KFC Radio - Machine Gun Kelly, Logan Paul, & Top 5 Ways to Consume Potatoes

Episode Date: May 12, 2020

Don't forget to subscribe, rate five stars, and leave a review! We kick off the episode discussing how Roger Goodell is going to try and get out of watching Monday Night Football with Dave. We talk about how John Krasinski is dominating the content game with Some Good News right now. Today's Top Five Tuesday is "Ways to Consume Potatoes". Make sure to vote for who you think won Top Five Tuesday @kfcradio on twitter. Feits shares a prediction about his life that was printed in the paper on the day he was born. Voicemails include: Celebrity Notes App, the curious finger, and dehydration meters. Machine Gun Kelly joins the show. We discuss his incredible versatility as a performer including his newest venture into punk rock. He updates us on his feud he's had with his neighbors and much more. Logan Paul returns to the show. We discuss how he's gotten back into doing crazy stuff for the vlog since quarantine. His dad pops in and shares a wild story about how he saved Logan's ranch from burning down. We talk about Logan's push to get into acting more in feature films and the preparations he took get ready for his role. Let us know what you think @kfcradio @kfcbarstool @feitsbarstool @loganpaul @machinegunkellyYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's another edition of KFC Radio on the Barstool Sports Network. We got a monster episode for you today. Two very good interviews with our boy Logan Paul and Machine Gun Kelly, who I think me and Fights are now both just like fangirls over. I mean... Huge, huge huge fan i just

found plastic in my hair like we were just saying off off air how me and him are just starting to look alike and how we kind of look like mose from the office and like it's it's i don't know if it's good or bad but it's something you're like a monkey yeah yeah it's good or bad, but it's something. It's not good when you find it. You're like a monkey. Yeah. It's like, ah, fuck, I just dropped it. It's just like a little black bead. Like, I don't know where the hell I could have come from, but I just have trash in my hair. This is getting weird, man.

Weird. As one of the four living members of the Brady Four, the Goodell saga took its greatest plot twist yet. Dave is the winner. I love you saying it like that. One of the four living members. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Like one of the four surviving members of the Brady Four. You're going to say that for like another 60 years. You guys are all going to live for a long-ass time. Surviving members of the Brady Four. Where you being closer to this saga than probably anybody else other than Dave, what percentage do you put this at that it happens? Zero. Really?

Zero. Zero. And unless someone smart gets in Goodell's ear, because he's not going to realize that fucking the worst thing for this, for Dave, I think personally, Dave might disagree. I think the worst thing for Dave is that this happens. Like, best case scenario, it gets canceled. Because worst thing that happens, like, if it happens and Dave shows up and, like, berates the guy for three hours, you kind of come out looking like an asshole.

Yeah, I agree. Right? I agree, but Dave is the best, literally the best debater I've ever seen. And he's going to do his homework. And when we were talking on the rundown, he was talking – he's like, forget about deflating. I'm talking Ray Rice. I'm talking Greg Hardy. Like the real bad shit that Goodell has done where it's like even if Dave berates you for four hours, it's tough to take the side of a guy who was basically shielding domestic abusers.

Right, right. It's just true. If Dave goes in calmly, that won't be allowed. Even if Dave is allowed there, I would be shocked to find that there's not some clause like you can't turn it

into a live stream, you can't turn it into a recording stream. Dave thinks he's going to be able to have his phone on. What's that? Dave thinks he's going to be able to – these are the wild things that go on in Dave's brains. He was like, they're just going to let me have my phone. I'll just film on my phone. It's like they're just not going to let you do that, dude. No, they'll – that would be like – there's no – I don't know.

I just think there's no way they allow that. Even a phone – like a Chappelle show. Like, you got to leave your phone out here or something like that. There's little things they can do that aren't crazy. Like, that can't be like, what a police state where it's just like, you won a three-hour session with a commissioner. You didn't win an 80,000 person live stream. Right.

I mean, so the NFL, he had a little birdie tell him that the NFL has like a Treadstone Jason Bourne dossier on him. He was like, what else could there be?

And I was like, I don't know, Dave. You tell me, bro. Are you walking into like a town? What if he gets in there and Goodell just has like this fucking layout? Like everyone has something, right? Like I don't even know. Like I would be asking the same question. I'd be like, I don't know what they have on me.

But I'd get in there and there would be shit I didn't want them to have on me. Exactly. And Dave's like pretty much an open book. But you're telling me there's things that Dave Borden doesn't want the world knowing? I mean the scariest thing I think out of all scenarios would be that day, Roger Goodell being like, come on in. Bring your people. Have a seat, Daveave i can't wait but i guess i guess the difference is i had

more faith in goodell as like uh like i guess he really is that big of an egomaniac and that big of like a misfit that i figured he would be like listen i acted i acted on my deflate gate news and then i couldn't go back on it because I thought I would look like a pussy. Sorry. You know, I just be like an honest dude about it. And then people would be like,

okay. And I did kind of forget about how bad the domestic abuse shit was. If Dave just keeps going in on him for that. But I thought that like, let him in your house, just be a normal dude. No, one's going to die.

Worst case scenarios, you lose your 40 million, you know, you already have enough money for days. Just do this. But I guess everything that even people in the league and all around the world have said is that he just lacks the ability to even do that. So if that's the case – I've heard from people who are close to him that he's kind of funny.

That he's like actually a funny good dude, which is why I was thinking that worst case scenario. And by like – I mean it's like fucking five people have told that you know it's not like uh everyone i talked to him like hey what's good oh like people like he's pretty fucking normal and that's what i was like if he just goes in and it's like hey dave pleasure to meet you blah blah blah and dave keeps being like fuck you it's like like the bad guy and that's why the best case scenario for the nfl I think, is doing this and making sure you can't stream it or whatever. But the best case of the NFL is opening the door.

I think they won't. And then I think that will just take Dave to another level of – In Dave's mind, he's like, I've already won. Right. Because either they let me do this and I win or they back out and I win. And what I think the league should have done was call up American Express and be like, you guys have been a sponsor of ours for how long? Call this dude up. Tell him there was some fucking, you know, something wrong with the bidding process.

Someone actually bid $700,000. You weren't even close. And, you know, I don't know. But he said he would have gone to the moon. He's like, like, knowing that there was a bidding process, like, if it just kept going up, he was like, I would have gone unlimited. I would have never stopped. And it's smart. It's smart.

It's going to work out for him. It's going to be the best case scenario. Does he get to bring people with him? By the way, that was the weirdest fucking auction where it was like, one, Goodell, watch a game with Goodell in the basement to, you get two tickets to a football game. Like, dude, I just bet $250,000 to watch Monday night football.

I'll get my own fucking tickets. Who is the other person bidding like 249,000? Who the fuck has that interest in watching a game with that robot? Fuck that guy. Who would you pay money for? We were talking about CCK. Under the guise of charity, which that's all that is. It's under the guise of charity.

We're not doing this because of charity. Dave's doing this for content. Charity is a bonus. If you had unlimited money, would you pay for any money? No. We talked about that before with what my mom used to say as a kid when I couldn't wait in line for things. She's like, I wouldn't wait in line for Jesus. And that's kind of stuck in my head.

Because I just think if it's someone you actually want to hang out with, like someone you'd actually be interested in, like it just makes it weird. Yeah. Right? Like it just makes it very strange. Like I got, now I feel like Brady's Brady's had a pretty cool one where I think his was like 800 grand and it was like come to a game and this and that. And then you come to dinner and like, even then I'd be like, dude, you don't have to come to dinner. If you want to come love that, do it. But like, I'm, I'm freeing you of the need to come to dinner with me.

Yeah. I, I couldn't think of anybody. I said maybe for my kids, but even that, I don't think I would want them to like – to be a lesson that you can like buy your friends. So who are these fucking people? Dave said the main reason he thinks it won't happen, at least as is, is he says that they don't think that they'll give him his home address. And Dave was like, they give me his home address. I'm showing up with a fucking marching band. Could you imagine that? It's like, Marching down the front of Bronxville, New York. Hey, Roger, let's go.

And I was like, yeah, that's probably what they'll do is they'll change it to like a neutral site. And Dave gets that Grinch smirk on his face. He's like, they said I get to like a neutral site. And Dave's get that, he gets that, that Grinch smirk on his face. And he's like, they said, I get to sit in that seat. This is, this is like when the, the, the bad guy gets the nukes in 24.

Like, what do you do? There's no stopping them now. Well, because also if you don't let them do it, then you have to give them his money back. And therefore you get $250,000 for coronavirus. Right.

That's what I mean. Shouldn't, shouldn't Roger just be like, I'll put a million of my own dollars up to end this? I'm giving the money to charity and I don't have to deal with this asshole. It's the worst, man. He's in such a no-win position. There's nothing you can do. Again, aside from just being completely normal and like disarming dave with normalcy which it's up in the air whether or not he's capable of that but there's nothing you can do

there's nothing dave has you dave has you like in what it's like um when you see i think i think barcelona doris tweeted a video of it the other day where it's like a snake eating a frog, and the frog's half in its mouth, and he's trying to get away, and then eventually he's like, he realizes it's over. There's nothing this snake has eaten me. And Dave Portman has eaten Roger Goodell. That's why I think it'll point towards him doing it.

I think when you sit down with your team, and you've run through every scenario, and they are like, dude, literally best case scenario is you're doing it like what are you so afraid of what's gonna i don't i don't think i don't think people think like that i don't think they're as smart as us in this particular situation right i don't think they realize the benefit of just being normal again if he's capable right and just like just holding up be kind of the kind of the rude guy in the situation

you can be like look I invited you into my home I share I put up my time for COVID response blah blah blah blah blah blah and it's like again Dave is very good at this so Dave might be able to do it without being an asshole or he might just go all the way in

and be like I don't care if I'm coming off as an asshole but it's a, it's a more difficult dance for Dave to do. Yeah. If Roger just sits down, he's like, let's go. It is.

That's that, that puts all the pressure on Dave, allowing it to happen, puts all the pressure on Dave. I, and I, why I, I still think he's fucked is because I think Dave rises to the occasion

every time. Right. You're fucked, Roger. You're fucked. We're going to get into our voicemails. We'll get into our interviews with MGK and Logan Paul. But first, Tuesday Top 5. So brought to you by our friends over at Miller Lite.

It's the only thing keeping us going here in quarantine is cracking open some ice cold Miller L. Every time we're listening to the podcast, recording the podcast, binging, uh, the last dance. Anytime we are doing anything, uh, Miller light is, is helping us get through this tough time. Um, so whether or not, you know, you're lucky enough to be back out there in the world. If you're opening up, whether you're still stuck in quarantine, make you open up a nice cold miller light brewed in milwaukee wisconsin it's only 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces and brewed in milwaukee uh where you can celebrate responsibly and when you're home enjoy a classic it's available for delivery today so you can get it sent right to your front door you don't have to go out you don't have to break the rules leaves it on your front step like a fucking like a stork delivering a baby just dropping that beer

off at your house you crack open a cold one every time you listen to us whether we're putting out our top fives whether we're doing our voicemails it's always us hanging out with you guys and connecting with the listeners over a beer so crack open a Miller Lite for KFC radio uh top five today is by the way you probably you sure you haven't heard it, but you were under the weather yesterday. First of all, I hope you're feeling better. And everyone else in CCK was MIA. So I got a call probably like 9 o'clock last night from B Clance. Uh-huh.

