KFC Radio - Dying Deadspin, Rhett & Link, and Jason Nash
Episode Date: October 31, 2019How to blow yourself. Does the ocean have walls? Obama & Mitt Romney. Deadspin writers think they are civil rights activists. Voicemails include: Building Frankenstein, Day or Night, Eat Your Dog,... how women masturbate.Rhett & Link from Good Mythical morning stop by to talk about their new book, basically inventing Youtube, actually inventing Chuck Testa, being Youtube dads and having rich people hair.Jason Nash joins KFC to talk about Vine, the Vlogsquad, and stand-up comedyYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr
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Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
It's another edition of KFC Radio brought to you by Felix Grey Glasses.
Woody, woo!
Did you see Trent?
Trent is just wearing the wrong size glasses.
Like, really, really the wrong size glasses.
He took them off
and he has like a permanent divot in his head looks like fucking shane battier he has like
i mean a very noticeable like divot in his head where the the i don't know this what do you call
those the sticks of your glasses the frames and and and like he didn't know it and i was like oh my god dude and then he felt it he
was like oh my god i'm never gonna stop thinking about this like what it's like he's wearing
children's glasses with his big fat corn head it's crazy his big fat corn head yeah speaking of crazy
we'll get to it after this just go ahead we. We're off the rails these days. Oh, my God. It's an off-the-rails week. What the hell was Marty?
Did you see what happened with Martin?
The walls!
The walls!
But the fact, that's crazy in and of itself.
He just, like, we were just talking.
Yeah.
Everyone was in a circle talking.
And he just tweets that.
And he just, like, had his phone out.
He's just playing with his phone.
And he just tweets, like, how are there no walls to the ocean?
He's so stupid
that he's smart because like that's something you do when you're like this this conversation
bores me like you guys are talking about the baseball game i'm over here having intellectual
thoughts about science and ocean walls and like he's he's humoring you he's just like letting you
peasants talk sports while he thinks about the ocean walls. The fact that he doesn't understand. The ocean is
an in-ground pool, Marty. Yes, exactly.
That's what I was saying. What was his line?
How come there's no water in the streets?
How come there's no water in the streets from your pool,
Marty?
Because there's only a certain amount of water,
and it's filled up
in this space called...
I wanted to...
I was thinking about it all night. I was like, here's how I'm going to describe it to him.
And I'm thinking like,
what if the Earth was just completely dry
and it just looked like this
and some parts of it had holes
and some parts of it were high
and some parts of it were low
and then you poured water into it.
And the Pacific Ocean
is just a big batch of water
that fills up to a certain point.
And then that's it.
I was thinking about like,
I was going to get some styrofoam
and come in and show him
this is what the world looks like
you fucking moron you just have to show him
a pool right
exactly like that
that looked like the deck
by the way whatever the ground surrounding the pool
how come the pool water isn't on that ground
just cause it's in the pool if you don't know
what we're talking about I guess we had to describe it better last night
on the live stream as everyone was just
hanging out on the couch watching the gambling cave marty marty tweeted like how come how does the ocean like
stay put with no walls let me get the exact wording because even just his stupidity can't
even be paraphrased so mad his stupidity can't be paraphrased it's got to be read verbatim
and he said it's truly this is at 7 12 p. last night. It's truly amazing we have oceans that aren't surrounded by walls like a pool.
And it does, by the way, just one sentence.
It's truly amazing we have oceans that aren't surrounded by walls like a pool and it doesn't leak out into the streets, period.
And Feidelberg was like, we do have fucking walls.
It's called like the earth.
It's called the plates.
It's called the crust.
It's, I don't know if they're tectonic plates, but whatever they are, they're the walls.
Like, you know, the ground is flat, but then if there was no water there, it would just go down like a wall.
Like a fucking wall.
He's literally stomping it.
It really pissed off Rudy.
He was like, he makes an interesting point.
No, he doesn't.
You're just as stupid, Rudy.
If you're watching on Barstool Gold, Feidelberg was like, he was like the lollipop guild. He was like, no, you're fucking. No, he doesn't! You're just as stupid, Rudy. If you're watching on Barstool Gold,
Feidelberg was like, he was like the lollipop guild.
He was like,
I'm gonna fucking get you!
He was like pulling his hair out of his head.
He's like,
Go out of the walls!
Go to fucking Earth!
Marty just would not, he just would not relent.
And then one of the other idiots was on your side.
He was correct, but he was an idiot.
So it was like, well, all I have for backup is an idiot.
I was like, I'm gonna get in my car in my car and drive into the fucking city right now
just to teach these morons what's going on.
Yeah, it was Jack. The fake Jack Mack?
Fake Jack, yeah. Fucking idiot. Like, come on.
Good catch. Yeah.
Anyway,
the thing about Marty is he's Dr. Rat
and he puts on a pair of glasses and all of a sudden he thinks he's smart.
Because when you wear glasses, you're smart.
Fact. It's like, you smoke cigarettes, you're cool. You wear glasses, you're smart. Fact. It's like you smoke cigarettes, you're cool.
You wear glasses, you're smart.
These are things that are just facts.
Universal facts.
And so Felix Gray, they know that you're going to look cool, but they're also going to try to help you out.
They're going to try to save your eyeballs.
Because the average American blasts their eyeballs with bright lights for 11 hours a day.
We're at at least 16.
I mean, 12 hours on the computer for work and on the phone for work.
An hour, a couple minutes here for porn,
a couple hours, a couple minutes here when you're reading something at night.
Speaking of porn, I've been just
doing it quick lately. Really?
Yeah, I've been doing the whole thing.
Let's talk about that in a second.
So Felix Grey makes glasses that
can save your eyes with the Felix Grey
blue light filtering glasses
available in prescription and non-prescription.
I mean, Trent needs a new...
I feel like his
brain is going to leak out of his ears.
How is that possible?
He's got no walls. No walls!
Why doesn't your brain just come out of your ears? It just leaks out everywhere.
But,
honestly,
when it comes to the vagina, that is the case.
I'm almost Marty when it comes to the vagina.
It's like, this should just be leaking all the time.
Yeah, I mean, it is.
It should be.
It is.
Constantly vaginal.
It's crazy to love this or hate this.
We're either doing a make good or they're like,
we're going to play this at their fucking conferences.
Like, this is what we want from our ad reads.
I don't think it's that.
I don't think it's at the conference.
You know what?
It's probably not, but it should be.
Because the general public is going to fucking remember
Felix Grey glasses and walls
and all cigarettes and pussies
and stuff. People always say
that you guys do the best ads on the
network, but I'm like, do they
play these? Do they show these
to Ellie? And they're like, do it like this!
I honestly might as well just do the make good
right now. I should just read the script
right now.
So, the actual start of this episode is brought to you by Felix Gray.
Felix Gray Glasses, gray with an A, glasses.com slash Kevin.
Fuck, John.
Free shipping and 30 days of risk-free returns or exchanges for a pair of the blue light filtering Felix Gray Glasses.
That's FelixGrayGlasses.com slash Kevin.
Talking porn.
What, you don't like porn anymore?
Pussy?
It's not porn that I don't like.
It's myself, probably.
Like, I haven't made love to myself in a while.
Like, every time I've been, like, I've been fucking myself.
But, like, it's quick.
There's no passion in it.
It's funny you use that word.
I caught some heat the other day.
I was promoting the fuck out of it. Well, I guess i guess by the way this is our first episode since the internet came
out well came out tuesday right but now yeah we did our we'll be on we'll be rich in tahiti yeah
in the future but now we know we're actually getting screwed i'm not getting it now we know
that all the money is going somewhere else now it's really frustrating now we saw how many how many fucking things we sold
and it's like oh none of that went to us amazon sold out walmart's ready to ship we're selling
out it's it's uh it's a it's as big of a success as we thought we already sold in a day we sold
with that initial memory i've been telling everybody how much we initially ordered and
how we were off by a factor of like 25 times we already sold that for more than that yeah like way more than that like i think i think we i think
amazon individually sold just that yeah pretty good pretty good um uh so but i was promoting
the fuck out of it and we did that thing with the video where it went really fast and you pushed
down a button and one of them was if you had the flexibility to blow yourself would you and then
would you tell people and i said you're fucking lying if you wouldn't at least try it.
I don't think I would.
You would try it.
Yes, you would.
I would try it.
I have tried it.
But you didn't successfully try it.
If you successfully tried it and you came to yourself.
I haven't tried in a long time.
When was the last time you tried to suck your own dick?
I mean, it's been a long time.
Brandon?
Don't you fucking act like you haven't.
Don't get on it.
Maybe when I was very, very young.
The reason I don't try anymore is
I also don't try to dunk a basketball.
It's a physical impossibility now.
There was a chance.
When was the last time you guys tried?
I can honestly say it was probably
when I was learning how to jerk off.
It was probably like 13, 14.
I was probably 25.
You were trying to say you were 25?
No, but I was probably in high school.
I don't think so.
I think I just...
Have you ever reached it?
I learned fast.
Have you ever reached it?
No, I didn't even get close.
You can't even come close.
I came close.
Because you have no flexibility.
You can't even touch your toes.
No, I can't.
I can touch my toes.
I mean... It's about the flexibility. You know what I'm about to do. Yeah I can't. I can touch my toes. I mean...
It's about the flexibility.
You know what I'm about to do.
Yeah.
Is it suck your own dick?
Yeah.
I'm going to...
I mean, it's always like that.
Somebody has to get at least near a mic.
The problem is, it's like, you got to be flexible and you got to have a dick size.
You know?
Oh, boy.
Oh, you do it that way? What do you mean? be flexible and you got to have a dick size, you know? Oh, boy. You're going to.
Oh, you do it that way?
What do you mean?
How else would you do it?
I stand up.
What?
What?
Yeah.
What are you talking about?
I just go like this.
What?
Yeah.
That's insane.
How did you do it?
That's insane.
Like John.
Are you fucking kidding me?
You just fucking tried to suck your own dick standing up?
Yeah, you've got to use gravity.
You've got to use gravity.
You've got to have your hips coming towards you.
What?
No, see, I disagree, because I feel like when you fold up, your dick is almost like going in.
This is like, my dick is up like this, and I'm just trying to get to the tip.
No way.
Yeah.
Maybe.
Maybe.
I haven't tried it that way.
There is no wrong way to suck your own dick.
Well, they're all the wrong way because we haven't succeeded at once.
I'm going to Google this right now because there's definitely, there's got to be a guy
who's filmed it.
How to suck your own dick?
No, I'm going to Google like guy sucking his own dick.
I guarantee there's a video.
I'm going to see how he's doing it.
Because by the way.
I guarantee he's laying down.
Let's say you succeed.
Wouldn't your head be like hitting the ground?
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. I'm sucking
my own dick the right way. There's no way.
You're just like a fucking rooster, just like
cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck. There's no
I call him rooster. I don't know. What?
Do roosters cluck? Chicken. Chicken head.
But like what? Oh, yeah, yeah.
Chicken head.
Suck your own dick video.
Sucking your own dick on X videos.
Yeah, he does it your way.
Yeah, of course he does it my way.
But that's fake.
That's someone else's legs.
That's someone else's legs.
I saw a video.
I saw a video of a girl going down on herself that was clearly fake.
It was like, you know that, like, you almost play a game where you sit on someone and they cross their legs.
She was doing that with just a whole other body, and it was very, very obvious that's what she was doing.
She was just eating someone else's pussy, saying it was her own.
Anyway, off the rails once again.
I was talking about that question
and i said i do i need energy so we'll do let's do another shot um what is this fucking random
is this yours just a random cup of coffee new amsterdam shout out um i think you're lying if
you wouldn't say you try what let's say right now you bless every man with the flexibility to do so,
they would at least try.
If you don't like second dick, then fine.
You're going to try.
Oh, I would try.
I just don't think I would like a dick in my mouth.
Fine.
But then I said, you know, would you talk about it?
Would you tell people?
And honestly, is it that much different than talking about
passionately stroking your penis several times a week?
Yes, it is.
Why?
It's very, very different.
Why?
Because touching, like, I touch things all the time
that I don't like.
Would you touch my dick?
I'd touch your dick, too.
Would you jerk me off?
No, I wouldn't jerk you off.
I'd touch it.
But touching things
is so much less intimate
than sucking things.
That's just a fact.
Right, but we're still talking
about an intimate act.
It's not like one
is completely not sexual.
You're doing something sexual
with a dick all the time.
Yeah, but I can't taste it.
Fine, but it's all over your fucking hand
You blast it onto your belly
So that's pretty fucking gay and intimate
You know
Yeah but I don't
I know it's more intimate
And the word we're looking here for is worse
But
It's not like jerking off is not a thing
It's sexual
That's the whole It's tasting.
