KFC Radio - Kelly Keegs Explains Her Hate for The Mean Girls Ft. Drew Lynch

Episode Date: March 21, 2023

- Being on the Pirate Water float at the Boston Southie St. Pattys Parade + Brianna and Grace are Rockstars - KFC got suspended on Twitter tweeting about the World Baseball Classic and fighting with Marcus Stroman - Pavs' gross toothbrush story - Deciding on Jackie's punishment - Kelly Keegs finally breaks after the Mean Girls' "not washing hands" clip and explains her hate for the Mean Girls - Video Voicemails - Out of Order Response - Drew Lynch Interview ++++++++++++++++++++++ Timecodes: 00:00:00 Start 00:01:50 Being on the Pirate Water float at the Boston St. Pattys Parade 00:23:41 KFC got suspended on Twitter 00:46:42 Pavs' gross toothbrush story 00:52:12 Deciding on Jackie's punishment 01:01:00 Kelly Keegs explains her hate for Mean Girls 01:32:26 Video Voicemails 01:43:08 Out of Order Response 01:56:30 Drew Lynch Interview ++++++++++++++++++++++ Pirate Water: Go to drinkpiratewater.com to find pirate water in a location near you Fitbod: Get 25% off your subscription or try the app FREE at https://barstool.link/FitbodKFC Sportsbook: Download the Barstool Sportsbook and create an account today with code TOURNEY to unlock your $100 in bonus cash. MUST BE 21+. Gambling Problem? CALL 1-800-GAMBLERYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I held my tongue, held my tongue, held my tongue for months and months on this stupid shit, and now it just all came out today. And I'm pissed, and it's ridiculous, and I feel like I don't know these bitches anymore, and we're stuck with them. When everybody moves to Chicago, we're stuck with them. We have to work with them.

We have to get along with them. If they want to be on the wrong island of stupidity it's another edition of kfc radio on the Barstool Sports Network. We've got a monster pod for you today. We've got a guest on the back half, Drew Lynch. We've got some major Barstool drama. Very juicy and salacious. We've got that.

Also, go get your tickets for Wilbur, Boston, Stanford, Connecticut. What, May 21st? May 14th. May 14th. May 14th. Same thing. And then end of April, we are in Texas. We're in Dallas, Austin, and the other one? Houston.

Houston, Land of Apes. And so you can get all your tickets now. And, yeah, so we got a lot to talk about today. Very different weekends for you and I. Yeah. All interesting alike. But you were, you know what? I feel like I'm very on the record as anti-parade.

I think parades are the lowest form of human entertainment, along with fireworks. I think that these are things that were done back in the day when there was no entertainment, when you couldn't just hop on your phone or your television, and the only thing you could do was watch people walk by with balloons and costumes and shit. And the fact that people still do it to this day is crazy. I walked in a local St. Patrickrick's day parade with my kids and immediately shea was dancing in it they would walk and then dance and dance me and keegan were just walking and within one block he goes we're just walking and i said yeah man that's what this is and he

goes i'm bored i was like me too homie so uh all that being said i think being in the saint boston saint patrick's day parade like in it in with a duck boat is pretty cool it was it was very cool i it was um a little bit of something you maybe take like like back in the day you would be like oh my god now it's like yeah yeah sure there is there's there's a lot of factors on here first of all it was a very crowded duck boat like i really enjoyed paths and i jumped out about halfway through and and uh and we walked the rest of the way were people like it's like one of those trains in india people like hanging off the sides yeah it was it was crazy it was and it was it was that was awesome that was like that got more that got me more of a feel of the parade because you're in the crowd right rather than like an emperor in his ivory tower. Like, I got to put down with the people. I'm a common man,

Barstool Sports. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that was a lot of fun. That was cool. We had like a band behind us. I would recommend if you're going to be in a parade,

don't be on a float, duck boat, whatever it may be, directly in front of the police because it was sirens non-stop. Just like, and not like the ones that eventually you could drown out with. It was like. And I was like, God fucking damn it.

Shut the fuck up. And also, like always, I blew my load a little fast. Like, we started the parade route. I'm screaming. I'm fucking banging. By like block three, I had no voice. And it felt like I had daggers in my temple. lost like we we started the parade route i'm screaming i'm fucking banged by like by like block three i had no voice and it felt like i had daggers in my temple like i was in dude i hadn't felt like that since i went to the pc marquette game last year probably about probably close to

exactly a year ago let's go like just scream and it was like that was that game with a triple overtime and i had the fucking water leak from the ceiling of the dunk where I had to have a break. It was like fucking midnight by the time I got out of there. I was in real pain from yelling so much. I can't even talk loudly at a bar.

I don't know if I need to even talk loudly I think that played a factor is that I was at bars throughout the whole weekend talking and like I was already losing a voice. My head was already

hurting from yelling. I think I talk as loud as I wish other people would talk to me. Bro. Thank you. Because I don't think I need to talk as loud as I wish other people would talk to me. Bro. Thank you. Because I don't think I need to be as loud as I am. It's common decency. Yeah. There's a lot of the fucking

extracurricular sounds. Yeah. I'll have people just like talking normally. Where do you think you are right now? You think we're on a beach? You cannot go to a bar and speak normal. Right. Even if it's not crowded, just at a bar. Clinking and clacking. there's music on, there's a TV on,

other people are talking, you got to speak a little bit louder. I can hear you. I've gotten to the point where I don't really try anymore. I just go, I can't hear you, and I walk away.

What I've been doing is, say me, you, say there's four people, and I'm doing the lean in, I'm bending down, I say, what'd you say? I'm sorry, I can't hear you one more time.

What I'll then do is kind of fake it, laugh when I think I'm supposed to laugh, answer when I'm supposed to answer. The second that you jump in and you are now the target of the conversation, my eye contact is gone. I'm looking around, I'm pointing. I'm basically one step away from just walking out of the conversation. But the minute that – it's like a baton. And then you'll pass it back to me.

I'll take on the load at some point. Basically everyone in a bar, in a loud bar, is just telling a story to themselves. Yes. And people are going – And you're reacting probably incorrectly. But God, I mean I used to be in bars hitting on girls talking guys from across the way you can hear you can talk now i'm like i just don't i literally don't know what you're saying but then i'm trying to make sure you can hear it so i'm like we went to that thing at

bounce was just like a happy hour yeah and i walked out with like no voice yeah it was nuts it was a lot just just talking like so how are you doing today? At the end of it, I'm like, I don't know. What's your advertising budget this year? I will say about the parade. It was, first of all, we had a flight last night, so we weren't really drinking. It was pretty much a low-key parade for us. And I actually was surprised they let me on the plane because I was so drenched in pirate water that I must have reeked like booze. I must have stunk like booze.

I smelled like a little Bahama Mamba. Or maybe even a sex on the beach. Perhaps a margarita. Maybe a Miami Vice. Miami Vice. We are in the presence of rock stars. We are all witness. Some LeBron James billboard type shit. We are all witnesses. Dude.

Some LeBron James billboard type shit. We are all witnesses. Being on that float with Brianna Strickland-Frank and Grace O'Malley. Brianna always gets a ton of love. Grace O'Malley was getting just as many yells. Brianna had people openly weeping for her. Like crying. When I heard that people were crying.

I've seen when she did her tour last year, I saw the people chasing after her. Yeah. And I thought that was crazy. Crying. From a distance. Not even like if you get to meet your hero and you take a picture and you get a hug, maybe that kind of shit, you get overwhelming. From a distance to just see her and cry.

Nah, dude. It wasn't from a distance. These chicks, the bike racks did not stand. It was January 6th for fucking 20-year-olds in Boston just fucking punching cops in the face. Get the fuck out of the way. Chicken fries up there. It felt like being on a fucking

on a float like a duck boat parade with Brady and I was the long snapper. I could hear from the crowd, like, who gives a fuck? That guy even have pen money? Where's K-Marco?

It was, they were like, fuck that guy. It was crazy. It was amazing to see. It was unbelievable Awesome obviously It was But it was like It's like alright I'm just gonna sit down

And go fuck myself There's no reason to be here What a dream though It's like yeah You go do all that shit That's why I was like Pass

Let's get off the boat Let's go Walk ahead I think Dana said it too I had occasionally A guy be like Final mark What's up

And then Brianna's got fucking Chicks on their hands and knees praying Allah. Four times a day, women running alongside. Four times. Sleep when you're dead. Sleep when you're dead. It was, and, like, obviously, I knew Brianna's a fucking megastar.

I didn't realize it was this extent. It was like that. It was, it was wow. And she just still does it. Yeah. Like, she still goes to bars. She still goes to parades. She's probably in the club.

Like, maybe she's got a table now in a VIP section, but it's not like it's, you know, sneak Brianna in and out the back. It's not like, you know, she has to throw off the paparazzi. She just goes. She's a fucking gangster like that. Dude, she was in a fucking fit, too.

She looked like she was an outcast. She had, like, that big green coat on. She's just cool. Yeah. There's just things. That's why i think like forever there will always just be uh uh like a glass ceiling or maybe just a full full fucking season what i don't know why i just did that yeah you're a weirdo i mean you're a fucking autistic weirdo that's why that was one i was like that like i do weird things like that one line do you see the video me eating the sandwich?

When you're just dancing? That's what I was doing while women were crying at Brianna Why are people like me? I was going to say this for myself, but I'll lump you in there too There's just a ceiling for us because we're just not that cool We're cool, but we're not

that cool I don't want to cry about the guy inhaling a Jimmy John's sub and bopping his shoulders wishing the Bruins were on the radio. Yo, that's funny. You trying to get the Bruins on the fucking TV? I was like, yo, it'd be wild if, like, imagine a goal got scored. Like, wow, you big bitch go nuts. Middle of March man

can you put on a regular season Bruins game go fuck yourself they won 7-0 by the way even worse imagine if you were

watching a blowout hockey game so it's 5-0 but maybe it'll be 6 but yeah I mean there are certain people that just look

and talk and walk and carry themselves in a way where it's like you got it you got it and we fake it we build it we like, ah, you got it. You got it. And we fake it.

We build it. We don't have it, you know? Very slowly. It was awesome. It was insane. Pirate water was all over the place. It was great. Dude, pirate water is a hit.

It's fucking fun to watch. It's exactly what I wanted it to be, like a party drink that this age group is like, fuck yeah. Oh, it fucking worked. And people give a hard time, too. I think Boston, because they close the bars early, 7 o'clock last night, I think. The fact that they were open past 11 a.m.

Yeah. Should be a war crime. I mean, people start at like 7 in the morning. You've got like a full night's worth of drinking hours by noon. It was... And the hotel we stayed in, I started this by saying, common man, I'll be in the mix with the people. I'm going to end it by saying

from now on when I'm sent to party weekends, I'm staying at the Ritz. Dude, we were in like a fucking like a fucking I don't know, it was like a marriott's

version of a holiday in like this fucking little hotel and everyone staying there was 12 and shit-faced like it was it was dude and like the first night my first night there i know they were drunk the everyone everyone in that hotel was hammered the entire time and my first night there i got in kind of whatever i went to grab some dinner with Paz and my buddy. And I got back a little later. And I went to the gym. And I was working out. And, like, the bike was set up right by – and I was doing, like, a quick workout.

And, like, the bike was set up by the, like, glass door where you can, like, see whatever. And there's a bar in the hotel. And so I'm on the bike. I'm doing, like, minute the bike, a minute push-ups, a minute sit-ups. It's like a quick little circuit, 20 minutes. Just feel a little sweating. And I see as I'm on the bike, some dude walking,

like stumbling towards, because the bathroom was right there too. And I see some dude stumbling towards the bathroom. And I'm like, God damn it. I know what the age group is. I know what's going to happen. And he goes to the bathroom.

I'm like, okay. Do my push-ups. Do my sit-ups. And I sit up and I look and there's just this fucking hammer dude standing there like this. Like a zombie. Yeah. And I fucking pop a headphone off. I'm like, what's up?

He's like, what's your name, bro? Tom. What's your last name jones do you look a lot like feidelberg and i and i go yeah i fucking i go i get that all the time and i put my headphone on and just start doing sit-ups again and he just stands over me for like a minute like staring like trying to and he kind of gives me one of these and he walks out. And I was like, I was going to get friends to be like, this guy looks like Fidelberg. So I'm just fucking leaving.

So I ended my workout. Well, I will say the only thing you got going for you is the Fidelberg. There are a lot of people. I dropped that. I was just a dude. If someone goes, are you Fidelberg? I say, I forget what the question is. I can just read the person.

And I'm like, if they're not positive, I go, no, I get that a lot. If they're like, what's up, man? I'm like, I lied to somebody. But if someone's on the fence, I push them the other way. Just let them believe, yeah. But I was like. There was another one this weekend, another great one. Even had the beard.

I was like, god damn. Really? Yeah. I didn't see that one. Because I'll say this i have done something and it's changed my life a little bit okay again i said recently i did my push notice off for twitter yep i am in full-time do not disturb mode now on my phone cool and cool and not before yep it is unbelievable so i i've been i i did i got a now that granted there is a bit of caveat bit of a caveat here so i only had my phone for two days It is unbelievable. So I've been... Dude, I got a...

Granted, there is a bit of a caveat here because I only had my phone for two days. I got my weekly status report for screen time. Way down. Again, this is an extreme, extreme situation because I only had it for two days and it was the weekend and shit like that. Guess what my screen time was?

How many hours? Or not even? Minutes? Wow. Not even one hour? 16 minutes. Again. You were on your phone for 16 minutes in two days?

Two days. 16 minutes a day was my average. So it was just Friday, Saturday. But it was 16 minutes a day. And it was, bro, I... I'm on my phone for 16 minutes every 17 minutes. It was, bro, I'm on my phone for 16 minutes every 17 minutes. It was, it's, and I started it because Saturday I went to lunch with my buddy and went to, it's actually, I actually have something to say about Boston as a whole too, but this

is like the one good restaurant in Boston still is Atlantic Fish Co. I fucking, it's my favorite restaurant in Boylston. And so I went there for lunch and and they actually they hooked it up they came out and they were like they're like hey it's on us and i was like that's incredibly nice but this is a funny thing that happened too is i was like i had a very low-key weekend uh we went we went to bars i was out of bars from like 11 a.m to 11 11 p.m. every day, but just like super low-key. And this was Saturday afternoon, and he's like, it's on us, whatever. And I was like, that's really nice.

I had to run to an ATM because I was going to tip the waiter still. And so I run to an ATM. I took out $200. And I was just thinking like back – like thinking back a decade, what Bank of America would be thinking. It's like, it's 2pm on St. Patrick's Day weekend. Alarms are going off at Bank of America. Feidelberg's getting himself a satchel. He's getting on one, boys. This credit card's

going to start running. It's right about that time. They're going one way or the other. Saturday afternoon, St. Patrickurday afternoon weekend the boy's going he's spending it all this weekend folks and dude but the when i when i went out to go get to the atm i looked at my phone and i checked my text and i had 18 text messages and i do not disturb you don't even get like it doesn't pop up right like no noise it just doesn't come up and I was like and I had such a fun lunch and I was like if that was during lunch and it wasn't even like it wasn't like 18 it wasn't like a group text problem it's like 18 I had 18 text

messages there was a group text but it like I probably had 12 individual text messages too and I was like if that was in my pocket or on the table, every little would have annoyed me a little bit more. And then a little bit more. And then a little bit more. And I would not have had this fun lunch. I would not have had a good time. And I was like, I'm not going back. I'm doing how to start.

What sucks is like, you know, it's reached a point where like that will probably be a problem. Not a real problem. But it'll be like well i needed i needed you know something for work well i told jackie jackie knows if you just call me twice the second call gets pushed through yeah and but even still it's like i don't know back in the day sometimes like you needed to get in touch with someone from work and you just didn't until monday it's not you know i know we you know we're trying to do big things here and it's the internet and you got to be available and all that shit but sometimes it's also like

unless it's like true life or death the ad won't be in the show this week or whatever the shit happens that's crazy, 16 minutes it's even a day well I think I'm going to sorry, one more thing

before we go I have to say this about this. This is probably my first time back in Boston for an extended period of time since COVID. I've gone to a game here and there. I've driven back to my parents' house or whatever. This is probably my first time spending an extended period of time in Boston since COVID. And I am asked all the time still to this day by people I grew up with, people my parents are friends with, family members, whatever. Like, so is New York back yet?

Is New York back yet? I'm like, yeah, we're back in three fucking months. It's totally normal. Never your change, eh? Boston is not. Really? Dude, it like – I thought you were about to say like we're back.

No, dude. It is like I – I'm going to be throwing caveats all episode it was one weekend obviously it was but it's st patrick's it's a crazy weekend but so so i was looking for a different scene than that so like i well i didn't want to go to a bar jam to gill's like we were looking for bars that were a little higher end or whatever not even higher end but just like yeah you know not a bunch of hammer colleges that's just not what I want to do right now. Right. And so we're looking for a little more low key bars

where it's not banging music and we don't have to yell. I'm catching up with old friends. Sure. We want to talk and have a drink. And it was, and again, I haven't been to Boston in a while.

Maybe the new spots are elsewhere, but like Boylston used to be where we hung out, like Back Bay. And it like, just there aren't bars anymore. There are banks now. Like Whiskey's the bar we used to go to, Lear. Like those aren't bars anymore they're banks now like like whiskey's the bar we used to go to leer like those are just fucking they're gone and it was like everything

was just like fucking it wasn't great it was like i was i was underwhelmed again i understand it's a very different weekend yo good thing you're off your phone because your mentions are about to be fuck you photo bird it was It was like, it just, and I was out with my buddies who still live in Boston, and they're like, it's like this, man. And they knew. They were more mad than me. Some of the places, the service was bad.

No, it's over. I don't even know if it's COVID stuff. I tried to do a full scumbag, balls-to-the-wall weekend, and I couldn't figure out I couldn't find a way to do it I was with people that I knew from Boston and they were like

this is what we do what? that's crazy it was kind of surprising I was like wow this is pretty nuts no I'm not saying people aren't wearing masks

and shit like that obviously but it was just like it was the service in particular was crazy dude we walked out of a bar we were really the only people at the bar

and there were three bartenders. And it took them, I don't know, we waited 15 minutes. They never came over to ask what we wanted. We're like, all right, we'll go somewhere else. And that's not really a COVID thing. That's more of a whatever. You know how fucking hard it takes for me to get a little annoyed with service. I was like, this is fucking...

Guys, let's get the fuck... And it was their idea, actually. But I was like, yeah, let's get the fuck out of here. This is crazy. Something happened the other day where somebody spoke of the pandemic or something like that, like in the present tense or whatever it was. And I was like, oh, it was something to do with the movies, I think. Going to the movies.