Fucking calling in the righty. Had to come in and do an ad read for Miller Lite. And you got who showed up for it, would you? You knew it was going to happen. you knew it was gonna happen you knew it was gonna happen oh who i was listening to cck yesterday on the kfc radio feed just heard a bunch of kevin and jared and casey and then an irish john do do a miller light ad read i love it i love it it's the best. It's the best scarcely used joke. You know, like we use it just the right amount of time.

And it's so funny every fucking time. And I didn't even go into it. I went into it trying to do it real. Like I was just doing an ad read me. And I was like, I can't, I can't do this. And I just, I switched it up. First take. Bam.

Wait, before we do top fives how good was uh krasinski he he's just the fucking shining star of of uh quarantine it's as soon as i saw that some good news i was like fuck he's gonna crush it some good news got me mad because it was like that's a good idea i know i really think that he when it's all said and done, will be like the most likable person in Hollywood. It's disgusting how likable he is. Yeah. He's up there with everybody else. Like, I bet you can't get a bad word about him.

They went all out. All right, this might sound bad. That couple, they were just like, were fans of The Office? Like nobody would think they were dying of cancer or something like that? They also seemed underwhelmed. I don't think they were grateful enough. Right. They were like, oh, my God.

And I was like, are you guys super fans? And then I was like, you know, not to like, I know it's tough. You're going to get married in quarantine, and that stinks. But I was like, are you guys super fans? And then I was like, you know, not to like – I know it's tough. You're going to get married in quarantine, and that stinks. But I was like, when are you sick? Did something happen to your kids? Like why are you getting this grand-ass treatment here? This is the best ever. Dude, that's such a hard position for them to be in, though.

I've always thought about that when I was a kid, and you had to call like radio stations to win tickets. I'd be like, okay, thanks. If they were like, you're the to win tickets, I'd be like, okay, thanks. If they were like, you're the 17th caller, I'd be like, okay, thank you. I wouldn't be able to muster up that fake enthusiasm. The worst part of that thing would be listening to the Zac Brown song that nobody knows yet. That was a new song.

What Zac Brown song? He also before – this is why I did a video on it too i don't even think the world was doing a good enough job of recapping what krasinski did because he got all the families involved then he had zach brown show up and play a brand new song for the father to walk the bride down the aisle and then they did yeah i mean he went all out i just saw the office part but i i i was like what do you do when someone's like, this is a new song, it's coming out, and then for the next four minutes, I'm just going to sit here playing

and you don't even know any fucking words or anything. You're at a concert. You're at a very intimate concert with a song you've never heard of. Just play Chicken Fried! Just play Chicken Fried! But yeah, that was, I mean, he is on top of the fucking world, man.

At the very beginning of it, Emily Blunt starts it. She does – she, like, spins around in the chair, hits the papers, and he's like, I am John Krasinski. And he, like, drops – he, like, pops his head and he's like, what are you doing, Emily? It's like it's perfect. I'm like, you guys are fucking perfect. God damn it. They are crushing it.

So shout out to them. It's an idea that we all should have had. Let's get into top five ways to eat potatoes. And I think it's perfect for the way we look right now because I think we should both be like farming potatoes in Ireland. Oh, look at these fucking hands. These are digging for potatoes. Those things are – you would have picked so many potatoes back in the day. Holy shit.

I never stubbed a finger in my whole life. They're just fucking low-centered gravity on these things. Everybody else is jamming their finger on the basketball. John's popping the ball. Never. Never once have I been like, ah, I jammed my finger there. No. I call it stubbed.

I haven't stubbed my finger. Because they're just stubs already. You can't stub a stub. That's funny all right um who has first pick you mashed potatoes done mashed potatoes and i already won i don't even i might forego my next four picks mashed potatoes forever king of the castle top of the mountain number one overall pick gold medal mashed potatoes are the premier way to consume potatoes end of discussion end of debate that's it vodka vodka it got me there that was a critical comeback shit this this

one we haven't done any research for we just thought of this one vodka is a little fucking russian potato vodka i don't understand how you make potatoes vodka, by the way. To me, it sounds like a lie. I don't even believe. What are you talking about, potato vodka? That doesn't make any sense to me at all. How does any of the alcohol come about? Grapes become wine, potatoes. I don't think anything turns into alcohol if you just leave it outside for a while.

That's how I think alcohol is made. It's just like, hey, make this in liquid form and just leave it in a barrel for a while. And then it becomes a poison and you can drink it. Like you could have alcohol blood. If I just fucking gave myself a cut, put it in a barrel, and just sat it outside this garage right now, that would definitely get you fucked up. All right. My second pick i'm gonna have to go with

the uh the waffle fry boo oh yeah that's the answer oh no no no no no the waffle fry is is the answer. Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no. The waffle fry is the unsung hero of fries. I'm not going to go with just straight McDonald's fries. I want to go with something that's like a little bit of a delicacy. When they're cooked to crispy perfection and while you have buffalo wings and you can dip it in the buffalo sauce and the blue cheese, it almost becomes its own – it's not even a French fry to me. It's almost like when I made the waffle-o sandwich down in Atlantic City and I just had the waffle fry be the bread on top of the buffalo

chicken sandwich. It becomes a whole other food to me. I don't even think of it as a French fry. So the waffle fry is almost like a, it's like a latke, like a potato latke. I'm going with a Jewish answer here almost because the waffle fry is such a different consistency to other French fries. The only waffle fry I'll ever even entertain is the Chick-fil-A waffle fry, and I'll dip that in a Polynesian sauce a couple of times. But aside from that, no, not for me. What do you got? I forget if these are the same thing, but I'm going to go with potatoes au gratin or scallop potatoes.

I think they're the same. What's up? Anytime I've ever had them, they're sloppy. Yeah, that's why they're good. I like it nice and fucking sloppy. I like my potatoes like I like my porn. Jesus Christ. It's like a potato au gratin or a potato, a scallop potato.

Again, I think these are the same thing, just different words. I'm not positive. That's like – you know you're classing it up like a fucking a waffle fry that's some fucking elementary school shit these things they're always served over like bunsen burners or whatever they're called they're in a metal fucking thing with a fire below it you got a big nice silver spoon you know it's christmas or it's thanksgiving or someone's dead probably that's where you're fucking getting these kind of potatoes. It's one of those things I'm still even though I know it's au gratin

when the time comes for me to order it, I'm like potatoes au gratin? No idea how to say it. I know how to say it, but I don't know how to say it. I always joke. I feel like every time au gratin makes you feel uncultured. There's no way that's how it's pronounced.

It can't be au gratin. It's got to be like au gratin or something like that. I'm the uncultured. You're like, there's no way this is how it's pronounced. It can't be pronounced on fire. It's got to be like a guatán or something like that. And I'm the uncultured swine here, but I always choke when it comes time to order it. Absolutely great call. It's a total panic. In fact, I'll be like, and I'll dig the potatoes, and I point to it.

Right. So I don't have to say. Floppy sex potato, please. Okay. I'm going to go with the twice-baked potato with the sour cream, the bacon bits, the cheddar cheese, the chives. That is a – that's another all-time classic that I think when you do it right... When you... When the world of potato skins opens up to you, and you realize

you can just eat those motherfuckers too, you don't have to scoop it all out, you can just eat the whole goddamn thing, then the whole baked potato becomes this delicacy, it's amazing. That's my third pick. Fuck, okay. I don't know what this one's called. Probably should have done research for this.

It's not hash browns, but it's a breakfast thing. Where it's like... It's like skinny pieces of potato. Well, okay. So there's hash browns, then there's like home fries? No, it's not home fries. There's peppers and onions in it and shit?

No. Fuck. If I don't know how to pronounce this, I can't have it. That's the rules. Those are the rules. Everybody knows that. Breakfast potatoes. I mean, home fries are good. Potato latkes? It might be latkes.

You have it with breakfast? Yeah, but I don't regularly. It's rare. They're very thin. It almost looks like shaved potatoes. It's not a potato pancake. Fuck it.

I'm skipping it. I'm just going to go potato chips. Oh, shit. What a horrible oversight by me. That would have been my number one pick. Oh, my God. I clearly have some mental block when it comes to chips. Tortillas, potatoes.

I don't know what these things are fucking made out of. Oh, my God. That's devastating. And if I can specify, baked lays. I love a baked lays. It's a half bag. It's bullshit. They're running a real racket with the baked lays company. a baked lay far superior to the actual chip no yeah no

no baked is like you're eating communion chips no there's so much better dude it's they're not even close there's so much better for one eating but even more important that too they're better so much better for putting on sandwiches you You get like two baked ladies, you cover a whole sandwich. It's beautiful. I don't put chips on my sandwich. I bite and bite, bite and bite. No, I don't remember. I got into cooking sandwiches for a little while at the start of quarantine, making sandwiches all the time.

Great sandwich maker. And then I would always put the chip on there. But I don't go out of my way. It's got to be – all the ingredients got to be right there. All right, my fourth pick. Can I go with just regular hash brown then? Sure. Yeah, all right, because I want to have potato for breakfast as well.

And I think this is definitely low brow, like trash of me. But I think like the Dunkin' Donuts type or like the McDonald's type that's just like shaped like a fucking hockey rink. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Those ones are really good. Those are kind of what I was talking about. But they're on a plate rather than – they're not as packed as like – like you couldn't hold one. Right. It's like they're almost as packed. You couldn't hold one. Right. It would flop over. Right.

They're almost individual. It's all very thin potato. Someone's going to know what I'm talking about, and they're going to know they're delicious. Number four, I'm going to go straight. I'm going to go baked sweet potato. I like sweet potato. I like my carbs complex son I'm actually I'm a

Like a late bloomer when it comes to sweet potato fries I've like only recently Discovered them and I love them Love them Sweet potato is so far superior Both in health and in taste Sweet potato I leave that last I get a baked sweet potato with steak

or whatever dinner I'm getting. I always eat that last and then that's my dessert because it's fucking delicious. Just enough for the sweet tooth we can go like, alright, this is dessert. You ever get a sweet potato with like a syrup dipping sauce? Yeah. That is actually like a full-blown dessert.

Right. Some people put like cinnamon on it too. Cinnamon, maybe a little syrup. people put cinnamon on it, too. Cinnamon, maybe a little syrup. It's candy. I think that's why they're called candied yams. Yeah, but those are basically the same shit.

I think I'm grabbing a fucking steal with my fifth and final pick of the McDonald's french fry. Yeah, I mean, I'm not a fry guy. I mean, fries are... I've forever been in the camp. I knew we had to hire Tyler when he had...

He started his... I follow Tyler on Twitter. I've started following Tyler on Twitter just because, like, when I was following Coley, Coley was just... It was all Tyler retweets. It was like... Coley didn't even tweet. I was just like, this dude is fuckingley, it was all Tyler retweets. Coley didn't even tweet us. This dude is fucking hilarious. I followed Tyler and then shortly thereafter he started a blog

and I forget what it was called. It was like staring up at your bedroom ceiling or something like that and he would have some fucking hilarious blogs but the one that I was like, this is unbelievable was like, fuck Fred Fries. He was like, he was unbelievable. It was like, fuck, fuck Fred Fries. And he was like, he was talking about how if Fred Fries is so good,

then why do they just give him away? Like everywhere you go, it's just like fucking heaps of fries. He's like, what is it? Like, oh, you bought a cheeseburger? Here's some fries. Oh, you came into our store? Here's some fries. Oh, your mama got tuberculosis?

