KFC Radio - Meet Me In Miami, The State Fair, and Dean Norris

Episode Date: September 10, 2019

Something terrible happened in the parking lot of Target, the weak link in the Patriots offense, the Jets and Mets going where no team has gone before, the point of life, and when you should run red lights. Voicemails: The State Fair, How Do You Want To Die, How Old Is Too Old. Dean Norris brings by some Schraderbrau to talk Breaking Bad, El Camino and Under The Dome.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's another edition of KFC Radio. It's presented by New Amsterdam Vodka. Vodka. Navi in the house. New Amsterdam Vodka with the sexiest vodka bottle you'll ever see. Pink Whitney's. You know what? I'm OG og i'm og new amsterdam i like my vodka just vodka i don't need any pink lemonade in it fuck you ryan whitney but if you like that pink lemonade style the pink whitney's are now available i believe it was like 8.99 in like

middle america i think it was like 15.99 in uh you know the real world uh and also i was like wrong about these because i thought it was like a bottle of vodka mixed with lemonade it's just like lemonade flavored vodka it's still like a you're still getting liquor yeah because i remember it was such a good deal and i was like this is just a bottle of mixed drink and then i then i had it and i was like oh no no no this is like drinking vodka that's just pink. Yeah, it's like infused with pink. Yes, that's it.

That's it. It's like when you have the – at a bar, they have it like soaking in like one of those little tubs with the – that's what this is like. It's the good good. But it's – the regular vodka too is as smooth as it gets. We do shots of it. We have it mixed. We have it – you're going to have like a martini with it. It says quality

vodka as you can get and very affordable. So go get that New Amsterdam vodka. Get your Pink Whitney's. No matter how you like it, New Amsterdam does it right. I had a moment today. And actually, this is good for everybody. Literally almost everybody here at Barstool Sports. But it particularly felt good for your boy.

I got on the elevator on the second floor. Going down. Obnoxious, but whatever. I got on the elevator on the second floor. Going down. Obnoxious, but whatever. I don't have a card. I can't get through a certain door to get into our own building. So I couldn't even get to the stairs. So I had to take the elevator. Because Pete won't give me a fucking card.

Pete, give me a fucking card, man. I heard we're going to pretend you're an intern to get you a card. Yeah, Spider was like, this is fucking crazy. I'll just pretend you're an intern an intern to get you a new card. Yeah, Spider was like, this is fucking crazy. I'll just pretend you're an intern. We'll get you a new card. Or you could just not pretend and say, we've got a guy who's been here for a fucking decade who would like to just be able to get into the building. I came here Sunday.

I just had to stand there for a while and knock on the glass. And you know who answered the door? Pete! Like, yeah, this wouldn't be a fucking problem if you just gave me a key card, you asshole. How much could it possibly cost? I feel like we light money on fire here. Light it on fire. A key card.

Private jets flying around and all sorts of shit. Hiring, bringing entire new humans here. I just want a card. So I get on the elevator on two, which, like I said, it is an obnoxious move. And I could see. So I get on. There's these, which, like I said, it is an obnoxious move. And I could see. So I get on. There's these three women, and their conversation stops. And I thought it was going to be like, really, dude?

Really? Getting on the second floor? You couldn't walk down? And this woman, she's like a little older. She's got a very, like, stylish haircut, like very short, almost like ScarJo-esque. Really short. Swoop in the front. Wearing some fancy clothes. She just stops.

Dead conversation. Is everybody on your floor this good looking? She said, is everybody on your floor good looking? She's taking note that every time someone gets on at the second floor that it's good looking. like she's she's taken note that every time someone gets on at the second floor that it's good looking and i go i'm like looking around like you just made my day and uh her friends like start laughing kind of like you could tell this is like she's like she's

like the cougar she's like flirty you know and they're like ah like you know janice is at it again i i can't remember i don't remember her name but she did give me her name she puts her hand out like we shake and um she's like yeah like seriously every time we stop there it's just and i was like wow you really made my day and the doors open and we start to go off and i'm like thanks so much. That was great. And she goes, what are you, about 24, 26? And I go, be still my heart. I'll kiss you right now, lady. And I was like, me? No.

I'm 34. And at this point, we're walking out of the building now. And she dead ass, no exaggeration, goes, that's how old my last boyfriend was. This chick is a little mix. Yo, begging for the dick. And again, I'm telling you, little like Silver Fox. So we introduced her. So she said, I'm 50 years old.

My last boyfriend was 34. Very fancy dress. I'm sure it was a designer bag. I think I got a shot at a sugar mama, man. And also, by the way, then she did,

as we really went our separate ways, said, you didn't answer the question about like, is everyone on the floor? Good looking. I said, I don't know about everybody else, but I am.

Oh, you, I'm just, I mean, look, it's nice. The jacket is a nice touch. My,

my, I need a haircut. So the hair is actually like long right now. We haircut, so the hair's actually long right now. We kind of have the same haircut, me and her. If you're watching on Barstool Gold, just give this a once over and tell me. Stand up. Just stand up. Just tell me.

If you were a 50-year-old woman, would you not want to fuck this? Would you not only want to fuck this, but wouldn't you maybe pay for it, too? It's an outfit. You look nice. I don't know. Do the clothes make the man? Do the man make the clothes? I don't know.

All I know is I'm going to fuck this woman and she's going to pay me for it. You want to get a glimpse of this? Go to Barstool Gold. BarstoolGold.com slash KFC. I think that... And I can do that now. I can fucking do that now. She's like senile or delusional.

I mean, let's just be honest. She was with it. She was lucid. I don't think so. No, no, no, no. I was there, John. Look, it's not a criticism to you. You look fantastic today.

It is the floor. If you're getting stopped at the second floor remotely often, most of the time it's people who haven't showered in three days in t-shirts and sweatpants. Yeah, I mean, I'm trying to be generous here. On this whole floor, there are maybe six people who are trying to dress up.. Yeah, I mean, I'm trying to be generous here. On this whole floor, there are maybe six people who try and dress up. I was going to say, I'm trying to be generous here. There's about six people who I think would stop a 50-year-old cougar in her tracks to make a comment. The rest is people dressed up like cowboys and a bunch of guys that we call the fat pen.

