KFC Radio - Duncan Trussell, The Death of Ad Blockers, and Line 'Em Up Blow 'Em Down

Episode Date: April 30, 2020

Don't forget to subscribe, rate 5 stars, and leave. a review! We kick off the show saying goodbye to the ad blocker and the man who loved to draw large women sitting on men's faces. Am I the A**hole Thursday returns with the garden gate, my girlfriend shaved her head because I got a mullet, and being annoyed with my girlfriend's zest for life. Voicemails include guardian animal and where would you stand in line? Today's interview is with Duncan Trussel [01:03:06]. This is one of our favorite interviews we've done. Duncan has a new show out on Netflix called The Midnight Gospel, which is a psychedelic cartoon that's dialogue is pulled from podcast interviews he's done. In the interview we discuss buddhism, magicians, losing a parent, Duncan's longtime friendship with Joe Rogan, the concept of hope, his interview with Dr Drew, and so much more. Tweet at us what you think of the show @kfcradio @kfcbarstool @feitsbarstool and our guest @duncantrussellYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's another edition of KFC Radio on the Barstool Sports Network. And I got to pay my respects as we kick things off here. We got a big episode with an awesome interview with Duncan Trussell, who is a great podcaster, friend of Joe Rogan's, and has a new show out on Netflix, which is one of the most interesting shows I think you'll ever see.

Somebody I'm in love with. Let's just clear that up. What's that? Didn't say somebody I'm in love with. Feidelberg is going to find a way to marry this man. I don't know where Duncan lives. I believe he's from North Carolina. I imagine he lives in LA now. But if I lived anywhere near Duncan, I'd be a hippie in a week. Oh, yeah. I would totally buy into it. It's a shock that I haven't been converted to anything.

I don't want to say cult because he's a Buddhist. It's shocking that someone hasn't taken advantage of my personality yet. You are ripe for the picking. You're just like, hey, give me a couple facts. Give me a couple pros. Don't mention any of the cons and I will just follow you. In a heartbeat.

But for some reason, they just haven't tried. I watched Waco and thought they were the good guys. Yeah. Well, that show, that's not your fault necessarily because that show with Jim Riggins, it's now on Netflix. It was on Spike TV. They did not paint that whole picture the right way.

Those girls were raping little girls. It was quite a favorable – but was he? Well, yeah, actually he was. Yes, yes. He was married to a 14-year-old. But like they say in the show, look, and it is so weird to have Tim Riggins be it because, like, I'll die for Tim. Yes. And it's – they have that clip in the car where it's like if your issue is with – your issue is with Texas law, not – because it was the law.

Yeah, right. Then it's like, well, I have issues with both. How about that? Yes. It's like for sure, I'll take that up with my local legislator. But also anybody who takes advantage of that law, I got a problem with, bro. Yeah. But you're right. Casting Tim Riggins as that is just not – maybe he wanted to do that.

Like let me be the bad guy. I don't know. How about – like do you think that Tom Hanks – I want Tom Hanks' next movie role to be like a rapist, like a pedophile, like as bad as it gets. Do you think he could do that? I bet Tom Hanks could, yeah. Yes, he could because he's so talented, but like, I think people would be like on his side.

I bet you the producers would be like, no, damn it! We're trying to like point out the injustices and you guys are all on his side. What the fuck? Because everybody just loves Tom Hanks that much. He should play himself. What was Robin Williams' movie? The Pictures. You guys are all on his side. What the fuck? Because everybody just loves Tom Hanks that much. He should put himself in it, right? With a photo. What was Robin Williams' movie?

The Pictures. Yeah, but like that's what I mean. You know, yeah, he did a good job, but it wasn't like regarded as one of his best because it was just like, eh, let's go back to being like a funny man, you know? You know, it's funny as you mentioned cult. I just love it. I feel bad. I want to cut that out. I't like i do not want to attribute that to duncan right now no no no we get what you're saying he's duncan's very he's into buddhism

and he's into a lot of these philosophical and emotional uh type of you know um not religions you just make you feel good about yourself yes that's no good yesterday which is the point by the way that some people probably do that's why that's why I don't like when people go so far atheist. Like I really don't believe in all the mumbo jumbo. I hate the money involved. I hate the self-loathing and the penance and repenting, all that shit. But the basic ideas of religion and stuff are like to make you feel good and to make you like other people and to be happy and safe and love. And that's kind of what, you you know that's what he's promoting um but but the cult stuff is is is for sure out there it's

the real deal and i just learned we talked about this a week ago that sex cult from back in the day that everybody knew the girl from smallville was in i just found out that kristin crook was in it too i don't i didn't know why these people were in it. So I was a Smallville fan back in the day. No surprise there. You texted this to me maybe over the weekend or fairly recently. I thought you were talking about Epstein stuff. This is a different thing.

Yeah, this is like years ago. They had a cult called Nomad or something. It was a sex cult. And this guy was the leader, he would have like his main girls and they would recruit other people. You had to get his initials like carved into you, like branded and carving.

And one of the girls was, I want to say Allison Mack or something like that. No, that's a fake person. The real life. Yeah, that's a fake person. The real life. Allison Mack. Yeah, that's a made up.

That was made up by me. But it was Allison Mack. Allison Mack was the blonde on Smallville named Chloe. And she was in this sex cult very famously because she was the right hand woman. She was like the main. She was the right hand woman she was like the main she was the bottom bitch she was the main girlfriend and some dude tweeted me saying like uh can you believe that i was bringing up kristen crook saying how hot she was and he was like how about her in a sex cult i was like nah bro you got the wrong smallville girl and he's like no dude send me the link to the new york post kristen crook was very much in that sex cult as well she

threw out a tweet back in like 2006 or whatever being like sorry didn't know that they were like kidnapping and raping people my bad it sounded like she was just there for like she was there for the party like yeah let's go to like this hollywood like orgy basically and as soon as some real shit was going on she she she exited real quick but that girl john she was and is she's one of the most underrated girls of all time she's so hot she's like she's like part eskimo part japanese is she the wild on girl no no no no uh you're thinking that's brooke burke right i got alliterations getting me i don't think I know who the show is. Oh, she is. You probably wouldn't because the only thing she was ever in,

she was Lana Lang in Smallville. But, man, she was the one. Had I known she was in a sex cult, boy, teenage me would have been just pounding off to the thought of that one. Jesus Christ. But also, as we're strolling down, yeah, here she is. Ah, she has this exotic look to her, John, that a young me was like, I have never seen a girl look quite like this before. And I think she really is like every ethnicity under the sun and apparently in a sex

cult. But as we're strolling down memory lane here, I want to, I want to pay respects and I want to have a formal funeral and a proper ceremony and services for a, a, a thing that has given us so much over the years. I want to pay my respects to internet ad blockers, because I don't know what happened recently. I don't know if they passed some sort of legislation with like net neutrality. I don't know if, if content creators and website owners all just finally banded together and said, fuck it. We have to have to unite against ad blockers, but every website I go to now, every newspaper, every online publication, everything says disable your ad blocker or pay money or you can't look at it. And it just happened recently.

And I started to notice like, oh, okay, well, it happened with like the Boston Globe first and the Washington Post. And then like Business Insider did it. And now it's everything. And I think it's officially the death of ad blockers and really when we look back on it i think it's one of the greatest services that has ever been provided especially back when pop-up ads would like literally eat your computer alive uh it was that's the one thing i didn't care i never i actually haven't had ad blocker in probably like like – I don't know. You can go to Daily Mail right now.

You go to Daily Mail without an AdBlocker, you can't do anything. Yeah, I think I just stopped going to websites. So I didn't have the need for it anymore. Like I used like Twitter. Or media. Or Reddit. And that was like – to this day, it's basically Twitter, Reddit, Barstool Sports.

That's about – and obviously like porn and Netflix, things like that. But just like time-wasting websites and like things to just scroll through, that's basically Twitter, Reddit, Barstool Sports. That's about it. And obviously, like, porn and Netflix, things like that. But just, like, time-wasting websites and, like, things that just scroll through, that's basically all I do. So I do it. And you wouldn't realize because if you go now, even just having the banner ads. It's noticeable because I'll click through, like, a tweet. So that's where I notice it. But, like, I never – I haven't gone to the the dailymail.com since we were fucking churning blogs out. Right. Well, that's actually why, though.

As I've tried to get back into the blog game, I started to do my routine of like open up Reddit, open up the New York Post, open up Daily Mail. I used to open up Gothamist to find New York City stories. I had a whole I would just like, you know, hit control T, control T, and just start opening up all

these new tabs, and all of them are blocked And then when you unblock them you realize That like oh here's a remnant ad Here's a targeted ad here's a pop up Here's a this here's a that And I don't know exactly what happened But it's very noticeable they finally stood up And said fuck off

How fucking stupid were you What took them so fucking long I don't know People have just been coming to your house fucking robbing things, shitting on the floor. What the fuck took you so long to be like, hey, we're not going to allow you to just take stuff. You're going to have to pay for things you like now.

Well, you know, funny, we just did the episode of paying for content and top five things worth paying the money for. Which, by the way, we probably should have done that fucking before we started Barstool Gold. Instead of after. Yeah. Once we made Barstool Gold free, we were like, yeah, pay for content. But as much as I do agree with that,

there was something about when they wouldn't let me do the ad blocker, I was like, who the fuck do these guys think they are? I have to, my eyeballs have to be subjected to the advertising that gives you money. Fuck off. I don't know what it was,

but part of me felt very, very, very violated by the fact that I had to turn my ad blocker off. But now such is the way it's over. It's a wrap for ad blockers. RIP. I'm just going to, I'm not even going to,

I'm going to take it off my browser. I'm going to uninstall the plugin. Cause it just, I remember when Keith used to get mad at me when we sat next to each other, he'd be like, why are you watching an ad before YouTube? I don't know. It was playing.

Well, that too. Yeah. You don't realize like if you've been doing ad blockers, like I have, you don't realize, I mean, pre-roll videos stink.

They don't bother me at all. I mean, pre-roll videos stink. They're the worst. They don't bother me at all. Because you've just been doing them. For the last five years, you haven't watched a single one. You'd be like, what the fuck is going on? You're like five seconds long. What are you in such a rush for? Just watch the five seconds and you move on.

Yeah, but it's one of those things. Maybe we'll do a top five eventually of uh of like things that seem longer than they are you know like five seconds when you're uh you know we've done this before it's like a minute if you're if you're if you're watching a pot of boiling water feels like forever a minute during sex feels like nothing it's all relative and those five seconds of my pre-roll ad is, I mean, talk about inconvenience, John. Let's get into the rest of our show here today, but I do want to pay my respects to the ad blocker because it has been here forever for me, just like Miller Lite has. Miller Lite was the original beer I started drinking. When I turned 21, I was drinking Miller Lite as my preferred beer, and I haven't changed ever since. And there's a reason why, because it is great taste, less

filling. Shout out to the GTFL crew out there in Chicago. They're drinking their Miller Lites too. And it's a beer you can always count on, just like I was able to always count on my ad blocker. The difference is that no one's ever going to band together and tell me I can't drink my Miller Lite. It's going to be there forever, especially over Zoom, over the podcast, when you're getting together with friends, when you're by yourself. It doesn't matter whether it's quarantine or post-quarantine. Miller Lite will always be there for you to tell some stories, spin some yarns, have some laughs, and tell some tales. Where's the first place you're going to go and drink a Miller Lite when we can get out?

