual situation is all I'm saying now. Yeah. Well, yeah. I hope so. He doesn't have like a – does he have a wife and kids and shit? No. He doesn't even have a girlfriend, does he? I don't think so.

So it's like it could be your pussy. It could be your pussy. He does. He used to date fucking – Oh, yeah. Jenny Slate. Jenny Slate. Yeah.

That's a wild one. I think they're both Milton people I think. What does that mean? They're both from Milton. Milton, Massachusetts? I Slate. Jenny Slate. Yeah, that's a wild one. I think they're both Milton people, I think. What does that mean? They're both from Milton. Milton, Massachusetts? I think so. Oh, wow. Chris Evans definitely is.

Okay, but still. It could be from the same hometown and not necessarily date someone I would not. If there was a celebrity from my hometown and I had whatever this is we have, I'd be like, I'm going to date that person. Yeah. Right, right. He's got to give it a shot. We got to link up and see how it goes. Yeah. I'd be like, I'm going to date that person. Yeah. Right, right. We at least got to give it a shot. We got to link up and see how it goes. Yeah.

But I think without being too rude here, I would say that the Hugh Jackman marital situation and the Roger Federer marital situation, those three things blow my mind. What do you mean? Have you ever seen their partners? Hugh, I have. Yes. I don't know. I don't think I've seen them at all.

No Federer. It's just not what you'd expect just not a they are not matching up in the looks department really really well i actually think jenny slade's pretty hot okay like i mean chris evans is like a sex chris evans to me needs to be with like you know fucking like a brianna like sex bomb you know that's how hot he is. He might be with Lily James now. Who's Lily James? I think she's hot, right? Yeah, she was in Baby Driver. Her name's hot.

That's a great, that sounds like a porn star. Lily James? Lily Carter? Lily James. You can throw me a name. I bet I can name a porn star with that name. I mean, she's, yeah, but I don't really recognize her like off the bat,

but she's kind of got a little bit of like a Keira Knightley. She looks like a Keira Knightley mashup with someone else. I don't know. Oh, I know her. Yeah, I like her.

Yeah, I mean. I find her. Satisfactory. Yeah, she's visually appealing. Yeah, like literally, if things don't work out with Chris and you want to come hang out with me, I would acquiesce.

Are you from my hometown? Yeah. But what a leak. What a dick pic. What a meme. I actually am surprised. I thought it should have gotten more attention. Yeah, well, it was NFL Sunday.

It was Saturday. It was Saturday, wasn't it? You're right. I feel like Chris Evans' penis did not get the attention it deserved. And maybe I'm wrong. No, no, but I agree. But I do think a lot of that was a misguided out of respect. I find that silly.

I get it. But you know what? I even did hesitate. I was like, one day this is going to happen. Sooner or later, and I'm not going to have a tasteful one. I'll probably have the one you described. And it's not going to be as good looking as his. And it's going to be bad.'s not going to be as good looking as his and it's gonna be bad it's gonna be bad folks and when that happens i want people to have some

respect and not talk about it so i was like should i not talk about this because like karma but then i was like but it's awesome so in that case i feel like i would if it if it is definitively going to happen yeah like i'm telling you,000% at some point someone is going to post my penis or my sex or something. It has to. It's just a numbers game. It's going to be horribly embarrassing. But we're going to have to talk about it. Let's make a pact if that happens that we just go on that vacation we talked about to the Bahamas or whatever.

We just go dark for a month. No. I'm going to lean into it. Yeah've talked about like the Bahamas or whatever. Like we just go dark for like a month. No, no, I'm going to lean into it. Yeah. I'm going to be like, yeah, I mean,

it's going to be funny. It's going to be funny. Yeah. I would hope mine, mine, nothing ever with me is funny. Everything always reverts back to like, I'm deplorable for some reason,

you know, it's like, Oh my God, you have kids. You have it. You have kids. What are you doing? Have a hard day.

And I was like, what the fuck? How do you think I got those kids, motherfucker? I'm no longer allowed to have kids. What are you doing? Have a hard day. And I was like, how do you think I got those kids, motherfucker? I'm no longer allowed to have sex because I fucking procreated. But it's going to be horrific. I actually said, I feel like if I had to grade my sexting game,

I think I send rather tasteful nudes. Yes. Yeah. Nothing about me is tasteful. That's where I will agree with the haters when this inevitably happens. I'm deplorable. I'm deplorable. I don't have, see, nothing about me is tasteful. That's where I will agree with the haters when this inevitably happens. I'm deplorable. I'm deplorable.

I don't have, like, there's nothing like jerking off or anything like that. It's just like, no me fucking getting Greg Maddox with a cum shot. I have, like, it's pretty much just like either hard dicks or chubbed up dicks, and it's just pretty basic. What a pussy you are. What are you, some sort of F word? Give me a break. I got that one video with my nut shoved up my ass, but that's it.

It's all for me top to bottom, whether it's words, pictures, behavior, whatever, it's all not great. When it happens, I told you so. Don't be like laughing at me because like i'm telling you now you know i'm telling you okay i hate the cloud i fucking hate the cloud i told you the other day i'm considering going to android yeah i'm i'm so done with the cloud that i'm considering having green bubbles that's how like hectic my life has gotten with the cloud i i think you should do no i think i i would like your dick pics out there

that makes one of us that makes one of us let's get into our top fives we got what do we got for interviews today uh we have dr phil we ha dr interviews today? We have Dr. Phil. Dr. Phil. We should have talked about it with him. Doc, how do I handle horrendous public embarrassment again? So we got Dr. Phil today who went through some of our M of the assholes, and we threw out some quote-unquote hypothetical situations at him,

and I had a good comment. He addresses his thoughts on ellen so a really good interview with our boy phil it's funny to just call him phil instead of phil i was like phil phil at one point it felt wildly yeah very strange right i should call him philip or something um so we got that we'll do our top fives and our interviews all right we got top fives and voicemails all right but before we get into any of that, we got to talk about the new, the big hubba-baloo on Netflix. New movie out, and it's making waves in the world. It's brought to you by Proactiv.

I feel bad if you got acne. I never really, although I will say this. This is gross, but I don't know if you can really see it. But right here, right on the edge of my nose, I got one of those pimples that makes you feel like it's like someone punched you in the face. I feel like I got like a broken nose right now because I got one of those pimples that hurts. That's not quite the same as acne that's embarrassing and it's like all over your face and body.

That I never thankfully really experienced because, God, especially at the age. How cruel is the world that, like, when you're at your most vulnerable and people are bullying and making fun of you is also when your body is going to look gross? Maybe that's why it all unfolds that way. But acne, man, it's a motherfucker, and it's not just for kids. It can happen for 18 to 34. There are plenty of people in the adult world who are suffering from acne,

and that's what Proactiv is. It's the number one brand to help fight adult acne. And, I mean, me, I would do it all. I would spend – if I only had enough money to eat and get Proactiv, and I had pimples, I would get Proactiv. That is worth changing your whole – everything for. That will change your life if you fix the problem there was a time when fucking the medicine the the the side effects of the medicine to fix your face were suicide yeah and we were like okay i'll give it a shot yeah other other

it's worth the risk other uh medicines would like literally drive your brain like fucking insane and here's one that's safe and tested and proven to work and honestly you know you know this this here talks about like all the stresses in life and like how you don't want acne to just be one of them it's like i know i mean when people are like you know there are like starving children so no this is more important this is worse this is worse this is ruining my everyday life and like yeah sure you might think there are bigger problems in this world but honestly when you wake up every day and what you see on your face makes you upset and you don't like it i mean that stop everything and do whatever you got to do to fix that and that's where proactive is proactive comes to the rescue and uh you know acne can pop up out

of nowhere real quick before and it's always like right before a presentation or a date or like whenever that pimples i mean i guess it makes sense right stress reduced right so it's not just chance but it does feel that way like of course right now and uh proactive can can stop all those breakouts for whatever reason they've got you covered um they've got the three different systems to help your skin type they have have one, the Proactive Solution, which is the original system that's good for all skin types, all ages. The Proactive Plus, which is for sensitive skin types. And then the Proactive MD, which is prescription strength for the stubborn breakouts,

like where you need to bring in the heavy guns. So right now, whether you're signing up for one or all three of those, go to proactive.com slash KFC Radio, and you can get an exclusive offer only available to the KFC Radio listeners. You'll get the free hydrating duo gift. That includes a hydrogel mask and a green tea moisturizer. I love those things. Hydrogel, whatever.

Sure. Green tea. Let's go. Eucalyptus and shit. Sign me up. Aloe. What's the black? Char Sure. And green tea. Let's go. Eucalyptus and shit. Sign me up. Aloe. What's the black charcoal? All of it.

Sign me up for all of it, man. Menthol. It smells good. You get the tingle going on your face. Oh, baby. So they have the masks and the lotions and the creams and the ointments and everything to help clear that skin up. Go to proactive.com slash KFC radio. Get the two free gifts plus free shipping.

Take advantage of that offer now and get your clear skin. The new movie Making Waves is called Cuties, a.k.a. What was it, Nick? Mignon. Mignon. Mignon. What? That's how you say it in French.

Say Cuties in French. Mignon. Why do you know that? Because I looked it up today and I was doing my video and I actually found a very funny... Let me see if I can still pull it up on... I went to YouTube to do one of those pronunciation videos and it was this very funny... I've got to find it now because I started it. God damn it.

Hang on. How is it not in my... Sorry, this will be worth it. And I found this like French YouTube pronunciation video. Listen how dumb this idiot sounds. Of course, there's an ad now. God, it's really not that funny. Now this is build up too much much this wasn't there the first time

hey everyone thanks for choosing this videos in this video i'm going to tell you how pronounced this word so let's get right to the Mignon. I don't know if I should trust that's how you're supposed to pronounce it. Hey everyone, let's get to videos. This is Pronounce It. Here we go, dude. Mignon, there's no chance. I hit it with a little Mignon. It sounds like filet mignon, you know?

Mignon, I guess mignon is like a small, like a young bull, or a young bull, I don't know. Mignon! I took French, like it's Mignon. Mignon mignon yeah this was like mignon so this is a french movie which i think does count for something because the french yeah oh first of all okay let me explain what's going on it's called cuties it's a french movie it's a dot it's not a documentary it's a fucking movie which i think a lot of people did not get that at first i think because we're in like documentary culture and because it also seems so crazy to write a script about little children that it just wouldn't happen this is a scripted ass fictional movie about a young girl named amy not amy amy and she is in a muslim family that's

very strict and she finds out that her father is betraying her mother and so she rebels and she rebels how is her father betraying her mother. And so she rebels. And she rebels. How is her father betraying her mother? Listen to this. Have you watched this movie? No, but I read up on it. And so there's this room in their apartment that's sealed off. And they tell this little girl. She's 11 years old.

Don't ever go in that room. And the father goes away for a while to Paris. Or they're coming back to. Yeah, they're in Paris. And I think by accident they said she accidentally stumbles upon this so i don't know whether she opens the door up or whatever she finds out that her dad is on vacation to go get a second bride and bring her back and that's the bridal chamber where he's gonna like consummate with her so it's like fucked. It's fucked. And so she lashes out and rebels and joins up.