And people who just absolutely do not give a fuck about their appearance right so it's you're you are so if you care about your appearance you're in the minority barcels definitely definitely but like i don't know because the people who don't care about their appearance pull off like a look but they still but they care about their appearance yes it's not a traditional like i'm i'm with the fashionable times it's like I'm wearing this outfit. This is what I wear. Yes. This is my thing. Yes.

Yeah. You know, like YP definitely cares what he looks like, but it's not going to be, you know, like this. Yeah. He looks like a kindergartner in gym class. Right. His big daddy. Yeah.

But then, so let me ask you this. What's more likely? This. Serendipitous elevator on which every single time it stops it's one of the six out of 200 people that she sees or she just wanted it in and just wanted to holler at your boy that one, that's true too

she definitely could have done that would you do it? how old was she? she was 50 how old did she look? you know, if her hair she had a silver fox thing going. She didn't have like grayish hair. I would have even said younger because she was like in shape.

And the haircut really like – it was a stylish – it wasn't like a, I'm a mom. I need to cut my hair short. It was like I'm going for a look here. So – Do moms get their hair short? Is that a thing? Yeah, yeah, definitely. When you get like the mom, like the – it's like the –

I know the stereotypical like I want to speak to the manager haircut. That's just like a – Yeah, it's usually like I can't do my hair in the morning anymore because, like, I have, like, so many fucking kids. I see. And my life sucks, so I just chop it off. Or, like, I need to change, you know. This woman, I would have guessed, like, in her 40s, which is not – you know, that's not that big of a difference if you're 50. But I'm just getting this overwhelming vibe that she will pay me for sex.

I just think that she's one of these high society Manhattan bitches who's just like, come on over here. They don't even come unless they paid for it. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I need a financial responsibility. I need a financial investment in this dick. If I said, no, you know what? I really like you. You don't have to pay me.

She'd be like, get the fuck out of here. I mean, I'm thinking I'm ready for the next stage in life which is to be a sugar baby i think i'm ready for that would you tell you what website huh would you sign up for a website uh anonymously well no i mean no one's gonna pay for a sugar baby they haven't seen his face yet no but like you know maybe we can we like link up anonymously and then i send you like private messages with my face and my dick i'm saying i don't want to be i don't want someone to be able to go on a sugar baby website and see kfc on sugar baby websites the pigs their pictures are there i imagine right like a sugar like an actual sugar baby website probably but i'd also imagine there's

a way to do this that's my time and something like that i don't know what she looks like yeah i mean it makes why don't you just do it? Just openly be like, yeah, that's me. I'm a sugar baby now. Lean into it. Yeah, that's me on that website. That is my going rate. I will hang out with you, probably fuck you, for that amount of money. It's enticing because what's currently going on is just not worth it at all.

What's that? I had such a fucking week i'll tell you what the real problem is right now my kids shay is a fucking snitch that's what she is so let me tell you about the day i had the other day i've been talking about her for a while now my nanny's been away for three weeks she's finally back but it was three straight weeks of trying to juggle the kids taking days off me, me, baby mama, back and forth, transition, you take them at day, I take them at night, this weekend, I got that weekend, every other day, yada, yada, so I had the kids the other day, and I wake up in the morning, and I'm

like, all right, we're gonna go get some new scooters, they're into scooters now, they got two at their mom's house, I'm gonna go get some scooters. I walk outside. There is another fucking boot on my car because I just refuse to pay tickets. Why? I don't know. I want to sit down with a psychologist. There's like a psychological block where I'm just like I think I just – I disagree with the notion of parking tickets and I just will not pay it. I don't know what it is. I look at them.

I'm like pay it now when it's $30 or it's going to be $75 by tomorrow, $100 after that and you'll get a boot eventually. I just don't do it. I mean, the real reason is I don't have any money, but I just cannot bring myself to pay for tickets and then they come by and I don't know what they do. They must just be able to run

your plate. They must just drive down my block and they must have a gun or something they can zap easily because it's not not like you it's not like i'm legally parked again no it's not like i'm illegally parked they're writing a ticket and they're running my plates and they see that i'm legally parked oh really i'm not i don't get a ticket for where i'm parked well they've probably written 20 tickets and remember your car now and they go this guy but they don't know if i haven't paid it yet i mean the amount of tickets you get I just think that they've probably got you on.

You can't just boot somebody if they're paying their tickets. They have to know that it's unpaid. But I mean, you get so many tickets that they just remember. And they go, yeah. I don't think they run every car that's on the block. But I think that they recognize your car and go, yeah, he's gotten $25,000 in the last month. He probably doesn't pay them, too. Crazy.

And so I walk outside. and now I obviously can't. Not only can I not take them to the store, I can't get to the police department because I have the kids. So I have to have my neighbor watch them for, like, 20 minutes while I grab an Uber over to the police department to pay my tickets. So a quick $420. I'm back in action. We hop in the car. We drive to— I have some lunch. We hop in the car.

I drive to Target to get scooters. I hate Target. My body, much like the parking tickets, my body rejects Target. I walk in there, and the Target I go to is like in the hood. It's just a disaster of an experience. And I got like both the kids. I got to get the scooters. I got to get helmets.

I got to buy the clothes. Keeganegan is just he's shopping on his own he's just walking grabbing things going this one this one and i'm just putting them back i'm sweating i'm hot freaking out and i just had leftover quesadillas only a night old but it's the only thing i can think happened and i just puke all over the parking lot of Target. All over. I put the kids in the car. I strap them in. And I was like, all right, I can do this.

No way. And I throw up. You know when you just ate, too? It's almost like choking coming back up because it's so solid. I puke all over the fucking floor of Target.

To the point that a woman walking by... Wait, the floor of Target or the parking lot? The ground. In the parking garage. To the point that a woman walking by wait the floor of target or the ground like in the parking garage to the point that a woman walking by sees me and just gives me an entire fucking carton uh like canister of like baby wipes like wet naps just gives me the whole thing like

you need this for what you're gonna clean up the parking lot well no but you know i don't know you're a fucking mess when you throw up i'm got my eyes are watering, and she's just like, here you go. But then I'm good. So whatever it was, I hadn't been drinking. I wasn't sick. Otherwise, it was just like one and done. I think it was those quesadillas. But now I have told Shay she's obsessed with the idea of this boot.

I was like, oh, there's a boot on the car. So what's a boot? And she sees me throw up everywhere. And she's a fucking narc now. So, like, I'm, like, dead man walking here. Like, later that night I get a text from their mother being like, Shay said you were putting your head down at the store and you were sick. I was like, you little fucking snitch.