Oh, it was the Oscars, I think. They were like the nominations for best pictures that were viewed as is intended in the theaters. And I was like, we've been doing theaters for like a couple years. Yeah, but this, and I don't know the film industry enough to know how it worked

and any of that shit, but like people talk about Top Gun 2, like it saved movies. Yeah. And that was a summer. I guess so, yeah. It was funny. I looked up like the Oscars

and I was looking at like a list of Oscars trying to get ready for the dozen because I thought Jeff D. Lowe was going to I looked up, like, the Oscars, and I was looking at, like, a list of Oscars, trying to get ready for the dozen, because I thought Jeff D. Lowe was going to do Oscar stuff, which he did. And, like, it was 2020 or 2021 or whatever. It was like, that's a great trivia question. Do you know the Oscar in 2021? It's like... 2021. Or whichever, like, the bad year was, where there was, like, no movies.

It's like, it's a movie you've, like... The that's it's it's i can't even the artist was definitely it was a it was like a whole bunch of movies that i was just like i've never even fucking heard of these how's it possible i'm not good with the years for movies though like that's all kind of fucking whatever but the other funny thing about boston uh was and this is just like going back. When I grew up in Boston, I never thought of like, wow, Boston's pretty white. Just because this is all I knew. But we get to Boston and we're going to a bar and I got an Uber.

And I was like, is this dude's name fucking Scott? That's how many white people are here? We're driving Ubers, dude? Bro, go sell insurance. What are you doing here? driving Ubers, dude? Bro, go sell insurance. What are you doing here? Regular fucking job, dude. That's hilarious. What was it?

It was not. Maybe it was a nomination because I do remember CODA. I do remember that. I think it was like the nominees. I was like, I've never heard of any of these other ones. The only reason I know CODA was because of that.

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Personal trainer is one of the biggest rackets of all time. The real ones, for sure, great. The meatheads who are just like, I lift and I want to get paid when I'm at the gym, who are telling you what to do, and then I'll get a whole year of FitBod. It'll be a way better investment. Keep up your fitness habit with a personalized workout program from FitBod. Go to FitBod.me slash KFC. That's F-I-T-B-O-D dot M-E slash K-F-C,

and get 25% off your subscription. You can try the app for free right now. That's fitbod.me slash KFC. So you're going to do not disturb. And I am officially going to take Pabst's tweeting right this way. Pabst went fucking

I said I was going to give my Twitter account to Pabst. And then he immediately hops on and tweets like an absolute asshole for four straight days about the World Baseball Classic. Also somehow made up old tweets? Yeah. Somehow he fucked with Twitter and sent old tweets? I know he's good with the Photoshop shit,

so he made a bunch of tweets about Mexicans and Puerto Ricans in 2013. I couldn't believe it. What a fucking dickhead. I'm going to give Marcus Stroman your phone number. I'm officially going to bequeath my Twitter account to Paps. It's been something we've been kicking around for a long

time, and I think this weekend was a good farewell. A good finale. I'm not doing it out of... I know people think that I'm an asshole. I don't mind doing it like out of like a like i like like i know people think that i'm an asshole i don't mind doing it i people are like i was playing with my kids and hanging out i would occasionally look and be like fire off a tweet yeah like it's not like i sit there people think a tweet takes way more yeah they're like put your phone down or go outside i was like

i was at the park with my kids they're running around i would open it up i would see a a mention like at the top that i didn't like and i would quote tweet it and put it back the same way i do like every other thing you know every other time i have my phone out so it's not like i'm uh you know like i was embarrassed or ashamed it's not like uh i even kind of enjoy it but it's just time because i know that it's uh two things one it's just bad for like my health even if I do enjoy it. And two, we've reached a point where Twitter doesn't matter. And you can't convince anybody of anything otherwise. So I like arguing and I like debating, but it's totally pointless now. You probably didn't see this because you were suspended.

But when you got suspended, I tweeted. I did see that after the fact though. Fight over he said I bet he feels like a serial killer who got caught. I definitely did. Thank god. I obviously I obviously

was never going to stop. I'm going to dig my heels in and we're going to do this as long as dumb motherfuckers are replying. Or if something else really big happens. I was waiting for another story, but nothing was really happening. I was going to go forever because I'm a stubborn asshole, and this is what I do, and this is how I've made my fucking money and life. I'm almost like, yeah, this is good.

I mean, I will say there's a lot of fans that agree with me, but I'm. What are you doing? I don't know, man. Don't put that in your mouth. I don't. That's grosser than fucking Ari's asshole. That's disgusting, that thing. I don't know why I did that.

Don't put your nose in it either. I always put my nose in it. Yeah, sometimes I do. It feels good. I usually do my chin. Yeah, I tickle my chin. Right on my, right on my scruff. I go like that, and I'll be like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I give myself little chills. And the, and the, yeah, do a cracking. I give myself little chills. And they're like, crack an egg on your head. And the yolk is right on your head. We're idiots. But we wash our hands. Nah. Nah, we don't wash our hands. I pee all over them.

I don't even know what I'm saying. It's just I, when I'm right, and I know that I'm right, and I, oh, wait, what was the answer? You are largely right about the BBC. The most right I think I've ever been, and people are trying to be like, take this L and race you and shit. I'm like, just because you dumb fucking assholes aren't understanding doesn't mean it's a loss. I'm fucking right.

I'll middle it a little bit, where I'll say I obviously have not watched a single game. I didn't even know it was coming up, to be totally honest. I don't know where it was played. I didn't know when it was happening. I was having a hard time figuring out what was going on with the – definitely there's some in Arizona, but then I was like, that's in Japan. I didn't really get it. And obviously I will also admit fully that I have said before that baseball was definitely the biggest sport

that took a hit for me from the pandemic. It has not really come back. I think it's because it was the only sport that took a hit for me from the pandemic. It has not really come back. I think it's because it was the only sport that tried to do a full season in it. Everyone else was kind of in the playoffs and shit like that. I guess football did too. They played empty stadiums. But baseball, I was just like, it's not really doing it for me. And the Red Sox

sucking the whole time since then has played a pretty big factor in it as well. So my baseball mind has not really been in there. So I didn't know anything really. So obviously I am on your side in the case since that Americans don't care. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I will also say that the tweets I see, the clips look electric.

I was surprised by how much there was a jump from the last one to this one where it was like last time people literally didn't give a fuck. It was a waste of time to even do this. The people there and the players in it are having a blast for sure.

The thing got so fucking warped. By the way, if you don't even know what I'm talking about, I fought on Twitter for four straight days because Edwin Diaz broke his leg in a game for Team Puerto Rico. And I was like these games – Oh, he broke his leg? No, yeah. I was thinking he tore his patella. Oh, okay.

I was thinking Kendrick Morales broke his leg celebrating on home plate. I don't know what it is, but baseball players are pussies and they need to stop celebrating. Baseball players have the most ridiculous injuries of all time. It's like just stop. Always. People were like, what do you want them to be, in a bubble and never do anything? I'm like, yeah, kind of, because apparently they can't do anything. They can't walk up and down steps.

They can't jump off the curb. They can't jump on home plate. They can't do dog piles. Can't open a bottle of wine. Bottles of wine. They can't play video games. They can't do anything without getting injured. So I'm like, yeah, I think you guys should do nothing but the thing that you're paid to do. My stance was always, the games don't mean a lot, meaning like if you have that on your record, it doesn't matter.

No one's going to be like, well, Mike Trout never won the World Series, but he was Team USA. It's like, no, no, no. You're a fucking joke artist. That's all you play. I'll say this. If that jump from the last one to this one makes the same kind of jump next time. If it keeps going. It might be um the uh so

like the the meaning behind it i think is is uh one of my main issues the fact that you just have a fucking job and you get paid like millions of dollars to do it and then you just go do what you like and you can't do it anymore like the rest of the world gets fucking fired for that that's just like you have a commitment i don't like that argument though because the rest of the world i get that we get that a lot like that doesn't work in the real world well i'm different than you man i think in the real world if you were to like risk your job and couldn't do it you would get fired but what i'm saying is like people said to me oh yeah in a real job you get fired I don't have a real job but I also think that this almost is

the only example where it's like didn't somebody use an example of fights if like the stripper punctured his larynx or something with the heel and then you can't do your job anymore

dumb fucking argument but this is the only like only way there's other things it's like you know i think a lot of things you can't ride motorcycles you can't do extreme sports like there's a lot of shit put in clauses that's like you can't do this because if you are injured and you're out like you i don't know whatever it's void or whatever it is i think this is an example where it is kind of like bringing it back to the real world where it's like, I don't know. Thank God that Steve Cohen is like an awesome owner and he's like, whatever you need, we just want to help you get healthy.

I would have been like, fuck this. I would have called everybody home. I would have been like, none of you can play anymore. And then my other thing is the, like, if it's all about growing the game and the sport i don't think you need the biggest superstars because the the the audience that already likes that is there for the patriotism and the just the gameplay like the sport itself you can send your biggest prospects and college players and amateurs or or guys who are like retiring who like aren't risking their their prime and a World Series year.

And those guys will still love it because the Karabases of the world and Ben Verlanders of the world are fucking like baseball. But those guys are – and even in hockey terms, I'm not like those guys. I'm not that level of diehard. I'm very, very largely a Bruins fan. I'm not watching... I think it's so weird to watch the whole sport. I'll occasionally pop on a McDavid game that's large, that's mostly

is, you know, it's pretty rare to catch me watching some Western Conference hockey game. I think I watched Rangers fucking Pens the other day. It's like on Saturday afternoon if it's just on, but also hockey they play so often. It's pretty much I watch the Bruins or I watch a movie the next night and I watch the Bruins again.

They play three games a week. I watch TV the other nights. But the again, the only way I can relate to this really is to change stuff to hockey. They did try and fuck with that a little bit with the last Olympics. Right. Because Tavares fucked up his knee and they were like, we're never doing this again. They said, we're sending kids. And that, I don't think it translates.

I don't think it. I think you have to build it. I think that is when it gets to a point where actually the Olympic gold medal means something or the World Cup like means something yeah if it gets there fine I just don't think it's there and I think right now

there's either a better time to play it or there's a better way to field it and and then also just a general argument of like

Twitter's not real life and like no one in America watches this and that got spun into like I'm some xenophobic racist like I get it but it's also just like

yeah this is my life where I live talking to people who share this lifestyle with me like there's a billion people who watch the cricket final you wouldn't walk around saying that cricket matters it's meaningless

to us MLS NASCAR has huge fans and if you really want to hear like the me Dan and Dave did it on the rundown on Monday so if you go listen to hear like the me dan and dave did it on the rundown on monday so if you go listen to monday's rundown we really like exhaustively talk about it like down to every last bit i know that people probably this audience doesn't want to hear it as much but what got crazy was the uh the all of a sudden i'm a racist because i'm mad that I lost my closer was the most annoying part. Also, anyone with a fucking brain, if you have a good team and you lose one of your best players,

you're going to have a bit of a bias to the tournament as a whole. It's like a good team. It's also our MVP. It's arguably the most irreplaceable guy out there. That's how good he is in a one-year window. We have a one-year window. And it's right now. And now it's shot. So yeah, they're like, you wouldn't be

saying this if Diaz and Pogge was like, yeah, no fucking kidding I wouldn't. I wouldn't be talking about this at all. You're all welcome, World Baseball Classic and baseball nerds. I know a lot of fans did agree with me, that didn't say it publicly, but did agree with me. I also, at the same time, think I completely drove the narrative.

People's all tweeting, like, these games are not meaningful, these games are not meaningful. I think it was all directed at me. So I think that... I did see a lot from people, like, Karabas I obviously know is in the mix. I did see tweets occasionally from like Other shows and outlets People being like they say it doesn't matter

I was like I think you might be talking to Kevin One person Or guess what Or if you're talking to that many people Then that many people are saying it doesn't matter That's a big number of people Pick your poison you're responding to one single person Or responding to everyone who thinks it doesn't matter

Yeah yeah yeah, yeah. That was like – I felt like I had the baseball world like in my fingertips at that point. I do believe that the Bruins do not play tomorrow or today if you're listening to this on Tuesday. In which case, did I believe the champions tonight? If the Bruins are on, I will not be watching the World Baseball Classic. I might tune in for the final if it's not. I'll probably watch Luther. Good choice.

Did you just start it? I'm currently re-watching old ones, and I'm going to do the new one. Oh, okay. Nice. Wait, I didn't know you watched it before. Yeah. Oh. I didn't know that.

I actually, when I was re-watching to get ready for the new one, I realized I never watched season five. Season five is fine. Yeah. It's good. Season five is really good. We also have, if you watch Yellow Jackets that's coming back and something else is coming back.

There's some good TV about to come back. So I'll be watching that. I also I think this way about New York too. A lot of people say to me, why do you hate the Yankees? New York is my existence. That's what matters to me. So in my

bubble, it's like the Mets and the Yankees. So even if we don't play each other, that's who I see, that's who I interact with, those fans, that's my life. That's kind of the same thing here. It's like, I know Japan loves it. China's, by the way, China's ratings, they're skewed. That doesn't count.

There's always going to be a billion people in China watching whatever China does. But I'm like, and that becomes like,'t you like have any respect for the other people in the world I don't disrespect Venezuela I just don't fucking care that they like this I don't I'm not gonna just start liking something that's what I hated about Karabas' blog

he wrote in 2017 being like I don't care about the world baseball classic but if everybody else starts caring so will I I get what he means like if we all agree that this is this has weight. But it's like, that's almost what bothers me the most. Is it just feels like overnight, a bunch of people on Twitter and a bunch of fans at the ballpark decided this matters. And I was like, but no, this doesn't matter.

You have to like build up. You have to like create some sort of cachet or, you know, it has to have some sort of meaning. And I will say that too about the hockey thing where like, yes, the pros go now, but that didn't start until like the 90s I think. Like the 1980 team, that was a bunch of college kids versus the Russian Red Army. A lot of people said you have to play

professionals for international competition. It was strictly the opposite for the vast majority of Olympic competition. Now, to be fair, the Olympics already had the name and the cache we're speaking of. Yeah. So you could have... So you gotta build it somewhere, but it's like, I don't know, maybe you can't. Maybe sports... We've seen other sports

try to grow, like variations of the big leagues and different sports. Like, I don't know. We might just have our sports. Yeah. And our tournaments and our things, you know? But, I mean, again, this looks... All I've seen are a couple Trey turner home runs and shit like that but like i i put on the volume like whoa it's loud yeah and uh the the social

media thing is a bit skewed because it's like baseball mlb notoriously suppresses like they don't let anybody do social media you know bryce harper the guys were sending it in my uh in my group chat bryce harper has been in like the public eye as the superstar baseball since he was 7 16 he has 1.7 million followers on ig kyle kuzma has 5 million like it's like he should have like a hundred million yeah you know like the the biggest scrubs in the nba are like quadrupling up the iconic generational players in baseball. It's crazy, man. Mike Trout doesn't even have an Instagram.

Yeah. I mean, yeah, he's got – and that's all well and good. He does, right? He does, but I bet he has like $400,000. $2 million. $2 million. That's probably the highest – or it's so high, but that doesn't really count. It's the thing that fucking crushed

me the most because you can people are yelling at me about ratio and they're sending these stats and these videos and it's like you're not arguing the point so whatever the whole time I'm like everything I've said has been logical no one has answered any of my actual

questions I am winning this argument and then I was fighting with Marcus Stroman, that little fucking weasel, that race-baiting Napoleonic motherfucker. Is he Little Vella? His entire thing is H-M-D-H. Height doesn't measure heart. And it's like if you make your entire brand about your height, like we know what your insecurity is but that's like when fucking mike i don't like trump mike scott started uh using acronyms to save time but it took so long to explain what they fucking meant i mean like it's like just just say it i said height doesn't measure

heart but it measures your personality and you fucking stink dude um but i was talking to dominican dylan my boy boy from my serious days, and he was like, fuck Marcus Stroman. That dude was talking so much shit about Puerto Rico when he played for the Americans. That's the other thing I don't like. You can just play for whoever you want. Wait, does he play for Puerto Rico now?

Yes. Oh. And I think... I saw there was a Sullivan on Italy. That shouldn't be allowed. There's a lot of Italians. Mike Piazza just played for the Italians. I think Giancarlo Stanton said he was going to one year or did play for Italy.

There's a cool story about Randy Rosarena, like why he's playing for Mexico. That actually is a good story. But also it's like if you can just flip, like it's just more like his main up. It is. Brett Hull, hockey,ed for both USA and Canada. But he did have actual dual citizenship. I would imagine John Carlos Stanton doesn't have dual citizenship. It felt like if your mom was from there, we'll take you.

If you're a literal citizen of both countries, then you can do whatever you want, I guess. But it's also just fucking – you should pick one. Yeah, yeah. Because that was a big deal. I think he changed from – Yeah, that's fucking crazy crazy you can't do that i forget if he did well he's because his dad has played for the blackhawks he's probably born in america so i'm guessing he started playing for america then switched to canada yeah um i feel like they're like it's where my heart is or whatever it's like fuck up so so he was on america and switched to puerto rico this year

and when they played last time um so Dominican Dylan says, fuck him. Like he talks so much shit about Puerto Rico. I can't believe that he's even on the team. And I'm DMing with him. I'm like, really? What did he say? Because I'm like, I want to – give me all the info. And Dylan didn't see the Twitter DM forever.

So I start Googling it and what i found was a excerpt that's that said stroman stole headlines from kinsler who said and it the way that sentence was structured i thought the who was talking about stroman and what kinsler said was we're going to show the puerto ricans the dominicans the right way to play the game and i thought i hadrowman saying that because of the way it was written and I just got so overexcited. So I tweet out that screenshot and it's like, that's it. It's over. It doesn't matter.

All the other points I've made, all the other logic out the fucking window. I blew it. I've never had, I think that was the biggest Twitter argument misstep of my career. Really? I've always spun my I think that was the biggest Twitter argument misstep of my career. Really? I've always spun my way out of whatever.

Like I was even about to say like, yeah, yeah, but he played for the team that was saying that about Puerto Rico. And now he's on Puerto Rico. But I was like, nope, I'm just going to wear this one. I was like – I tweeted him. I was like, yo, shouldn't have done that. Sorry. But you're still trash for calling me a fucking racist. But I – the feeling of like – I was like like that's four days of arguing down the drain all of this for nothing nothing and that's why uh it's time to turn it over so will i'll i'll give you the password

and then but now i guess you have to change the password oh you're going over over like i'll still i'll still. I don't know about that. I'll still send a tweet and I just pop it back in my pocket. It is actually the coolest thing. But I just don't. I can't control myself. When I go on Twitter and I always have the 20 plus, I like that. I don't know if I can do it because I do like to argue and debate and all that shit.

