KFC Radio - KFCradio: Chad Ochocinco, Uncle Luke, and Dinosaurs vs People

Episode Date: September 6, 2018

Did you know that Chad Ochocinco used to be a stripper? He's doing his best now to give back to his community with Uncle Luke in their new documentary Warriors of Liberty City. Voicemails include: dinosaurs vs people, have a period or go bald, ex-gf got arrested for murder, going to strip club alone, good food or good drinks, fiance in gay porn.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. This episode of KFC Radio is brought to you by Season 9 of Shameless. And I'm realizing right now, we're on Season 9 of KFC at Barstool. Are we? Yeah. It was just my 9th anniversary. Oh, KFC. I thought you were going to say KFC Radio. No, yeah. kc radio is like

seven now we're pushing seven did i was i right after you yeah like right after i thought i thought you guys were like a year i started in august of 2009 august of 2009 yeah okay but no then i must be yeah then i must be only eight years that doesn't make any sense because i'm 30 and i started when i was 21 yeah 21 22 you know your, you know, your birthday, was it early, was it late? You know what I mean? Yeah. Okay, that's only eight years. I've been saying nine.

August 2009, so I think it was like August 20-something. So I just passed my ninth. Yeah, because I was September. I started in September. I didn't start a month after you, that's for sure. Right. Can you look at my, what's the ninth anniversary? You know, like, there's gold for like 50, and I And I think like I think this one's like wood or something.

No, woods early woods like three. I think I think one of them is I think I might have just had iron because I was like, I'm iron born. No, I was the iron price. Iron is like seven because I was right. Right. OK, that's what it was. Yeah, we're iron born here. Nine.

Nine's got to be a shitty one because 10 obviously is probably something nice yeah so shameless and my entire career pottery have pottery okay so this is the clay anniversary yeah very apropos shameless has been doing the damn thing for almost a decade now which is i mean honestly nowadays you shows, you ain't getting that many seasons. No. You're only doing that if you really bring in the noise. And obviously Emmy Rossum, Billy, Billy Macy and the rest of the gang. We had, we had Cameron Monaghan in here.

I mean, the, the, the, the, the little, the little black kid is now like a teenager. That's all the show's been on. So a shout out to everyone from Shameless. Also, keep your eyes peeled for this season. You might see something in the alibi room on our guy, Kevin. You might just see a little. When we were in L.A., we didn't have any footage. We weren't allowed to film there.

We might have planted some seeds. We might have had a couple pops around the alibi room. It could be a little crossover. So look out for season nine of Shameless. And my girl Emmy Rossum. What a smoker. Love her. I love Emmy Rossum.

Actually, I'll say I love Emmy Rossum. I love Fiona Gallagher. She's a bad bitch. You know who my other favorite girl is? Talk into the mic, John. Sorry, I was trying to Google something, too. It's Kristen Ritter. Who's that?

She's in, yeah, you know what's up. Logan agrees. She was in, like. She's in Breaking Bad, right? Yeah, she did. Jane. Jane. Jane, yeah.

And I like how you put those two together, because they're very similar. I love her. Yeah. Oh, God. The dark hair. She's always got that like bitchy gothy type vibe going jessica jones is like buddy there's there's one more chick who i can't think of her name but she's kind of the same lizzie caplan let me see that one it's been lizzie caplan like lizzie caplan was in uh in um she was a new girl she's a master of the sex she

was like she dated jake johnson for a new girl for a little master of the sex She dated Jake Johnson for a little while And you know who I like is kind of like the older version Of all these chicks is the little girl From Louis Louis CK's wife in that She was also in Californication She's just like this foul mouth She's a girl who

I don't think she's acting I think she's just being herself on all these shows She's from Long Island I don't't think she's acting I think she's just being herself On all these shows She's like a foul mouth drunk She's from Long Island I don't know that for sure But I'm positive But she is yeah Shout out to all my

All my dark haired Like bad bitch girls out there That's really what it is We got Our voicemail With kind of sad eyes Yeah with a lot of With a lot of like

Well that's Terror eyes Terror eyes Terror eyes Like there's something There's a fire But it's sad You might beat me

With my own boot While I'm sleeping one night We might just go to a bar And just drink Until we're dead I might say What do you want to do On your first date

And he's like Go to a dark bar And drink until we die And I'm like This My Romeo and Juliet The other one What do you want to do after

No I want to die I want to not emerge From that bar. We got a lot of voicemails on deck that John is particularly excited about. He was like, yo, we got fire voicemails. So John's actually going to pick them today. But first, we have had the luxury of meeting a lot of people, doing a lot of cool interviews, celebrities, athletes, notable people, whatever.

But there are certain people that still move the needle big time. And there are certain pictures and things that Barstool people do that make me go, holy shit, is this real? And our guy, Roan, put a picture this weekend of him at a goddamn bachelor party with

motherfucking John Mayer. I, you know what? Can someone pull this picture up for me? Cause I've heard about it. I haven't seen it. It's just like a picture of him and the boys. Like a bachelor party picture. I think Rowan's doing the b-boy stance.

A bunch of guys with their arms around each other. Fucking John Mayer's in the middle of it. Oh my god. And it's the dude from the league too. What? Yeah, the guy. I think it was, you know, Rowan's always rubbing elbows with the Hollywood people. He goes out there. He does these three month sabbaticals where he just goes to LA and does TV shows.

And I think it was a guy who writes for the league that also wrote for his show and knows John Mayer. He gets all plugged in. And it's just Rowan and the boys, except one of the boys is John fucking Mayer. That's one of the guys who, I don't care how long I do this.

I don't care how many people I meet, what I do. John Mayer is the type of guy that makes you go, holy don't care how long I do this. I don't care how many people I meet, what I do. John Mayer is the type of guy that makes you go, holy shit. He seems like just the coolest in the world. He might be my, like, if I could switch lives with someone, he might be my guy. Yeah, but honestly, there is obviously the sex appeal to females there that fuels that. But more than that, he's got this raw thing to him where you're like that dude's the man yeah i was reading an article that was it was just someone some musician kind of like

a small time i guess he became big but he's talking about back when he was smaller like 10 years ago and he said he was over his buddy's house and kind of the same thing with roan was yeah i know john mayer and he said dude don't come over and it was like 2 a.m they were doing drugs john mayer just rolled up with a guitar and they just fucking rocked out yeah john mayer was just dude, Tom will come over. And it was like 2 a.m. They were doing drugs. John Mayer just rolled up with a guitar and they just fucking rocked out. Yeah. John Mayer was just up at 2 a.m. on a Tuesday night. Was down to go fucking. Like everybody else who gets that big, it's like, I got to check with my publicist.

Or like, I don't do appearances. It's like, he's still living his life totally, relatively normal. Yeah. And he just happens to be like a musical, sexual entertainment icon. Oh, sure. I mean, that, you know, if I could shred the guitar, if like girls, I mean, I feel like his body count, he's got a list up there. That's like Jeter and like, you know, it's higher. Well, I don't know if I don't know if anybody beats Jeter in just like number of a lister.