I was like, yeah, yeah,itch. I was like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I threw up on the floor of Target. Yeah. And then the kids were together with their grandmother. Their mom's mom. And Shay said that daddy had a boot on his car and needed to go to the police

man. No way. It's like, Shay, you gotta learn to go to the policeman. No way. It's like, Shay, you gotta learn to shut the fuck up. I mean, that's partly on you. You gotta know a boot. The puke is the puke, but the boot, you can't be telling kids about boots. Yeah, well, that's so funny.

So, I walk outside and I'm like, ah, I got a boot. Like, we're gonna go later in the day. Daddy's gotta fix this problem. Weeping. walk outside and i'm like ah i got a boot like we're gonna go later in the day daddy's got to fix this problem weeping i started laughing i was like hey it's okay and then when the the they came to like take it off she was we threw a party she now she asked me every day you got a boot on your car is there a boot she likes the daddy how poor is he right now daddy you get your car repoed yet you gotta go to the impound daddy so that's like where i've been at it like oh and then today would have been the icing on the fucking cake i uh i wanted to take the shuttle and the subway and i

needed a new metro card and not one machine was accepting cards everything either said unable to read card or i dipped my card and just nothing happened so i just hopped the fucking turnstile and there was a cop right there and he was just looking the wrong way and he just turned back as like my feet hit the ground and i was like here we go icing on the cake i'm about to get arrested for some like misdemeanor turnstile hopping that would have been and i like looked like they were they were in a spot like i don't know they were doing it on purpose but they were like in a spot on the shuttle where like you couldn't see them i was like all right coast is clear fuck this i was like i'm justified i'm trying to i'm trying to

give you my money mta you just won't let it happen i hop over and i hit and i see them and i was like they almost should have just arrested me by my face they should have been like you i didn't see what you did but you either have drugs on you or you hopped the turnstile or you just killed somebody like your face is saying it all that would have been the icing on the fucking cake me getting uh you know i had a friend like that who did kind of like what you did where you like i was trying i had a friend who would have run red lights if he deserved if he if he deserved the green he would just go what does that yeah he'd be like that's like a stanza thing i deserve the green jerry it's like if if he was alone in the world he would have hit that green like it's like someone's turning and

taking it right so they slow down yeah and you don't get i i was there i kind of like that idea yeah you know it was when he told me that when he he first told me, I take reds if I deserve the green. I'm like, what the fuck does that mean? And then as he explained that, I was like, you know what? You're speaking my language. That kind of makes sense. I might sign up for that. It could be anything.

Just someone driving slow, someone taking a turn, someone changing lanes, someone broken down, whatever it is. If that affected his ability to get to the green light, which he rightfully should have been at, he takes the red. How about when you're turning left and the person in front of you doesn't go to the middle of the intersection, allowing you to get into the middle of the intersection?

I mean, that's infuriating. Dude, once this goes red, I can still go. I can go with you, too. Yeah, like, let me in, dude. And you're honking, and they're like, it's red. I'm like, I know it's red. I know there's cars coming. I'm not asking you to kill yourself.

I'm asking you to just get out there a little bit. I like that. Deserve the green. Rightfully, if I rightfully earned that green, it's mine. But then did he get? No, it's never happened. I mean, in general, 99% of the time you run a red light, you're good. Unless they got the camera.

Fuck that. That's another thing, by the way. I won't pay that ticket. I don't pay any tickets. But if you mail me a ticket, is it Chappelle or Chris Rock? I will mail you a picture of $100. If you don't catch me, you don't get my money. But I think I'm going to start.

That's what I need in my life. Start running red lights recklessly. Yeah, that would be smart. I couldn't believe. What do they do when they boo you? They put that thing on the windshield too? I saw you just driving with that? I mean, what are you going to do?

It's hard to get off. But thank God it actually poured rain that day and it all came off in the rain. Wait, so they don't – they just do that to be a dickhead? I think they do. I thought they do that in lieu of a boot. They do the boot and that? I think they do that so you know you've been booted because if you try to drive with the boot it destroys your car so if you don't see it and you just hop in and you start to drive it would like destroy your your axle so this is like in the field

division you can't not see it and i think also just be a dick i'll be honest the the sticker is worse than the boot yeah i would imagine so i've been booted before i've never had a sticker though yeah well the sticker uh the only reason last time I got rid of the sticker is because I got in a car accident. The person who clipped my door. And then they just replaced, like, the whole thing, I think. They need to fix the whole thing. You do not have a very good car. I got car bad, car mojo.

And I said it before. I had, like, a, I don't know, a 30 or, no, 16-year run. And then, like, the past couple years, terrible, terrible car luck, and terrible everything luck. I can't do sports anymore. I'm out on sports. I'm absolutely done on sports. Between the Mets blowing that game where they were 806-0, a six-run lead giving up seven in the ninth,

and then a mere two weeks later the jets have a game in which they have four turnovers with six points off of four takeaways they lose a game that they were 177 and three in 177 six in general like everyone who's ever had fucking plus four on the turnovers 17 177 and six. It was like three percent of the time they lose. And somehow the Jets do that in what is basically like. I mean, I don't want to overreact and I don't want to get crazy. But like if you want to throw around the C word on the Jets right now, I would I would be OK with that.

Because you can't you can't lose to the Bills at home week one in the fashion that they lost. Blowing a 16 point lead,, 16-0 halfway through the third because you don't have a kicker and you don't have anyone else on defense who can stand up besides C.J. Mosley after he goes out. And your quarterback, who's supposed to be taking a step forward, basically takes a huge step backwards. I mean, it would be crazy, but crazier things have happened. No kicker feels a lot like the Mets bullpen.

Yes. Even if you can fix everything else it's gonna come down to that foot and it'll find as soon as you miss the the extra point like somehow we're fucked and then when he missed the kick like we're fucking done what is the point and like what is the point for any what is the point in my life right now what what should i be doing with my life i i tried the marriage thing didn't work out for me right so like i found someone so much so that i was like let's commit forever and let's procreate twice and that that bombed it didn't work out so now what now i'm gonna now i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna i'm gonna engage with other other women who I know already. Pretty much every relationship you ever have, 99.9% of them are going to end in catastrophe.