But I also do get a lot of my info from Twitter and shit. That's why I still use it like that. And I honestly do. a lot of my info from Twitter and shit. That's why I still use it like that. And I honestly do. It's so weird, too. I do feel bad that I – like there are people I like, and there are people who I want to see. But it's not worth it. Be they Twitter people or be they employees.

I won't even see if an employee replies to me anymore unless I looked at Twitter at that time. And I feel bad. Because even when an employee, a co-worker replies to me, I usually at least throw it a heart, even if it's not worthy of a reply. I'm like, yeah, pretty good. Whatever. I got you. And I will not be doing that anymore unless I happen to see it. And that kind of sucks.

But the benefits far outweigh that. This is a five-day trial period. Yeah, we'll see. I'm definitely in a – not a better mood. I'm not happy. Don't get me wrong. But I'm less annoyed. In fact, last night when we were texting, I was in bed and I didn't want to – like when I'm going about my day, I don't mind not immediately replying to a text because it's no i'm doing

shit i'm working on whatever i'm doing uh but like i'm just laying in bed i'm like well i should be timely and prompt my reply here yeah and so i turned i turned off do not disturb last night for just a little bit i was texting with you and i was texting with nate and the buzz is now they're like it's like it's like dennis on on family feud when it's like Dennis on Family Feud. It's like... It gives you PTSD. I couldn't... Even those five days free from it, I couldn't do it anymore.

I was like, I gotta go back on Do Not Disturb. I mean, I feel like watching what Chris DiStefano, his entire change... I've at least got to try that. And if it doesn't work it doesn't work but i'm trying to think if there's like any also twitter is a waste of time and like this will force me to go i'll just go on instagram more that's all that's gonna happen by the way but that's it like if i'm putting up more stories and doing that kind of shit because i'm not on twitter theoretically like i'm doing my job better maybe maybe maybe we do a a trial run because like it's

almost like you know if i'm a crack addict and i'm like hold on to my crack for me and then i come to you like give me my crack yeah well i'm not supposed to give it back to you but let's say we'll do a five-day period yeah and at the end of five days i'm like this i couldn't figure out what to do for one minute man and this is not, all that kind of shit. I'll take it back. Not take it back, but I'll, like, you know. The Mets season, well, we got three weeks. No, we got ten days till the Mets start. Ten days till the Mets start?

Jesus. Nah, that's a lie. That's a lie. I mean, it's early April. April 1st. Ten days. So, I mean, do you want to try it then? Because right now you're going to have nothing to. When's the Mets start?

Yeah, all right, let's do that. When the Mets start. When the Mets start? Yeah, all right, let's do that. When the Mets start. When the Mets start, yeah. By the way, Barstool to Ballpark tickets on sale for real baseball where you can get unlimited beer and a free meal with all your tickets. Bobby Bonilla Day on a Saturday this year. So we have Barstool to Ballpark for Bobby Bonilla Day along with another. They're playing in Fenway this year.

We should go up to a game. Oh, maybe we could do one there. I don't know how Boston works. But anyway, yeah, so go get your tickets now. It's a weird URL. It's not like it used to be just Mets.com slash Barstool. So go to Clem's Twitter because I don't know if I'll be

tweeting it. You used to run my account though. You used to run my account. Yeah. All right. Now we have a really important thing to discuss right now. I know we have a lot of bathroom habits being discussed at Parcel Sports. I got the most horrific one. You saw it or you did it?

I heard it. I heard it yesterday, and I'm going to let the guy tell his story. Pabst. Oh, no. Once it slipped out. Wait. Hold on. Hold on.

You should have kept this one in the apartment. It is crazy. You unplugged it. This is after the parade yesterday. We went, grabbed some famous garlic bread over at... Check, check. Alta something. Alta Strada at the Logan Airport.

It says famous on the menu. You got to get it. Of course. Great garlic bread. And we're just hanging out. We got there like way before our flight. So we're just kind of hanging out in the restaurant. Pavs had himself two Peronis and decided to share this with the class.

A couple weeks ago... You don't remember this? You're at the table. No, couple weeks ago... You don't remember this? You're at the table. I know, I was sober. You don't remember this? You guys both brushed it off. I'm like, that's not going to be brought up. That's fine.

Oh, I wrote it down. It's me, you. I went to the dentist a couple weeks ago. He said, good teeth, your gums are fucked. You have to get an electric toothbrush. So I splurged on an electric toothbrush. I got a nice one. 50 bucks.

I've never spent more than $5 on a toothbrush. And then the first day... I believe he said he splurged. I splurged on it. And then I was peeing. I was bad at pee while I was brushing my teeth. In a very clean, like fresh, clean toilet. And I dropped it and i just picked it back up and i went out to

a couch of all my roommates i was like i just dropped my brand new toothbrush in the toilet i'm leaving this up to you guys do i keep clean of course they said yes like whatever toilet mouth go ahead you're like you're a pussy if you throw it. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, just keep it. So I just cleaned it four or five times, let it sit for a day or two. That's dirty moves, all that. Bro. And how long ago was this? This is like, I would say three weeks ago. I've been using it ever since.

Let me say this. I'm not going to be hypocritical here. I dropped it into a clean toilet. Bro, what? I'm just saying this. Let me say this. If I'm his age and I drop it into a clean toilet. Bro, what? I'm just saying this. Let me say this. If I'm his age and I drop it into a clean toilet, it's like a 50-50 coin toss. What I am never doing is telling people.

That's insane, bro. Everybody does weird, gross hygiene shit on their own. You pick your nose. You pick your ass. You're doing this. You pick your nose. You pick your ass. You're doing this. You're doing that. You do weird things. You eat off the floor.

Whatever happens when nobody's looking, it happens. Human bodies are weird. To offer that up to them and then to them is fucking insane. Dude, I'm a disgusting animal. And if I drop my toothbrush in the toilet, I'm using mouthwash that day, skipping the toothbrush, and I'm buying a new one the next day. I know, but we – I probably am too if I'm being real about it. But like we talked about earlier, like last episode I think, like replacing toothbrushes just like from wear and tear. Like it's as simple as just like, oh, you're at the store.

Buy one. And we just don't do that. Yeah. So I'm just thinking like I could go or I could just could just you know like run it under the water a little bit i'll be honest your toothbrush is probably regularly pretty fucking disgusting you put it right back in your mouth it's it's not it's not if a toothbrush floated maybe i'd have a different point here maybe i have a different but an electric, it's sinking into the hole. It's getting into the hole.

It was one of those like, in and out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Quite a right as it was made. I mean, people put their fucking phone right back up to their face, you know? Exactly, yeah. I only ever drop my phone in the toilet.

No? I drop everything in the toilet. I don't know why. I drop so much shit in the toilet. And I do. What else are you dropping? I dropped my lotion the other day. Brand new lotion.

Dropped it. I threw that one out. I dropped my lotion the other day. Brand new lotion. Dropped it. I threw that one out. I just went, no. The bottle that I touch every now and then, that's gone. But my mouth. All the fucking stuff inside it was clean, bro. Like, that would have been totally. It was like, I had enough.

I was like, I'm done fucking dropping things in the toilet and buying new ones. This is where I draw the line and it's where the toothbrush. So wait, you said this at lunch and those two just went like, eh, whatever? I saw fights like, scribble a little bit. I had a little bit of scaries after that. I was like, that might have been a mistake, but I thought you just forgot about it. Bro, I emailed myself and wrote it down.

Pav's toothbrush. That is disgusting. You're gross, but you're just gross. Yeah, it is kind of par for the course. And then, I think you've said it before once you've said it, but then you talk about him and his roommate sharing a toothbrush for two months. Yeah, that's mean.

Well, that was unknowingly, right? That was unknowingly. Once you found out, you stopped, right? Yeah, no, we cut that off. Right? We cut that off. Right? That, like, it hitting the bottom, because that, like the touching bottom is the problem for me

because guess what you know what else touches the bottom every piece of poop gets sucked down just like your toothpaste every piece of toilet paper scraped by on that yeah every fucking piece of fecal matter it all it's got to be gone by now though like yeah it's all in your belly it's in your it's Every piece of toilet paper scraped by on that. Every fucking piece of fecal matter. It all hit it. It's got to be gone by now, though. Yeah, it's all in your belly. It's in your mouth. Nothing happened.

It's in your shit mouth. Dude, I made sure no one told her. That's what I said to my roommates. I was like, she doesn't find out about it. She'll never find out now. It was all a bit, honey. Jackie's going to cut all this. Speaking of Jackie.

Video. No, I was going to going to cut all this. Yeah. Speaking of Jackie. Video. No, I was going to be on a short video as well. But no, videos can be Thursdays. But you actually, you are supposed to have a video ready for us. But you had a busy weekend. I literally, like, have not had a second since the last one. Okay, that's fair. You had a busy weekend.

You flew to Atlanta for a wedding, flew to Boston for the parade. You had a busy weekend. Okay. Which isie's punishment oh right fuck um i kind of like the helmet yeah i think the helmet's great i had another um i missed the helmet the helmet is to recap she has to go on a date well that's her quick get out of jail like she either has to wear the helmet for like how long? A week. Like 24-7 for a week. Or if she goes on

like a full-blown date with it. It's not just like immediate. It'll be like two days. You can shave like over half. I would rather just rip the band-aid off. So you have to schedule a date. But that's, I feel like that is very much

equivalent to, I won't argue what? she wants it to be done right away going on a date is very much equivalent to I'll go on a date and I'll wear it once in the office whoa this is what you did last time sorry, sorry, sorry

we're going to tell you what the fuck to do so let me just also set some parameters because I don't want you just fucking picking any old felon. Yeah, we have to approve of this. Yeah, this has to be a guy who has less than two DUIs. He has to have no felonies.

So genuine. I don't know. He has to be like someone that your friends would be like, this guy's nice. You should give him a chance. You have to show up in a bike helmet. Okay, I'll go on Hinge and I will send.

Also, I'm going to make one more thing. If you guys are proving it and she's finding somebody on Hinge, can we just play the game on camera where she casts it to the TV and we decide? Yeah, we look at your Hinge and we say, like, DM this guy. Okay. Also, I would prefer if upon arrival you have like your phone in your pocket and you at least

have a voice recording and when he says what the fuck is this about you have to be like it's dangerous out here, right? I know. You can't be like ah, this is a thing.

No, no, no. You have to be like what if I fall and hit my head? What are you talking about? I mean, I have to like record the whole thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's going to happen.

Okay. And I won't like at that point like the only other good I would get out of it is like at least a funny video. So like I won't. Oh, that's the only good. Yeah, yeah. What if it's like the man of your dream?

I know. Well, then – Then he'll find his – But if he's the man of your dream, you'll like him. That's a wild card. This is great. Yeah. I mean also you have to get like decked out.

Like you can't just be like mailing it in. Like you have to be like dolled up, wear what you would normally wear, makeup, hair done like you would normally do. Bike helmet. We also will buy the bike helmet. I will pick it out. I'm deciding whether it needs to be an old person one or maybe a little boy one that has stegosaurus things.

Keegan has one that's like a dragon. It looks like dragon scales. I actually almost think that's too goofy I think it should be like specialized there's a fucking white bike helmet that's like

Tour de France like a racing one are we talking like a biker helmet or a no no no like a bicycle oh okay

yeah originally I was thinking about a motorcycle just because it would be like so hard but yeah we're just talking like under the chin

buckle no not a chin strap of course a chin strap what if it falls off? Yeah. What if he's cute? Yeah, well. Then, you know.

Then your personality is going to have to pull a lot of weight. For sure. For sure. For sure. If he can't handle me at my bike helmet. So that would be. I don't know how far I can push this before human resources steps in but part of me would love to have a caveat

like if you go home with them you have to have your bike helmet on but you know that's just how committed to the show and the bit you are that would be even funnier what if it was like that's when you first put it on like boy this bitch gives us some crazy shit she likes it rough dude she put on a helmet first dude

so okay that could be your video this week bitch because it's some crazy shit. She likes it rough, dude. She put on a helmet first, dude. That could be your video this week. That was a weird transition. Yeah. This week is... To be clear, I was referring to the date. This week we'll be setting the stage and then next week

commences the week of Helmet setting the stage and then next week commences the week of Helmet yeah and then also the date you know okay oh I meant

no I meant the date the date this week yeah I thought you meant the video was like talking about this and then the dates next week

no and you can edit it because I feel like that's kind of nose jobby UTI issue we have better ones yeah

not UTI whatever you know what I mean IUD yeah IUD acronyms took me off I couldn't even get nose jobby UTI issue. We had better ones. Yeah. Not UTI, whatever. You know what I mean? IUD. Acronyms took me off. I couldn't get HTMH or whatever the hell that one is. Height doesn't, height doesn't measure how much of a race baiting asshole I am.

H-A-T-E measure race baiting asshole. Yeah. I think this is an interesting video. I think you can edit it well. I think a couple of videos like at the dinner table. Can you, I can't wait. Maybe an update in the bathroom. For some TikTok that other

people are making with those dumb robot voices. She went on a date in a bike helmet. And it's going to go viral. Everyone's going to be like, this chick is awesome. It's going to be the best thing that ever happened to you. And you're probably going to the whole point of her never making the mistake again is probably not even going to hit. She'll never make the mistake again

because she won't ever hit record again. That's the goal. What if I go on this date and then I forget to record? Would be magnifique. Okay, so I have to go on it this week? What? So I'm going on the date this week? I would, yeah.

I don't think we could force you to go on dates, but I think that this week would be a good time. If you want me to get a date, I can get a date. And actually, we do have a pretty top-heavy week. But wait, I would say we need to – if the punishment is like she wears it for a long time or does the date, we got to commence the bike helmet. She's going on the date. Because the date is what ends it. So it's either – yeah. So yeah, bike helmet tomorrow

We'll have a bike helmet Yeah, you gotta start the clock because that will be your motivation to get the date Or you just have to wear it for a week So you're doing Monday to Monday Or you go on a date Or no, I guess it'll be Tuesday to Tuesday Or you can go on a date And it erases it

We can get a bike helmet today I walk by a bike spot on the way home. I can show a bike by 2pm. I got a great helmet guy. Did we talk about the bread guy on this? No. You're a bread guy? I sent that to my buddies.

They fucking love it. Did you see the pictures of DJ? No. DJ Bean, if you guys don't know him, he was on a bachelor party this weekend. There's a bread guy. I got the plug. I got a bread connect.

Get you any bread you need. Bagels, rolls, hot dogs, hamburgers, Martins, this, that, Thomas's, English muffins, Entenmann's, everything you need. I mean, the dude showed out. He delivered. And as much as I'm making fun of it, it's like, yo, the ideal bachelor party to me would be like, let's sit in this house and get high and crush all that shit. Dude, those toaster cakes right there look flame. So good. Those are good.

DJ took a very funny picture, too, almost like a king on his throne. Just like, brand man. Are you not entertained? That's great. All right. So are you ready, Jack? Good? All right.

As long as you can get me a bike helmet. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait. But I'm wearing it tomorrow? Yeah. Okay. There's no hot guest coming in this week, which would have been preferable. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, tomorrow, I would guess around noon, you'll be helmeted up. Okay. What also would have been funny is a punishment to be named later. Like the day that Ryan Reynolds comes in in here you have to wear the helmet and it might not happen for two three years but you will no but we'll just go with the felony date the barstool sportsbook is the sportsbook made for stoolies and is the only place to find exclusive picks and parlays from big cat dave and the rest of the barstool barstool gang this march kick off the action with a hundred dollar sign up bonus from the Barstool gang. This March, kick off the action with a $100

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Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. Before we get into voicemails and our interview, there is some Barstool drama afoot. And it is some of the most dramatic drama, the dramatic drama, we've had in a while. I mean, when I was on the rundown, I posed the question to Dave about what is a more direct and blunt call-out. And his example was Dave when he called out Smitty. But that's like a boss doing the employee. This fight is Kelly Keegs calling out the mean girls,

saying that they're dumb and that they make the women and the company, Barstool Sports, look bad. And she let this blog fucking rip, which is what Barstool is built upon and why we're even here to this day is the drama and speak in your mind. But also the mean girls have been doing their thing and been very popular. So I think there's a whole lot of shit at play right now from male and female type different dynamics and uh how the internet works and going viral and being

successful and making your name and all of that shit so we pulled kelly in here to discuss it uh and i'm afraid of her so here it is She was looking particularly witchy today as well. Oh, she had eyes. They stare at you. It's like, she's got. Oh, I meant her garb. No, I know. Like that look and the eyes. She's like, she's going to eat you.

So Kelly. She did have like the moment where she's like, I feel like we're not on the same page. I was like, no, no, no. Yeah, we're good. We're good. We're good. We're good. We're good.

I promise. I promise. I promise. I promise. Kelly Keegs is in the building. I'm going to sit over here. We're causing trouble, boys. Causing trouble.

Yo. I don't think there's ever been a call-out blog on Barstool of that nature. I mean, there's had to have been. I don't know. I remember one time when Mo made fun of Tom Zolo. And the commenter culture loved it. Because I think Tommy Zolo said like OutKast wasn't good and Moe just like had a fucking meltdown. That was a wild take.

We were doing um we were doing the Blackout Tour and he was doing Barstool Beats and he was like how can this man like represent us talking about music when he says things like that which I guess is a similar corollary here. I don't think the guys have ever – I'm trying to think. Has there been a – Well, guys don't care enough about things. Yeah. That's the problem. Guys will be like, I care about it for five minutes and then they're like –

No, we don't. They're hands in their pants again. That's how it goes. Right. And I'm just not like that. If something strikes me the right way, then I will not let it go for a while. Yeah. That's why I am so afraid of Kelly. I always am. You know what? strikes me the right way then i will not let it go for a while yeah and i really have to drive

the point home when i feel a certain way and if you don't get it i'm going to explain it until you do have you has there been any contact for people don't know kelly put up a blog uh just saying straight up i officially hate the mean girls and the the too long didn't read is we all the other girls here at barstool have been doing our best to change the perception of girls in comedy and girls in media. And the mean girls have like just come in and done the opposite of that. Yeah. And so you said I officially hate the mean girls. So have you heard from them at all?

I've heard nothing from them. Do you guys talk on like a regular basis? No. No, not anymore. I used to be closer with Alex. And I wrote in the blog that she's a different person than she was a year ago. Like that's just, you know, good or bad, whatever that is, however she wants to take that. We were on Barstool vs. America together.