That's the whole difference.
I just don't taste the dick.
Well, so you're worried about the physical.
Most guys are not doing this because they're like, well, am I gay?
Right.
And it's like, well, jerking off a dick is gay.
It's just your dick.
So why is sucking the dick gay?
If you're worried about the physical, like I don't want the flesh in my mouth and the color in my mouth, fine.
But I guarantee you most guys are not worried about that and they're more worried about
like, this makes me gay.
Oh, I don't think so.
Really?
You think that people are turned off by, like, this tastes gross?
I don't care about the homoeroticism.
I just don't want to taste my dick.
We're kind of gay, you know?
My dick definitely doesn't taste good.
He's poor, girls.
It's just a fact.
Like, I know for a fact my dick doesn't taste good.
I know it.
I have the worst diet in the history of the world.
Today I had 20 chicken McNuggets, a McFlurry, a quarter pounder, and an Adderall for lunch.
And for dessert, amphetamines.
That is the worst tasting imaginable.
I didn't realize
where you go.
I thought you were saying
I put all this garbage
in my mouth,
but I won't put my dick
in my mouth.
You're talking about the
Oh, yeah.
No, I'm talking about
what that would make me
taste like.
By the way,
it's not good.
I'm so happy.
I love this podcast.
I love this because
what just happened there,
by the way,
to rewind for a second,
hasn't happened to me
in so long because
we've covered so many things
when you think
that you're
doing something the right way and it's the wrong way and i don't even know who's right or wrong
there i know i'm right but i think i made some sense myself but when you when i didn't even
think it yeah i didn't even consider throwing my legs over my head when that happens it's so fun
most people it most it happens for a lot of people with with shitting and wiping the first time you
realize that some people stand and some people
sit, it blows your mind.
When you get your mind blown, it's hard at 35
to get your mind blown. I've seen it all. I've heard it all.
When you've done 10 years on the internet, you've seen
and heard it all. I did not think about
throwing my legs over my head and sucking my own dick.
I thought you did it
standing up. It just happened
like two weeks ago, too. You both
fucking, you two perverts take
your balls out to piss no uh wait what was that one yeah if you're i just go stem out yeah if i
by the way i don't i think that got a little mischaracterized if i have a fly i just go uh
oh okay i'm talking about because i think we were talking about no no uh fly underwear where you
have to pull down if i pull down i go under the balls okay i don't do
that either but i guess it makes more sense that because you know what the thing is to bring it
back to that because i thought about this if i were to take like so again we're talking about
boxers or sweatpants that are elastic with no fly if i put just my dick there the elastic stronger
than my dick like it's gonna to pull my dick up almost.
The balls give it... It's standing.
I can take my elastic...
That's why you keep testosterone in the cum!
I can take the elastic, again,
sweatpants or boxers, whatever. I can put it under my balls
and I can leave it there. If I put
just the elastic in between my balls
and my dick... It's like a fire hose that you're holding down.
Yes! It's going to pull your dick up your dick up things going all over the place so how am i the wrong one i just
well i just hold it all the time i don't yeah okay well fine that so i i can do mine hands off
i can go hands off too you got you got a fucking fat heavy dick on you got a heavy cock i actually
outweigh some elastic. That's like... That's like breaking the rules of business.
People always...
Tell you what, you want to impress people?
Piss without your hands.
Every time someone comes into the bathroom,
you're like, no hands?
I'm just like chilling, arms up.
This guy, he's cool.
This guy pisses without his...
I'll just be leaning on the wall.
I actually look really cool pissing.
I guarantee it.
Lean on the other.
But you can do that with just your twig out.
I need the berries for fortification.
My stomach hurts.
What are we talking about?
Should we get into...
Before the show started,
we were going through the rundown of what we
want to talk about the two things we wanted to talk about were barack obama and mitt romney
and somehow we're just talking about sucking our own dicks
i'm telling you man this podcast is the best on the internet i don't know how we don't have
joe rogan money yet this shit is so fucking funny what is going on it's totally we we like had to send
brendan like okay here's the clip we'd like to discuss with brock obama here's the clip we'd
like to say today will be the political episode of knc radio and i promptly fucking tried to show
how i'd suck my own dick the wrong way i was within five minutes I was up on this table trying to suck my own penis.
Oh, my God. We should still get to the politics to show our range.
Let's get political on them.
The KSU radio politics.
Yeah.
How did we get there?
Oh, the whole point was that people on the Internet gave me a hard time for saying that I stroke my dick passionately.
And because that's how you said you jerk off.
I got some confirmation from my guy.
It's a passionate jerk. And if you're not
passionately jerking off, you're doing it wrong. And if you have a problem
with people at Barstool Sports talking about
passionately stroking their dicks, well then you're not
one of us. That's how
I've made my fucking career. Thank you very much.
Fuck off.
Politics. Anyway, the ocean
has walls. Politics is brought
to you by Steve Madden.
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That's how you want to be.
So you want to go up in the place.
You've got to walk into work or the event you're at.
And it's like, oh, that guy's classic.
He knows what he's doing.
He dresses proper.
But did you see that color?
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You want to start with Mitt or Barrick?
Barry, Barry-o.
Let's go Barry.
Yeah, this one I think was the more important and viral clip.
And I think that, let's just play it.
This is Obama talking about cancel culture
and how fucking stupid it is
and how dumb you are if you think you're woke
just because you talk shit on social media.
The world is messy.
There are ambiguities.
People who do really good stuff have flaws. People who you are fighting may love their kids and
share certain things with you. And I think that one danger I see among young people,
particularly on college campuses, Malia and I talk about this.
Yara goes to school with my daughter.
But I do get a sense sometimes now among certain young people, and this is accelerated by social media,
there is this sense sometimes of the way of me making change is to be as judgmental as possible about other people.
And that's enough.
Like if I tweet or hashtag about how you didn't do something right
or used the wrong verb,
then I can sit back and feel pretty good about myself.
Because man, you see how woke I was?
I called you out.
Let me get on TV.
Watch my show. Watch Grown-ish.
You know, that's not activism.
I love the fact that this has to put the conservatives in like a pretzel, where it's like, we hate Obama, but he's saying
exactly what they believe in, which is I think
why this is such a great clip because it's like
even a guy who those woke people
probably think of as like their
savior, you know, as like the gold standard
are like,
wait, what? You know, I saw a couple
tweets being like, it is so upsetting
to see Barack, I don't know why they call him Barack,
he's Obama,
to see Barackack i don't really call him barack you know he's obama to see barack like uh speaking down on on social justice and activism and it's like
well did you listen to what he said like he's literally real social justice and activism just
not your dumb fucking version of it that includes throwing stones at people on the internet but also
that like first of all i don't agree with culture. I do not think it's a thing.
What does that mean?
It is.
I think people try and get mad at you.
So what?
But people get canceled.
But, like, for, like, real reasons.
Right.
But I think that it can.
Yeah, like, for, like, raping people.
Like, if you say, like, fuck or, like, you don't lose your job.
Right.
But, well, I mean, that's where you get back to, like, the SNL thing and certain.
I mean, yeah, I guess you're right.
Off the top of my head, I can't think of someone who...
Has there been someone who was canceled who you're like,
I can't believe that happened?
I'm not the one because I just have a bad memory.
There's got to be somebody.
Like Louis C.K., he did something bad.
And he also didn't get canceled.
He's still a stand-up comedian. He's rich.
Yeah, but then he lost $30 million dollars in an hour His show got cancelled
Because he
Jerked off in front of people for 20 years
Roseanne got cancelled
For tweeting Nazi stuff
Nazi things
I support Hitler
She was tweeting Nazi things
Didn't she say that somebody looks like they're from Planet of the Apes and it was, like, a black woman?
Oh, yeah, that too.
But, like, it was, like, that was, and that was, like, the culmination of, like, Roseanne's been tweeting really racist stuff on Twitter for a long time.
Right, but it's, like, are you canceled if you do something wrong?
You know, like, I think that, like, the outcry for the guy who said the stuff about ozuna
like that's part of it it's like he said you know he was like ozuna ozuna and that had domestic
violence implications but like i don't think he was fired on the spot for that he was fired
because of the outrage right yeah so that's fair but like also like he probably should have been
fired like he went up to a bunch of female journalists and unpromptedly screamed about
how much he loves the guy who beat his wife
I mean but I think the culture
around that's not a guy you should not want
running your baseball team the cancel culture is
the is the like seeking
out of can I tap into
outrage for this
because I just don't think it works a lot
yeah but I would also say that maybe you don't like completely
lose your job but you are
you have a bad two days yeah but I would also say that maybe you don't completely lose your job, but you are – You have a bad two days.
Yeah, but I think it can hinder your career.
Maybe you don't lose everything, but I think you have a reputation.
You have a scarlet letter.
You have certain doors are closed.
You don't have the same – you're not in the same standing you once were.
But all those things aren't getting canceled.
Those are all – yeah, your life will change if you do something.
But none of those things mean you got canceled.
Canceled, yeah.
I mean I guess the word at hand is like did you – are you no longer employed?
Can you no longer make money?
Maybe not.
But I think that the idea that like if enough people complain about something on the internet that you can like negatively impact someone, I think is what he's talking about here.
And it's not even that – like a lot of times it's justified.
Maybe they don't like achieve the ultimate goal of getting you fired or whatever that is.
But I think Obama is talking about it from the other direction of like you shouldn't feel accomplished by doing that.
Correct.
That's the bigger message.
I agree with everything he said.
My stance on cancel culture is that it's not real.
But everything he said was right. The people who are... Maybe the quote-unquote victims of cancel culture
aren't as much victims as the narrative is.
But the people who enact it,
they go home at night and they fucking put a notch on their belt.
I saved the world.
It's me and Martin Luther King.
You are a dickhead with a Twitter account the same way.
You know, it's like,
I remember thinking it so vividly during the election when it was like,
Lena Dunham is just,
uh,
like,
um,
like the opposite end of like one of those alt-right guys.
I mean,
it's like,
you can be equal,
but opposite.
You're still just an asshole who's spouting your opinions.
And you know,
you know,
what are most people?
I think like the liberal point of view is a little more,
it's usually like a little more like good or right quote unquote uh but it's like no you're just
that's just like your dumb ass opinion that you if you yell it loud enough you feel like you
enacted change and and he the people you were talking about who like quote to them like it's
so depressing to see him say this or whatever like you're exactly what he's talking about yes
he's like dumb ass look in the mirror he. You have a difference of opinion about one thing.
That doesn't mean I'm a bad person.
You have a difference of opinion on this one topic.
It's not a big deal.
And most of it's, yeah, if it's like life or death,
if it's like, you know, we're talking about, you know,
fucking, I don't know, something that's super, super,
where literally is life and death, like, fine.
That can be something where you're, like, at odds.
But if we're talking about, like, a difference of political opinion
and taxes and, like, shit like that, that it's like it definitely is a problem like i like i
i follow a majority of people i follow are pretty liberal people i think i'm it's pretty obvious i'm
a pretty liberal person i think it's pretty known yeah and i don't think anyone likes a single
president like i've seen i've seen them bitch about trump for three years now. I haven't seen anyone like
a presidential candidate now because
everyone has one problem with them. And then that
one problem you latch onto
and focus on. And it's like
a whole thing. I can't possibly like them.
They said this in 1976.
Or like, I can't possibly like them.
This is their stance on tag.
You're going to have to make a fucking choice.
The retroactive shit is crazy. Imagine if it's just like, this guy's great, but like what are you talking like you're gonna have to make a fucking choice the retroactive shit is crazy imagine if it's just like this guy's great but
like the halloween costume 30 years ago out out it's just like guys you're gonna you know it's
like anything else in life like your partner is not going to be perfect and your job's gonna be
perfect you're gonna have to like look the other way on some things i do you ever think about that
how like i some of the thing about that is pat myself on the back. I got nothing. Nothing in your closet?
Yeah.
I didn't dress up as a racist in 92.
I'll tell you.
I mean, I got something.
But Halloween-wise, I am fucking a mint, bro.
Fucking mint!
I got no Halloween skeletons in my closet.
But even stuff like that where it's just like things you could have tweeted before you worked at
Barstool. I don't have anything.
Because I tell you what, people have definitely gone through.
Well, you've just always been out there, too.
I mean, right? Right. Like, ever since that era,
you've just done it publicly. Yeah.
Also, I'm just a good person.
Well, right. But there's also something to
living outwardly.
I mean, I think the ultimate example is the current
president. Like, he's just been the ultimate example is the current president.
Like, he's just been the way he is the whole time.
So when you dig back and you find something, you're like, well, yeah.
Yeah, obviously.
I mean, that seems pretty well.