That's not a good, very like smart way to betray somebody by having a second room in the house dedicated to them. Yeah. Your wife's probably going to ask some questions about that. Not going to get away with this one, dude. But she, so she joins up with like the popular girls at school who are dancers and this girl is like so sheltered and oppressed and repressed that she's like you know classic like you lock her in the basement then she goes wild they form a twerk team and then they join a dance competition where they're dancing like uh you know you see adults dance today what's happening is i watched

one clip and it looked like they were doing the WAP dance. Yes, exactly that. And when you read the Netflix description, it says, like, Amy is a repressed girl who comes into her own after finding a free spirit dance club. So it sounds like it's a positive thing.

And then what I'm reading is like, no, no, no, no. This is a commentary about how fucked up the world is that girls are sexualized and that they're forced into like to behave like this. And it's actually condemning it. So I'm like, OK, I get it. The right.

This, of course, is all politicized. The left is saying the right is fear mongering and making it something it's not. The right is doing things like Photoshopping on IMDb. It says that there's like bare breasts and nudity. That's not true The right is doing things like photoshopping on IMDb. It says that there's bare breasts and nudity. That's not true. So both sides are being assholes. I saw that. Yeah, that's not true.

There's no full-blown nudity. But the scenes I watched, they're enclosed. How many scenes are there? If there are just two dance scenes in a whole movie? I saw two dance scenes, and then I've heard the finale is supposed to be crazy. But I think the whole movie is pretty tough. And they do things like so I saw dance scenes. I saw I read that there was a movie.

There was a scene where they like force the girl like hazing her. They force her to go into the boys bathroom and take pictures of like the boys dicks. And that there's another picture. There's a scene where they're like taking like they're taking nudes of themselves. Is the person who wrote this movie ever been in the bathroom before we're not all just walking around with our dicks out like you're like you're like you're peeing at the urinal like standing miles away yeah i mean the whole thing does sound like i mean but i guess the the response is like this is what it's like you know you can be a 12 year old girl and like you are thrust into the

world of like sex and sexting and nudity and all that shit which is like maybe that's all well and true i'm just saying i don't want to watch this movie i watch it can be i watch one clip it made me i need to shower i said i don't want to watch anything where it might even be construed that i am uh condoning like kiddie porn the big big criticism is like, okay, fine. You are trying to give a commentary on child exploitation and like sexualization of children. By exploiting. Yeah.

Which makes perfect sense to me. But then the argument is also like, yeah, man, it's a tough fucking topic to talk about. It's like I'm going to make a movie about racism and there's going to be the N word and there's going to be lynching and there's going to be shit that's uncomfortable because I'm trying to like discuss it. But the problem is you're doing it with children. I don't know how that gets. I don't know how the parents agree to that. I don't know how like if I was a cameraman on these scenes, we like zooming in. That was my biggest problem.

If it's like a one shot, like still camera in the back of an auditorium as they're doing overly sexualized dances. That's one thing. This is like, they're up in the mix. They're zooming in on like body parts and crevices and shit. I was like it takes a lot for me to like really, I was like jarring. I was like, this is not I had like a visceral reaction to it.

I could never imagine sitting through that movie and then coming out of it being like, what a what a, I mean some of the critics are like, a wonderful debut from the woman who created it. Like this will be up for awards and da-da-da-da. I'm like even if you really – You said 87 percent? 87 percent critics and 3 percent audience. See, I also think that's bullshit.

I think to give a review of a movie, they should have a quiz first to prove you watched it. Yeah, that's true. People are just fucking bombing this movie because they don't like quiz first to prove you watched it. Yeah, that's true. People are just fucking bombing this movie because they don't like it. Oh, yeah, yeah. I mean, if you look at like the reviews,

it's all politicized now. It's all, I mean, there's two things going on. There's like the movie community being like, no, no, no, this is fantastic. And then you have

the politicized people being like, you know, this is fear mongering and you're just doing this for the election. You know, it's like that. It's like, what? What are we talking about?

All I know is I guess on this in this time, I like I go down the middle. Sometimes I lean left. Sometimes I lean right. Right now, I think I'm leaning a little right. Being like this is too much. Yeah, well, too much for me. I don't like it. But I but it's like front and center on Netflix trending like top 10 on that list.

And there's no plans to take it down. And I don't know if I would have done that. Netflix is going to release some statement as the most watched movie of all time. Definitely. 200 billion streams. The other thing is, from the 10 minutes I saw, it's just not a good movie.

Really? Well, I never... I mean, children actors are hard, you know? You've got to be a really good actor as a kid. I think there are two. Millie Bobby Brown and then... Saw her recently? Jesus Christ. Speaking of fucking... fucking i'm like can't look at that can't look at that she looks like a full-grown woman now how old how old is she now in my mind she's still like

12 i would guess she's 15 holy shit i don't know the answer that drake was talking to her way too early way too long way too early i i I will defend that a little bit. Because I do think there's such aliens, celebrities, where no one can relate to me. And Drake, you were a child actor. You can kind of... I have no problem. You can't personally text.

You really can't. You could be totally harmless, but I don't think you can text a 15-year-old or a 12-year-old or whatever the fuck she was. If you met her on set of a commercial and you were having a private conversation about like hey let me like just give you some of the pitfalls of child acting i think that's cool to like personally contact yeah i mean it's weird for sure but i just think that stuff's like all so weird i mean i also if

you ask me if i think drake is like creepy i don't think he is i just think he's doing something that he's not realizing he comes across as creepy. Jacob, what's his name? Yeah, I know. The kid from Maroon. He's a cute, funny kid, too. He's in the award shows off-camera. Jacob Tremblay? Yeah.

Is your boyfriend, girlfriend, is he young? Timmy Chalamet? I would guess he's mid-20s. I thought he was a young kid. I don't know the answer to that. Beautiful young man. Just a pretty boy. So, you know.

24. Viewer beware if you want to go watch Cuties. I mean, even the name, right? Cuties is insane. It's an insane thing to call it. Cuties. And they're, like, in, like, sequined sparkly dresses and dancing. And I'll say

this the difference is like i said you can make uh movies about violence and about race and horrible tough topics and you want to tackle it authentically and you want it to be jarring and all that shit fine because then you have you have adults who are signing on yeah so right an adult with a full brain i get it, yes. I understand, I will participate. This is like kids who are trying to, they're like, all right, I just want to be in a Netflix movie,

or whatever, you know, and I'll do it. And the parents are probably like, pimping them out. Yes. And then also, no matter what your intended consequences are, the unintended consequences

are that there are pedophiles at home jerking off to that. You know why it's top 10 on Netflixflix all of the pedophiles in the world are watching that and if you can if you're okay with that i could make the most like moving piece of of content that's like wow this shed light on that i could fix the problem if they said you know what no more beauty pageants, no more teen dancing. If my movie fixed all those issues, but I knew that like at home,

pedophiles were like jerking off to it. I'm not making that movie. It's gross. Yeah. So even if you do it, even if you have the right, you know, your heart and your mind's in the right place. Other people's are not.

So the Jared Fogel's of the world and Jeffrey Epstein of the world, they're like, this is my favorite movie ever. Have you guys seen it? What a film. Fucking assholes. Alright, top five. It's brought to you by Bird Dogs.

You know, at this point I feel like the world has just moved completely towards the comfort and functionality style Venn diagram and Bird Dogs does it better than anyone else. I was wearing a pair of bird dogs last night. Shorts to the pants.

So they moved from the shorts to the pants game, which I think is important because the shorts are comfortable. But we've said many times, I feel a bit foolish wearing shorts at times. I still think that and for some reason this summer I've just I've noticed that. You've just said fuck it and you're wearing them. But you know what? I've seen your just gross, creamy

white legs all summer. It hasn't been great. But yeah, if you want to wear, you know, shorts are good for the summer, but, you know, sometimes they're a little bit informal or sometimes you're like Frankie Borelli and you have weird, like girly translucent legs. You don't want to wear them. I don't have great legs either.

It's like we were talking about with Chris Evans. Like you don't want your legs on display. But so now they got into the pants game. They're still comfortable. They basically just like stole Lululemon's head designer. And I don't know with bird dogs if that's a joke or not. your legs on display but uh so now they got into the pants game they're still comfortable they basically just like stole lululemon's head designer and i don't know with bird dogs if that's a joke or not they like to have a little bit of fun at bird dogs there's a chance they might have literally sold that person you think so i don't know they're comfortable ass fucking

pants i would like throw a burlap sack over his head throw him in a fucking you mean like actually kidnapped yep kidnapped poached him away like maybe poached him away like you know his contract was up a little lemon when they signed him or maybe they threw him in the back of a van with a burlap sack and said design those fucking pants but either way they're as comfortable as the shorts are but now with a little more formal look they are the comfiest best looking pair of pants you'll ever wear they've got the underwear built into it uh which is the future it's just one less step to worry about it's one less thing to wash like there's nothing worse than when i run out of underwear i mean you just wear like women's underwear when you're when you're out but when i have like when i wear like when i wear this

uncomfortable i'll never run out of underwear i feel like i have a lot but then i i always turn around i'm like well i'm down to like that that pair that doesn't fit me that well whatever 50 pairs of underwear it's like what well what i like about these i was like whatever pair of pants you have that's how 50 pairs of underwear. It's like, well, what I like about these, though, is, like, whatever pair of pants you have, that's how many pairs of underwear you have because they're connected. So they're comfortable, and they're stylish. You can wear them, you know, in or out. You can wear them to the bar.

You can wear them to work, whatever. It's got the stretch. It's got the comfy material, the look, the fit. All of it's perfect. So go to birddogs.com, enter promo code KFC, and you'll get a free pair of nunchucks, which I like. I think that's a great promotion. You know, free shipping, sure, whatever.

Those little gimmicks are cool. Give me the nunchucks gimmick. That one I like. Nunchucks are something where you... I mean, I sat there flipping around like Bruce Lee the whole time. You never think to buy them, but when there are nunchucks lying around like they're out in the office... If there's a pair of nunchucks in front of you and you don't grab them and try to do the Bruce Lee thing where you grab it with your elbow, I don't like you. You're a fucking loser.

I don't want to know you as a person. So get your nunchucks. I've never seen anyone use nunchucks to, like, kill someone, which you could big time. Well, also, let's be clear. These are foam. These are. Yes, they're fun nunchucks. But also, let me be clear to you.

The copy from bird dogs says you'll get an actual murder weapon so they're not exactly all right so yeah they're not exactly uh upset about the disclaimer but you are right they are they're the playful ones uh but like i've never seen someone just be like like i want to go on live leak this sounds bad but i want to go on live leak and like, like, Google, like, nunchuck. Someone's head just gets split open. You would crush somebody with those. I've only seen the foam ones.

They're a lot of fun. Those and Chinese throwing stars, ninja throwing stars. That should be the next. Some kid used to lay in his bed, and he left his door open, and he would just throw them and then stick them into the wall. I'm like, bro, one day someone's going to come walking by. You're not checking. Oh, like through the doorway? Yeah. Holy shit!

