KFC Radio - Jackie Explains What Got Cut From Surviving Barstool | Yannis Pappas Interview

Episode Date: August 30, 2022

- Jackie breaks down the behind-the-scenes of Surviving Barstool, along with parts that got cut from Episodes 1 and 2 - great Interview with Yannis Pappas including - Magic Johnson looks great - Morning sex is gross - children videos subliminal messages - LIV golf - faking 9/11 loss to get a girl - robbing a bank just to get it out of your system - baseball - and much much more ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Timecodes: 0:00 - Ep 1 Surviving Barstool 12:34 - Ep 2 Surviving Barstool 29:13 - Yannis Pappas Interview Gametime: Download the Gametime app at https://barstool.link/GametimeApp and redeem code KFC for $20 off your first purchase (terms apply). Mattress Firm: To Unjunk your Sleep, go to https://barstool.link/MFRMBSS or a Mattress Firm store today and speak with a Sleep ExpertYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Crying over you. See, even when I'm doing it, I want to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Mangina Dance. Oh, my God. Check one, two, three, four. Sorry.

I'm feeling really awkward today. Today? Today? Check, check. How long have you been working here, Jacqueline? Well, how long have you been just... Technical two years, but like one and a half here.

Really? You worked here six months not being on KFC Radio? Yes, I worked here six months. No, no. She was an intern for six months before. But you've always worked at KFC Radio. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, I've always been. I mean, it's perfect because I was going to say, in two years, not even one ounce less awkward.

We're not getting better in that department at all. I can't figure it out. That's why it's amazing. You don't know what to do with your hands. You don't know what to say. Your face, out. That's why it's amazing. No, it's like- You don't know what to do with your hands. You don't know what to say. Your face, you get flustered. It's amazing. And then you would think

after doing like a full week of like content or whatever that would be more. No. But I think- That's why it's perfect. I think I'm like, I just, everything,

here's what I noticed for my years, is just everything takes me twice as long. So if like- Wow, that's a great thing to know about yourself. Yeah. Like when you were a little kid, it took you like twice as long. So if like. Wow, that's a great thing to know about yourself. Yeah. Like when you were a little kid, it took you like twice as long to learn things.

Twice as long. I always had to have extra time, which is like. Oh, so you're dumb. No, I'm like slow. Yeah. Twice as long. That's great. So like I would think two years in is when people start to get comfortable.

So we can look for four years. So in four years, Jackie will start to get comfortable at her job. Good to know. Hang tight a little bit. Maybe it's because all those years you've been getting junk sleep. And maybe now that you have mattress firm in your life, you can unjunk your sleep. And it won't take you twice as long to do things. Because everybody knows when you unjunk your sleep and get good sleep.

That means you perform better, whether you're at a job like this or you're behind a desk or you're a stay at home parent or you're a student in school, whatever it may be. If you get junk sleep, you perform like junk, whether you got a deadline to meet or you got to even if you got to stay up and just watch one more episode, if you're binging Surviving Barstool and you know you've got to stay up and you need some good sleep in only a few hours, Mattress Firm has you covered with the right mattress for your style of sleeping. You need real sleep, quality sleep that actually matches the level of energy you need during the day, and that's what Mattress Firm provides. They guarantee that you'll get the right bed at the right price uh and you can try for 120 nights for free that means four four months of sleeping on a bed and if you don't like it uh you could turn it you could send it back for

jackie would take eight months to find out if she likes her mattress or not but for the rest of us four months uh with that guarantee to be sure so unjunk your sleep go to mattressfirm.com or go to a mattress firm store today to speak with a sleep expert it's jackie the new star flip that hair girl there it is are you famous yet you feel famous episode two will have aired by the time you listen to this episode one has aired by the time you listen to this. Episode one has aired by the time we're recording this. I feel like it was a great showing for the Jackie brand. I like to think so. I hope so.

I mean, you didn't go home, so that's number one, obviously. I won two challenges. And you won two challenges. You won two challenges, didn't get voted off, and were like the focal point of the alliances. I feel like that's like you hit the triple crown. There were parts for sure where it wasn't a good showing, though. I just have no clue what went through your brain.

They cut out everything of me explaining myself. Oh, it's the producers. It is. No, I just want to say this. Also, like how Riley talked about last night, like sloppy gameplay with like saying everything. And I was hoping that the producers would like cut out

something. Oh, sure. That's what producers do. Make you look better. I don't know. That's what producers do all the time. They didn't need to put in every single word that I said. No, they do though, because that's what we do here. It's amazing. Everything that comes out of your mouth is amazing. But then the one thing that they took out was when I asked Tico, I was like,

can I say the cycle thing on camera? Of course they're not going to put that. Yeah, I know. Of course they're not going to do that, but I just, and I don't even know if like- But why you said it, I have no idea.

But why I said it is just like, it's just flustered. Like it's just, because she said it to me. I guess the bigger question is, why did she tell you? Because she was trying to say- Was she trying to use it like,

I have cramps and I need a bed? Yeah, but it's like, I don't care. You don't need a nice bed when you're on your period. This happens every month forever. You should be used to it, exactly. No, just kidding.

That's my favorite thing too when you know that you put your foot in your mouth and you try to fix it and you go just like but you know you know what I mean it's just you know the opposite of what I said

yeah yeah yeah yeah so but yeah four years and I won't be doing that saying I saying Tico's on her cycle like you're from the 1940s cracks me up

okay that first of all that's like the whole thing is like she's the one who said she whispered to me and said she's on her cycle so I thought that was an absurd thing to whisper in my ear yeah that is so that is where you really fucked up because you should have just been like what why are you whispering this in

my fucking ear but uh it came across as you just being like word vomit jackie style and what's really funny is we know this all of us us have seen this for two straight years. Anybody who listens to KFC Radio religiously knows the world is now being introduced to the word. Which is amazing. Like, the world is being introduced to me, and I hate that. It's very funny. It's showing.

But then, like, so in my defense, what I meant to say was, like, it's between, because everybody else I'd nixed out, because Grace and Caroline didn't have to choose between them and then um like the guys i just felt like that'd be kind of like a weird bold move to like bring a guy bring a guy in like for night one so i was like okay don't take a guy home on the first night yeah exactly i don't do that so then it's like it's on it was either tico or kim right and then i was i meant to like be like explaining my thought process like well tico gave me a very convincing

argument just now but it just came out as this bitch honor period that was wild and it was just like as a host I was like okie dokie yeah there's some information okay alright but so that was the one hiccup I guess otherwise

I thought you had quote you were a quote machine that uh i just can't stop winning it's unbelievable w after w after w i mean these are just fucking quotes put them on billboards put them on shirts put them on coffee mugs the l the other l that i took that they took out i mean it wasn't an l but it i was very actually happy that they took this out when so when the guys came to me and they were like we're all gonna vote for Tico and then the girls were all gonna vote for Eddie and I knew that going into the votes because I knew that like I didn't have enough time to sway

them so and like even though like the plan was already like the whole plan was always the girls are gonna vote for Eddie we were gonna vote for Tico and I just never did the math like that's four and four and so then they took out, there was a one part where you were like, what happens if there's a tie? And I just go, like, I just,

so every time people, honestly, when you play survivor and you play jeopardy, there are two games where you just have to have a little bit of basic math. And, and it's, but it's important. Cause like a lot of people don't think about it right away where it's like,

Oh, wait a minute. If I vote and then they vote and I know he's going to vote for her. So that's three for me. And there's only, you know, whatever it may be. Like you just have to do the math. And clearly you didn't do the math. I didn't, I didn't do the math at all.

And then, and then the. All Tico had to do was just follow through with the plan and it would have been a tie. Exactly. And she just flipped and went for Caroline just because of one. I mean, props to Che for just dropping a seed as soon as voting was to begin. That was genius. But if there was every chance that she was just like, what? Wait, I don't know.

We'll deal with that later. Let's just stick to this plan, and I'll deal with Caroline later. But I guess if someone jumped in and said, yo, last minute change. We're all voting for Caroline. You've got to do it, too. And you took it. But I think that if he'd asked me, I would have just been like, I'm not changing. That's to do it too. And you took it. But I don't think like, I think that if he asked me, it would have just been like, I'm not like changing.

That's too much for me to think about right now. So I, it was smart that he, I mean, first of all, it was just a smart move in general, but he did the right thing. It works like crazy. But so you, you, I think being like the go between, in between the girls and the guys is a, is a interesting spot. Like it's a, it's when there's two things that go on with Survivor. You want to win the money and the guys is a is a interesting spot like it's a it's when there's two things that go on with survivor you want to win the money and all that shit but you're also like there to be

to get exposure and to be on camera and to all that and i think that right now you're like one of the major players yeah i i hope so we'll see yeah she can't stop winning i can't stop winning. I can't stop winning. I do feel like, again, I wish going back and kind of what they were saying in the after show, I wish I was playing it a little bit more chill and being a little bit more coy with everything. Oh, don't worry. As the episodes go on, you definitely get better at it. I can't wait to see. We got to worry at spoilers and stuff. Once it's all over, the footage that we have of you in here standing on things,

when you stand up on chairs and stools to think, is your funniest trait. I'm a nervous climber. A nervous climber. Is that a thing or did you just make that up for yourself? Nervous climbing is not a thing. It's just something that I've noticed about myself. When she's nervous, she finds things to climb up on. And it is so fucking funny.

And for you to play it cool, I don't think it's in your DNA. So I think that what people are going to see... I will say this. The gameplay season two versus season one. Season one, people thought we were just kind of making a sponsored video they came they sat down they talked about it they went back to work yeah they did a podcast they went out to lunch and they didn't leave they didn't leave the office but they they were just kind of hanging out yeah season two was is serious from the jump and you guys were just doing like

12 hours yeah of of just deliberating It was actually the most exhausting thing. Yeah, I don't doubt it. My brain was on fire. I don't doubt it, yeah. There was one moment where I just had to be like, wait, can you just give me a second to figure this all out? Yeah. I felt so bad.

They had producers following us at one point, and one time my producer just goes, he's sweating profusely. He just goes, can I just take a second to breathe? He was pantinging i felt so bad i was like oh my god i'm so sorry because i was running around yeah i mean but that's i mean same thing for you guys though like it was it was i think i said on the after show i would have been like i would have put a cap on it i would have been like i am done like and if that means you

guys are like voting for me then fine but i can't do this for like another six hours yeah you know one thing that like we also had to keep doing was like because you guys saw like everybody kept we would be talking about somebody and then they would walk in the room like there was no privacy so then like all of a sudden like we would all be walking a room we'd be like okay well we're obviously talking about each other so we just have to leave the room because like we're not gonna get anywhere with this and like it it just like happened so many times it was offered we just had to take like 10 minute breaks and then like it would be, 10 minutes on the dot, and then we would, like, go right back to it.

But, yeah, I also think that everybody keeps comparing. I just think the gameplay, like, everybody's going to keep comparing it to last season. I just think that we have it completely different. Like, it's not as hush-hush. Like, everything's out in the open, kind of. I think, like, you could kind of see, like, everyone kind of knew at that point that I was probably working with the guys once I voted for Tico. I was proud of you. They kept the one moment in, though, because as a host, I do just throw questions out there hoping for word vomit.

Yeah. And you were like, why would I say that? And I was like, good. Because usually you do, bitch. I know. Because usually you do just start talking. So, yeah, one example of growth. One example of growth in two years.

So maybe we can get two examples in the next two years. Yeah. All right. Now let's break down episode two because by the time this airs, there will have been a second vote off. So we can talk about that whole process and who you voted off the second game. It's brought to you by GameTime. Now, the stakes are extremely high in surviving Barstool, even higher in the real world of competition as the baseball playoffs heat up, as football season comes around, any live entertainment.

I know Harry Styles is taking over the garden right now. It's Harry's house. You should see. Around the garden is fucking insane. The people who are, there are people camping on, like, the library steps across the way. And I think they're just there hanging out to, like, listen to the music outside of the garden. I don't think it's like, hey, we're going to post up here and then go in. I think they're just like, we're just here because Harry's next door.