OK, you know what I mean? Yeah. I'm sure that the actual number is higher. Yes. Because again, I feel like John Mayer will also just like fuck a waitress from,

you know, he'll Tiger Woods that shit. So it's like, he'll be out on tour. I mean, oh, you know what the coolest thing John Mayer's done is? He just did that

fuck Jennifer Aniston? The dive bar tour. Yeah, right. That's exactly the essence of John Mayer. It's like, I'll still do that. Yeah.

I'm still gonna do a dive bar tour. You know, he's made his bones doing like Daughters and Body is a Wonderland but then also like does the Grateful Dead tour and like fucking plays guitar with every major band and fills in for every major guitarist

and the uh what was it the Nikon Theater I think he did the on his live album has the free fall on yes yeah John Mayer's I love TP and the HBs my dad always called me even though running down a dream that video used to scare the hell out of me very terrifying

it was like if you're on psychogenic drugs which is exactly what they were doing but but the love Tom Petty John Mayer free fall the end the John Mayer. Every fallen for me. The and the John Mayer.

He plays Michael Jackson. Human nature. It's unbelievable. Better. It's better than the original. I'm glad Michael Jackson dead. So John Mayer. Yeah.

So I guess the question is here. If you were going to go on a bachelor party who would be you know your uh number one like guy to be there to just get to hang out with because and i mean i think we almost have to throw john mayer out because i think he's the answer because again he like bachelor parties you need someone who's going to like do some dirt he's going to get down yeah yeah you do it with like a celebrity who's too big or too squeaky clean and it's like all right this guy's not even gonna like go to the strip club we're not even gonna drink with us or not even gonna talk to people at the bar yeah john mayer will probably be the guy like leading the charge big ah i brought the blow let's go here you know the uh my guy is the

guy i always go back to and things like this channing yeah i'll take ct yeah we i mean the channing jonah duo yep Jonah was going to be number two. Yeah. It was going to be Channing Tatum. Those guys, they just know how to fucking party and have fun. And I mean, I'm also, when we go on the bachelor parties, you know me. I'm not an activities guy. I'm not looking to do a round of golf.

I don't want to go paintballing. I don't even really want to go to the steakhouse. Channing Tatum, he wants to float in a pool with a 30-rack of course lights. I'm in. For that. Like, we'd be float in a pool with a 30-rack of Coors Light. I'm in! We'd be the guys. You guys go do the activities. I'm going to hang out with Channing and we'll meet you guys when you're back. When you guys get back here, we'll be wasted.

You better be ready to catch up. I'm going to shower. I'm probably going to masturbate. Drink a bunch of beers by myself with my buddy here. And you guys can come back covered in paint. Fine. Well, you know what? I was going to put Bradley Cooper in there, but he's sober. Is he?

Yeah. Is that a new development? No, no. He's been sober since college. Wow. His party trick in college was he'd like- That's funny to do the hangover and be like, I don't even drink. He'd headbutt.

His party trick was he'd headbutt cement floors and walls when he got wasted. That's not- I guess he's a trick. He realized that that was not a good idea. He said he still, he's, it was, I think I read this in a Rolling Stone article ages ago. I think it was for The Hangover, The Hangover 1. And it was just, they were talking about drinking

and stuff like that. And he said, no, I've been, he went to Georgetown, I think. And he's been sober since. I guess that'll do it. If it's like, well, listen, every time I drink, I smash my head into things. I can't trust myself anymore. Sometimes I think, what would it take for me to get sober?

And it's like, I guess it would have to be like, I constantly cause bodily harm to myself. Yeah, it's not like, I black out sometimes. I don't get over that. As long as the alcohol is making me black out. If it's a fucking cement wall, like the kind in the basement where it's got's got all the ridges to send their blocks like you know a frat basement wall yeah that's like you're just smashing your head against concrete and asbestos that's all yeah I mean

uh I'm gonna see maybe we can get Ronan here to you know give us some tidbits I don't think he's gonna really be dishing out all the details of what John Mayer was doing on a bachelor party weekend but uh maybe we can get Ronan to give us a little recap on on I mean just what an asshole roan is you know like i'm a rapper i hang out with john mayer i do i can just do like

freestyle musicals fuck you roan let's get into these voicemails they're brought to you by dollar shave club you want to look good do you want to feel good you want to smell good do you want those things john i know you want those i do i always want those things, John? I know you want those things. I do. I always want those things. The problem is you're not that good at those things. Come on. I'm fantastic at them. I don't know how you smell. I smell great. Do you?

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$5. After your starter set, they will ship at a regular price and you can pick the frequency every month, every other month, whatever you want. So make sure you check out their new video too when you go to dollarshaveclub.com slash KFC for the $5 DSC starter set. That's dollarshaveclub.com slash KFC. John, you are picking the voicemails today. I also might throw a ad read your way. We'll see. Big day, Johnny. But'll see about it. But you were excited about the titles. There were a lot of good ones today.

I'm going to start with Dinosaurs vs. People. Yes. Let's go. Fights, KFC, Super Seducer BC. I've got a question for you. Well, more of a hypothetical. So what if all the dinosaurs came back? Who do you take?

All the dinosaurs or all the people? And yes, of course, we have guns. Thank you. Viva. I've thought about this before. I mean, the problem is, like, heavy artillery is just going to win out every time. Yeah. We have things that pierce tanks.

Right. I understand that T-Rex has thick skin and you know words don't hurt him but if i shoot a fucking armor piercing round at t-rex it's gonna get him i i mean yeah but i don't know if like um just like you with a gun no but i feel like you know like a fucking oh yeah like an artillery gun or like a fucking tank i don't even know if just like guys with handheld guns even like automatic ones is going to take down the t-rex no i don't think so and I don't think me with any gun Right But luckily we have Marines

I think it needs to be like bazookas and shit like that I think you need to explode a dinosaur I think it needs to explode and blow up I think so You know what I saw the other day real quick On Reddit Shower thoughts which was like one of my favorite things Cause it's always things where you're like that's genius

They said To To dinosaurs shower thoughts, which was one of my favorite things. It's always things where you're like, that's genius. I think about those things in the shower. To dinosaurs, humans are post-apocalyptic. Jesus Christ. To dinosaurs, humans are post-apocalyptic mutants. It's true.

The dinosaurs are up there being like, what the fuck took over our Earth? What are they building? How are these things working? When we watch those movies, it's like the dinosaurs up there being like, what the fuck took over our earth? What are they building? How are these things work? Right. When we watch those movies, it's like, it's like, yeah, the, the, the, the, the year is like 2200 and the world is now inhabited by like mutants with five arms and fins. Dinosaurs. It was like the year is like, you know, fucking one BC or whatever.

There's a guy out here turning water into wine. But even, but that's got gotta suck because in our version, the post-apocalyptic world is usually like an alien or a very smart being. And this, it's like, wait,

these guys? Like, I'm a fucking monster. That little twerp like runs the world? It just picked up a dog shit? Why? It doesn't even run

its own world. The dogs do. Right. That's probably what they think. They go, wow, look at these little furry dinosaurs that are running the planet. What is that? A doggosaurus? What is that thing over there?

Look at these things they drag from behind. They think we're getting dragged, like we're behind a car. Look at it, trapped another one. The poor dinosaur has got such a fucking raw deal. Like, you know, they probably would still be running this bitch if it wasn't for this rogue goddamn meteor. Well, if it wasn't for God, Kevin. Oh, right. Actually, to be honest, sometimes I think that maybe God did kill the dinosaurs.