Maybe that's why he was doing it. He's like, one day someone's going to come by. And I could be like, oh! Lodged in someone's temple. Holy shit. Insane. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. He was an insane person. I don't know what he's up to in his life right now, but he was an insane person. He's probably in jail or murdering people. Anyway, birddogs.com

promo code KFC get yourself a pair of the Bird Dog shorts or the Bird Dog pants, all their clothes, and you get the free pair of nunchucks. That's KFC when you check out at birddogs.com Top 5. We just read an article today that said Jeopardy is returning to production, which is a big

deal because A, Jeopardy is fire, and B, Alex Trebek, God bless him, is still doing the damn thing. He's still, unfortunately, battling cancer. He's still battling cancer? Well, I think he's going to be battling it from here on out. I don't know if it's – I don't know. I don't think it's going away. But he is – so he's got to be protected because, obviously,

that's like immunocompromised and we got coronavirus. So they said they're taking every single precaution possible to make sure they protect Alex at all costs. So we figured today we'll do a little top five game shows of all time. Who's first pick? You can go first. Jeopardy. Okay. Second pick. You can go first. Jeopardy. Okay. Second pick. I mean, Jeopardy, it's, you know, there's a reason why that article sparked this idea.

Trebek is the man. Trebek, I mean, just the fact that you know, like, just the SNL skit alone. It's like the fact that someone was like, this is a good enough dynamic here, and he's a good enough character, and then, like, mix it in with Sean Connery. It's just perfect. And to me, it's the king quiz show. here and he's a good enough character and then mix it in with Sean Connery. It's just perfect. And to me, it's the king quiz show. Is that pretty still a thing?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want to say that Colin Quinn has been on it and killed it. There's a couple people out there. You know who's good at it? Pat Sajak. He did a crossover and he crushed it. I'm pretty sure he ran away with it. He's a smart cat.

But there's a few people out there who are very smart celebrities who have done it. Give me a little quick Google on that, Nick, if you can just find best Celebrity Jeopardy contestants. But to me, it's the premier, I guess not intelligence show. What's that called? A quiz show or an aptitude or whatever. It's more, you know, it's,

it's more just like knowledge and memorization and recall and stuff. But you know, put it this way. Can you name one other person who's ever been on a game show? And I can name you Ken Jennings, Brad Rudder, you know what I mean? Uh,

James Holtzauer. Like I, you know, like these guys are like athletes on Jeopardy. Yeah. I can't tell you like, you remember the appearance of like Todd Jones on, you know, X, Y,oltzauer. Like, you know, like, these guys are like athletes on Jeopardy. Yeah, that's true. I can't tell you. Like, do you remember the appearance of, like, Todd Jones on, you know, XYZ, whatever?

Like, so it's a cut above for a fucking reason. So Jeopardy, number one. And Alex. Legends of the Hidden Temple. Wow. I wasn't even thinking. Yeah, now I got to go deep in my bag to think about, like, kids games. Well, all mine are going to be.

Yeah, yeah. Because I. All right, I'll leave them alone so you can have them. I have i'm not i'm not a big game show guy yeah i i i obviously like i'm not anti-game show but just uh i'd rather watch new girl for the 17th time yeah i mean i used to i don't do as much anymore but during non during the baseball off season like seven o'clock for me was just like Jeopardy time. Did he used to live tweet Jeopardy? Maybe.

Maybe. I feel like he did. Maybe. If there was a champion on a run, I wouldn't just pick a random day, but if there was a 10-day champion, yeah, I mean, Action Jackson, Arthur Chu, I had a fucking feud with that Asian guy

who told me he was going to fuck my mom. Yeah. I've got a deep rooted history. I've since kind of passed the torch to Clem on the blog front. But yeah, I mean, Barstool Jeopardy, I feel like I did kind of pave that way. Now Tommy's

doing literal Barstool Jeopardy. But yeah, maybe. Legends of the Hidden Temple, that ledges of the hidden temple. Uh, that's one that's pretty legendary. Like you can pay, everyone can still tell you silver snakes and like blue wheels or whatever.

But the final challenge, blue monkeys, blue monkeys. Yeah. The temple run. It's almost, I mean, it's weird.

It was like, we're just going to have these like giant black men scared. These children feels like the beginning of a weird porn. I was like, I'm going to fuck you. It's like man. Dingo popping out of this thing. It feels like the beginning of a weird porn. It's like, ah, I'm going to fuck you! It's like Mandingo popping out of this thing. And also, you have to get 35 pieces of this medallion in 10 seconds. Oh, it was impossible.

Anyone who completed that is now LeBron James. He's the only person who ever finished that. Right, right, right. The athletic skill required to complete the Temple Run is... It's impossible. It's literally... It's absolutely impossible. It's time-wise impossible.

Yeah. It was like, you need to do 35 things in 25 seconds. It's like, well, unless I can do them at light speed, it's not going to fucking happen. Good pick, though. Good pick. I will go Price is Right. Price is Right.

The official, as cliche as it is, stay home from school game show. The wheel, the big block dice, the golf, the yodeler. I mean, that's one. Loud Sean was on it. Aaron Paul was on it. I forgot Loud Sean was on it. Oh, yeah. I think he won a prize, too.

The showcase showdown. Bob Barker, the skinny mic. Bob barker the skinny mike bob barker's beauties a new a new car come on down i mean all these phrases and all these things are from uh from price is right so i think it's kind of become i always i gotta like remind myself that like there's always a new like generation or a new like crop of young people reading the blog and listening to podcasts and stuff. I feel like cliche and hacky when I talk about prices right now. It's like, yeah, we've done it.

Like, Dane Cook had his bit about it. And, you know, yeah, when you stay home from school, you watch it. But there's probably some people out there hearing it for the first time that it's still the GOAT. I mean, even with Drew Carey, I feel like those jokes still play and those observations still hit home for people. Drew Carey getting that was one of the more tumultuous times, I feel like those jokes still play and those observations still hit home for people. Drew Carey getting that was one of the more tumultuous times, I feel like, in American history.

You're giving it to Drew Carey? I'm sure he does a fine job. Yeah, but people are talking about who's the successor for Alex Trebek, and it's a big discussion. And Bob Barker was this playboy and this cool cat, and they were like, that fat guy from Cleveland? Oh, wait, he got skinny now? Like, what?

And it's like totally fine. But you do want to, you know, it's like you'd rather it be, oh, shit, like good choice. Yeah. But also, I don't think it's possible. Yeah, it's very hard. But, you know, I would say like, I remember like when the Yankees were trying to replace Derek Jeter, I was like, don't even bother. You know, but Didi Guerrero's filled in and hit 25 home runs. Everyone was like, we like this guy too.

It can happen, but it takes a miracle. Yeah, you always want to be the guy after the guy. Yes. Right, right. Let these people fail, and then I'll take it. You're up. American Gladiators. Great pick.

Yeah. Great pick. That tennis ball game was as iconic as Temple. Oh, the assault. I mean, that... Great pitch. That tennis ball game was as iconic as Temple. Oh, the assault. Assault, yes. Assault. You were shooting

tennis balls 120 miles an hour out of a cannon. I mean, that is insane. Were they really a buck 20? Yeah. Maybe they juiced it up a little bit, but it was definitely over 100.

Like, that's what they were telling us. 100 miles an hour. Yo, that would, like... That would hurt. That would hurt. And, like, people get hit and they just put on a front because they were on TV, but, hour yo that would like that would hurt that would hurt and like people get hurt hitting it and you know they just put on a front because they're on tv but like i would be like bro i don't even like i i don't know how fast my friends threw when we were in

fifth grade but i hated like in uh what was it called running bases uh like we called it butts up that's a big big big thing butts up that's what we called called it butts up. That's a big, big, big thing. Butts up? That's what we called it. Why? Butts up, red ass. Some people called it wall ball. Some people called it off the wall.

I think we were just wall ball. Yeah. But it was like. Yeah, we got pegged like that. Whatever they were throwing at that age, that fucking hurt. Yep. And I'm going to guess it was around in the 40s they were throwing. Right.

Right. And that, my favorite thing was like the the other mission that the guns that the contestants got like the first one's like a fucking rocket launcher the one you shoot the big ball out of the cannon and then by the end you're like you're in between like these little twigs and you're supposed to like fire you know and then you just get rocked rocked i can't even and then like even the other games at least that one kind of gave you a chance to give you weapons and stuff i loved when it was like run past this fucking roided up 80s, like barely missed the NFL freak show. I actually, the girls scared me more than the guys.

The girls were. There was that one deaf girl. I think her name was Ice, something like that. She was deaf and she was just. I was like, I'll take Malibu. I'll go fight that guy over there. Shit. All right. I will go. that guy over there. Shit. All right.

I will go. I'm looking at a list here. Because once you opened up the children's, you know. I'm going to go Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. Oh, another good one. Regis. And I maintain to this day that the dude who won a million dollars and called his dad was a setup and a hoax and that we were just, as a society,

we were not woke enough to fake stuff like that. I think nowadays, if that happened, we'd be like, that was so fucking fake. Coming back, by the way. Oh, yeah? With who? Jane Lynch. Okay. I mean, there's been a few.

I know Meredith Vieira did it. I think Jimmy Kimmel did it recently. Shout out to our girl Nikki Glaser. She was a contestant on the show. I mean, that revived game shows in my mind. I agree with that. It was a pre, what's it called? Primetime show, and it was must watch.

And it would end, and it would carry over to the same contestant. So it'd be like, oh, we got to see where that guy finishes. The 32,000, 64,000, 125,000 $250,000, where you could lock in money. I mean, phone a friend. Lifelines are like, that was revolutionary. But yeah, that guy calling his dad. Hey, Dad, I just want to let you know I'm going to win the million.

I wish his dad was like, actually, it's going to get taxed at 50% rate. Yeah, it is funny that all of these games, it's like, you don't win that much money. Dude, I actually have always flabbergasted how little Jeopardy wins. Jeopardy is like, you have to be the smartest person alive, and you walk home with $12,000.

And then, well, we'll talk about other game shows based on who picks here, but other game shows that are much easier, or people walk away with 10 times the money. Guts. Fuck. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good choice that's that's i mean that's it this the gut guts is what you got the agro crag for right oh yeah yeah global gut specifically uh

was when they started going with like the like different countries and they had moe yeah and mike michael malley and the agro crag and uh uh that like they used to have that bungee cord thing where you would jump and like bounce and bounce again everyone thinks about the agro category but all those all those games were fucking sick there was the one thing where you're on a raft and you had to like pull yourself on a rope that was like so fucking hard for like an eight-year-old yeah i remember that they're in a pool or something yeah yeah the pool was on a raft in water and it was like uh this is hard uh but shout out to brian beer the second our first ever kfc radio guest who was a was he the first guest?

I think so. I mean, who else would it have been? I think Cutler was before. Was he? I think so. Brian Beer, who is now like a fucking raging political monster on social media. Yeah, we owe you a big time. I mean, are you that surprised?

He's a big MAGA guy. Remember he sent us all all grapefruits? Yes. Or oranges and shit? Oranges. So yeah, that was OG guest because Big Cat saw him. He dominated his entire round of Global Guts. Great choice.

I'm going to go Supermarket Sweep. One of the more preposterous game shows of all time. People running around the supermarket. It is 80s and like early 90s i guess entertainment at its purest that's on netflix now it just like this past month is now available on netflix so if you're a youngin and you weren't around for supermarket sweep just go watch a couple episodes i'm not it's it's weird to like binge watch a game show for the 80s but watch a couple because people just flying around the aisles with their cart out, grabbing food.