Here's some fries. And it was like, I was like, you're so right. He perfectly encapsulated what I'd always been thinking about fries. It was Thursday, one of my favorite blog posts ever. I won't go out of my way. I won't be like, fuck your fries. But I will very regularly

not get a meal and I'll just get a side cheeseburger for a dollar. I do that as well, but I think you kind of answered your own question. It's like the reason why America is obese, the reason why we are fat slobs, the reason why McDonald's is worth trillions is because of that crispy golden fry. And when they get it right, man, when they get it right, it's unstoppable. And the value I'm getting there with my fifth-round pick,

I knew you weren't a fry guy, so I knew I was going to be able to pick it up late. But, I mean, you're not taking any fries? No, I got no fries. What about tater tots? You're going to take tater tots? I felt bad leaving that on the table. That would have been my other choice. I might, if I could go back, I would maybe – I kind of panicked with the waffle fry.

I probably should have gone tater there. I might take a tater, but – oh, God, this is a tough one. I don't – tater would be – it would be disingenuous for me to get – to choose it. But a tater is delicious, like a loaded tater. Like when you get the appetizer where it's like you got to eat it with a fork. You can't eat – yeah. So loaded potato, loaded tater tots that you have to eat with a fork. I don't want to be picking like fucking –

I want that shit to be so heavy and so weighed down with sour cream and cheese and fucking bacon bits that picking up with my fingers is just off the table. It's an impossible feat that I could never accomplish. I'm going to throw in a caveat that with my McDonald's fries, I will be cooking them disco style with the mayonnaise, which is with cheese fries with gravy, and then I do mayonnaise and ketchup. Oh, change my answer, change my answer, change my answer. No, no, no, no, no, no.

You were locked in. You were locked in. You were locked in. Fifth answer locked in. You were locked in. Fifth answer has changed. No. Off the board. Poutine. Winner.

No, no. Dude, poutine's so good. It's definitely poutine. I want poutine. Give me poutine. Poutine. Judge is ruling. You can give the man his poutine.

He can have it. I'm going to start kicking my feet. No, no, no! Alright, that's it for our top fives. Tweet at us and vote on who won this week's top five, and then I'll decide who goes first on Am I the Asshole?

Johnny is living at home, took a stroll down memory lane, woke up some sort of time capsule, as I understand it. It was, no. It was like, my mom was getting, I don't know, something refurbished because we're moving and they want to put it in a new house

and shit like that, and so we had to empty this fucking thing. I guess, yeah, technically kind of a time capsule. It was this fucking, I think she called it a secretary's desk, but no one's going to be able to picture what the fuck that is. I actually know exactly what that is. You do? Yes.

Okay, so it was a secretary's desk, and it was just sitting in our garage. It hadn't been open in forever, so we were just kind of emptying it out and looking at things as we go through it. And my mom saved the – I guess it was in the paper the day i was born and it was kind of like uh fortune telling i guess so it was this uh i guess it's like it's just something in the in the newspaper for all kids born that day it's like these this is going to be your future for every single child born that day in the town i live in which is fairly sizable. But the everyone else seemed to think that it sounded exactly like me. I disagree. I don't think it does.

Okay, let's go. Okay. The headline is, those born today make opportunities. Not sounding a lot like me. Born today, you are a strong, vibrant, hearty individual.

You are always determined to get the most out of life, especially when the odds are against you. You have a way of making opportunities for yourself, and indeed, your greatest achievements will likely be of your own making. You enjoy having the money to do what you want when you want to, but you are not so money-minded that you will work yourself into the ground. On the contrary, you enjoy taking time off as often as possible. You have been endowed with the gift of gab, and you are rarely at a loss for words in social situations. Indeed, you know how to work yourself into the center of virtually any conversation. This can

be irritating to others at times, and no doubt will give you a colorful reputation. I mean, in the beginning, I was like, do your friends and family know you at all? But we picked up steam. We hit our stride there. I think like six out of seven things were you there, babe.

It was. But like in social situations, I'm not known as a gabber. On podcast, sure. But in the show, you are. Not with strangers, but if you're amongst friends, you're the one chopping it up. I guess that's true. Yeah. I just like how it's like,

this can be, what's it say? Irritating or something. This will be irritating to others. I love that. Like halfway through that, it's like, Oh wow,

guys, you really think this sounds a lot like me? And then you get to the irritating part. You're fuck guys come on that was the one part where i was like yeah all right that one would make sense everything else is like you work hard and you strive for greatness and you create your own opportunities but that doesn't sound like me and it's like but you can be annoying like okay i see it i see it well i think when it's all said and done this whole barstool thing will be considered making your own opportunity but yeah i don't think anybody's nobody's really thinking of us as like the go-getters.

We can't be us. What would yours have said? Oh, my God. I have no fucking idea. About me? Yeah. I can't just say – I don't know. I'll have to.

I'll come up with something for Thursday's episode. I'll see if I can actually find that. I bet you that's a thing that you can track down for whatever they are, horoscopes or whatever. I'll try to find mine. If not, I'll write a little something. It's not going to be good, though. I'll tell you that much. All right.

Let's get into voicemails now. Voicemails today are brought to you by Jackpocket. Now, without sports right now, there aren't many ways to win money, and that's where Jackpocket comes in with their lottery app. Jackpocket lets you play Mega Millions, Powerball, and tons of other official state lottery games right on your phone. You don't want to risk going outside. You don't want to risk going to the convenience store.

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Just stupid. Dumb friend. He genuinely thought it too, though. Thought we won 700 grand on a scratch off. Dude. Honestly, those like,

it was probably 17. I, it's one of the more vivid memories of my entire life. Yeah. That's gotta be the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. We were watching, uh, I don't remember what year it was.

We were watching Pat Seahawks. We were at a house in Southie. We were watching, I don't remember what year it was. We were watching Pat Seahawks. We were at a house in Southie. We were like crying, hugging each other. And like if you, there were probably like 40 of us. I mean, not that many, but there were a lot of us there. So when you broke it down, we probably weren't even getting that much money. So it's like 700 grand cut in half right away for taxes. It's 350.

We probably would have like 50 grand each, which is a good amount of money, no doubt. But we were acting like it was life-changing. It was the most fucking fun I've had. And then how did you realize it was wrong? Did he realize it or did someone else look at it and be like, no? One other person picked up the ticket.

Just looked at it. Just one single new set of eyes. Nope, absolutely not aware. I wouldn't even want to be that person. I would have just been like, yep, someone else look at this. It was almost like a second wave, though, where it was really fun again. Right. You fucking idiot!

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I was just listening to one of your recent podcasts talking about John being an author and all of his terrible notes on his notes app. I want to hear your big three about if you could see anyone's notes app. I know it's been done with text messages, but note that no one else is supposed to see your notes. It's almost like your diary or ideas you have. And you can see they're recently deleted as well. So whether it be – I like this because – I think there's a significant difference in notes and text messages.

So I like the – Do regular people keep notes? I don't know. Do people keep notes like – Yeah. Do you keep notes where it's something that would be funny to talk about on a show or is it just like the same way but i'm sure there are people who like have like little life epiphanies or when you're drunk you write things down or stuff like that what's funny is like the people i would want to see most are the people that would

be the last people i'd pick like like i would love to see how uh, like I know that like Jay-Z doesn't write rhymes. He just fucking goes. I know that Dave Chappelle doesn't probably sit there like crafting jokes. Jay-Z doesn't write, I feel like every rapper just says that. I, I, everything I've heard from like producers,

like they get in the studio with him and he just like goes outside for a little bit, like Bob knobs his head and then goes in the studio and just like rips a song. It's pretty fucking cool. Wasn't that the Lil Wayne thing too? Like Wayne, like a hundred mixtapes and then goes in the studio and just like rips a song it's pretty fucking cool wasn't that the lil wayne thing too like when he's like week yeah it's just like he has two tour buses and one's a studio and he just like jumped on that one whenever he feels like it that's the thing i think that you know the

the two people i that i know that about like for sure at least through legend it's jay-z and little wayne if they said about you know, fucking some schmo, I'd be like, oh, that's bullshit. But it does sound like those guys don't even write shit down. The producer 9th Wonder said that Jay-Z did the Blueprint album in a weekend. What? A weekend. If you look at that album, it's like H to the Izzo,

girls, girls, girls, takeover. Like it is a sick album to do in a weekend. It was wild. So I'm sure that shit is exaggerated. It's like with The Last Dance. I love the drama and the theater of it all. But I'm also just thinking, like, he was a dick sometimes in practice. And that was it. It wasn't, you know, like, the reason why they won is because he's great.

And the reason why, you know, like, I think some of the shit's being romanticized on... Dude, speaking of the last dance, someone had a tweet and, like, for some reason, like, light bulb went off in my head where I was like, oh, yeah, this is fucking dead on. They said the most important, the most impressive statistic of Michael Jordan's career, the most impressive thing Michael Jordan did in his career

was go 200 in double-A baseball after not playing baseball for a decade. I've never thought of that. I always thought of it as like a laughably bad run of sports and all that stuff. That's fucking amazing. I bet you if he just stayed the course, I don't think he was ever going to be like an all-star. But I think he could have made it to the bigs and be on a team as like the 25th guy or something like that that's what dino said right if you have 1500 abs you would have he would have made the bigs yeah i mean i just think he was that much of a fucking freak

that he you know and he was only i it's whatever it's it's obviously not comparable to michael jordan or anything like that but i remember it's probably about 10 years a little more a little more 12 years maybe since i I've played competitive baseball. And last year, we were at Fenway winter weekend. I probably haven't swung a bat or anything like that. I haven't gone to a cage, haven't done anything. And we were at Red Sox winter weekend at Foxwoods. And I was like, all right, I'll just jump in the lowest speed.

I forget what it was. I think it was like 60, but I don't know for sure. I'll just jump in the lowest speed, hit a few ropes, and then I'll move up because I forget what it was. I think it was like 60, but I don't know for sure. I'll just jump the lowest speed, hit a few ropes, and then I'll move up because I get my swimming back. I didn't put a single ball in play. Not one ball.

It's been about as long as Michael went without playing baseball. It's been about 10 years. It was a low cage for children. I was right on everything. Every single pitch was tipped straight back, but it was like, cage for children. And I was right on everything. Every single pitch was tipped straight back. But it was like you lose just enough of that, and it's like, okay, I'm done. I can't play baseball anymore.

Cannot do it, man. To get in there with people who have aspirations for making the bigs and people who are legitimately paid athletes, to go 200 is insane. Yeah, I mean, that must have been such a fucking mockery for some of those guys to just be like what the fuck what the fuck man did you see the clip of uh of mj getting griffey's signature i have i did not say i didn't watch last night um but i have seen that clip yeah i mean that clip is yeah i don't even know if that was i only saw one episode last night so i don't know i just saw it on twitter i mean for him he gets up and it's like

where's ken griffey at he like parks through the crowd interrupts the media like can i have your autograph oh baby that has got to be one of the cockiest moments of all time like how does griffey walk out of there not thinking like well i'm the greatest fucking ever like i think it's it's arguably the second greatest logo um featuring a person right the swing man yeah yeah yeah yeah swing man to jump man yeah i would think uh yeah i can't even think of any others yeah there might be only two logos that feature i think i can think of shack there's the shack the shack sneakers were hanging on the rim but those are so yeah swing man is because that was that was the thing it was like it wasn't just that he was good it was that he looked good doing it that's that's kind of what mj had uh i i said today on cck i think i'm out on the last dance because it makes me feel horrifically

insignificant i'm like well this is what life like could have been for some of us and we're just not even in the same stratosphere like i don't i disagree with that no one that life couldn't have been that for any you know that's like he wouldn't let people in his house none of those shots are michael jordan's house oh really yeah well houses in his neighborhood he wouldn't let him in hits yeah i i guess the i I think the tradeoff in life is greatness versus happiness. Do you agree with that? No. No?