You're going to break up with that person, right? And then the idea, the hope is that you find the one person where it doesn't end in catastrophe and you get married. Well, I've already done that and it didn't work, so I'm not going to do that again. Ipso facto, thereby, I know that every relationship I'd ever even try to engage in will end in disaster, will end in a breakup. So why would I do that? I'm not going to pursue anything romantically. The only thing I get any sort of satisfaction or happiness out of are my sports teams. That's clearly never going to happen. I mean, literally never going to happen.

You look at what the Patriots are doing. That's always what's going to happen. The Yanke never going to happen. You look at what the Patriots are doing. That's always what's going to happen. The Yankees are going to go win the World Series this year. The Patriots are going to win the Super Bowl. The Patriots already won the Super Bowl, so it's actually a Patriots and Yankees sandwich with the bread being the Patriots, Super Bowls, and the fucking meat being the Yankees. I'm too old to go out and party. Nobody – I mean once you're fucking 35 and you have – everyone has wives and kids. You don't have friends. You don't go out and party. Nobody, I mean, once you're fucking 35

and you have, everyone has wives and kids, you don't have friends, you don't go out with them. And, you know, all I have is this fucking job where like I can't stand being around you guys because you're all happy for all the reasons that I just said I'm not happy. So what is even the point of living? I had my mental breakdown at 27

and I wrote that quarter life crisis blog. And now I think I'm doing it again. As I turn 35 this year. Where I ask you. What is the point? What is the point of watching these games? What is the point of investing myself into teams. That I have no control over?

Watching sports should be a mere. Source of entertainment. It should not be a source of happiness and satisfaction because you can't control it should not be a source of joy it should just be a source of i killed a couple hours by watching this other thing occur not watching this other thing occur and staking my entire worth on it and i mean yeah like i said the romance thing forget forget about it. All of that is just a fucking mess.

And I just got these kids who snitch on me. What is the point? Go get a burrow couch. B-U-R-R-O-W dot com. Slash KFC 75 bucks off a couch

It's really fucking comfortable So That's the point At least that You know what The couch The couch is really the only source Of happiness I have

Couch Clancy The one consistent thing I've had in my life That has always made me happy It's my couch And burrow couches Are the most comfortable And the most functional in the game consistent thing I've had in my life that has always made me happy. It's my couch. And burrow couches are the most comfortable and the most functional in the game. So the one thing you can always count on is sitting down and watching that game. The game may suck.

The couch doesn't. Pop on TV, or maybe you are happily married. You got to watch like the Housewives. That show may suck. The couch does not. And if you're happy and you're watching the Patriots or good teams, the game is great, the couch is great, everything's great. You can customize your materials, the size, the arms, the legs,

the width, the height, the length, all of it customizable. USB cords in there so you can charge your phone. It's a smart couch, it's a comfortable couch, and it's an affordable couch. Burrow.com slash KFC. B-U-R-R-O-W dot com slash KFC. 75 bucks off your next order and free shipping. And shipping a couch is expensive as fuck. So don't just think of it as like free shipping for a t-shirt.

Think of it as like under 250 bucks in your pocket. What's the point? The point is the point? The point is, the point is, Kevin, that sometimes sports are good. Sometimes. Just wanted to let you folks know that every once in a while, sports are pretty good. Kevin, don't leave. Don't leave. You got to hear this.

You got to hear this. You got to hear this. Because there's... All right, I'll talk to a little bit of everybody then. If Kevin doesn't want to hear this, I'm going to teach you guys a little lesson here. The New England Patriots last night... This is why sports are good. The New England Patriots last night were... You know, we went into the year and we were like, they gonna be so good this year they're gonna be great they're gonna be

great but you kind of always just say that and then when you see it actually happen what transpired was the new england patriots were they were like an instagram model who you're like well great i mean look she's unbelievable here with filters and things like that but there's no way in the real world she can look like that and then you meet her and she's even. But there's no way in the real world she can look like that. And then you meet her, and she's even better looking. She's hotter. The Patriots were incomprehensibly dominant. They were like watching, it was like watching like a fight in a movie where just it's the bully, and he's just knocking people out.

And he's just going, bam, one down. And he's going, now get up. Get up again. Get up again. And then they get up, and he's just going, bam, one down. He's going, now get up. Get up again. Get up again. And then they get up, and he goes, bam, and he knocks them down. It's get up again. Get up again. And then, bam, for four hours.

It's like it reminded me of like a kink.com video where just like the Steelers are just tied up and exposed, and there's nothing they can do to get out of it. And the Patriots are just walking around being like, I own you. I have a hard dick right now because this is so easy for me. I own you. There's absolutely nothing you can do. This Patriots team is so good that it's the best offense Tom Brady's ever had. The best player on the offense hasn't played yet.

And the offense isn't the best part of the team. It's the defense. The defense is the best player on the offense hasn't played yet, and the offense isn't the best part of the team. It's the defense. The defense is the best part. This Patriots team is so good that the offense, the weak link on the offense might be Tom Brady, and he's the best player to ever play the game of football. He might be the part that you go, ooh, that's the weak link on this Patriots team is Tom Brady.

And it's not a weak link at all. Don't get me confused by that. It's just if you were to make one, it could arguably be Tom Brady or Ted Karras because those snaps were little. I don't know. But the point is here, Patriots fans, is that you got to start dieting. You got to start doing pushups during commercial breaks. That's what my dad taught me.

It's how you get in shape. You do pushups during commercial breaks, do pushups in the morning, do pushups before bed, eat salads for lunch, maybe do a TV 12 diet. Stay away from nightshades. Stay away from tomatoes.

Don't enjoy your heirlooms because here is just a guaranteed fact. The New England Patriots and you are going to South Beach. Don't enjoy your heirlooms. Because here is just a guaranteed fact. The New England Patriots and you are going to South Beach. You're going to be down there. You're going to be in your teal t-shirts, baby, your white blazers. You're going to need to get a Rosetta Stone. You're going to need to learn to do cocaine because it's going to be a hell of a weekend. But the Patriots are going to Miami. And the thing that's really nice about being a Patriots fan is that there's

always something like, like we should be boring winning, like winning should be boring by now, but there's always something every year, be a good L, but there it's usually not, it's usually not an NFL team that keeps things interesting because we're way past that.

We don't, we play in a different league than you guys do. It's usually, it's not, it's rarely an NFL team, but there's always something to strive for. And this year, we're striving for our seventh Super Bowl, because, yeah, that'll be nice when the Pittsburgh Steelers have always said, oh, we got six, we got six.