I mean, yo yo he's not like on michael jackson's level because like nobody was but he is the next like who else would be the king of pop right now that's i ended up selling tickets i uh since last night we were doing the throne stuff uh we got them for like 50 bucks a pop we sold them for like 175 and it was gone instantly we were like you probably should have done like $500,000. And it was like up in the fucking deck. Nosebleeds. I mean, he puts on a show, dude.

Everyone's got the boas and the hats. Everyone's dressed. I walked out of the office, and I was like, what is going on? There are a bunch of preteens dressed up like it's Halloween. And I didn't realize he was doing like a residency here. He's here for a while, which is so cocky, by the way. by the way like 11 days in MSG or something yeah which is insane that's I mean to sell out like that is nuts are you all jacked up are you going so I feel like the worst gay person in the world you are you're the worst gay well I know that I didn't yeah it's not it doesn't help

that image but yeah I mean um you can't miss an 11 day residency of Harry Styles if you're gay I think every single gay person in the city will see him except for you. Yeah, it seems that way. That and Nick, apparently. Well, Nick sold his tickets, but still, yeah. What? Well, Nick's not gay. I know.

Well, that was the idea. I said all the gay people and Nick. No, for the record, Nick is not gay. Well, to my knowledge. Whatever you want, baby. He's awesome. No, he's fucking – I saw some videos from it.

It was very – Like the crowd When he did What's the one As it is Or as it was As it was The crowd

Every single person Sung every single word I don't think I've ever seen that It drowned him out So yeah I usually don't Obviously like I listen to EDM

Whenever I go to those concerts And usually I'm not a big fan Of when like Like I've gone to rap concerts and sometimes they really stink. Just because they're not really... But he puts on a show. He always shows up in the most

like you said, the most ridiculous outfits. Awesome. Always talks to the fans and everything. Again, he's not... Michael Jackson is probably never going to be touched in a certain way. But Harry is the next closest thing for sure. Michael Jackson's family can fuck off. You know?

It's like he's the new king of pop and a lot better of a person too, so shut the fuck up. Anyway, if you want to go see any sort of outdoor, any sort of live experience, whether it's music, comedy, sports, whatever, go to the GameTime app. You create an account tab. You go to the account tab, create a login, and you can redeem code KFC for $20 off your first purchase. It's the most guaranteed, most affordable tickets in the game because they use technology to make sure the tickets are going on sale at the very last possible second so you can get up to the second pricing as people sell tickets right before

the event begins guaranteed lowest price it's download game time last minute tickets lowest price guaranteed so tico texas was the first one out i think i think people kind of fabricated the a reason like she was late to the first day of taping that really doesn't matter but it pissed people off it pissed me off yeah it pissed like so it was just like you were late we're gonna we're gonna make that the reason to vote so that we don't have to pick an actual reason to vote yeah the second vote was where it was down to like now we're just voting certain people for you know regular reasons yeah and uh you guys went with the most adorable of contestants i know kim well so that was i think like at first getting out tico was like she's just a wild card like you don't know what we don't know what to

expect and like she nobody could like i also this, like, every time I would have a conversation with her, she would, like, evil laugh to the camera. Tika would? Tika would. And I was like, I don't think I can trust you at all. I'm not going to trust you, period. Even this game or in regular life. Like, you just scare me. One time I turned around and I was like, wait, at least wait for me to leave the room until

you start the evil laugh. Like, it was crazy. Yeah, no, I mean, i would vote tico off right away too just because uh i mean i obviously don't trust her i think she's crazy and i think she doesn't quite understand the uh the the game like and everything that needs to happen so i'd be like you you just scare me you gotta go yeah kim let's with with all due respect to a wonderful woman i think she was in over her head completely i I don't think she really knew what this was going to be like. Yeah.

I don't think she realized she was walking into like a shark infested, like we're all going to fucking make sure this is the biggest thing of our lives. You know what I mean? I think she was like, I'll do this video. And you guys were like, this is the most important thing that's ever happened in my life. No, exactly. So I think the move would have been, as we've seen in other shows where you vote people off is you carry a person like that with you and then you have them kind of like as a fallback like well now we'll vote her off or now you know bring

her all the way to the finals and she's not going to win or she can't win the final challenge or whatever it may be i think that was probably the move. I think you guys were like, fuck it. Yeah. I think it's also like, again, how I was just saying, like you walk into a room and then like that person who you're talking about, like walks in.

And so like you constantly are like changing your idea or like having different conversations, like fake conversations and stuff like that. But then it's like at the end of the day, like who's ever not in the room the most, it's like, that's talked about the most. It gets talked about the most. Then like, like who's ever not in the room the most? It's like – That's talked about the most. That gets talked about the most.

Then like we all were just like – So Kim was just chilling. So Kim was just chilling. She like wasn't – she eventually started to like get kind of nervous when we were talking about her. So then she pulled us for like individual chats being like, are you going to vote for me? And like it just wasn't enough like to – like if she had been more strategic about being like okay like if you guys don't at the very end she like said something like to the guys being like i will vote for whoever you want me to vote for if you guys don't vote me off tonight she should

have done that because that if i was if i had a little alliance with the guys the way eddie did with the phone yeah which is a great move uh i would have been like that's what i would have gone to the guys and been like you can do whatever you want with me and then and then just pray that i win him yeah well no you know if i was content kim i would have gone to the three guys and said you can do whatever you want to me um but i would have just been like maybe i'll win immunity and get into the final like yeah full well knowing that my time is coming. The guys will vote me out when it's down to me. But until that point, I'll be your vote.

I'll just do whatever you want. And I think if she had maybe come up with that earlier or pushed that a little harder, she would have been. And then we did realize at one point like – so the guys really wanted to keep Kim and vote Grace out. And the only reason why they didn't was because they asked me and they wanted to gain my trust. I was just not ready to vote Grace out at that point because I still wanted to be friends with her. You know, whatever. And so I was worried at that point, like really paranoid that they would like see me as weak link because I was like, I was like, no, let's vote Kim out tonight. Keep Grace. as weak link because i was like i was like no let's vote kim out tonight keep grace so i that like ended up really fucking with my head for the whole time because i was like i know that this is

whatever but so you when did you say to the guys like can we vote out kim because i like grace is that how you posed it no because we had all come to the conclusion with kim and then they were were like in a room just being like okay like we're set on Kim. And then somebody was like, that's... Maybe Grace. Grace would be the better, smart choice. And then what did you say? Keep Kim. And I was like...

I played around with it for a little bit. And then I was just like, I just kind of feel like, let's just go with the easier route. Let's just like, we want, you know, we want to have like Grace there. Like she's not, she didn't seem like she was going to be super, a huge threat with the challenges. That is interesting if they were, like, to be like, oh, well, like, Jackie just appeared really soft there. I know.

So then I was really worried about that. But in their defense, they did want to. And then at the last moment, so then right before when Kim said that, like, they were, like, was like, I will vote, whatever. They pulled me in, and they said that like they were like was like i will vote whatever they pulled me in and they were like um they were like okay i think we should do grace like kim made an offer let's do this and i was like about to flip and then grace walks in the room and that was the thing that saved her like that was really just strictly because the guys didn't want to like they weren't able to because then they were just like oh yeah like we're just

confirming kim or whatever. And that was the only reason why I should say it other than that. I don't think I would have. Because then I was so paranoid at that point that I would really seem weak. And I was like, I guess I got to go with Grace. Very interesting. You know what is funny? You can say all this stuff and all the conversations that went on.

I do think what's interesting about these shows, you put everybody in the room. And it like, what's the word for it? Like nature kind of takes its course. Like you voted out Tico and you voted out Kim. And those are two of like I don't want to call them outsiders because they're not. They're part of the company. But like Tico is not like embroiled in everything and every day. Kim doesn't live here. It is like I feel like you can talk

about it in terms of gameplay and stuff but i think your brains are all kind of like going the easiest route you know yeah yeah yeah like you don't want to vote out grace like you vote out the easier one exactly the guys are probably thinking that way as well like i don't want to be an asshole i don't want to be a jerk i just i want to have a relaxing night i don't think about it and you might have other reasons but i think there's a reason why White Sox Dave went home the first time because he was from Chicago. Just get him out of here. And Kim's, you know, a mom and older and not here every day.

Like that kind of shit, I think. Yeah. Even if you're hiding it in your own brain, you're doing that. Yeah. You know? Yeah, exactly. It is cool to like the psychology of it all is wild. That's what I do.

Like, I mean, I just wonder how much like us working together has a play in it. Like, I don't really watch Survivor the actual one, but I would imagine that people are obviously able to be more cutthroat. Yes, that's what was insane about this is that you're like,

fuck you. I'm not letting you get $10,000 and you see them the next day. That's why it's crazy that you guys say yes to this. I know, I know. It's so fucked up. It's not normal. You're doing this to friends and coworkers and shit. Usually it's like, I don't fucking know you.

I don't care about you. Goodbye. And I'll never see you again. Also, I think there's so much like gameplays because we're all like, like Caroline's new. Like I'm like, you know, not like I'm just like KC, like whatever. And so like, we're all like,

we don't want to piss anybody off we're not in a position to piss people off your cast is everybody was kind of like jay's new to content eddie's from chicago yeah you're just in the ksu radio world caroline's brand new grace is is just as new as her and just like as brianna's world uh tico and kim are like are very different there was nobody that it was like you know oh, this guy's on the show every day or, you know, whatever. Yeah. So you all kind of had,

you all came in with like being almost the outsider. Yeah. It's a whole pack of outsiders in a way. It's really weird. Yeah, I know. It's cool though. And it made,

I've been very honest about this. When I saw the cast for season two compared to season one, I was like, oh, yeah. Same. I don't know. Like season one was bangers. Like Tommy being the villain. Nick is one was bangers like tommy being the

villain nick is one of the funniest guys brianna at the time i didn't think much of and she turns out to be the superstar kelly keegs is born for reality tv eddie uh uh white socks dave did exactly what we wanted white socks to do trist is hyper competitive za is one of the best characters you'll ever meet and donnie has like more knowledge in his brain than like anybody yeah this time around they were like we want all new faces people who haven't competed yet and i was like that's cool and all but the like the audience is going to be like i don't know these people yeah and i think there were some people initially who like that was the reaction and including myself i was kind of like oh man like i was hyped up for this and now i don't know about this and like there's a

reason why reality tv every time it's different casts and it works every time yeah because this shit is just human nature it doesn't matter who's who yeah what's what it always gets interesting it always gets gets entertaining and like it really doesn't matter i think you guys ended up being just as just as good of a show just as good of cast as those guys. It's a little bit backwards looking too. At the time, season one, I wasn't like, oh my god, this is the most amazing collection of people. It's just that season one was a banger and it worked out and then I started comparing. But you can look in hindsight the same way and be like, oh shit, there's plenty of moments, if not more moments, of great quotes, great backstabbing great turns great all that shit so yeah that's why i think i would imagine it's gonna get less views but like i don't think

well no i really don't i mean episode one was was as good as as uh as last season so a lot of tweets have been like this is so entertaining yeah i mean it really really is it's it's very fun to do and doing it with coworkers is a total X factor that you just, you don't get it on any other game show. Yeah. Big productions, major networks,

whatever. Everybody does it with strangers, maybe reunion shows every now and then. This is like, it's wild to do it with people, you know? So even if you don't know Barstool, you don't know the characters.