I feel like everybody who truly achieves greatness has to like dedicate their entire lives to it. They usually like don't have the family life they want. They don't have the privacy they want. They almost become like a prisoner in their own success are you saying michael was never happy when winning or he's still not happy i don't know maybe happy is not the right word maybe like relax sounds like very lazy like i i think i think he had the rush from winning like it was fucking dopamine to his brain but i think he was like sick of not being able to like you can't come to my house i can't go out in public i you know people telling me like who i am and what i am i don't know i feel like uh

i don't even think we're really getting the full answers on that i thought it was very weird when he started crying last night just talking about being competitive. Yeah. He was talking to his dead dad. He wasn't talking about anything that's really emotional. He was just like, I like to win, man. I like to win a lot. I was like, oh, you're crazy crazy.

You're really crazy. But, yeah, I mean, not that, you know, we all could be Michael Jordan. But, like, you hear the story of him being, like, his trainer being like, when do you want to get back in the gym? He's like, tomorrow. Let's go. In between movies, I'm practicing. In between off-seasons, I don't stop. And it's like anybody can just – we could fucking blog literally around the clock

if we wanted to. We just don't. We're just not that. But whatever. Embrace mediocrity. No big deal. Back to the voicemails. Wait, will you give any answers?

Oh, what's the question? Three notes apps. Oh, my God. Not even close. Okay. I want some comedian who I think would be, like, you know, nerdy about the craft. I'd want some rapper who i think does write down rhymes and i'd want yours you know mine i don't really have it like mine aren't you could get my notebook

my notes app doesn't get a lot of my notebook although my notebook hasn't got much runs since this started either when i I was blogging, doing nothing but blogging, my notes app was filled. Filled with just little comparisons and analogies and scenes from movies that would pop in my head. Names from baseball.

I'd just write down Dante Bichette. I'd just write down names that I think would be funny. I wrote down the other day, actually, the John Dowd, I believe his name. Who? John Dowd. Who's that? He was

Barry Bonds in the video games because he wasn't in the NLBPA. Right. He was just a big white guy. He wasn't even black. His name was John Dowd. He's a three-hitter for the Giants. He just hit fucking piss missiles and wasn't a black man His name was John Dowd. He's a three-hitter for the Giants. Just hit fucking piss missiles and wasn't a black man. It was wild that they just didn't make him black.

They were just like, we're going to make this as opposite of Barry Bonds as possible. But yeah, things like that where it's like, all of my readers are going to – this is going to resonate with them. This is going to be funny. That kind of shit I think would be good. Who would you pick? Okay, Ozzy osbourne oh um ozzy osbourne uh the dude on survivor the the host jeff probst jeff no, change that. Change that. Gordon Ramsay.

Ozzy Osbourne, Gordon Ramsay, and Zidane O'Chara. I bet Z's got really interesting ones. What the fuck? That is – you got a beautiful mind, dude. I'm going to go – Ozzy Osbourne, just because one, I'd be the first person to ever communicate with him in 15 years. Yeah, that's true. To just realistically hear

what he's saying and get his thoughts out. Like, oh, okay. His notes are just like, no one fucking listens to me. It's just the notes of a crazy person. It's like, no one fucking listens to me. He's like Howard Hughes, like, bring in the milk. Bring in the milk. Gordon Ramsay, I think he'd have uh intense like things he just hated like just really angry notes about random people in the street and that'd be

very funny to read and then chara's just such a big sweetheart i bet he's got like the recipe for world savior in there oh wow and just just poems about birds. I would go, uh, it would go like, I'm going to assume that they use it. I think I'd like to see the, the ramblings of Kanye. I'd like, I think that, I think the caller set Elon Musk at the end there.

I would like, I would like to have Elon Musk's notes just to blog. Elon Musk notes are, are less legible than fucking Ozzy Osbourne's. They would be such nonsense. They'd be like, helicopters that can take you to Mars with babies. All this dumb shit that I can blog and be like, look how

fucking stupid Elon thinks that this is going to happen with his babies. Get the fuck out of here. One of the greatest crocks in world history will go down that we ever thought Elon Musk was anything. I used to think Trent was crazy. I was like, like all right you're going a little overboard on this guy like he stayed the court he i mean trent was trent read him right day one because you know what happened he became a celebrity i don't blame him either like if you were a scientist you dedicated

your life to the books and the pencils and the calculators and then all of a sudden you were like the cool guy i'd be like like, yeah, fuck science. I'm going to go party. I'm going to go Joe Rogan. Fuck girls. I don't want to do science shit anymore. Dude, that clip of him telling Joe Rogan how to pronounce his child's name and Rogan straight up

rolling it. Uncontrollable laughter. Not like straight up belly laughing as he explains how he pronounced Ash is unbelievable. If you're asking someone about their child's name and the

question is, is it just the placeholder? It doesn't get ruder than that. It's perfectly acceptable. It's the only accurate way to discuss this name, but to say, is it just the placeholder and then barely laughing in his face if you have to if the there should be one question and one answer about it should be what's your kid's name and you say it that's it there has to be further discussion

you've done it wrong so get the fuck out of here elon dude when Musk, when he goes, Rogan had two lols. It was like, I forget if it was after X or if he said AE is for Ash. And then he goes, and then the last part, that's my contribution in honor of the greatest plane ever created, A-12. And Rogan fucking loses it again.

And then that's when Musk finally gets offended. He's like, no, it is. It's the greatest plane ever created. He's like, no, it's the greatest plane of creation. He's like, dude, he's not laughing at your take on fucking aeroengineering. He's laughing at your child's name, dick. What a fucking asshole. Give me a break. All right, let's go, Nick.

Okay, so I'm sitting here with my wife, and we're talking about butt stuff, you know, just kind of introducing butt stuff. We haven't done anything yet. And I ask, hey, you know, you've probably put a finger around your butthole before. Like, how did that feel? And she's claiming that she's never put a finger around her butthole or in her butthole, which I assume 90% of the population has at one point put their finger near their butthole and then in their butthole to see how it feels. So what do you guys think?

90%, 20%? Am I an outlier here? I think it's 90%. She thinks it's way less than that who's right all right all right this is a great question first of all i think this is for pleasure this is just out of curiosity yeah right i mean you're the guy who fucking bent over looked at it in the in the mirror right seven years old i just want to see what my bottle looks like yeah this is pure curiosity i think it's crazy to get married

before you've had that conversation. My wife was like, I've never put a finger in my butt. We're not married. If you're talking to someone and they're talking about

putting a finger in their butt, we probably met that night. There's no way I'm walking down the aisle. That's like day two shit these days. Give me a fucking break. I've been talking to about just guys too.

Just friends. This stuff is fast conversation. That's light work. I think it's a very high number. I think it's a very high number. I think it's only natural to explore your body. I think everybody's finger in their butt. I think it's 100%. I think

100% of people, except for this woman, have put at least a knuckle in their butthole. It hurts to laugh. It probably happened before you even hit puberty or as a time you hit puberty. It's not a regular thing that's happening in the shower. But when you were in middle school, you're like, what the fuck is this all about? Dude, when you were – no. When you're a little kid, you're a baby. You do weird shit.

I've seen it. I've seen it. You've all – 100%. Now that I just remembered like what my own kids have done, I'll reach over. I'm flapping it. Put that away. Stop. Don't touch that.

Don't touch that there. Put that away. 100% of the population has fingered their butt at some point. Like this wife is telling me she's never even touched a sharp poop. Come on. Oh, absolutely not. No, Last Voice Mail is brought to you. Come on, you've touched a sharp poop before.

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Free shipping to the lower 48 states. Hop on that e-bike and take your rad power bike to the next level. Me and F fights both rock them you should too that's sports to 64 000 hey hey poop guy fights this is producer bc and nick um i was thinking today as you know i'm hungover dehydrated as shit uh i was thinking it'd be great to know like there was a meter that shows how dehydrated i actually am how much more water i need to drink until i'm not dehydrated instead of just chugging random amounts and hoping i feel better in the next hour or so so uh what other types of meters would you guys

like to have that let you know when things are running low or things are high or whatever so uh let me know what you guys think. And Vito. This is a great question too. Two back to back great questions. This is, if you could have like an NBA jam turbo bar for your health and you could know exactly how much, like if you woke up when you're hungover and you look and you got, you see that you got to drink like 200 ounces of water,

it's right back to sleep. It's like, this one exists. This it's right back to sleep. Well, hang on. This one exists. It's just your pee. Your pee is your dehydration meter. Yes, but there are times where you're in the midst of a hangover where you're like, this is never going to stop. What I really think you need it for is coming down from when you're too high.

If I could look at my phone and be like, all right, it's going to be like this for three and a half more hours, and then I'm going to be safe. Like, good. Let me know. Cause when you are too high from an edible or getting poisoned by your friend, fight over it. And you think you're just never going to get off the rollercoaster. That's the type of shit that your, your fucking psyche gets fractured on that one. Let me know when I'm getting down from my high, let me know what my hangover. I also would like, let me know pre-hangover. Let me know how drunk I can get before tomorrow's going to really

fucking suck. Yeah, a drunk one would be nice because you're just like, I might not feel it yet, but I'm drunk. We should know that by now. It's like, oh, I'm slurring my words or I'm getting really loud or I'm dancing. I'm going to be

fucking drunk. I like a horny meter. Ooh. How horny are you right now? I have to be a funny one. I bet your base level, just

you're out in the world, you're a horny five. Always. Minimum. Minimum. It's going to be like your base level, like just, just you're out in the world, you're a horny five. Always minimum. It's going to be like 70. Then maybe, then maybe it dips below five, but like a meter of like point of no return. Like you, you're so horny. You will make a bad life decision. Go jerk off. Have that JJO point of no return where it's like, all right, you're back in the green zone. You're not in the red zone anymore. Boy, that's a good one i i would even maybe uh in my older age like like a food hangover or like a heartburn meter like don't take that last bite you know like you've

ate you've had like 10 wings if you have an 11th you're gonna fucking pay for it the weird thing is all like we have all these meters we just don't listen to was thinking, ooh, food, that'd be a good one. One that can tell you when you're full. I have that fucking meter. I just fucking blow past it at all times. Like your orny meter, you have one. It's your penis. There are levels.

Every single human being has all of these meters built into them. You know what it is, though? It's like the Ray Rice video. When you see it, it hits you harder. If you saw that you were well past your drunk meter, you would drop everything. I got to go home right now. I'm going to be puking all day tomorrow.

I'm gone. I'm getting out of here. I wouldn't listen to that. No. There's no way. A sleep meter was going to be my first answer to know if I have enough sleep. It exists. It absolutely exists. Just don't listen to it. All of these things we have.