Sand to the beach, man. Yeah.
Oh, he didn't like the Central Park Five?
Makes sense.
No fucking kidding.
I just loved it from the other point of view of, like, this is, like, you know,
your hero and savior, and even he will you know, you're a hero and savior.
And even he will tell you that you're an asshole.
Right.
Thinking that you're special.
The dead spin people,
that Laura wags tweet.
Yes.
I am making a list of everyone.
Who's do you see that?
No,
she said something like,
yes,
Dave's tweet.
Dave was so goddamn fucking funny.
Yeah.
When he gets up,
when he gets on this,
like it's,
it's,
he's got his,
he said he will publish all blogs that they're deleting.
Yes.
That's so funny. And he would. And publish all blogs that they're deleting, that's fucking so funny.
And he would.
It's a real offer.
Email it to me.
I'll post it on Barstool Sports.
He would pay that guy to be his butler, too.
Oh, that's right.
Some of them should take up his offer.
They were smart.
They would do it and start writing.
And write about, like, Bash Dave.
We do it all the time.
You're allowed to do it here.
What's very funny is these people want to work for Barstool sports you want editorial freedom come on over come on down like you can
talk about whatever you want the thing if dave actually saves deadspin if he gets it to be like
a great site because he just gets full control wouldn't put it past him because that would be
the ultimate like fuck off lara wagner said laura wagner said yes i am care like the yes implying that like are people asking yes
i am carefully noting every media person who has and hasn't expressed support for deadspin and its
editorial independence shut the fuck up like you are not fucking like south africa and apartheid
man you are not like running a revolution for freedom it's not the fucking you're not it's
not the underground Railroad.
You write for a dumbass sports blog.
Okay?
You're not fucking Harriet Tubman, Laura Wagner.
You're just a shitty blogger like the rest
of us. You'll write some blogs,
you'll die, and no one will remember
you. It won't matter.
It will not matter.
The play of Deadspin will not be taught in
journalism school because a
website that didn't fucking make money ended up getting sold for pennies on the dollar and then
guess what they had to add ads to the site god forbid advertising you dumb fucking assholes
yeah i've never it's it's it's just the best example i've ever seen of like you are children
yeah you are little immature babies who don't understand business who don't understand
money who don't understand rules and and standards and like paying your dues i hate to do it but it's
it does feel like the millennial fucking narrative you know what i mean it's like you are a bunch of
cry babies and like that fucking guy barry i guess he's been there i don't know that one i know tom
he's been there for 10 years like was it worth dude? You just flushed 10 years down the drain?
Like, I do this all the time.
I got fired for not sticking to sports.
Shut up, dude.
By the way.
Shut up.
Like, you've seen the turnover at your own company.
Right.
I do this all the time at Barstool Sports.
They tell me not to do something.
I wait six months, and I do it.
Barry, you'll have a new editor-in-chief and a new owner in six months because you've had three in the past year.
And that guy probably will let you write about it.
So shut the fuck up.
Keep your paycheck and your job and write about non-sports in the summer.
You dickhead.
God.
Obama, like, he should have said at the end, like, dad's been talking about you.
Like, God, fucking children.
I would love to, like, I would love to fucking hear from, like, Mr. and Mrs. Wagner and be like, my daughter's so fucking stupid.
You're fucking going to lose your job over this shit.
You're a blogger.
Just fucking blog.
It's such an easy job.
Nobody even really knows you in our stupid echo chamber.
You think, like, the world knows and cares?
Nope.
Deadspin?
Fuck off.
If you ain't breaking news about fake girlfriends or skinny dicks
nobody gives a fuck about you yeah two two times in the history of deadspin have you been
interesting go ahead lose your job over it let's talk about mitt romney what a fucking guy mitt
romney is remember when he what he did something funny with a hot dog he said a hot dog was his
favorite meat or something like that remember that one no i'm gonna look it up real quick
there's something about hot dogs and mitt romney that was just preposterous it was like
again like these people are just not humans that's why like i liked obama being like that's just like an average guy
being like these people are such assholes right uh most of them are just like you're not real
mitt ironed a suit while i was on him once yeah mitt romney says his favorite meat is a hot dog
that's not i mean that's not a thing that's like a i'm gonna be a common man like i'm a regular guy
what's my favorite hot dog you don't have to say it's your favorite meat asked him about his
favorite it wasn't it was national hot dog day and he was like eating a hot dog and he was just Did you see? Hot dogs. You don't have to say it's your favorite meat. Who asked him about his favorite meat?
It wasn't.
It was National Hot Dog Day, and he was eating a hot dog, and he was just like, hi, guys.
It's me, Mitt Romney.
Hello, America.
I love a good hot dog.
It's my favorite meat.
And you know that his publicist was filming.
He was like, fuck.
I've got the worst presidential candidate ever.
Did you see when he got on his birthday, when he took off every candle individually and
blew it out?
Yeah.
It's like, you're not like it's just not like human
like you
have you seen how humans act?
Act like us.
But they have it.
It's like he's been living
in his fucking mansion
with his, you know what I mean?
It's like this is where
the hillbillies are like
you ain't one of us.
You know?
It's like you're really not.
You're a fucking
you're a robot.
The weirdest thing about
Mitt Romney is that
he was the governor
of Massachusetts.
Yeah, I had that.
He's from fucking Utah.
He's a Mormon from Utah.
How'd you guys elect him? We just elected fucking Utah. He's a Mormon from Utah.
We just elected him governor.
I believe he did a really great job, by the way.
Good enough to be a presidential you can't be a shitty governor and become
the president. I think he was pretty well liked
by, obviously Massachusetts is a pretty blue state, I think he was
pretty well liked by everybody. Mitt.
What a name. I could be totally wrong on that.
What's his real name? Is it Mitchell?
Or is it just like a fake, you know,
it's a name like Steve and they call him Mitt.
That seems like some weird white people shit, you know?
Well, we'll call him Mitt.
We're going to get into our Mitt Romney talk.
Willard.
Well, yeah, I mean, of course.
Yeah, of course Mitt Romney's name is Willard.
If your name is Willard, you go by Mitt,
you don't know how to act.
Like, no wonder you're not president, dude.
Mitt Romney talking college athletes is brought to you by Untuckit.
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Mitt Romney clip. He's talking about college athletes who are finally, I guess, going to get
paid. Well, I was pleased that the Board of Governors recognizes that we got a lot of
athletes that come from very poor backgrounds that need some additional remuneration, in some
cases to take care of their families, but to provide for themselves as well. So I'm glad they
recognize that. But I hope they also recognize that this whole idea of using name, image, and likeness
as a way to compensate athletes could lead to some very unusual circumstances that need to be avoided.
So there's some work that needs to be done.
Clearly, the devil is going to be in the details here.
But did you see this decision from the NCAA as a delaying action,
or is it actually an embrace of a new model?
Well, I think given the California legislation and the fact that the Board of Governors is saying,
yeah, okay, we're open to this idea, that suggests that there's actually going to be some movement here.
And if not, why, I think Congress will act to make some movement,
because I think we recognize it's just not fair to have these athletes giving the kind of time they give to their sport and not receiving any kind of compensation or remuneration, particularly at a time when they come from very, very poor families in many cases.
But, look, what you can't have is a couple athletes on campus driving around in Ferraris while everybody else is basically having a hard time making ends meet.
And you can't have a setting where some schools that are in major markets
or have big sport followings, some schools are like the honeypot,
and everybody, all the great athletes all want to go to those handful of schools.
Then you kill collegiate sports.
So there needs to be some adjustment.
Those schools already exist.
It's already that way.
Alabama, Clemson, Kentucky, Duke, those are the schools.
They already exist.
They already exist.
Everybody already wants to go there.
They already make the money. Those guys are already the famous ones. They already get the spo it already exists it already existed everybody already wants to go there they already make the money those guys are already the famous ones they
already get the spoils it's it's already there you might as well it's like everything else when
it comes to legalizing things because that's really what we're doing here it's like it's
legalizing something in a way which already exists you might as well regulate it and control it
gambling is gonna happen you might as well make some money off it and do it the proper way
people are already getting benefits they're already getting under the money under the table money they're already getting uh like the the fame
off of it you might as well just harness it yeah it'd be like like oh that we i think his literal
quote was we can't have some big sports schools that everyone wants to go to can't have like what
are you talking about dude and aside from that the first part of what he said when he's like we can't
have some kids in ferraris and some kids.
Dude, Mitt Romney, have you been outside?
No.
Some people drive Ferraris.
Some people are struggling to be in me.
That's what capitalism is.
Willard is pretending to eat hot dogs in his fucking mansion.
He hasn't been around.
He doesn't know.
He thinks everybody's fucking rich.
He thinks everybody's well off.
It's so crazy that he said that with a straight face.
Yeah.
No, that's, I mean.
I mean, Mitt Romney is a billionaire.
Yeah.
You can't have some people with lots of money and other people without.
All right.
Mitt.
Come on, dude.
Mitt Romney, you're literally describing America.
Capitalism at its finest.
This world as a whole.
Everything we stand for is what you're describing.
I don't know what to do, though.
I mean, like, the, I like that they should be able to get paid.
I think that the day that you give game checks is when you...
It's right and what should happen,
but it's just going to ruin college sports.
So what?
Right.
But that's the shitty byproduct.
I am fine ruining college sports.
Yeah.
I mean, I personally don't care.
I don't watch enough college sports to really care.
But it's just like...
College sports, as you know, it will be over.
It's what's right.
Why?
Because it will just become like... They'll probably'll probably have to have like a salary cap almost.
Okay.
And then it's just like, there's gonna be two professional leagues.
The retweet I had about this was, I think, Jane McManus.
And I don't follow her.
I don't even know who she is, really.
But she, I thought she had a very poignant point where she was like, if you are talking about ruining the purity of the game
why don't you spend all day watching d2 and d3 it's because it's not purity you like it's a
fucking talent right it's not like oh this is this is the way the game's supposed to be played no you
like the fucking good players i just think that like there's a like i think of college as like a
a uh grand farm system and i think that when you do when you go down this road it's just gonna be
like there are two professional leagues fine and one like like you're right it is a farm system and I think that when you do when you go down this road it's just gonna be like there are two professional leagues fine
and one like like you're right it is a farm
system yeah farm players get paid
right I think I think that if they if
it goes down the road of like because like minor
league baseball you get paid but it's still like you
have to make it to the show yeah you know I
think that the amount of money that we're talking but also
minor league base like college football makes a
lot more fucking money than college than
right triple a baseball right so they're not it's not gonna be like I'm in the farm and I'm trying to make it But also minor league baseball, like college football makes a lot more fucking money than college than AAA baseball.
Right.
So they're not – it's not going to be like I'm in the farm and I'm trying to make it to the league.
It's going to be like I already made it.
And so you're just going to like play in college, get paid probably like similar amounts of money if you go to certain schools.
You play there for three years and then you go pro.
But you've basically already been pro, which is all like – that's what is like probably constitutional and what is right.
But it is just – that's what is like probably constitutional and what is right but it is just it's very different so if you like the whatever shred of like amateurism is left you like bowl games and you like the idea that these are college kids and they're you know
there there's a difference between colleges and ball games like who likes college football at all
college football sucks but like it's gonna be over for them i i don't i don't play off i think
people like i think it was all about watching all the different games are like... It's going to be over for them. I don't think so. I think people love bowl games.
It's all about watching all the different games.
And they didn't really have a champion.
They just voted on the champion at the end.
But I think now that they have the playoff, all those other bowls
are silly.
Obviously there are some good bowl games, but 90% of
bowl games are silly.
But I also think that people will
get mad about it.
And then they'll realize that nothing changed. I't think it'll change but i think it'll just like
why will it change i i think that like if like like you derive your pleasure from knowing that
like that person doesn't make money on the field like who cares if they get paid or not yeah i i
think what will change is the idea that like going pro is like a big deal like draft day doesn't mean
shit it's just like you're basically i don't know because i don't think they're gonna make i think they'll make a couple of bucks i
don't i don't think it's not gonna be like not like millions but i think it's enough that it
won't be like i think it just changed there's like a weird implication of of taking like a
17 year old guy who was great in high school cutting the check cutting a big check there
and then having that guy and like not pan out it just changes that's what happens with 21 year olds
yeah yeah it happens when you're like an after graduation but like that's like anything else and then having that guy not pan out, it just changes. That's what happens with 21-year-olds.
Yeah.
It happens when you're after graduation.
But that's like anything else.
It's like the implication of changing how many characters on Twitter.
It's like, no, it's supposed to be about brevity.
We can't do this.
And then you're just like, okay, that's fine.
It's like, this is supposed to be amateur.
It's supposed to be about the kids, and they're in college,
and then they go pro.