That was like, I would pretend I was in supermarkets. Yes. Oh, absolutely. In the supermarket, you're like taking a turn. And it's like, every game show is kind of like a variation of a quiz show. You sit down, I ask you a question, you answer it. This is like one of a fucking kind. Running around a

goddamn grocery store. So shout out Supermarket Sweep. Double dare. Man, you're like one step ahead of me fucking kind. Running around a goddamn grocery store. So shout out Supermarket Sweep. Double Dare. Man, you're like one step ahead of me every time. That nose is so iconic. Yes, that giant nose. As a kid, I was like, I felt seen. That is the final word, for sure.

Taking those fucking flags out of there. Oh, God, it's gross. But there was a lot of great shit on there. Even just all of those fill up the cylinder with the line. You're like dumping your head into the airhead, all that shit. Because then there was Family Double Dare where you did it with like your mom and dad, which had to be fucking weird. All right.

I mean. Man, there's so many good ones. And I will have to say, just like, hang on, let me just scroll through here. Oh. I'm going to have to go with. I see Locke was good. There's some really good ones. Hang on, hang on.

Man, this is a huge toss-up for me. There's three in my mind right now. There's one that I like personally. There's one that deserves to be this like kind of pantheon here um i will go with i'll go with family feud oh family feud that wasn't the one i like personally liked the most but i think family feud first of all with the curse of all of its hosts.

Do you know that? All of its hosts committed suicide. What? It's crazy. All the hosts of Family Feud for a pretty long time. I think it's like three, but that's a lot. Family Feud curse. Family Feud, Steve Harvey actually kind of ruined it for me. So it's kind of become like a fucking stand-up comedy hour for Steve Harvey.

I think they try to force those funny moments. Yeah, it'd be like, oh, we asked 100 people. Items to put in your ass. Yeah, like what makes a man a man? Penis? You said a penis? But prior to like if you go back to like the 70s

it was like the host would lean in and be like what's up doll, what's your name? Hold hands. 100 people surveyed like when you're getting intimate with your husband what are you? It was so hyper sexualized.

The one host kissed every woman on the lips. Really? your husband like what are you did it it was like so hyper sexualized the one code the one um host kissed every woman on the lips really every single girl kissed right on the fucking lips but yeah like a sensual one uh but yeah richard daw Richard Dawson killed himself. Ray Combs killed himself. Louis Anderson, he did not kill himself, but he got arrested for like, you know, he got caught up in some like illegal shit. Then they had Al Borland from Home Improvement. He was all good. Nothing happened.

But yeah, they had a dark run, but good answer, the fast, the buzz in thing, and the final round where you have two people from your family go, that's one of the best final rounds in all of Family Feud. I love when somebody gets...

A great Always Sunny episode as well. Awesome! I love when people get 179 points and the second person just needs to get like 15 or whatever and they can't do it. Oh, I love it. So yeah, that rounds out my top five. Does Room Raiders count? Sure. Room Raiders.

Fuck it. Anytime you can get a call, come on. You're kind of participating in a game of sorts. Definitely. I think there's like a prize. You could win money. You lose and win. So that's a game show. Yeah. Room Raiders. That was probably the last time I a game of sorts. Yeah, definitely. I think there's like a prize. You could win money. You lose and win. So that's a game show.

Yeah. Room Raider said it. That was probably the last time I watched a game show. Yeah. Regularly. I'll catch an occasional Jeopardy episode here and there. I was down to, my personal favorite is Pyramid, which I've tried to like wedge into this show and live shows many times before.

And then, I mean, Wheel of Fortune is not on that list. We don't have Wheel of Fortune. Oh, wow. Because, fuck Pat Sajak. and then I mean Wheel of Fortune is not on that list oh wow because fuck Pat Sajak fuck Pat Sajak that god damn phony yeah I'm talking to you Pat you couldn't hold a fucking candle you can't hold Alex Trebek's jock strap

you sit there and you just say whether it's a fucking letter you say yes or no that's it Fanta does all the fucking work for you is there an actual feud between them? Or is it just kind of... No, it's just me in my head. That little bitch, Sajak.

Fuck you. You'd be a real man like Trebek, you fucking pussy. 7 o'clock. 7 o'clock, Jeopardy for life. None of that fucking 7.30 Jeopardy that you guys get up in New England. 7 o'clock, Trebek. Fuck 7.30 Wheel of Fortune. Fuck Sajak.

But then Wes, it's on at 4. Yeah,30, Wheel of Fortune, fuck Sajak. But then, it's on F4. Yeah, well, that's what, so, my grandfather used to, he was a firefighter,

he'd be in the firehouse, and he got, like, one of those channels, I think we got, like, WGN in Chicago, or whatever,

and he would watch Jeopardy, and, like, get the answers, and then go over to the firehouse, and, like, played it right,

where he didn't get all of them right, but he got a lot of them right, and they all just thought he was a fucking genius. Really? Which is equally to memorize some of the answers. I mean, I remember a couple of them, but he was rattling them all off. What a hustler.

What a scam. All right, so let us know. Tweet at us at KFC Radio. Let us know your top five game shows, and let's get into our voicemails. Today's voicemails are brought to you by Manscaped. I got this box over here. Let me grab it real quick.

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And here's an example of all the revival, the crop preserver, the crop revival. I mean, they've got it all. These guys think about your dick and balls more than you do. They think about your dick and balls so much. They probably think about your dick and balls as much as your girl does because she's like, God, it's so terrible down there. And Manscaped's like, we know. I feel like the CEO of Manscaped is a girl who's like, we got to clean this shit up.

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And when you get the perfect package kit, you also get the two free gifts. Their tagline is awesome. From the moose to the caboose we got the job to get the tools done the tools to get the job done from the moose is the moose my penis yeah because it's like a head and you know balls oh i just i just think of moose as large yeah well that i was just gonna say that it's you know more like you know from the mouse to the house in the back. Listen, you want to clean your dick up and make sure you're on point. In the modern world, you got to do it.

You think about all the shit that girls are doing. They're putting all sorts of shit in there. They got to worry about their pH for fuck's sake. Imagine if you had to worry about your pH. I don't think you have to. Sir, you do. I think that's just women putting undue stress upon themselves. Oh, well, maybe you're nicer than I am.

Bro, I've never fucking eaten a pussy and been like, mm, pH balance is a little off here. Yeah, but... Yes, yes, but you... So you, the forever, like, I'm not going to say anything, didn't speak up, but you... But I never... But you noticed.

I never noticed. I've never noticed. You just said it. No, I just said it. I didn't. You didn't. Oh, I definitely have. I think you have, and you just don't know what an unbalanced pussy tastes like.

That could very well be, but I have absolutely never been like. In my mind, it's like if there's a taste. If you're all right and all clean, it's just like. It's a penny. See, I mean, yes, it is, but I feel like if you're getting down. Dude, I never knew. You know what girls need? Summer's Eve. Summer's Eve is a fucking lifesaver, bro. I don't yes, it is, but I feel like if you're getting down. Dude, I never knew. You know what girls eat on Summer's Eve? Summer's Eve is a fucking lifesaver, bro.

I don't know what that is. I mean, I know what it is, but I don't. I've heard the phrase Summer's Eve. Get your pussy right, girl. Dude, I remember the first time I'd never heard that penny thing before. And I remember I was out to eat with Chaps. And he was like, what do you mean? I'm like, does he taste like pennies?

And he was like, he happened to have a penny in his pocket. And I was like, smell this.ussies taste like pennies and he was like he happened to have a penny in his pocket and it's like smell this and i was like oh my god that's a vagina oh it's it's spot on dirty copper dirty copper is what a pussy tastes like but if you could not if you could fix it wouldn't you it's like this it's like you could just roll in there with a bush and fucking you know gross and you'd take care of it yeah it's the same thing so yeah i guess i would but this is as simple as like the hair's gone imagine if i was like well i'm at i don't even know it's like a scale of one to ten like i'm on a six of my ph and i gotta be at a four i don't how do they ever know they don't taste it is there a feeling to it well have you ever cleaned a pool you gotta you gotta worry about your ph bounce in your pool as well i know

that and you take you either have these strips. Old school, nowadays you have a strip. You put it in the water and it turns a color and then you hold it up to the chart and you see. Old school, I remember you used to fill up this little cylinder with pool water and then you put these drops in it and you shake it up and then the color comes out there. But either way, you're looking at this color scale. So women do that? Well, I don't think they do that. So I don't know.

It would be funny if you just took these strips and like put them inside and pull it out. You're like, nope, not balanced. I think they just hopefully just wash, like just fucking do

what you got to do to be like, it's going to be balanced right. I guess everyone I've ever been with has been clean. I don't even think it's necessarily like you're dirty. I mean, I don't know.

It's just like a fucking internal thing. I don't understand it. We know that. We don't know it's just like a fucking internal thing i don't understand it well we know that we don't know we don't know shit about pussy voicemails nick says we got a doozy so i said we die right into that one nick all right can't see you fight super producer bc or nick and jackie first time caller a long time listener. I've got a weird one for you. Definitely don't think you'd handle one like this. I'm 28 years old. I've been married to the girl I've been dating since 14.

So that's 10 more lives spent together. She's the only girl I've ever been with and only girl I ever will be with. I know that sounds really confident. Divorce rates are over 50%. But I can say that confidently because i'm actually gay and she knows i found this out about two years ago 12 years into our relationship and i never hid it from her told her right away and we decided we still want to stay together so we actually got married and had our kid all fully knowing i was gay So we basically established our family as gay men. Anyway, we are now starting to tell friends.

About five of our friends know now. They've all been super accepting and supportive. Obviously, they have questions. It's a very weird situation. Not to pretend that it's not. And ideally, in these years, we would like to have told our entire close friend group, which is about 14 people, 20 if we're counting significant others.

So what I'm curious about is after our friend group knows, how many of our close friends can I expect to try and have sex with my wife? I don't care. I don't care. Anyway. Do you hear that? What did he say? Rewind it. He got too much of a laugh to try and have sex with my wife i don't care we're in an open marriage

fuck whoever you want right that's the kid in the background anyway she said it'd be weird she probably wouldn't do it so it's probably a moot point to be asking i'm just curious how many of them do you think will make a move okay we'll get to the question in a minute we got a lot to unpack here I love this family I think I do too love this family I think

it's incredible I think it's so fucking modern and mature and like adult and I mean shout out to her that's she's the real superstar here you know he found his way and he like and and shout out to him for being like honest about it and just having the courage to speak up but for her to be like you know we can still do what we do here um you want to get gay married in an open relationship let's fucking do it like that i'll fucking marry you right now essentially that's what happened right yeah

found just someone they like appreciate and want to spend their life with. But we haven't fucked. Just not someone they want to fuck. We didn't fuck for many years prior to that. I don't care. I'm just saying there is a difference. There's a difference, but essentially it's the same thing. This is what marriage should be.