Our body is so fucking advanced. We have every meter possible. And it just does not exist. Dude, when you think about how your heart beats, your lungs pump, your kidneys filter, and we're bags of shit then you think about like someone like mj who's at the peak of physical you know like we've we've just been given this gift that we just like throw in the trash we just you know god damn terrible oh speaking of this, did you see what I bought this weekend? No, what'd you get?

At-home tattoo kit. Like a henna tattoo or a real one? Real tattoos. Oh, my God. It's a terrible idea. It's an awful idea that I'm going to have forever now. It doesn't come until May 22nd. What's up?

How's that even legal? Kevin, I jokingly searched it on Amazon Prime. You're practically losing money by not buying these things. Yeah. They start at $15. I bought one for $100. That's the expensive version. I didn't want to cheap out.

So I have a $100 kit to permanently stain my body forever. I'm going to have get like a gun safe and yeah yeah i don't know the code and only be like i'll have to call you to get the code and you can give it to me we gotta have keys we gotta turn our keys at the same time if you you if we don't lock that thing up over under i'll send it out a half homemade tattoos when you come out of quarantine i will have i'm going to have at least one um there there will be it's yeah no i'm getting an at-home tattoo i don't know who's gonna do it yet we're gonna have to probably like rock paper scissors in the family for who gets the honor maybe everyone gets everyone gets a turn everyone gets to draw on me forever once one time i think my brother wants one i think my sister wants i think we're just gonna have like a tattoo night it's like you know benny going to draw on me forever one time. I think my brother wants one. I think my sister wants one. I think we're just going to have a tattoo

night. It's probably going to work out. It's like Benny gets to draw the head. Your dad draws one arm. Polly draws one leg. They're all different Mr. Potato Head features. I think it's kind of cool, actually. The thing, what made me decide to get it is it's probably going to be

a bad tattoo. What's the story behind this tattoo? It's a good fucking story behind it. The whole point of a tattoo is a good story. That's the best story. Yeah. We got together for months and decided to start inking each other up. Inking into people's skin.

All right. Let's get into our interviews. Speaking of tattoos, MGK, Machine Gun Kelly, he's loaded up with them. This interview is brought to you by Screwball Whiskey. If you're looking for the perfect drink to enjoy during your virtual happy hour,

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peanut butter whiskey is the perfect shot or perfect addition to your favorite cocktail. Pick it up at your local store or get it delivered today. Ready to get screwed? Go to screwballwhiskey.com for more info. It's Machine Gun Kelly, one of my favorite interviews we've ever done because I think he's a deeply complex dude, and I truly mean it. We said it several times during this interview, but his new song, Bloody Valentine, is such a fucking banger, and I really, really hope for him that this second act in like the punk rock world is just as good as this first single because how fucking sick would that be

if you were like trying to be a rapper and you kind of made it you've already had success and then you just pull a fucking 90 degree turn totally different style and you just blow the fuck up it'd be awesome if if this song's any hint, that's what's going to happen. I listen to so much punk rock, and I listen to this, and I was like, this is fucking awesome. This is a heater. I mean, he explains it in the interview, but it's basically Mr. Brightside 2.0, which is one of the highest

fucking accolades you can give any song. So let's talk to him, MGK. Yo! What's up, man? What's good? How we doing? Fucking awesome. That's good? How we doing? Fucking awesome. Awesome. That's good to hear.

Dude, I'm going to call my shot right now. First of all, you go by MGK. What should I address you as? Yeah, MGK is cool. Kels. Colson is my real name. So whatever. MGK, I'm calling my shot right here.

I think you and I are going to be friends. Okay. I'm down with that. I like that. I don't lot of my shot right here. I think you and I are going to be friends. OK, I'm down with that. I like that. You know, I don't know you guys' temperature yet. So I'm glad we're starting like that. Yeah. See, I didn't really know. I honestly like what are we eating here?

You got to tell me what you're eating on. They just made me some. What'd you make me? What is this? What was it? Both of those. What was it? Oh, it was like both of those and salmon. I'm loving this.

I just eat the shit. Yeah, listen, the temperature's good then. I like this whole vibe right now. John's feeling good. I like you eating. We're good. We're going to start off on the right foot here. This is good shit. Are we on right now? Is there going to be you eating. We're good. We're going to start off on the right foot here. This is good shit.

Are we on right now? Is everybody doing okay? We're on. We just roll. I noticed that you sent over to your neighbor. You tried to be friends with him because I saw you got in a little bit of a parking war, which I'm dealing with now myself. So I want to get the scoop on what your neighbor's doing because I got all sorts of problems over here. Oh, yeah. I'm good at these type of things.

Is it a house in front of you, next to you, and what's the parking issue? Right across the street. And we live near the train station he accused me of driving from another town and parking in front of his house to walk to the train station so he left a note on my window saying like you're not from around here don't take up my parking spot and i was like motherfucker i live next door hell no that's super aggressive, dude. Right. So I went back to my car and I wrote a response note and I put it on my car facing his house so that he would see it. And we came out, we had words in the whole nine, but he felt stupid as fuck when I was like, I live right there, dude. It was great. Damn. Yeah. Mine extends, I mean, I'm in a bit of a predicament because parallel to me across the street is him who has a problem or had a problem. We solved this.

But right next door, they might be outside right now. Oh, shit, the guy is outside. But this guy, fucking, the whole family hates me. I'm like, I have so many problems with your fucking house. Fuck my house. Your fucking house looks crazy. I can't even. He's outside smoking a cigarette.

We're within a good 10 feet of each other. So I'm not, no, but this, but, but yeah, over here it was, it was basically like, you know, um, a lot of us live in this house and each of us have multiple cars or a bunch of

motorcycles. And like, I mean, it's got, yeah. I mean, I admit it's got to kind of be unpleasant sometimes. And that was,

I heard how you sent him a bottle of Dom and was like, let's be friends. So that's cool. Yeah, yeah. But you know what? He's new on the block. So I was, you know, I was, we should have met when he first moved in, you know what I mean? Just to make it clear, like, hey, I am your neighbor. Would you do something like that?

Like someone of your status? Like do you go over with like no offense and be like welcome to the neighborhood? I feel like you're too big for that. Yeah, I do that. You do that shit? What do you bring up? I know the people on my block. I also know who doesn't like me on my block.

But like it's half and half. It's half and half and that's okay. But like there's this kid right here. A couple hours down, he's probably, like, 12, 13. But, like, dude, every time I see him outside shooting hoops or something or skating, I'll come skate with him or shoot hoops with him or stuff like that. Yeah, you seem like a very friendly dude.

And I feel like that kind of translates into your work because it seems like you're doing music with, like, everybody. You know everybody. You're collabing with everybody. Is that because you're, like, a friendly dude? Fuck, man. I'd say, you know, my reputation for a long time was kind of the opposite, which may have been – not that I wasn't friendly,

but I was just very on the defense all the time. You know how you answered the fucking call today and you were like – and I said even too. See, I must be on some, like, 2015 shit because even I was like, what's your temperature? You know what I mean like we're really it's like you're ready why are we doing interviews with each other if we don't even fucking like each other you know what i mean obviously we respect each other's work so obviously but like you know that's part of growing up and being kind of like just the odd one out all the time i was like the you know like i

was the odd one out in middle school i was the odd one out in high school i'm the odd one out in the rap game i'm the odd one out in the pop punk game i'm the odd one out on on tours you know like i was the odd one out in middle school i was the odd one out in high school i'm the odd one out in the rap game i'm the odd one out in the pop punk game i'm the odd one out on on tours you know what i mean i like you know like it's shit man it's no i that makes sense to me though it's like when you when you kind of dabble in a bunch of different worlds some if your whole if your whole life if even from down to you know your home life you're just you're just like the the odd one you know what i mean you gotta think i'm the only blonde one in my whole fucking family it's just like i was always odd you know what i mean like i was the tallest brother in school i wore the same outfit every fucking day i was the most awkward one i was always the one with like

dreams way too big for someone to even understand like i would be you know i'd be in high school writing these raps or middle school writing these raps. And I'm like, I'm going to be the biggest thing on the fucking planet. And everyone's like, dude, how could this little fucking dork who's sitting right next to me be anything like this is such a, I was so lost in big dreams that everyone just thought I was crazy. So, you know, I grew up on the defense. And then obviously when I came out, it wasn't like exactly like I came out with like, you know, because I mean, it's funny when I look back, I think about like Mac, because me and Mac blew at the same time. And we were both like he was he was literally like a fucking almost like a like a state neighbor because I'm in Cleveland. He's in fucking Pittsburgh. You know, we arrange other into each other's cities a couple of times and and hung out with each other back before we ever blew up and like he was always like a like just fucking just nice with the bars and just a nice dude and

i was always kind of like i grew up just rapping in the streets and shit so all my shit was really kind of i was already damn near about to fight everybody because i'll be the only white boy in a battle circle and like if shit went if i said something too crazy or someone was losing or someone was whatever like people don't want to you know yeah no that makes sense lose to me so i'm already just kind of just fighting just to get my respect and so i it was it was like you know i was kind of like the guy to root for but also the guy to hate and i just took an interesting path so i think my i had to find myself be confident with myself and fucking just to not be on the defense anymore and just be like that was a really long explanation i'm very sorry about that no i find it usually be

do you think like the interesting path leads you to the guy was going through your catalog the other day and like you have to be the only person who's dabbled in every, like you have songs with fucking tech nine, kid rock, Camilla Cabello, Haley Seidel. You like you, Travis Barker, you go through everything.

Do you think there's anyone who's like crossed that many genres as you? No, I think no, I know. And you know, obviously you want to speak on it. As it's happening and you want to be like, but look, I'm defying a genre. Look, I'm not sticking to one thing or like, look, when I release something, you have to question, OK, well, what's this release going to be?

It's not like a predictable, easy click. Like, OK, well, I know what this is going to sound like. But a lot of people, it scares a lot of people at first because you're like, what the fuck? You're all over the place. But it's like, I just don't want to you know there's a reason why 10 years later speaking on right now like my label hit me and there's like there's more clicks on your name right now that's up by like 29 than ever in your career and i'm like this is fucking crazy even me i feel so new you know what i mean like probably because i just found myself and it's exciting again it makes me be

like you know like when do you think that i'm excited to hear my you know more of my shit you know what I mean like just from my head and from my musicianship go ahead what do you say when do you feel like that happened because I I you know as as a fan just on the outside I feel like recently it does feel I don't want to say you popped because you've been on the scene for a while but something changed right was it I don't know if it's popped because you've been on the scene for a while, but something changed, right? I don't know if it's when you went maybe a little more punk rock or if something happened on social media or maybe the battle with Eminem, whatever it might have been,

something changed where I feel like you went to a whole new level. Yeah, I think it's all those things combined. I think it's someone, I think you finally not just recognizing the person by their face or the name and being like recognizing like that there's talent and recognizing that you're a fan of maybe some shit that you know like even even if it's to the movies that i've done or you know like those it gets to a certain point because i i i'd say my face popped right when i came out because from the jump even when

i blew with wild boy it was like i would be on beaches in the caribbean or i'd be touring in like fucking russia and i mean we'd get mobbed everywhere like everyone would be like oh shit like i know your face you know what i mean even if they only know the one song at that time it was like they knew the face but yeah i agree i think that the the respect and all that shit kind of came um recently which is really cool yeah i. Respect on a level outside of like just kind of the cult fan base that we have. I feel like I was – I kind of dove in more with the battle with Eminem. And then when I learned more about how you're doing like the more punk rock vibe, I realized it was like you're not really what I thought you were

when I took the time to really take a look at it and that there was a lot more and a lot different. And, I mean. It's awesome. The new single, Bloody Valentine, is fucking fire. That shit goes. I'm not just... It goes off. It's a fucking heater.