Because, like, I don't know. When was the last time a meteor hit? You know what I mean? Meteors seem pretty fucking rare. It doesn't happen very often. You're going to tell me that conveniently when beast monsters used to run the world, that a meteor finally hit? I don't know.

It doesn't seem like it ever happened. Has it happened again? They were running the world for millions of years, right? Yeah, they had a pretty good run. They had eras. We've only had 2,000. The Jurassic era, the Mesozoic era. I'm just saying that it's like you know,

there's been no other moments where we talk about meteors. It's really one meteor that's hit Earth. As far as we know. No, but I feel like they even know, alright, this one caused an ice age and this one happened here. It's not like it's a regular occurrence. No, it's not. What's that about? I'm just saying, you think

about fucking space and there's just meteors should be crashing into us all the time. I don't think so. I think we're super small in space. Clearly not. I think we're really, really, really tiny. Yeah, but I also just feel like there's a billion fucking asteroids floating around. It's like an ant

saying, I should be stepped on all the time. Well, no. Like, there's a huge world out here. Okay. That makes sense. That's good logic. Thanks. I got it.

So really, that's what happened. So imagine being that ant that's like, I got stepped on. None of my friends have ever been stepped on. That was the dinosaurs with the meteor. So it is a raw deal. And it really is. Like, all right, this one rogue meteor. So it is a raw deal. And it really is. Like, all right, this one rogue meteor. We would have run this, bitch.

It's almost like a team that's a dynasty and there's a major injury. It's like, oh, we would have won fucking 10 in a row. But this guy blew out his knee. The dinosaurs were led by us. Yeah. It's like we were drafted number one overall. We just OD'd on coke when this fucking meteor hit us. So final answer. The humans are going to win.

I mean, ultimately, really, you could pull the trigger and just drop nukes. We'd all die, but the dinosaurs ain't beating us. Yeah, no. Plus, when we get to higher ground, if it was just us with sticks, yeah, we're fucked. But we have fucking skyscrapers. We can go just go. They're done. I mean, dinosaurs stand no chance against humans.

No chance. Okay. I'm just thinking stand no chance against humans. No chance. What? Okay. I'm just thinking like, what parameters? They'd win some wars. Yeah. They win some battles.

They'd win the war. Yeah. It would be like, it wouldn't be like an open and shut case. You'd be like, well, we lost Cleveland. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like Ohio, the dinosaurs took over Ohio. We're running shit in New York and eventually we'll figure it out. Also, there's like a lot of bad-ass animals right now and we're all right. We dominate them. Yeah. Like we put them in zoos and we make'll figure it out. Also, there's like a lot of badass animals right now and we're alright.

We dominate them. Yeah, like we put them in zoos and we make them our bitch. a lot of bears. Yeah. Or a tremendous amount of rhinoceroses. I mean, like we'd all have

a little bit of a problem, but overall, human kind's probably going to get it under control. I mean, for the most part, let's be honest, rhinos, dinosaurs. Hippopotamus is pretty much

a dinosaur. Sharks are dinosaurs. Alligators, crocodiles, they're dinosaurs. They're smaller, but they're dinosaurs. We dominate the fuck out of them. So team human on this one. Next question. Male period or bald?

Oh, this is impossible. Hey, KFC, A-Fight, hey, Super Producer BC. Hey, so I got a hypothetical so um girls you know how they always like complain when they're like on their period or whatever so um would you rather lose like 40 percent of your hair by the time you're like 25 or 26 and probably like the rest of your hair by the time you're like 30? Or would you rather have like a period, like forever, like a woman, but you have to put a tampon basically in your dick. So I don't think it's as bad as girls say it is.

I mean, to go through it once a month and to keep my hair. But let me know what you guys think. First of all, hot take. Shout out to all the girls out there who are like, fuck this guy. It's not so bad. Just deal with the bleeding for a week and the crazy hormonal mood swings and all that shit. I mean, you can't lose your hair. I'm never choosing to lose my hair.

It is the most important thing that you have as a guy. What do you think is more important? Like humor and personality or your hair? I think it's actually the second. I think humor and personality. I think so too. Because, I mean, there are bald guys who have like hot girls, you know? You can always get the girl or have a good job or be well-liked and be bald.

But after that, as far as looks go, let's put it that way. It's the most important thing. You can be fat. You can be like poor and not have like nice style, all that shit. If you got some hair on your head, you can work with it. So going bald is tough. Again, I've said this a million times. I haven't felt good in, I don't know, 16 years.

As a matter of fact, when girls are like, oh, it's so tough once a month. I'm like, well, it's tough all the month. Yeah. The whole month. And I'm not saying it's that for men, for all men, but for this man, every single day stinks. Man, this is my loose definition of man. I have cramps all the time. Headaches all the time. Headaches all the time. When Ellie was in here the other day, and I was walking with a horrible limp, and I couldn't bend over because my obliques hurt.

She's like, what is wrong with you? And I didn't know Ellie well enough to say it. I had sex for 12 minutes yesterday. So the excuse I came up with was, I drove a lot yesterday. Not a great one. You were driving something. I don't know if that's better. I think I was sitting down for a while.

But every morning I wake up and things hurt. When I was laying down for 10 hours straight on Monday, I watched so much TV. Yeah. I was moving on the couch to avoid bed sores. Roll over. I was hurting. And it was hurting my shoulders. So my body hasn't felt good in forever.

My back. Are you worried about when you're really old? I'm worried about that. Because I am the type of guy who is like, eventually I will get in shape. Once this website sells or once I can slow down a little bit, I will get my body in order. I'll make sure I'm, like, okay. I'm never going to do that. So, like, when we're 40, when we're 50, when we're 60, we're going to be really bad shape, man.

You know what my problem is, too, is I'm basically a Christian scientist. I don't believe in medicine. Oh, okay. Right? And it's not that I don't believe in it. Yup. I just don't have a medicine cabinet. I don't believe it I just I don't have a medicine cabinet I don't have

vitamins I don't take anything at all so this past weekend the fateful troll foot picture I broke a toe and my friend and his dad who was a doctor

said put it in an ice bucket that'll help with inflammation that'll help make you feel better keep the swelling down yada yada yada yada i was no i'll be fine right so i was limping around forever and eventually they brought me out an ice bucket put my foot in it and then sat on my leg so i couldn't get it up they did that 20 minutes on 20 minutes off 20 minutes on 20 minutes off yeah felt so much better felt amazing if i just went to doctors or took medicine i I'd probably feel pretty good. But I don't. But that's what I'm saying.

So, like, do you think that we're just going to keep that up? Yeah. Yeah, no, I would. And then, like, when you're 50, you'll be dead, right? I mean, hopefully, I – I don't know why he's laughing. I thought it was just going to end with hopeful. Hopefully.

We can cut it there if you'd like. Hopefully I find love or something and someone has to teach me to be an adult. I definitely keep thinking I don't want to die early. I have kids. But I'm probably going to. Yeah. Yeah, probably. That's a bleak thought.

It's morbid. Sure. Sure. We'll go to a better one. X got arrested for murder. That's a bleak thought. It's morbid. Sure. Sure. We'll go to the better one. X got arrested for murder. Let's brighten this up. KFC fights super producer BC. Got myself a nice situation here.