I've always said that connecting your your your financial well-being your financial life to your like emotions is crazy it's kind of crazy to attach like your familial unit to your your relationship relationship emotions are so erratic and illogical and like you know for your family and your kids you need like a rock you need like a friendship you know so have your have kids with your friends and fuck other people that's the way families work genius that's brilliant this guy just changed the game i mean like she she think about what was her deal when she when he was like she was probably she was probably like i've been fucking other people for a long time okay i i like his like

like i i i feel like he's not actually gay. He just said that to try and get out of a relationship, and she called him bluff. Yeah. Well, I think I would rather, I know some people wear it as like a scarlet letter, like you turned someone gay or something like that. I'd rather someone dump me because they're gay than dump me because they don't like me. Oh, for sure. Or they don't like me, but they're not attracting, you know, because their body's like rejecting me. because they don't like me oh for sure or they don't like me but they're not attracting you know because their body's like rejecting me penis yeah if it was just like if they're like i have been with you i like dick just not like yours and you and i choose to have you not around that hurts yeah if you just say to me i've i'm just being honest i finally

admitted it to myself and you i don't like your entire gender i'd be like cool cool but i still you know you're still great like you still work hard you're still dedicated you're still admirable you you raise the kid like let's just keep doing this i think it's incredible so how did he fuck her to have the kid or you think it's ivf like i guess like i guess like it's how i mean he was like i've been with one girl and like i think he i think he was fucking her probably not like the frequency of a straight couple. Right. But I don't think it was like that. No, I think they were together 12 years before. So it was like there was plenty of sex being had.

You can't go 12 years into a relationship. I think that kid's his. Isn't it weird we haven't had sex yet? I think it's so. I think it's his. It's definitely his. But just like, did you do it the old-fashioned way? Or did you do it like a little science-y way?

No, I mean, it sounds like this was like after the fact, after the kid, he admitted it. I think it's so crazy to me. Just being in the closet is so. Well, you know, it wasn't after the kid. It was before after the fact, after the kid, he admitted it. I think it's so crazy to me. I just being in the closet. It wasn't after the kid. It was before the kid. Before the kid came out. Yeah.

Oh, OK. Because I was like, why would they do an IVF? Oh, so you're saying after the fact. Oh, then maybe it might maybe it is IVF because like I think once you admit to yourself and come out of the closet, do you think you don't have to keep fucking pussies after that? Do you think you even could? I can understand. Part of me, it blows my mind being in the closet and and and going through that stress blows my mind i my hat goes off to

anybody who did it where you're just like all right i'll just fuck this girl i would never be like i'll just fuck this guy because it's more complicated if i don't i mean i just can't it's not gonna happen like how do you get your dick hard for a pussy if you i mean if you don't like vaginas they are scary you know what i mean i mean if you like vaginas they're scary right so like how to be able to be like but i get it where you're like it's a defense mechanism almost but once you come out and it's out there i don't think you can get hard for the opposite sex anymore ever again i maybe i mean i'm just speculating but to me you'd be like i lived that lie for 12 years 15 years 25 years i can't get it up for pussy anymore i'm sick of warm silky holes i know that's the

other thing too though it's like this objectively feels good on a dick it just does okay yeah it's why you but i guess you can say the jerk off and stuff you could say that about assholes though it's like when you fucking girl on the ass it feels good so a guy could be like objectively this feels good dude but no no no that's true yeah but my balls are slapping yours, so that's a problem, dude. But yeah, it is. It's a funny world. Now, I would say it's probably going to be a difficult conversation to have with your kids one day, but I'm going to have to. Plenty of people have to have weird conversations with their kids.

I don't think you have to tell them. Well, I guess you could just say you're divorced. Huh? You could just say you're divorced. They're not divorced. But like mommy, I mean, I'm assuming they're you're divorced. Huh? You could just say you're divorced. They're not divorced. But like, I'm assuming they're eventually going to be with a man. She's going to go find a man she likes. I don't think so.

Oh, I definitely think so. I think otherwise there's no point to even bring any of this up. I think she's going to go find another man for sure. Oh, I hadn't thought that. You think they're just going to remain celibate? Not celibate. They're in an open marriage. Then fuck other people. Oh, okay, fine. So maybe You think they're just going to remain celibate? I think, not celibate, they're in an open marriage. Then fuck other people.

Oh, okay, fine. So maybe they don't get married again or have, but like when mommy goes out on a date or some shit like that, you just hide that for their entire lives? Yeah, fuck that, dude. I never ask questions. Like, yeah, you going to work? Okay, see you later.

But what about when you're like 25? It's one thing when you're a kid and you can get around that. When you're 25, I don't think you'd notice either. I wouldn't know, like when I was 25. Also, by then you're probably not like fucking, you know, it's like when your parents like 65, it's not like they're like going out on dates,

getting banged out. Right. I think maybe they are. These two have flipped the script. You're just chilling at home watching TV. So you just got someone you like who you watch TV with. Right. That's amazing.

That sounds great. That was my, you know, my biggest problem in marriage was like, I couldn't, you know, we couldn't do that. Right. There's a lot of things,

but like that to me is what, when that's when it gets like overbearing where it's like i can't even like go home like we fight all the time we can't just hang out watch tv we can't have fun together forget about like the rest of it so if you can just continue to do that and you just find the sex elsewhere i'm telling you having sex with your spouse is the worst thing possible it is the most complicated thing ever you just do it with someone else if everybody agreed to do with someone else see because i i remember thinking like i'm unhappy i wouldn't be able to do that though i mean obviously if we're in a gay relationship or if i'm gay it's different but like if if if you were in an open marriage a

heterosexual open marriage i couldn't do that i couldn't spend that because you'd be jealous of yeah them getting fucked yeah yeah for sure yeah i agree i agree but that is a thing that like that is a kind of i think it's i don't want to the word immature is too strong but it's a little bit it's an emotion that like you could get over if you like that is kind of something i think you're kind of like it's an insecurity of yours to be like, yeah, right. It's absolutely insecure. Right.

But I'm saying if you weren't, you could get over that. Like you could do it. It's not something that's like that, like completely unbelievable to be like, I have, I'm going to have sex with this person. That's gonna make me happy.

And you're going to have sex with that person. And like, I'm going to get over my insecurity and we're going to make this work. I don't think I could. No, I, again, I,

and I, and I will not begrudge anybody who could not get over it because that's like the number one thing. You just come home and just get into bed after just having sex with someone else. I would not be thrilled about that. Right. But again, that is something that I do think that's like part of me thinks that's natural and like you're programmed to be like, that's my girl.

But part of me thinks that is a little like society has kind of created that. And if you can navigate that again not for everybody and i don't begrudge anybody who can't but if you can i think you unlock like a higher level of relationship i think it's like the galaxy brain thing it's like i have sex with my spouse it's a normal brain like i have an open relationship i have a gay open relationship i have a gay open relationship with my kid like galaxy these are gonna be the happiest motherfuckers in the world you think so i just think that it's like you get your i think if you if you have sex with someone else again it's i mean it's yeah yes and no because part of me thinks someone's gonna catch feelings someone's

gonna get insecure someone's feelings gonna get hurt if somehow i think that's in a heterosexual i think if it's all if you you're gay, there's no jealousy. That guy can't, if she comes home and she's like, oh my God, this dude just banged me out.

You think he's like, oh word, can I get his number? Like they're just girlfriends about it? Like what was his dick like? Yeah. I think so.

Show me pictures. I don't think he wants to, I don't think he wants for his number or her number, but like I bet like, you can have an actual discussion

about how sex if if it is hetero hetero it gets wildly complicated but i do think if you can you know the same thing just open relationships in general it's just like that ain't for me but there are people who are like i don't value uh monogamy or whatever on the same level you do so i can do this it's not for you but it's for me and they're probably really fucking happy because they just have someone who they i don't think anyone's happy. In an open relationship or just period? Just period.

I agree. I just disagree with people who are like. I just fundamentally don't understand it. I think that we have reached a point where everybody in the world is independent enough and has their own hopes, dreams, career, ambition, ability to achieve all those things. And really, like they call it settling down for a reason because you like settle. You know what I mean? I think on some level everybody just ends up being a little bit resentful of like I could have done this or I should have done that. And I ended up like we're good together, but like you hold me back from this or that thing or whatever.

Just over the course of time, eventually you're going to be like a little resentful of someone, right? I would think so. Over 20, 30, 40 years. So can you ever really... I don't think I've ever resented anybody though. And obviously... Resent is such a weird word. Like usually...

I resent myself. I hate them. I think you resent meaning like there's something about you that you're not doing anything wrong, but let's be honest, like I could have done X, Y, Z or whatever it is that being in this relationship where you have to give up some of yourself, but let's be honest, like I could have done X, Y, Z or what, you know,

whatever it is that being in this like relationship where you, you have to give up some of yourself. You have to be like, I think we have reached a point in the world where everyone's pretty selfish and being in a relationship is selfless. And eventually part of you is going to be like, well, I, you know, I could have been more about me, me, me. And you, you know, if you're a reciprocate, yeah uh but again with this this like gay twist maybe

not it's like you didn't hold me back from shit you know i didn't now but now to his question i don't think this changes we i think we've had this discussion before i think i asked you like if i went gay would you like fuck and you said no i mean i think i think close friends still respect it no matter what. You have some kind of bond. If you go gay, I'm not fucking your wife. What if I was like, I condone it? Or like, you know what?

Then I wouldn't do it either. I'm like, he wants you to. But how about this? You have some sort of love for this girl, clearly. It's the mother of your kid. You have this bond that I think is like one in a trillion. So you could argue that you're like the best relationship ever would i want to know that she's in like good hands or some shit or like with some stranger she met at the club maybe i want you to fuck her my fuck my friend fuck my wife

you know maybe i know that guy he's like clean he's good he's gonna treat her right like it's better him than fucking you know some guy she meets in an alleyway or some fucking great meet on an end there's a happy medium there but yeah it's like all right i met this i met this guy on tinder and fucked him tonight it's like well i don't know john he's in he probably would like buy you dinner too yeah i well i definitely would yeah oh it's all about you you would treat my ex wonderfully man i mean i i think you got some bad friends though if it's just like what you're gay floodgates let's fuck Stacy let's gangbanger he's a fucking

gay let's banger her I mean that's that is some extreme shit right there but man what a story I mean I just love like that's the kid in the back you can tell I mean you can tell from his voice that he's just like there's no

he's not like embarrassed he's not humiliated by it he's totally secure and he's just like yeah here's my story i don't think i would tell my friends i mean i'm sure it took a long time i don't think i just told him right away but i think eventually you have to i think eventually that's a lie that like you just yeah that's true i'd probably get drunk one night one time yeah yeah i was gonna say i think you say that and then you'd get on the podcast like i got a story yeah yeah yeah so it came out to my girlfriend she wants to get married i wonder if uh i would imagine if you if you have kids and and this marriage and everything that it would come as a surprise but i wonder if they're like yeah man like we knew this whole time i feel like i feel like that probably happens like an

out cold when they come out i mean I don't remember it well enough. What a movie. Out Cold, he's like, they're like, I have an announcement. He's not making the announcement. They all think. They're just like, you're gay? Yeah.

He's like, what? Me? Guys, it's actually Roy from The Office. I am now putting that together. Come on. I'm gay? Yeah, right. They're like, yo, we've all known forever.

No one cares. I bet you it's like that. I bet you more often than not, in general, it's like that with people coming out. It's probably like the worst kept secret. I feel like you can usually tell. Yeah. And then with this one, maybe not. It's been years and family and marriage.