Factory 380. That's the spot. As long as we think it's open, right? Yeah. It'll be there. I'm going right back to the Clown Bar, worst bar in Manhattan. I'm going to meet up with my two dads,

get some Miller Lights, and look around and why the fuck are we here? Because that's what we used to do anyway. The worst bar in the world, and I can't get enough of it. But as long as there's Miller Light there, I'll be there. Miller Light, the original light beer,

while you're home, enjoy a classic. It's available for delivery today, too, so you can get it sent right to your doorstep, and you can celebrate responsibly with the Miller Brewing Company from Milwaukee, Wisconsin. Every beer, 12 ounces, 96 calories, 3.2 carbs. And it's always there for you to have a good time. Dude, when you said just an RIP, remind me of this blog I'm about to do when we get done with this. I sent it in the chat, so copy and paste that link.

And this Japanese artist just died. He fucking loved drawing fucking bitchy bitches sitting on faces. That's all he liked to do. Dude, I thought it was just a big girl, and then I scrolled and saw the face. No, he liked drawing fucking pogs just sitting on slaves' faces. This dude was the original will you sit on my face. This guy was

sending calligraphy letters, I bet, being like hey bitch, will you come over and sit on my face? Dude, these pictures are awesome. Not only are they awesome, this picture has a guy, instead of a bar stool he is chained to the bar and his face is the seat and she's just sitting on it and guess what this

motherfucker this dude this is like this is him in an ass is like monday with the lily ponds like these things are fucking beautiful this guy knows how to fucking draw an app look at those things this is like i feel like i'm looking at pictures of flower tushy right here yeah what a girl what a woman the only thing missing the only reason i know it's not flower tushy is because there's not a fucking puddle underneath yo it's such a fine line between me being like you are a creepy japanimation anime weirdo pre-crime lock you up and being like these are awesome these are fucking awesome look man that's just art that and look you said you fucking i don't know what museums these things are hung up in because like art is nice and it makes you makes

you think and all that but it rarely also makes you come and this thing does all three for me this thing this thing i'm like oh i get this right like i i appreciate the beauty of the drawing i understand the message it's trying to send and also that's a fucking fat ass you got a fatty girl all right p to that cat and blockers and that japanese fucking uh artist he's like the original and he's such the original internet commenter. The motherfucker never used his real name so I didn't even know how old he was.

That guy was probably saying things like I would crawl through three miles of shit to sniff your fart from a toilet bowl or something. I'd drag my balls through a bunch of glass and drink up bath water. Sit on my

face in a bar that's him that's fucking him man unreal rest in peace bud uh we'll get into am I the asshole in a minute but first I want to get your opinion on this Scott Burrell's Scott Burrell's uh wife uh Janae Coakley Scott Burrell's the guy from uh from The Last Dance who MJ was busting his balls saying he's Baby Rodman. He parties so much. And Scott Burrell was very much, first of all, how weird is it that he called him M? It's Michael. It's Mike. It's MJ. It's not just M. But it's like, M, M, my parents are going to see this. Anyway, 20 whatever years later, his wife, she's an anchor and a personality for SNY here in New York, and she is saying how awesome this is. And she's laughing about it, and she's saying, well, I was in high school.

It was a long time ago. I think it's cool. You buying that? You think that's true? I'm not not buying it. Uh-huh. Yeah, I'm not buying it. Yeah, I'm not buying it. Yeah, right. Because I wrote the blog.

I can bet she's not – she's probably not mad. Right. She has no right to be mad. No, no, no. That's the thing. I think she's mad. I think she knows she has no right to be mad and so she's not saying anything but my experience in women and that's why I wanted to ask you because I know

that I'm a bit bitter and jaded and warped but my experience with women is it doesn't matter if it's irrational for them to be upset they're going to be upset it could happen 20 years ago they still don't like it I think she's mad

she'd rather not hear it's like a fucking like a. I think she's mad. I think she'd rather not hear it. It's like fucking, it's significant how there's like a public toilet where it's like, you know other people have been there before, you just don't want to think about it. Just a note to the fellas out there, don't ever describe your girlfriend as a public toilet.

It's not. That's not like a, I was talking about me. Like, you know there's been somewhere around. It's the, and in fact, that was described to me by a girlfriend, which I was like, oh, OK. That's not great. I had a girlfriend explain it. That's where I learned that. I'm just like a I'm like a toilet seat at Penn station, you know?

Yes. I mean, nobody ever has the right to be upset or bothered, but people have insecurities and they don't like to hear certain things. And, you know, she personally, I could see her being like, yeah, I don't know. It's cool. You were running with Jordan and Pippen. But when the first, when they get together with a couple other couples for the first time and the girls are whispering like, did you hear what Scott used to do in 1998? And the guys are like, yo, Scott, tell me about it. What was it like in the hotel with Rodman?

No girl likes that. No girl likes that. But you probably don't like it, but also people who are married to professional athletes aren't under the impression that they married fucking choir boys. That is true. She's not like, oh, I wonder what he was up to in 97. What was he, an accountant? Accountant is my go-to.

I know. I honestly get to laugh at that. Bob Fox did it recently too. I feel like, I don't know if it's because of me or not, but everybody at Barstool always leans on their real-world example is accountant. very accountants are i mean it's it's not just barstool it's i mean that's like the whole storyline parts and rec where like ben is so boring that he can't go ben like i think there's a lot like ben was going to be an accountant for an accounting firm out of the fucking firm of accountants you're the boring guy

i think it's a regular thing i think that's where i got it from not you're the boring guy and so i think it's a regular thing and i think that's where i got it from not you but the um the uh she gets it i knew he was rich i knew he had women who wanted to fuck him but he fucked people and i i think there's there's that but that's always that's out of sight out of mind probably and then all of a sudden 20 years later this documentary comes out and it's not it's not like he was doing anything bad, but all the headlines are like, Scott Burrell fucked and partied. You would prefer, like you said,

you would prefer just that to not be the case. I think it's like, if it was him in a club with girls like that, I wouldn't want to see that. Like, MJ Buckingham's balls off being out at clubs. Yeah, I fucking figured you were out at clubs. It's not why it's it's like it's all the fucking stuff we say with ray rice where it's like there's there's a difference between knowing

it and knowing it yes and this you still don't know this you just know you knew it the whole time well but that's funny because one of her comments when they did an interview uh she said first of all it was like once or twice with Michael which means there was a conversation that was had at home right? well it was once or twice with Michael she said that too like her SNY

anchor was like so Janae are you like what do you think and she was like first of all it was only like one or two times that he ran with them so that means there was a conversation at home and that means that's what he told her like yo babe I don't know babe it just happened like one or two times that he ran with them. So that means there was a conversation at home, and that means that's what he told her. Like, yo, babe, I don't know, babe. It just happened like once or twice. And then she said the line, I just find it hilarious.

And I was like, no, you don't. Anytime a girl says that, she does not find it hilarious. It's also one of those things, though, where like it probably wouldn't be a big deal unless the world made it a big deal. Like if she just heard that herself in a vacuum, she's like gives it like i know you i know you want michael jordan team but when she's getting 10 000 tweets yeah it's like now you're gonna make you you've infiltrated my head and now i have to be mad about this because everyone's telling me i have to be mad about this that's exactly it it's like the world's telling me to be upset. Her SNY anchor co-host tweeted her like, are you okay?

So she was like, I appreciate the concern. So when people are reaching out like, oh my God, are you all right? It's like, oh fuck. Well, yeah, you're an asshole. You're in the doghouse. You know what I mean? But either way, even if it's just a friendly like, you know, busting balls and you got to explain your way out of it. And it's not a huge deal, which I'm sure it's just a friendly like you know busting balls and you got to explain your way out of it and it's not a huge deal which i'm sure it's not it's got to be funny to be like

you had to like that documentary you could have just easily left those 10 seconds out and no one knows or cares and instead it's a whole thing in your house every single day for fucking 22 years scott bros been like god thank god that fucking footage where i told michael right i'm an alcoholic didn't come out right today he's watching today's the day uh let's do a little mi the asshole it's brought to you by cuts clothing uh i'm rocking the cuts right now these shirts they come in uh henley's they come in t's long sleeve t's and they all have different uh different bottoms. I love this little logo, by the way.

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slash KFC. Get your discount from the only shirts worth wearing at Cuts Clothing. Lead us off with a little Am I the Asshole, Donnie. This one was tweeted at us. I haven't even read it. It does appear to be quite long.

We're going to give it a go. If someone tweeted at us and said we'd like this one, then let's see it. Am I the asshole for asking my wife where she wants the door of her raised garden to be? What? My wife drops $1,000 on a semi-pre-fabricated garden bed kit.

About a month later, it finally arrives and my son-in-law and I get ready to assemble it. I ask you to show me where she wants it and we decide on a fairly level piece of ground. I will need to rototill and level it. Fucking good for me for nailing rototill and level it, and then build the garden, looking at a long day of physical labor for this fat old man. I'm already annoyed that I've wasted over two hours in the morning trying to pick up the rototiller I reserved online that no one could find, even though the website showed two in stock. I ended up having to drive an hour and a half to another

store with 100 people in line to get in. Fortunately, I was able to get the gatekeeper that transferred pickup order and I got it home in 10 minutes. A little Shakespearean. Back home, already past noon, finished assembling the rototiller. Asked the wife to show

me how she wants the garden situated, where she wants to be able to enter. Okay, show me where you want where you want the door wife i want the corner to be over here the corners don't matter tell me which side you want the door on and i can lay it out but i want the corners to be the corners do not matter what matters is where you want the door so i can lay it out like you don't understand i need the corners to be for the last fucking time it does not matter where you want the corner it's all built around the door the door is the critical component just show me which direction you want the goddamn door or while the daughter appears to defend her mother dad not everyone thinks like you she's trying to tell you how she wants it this is not

rocket science she shows me where she wants the door, the rest will fall into place. All I need to know is where she wants the door. Team up about me being unreasonable and not listening. Steam coming out of ears.

Which part of show me where you need the fucking door do you not understand? I don't care anymore. Just do it whatever way you want. You never listen. Just go do it however you want. Consider tossing my 25-foot tape measure at the wife of Reconsider. Men are in their shoes, and women folk decide the correct course of action is to go shopping.

Left me my own devices, I determine the door shall be here, and stake it out in an area and break out the laser-type measure. T's and L's and make right-angle spikes and all kinds of shit. I was handing it back. The area has been tilled, and the pieces have all been laid out. My son-in-law has placated the three- and six-year-old to the point

he can actually help work on the garden and much progress it had made. Womenfolk return from their shopping trip, walk over to where we're working, find nothing to disapprove of, and go back inside. Okay. This is awesome. Because this is relationships.

This is marriage, right here. The rototiller, the corners, the door, the thousand dollar garden, all of it. Because first of all, this guy wants no fucking part of any of this. He doesn't want the garden. He doesn't care about the garden.

He probably certainly doesn't want to spend $1,000 on the garden. He just wants to get his son. I think, though, I think he is the asshole. I think he is, too, because guess what? I don't understand why the corners don't help well that too i'm going to tell you i'm taking him at his word uh that the door is what matters because i don't get any of this i'm not sure but even if he's right and the door is what matters there's a difference between being correct and being the asshole and he might there's a difference between being correct and being the asshole. And he might,

there's a million times where you are going to be logically, especially as a man, a zillion times, you will be logically correct by asking that question or looking for that piece of information or doing X, Y, Z, but you're wrong in her eyes.