She was back. It was actually a long time ago. I was working with this girl. She seemed into me. She texted me in the outset, when are we going to hang out? So one day I invited her to my buddy's vacation house, and it happened to be the same night that we got bin Laden. So being the true blue, uncut, cold-blooded American that I am,

we celebrated by having some extracurricular activities. And by that, I mean sex. Do you call yourself a cold-blooded American? Many years later now, I just get this text that this girl was picked up for murder. So I guess my question is, what's the wildest story that happened with one of your partners? Let me know. Man, I don't have anything that even comes close. That's awesome, by the way.

That is great cocktail party material. Like, I want someone to go, she's a murderer. Yeah, I mean, that's, what a fucking dick for not telling us what she'd do. You know? How would she do it? Oh, I was going to say, I think she murdered someone. No, how would she do it? Was it, you know, she ran over someone with a car accidentally?

Or was it like, I hit him with an axe in the head? Did she shoot someone in the fucking face? Yeah. Because those are different things. Did she set someone on fire? Accidents happen, you know? Particular homicide, it's a thing. Yeah.

Maybe you could even plead that down to manslaughter. If you hit someone in the face with an axe, you're a literal axe murderer. It's a different fucking story. Like, she poisoned someone slowly Like six cents Right, right Just putting fucking Visine in drinks

Or whatever the fuck it was Bleaching in Yeah In her daughter's soup Yeah Imagine if you were like Yo, my girlfriend from high school Was putting bleach

In her daughter's soup Oh man Hey yeah Remember that urban legend Where people were putting aids needles in the fucking pay phones yeah that was well that was my partner she was she was tricking her daughter into thinking she'd she pretended she had diabetes but she'd inject her with aids every day uh i mean that's the kind of stuff i i mean i wish i wish i had a story like

that yeah i it's like oh my partners, I don't know. They went on to like find better guys. Yeah. Married them and had babies. Really lovely families. Literally all mine. I would love it. They lived happily ever after.

You know what I would really love? All of my exes started to live fairytale lives after me. New romantic comedy. You're like the good luck Chuck, but it's kind of like the reverse. Well, no. Yeah, you're the good luck Chuck, but like we're going to paint like a really black, like dark picture. Yeah. You're like the good, like good luck Chuck, but it's kind of like the reverse. Well, no, yeah, you're the good luck Chuck, but like,

we're going to paint like a really black, like dark picture. Yeah. You know? And you're welcome ladies, because then they went to go on to see any guy, and it was, compared to my last.

Right. You opened up, yeah, a whole new world here. I would really like to have been with a girl, who is like a black widow type. Wait, I'm actually kind of thinking it's maybe even more twisted. Okay.

Because they're settling for guys that they would have never liked before me. Oh, so that you lowered the bar. Yeah. So those guys, so it's a shout out to those guys. You're welcome to those guys. She's a pretty girl. She's pretty cool. She would never even look your way, but I am so bad that they were like,

I'll take the next guy that comes along who's not John. So you're welcome, fellas. I would love a girl who's like a black widow who goes on to kill all her exes, all her men, but for some reason she didn't kill me. Wouldn't that be cool? Her body count is a literal body count. Yeah. She's got eight bodies.

So everybody who she has been with, she murders. But for some reason, she didn't murder me. You got away. And it's like, wow, yeah. Did I get away? Or am I just slinging that dick so good she couldn't kill me? Or does she have a soft spot for me? Or something like that.

That would be awesome. I would love some sort of murder background story. There would be documentaries done on you. In fact, there would be scientific studies done on you. What does he have that rejects the idea of murder? Right. I'd like to find the answers. Whatever, like, a black widow is

poisonous, I have the anecdote. I'm the guy who... The anecdote's in my blood. This is a superhero movie. Yeah, now I know. I'm the anti-black widow? Fuck, yeah. I mean, that... I really am fascinated. I widow? Fuck yeah. I mean, I really am fascinated. I'm loving this voice. I can't imagine being like calling your boys, being like, yo, do you remember Jessica?

She murdered someone. Did you see the news? She killed that guy. I fucked her before. I did anal with that girl. That's crazy. I would love to. I would go visit her

in prison yeah talking through the glass like hey what's up we end up getting married we do a Charles Manson thing we're back to the

romance and comedy it's a dramedy just a rom-com just like sending the letters kanji visits here and there couple kanjis

oh man if anybody if any of my exes want to go murder someone that would just be fantastic fantastic take one for the team here man, if anybody, if any of my exes want to go murder someone, that would just be fantastic. Fantastic. Take one for the team here.

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All right, next voicemail, Strip Club alone. Hey, guys. So what's up, first of all? Second of all, love the show. You're all great. I'm not going to say all your names right now because I'm a little drunk and I think you're going to miss them all. But long story short, I live in Atlanta where you can imagine there's a lot of strip clubs

and sometimes I like to go to them alone. And I've found that the strippers and ladies there really enjoy it. They don't have to deal with a whole crowd of men. They don't have to deal with any of that. But I usually spend up a whole lot of money. I was wondering, my question to you is, would you go to a strip club alone, and what are your thoughts? Well, I mean, of course the

strippers and the people like it. You are, like, you have a target on your back for, like, the loneliest man who's about to spend all of his money in the world. You're about to buy drinks, you're about to buy lap dances, because if you're going to be there alone, when you're with guys, you can go to a strip club and have fun like you're at a normal bar, you know? If you're by yourself, it's like you're looking for lap dances, if you're going to be there alone when you're with guys you you can you can go to a strip club and have fun like it's at your normal bar you know if you're by yourself it's like you're looking for lap dances you're looking for to throw dollar bills that's all there is to do

so of course they like you uh would you go to strip club alone no because i mean you don't like going with with a group yeah i i i don't like going anywhere with like a crew I can't disappear into. Yeah. And I think I get what he said. His his his angle is genius. If you're into that kind of thing. Yeah. Like I am not looking at I'm not at a circuit looking for intimacy. Well, you have you have social anxiety. You want people talking to you.

Don't people coming up to you. You don't want any sort of attention, let alone grinding their ass on my dick. No, thank you. It's a strange, strange phenomenon. I like keep that very sexy butt away from me. Yeah. grinding their ass on my dick. No, thank you. It's a strange phenomenon for John. It's like, keep that very sexy butt away from me. Yeah. I mean, if we're back at home, grind all goddamn day.

But if we are in a strip club, again, I tell you, I build the wall. I don't. You ain't getting in. Because I can't. Make Feidelberg great again. Build that wall. I spread my pants so you can't get my dick So like if I'm

If I'm getting his lap dance I'm too drunk to get a hard dick Yeah That's the only time I'd get one That's the only time I'd be comfortable getting one So like I'm That's not why

I go to strip club Not for intimacy I go to strip club for entertainment Right So that's where you want to see people Like the ping pong show You don't want to like And it's more fun for me

Except for your stripper girlfriend The 1% is an action movie Which you so stupidly just let like the ping pong show. You don't want to like. And it's more fun for me. Except for your stripper girlfriend. The 1% is an action movie, which you so stupidly just let like fall by the wayside, didn't you? Yeah. You just stopped texting her. And I got. Like if nothing else, like that is just a fun fucking situation. I got a new phone and I don't have, I always get those messages like the iCloud hasn't backed up in six years.