But God, I love them. I love for them to just call up all the time and just let us know what's going on in your life. I love it. Because that should be a reality TV show. It really should. I really should. And you know you can come up with a reality TV show. It really should. I really should. And you know you can come up with like a clever name,

like a double entendre about like open marriage and gay and whatever it is. But honestly, I'm gay, my wife doesn't care. It's really gay and proud. I'm proud of it.

We're just doing it. I think that, I mean, I've had, I have thought through every variation of relationships and monogamy and open relationships and marriage and everything just trying to figure out what I did wrong, what I did right, what I should do next, what am I about, what do I want, what do I not want. better in a vacuum in some sort of modern alternative open thing but knowing that it's like

because it's weird from everyone else would be like my problem right like i still have insecurities and i still would be weirded out by things and i still would be nervous that other people would judge because everyone else if everyone did it i'd be down but because it would just be me i'd be like uh i have to explain to people and then they're going to judge me and i still have some insecurities about it because it's not a normal thing that i can talk to with you like if both of us were like man it doesn't suck when like your girlfriend bangs other guys you know but if you bear that by yourself it would it sucks so uh until like basically until the entire rest of the world changes,

I'll just swallow it. Hopefully not literally, but who knows? Who knows? Wow. That one put it in the history books. That's KC radio. And just like the literal like relationship history books. That's the kid in the back.

That's the yeah, that's the fucking kid. That's what I'm talking about. That's my little like gay straight trophy. Whatever. And I tell gay straight trophy. Whatever. I'm going to tell him one day. Wow. Hi, Tansy. I love you.

So me and my friend were just walking around Philly, and we were talking about if you got kidnapped, how much money do you think your friends and family would pay in ransom to get you back? Let me know. Wow. This is going to be a real look in the mirror moment. Not a lot.

That's not true. I'd pay a lot to get you back. I would. Selfishly, because I don't have a show that show. I'd be doing a cost analysis. I'd be like, all right, well, if he's gone, we lose this much money per year. If he's here, all right, it makes more money. It makes more sense to bring him back.

You know, I think my family would pay a decent amount of money to get me back. But I think there would be financial implications. I think they'd be like, you know, he's got like a payday coming. If I didn't have any money coming, I don't think they'd... I don't know. They'd be like, he had a good enough life. I wouldn't want them to pay to get me back. Really?

Because then I'd just feel bad the whole rest of my life. You never want... Who said recently? Was it on radio or here? Someone was like, I always go down on the girl because I pay my debts. I do, but I don't know if I said that. Somebody was like, yeah, I on the girl because i pay my debts uh i don't i do um but i i don't know if i said that somebody was like yeah i'll never like just get a blow job because i don't

want to owe anybody anything i think okay that does sound like me yeah that might be something i want a clean ledger so you come back and your family paid like 750 000 for you to come home it's like i'd be like i gotta live a 750 000 life yeah right i gotta you you your call i disagree with your cost analysis of me. You show up, like, drunk to, like, Thanksgiving and it's like, 750K for this, John?

Yeah. 750K for you to fucking make fun of Nana blacked out at Thanksgiving, you piece of shit? You're a real scumbag, you know that? Yeah, that's...

I think it's just easier letting it go. Honestly, though, but, okay. Being real, your family would pay every dime they have. Probably. And I think my family would too. Yeah. And I think you have a shitty family if they wouldn't. I would pay, you know,

if it fell on me, I would pay probably like all my money to get back like, like right now if Tommy Smokes was kidnapped and they put it on you, wouldn't you do it? Just because it's like well if i don't do it i'm like a fucking asshole it's like i don't really care about if i get tommy

back but i have to like tell the scabelli's like nope yeah yeah it was up to me and i decided no thank you yeah i mean that you can't have that you talk about having you know having uh something on your ledger when you die it's like you walk around with that guilt i just let that a boy die because i just didn't you know i wanted to keep my money it's like johnny bananas when he stole all that money and uh you can steal it but johnny bananas they that's a that's a game show i should put on there honorable mention the challenge nick but it came down to like him and his partner and it's like you can split the money or take it he was like that's fucking mine oh that's right that was him like 250 or like 500 000 from this girl and he

he's like he doesn't lose a wink of sleep but i would walk around every day being like oh no i don't know if i made the right choice but if i had to like i would probably you know for a perfect stranger almost if i got put on the spot and it was publicly known that it's my publicly known yeah but if it's okay so if it's a total stranger and a publicly known, I have to pay all my money. If it's an acquaintance and their family knows, I'm probably still doing it then, too. Yeah.

Dude, imagine if someone did it to you publicly. We're like... Fuck. Fuck. That's a form of ransom in a way. We'll just make him pay them. You know what I mean? We'll just say he's got to do it.

Some fucking terrorist in El Salvador gets on the screen and is like, in order for you to get Enrique back, John Feidelberg must say, I mean, what the fuck, man? Why me? You know what? You know what?

You would be so susceptible to that. They'd be like, like the terrorists, like the Al-Qaeda would be like, we've done an entire analysis of all of America. We have found like the one man we can bully into this. Who's got like a decent, like a nice chunk of money. It's John Feidelberg.

They should do that with fucking the right now. Anyone who kidnaps anyone should like put it on like Tom Cruise. Yeah. Right. Imagine that. I mean, you have to pay for this money. Like Tom Cruise has to give us $50,000.

Yeah. To make it, make it a reasonable amount, make it so that Tom will be like, all right, fine. Like I'll cut the check because he has to for PR reasons. Yeah. And it a reasonable amount. Make it so that Tom will be like, all right, fine. I'll cut the check. Because he has to for PR reasons.

Yeah. And he's got it. That's the best way to get ransom money. We got to start kidnapping people. We're brilliant. I think it's a great idea. By the way, did you see that stunt that he did? Yeah.

I mean, I know that Tom Cruise does his own stunts. Everybody always says like, oh, the Tom Cruise running. It's actually him. He runs fast. I didn't know he was fucking jumping motorcycles off of mountains. Yeah. Did he have, like, a parachute? He had a parachute.

But he, like, he, so he just did that and then deployed it, and then, like, I mean, even then you're still, like, fucking floating down a mountainside, you know? And he does those a lot. All the time. But, like, that wasn't, like, you know, they didn't nail the take that time. Right. Oh, that one thing. Dude, that wasn't, like... You know, they didn't nail the take that time. Right.

Oh, oh, you mean that one thing. Dude, he hit the halo jump in Mission Impossible 6. What's the halo jump? When he, like... Like, it's high-altitude, low-oxygen jumps. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Something like that.

Right. And, like, it's with him and fucking... What's his name? Fucking Henry Cavill. Mm-hmm. And Tom Cruise had to do that 100 times. Oh my god. I mean, he must get paid so much.

His agent must be like, alright, well, he risks his life like 250 times a shoot, so like... It was the... I could also see him being like, I do this for free. Like Ray Lewis, like, you pay me for the fucking drama scenes. I like this shit. You pay me from Monday through Saturday.

Sunday I give you free. What was it? It's 25,000 feet. It's a long... When I've gone skydiving, we only go 10,000. That's what my man David Blaine did the other day. Hopped on the balloons. 52 balloons went 20...

Listen. Watch your tone. You're a Blaine guy? I mean, I feel like I'm family with David Blaine. Like, I made fun of him on my One Minute Man, but I highly respect him. Big time. Remember MTV Made? Like, where it was like, you want to be this for a day? I would be David Blaine.

Really? I just respect the fuck out of him. I said he's like the kid in elementary school who's like, yo, yo, yo, you want to see me eat this shit? And it's like, I didn't, but okay. Or the icy hot guy. I'll put ice out of my balls. I wasn't planning on it, but okay. That's him with like, hey, you want to watch me just stand on top of a pole for 39 hours?

He's like, okay. Yeah, dude. But yeah, flew 52 hot air balloons. How annoying is this? He went 24,900 feet. Like, you got to hit 25. Or you got to have the guys back on the ground and be like, you hit 25. Right, right, right.

But then he had a, he pulled a rope and brought the parachute down and got into it. So, like, the whole time he was holding on, he was in, like, a harness, but he didn't actually have a parachute on. Really? And then while he held on, but then pulled this thing down, and I guess was able to let go at some point, but then suited up the parachute. That's pretty fucking... Again, I gave him a hard time on the video just for effect, but as far as nets and harnesses and shit go,

that's some badass shit. And he needed oxygen and everything. You ever see the video of the guy who jumps out without a parachute? Just lands in a big net? Oh, yeah, that's crazy. That's crazy. Yeah, that's wild. But almost in a way, what would you trust more?

A net or, like, I would always be worried, like, this is the parachute that's not going to deploy. Or it's going to get tangled or something. A giant net, you can see it's, like, there's a whole fucking net there. It's not going anywhere. Worry about fucking missing it, Kevin. Well, I mean, I imagine they're just gargantuan, no? I mean, it wasn't stunningly huge.

It's big, no doubt. Yeah. But you're jumping out of a plane. Yeah, it's like there's a big margin for error. Right. I hope I'm at the right moment. If you hesitate for a second, you miss it. Planes go fucking 500 miles an hour.

That's so true. Yeah, you jump now instead of now. You're not even close not for me all right uh interview time dr phil is back he's the best the fact that that man's worth 600 million dollars and he takes the time to just like bullshit with us and he does it with that like accent yeah he's the man so we did some m.i. the asshole with him we talked about some of our issues and then we get into uh the ellen situation with my my good friend Phillip. Brought to you by New Amsterdam Vodka specifically Pink Whitney.

Pink Whitney is the official vodka of official drink of the NHL. Poor Frankie Borelli. Not looking good for his Islanders. And also his dad. His dad also smashed him with a chair. His dad also threw a knife at the patrons of the restaurant and smashed him with a chair. If you have not threw a knife at the patrons of the restaurant smashed him and we have not seen that video the juxtaposition of frank frankie and his dad hugging

each other after game whatever that was and then uh the game that they lost his dad literally throws a knife in the air frankie collapses to the ground and mr braley picks up a chair from the braley's restaurant lifts it over his head and just smashes it down on frankie which i did confirm it hit him it hit him in the. It didn't like smash his head, but I was like, you know what? He probably like snuck away. He was still laying there and he just smashed him.

And I was like, wow. Like your dad was like, you know, he must've been like hamming it up for the camera, honey. He's like, you think he threw a fucking chair at me.

Awesome moment. Awesome. And if they just had, you know, some pink Whitney on hand, some new Amsterdam, maybe they could have just, it's a much better way to drown your sorrows.

Yeah, than violence. Than violence. But the live streams have been electric. So whether you're going to throw chairs, throw knives, or just win, lose, whatever with the NHL, whenever you're kicking back and watching some Stanley Cup playoffs, drink some official vodka of the NHL. Drink some New Amsterdam vodka. Drink some Pink Whitney.

And I'm going to need it now, too. I'm not a hockey guy now to, you know, I'm not a hockey guy, but maybe I should have been because the Islanders would have been the thing that brought me the most joy. They're probably going to lose this series. The Lightning are just a great... The Lightning are a great franchise. They like sports. I mean, the Tampa Bay Lightning have been around for every year. They're just always in the mix.