We got kind of close there. Friendly, hung out, went to a birthday party. Like, you know, whatever. And she's just, she's on an island now. I don't know what her deal is. I don't really also know what her relationship is like with Jordan anymore because they used to be attached to the hip 24-7, never leaving each other,

and now it seems like that's not the case. So I don't really know what's happening with the two of them. As people, they're fine. They're fine people. I don't mind talking to them,

hanging out with them. Okay, whatever. As the mean girls, it's a fucking nightmare, and it has to stop. And I will say this. I have listened to their to their podcast before in its entirety and the pot is not bad they have normal conversations they talk about

dating advice they talk about life experiences and whatever it's fine it's it's it's nothing like you know nothing that i'm gonna that i'm gonna shit on normally what bothers me is that while they record these shows they have these stupid fucking conversations that are just insufferable to see. And that is what is taken from their shows into clips and put on every single game account. So therein lies what I think is

the, I guess the bigger issue. The bigger discussion. Because I I've been in this for 10 years. I say dumb shit all the fucking time. I also don't really wash my fucking hands. I made the conscious decision to stop washing my hands. I think when I was in college.

Was it college for you? I don't know. That's the, that's when I remember it because one of my good friends from college also doesn't wash her hands. And it was like how we had that bonding experience. One day I was like, I'm just not going to wash them. She was like, I'm not either. I don't wash my hands. I don't really trust people that wash their hands because well one i don't think

it does anything to actually why it doesn't it doesn't do anything to actually wash them i do wash if i go number two they didn't used to wash them back in like the back way back in the day when they didn't have and you would go to the bathroom around the outhouse nobody washed their hands then and there was less diseases i sometimes like my roommates home off like turn the water on because i'm like i don't want them to think i'm like disgusting i'll like text i'll like turn the water on and like take a text break and be like when you're at work and someone that you know goes into the cell you're like well i guess i'll fake wash my hands now we're always in the bathroom with kate and i'm always like you also don't shower if that's what the whole debate is about right exactly i'll say that because it

sounds fucking gross but you don't like i'm already like a little grossed out by you all the time i wash i wash my hands i don't wash my hands when i piss i don't wash my hands i like never it's like one of the things we actually even at one point um i think we were debating asking every guest that yeah yeah yeah right right and then we asked fucking what's his dick fucking jake lacy and we were like he's before you're sorry i got around the bathroom came back Yeah, yeah, yeah, right, right. And then we asked, fucking, what's his dick? Fucking Jake Lacey. And we were like, before the interview started, he's like, I gotta run to the bathroom. Came back, and then we introduced ourselves, and we're like, did you wash your hands in the bathroom? And he was like, no.

He like paused and was just like, no. That's strange. And like, I understand. I understand that not everybody washes their hands. I get it. I understand that. We don't need reminders, and we also don't need encouragement of this, okay? Especially in an office like this, where we're all one click from typhoid fever.

Like, I don't know. Like, something. It's fucking insane. But that's not what bothers me, okay? It's not that clip. That clip was the straw that broke my back, right? All in all, all of their clips, they get millions of views. I understand.

The social team pushes them out. Whatever. They approve the clips. It goes up. They say these things. Blah, blah, blah. I can't stand the people thinking that it's real and thinking that i don't think i don't think it's wait sorry let me finish thinking that it's real and then judging the rest of us on on how they act no kevin you don't you don't think

it happens because you're not a girl all day long i hear about these fucking idiots i mean i know they're not idiots and they i need to stop acting like idiots and while i think the clips are not contrived they're not fake like they're not sitting in the need to stop acting like idiots and while I think the clips are not contrived they're not fake like they're not sitting in the lab writing it up being like

this is the joke we're gonna do today that's gonna set this place on fucking fire they say dumb shit and then they are like oh yeah that's good for the clip

and that will draw people in but it's not drawing anybody in it's just having people talk shit on you and it's not reflective of the content that you're actually putting out which isn't bad

so why are you just not putting out the clips of your stuff is it not good enough to put out or are you just trying to draw people in with this bullshit and then get all this hate like that's i mean that's a top-down problem i think you mentioned the blog like it's pretty right it's pretty regularly said like be this be this be this and alex loves it specifically i don't know how much jordan loves it i know that alex loves it she gets in with the shit she doesn't mind people talk shit to her all the

time whatever blah blah blah she'll go on about a topic for a week long like it's it's a lot okay jordan is not quite the same but at some point doesn't it weigh on you that everybody fucking hates you and everyone in this office is talking shit about you in a real way that's the problem no one is telling them that everybody thinks we're all in on the joke we're not on the joke we all think you're idiots and you're making us all look bad i'm sorry to be the one sometimes but the it i haven't seen this you like have the luxury of thinking it's funny i haven't seen the problem and i agree but that's why i think it's probably like it's a i think it's a probably a top-down issue at this company

and i think it's a top-down issue societally speaking because like it is the things we put out like if i if i i just explicitly said I don't wash my hands. No one's going to fucking care. But it is because I'm a guy versus a girl. And it's the same thing we see at this company all the time. We're like, a guy freaking out is funny. We have people here who freak out nonstop for video content. And that's funny.

Whereas if a girl freaks out, it's like, you don't have body autotune anymore. Get over it, bitch. And a guy freaks out is like, well, he had plus have body autotune anymore. Get over it, bitch. And a guy freaks out, it's like, well, he had plus three. What are you going to do? Don't even get me. I've been arguing with people online all day long before this even happened about the song The Man by Taylor Swift. People being like, that song sucks. The only people that say that song sucks are men.

That's it. I like that song. Thank you. You're different. We love to. I feel like the barstool stigma for guys has always been – like there's been plenty of guys I think who reinforce like the misogynistic stereotype of barstool. But I would always just be like, I don't know. That's their thing. No, I'm not talking about misogyny at all.

I'm talking about stupidity. I know. But that's your know that's no i'm not talking about misogyny at all i'm talking about stupidity i know but that's yeah that's the girl version like the guy version would be like like when dave would put up a blog being like i'm bringing the word cunt back yeah and i'd be like i'm all for that i love it i love saying cunt but yeah and that's what it gives me but i'm like there are times where i was like these are some of the exact things that people say about barcel and he's doing it but i don't it's just like he's doing it. But, I don't know. It's just like, he's doing it. But don't you,

and maybe this is just, maybe this is just me, which is really fucking sad, but don't you guys want people to think that we're smarter than that? Don't you want people to think that we care about what we put out

and we're not just putting things out to get views on Instagram for no fucking reason? I know. I wholeheartedly agree. I hate the Instagram reels. I don't want people to think I'm stupid. I don't want to be embarrassed to say I work for Barstool Sports because people. I wholeheartedly agree. I hate the Instagram reels, the rules,

I don't want to be embarrassed to say I work for Barstool Sports because people think I'm a fucking idiot. But that's what Kevin's saying is that like, it's something, again,

it's not the stupidity we have to deal with, but it was for a long time. It was like, everyone wears massages, everyone does this. And you're like, nah,

we're not, but like, whatever, you know, like that's, that's what they do. That's, that's their fucking bag.

I guess it's different. There's because for you guys, because you guys because there's so many guys. And so it doesn't matter. Well, that's the thing. Girls are always going to be pitted against each other or prepared. There's only a few girls here that make content and do what they need to do. And if they are the only ones getting posted on Maine every fucking day with this stupid shit, everyone's just going to think the girls at barcelona are idiots so then when i make a clip or i have a some sort of like intelligent thought

that i want to talk about a thoughtful discussion if anything it won't even see the light of day not not saying like i'm amazing post my clips i'm just saying like no one's gonna care about my shakes it's like oh this is boring who cares she's making real points uh women are stupid problem with them or more like gas and the social people it's both because they're in on it they're alex specifically alex is the mastermind behind the clips and she loves the trolling and she works with gas closely and that's what they do and that's fine for them and that's great but i'm i'm sick of it i'm tired of it it's i think it's i think it makes us all look bad like i just i feel like i'm saying that and no one people are looking at me and i know they're agreeing with me you guys are not you, I'm reading you guys both the wrong way.

I feel like you're not on my side with this. No, I'm not. I'm more, I am on your side very strongly about one thing. And then with like, with the clips and stuff like that, I do think it's like, I think it's created a-

If I thought they were faking it, I would be more on your side on that front. The, what we put on social always needing to be clickbait and like, we know this is going to drive up how many comments we get on our Instagram. All that shit drives me crazy. Right.

But like, I think that she doesn't know about dinosaurs. And I think that she said with her chest that there are less diseases. No, I know. She's probably right. By the way, less named diseases.

We got, we know we have more. I agree. There is probably some Google have more i agree there's probably some google search that says like there's 20 000 diseases back then and there's 20 billion now and i agree with all that i don't if somebody is getting popular because listen i have sat here for years trying to do i'm not saying i do like fucking artistic work but I've tried every different medium and every different style and I gotta watch another motherfucker eat something and just say what their score out of 10

is or you know do whatever that it's like sometimes that dumb shit fucking plays and we've sometimes been the benefits of that and sometimes we've done the I'm trying to say and make sure it doesn't get lost in the sauce that I'm not trying to like knock their success.

Like their success is it's happened. It's great. Their growth. We literally never stop hearing about it. So I understand that it's doing well. And I apart from the clips, I assume based on how far up their asses everybody is that the podcast does well, too. I don't know but in my head now that it's established and grown and good and people like it and people are subscribing and they're staying tuned can't we pivot past the bullshit and

actually put out some of the content that you're creating and they spend hours they reserve the recording rooms for like six hours at a time they're spending all that time doing what why is it that we can't put out what you're actually creating instead of the dumb shit you say accidentally yeah i i agree i agree with that i think i think that they are better than that and that in turn it makes us better but they are the best versions of themselves and they're just not being i also do think that's what like talking head media has become like the first take clips aren't them having like interesting real conversations about fucking it's like it's like I mean that's like it's like no Jordan's better

no LeBron it's like nothing that gets clipped is ever particularly interesting or informative and like

and I don't like that that sucks I hate the way that the world is and that's right and that's the point that's the way the world is so it's like

I can't we can't even I'm at the point where I can't just like write off oh it's just a clip whatever who cares because all people look at our clips now that's it that's all people see that's where they make their judgments and that's where Like I can't – we can't even – I'm at the point where I can't just like write off. Oh, it's just a clip. Whatever. Who cares?

Because all people look at our clips now. That's it. That's all people see. That's where they make their judgments and that's where they keep their judgments forever. And the minute you see something fucking stupid like that, you automatically assume this is what's happening and that's it. The amount of – and this is not even me bragging. The amount of people in my DMs right now – I posted this on Twitter. I'm sorry.

On Instagram. OK? The amount of people in like my other DMs about this, girls being like, thank you so much. This is fucking crazy, blah, blah. I'm talking 50 plus, and this blog's been up for an hour. And for that many people to DM me saying, yes, we're all thinking this, it's ridiculous, means it's a fucking problem.

And again, I'm not saying like, I'm not trying to start a real war with Alex and Jordan. I'm saying that Alex and Jordan are better than this, and they can start acting better than this. They're established now. They've had the podcast for over a year. They can actually put their work out there and be respected other than having this dumb shit.

I get that if I can be a guy for a second. And it's like how Brad Marchand got into the NHL where he's a pest. He was a fourth line fucking motherfucker. And he's like, no, by the way, I have great skill. Put me on the first line, I'll score 30 goals a year. And I think there's something to it to that. But the... What was I just going to say?

Fuck. We'll cut this part out. You're going to be a guy for a second. No, but that was the Marchant thing. What were we saying before that? It feels. Sorry, I went into Bruins mode there. Problem.

It feels like a little bit of like Call Her Daddy light, you know, with the idea. But I even hate that. I hate the it's call her daddy light because they're not even saying anything informative like at least call her daddy was like they put their money where their mouth is and they said cunt and blowjobs on the on clips you know what i mean like they built it on some garbage and then alex cooper turned it into barbara fucking walters okay i respect the shit out of that i even liked the call her daddy clips they were good as a woman i liked them i've always liked Call Her Daddy. I'm a Call Her Daddy girl.

And I, this is just not, and again, I don't want this to turn into like, fuck these girls, women hate women, blah, blah, blah, because that's how it comes across when a girl says it. But a guy can't say it because nobody will take it seriously. And I'm just sick of looking stupid by association. I remember what I was going to say. Why is this one? Because again, and this is probably bad hosting or whatever.

I haven't seen the clip yet. I obviously have the general gist of it. i mean it's just it's not even like the most offensive clip that's ever been put so that's what that was my question was gonna be why was this one the one that because i was for weeks and weeks it's gotten progressively worse but this was like was it like this was everybody today decided they're out was it because you said something first and everyone or whoever said something we all started saying shit at the same time the whole clip is them going back and forth being like, I don't wash my hands. Oh my God, me neither.

I bonded with my friend over it. And then literally Alex was like, I don't wash my hands because there's literally no point to wash your hands. It does nothing. There are less diseases now than there were back in the day because people never wash their hands in outhouses. And so I think it's really pointless to do it to the point where even today I was like, this has to be scripted.

This is so fucking stupid. But it's just not. I know that it's not and i know that they're smarter than this or they can at least attempt to be smarter than this i'm not a smart person but i feel like the dinosaur clip is dumber like i couldn't get started about the dinosaur clip it's like how many times can i scream god is not real into the fucking universe like i can't keep saying that and you guys took care of it everybody that's another thing too is like that one i would have loved to go off on that one but i'm so sick of giving this stupidity attention and that is the problem and now it's like all right fine i i held my tongue held my tongue held my tongue for months and months on this stupid shit and now it just all came out today and i'm pissed and it's ridiculous

and i feel like i don't know these bitches anymore and we're stuck with them when everybody moves to chicago we're stuck with them we have to work with Chicago, we're stuck with them. We have to work with them. We have to get along with them. If they want to be on the wrong island of stupidity. That part's probably out. Well, whatever. I'm sorry. It's like if you don't want to hear what's real, then don't fucking, you know, I don't know.

Then don't look onto the internet. That's part of, you know, Barstool has always been like you can speak your mind and say what you want. What do you think their reaction is going to be? I think that Alex will be like, LOL, so funny. We love the hate keeps us

motivated and i think jordan will pretend to agree and actually not agree i think i think it will hurt jordan's feelings and that's not my intention it is to embarrass them it's not to hurt their feelings would you engage in a uh like a little uh little therapy session like a therapy session i don't think it would be a therapy session i A therapy session. I don't think it would be a therapy session. I think that it would be, right. It would be a conversation.

I don't know if they would want that. What I want to do, you bring up the New York office, like, part of, part of what makes Barstool and the internet interesting is shit like this, the confrontation

and that kind of stuff. But then it becomes like, you choose sides and then the office becomes tense and things become you know fighting and all that and i don't even know if it's possible to do this or not but i would rather it be a place where that shit is not really like the no i agree with that and i feel like if you know people better you don't you know like if if if it was us or the guy girl

thing is different but if you had a friend who was saying something stupid, you'd be like, I don't know. They're just being dumb. Like whatever. No, Kevin. That's where you're wrong. If you have a friend that's doing dumb shit like that for this amount of time, you have to have friends that tell you when you're being fucking stupid. That is my point here. Right.

Is that it's gone too far. It's working for who? It's working for clips on Instagram? Is that worth it to jeopardize your entire career and your integrity i mean they have a podcast because of this you know what i mean like no no their podcast started very different than this their podcast was not this in the beginning yeah maybe not like the only they started getting all the like all the crazy internet like at some point it sucks but it's also like this is what the internet responds because they were they outside of work hours were talking shit about another employee that's why they had

this podcast so if another employee inside if Mean Girls are getting Mean Girled then I'm sorry no no no it wasn't about an employee though

was it? wasn't it about like Dave Friend? Kate Walker oh that was yeah yeah yeah and then it was perpetuated by

Alex Fletcher about Daniel Bernstein yeah yeah that was when they were actually being Mean Girls I mean yeah that whole thing

that whole thing is separate that's fine they turned it into a brand they crush it like I said they crush it with like merch they try really hard they care about the brand that's fine they turned it into a brand they crush it like I said they crush it with like merch

they try really hard they care about the brand that's fine but for them to care about it so much and then to let this be their image is what blows my mind

and it's just it's just gone on for too long like they are better than this and I think that we should all be better than this if they're just like we don't care we're fine with this

what then? well then I'll be like alright you're fucking idiots and you're going to hear from me every day I just don't I have no power what did Zach willison say i'm gonna make that guy's life hell right like i don't i'm not bothered by it and i also i think that you're worried that now there's like animosity forever i don't like i will stop caring about this tomorrow you know

what i mean like this isn't this isn't a big deal for me there will be animosity forever that's fine if they have i'm just saying like we know maybe you but i'm just saying the way the world works they're not they no but i don't care about that either i'm just saying i don't think that they would i don't think that they will have animosity and i don't think that they'll talk shit about me either because they look stupid here like they're not in the right here i'm not the one who's just like being a bitch for no reason i'm the one who's just saying what everybody is thinking right and so if they don't i do that i think that they come out of this there's a huge chunk that does agree with you yeah the majority agrees with me heaven well i don't – I think that they should come out of this. So there's a huge chunk that does agree with you, yeah.

The majority agrees with me, Kevin. Well, I don't know. I'm just telling you. The problem or the thing that I think they need to come out of the gate with is like acknowledge that their shit is stupid and like revamp it. Be like, all right, we're hanging up our stupidity hats and we're going to like make some real shit now. And we're going to show you the real us and we're going to all move through this together. And I would love and respect that because that's exactly who they are and who they were before they started just like, you know, resting on their laurels with these fucking clips.

Like that's how it feels. And I get totally what you're saying about stupidity and dumb stuff. It just hits close to home. And I get that. I think that's why I'm like, well, but yeah, that's what we do too, is just dumb shit.

And I get, again, we're having a much larger- You do we're having a much larger but you also have have like moments of intelligence like i guess like we laugh like i again i again i'm gonna say one more time i haven't seen the clip so i don't know like because i would say that i go that's fucking stupid and i would like laugh and like acknowledge i said something dumb um i don't know if they do that i guess that's the difference and also there is obviously as we all know a larger difference is how the world looks at guys talking about dumb shit versus girls talking about dumb shit. Where it's just like, ah, they're being goofy. And no one's ever like, I don't think at least, no one's ever come to me in the street and been like, you're a fucking moron. I think girls will be like, thank you, because we do get girls aren't funny.

Girls are stupid. And when you reinforce that. I'm sick of swimming against the tide forever like that's just that's always how it feels and there's definitely a shit ton of girls who feel that way for sure yeah um yeah i don't know we'll see what happens but again i'm not i'm not worried about having a conversation with them if you're your thing of like sitting down having a therapy session i would gladly do that any day they're not going to want to hear what i have to say and I don't know what their responses would be to my points. I don't know if you can argue like most people think that you sound like idiots.