That's why I said we're going to be friends, man. The second that came on, I was like, oh, I did not fucking expect this. I didn't know what I expected, but I did not expect this. Bloody Valentine is fucking awesome. Awesome. Wait till you guys see the music video, dude,

because you'll find out whose foot that is. The fucking... You know the foot on the cover of the... You have to find it. But just the video itself, man. It's it's some it's cool it's some cool shit i was gonna say what day is it today yeah hopefully in the next week or two it'll be out the uh speaking of cool shit you were doing you're doing shit in quarantine

and where you're kind of doing covers and things like that, one in particular jumped out at me, and I think everyone, is the Marilyn Manson Rihanna song. How fucking cute was that? That was dope. Dude, that was the craziest shit ever. I was like... First of all, it's just... I'm talking about my performance, to be clear.

I'm saying how crazy is it that of all songs, that's a Marilyn Manson's head. You could hear it in your voice where you were like, oh, OK. All right. I didn't expect that one, but let's fucking go. I said everything. Every part of that video. It's I don't know.

Was it two minutes, 30 seconds, something like that. But from one FaceTiming Marilyn Manson to two Marilyn Manson requesting Rihanna, and three, your cover of it, I thought were all 10 out of 10. Like, that was fucking – And again, this was like – this was where I was talking to Kevin last night about getting to interview him. I'm like, he's a lot different than what I thought he was. He's got some fucking awesome shit.

And I was floored by that, floored by Bloody Valentine. I'm a machine gun Kelly diehard now. You're a stan. I'm a fucking big Kelly Diehard now. You're a stan. I'm a fucking big stan, man. Big stan. You know what, man? Number one, I really do appreciate you saying that. I think it's very cool.

I think one thing I realized was and I hope artists that are watching this or anybody just watching this period that is kind of wondering whenever their time is coming or whatever the fuck. Like, dude, I had to sit there for 10 years and eat so much shit just to, you know, reach a point where I finally felt comfortable. Not in my own skin, but just kind of like, yeah, confident, I guess,, and, and finally getting some type of payback for the work that I felt like I was putting in from the jump. But like,

you know, seeing like Cuddy, the way that him kind of like 10 years later after his first album, like the young people coming out, like Jaden Smith and all these people coming out and being like, yo, he's the goat or like, yo,

I fucking like love what he, cause people, you know, the peers weren't saying that at the time when he came out. You know what I mean? I was living it. I was there. I was watching.

You know what I mean? And just to see him get his flowers and shit, it's really cool because I've seen so many peers of mine fucking not get their flowers. You know what I mean? And they're gone and they'll, you know, and they might not ever know how we felt. So I really do appreciate that, man. I do. To be honest, though, I got to be honest, though. I got to be honest.

I would be hypocritical if I wasn't honest about it. Not too long ago when I was writing blogs and on the podcast, I definitely have said the phrase, fuck MGK. Because in your personal life, dude, you've been on a hot streak with some of the company you've been keeping. A couple of the girls you've been hanging out with are at the top of my list of girls that I would go hard for. And you are running through them, dude. You've been doing well. You've been doing well on that scene. And I feel like it's been a good run on that front.

Oh, I genuinely like all these people. So I wouldn't necessarily put it in the words that you said. That is rude the way I'm saying it, but every time I see another headline, it's like, you are hanging with, whether you're making music, whether you're making movies, whether it's your personal life, you are with all the dopest people out there right now. Oh, thanks, man. Thank you. Yeah, I don't know but i mean you know it's you live and you learn man i don't care that you said fuck mgk before you know all that matters is the end story that's kind of what i was saying so that's kind of what i was trying to say i'm high as fuck obviously but i was trying to

you know kind of just say to people out there like yo you just stick through shit and you just you know take of course i know you're not the only one that said that either you know what i mean there's millions you know what i'm saying and the point is yeah but i'm also saying i i meant it in a in a like i'm jealous because you're killing it way i'm not saying like fuck you i'm saying like every time i saw the girl you're hanging with or the movie you're doing, I'm like, this fucking guy is living the dream right now. I mean, yeah. You're not alone, man.

Even when I go out, dudes like you hate me all the time, so it's all right. Is that true, though? Do you feel like the average guy is hating on you? Oh, absolutely. You say when you go out, people say it to your face? Oh, yeah. That's rude. I'll do it on your back, bro.

I'll say it on my blog. I wouldn't do it to your face. Oh, wait. Can you do a trick for us? I saw on your Instagram, you blew a ring and then you snorted it. Uh-huh. I got less room.

Hold up. Dude, I love smoke tricks smoke yeah you can do that it's a point oh sure you recorded my bad can i do one little smoke trigger here you don't gotta stop recording just like man i want to be a fucking rock star. That's fucking great. I would do that shit every time. Can you see that? Yeah. Hold up.

Wait, wait, wait. Sorry, guys. The master of his craft here. Got to get it right. Oh, you didn't see it, huh? I did it. Watch it go. That's good.

No, I'm not. I keep getting giddy. I'm,'m like dancing. Could you see it? Yeah. I would do that. I don't know if you can see it or not, but it was going in there every time.

Every time I would do that shit. I need a name for it, dude. I never have a name for it. Do you guys have any suggestions? You know what we'll do, too? We'll come up with some shit, but when we put out the podcast, we'll put it out on social. We'll see if we can get some ideas out there. We'll crowdsource this.

I don't know how naming tricks works, but the first thing that came to mind was blowing smoke. Because you're – I mean, you're – Blow, blow, smoke. That's crazy. That's're, I mean, you're, you're crazy. That's a pun. That's a bar, dude. Yeah.

Um, we, we had a question for you when we have, first of all, happy birthday, right? It was your birthday last week. Thank you.

Yes. Um, but we have a lot of like, when we have celebrities come through, we do like your birthday, your birthday booze crew, like who you'd want to go out with, we do your birthday booze crew, who you want to go out with, who shares a birthday with you.

Do you happen to know any of the celebrities who share one with you? Yeah. Do you know them? Do you have them written down? I got them for you. Alright, we got... Okay, my neighbor went in the house. Yeah, that dude fucking keeps doing it. We got... Alright, we got... Okay, my neighbor went in the house. Yeah, that dude fucking keeps doing that. We got Amber Heard,

Jack Nicholson. Oh, that guy. That was why I was stoked on my birthday, was that Jack had my birthday. Would he be in it? We also have Peter Frampton, Jeffrey Dean Morgan.

There was one other one. Tito. Oh, Terry Francona. You're a Cleveland boy. Terry Francona on the list. You can chop it up with him and have a time. That's tight. I'm going with Jack for sure.

Jack and Tito would be a wrecking crew. Jack, Tito, or Kelly. Watch the fuck out, man. Damn. Yeah, actually, one of my favorite rooms to hang out in LA is a secret room in this bar. But yeah, Jack Nicholson, Lennon, Jim Belushi,

all these people, they used to kick it in this back room all the time. It's like the secret room that we go in. It's called the Nicholson Room. It's called the Nicholson Room? Who do you go back there with? Friends. Friends. It's one of the rooms if other actors are there,

other musicians, whatever. Musicians, we all go kind of hang back there. Dude, we got... I played Bloody Valentine for people back there all the time on the speakers and went out into the main bar and would just play it. Like I play, I would always play the Killers, Mr. Brightside.

Then I would follow the Bloody Valentine to like no one would really, you know, not think that the song was, they wouldn't even know that it was me. They were just like, they were just vibing, but I would always just set it with Mr. Brightside. So they're just in it. This was a long time before the song came out. That's a duo right there, man. We got a request. Can we throw out a cover idea since you've been doing them all through quarantine?

Yeah, definitely. Can you do The Greatest Show? You know the musical, The Greatest Show? Yeah, yeah. My boy did that soundtrack, actually. No. That's the theme of our podcast. The Greatest Showman?

Your boy did that soundtrack? The Greatest Showman the theme of our podcast the greatest showman your boy did that soundtrack the greatest showman one of like the hardest going songs i don't know if you've seen the movie when it starts and there's like at a circus go if you're not all the time though about how it's number one it's like number one all the fucking time that out that that soundtrack or something. The greatest showman monsterhead. I also consider myself the greatest showman on stage.

That is appropriate. If you've never been to one of our shows, I assume you have not. I have not. Why would you assume I have not? Why do you say that? Because if you would have seen us live, you would have been a fan from the day that you saw it i thought you were you were uh profiling me nah dude you look cool thank you bro

starting a lie on the podcast we can't have that no you got fucking weird astronauts in the back he has a he. It's cool shit. Yeah, it's cool. I got my children's artwork up here. Yeah. That's awesome. All right, man. Well, we appreciate the time. The new single is very dope, Bloody Valentine.

Later in July is Tickets to My Downfall? Yeah, July. It's a summer album for sure. Alright, man. Thanks so much for the time. We appreciate it. Alright, I need... Can you guys go... I need you guys to get in your car and go blast that and ride to that shit.

You know what I mean? Get the Barstool Squad on that. This is the fucking beer pong fucking anthem. This is the fucking riding in your car with your friend anthem. This is the fucking go to the beach, watch the sunset anthem. This is the fall in love anthem. This is the fucking... This is car with your friend, Anthem. This is the fucking go to the beach, watch the sunset, Anthem. This is the fall in love, Anthem. This is the fucking, this is all of that.

We're having a bar school beer pong tournament, and it's going to be obviously quarantine. And I'll make you this solemn promise, MGK. That will be my song on repeat whenever I'm playing. Let's go! That's all right. Thank you, dude. Thank you so much, man.

Before you guys play that game, go ahead and run that replay back of me hitting the three-cup game winner on the Nelk Boys. Yo, we were saying on our last podcast, we were talking about things that still make you feel really athletic. And you skate and shit. You said you hoop, so you're probably still athletic already. But hitting beer pong, number one. If you go back-to-back on a cup, that shit, you said you hoop, so you're probably still athletic already, but hitting beer pong, number one. If you go back-to-back on a cup, that shit, you get the crowd going, number one,

you're still feeling an athlete in your prime. Yep. Winning a Grammy, winning a beer pong. Same level. All right, man. Thank you, man. All right, so there's a guy, Machine Gun Kelly, who will just never be even a fraction as cool as he is.

I'm looking forward to when Machine Gun Kelly does a rap about blowing smoke. That was you. You can put your hand up on that one. I have bars. I have bars. If you watched the interview, he was like, oh, shit, I like that. That's a bar. That was very, oh, shit. I like that. A bar. That was very cool.