If you're new to Barstool, you don't know some of these guys. It is so entertaining to watch them just freak the fuck out oh it's even i'll just really quickly say this i don't know i don't know if they'll keep this or not but like i walked in and instantly saw tico and was like the next day when we had voted her out and like to the bathroom and we had like a heated argument in the bathroom and really and like like today no not not oh the day after the vote right right right and ever since then it's been super awkward like i avoid hallways yeah the only reason like i would not have walked in the bathroom like as soon as i

walked in there i was like fuck that is the worst feeling ever and then i was like scared to walk were you mic'd up still at this time no and that's how i knew it was real because there were no like i was like maybe it's a bit but there were no cameras and she like lit like brie walked in brie saw the whole thing and like she like almost beat me up is brie here right now uh yeah i don't know can you run out there and see if she's there i would love to get that that uh she did because it was funny because like she like she was like i just want to beat you up right now but like and she was like kidding but she like did kind of like punch my sides or whatever yeah yeah she looked like she like jokes but still makes contact yeah

and um and brie just stood there i was like i'm so happy that you would not have had me back at all. She did nothing in that situation. I was like, dude! I mean, I don't expect her to do anything, but I was like, she just watched the whole thing. She just walked in and was like, back and forth watching? Yeah, it was just like, whatever, but it was funny. So then I was like, oh, this is real. What did she say to you, Tico?

She was just like, I hope you get out. The guys, you're working with the guys, you have no if like you're working with the guys like they're gonna get you out like they're just playing you along and i guarantee you that you're the next to go like i'm not voting for you i'm gonna make sure that nobody votes for you um all that stuff very funny yeah no i mean like you look after season one uh i i believe i don't want to talk for anybody but i think they all like took a little break from each other yeah yeah like i think kelly and brie needed some time i think

that's still a little time yeah yeah yeah i think it's like you know there's certain awkwardness that you just can't undo you know and especially at the season one the finale kelly was like like why the fuck do you think you deserve it and she was like well i'm here you're here. You're not. I'm like, oh, these two are never going to be friends again. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They might be cool or whatever. They can be cordial. But it's like, yikes. There's certain things that are always going to be in the back of your head.

So, yeah. I mean, it's crazy. All right. So, Team Jackie is the hashtag. And the t-shirts are out there if you want to join the movement. But Surviving Barstool, every night the rest of this week until Thursday finale. So if you missed it, go back and watch it. It's on the Barstool Sports YouTube after shows every single night

directly after the episode on the KFC Radio YouTube. So catch up on all of it and watch our girl Jackie try to win that 10K. All right, let's talk to Giannis Papas. Brought to you by 3Chi. I know Gianni has had his bouts with anxiety and a lot of his fellow comics in the industry deal with that as well. You want to take the edge off and help with a little anxiety? You can do some 3Chi.

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I don't know what was in the sandwich. So this. Oh, you're going to shit on here? It could be. We should do a podcast where we all do that. Grab a mic. Let's just talk about it. How much, because this guy, he drives me fucking crazy.

How often would you say, if at all, you eat highly questionable food? 100%. 100%. 100%. This guy, he'll eat from a place, get food poisoning, and then eat the leftovers. Yeah. Right after. Yeah.

The same food. I don't believe it. You're a walking example of how much it's not. You're constantly food poisoned and or shitting yourself. It's living on the edge, man. Yeah. And when you have diarrhea, when you make it to a toilet, it's the best feeling. It's almost worth it.

I fucking totally agree with you. You guys are animals. Diarrhea is dope. It's dope. Diarrhea is decidedly not dope. Diarrhea is big. The only argument I will give you is that you can lose like 15 pounds in 72 hours and that's pretty cool. It's almost like cumming.

It's like that's how good it feels. You tear up. You're like, ah, ah. And the longer it lasts, the better. I'll tell you what. I'm not having diarrhea right then. I'm not cumming when I have diarrhea. It does not feel good.

It hurts. It burns. It's gross. I will give you advice. You got to go get your asshole checked out. Yeah? You got to get somebody to peer into your asshole. Why? Because colonoscopy, the American diet, it's gross. I will give you advice. You got to go get your asshole checked out. Yeah? You got to get somebody to peer into your asshole. Why?

Because colonoscopy, the American diet, it's bad. I just had about three polyps pulled out of my asshole. No way. Second colonoscopy. Was it a scare? Like, were you like, oh, shit? No, no. It was just like, we got to get rid of these.

Yeah, routine, you know? But it wasn't like these might be, we have to do a biopsy and all that shit? No. You knew, okay. No, yeah, thank God. That's much less of a joke. No, yeah, that's not funny. It would be funny if I came

and I got cancer. I got cancer! I got cancer. I'm actually here to promote cancer. Check out my special before I die. Bro, that would sell. That would work. Everybody would be pissed

when you didn't die afterwards. They'd be like, well, that was just a promotion. Yeah, that kid's still alive and well. I give him credit dude that you know whatever it takes to get it made get on ellen fucking hbl kid is i think he's healthier than me dog i saw his blood pressure numbers i'm like not only is he alive he is thriving he is an example of health i'll tell you what if magic johnson could do what he did you can promote a

special saying you have cancer what have a kid? Is that what you're talking about? Because we can all do that. Magic came out here and was just like, I have AIDS. I'm going to die. And 40 fucking years later, he looks healthier than ever. He looks unbelievable, man. I don't want to fucking hear it, man. Hang on a second. I've got to pump the brakes.

I don't know if I'm saying Magic Johnson looks unbelievable. Magic Johnson looks. He looks exactly like he looked in 1992. He does not. He looks great. He's a big man. Bro, what? He looks great. He's a big man. Bro, what? He's magic?

He's overweight for sure. We're not talking about Charles. Magic Johnson's absolutely overweight. I'm not saying he looks terrible, but he's overweight. I mean, he's got the weight of probably like a 65-year-old man on him, but... All right. I mean, bro. A 65-year-old.

Yeah, okay. What are you talking about? All right. All right. I'm looking at you. Magic looks great. I'm walking to bed. That guy looks like he's 40. Yeah'll give you that. A 65-year-old. Yeah, okay. What are you talking about? All right. All right. I'm looking at you. Magic looks great. I'm walking to bed. That guy looks like he's 40.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right. You're right. You're right. I had a different image. That's like a 65-year-old man with AIDS who looks shiny and healthy. I think the image I always have of Magic is when he's like, I think he was drunk when he quit the Lakers.

And he just had this chin. He's all balled up. Oh, I know what you're talking about now. He's like, I'm not going to be here anymore. The day that he said something like, oh yeah, he did an interview drunk and basically was like, yeah, I don't know if I'm going to be here.

And then they fired him two hours later. No, he quit, I think. He quit before they could fire him or whatever it was. Yeah, that was pretty awesome. That's the image that stuck out in your head for Magic Johnson's whole career. One of the most physically appealing, visually appealing

athletes ever who did things on the court that you can't I honestly don't think I've ever seen Magic Johnson do anything on

the basketball court really? that is funny I'm not a basketball guy why would I watch a highlight reel from the 1980s you might want to

check where you work I'm not a sports guy I don't even know what I'm doing here no but you know what is funny

because I watched that series with him winning time did you watch that on hbo it was like over the like it was like i guess uh in the winter maybe i don't know it was probably it was about the uh the lakers dynasty and and more about um dr bus buying the team and how he like he was awesome if you haven't seen it this it's all it's fictionalized a little bit so i don't know how real it is but he was awesome. If you haven't seen it, it's fictionalized a little bit, so I don't know how real it is, but he was just like a schemer and a scammer. He bought a fucking sports franchise when he just didn't have the money to do so,

and he needed to borrow from guys, and then he turned that, obviously, it's like the Showtime Lakers. But Magic was not cool with this portrayal of it. Everybody involved was like, fuck that, it's not real. But I was like, that's how you know it probably was real. I want to see. Everybody involved was like, fuck that. It's not real. But I was like, that's how you know it probably was real. That sounds pretty good.

Yeah, that's how you know they were probably telling the truth because you guys are not happy about it. I want to see finally a magic documentary about the orgies and that. Well, so it's not all the way in that, but I do think they touch upon that. It's more about he had a high school girl and he went out to L.A. and became magic. But I want to see the real deal. Have you heard the account of him fucking Isaiah?

I think it probably happened. I mean, they would kiss before a game. You guys aren't European, so what's the deal here? We don't do that. No, but it was one of the guys was saying that Magic would run around

and you had to be fucking somebody by midnight. He'd be running around like, you good? You good? You got somebody? You got somebody? Like, I want everybody

fucking by midnight. 12, the clock strikes 12, your cock strikes her, man. Like, everybody had to be banging. I gotta be honest, midnight's a little early. I like to have a be banging. I gotta be honest. I mean, that's a little early. I like to have a later night.

You look like you're a late night type of guy. Yeah, very much so. You look like a guy who enjoys a nice scotch on a boat with too much sun exposure. Just like a pickled wasp. I feel like in my younger days, yeah, probably I agree. Like, let's have some fun. In my older days, I want to be asleep on my third REM cycle by midnight. So I want to get the fucking in early.

I'll tell you what I love to do. I'll get it at 3 a.m. But I'm having a good time right now. No, sir. 3 a.m. No, no, no. My dream, my ideal night, it can only really be if you're dating somebody, is get home from work and fuck then.

And then I can eat and stuff my face and relax and go to sleep without worrying about, like, I've got to put in a performance later. Smoke weed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All the stuff that's going to anti-sex. You know what I mean? That's the worst when you're with someone and you're like, we're going to have sex later.

You want to hit this? I'm like, if I hit that, we're not having having sex but that's why it's like i can drink and fuck later i can't smoke and fuck just put that down we'll fuck right now and then we'll go you know what i mean that's that's the dream to be on the level like you know i'm there right now married life is is is the that's the time to do it you know that's fucking when fucking at like sundown you know what I mean Clock you know you're off work I do morning That's another one Saturday morning instead of Friday night

You get some lazy Well now we got the kid like I got a baby So it's like we gotta fuck And it feels like we're on like a stakeout For Osama Bin Laden or something Cause there's like cameras of my baby everywhere Fucking night vision and stuff And you gotta do it super quiet stuff so i feel like you gotta

do it super quiet we got yeah and i gotta like you know and the dog is like wailing at the door and i'm just like trying to focus and i'm also fucking my wife so that's hard right it's hard enough going like all right it's still you it's still you and then there's we're still doing the same old thing we've been doing for about five years, huh? Eight. Eight, yeah. Eight, eight. Yeah, that is funny. The morning, I was a morning guy. I was a big morning guy back in the day. Back in the college days, early 20s days. What, because you were drinking until you're addicted?

I loved fucking in the morning. I'm off the morning train. Really? I've been off the morning. I think the famous morning sex scene is Entourage when it's like with E. He's with the perfect head model and she's like, I've never met someone who didn't want to fuck me again in the morning and like I would be like listen lady I'm gonna do it

but it's gonna be begrudgingly because your breath fucking stings and your hooch fucking stings like we're adults who've been drinking and sweating all night we fucking stink and it ruins the mood to get up and go brush your teeth and all that stuff when you're kind of but like definitively we both fucking stink yeah you need like a a a quick little like mouthwash by the bed and like a summer's eve swipe for you or something let's clean up a little bit before we get in there no i i do get that but it's more for

me about like i remember uh jj who used to write for the Yankees. He was saying when he got married, they got on the morning schedule. It was like both of them were kind of falling asleep at night. But Saturday morning was like their time for sex. And I guess like they woke up one morning and she started to like initiate. And he goes, you horny for the morning. And he was like, and that was the moment that he was like, okay, I don't know. I'm never going to get horny for the morning and he was like and that was the moment he was like okay i'm never gonna

get horny ever again no that's fucking you're horny for the morning was one of the fucking worst phrases i've ever heard but it's the reality man yeah yeah the reality it's wild when you get older and you just uh you gotta go when you can go yeah you gotta go and you can go you can't go all the time you gotta go and you can go that's that can go. That is a thing that I think ordinarily guys are supposed to want it and be able to do it whenever, forever. When you're young and dating. And then I don't think girls are maybe all that prepared sometimes for where it's like it's happening now or never. See that? We got a seven minute window.