And if they're like, yeah, well, we like being idiots. It's like, all right, well, then you're a lost cause. Like I don't know what to tell you. That's embarrassing. I think I would be like – We just don't vibe that. I don't know if I would be like I don't want to be – like I am an idiot. I think I would just be like this is what my this

is my job is what works for me and that's fine if that's your job that's what works for you then i just gave them all the promotion they could get you know what i mean like but it's also like i also get being like i'm gonna say it if you don't change anything if nothing happens like fine but i gotta get no i gotta get these thoughts off i gotta get i also think i also think we can never we can never have like a sit-down conversation on camera or whatever because I think that they like to control what – besides those clips and also why I think those clips are so much – like they are just as guilty as the social team is that they are so controlling of what they put out. Like for example the Francis thing. Like Francis went on with them and it was like too logical. Like he just says too many things that make sense

for them to like argue with in a stupid way, which is fine. And again, if your whole thing is I'm just going to argue and sound stupid and whatever, that's cool,

but they're not going to like talking to me either because that's just not my bag. I don't do that. It is. I completely get it. I think people, the thing is like with this,

like I get what everyone's doing. I don't have an issue. The social team's doing what's best for the social team. I mean, Gaz the thing is with this, I get what everyone is doing. I don't have an issue. The social team is doing what's best for the social team. I mean Gaz and those guys are like – Gaz is coming everywhere. That's what I'm saying. That's why I wrote the blog today or whatever and I was like I'm not even going to get in trouble because I know that – He's literal.

So like I mean really what we're like doing is like everyone's kind of just doing their job right right like so it's like hard to get mad at anybody like i get i roll and be like that clip's dumb or i get being frustrated like again like kevin said no one's putting out genius stuff here but there's there are times when you're like the fucking guy's chewing on his chew toy again that will get some main post clip i mean don't i don't get me going on that. Listen, I was traumatized. We can't even talk about that. I was fucking traumatized last week and I can't even discuss it. Yeah, that's – you want to talk about larger discussions.

Holy fuck. I mean, yeah, there are a lot of things we can talk about, but this seems like a small hurdle to tackle and I felt comfortable doing so. And again, it's not that I wrote this blog. I'm saying all this stuff. This is nothing that I wouldn't say to their faces. I thought they were coming in today. I was going to have a full-blown conversation about it. I was tweeting talking shit shit i don't usually do

that with them because again i never want to like bring attention to the stupidity but um if this is the game they're playing it's the game they're playing and but it's like it's the game that like has been played since like i i don't know i can't i can't i don't think i was even alive or at least sentient to know what year like the media shifted like that but it was a long time ago do you agree though that there are different kinds of clickbait? You can still do clickbait. Just don't do it in the way that makes everybody look bad. Yeah.

Don't you feel fucking lame? I said this on The Act just now. They had me come in for a second. I was like, don't you guys just feel fucking lame that this is on the main all the time? And then everybody comments and everybody sends it to you and whatever. I'm sorry. I started feeling lame long before The Mean Girls.

I mean, well, that's fair. That's i just i just thought i think because i'm a girl i think it's more so i mean i definitely think the female for sure i i tend to also think though like i'll be like in the long run you'll be good like yeah i'm not worried about it yeah but i'm saying like shit like that does run its course and If they can't pivot, it probably won't last forever. Like Call Her Daddy needed to become Barbara Walters. You can't just talk about sucking dick every single day. That's what I'm saying. This is their chance to become Barbara Walters.

I would love to see it. I would love that. When someone else is lame at Barstool, I think I'm more like, all right, let that work. Like I'll go over here and do good shit and hopefully the people who want good shit will come to me. I don't know. Not like it represents all of us. But that's where the girl thing becomes different because you guys get all lumped together. We get all lumped together.

I'm also just sick of, like, sucking their dick so hard. Like, I'm sick of being like, well, mean girls, clips are so great. And I think that's – No, they're not. Like, duh. Yes, but people hate it. That's why. I think that's why people at Barstool have such animosity towards it.

It's not even because their clips do well. It's because it's talked about. And I actually think we're talking about it so much now that it's going – people are going to envision it to be talked about way more. It's going to be great. None of this is bad for them. It's not bad for business. It's just I'm speaking my mind. They'll come back however they want to come back.

That's fine. I don't care. They can talk shit about me all day long. I just know that I'm not as stupid as they are. So that's all that really matters. Yeah yeah i mean the clips are gonna keep on rolling these clips those clips it's the clip that's also too it's like if we have to hear about their bullshit for a full week then i'm gonna get in the mix then then i'm gonna start talking shit i had to hear about those motherfucking dinosaurs i swear to god if i saw one more clip i was gonna

explode and then this was served to me on a silver platter at 10 a.m. on a Monday morning. So there we are. All right, Kelly Keeks, folks. Thanks for having me. Buckle up. Thank you very much. I do think that this – there's two sides to this. It's a little bit like logic versus emotion.

And I think that logically it's like everybody do your thing and make your views and make your money. And that's just how this game goes. And the other side is the emotional side where I understand being pissed off that just dumb shit is getting all the attention. Dave did say, too, though, because I was listening to the rundown yesterday. That's another thing. World Baseball Classic and this debate. Go listen to the rundown with me, Dan, and Dave.

I did agree with what Dave said because there have been, not even people at Barstool, people I see on the internet. I'm like, well, anyone can fucking do that. And it is a certain person. Then do it. But we've said, I don't wash my hands. No one cares when we say it. That's a guy-girl thing, whatever, as we talked about. But there are even a girl saying it.

Not just any girl. I mean, Brianna and Grace said it, and it didn't really pop off. These girls say it. And I kind of made fun of the Franks and stuff like that a little bit. And people freak out on the internet all the time. And people don't care. There are certain people who Frank gets reactions. It has to do with your look, how you're doing it.

Absolutely. Your age, your look, your gender, your It has to do with your look, how you're doing it. Everything plays a factor. Your gender, your past body of work, your status, all that shit. That's why I think ultimately all of this shit on the internet always boils down to the social network shit. If you built Facebook, if you invented Facebook, you would be the inventor of Facebook. It's like if it's working, it's working. You don't like that it's going viral because girls are being dumb. I don't know, man. That's what the internet wants's like if it's working it's working like you don't like that it's going viral because girls are being dumb i don't know man that's what the internet wants to argue about

maybe it's not what they like when you when you make great content it's like that's what the internet wants to see that's obviously the pinnacle but if it's like i don't know man when i talk to my friends i end up saying dumb silly shit i also i'm not it's not that i'm anti i'm not on i'm not not on kelly's side i just would feel like a hypocritical asshole if all of a sudden after literally 10 years of talking about like, do you want ducks to fly out of your ass or worms to come out of your ears? If all of a sudden I'd be like, yeah, we need to have a higher bar. Our bar has been on the floor. We can't do much talking.

Why did I do that? What? Why did I do that? I don't know, but I like it. We can't do much talking. Why did I do that? What? Why did I do that? I don't know, but I liked it. Can't do much talking. All right, voicemails with this moron. Let's go. Attention all partiers, drinkers, and ragers.

We've got to drink for you. It's St. Patrick's Day month, so we got pirate water. That means after that, we've got the baseball season and spring and then summer's here and then you're on the beach. Sundress season. Party season. Warm weather. Outdoor rooftop season. That's where pirate water's really

going to thrive. And pirate water is I mean, think about it. You're a pirate. It's a warm weather thing. This weekend we couldn't give out pirate water off the float because KMID people and stuff like that. People were begging. Dude, I love it. People had it.

Like, give me another one. People were, dude, we were in the fucking staging area. People were, like, hanging out with the fans being like, let me get a pirate water. I was like, as I mentioned earlier, there's 10,000 cops behind me. I cannot give it. There's 13. Look, what the hell, man? You got braces.

I can't give you a fucking pirate water. It's also, it's perfect. It's everywhere now. You can get it. It's not like our other drink launches where there's no available product, but also just scarce enough that people are like, I haven't had it yet. I got to try it. So you can find it at your local liquor stores or gas stations or sometimes in, I think some

of the bars are having it. You can brown bag it. I had distributors come up to me at bars being like, can we redistribute it? And I was like, I don't know. Talk to somebody. You tell me. I don't know.

You're the distributor. Talk to Pirate Water. But yeah, that would be great. Distribute it. It comes in four flavors. Margarita, Sex on the Beach, Bahama Mama, and Miami Vice. It's 10% alcohol by volume. It's also 16 ounces.

I actually had an adult buddy of mine text me this weekend and be like this is all i drink now wow yeah so because some people like oh this is just for the kids it's like listen it's for the brown bagging pre-gaming let's get fucked up uh you know let's party crew but if adults can drink it too when it's like on ice when it's real cold it's like having a uh like a beach drink it's like a you're on vacation you're on vacation, you're on a cruise, you're on the water, you're on a boat, whatever. So you can go to all your local places or go to drinkpiratewater.com to find a location near you

or order it now off GoPuff. It's drinkpiratewater.com. What up, gang? We're going to circle back to the dog talk that we were talking about the other day. My dog, see, he goes out to work with me every day. He's a cattle dog, so he helps me out. Bless you.

If he was able to talk, he'd be able to slip to my boss on accident that his dumbass owner stayed out till 1 in the morning on a Wednesday night at the Legion drinking dollar beers. So I don't need my loyal companion doing that. So I'm going to keep my dog not talking. Fair play, but I think there's an important word he said in there. You're a loyal companion. Yeah, like dogs are loyal.

They would never. He wouldn't snitch. Like if you've got a dog that snitches, you've got a cat. That's if you don't have two quarterbacks. You don't have two quarterbacks. You don't have a war. You've got a dog that snitches, you've got a cat, bro. If you have a dog that would rat on you, you are a bad owner.

That's a red flag. That's some CPS shit. Get me out of here. Dude, why does he get abused when he would rat on their husband? Yeah, exactly. That's what I mean. Here's how I have a couple beers over at the Legion, brother. If your dog snitches that you were having dollar beers at the American Legion, that ain't a dog at all.

Yeah, that is. I mean, we're on the same page. There's not a ton to talk about. I would prefer my dogs don't talk. But if my dogs could talk, she'd be like, you got a comfy ass, warm ass lap. Yeah, I would hope. I mean, that's the whole reason why I don't want to open up Pandora's box. I don't want to.

What if it turns out? She'd also say, again, this is if she was a snitch. If you injected her with the true serum, she would say, for a long time, he lies to his parents about taking me out. No, I have not been on a walk. When they go to bed and they say, take her out before you go to bed, and he says, sure thing, he almost never does. And when they say, no, I'll open the door and I'll let her go out. But when they say, take her on a walk before bed, they'll go, he opens the door to the backyard and he stands at the threshold and he watches me pee and he goes, Maddie, come

here. Come back in. Come back in. It's fucking cold now. Dude, you can love dogs, but you got to admit, taking your dog out for a walk fucking blows. In the beginning, you got a puppy. It's hard, but you're excited. And then the beginning at a puppy it's hard but you're excited when and then when you're old it's like you almost want to take care of them and like

their last days and years but those middle years are just like you can't shit on your own like like i the litter box thing with cats is not you know not great but god damn is that nice that you could your pet is just set it and forget it if i could have like a bigger cat like a cat dog size cat that's not so like catty yeah yeah like if i just have like a almost like a little lion like a thick girl yeah like a puerto rican cat shout out marcus the uh it is um funny to this is to go back to to Boston this weekend. I was out with my buddies. And I remember thinking back to when one of my buddies first got a dog. And he'd be like, I got to go home.

I got to take the dog home. They're so stupid, dude. You're a fucking idiot for getting a dog. Why did you do that? You're fucking ruining the day. Blah, blah, blah. Saturday night, like 7 p.m. Buddy had been out with us for four hours. He's like, I got to head out.

I got to take Mikey Jr. out. And I was like, goddamn right you do, bro. Let's go home. Yep. It's the best. It is the best excuse, whether it's real or not. You know what I mean? I can be like, you know, if Duncan doesn't get let out, he's going to tear the place

apart. Duncan's going to just sleep another few hours. He might pee on the floor. Not that big of a deal. But I got to go, man. I got to go. There was one time we were going to someone's apartment, and Chrissy was like, should we bring the dog with? I was like, no, because then how are we getting out of there?

Yes, yes. Perfect. Next up. Hey, hey, hey. What up, crew? I noticed something that happened today that happens more often than it really should. I'm going into work to take a week, and I go to grab my junk, you know, with two fingers.

And I'm like, what the fuck is this? Oh. So I reach down, and there's a hair inside of, like of like you know the little bit of skin that's there and it's like i'm fucking unraveling this thing i'm like jesus christ is this my fucking hair god damn it how does this fucking happen like what happens in the shower where like you know this runs down i mean i mean you can't see it right now. Uh, I've got hot bitch hair. I primmed it. Um, and, uh, Oh, hi, I'm back. And, um, yeah, Jackie, feel free to use that one hot bitch hair. Um, you can run that one into the ground. Um, and just think like, has anything like this ever happened to you? Like where you found hair in some weird place? Like, I don't know, your ass crack or something or like

and it's like not hair that's supposed to be there. In his dick? He might be as foreskin. Maybe my boys on snip. The hair in your asshole is a is a universal thing, no?

Oh, I was going to say. Yeah. You never had like a i i remember that city uh that show broad city yeah they once had uh like a segue into a like a cold open basically where she's like so then i kept pulling and i realized it was my own hair and my butt and that was it they never talked about it you've never had um like it's it's i don't know it's either in the back or the front And you

Like you You pull it And then you feel like A tug on your asshole And it's like a long Piece of hair It's usually a girl's hair I don't know

And somehow it ends up In your asshole And you can feel it Like you're like Whoop It's like That's like On my asshole

I don't know how it gets It's almost in there It's crazy I don't think that I have Well you don't have Until it gets... It's almost in there. It's crazy. I don't think that I have. Well, you don't have... Until the part where you said, like, you feel it. I was like, maybe...

You guys know exactly what I'm talking about, right? Yeah, okay, good. Because I would have been... I was very... That was about to be a big moment where I was about to... And it just goes... It's so weird.

Feels like pulling off a screen protector. Does that happen to girls? Wait, say that one more time. It's like, I'm trying to remember exactly when it is. So it's probably like I'm getting in the shower, maybe even after the shower. And I'm trying to think of why you like all of a sudden are pulling on a hair or whatever. But like, I don't know. Oh, yeah.

You get hair in your butt? Like with like long hair yeah yeah you have to pull yeah yeah out of your butt yeah

yeah like in your crack it's not like in your yeah well that's kind of what Kevin said well I mean a little bit you feel it like

on your asshole like it's in the crack and it's not like it's not like it's up you know when you talk about the doors like yeah

first it's in the it's in the mudroom I don't I could imagine I would imagine It's not like it's up. Can you talk about the doors? Yeah. First, it's in the mudroom. It's in the mudroom. I don't... I would imagine for chicks that happens a lot with your pussy, too. Where it's just like stuck in between the little, you know, the door like this. You know? I don't think I... I'm so sad.

I'm so sad you haven't. I'm not going to say 100% no because I don't really remember. I want your commentary on it because you're so good at shit like this like it's it's one of those things i've actually relatively recently thought about trying to make this a bit the only time i've ever heard it mentioned publicly was that episode of broad city and when they did it it was so well done because they they just came back from commercial and she said it and then they changed conversation and i was like it is a thing it is a thing because i was like what do i have a girlfriend's hair yeah i mean it sucks that you don't have it i can't again i'm not gonna say a hundred percent every time but it definitely doesn't happen frequently enough where i know

what you're talking about yeah no i mean i i would say it's like have you ever pulled like your girlfriend or long hair out of your own ass and i bet you a lot of people would say yes really yeah god i'm gonna come home i've fucking cut my hair off and fucking show come tomorrow with a fucking tail i think it's like i think your body i think like you know the hair i don't know just falls down or whatever falls on your back and then your cheeks maybe clench it or something again i don't know why it's usually long hair so I don't know why my girls hair would be on mine but throughout the years

I'm always like pretty sure mine's from like laundry it's like doing doing her laundry to be clear I have found hairs where I'm like when was the last time

like yeah like well I haven't been with a long girl yeah where the fuck did that come from I've had that

and boxers are more often like wrapped around my dick I'm like when the fuck was the last time a girl's head was down here? That could for sure happen too.

That feels good. I know what you're talking about. I've had it wrapped around my balls. You're like, what? Well, you know, it's not that much further of a bridge then. No, I'm just saying I haven't felt the sensation. I've had two for one, I'll be honest. Yeah, I think that's almost kind of what it is if I'm manscaping

you know you're like trimming something or you feel something and you pull it and you're like wait a minute that's not like you think it's like a short little pew or whatever you realize it's longer and you kind of pull and it's like it's like a magician pulling out the phone yeah yeah that too

but it almost makes you feel like hair has like a toy story thing going on where like it's alive and it like runs up like it's like a little snake slithering up your leg i'm going right in his ass i will say that with with my hair now as long as it is i have crossed over into where i now clog the drain. And that's not fun. Your hair? Yeah. Coming out? Yeah. It's too long.

Yeah, it's like chicken. Okay. I'll have that little fucking hair wrap. Do you put it on the wall like those savages? It's only ever happened once. That's such a weird thing that chicks do that they just do. It's like, you're disgusting. It was enough.

It is disgusting. And mine, it's like you're disgusting it was it was enough it is disgusting and mine it only happened once but it was uh like last wednesday and um clean who were coming that day so i kind of just like with my toes like fished out of the drain and yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah clean up let me see stray hair, long stray hair in your butt. We, uh. Oh, you're going to get some weird ingrown shit. What do you think? We've discussed my hair on the show recently, what I was going to do with it.

And Pavs was saying yesterday that I can't cut my hair. I agree with that. You agree with that? Yeah. And I think his logic behind it makes sense. We could. I agree with that. You agree with that? Yeah, and I think his logic behind it makes sense. We could do a lot with that. We could really make you look like a bunch of different things. I disagree with that.

And I really don't care. You're talking about for purposes of AdWord? Yes. By the way, fucking smash hit. We have not recapped it. It's the most positively received Barstool video I think I've ever seen in my life. Not an ounce. Owen came up to me today and said thanks for filtering out because I was firing off to their group chat,

like all these screenshots of YouTube comments and tweets and all this feedback. I was like, this was fucking amazing. And he was like, thanks for filtering out the good ones. And I was like, I didn't filter. I was just scrolling and scrolling and scrolling and screen recording, and they were all good, which is insane for a Barstool video. It's very crazy. What should I do with my hair? So you think they want it to be – you can put it in a ponytail. You can put it this way.