And that's just going to be a nightmare for you. So you are the asshole. If your wife is like, I want the corners and you just keep bashing your head against the wall, asking for the door, you're asking for it. You're, you're, you're just causing your own problems. Just, just put the corners. I don't, I still don't even understand what we mean, but just give her the corners. Just say, okay, corner here, corner there, and just put the door where you want. I don't know. But when you're going against your wife's grain that much, no matter how right you are, you're wrong, and it's only going to be a problem for you. Yeah, I'm very much the wife in this situation where I'm like, I don't know. I congratulated

myself on pronouncing Roto-Tiller. So that's where my knowledge of all of this is. So if I was the wife, I'd be like, all right, fine, fucking put it here. I would have answered, because I just not wanted to do it. I don't know, fucking put it there. Whatever. It seems like this is important to you. Door there.

But he did a bad job of explaining because I still don't get... If I said I want the four corners here, like, I feel like, but think about it. It's like, if,

if, if there's a garden, there's four fucking corners, but there's some sort of door to get into it. You'd be like, okay, like, all right,

the corner is going to be there, but do you want the door on the East side, the West side? Do you want to open in or out? And that sounds like the much more important factor or to this guy. I could see him being like, answer this question first. But also, sometimes it's like, you're going to get in the, like I said, I don't think this guy gives a fuck about the garden. So why are you getting yourself worked up? Like sometimes I feel like you'll be involved in the project because of your significant other.

Or you have to go shopping for something that you don't really care about. And you end up taking an interest in it just because that's human nature. And all of a sudden you're fighting over something that you don't care about at the end of the day. So just remind yourself, like, 36 hours ago, I didn't even think about this garden. So why fight over the fucking door or the corners in the first place? Also, if you're dealing with a garden, I just feel like there's only one place to put the door. Because they're usually in the

corner, right? Can I be honest? I don't know what a... What do you mean door to a garden? I don't know. But like... Like a door that you walk into? I guess so, yeah. Fenced off.

Gardens get fenced off so animals don't eat the fucking... Okay. Okay. I was thinking of like pieces of wood in like a square, like a sandbox almost. That's what I was thinking of, like the corners, not like the... It's 12 by 6. What's the size here? Oh, man.

We're so funny. It's 18 by 12 feet. So I just picture it as like one of those little gardens in the corner of a yard that, like, you grow tomatoes in. You have a garden. But, like, it's in the corner yard. So there's two places the door can't be. And then you put it on the skinny side. There's only one place.

If I tell you where I want one corner, you should be able to figure out where I want the rest. Yeah. There's only one place to do it. If I tell you where I want one corner, you should be able to figure out where I want the rest. Yeah. But the problem is, and this extends well beyond construction projects with gardens, girls will get mad at you for being like the guy who never makes a decision. You know, you always like, it's always what I, I always have to answer. I always have to pick. It's always what I want.

And then the one time that you do pick, you're in trouble because it was wrong. So I guarantee this guy would be like, all right, okay, you want the corners there? I'll put the door on the left side. And she'd be like, why did you do that? Why don't you put it on the right side? Like, I don't – well, you should have fucking told me. I also – but I also feel if I'm ever doing anything active'm if i'm ever like moving something or doing any kind of blue car label blue blue collar work i'm the asshole because i'm already in asshole mode because i'm mad i'm doing it yeah so i'm going to be an asshole outwardly right i'm not i'm moving this

couch i'm mad i'm moving this i'm mad i'm digging this trench. I'm mad. I'm shoveling this snow. I'm angry that I'm doing something that I don't want to be doing. So I'm already in asshole mode. And if you come at me with absolutely anything, you're an asshole back at you. When my dad would be doing handiwork, we all knew, like, steer clear. Oh, shit. Dad's working on the fucking plumbing.

Like, let's just go out for the day Cause he's going to probably beat us later. Yeah. I'm like, when I'm doing anything physical, it's not often, but if I'm doing something, I'm like a, uh,

I'm like a, a gas station where the truck has crashed into one of the tanks. So gasoline is spilling. And then the gas are filling up the air. So if you're lighting a match within a mile of this place, it's dangerous. Boom. Yep. It's not a short fuse.

The fuse has become aerified and is now just a distant sound could fucking make this explode. So I'm the asshole. All right. Let's go number two here. We got three good ones for you. Did it close on me? Hope I liked it. Um, you know what? This is not the one I was going to do, but this is funny. Uh, this is,

this is from Reddit relationships. Not necessarily. Am I the asshole? My girlfriend said that she would shave her head if I grew a mullet. I did. She shaved her head. Now we're both not happy. So about six months ago, I jokingly said I was going to grow out a mullet. She was repulsed by the idea. So I felt like I needed to do it because it would be funny, right? So already being an asshole. I kept talking about it, and I stopped getting regular haircuts. She noticed this and said that she would cut all of her hair if I did it. She had long, curly hair down to her waist at the time and was in love with it. She knew that I was not into short hair at all, so she jokingly said that she would turn herself into an egghead.

Well, I thought this would be a fantastic long-term prank on her. We've been together for three years now, so I didn't think it would really be a problem and it would just be funny. I knew that I could just cut my hair and get rid of it. I was only planning on keeping it for a day anyways because I didn't want one. It was just a joke. Two days ago, I decided to go through with it. I cut myself and I had a full on Kentucky waterfall. She came over after work and saw it in all its glory. I got the reaction I was expecting. She was repulsed.

It was hilarious. She left soon after and seemed genuinely distressed. I felt terrible about it. We walked, we talked that night, just small talk. Everything seemed normal. I planned on fixing it the next morning before she arrived as we had to go out for a hike. The next morning she arrived, full-blown egghead. She did it.

She shaved it all off. She said that she was not happy I changed my hair without talking to her first, and she wanted to give me a taste of my own medicine, shaved it off like she joked about in the past. So here I am, mulletulletless with my bald girlfriend. She didn't think how easily fixable my mullet was while hers is not. We argued for a while about it. She's absolutely hysterical and saying that her cutting her hair off was my fault. I'm completely stuck. I thought it was just a joke, but now she's saying that I need to pay for a high-end wig, which will cost about $2,000, money I don't have, or that she will break up with me.

We've been together for so long, and I can't imagine throwing it away over something like this. What the fuck do I do? You fucking throw it away for something like this. This is, you throw this away, and you fucking, you throw this away, one of those things on trash day. You put it right on the street. You don't fucking leave it. You don't even let this hang out in the kitchen.

You don't let it hang out in the backyard for a bit. You throw this right onto the fucking street. Like in the movies, like an Indian ghetto or whatever, where they just throw shit out the window. That's what it is. As the garbage truck drives by, you just throw it in and you pull the lever that compresses it into the truck.

You put this shit in the goddamn garbage. It's a fucking wrap. Both of you are assholes. Everybody's an asshole here. I don't think he's an asshole. He's not great. He's not great. To be like, you want it to be a funny prank? It's not a funny prank.

It's a one-night prank. That's a little fucking funny. Like, everyone does that when they cut their hair. Oh, like, if I'm going to buzz it, oh, I shaved into a mohawk. Yeah. Right, then you finish it off. Yeah. That's some shit guys have done fucking since we were kids.

You cut your hair a little goofy, and then you fix it right away. Ladies, you don't realize that you can't do this? You needed to see a fucking doctor or scientist to tell you that, oh, you can fix a mullet pretty quickly by just shaving it like the rest of the fucking head. It's such an easy fix and it's so, it's

crazy to fly off the handle that fast, to go home. Hair to your waist, Kevin. Those girls put their hair to their shoulders. Hair to your waist, Kevin. Those girls put their hair to their shoulders. So your waist, that's like you've been working on your whole fucking life. You're fucking Rapunzel.

And you're going to convict that shit? She's 22. That means that she has been growing her hair. Since she had control of her own haircuts, she has never had one. No, for sure. Maybe one those like little trims or whatever they get those split ends but like that's some shit you've been cultivating

for your life that's your identity and because your boyfriend has an easily fixable haircut you're gonna fly off the handle and shave it not just not cut it shave it egghead pick it fucking put some barbasol on your head and fucking power wash all the hair follicles off because your boyfriend got a silly haircut for a night?

You're a lunatic. You're an absolute nut job, and I can't stand this one. Preach, King. Go off, King. Just kick that bald bitch to the curb and be like, Good luck finding a new boyfriend with your fucking egghead i'm gonna be over here with my totally normal haircut finding a normal ass girl i finally shaved this fucking bullshit facial hair i have i'm gonna do it in funny ways yeah

i got this little thing for a little bit and this little thing for a little bit and guess what by the time i'm seen in public never mind right. It's going to be gone and I'm going to look normal. Don't lose your fucking mind because I had a joke for a second. Speaking of facial hair, before we get to the last semi, the asshole, I went out and I bought a bunch of beard stuff. I saw that. I mean, I'm going to use it. I used it the past couple days, but I know after a week, that's going to go.

What does it do? I don't know. One is a growth serum. It's like an oil that you put in there. It's supposed to make it grow. One is an oil that's supposed to make it soft. Then one is like it looks like lip balm.

It's like a tin, and it's hard. It's like waxy almost. It looks like you would rub your finger on it and then put it on your lip, and you're supposed to rub it in your hands. It's really supposed to be for guys who have a fucking beard. But I put it in now. It feels like I have wax on my face or whatever. But I'm into the idea of like, all right, I'm a beard.

I'm going to have a beard now. I'm going to make it soft and like nice, but I know, I know I'm going to never use this shit. And then there was also capsules that promote beard growth that smell terrible. And I took two of them. And every time I like burped,

I would like taste it. I'm done. If that's, if that's the cost of having like a real beard, I'm not taking, it's like the fish oil capsules. No fucking thank you. Last asshole and then we'll get into our voicemails.

What do we got? All right. Am I the asshole for being annoyed by my girlfriend's zest for life? My girlfriend, 29, is a very lovely and energetic person. But sometimes her behavior is really annoying for me, 33. She wants me to share her joy for little meaningless things up to five times a day. It's tiring. Yesterday we went on a hike and she was constantly admiring nature.

The grass has reached an impressive height. All right, fuck off. I wasn't going to be. I was going to be. I mean, if you're done, the grass has reached an impressive height. Yeah, but fuck off. Fuck off. These ducks have babies look three

nature is healing my soul look at this panorama breathtaking she was obviously having the time of her life i get it there is a duck there is some green grass and some hills but the hills are not that impressive and you can literally see them everywhere in our area she made three or four comments about nature and it always included some imperative look but i wanted to exercise and get the hike done as quickly as possible i know exactly where her behavior comes from comes from her family does the same look james the tit found a nest in our tree these people are british so obviously they say things like tit and fat yeah yeah yeah um mary look how delicious your cake and cunt uh mary look how delicious your cake and Mary, look how delicious your cake glazing turned out to be delicious. I'm so tired of looking. I'm so tired of it.

I don't want to give her that attention. And the mean and the mean thing she is pointing out don't make me happy. They mean nothing to me. So I guess I was being rude, telling her telling her please please let me walk in peace and stop asking me to admire all this stuff i don't want to she didn't take it well and we ended up being quiet for the rest of the hike i didn't want to silence her i'm sorry and apologize but she was angry i i am sorry i said sorry god these people suck at writing i am sorry and apologize but she was angry and avoiding me in our apartment she She said, so what else am I supposed to talk about? I think she got me wrong.