It's like dark diggler and boogie nights it's my dick I want to fuck now right now I'm the boss to me I'm the boss to me and she's like no yeah how's the baby life it's uh it's good how old she's a year and a half right now so we're you know walking around and doing walking around she's like running towards danger. You find the sharpest, hottest, most dangerous cliff and I'll run right at it. Anything that I say no,

she thinks it's a game, which is fun. And I want to teach her a lesson just to let her know it's not. Just let her run up the stairs once and let her fall down and just cross my fingers and be like, hopefully she's not dead and she learned a lesson. You know what? They are very durable, dude. They are, dude. I putted i've ever dropped there she's alive so i dropped shay i dropped shay oh you're kidding yeah i like that you punched out michael chai i was like fucking somebody had to do it i dropped shay pretty bad like straight up fumble just like

right to the ground and it like shattered me in the moment i was like oh my god like what have i done and uh her mother at the time did not react well either that didn't help it was like it was an accident i didn't do it on purpose i didn't gronk spike her uh but i still felt like so bad and then you realize like absolutely nothing yeah you know and i'll tell you what really really really helped me was, thank God this didn't happen on my clock and it wasn't my fault. But my nanny once spilled coffee on Keegan, my son, when he was young, young. And it was hot coffee. It hit his leg.

And, I mean, he was, you know, hurting in the moment. I raced over there. I'm crying. I'm bringing him to the doctor's office in a frenzy, and they wrapped it up, and he was fine in a day. It was like that baby skin just, they are durable little fuckers. And the nanny stayed on?

Yeah, no, she's the best. It was a one-time botch. I was about to say, that's a big mistake. No, it was, yeah, she felt horrible. You wanted to fire her, but then she's like, I'll report you, then I'm off the books, and you're Yeah, she felt horrible. You wanted to fire her, but then she's like, I'll report you. I'm off the books. You're like, all right.

We got a detente here. No blood. No blood. Except on the baby. I always get so annoyed with that, with parents coming running in. It's fine. It's not fine. My kid's got coffee and third degree burns.

Nah, it's fine. I was at first feeling it just because, like, I was worried about him. But then it was just like a snowball of emotions. Like, I was just so much in a frenzy. I just lost control. Like, I just couldn't calm myself down. So I was either, like, I probably had stopped crying, but I think I was just pacing and, like, very visibly like, oh, my God. And they were like, he's fine.

We're not going to let you leave and drive in the car with him if you're like this. So calm down. And then I was like, okay. That's what I needed to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly what it was. If you're a kid, you freak out. His name is Shea?

Her name is Shea. His name is Keegan. Keegan and Shea. Those are nice names. You'd think that we're like off the boat from Ireland. Yeah. Oh, Keegan and Shea. And my nanny has an irish brogue so they do have a little bit of that like they started to talk that way they talk they have a bronx irish and then from youtube asian fucking accent yeah there's

so many goddamn asian videos on youtube that these kids watch. Yeah, yeah. Where they say weird things. They're like, the color yellow. So they say like, color, color. What is the color, daddy? I'm like, all right. I'll give it to you now because you're young. My wife stopped Cocomelon because she was convinced that it was some sort of like CCP psyops or something like that.

There is some of that shit. Like Miss Piggy or something like that. I don't see it. I watched the cartoon or something like that. I don't see it. I watch the cartoon. I'm like, I don't see how this is CCP propaganda. It's too subliminal for you? Yeah, I'm like, I don't get it. That's how they get you.

You're in there ready to believe. It's not convincing. Yeah, it's like a baby singing, and I'm like, I still don't see it. I never heard, like, capitalism's evil. I never heard that. Yeah, American West has to come. I never hear any of that i don't get it but maybe it's subliminal well there's that there was that uh slender man

thing you ever hear about that on youtube it was like uh it would slide these these videos into children's videos and it was this really creepy character kind of looked like almost like jigsaw from saw kind of weird face long black hair and it said like go kill your friend or i'm gonna come and kill your family and like kids fucking did it because they're dumb as shit they went and killed their families obviously not like these are big like a little bit older wow capable of doing that i don't know i don't think it was like an epidemic like there was i think it happened one time i think yeah there was i think there was a couple there was at least one yeah at least one or two it was it was like some 12-year-old girl was going to stab the shit out of her friend.

And then they had to decide, well, she thought she was saving her family. I don't know, though. That girl's a prick. Yeah. If it wasn't that, she would have done something. Something else. At some point, your kid's going to be an asshole. If that's all it took.

If it all took was one YouTube video. To do murder yeah like maybe we it's good we got her early before like she could have like shot up but done something bad sometimes yeah he's only lost you know a brother yeah no big deal how many videos did she watch yeah this seems like come on you know it'd be horrible but i'll be honest too man when i see a I'm like, they're pretty convincing. They're good at it. Bro, I tell a story, too.

I went to a boarding school in high school, and early in my time there, because 9-11 happened in eighth grade, so loose change came out. And I came home, and I was like, Mom and Dad, you're going to want to sit down. I got some stuff that's going to blow your mind. And they're like, George W. How much money are we paying to send you to that fucking school? You come home, and you're going to want to sit down. I got some stuff that's going to blow your mind. They're like, George W.

How much money are we paying to send you to that fucking school? You come home and your lecture is on how America did 9-11? It's like, look, I saw a documentary. You got to see it. So I'm pretty easily convinced. It's not even that, too. It's like, think about how many times you got got on an Instagram targeted ad. You know what I mean?

I'm fucking clicking buy on shit that I do not need. I bought a floating orb drone toy once i don't fucking need any of that yeah the internet bye the internet just made like uh reality into mush dude yeah like i was actually just texting with somebody we were talking about saudi arabia and the golf tournament that they all and tiger woods turned down that 700 mil yeah yeah and i read an article when I read it that said 700 billion. And so I told, I was saying in the text, like, he turned down 700 billion. And my friend was like, it was like, it was million, man. It wasn't billion.

And I went and Googled it and I was like, oh, I was like, it is million. And I was like, I'm stupid. I'm very stupid that for like two weeks I believed it was billion 700 billion that is a testament to Tiger but that's two things how good Tiger is and how fucking dumb you are yeah that's

yeah that really is the perfect storm the guy who could potentially earn that money the guys who could potentially spend that and my dumb brain, $700 billion. I never even questioned it. I was just like, $700 billion? He turned down.

What a great guy. $700 billion. I was like, nobody would turn down $700 billion. What would be your number to go play? $50,000. Right? I mean, I don't give a fuck. I'll walk right past the public execution and go, thumbs up.

Where's my euros? Because I wanted it in euros. Yeah, are you kidding me? I'm cheap right past the public execution and go, thumbs up. Where's my euros? Because I wanted it in euros. Yeah, I mean, are you kidding me? I'm cheap right now. I really, you know, of course, I would prefer my money to not be attached to 9-11 in any way. But as you said, the American dollar, very tied to 9-11, just like anybody else. I mean, I, you know, people have talked about this a lot recently. It's no secret that all of the money

from any of these corporations is pretty dirty. It sucks when it's, you know, the backlash is going to be people saying directly, why do you take money from people who might have done 9-11? But these numbers are like, fuck you if you say you wouldn't take it. Or at least

consider it. These people are like, I would never. I'm like, mm. Yeah. And they put it like, it goes boop, boop into your account. Yeah. Like, I don't think people realize that. I think it's like a salary or you get game checks or it's over the course of your career. We were told that it was like wired to your account.

You go from this many zeros to that many zeros over an instant. That is hard to turn down. What's your number to do KFC radio in Afghanistan? Well, do I have to go there? Do I have to do it in Afghanistan? You have to do it in Afghanistan. That is a big difference.

Is that part of it? Did I say Afghanistan? Saudi Arabia. They're here too. If I could do it here and I'm just getting my paycheck from them, Saudi Arabia Saudi Arabia okay yeah I mean so yeah like any of that no they're here too they are here yeah the tour is here too because if I could do it here and I'm just getting my paycheck from them

um I mean it would probably I would treat it like any other like free agent yeah you know like it's just beat my current deal

yeah yeah one dollar more than the next guy you know that's really that's fucking cheap bro and I'll tell you

what I would do one dollar more and i'm like what about all this human rights stuff i said one dollar more makes me forget all that what am i doing right now that is like on a day-to-day basis that is you know doing anything for that for the social uh the social justice of it all anyway. I'm not doing any of that shit at all. It doesn't affect me. I don't affect that. They don't affect me.

It is separate. 9-11 has nothing to do with me and my podcast. I get it. That's what they would say. Zowduf protests too much. Where were you, my friend? Why so quick to take a deal

from the Saudis wild story one of the girls here told us that uh there was this guy um by the way if this was show was saudi arabian there'd be no girls here that would be a difference you wouldn't be able to say one of the girls here you'd be like one of the other guys here by law she said that a dude who uh i guess a lot of people here know who's out in New York City a lot told her to try to get her to sleep with him that his dad died at 9-11, and it just straight up did not happen. Wait, whoa.

Works for Pete D. I get why he tried it, man. That guy probably did Legit go, Pete Davidson. Pete Davidson. Fuck you, dude. He's been working for that guy. He works for him.

That is funny. I was just going to say, how on earth would that be in the aphrodisiac? I guess the science is out there. The science is out there, yeah. Living proof. It worked with Kim Kardashian, bro. So these hoes out at Murray Hill,

it probably worked too. For the record, it did not work with know, these hoes out at Murray Hill, it probably worked too. For the record, it did not work with her, but she found out, like, it just is not true. That's open. Oh. I have told many a white lie to, you know, try to impress girls. Yeah. I've never taken it to that level. Yeah, that's a, that's a.

Dead Dad and 9-11 is a level. That's a big. Bridge too far. That's a big one. That's one I would have trouble staying on top of. Yeah, that's a tough one. Not even like moral trouble. I would have trouble keeping the lie together.

Yeah, because it's just, I don't know. Do you ever go, I'm Larry Bird's son? You ever pull that one off? That you can pull off. You can pull that off. Yeah. You look like you could be Larry Bird's son with like a hot woman he married. You're like a hotter

Larry Bird. I stop at minor league baseball player which is a lie. I used to do all and it works because you don't have to like look like an athlete.

You don't got to really be in shape. I just always would go like yeah I'm here. I'm just got caught you know I'm in Columbus. Yeah I'm working in Columbus. We got to hit the bus

in a few hours. Let's get this done. Derek's a good guy. He's alright. You know I met him a couple times. We'll see what done. Derek's a good guy. He's all right. I've met him a couple times. We'll see what happens. And it works.

Because I mean – And it's all about too like half the time they know you're lying, but they're having fun with the conversation anyway. And it's like – But when you start to lay it down like – Again, you're right. I don't know how that works in the moment, but I don't know. Steve Ranazzizzi would be like, that's too far.

You can't tell that. That can't bezi would be like, that's too far. You can't tell that. That can't be your line, dude. That's too far. He was like, I can't believe it's almost September. And he's like, do you want to know about September? What are you doing next weekend? Oh, it's 11th. It's the 11th, right?

So I'll be at the. Glad you mentioned September. My dad died in September, actually. 2001, in fact. How interesting. Yeah, he went for it. 2001, in fact. How interesting. Yeah. Yeah, he went for it. He took a big swing with that.

That's a big swing. That is. Because if you miss, you're just the guy who lied about his dad dying in 9-11. Yeah, and you're talking about it on a podcast within a week. If it hits, then all his friends are telling girls that their dad's dying. Can you believe that? Actually, all of us. That's how we became friends. We met in a therapy group.

It works, dude. Did you see the ESPN broadcast with the last Yankees-Red Sox series with the guy who, they were coming back from commercial, and they put the Yankees and the Red Sox logo, like the square logo, in the squares where the towers were, where the fucking, what's it called? Memorial. Memorial is.

So it was like coming back from the commercial, like Yankees, Red Sox, tonight or whatever. And they just used the 9-11 memorial site and put the logos in the fucking holes. I didn't see it. I mean, Jesus. Never forget. My dad died on the 11th. He's getting a little. That would have been the card to play.