You can put it that way. And you think it's less versatile? It's definitely more versatile. I'll have more hair to work with. See, I disagree because I think that like most male characters just have straight hair. Yeah. Like we're doing one this weekend where I'm going to be drastically different. Yeah. And like we're going to have to hire a makeup artist to like cover my hair.

Yeah. It's almost like you can wear wigs and shit like that, but you can't undo your hair. And if you want to just be like, I'm a guy in a cubicle at work, you can't have this like... I do get that. Why don't you just play it by ear? This weekend,

it would really make a difference if you had short hair? I think it could be difficult to fix this this weekend. We could put a hat over it. Even that, though. You put a hat on right now, you look like a hockey bro sort of thing. If you're trying to play a dad or a boss or something, it would be like...

I was going to cut it this week exactly for that purpose and Pavs told me... Do you have in mind already don't cut it because we're going to do this, we're going to do this, we're going to do this? I think the kill your dad character, I don't think it's funny without the hair. It's so true.

That's so true. The hair is so – that is very important. And that's a character I – Can you, like, put a bald cap on and, like, do, like, a short wig? I was thinking for what we're doing this weekend, there's a specific cap that can go over your head with a bald cap that I think we can make look fine. Okay. I wouldn't cut it just yet. I would see if there's a workaround.

I do get what you're saying. I see both sides. That's interesting. It's like, you know, you it's it's too much right like even when we're doing like the gay sketch the the adopted adoption the second time around i was like i guess i'll put in a ponytail and that that one it would use the first cut but the um i didn't know what to do with it yeah like you're like i gotta have a gay hair. Right, yeah. It's an interesting... These are the trials and tribulations of a sketch actor.

It's so fucking good, man. That was so fucking funny. I think I would... And I hope, and this is obviously... Trying to see the future. I think that will be our worst episode. A thousand percent. Wow.

If that's the case, then you motherfuckers are... You're going to Hollywood. Shit. I couldn't agree more. I can think of like ten right now that I think are better than all four of those.

I agree. I made a video for the World Baseball Classic the other day that... At the very end, where is it? At the very end, I was like, people on Twitter,

free KSC! Out of order. Out of the mall, you little business! And then I put you in the end of it. That was so fucking good. It's so funny. That's a phrase I've used before, but now it's forever your phrase. There's so many good quotable moments. You know what the actual, true,

I really believe this funniest moment of that whole thing is because it is, I don't think it's really acting. It's so real. It was when you said, then why is she dressed like it? That is so, yeah. But you could tell, like, there there's there's uh scripted like yeah that was scripted and then it's like oh you delivered that really well but i still know it's scripted and then there was like you improv that you brought her dad here he's i'm not her father like well then why are you the way you like are disgusting when you look like you're

smirking a little bit it is so fucking funny why are you dressed like it I fucking love that moment do you know what I'm talking about no you probably haven't watched it hang on you gotta watch it just a 5 second clip you have to it is that fucking funny because I would challenge you to try to capture it again

but I don't know if you'll ever be able to because it was just that that funny it was just that funny. I remember in the moment being like, well, why did he say that? We never once have we brought up the dad thing at all. 150,000 views, by the way. Sam, the boy with a penis. I'm not here to fuck a girl.

That's fucking perverted. You guys are the weirdest. You brought a camera. You brought our dad. You brought this whole thing. I'm not her dad. I'm not her dad. Then why are you dressed like it?

I'm so real. If you were in that moment, that's exactly how you would deliver that line. Why are you dressed like it? You fucking loser. That was so goddamn good. The smile. I knew when you did Making a Murderer, Making a Gambler, that you could act a little bit. I think you are an actor.

I think you're an actor. Have you ever done a play, school play or any of that shit? I think you're an actor. I was always jealous I didn't. I think you should do scripted acting. I think you could do it. I think you'd be in like a real movie eventually you start with these kind of things but like i think i think you can deliver scripted and improv shit very genuinely like i used to think i could kind of do it but like you can do it you

should do it you should go to hollywood you should like move to la we were like planning out like the season and we were like well we'll go'll go this long until John inevitably gets an acting role. I'm telling you, that is going to happen. More people like Mark will start. You get a role in this and a role in that, an extra here and there, and then next thing you know, you'll be on Criminal Minds. Imagine one day if you... Imagine that story.

One day you ended up on one of your shows. Playing a transgender who... I've transitioned to a woman, but, I've transitioned to a woman, but I'm a woman playing a guy. That's the kind of character they're going to need on Criminal Minds by next season.

They are using them pretty quickly. Wait, sorry, real quick. Just to close the loop, as they say, or whatever, on Reddit, long hair plus shower equals hair and butt crack solution. Has anyone found a solution to the hair and the butt crack situation that happened in the shower?

Had short hair for years, grew it out. It's also getting thicker, and for some reason lately, those two things combined have caused some majorly annoying issues. I'm finding handfuls of hair in my butt crack, and today it even got tangled in my vag. This girl is fucking savage. She takes dumps. Am I just weird? This happens to anyone else.

Solutions. I tried brushing before the shower. I'm just very tired of having a nest in my butt crack. Top comment. My girlfriend's hair is constantly getting tangled around my penis and balls, too. It's just like, yep, this is how it goes. So yeah, it's a thing, bro. It's a thing? It's a thing.

I hope one day I get to be part of the club. All right, last voicemail. Hilarious. Can't wait for more of that. So well done on that. I also just listened to your interview with Chris DiStefano recently. And he mentioned his dad loving Applebee's, so he used to go all the time. I specifically couldn't go to Applebee's because my dad thought that the tables were too sticky.

They are. So we never went to fucking Applebee's as a kid. I also couldn't watch George Lopez because my dad hated him. It wasn't a race thing, but saying that out loud sounds funny um but my question is what uh what were some things that you guys couldn't do as kids specifically because your parents had weird vendettas against great questions personal odd hatred for something because the thing is you don't even realize they're like it's a good thing until like later in life.

Wait a minute. I could have been doing that all these years and we just like didn't because of you? Fuck that. By the way, your dad hates George Lopez because he's Mexican. That's a fact. I mean we kind of ran the – not really run the house, but I don't really think there was – As far as those two examples go like like um my parents don't eat chinese food really i didn't eat chinese food until like much later

in life and i was like this shit is bomb really we had chinese food like every sunday say that like they joke like dad's cooking dinner and i get chinese food we had fried rice a lot like my mom would even make fried rice but as far as like dumplings and General Tso's chicken and that kind of stuff like the monkey meat type of shit really like never had it

until like maybe like no like no I remember actually there was a like middle school high school like crazy

I think the no Chinese food plus the monkey meat is kind of getting the George Lopez treatment. Fair point. There's nothing. We never went to an Olive Garden. They just hated Italians.

That wasn't anything weird. I've still never been to an Olive Garden. I don't think I have either. That's why, because my parents hate Italians. Who doesn't? Except for Italians. Who doesn't? Except for Italians. Who doesn't hate Italians? They're the goddamn worst.

The Italians hate Olive Garden, too. That's the one thing we hate. Well, right. There we get you. How about Joe Biden's St. Patrick's Day jokes? That was great. Fucking fire. Great jokes. I'm an Irishman, but I don't drink, and my family's not in prison, so it doesn't really

count. I'm not really Irish. Fuck yeah. Anybody else, that would be up in arms. Dante would have a whole blog about it let's just add the italian rhetoric no if it was italians you would um the words the italians used to have the italians and irish were the last stand we could you could make fun of us and we were okay and in recent years the italians pussied out too oh the italians are the worst of the bunch now i brought this up with my with my family and it went like like wildfire

I was like yeah listen we know what we are we drink and we get incarcerated and then someone else in my family was like if I point out an Irishman I'll point you to a drunk abuser and then my dad was like we're priests who fuck kids I don't know what you want me to tell you

this is spiraling out of control this is going on out of control Hold the phone But the Yeah the Italians Dante That's all he fucking tweets about Wah Chicago bear

Wah Shut up I'm Italian People make fun of Italians Shut up you fucking Italian Shut up you The The

Dumb wop I actually love Dante Because He He is two sides of a coin where he is both a hip. A Patriots fan and a Bears fan. He's a hip DJ. He's a cool guy.

Yeah. But he's also a dad. He's also a Facebook forwarding dad. He's unbelievable. Yeah. It really is funny. He'll be in a club with rappers and the next day we'll be talking about tax reform in Chicago. Did you see his fucking, he had a tweet on St.rick's day it was the most i saw this like uh i want to read the sign exactly

uh it was the most like dad shit ever like this is great this is classic stuff it was here it is so uh the tweet is for all my and if you by the way this is about italians he'd be up in arms uh for all my irish friends today one of the funniest signs I've ever seen. Is this true? It's a sign that says God created liquor to keep the Irish from conquering the world. Everyone's seen that sign a million times. A billion times. It's another one.

It's hilarious. Work is the plight of the drinking class. Dante's like alcohol this is great I can see Dante like at the bar in tears like you guys seen this fucking sign

they bought it at HomeGoods this is this is unbelievable this is from from conquer the world he says you get it

cause they're Irish and they're drunk and otherwise they'd be great you're too drunk to believe this unbelievable stuff excuse me bartender I'll do another one wow and they're drunk and otherwise they'd be great. You're too drunk to please this unbelievable stuff.

Excuse me, bartender, I'll do another one. Wow, who wrote that? Which fucking, I want to shake that man's hand. What genius

came up with this? Did you ever see The Family Guy? I've never seen it. No, I've never seen it before. The Family Guy cut away where it's like Ireland,ireland if like jameson was never

invented and it's like the jetsons yeah it's the same idea brilliant brilliant stuff guys all right uh let's get into our interview we got drew lynch on the show very funny comedian i gotta be honest you know i think it's a little bit of false advertising. Like he was kind of pitched as the stuttering comedian. You'll hear it. He doesn't stutter enough. He's conquered it. Yeah. It's like that's off your resume now, bro.

You're just a comedian now. It's Drew Lynch on KFC Radio. Let's talk to him. Yeah, they asked us. They told us to clean it up this week. I was like, just burn it. It's not going to happen. It's like when you leave an apartment.

You're like, I'm not getting my deposit back. I'm about to move again for like the 12th time in 15 years. I'm just throwing everything out again. I'm just starting fresh again. They know exactly what they're doing. I moved out of an apartment a few years ago. And when we left, we were trying to break down a closet-type deal, and we couldn't break it. So we were like, let's just throw it on the ground.

And we're idiots, obviously, so we didn't measure the width of the room, and it just went through a window. I didn't know that story. And we were like, you don't think I knew it? No. Dude, it was Lou, obviously. That's hilarious. And so Lou just starts backing out of the room, and he closes the door and goes, we were like, yeah, you don't think I knew it? Dude, it was Lou, obviously. And so Lou just starts backing out of the room. And he closes the door and goes, we were never in here.

And then we get an email from the landlord being like, well, you guys left a shattered window. So I'm going to knock you, for a New York landlord, an exceptionally reasonable number. So I'm knocking you $200 on the security deposit. Wait, you still got some of your security? That's insane. an exceptionally reasonable number. So I'm not going to need $200 on the security deposit. And obviously, Luke. Wait, you still got some of your security deposit? That's insane. 90% of it back. And I was like, in my head, I was like, golden, perfect.

And I went to sleep being like, I'm getting most of the security deposit back. And I woke up to a string of angry emails from Luke being like, I don't know what you're talking about. That window was intact when we left. And the security guy, the landlord just wrote back, all the glass was outside the window. Someone

pulled the window. He's like, it was all in the fire escape, you fucking idiot. That is great. That's it. I mean, New York City security deposits are just a donation. Yes, 100%. It's just what, I mean, I remember being like fresh out of college and it was like first month, last month, security, broker's fee.

And that whole thing where you need to make 40 times the rent. I remember being like, I'm not a millionaire. How am I going to make 40 times 3, i'm not a millionaire how am i gonna make 40 times 3 000 or whatever the fuck it is you have to go on craigslist and kill somebody in order to have the down payment to get an apartment for real no one's ever got enough where are you i'm from indiana originally don't tell jordan uh she loves she loves this stuff i was like you're not you're lying to me right now there's no way yeah it's crazy well i'm actually you you're lying to me right now. There's no way. She loves it. It's crazy. So you're from there, but you don't love it? No, I don't dislike it. It makes it feel like it's dislike in comparison to how much Jordan loves it.

Well, so we have Jordan. We've got another guy, Vibs. We had Pat McAfee for a while. And, I mean, they will tell you. Indiana. Indianapolis. Indiana is like paradise. It's like some secret Wakanda tell you. Indiana. Yeah, Indianapolis. Indiana is like paradise. It's like some secret Wakanda that you go into.

It's different than what we really think it is or something. It's fucking crazy. It's exactly like Wakanda. It's just Indiana. That's exactly how I would describe it. That's what I tell people. I initially say I'm from Wakanda. You mean like Indiana?

I'm like, that's exactly what I'm talking about. Everyone always throws, and myself included, when they get a Super Bowl. I think they had an F1 race or something like that. I was like, in Indiana? You haven't been then because it was perfect. There's no traffic. There's a ton of great bars. The people are unbelievable. It's just a fucking city.

It's not right, dude. These people are lying to you. It's also when you hear things like there's no traffic. It's like, we're just grasping at anything. The environment's great. They got fields. Civic planning is awesome. You haven't seen sunlight.

They've got sunlight. It's up. It's north and then it comes down. So where are you now? So I live in Los Angeles. I actually lived in vegas for like nine or ten years so my parents in vegas yeah yeah in vegas yeah right near all the right in that part i'm like near meth like in vegas vegas that's code for like yeah i actually i

dabbled i don't know what's worse like living on the strip or living like a way you know if you're in somewhere else in nevada i feel like it's like that's really weird yeah if you live on the strip or living away. If you're in somewhere else in Nevada, I feel like it's like, that's really weird. If you live on the strip, I would imagine you're pretty crazy. If you're on the strip, you're working. But by devious means. So we were outside of the strip. My parents moved from

Indianapolis to do an air conditioning company out there. Good spot. At least they were, you know. Meth? Yeah. You know, this meth thing falls through. In Las Vegas.

We've got to come back to Wakanda. So, yeah, so I lived there pretty much all through high school, and I lived out in L.A. when I was like, I moved out when I was like 18. I've only known one other guy who lived in Vegas, and I think it's weird. And he's dead now, right? Yeah, I know. I hate that guy. He's also very normal too,

so maybe I've made this thing up in my head. But I just feel like living in Vegas has got to be, through your childhood too, is weird. Yeah, yeah, it's weird. Like you got like, you know, they put, like in casinos, they put like kid things in adult casinos. So the mom and dad can go hit the slot for you hit the slot yeah you gotta dodge a lot of

questionable figures to get to like there's like a there'll be like a juice place or like or you know they'll be like smoothies or or there's like a kid's place or bowling or there's movies but you gotta get through a lot of oxygen tank cords and you gotta it's like an escape room of like that guy's touching me weird. But I think he's smoking. I don't know. Like it's a lot of just – So you were in it. I was in it.

I was in it. You were living that life. Yeah. So yeah. So I lived there for a while. And because of it, I'm actually kind of – I'm kind of glad. Like when I go back to Vegas, I don't really indulge in any of the obscene – like I don't really gamble

because i've just seen i've seen too much yeah yeah you got exposed to it you're like a kid who did like tours of duty and war i've seen it all man that's exactly right i did i was i don't play call of duty yeah i don't play call of duty because i served yeah it's it's funny when you live in a place that's like a destination for other people i mean yeah even kind of have it in new york on a level. Like when I go to like Grand Central and people are taking pictures and it's just like a train station to me. I'm like, get the fuck out of the way. I got to get to my train.

And then you look up. It's like beautiful architecture. People are like, you know, amazed by it. I'm like, move. It's true. I got to get to track 42. It's true. I mean, the more I've visited New York, the smaller it seemed and the less I've gotten.

The stars in my eyes kind of left a little. And not because it's lost its allure. It's just you're here to do stuff. You know, you're here to – and you become more aware of the people. The more times you're here, you become more aware of, like, the people around rather than the city and the things and whatnot. You mean like the junkies and the drug addicts and the homeless people? Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah, it's like the homeless.

It's okay. I'm uncomfortable is what I'm saying. Yeah, the homeless is a funny, like, that's another thing. When you grow up around it, it's like, I don't know. It just becomes like part of the background noise. But everybody, when they first get here, it's like, I'm going to save everybody. Oh, did I ever have my first time in New York? Dude, I went to like a Catholic boarding school.

And I remember like I came to my buddy. My buddy lived in the city and we came to visit him and I guess I was going through a phase. I don't remember it where I was a good Catholic boy. We were like 15 years old and hammered walking

down. So, you know, I was really about it. You really committed to it. You're more Catholic than you know. And we were kidnapping children. You're 15, you're just taking kids. It's really easy when you're 15. It's the best way, man. You got to hand them off to an older guy later.

That's right, dude. You want to train a dog, you bring a dog. But we were hammered. We were on streets in new york i was like giving like 15 bucks or five but whatever i was to like every homeless guy i saw he's no broke and i was yelling but i was like you're a bad catholic you're not helping him out he's like shut the fuck up dude i got i got hustled a couple times and then i was like never again i'm this guy it's like a classic thing they usually run it where they bump into you on purpose and they drop a bottle of whatever

I've seen that one this guy somehow did it to me with his eyeglasses and his eyeglasses were broken and I was like how did you fucking break your eyeglasses from bumping into me but I was a sucker for it cause he really like hustled me good what did he say this whole sob story about like

I'm unable to see now and I don't have any money to fix it, and I need money from you because you broke it. And I was like, oh, my God. And then, you know, like, see him on the corner, you know, like, later, like, days later, just fucking normal, not even wearing glasses. You gave him enough for LASIK. That's super nice of you, dude. That's thousands of dollars, dude. He's getting covered by insurance. There you go.

I would say you got more than a hustle. Yeah. I had someone the other day where it was like they were walking next to me. And it was a girl. And she was on the younger side. And we were walking together for maybe not like half a block. And it wasn't immediately like I wasn't like this is a homeless person. And to this day, to this moment right now, I still don't know for sure.

They're right on the border. But she kind of just goes, you have five bucks? And she asked me so casually. I was like, hey, I'm sorry. Do you have five bucks I can have? And I was like, I don't. Kind of respect the ask. I do.

Yeah. Yeah. She just kind of, like that was like the third or fourth question she asked. She just moved it to one. Caught right to the chin. So you got her or not? Like, you fucking around? Come on.