Well, Tom Brady's going to do what you did in 100 years. He's going to do it in 20. And then it's also nice that we're going for an undefeated season. Bill wants it. Tom wants it. I want it. I have – I mean we're going – week nine will be the first time we have like even a threat.

So we're going into week nine 8-0. From there we'll see what's happening. It's a loaded back half. We'll have – I think Philly's in there. Chiefs are in there. Ravens are in there. There will be some tough games. But I think that this year we are looking,

we are striving for the undefeated season. And that's why sports are awesome. That's what it's all about, Kevin, undefeated seasons. You know that imagery of get up. Do it again. Get up. Do it again. That's me in life. I prefer to think of you as the kink.com guy, but sure.

I'm the kink.com guy. I've got the clothespins on my nipples. Yeah, yeah. I got that. You're very flexible. Your legs are spread. Spread eagle. Starfish.

Starfish. Just a soft dick because everything hurts so much. Yeah, and they got that thing. They got the ring that goes around like your dick and your balls. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're soft, but you're like squashed through. Yeah, it's a chastity belt. Okay, I got that on. I got the clothes pins all over me.

And I'm going to rip them off in a row. That's me. That's life every day. That's just life. That's Mets life. Single dad life. Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention, Rob Gronkowski's going to come back too. No doubt. Gronk's going to

come back. We're adding Antonio Brown and then Gronk's going to come back not because the Patriots need him, but because Rob Gronkowski doesn't miss a party and he's going to have FOMO. He's going to say, I've got to get in on this. Tommy, can you slot me in please? And Bill will say, you do it for five bucks? And then Rob will be like, absolutely.

I've been saving all my money for my NFL. I've been living off endorsements. I never spent a penny of a game check. I'll do it for six bucks, tops. See you in Miami, Camille. Where we have a hotel rented. The whole hotel, right? Yeah.

We'll be staying in a hotel, but it's just ours. That's going to be that that will be i'm literally i'm the patriots are literally going to make me go on a diet yeah for this now and then ipso facto i will be going on one because i don't want to be the fat one you know that's only four months away folks that super bowl will be that will be a like a a pivotal moment for barstool sports. Something will go wrong there. Someone's going to get fired at the Super Bowl where we own a hotel in South Beach.

Like on South Beach? Yeah, like someone's going to get arrested or something bad's going to happen. Might could be me. Might could be. But I feel like you would be okay. I feel like Dave would be like, what the fuck happened? You'd be like, bro, I mean, the Patriots are undefeated. That this that happened he'd be like okay cool yeah no i i think

i'm on fire because i'm i'm also of the like sense like i'll just i i think you can only get fired if you're like i don't want to do this i don't i don't want that to be my like if i got arrested like yeah i got fucking arrested yeah yeah like second I got arrested for Tom Brady if you're not like willing to turn into content then you'd be like well then we gotta let you go but if you're like I'm in

yeah I'll get arrested I don't give a fuck I've been arrested five times in my life get arrested fucking cakewalk get arrested as many rings as Brady's gonna win

yeah we've got that Tom Brady being the weak link that made things even worse like I was like this is bad but it's real bad how bad is it i didn't realize it's tom brady's the weak link

that i mean and again i want to stress tom brady is not a weak link but if you were talking about like the least 42 year old quarterback like even to even to kind of maybe even suggest that that that that makes everything so much worse. He had – I mean like watching the game – watching actually – I want people to make sure they understand that Tom Brady is not a weakling. But – because I was watching that game and having watched – I don't know. All I heard from that was that Fights thinks that Tom Brady is bad. Well, have they watched –

You heard it here first. Tom thinks – Having watched the NFL Sunday all week, or all week, all Sunday, I was like, everyone stinks. And then Tom Brady out there, and I saw him make last night like 12 throws that no one else I watched on Sunday could make. No one else could do it. Bro, I can think of one ball the entire Jets-Bills game that,

like it was the one he underthrew Robbie Anderson on, but it was like the one time he took a shot down the field. It was like one throw the entire game that it was the one he underthrew Robbie Anderson on, but it was the one time he took a shot down the field. It was one throw the entire game that was like, oh boy, here we go! The rest of it wasn't even complete or incomplete. They were all just like, meh, meh. Can't even recall anything from that game.

I mean, when you're, Kevin, stick with it, because when you're good, and you'll never be this good of course, but when you're good, and you'll never be this good, of course, but when you're good, oh, my God. I just don't get when people say that, and then say, like, it's not going to happen. No, it's not. Like, definitively, it's not going to happen. Right, okay.

Thank you for that. It's almost getting annoying when people are like, no, come on, it will. I'm like, stop, you're patronizing me. No, no, no. You're never going to do this. No, that will not happen. I mean, it's. You might win a Super Bowl. You might win a World Series, but you're never gonna do this. That will not happen. I mean, it's not out of the realm of possibility. It is out of the realm

of possibility. It will not happen. Not until I'm dead. You find me dead in the parking lot of Target. Did you rip a shot of vodka during that? I did. I did. How was it? It went down very smooth because New Amsterdam is that fucking good.

New Amsterdam, the official vodka of sports fans who are not from New England, who need a way to get through life. And the official vodka of ones who are from New England. And the official vodka of people who like to celebrate Sundays.

It's also the official vodka of the next KFC Radio Live. KFC Radio Live, September 18th. Tickets are on sale now. You can get your tickets. It is Wednesday, September 18th, 730. Doors open at like 6, 630. Come on out. Have some happy hour drinks.

Have a little dinner. Have a night, an evening with me and Feidelberg, assuming I'm still alive and or not incarcerated by that point. If not, we'll just talk Patriots the whole time. Do you guys like Patriots? Every time I brought them up on live shows before, very well received. So booed into a Bolivian. It should be a good time, though. It's a blog come to life.

It's interactive, audience interaction. It's videos. It's audio. There's some of my most fun things we do. Yeah, it really is. It's interactive, audience interaction. It's videos. It's audio. There's some of the visuals we do. Yeah, it really is. It's a great night. It's a lot of fun. It's like especially now that we're getting more comfortable and we know what we're doing.

We're going to answer the Internet. You can submit your questions. We'll play the viral videos and take a look at the most recent memes and all the viral stories. It's everything from Barstool Sports come to life on stage for a night, and then we all go out afterwards and have a good time. So go to kfcradio.com slash live is the easiest way. It's kfcradio.com slash live. Get your tickets.