Yeah. I'm like iCloud. I have so much more shit on my plate than saving six more, the six pictures I've backed up in six years. Yeah. I'm like, iCloud, I have so much more shit on my plate than saving the six pictures I've taken in the last six years. Yeah, but when you've got a goddamn stripper on the line, like, who knows where that goes, John? Maybe she's a murderer. Yeah, God, that's the dream, isn't it? You know? Like, maybe you just let that slip through the fingers.

Sometimes you say things, and those two react, and I don't't and I'm like, yeah, this is... That didn't even phase me. They were like, oh shit, yeah, he wants to get murdered. I was like, yeah, that's just John. I watched The Purge last night. The premiere. And it was... There are these things called the angels of something.

I forget, the angels of the invisible or something like that. And they just go out to sacrifice themselves. It's a wild scene. They just go out and kill themselves they go they just go out there just stand there like they're dressed like in a row to get purged like somebody else will kill them sacrifice them oh so it's like everybody out there wants to commit murder like go ahead yeah get me it's a wild john is an angel of the invisible what are you gonna be for halloween i haven't dressed up for halloween and i don't know how long. This might be the year. I can't even answer these questions anymore because, I mean, we can't go to a strip club alone.

No. There would be pictures of us. There'd be like, look at this fucking depressed piece of shit who just had a strip club alone. Like, I don't even like being at a bar. It would go viral and then it would be, oh, wait, that's fights. It would be a thing where it just went viral on itself. And then said on a second you know what zoom in it's fine you know what i think i'm gonna do i'm gonna combine book at the bar guy with the strip club alone guy i'm gonna bring a book to the strip club oh that and i'm just gonna sit there and have these strippers like waving their asses

in my face and going crazy on the pole and i'm just gonna be buried in some charles dickens just begging for attention yeah i think i think you just you'd just get punched in the head by a bouncer. I was going to say a bouncer would just be like, get the fuck out of here. Yeah, yeah. What if I kept tipping him? The girls would say, hey, let him stay. Let him stay. I got another good song coming.

He'll like this one, I promise. I mean, that's the ultimate. You know, like girls, they always kind of like, they want to like conquer, you know, that's why if you don't show them attention, they'll be like, I, you know, I have to get that one. That's the ultimate. These strippers who get attention from everybody, I can't even distract him from a book.

You know, they say it's like impossible to pick up a stripper. It's like you'll go home with one that night if you're trying to just read a novel. That's true. Next up. Next up, we're going to go good drink or good food. I know my answer. And I know your answer. I got a would you rather here.

All right. Would you rather only eat high quality meals for the rest of your life? Like nice steaks, nice whatever you like. But you'll have to drink the shittiest of beers, the shittiest liquor, the shittiest mixed drink possible, everything. Or would you rather have top shelf liquor, top shelf, you know, beers, IPAs, everything like that. But you have to eat like shit.

You got to eat like, uh, right. I mean, to me, this is an easy answer for me because I feel like I don't even like – I don't like the taste of drinking. I don't like good drinks nearly as much as I like good food. See, I'm the exact opposite. Yeah, you don't like to have taste buds or something. I don't know what it is. To me, it's like even my favorite drinks, I'm like not choking down, but I'm drinking this to get drunk. I really like an espresso martini. I like a good old-fashioned. There are drinks that I'm like not choking down, but I'm drinking this to get drunk. I really like an espresso martini.

I like a good old-fashioned. There are drinks that I'm like I enjoy. But at the end of the day, I'm still drinking those to just be drunk. Food, when I eat like a really good meal, when I have my chocolate donut, when I eat my chicken, like it changes my day. The chicken changes my day. See, the drink changes my day. Yeah. I mean the drink changes my day, but I can change my day with cheap shit i can't i i like to drink just whiskey on the rocks or rye on the

rocks or scotch on the rocks that's tough so if i'm getting that out of a plastic bottle that's hard that's hard i mean even like i don't care i'll drink fucking natty lights bush lights i'll drink that yeah the beer i actually prefer yeah i prefer like regular ass light beer over like a fancy ipa or whatever like i drink vodka a lot Like if I'm drinking a lot of vodka sodas and it's like the cheap shit. Pop-offs. Yeah. Like I actually, fuck, I have, my throat will close up sometimes. I remember I was having that string where I had those allergic reactions all the time.

I went through a phase. And mind you, they're made poorly too. So it's just like, it's all pop-off. And you get like a splash of soda and some fucking shitty lye. Terrible. Yeah. I had a phase where, remember when when flavored vodkas were just popping? There was like cupcake flavor.

Orange. Orange. But a little bit after that, it was like specifically. But yeah, basically. Pinnacle had like the cupcake. Pinnacle had every flavor. And they were always. Birthday cake vodka.

They were all sweet. They were like donut flavored and shit like that I like. I'm doing the espresso shit. And I was doing cheap versions of those. And there was a stretch where like at any given night, I would like my throat would close up a little bit and I would like get super red and I'd be like, I'd get this taste in the back of my mouth. And I was just having a full blown allergic reaction to the amount of shitty alcohol I was consuming.

And I would just like keep doing it. Yeah. Yeah, no doubt. And I'd be like, sometimes it happens. Sometimes it doesn't. And like, I'd be like, turn to Caitlin. I'd be like, yeah, no, it's happening again. She'd be like, God, why'd you do it again? I don't know.

What else am I going to do? Not drink? I mean, there were other options, of course. But to me, I've just made my entire life just getting drunk off shitty things. I think I could keep doing that. Don't get me wrong. I like good food. I enjoy going to a steakhouse and sitting down and cutting into just a nice medium rare

filet. I enjoy that. But I'm totally fine eating anything. Giving up on that. I'm totally fine eating. Yeah, I mean, the flip side for me is I can eat that cheesy gordita crunch and almost be just as happy. So do I really need it?

I feel you. I mean, I had last yesterday for lunch, I had a bag of cheesy puffs and for dinner, I had a peanut butter and jelly. Right. And you're happy. So do I really need it? I feel you. I mean, I had last yesterday for lunch, I had a bag of cheesy puffs and for dinner, I had a peanut butter and jelly. Right. And you're happy. You're not, you're not sitting there like, Oh my God,

this sucks. It's like, dude, PB and J's as a kid, you kind of rolled your eyes when you opened your lunch box. It's like a treat. I love it. It's like a meal slash dessert.

Almost. It's great. It's a coin flip for me. I could take either side of this. All right. Last voicemail of the day is brought to you by Blue Apron. Speaking of good food, Blue Apron has a

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Beyonce. In day one. In day one. I just heard a story of a friend of ours, a friend of mine who's got a fiance. He's in the army as well. Oh, no. Good-looking guy.

Well-built guy. Anyway, a video just came out on a gay porn site of him jerking off. And it's bad. It's bad. I watched for research reasons and uh so this guy basically there's a video you know he's in the shower they're interviewing him like one of those

like casting things and uh yeah so his fiancee left him um i'm my question really is like You know he didn't bang anyone Like is Is it really that bad I mean he was in college When he did it He was probably just doing it for the money I'm assuming they paid him pretty well We looked into it we think he might have gotten around 1500 so I mean I wouldn't do it for that

But uh Two questions I guess is it reasonable for the fiance to leave him And uh what's your price listen if you just jerk off in the shower and someone happened to film it and then just guys happen to watch it who cares like i like i feel like there's this extra element of like it was gay porn it's like well if it was a girl who was watching you jerk off in the shower when it was straight porn loves it yeah like that's her favorite shit in the world, right? So to me, that's not gay porn. You made a video of you jerking off in the shower.