And then it made me feel like a bad person because, again, like, I couldn't tell. And in my head, I was like, yeah, she's on her way to the office. I'm giving her five bucks for a morning coffee. She didn't have cash or whatever. Yeah, that's true. But that made me think. I was like, I think I'd be more apt to give money

to someone who has a job than someone like yeah oh yeah you need a couple bucks I got you I've done it

I've done it like where so I'm too nice I'm exactly the same where I'm too nice if I have it and they ask I can't be like I don't have

I'm not gonna lie I can't lie I just have to be like do you you exist you got me I do have it what'd you see what, you exist. I do have it. What did you see?

What did you see? There's not much of a bowl. What did you see? So what they asked, like, and I've done the same thing. The first time that I was in Los Angeles, we were visiting with my family, and I was like 18 or maybe just almost out of high school, and I had some cash or whatever, and I just, there was just, they just, it was like a line of just people who were just like, and I had some cash or whatever. And I just, there was just, they just, they,

it was like a line of just people who were just like, can, what can I get some, can I get some? And so I, you know, you walk like a block, you hand something,

you walk a block, you hand something. And by the, in like three blocks, you are homeless. You just, yeah, yeah.

It's just, those guys were, yeah, those guys were, they were tourists yesterday and now they, they live here. I've seen It's called communism. Yeah, those guys were – they were tourists yesterday, and now they live here. I've seen a guy one time, and I like to think of the – I think we've said this before, where the – like a homeless guy's first day on the job. That first day is going to be tough. You're like, well, actually, I'm going to start begging for money.

That is the worst. No friends will take me in. I can't get a job. It's officially time to write one of those to start begging for money. That is the worst. No friends will take me in. I can't get a job. It's officially time to write one of those signs and ask for money. Everyone's first day is always awkward. Nice to meet you. I'm John. But you're working with just bad, bad people.

You're practicing your handwriting. You'll figure it out later. You'll figure it out later. I'm with a joke. I say I'm a veteran. We're going to take a break around here like dude

I saw a guy once I was coming home I was taking the train back from Massachusetts and I was getting off at Penn Station and like like I think I saw the moment where the guy was like he was like yeah alright I'm homeless and he

cause he was it was – it's a weird feeling watching some soul break. And he was – because he was fairly well-dressed. I've done a whole story on this guy. Like in my head, I've planned his life. Like he moved to the city, like Madonna, like 12 bucks in his pocket. And he was like – he was like was like i'm gonna be a model because he's sharp looking fella and and he was well dressed and he had a scarf on not a lot of homeless in scarves uh and outside of cartoons and uh he drops his bag and he just laid down

and i was like that's it i was like that guy was done yeah i got it committed to the life i was tired auditions i couldn't afford headshots. Once your back hits the sidewalk, that's it. Yeah, that actually is the good. Has your back ever been on the ground? No? You've still got some energy. Oh, man.

So your break was America's Got Talent? Yeah, yeah. That was, yeah. Man, it feels so like, when was your break, kid? When did you... Yeah, so 2015 I did America's Got Talent.

We were filming here at Radio City. That was the last season before it went over to LA. And how old were you when that happened? Jeez. I was a young Catholic boy. You were out of money. You didn't leave Radio City. There were too many homeless guys.

It just happened. I was eight years ago. Oh man, I'm so bad at math. 24, 23. Hell yeah, you're as bad as me. I like that. That sucked. I hate how much time that took. The math that this guy can't do sometimes is staggering.

He'll pause and I'm like are you fucking kidding me you really don't know the answer yet I use my fingers man I get them dude the other day my daughter's seven

and I had to like sign off on her homework and it was math and she had the number and then it said like how did you get to the answer like show your work

and she wrote so I said how did you get your answer and she said I used my fingers. Yeah. And she wrote, so I said, how did you get your answer? And she said, I used my fingers. I was like, fuck yeah. That's the best answer. You want an answer? There it is.

That's how she did it. She's honest. Dude, I saw a viral fucking whatever. I hate that word. Viral? We're out on viral now? It's just everything's viral. You want to know why I was out on it?

I saw two things recently. One, I was watching Luther. Great show. And they were. He's unbelievable. I saw two things recently. One, I was watching Luther. Great show. He's unbelievable. They were talking about a serial killer who was using the internet. He was live streaming

murders or whatever he was doing. They're like, he's going viral. 30,000 views. I was like, that's a bad instagram post yeah i delete that shit yeah re-upload i'll try a few new hashtags on this one yeah you're getting suppressed by instagram man give me a break that's not viral well that murder wasn't even worth it when When did they write this episode? A lot has happened. It was in 1999. It was in 1999. But then I was

reading this article, and it called this TikTok viral, and it had 67,000 views. And I was like, no! Everything on the internet isn't viral. I think the bar is a million. I think you have to be million. Yes, I agree with that. I think anything else is just a fake video. And even that, I think most people have no idea what you're talking about.

I think something's viral is if it's almost become part of pop culture I agree with that if people are watching it right now it can't be like a few years later you hit a million you have a window of time and it's gotta hit a certain number and then you're good

so it was 8 years ago so that's like 2015 was that like a uh tv break or was that are they do they have like an internet presence as well or was it still like i got on television and that put me in everybody's household yeah put me on that was now it's like questionable it's like should i even do tv should i focus on digital like do those shows have the same effect i think like 2015 is probably right around where it still was like you get on television you get a lot of fucking eyeballs

yeah I mean I think the viewership right around then was right around like 12 or 13 million or something like that that's viral that's a few times viral 30,000 he's going viral dude I would love to be that guy

30,000. I feel like early on, those shows. My mom. My mom. Fuck. My mom's here. Those shows, at one point, American Idol, America's Got Talent, X-Factor, whatever, weren't they doing like, I think American Idol was doing like 100 million, wasn't it?

It was like 30 million million, $50 million. I feel like they were a monster. I'm so embarrassed now. That's like a fucking group stage of the World Cup. You're Finland. Finland. The Finland comics.

But it shows, man. You get on in front of that many people yeah but I mean it's crazy because so I lost the show I guess that's how I say it I don't say coming in second

that's ridiculous anybody gets to second and is optimistic I don't know in those shows I don't think I would say I lost because time and time again we've seen

the second place guy or girl I guess that's true I guess that's true but I just feel like so it's crazy because that show, it does have a lot of eyeballs, but

I think the subscribers that I had right after then was maybe 60,000 on YouTube because I was already trying to develop a lot of stuff while the show was going on. Even just before it, I was doing a show. Most of the following that, or most of the audience that I tried to build

was always after the fact. So a lot of people think that it came from doing the show. And yeah, there's the credit and there's maybe some recognizability of that. But for me, it was, I mostly built it afterwards. So, you know, like, I think that it was when they started to make their shift from focusing on Twitter to Instagram. You can go back and see, like, I think that it was when they started to make their shift from focusing on Twitter

to Instagram. You can go back and see, like, in America's Got Talent, my season, they were like, and follow them on Twitter here. And like, you don't see that anymore. Now it's like someone's, you know, someone's Instagram or their, their, their, their, their hey now or whatever. Yeah. No, I mean that Twitter's, Twitter's the worst.

Twitter's done, dude. And people talk to me all the time. They're like, why don't you tweet anymore? And I was like, dude, I'm not trying to get canceled. Yeah, I'm not trying to roll out of bed and get canceled. I had some thought at night, and I was like, this is funny. And then I go to the gym and come back, and I'm canceled. One of my favorite quotes to this day still is, this is years ago,

but Clooney was asked why he doesn't have a Twitter. And he went, because I like to drink at night. That's the most Clooney was asked why he doesn't have a Twitter and he went because I like to drink at night that's the most no way he came up with that on his own some guy was like Clooney I got something

if anybody ever asked you here's how you said it that is true though man you get you mix those two things up you can get in trouble that was the cause of my hangover anxiety

for a few years it was like you wake up it used to be like you're in college you're like what did I do

what did I say to somebody what did I text I would first I would be like I don't think I had to like work up my card to check Twitter

but what did I say last night yeah and if I ever check something again like if I put when I used to drink which is so funny that it's come down to if I put, when I, when I used to drink, which is so funny that it's really, it's come down to this. It's like,

that's true. When I, when I used to, when I used to drink a bunch, uh, do I sound like a kid who drinks? When I used to drink a bunch. He sounded like a guy who grew up in Vegas.

It's not even like a lot. I just mean like when I had a few drinks, but I didn't want to say when I had a few drinks I said a bunch I've never drank I sound like I'm trying to relate to people who drink yeah when I would hit the alcohol when I tap that bottle

so I would do like you'll post something late at night either on Instagram or something like that. And here's the thing is usually the next morning, um, you, you still find it funny, but no one else, you know, like, you know, I, so I think like I never at least had a regret, but I did always check in and I was like, and I was like, man, that was stupid. But I, that made me laugh though. I was the same way.

I never like, I don't think I ever had something where I was like, I don't believe this. I'm deleting it. Everything I was like, that's pretty good, though. You should have said it, but I don't believe it. But there's different times. Nighttime posts can be different than morning reading. You know what I mean? That's true.

Come back to this in 12 hours. You'll laugh, too. You know what I mean? These different times of the morning. Certain things, certain topics. I remember there was one time I was dating this girl. And I think she was on the West Coast. I'm bad at math and time zones.

So whatever. The time zones were fucked up. So long distance relationships are killing. And it was like I had sent a nude being shit-faced up late. And she just replied, what'm getting out of work. She's just replied, what the fuck? It's 6 a.m. Exactly, dude.

I'm at it. I'm at it. You're at the gym before work. You're sending a picture of your balls. She's eating acai bowl. I'm not done. work you send in a picture of your ball he's eating acai bowl i mean the there really should be a a uh you know i know we like mark mark cuban had cyberdust for the to delete cyber uh snapchat has the thing where they delete. No matter day, night, morning, 6am, whatever, the sexting

time period, both people's brains are fucking whacked. And then if people, when celebrities get their tweets or their texts leaked or you read Tiger Woods and shit like that, it's like, well, these sound ridiculous now.

We're in a courtroom. Yeah. It sounds crazy. The lighting's not right. She wasn't wearing a suit when I sent it out of the preposterous. I wouldn't tell her I want to pee on her now.

In the moment, it made perfect sense. That's not fair. There should be a statute of limitations. She wasn't in a suit. She didn't have that guy standing next to her when we were doing it. He made films making it weird, okay?

And you're on the defense stand. You're like, jury, let me paint a picture. Let me paint a picture. You see the negligee? Here's a picture of Rachel Uchitel. Picture of negligee. The jury's like, all right, yeah, we're done. It makes sense now.

That shit is not fair, dude. The scariest shit I've ever seen is when Mark Cuban, he had like an interview where he goes, we have a software

and it's keeping track of everything you like or do or say. Whew, man. Dude, I mean, yeah, that's why I've also

given up though when people are like, the one thing I still haven't done is the DNA, like, you know, send your spit to a company. Yeah. That's why I've also given up though when people are like – the one thing I still haven't done is the DNA, like send your spit to a company because that feels particularly stupid. Yeah. But they've got every – they've got you. Yeah. The people who are like you shouldn't like do your face scan and you shouldn't do this and that.

It's like brother, brother. It's been a long time. We had an advertiser who i think we said no to maybe we didn't we like money we usually say yes pretty much but it was it was to store our comp oh yeah i i what i had it was like i have it was like we did not say no to them never mind they are great go get them but it was a one-off it was a one-off. It was a one-time thing. Bro, I will never forget. Is this a mom and pop? It's like, literally, ejaculate into this cup and send it back to us. You know what?

We'll come to you. No, they sent it to us ahead of time, which made it double weird. Because I had no idea that we were about to do an ad campaign for a sperm bank. Essentially, I get this box. It's a big box. I open up the cardboard box and in it is a like a like a metal and plastic box that looks like something out of like a Superman movie. It had hazmat stuff on it. Yeah, like Lex Luthor has like the fucking bomb inside.

And it had the little hazmat thingies, you know? And I was like, what the fuck is this? And I opened it up, and I feel like it was like, you know, like smoke coming out. And then it had like a cup and like a slot to put it in. And it was like, come in this cup, seal it back up in this box, and send it to us. Wait, they didn't send you materials?

They didn't send you like... No, they did. Do it on your own, bro. Dude, that's a bit presumptuous. We have such a sexy presentation. You'll come right away. Right when you open this. You're going to come. You're lucky

if we catch it. People who know, who have the data and the information on you, the Pornhub recommended for you sometimes is like, Jesus Christ. I've got to scale it back. If that's what's getting recommended for me, we've got problems. It's like, it's like omasaki. So if you like that,

you'll like this. Like, that looks pretty gross. Give it a try. Actually, you're right. It's delicious. They know better than you know. Wait, so wait, why didn't you do the cum sample? Because you guys got producers? You know, weird to do on air? wait so wait why didn't you do the cum sample um cause you guys got producers yeah

I mean you know weird to do on air I guess it was just to freeze your sperm wait yeah what was the ad like what was the ad

that had to happen I think it was like a sperm like a like you know getting older freeze your eggs freeze your sperm sort of thing

yeah that's what it was I forget what it was called exactly I think daddy was in the name the whole thing daddy was in the name I think so yeah it was like it was like you can do it from home now because i think i i would imagine it was peak covid we were we were taking that yeah yeah the campaign was like you don't want to touch that remote in that room yeah you don't want to go

in a closet with a magazine so back to that again it in your house. But that's equally as strange to be like, Mr. Mailman? There you go. That's amazing. One thing we have been talking about doing for years now, and we finally got to commit to it and do it, is we wanted to get our testosterone levels tested and see who the biggest Nancy boy is. Because I think it's going to be who's the best of the worst, really.

Yeah, I was going to say that but you're gonna have high testosterone i don't think so i'm pretty sure i'm sterile but is is it you might be sterile but is that testosterone uh i don't really know what testosterone is i don't really know anything about the human body yeah i feel like testosterone is more like you're a big dude you're a manly guy you don't grow any hair that's a little. I thought testosterone was just like a state of mind. Yeah. Bro, I'm so testosterone. I've always felt like I had the most, so I don't need science to tell me.

I have got alpha energy and a beta body. Is that it? I think so. We had a campaign going for a little while where we were the beta boys. When alpha first became a thing, I was like, not alpha we are beta and fucking proud and then next week the guys from silicon valley tv show were on the cover of like some very famous magazine and said beta boys but they they can do it because they were like they're like smart and and actors and like we're just ours we're just late like yeah yeah you guys aren't even beta yet

we're embryos we're embryos to beta i don't know i've heard yeah i've heard that like all the sperm is like dying and that's just what i heard all of the sperm no i just uh yeah i thought you were laughing at the way i said how i heard it yeah Yeah, I just heard it. I heard from some guys that the sperm's dead. A genocide on my future children. I mean, I know I've got swimmers. I have kids. I know that. But I don't even know if that's high testosterone.

I'm so not filled with testosterone. I don't know what it is. Yeah. I don't even know what you're talking about. You can just feel it. They said that smoking cigars helps your testosterone that cannot be true that makes you feel like a man

so you start thinking like a man and then you get testosterone that's the only way it works otherwise it's probably horribly fucking bad for your body I'll say this one of my most beta moments ever at Burt's thing no remember when we didn't know how to smoke?

That one was bad. This one was worse. Wait, I got to hear both of these. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This one, I was on a ski trip with our buddy. It was with Cons. It's already beta. He was in the army.

Ask him, he'll tell you. Don't ask him. Just be in a room with him, he'll tell you. And a bunch of, we were up in upstate New York up where West Point is. So a bunch of his buddies who are like coaches there and shit, they all came to the house. And we're out smoking cigars by like the fire pit. And, man, I got – it was probably me and like five veterans, just dudes, right?

And like they're – it's snowing. They're not even wearing shirts. And I get like three – Just. And I get like three... I get like three puffs... I get like three puffs into my cigar, and I am like, zooming. I'm like, I can't do this at all. But we're by a fire pit that's

dug into the ground, so it's not like a fucking upland. So I'm just standing there, dizzy, trying to figure out how I can drop my cigar and get it into the fire. So I don't have to keep smoking it. And then be like, Oh, I dropped it into the fire.

Oh, shut up. I want you to waste another one on me. And I fucking drop it. And I think I'm fucking like, like, like Doug flew, like a drop kick. And I think I'm fucking like I've dug food like a dropkick and I think I'm about to nail it

and it just fucking like hits the other guy in the foot. He's like, did you just kick that? I was like, no. I'm going to go inside with the girls and help cook dinner.

I didn't know this story either. That's unbelievable. No, I didn't. Dude, that is bad. Go to a woman. They know what to do. What's that?

Yeah, I'll be right there. No one said no. You need help with the macaroni and cheese? Okay, I'm coming. Chicks. Sorry, boys. I'm a gimme buff chick. Wait, so what's the Bert thing?

Because Bert always, he, dude, you have to know how to smoke a cigar if you're going to hang out with Bert. Well, so we didn't. I don't know how to. We got lucky enough. We were in Nashville at the same time, and he had a big after party at Zaney's, and they shut the whole place down. And I think just because he's Bert and there's a bunch of important people there, they were like, we're smoking. Because I'm pretty sure Zaney's was like, what the fuck?

Cigars smoking everywhere. I don't know what they were going to do to get that smell out, but it was just like, whatever. You know what they all did too? They all stand there and hold it up like this. Which is considered... I just don't think people... The girls and people who aren't smoking stuff, they want it in their face, so they're just talking like this. And I was like, I don't care

how much I like something. If I have to stand with my arms over my head, I'm lasting about 10 seconds. But Burt has the finest cigars. And at this point, we're very lucky. We know Burt very well and hung out with him a lot. But this was one of the first times we were like, we've got to put on a good showing. So Burt Kreischer offers you a cigar. You've got to say yes.

And I think they were passing around a clipper. But we didn't know that. And so John's trying to bite it off. and uh I think they were passing around a clipper but yeah we didn't know that and and so John's trying to bite it off which is even

I think if you're gonna do that you really gotta know what you're doing and he's like like eating it like a fucking stick of beet jerky and there's just like

leaves in his mouth and tobacco everywhere the the cigar is mangled and I was like I look like a cartoon stick of dialect went off in his mouth yeah yeah mouth, the tobacco everywhere. The cigar is mangled. I look like a cartoonist taking a dialet one off in his mouth. Yeah, yeah.

He's trying to smoke it. It's not staying lit, obviously, because it's been chewed on. It looked like a rainstorm. It was soaking wet. Absolutely awful. I remember him being like, I can't remember what to do with it. Can I get rid of this now? It's probably the first time I've smoked a cigar since the other incident. Yeah, I was going to say, I didn't even know that you...