Am I the asshole? No, this guy is not the asshole. If there was different examples, if this girl was being a little more reasonable and you were just being like a fucking down in the dumps, Debbie Downer, pessimistic bag of shit like I am, then you're the asshole. You know what sold me? That one line, I'm so tired of looking. I'm so tired of it because that means this man has not been an asshole for a long time. That means for years, he's probably been like, wow, the grass really has grown to an impressive length. And he probably has always really gone out of his way to like, oh yeah, honey, that's incredible. And now he's just at his wits fucking end. He doesn't care about the

grass. He doesn't care about the hills. He doesn't care about the fucking whatever. And I think that sometimes opposites attract. I think that it's good to have a girlfriend that maybe brings you up a little bit. Like I always think of Sebastian Maniscalco's wife. He always talks about his wife and his act on Instagram. And you know him. He's this like cynical asshole. And she's always very friendly and outgoing. And I feel like they balance each other out.

They have this beautiful relationship because of it. I think if you can find that, awesome. But if you're just flat out opposites in this regard i don't think anybody's the asshole i just don't i don't you guys are not a good fit you just shouldn't be together it's it's one of those things it's i i try and do it and get because it it's it's like i i'm tired of looking it means nothing to me i get it yeah i just want it to. I'm trying to fake it until you make it. I guess one day you probably do come up

with it. You snap on it. It's like fake it until you make it has been given forever. It's in the Bible. It's said differently, but it's in the Bible. It says... What does the Bible say?

Act as if ye have faith, and faith shall be given, I believe. I like that. Typical snake until you make it. I love it. I'm interested in those things a lot. Sometimes there are things I'm genuinely interested in. But other times, you're like, I don't care about that.

I want to see the beauty of it. I want to see all that stuff. I just don't. and to make me have to is like forcing someone to watch a show they don't want to watch or go somewhere they don't want to go it's like that's fine for you just don't expect it from me the grass grows to an impressive length fuck out of here come on this is kind of the first one where i think the first one is that they're both assholes this one i think there's no asshole here so i don't think you should have to quiet down what brings you joy you're like you're like wow this is fucking awesome look at

this then just get a new find a boyfriend who likes the grass when you hike and you gotta find a girl who's a little i don't even think you have to break up like i don't think it's something to break up over be like i'd be like look i don't care and that something to break up over. I'd be like, look, I don't care. You have to temper your expectations to my caring about how high grass is. And if that's fucking wondrous to you, awesome. I think you should – I don't care what excites you. If that makes you happy, fucking great. Right.

I don't know. Maybe call a friend about it. Or just don't demand that I have to love it too. Right. I don't need to be happy to love it too. Right. Exactly. He talked to me about it. And I'm like, yeah, that's pretty cool. But I can't shake your enthusiasm. I want to so badly.

But I don't have it for you here. Can't fake it. And I also – he clarified that the hills are visible from everywhere. So that made it one thing. But if you're on a fucking real hike and you are seeing things things that like you you don't see you haven't seen before yeah that shit's that shit's right you're gonna remark on it you're gonna be like you fucking if you're on top like when i go skiing like you hit the top of the mountain like fuck look at this this is amazing yeah if you're like yeah i get it keep going like did you beat a dick like yeah then

don't go on the fucking hike if you're not going to be impressed by any of it. That's the whole fucking point. Let's get into our voicemails today. They are brought to you by Crossrope. Now, Johnny's been skipping rope. Johnny's been trying to stay healthy. He's doing a little jump rope here, and that's what Crossrope is.

They are, you know, I mean, right now, you can't go to the gym. You don't have access to your big cardio machines. You can't be running. You can't really even be outside. If you're going to run, you got to worry about it. So what better way to stay in shape indoors without having to break the bank or have a big piece of machinery that takes up space in your apartment than doing a little jump rope? Let me tell you about these jump ropes.

I have done this every single day since I got them. They're fucking awesome. You adjust the handles, and you get the ropes in different weights. So it's like you got a quarter-pound weight. I believe it's a quarter-pound weight, a half-pound weight, a one-pound weight, a two-pound weight. And then you have daily challenges where it's like, you can do,

it'll be like, all right, do 30 seconds with this weight and then rest for 30 seconds. And then do 30 seconds with this weight and then do some pushups and then do some squats. It's fucking, it takes every, I'm doing the jump sweat challenge with, and like every,

every workout was like 17 to 20 minutes and it's fucking awesome. I can't say enough good things about these. I am willing to do these. They're great for quarantine, but I will be doing these every morning for the rest of my life. It's so quick, and it wakes you up. I can't go to the gym in the morning, but I can jump rope in the morning. I can't lift weights. I can jump rope.

This is such an easy kickstart to the day. I can't say enough good things. I strongly recommend getting the cross rope. This big black one, this is some heavy shit. We're not talking about like, oh, you're just going to have to skip rope for like 1,000 hours to get in any sort of workout. The heavy one is a weighted rope that you're going to feel the burn on. And then this one is – Not just feel the burn on it, Kevin.

You'll also feel it on your fucking feet. Because guess what? When you fuck up, that thing smacks you in the toe and it hurts like a son of a bitch. A little more incentive to make sure you do it right. I incentivize to not screw up jumping rope with a two pounder. But it's easy. Look at this. You just, you pinch this button here and the rope disconnects.

So if you want to switch handles to the heavy one, the light one, you're good to go. Um, and I mean, it's, it's a great workout. It's easy. All you need is a little bit of space and a little bit of time and you get your burn in. So it's the perfect way to, uh, get your cardio up while still being in quarantine. Yikes. Uh, so try out some new cardio and a full home body workout. Like John said, you're doing more than just jumping rope. You're doing at home body weight, high intensity, full body strength training. And right now they got a 60 day guarantee and you can get up to $40 off your cross rope sets. Plus free shipping when you go to cross rope.com slash KFC.

That's cross rope.com slash KFC. That's crossrope.com slash KFC. Get $40 off your crossropes plus free shipping and a 60-day risk-free guarantee while you hit your fitness goals. Voicemails. Let's go. It's $40. And the workout challenges are so good. And it's so funny, too, because I'm on like a 22-day challenge right now.

And I could stop and no one would know. The workout challenges are so good, and it's so funny, too, because I'm on a 22-day challenge right now. I could stop and no one would know, but once you throw that challenge thing in there, your mind is like, I got to do this every day now. You're hooked. I'm on day 10 of my 22-day challenge. Come see me after 22. I'll probably be shredded as shit. Crossrope.com slash KFC.

Nick, what do we got? KFC 5 Super Producer. I've been watching Joe Exotic, and I just wanted to know if you guys could have one animal that would listen to you, protect you, do whatever you wanted, what animal would you choose? I think a bald eagle. Oh, great answer. I think if I could summon a bald eagle and he would appear – because I feel like – have you ever seen a bald eagle? Have I ever seen a bald eagle? I don't believe so. Right.

Right. It's like – and if you did see one, wouldn't you be like, oh, shit, it's a fucking bald eagle, and it's our country and our – It might be a moderately sized bird. I'm going to say that's a bald eagle. Definitely. If it's a little bit bigger than a crow, it's a bald eagle. But if you could be like, cuckoo, and all of a sudden, like, here comes Baldi. And he's just flapping his wings.

And he just flies and lands on my arm. And he's got that bald head. And you can be like, yeah, this is my best friend. And, yeah, he's also got talons and you can be like, yeah, this is my best friend. And like, and yeah, he's also got talons and will rip your fucking face off if you mess with me. But more importantly, I don't need him to protect me or do anything. I just need him to show

up as like my literal wingman and be like, bam, I'm the bald eagle whisperer, bitch. That's a fucking really, really good answer. Maybe I think the only thing I can think of outside of that would be like a whale or a dolphin.

Yeah, a dolphin. If I was, but I don't know if a dolphin can hold me. You're underestimating dolphins. They're like a thousand pounds. They can hold you. I mean, they can probably hold me, but I don't think I would like the visual comparison of me and a dolphin.

He's about the same size. You know, like how girls like to be like, oh, I'm so tiny. Yeah. When it comes to fucking marine mammals, I like to be tiny. I love it. Yeah, make me feel small. What if you had two dolphins that roll up and you're almost like standing on them like water skis? I love it. Yeah, make me feel small. You could have two. What if you had two dolphins that roll up and you're almost, like,

standing on them like water skis? Oh, I'd fuck with that. Yeah, that'd be cool. I just think, like, if I had an orca and I could, like, Khaleesi that bitch. Yeah. Just, like, on the back of it. Like, fucking.

I don't know. Like, just. I would just chill on the beach. What is Fights On out there? Is that, like, a small island? Like, no no he's just chilling on his orca i like that plenty of people would be like dogs i want to talk to my dog or whatever we're going to the air and we're going to the to the ocean right i was actually gonna avoid the ocean because it does obviously limit your time to be able to use this animal it's like aquaman but i don't know you're

there it's awesome right and i don't want to be responsible for an animal the whole time so it's actually pretty nice i'm just just when i'm at the beach or when i'm at sea do i have a pet otherwise i'm left to my own devices could you imagine if if by the way like everyone always talks about i wish i could talk to my dog what if what if your dog could talk and like you don't like him what if you have a family dog and all of a sudden he talks and he's an asshole who's remarking on how tall the grass is and you're like, I don't fucking like this guy anymore. So be careful

what you wish for, you know? He's got this racist ass fucking dog. He's barking at the mailman again. No, I'm barking at the black guy. I don't know what a fucking mailman is. I know what a black man is, not a mailman. I'm barking at the black guy. I don't know what a fucking mailman is. I know what a black man is, not a mailman. I'm black. I'm barking at him. Let's, let's do one more voicemail and we'll do last voicemail today before we get into Duncan,

because it's an awesome interview. It's brought to you by Kendra Scott. I got three Kendra Scott gifts. This is how they arrive. Take a look. If you're watching the video, it's this yellow, beautiful box with this white ribbon. And you know what? Even though it's all perfect right here, I'm going to open it up to show you some of the beauty that Kendra Scott's rocking with here. You got one of the necklaces I got. It's a big – I got a necklace and two sets of earrings. Yeah, they got it all.

They got necklaces. They got – yeah, these are going to be the earrings, I think. They've got necklaces. They've got – yo, this is a pendant. This is like a necklace with like the charm. Yeah, that's the necklace I got. It's got a little turquoise thing. Yeah, that's the one.

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And the girlfriend of my buddy says, hey, can this girl come over? Those were just hanging out. I said, yeah, sure, that's fine, whatever. Didn't know her. So she comes over, hangs out. And like 15 minutes in, my friend invited her and says,

hey, Brittany, tell that story about how you sucked all those dicks at one time. And this girl goes on to tell me that she sucked seven dicks in one night at a high school party on a lawn chair underneath the deck. So I just want to get your guys' thoughts. What number would you want to be in the dick-sucking line, I guess? Well, you want to be number one on the dick-sucking line. I think that's pretty fucking clear. Jesus Christ. Now, this actually ties in perfectly to what we were saying about Scott Burrell.

You know, are you allowed to be mad about this, John? Wait, he says his girlfriend? It was, what was it, Nick? It was a girl at the apartment. I think it was his buddy's girlfriend or something. But let's say it's, you know, a girl you're dating, a girl you're seeing, whatever. You know, it happened in the past. It was not while I was with you.