You can't control who watches it. Yeah, okay. You know what I'm saying? Good spin. It's gay porn just because apparently guys are watching it. If that was uploaded to regular straight-ass Pornhub, that would be straight porn. Yeah, that'd be.

That guy would just have done porn. Yeah. You have to be like fucking a dude or something to a dude for it to be straight porn. That guy would just have done porn. You have to be fucking a dude or something to a dude for it to be gay porn. Otherwise, that's just a solo masturbation scene. But does the fact that it ended up on a gay porn site because this guy, if I heard correctly,

he's gay, right? Is the... Oh, wait. Oh, that's different. The guy in the army is gay? I thought it was just... He was engaged to a girl. Don't tell us army is gay? I thought it was just he was engaged to a girl. Don't ask, don't tell, repeal, Kevin. Wait, I thought he was engaged to a girl. I was assuming.

I think he said my friend and his friend. Can we replay? Yeah, let's figure that out. Hey, what's up, KFC, Vice, BC? So I just heard a story of a friend of ours, a friend of mine who, uh, he's, uh, got a fiance. He's, he's, uh, he's in the army as well. Um, okay. He's in the army as well. I thought his fiance was also in the army. Right.

Okay. I don't think, I don't think it's what he was saying upon second listen where he's like, he just kind of keeps saying he, he, he like, right. He's in the army. Right. Okay. I don't think that's what he was saying upon second listen where he's like he just kind of keeps saying he he like he's in the army he's got a fiance.

But I think right off the top he says I have a friend he's got a fiance. A friend of ours a friend of mine who he's got a fiance.

Oh that's who's got a fiance. I think this is a girl. I think he has a normal fucking engagement. It's normal straight hetero. I thought it was a girlfriend whose fiance was in gay porn, but I'm not sure now. Right. Well, because he says, I have a friend, and I thought he said he's engaged to a guy in the army,

but I think he says who's engaged to a guy in the army. No, he said who's got a fiance. Right. He's also in the army. But I think he's saying. He's talking about the guy question. Yeah. got he's also in the army but i think he's saying he's talking about the the guy question yeah yeah i think this is a dude with a female fiance and he once jerked off in the shower for money

yeah and he can't help it that it was put on for guys to watch right unless of course as he was filming it it was like all right guys are gonna watch you jerk off then in that case you probably could help it but my point being he didn't actually do anything gay he just might be being viewed as so now listen this is all straight porn gay porn it can all be considered a little unsavory i think there's a lot of people who would just probably be like i'm out uh 1500 bucks is not enough no i thought it was gonna be fucked up i'm i'm out just because your negotiation skills are terrible yeah she was probably like well you're a bad business partner in life. What about when we buy a house? What about when we're negotiating

at the car dealership? Yeah, you stink at this, dude. I mean, listen, if casting couch is making $1,000 to $5,000 a day, you got to get five grand and jerk off in the shower. If you're not, especially if you're really not into porn and you're not a gay guy and some gay porn

site comes along, you got to charge a premium. Hey, listen, I'm a straight civilian. Yeah. You want to see me jerk off. We're charging 10 times the price. Yeah.

Like I'm, I'm like an Asian girl with blonde hair. I'm a unicorn. I'm something you people really sought after. You want to think of the straight guy. I'm an Asian with blonde hair, a fat ass. You got to pay a lot for that.

I'm, I'm what the gay little boys in school draw. This is who I want my boyfriend to be. I'm what the gay little boys draw. Wow. Special. Special. Realistically, you say you're a broke kid in college and some dude is like, yo,

I shoot like adult videos and you got to look to you. If you watch, you know, if you jerk off the shower, I'll give you five grand. Would you really do it? No. I was a broke kid in college. That never crossed. 10,000? 20,000?

100,000? Where's your number? Where's your number now? I think in college, it's probably lower now. Because in college, you had your whole life ahead of you, right? You had these hopes and dreams. You know, maybe a senior year you didn't anymore. But sophomore, freshman, sophomore, junior year, you're kind of like, I'm going to be something.

I'm taking pre-law classes right now. Now you know you're nothing, so you might as well jerk off in the shower. Like, I do this all the time. I'm gonna do it paid for. Yeah, I mean, I do shit way more embarrassing than jerk off in the shower for fucking way less than that a day. That takes a quick five minutes. I don't listen to my show at all. Yeah, dude, I do.

This show takes an hour, and I don't get a thousand dollars for a fucking show. Yo, shout out to our girl Asa, who was probably gonna be working hand in hand, or is today, tonight, as this episode airs. Kanye West is supposed to be running the Pornhub Awards, and she's hosting it. So she's probably going to be working directly with Kanye tonight. That's fucking awesome.

Wild, right? Who was it last Pornhub? Pornhub's so fucking the real deal now. It's crazy. Yeah, they're like the whole lifestyle brand. It's nuts, man. Remember the Pornhub Star Awards last year? When it was just wheezy on stage?

Yeah. With just a million porn stars around him. Yeah, just all dancing. He went crazier, to be honest, at the Super Bowl after party after the Patriots beat the Falcons. Oh, did he? But yeah, he was still bringing it down then. By the way, also, I probably would, if this is the way also If this wasn't a mainstream thing

I don't think I'd leave my fiance There would be If your crew of friends knew about it would you? No It's gotta be like in the post Yeah it's gotta be like Pornhub trending in the United States By the way you know what I never mentioned

When I went to Portugal they changed it to Portugal Interesting just to kind of get a taste of the culture oh just like what their front pages and stuff like that yeah like do they do incest all over the fucking place no it was like mostly watching Portugal right now and I was just like oh I know all the Portuguese are jerking off too Portuguese

go listen to Asa's podcast on the Pornhub podcast you're gonna want to hear it alright that's it for our voicemails today we're now going into an interview with Chad Ochocinco and Uncle Luke. Don't stop! Pop that pussy! We had quite the duo. I don't think I ever envisioned. Those are probably the last two guys I think I would ever expect to be on KC Radio.

Ochocinco and Uncle Luke. So that interview is brought to you by Menlo Club. You remember 5'4 Club. 5'4 is now bringing you Menlo Club. It's the L.A.-based men's fashion brand that you can get delivered directly to your house once a month. It's a clothing subscription service with curated style packages that you get delivered right to you every single month. They've been around for over 16 years. They have the brands that are housed in the Menlo Club.

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Go to The Menlo Club, create your style profile, sign up, use the promo code KFC, and you'll get that first month for $30 plus that pair of shoes and socks. It's Menlo Club, promo code KFC. Chad Johnson, Luke Campbell. Let's get it. All right, let's get it. It's another edition of KFC Radio. A very special duo here.

We got a four-man crew right now. It's Ocho Cinco and Uncle Luke, which is quite the combo for us right now. We really appreciate you guys coming through right now. No doubt. Miami in the house. Yeah, man. You guys are doing it big for Miami. That's what you guys are doing, right?