That was a very cool moment. So go download Bloody Valentine. Cannot co-sign it enough. And now let's get into it with Logan Paul. This interview was brought to you by Aveo. Daily contact lenses are easy and convenient, which are two things that we all could use right now. Whether you're working from home, you're staring at your screens all day, you're chasing your kids around, playing teacher. Wouldn't it be nice to have a comfortable, technologically advanced pair of contacts delivered right to your door? That's what Aveo

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trial pack for one dollar you're not going to get a better deal on this. So go to Aveo vision.com slash KFC. Yeah. I hope this shit is over soon, bro. I'm kind of getting over it. Dude. I, I,

we, we were told that like, hopefully by the end of the month, we'll be back in the office. And I never thought I'd be hoping for that, but I am. Yo, what's up,

man? What's up, brother? We're doing good. I'm doing good, bro. Y'all good. Yeah, man. Did I just hear you say you're ready to go back, man? What's up, brother? How we doing, dude? I'm doing good, bro. Y'all good? Yeah, man. Did I just hear you say

you're ready to go back, John? Oh, fuck that, man. I've been ready. Say it ain't so. Say it ain't so. Look, here's the deal. I like hanging out at home, cooking myself some duck for dinner. Who eats duck at home,

though? At 4 p.m. What is that? I had to squeeze dinner in right before this. But I chef up. I've become a fucking monster chef in this quarantine. How have you? I cook every meal and I

slaughter it. Did you see that spinach I bought today? I bought so much spinach. It's fucking crazy you're cooking duck at 4 p.m and calling it dinner man this ain't good this ain't good dude that is very funny duck and fucking 4 p.m i love it yo uh what is is this a home studio for you? Yeah, dude. I'm in a garage, technically, but I mean,

we kind of decked it out, but yeah. That's fucking dope, man. I've been watching you. Oh, wow. That's sick. That's a good setup you got there, man. It's like a whole home studio right there. I was watching you, like, I don't know, maybe a couple weeks ago it was, just fucking bouncing around in that bungee cord thing.

Oh. I was telling John, we were doing maybe a couple weeks ago was just fucking bouncing around in that bungee cord thing. Oh, I was telling John, we are doing the dumbest, most random shit. Like, yeah, I don't know. We're a bungee jump thing in our house.

I don't even want to say the things I did. Cause like as a 25 year old adult male, it's kind of fucking corny. Are you, are you adult male? male is kind of fucking corny. Do you feel like an adult male? I want to assure you that a fucking bungee jump dunk in your living room is not corny. That's pretty fucking cool.

Maybe some other shit, but not that one. That's fucking dope. Are you throwing it back to a few years ago when you were just doing wild shit to put up there? What else are you throwing it back to like a few years ago when you were just doing wild shit to like, to put up there? Cause it's like, what else are you going to do? Right? Yeah.

It's, it's anything that is like, is like shock value or I've said this in my vlog sort of as a joke, but I realized it's actually not. I'll do things just to feel something, whether it's like we ate a hot chip the other day where I took like 10 shots of lemon juice and kept putting my hands in like mousetraps. Like, bro, I have one here.

I'll do it right now because of the quarantine, bro. It's, it's made me numb of all emotions and feelings, both physically and emotionally. Mousetrap, bro. Ow.

I'll just, I'll just do shit. No, you are. I mean, you're just sounding like an addict right now But you're like addicted to the internet Yeah you need to live

That's something that buzz Well I mean think about it I'm assuming your life Pre-quarantine you said you're 25 You're killing it I feel like you probably were out and about You're partying with chicks I mean last time I really was seeing you guys It was like Superbowl and you're on the jet and you got porn stars and you guys are partying.

And then all of a sudden, poof, that's all gone. Right. So I feel like that's it's like it's like you said, addicts, man, you can't just go cold turkey. You can't go cold turkey on life. Exactly, man. I'm losing over here. But it's good because something about filming all of it and putting it online makes it acceptable. Let's be honest, bro. If I was in my house not filming myself drinking shots

of lemon juice and throwing the pool ball in the pool holes and it'd be weird, dude. Yeah, you're a total weirdo. You put it on the internet for everyone to see and it's like, yeah, it's work. It's work, man. Exactly. and so uh now what now we're dipping our toe into the movie game huh is that what's next yeah bro so i've been dipping like yeah i mean this is this is this is an old uh old project right that's just finally coming to light yeah man we shot this three years ago and

uh yeah today actually yeah valley girl came out it's cool it's a musical that takes place in the in the 80s and although like i'm primarily a digital kid i i do like to sink my teeth into some acting stuff from time to time just tell me musical looking ball yeah bro your boy like uh you rang he loves you where goddamn call, dude? I'm all about musicals. Wait, really? I swear to God. Fuck it. Hang on. Where are we at right here? This is my latest hot one.

Yo, I was just about to ask you this. Oh my God, bro. You like The Greatest Showman? No, we opened the show against our theme song for the podcast. Bro, it's the best. So fucking... Yo, I watched it's the best. It's so fucking... Yo, I watched it on a plane, I think coming home from LA once, and I watched

it twice. I was just like, as soon as it got done, I was like, run that shit back. My first time I've seen it. Wow, you really like musicals. I love musicals. He thought you were fucking with him. He thought you were messing with him. Like, alright, yeah, musicals, I get it. Like, no, man, we really love that shit. No, man, I go to Broadway, like, the thing i do most in new york is go to broadway i go all the way it's a true

story dude bro greatest showman my my top three favorite movies i have the entire soundtrack i was actually about to walk out to uh fuck what song was it uh i forget i was about to walk out to one of the songs for my first fight because Yeah, I mean, that's the thing. Those songs on that soundtrack, they fucking go, man. They're not like little hoity-toity songs. They fucking thump, you know? Yeah, yeah. So this is, yeah. It's like, so Greatest Showman was an original soundtrack.

This is, I don't know what the verbiage is, but we sang songs from the 1980s. So you got the pipes too, huh? Nope. They didn't let me sing. That's fair. I have one line. I have one sing line. But honestly, honestly, dude, sure give me more, bro.

Let's be honest. Technically, I'm a platinum recording artist. Help me help you feature my, don't we, multi-platinum record. Listen, you throw a little auto-tune on somebody, everybody sounds good enough. Come on. Get the fuck out of here, right? Give me a break. So was this the first full movie, though?

Full thing you've been a part of, or what? This is definitely the biggest. It's not the first full movie. I've done some primarily uh primarily like digital based youtube premium uh some netflix stuff this is this is the definitely like the biggest budget uh mgm films like the lion that roars it's that production company bro so when i found that out i don't know i mean this this thing had a lot of weight behind it. Yeah, man, that lion. I mean, everybody knows that. Oh, shit. You're about to see a real fucking movie, man.

Exactly. And so it's got to be weird, though, dropping three years later, right? I feel like most of the time it's like, you know, we just wrapped up a couple of months ago and now we're going to put it out. It's like you probably haven't seen some of these people or talk to them or whatever in a while or you stayed in touch. Not long. I haven't spoken to the cast people or talked to them or whatever in a while or you stayed in touch? Nah, long. I haven't spoken to the cast in a while, man. I mean, three years. I was 22 at the time. This was

pre- Japan scandal. Things have changed just a little bit in the last three years for me. I'm a new human. Had you been boxed and shit then? Are you little bit in the last three years. I'm a new human. Had you been boxing and shit then? Like, are you much smaller in the movie?

Uh, dude, no, actually check this out. So boxing, uh, thinned me out. Boxing made me skinnier.

Uh, yeah. Yeah. So dude, I play a, I play a high school jock, a tennis player. Mickey,

right? Mickey, Mickey Bowen. Hey Mickey, you're so fine you're so fine you're blowing my mind hey mickey like that song's about me oh shit before the before we started shooting the director's like hey i don't know how to tell you this like you're playing like a high school tennis player and you're a little thick right now

like you're kind of bulky and and we want you to lose 20 pounds. I was like, that's no problem. I could do that. And I didn't do that. So you got body shamed on set. Bro, body shamed. If that was a girl, if that was a female, there'd be headlines all over the place. Bro, I'm a 210-pound tennis player just walking around,

arms as thick as my thighs, bro. I bet the director was just like, well, I don't know. He didn't do it. Action. Whatever. I showed up to set and she was kind of like, I saw. She looked at me up and down and she didn't say it because she wanted to keep the vibes good, but I just felt her

energy, her disapproval of my way out. she sliced all your songs she was like fuck this bro the problem is i told her i would do it it's not her fault like i so confidently confidently looked her in the eyes i was like rachel yeah this is not you 20 pounds no problem see the thing is everybody can relate to that everybody has done that but usually it's like to themselves in the mirror. I'm going to get this beach body ready. And then when they don't, it's like, all right, whatever.

But you, you didn't do a director on a movie set. I felt so bad, but I just couldn't shade the weight. And see, if I wasn't so young, I would have known how to do it. Like now I could do it, no problem. It would have been like a diet thing and, and, uh, a difference in the way I work out. But at the time, all I knew was like bench press and curls. Right. Right. Yeah, man. Were you like, like in there just, just pulling up two 35s and be like, I can't, I don't understand why I'm not getting skinnier. Bro, my agents are, my agents specifically told me, he goes, stop lifting weights.

Just run. I go, no problem. Go to the gym. I'm on the treadmill. All of a sudden, I blink. I'm doing bench press. I don't know how I got there. I'm repping 225 for 15.

That's out now. You can get it on demand on the gym? You can get it somewhere. It's on Amazon. It's video on demand the chip so you can get it somewhere it's on amazon it's video on demand it's oh good okay where where they're made i think it's on uh google play youtube i got you logan what else is what else is cooking man what else is going on i saw i've been seeing some of these impulsive clips i feel like you guys have been tackling some heavy subjects and yeah like doing some real some real shit on that show it's good bro it's a good show

you know we've been we've been opening up a lot about uh ourselves and what's going on in our lives because like we're a guest-based podcast but quarantine has made that very difficult right so yeah man we've just been we've just been grinding out these episodes the vlogs too man we're crushing it we're fucking crushing it like three vlogs a week two podcasts a week everyone on the team is thriving i don't know if y'all seen mike shit but he just really dropped the book right yeah bro he's been working on this for eight years and like i've known him for six my whole duration of our friendship he's been working on this book dude we we were just talking about it like two episodes ago. I started writing a book for two weeks and quit already. So the book shit,

man, I tip my cap to him because when you got a story to tell you real, like the idea of a completed book sounds awesome. And it's like, Oh, if I could do this, it would sell and it would be everything. And I know how to write like all that shit.

But to actually do it is a whole different ballgame. But he had, I mean, the differences. John, what was your story? What was your book going to be about? I didn't know. I was finding out along the way. Whereas Mike was like, let me tackle like, you know, this book. And he went to the bottom and came back up again.

So it's a little bit different when you have that motivation. I was moving back here with my parents for quarantine and I was like, oh, this is going to be interesting. And then I started. It's not interesting. I mean, duck at 4 p.m. End of the book. That's it. Bro, it's almost like I feel this way often about like

really intense autobiographies like they almost shouldn't be written because of how dangerous and, and the trials and tribulations that that person had to go through to be able to read that book. Like, bro, Mike should not be alive. Like, he is, he is a walking miracle. The dude should have died 10 times. He's had a gun in his mouth five, like, and that's literally just scratching the surface if you were to tell him that before all of it went down and before he released the book like

any normal person be like no i don't i don't want to go through all that right i don't want to have to do any of that right he does have an incredible story to tell and so like you know it's that picture he posted of himself and big mike he was i mean that was an entirely different human i i that i said i go i go when i met him i was like well i call you big mike bro you're not that big he's like one inch taller than me about same weight he goes oh you have no idea yeah i lost 300 pounds i was addicted to heroin i go i see i see i get it now i get it he was uh he was he was thick he was looking like logan showing up to the movie set real big bro facts the team thriving everyone's doing well what's what's the word though uh forget

about work though like fun wise party wise socially wise like so for me bro they tend to go they tend to go hand in hand like and i i've been escaping to my ranch with my dad, who's actually next to me here. Check this out. He came back from the ranch today. How are you? I actually saw, I didn't get a chance to catch the whole episode, but I saw the clip of you giving out fatherly advice and whatnot. It sounded like you know what the fuck you're talking about, man.