It's not who I am anymore. I'm not going to be able to go to sleep at night knowing that you once sucked seven dicks in a party there's a fucking humongous difference between you went to a club and you sucked seven dicks I know I'm just saying that there are that you can't use

there are probably people though who would take the defense you provided for Scott Burrell and they're using it for themselves when they suck seven dicks at a party and it's like that's something that kind of speaks to, you know, who you are and your character. And even if it doesn't, even if you were just like, yo, I'm an angel. I just had a crazy night.

I'm sorry. I've never done it again. I'll be honest. That's just, I'm not going to be able to get over that. I will always be thinking about how you suck seven dicks at a party. And even if that's not you and you totally changed, I can't get over that. I'm sorry. No, 100%.

That's crazy. But I didn't catch the girlfriend part. Yeah. Nick, what was the story there? Was that just a random girl at a party? It was a girlfriend's friend. That's funny then. I wish I had a girlfriend's friend like this because then it's always just someone to make fun of.

Yes. I still have seven dicks. That is. I mean, every time. Could you imagine? I would never not bring that up. Be like, let's go to McDonald's. Hey, you want a number seven?

Like everything. Like what time is Jeopardy on? Seven o'clock. Everything. I would be mentioning how you suck seven dicks nonstop, always. Yeah, I mean, you need anything in the kitchen? I'll take a beer, but no thanks on the seven dicks.

Yo, that is... If your girlfriend wants to be able to have her friends over the house at all times, suck seven dicks once in your life so I can make fun of it all the time. This is, what a turn this is.

If it was my girlfriend, you're right. There's nothing, we're never getting over this. I don't think anything less of you. Well, I guess I kind of do because I don't want to be with you. You definitely do. And it's not, maybe it's not fair. Maybe you want to call it slut shaming. I don't know what you want to call it.

And maybe that's true. All I know is I can't be – I can't date you. That's right. I mean, you just can't. If I fucking was under the porch one night and ate seven vaginas, you should dump me because that's a crazy thing to do. And I'd be thinking, like, did you swallow all of them? Where did they – I mean, I'd be thinking, did you swallow all of them? I'd have so many questions.

If it's my girlfriend's best friend, complete game changer. I'm going to pay my girlfriend's friend to go do this to seven random people just so I can have that just to make fun of it all the time. Seven is enough that

Asa Akira would be like damn girl like you put it in work that's a lot that's not just like whoa you had a crazy night in college that's like you probably should be in the business you should be in the industry because you're a fucking professional slut good for her i don't know i'm not gonna slut shame you're just not for me all right let's get into our interview with Duncan Trussell. Awesome interview. A plus stuff from a really cool guy who is very different from us. It's like opposites attract. And if you're sick of all our pessimism and me being old and jaded and bitter, this guy, Duncan, is a mind opener. And it was a really, really, really cool cool interview it's brought to you by screwball whiskey

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35 alcohol by volume all right let's dive right into it uh first of all this background you got is awesome duncan trussell's on the show and uh you'veiced it up for us. You're the first guest with a cool background. This is awesome. I know. What am I going to do? What am I going to do? Come on your show with some shitty background? It's because I'm embarrassed, honestly. The paint in my studio. We just moved in the studio. It's named Quack Quack. They left

a name of paints on the fridge in case we needed it. The literal name is Quack Quack and it's Cheeto Orange. It's bad. And it's not my place, so I didn't want to convey to people that I completely lost my mind during the pandemic, which is why I decided I'd do an oceanic background. I kind of like Cheeto.

The backgrounds have become such a clear thing. Like, look, my apartment is just pretty messy. So I'm going to put, like, the background from the office behind me. When you're on, like, the Zoom calls and the Zoom meetings, you're like, oh, I know, you're is just pretty messy. So I'm going to put like the background from the office behind me. When you're on like in like the Zoom calls and the Zoom meetings, you're like, oh, I know you're just still in bed. That's why you have a background. Listen, y'all are the right doing the right thing. Clearly, I'm insecure. Like that's going to be the thing.

If we stay locked down forever, the backgrounds are going to be an indication of like someone's like something's off. Why don't you just show what's behind you, man? Who cares? There was a newscaster today who got caught wearing shorts he had the he had the shirt uh shirt and tie with the jacket but then you could just see like a little a little bit of his thighs and everyone thought he didn't have pants on i can't knock that off come on whatever this is what i love about this is we're all seeing that we're human. You know, the whole thing that we are trying to do. I don't even know what the thing the news was trying to do.

Like they were mutating into these robotic beings. And all of a sudden it's like, holy shit, the guy's legs are pale. The guy who's doing the news, he's got pale legs. Thank God. Me too. I'm happy right now to have been able to, you know, we're stuck at home and everyone's binging and watching new stuff. Midnight Gospel is, I mean, I don't even fucking know the words, man. I want to be overdramatic and call it, like, revolutionary. I think it's fucking brilliant, dude.

Thank you. Thank you so much. How would you describe it? Like what's your kind of elevator pitch to try to capture exactly what you're doing for the people who haven't seen it yet? Well, the real, real easy way to describe it, which I don't think does it justice, is if you took – if you replace the dialogue with Indiana Jones with podcast dialogue is the long and short of it. That was like the seed idea. Yeah, that's pretty cool. That's it. But then you're picturing Indiana Jones, which it isn't.

It's a very psychedelic show that had this team of just genius artists that all wanted to work with Pendleton. And so we had these amazing animators who all just poured their soul into the thing and created this very psychedelic, beautiful. And I, when I, I'm not patting myself on the back cause I'm not a, I'm a podcaster, I'm a comic. So I can say it's beautiful. And I can tell you the reason it's beautiful visually is not because of me. It's because I didn't get too involved in that department, you know? But yeah, it's, I,'t get too involved in that department you know but uh yeah it's it i you know i'm still so lucky netflix let us like sit in a room and describe this to them

and show them a three-minute animatic and then they gave us eight episodes and rolled the dice on this thing you know they really rolled the dice we didn't know if people would respond to it and we're so thrilled that people love it because we were afraid we didn't know if people would respond to it and we're so thrilled that people love it because we were afraid we didn't know man there's no precedent there's like waking life and stuff but we didn't know how people would take it a three minute pitch sounds like short and it sounds like they took a leap but within three minutes you know you're watching something different you're watching something that you really it's hard it's funny because i i always describe myself as someone who doesn't really like cartoons that much but then i watch a cartoon and i love it so i think i just don't give myself

the chance like i love big mouth i love uh midnight gospel i love rick and morty and it was just for so long i just i wasn't used to watching cartoons so i just said i don't really like cartoons sure and i feel like there's almost been a wave of revolutionary very different cartoons and i was like oh this is i watched all eight episodes and it actually is hard to binge because it is so dense that the topics are so so heavy um but i did i've gotten through all eight and they're all so amazing and so interesting so different but one of them i had a question for you on episode three i believe I believe it is, with the magician. I'm very anti-magicians. And that was one that was hard for me to get through.

You mean you're anti-stage magicians or anti-ceremonial magic? They rubbed me the wrong way. I don't – is there ever a time when you're listening to a podcast guest, because it does seem like you get so deep with all of them. Yeah. Where you're like, all right, dude, fuck off. Okay. Hold on. Hold on.

Let me stop you. I may have misheard you. Wait, what of the world you don't like? The what of the world? Criss Angels. Okay. Gotcha. This I get.

And I think that's a legit thing to have a just sense of like, I'm not really into that, man. Like the type of magic Eccles practices, of course, is not like stage magic. It's more like a religion. It has nothing to do with sleight of hand or anything like that. And more to do with communicating with hyper dimensional entities to try to get information into this realm to like improve the world or do whatever it is he's interested in doing that ceremonial magic or high magic which is what he practices so and you know what you're saying as far as guests go you know you know as well as i do y'all do this it's like terrifying that someone's gonna come into your show and suddenly

you get a whiff of something weird or there's some like you know like there's nothing worse than like when comics are trying to be super funny and shit or you get the feeling they're doing their gags instead of being with you yeah so so you know with all of people like damien or like anytime i've had someone on where there's attached to them something like well this guy just wrote a book on how to practice magic in the sense, in the religious sense or the spiritual sense. There's always a piece of me that's like, oh boy, who, who am I letting into my house? What's going to happen? And with Eccles in particular, it was, I was so relieved to realize like, oh my God, this guy is amazing. Like he's so sweet and kind and not only that this is

me i'm a hippie this is the woo-woo part he's got a vibe man like the guy like you feel it like the guy's charismatic and focused and you realize like shit this is actually a magician like what they talk about in movies sort of this is what i'm sitting in front of and thank god he's sweet because i'd hate to be around somebody like that if they didn't have good intentions well i mean you got a vibe i feel like duncan's got a vibe like thank you like we're probably it's all levels you know we're we're me and john are i don't know we're just like normal fucking assholes so we're so far removed from that so you're like our guy who has a vibe and even just in talking for a couple minutes i could tell like good good dude nice guy i like it i like the whole thing you're

putting out there man likewise you too look and also the thing you just did that's a classic thing magicians do i mean that's one of the first ways you tell like not most of them don't even want to be known by that name and i get it because it's cheesy it's silly it sounds silly and i get it silly magic what do you harry potter what do you ride around an owl or some shit what do you summon bats get the fuck out you're not but i get it but it's actually a really ancient ancient lineage and it's also something that we do most people do and don't even know they're doing it because they don't call it magic they just call it discipline they call it working out they call it getting better or connecting and y'all are most certainly high magicians, I'd say.

You just don't call yourselves that. And I don't blame you. What are you going to do? You didn't call yourself that? How much of your audience would you lose? I remember when they turned into magicians. Jesus Christ. Shut the fuck up.

When you have on a guest like that, do you do research or do you just kind of let them come in and teach you what they think? Like I was listening to so many episodes where I was like, how do you even research for this kind of thought where it's like, you almost, it's almost like you have to do a lifetime of research to be able to even get on a similar level of that person. Do you just come in,

do you let them come in and you just go student right away? Or do you have kind of a background knowledge of what they're saying? Well, it's, you know, case to case, I guess you'd say with like Dr. Drew, the first time I interviewed him, I was like, I went in there like a lawyer. I went in there like with a stack of why marijuana is not bad for you. Because for some reason I thought he was going to go anti-weed on me. And I was like, I had case studies. I had all these, it was so embarrassing. I came in there because I was afraid we'd get go anti-weed on me. And I was like, I had case studies. I had all these. It was so embarrassing.

I came in there because I was afraid we'd get in this awful arm wrestling match. And I feel so strongly about marijuana legalization. And then I realized, oh, he works with addicts. That doesn't mean that he's against any substance. He just doesn't want people to hurt themselves with drugs. And on his desk, he's studying medical journals for real and just trying to get the cutting edge data. And his opinion over our friendship is shifted drastically regarding marijuana, not because he's like smoking it or turning into a hippie or it's the age of Aquarius, but because there's more research coming out. And that data is showing that there are some uses for it. And so, you know, with him, I was pleasantly surprised because as it turns out, he not only is he not opposed to cannabis,

he just doesn't want he loves addicts and he want any like recognizes a strength in them. I think that's pretty sweet. You know, with any guests I have, I don't know them. I will spend a little bit of time researching them. And then in that space, I'll go full student, which means just opening myself up. So Dr. Drew is episode one, where you're talking about marijuana. And I went into this totally blind. I didn't understand what I was about to watch. And I heard it was a cartoon. And I thought it was like John said, something along the lines of Big Mouth or whatever.