The idea of amateurism as a whole is just so fucking stupid.
Amateurism, the idea of college sports have to be amateurs,
that was decided when Princeton and Harvard were playing and six people were sitting on lawn chairs watching.
Now they're playing in front of 100,000 people
and it's a multi-billion dollar a year industry.
The people driving it should get some fucking money.
You're basically a professional.
Millions are riding on you.
That's you.
But I mean, it's not like it's going to die,
but I just think it will have to change because
I think it'll actually even the playing field somewhat because I do think they'll have to
be some sort of like cap.
Yeah, probably.
If it's like, hey, come to Alabama.
We can give you like $100,000 and other schools can give you like $60,000.
It's just like everybody's going to go where you can get the most money.
Well, yeah, but that's already happening as is.
But I think when you when that's the thing with – like I said, this is legalizing it.
It's now like regulated where it's going to be like, okay, we know everyone's been paying under the table.
Alabama has the most boosters, so they get the most people because they pay the most money.
They have the nicest stadium.
Like everyone is still offering something.
It's just –
Pretty even though.
Make it available to the players.
Like in Alabama –
LSU just built like a $62 million locker room.
Just give someone the fucking money to get the kids 62 million dollar locker room now but what if that
like is stop what if it's just like you have boosters that are willing to pay i mean these
guys are willing to pay everything to get the new running back right but i think there's a 75 grand
and it's like well i don't need to go to alabama i'll just stay home you know what i mean but i
think that that there's been that artificial cap because you don't want to get noticed right like
the boosters could pay but they had to keep it
under the table. If those kids are
driving around in Ferraris, that calls a lot of
attention, so they couldn't get them a Ferrari.
Now, what's to say that it's $100,000?
What's to say that a quarterback can't get a $5 million
deal? A 17-year-old coming out of
high school with a $5 million deal.
If there's no regulation over it?
Trevor Lawrence.
Trevor Lawrence would be getting pro money.
People are already talking about being the number one pick
after he had one good freshman season.
If it was up to the fucking hillbilly boosters who have all the money,
they're like, give it all to him.
Because they're going to think of it as like, this is our pro.
This is our league.
Right.
I think it changes in that it makes it a little bit more like the NFL
where you're going to be talked about if you just got a big deal.
If you're just the number one recruit and you go there
and you're the quarterback that's supposed to change the tide,
but then you just don't, it's just like, well, all right,
we thought that he was going to be a hit, but he's not.
This guy's now got a $10 million contract?
I mean, college athletes are already in a lot of trouble anyway.
What do you mean?
I think we in the North don't think, like, it's a big deal.
Like, yeah, that guy didn't pan out.
Down South.
Yeah.
Say you were supposed to be the guy to turn around Tennessee, and you didn't.
You don't ever stop hearing about that.
But I think if you did –
I don't think you hear about it, but if you're cashing a big check, I think that's a big difference.
If you were, like, the guy who was supposed to turn around the program, it's fine.
But if you walk away with $15 million of that program's dollars, I think it's different than just being a –
I don't think it would matter to like crazy fans.
I think they don't care whether you're not paid.
They don't care whether you make money.
I mean I just think that like there is something to like the allure of college football I think people like.
Like down to like the school bands and the student section and stuff.
And I think when you i don't
know why is all why does that change that i think it will i just think it will i think like when you
when you formalize it i think it'll become much more like pro than it is i don't think so i mean
i think it's like it's like they almost remind me of soccer teams soccer teams are professionals
they have their songs and they have their bands and stuff like that and it's like okay this this
is our team song and also our athletes make money.
Yeah, I just wonder if you'll have the same school pride
if it's like, I guess so.
I guess it's like rooting for a pro team.
It's like where your hometown is.
I go to school here.
It doesn't matter if they're getting paid or not.
Yeah, I mean, I think if paying college athletes
would ruin college football for you
or college sports for you,
I think you have some problems.
I think you're like, I don't
want these kids to make money. You want to see them suffer.
I never think
I'm never watching any sport
at all. I'm like, this guy makes X amount
of dollars. Why can't he pass the puck?
You watch the game. You enjoy the talent.
Yeah, maybe on Tuesday you bitch about it.
But like, you're never in the
moment. It doesn't affect you at all.
Well, Ashford University is the real school.
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Let's get into these voicemails.
And then we got Rhett and Link and Jason Nash.
Two guys, Rhett and Link and Jason Nash.
YouTube sensations, vlogger extraordinaires, big-time views on YouTube,
and book writers and commercial creators, the whole nine.
So a couple very creative media studs on later in the show.
But first, let's get into these voicemails.
Hey, guys, KFC,
Fikes, Super Saiyan BC.
With Halloween coming
up, I figured that we'd rehash
an old KFC radio question.
I believe back in the day
there was a Barstool Frankenstein where
you guys made up the worst qualities
in every Barstool personality
and made it into one body.
That was back in the day when you guys had like 15 people.
Now you guys have like 100 people.
How would you make the new Barstool Frankenstein?
You can make him like a huge ogre, like the size of large with, you know,
Glenny's chin or something like that.
Or you can make him like a small za with like Riggs's eyes that sounds like,
I don't know, Marty Mush.
You can do whatever you want.
All right.
Anyway,
I already,
I'm already cooking here.
Hey,
okay.
Explain to me the barstool Frankenstein.
Right.
We're taking,
we did this many years ago,
but there was only like five of us.
Oh,
so we're just doing it.
So it was like El Prez's nose.
It was like,
you know,
we just had my hands.
Yeah.
So we'll do that.
El Prez's nose,
John's hands,
chaps face.
Come on. Come on. i think chaps looks handsome
i think chaps looks great john i think chaps looks nice maintain your credibility
think about the future maintain your credibility i think uncle chaps looks great he's my best
friend he's so funny and handsome okay so okay not chaps's face um
i think you'd have to go with like large's body but zaz like limbs like a big white body with
like tiny black and black legs and arms a great answer uh glennie's hairline yeah glennie's got
that weird hairline where it's like almost like a dracula chewed up yeah he's got like a widow's peak but there's also like a couple like divots in it almost it
feels like he's got like like somebody chewed his hair uh riggs's eyes like whether or not those are
really fixed i don't know you know what do you mean like certain pictures certain people say
like it's gone yeah there are sometimes it's like that's you know if you're gonna mess well
i guess we could do chef's eyes we know those ones are fucked up could do like uh something something on vibs like something small from vibs penis
probably he's probably got a thin dick vibs probably has a thin dick this dick is probably
as thin as a fucking eight and a half by eleven i mean he looks like your guy jordy so this is
dick he doesn't like jordy yeah jordio Nino. Yeah, he's got a razor thin dick.
We gotta put someone's boobs on it.
I'm scared to say anyone, but...
A female's breasts.
Glennie's breasts.
We'll take Glennie's tits.
You put that all together and you...
You give them my sense of fidelity and you're good to go.
There you got a monster.
We've created a monster.
What a fucking answer, Kevin.
Next voicemail.
That was really well done.
What's up, boys?
Hypothetical for you guys.
So in an alternate universe,
your body has to sleep for 12 hours a day,
but you get a choice. You can either be awake while the sun's to sleep for 12 hours a day but you get a choice you can either be
awake while the sun's up for those 12 hours or in a sleep while the sun's down the whole time
or vice versa let me know what you guys think that's a good question would you rather be
nocturnal or it's a super easy question you want to be nocturnal yeah yeah yeah stay nocturnal yeah
it's it's people who aren't nocturnal but i mean to be fully by the way fully nocturnal. Yeah. It's people who aren't nocturnal.
But I mean, to be fully, by the way, fully nocturnal is a little weird, but you do get
fucked up when that happens.
But it's still perfect.
I know, but it's not like you used to work the night shifts and you just get fucked up.
It's just like your body is just not like programmed to do that.
And especially when the rest of the world around you is not doing it.
You just get fucked up.
Yeah.
I mean, Kevin, like a pretty fucked up ballgame.
Yeah, that's true.
It's probably because you're basically nocturnal.
But like if you're not nocturnal, you don't even get what I'm saying.
Yeah.
But like it's so peaceful and just like you're alone.
Well, we always say like the 3 a.m. hour is when like there's no games on.
There's nothing to tweet.
There's nothing to do.
It's just silence.
But in this hypothetical, would you have to work then too?
Yeah, so that's weird.
Working at night is the worst.
Just being awake at night, not bad.
But if all you have is 12 hours and you have to work eight of them, I can't.
That's terrible.
That's why I do most of my work anyway.
Like my ideas all come at night.
No, but going to work is. No, is no yeah yeah going to the office is different so when you pick the daytime you guys you get you get the two
birds one stone it's like work hours no it's the same thing either way you're working for eight of
the 12 hours you're asleep yes right awake so either way that that's that's that's the situation
either way it's not great but the oh i just can't even describe the peace you feel at night.
I don't get morning people.
Shut up.
You suck.
People work out in the morning?
People work out in the morning?
The worst thing about morning people is how they love to tell you that they're morning people.
How often do you see it on Twitter?
It's like, if you're up early, I'm going to tweet so I let people know that I'm up.
I get people who are just like,
you're just getting in the office now?
Yeah, I got a different job than you.
I'm going to tweet you at 11pm tonight.
What are you, home in bed?
It's just the other side of things, you dickhead.
I don't work a shit job.
Someone tweeted me recently,
like, geez fights, just so you're strolling down
3rd Avenue,
taking your time for it being 10.30 in the morning. Yeah. tweeted me recently like Jesus fights just so you're strolling down 3rd Avenue like taking
time for being 1030 in the morning
yeah I didn't I don't need to be I didn't have
shit to do until 3 p.m. so actually early
I was getting there wicked early
off but like also
people who like like day people
or morning people which I consider
the same
they'll be like
they love bragging about it.
Like a vampire,
like Daywalker.
Yeah.
But they're always like,
they always love bragging about it.
It fucking blows my mind.
It's just like,
the number of hours you're awake
doesn't,
what is that,
like the online meme?
Like,
it's not a personality, dude.
Being up early
is not a personality trait.
My dad does it the most.
My dad's like,
I'll wake up
when I'm staying at home.
I'll get up at like 10,
10, 30, 11.
He'd be like,
I was up at 6 o'clock this morning.
I don't fucking care, Dad.
All right.
And then guess what?
You're going to nap at 1 p.m.
Yeah, right.
You're going to run out of gas.
You're not going to be going strong.
I'm going to be here until 3 a.m.
Yeah.
Fucking catch me.
It's a marathon, man.
I feel like I'm going to pick the daytime just to kind of be normal.
Because I don't want to have to get lumped in with the night weirdos like you the night the night where's we're a special breed yeah yeah special breed
the next way i'm putting it fucking weirdos next up what up kfc fights super producer bc
uh first time long time uh just got a would you rather uh it's a little bit fucked up but
you know whatever uh okay so would you rather have your dog for, I don't know, 14, 15 years,
whatever dogs usually live for. Uh, but when it dies,
you have to eat it or would you just never have your dog at all?
So you lose all of the memories and all the good times when you were growing up
with the dog that never happened, all that, you know, happiness and whatnot and whatnot, or would you rather eat the dog after he had a great life?
So see what you guys think.
This is a no-brainer.
Let me know.
This is an absolute no-brainer.
Never have a dog.
Never have a dog.
Okay, yeah.
Absolutely.
Not even fucking close.
No fucking brainer.
I've had many years without a dog that's like, you can get by that.
You eat your own fucking pet dog, you're scarred for life.
You're fucked.
You're a fucking lunatic.
I mean, like, with a knife and fork?
What are we talking about?
Do you put it on a spit roast and cook it up?
Yeah.
Do you prepare it?
No, I mean, you cut it up.
You have to, like, cut it up.
No way.
And then cook, like, a leg or a tit.
Tit?
Breast.
That's what most people eat on animals.
I know.
Chicken breasts.
Dogs have breasts?
I mean, they got things that fucking have milk ducts in them.
I don't know what you call it.
But that's not really what the meat of a breast is, right?
Breast is just like your chest muscle, right?
I think so.
No, it's chest fat.
You're not actually eating a titty, right?
No, because muscles are tough.
Chicken, like when you eat a chicken breast, you're eating chicken fat?
No, you're eating chicken meat.
Yeah, you're right.
Either way, I'm not eating a dog.
No way.
Absolutely.
If I had to eat my dog, I would just immediately commit suicide.
I feel like if we put this out on Twitter, it'll be a 100% poll.
It'll be the first one ever.
I don't think people are doing this.
I don't think anyone is.