Well, you know, I don't know about that, but. Hey, look at this. It looks like it turned out pretty good if you ask me So, yeah, two out of two is not bad, right? Yeah Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo Bring up your leg here Yo, so he works at my ranch

And he was fixing his stove How high can you bring it? Bro, his stove in the cottage that he was in Like blew up Oh, shit Oh, my God in the cottage that he was in blew up and fried his fucking leg. Oh my god! Caught my ass

on fire. Holy shit! I'm saying, went kaboom around me. I was like, oh shit, this is not good. I ran outside, got a fire extinguisher. The chick that was in the place i told her get out

she ran out and i was like i got one shot to put this fire out and if i don't make it it's an explosion and i'm texting logan saying the cottage is gone bro holy shit and you put it out yeah dude put it out and wouldn't set the propane tank off. And the gal I was with standing out there naked, bawling her eyes out. She's like, what just happened? I'm like, oven exploded. She's like, we could have died. We could have died.

And I'm like, I know. She's like, but you're so calm. I'm like, well, look, when shit happens, you've got to be cool or you lose it. So, you know. Yeah, well, sign me up for losing it. I would have been naked and crying. What the hell was that? Sign me up for losing it.

Not only would I have been naked and losing it, I'm not going back in there. No way. He's a psycho. I would have said, Logan, you're doing pretty well. You can buy another fucking cottage, whatever. That shit blew up.

That's the part where I question am i really doing okay am i what do you what do you what do you think when you see him fucking bouncing on the bungee cords smashing into lamps and all that nonsense he's doing that shit as a kid right yeah i'm sure you've seen that before yeah i don't know if this is going to be the right answer but the real answer is i wish i was there doing it with him so it does look fun i'm like shit i'm out here in the ranch on fire and he's fucking positive on a bungee cord you know yeah true something backwards there i mean things things are so is there more movies in store or what yeah i think the next one uh i wrote with my roommate evan evan oh so we're talking you know now we're doing this goodwill hunting shit huh we're gonna go get some oscars for writing yeah maybe maybe bro but like i think i think the the sweet spot for me is going to be combining the thing that

i love most about digital media in in that we can control it and and uh shape what the creative looks like and then the legitimacy of hollywood like that's why i act it's it's it's fun to be respected for like an actual craft i'm not sure sure being a YouTuber is there yet. I like both. I think this next movie is going to be the one. Are you good at it? No. Not yet? I'm serious. I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not a... Okay, I'm about as good an actor as Dwayne Johnson is. That's good enough. What the fuck is that? I mean, it's good. It's good enough.

But like, you know, you won't catch me pulling off like the thespian. Right. No, no, no. I understand that. But listen, The Rock still, you know, he has his moments where like, all right, this scene, he's like being a tough guy, action hero. But this scene, he's being like the father. And this scene, he's pulling at the heartstrings. He's a pretty good actor.

The daddy's got to go to work scene from Fast and Furious where he rips a cast off his arm. That scene's great. That scene's great. No, but like any time I can – the closer I can get to like playing myself is my bread and butter. Like, because, bro, acting's tricky. I had a movie called The Thinning where I was like a serious character and I would play it pretty well if I do say so myself. And I'd come home and I'd still be sort of like melancholy and sullen and downtrodden. It made me like depressed because the character

was like this kind of like depressed, bottled up emotional team. And I honestly, bro, all I want to fucking do in life is have fun. So if I go on set, you do some physical comedy, some action, make some jokes, go home, dream come true. I look forward.

Do you like acting classes? Yeah, I took acting classes for five years, yeah. Oh, no shit. There's like a word for this where I'm much better at being me on camera.

Were you in these acting classes, are they like regular old sign up? Because you were already famous five in these acting classes are they like regular old sign up because like you were already famous five years ago so like can you just go to a regular person's acting class or people just like give us logan paul uh you can because the acting class i went to also has other successful actors and actresses in them oh really yeah like uh that's like you gotta know someone right uh yeah i i got I got shot up to the masterclass. I think, I think because of who I was, like I didn't go through like all the, and I do

have like a natural component, but like, bro, these, these, most of these people are 9,000 times better actors. Who do you, give me an example of someone you're alongside. Can you say that or not? Yeah. Not, I've never did a scene with her, but she, she was in a couple of in you know um shane lean woodley oh yeah oh yeah yeah so she went there a lot and there's a couple like big supporting actors and actresses that went there anybody give you anybody throw any shade being like what are you doing here uh honestly no bro bro. One thing about actors is they're the ones who are still working to perfect their craft anyways, not the ones who already made it.

The ones who are in the grind and have come really from ground up. They're really nice. They're really great, special people and really accepting. And you also have to be, bro. Acting, I'm going to be honest, acting is's fucking weird dude like you pretend to be someone else it's there's there's a vulnerability and openness there that you have to have otherwise it's just not going to work and everyone in my class has had that so that sounds like a movie right there and in and of itself is like a youtuber trying to make it as an actor and he meets other people in his acting class i think that's that's maybe on the on the table i look forward to you uh to you pissing off

another like another realm of people who are like you know he shouldn't be an actor he shouldn't be in movies it's like guess what i'm succeeding at this too motherfucker yeah that's that's honestly that's the goal we did it with professional boxing Let's see if we can take over Hollywood. I mean, at this point, seriously, though, is it money anymore? What's the motivation? Is it to stick it to people at this point? I like proving people wrong. I mean, you're set money-wise, right?

Ten times over, I'm sure. Not ten times over. You can't give me a million bucks. Say again? You can't give me a million bucks, I bet. I can't, bro. My business manager would be pissed. I'm set, but I'm not like

set for life. Like I still have much work to do. No, you don't. If you keep living the way you fucking live. Yeah, that's that's see, that's the problem. My monthly expenses are like, I don't even know if I could say this, bro. Like I

million dollars a month. My monthly expenses are like, I don't even know if I can say this, bro. Quarter million dollars a month. We just buy cars. I don't fucking know. I don't know. I don't know. See, that's funny because that face right there, again, this is kind of relatable. It's just like take many, many zeros zeros off but most people are doing that like they're looking at their online banking like i took an uber there i went to that restaurant there i did this and that

and for you it's like i bought two lambos what the fuck was i thinking bro it's like uh it's honestly a lot of like payroll and just actual regular expenses. I just have like a lot of people working for me. I have a lot of moving pieces and yeah. So I buy some stuff too sometimes. One of it. One of it. Yeah.

You know, I mean, so what dude? Cause I saw like right before we started, um, I think the new blog you tweeted was trying to get 10 grand from Lana. Yeah, Lana Rose. Yeah, asking Lana Rose for 10K.

I can't believe I just forgot Lana's name, by the way. Don't ever do that again. That's crazy. What was the deal? You were just asking her for money? So we got Mike a billboard for his book. It cost 25K. I had 15K cash upstairs, and i figured it'd be a good story point

that get her to chip in and then also dude my business managers my finance team is very good so anytime i'm forking over like cash which is like almost every video now at this point i get a call a very disapproving uh scolding call like hey i just want to let you know like you should not be spending they're way ahead of it but they're like yo you should not be spending any more money until incomes income starts coming in luckily shameless plug we're gonna start we're gonna start uh maverick clothing up again may 22nd so i i've i'm really confident in this brand and my ability to market this brand because of how true

it is to me and how close to home it hits. And so, yeah, I've been spending a little recklessly because I just don't like, bro, I don't like living my life based on money, man. I fucking hate that. That's some rich people shit right there.

Money doesn't define me. Fuck off, Logan Paul. No, but bro, but I've always been like that. But like, man, I read some comments yesterday. People are forgetting. Like I didn't, I didn't just, bro, I've been rich for like two years, maybe. You earned it. Yeah.

I mean, you know, and it was because before i was rich i would always invest in myself and spend money on the things that that would make me happy and that doesn't mean a lamborghini i'm talking about like i would buy i would spend 90k on a podcast set before i've ever done one podcast in my life, like a major investment in myself that happened to pay off, pay off. So yeah, bro. I don't know. Here's the, here's the conclusion. Here's the takeaway, bro. I Logan Paul will either be a billionaire or dead fucking broke. You will see. I like it. No, no, in between. That's the only way to live, man. That's fucking great. That's, that is so like when you buy a 90k set though in that moment are you actually saying to yourself like this is an investment

that's gonna pay off or are you like man fuck it let's go with the 90k set and hope it works and then after the fact after the fact when it's successful it's easy to say it was invested in myself and i planned this all out but when when you bought it, were you actually thinking that? Um, that's a good question. When I bought it, I, I, I was unsure. I didn't know anything about podcasts and I, and I never hosted one. So I had no idea. Um, it was, that was a, that was a big leap. That one was a big leap. Right. I also remember after we built it, like set completed, we didn't shoot our first podcast until a year later. So for an entire year, I'm like, well, I look, come into my garage. I go, there's 90 K at the door. Like, yeah.

That's like, again, for the normal people, it's like, you go buy a exercise machine and the clothes to work out in. And then you never go. The only difference is yours is a hundred thousand dollar movie set or entertainment set it's like you have to do something with it bro yeah yeah yeah no it's good motivation though and when you did get on your grind that obviously worked so congrats man as always shit's uh shit is always going up every time we talk to you so i hope so i hope so movies movies is next like i hope i hope the next interview is you uh you know doing a major major release.

And maybe you'll be alongside The Rock or whoever knows what's next. Wait, Logan. I got something for you guys. I can't say it yet. But if it happens, I want to come on the show to talk about it first. You got it, man. Anytime you want to give us the exclusive, we're here, bro. Yeah, you guys are the best, dude.

Thank you, man. All right. What else we got? I was going to ask you how quarantine's going. I mean, you're pretty new in a relationship, right? Are you guys together in quarantine? Yeah, man. She's upstairs, and I got a text from her 10 minutes ago that said,

hurry back with a tongue emoji. Oh, shit. Why don't you just bring the computer up there and fucking... No, I was going to say, you should start OnlyFans and shit, Logan. You want to get rich? OnlyFans. I bet you could get some OnlyFans cash. Oh, I guarantee.

If Logan starts jerking off on the internet, people will be buying it left and right. Oh, no, no. Let me pitch you something, bro. Okay. Okay, here's the billion dollar idea okay so only fans primarily hot young women are luring men to come in and see them naked so i'm gonna start a new app it's called only mans and it's just me and a bunch of dudes doing the same thing that the girls are doing.

Charging the women to see our hot nude bods. All right. Well, you can do only mans. I'm going to do, you're going to have to compete with me. It's called Lonely Fans. And it's the guys who don't want to pay the money to see those chicks. And we just get together and we talk about shit. That's cool.

That's fucking cool. That's actually a better idea. I'm going to invest in that one. All bro we appreciate it dude go go get up there and uh keep her happy all right all right you guys are great i'll talk to you soon stay safe and healthy look at what you see in her face The mirror of your dreams Make believe I'm everywhere Give it in the light

Written on the pages is The answer to a never-ending story I Reach the stars Lie a fantasy Dream a dream And what you see will be Blood again, there's vagrants still will be the answer to

a never ending story ah ah ah story ah ah Soaring