And Dr. Drew starts talking. And it's very, I didn't realize I was listening to a podcast. So when I hear Dr. Drew talking very off the cuff and kind of stuttering and stammering the way that we all do when we have a conversation, I was like, wow, this is some pretty good like voiceover acting. This sounds incredibly natural. And then when i realized when i finally put it together this is just kind of like a an animated visual podcast and then when i when you've realized that and then you look at what the the cartoon characters are doing like there's so many levels to it so when you you have the conversation and then uh how much you have in in how much input you have on what the animation is and how do you come up with the idea of like, we're going to have him picking people off with a sniper rifle and crawling

on top of dogs and zombies are going to be eating houses and all that kind of shit. Cause that's what takes it to a whole new level. That what you just said sounds like one of our writing sessions. Like that's pretty much it. Like he's like, is there a way we can make him crawl over dogs? Can we put,

this is the beauty of animation because like trying to film someone crawling over a pile of dogs or something eating the white house forget it but animation you could do anything and the the what we did is we knew the show was going to be about clancy's malfunctioning multiverse simulator and we knew there was going to be apocalypse is happening and so we had two weeks where we just came up with ideas for how the world could end or some world could end.

What if there was a world that used meat instead of electricity to light shit and then what if there were terrorists who fucked that up and then the meat flies would come like in that city, if the meat stopped flowing, flies would come and then you just flies would come like in that city if like the meat stopped flowing flies would come and then you just sort of decode and unpack what that would look like if it fell apart and so

that we just came up with these beats for these you know journey the journey that clancy was going on with his guests and then we took the podcast dialogue and tried to attach it to those beats oh so you're doing you're doing all the animation ideas first and then applying podcast to it yeah that's it yeah we like we had a writing the opposite well thank you i mean anytime anybody any comment is like this seems like a podcast i feel like we did our job because it is a podcast but we didn't want that to be what we led with we we wanted it to feel like like a natural conversation that was happening and so but that was really challenging the way they we showed them three minutes on the roof the roof scene that was our

that was our proof of concept and with the president in 101 that's like three three minutes it's from the desk to when he goes on the roof and it's funny and it's cool. But then Netflix is like, yeah, well, let's do eight. And then it's like, shit, will this even work for 20 minutes? And that first episode was such a challenge, man, because we were having to really figure out how do you pin podcast dialogue to

madness and how do you do it in a way that doesn't uh conflict where the two can't it doesn't take away from it or like convoluted at all it's kind of it's separate and so different but also kind of is very like harmonious in a way which is i mean we we've we've experienced uh on a very different level we'll take a highlight from our podcast, we've experienced on a very different level. We'll take a highlight from our podcast and we've had someone animate it, but do it very literally. If John is telling a story about one time that he accidentally stole somebody's dog, we have the animation be him stealing a dog.

But the idea of taking it and being abstract with it is totally different. But at all, the audience always responded to that. There's something about animations and taking the audio and making it visual that it really hits home with people. And then you did it in such a different way that I think it's totally new. It's very cool. Thanks, man. Well, you know, podcasting, like look at what's happening right now. Somehow in the last six or eight minutes, I don't know how long we've been talking. We just feel like we're all hanging out. Like we're all feeling really relaxed and good with each other.

It's been 18. So it's been a lot, much longer than that. Oh yeah. And that's the other quality of podcasting is it's so much fun. Time just vanishes, but we could just as easily be sitting in one of our homes, getting hammered right now in the day yapping. And it feels like that. And people hear that, they hear that level of intimacy or connection. And so I think the challenge that all of us have had with podcasting is can it jump into another medium? How do you take this sort of like sloppy vulnerability that

sometimes becomes poignant, Usually it's pretty ridiculous. And then turn that into a show. And everyone's been, you know, the rainbow wheels have been spinning, trying to figure out how to do that. And without losing, you know, this, because you don't want to lose this. You don't want to lose the quality of like the stammers and the stumbles and the love, because this is what people are like. But that being said, you don't want to lose what's awesome about TV, which is that it can't be sloppy or weird like that. It needs to tell a story, you know.

And so I'm excited that we got to be a little piece of solving whatever the puzzle is on how to sort of merge mediums because people love podcasts. But, you know, how much do they love them? I mean, when I'm listening to a podcast, I'm usually doing something i'm cleaning i'm zoning in and out that's the other thing we wanted people to be able to like zone in and out we knew there's no i'm i've seen every episode hundreds of times and i still hear new shit in those episodes i never heard when i was talking to them you know so i we just wanted it to be like if you, if you want to learn about how to like,

how to do magic or lineages and Buddhism or whatever, great. But if you want to get blasted and melt into your couch and just watch pretty colors while hippies yap, you could do that too. What's up to you or both. You could go in and out if you feel like whichever. It's actually the, the perfect, I you said you look happy to be a piece but i think you're a huge piece because the you you touched on it with podcasts where they're often ridiculous occasionally accidentally poignant and i think cartoons is the perfect medium for that because somehow cartoons allow you to do things that are more real if that makes any sense at all where it's like you don't have to operate in actual

reality so you can get ridiculous and then almost more easily make your point like in episode one the point being made with like there's no such thing as a bad drug it's just a circumstance and then what happens once you turn into the zombies is like oh this is fucking beautiful like this nailed it this is so great and it would be so hard to do that with just actual people. So I think the marriage of podcasting and the cartoons just perfectly highlight the highlights of each other. Yeah, man. I mean, that was the crazy thing about it. It's like when you're merging with 120 people in an animation studio.

And I don't know if y'all have ever met animators, man, but these are like spaceship pilots. Like these people are like deep, deep,ist punk rock artists all they wanted they have they have like the art director has tattooed on his arm symbols the only animators would know it's like some kind you know it's like a masonic code but it's like animation notes tattooed on his arm. They're deep in it, man. So what starts happening is they start hearing things in the dialogue that maybe you didn't hear and pulling it out. Like you're saying, like creating moments that like, at least show their interpretation of what's being said. And, you know, sometimes when I'm watching it, I'm like, holy shit.

They're like kind of making fun of me right now. Like that was, you know what I mean? Like they're, they're exposing like things in me that I didn't want to admit, but it's obviously right there. That was pretty intense and awesome. And not just that, but you know, there's like all kinds of, in the Damien, in the Eccles episode, there's like people who are into magic for real or sending me images of like

magical symbols next to moments in the show i didn't say put that there i didn't say like put put the masonic triangle that represents uh moving through the stages of being a freemason in the i didn't do i had nothing to do with that but all but there it is who did it i don't know there's 120 people on the show you have an answer for this but is there anything like there's so much and so much in every episode is there anything that's random is there anything where they're like fuck it just put in an arm falling apart or a coffin becoming three coffins and something is there anything that doesn't have symbolism to it yeah man that's the that's the i'm so glad you asked that because that's the other freaking layer of the show that's cool you know that thing it's like you play pink floyd dark side of the

moon to wizard of oz yeah and it syncs up but then somebody i was talking to said yeah but if you play it to what's the name paul the mall cop what's his name paul paul blart mall. If you play to that, it also lines up. And it does. Google it. It's like, what the fuck? How is that possible? There's no way they were when they're doing the edit that they're playing Pink Floyd, Dark Side of the Moon. But it lines up. And so those happy accidents, they're in there, man.

And that's, to me, I don't know only because I'm not positive what we meant to have happen and what just happened. Well, because you also get to a point where the viewer is going to give you the benefit of the doubt all the time. It's like, once you've established that you're a very artsy, indepth guy they're gonna think this color means that and this means this and like sometimes it's just like i don't know man i fucking like purple so that's why i made it purple or i like cats so that's why you turn into a cat or you know and and then and that's where you just got to sit back and let it happen be like oh yeah yeah it was all intentional dude oh no you know what meaning dude yeah sure i think that's that see to me i think it's trippier to be like

i don't know man to me that because it's like you know that that that seems to be more like what happens when you're making stuff is like i don't know where it came from like i was in the shower had a weird idea i was blast on ketamine i saw like i saw meat rolling through tubes of some alien city. Where did I did that? Was that just my brain malfunctioning or did I tune into some part of the universe where that's really happening or somewhere in between? And then you mix everyone in and suddenly you've got like, you know, like tarot cards. Speaking of magicians, one thing that really annoys me is when someone zings out the tarot cards and they act like the cards are telling the future.

And inevitably when they do that, you're going to pull the death card and it's going to be awkward for everybody because it's like, oh, God, oh, no. But really, tarot cards are a reflection. They're reflecting you and you're seeing this shit that you don't want to really deal with usually in the tarot cards. So you look at the symbols in a tarot card. There's so many. Does it really mean anything? No. It's just some like, well, it does actually.

But what the interpretations are so infinite that you're just going to see yourself in it. And to me, I think Midnight Gospel, there's a piece of that in there, which is that you're going to see yourself in it to some degree. And I'm cool. I want it to be a Rorschach ink block test for people. I want it to be a way that you can maybe see shit that's inside of you that we didn't intend. That being said, we intended every single piece of it. I found myself a lot in the episode with Jason Lou, where you guys were talking about really I found myself a lot in the episode with Jason Lowe. Lou.

Lou. Where you guys were talking about really the giving up of hope and how that's like such a great stage of life. Where in a – it's like I think you said I'm no longer in the stage of my life where the Disney chipmunks are singing to me about hope. Yes. Yes. That's the spot to be right there. Okay. See, then you're a Buddhist.

That's a, that's, and, and that trying to get that idea across to people was tough, man, because I, I knew how I felt about the idea, but, but people on the show rightfully were like, listen, man, we have to be careful with this message because if it comes across that you're advocating for despair being the way to live, or if it comes across that you're advocating for despair being the way to live, or if it comes across you have what you want, whenever you've gotten everything you want, you do enter a place where you're not hoping for it anymore because you have it. And so those moments in life where I've been the most happy have been the most hopeless moments in the sense that hope isn't, hope is, I know I'm repeating the show, but I really believe it. Hope is, if you really analyze hope, there's a twinge of pain to it. And also if you're hoping, then you're probably not in the moment. If you're sitting with your

friends and they're hoping that they can be here or there, they're not with you and you can feel that. So that's what I meant by hopelessness. And I think hope is very rarely, at least in my life, ever used as hoping for a good thing. You're hoping a bad thing doesn't happen. So it's living in a fear rather than being like, look, whatever happens is going to happen and I'll just deal with it when that comes along. Yeah, hopelessness

is such an inherently viewed as a negative thing, but it really just kind of means you're not desiring other shit. That's cool with right now. It's very like But it really just kind of means you're not desiring other shit. Yeah. That's cool with right now. It's very like let go of it. All right.

Yeah. That that's that's what we're trying to get across. You know, like and this is, you know, Dante's Inferno on the gates of hell are written. Abandon all hope. You enter here. And the first time I read that, I was like, Jesus, that's the worst, saddest thing. Now I'm thinking, oh my God, that's the last help you get before you go into hell is that message, which is if you can be hopeless here, if you can let go of wanting to be out of this situation, you'll naturally get out instantaneously. And and and so that was you know on the gates of hell or the way to

get out of hell instantaneously it's on the gates of hell and it's also on the the stage as the strippers enter in the classic film boondock saints american cinematic classic boondock saints like my sophomore year of high school and my freshman year, and then I read Dante's Inferno my junior year, and I was like, oh, that's what they had. They got this movie from Boondock.

Dante, win the future and stole this. Boondock is for sure that movie. Every time somebody sees that movie, especially if they're like an Irish guy like me, they're like this is the best movie ever. It's a masterpiece.