Even if you would, you're not going to admit it yeah people are afraid to admit anything weird
about dogs you know they'd be like you got canceled right the if you're that's actually
one of the funniest uh bits in always sunny in that episode with the the wolf cola when dennis
doesn't like dogs yes but like that's what's causing them to get canceled so he's like he's like yeah no i just i don't like random animals just l But like, that's what's causing them to get canceled. So he's like, he's like,
yeah,
no,
I just,
I don't like random animals.
Just licking me.
Yeah.
Like he's presenting sound arguments.
Yeah.
You're right.
Like,
yeah,
it's,
that's disgusting.
Yeah.
I don't want like your asshole all over my fucking couch.
That's pretty fair.
Yeah.
But no,
you're the weirdo.
Uh,
one more voicemail.
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I think, yes, they will pull it off.
I mean, Scherzer's on the mound.
I mean, Scherzer's on the mound.
Scherzer versus Granke.
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Because then all of a sudden you've got to go to your bullpen
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hey kc fight bc so i was having a conversation with my friend the other day and i asked him i
was like do you know how like what do you think about when women masturbate like how do you think
they do it and he was, pretty much the typical scenes.
It's like you see in movies, like, in the sheets late at night by yourself
or in the bathtub.
I would argue that women do it just the same way as men do.
I will literally sit on my couch for, like, six hours on a Saturday
and just, like, blow through Netflix and just masturbate literally all day.
And I just was wondering what you guys think
that women do when they masturbate.
Like, what is the scene you imagine?
Yeah, let me know.
Let's look up this girl's phone number.
I'll tell you what the scene I imagine is.
I'll tell you what the scene's going to be for me later.
It's going to be me listening to this
voicemail on my couch.
I mean, what the hell was that?
By the way, that's not how...
It's not possible for us the same way. To sit on the couch
and just blast off, there's a mess
for us. There's reload time.
There's probably kind of a ceiling.
I feel like that's not how it's going to be.
I don't have a ceiling. Really? No.
What's the highest you've gone recently?
I don't know.
Ten?
In a day?
No.
I've definitely macerated ten times in a day.
Recently?
Relatively recently?
Relatively.
Like, not 18 years old?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
No, no, no.
Ten?
It wasn't, like, the last year.
Yeah.
By the way, next Wednesday is the anniversary of the 6-12-18-24 challenge episode.
Not when Dave did it.
I don't know when that was, but the episode that we released in 2015.
Next Wednesday.
So you could do that, by the way, because I used to say the biggest problem is actually the jerking off.
I'll do 24 as a fucking jerk off one.
Dude, I'm so good at coming. is actually the jerking off. I'll do 24 as a fucking jerk-off one. 10?
Dude, I'm so good at coming
that I don't ever bring it up
because I feel like it's like...
I'm embarrassed by how good I am.
You're bragging like you're rubbing it in?
I could jerk off three times
before this episode ends.
On your 10th jerk-off,
are you cumming cum?
Not really, no.
Yeah, it's more like uh it's just flexing
yeah yeah yeah it's just like it kind of just drips out are you sure you're coming like you're
sure you're like you're doing this to completion i you know i might not know how to organize yeah
i don't think you know what that might be the issue it might not be like i'm good at coming
girls it's like you've had an orgasm right and girls like yeah it's like, you've had an orgasm, right? And the girl's like, yeah. It's like, nah, you would know. Like, you should know when you cum, John.
I probably do.
If you have to say probably, you're not.
John doesn't know how to cum.
I don't think I know how to cum.
John doesn't know how to cum.
I mean, like, look.
Look, I have ejaculated semen.
That's for sure.
Ten times.
Yeah, well, usually like the eight.
And then two times it's empty.
Eight?
I unload the clip, and then that's it.
That's just a sheer amount of time.
Is this like 24 hours?
Brennan, this is probably before I got out of bed.
Yeah, I was going to say, he probably does that before noon.
Yeah.
This is easy.
Doesn't your dick hurt?
This shit's fucking easy for me.
When you're established, you wake up at 11.
Yeah, just hammer it out.
Dude, if I jerk off too much, my dick gets swollen.
Swollen?
Yeah.
In the middle of it.
It gets like a red rocket a little bit.
But it doesn't get really swollen.
I mean, I think of girls.
Look, I don't think I'm doing anything this weekend.
Keep count.
I'll keep count.
I think that most girls are pretty horny, too, and they'll just fucking...
Yeah, well, I don't know.
By the way, I just think you fuck yourself wherever you get horny.
I didn't picture you with candles and stuff.
There's also such a difference between girls fucking themselves versus...
If you just rub your clit real quick, you can cum 35 times a day in the car, at work.
You can probably just walk around your office coming and no one will even know that to me is like the you
know i guess that's what she's saying in the sense that they guys think of it as like a romantic
thing i think sometimes they're just like pow pow pow pow i think of it i think how she thinks
yeah i think of it exactly how you do it exactly how you do it i think that guys who still think
it's like yeah set the candles i do wonder if ever, like, use dildos at their ass, like regular girls.
Like, not point.
Define regular.
Not girls on, like, a cam show.
Like, are you, like, masturbating tonight, and you're just like, I'm just fucking my ass tonight?
Like, there are some who do that.
Really?
Yeah.
I don't think so.
There are some who do that.
I think there are some girls who like butt stuff to the point they would do it to themselves.
Let us know.
Tweet us.
Send pictures.
Let's get into these interviews.
Rhett and Link are two guys.
You know, we're not too much.
The world's not too much up in the YouTube world.
But these guys, they've got a bomb-ass YouTube channel.
They've written some of the most viral commercials you've ever seen.
They got a new book out.
They are, they got their own media company.
They're just big-time comedic duo.
Really cool guys.
Really, really enjoyed this interview.
They're basically what I would aspire to be, me and John, and will just probably never be.
Nah.
We say fuck too much.
Can't.
Let's get into this interview. What did we miss? What'd you miss? there'll probably never be. No. We say fuck too much. Can't.
Let's get into this interview.
What did we miss?
What'd you miss?
Yeah.
Fucking, I don't know.
Everything.
Not much.
A lot of good stuff.
How's it going?
You guys doing a lot of press?
Yeah, this is the first thing of the day, though, so that's good. Oh, nice.
Oh, really?
All right, we got you fresh.
I like that.
Yeah, we drove in from Boston late last night.
We don't need the headphones if you don't want them.
Yeah, you don't.
It's up to you guys.
Okay.
That's good.
We good over there?
How rich are you guys?
You guys have the richest hair ever.
You got rich people hair.
Yeah.
Okay.
You got the flow.
You got the fresh compliment.
I'm so rich, my hair is rich.
Yeah.
Fucking rich hair, man. Okay, I'm so rich, my hair is rich. Yeah. Fucking rich hair, man.
Okay, I'm hair rich.
It's very much the first thing that people notice around here.
Yeah.
Really?
It's a big-time hair company.
People are like, where do you get your hair cut?
What do you do with your hair?
People get very competitive over it.
It's a whole today.
I want to be clear.
I have hair.
I just like hats, too.
Okay.
That's pretty wealthy hair.
Oh, thank you. Not even a wealthy hair. I just like hats, too. Okay. That's pretty wealthy hair. Oh, thank you.
Not even a wealthy hair.
Rich, you basically did nothing to it.
It was just like you kind of stood up.
You stood to attention when you took your hat off.
Yeah, do that again.
What's up?
I like the way you said that, too.
Do that again.
Our boss, who's like the founder of this whole joint, got hair plugs a while back.
All right.
He was getting like an increasingly bad bald spot.
That was getting,
people would like see him walking on the streets
from like their office
and they would like zoom in
and it looked like he had like a yarmulke on his head.
So that was a big thing.
It's been pretty much ever since then.
It's been all like,
who has your hair?
Who's your hair?
So congratulations, fellas.
You know, it's not the book.
It's not the commercials.
It's not the YouTube.
It's not the money and the creativity.
All that. Nope. The hair. It's all that matters. The's not the commercials. It's not the YouTube. It's not the money and the creativity. All that.
Nope.
The hair.
It's all that matters.
The hair makes the man.
But yeah, I'm looking at the book right now.
It's wild to see how much the world is now a place where you don't just do one thing.
And you can do it all and do it at the highest level to a real, actual, published book.
So very versatile. I feel like you guys are kind of embodying how the industry works to a real, actual, published book. So, very versatile.
I feel like you guys are kind of embodying how
the industry works now. Well, thank you.
I mean, it's one thing, you know,
just because you can make
a video in your bedroom doesn't
really give you the right
to write a book, even though
a lot of people seem to think
that's the case. But, you know,
we're really proud of it, and we do,we didn't just kind of crap this thing out.
This is like a two-year labor of love.
It's very much about kind of playing into our lives growing up.
You know, it takes place in 1992, which is the year we were getting ready to go into ninth grade,
going into high school in a small southern town in North Carolina.
Yeah, Rex and Leaf, right?
No relation to Red and Leaf.
Leaf's wearing his hyper-color t-shirt.
I don't know, you guys remember that?
I don't know.
You're a little younger for that.
Yeah, we're right on the cusp of it.
I know what you're talking about.
We weren't living that.
Oh, you missed the hyper-color era.
What is hyper-color?
It's a shirt you can breathe on.
Well, it's a heat-sensitive shirt.
It's cool.
Oh, Rag & Bone just made one of those.
They're cool.
I had the gloves that had an alpine skier on it
that would change in the snow,
but I didn't have a hyper-color shirt.
It's funny because it was so hot
for probably six months.
I'm talking it was popular to get this shirt,
but then it was also so hot.
It's one thing to have pit stains.
It's another thing to be like, oh, it's a hyper-color pit stain.
So I don't think it lasted that long for that reason.
It draws attention to the areas that you're trying to not draw attention to.
It's basically an invitation for anyone to blow on your torso, which I don't know if
you're into that.
Listen, it's half the battle getting people to blow you.
So we're channeling that energy into the novels,
like the things that we remembered.
See, it's interesting you say that because I feel like we,
more so like not a fictional story,
but people always said we could write a book and tell this story
about Barstool and our careers and our lives.
And I feel like I just forget everything.
It's like there's so much good shit that I'm like,
all right, remember that.
We'll talk about that like one day.
I remember nothing of it.
Yeah, for you guys to be pulling things
from what you were doing in 92.
It helps when there's two of you, right?
So if you're constantly like, remember that time?
And then you kind of tell the story.
And so we kind of have this memory bank.
If you're kind of on your own,
if you stay really close friends with somebody
that we've known each other since we were six years old. Yeah, you guys are weird.
That's crazy. That's right.
How are you still friends?
We've been like, what, seven years?
Eight years? I'm done. Yeah, well, it's
a business arrangement.
Well, I love, so you guys
met in, what, you said first grade? Yeah. And then you
roomed together in college. Yeah. And now you're doing
this together. And I love, I just read this back bit
here. It says, like, da-da-da-da like tells their kind of their whole story and then it says they share
an office at mythical entertainment the company they co-founded but live separately with their
respective wives children and dogs just to let you know we do we do go home alone at some point
live separately i mean it's we're like a mile apart but it is you guys have like the like a
milk carton with the string like walkieie-talkies in bed, you know?
You still up?
Yeah, it's a little uphill to your house.
I think your son decided to...
Locke and I rode our bikes to your house once.
And halfway, he was like, Dad, I'm going to push it.
I was like, you can't push it, son!
Push the bike up the hill?
McLaughlin's don't push
you ride
McLaughlin's pedal
so you
yeah cause it was
downhill all the way
to my house
you were happy
when you got to my house
I would've pedaled
this is the difference
between my relationship
with my son
and my relationship
with my dad
if my dad told me
that McLaughlin's don't push
they pedal
I would've pedaled
my son was like
I'm still pushing
it didn't work
we're changing
we're changing course, Dad.
Yeah, right.
McLaughlin's are different now.
I'm like, okay.
It's 2019.
The next generation says we push.
Yeah, right.
And I told my son, I was like, hey, let's ride our bikes to Rhett and Locke's house.
And he was like, nah.
And you can coast almost the whole way.
Back.
We have the right direction.
Push it hard going
and then coast back.
How old are your kids?
My oldest is 15.
15?
Yeah, my oldest is 16.
I feel like that's gotta be
a cool...
I don't know.
I feel like they're probably pretty...
It's pretty cool to have
your dads like this.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, my dad's in insurance.
He didn't really get the ladies
when I was in high school.
But you gotta think. He didn't really get the ladies when I was in high school. But you got to think.
He didn't have hair like you guys.
My dad's bald.
But also, think about if you're 14, you're a freshman in high school,
and you roll into the lunch and people come up to you and you're like,
hey, isn't your dad that dude on YouTube that eats goat testicles?
It's like, I don't know.
Yeah, you guys will eat pretty much fucking anything.