You got this docuseries going where you are basically just trying to put on for Miami and help out who needs it and just represent for your city. Oh, yeah. No doubt about it. I mean, it comes on Starz September 16th, and then you can check it out on the Starz app on September 9th. So how do you two link up? Is it just Miami love?

Or who makes the first? Way, way back. Way, way back. Way back. When he was at what I like to call the top of the food chain at the time. This docker series came about from an idea he came up with 29, 30 years ago. So the relationship itself starts back then even though it wasn't as formal because i was so young at the time but um i mean look we're we're blossomed to

now yeah i mean that's a long time to to wait but it's it's uh come to fruition now is it everything you expected it to be yes everything i expected to be i mean you know uh you know when we we started out the program, when we started the program 29 years ago, it was really about just the kids and the program and the neighborhood. It was about keeping them in the same neighborhood, not being taken

out of the neighborhood to go everywhere else. And, you know, we never knew it would blossom into something like this. We never knew that, okay uh when we started the program chad being one of the first kids in the program that'll end up you know the first kid you know go to the nfl and then now we have so many other kids it's not a bad success story you did all right you did all right you still shot the claires right yeah done that well

that's it. Remember your roots, right? What do you got on the feet today? We doing Nikes or what? I tell you what, I noticed both of you. You got Vans and Adidas. He's an Adidas guy. You rock an Adidas.

Burning your Nikes. I don't know. I don't know what's going on there. I was like, I don't know what you're talking about. Luke, you're still, I mean, just Travis travis scott and drake put out this this song and everybody's loving it and like you got that prominent shout out and that i can't tell you how often i walk around don't stop pop that pussy it's not it's not it's not good when you're like in the store you're on the subway and you're screaming that out but you're still getting uh

like a lot of love uh you know all these years years later. That's got to feel pretty cool. Yeah, it is cool. I mean, you know, for the young guys to sample my voice and sample songs, you know, it's a great thing. I mean, you know, and when they do it, you know, my phone starts ringing. Yeah, I'm sure. Oh, you heard Drake and I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I heard it.

I heard it. Somebody else turned me over to it first. Do you get a check for that? No. No? No, I don't know. You don't need it. Yeah.

You don't need it. Come on now. You got to get a check for everything you do. You got to get a check. Speaking of getting checks, my man John here is a big Patriots fan. Well, I was thinking I'm thinking for a promo for this, right? Chad, we only have four wide receivers on the roster right now. Come on back.

Me? Yeah, you. I mean, I didn't do anything the first time I was there. Why would I come back? You had seven years. You got that playbook on the wraps now. It's really not the playbook. It's just that system itself doesn't fit my skill set and what I'm able to do.

I'm a predominantly outside receiver. And if you think the way their offenses run, I hate to get into football right now, but the Patriots system, it runs from the inside out. You hear what I'm going? So every other team in the NFL, your number one is your number one receiver. You have your number one,

and it works from the outside in. The Patriots are the only offense where the number one starts from, you work from the inside out. It's a dink and dunk type out which is extremely effective especially with that type of quarterback they have at the helm. Do you think it's overstated? Because obviously you guys should have played better. I was just busting your balls.

I don't think it was after that. But do you think that it's overstated that so many veterans come in and have a hard time? Do you think it's not that hard? It's not only having a hard time, it's just those veterans that are coming in are outside receivers, and they understand that it's not going to be the same. When Reggie Wayne went there, what did he do?

How many days did he last? Two? Yeah, not long. Not that any because he's on the sheet? I didn't even know. Oh, yeah. He came and had a quick cup of coffee and said, you know what? I'm out.

Eric Decker got there. How long did he last? It was Decker. I think a week. I think Torrey Holt came in for a little bit. Yeah, and it's a great system, but it's just not for certain types of wide receivers, including myself. Now, Randy Moss is special.

He's a special gifted human specimen, and when you can go that way and all Tom has to do is throw it, it works. But, you know, it's more predicated to tight ends that are extremely agile, as Aaron Hernandez was. Gronk, as you see the running backs in the slot edelman west welker you get where i'm going with this yeah yeah yeah white burke had this so yeah and so if the only outside receiver that you can name that was dominant the way others are dominant on you know other teams is and he'd be dominant wherever he goes no No matter what system, no matter what planet. The Raiders in Tennessee didn't use him until he got to New England.

It was a different ballgame, and that's what he's capable of doing. For sure. What do you think you had a more hard time with, the Patriots system or the Foxtrot? Neither. I mean, the Foxtrot. Don't sit here and tell me you didn't have trouble with the Fox Trot. No, this is the thing.

People always say the Patriots system. The game of football, it's only nine routes, one to nine. When you go from team to team, the only thing that changes is the verbiage. Everything stays the same. So it's all about basically reading a book and understanding the book. But for me, it took me time to get used to a new book after being a decade somewhere else. Yeah, of course.

You know, so you get thrown into the fire and Tom and Bill command perfection right away. And it's just something I wasn't able to do. I never got comfortable with the system, but the playbook doesn't change. It's all the same, you know, it's just worded differently. That foxtrot though, man, that foxtrot. I'm a great dancer. I used to strip back in 92. Yeah. same you know just though it's just worded differently that's my man that Get your dollars ready, ladies. No, you guys are laughing.

I did strip when I was in junior college. Did you really? You went to Channing Tatum route, huh? Yeah, I didn't have a choice. I mean, how else was I going to feed myself? I had no money. What was your song? Well, there was no specific song.

You didn't have a go-to? No, I could really dance to anything. Look at you. Did you have moves? Did you have, like, moves? Like, did you have, like, a specific, like, all right, I'm about to whip the mandingo out and do something with it? The whole thing, the key is back then, this is 1997, the whole thing, to make the most money, you want to dance for the healthy women. You get what I'm saying? Yes, sir.

I understand. I understand where you're going. There we go. Hey, they tip extremely well. How long did you do this for? Yeah, you should. Yeah, you should, man. Why they tip extremely well. How long did you do this for? Yeah, you should. Yeah, you should, man. Why am I telling this?

How long did you do it for? This was two years, 97, 98. I definitely did it my 98th year because I was ineligible to play at Santa Monica, and I had no income, no financial aid, no nothing. You're not violating any amateur status or anything when you're stripping? Not at all. Well, so they recently kind of lightened up on the celebration dance rules, right? I feel like if you're in the league right now,

and now maybe you would whip out some Mandingo moves, I don't know. What would be your go-to now under the new rules? It wouldn't be any different because I didn't follow the rules back then. See, I actually made the argument last year. I think last year was the first year it was in play, right? Right. You could have the choreographed dance. I mean, your shit was way better than that.

I hate the whole team choreography. I'm too forced. The stuff I did was authentic. Exactly. It was authentic. It wasn't scripted. It was, you know, I see something on TV. Okay, I'm doing that.

You know, the Tiger Woods putt, he had just won a major that Saturday. So Sunday, what did I do? I went and did it. The marriage proposal, a friend of mine had got married. I just mocked the proposal. My favorite one that I didn't get to do, remember, you know, Staples. They have Staples in New York? Yeah. You remember the easy button that first came out and it said, when you hit it, it says,

that was easy? I put an easy button under the north and south end zone. No. Yes, against the Kansas City Chiefs. That would have been so cocky. But I tried to score so bad, and Carson kept feeding me the ball. Yeah. But I just couldn't get an end zone. And I was going to grab it from under the goal post and have him press it.