And then later in life you're like, that movie fucking sucks. What's that movie about? What's the last sacrament you get? My confirmation name is Connor because it's a guy's name in Boondock Saints.

That's sweet. Speaking of psychiatrists, I hope I'm not bringing up a sore subject because I know your mother's passed away. So I'm sorry about that. Thank you. But your mom was a psychiatrist, and you do an episode with her, and it's in the show as well. So it's some very – and she know, she's speaking very candidly about being sick on the episode, some heavy stuff. But I've always been interested by people who are raised by psychiatrists, psychologists for parents. Is that, I don't think I would like it per se. Is

it a good thing? Is it a bad thing? Is it a neutral thing? What's that experience like as coming from the son's point of view well I mean you because anybody's going to be human right so you're dealing with someone who's working on a day-to-day basis with people who are trying to you know get through a crisis or you know trying to you know deal with trauma or whatever and so they you know my mom, after she passed, all these people gathered at the house that I had never met, like so many of her clients. And I realized, like, wow, like had this were like two multiverses away from my mom having been a cult leader. Like, you know, like this is so close to that. A therapist is so close to being a cult leader, which is why we need licensing and stuff because they get deep

inside of you, you know? And so there's, as far as being a child of a therapist, there's pros and cons of that, you know, meaning that like the pros are that this is a person who's going to be very familiar with the stages that, you know, kids go through that, what, you know, teens go through that, like, you know, but also the cons are going to be like, this is a person who's really, really good at like witnessing micro gestures, you know? So try a lot, try lying. Yeah. Try doing anything, man.

Especially nobody gets away with, you know, I remember thinking that my parents didn't know that I was drunk and, you know, meanwhile, of course they did. The things you think you're getting away with with regular parents, you're not, let alone the people who are trained to know when you're lying, to know when you're suppressing, to know when – I mean, forget about it. No shot.

Yeah, man. Also, I bet I took a lot more tests than most people. I had the experience of – I don't know, like stranger things kid you know like there was always like she was bringing weird fucking tests for me to do considering i had done zero tests with my parents yeah i think you've done more oh all kinds of shit man like just like you know i think like that was the a con of it was that after my folks divorced i got over therapized you know like I was like always like, you know, getting some sort of like evaluation because I get it, you know,

and I, it didn't, that wasn't, there are far worse things that could happen in a kid's life than doing like, you know, those stupid block tests over and over, like Rorschach ink block tests or determining your personality or all that stuff. But overall, it was great in the sense that I think it helped open my eyes a little bit to how deep a human being is. You know, that's the beauty.

I studied psychology in school because of her. Cool. What was that? So I've watched all of them watched also obviously in that episode in particular well i mean i was weeping i wasn't crying i was i was weeping during that episode it's an incredible i believe it's the longest of the theory of the season yes i think it's closer to 40 minutes some of them around 20 what was that like going back and listening to such kind of a profound and intense and personal conversation with your

mother years after she's passed now and trying to see the animation with that because the animation is beautiful too as you you know you start as the baby she stops as a young mother and then it's kind of both of you progressing through life together yeah man that we um number one thank you very much for watching it. My mom would have loved that you were weeping. I was going to ask my mom, because I'm home now with quarantine, and I was going to ask my mother to watch with me. Luckily, she was out, because I don't know what it would have been

if we were watching it. It would have been a puddle, man. Oh, man. Yeah, the cheesy side of me, which is a pretty big side of me, really hopes that is the effect it's having on folks in the sense that we all have weird relationships with our folks. How can you not? It's difficult to not have at least some shit that's weird with your parents. They raised you. You saw all sides of them.

And there's all this karmic stuff you have to work through. But I really am hoping that that gets people to at least like try to work through some of that shit, recognizing that at some point you can't anymore. But as far as, and that you can't anymore, that is what that episode's about, and confronting that. And so that, you know, there's two podcasts I did with my mom through the process of her dying. And I didn't listen to that. I couldn't listen to them. And so that one in particular, Pendleton really loved those episodes. And I knew that like I'd only played the final podcast I did with her once before the show came out. That was for my wife when she found out she was pregnant.

I played it for her so she could meet my mom. You see I'm choking up right now. I'll just choke up. I knew we were going to use the episode for the show and Penn and I went to talk about it. And I remember ordering tequila. I remember I ordered tequila, and Penn, man, he's the coolest person ever. His response when I ordered the tequila is he goes, yeah. I'm drinking it.

I'm just trying to sit there with him and deal with the the fact we're gonna have to like really we're gonna have to make as an episode about my mom passing and how are we going to do that because what am i going to do sit in the animat in the in the editing bay just like crying while people are trying to do like hard edits no don't cut that that that meant everything to me or whatever so we worked out a way that we could do where I could be a little further back from that process. I gave him some ideas that I had to try to symbolize what it's like. Trust, man. That's a lot of trust to put in somebody.

Well, yeah. I mean, that's why it's really important to people you're working with. You trust the man. Because Ted Mouse and Pendleton, by the time we got there, I just realized like we're all synced up enough that. But even then, I'm like, fuck, man, I hope I'm not making a terrible mistake. I hope I'm not disgracing my mother. I hope I'm not. But she would have advised that, I think, or she would have said, just trust, trust this. And, um, you know, like I w the, the, when we were talking, I was saying like, well, you know, maybe there's like a planet that's got a moon and the planet's getting sucked into a black hole,

but the moon is dealing with the fact the planet's getting sucked into the black hole, which is, that's what we're all dealing with. And your parents are dying because we're all getting sucked into the black hole. You know, like that's part of it we're all getting pulled into oblivion and so anyway when i finally did watch this the the the animated episode it was one of the most powerful moments of my life because they brought my mom back to life they caught her spirit that That's her. That's her. Like they did it. I don't know. That's to me, that's proof there is some form of magic because within that last episode, you're seeing my mom and they didn't just catch her. Like there wasn't a lot of footage of her out there. They caught something deeper than what you might see on any of the stuff that's out there,

which isn't much. And so that was a really potent thing because I've got a kid and that's one of the things that I, and I want to have more kids. And that's one of the things you think about is they're not going to get to meet their grandma, their grandmother. That's one of the tragedies of losing a parent. There's, you know, I'm going to have to tell my son what she was like. He doesn't get, she's not going to hold him. So I'm going to be able to show him that episode, show my kids that episode and say, that's your grandma. And to me, that's a miracle. That's one of the great miracles of my life. Some heavy shit, man. I mean, it is, it's like, that's why I kind of said it's revolutionary in a way. It's like,

nobody else has that. Nobody else has this. Nobody else has their podcast turn into a cartoon, turn into a separate piece of art that can capture the essence of their mother who passed away for their kids. I mean, that's the only one. It's a testament to your success to be able to do things that really people haven't been able to do ever. And that will be able to live on forever now.

Y'all are the best. Thank you. I appreciate it, man. But let me just say this. And I love that. And I try not to think about it too much, because the show is about a simulation. And anytime I really ponder it too much,

I'm like, well, this is obviously a simulation because how the fuck do I get to have this happen? It doesn't seem like this could be real. But then that being said, what I really hope is it inspires folks to keep doing. And I know this sounds like a Miss America speech or some shit, but I really hope it inspires people to keep following their heart, man. Because when I was doing my podcast, I did not have that level of aspiration. I never was like one day the guy who made Adventure Time is going to hit me up and we're going to make a show together.

I just love this moment that we're sharing right now. I love it. I live for it. It's connecting with people and I love it. And I did it enough that I guess it's like throwing a message in the bottle when you're on an island. And then all of a sudden this boat, this magical boat filled with cats pulls up and Pendleton Ward is like, get on. Come here. I want to show you something. And then it's like getting abducted by a wizard, basically, you know, and like that that happened to me.

And if it happened to me, it could happen to anybody. And also, I really mean this. I just want podcasting to flourish. I want podcasting to continue to grow and grow and take on all these different mediums. And that's really exciting to me because, you know, this is, I think, a really special medium by itself. And it deserves all the success it can get for all the people who've been doing it for, you know, and learning how to do it. How much do you think your podcast success, like how, how important was the Joe Rogan co-sign for you and your podcast? Do you, did you feel that it changed your career at all?

Yeah, absolutely, man. I got, yeah, for sure. That's yeah, that, you know, people like people make fun of me because I'm so unapologetic about that reality. I just think it's ridiculous. You know, we all have mentors and, and, and the lineage of Buddhism I'm in, you, you celebrate that. That's not a thing you try to imagine didn't happen. You're like, you know, we, our teachers are so important and Rogan, you know, he, he was, he was taking me on the road before I should have been on stage. He thought I was doing a satanic puppet act and he thought it was funny. Is that what it was? I was going to ask you what was like the thing that got him,

a satanic puppet act? Man, I was closing with a satanic, horrible, monstrous puppet named Little Hobo, this like terrible, it was the embodiment of all the worst things I could imagine in the world. And, you know, this is like, this is still fear factor day. So like Rogan's getting people, you know, people who don't know about standup, who are just like, I want to go see the fear factor guy tell jokes. And suddenly, right before that guy comes out, there's this weirdo on stage, his eyes rolling backwards with like a puppet that's like yelling like hail satan hail satan and he thought it was funny

that's the beauty of joe right is like he doesn't give he just does what he does he talks to who he wants to talk to he his topics are what he wants to talk about. And, like, if the audience doesn't like it, fuck off. And it turns out that, like, a hundred bajillion people do like it. So, you know, he figured it out that way. That's incredible, though. I mean, I feel like so many people want that co-sign or just even want to talk to him or be invited on or whatever. So to end up being one of his, like, like his guys is and as far as podcasting is concerned that's that's the ultimate right that's like the the top of the mountain it's bizarre because it

was i mean we i was the talent coordinator of the comedy store and he was just calling and we get these conversations on the phone that would that are identical to what we talk about now on the podcast like he would call he's probably call, he was probably stoned. I was probably stoned. And then we just start talking about like Terrence McKenna and float tanks on the phone. We weren't recording it. I don't think that, I don't, I don't think we even knew what a podcast was at the time. And then, you know, then now all of a sudden he's like interviewing Bernie Sanders.

That was one of the weirdest moments for me. I'm like on YouTube, it's Rogan and Bernie Sanders. Talk about surreal, man. Like this is like a, he's a friend and I, and I, yeah, I'm not saying surreal. Like that guy shouldn't be talking to Bernie Sanders, but just realizing like, holy shit, a friend of mine has gotten to a point in his career where he's sitting down with presidential candidates, where he's sitting down with presidential candidates where he's smoking weed with our generations like the founder of tesla yeah and so yeah that is a that is a wild testament to what can happen to anybody these days you know which and i don't mean anybody like he's in anybody i mean all you've got is who you are and if if you start questioning that, then you're fucked.