They got a cup, right? Dude, they're so good and their captain isn't playing. Who's the captain? Stephen Stamkos. Wow. Stamkos isn't playing and they're a fucking wack. Was that an opt-out or is he injured? No, no, no. He's hurt. He's been skating. There's a chance he... Oh, wow. Imagine that. Shit.

So, you know, Lightning fan. Lightning fans, bring out some Whitney to celebrate. Islanders fans, bring out some New Amsterdam to drown your sorrows. Everyone else can enjoy it. Get it at your local liquor store or on the website. Go to New Amsterdam and get your Pink Whitney. Let's talk to him.

There he is. Dr. Phil, what's going on, bud? Hey, what's happening guys? How are we? Long time since I was in your office. I know, but we've moved offices since then, in fact. Yeah, we upgraded a little bit. The last time we had you in was our office.

That was pretty much embarrassing, and now we've got a little bit more of a legit setup. Yeah, you look like you're in a studio there. Yeah, back at it. And you look like you're in a fake library, I'll be honest. Those books are not real books, are they? They actually are. This is not a virtual background i'm in them but it they are staged it's not like a real library they're staged but it is a real they're staged very nice it looks

sharp that's all it looks like uh i'm gonna i'm gonna say um goth goth architecture back there it looks like you're in a church yeah It's very sharp looking. Well, good. So I'm very holy today. So we just saw a TikTok that you posted right before we got going here where you were requesting that the internet stops calling you daddy, which is, first of all, it's amazing. That TikTok's amazing. Second of all, the fact that everyone does call you Daddy,

it sounds like it makes you a little uncomfortable, but it's a huge compliment, Phil. It's a great one. No, it's just a big joke. You know, there's a trend on TikTok. You've got to stop and then fill in the sentence. So I filled in the sentence, calling me Daddy. You know, by the way, it's a bad sign

when Dr. Phil's telling us the TikTok trends. We got to get up on our trends, man. I was unaware of that fact. Yeah, that was the number one trend on TikTok, so they asked me to fill in the sentence. I was teasing a lot of my followers. We have a lot of fun. They know it's a joke.

That is good, though. If someone says, hey, fill in the blank, you got to stop. And your first reaction is calling me daddy. I mean, you got it going on. Has that been going on for a long time now? Oh, yeah. Look at my Instagram. I mean, it doesn't matter what I put.

I put up a picture of a bird or a book, whatever, the response is, Daddy. Now, what do you think makes someone call someone Daddy? Because not to brag, Dr. Phil, but it's happened to me one time, and we were in the sheets, we were mixing it up, and it was a long time ago. It was before it was ever really a trend. I think his girl was the first person to call him Daddy because it was like 10 years ago.

It was not my girl. It was a girl. The girl he was with. And it was nine years ago, let's say, something along those lines. And I got a daddy in my ear. And I'll tell you what, Dr. Phil, it took me aback very strongly. What inspires someone to say something like that? What's the psychology behind that?

Well, I think they're teasing me as an authority figure. I think they maybe see me as the principal at school or something. I was in school for quite a while. I never called the principal dad. Are you keeping up with any of the other internet trends? Because there's a couple others that

have you ever seen on Twitter where they say Bumba Clot? keeping up with any of the other internet trends because there's a couple others that, like, have you ever, have you ever seen on Twitter where they say Bumba clot? Say what? Yeah, exactly. They say, you just post a picture and you say Bumba clot and then the people just react however they want to react.

Right. I don't even know. It goes viral almost every time I see it. Just, it's just Bumba clot. Next time you want to really, you know what? Do me a favor,

post something on Twitter and just say Bumba Clot, and people will go wild for it. All right. I'll take the dare. What about the phrase, if I say to you, no cap? Have you ever heard that? No cap? Yeah.

It means like no bullshit, I'm not lying, no cap. You drop that as well, people will be. I think they threw that one at me one time with visco girl and a couple of others that i had no idea yep you know yeah they they have great fun humiliating me on the internet so that's what the internet's for yeah that's really the whole point i'm a willing participant so it's okay how how, now, I'm going to talk to Dr. Phil here. How bad do you think the internet is going to affect us long-term? Because we talk about this a lot, and you just said, like, you know, they're teasing me and whatnot.

And those things are all, you can either ignore them if it's genuine hate, or you can kind of participate and lean into it if it's fun teasing. But either way, I think it's going to have a severe effect on our long-term psychology let's say 15 20 years down the road well there is no question that look how much it's changed how many times have you walked around you see people like this you never saw that before and hey that's probably going to ruin our necks yep they actually said that uh some millennials are almost growing like a bone spur out of the bottom of their neck because their heads are always down. Yeah, and we're going to have some kind of thumb thing.

It's like carpal tunnel. We're going to have thumb tunnel or something. But I think there are pros and cons. I mean, kids now have no idea that a library is a big brick building with books in it because you can Google anything. We used to have to idea that a library is a big brick building with books in it. Right. Because you can Google anything. We used to have to go to the library, of course.

So that's a big change. I think social skills, looking people in the eye, actually having a relationship, I think that erodes some. But there's great positives to it. There's a lot of power that Gen Z has because they can fact check somebody giving a speech while they're giving it. You know, somebody can say something. They can fact check it while they're saying it. Right. Like, excuse me. I mean, there are pros and cons to it.

What I hate about it is young people that measure their self-worth and self-esteem based on likes. And they'll put up a picture and it doesn't get as many likes as yesterday. So they feel down and then they get the haters. They let the haters get to them. And I've dealt with so many stories where particularly girls have taken their own life. One girl hung herself last week, and who knows what all the reasons were, but there was a lot of activity on her internet of people telling her, why don't you just go kill yourself?

Nobody likes you. Everybody hates you. And sure enough, she hung herself. Now, was it because of that or something else? We don't know, but I think that's a huge negative. I think the ability it's given to anonymous folks to be mean, like teasing is not a new thing, right? Being mean at a young age or at an old age, it's been around forever,

being rude and awful to people. We've really perfected it. But now everyone can, you can make 10 accounts and she can think everyone's telling her to kill herself and it's just this one person who doesn't like her and you don't have to say it to her face and you can be as rude as possible there's really no consequences to the actions and i think you said it good too with you know like the picture you posted today didn't have as many likes as yesterday i'm a 32 year old adult man and that bothers me i can't imagine what it does teenage girl teenage kid yeah yeah and you know i call them keyboard bullies they they'd say things there

that they would not say to you in the elevator yeah right you're on the elevator with somebody they wouldn't say some of the shit they type out on that because they don't have to face you and if you've got people that have poor self-esteem or a ill-defined self-image they those people really get to them the haters get to them and it bothers them and i'm fortunately one of those people that does not have the need to be loved by strangers so i don't really care but i say i don't think i have that need to be loved either but no one likes to be told you're a piece of shit yeah right it's like i don't care if you like me but if you're just always but i prefer you don't hate

it hurts me yeah yeah nobody likes to read trash about themselves on the internet i mean trust me you don't have to need to be loved by strangers for that to bother you but i think young kids are vulnerable to it you know, you have insight to it. You understand that it bothers you. And so you're aware of it. Kids don't have the conversation with themselves that you just had with yourself. And so they go back in their bedroom and it really bothers them. It bothers me in my bedroom too.

One of the things we do on our show is we go through a Reddit page called Am I the Asshole? Which is usually a couple or a person in a social situation asking, am I right or am I wrong? And we ran into two that I thought were very particularly interesting, and I'd like to get your insight on it. The first one was basically a guy in a relationship who his girlfriend and his father both made him throw out he collected action figures and played with figurines and that was his passion and he would wait till everyone goes to sleep at night and he would play with them you know alone and he knew it was a little bit you know immature and childish but it was you know his thing and they wanted him to throw it out he he said no and then they just took them and threw them out without asking him.

And so the question was like, who's in the wrong here? And they made it clear that the wife who was writing this article made it clear, like, and can you believe he even cried when we threw away the toys? He's a child. He threw a temper tantrum. They put a lot of negative connotations into his emotions. And we just kind of tackled it as like,

I think a lot of times guys particularly are forced to give up, you know, what they like or love, or it's deemed, you know, silly or childish to like some of the things they do. And at the end of the day, we think it's just like,

that's their hobby or that's what makes them happy. Like what, what advice would you give for someone who's in that spot? She threw all of his stuff out. Yes. Her and her and his father his father yeah i got a real problem with that yeah thank you thank you thank you people thought we were crazy because we were on his side the amount of people who are like come on you're a grown man you

shouldn't be playing with dolls and toys it's like yeah listen maybe it's a little bit unorthodox but who fucking cares let this guy live yeah no kidding i'm not saying i don't care what it was they threw out now if let me be clear about that if they got in there and found something illegal like child pornography or something yeah yeah whatever okay now call the law and put his ass under the jail but if you're just not liking what he likes and you throw it away kiss my ass you you don't have a right to throw his stuff away amen like i've got a lot of t-shirts that are well i like to call them future rags. But, and I wear them,

I play tennis in them every day because they're comfortable, right? They're, they're comfortable, but they got holes in them here and there, but she would never throw them out because I like them. Right. Like you just got to respect what your partner likes for me to wear them, but I like them. You don't take somebody's stuff and throw them out what a bitch and she made it clear too it was almost like she was arguing against herself she made it very clear that they have a happy relationship that he

always makes time for her it's not an addiction or anything like that it's usually he usually goes and plays with them once she goes to bed it's really it's his escape it's his it's his little time to shut himself off from the world to get away from his bitch girlfriend. And just participate in something he likes. If his dad was in on this, his dad needs to mind his own damn business.

That's right. And the problem with it was, too, one of the problems, obviously there were a couple, was that they were, she was pregnant, and they were going to use that room that he uses for the baby's room for the cradle and things like that what better room to give to a child than a room full of toys like why do you have to clean that room out but you know what you negotiate those things so maybe if they need the room fine i get it negotiate it but you don't go throw it out after he's gone to bed what's up with that and what about this what where where do you draw the line between you're helping someone maybe improve themselves versus you're

trying to change them i think a lot of times a girl will get a guy to dress quote-unquote better but you're really changing like his style or you know we're gonna go to these type of places now we're not gonna hang out at the spots you used to have. Is there a, is there a level of that that's good? Or is that always like you're trying to change the person and you should just go find a different partner who embodies the things you like? Look, relationships are negotiations and the negotiation never change, never ends. It's an ongoing sort of thing. And if you're wanting to negotiate for him or her to change a habit or a pattern, that's fine, but it's always up to them. If they decide, okay, hey, you got a good point, so we'll go to a different restaurant or hang out a different

place or something, that's fine. But you don't dictate it, you negotiate it. Now what about instead of negotiation, you just subtly insult it every time they do it? How's that for health? Well, that's a negotiation ploy. That's a tactic, yeah. Just very subtle digs every time they do something you don't like. Yeah, so where is it you're going that she doesn't

like the bar every night they got a little too close to home just hypothetically speaking on that one uh the other situation we we ran into was uh a gentleman who proposed to his girlfriend and he kind of did it admittedly the first time was like they were laying in bed and it wasn't very romantic he was kind of like hey do you want to get engaged and it was over uh covid right uh yes so it was in quarantine he couldn't you know quite carry out the plan so he said let's get married but hey i i promised at one point i'll give you the romantic engagement then he does what he thought was romantic she said you know that still really wasn't what I had planned. He went back

to the drawing board again. He did that three more times. One of them took her on vacation. They stayed in a nice hotel, proposed to her on the balcony, I believe. Music. He kept upping the romance. She also said that one, no thanks. She kept saying, nope, that's still not what I

had envisioned and I want to remember this for the rest of my life, so go back to the drawing board again. I think he ended up having to propose four or five times, and each time she rejected it. What would you say there, Dr. Phil? Man, you should have taken that first rejection and hit the road. I firmly believe if you propose, you should absolutely know with certainty you've got a yes in the bag. Do you agree? 100%.