Imagine it's that same guy. My dad died on 9-11. Might as well just show pictures of people falling out of windows. That is the one thing. That's where they drew the line, by the way. That's where we know that the media will draw the line. People jumping out of windows. Yeah, that's where they won't exploit.

They won't. Good for you guys. It could be at a Budweiser commercial at some point. Is that a sponsor? I don't want to fuck it up. Like 20 years from now, the 40th anniversary, we're doing that. Yeah, the commercials, they love to tug at your heartstrings. That's like a real marketing ploy.

You cry at commercials? Yeah, Budweiser ones. Those get you. Yeah, the horses with the Dalmatian. You were about to say Klondike, weren't you? I was about to say Klondike bar. The Klondike horses? Yeah.

I'm a moron. It's a Klonsdale, right? Klonsdale. Klonsdale, yeah. It's funny, those commercials, because you're like, what does this have to do with beer? And they actually go like, nothing. We're just trying to like manipulate you into feeling we just want you to feel like we will break you down yeah and make you impressionable

yeah and then shove the beer in your face yeah and that's what you want yeah it's like the same thing it's like what does lebron james have to do with sprite i know his nutritionist does not allow him to drink sprite but like you're just like oh lebron drinks it so i'm gonna do it too i better do i still don't know if i believe it. Like there has to be some – obviously there's got to be some truth to it all. But I'm like, is there? Because sometimes I just think that like marketing execs want to keep getting paid. So they tell you that you need this. And brands are like, well, we have to do it because they're doing it.

And then people are like, I guess it's working. I don't know. Sometimes I think the whole fucking thing is a sham. What do you mean? Like brand advertising. Like obviously promo code shit you can see like i said the bike you bought it it worked you needed a product i gave it to you but you know the idea of like are you drinking bud light instead of coors light because uh are you drinking coors light instead of bud light because you know of a podcast or because i saw the commercial yeah is it yeah, yeah. Is it, you know? It gets in there.

It's awareness. It's worming in there, you think? I could tell, yeah. Like, just like if you think about it, like I could tell you like every commercial, it's in my brain, but if you asked me any like historical fact I learned in school,

I would have no memory of it. Right. That's why they should probably have like advertising agencies teach school. Right. You'd remember it, dude. Memory, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like some hot chick coming in with tits

fucking puppy running and they're like abraham lincoln died on this day just titties and fucking that's just in there it's not a bad idea it's like uh what they do in marvel like captain america teaches the lessons yeah you're like lebron james sit down and be like let me tell you here's how long division works I might know how to do long division right now. But if Usher came in and he was like, I remember it. Carry the one. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I remember. I remember somehow. I think if you could teach a college course on anything in life. How to start a podcast. How to start a podcast. How to start a podcast or an OnlyFans page. That's what I would say, girls.

We can't escape it. We talk about it literally every episode now, but it's just a full-blown revolution. OnlyFans is... We've got girls here doing it now, and every girl that I meet, I'm basically like, you should have an OnlyFans,

and they laugh, and then I tell them, and they're like, oh, I should. It's a very, very real thing. But the broader idea is like entrepreneurship. It's like you can just make money on your own now. But you would teach how to make money for yourself.

I would be a female-only course. I'm starting an OnlyFans page. And I'd go, okay, my job is to watch. Go. I will be the quality assurance for your OnlyFans page. No, it would be, yeah, something like that. Because, you know, now everything's decentralized. So, yeah, some sort of entrepreneurial content creation.

What would you teach? Or what would, you know? I would not be able to teach anything. So what would you – what's the thing you most wish you knew and that it could have been taught to you in school? I have no idea. I'm going to try and think of something, but I have absolutely no idea. I, to this day, know nothing of value. I know nothing.

I know fucking nothing. This isn't like a joke this is like I am so fucking worthless if if if you can go back in time if I can go back in time in two weeks and bet on

something that's happened I wouldn't be able to what happens tomorrow I have no fucking idea I don't have any memory I don't know every day I wake up is just a new day you live like memento a fresh piece of meat I don't have any memory. Every day I wake up is just a new day for me. You live like memento. I'm a fresh piece of meat.

I can be molded however you want. I walk in here every morning, introduce myself to Kevin. I'm like, I'm Kevin. Dude, that's exciting. See what I mean? Everything's new all the time. Brand new day. You're like, who's president?

You're like, wow. Fuck, he's president, dog? The first dates type shit. I'll just fucking teach you the new... Dude, I don't know anything. I don't know. So you know so little, you can't even think what you would want to know?

I don't know. I can't even follow the question. What do you wish you understood most in this life? What do I wish I understood? Nothing. I don't... I don't... Dude, your brain is useless? Nothing. I don't. I don't. I do.

Your brain is useless. What you guys don't understand is how fucking green the grass is over here. Yeah. I know. It is bliss. It's fucking perfect on this side of the fence. Yeah. You guys over there just worried about like how things work, how fucking the media is

getting into your brain, how advertising works. I'm sitting on the couch with a bag of chips. I love it, man. Having a good time. I'm like, yeah. Fucking nuclear war starts, you just walk out with a lawn chair. Yeah. You know what?

I could go for a Sprite right now. Like, I am fucking easy, dude. It's so awesome being like this just this fucking stupid ass brain ignorance is bliss man yeah

ignorance is fucking bliss I remember like someone being like Frankie Riley was like dude you don't want to understand why like these birds

know how to do this and that like I don't have an engineering brain I don't need to know how shit works that's how shit goes no dude

don't ask questions you don't ever like doesn't matter works. That's how shit goes? No, dude, you don't ask questions. It doesn't matter. I have a special needs brother. Greatest guy in the world. I love him to death. But I always think about how amazing his life is. Dude, everywhere he goes, there's just a van.

There's a van that comes. Imagine your life was just like a van. You wanted to go somewhere and a van comes and in the van are all your friends every time and you're going to the most lit place like what do we do we're going bowling like it's bowling it's movies it's applebee's and you think applebee's is rails you don't know it's like lit all the time dude he's got a friend who's got a string and he just loves his string and it's like string like a piece of string string he plays plays it it loves it he's like

this is my string just like the string everybody needs a string in their life you need a string and but but the problem is uh people's their their the string they want is too elaborate you know their string is a fucking five bedroom mansion and 10 cars on the beach or whatever what you need is a literal string. You need a literal string. We all need to be more like Feidelberg. We need to be just. Well, I have a special needs friend too.

He hasn't been diagnosed yet. It's KFC Radio, me and my retarded co-host. It is. It's just fucking. It is. I try to be more like Feidelberg. I really do. I really try to be more like him.

I heard you guys were talking about kids to start the show today. You're like, what's those things? I woke up, watched six episodes of Seinfeld, and then watched the movie The Informer. Before work? On a fucking Wednesday? Then I worked out for a little bit,

jumped in the shower, got some poison food and came here. Do you ever have – you are a beautiful, beautiful case study because you – I mean you've heard me say this a million times, right, about when you have kids. I like to be very honest about having kids. It sucks. Yeah. But it's – it gives – it's not fun. Right.

Like fun as an adult, you want to go and drink and and have sex with people and travel and do shit and when you have kids you no longer do that so don't tell me you're having fun right but you want you can tell me that you have you have this feeling inside you that you know it's very hard to put into words but it's like you feel um you feel like you're fulfilled you feel like a purpose or any of these dumb words? Do you ever think about that at all? No, right? I don't even think he was thinking about listening to you. I was counting my heartbeats in my head.

I swear to God, he's one step above your target. He's one step above mentally disabled. I could feel my heartbeat on as far as going, one, two, three. He just hears a word like Charlie Brown, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. I think if you were to two, three. He just hears the world like Charlie Brown. Yes. I think if you were to go in there, all you'd hear is just circus music. Yeah. How many squares are in the ceiling? I can't even count that out.

Oh, well. I need a sprite. Dude, you'd be a fun dad, though. Imagine you were his son and you were like, what are we doing today? Yeah, because they'd be friends when he's doing it. They'd be like, dude, fuck school, man. We're watching six episodes of Seinfeld and then The Enforcer. The Enformer. The Enformer.

Rosamund Pike, Clive Owen, come on. Kid, we're going to try Coke. You want to try Coke? These kids are going to be like, yeah, I do. Sometimes I think about it. This is called Cocaine Wednesday. He loves it. Cocaine Wednesday.

Sometimes I think if I was truly a single dad, like I'm a divorced dad now, but if I was just me by myself, I wonder how many times I would do things. Like I'd wake up, and if it was just a little bit extra hard in the morning, I'd be like, fuck it, we're not going to school today. We woke up a little late, you stubbed your toe, I burnt breakfast, we're calling it. And then all of a sudden

the kids have gone to school like 30 days the whole year. I wonder, I feel like I would be like that. If I didn't have somebody to check me or to yell at me for doing that shit, I think it would be a fucking free-for-all. Because I'm of the school of mind you're describing my mother yeah you're goddamn right yeah that's polly right there my mom didn't let me they made me go to school on mondays and i didn't go to school on monday for like 18 mondays it makes sense

cool mom yeah Yeah it makes sense I actually I think part of the reason Why I don't think I'll leave my wife Is because I'm scared to be like Just be first string I like being off the bench It is not Being divorced is cool because you do get off time

So you get to go back to being Like I said all those other things Just being an adult But when you're on you're solo out there. Yeah. It's you're all alone. I mean, I got, you know, my grandparents and shit like that are helping. But like I, you know, for the most part, it's two on one.

Yeah. They're two on one against me at all times. They've got a fucking, you know. You can't tag out to anyone. Yeah. No, that's it. But then you get to bring them home and it's like. So that's I kind of gear up.

I'm like, I got to get through like these two days, this night, whatever's it. But then you get to bring them home and it's like – So that's – I kind of gear up. I'm like I got to get through like these two days, this night, whatever it is, and then we get – which I think if couples who stayed together could do that more, it would work a lot better. Yeah. But when your wife is going through the bullshit and you put your feet up and say, it's your turn, honey, not mine. I'm watching TV. You know how that goes. Yeah.

She's not going to – that would never fly. No. So if you could agree that like when you're you're on you're off and everybody gets like some sanity back but it's i mean i remember when the babies would wake up at night it would be like well technically it's her turn but if if she's up all night and i'm just snoozing away i'm fucking dead in the morning so i just have to both of us have to be up at night now like this sucks but a lot of that shit just the way it goes you know yeah um it's tiring the one thing that is accurate about what other parents told me before i had a kid is like you're just gonna be tired but you also don't realize

what that means you know it's like oh i've been tired before no no no no it's a whole nother level yeah and they and then you read things where it's like you actually lose your mind when you're this tired you know like like the like i think it's like the worst thing that can happen to you yeah not like hunger or thirst or any other bodily things like extreme exhaustion is when you will like actually lose your mind it's like oh this is gonna happen to you for like three straight years three four straight years like yeah enjoy yeah great it's not yeah you're right it's good to be honest about that because it's the truth and i mean and you warn i warn people i try to be very honest about it and they don't you know i'm like oh your relationship's gonna suffer your fun's gonna suffer your work's gonna suffer uh your body will probably want to shake the baby don't want

we're definitely gonna want to i can't i have you ever had thoughts right when you said that i just wanted to sterilize you we can't let this kid out. You'd be like, what do I do with this thing? I mean, like, I fucking talked to him. Why is he not talking? I know how I treat, like, alarm clocks. A baby wouldn't fare well. Bite down! Whack.

Just knock it off the nightstand. I wake up, my phone's on the other side of the room every morning. Yeah, no, it's... You ever had, like, I had a moment where i was like oh i get why you know if i if i am as frustrated as i am right now where i'm kind of like oh my god but i'm like healthy in my mind and you know i'm not like i could just imagine if you're like single and poor and a little bit crazy and then that stress happens i can understand where someone just like loses it in the moment yeah i don't i don't understand why more dads don't like hold up gas stations and stuff just

get it out yeah what are you doing it's like i don't even want the money i just wanted to rob you to like get it out you know just walk in and fucking yell at everybody and then be like okay i'm good i almost you know when they write a note like give me all the money i need i'm gonna write a note like there are no bullets don't worry you'll be like, give me all the money? I'm going to write a note like, there are no bullets. Don't worry. You'll be fine. But give me all the fucking money! I can't hit anyone in my house! Can I punch someone, please? Here's $100.