I'm surprised you even... I think I actually did say no, because I was like, I would rather be a pussy and say no, and have you guys be like, you fucking loser, than be the guy who's like, talking fucking leaves in his mouth. But if I saw that, though... I think it was a bad showing for all of this. If I saw... If I see a dude

bite off the end of a cigar, I was like, I have not smoked as many as that guy. Yeah, well, that's the thing. I feel like if you can, you know, that is what you do when you're in a jam, right? If you know how to do that, you're probably like an aficionado. But when you don't know how to do it. It's like someone who pops off their shoe to take the cork out of a wine. Like, oh, I got it on the wall a few times. Yeah, that's your little too good.

The trashiest way to get there are you a cigar smoker yeah I smoke every once in a while I love it like a lot of comics they go to coffee shops

to write or whatever I go to a cigar lounge really I love it it's my sanctuary really yeah so I'll go but it's not that

like every time I write and I'm always there but every once in a while I feel like I I always think I'm gonna like it and then I'm doing it and I'm like

I hate this I get so fucking buzzed and I like I use the think I'm going to like it. And then I'm doing it and I'm like, I hate this. I get so fucking buzzed. And I use the chew tobacco. It's not like I have an aversion to nicotine. Yeah. I get like three puffs into a cigar and I'm fucking flying. Yeah. If you drink and you do a cigar, it'll mess you up pretty quick.

Or if you don't have a good meal under you. I always think it's just so – I always think back to like the first people who come up with these things. Who are like, I'm going to take this, roll it up in paper, light it on fire, and suck on it. It's going to be awesome. And that's going to help your desktop. We're going to build a jillion dollar industry and kill a bunch of people. It's going to be fucking amazing, man. Good for you for coming up with that shit. But that's honestly most of the posts I see on Instagram now.

Like Norman, Bert, Bill. Everybody's just smoking. Dude, it's cigars and MMA. Yeah. We're totally fucking mad. Thank God. We're not performers. Make sure you tell those guys who bullied me in high school what I do now.

I don't do soundcheck. Yeah, bro. We're all just fucking theater nerds at heart. Give me a fucking break. I've heard you kind of categorized as a stuttering comedian. I don't hear a stutter at all. Thanks, man. Yeah.

Well, thank you. Thanks. Or are you just a fucking liar? What's going on here? Yeah. I had an injury when i was uh 20 years old it was a softball injury so i had it yeah it was like later in life yeah i didn't grow up stuttering i didn't go yeah well here's the thing it's i i you some people say

it's tough like having it later in life i hear like there's always like moms of kids who come to my show who are like my son is growing up right now and he just doesn't know what to do i was gonna say he's bullied he doesn't know what to do. I was going to say. He's bullied. At least you're an adult. Yeah, at least I was equipped with knowing who I was before, you know what I mean, to figure it out. As a kid growing up, I truly couldn't imagine. But yeah, when I first did, so I had that injury when I was 20 years old. Can I ask what happened? Yeah, I had a soft, I had a grounder to the throat, which fucked me up.

But the bigger the injury, yeah. The bigger of the two injuries was when I fell back and I hit my head on the ground. And my brain hit the back of my head and then went to the front of my skull again. And so I had a, the diagnosis they gave me was a major concussion with a minor vocal contusion. And so it messed with a lot of the motor skills and my speech and my hand. Like I had to really, like over the years, I've had to really try and seek out like extra holistic methods

and like the amount of therapies that I've been in to try and combat it. And it really made me realize as much as I've tried stuff over the years, the more comfortable that I've just gotten with it and just like not tried to fight so much of it or not tried to be so hyper aware of people

caring about it that's for whatever reason been the most had the most remedial effect is just me just feeling like ah you know fuck it like it doesn't you know it doesn't define me or you know or whatever and then you stutter less because of that? Yeah.

It's a physical thing, but there is a huge mental element. It's a neurogenic stutter is what it is. But at first they thought it was physiological because of the softball. Right. Only years later when I got a bunch of scans back with this neurologist, and he's working with me for the chemicals and the brain scans, and he's intense, and he's like, you know, you've got to cut out carrots, like that guy.

I'm like, okay. Tom Brady? Yeah, it's Tom Brady. I work with Tom Brady. And he was just like, yeah, you just didn't heal your brain properly. There's no wonder that your progress has been stifled. You've still got, like, a lot of inflammation in your brain, which someone telling you that is, like, yeah, you just didn't heal your brain properly. There's no wonder that your progress has been stifled. You've still got like a lot of inflammation in your brain, which someone telling you that is like pretty scary.

How do you heal your brain properly? I did the ketogenic diet and then anti-sick odds and brain exercises. I don't know anything you just said. Yeah, no, that was what I was going to say. Good for you. I didn't either. So when he's saying all this shit to me, you're like, damn. It's a huge lifestyle change.

But, I mean, I did – I've done – That's a permanent thing or like in the moment? No, no, you're like, damn. It's a huge lifestyle change. But I mean, I've done... That's a permanent thing or in the moment? No, you can heal it. The brain's neuroplasticity is... If you can say neuroplasticity, you have crushed the stuff. Thank you, dude.

I still don't know if I said it. But yeah, it's an amazing thing. And just hearing a lot of inspiration from... There's people we don't know if I said it, but yeah, it's an amazing thing. And just hearing a lot of inspiration from, you know, like there's people we don't even know about who stuttered like, you know, Paul Rudd and Steve Harvey. Like the brain is something that's capable of healing. You just have to give it the right fuel and the right tools to be able to do that. So over the years, yeah, people knew me from when I did America's Got Talent. Like, you know, I talked a lot about it,

made a lot of self-deprecating jokes about it, and now it's not even so much something that I talk about it because, you know, I don't want to be known as like the stuttering comedian. I just want it to be like, oh, that's something that happens

to be a part of who he is or his past, but, you know, it doesn't define. Was it at some point when you were on stage, was it like a... Again, you're talking fine in this whole interview. Was there a point where you were on stage and you're struggling?

Or was it always like you were able to... Yeah, no, I struggled a lot. Starting out, for the first however many years I stuttered. In fact, I had this huge defense mechanism. You go in on someone who's not even heckling you, you're just like, what the fuck are you saying? They're like, just ordering, dude.

Like, I would love more nachos. And I think, like, you know, when I meet other people who stutter, like, we're always just, like the, like of everything all the time. And I think that my challenge was always just mitigating the fact that if someone was saying something or if someone was asking something, it was never really coming from a hostile place. You know, it's not like, you know, it's just, it's, uh, people are, people are curious or, or, or things can happen in the room and stuff. So, um, yeah, it's been, it's been something that, uh, like when you have like shit that happens in the room or whatever, stuff that happens off the cuff, that's just because my brain's working three or four times fast

enough, but my mouth is just not there. So it's just trying to get that speed to match each other. You know what's funny? I think I have the opposite. My brain doesn't work and my mouth just keeps talking. Shut up, mouth! Stop fucking talking! The thought will get there soon. Just let me vamp.

Let me vamp. I'm just saying, everything that comes to my brain immediately before giving it a single ounce of thought of whether it's a good idea to say it or not. The anti-stutter. So this, I released a special recently,

and it had, it was 40 minutes long, and it was just four jokes. It was about Dahmer, vaccine, homeless, and abortion. Real family-friendly stuff. That's what it's, the big four, right? Ten minute chunks almost? Pretty much. jokes it was about uh dommer uh vaccine homeless and abortion real family friendly stuff and

pretty much i mean i didn't divvy it up that way but it just ended up being 40 minutes so um and i didn't i don't really talk about i addressed the stutter once and that's just kind of like you know whatever you might know me because of this and here's the thing uh and then all the rest of the shit's just about just about stuff that has nothing to do with that. Just because, you know, yeah, to write like self-deprecating jokes about it and talk about it, like, you know, people can know that that's well within my – well within your wheelhouse or if that's your thing. But you want to be able to show people that you can do other stuff. And it wasn't good.

So I couldn't. That's fucking brutal. Yeah. I mean – Yeah. I mean I just – It's not something you feel like you're going to... I'm like, you know, you're playing a softball game and you're like, I want to make sure I don't

twist the knee or roll an ankle or, you know. I decided at a very early age, I was probably one of the few people who was actually pretty athletic as a child and at like seven, I was like,

I'll play outfield. I saw a kid we were doing warm ups our second baseman I was playing shortstop at the time our second baseman took one hopper to the face and his tooth was stuck through his lip? it came out because it was still baby teeth

so it came out but it was in his lip and I was like I'm playing center field I'm going to camp out under this ball injection. We're good. Did the guy who hit the ball did he feel like a total asshole? She was an asshole. I don't even remember. I don't remember

anything about that day. I only remember things that people told me about that day. And so this whole thing they could just be lying. They're like, I could walk into traffic and they're like, yeah, you drank. There's going to be a homeless guy with a bag behind you. Somebody gun butted you. You got to stop drinking and driving.

You know what I'm talking about. You're an alcoholic. No, no. It was a softball, right? I wasn't even on the field. It was just a softball right I wasn't even on the field it was just a softball I got mugged I had a thing when my brain was sagging a little bit

and just that alone the headaches I had from just like wait how do you fix your brain sagging I had a thing in my spine they fucked up they were supposed to give me a cortisone shot and they went too far and they punctured it

so your brain is kind of floating in fluid like the perfect amount of fluid They were supposed to give me a cortisone shot, and they, like, went too far. Oh, shit. And they punctured it. So, like, you know, your brain is kind of floating in fluid, like the perfect amount of fluid. And then when I had a hole there, some of that fluid started to leak out. So your brain starts to, like, it's, like, connected, I guess, and starts to, like, pull on the brain. Oh, my God. And I just remember, like, going home being like, they're like, you know, you might have some discomfort from the shot. But ultimately, like, I had some other back problems. The cortisone was supposed to help it. A couple days, you'll feel better and i was like boy those like they did not

prepare me for the like discomfort afterwards then like days went on and i was like this is fucking bad and if i just flipped my head upside down so the sagging stopped everything instantly went away so i just leave you want one of those ab things you hang in the door yeah give me that shit man i just hung upside down for like a day. I was like, you got to come back. We'll fix it. But my point being that that's a fraction of what that sounded like, and it hurt. Like, if you have something going on with your brain, it probably fucking is bad.

Well, I mean, first of all, having someone tell you, like, it sounds way worse than the result of your brain sagging. Like, your real, saggy brain. That's not great, right? It just sags. It's also very perfect for me. You got anything on your body that... It's like everything's saggy brain it's not great it just sags it's also very perfect you got anything on your body that everything's sagging yeah even my internal organs are just like my muscles my bones my brain kevin's whole body's like a dolly painting i'm a melting candle that's fucking great yeah uh yeah that's uh yeah that's I mean anything with the brain

I've learned that the brain is like I've read a lot about it and the brain is like something that there's just little effects

like I've tried so many things like people you know you hear like Rogan like Rogan will have these guys on

Rogan will have a guy on who's like yeah I did I did mushrooms and I did acid and I clinged to a tree and I'm like I just

I can't do that you know what I mean like relinquishing that sense of control. It's crazy how much, how little they don't, they still don't know about brains. Like as much as they figured out, I think they're still kind of like,

we don't know what the fuck's going on. Yeah. I always had a problem with that one when we were kids. When they were like, you just use temperature on your brain. There's no fucking way. There's no way. There's this other 90%

just chilling how do you even know that I only use 10% of my brain then what's the frontal temporal you're only using your 10% to deduce that I right

so how could you even know that you don't fucking know I know that's false because I'm using 100% this is as much as it gets from how much I use it except the math part

the math part that one's a little tricky. I use my fingers too. Brain and fingers. Yeah, so yeah, so that, oh man, I can't remember what we were asking. Oh yeah, why did you need the quarters? I just have a bad back and a bad, well, actually it's funny. I was in a softball game playing with Barstool. See, I'm noticing

something, dude. And I had a bad shoulder already that had been operated on. And we were getting our asses kicked in softball. Wait, this was kickball, right? Kickball, yeah. We were getting smoked in kickball, right? In his defense, it was on a softball field.

It was on a softball field. We played it in... Very similar games. You know how much you just crushed me, dude? I was ready to so relate so hard. I was like, dude, there's a common enemy. No, no, no. Bad mention. Bad mention. What's the one with the...

That was cricket. It was cricket. Bro, we were getting our asses kicked. These teams. We just figured, I don't know, you play kickball. We played in elementary school. You just go out there and kick the ball around. And as an adult, you kick the ball in the air every time, and they just catch it. So these other teams knew to kick it down,

and you kick it down the third baseline because you can't make a throw all the way to first. They were just getting bases. We couldn't even get out of the inning. And then we'd get up there, one, two, three, we're down. We sucked. I maintain it's better to not know how to play kickball than it is to know how to play kickball.

You guys are fucking losers. You guys out here have a coordinated path. You've got kickball strategies. It's like, all right, man. But they were like, run up the score. Yeah, yeah. Every time we popped it up, they were like, he's a rookie. So then we were like, I'll never forget afterwards, our boss Dave,

we had like a little huddle up, and he was like, all right, our only chance here is like chaos on the base path. So if you get on base, like just keep running. Just like try to, you know, because we're not going to get any more hits. And I remember like I got a base hit, and I round first, and I'm like trying to get in a rundown almost. You know what I mean? Like just we're hoping they throw the ball around.

It's our only chance we're going to score. And I end up sliding back into first with my shoulder, and it pops out. Oh, Jesus. And I was like, I knew in the moment. I was like, I'm going to need surgery. I'm going to need rehab. This is going to be a six-month thing. And I was just standing on a fucking kickball.

It came out and in. Like it hurt like a bitch, but it wasn't like I was like, oh no. I just remember being there like, you know, I'm out for six months. See you guys later. Fuck kickball. That moment of like, I cannot believe I just ruined the next half year of my life

for this. I remember also having to tell these guys, I was like, I can't play anymore because they were like, you dislocated your shoulder playing skit ball he's like does anyone have a gun does anybody have a gun

dude I love that your coach's tactic was chaos on the base path because I remember so that phrase stuck in my head it sticks in my head

because I was like in this rundown and right after that when I hurt myself he was like well what were you doing what the fuck were you doing?

And I went chaos on the base path. And Dave went oh you're right. I did say that. I did say that. That's exactly what that is. That's chaos on the base path. Dude that's the most badass shit I've ever heard. About the softest shit

I've ever heard. Chaos on the base pad. That's a tat you put right here. I got a belly tat. Chaos on the base pad. That is fucking hilarious. So now you're out in L.A. just doing the circuit out there. Doing the grind there.

So I moved out to L.A. to do acting. And I had loads of shit lined up the week that I was scheduled to do all this stuff is the same week that the entry happened. So I had all these calls. I was in with rooms. I had a casting. I was so young, and I was sent out for a lot of young stuff. So I was doing stuff like Disney and Nickelodeon I had all these callbacks

lined up for whatever that whatever that parrot whatever that parrot yeah yeah 20 year old whatever that parrot movie was that was what I was going in

what Rio that's it that's the one oh thank you there's my there's my my young wife she's of age

let's work on that bro this is my young wife she's's of age. Let's work on that, bro. This is my young wife. She's got all the testosterone. She's my child bride. She's my child bride. So, so, Jesus Christ.

Child bride is just another way to say the word young wife. Child bride sounds just another way to say the word young wife. Child bride sounds so mature. There's somebody out in Utah right now. Child wife. That sounds like a compliment. So, yeah, that was what was the most devastating. I grew up doing theater.

I went to performing arts high school. That was the whole game plan, and I never, ever wanted to do stand-up. I always admired it as an art form, just kind of in the periphery. I was like, man, that's cool that you guys do that. I worked at a comedy club just to have a perfect night job so I could have my days free to audition and stuff. So that was kind of how that happened and then you know wait so you were working there as like a not going on stage

you were like working as a bartender I went up twice at the open mic and I bombed my ass off so I was like this is just not for me I still don't think it's for me so so yeah that was out and then it just kind of worked my way

up one year i did like 101 different states i wanted to do different stages like just different places just to set like this quantitative goal for myself and then uh and then like the next year i did like five five hundred sets like every all my personal life was just going to shit but that's because i was trying to like make sense of just this injury happening. I was like it's got to be – there has to be something. So that was why like even setting my goals to like winning the show when I did it, it was just like in my head I was like, oh, this will make it all make sense. This will make it all feel justified. Who did you lose to?

Ventriloquist. See, fuck that. Like I think there are some people who go on that show and they have like a beautiful voice or a great stand up act and those are like

the normal normal like talents that we know and then it's like oh I like you know put like a carrot up my nose and out my eyeball

it's like get back with the freaks go to the circus you fucking loser this is television this is showbiz like there's there's too much apples to oranges on that show it is hard what the fuck is this about this is television this is showbiz like there's there's too much

apples to oranges on that show it is it is hard what the fuck is this about it is hard and to be honest with you I can't compete with a magician

I don't know magic I can't tell jokes and yeah and to be honest with you like how yeah it's exactly how do you compare because I saw

several people on my season who I was like oh that that dude's gonna win because that's just incredible and even the dude who won

wasn't the one who I was like oh that dude's gonna win so it's just it's just it's hard even the dude who won wasn't the one who I was like, oh, that dude's going to win. So it's just hard to really say. But yeah, so now I'm so glad that I could be here because you guys just squeezing me in. I go to Atlanta to film this week, just filming. So I literally, I'm doing four specials this year,

just mini specials. So the first one that I did, where I told you about all that material, that's all impersonal and then this next one is going to be more personal and then I think the third one

will do a crowd work special and then the fourth one I think is just going to be all injury stutter related like just talking about that that's great yeah just kind of set a nice little

set a nice little goal to work that way that's a good way to do it I have like a batch of four that kind of all kind of has like a theme in each so yeah

a little like time capsule sort of shit. That's awesome, man. Oh, thank you. Thank you, just random person in the studio. That's a great question. Our audience is here. I'm shooting a center stage theater in Atlanta

March 25th. And I think the first show sold out, but they got a second one oh great dude that's awesome so that's kind of are you going to go back to oh sure you can get tickets on my website random stranger you can get tickets on my website

at truelynch.com we need one of these and also box sperm we come to you we'll send you a box and their competitor come in a cup the two big titans

of the industry come in your come out that's great man come in a cup I love it man we're going to go next door and do we'll answer the internet

you down? yeah you serious? yeah I don't yes you'll do it thank you very much and do a little answer to the internet. You down? Yeah. You got a series? Yeah, I don't. Yes, yes. You'll do it. It'll be good. Okay. Thank you very much. សូវាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប� Thank you.