And today we have Dean Norris on the show. He is Hank from Breaking Bad. You may have heard of him. He is, when I say he's Hank from Breaking Bad, I don't mean that's the character he played on Breaking Bad. You may have heard of him. He is, when I say he's Hank from Breaking Bad, I don't mean that's the character he played on Breaking Bad. I mean he's Hank from Breaking Bad. We drank the Schrader Brow beer, which is the beer from Breaking Bad come to life.

We recapped everything about Breaking Bad. We talked Game of Thrones. It's a great like television combo beer conversation great guy cool dude cannot uh speak highly enough about him so dean norris on the show later but first is the coolest voicemails your stupid fucking questions brought to you by scent bird you want to smell good you want to switch up your scent you want to not uh spend a billion dollars on like a on a bottle of cologne this big that's going to last you like an eternity the thing about it is like you buy a bottle of cologne this big and by the time you get halfway

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Vice, B.C. Colt from Nebraska. You guys are probably wondering why the fuck I call so often. But I have another question for you. I went to Minnesota this weekend to visit a buddy of mine. And went to the state fair. Met up with a friend of his that had some girlfriends with her as well. Ended up going home at the end of the night after we went to the bars with his friend's

sister and we're just laying in bed talking. We originally said we weren't going to hook up, but then we get to talking and she kind of said she was into some kinkier shit earlier in the day. Then we were just talking and kind of getting into some more physical stuff like that, and all of a sudden, out of her mouth, I hear, I'm the type of girl that's going to sit on my knees and look up at you with puppy dog eyes in my tongue waiting for you to come all over my face. Didn't know what to say at that point. I'm like, fuck it, we're going right now.

It's fucking happening. We said we aren't going to hook up, but change of plans. So my question is, what is the most wild or most thing that caught you off guard during sex, whether that be a move she pulled or something she said to you?

Viva. Lots to unpack, starting with the state fair. If you're in a state where you're going to a – but fuck that question, dude, and fuck a state fair. That's all we're going to talk about here. He made it sound like it was the event. If you are going to a state fair, you're a – I know Massachusetts has like the Big E or whatever,

something like that. And I think people go to it. But you're a fucking idiot. You're a loser. If you are at a state fair getting, what, corn dogs and fucking fried Oreos, fucking grow up. If you're above the age of nine, you go on the Gravitron 2000 and you eat some funnel cake and it's awesome.

And maybe you see some girls at the fair. That's what you do. You try to win some win a teddy bear like fucking knocking over milk bottles. Oh, that's great when you're like nine and from the 1940s. Yeah, but it's like if there is if there's a place at the event you're at

that is built out of hay. I'm out. Don't be at that place. Go somewhere else. If you are of the age where you are coming on girls' faces and or getting your face cummed on, you cannot go to the state fair as like your big night out. And that's just. Can you imagine? What do you guys want to do?

You want to go see the bull rides? No. No. The fuck do I give a shit about that? You want to go on a pony ride? You want to go throw darts at balloons? I also have this feeling of like Charlotte's Web, like there's prized pigs there and shit.

Oh, yeah. Oh, come see the biggest pumpkin in Minnesota. Look how big we got this ball of yarn. Fucking losers. Come try like the number one chili in the county. Suck a dick. I've been to the Iowa State. I was going to say, that's a big one, right?

Iowa State's got a huge one. It's a great time. It's so much fun. And they do have all that shit. You can drink at it too. Oh yeah, you can go to a bar. You guys remember Sheriff Rick?

Well, he's a cake maker now. Come on over and try out Sheriff Rick's marble cake. Shut the fuck up, you fucking hillbilly suck bag. There's no shot I would go to any state fair at all. You say, how do you die at a state fair annually?

Be it from food poisoning or ferris wheel brakes or some shit. Ferris wheel brakes, rabid, feral pig attacks. It's a death trap to get lost in a fucking haunted house. A real person kills them because that's where they hang out. Like, there's, why would you go to a fucking state fair, you dork? I feel like there are people who, like, their entire year is built up to, like, bringing their number one cow to the state fair. Oh, Patty made a heck of a fondue for this. Patty, Patty's got her hair cut.

She looks like the son of a bitch you'd think she would. But boy, does she make a good peach cobbler. If that's what you like to do, if that's what your big event is, you need to take your shotgun that you definitely have in your barn, put it in your mouth, and pull the fucking trigger. You need to take that shotgun, get on your knees, open your mouth with puppy dog eyes, and put your fucking brains on the wall. Sit on your knees, put your tongue

out, put your brains on the fucking ceiling because you enjoy this state fair. Fuck out of here. How many kids do you think get kidnapped annually at the fucking Minnesota state fair? And you know what? They probably don't even notice. They probably don't even notice because you kidnapped number 10, 11, and 12.

You got a whole slew of them on the fucking farm building up the cows, pigs, and peach cobblers for the annual state fair. Fucking dork. Fucking losers. You can get laid at a state fair. Here's, they have their, like, uh, they'll do, like, every year they come back and, like, and here's a throwback for y'all.

Here's the homecoming queen from, from homecoming queen from Let's Kill Malcolm X. You all remember Patti LaBelle, right? Here she is in the same sash that still fits her back in the day when her and David Duke won homecoming queen may I direct your attention over here to the cross burning exhibit who's got the biggest cross that burns the brightest and the hottest oh my god Oh, my God. Anyway. To answer your question, when I was 16, my girlfriend told me to put my fingers in her ass, and it blew my mind.

Next voicemail. Hey, KFC, Fights, Superduser BC. I just had a little question for you guys you know thinking about all this recent um information about like knowing when you die and how old you're gonna you're gonna live to through those kind of tests you guys were talking about so i was wondering um what would be the most glorious way to go out like if you could choose the way that you died in the most extravagant fashion possible. How would it be? Thanks. Well, there's two.

I mean, I've answered this many times. If we're talking about like extravagant in the sense like I would want to die a hero or something. I would want to like stop a mass shooting or I would want to save some babies from a burning building. But if we're talking about just strictly extreme type of deaths, I want to jump into a tornado. Yeah. Mine's different. This one blog I wrote, I still always remember.