Let me punch you. There should be like a boxing gym that's kind of like, you know, that's what we're doing here. You're not going to come here to train. We're not going to turn you into a real fighter. This is come hit something else besides your wife and kids. The inspiration for Fight Club? Right. Yeah, basically.

Yeah, it's kind of like Fight Club, just a little more actually reasonable. Yeah, just put a picture of your wife on the bag. You just leave feeling great. And they need it too, by the way. You know, your wife can go to a fucking... Absolutely. They can beat the shit out of your face face too because i they definitely hate you yeah so you know it's uh but yeah i mean this is this is the way to be right here it's the inspiration for all men

it really you know what really drives me nuts is that we all as a society have agreed to give up your third mostly your 30s 40s and 50, and maybe even a little bit of 60s, and then you're like, and then I'll travel the world and do all that shit. When I'm shitting in my Depends, and I got skin cancer, and me and my wife already hate each other, now I have the time and the freedom to go, it's like, why did we fucking give up all of our good years? Right, right.

You're like, yeah, you're just rolling into monaco all like a yeah like a vietnam veteran nobody wants to look at you nobody wants to fuck you nobody wants to hang out with you you can't do any of the cool shit anymore yeah but you know you've got and you've got some kids you're still paying for their cell phone they're 35 people i'm 34 people like react in shock when I'm like No I pay my own cell phone bill Which I don't Work does But they're like You're not selling your parents plan

I'm like No I'm not selling my parents plan I've been selling my parents plan Since I was fucking 18 Yeah I think that's more of like If there's not a reason To get off

Like I would never like Actively go in there And kick them off Because I just Like the bills come in And I pay the bills And that's it But

Yeah I don't know I feel like you just pay for kids. People are always like, you got to, you know, just until they're 18. It's like, yeah, but not now. It used to be that way. Yeah. It used to be that way. Especially daughters.

I feel like you got to like, you know, take care of a little more, worry about a little more. And it's like, no, no, this will be for life pretty much. Yeah. Yeah. Especially now. It used to be like, you know, once you turn 21, your parents were like, go fight in a war.

Yeah. Go pay for your own stuff. But now you're like 21. Yeah. Paying 21 is like, you know, once you turned 21, your parents were like, go fight in a war. Go pay for your own stuff. But now you're like 21. Paying for us now. Yeah, paying for 21 is like, I don't know. I'm still a kid. I don't know what I want to do. So yeah, I think my dad, I still have pictures of my dad in a suit when he was like 19.

Really? Yeah, he was already a war veteran, you know. They used to grow up quicker. Now it's like, remember you used to see like people people like they were like 12 year olds in suits when all those old pictures from the 30s and 40s and now you see like 50 year olds in air max yeah nikes the world is flipped totally it's flipped i saw an article um and i'm gonna be furious about this i haven't dug in totally to it because this this was basically my whole like mantra uh when i first started at barstool uh gen z is using the term quiet quitting which is just mail time

it's just like go to your job do the work but don't overly do it don't be the guy who like hustles and gets caught up in the rat race like just do what you get paid to do, and don't go above and beyond because they're using you, so you should use them. And they're calling it quiet quitting, and it's all about how to avoid burnout. And I'm just like, yeah, yeah. I've been talking about it for fucking years. These guys just figured out how to be lazy, basically.

They're just describing being lazy, Gen Z, and they think they've unlocked some magical. I like quiet quitting. Quiet know. I like quiet quitting. Quiet quitting. I think quiet quitting has got a nice little ring to it. I think it does, but I don't think it describes it. I thought it was going to be – that's too much of a term for what it actually is. Like if I just told you, like, I'm quiet quitting and it was just like, yeah, that means I just do the minimum at work.

I don't think quiet quitting describes that. Right. I feel like it would have more to do with actually quitting and leaving the job. I love the sentiment. I just think when I saw quiet quitting, I was like, oh, this is going to be good. And it's just like, don't work too hard. That's not really quiet quitting. That's what mailing it is.

It's the minor attracted person of quitting. That's a rebrand. Yeah, that's a rebrand right there. Minor attracted person. You're like, all right. That's a rebrand. Yeah, that's a rebrand right there. Minor attracted person. You're like, all right. That's marketing, man. That's marketing. I had a show for a while on AOL.

Remember AOL? Oh, my God. And we shared a building with Huffington Post. Was it like a... It was like a... Was it aired on electronic devices? Yeah, I think it just... AOL's show?

It just mailed it. It aired only on people who had dial-up modems. Yeah. We had to watch the show. You had to hear- When was this, roughly? 2015. I think we did this-

We did our daily- The show, The Rundown. It's our daily, like, rundown of topics. We did, I think, one episode with it, with AOL. We were, like, on their front page, and we were kind of like, this is- I think this is going to be good. Like, it's going to legitimize us.

I know it's old, but it's like Warner, AOL, you know. They had a lot of money. Yeah. And I think one episode aired and they were like, we can never do this again. But anyway, continue. Yeah. So they had a nap room. Huffington Post had a nap room.

It was like a legit nap room. That and free bodega coolers full of drinks. Like you could just go and pull like just, they had beverages that you pay for. So I would just take a backpack and just fucking load up and fill my fridge. But like you free drinks, nap room. It's like, can you imagine if our grandparents saw that? You're at work? Dude, the nap room.

They had a nap room. The nap room's got to be covered in cum. Yeah. People would sign up, and then you just see someone in there sleeping during the middle of the day. It was just like, all right, it's time for my nap. I'm like, dude, nap room was from kindergarten. Yeah. I was like, that was a kindergarten thing.

What kind of adult needs a fucking nap in the middle of a work day? Between nap room and the coolers, it's snack time, too. Yeah, snack time. It's snack time. It's basically adult kindergarten. We're also describing this off. I was going to say Barstool Sports. There are very often people sleeping in this office. We absolutely have a snack room.

We absolutely have a ping pong room. We have foosball, basketball. We are We're a step below. One time a guy he's great. He's here now. Wayne Jetski is actually one of the harder working kids here. But when he first started, he just went to one of the, and this is when we had a smaller office.

So there was only like maybe five or six rooms you could go in. And he just laid down on the ground and went to sleep. And when he was confronted, he was like, I'm tired. I was, they were like, what are you doing? He was like, I took a nap. They were like what are you doing he was like i took a nap they were like why and he's like because i was tired yeah like what do you fucking mean why do people sleep when they're tired that's what i did and uh it it was a funny moment here so even you know there are lines even at a joke of a place like this being unconscious during during paid

hours is kind of oh i i mean i i've lost count of the naps I've taken here. Well, it's also like, who cares if you're awake but just not doing a goddamn thing? Yeah. Right. It's like, I'm napping up here, brother. So most of the people are doing nothing. Right? Yeah. If people could, if you could somehow magically get the whole world

to do work, like, efficiently, there's like snap a finger, everybody's working as hard and as quickly as they can i think the work day would be like three or four hours max and the work week yeah every job i've had i got you think about a 40 a 40 hour work week you did 40 hours of shit this week no you fucking didn't know the only people doing that are in factories and they're in other countries in sweatshops yeah and they're not doing that are in factories and they're in other countries. Obviously, in sweatshops. And they're not doing 40.

They're doing 400. They build 1,000 of these in an hour. 40-hour work week. They're like, what? Who's this cool new boss? I remember when I was working as an accountant, we had an office in India. And we would send them work. It was awesome.

Our workday would end. Their workday would start. So I would send them work. It was awesome. Our workday would end, their workday would start. So I would send them the work, and then I'd come back in the morning, and it would be like the fucking, you know, Cinderella worked on it overnight, and it just magically is done, you know? But, so we got to know some of them a little bit,

and I remember them being like, yeah, I'm off like this next, like, week or 10 days or whatever, I'm going home. And like, eight of the days were spent commuting because it was like i gotta get from here to here in india and it takes like a 40 hour commute to like i gotta take a train here and then sleep in that station and take a bus here and then sleep there and like part of their like work day was just like massive commutes every fucking day and i was like oh and so yeah they were looking at us like Yeah What do you guys got to do

Yeah Yeah There's a billion of them right There's a billion over there So yeah It's hard You gotta wait for your train man You gotta get a spot dude

You can't squeeze on You know You gotta get off the side Those videos They used to be like More popular back in the early Internet days But like

They're my favorite The Indian trains Which is like People jammed up on top And just riding Japan and Asia They do that. In India they just sit on top

of the train. Those are wild. Those are insane. Indian trains are like death defying. They'll have full markets in between. They lift the fucking overhangs up and they're pulling all the vegetables and stuff as the train comes.

The train just runs through a market. That's nuts. It really is, man. It's fucking bananas. There's no room. There's nowhere else. It's got to go through something. There's no room to put everything, so it's like trains got to go through other stuff.

You think about how many people there are in the size of that country. India is – I mean it's not small, but it's not a billion people big either. It's fucking bananas to cram all that in there yeah there's a billion of them when you consider oh what was the question you asked the other day to be honest maybe

you could chime in on this do you think all the land is bought in America is all the land owned is every like inch of land well the government

owns some but yeah but counting government or private like is there undiscovered or unclaimed land in America left I don't

probably not probably not because those blood sucking motherfuckers would find it. Yeah, yeah. Because like you got to think that they'd be like in certain places where I would maybe imagine there's like nothing else is also where there might be like oil or natural gas or whatever. And you just can't let that go.

Fucking nuclear silos. Right, right, right. That's where they got to do all their weird shit. Let's put up a Stranger Things factory out here and create little kids. The church owns a lot. Catholic Church owns a lot. Second biggest landowner in D.C. I know that.

Is it really? I think in New York, and they're like the first. Are they really? I think so. I think it's like something bananas like that. They run a great business. Or maybe that's good. They really do.

Hope Stores is a good, just a hope store. And then like no taxes, and then they can reinvest. You're like, it's a beautiful, beautiful business. No overhead. What do you get, crackers? Maybe a little cheap wine? That's it, dude. Couple toys for the kids, that's it, to convince them.

They don't make anything, right? No, they don't make anything. I don't think a priest is going to take a vow of poverty, I don't think. No. But they're still like they make broken kids yeah you know what honestly to go back to my earlier question about if if marketing and all that shit influences people i mean look no further than the church bro oh they are yeah the church has six billion dollars of real estate in new york city Wow. Just in the city? Yeah. Wow.

Wow. The churches. Wow. That is. That's crazy. That is so much real estate in the city. Wow. I mean, I said NYC, so I'm assuming this would be just the city.

I mean, even if it's New York State, that's still a lot. There's not much other spots that have the real estate. Right. Right. I mean, that is just. The city matters most anyway, New York State. I mean, that is just- The city matters most, anyway, New York State. I mean, who cares who's got it? Whoever owns stuff in Schenectady, good luck to you.

Yeah. It's so true. Who gives a fuck? Oh, you got a house in Troy? Troy? Great. I'd rather be homeless. I once went to Tuxedo, New York.

Oh. I didn't even know there was. Remember that? The Spartan race was in Tuxedo. Is that where I did it? Yeah. Oh, dude, I learned about Tuxedo New York recently. It is where racket.

There's this sport called racket. It is a very well-to-do sport to the point where there are like six courts in North America. Wow. Is it just like a tennis-type game? Yeah, it's like some kind of mixed mash of squash and tennis and all those fucking racket sports. I believe it's Chicago, New York,

LA, Tuxedo. I forget what it is. But Tuxedo is one of the few cities that has it. I thought Tuxedo was like a dump. Tuxedo is where the Tuxedo got named. That makes sense. There's so many people wearing Tuxedos in Tuxedo, New York. That's where the Tuxedo was like a dump. Tuxedo is where the tuxedo got named. That makes sense.