I think,
you know,
my two kids play it a different way.
Cause my older son is like,
I don't want people to make the association,
but my younger son,
like he went,
he started a new school in like the first day.
Uh,
when the kids was like,
isn't your dad a YouTuber?
He was like,
yeah,
he's a YouTuber.
You can play it both ways though.
But I guess as he gets
a little bit older
he might become a little more
self-conscious
oh I'd be riding the coattails
is that something
where you said
like kind of YouTuber
you said it like
almost like it has
I think there was a time
when it had like
connotation to it
yeah
like a bigger connotation to it
we used to talk about it all the time
we've been doing this for 10 years
and like
I used to say
the most difficult part of my job
is explaining what I do
without saying
podcaster or blogger.
Because it would be like my parents would be like, no, you're not dating my daughter.
You're a blogger.
Get the hell out of here.
Did you guys ever have that weird feeling about it?
Definitely.
We still do.
It depends on who's asking the question, how you answer it.
In fact, you were recently in an Uber.
Yeah.
What did you tell the guy?
I'm not prepped up on my lies, but he was talking to my cousin forever.
And I was like, good, he's not going to talk to me.
And then he sunk his Uber conversational teeth into me deep.
He was like, what about you?
What do you do?
And I'm like, I'm a video producer.
And he was like, oh, what type of videos?
And I'm like, corporate videos.
I was like, what's the...
You didn't lie.
Listen, it's true.
Like, Google's a corporation.
They own YouTube.
I make videos.
You stopped the conversation.
Bam.
No one wants to talk about corporate videos, dude.
You're one of the most boring men alive.
It's funny.
I did a Patriots game once.
They were tailgating,
and a couple people would come and take a picture or whatever,
and then these moms who were right next to us were like,
what are you doing?
Why are people taking pictures of you? Yeah.
And I had a few beers, but I was just like, I make videos on the internet.
Yeah.
And they were like, okay, and walked away.
And all my friends were like, they think you're a porn star, dude.
You make a video on the internet that you can't say what it is?
Yeah.
I never thought about that because I've answered that question exactly the same way many times.
Usually when that happens, when there's two people, usually it's like, okay, there'll
be like a teenage son or daughter, and then they recognize this and they want a picture
and the parents are like, what are you guys?
Who are you guys?
What do you do?
And I just say, ask them.
Don't you need something to
talk to your kid about yeah have a conversation with your child leave us out of it there's nothing
worse than having to like explain to people why you're famous but not to them you know you know
what the worst is for me we've been doing a couple live shows at comedy clubs and uh there's been you
know somebody brings their boyfriend or girlfriend who doesn't quite know who we are but they're
there for fun and you know let's say the boyfriend wants a
picture and take a picture and then i'm i turned to her i'm like do you want one too and they're
like no i thought i was being polite i guess i assumed you couldn't have just said fucking yes
take the picture and not make me feel like a jerk you can delete it right away right away
you don't even have to push the button you can make it i don't care don't make me feel like a jerk? You can delete it right away. Right away! You don't even have to push the button.
You can fake it.
I don't care.
Just don't make me feel like a jerk.
It's even worse if that's after the show.
You gave him all you got.
You didn't feel any value at all.
It's always after the show.
Exclusively after the show.
Terrible.
I went and over-interpreted, guys, but that doesn't sound good.
We got to workshop our show a little bit here.
So you met in first grade i got a couple buddies who i'm still friends with from
first grade but um to like to have your career yeah pan out the way it is it's gotta be almost
like a dream come true in a way yeah it's like you don't have to worry about any other professional
partners or bullshit it's just like you guys have been working seamlessly for however many decades now.
Yeah, it's wild.
I mean, we're doing a tour associated with promoting
Lost Causes of Bleak Creek, and we tell all the stories
from our own childhood that made its way into the book.
So there's lots of scenes, including one where there's two rocks,
and Rex and Leaf, the two characters,
they have this system to where if they're on the big rock,
they can talk about anything they want,
and the person on the small rock can only ask questions.
And then they can switch,
and the other person gets to be the inquisitor,
and the other person gets to be on the soapbox, so to speak.
And that's something that we actually did as kids.
So it's like you know
we're very weird
I like it a lot
it looks weird but it's awesome
we should maybe have like one mic is the big rock
and one mic is the little rock and you can only say certain things
on the pod
and it was at that location we actually
we did a blood oath where we promised
to
create something together.
Very ambiguous.
And we didn't know what it was.
Keep it very open.
It could have been a pie.
It could have been anything.
We're 36.
We have to make something together, an apple pie.
Yeah, but so on tour, we were actually premiering a documentary
where we went back to our hometown of Buies Creek.
It might sound similar to Bleak Creek.
I don't know why.
We found the rocks.
We found the rocks. We found the rocks.
We trespassed.
We did a whole documentary about finding those things that mattered to us.
So that's part of the show.
It's going to be here in town, and we're taking it around.
Very cool.
I mean, it's cool when it's – I'm sure there's a lot of creativity that goes into it too,
but when it's just like your life that you lived.
Do you ever feel like it's, I'm still
very surprised when people just want to know
about us. I'm like, I don't know, it's not that interesting.
But like, it seems like you guys have
stories to tell and it's all compelling
stuff that's just like from your
real life. Yeah, we didn't
know that that was going to be the case, right?
Because when we started, you know,
we started, you know, 2006 is when we
started uploading videos on YouTube.
And it was very much like, okay, we're trying to.
That's like when YouTube started.
Were you the first video?
Yeah, we were the first.
It's you and the leprechaun in Alabama.
We were like six months into the platform, I think.
That's crazy.
But we were doing things where the whole idea was like we wanted you to like what we created, right?
It wasn't about liking us.
But then all these people started.
So it was sketches, music videos.
Right.
But it wasn't like vlogs or anything story-based really.
But then we started noticing all these people were doing stuff where they were like, okay, I'm doing a daily vlog.
I'm like opening up about my life.
You're just watching me live life.
And everyone was captivated by that.
We didn't want to really open up our lives.
We were already married with kids at the time.
And it was like, okay, I don't want to do this.
Like, follow me around my house and my life.
Because I'm not even good at social media to begin with.
But that was what started Good Mythical Morning.
It was like, let's just have a conversation.
Like, the conversation that we're having on the way in to work together,
let's just stop that conversation as soon as we realize we've got something good to talk about
and do it on the internet.
And then it was very experimental at first,
but like you said,
it's like people started connecting
with our friendship.
They just wanted to see a friendship
sort of lived out on the internet.
And so we've leaned into that a lot.
So that works, right?
That's what became Good Mythical Morning.
And it transitioned from just talking about things to eating lots.
Yeah, I was going to say, you guys just eat and taste test.
Once you run out of things to talk about, you start eating things.
And we may run out of things to eat at this rate.
You know what?
Just go eat the rocks.
That's right.
Go full circle.
Hey, if it gets the clicks, man, we'll do it.
You know what?
Amen to that.
I mean, especially I feel like once you
you know
you've proven you're funny
and creative
and smart
but you got
you got your live set
and it's just
whatever gets the clicks
let's go
give the people what they want
you want to see us eat weird shit
let's do it
and then you balance it with
okay this novel's
like Rhett said
it's something we really
poured ourselves into
and
how do you find time to do that
I mean writing a book
is no joke
we stretch it out
everything else you're doing
it's been almost two years of us working on it.
So would you block off time and just, you know, I'm going to go sit there.
How's being an adult work?
It ended up time management and accomplishing things.
It's a challenge.
It was a challenge.
There was a lot more nights and weekends on this project than my wife was pleased with.
She's like, okay, if you're going to do a sequel to this,
you need to be better about your scheduling.
This better make a lot of money.
So, yeah, it's tough.
I mean, we are really scheduled in the way that we shoot Good Mythical Morning
so that the episodes can, you know, there's an episode up today.
Obviously, we didn't shoot it today.
We're here.
So we have a great team that's helping us make everything we do
and then continuing to schedule that time.
But, yeah, it gets overwhelming.
But this is so much fun being able to do this
because it's so different than everything else we do.
It's so creative and so collaborative.
And it's also scarier than anything we've done.
I mean, there's some darkness in here that we kind of pulled from our experience
growing up in the Bible Belt, like growing up in North Carolina.
There's lots of expectations that they put on kids to kind of toe the line.
But then there's a bunch of secrets underneath that.
We're like, all right, yeah, it's funny, but let's also get dark.
It gets real.
Well, right.
I mean, it's described as darkly funny, but if you read the the description here it sounds like it's a it's like a horror book of of like yeah yeah this
reformery school that the kids are afraid of and yeah it gets it gets dark i definitely say it's
in the horror whatever the horror comedy genre is whatever you call that yeah uh but yeah so i think
it'll it'll satisfy you know we're big stephen king fans and and the fact that you know he does
he does a lot of stuff with bicycle kids,
kids running around on their bikes,
facing, in small towns a lot of times,
facing sinister forces.
That's essentially what happens here.
But in the same way that,
especially the movie adaptations of It and It Chapter 2
are actually really funny.
I laughed as much as I got scared of those.
We try to do the same thing with this. Well, now the next generation is going to be pushing their bikes away from the evil forces that's right uh well so i mean the youtube uh
is obviously good mythical morning speaks for itself you got the book out uh i mean you guys
are just crushing it and every commercial that's ever been viral and funny oh yeah that's like
such a i don't know about,
I mean, it's just speaking for myself,
but I always felt like I love a good commercial.
Like we were saying not too long ago,
like we don't like Netflix because I want to watch commercials sometimes.
I need commercials.
I need to break.
I want to check my phone.
I want to go to the bathroom and get a snack.
That's a good point.
But also, a good commercial will stick with you for a long time.
And by good, you mean like really shitty, right?
Yeah, so is the bad ones.
So you knew our commercials?
Yeah.
Like which one?
The Chuck test.
Yeah,
Chuck test.
I mean,
and the memes that took over.
When you do something like that.
Well,
that felt good,
man.
It felt good to see.
It's like a walk off.
Like you hit it
and you knew
you got a classic on your hands.
Well,
we didn't know that.
I mean,
the show,
I mean, it was IFC's Commercial Kings,
and we gave the commercials to everyone, including Chuck,
but he didn't put it on his website until the season was over,
and they were deciding if they were going to order a second season.
And almost to the day that they decided not to order a second season of the show is when Chuck's commercial went viral
and it didn't make a difference.
But it felt so good. Well, it was a different time too
because it was 2011 and we had
this pretty big argument with IFC at the time.
We were like, these commercials should be
released on their own on the
internet. Right. And
they were like, well, we're not going to do that. We can give them to
the individuals because we were like,
the whole idea is this is the marketing behind the show is to release these commercials.
Speak for itself.
We were trying to release them.
It didn't work out.
But we had the original contract.
We insisted that the business could use the commercials because we actually wanted to help them.
And so then Chuck put it up.
We didn't even know he was putting it up.
And then all of a sudden, everybody was talking, saying, nope, Chuck Testa.
And they didn't even.
So it's funny now that people,
you know, I'm just glad we're still relevant
so that people, I can see sometimes they'll make the connection.
Whoa, those guys from Good Morning made Chuck Testa.
One of our best friends in LA,
who we've been friends with for two years,
told us like six weeks ago, he texted us,
he was like, I just connected you guys
to my favorite commercial of all time.
He had no idea.
Really?
Because it was just like,
we've done so many different things
and it's sort of changed over the past decade
that a lot of people are not,
and we're not really,
we're in that commercial for a very, very short time.
We always do a little cameo in all the commercials,
but people don't make the connection.
So we were like, oh yeah.
And he's like, I actually, now I really respect
what you guys do.
It took this long.
I never felt that until now.
But yeah, it's proof positive. It's working.
So go check out the book, The Lost Causes
of Bleak Creek. Sounds like a
very unique, like the horror comedy is
probably a tough one to nail, but
I feel like there's too much to do. I have a question, and this is going to be legally
binding. When this becomes a movie, can I be in it?
Oh, thanks for that
vote of confidence. In a crowd scene.
You saw my hair?
Come on!
This is leading man hair!
The front of the crowd.
Well, I mean, he could be
behind someone, you could still just see the hair.
Right, okay, yeah, it's true. Thank you, fellas could be behind someone. You could still just see the hair. Right. Okay. Yeah, it's true.
Thank you, fellas.
We appreciate it.
Good to meet you guys.
You guys got time to shoot a quick video?
Yeah.
So we got this.
All right.
Big thanks to Rhett and Link.
I'm actually going to read their book.
No, you're not.
No, I'm not.
But I actually want to read their book.
Yeah.
Right.
They're really nice guys.