It was in Russia, I believe. And a guy got robbed by his friend in the woods. And they were doing sex stuff. They were doing sex stuff. It was deep in the woods because it was Russia, so they were doing gay sex stuff. So you got to go far away from there.

You got to really hide if you can do that. You're in Siberia. You can't be doing that at the fucking state fair. You're like in a golden high compound, you know? But the guy robbed his friend, and he tied him up to a tree, and he got eaten by an animal. I believe it was a bear. This is how you want to die? And the guy had – so he couldn't scream in the woods.

He shoved a dildo down his throat. I just remember like in the blog being like, come on, dude. It's your best friend. You couldn't even take the dildo out of his throat on the way out the door? Give the guy a shred of dignity when they find his dead body been mauled by a bear that's got a dick in his throat, too. Dick down the esophagus. But I just remember it being a very memorable way. This is how you want to go.

It's still like 10 years later, I'm still thinking about this guy. I want people to remember me. And they're like, yo, do you remember that guy in the woods with a dildo in his throat with a bear? His entrails were ripped out by a black bear. I want to live on forever. And if I have to deal with a a cock in my throat then so be it live on you shall if you are a fucking bear meal

with a dick down your throat yeah I've missed the bear bit off his dick but he had a different one down his throat I'll be in books and stuff it's just like I want everyone to do me a favor right now just on your podcast app

hit the backwards 15 seconds a couple times to when John said, yeah, mine's different. Knowing that he said that now, just know that he prefaced that with, yeah, well, mine's a little different. Let me take you on a journey. My answer is different than yours. He just chained up in the woods in Siberia with a cock in your throat and a bear paw through your gut. After some gay sex.

And you robbed me blind of all my shit. Honestly, I'm probably the only person in the world who remembers that guy. But I do. As long as I'm alive, I'll be telling people about it. And he'll live on forever. You can confidently say you're the only person to ever answer this question in manner like the hey how if you could pick how you're gonna die how would it be and everyone's like oh like i would jump out of a plane into the like the caribbean ocean or i'd like i'd die like skiing mount everest john wants to go to russia get tied up to a tree

mouth fucked by a dildo and eaten by a bear i I mean, if you're not signing up for that, I don't know what's wrong with you. Give me a contract. I'll fucking put my John Hancock on that right now. Here you go. Fill that out however you want to. I'm agreed to it. I'm in. The way you pitched it was so beautiful.

How could you say no? An offer you can't refuse. M can't refuse you're getting your large intestine tickled by a dildo next please hey kfc fight super sauna federal bc this is nick from ohio was calling uh i got a 10 month old daughter and we're always kind of driving either from her mom's place to my place or my place to the babysitter or daycare, back home, whatever it might be, really listening to KFC radio while I'm in the car. And as she's getting a little bit older and more impressionable, I was kind of wondering when I have to stop doing that so that she's not rattling off

some of the stuff that's coming out of your guys' mouths when she's hanging out with the kids at daycare and preschool in a couple years. So let me know what you think. Such a great question to follow. You're going to get mouth-fucked and eaten by a bear! Hey, when should my 10-month-old daughter

stop listening to this show? It's very appropriate on all angles. I got my snitch daughter right now. If she was listening to KFC radio, she would go to school or she would go

to her grandma's house and be like, daddy gets mouth fucked by bears. What? What? Yeah, I heard it on the man

that talks on the, but like, like they pick up on the weirdest shit. Like when, when we get in the car, Shay sometimes will say, put the man on and and she means sports radio.

She doesn't know who or what, but I put on WFAN. She's like, yeah, there you go. So she's even picking up on those things. Right now, we're in a huge Timber phase. Yeah, I saw that. It's great. I like Timber. Yeah, it's a good song.

I go, it's going down, and she yells, I'm yelling Timber! It's pretty fun. But, you know, she's almost four. You're 10 months. I would say two. So KC Radio is officially two years plus, two years and up. Well, no, two years below. Right, right, right, right.

Yeah, zero to two. Zero to two years old. I think, I mean, I don't know Tell her to download and rate and subscribe Five stars, that little bitch better give us five stars But, uh Yeah, I guess when she can start saying things But even before that You start to soak things in, I think

Yeah, you're soaking Fucking funny people Yeah, but we're talking, I mean, Matt, could you imagine if you had A young impressionable child during the great spit era of KFC radio? Like that era where every single episode. Is that era over? Oh, great.

We haven't talked about spitting in mouths in at least a year. It's been quite some time. Don't get me wrong. That's still very much happening. We're just not talking about it anymore. Right. It's almost old hat. We're on to the next thing.

Getting eaten by bears and mouth fucked by dildos. But yeah, imagine if you're a two-year-old who's like, Goo Goo Gaga spit in my mouth. What was your first word? Spit. Yikes. I think two. Is that about right?

I feel like that's when you start to kind of babble and you start to kind of be aware of what's happening. Yeah, I mean that's a safe area to not accidentally pick something up. You could probably get away with another year, but let's call it safe. Especially this guy sounds a lot like me. You're dropping your kids off at mom's house and other houses, and it's like you just can't raise snitches i really i

just can't emphasize this enough it's like oh how was dad's house like oh it was great like he you know gave me new amsterdam vodka and band-aids it's like i didn't need you to say that come on what happens here stays here let's go all right last voicemail of the day is brought to you by MVMT. Where are my glasses? I gotta get my spectacles to read this ad here. Let me ask you something. How much time do you spend in front of a digital screen?

For me, I know. See how well I can read with my MVMT glasses? And I'm looking good. Could you imagine? Could you imagine if I was wearing these today on the elevator i think i would have fucked that old lady right down in there i think that sugar mama i think she would have taken that dress off right there on the spot and kicked her friends out of the elevator right down in there and said see those glasses i need to fuck you and i have this dildo and i got a pet bear back home. I can't recommend these

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It's definitely an aggressive move, but if you got a big night or you want to make a statement or whatever it may be, you pop these on and people are going to notice. Also, if you, you know, not everyone can pull it off. It's definitely an aggressive move. But if you got a big night or you want to make a statement or whatever it may be, you pop these on and people are going to notice. Also, if you wear the watch, they've got the most affordable, high-quality watches in the game. All sorts of different materials, colors, bands, frames, faces, whatever it may be. All the different accessories at MVMT are the hot shit. Go to MVMT.com slash KFC. You get 15%

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so i'm 25 and heavy set borderline dad bod just fat guy um met a 37 year old semi-professional salsa dancer who I'm getting along with really well. And she says she doesn't want to date me because there's such a giant age difference, but also she wishes that we had not such a giant age difference because she thinks I'm super cool and she's way out of my league and I'm just trying to figure out how to lock this down.