There's so many people wearing tuxedos in Tuxedo, New York. That's where the tuxedo came from. Oh, so it's a rich, rich place. What was it called before they... I don't know. I know it's a British suit. Like, tuxedos are a British thing. But they got the American name tuxedo

because they were so often worn in Tuxedo, New York. Because that's where people went to play racket. Well, before that, it probably had some sort of Indian name. right that stopped have you watched prey no it's the sequel to predator yeah it's uh it's like got native it's a set in Native American times it's fucking dope you should go check it out I'm watching the offer right now about the godfather making it's incredible yeah it's so good I heard it good. I'm glued to it. It's crazy to know what you got to do to get something made. Especially then.

Dude, they didn't want Pacino. Can you imagine if Pacino wasn't Michael? It was all Coppola. He was an unknown off-Broadway actor, and they were giving him the lead. Pacino was a Coppola. No, Coppola was giving Pacino. Pacino was just an Off Broadway actor Right

And the studio was like No I mean that does make sense It makes sense But like Coppola That just You gotta give credit to Coppola

Like he saw it And he's like You know I mean it's funny too It's like Probably yeah You know like he's Probably a visionary

And does deserve all the credit But also like That could go the other way Real quick You know what I mean It's just like, oh, no. You fucking blew it. Of course you shouldn't have given it to an off-Broadway nobody.

You know what I mean? Yeah. So there's probably a little bit of luck involved. I mean, obviously he's very skilled, but you know what I mean. He saw something in him, though. He saw it and like, yeah. I mean, that's the thing is every successful thing. I remember I watched the 60 Minutes.

They had Dave Chappelle and Neil Brennan on there talking about Chappelle's show. And they were talking about every single sketch that Comedy Central wanted to get rid of is every single sketch

that made the show. It's classic. To the T. It was all of them and they fought and fought and fought. It's like when we do interviews with people

and the publicist will be like, you can't talk about this, this, and this. And it's like, well, that is what I want to talk about. That's the good stuff. That's the only shit that people want to hear about. I can't believe that people haven't still caught on to that. You know, it's like eventually I'm hoping that someone from like our generation gets in control of these decisions.

And it's just like, no, we can take a risk or whatever. But I do think it is different when it's like you could be the most like no we don't censor we don't do this we don't do that and then all of a sudden

you get the job where you're in control of like the hundred million dollar bag and you're like eh it's not worth it let's just censor that joke so I don't have to deal

with any of this bullshit I can totally understand how that happens totally and I get like when athletes because a lot of times it's athletes right

they can't say anything Yeah Like I've had sports shows And it's like And the publicist is like Just Can we just do a silent interview And you're like alright

And you just mime to them Like you can't talk about that You can't talk about And I get it though Because they have like An Adidas sponsorship It's employees It's like what is the

What is the risk reward The risk is I lose My fucking Adidas sponsorship Right The reward is like I go semi viral On KFC radio Right You know I mean I guess you could? The risk is I lose my fucking Adidas sponsorship. The reward is like I go semi-viral on KFC radio. I mean, I guess you could argue the reward is if you really have a strong brand and a strong personality, you can become like an iconic, you know, forever remembered athlete.

But probably not. It's pretty rare. Pretty fucking rare. Better to just be like, you know, quiet, polite, and make your fucking money. We went years. Like, I had no idea that Michael Jordan was like a flaming asshole. They hid that so well. Because there's also, you know, no way.

As long as the reporters don't have an ax to grind with you back then, and Michael probably like just made sure he was polite enough to them so that they don't say like, oh, yeah, well, we're writing about your fucking, you know, all the hoes you're banging. Yeah. Then how would anybody ever find out? There's no fucking there's no filming there's no sneaky shit you know it's like yeah but he was i mean he was yeah wow the jordan rules did come out but like he denied it the team denied the other thing you just go like no no it didn't happen true and then everyone goes okay what were the jordan rules

jordan rules is a book talking about him being kind of a dick. Oh, okay. And how he rules and his way. It was also, it's a play on words because the Jordan rules were like the rules of the game. Oh, the pistons, yeah. But that reminds me of Antonio Brown today. What did he say? He just talked about how Brady has a double standard when it comes to Tom Brady.

He's like, no kidding. How the team treats him. He's like, yeah, no fucking shit there. Of course, dude. Double standards all over the goddamn world. You want to go, Antonio Brown,

what would you do if you owned the team and you had Tom Brady? Okay, he killed the hooker. You're going to call the cops or are you going to hide the body? I mean, you got all this money

invested in this team and it's Tom Brady. The hooker is getting burned in a fucking burn pit and people are getting paid off and it goes away, dog. Could you imagine could you imagine if a headline broke

that Tom Brady killed the hooker how great would that be it would be hilarious it would never happen it's the same thing with Jeter so good

dude Jeter Jeter could have killed Jeter oh I think he definitely could have killed he could have did anything he could have groped we would never know

because you think the NYPD is going to rat on fucking Derek G? You could call them the NYPD, but they're 30,000 Yankee fans from Staten Island. They walk in. They're like, what happened here? And then they just throw cocaine on you. You want to go to jail?

Nothing happened. Nobody saw nothing. Are you crazy? The fucking playoffs are coming. Oh, he grabbed your titty. Go fucking walk it off. The playoffs are coming. He's like, fuck. Oh, he grabbed your titty. Go fucking walk it off. The playoffs are coming. Babe, it's September 29th, all right?

We got the fucking Orioles in a week for the ALDS. Are you nuts? Are you crazy? We're on a pennant race with the Sox. Are you watching that documentary at all? I feel like this shit is totally flopping. I haven't watched it yet. See, I mean, if someone like you has not watched the dare cheater doc then nobody is yeah i think in

part though it's not because i don't want to it's just because like there's just so much there's so much going on like so much content a lot of people compared it to the jordan doc and and that was perfect timing with the pandemic too but also like because there was he was so it was a long time ago first of all, at least longer than Jeter, and there was so much hidden about him. And I thought Jeter had enough mystique around him because we didn't know enough about him either. Apparently not, though. We are a company of Boston and New York people who are sports and baseball fans.

I'm like, nobody gives a fuck. I've seen a couple clips floating around. I think it's just the bubbles kind of burst on the self-produced documentary. Even MJ we dealt with and were like, okay, we understand it's all bullshit. Not all bullshit. You can't be involved. It's not the real, real story. And then the Brady one happened, and that was more focused on the games themselves,

so it wasn't as necessary to have the behind-the-scenes type deal. But then, like, Jeter's doing one, Melo just announced his, and it's like, I don't know, man. How many of you guys are going to keep doing self-produced documentaries? Nobody knows, it's going to be fluff. What needs to happen is, like, I made a documentary without you. It would be wise for you to be a part of it and have some responses to it or something like that. You know what I mean?

That way they can be in it because I do want to hear from them, but I'm not going to change. It would never happen. Do you think some of it is baseball? Because baseball just... Boring. It's just losing popularity every single year. You know what is weird?

It's like their numbers are up, but just with the wrong demo, I think. Right i think i think they're making more money than ever i think there was there's been a couple stats of like this week sunday night baseball was the highest rated sunday night baseball since like the steroid era or some shit like that so there are statistics that are up but i would just bet you that you know that 1.1 million people watching whatever, like zero of them are 12 to 16 or whatever. So how old are the young people? Yeah. I don't think it's that baseball is dead.

I think that it's just slowly dying out because who cares if you have a bajillion 65-year-olds watching? You have to get popular with the young people to keep it. But maybe not. I mean it would stand to reason that if those numbers are up, more kids would be involved. But I think that's the issue is that you're not getting the demo you want. Right. They got to do – I think they got to do – this is the only sport that has not, like, you know, adapted. The first thing they need to do is just let people on the internet talk about their – you can't post a video.

You get strikes against you. You get taken down. The very first thing you could do is let the millions of people on social media be free marketing. Advertise people. Yeah. That would be the very first step. The rest is tough because the game itself is pretty slow and whatever. Blind guy on the sideline with a gun just randomly firing.

It could spice things up a little bit. It could spice things up a little bit. I could spice it up. I got an actual suggestion, like an earnest suggestion. So many games. There's so many games. Too many games, I think. But what if you made the series more important by doing this? Like, if you sweep the series, you get an extra point.

If you get swept, yeah, you lose a point. So it's like every series is more important, and then a team that's far behind has a chance to climb up quick because they can sweep or they can wing. Yeah, I mean, it's funny because I'm watching that with the Mets this year. The Mets are... The Mets have a 36 series this year.

They're 27-6-3. They really don't lose a lot of series, but it's often just 2 out of 3, 2 out of 3, 2 out of 3. And that extra sweep, like if you were to sweep some of those games, you'd be like 12 games up in the division. So there really is like you can play, you can be a good team and just win 2 out of 3, but you're not a great team. You know what I mean?

So reward those people who can like close the door and give you. Yeah, I mean mean i'm down for anything that you know you can only throw to first a certain amount of times that becomes a thing i mean this the runner on second i loved like i thought i was against that and then once i realized that that's a pretty wacky rule that i thought worked out pretty well so if that i can get down with i could probably get down with all sorts of shit just get some more athletes i mean it's like you know fucking 400 pounds cecil-pound Cecil Fielder junior rolls up, and you're like...

Be careful, Mike. Vogelback on the Mets, big fat boy, electric. I know, but I'm just... You know what? I think they're wrong. They need more fat athletes. Just like I see in these... Pretty soon they're just going to come up on scooters and just pop out and bang, and then have somebody run for them. How about they stay on the scooter?

You run the bases on the scooter. I like it. There we go. That would be fun. Or every player can do the drug of their choice for the game. I was going to say, yeah, that would be great. The real way to do it, remember the last time baseball was amazing, was the home run race.

Absolutely. Let them do it, dude. Everybody hit 90 home runs a year. A perfect game. What's his name through a perfect game? Doc Ellis. Doc Ellis threw a perfect game when he was on LSD and the weather happened

at the very least we gotta get back the amphetamine yeah but the LSD used to be a pot yeah they said there used to be

a pot of greenies and you just walk by eat like gum like pistachios yeah it'd be great if a dude's on LSD and he just thinks

the batter's over there and he's like it'd be great he'd try to have to show him where the real guy is and then that guy's on steroids on coke whatever whatever man yeah do you believe tatis about his uh what did he say i know i know like every doctor alive was like that didn't happen he said he got ringworm yeah yeah uh and that he put the cream on his neck and that there is there is ringworm

cream that does have Clobastrol Or whatever the fuck it's called In it So it's like It's not You know Bro here's the deal Even if I got ringworm

I just eat my 80 inch suspension And not tell everyone I got fucking ringworm Like a barn animal Dude who the fuck gets ringworm The only person I've ever heard Who gets ringworm Is Rickety Cricket

Holy sonny That's it Never heard of someone fuck gets ringworms? The only person I've ever heard who gets ringworms is Rickety Cricket. Holy sonny, that's it. I've never heard of someone who gets ringworms. Wrestlers get it a lot from the mat. I don't know why the fuck he would have got it. He's full of shit. He just happened to have a bad substance of ringworm cream. Right. It's like, come on, dude.

That was just a quick Google. He's like, guilty? All right, what's in? That's what I'm saying. What has clubosol or whatever it's called? They reverse engineered it. Yeah. Like, what is a slightly plausible story?

My mom gave me some cream for my ringworm. I mean, he is a 21-year-old moron, so maybe it is possible. That guy's an idiot. That guy, they gave $300 million to a clown. I mean, how would the... The fact that this team, like, so quickly all threw him under the bus, I saw, like... Yeah. I saw it was, like, Clevenger, and then there was someone else.