And I think someone like Rogan, that's what he puts out there. It's like, the more you tune in with yourself, the more you can expect some form of success. I would say. If you had to pinpoint one thing and maybe you just did it right there, but you know,

when you try to like think of why Rogan is as successful as he is, what would you think is like the one trait of his as a podcaster that separates them? Because it's like, you know, I've always said it's like if I wanted to pick up a basketball and play like LeBron James, like cannot do it, physically impossible. We all can grab a microphone and talk. We all can have a conversation. But yet he does it on like a LeBron james level where it's like what is the x factor what is the difference in a good podcaster a bad podcaster an immortal podcaster because it

is just talking right so what is it well listening you y'all are listening to me i could feel it like you're good at listening i don't you've opened up some conduit here and i could feel it and because you've opened it up it's making me open up to you. And in that openness, it produces these kinds of moments that I consider to be great moments when I'm doing a podcast and you ask great questions. So there's no, I don't think there is a simple answer to your question, but like from observing Joe, one thing that he, he, that seems anomalous to in him compared to other people I know is he's like, he's got like terminator level discipline. Like he, you know what I mean? Like when he decides to learn how to do something, he doesn't like, he commits fully to

it in a way that maybe that like, I think some people would, would be like put off by it in a way that maybe that like i think some people would would be like put off by it in the sense that like there isn't that if he i've seen him like pick stuff up like archery yeah you know it starts with like an interest in it and then all of a sudden he's out in the middle of like the ozarks or some shit taking down bears or whatever elk right you know and and but that's the difference between him and me and most people i know like i've got a bow i've got a bow like sadly hanging outside near a tree we got a ukulele right john you got a ukulele we all got wait hold on There it is. There you go. Hey, this is a mandolin close to you.

I can't play it. This is what happens when you get stoned and go to Guitar Center. It kind of sounds like Led Zeppelin, but if Rogan in some other universe decided he wanted to learn the mandolin, he would now be a gypsy or something. He would have made one. He would have, you know,

like fiction himself and then started playing his own version of it. Yeah. And he naturally would be connected to like these, like, I don't know, Norse mandolin crafters. He'd have some mandolin that was like made out of like the skulls of like saints or something like that.

The hair of Valkyries that's the difference between him and him and me you know and i'll tell you like the one thing i learned early on is like if you really don't want to i just don't don't compare yourself to rogan yeah because that's a good way to hurt yourself it's like a lot of people look at him and they're like ah don't do like it's like i don't know maybe he's an alien or something who knows but he's got discipline that would be the short answer that i made really long is the guy's super disciplined and to me there's relief in that in the sense that that means that if you really want something all you got to do is like become a machine yeah you know there's relief but there's not i mean

that also is like it uh it removes all excuses. It's like you can do it. Just be like fucking Joe. Read the books. Study this. Go out into the mountains and learn how to do it. So it's not like you can't just be like, well, Joe can do it. I can't do it.

It's like, well, if you fucking tried harder, maybe you could. Yeah, and maybe also, but if you can't, that's cool too. Like I've noticed like failure when you're, when you're fully pursuing something, fail, failure has a sacred quality to it. You know, when you're like really going for something and you're, you're, you've done every, literally everything you can and you know it, you've done everything you can and you still fail in that regard i don't even know if that's failure anymore that's just part of the process yeah you know yeah right like what's that i think comics have that as well you know comics will bomb and that's part

of the process and the average human if they got up on stage and bombed in front of a bajillion people they'd hide in their basement forever you know so i think failure for people who who are comics is also part of you know the fabric of who they are once you do something that like you're saying like if you do it 100 and there there aren't a ton of things in my life i've done 100 but the ones i have and they didn't all work i'm just like well that was good even if people hated it i mean i know that was that was that was everything of me that was good i don't care if it got two retweets i don't care if people said that story sucks i don't care that was good that was the best i could do and you can handle that yeah it's easy to be like it's not even a failure it's like you don't think of yourself as

a failure because like i was good i nailed that i know i did this you know this is one of the things i love about Norse mythology. Did you all play God of War? Do you ever play the game God of War? I didn't play it, but I know what you're talking about. It's so good, man. But there's this idea that if you hear it and you take it literally, it sounds fucking horrible and warmongery,

but it's like if you die on the field of battle, then you get to know you get to feast with the gods basically this is like and this also appears in the bhagavad-gita a lot of traditions this concept of jihad or like sacred war and that if you die in that pursuit then that's you you always win even if you lose so to I think that, that what you're talking about is like, you're fully yourself. What else can you be? And if in being fully yourself, the universe responds in a way that wasn't the way you maybe wanted it to, it's a collision between the universe and itself and in there where, how can you beat yourself up for that?

There's some form of perfection in that. And so to me, I think that's the, whenever I just get into that, like, this is who I am as much as I could be. And there are definitely going to be people who are like, fuck that hippie. Fuck that stoner, pseudo philosophical son of a bitch. Holy shit, I had to deal with people like him in college, that motherfucker. I get it. You did have to deal with people who like me in college. I'm sorry. It's me. What can I do? This is what I'm like. I didn't mean to hurt you. I didn't want the way I am to burn you or make you feel annoyed or make you have to be like, ah, let's watch Tiger King, this motherfucking dad. I get it.

You know, but that being said, it's like I was being myself. I was being myself. And so what else can you do? It's all we got. Yeah. At that point you blame them. I don't know. It's your fault.

You didn't find that funny. I'm awesome. I killed it. I did. You're a weird one. Or even more. So you're like, no, you don't blame them. You're like, yeah, you don't like me.

That's who you are. You don't like me. And I probably wouldn't like you. And we're two people who don't like each other together. And somewhere in there, you'll realize, like, fuck, I think we like each other. Then you fuck each other. Yeah!

And then you fuck. And that's how babies are made. Honestly, man, I appreciate you coming on because I probably am very, very opposite of you in a lot of ways. And I think sometimes I need to be reminded of a lot of the stuff you're saying because I'm pretty – it's funny. My last name is actually Clancy. So when you said Clancy Clancy's a depressed piece of shit I was already thinking let's chop that out we'll put that in the intro

we have that set away but it's good to hear a lot of these thoughts and may I address that because I'm glad you actually brought that up but just to fully be myself so everyone knows and god damn I guess that sounded like i was

high road and my friends so many times i've been a depressed piece of shit i've laid on mattress on the floor listening to elliot smith chomping vicodin i didn't have any injuries roaches crawling on my face contemplating whether or not i should like piss the bed because I was so depressed. I didn't want to go use the bathroom. So like my friends, oh, I have been a depressed piece of shit. I know what that's like. And, you know, depression is pretty much the, I have one ball, you know, I had testicular cancer and, you know, I had to get radiation therapy, which means being nauseated for a month. And when I look at the way that felt, if there was some horrific, like saw level person who was like, all right, do you want radiation therapy for a month? Did you want to be depressed for a month? I'm going to have to think about it at the very least because depression is so bad. It's so bad. At least when you're getting radiation

therapy, you know, when it ends with depression, you don't fucking know. You don't know if it's going to go on forever. So, you know, yeah, we aren't really opposites in the sense that if you're depressed right now, I have been you. I have contemplated suicide. I have been medicated. When I was in college, I was on Zoloft and had to get off it because I couldn't come because it does the same thing ecstasy does. Isn't that suck? Same effect. How fucking like torturous is the universe that it's like, all right, we got to make you happy with this pill,

but it's the one thing that makes people the happiest you can't do. Yeah. That's you sound like me talking to my fucking therapist, the psychiatrist who took me off of it. I'm like, are you serious? So you cured my depression, but I can't jizz anymore. I'm having like ecstasy sex minus the ecstasy. You know, like when you come on ecstasy and you're like, thank you, God. Thank you. Thank you, God.

All miracles happened on this night. But it's not, you don't even feel like that. You're just not wanting to kill yourself and you can't come. No thanks, friend. Anyway, I wasn't trying to dis-depress people. I should not use the D word because I'm not depressed. And the people who are have it a lot worse. But just, you know, sometimes I'm very pessimistic. My outlook's pretty bleak sometimes.

I'm very black and white or very, you know, tangible. And sometimes it's good to think a little abstract and all the shit that you kind of put out there today. So it's good to hear that. And I think some of our audience would appreciate it too. Thank you, friend. We need each other, by the way, like watch out. If I'm not careful, man, I'll go, I'll get in a bus. I'll get in a bus with a bunch of hippies and up in some farm somewhere, sharing my wife with people and tie dye.

I need people like you'd be like, no, you're not getting on the bus, Duncan. Thanks for the money, man. That's what we're doing here. You know, we need each other. You know, that's the idea is we're all here to balance each other out so we don't end up on some weird fucking bus or we don't end up, you know, on a mattress in the floor, floor you know setting our house on fire because our cigarette fell into a pile of our old porn magazines while we were falling asleep on xanax we need each other that was super specific that's happened that's happened you are a funny motherfucker, dude. Thank you. I hate to just sound like I'm ball washing for 40 minutes here, which is what I did.

But the show is something. Hate it or love it, I can guarantee many people have never seen anything like it. So everybody go at least give it a shot. I can guarantee you're not going to hate it. Thank you. It's so good. It's so interesting. Thank you.

Especially if you're already listening to a podcast, you're already on board with that kind of shit, just turning it into a psychedelic cartoon. It's awesome. It's Midnight Gospel on Netflix. You can catch him on... What's your podcast name? It's called the Duncan Trussell Family Hour. Family Hour. Catch that and, of course, go back and listen to his Rogan appearances. They're all awesome. You are a cool cat, Duncan

Trussell. You are, too. Thanks, man. Hey, man. Anytime you... I wasn't fishing for a response like that, but thank you. Yeah, there Truss. You are too. Thanks, man. Hey, man. Anytime you get. I wasn't fishing for a response like that, but thank you. Yeah, there we go. Let me ball wash for a minute. You can't just ball wash me and I don't get to ball wash back. That's not American. Thank you.

You all are wonderful. And it is a joy to connect with you and be friends with you. I hope we become. I know I've done, I know that I'm in the presence of great podcasters. When at the end of the podcast, there's been an hour, I'm like, God damn it, it's over. I want to talk to you from now on.

Y'all are awesome. I can't wait to DM Duncan. Hey, Duncan, you want to be friends, man? Let's be friends. Yes. Yes. Friends. Okay.

Yes. Let's mutually ball wash for the rest of our lives. Thank you. Great meeting you. Really appreciate it. Thank you for being a friend. Travel down the road and back again. Your heart is true. You're a pal and a confidant

I'm not ashamed to say I hope it always will stay this way My hat is off Won't you stand up and take a bow And if you threw a party Invited everyone you knew You would see the biggest gift would be from me And the card attached would say Thank you for being a friend Thank you for being a friend

Thank you for being a friend Thank you for being a friend Thank you for being a friend If it's a car you lack I'd surely buy you a Cadillac Whatever you need Any time of the day or night I'm not ashamed to say

I hope it always will stay this way My hat is off Won't you stand up and take a bow And when we've broken all out With walking keys and hair of grey Have no fear Even though it's hard to hear I will stand real close and say

Thank you for being a friend I wanna thank you Thank you for being a friend I wanna thank you Thank you for being a friend. I want to thank you. Thank you for being a friend. I want to thank you. Thank you for being a friend. I want to thank you.

Let me tell you about a friend. I want to thank you. Thank you for being a friend. I want to thank you. Thank you for being a friend. I want to thank you. Thank you for being a friend. I want to thank you. Thank you for being a friend. And when we laugh and go away into the night, the milky way.

You'll hear me call as me and you. I'll say the same thing once again. Thank you for being a Thank you for being a friend I want to thank you Thank you for being a friend I want to thank you Thank you for being a friend I want to thank you

Thank you for being a friend People let me tell you about a friend I want to thank you Thank you for being a friend I wanna thank you Thank you for being a friend I wanna thank you Thank you for being a friend Whoa, tell you about a friend

I wanna thank you right now For being a friend Thank you for being a friend I wanna tell you about a friend And I'll tell you again Thank you for being a friend. Thank you for being a friend. I want to tell you about a pal and I'll tell you again. Thank you for being a friend. Thank you, thank you, thank you for being a friend.