And that was easy. I think that would have been my favorite one. Absolutely. It was only that one game that you tried to do it? You couldn't? Yeah, that's the only one I ever have. Bro, you have to come back and play for the Patriots just to try to get that done that would be the greatest of all time forget about the sharpie forget to cut me it'd be worth it it would be worth it be like check your jersey

off hand it to bill be like i'm out of here but i went out on top how did you and bill's relationship get started like i know you kind of famously got popular extremely it was a he was a big fan of mine as a player having to deal with me defensively from a defensive standpoint. I was held to deal with. And that's where the relationship came about. You know, being there was a different scenario because the way the offense is built, you know, it was only so much I could do.

That's still one of the hard knocks highlights, just you yelling, Bill! From the sideline. I always used to do that. Y'all saw the documentary where they did on me where I would tell the DBs my route at the line of scrimmage. So when we

played the Patriots, I would yell for Bill before the snap of the ball and do like this. I'd say, watch this. I'd tell Bill to watch this route. I did it to Marvin, too. I played with such an extreme confidence. It was ridiculous. It was just fun. I just had fun like a little kid.

What was he like dealing with as a kid? Because he seemed like a handful as an adult. He still is a kid. Unfortunately, I didn't have to deal with him. All the other coaches on the park had to deal with it. I feel like this FIFA thing and video games is a whole new world that I feel like you're kind of right in the mix with everybody. You've been on this forever. Yeah.

Before it was even really popping. It was like you were stripping and playing FIFA, it feels like. Holy shit, yeah. Now that you put it like that. It's wild to watch how much it's become a viable career. I mean, you could be... When people say it's going to overtake the NFL or these guys are athletes in their own right,

having played professionally and now you really enjoy it, do you get that or are you kind of like, that's ridiculous, it's not? It's there. These gamers make six figures no different than third four string player and a lot a lot easier right yeah a lot easier no wear and tear how was the uh the documentary process like you who you know you running the show is 50 50 how does that all shake out well i mean the thing is uh you know we

we started out, the guys who I'm doing, who I did the documentary with, one of the guys named Evan, they did the You documentary, 30 for 31. Oh, yeah. One of the best. One of the greatest. Yeah, so we linked up from there, from that point. Evan went to another company

and after he went to that company, we did a documentary and we just thought we needed to have more with the program, you know, because it's so rich with football and so rich with, you know, from the community aspect, you know, and got with LeBron James and Maverick Carter. That's a good one to link up with. Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

So, I mean, you know, him and his deals and stuff and his business, we ended up, you know, getting the deal done and shot the documentary, docuseries, and, you know, we're just happy about it. I mean, it's not like your average sports docuseries. I mean, it goes in-depth into the lives of the kids as well as the parents. It's almost like you're a fly on the wall in a house where you see one of the top football players, how he came up, other than how you normally see these docuseries.

What do you think about it? Like, what is it at Miami? I mean, as far as, like, there's so much rap and music history, so much football and athletes going on. Like, is that just because it's beautiful South Beach and it all? Like, what about Miami makes it that, like, that hub for everything? You know, I look at it, it's no different than Chinese gymnastics. Okay.

I mean, the kids started at four years old playing very competitive football at a very high level. The demands are very high. I mean, you know, grandma could be on the fence saying, Coach, you ain't coaching them hard enough. You know what I'm saying? And then, you know, it's a rite of passage. And that's why, you know, in Miami we have the best football players in the world.

You know, and that's where they come from, unfortunately. The coaching is chastised. The way we're coached is chastised. But it brings the best out of the kids. And it toughens you up mentally. In today's era, everybody's so sensitive. And I think about, I could just imagine them, can you imagine them being coached by the,

or just growing up in that era, just that area in general, you know? You ever saw the year of the bull? No. You never saw that? Just listen to, just the way the kids are coached, man, it's perfect. That's how it should be.

And I don't want to say too much about the series, but you're going to like it. Yeah, man. When I think of the word authentic, authentic and raw is the best way to describe it. Authenticity is the best thing you can have on that one. Which a lot of people don't have. No. Very few. In this docu-series.

And even if you do have it, I mean, people are afraid to say it. They're afraid to tell it like it is. Put it out there like it is. Everybody is politically correct. Absolutely. Yeah, we make sure with this docu-series that it's being told the right way. Just hardcore, raw, uncut.

And you're going to get the question that you just asked me, you'll get that answer. Like, in every me, you'll get that answer. Like in every episode, you'll get that answer. You'll know why South Florida football is better than any football in the world. All right, well, it premieres. The team of Texas aren't going to like hearing this. No. I don't care about them people in Texas.

They got stiff hips. I mean, they got stiff hips in Georgia. They're just big, and they can't move. They don't move like this. I mean, they got Steph Hibson in Georgia. They're just big, and they can't move. They don't move like this, man. I mean, we got dancers. You got a stripper who just happened to be able to play football. No, but I'm telling you, I mean, our teams in South Florida, we go around the country playing people.

Like, you know, you'll have Northwestern or Central or any school in Dade County. They'll come up here and play Bishop Goldman. Beat the dog shit out of them. Was that kid? We go all over the country to beat people. I mean, I don't know who does these rankings, but they rank these guys, and then we go play them and beat them, and it's like, shit. Was that kid who just went crazy viral playing the flag football,

who could just move all over the place? I feel like he was a Miami kid. I know he he was just working out you know the video i'm talking about no this kid he's got dreads and he i mean he's lightning fast i forget if he was just working out with the dolphins or with um the bucks i know it was a south florida team but it reminds me of myself when i was younger well what's more important to you football or music you sound like a football guy more than have a music background. Hey, hey, listen. In Miami, when you grow up in Miami, it's football first.

All right. That's a rite of passage. You do football. But I'm football first. Music is my way of living. Music pays the bills, but your heart's with football. That must be nice to do living so well that you get hobby first. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now my hobby comes first on this one. That's how you play your hearts with football. That must be nice to do, living so well that you get hobby first. Yeah.

Now my hobby comes first on this one. That's how you know you succeeded, man. And that was the whole thing. I mean, I always said once I get a couple dollars over my lunch money, I'll start a football program in my neighborhood. And who would have thought 29 years later we'd get ready to debut on Stars. That's wild. And, you know, we got guys like Chad came out of the program,

Devontae Freeman, Duke Johnson, Devontae Davis, Kerry Williams. I mean, it's a lot of kids that came through the program. So, I mean, it's a great thing. You got to tune in. September 16th. It's 8 p.m. It is

Stars app. Stars app, September 9th you can watch it early see you early alright well we appreciate you guys coming through I believe Chad's going to go out there

and get whipped into FIFA is that what's about to happen you mean lose I don't lose Chad's going to beat everybody ass in this office

anybody that's listening you can get it you can get it I got my man right here. Ocho is for the Kitsa man. Ocho Man Diego. There ain't gonna be no damn dancing up in this piece. All right.

Well, we appreciate it, fellas. Thank you so much for coming through. Cool.