The GM flat out was like, this is a pattern of behavior that we are very concerned about. Yeah. Wish I could go back in time and not give him a $300 million guaranteed deal. I mean, he broke his wrist, I think, riding a motorcycle or doing something stupid, and then lied about how he broke it or whatever. He's been, you know, it or whatever. He's been awesome. He's fucking awesome. Those guys

are fun though. You also need more of that. You give them all that money and you cross your fingers and you're like, there's more girls? God damn it. More than 18? There's more than 18? 18, I was comfortable with.

19 is the deal breaker. When you sign and you know it's 18, you're going confidently, that's all of them. Yes, it's 18. We have got them all out of the closet. And then more, you're going, fuck. And you know that they went to him, too, and they were like, Deshaun, just be real with me. Is there anybody else? I'm just like, no, no, no.

Like, the next day, we're at 35. We doubled overnight, Deshaun. Be real with me. Is there anyone else i'm just like no no no like the next day we're at 35 we doubled overnight deshaun be real with me is there anyone else has anyone else come forward no no no yeah i mean the browser they're not happy about that no no that's a tough one yeah neither are the girls neither are the trainers we're gonna see just on like how how can you how can you work on deshaun watson if you're a female trainer in that organization? I would imagine, hopefully, God willing, he's on his normal behavior, best behavior. You've got to fucking massage him down like he's Hannibal Lecter. He's just fucking locked in.

Deshaun Watson gets wheeled into the training room every day. He's got a fucking butt plug in there. You cannot rub his asshole because it's filled up with something already. Deshaun, there's no way they can rub your asshole. Stop asking for it. We've got you plugged up, dude. Fucking creep. He fucking keep going.

He gets over that. He plays and they find out he has his own like Epstein type island. You're like, fuck, I got an island. That's the other thing, you know. Jesus Christ. There's probably more going on there, man. He's like, I love fucking Masai.

What do you want me to do? I fucking love Masai. So we got this special out. Special's out. Please go check it out. It's on YouTube. It's free. It's a beautiful thing, man.

That's been the revolution. That's the way. Yeah. So it's called Mom Love. Just put it in the way. Yeah. So it's called Mom Love. Just put it in a search. Yeah. I mean, you always tell that infamous story about you put on your mom's underwear or something like that. Yeah, yeah.

So Mom Love, that's what makes me think of it. I don't know if that's part of this or inspired by this, but that was the first time we met. You dropped that, I think, like, after we kind of talked and everything. It was stockings. Maybe during Answer the Internet, you said said it and it was like, what? I thought I was joking and then I realized it very much was not. Make sure you play Wild Horses when he says that. What is that song?

Yeah, Rolling Stones? Yeah, no, not Wild Horses, but the other one from. What's it about? Putting all your mothers on the bench? No, from Silence of the Lambs. Oh, I know what you mean. Something horses. Yeah, I know.

I mean, that's a good song that like... That scene just kind of took that song. I wonder if you're happy about that or not. When you make a song, it's like, okay, I'm going to live on forever. Yeah. But it's always going to be associated with... But anytime it comes on, everyone's just going to tuck their dick between their legs. You can't hear that song without going like, I'd fuck me.

You just can't. You just can't do it. Fuck, what is that goddamn song? Yeah, what is it? What's that song? Not Wild Horses, but Something Horses. Oh, goodbye horses. Is that what it is?

Yeah. Crying over you. See, even when I'm doing it, I want to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Mangina Dance. Goodbye, horses. Yeah, Goodbye Horses by Q Lazarus. Yeah, that guy.

Q Lazarus has to like it. If it's a major band, maybe you don't want to be associated with Q. Let's see if he has a quote or something. Q Lazarus responds to silence. I bet you he was probably like, well, you know, it's not the best of things. It's not the worst either. Yeah, I mean, the royalty. I mean, money's money.

Put that song on the map. Kind of how we did Saudi Arabia earlier. Money's money, dude. How about this? Mysterious goodbye horses singer breaks her silence 30 years later. So maybe she finally talked about it but not until late as the story goes Q Lazarus was a cab driver in New York

in the 80s when she picked up Jonathan Dem Demi she played her demo tape for him in a taxi and he was blown away he put goodbye horses in the 1988 film married to the mob and silence of the lambs including blah blah blah I guess her music's been

in a lot of stuff but Q Lazarus all but disappeared from the public eye in the 90s so I guess she just kind of peaced out but I wonder if it was probably because

her favorite fucking song was ruined by a guy with a man gina I can't imagine a serial killer who wears people's skin who was fucking dancing to it

with his dick tick tick tick tick his legs with a woman in a hole. He's going to cut her skin off. He just kept splashing her. Why are you splashing her?

How about this, though? This girl, so she disappeared or whatever. She finally popped up on the internet. People think at least. This was 2018, so not too long ago. She said, I want to let people know I'm still alive. I have no interest in singing anymore. I'm a bus driver in Staten Island, and I have been for years.

I see hundreds of passengers every day, so I'm hardly hiding. So she's just kind of like. She's a bus driver in Staten Island. But, like, isn't there something, you know, to wrap this all up, kind of go full circle? She's just like, I just drive from point A to point B. I don't care. People are like, there's a knife fight behind me in my bus. I don't care. I made music. I don't anymore. I don't care. People are like, has there a knife fight behind me in my bus? I don't care.

I made music. I don't anymore. I don't care. Yeah. Just a whole lot of easy living. It is. It's that kind of- I wouldn't recommend being a bus driver in Staten Island.

I would maybe do like a relax on a beach somewhere or something, but it's that simplicity. Yeah. I was like, I don't know. I was like, I don't know. I was like, I don't know. I was like, I don't know. I was like, I don't know. I was like, I don't know.

She probably doesn't have relax on the beach money. It's like, I always remember the one thing Kyrie- Technically, you could do that for free. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anybody, you can be poor as shit, but sit on the beach money. It's like I always remember the one thing Kyrie – Technically, you could do that for free. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anybody – you can be poor as shit but sit on a beach. I remember when I was a kid, if I heard a song anywhere or I saw someone on TV, I just automatically assumed they were gazillionaires. Oh, yeah.

I just like, yeah. You're just like, oh, there must be loaded. I honestly think there was a point where if you got on TV in any way, I do think you at least made some cash. Yeah. Now it's like, oh, there must be loaded. I honestly think there was a point where if you got on TV in any way, I do think you at least made some cash. And now it's like, you know. Oh, actually, you know, you've been on Rogan a bunch, right? Yeah. Has there been – is, like, the Rogan bump still what it used to be?

There was a point where you got on Rogan. It was, like, the old school version of, like, you got on The Tonight Show and your career is made or your Patreon explodes or whatever. I think it's been – I feel like maybe whether it was the Spotify thing or just it's almost like you get so big it's like we can't make every single guest be the next thing.

I think it was the switch to Spotify off of YouTube. Yeah, and I think maybe just how long can you be at the top. It helps still. It's still a nice bump but I don't think it's the same as like you're on and. Yeah. Yeah.

Cause I think there was a point where it was like, if Rogan has you on, that means everything. And all of my followers will go follow you. But it can that, can you really do that every single episode? Like eventually viewers are going to be like, well,

it doesn't mean, you know? Yeah. But man, you could, if you got in at the right time. He made like professor celebrities. There's a couple guys who left their dumb jobs at community colleges and started podcasts.

That's what's funny. Otherwise, they'd still be teaching at some unknown school. And he had them on. And now they're just like out there fucking grifting. The comics who get a special, it's kind of like, all right, that makes sense, though. You did your thing. You got good enough at comedy. You had a big name podcast.

But yeah, to be like, I used to just teach. And now, for whatever reason, Joe wants me on there. And I yelled about the vaccine. Now I either have a sponsorship with Manscaped. I also have haters who are trying to, like, burn down my lab. Talk about a whirlwind. Fighting all these groupies off. You're like, dude, you're a fucking, you're a professor from Greenberg University.

It's like, what was the movie with Leo? I was fucking O's. That's what, in Don't Look Up, LeonardoCaprio was like You know just a regular Astronomer And next thing you know He's banging bitches Because he's like The hottest professor In the world

The last two guys Who got in right before Like when he Made the switch From you know Everywhere to Spotify Was Dylan Schultz They were like

They caught that last Kind of wave Of like You know Massive massive numbers His numbers are still massive. With YouTube, it's just it's always up there. And the thing is –

And you're one click away. And it puts you in that algorithm. So it's like when you put something up, his clip. If you listen on Spotify, you might like him. You might like the guest. But it's a very like – all right, let me close Spotify. Open up Instagram. Type in his name.

Follow it along. Whereas if you're on YouTube and it just feeds it to you the link's in the description everything's right there so it is a little bit of timing but nonetheless you know

to get in with him it's still great were you nervous that first you've done three times three yeah the first time first time

I was a little nervous the second and third like I'm friends with him now so it's like now it's just like he's a comic. And he's also just like the greatest dude and the most normal guy. And he wants to help. If he likes a comic, he wants to help. He's just a nice, he's a normal dude.

It really is. You kind of just forget that he's in the news. I've seen a couple posts from him where he's like, I'm very aware that my money and fame and success is not proportional to who I am. I'm a comic and a podcaster and I'm good at it, but I recognize that I shouldn't be making the money I'm making. And I think that's a very – he's the only person in the world who has that distinction. Everyone else is like, if I make it, I'm worth it, and I'm the superstar and all that.

He's totally down to earth. Both feet on the ground normal dude I think a lot of it too is his personality he's a very curious guy he's a very humble guy and he also has all these hobbies where he like achieves things

so he's like you know it's like everything's earned with him it was like nothing was like he's just earned he like black belt in jujitsu and then he goes hunts elks

he does all this shit right you know I don't know how he does it he even watches six episodes of Seinfeld yeah there's no nap room in his studio I mean I don't know how he does all this shit right you know I don't know how he does it six episodes of yeah there's no nap room in his studio I mean I don't know how he does it dude he has three full-time jobs right and like a family family and he's also with his family a lot and then he like trains and does but I guess if you think about it like uh UFC is like he goes to whatever event that is

that's usually what once a month maybe he has a pay-per-view, like a big one that he's on. Yeah, probably once a month. He does a podcast three times a week, which takes up a few hours. I think they do two main events and then two just regular ESPN pluses, so maybe twice a month, but sometimes one. You're right. So UFC, the podcast, is there like a third?

And then stand-up. Oh, yeah. Stand-up full-time. But he's not doing like seven nights a week like some of these guys, right? No, not anymore. So when you think about it, that kind of goes back to what we were saying about the 40-hour work week. There's a lot of time to do a lot of shit. But he does three episodes a week, three Joe Rogan experiences, three hours each, three a week.

And then the UFC, he's got to do a lot of prep for that shit. He's got to know everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, he's got to do a lot of prep for that shit. He's got to know everything. He's got to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, I don't mean to diminish it. It's just, it is funny. Like, if you're not dicking around, then you are a guy like Joe who's like hyper-focused. It's like, all right, you can do that. I'm going to talk for three hours.

I'm going to do some prep. I'll see my kids when they get home from school. They go to bed. I'm going to do a set at the store or whatever, the cellar. And it's like, all's like you can do it and it helps to have a hundred million dollars still to his grandfather

his grandfather's like what the fuck are you doing it's not a job you didn't even build a factory we built Los Angeles not that fucking baby

alright brother so the special's Mom Love out on YouTube you can just search it on search bar. It's all for free, which is the way to go, dude. It is for sure the model right now.

So appreciate you coming in, man. Dude, thank you for having me. And tickets or anything? You on tour or doing that? Yeah, I'll be in a bunch of places. I'll go to yannispappascomedy.com for tickets. I'll be in Jersey coming up. I'll be in Michigan.

I'll be in Austin. be in Jersey coming up. I'll be in Michigan. I'll be in Austin and more dates coming up and then my podcast Long Days. You can check that out too. Beautiful. Thank you very much. Thank you guys.

What a fun fucking time. សូវាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប� Thank you. Bye.