Most people would give me this book and I'd be like, fuck off. You know? That book, I want to read. I'm going to pick that book up. I'm going to bring it home. I'm going to read their book. Yeah, right. So they're really nice guys. Most people would give me this book and I'd be like, fuck off.
That book, I want to read.
I'm going to pick that book up.
I'm going to bring it home.
I'm going to collect dust.
I'll read it.
I bet you want to have a race to read it.
Sure.
You're going to win.
Let's bet 200 push-ups.
No.
I'm going to read this book tonight.
I'm not doing a push-up challenge.
That's for Rocket.
Rocket did your push-ups the other day.
He's all caught up.
He gave you the 15 that he owed.
Yeah, I forgot he owed me.
I wouldn't have allowed that.
What do you mean?
Oh, because it's only like...
Yeah, you got to give me what I demand.
Yeah.
Well, tack the 15 back on.
Who cares?
All right, Jason Nash is next.
Another YouTube sensation.
If you know the Vlog Squad and David Dobrik,
you've seen some of the antics this guy has.
We discussed it.
John was out, so it was just me and him.
We talked about him getting kicked off a plane, pretending to be a convict.
He's done some wild shit.
And an interesting talk, too, about life with a camera around you 24-7 and balancing your internet life with your work, with your home life.
Sharing his location with everybody all the time.
Yeah, the Vlog Squad always knows where you are.
What?
Their location's always on.
So, like, if you're going to film a video or you want to fuck with someone or show up,
roll up on them, they know where they are at all times.
Like, your friends or the world?
No, the friends.
Oh, okay.
That's crazy in and of itself, but the world would be very dangerous.
Yeah.
But these guys are crazy.
Find out about it, Jason Nash.
Lunatic.
Let's go.
All right.
It's KFC Radio featuring Jason Nash, YouTube sensation,
comedian, the whole nine. Oh boy.
Here in New York. Setting him up.
Making people think this is going to be incredible.
I mean, listen, what you've done is pretty incredible.
Would you say you're not a YouTube sensation?
I would say you are.
No, I don't know. No, I wouldn't say that.
Really? I mean, there's some stiff competition out
there, but when you've got millions of subscribers and you put up millions of
views, I'd say it's sensational oh well thank you as someone who's
trying to break into the youtube world it's uh i'd say so so you are all right let's do it
so uh the stand-up comedian career blent like molds into this internet thing which has got to
be a trip right i mean uh we kind of had that here.
There was a guy who worked for us named Francis who was grinding out open mics and late night
sets and whatnot.
We do kind of an American Idol type of thing contest.
He won it, comes here, and he watched everything kind of take off.
And it's just crazy.
I feel like stand-up comedy is a world where you've got to pay your dues, and it takes forever, and it's just crazy. I feel like, you know, standup comedy is, is a world where you got to pay your dues and it takes forever and it's
hard and not say you can pay your dues,
but then also you use the power of the internet and it all can like just
magnify and exponentially grow.
Right.
Yeah.
I mean,
I wouldn't,
I wouldn't say I'm like a great standup,
but I was doing it for probably about 20 years just.
And let's see, before I started just like, you know, off and on about 20 years just um and let's see before i started just like you know off
and on for 20 years i did a lot of one-man shows in like la and stuff like that and then i tried to
i made a couple movies those bombed um and then when i got on youtube and had an audience
um i thought oh that would be that would be cool to try stand-up again and um and so yeah so then
i wrote like an act.
And, you know, the first time I did it, it was like 15 minutes.
And then the second time I did it, it was like, you know, 18 minutes.
And now it's up to like 45, 50 minutes.
So I've been working on it.
I think I've done, I've probably done like 30 shows this year.
Shit.
Which is good.
Yeah, absolutely.
So it's all like working out.
I'm watching a lot more stand-up now than I did before. Yeah kind of get into it we're doing we're not doing stand up we're
doing like live podcast kind of like yeah that's fun too but you know the i mean i don't you know
if there's an audience for something if anybody wants to get up on stage and do something i'm
i'm down for it hell yeah well that's what it's like your your entire you know career and kind
of existence is that you're just down to do shit live is fun yeah you know like last night this girl just stood up i think a lot of the people that watch my videos they
they've never been to a stand-up show before okay which is really funny so they'll literally act
was it yeah like i don't expect i was about 10 minutes in and it was going good you know and i
was feeling good like okay and then the girl just stands up she She has, like, not a lot of clothes on.
And she goes, Jason!
Like that.
And I was like, hey.
And then I said, don't take your top off.
And then she's like, I'm not going to do that.
She's like, I just need to tell you something.
I just need to tell you something.
And I was like, wow, this is like, this is Caroline's.
Like, this is a place where, like, real stand-ups come.
We were just there, like, last week.
And I'm trying to, like, picture it, you know, in the room. If someone did that, I would have been like, stand-ups come we were just there like last week and i'm thinking i'm trying to like picture it you know in the room someone did that i would have been like what people were people were baffled yeah and then she's just like i just
wanted to tell you that you know i watch your videos every day and and and i really love them
and and i was like okay she's like but i bought i bought the meet and greet and i'm gonna see you
in about an hour so in about an hour i'll i'll i will get a picture and stuff okay then why don't we do that then
exactly um so stuff like that a lot of weird stuff happens um the weirder the better though
right man you know yeah yeah and then people come up when people come up after and they apologize
like they'll be like i'm so sorry for that girl and i'm like no that's literally what it's about
right you know what i mean like i'm waiting for a moment to like that to happen i you know maybe if uh you know you're a pure comic and you
you know worry about the craft and the art but you know you're gonna make people laugh we're
putting out videos on the internet you do weird stuff you do funny stuff right the more unique
not even weird it's just unique i've never seen that at a show i'd like to see how you know you
react when when a fan in the audience does that. See where this fucking goes. Who knows? That's kind of what I'm about.
Some guy in Detroit, he stood up in the middle and he balanced a chair on his head
and he was like, put me in the vlogs!
And then the chair fell on a girl's face.
Guess what though? You're going to make the vlog now.
I wish I was rolling on it.
I draw the line there.
It's like if something organically happens,
but people just wedging their way into your act or disturbing the rest.
Yeah, they just don't know.
It's funny how many people just don't know how to act.
They just don't know, which is fine.
I guess.
So would you say the the the stand up comedy
versus like the YouTube world
which one do you
which one do I like better
or excel at
or focus on
or what's your
I think I'm better at YouTube
but
but
I really love them both
I mean YouTube's the best
it's the best job
it really is
you go
you get to go places
you get to
you make excuses to do insane things.
I mean, like we went one time, we went and we gambled $10,000 on a roulette spin for my nanny
to try to win her $20,000 so she could build a fence in her backyard. Did you hit it? Yeah,
we did. And that's something that I would never do if I was just a regular guy, you know? And,
and, and so that stuff like that's like really fun. Like, you know, we're going to Miami next week.
I mean, I, I never went to Miami, you know, but it's, it's, it's, yeah, it's, it's incredible.
What would you say is like the weirdest thing you've done?
Craziest.
Cause I know you've had some pranks and semantics and, uh, I specifically remember the getting
kicked off the plane dressed as a convict, you know, that kind of shit.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
That, that, that was bad.
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we were, we were, we were of shit. Oh, yeah, that was bad. Yeah, yeah, I mean.
We were traveling a lot for the,
we were doing our podcast live, too,
and we were traveling a lot for it,
and we have to, like, we have to make videos.
We have to make them.
So we got to the airport one weekend,
and I dressed as,
and my buddy brought me a Jesus Christ costume,
and he's like, put this Jesus Christ costume and walk around the airport.
And I was like, okay.
I say yes
to everything. I was going to say, well, finish this story
but then I'd like to know if there's anything you ever said.
I say yes to everything and then I let the guys decide
if we should use it or not.
And then when they get mad at me, I go,
well, you shouldn't train a linebacker if you don't want him to.
Because sometimes
they'll be like a nuisance or whatever. So then I, I, I put the Jesus Christ outfit on and I'm
walking through the airport and it's like going well, like people are reacting. They think it's
funny. And I'm like, Oh cool. We're getting some good stuff. And you're like acting like Jesus.
Yeah. Yeah. I'm just being peaceful Jesus or whatever. Peaceful Jay. Yeah. And, and, and
people are getting a real kick out of it from From the kids to the flight attendants, next weekend comes, my buddy brings a prisoner costume.
And I'm like, huh.
I'm like, that one's different, maybe.
In an airport, too.
Just try it.
So it's going pretty well.
And actually, people were kind of laughing at it.
I've got the cuffs on, and I'm sneaking by everybody.
Is there a camera on you, or is this hidden camera type shit?
We don't hide cameras.
It's always just a big AED kind of out in front. That does make it a little different if you see a camera. Yeah We don't hide cameras. It's always just a big AED.
That does make it a little different if you see a camera.
Yeah, we never hide cameras.
We never want people to feel like they're...
Right, right, right.
And then what happened?
Oh, so then we got on the plane
and my buddy said he...
I was handcuffed and I was like,
give me the keys, give me the keys
so I can get out of the handcuffs.
And then my other buddy, Todd,
he said, I ate the keys like that. And so i can get out of the handcuffs and then my buddy my other buddy todd he uh he said i ate i ate the hand i ate the keys like that and then i was like what like what
do you mean you ate the keys what do you mean you ate the keys guys are idiots and they were they
were they were totally fucking with me you know yeah and i was like um and then my other friend
zane he's like he's like you ate the keys you ate you ate the keys? And then my buddy Zane goes,
he goes, we need a doctor.
Like that.
And we're like, and then Todd was like,
no, no, no, no, no, no.
Zane, they're right here.
They're right here.
The keys are right here.
And as soon as they heard, we need a doctor,
they were like, done.
And they were super nice about it.
They came over, they were like,
we're going to get you off this flight and you're going to get on the next one.
Could be worse.
Yeah, and we didn't even fight or anything.
We were like, we fucked up.
You know, you fuck around on a plane.
We're gone.
We're gone.
Not only for a multitude of reasons,
but even just people are miserable on planes.
They got crying babies.
They're trying to get to and from.
It's like, okay, we got our footage.
We're going to go.
So then we got on the next one.
Have you ever said no to something?
Has David or any other guys come across
and been like, go do this?
Yeah, there's lots of things like, can I shoot you in the leg with a gun?
Stuff like that.
Like a real gun?
Or like a BB gun?
It's like said, but it's more like, I don't think he, I think it wasn't, I'm not sure
who pitched it, but someone pitched like a rubber bullet or something.
There's lots of stuff.
Or like someone pitched, someone pitched that spider that bites you.
So they're like, fly to Costa Rica.
There's this spider in Costa Rica that it's been on TV. Like paralyzes you or some shit?
Yeah, like stuff like that.
But you don't die or something?
Yeah, it's supposed to be the most pain in the world.
I can't remember what it is.
What are you, some sort of pussy?
You don't want to do it?
That's pretty much what's said sometimes.
But for the most part, we're not like jackass.
Those guys are really intense.
They're nuts.
You've got to have a screw loose.
You guys are trying to entertain.
They're like trying to, you know.
They've got a death wish sometimes.
Jackass is the best.
The absolute best.
Jackass, I didn't ever do that kind of stuff.
But I want to say it didn't shape me.
It shaped my sense of humor.
I mean, that was my formative years where I was figuring out what i think is funny and whatnot yeah i think
it's funny when you like smash someone over the head with a shopping cart you know like whatever
it is it was we see steve-o a lot yeah and every time i see him like i want to like say like and
then you did that and then you did this yeah but you know it's like i just want to be like thank
you man yeah thank you and like he's nuts and all the pain on your body. Yeah. You've done, you know.
He told me something really interesting.
I've seen him jump off a roof twice now.
And he said, he said he goes, he does this thing.
He goes, well, when I count to three, that's when I can jump.
And I've watched him do it twice.
And he'll just go one, two, three.
And then he'll land it every time.
Like a perfect somersault.
He has like a system to do it?
Yeah, it was totally cool to watch him.
It's like watch him work.
You don't think anything goes into it, but so much goes into it.
Oh, I mean to get mentally prepared for that.
Yeah, you actually see that like Steve-O's like a human being.
You know what I mean?
He preps to like jump off a roof.
Yeah, what he does is fucking crazy.
But you're about to fucking get bit by an alligator or jump off of something or lights up and on fire it's like the only way
steve-o is alive is because he preps yeah you know what i mean yeah yeah totally awesome that's
why it's that's why that the only uh like you know disclaimer i've ever taken to heart was like at
the beginning of that show like don't try this shit at home that was like yep i'm listening to
that no way the the life you described though though, you get to go to Miami,
you get to do all these cool things, raise money,
and have these cool moments, but that's a grind, too, right?