You can't be like a spontaneous thing. It's got to be, you know, you know. If you really don't know what the answer is, you're not ready to ask. There you go. You hit the nail on the head there. That's the old, if you can't afford it, if you have to ask's the nail on the head. That's the reason you're Dr. Phil. That's the old, if you can't afford it, you know, if you have to ask, you can't afford it. That's exactly the same thing. Yeah. I mean, it's like, it's like lawyers will tell you, you'd never ask a

question in court that you don't know the answer to. Right. You don't ever ask girl, Mary, if you don't know what she's going to say. Are you kidding me? You're kidding me? How did you propose? We've been, we just had our 44th anniversary. Ah, congratulations. And we were together like five years before that. And we were spending a whole lot of time together. And she asked me, you know, are we ever going to like get married? And I said, you know, we ever gonna like get married and I said you know I'm really not ready to do that so she said bye really wow and you came around and that came up

right at Christmas vacation when we were in college and I spent about two and a half weeks without her in my life every day. And I actually kind of dated around a little bit. Had a fun two and a half weeks? Then I would go home afterwards and call her and talk to her until three in the morning. And so I thought, you know, who am I kidding here? That's young, though. So you were engaged in college?

This was graduate school. Oh, okay. All right. So a little bit later. I like picturing Dr. Phil being the, no, you hang up. No, you hang up. No, you hang up, Daddy. No, I think it was me falling asleep and she was still talking.

But after that, it was like, who am I kidding here? So I said, look, you're absolutely right. We should definitely get married. Now, how about this? Now, things were definitely different 44 years ago. Why didn't she pop the question? That's right. How about you get down on a knee and ask me to be your betrothed?

You play a little hardball, Phil. As I look back on this, I think she was definitely in control of the whole situation. Exactly, the whole time. Women are great at making you think that you have a say in this. I think it was...

Always. Another discussion we've been having here in the past couple days is regarding texting. We were talking about how much you can text and what's kind of a good amount and an unhealthy amount. And I was saying I found myself in a situation where I text a lot in the beginning when it's, you know, happy and fun and you want to talk to someone. But then you almost set this expectation that you're supposed to text, you know, 18 hours a day. And if you're not texting, then where are you or what's going wrong or whatever? Uh, how much, how do you think you should handle that in a relationship? Well, I think it's really important that you think about

it going in. Cause you don't want to set a standard. You can't keep her. They're going to call you on bait and switch. Like, okay. When you were after me, me it was like you just couldn't text enough and then now we're together and all of a sudden i can't find you with both hands so you got to be careful that you don't set a standard that you can't keep so you got to be real careful and be thoughtful about setting a standard going in that's the one one I nailed. So you think, like, in the beginning, let's say you're really, you know, you're in the honeymoon phase and you're all schmoopy schmoopy, head over heels.

I'm going to text her right now. You think you should say to yourself, like, no, I'm not going to right now because I got to think about down the road. Well, there's an infatuation phase and you both have fun with that, but you do need to think about the fact, is she aware of what's happening here?

Because, I mean, you do things early on that you don't do later, but don't set a standard you can't keep. If she's going to hold you to that, you've got to think about this. You know, if you start buying huge gifts in the beginning, what are you going to do later? It's a hard act to follow. I'm amazing at that. John keeps the bar real up.

I'm really good at just being like, look, this is what I am. This is it. This is what you get. I forget days. I forget to reply to texts. I'm not very good looking. This is just why I don't dress up. I'm like, this is it.

This is it. You want this? That's your own funeral, but this is it. Yeah. Then you got nothing to live up to, right? Right, exactly. Bar has always been on the floor, and I don't bend over to pick it up because it hurts my back. I mean, that's right.

You can't fall off the floor, so what you got? Amen. Now, you have season 19 of Dr. Phil coming up, correct? Crazy. Yes. Was that all filmed pre-corona, or did you do season 19 of Dr. Phil coming up, correct? Crazy. Yes. Was that all filmed pre-corona or did you do that kind of like post? No, we finished up last season shooting from home because they shut down Paramount lot. And we've come back now with very rigorous guidelines with a COVID-19 task force. We can't have an audience. We can't have any guests that

are flown in. So they either have to drive in or we have to do them virtually and our audience is virtual. But I felt like we wanted to have a branded product like they had seen for the last 18 years. So we are back on the lot. We are back on the stage. We've got the screens. We've got the graphics. We've got the video packages. We're delivering what we did the first 18 years.

It's not a scaled-down version. It's the full Dr. Phil experience that we've had before. But it took a lot to get there, I got to tell you. What do you think something like this is going to do? Because I know when corona started and people were talking about mental health and in quarantine, I think everywhere is kind of branched out and there's much less quarantine going on now. But just the three months of living in your home,

how do you think that will affect people? Even just all the testing and the masks and really the fear of fellow humans, how do you think that's going to, do you think that will have a long-term effect on us, or do you think once we have a vaccine we'll be good? I do think it has a long-term effect, and research has shown

in other circumstances and situations, loneliness has a profound effect. It has a profound effect on our kids being out of school. They're developmentally delayed. They're educationally delayed. So, I mean, they're missing, older kids are missing graduation and prom and stuff. And that's a problem for them. The younger kids are not getting the educational experience. They'll be less competitive. And there's research that suggests they may never close the gap.

So this is a profound effect to have this extended quarantine. It is. Sorry to interrupt. It's a problem. It's a problem. We need to get back as fast as we can safely do it. It's one of those things where as a, as an adult now, I look back on my prom and I'm like, Oh, who gives a shit? You know, like it was a fine night. It was

whatever, but it didn't have a major impact on my life. But in that moment, it's the most important thing in the world to you. And so having that taken away from you is awful. Yeah. And sports, I mean, and it's not just sports, you know, kids that are into choir and debate team and all sorts of things. Those are experiences that you can't replace. And so they'll miss those. And it pales in comparison to the fact that you've still got your family around you and all that. There's no question. But the educational experience is going to make them less competitive.

I went to a dentist the other day for some minor things, and he's on the faculty of a major university with a dental school. And he said, let me tell you, you don't want to let a 2020 graduate touch you for about 10 years. Cause we graduated them with very little experience. That happened in the medical field as well. Right. And, and, and, uh, doctors like a medical doctors where it was, they wanted everyone to get out into the task force or, you know, be able to help. And they were like, go ahead. No, no hands on, no practicum. No, you know, they just didn't have the experience. So that kind of scared me.

I'm like, well, hell, where else is that a factor? Well, guess what, Dr. Phil, I haven't been to a doctor in 10 years, so I'll just keep that running. I'll catch you guys in 20 years. I don't want to put you on the spot too much here, but one of your contemporaries ran into some issues in the news with Ellen, and I feel like without knowing what's going on behind the scenes i feel like sometimes people might confuse you know being

very successful and being professional and you know sticking to uh their ways as like confused with mean or or rude or whatever um but do you ever run into any issues like that i mean obviously you're a big star in your own right is Is there any concern with like, I have to treat interns or employees or younger members or junior members in a certain way so that I don't get slandered? Well, you know, it's lonely at the top and, you know, anytime you're the head of an organization and, you know, this isn't just restricted entertainment you've seen it in a lot of other areas too um you're going to get pot-shotted a lot when you're at the top and um i've i don't know that i've ever even been on the ellen show um she and i know

each other and we're very friendly that's so awesome awesome to be like, I'm not sure if I've been on the L.A. show. Yeah, you would know if you don't. That would be the highlight of so many people's lives. You're like, I don't know, maybe I did it, maybe I didn't. Well, it's been a lot of years. I don't know if I have been or not, but I don't remember anything about it if I have. So I can't really, and I'm not just ducking, I really don't have an opinion of what it's like over there. I have. So I can't really, and I'm not just ducking. I really don't have an

opinion of what it's like over there. I have no idea. I know her and we're very friendly with each other. She's been to my home. And is it something you've been cognizant of, like in your own operation, like, you know, as time has gone on, maybe people have gotten a little more sensitive or just the workplace has changed. Now you have to worry about people airing you out on the internet, or is it something that you've always just treated people the same way? Well, you know, you, you do always have to be cognizant of it. And we've got a situation at Dr. Phil where I've had the same executive producer for 19 years,, same supervising producers.

Hell I've had the same seven cameramen since the day I started. Well, one of them passed away, um, about a year and a half ago. It was a great guy passed away. So I've got six of the seven I started with. I've got the same director. I've got the same everybody. So we don't have a lot of turnover, uh, there. We've got a great. Well, I think that's a pretty great testament. Yeah. I think you're same everybody's. We don't have a lot of turnover there. We've got a great.

Well, I think that's a pretty great testament to you. Yeah. I think you're doing something right. Well, let me tell you, I've got this great knack for getting these gigs where somebody does all the work and I get all the credit. I'm the first one to admit it. One log won't burn. If they don't put somebody in front of me that's interesting, then'm just sitting out there staring at the camera i get it yeah but listen you could put anybody out there and if you don't interview them right or question them right it's you know it's

not the same don't sell yourself short dr phil well if everybody could do it you know they would so yeah i got a good crew though i got the best crew in television they work hard and got a good crew, though. I got the best crew in television. They work hard and do a good job, and I let them know it. All right, well, that's why you're heading on to season 19, so everyone's looking forward to it. And as always, we appreciate the time and thanks for the advice on the purely hypothetical situations. Purely hypothetical. Who do we like tonight, by the way?

What's that? Who do we like tonight in Texas Chiefs? I got to go with the chiefs chiefs with the spread pretty safe bet i think pretty much forever what is the spread nine oh well now that's it's a big number that's a big number it's gonna be interesting this year with just everything that's a lot of points that's a lot of points for the first game right but the first game but i think it's it's all thrown out the window really where it's only you know like before big games like throw the

record out the window we're just ever the way every season has always started with just training camps and preseason games and these guys haven't even tackled yet all out the window it's gonna be i think it's gonna be a point bonanza tonight yeah well I was such a fine football player myself that I have great expertise in calling these things. I was the shittiest linebacker to ever play the game. Dr. Phil, I find that very hard to leave.

I've met you. You're a big boy. You're a big dad. You can lay some wood. Yeah, but at least I was slow. I was big, least i was slow i was big but i was slow i guess what i'm slow and not that big either so at least you have one of the two one yeah all right dr phil thanks a lot thank you so much dr phil talk to you next time appreciate it anytime anytime i can't wait good luck with the show see you later i've got some issues that nobody can see and all of these emotions are pouring out of me i'll bring soundtrack to my life

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