Yeah, it's tiring.
Always on the road, always filming.
It's not normal.
I feel like the human brain and heart and mind and everything
is not necessarily supposed to do that.
So I feel like we're on camera a lot, more so just talking, not
doing crazy things, but constantly on camera, constantly getting feedback and haters and
exposing yourself.
And, you know, people think it's a fun and easy job or a, hey, you're, you know, you're
rich or famous or whatever it may be.
But it's like, you know, it's a, it's a tough gig, no?
I have this one friend, he's an artist in LA and he sells and he sells his paintings at, like, farmer's markets and stuff.
And he does really well.
And he always says, he goes, your life sounds miserable.
Yeah.
Some people can see that.
I think a lot of people think, you know, for us, it's usually, well, you're talking about sports and girls and hanging out.
You know, you don't have to go to an office.
It's easy.
And I'm sure for you, it's the same thing you just described.
But, you know, until you do it, until you walk a mile, it's not necessarily all roses, you know, you don't have to go to an office. It's easy. And I'm sure for you, it's the same thing you just described, but you know,
until you do it,
until you walk a mile,
it's not necessarily all roses.
You know,
I remember for years I was like unemployed and I did nothing.
And now that I don't have a minute,
I'm like,
I literally think about when I was unemployed sometimes.
Yeah.
I'll walk by a Starbucks and I'll see a guy just like writing his novel in the
Starbucks and I'll be like,
Oh my God,
I would love to just sit there.
I didn't,
I didn't do unemployment,
but I had like,
I had like cube job.
I hated it. I never want to go back. I'd had that. But, but I had a cube job. I hated it.
I never want to go back.
I had that too.
But the beauty was come in hungover on a Friday and be like, I'm just not going to do anything today.
I'll stare at my screen and everyone will think I'm working, but my brain is completely shut down for 12 straight hours.
I haven't done that in 10 years.
It's constantly social media when you're at home and when you're in the office, it's writing and talking and filming.
It can weigh. in like 10 years. It's been, you know, it's constantly social media when you're at home and then when you're in the office it's writing and talking and filming and da-da-da.
And it, you know,
it can weigh.
Has it negatively impacted you?
Hmm.
No, I mean,
I don't think so.
I'm trying to think.
Yeah, I mean,
I guess I would just,
I guess I would just like to spend more time
with my kids.
Yeah.
That's probably
the hardest thing.
It's like just any day I don't see them, I'm bummed.
I feel you, man.
I'm bummed out.
I just got divorced, and so I have my schedule, and it's like with them, it's great.
And then even maybe first sending them back to their mom, I'm happy.
I'm like, all right, I get to do something.
And then 12 hours after that, I'm like, fuck.
Yeah, I know.
What are they doing? Where are they going? What's happening? And it's like, ah. That's good. It's just part then like 12 hours after that, I'm like, fuck. Yeah, I know. What are they doing?
Where are they going?
What's happening?
And it's like, ah.
That's good.
It's just part of being a parent.
It's the cost, yeah.
Right.
So we play this game called Answer the Internet,
which the other half of our show is we have callers call in
and give us like crazy hypotheticals.
Right.
And this one I picked out I thought was funny
because for most people it's probably a question.
And for you, it's what you do.
It's would you want a camera to follow you around 24 7 and it said it would catch
all the funny moments but it would also see all the fucked up shit that you do so uh you know
again for a regular person you start to think like oh wow if we had that moment on camera that
would be cool and that moment would be awesome but hey what about the time you said this or did that
how how much are you guys you know like 24 7 do you have a say in the edit do
you you put out your own stuff but when it's part of the bigger crew is there ever moments that
you're like guys i really don't want that out there and it's like tough luck or no everybody's
everybody's really good about that if there's something in there that you don't want in you
just say you don't want in so it's it's actually really nice we have such a great like trust
um like i whenever any anytime someone's filming like I never worry about like what I'm saying or if something, um, yes, I, I wouldn't, I do have a camera following me
24 seven.
Is it really a 24?
I mean, you know, not, maybe not exactly, but it's not like a, you know, we don't go
anywhere.
We don't go anywhere without our cameras for sure.
And a lot of what we do is, um, it's not that the camera's following us as, as we're trying
to find something. It's almost like being a papar us, it's we're trying to find something.
It's almost like being a paparazzi,
like lots of nights.
Content?
Yeah, so you'll literally like,
you'll get in the car, you know,
at like eight,
I'll go see my kids from like six to eight,
and then I go with the guys,
and we'll just drive around Hollywood.
Really?
Yeah, and just,
and there's lots of-
And this is the vlog squad,
I mean, so the whole team, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that ranges, you're what, you're like 46? I'm 46. Some of these guys are younger, and there's lots of, this is the vlog squad. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
And that ranges, you're what?
You're like 46.
I'm 46.
Some of these guys are younger guys, girls, old young.
The youngest is 23.
And then some of them are most, and the rest of them are like in their twenties.
Wild.
Yeah.
And so is there like an induction process to that?
Is it like, you know, can you like apply to be in it?
How does that work?
How do you, how do you become a member of the vlog squad?
I don't know that it's, it's not like we, it's not like we started this thing. Like we're the vlog squad
and we're going to take people. It was literally like, it was, um, you know, these guys were
friends like David and Zane and Scotty. And then they started making videos and then they, they,
they got to like a lot of fans and the fans were like, they're the vlog squad. They're the vlog
squad. And I remember, and then the guys, me in a comedy club and they were like, do you
want to, um, it was really just David.
He came and found me at the improv in LA.
I was performing to like 15 people and I was like doing nothing.
I was like, Vine had just died.
And I had a, what was that like by the way, when Vine died?
I mean, cause it was such a, such a phenomenon, but then it was just the same day, the same
day that Vine died, my movie came out and completely bombed.
So I was like installing speakers at trade shows and then doing stand-up at night.
And then David came in and he saw me do this one bit about millennials.
I don't even remember what it was.
I was really just making fun of millennials.
And he's like, oh, can you come tomorrow and do this in my vlog?
And I was like, yeah, sure.
And then we just kept filming.
You think about like the butterfly effect on things.
Like had he, you know,
been two minutes late or two minutes early
and missed that,
or you decided to do a different bit that day,
or you were sick,
or, you know,
you're still installing speakers or something.
Yeah, exactly.
It could have been that way.
But that's, and that's why I like,
and that's why I,
I,
I admire the way you do things where it's just like,
just do like,
say yes,
go do it.
Yeah.
Like,
because you don't know who's watching,
who's going to see it,
what's going to pop,
who,
you know,
that's the beauty of YouTube too.
Like it keeps you very honest.
It's,
that's what I love about it.
It's an honest job.
Like,
it's like,
like when I used to be an actor,
people would be like, Oh, what do you do? And I it's like when I used to be an actor people would be like
oh what do you do
and I'd be like
oh I'm an actor
but I wasn't acting
you know
you want to be an actor
yeah like I wasn't in anything
maybe once in a while
I'd have a part
but YouTube's great
because it's like
I know that
Monday, Wednesday
and Friday
I need to make a video
and it forces you
that's why when people
come up to me
and they're like
I want to be a YouTuber
and I'm like
start making videos that's it that's all it is my when people come up to me and they're like, I want to be a YouTuber. And I'm like, start making videos.
That's it.
That's all it is.
My favorite is guys who come up and they say, I could blog for Barstool.
I want to be a blogger.
I'm like, all right, what's your blog?
And they're like, oh, I don't have one.
So you don't even do it?
But you think you can do it here?
Yeah.
Do it.
Go.
And I get that.
I understand it's hard to start.
But you really wouldn't.
You really wouldn't.
It'll take you 30 or 40 videos to see
like, oh, this is what I can do.
This is what works. You'll have one
video that will hit. Let's say you go
and you cook. You're like, oh, I decided to make chicken
parmesan, and it hits. You're like, oh, maybe
that's my thing. People think
I'm the funny cook guy or whatever.
You just have to do it.
By the time you were making YouTube videos, was it big pretty much right away?
Was there money in it right away?
Or were you doing some videos that were just a couple thousand views and grinding through it?
No.
Yeah, I was grinding through it for a good portion.
That's just the worst.
It wasn't, though, because it was so much fun fun and it just felt good right away.
Yeah, I guess you're right.
Because when we were doing our podcast, we were early on the podcast.
And for years, there was not even an advertiser on it.
We just still did it.
But I still think those are our funniest ones ever because it was for the love of the game.
And you love the guys you were doing it with and you had your format.
And as long as you have that passion for whatever whatever you're doing as long as like you're good you know like all that stuff you see um like you know none of it none of it makes you
happy you know like fancy cars and all that you know it's really just about you know having a
craft and yeah for sure and loving it does it uh has it become work at all like are there days you
wake up and you're like i don't want to do this fucking video or i don't want to go on the plane
like even if you're going to miami or somewhere nice it's like
i just want to fucking sit on the couch yeah i i want to sit on the couch i haven't sat on the
couch in in months yeah it's been crazy but yeah the best thing in the world sitting on the couch
man oh it's the best you know sometimes i'm like why like i do all this stuff to maybe hopefully
eventually one day be able to like retire early and sit on the couch well why don't i just sit
on the couch yeah why let's just cut to the chase and sit on the couch. Well, why don't I just sit on the couch?
Let's just cut to the chase and get on the fucking couch.
No, but I feel like certain people, probably people like us, just need to do shit.
Put it out, get it out, say it.
So I know for myself, if I don't get on the mic and just get all my shit out, I don't know what would happen.
I think I'd explode.
I think I'd lose it.
Are you like a big Howard Stern fan?
I mean.
Or were you?
Yeah, yeah.
Like I mean, I definitely admire,
yeah, I'm a New York guy.
I'm more like a sports radio guy as well. So Mike Frances and a lot of those guys I admire.
But then I do.
Who's the guy that's always on Howard?
He talks like this, Mike.
Mad Dog Russo.
Mad Dog Russo, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Mike and the Mad Dog were like,
yeah, that's my thing
but howard you know certainly is the the of course the fucking the goal sure sure gold standard
especially what we do with you know sometimes letting it fly and saying whatever but yeah i
mean i think it's part of the you know your dna or whatever to get it all out last night i i mean
i'm currently engaged in a uh parking war with my neighbor oh no so i parked we have to move our car
on opposite sides of the street
because there's street cleaning.
Right.
And he left a note on my car saying, like, don't park here.
Okay.
And I saw that note.
And as pissed off as I was, like, fuck this guy
because it was so condescending the way he wrote it.
Yeah.
I was like, yeah.
Like, we're going to do this now.
We're going to talk about it.
We're going to fight.
Right, right.
Part of me is like, it's sick when part of me is like happy.
It said, so I live near the train station right and he thought that i was from another town and that i drove close to the train station but didn't want to pay for parking and just took up
a neighborhood spot so he wrote uh don't walk from here to the train station when you can just
park there after all you don't live here i live like right across the street from him he just
doesn't know it right so and that after all just drove me and he turned my mirror and he put it on my mirror
and turned it i was like that's clearly just so completely wrong like i wouldn't even be mad at it
i mean i would just be like hey bud i live here well so i wrote i didn't know who it was though
so i wrote back on the note um um, like, yes I do.
And I went to put it back on the mirror and put it on his car.
I was, I put it, I left my car where it was.
So I figured it was that house and I put it on the window where you can see it.
And, but if he had just said like, if he had just said, you know, on your own car, you
wrote, yes I do.
Had he been like
oh like shoot
my bad sorry
I would have been like
alright cool
you're still a dick
but like whatever
but he
he doubled down
so
you know
stuff like that
but part of me is like
okay
yes let's go
when I lived in New York
those are the things
that I
was not sad to see
yeah I was gonna say
it's super unhealthy
and terrible
for like your psyche
and your emotional well being
but hey it makes for a good story so Caroline's tonight It was not sad to see, though. Yeah, I was going to say, it's super unhealthy and terrible for your psyche and your emotional well-being.
But hey, it makes for a good story.
So Caroline's tonight?
Caroline's tonight.
Live on stage.
It's a great club.
It's an awesome spot.
Really fun.
Great people in there.
It's an experience for sure.
Yeah, they really care about the comics.
This is awesome. You come in and they're like, oh, what are you doing?
They'll talk to you about the set after
yep
it's really nice
so you got the stand up
thing going
obviously the vlog
is a monster
vlog squad is you know
taking over the world
doing the vlogs
so you know
go check them out
Jason Nash
he's all over the place
go see him
I feel like you know
you gotta see someone
live in the flesh too
to really get it
so make sure you go
see him on stage
and check out the vlog
and we're gonna go
answer the internet
you ready?
ready
let's do it