So if you guys could help me out, that would be pretty cool. Thanks, Diva. I mean, this is great. We've got this guy's fate in our hands right now. First of all, I think he's very much in. I think, first of all, there's something to – I'm just going to go ahead and assume this is a Latina woman who – I think they kind of want, like, the fat guy, basically.

You remind them of a don yeah exactly exactly right yes they're there i mean you can just picture it right close your eyes you think it's some like sexy salsa dancer and she's sitting on the lap of a fat guy with a uh in miami button uh unbuttoned shirt like belly out a cigar, and he's like on top of the world, and she loves him. So I think you're kind of already in. I think if she's even saying this stuff, like, you know, I wish there wasn't an age gap because you're so awesome, like that means she wants to just forget about the age gap.

She already kind of is on board with giving up, forgetting about the age gap. She just needs to kind of be pushed. So how do you go about that? I don't even know if you have to go about it. Age is nothing but a number, baby. Age is a mindset. He said he's 25. She's 37.

That's not that crazy. In a way, it's... If we can walk into a bar, we're in the same club. Everyone in the same club is the same age. If I'm already doing whatever I'm doing and it's attracting you, the age gap is only a problem because a 25-year-old would be like a fuckboy who's driving you crazy, and then we wouldn't be in this boat.

So, yeah, there's an age gap, but I'm clearly acting more like a 45-year-old if you're down with me. So I'm the – how do you describe it i'm the heavier set dad bod borderline fat you're fat dude you're a you're a fat 25 year old and you know what that's a 25 year old thing to try and not own it yeah just you tell yourself i'll tell you what the minute this guy just proclaims himself fat she won't even be talking about the age gap because you will just – a whole new world will open up where you're just like, I'm the fat guy. But guess what? I must be like swagged out and funny and charismatic because I got 37-year-old – by the way, what does a professional salsa dancer even mean?

It means she's probably pretty poor. I mean are there like salsa competitions that she's winning uh or does that mean you are a stripper like professional dancer stripper um i think this guy's already already pretty much like 95 of the way home i think doing anything too drastic might actually hurt your chances yeah i think just keep doing what you're doing yeah i give bad dating advice so much just be normal just be yourself but but in this case i really think it makes it the point really is be yourself because it's working if you got a girl right right who's already she's self-conscious about the age gap like yeah in a perfect world

you would be 38 or 39 a couple years older than her and she wouldn't even be thinking about this the fact that she's like bugging out about it means it sucks that he's younger because he's so awesome yeah so just keep being awesome yeah just lie to her you're like ah joking i was actually i'm 45 not 25 look i'm fat i can't be fat if i'm 25 25 year olds are skinny come on i actually also it's a dicey move but i think if like push comes to shove or if it's ever like she really is like there's a problem with this age gap, I think almost you pull the trigger then and be like, all right, you know what? Listen, I can't change my age. If you're going to hold that against me, you're not the one for me anyway. You walk away, and I think she'll be coming back for me.

Oh, I like that. It's a real ballsy move move but i feel like if you do that by the time you're walking out the door she'll be right behind you because you know what it would be a very mature move and not a very 25 year old move to say well you know what you're a wonderful girl but obviously you're gonna let outside forces like uh you know you're gonna let things that i can't control affect us and so i thought you were more mature than this yeah i thought you were much more mature than to let society dictate what ages we can date i like that i like that i like that a lot also be like i'm young like an ox i can fuck all night long

all right that's some good advice right there that guy he's gonna end up marrying that professional salsa dancer let me tell you what. Yeah, they're going to go on welfare together. Let's talk to Dean Norris. You know him as Hank Schrader, DEA agent from Breaking Bad, the greatest television show of all time. And in speaking to him, it only reaffirmed my thoughts. Like, I forgot

about some of the greatness of that show. I know you've been re-watching it. I got to go back and re-watch it. We talk about the new Breaking Bad movie coming up. We talk about the comparison of Breaking Bad to Game of Thrones. We talk about Dranken Bears. We talk about Vince Gilligan. Just an awesome conversation all around. If you're a guy who likes TV, who likes beer, and who likes just hanging out and shooting the shit with the fellas, you will love Dean Norris.

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Bad when Hank was in the garage brewing it and now it's become a reality, which I think is very cool. I think there was a lot of that with Breaking Bad. I feel like Los Pollos Hermanos, people wanted that to be real, wanted to eat the chicken, eat the sauces,

there were t-shirts, and now the beer is real too. It's very cool for the Breaking Bad fans. Yeah, man. It's a blast. I kind of thought about it for a while. And then when the 10th year anniversary came up last year, I thought, oh, that's a good time to kind of bring it out. Good excuse to make some beer. Good excuse to make some beer. And we couldn't quite get it put together that quickly.

So now there's this – I can say it now because I think they've announced that the movie is actually coming out. Yeah. So it gave us another opportunity to have a reason to drink some beer. And, you know, you don't need an excuse for that, but anytime you can have one. And you got into brewing beer with the character, right? Yeah. That's when you kind of started it? Yeah.

I hadn't done it before, but I figured, you know, I should kind of check it out a little bit since I was going to be doing it. But, of course, the brewery that we work with, we have a Fig Mountain Brewery in Bealton, California. They're the ones who actually do the beer. But we went up there and gave them our version of what it should taste like and did a lot

of experimenting. Is that what we're calling it now, Dean? Is that what we're going to call it? As one does. Listen, babe, I was experimenting, all right? Leave me alone. Yeah. So we spent the night up there.

I believe it. We did that one summer, me and my friends. We did beer brewing and whatnot. Did you? I didn't know that. It was like home brewing. It was fun, but it's a hobby. You don't want to admit you're an alcoholic.

You're like, yeah. It's like a white lady cooking. When you get a glass of wine first, you get a couple to admit you're an alcoholic. You're like, yeah. It's like a white lady cooking. Like, let me get a glass of wine first. It's like, get a couple beers, start making a beer. Are you into the minerals as well? How much of this character is real? Yeah, no, I'm not into the minerals. Have you become a beer nerd through this?

Are you like a guy who's tough to have a beer with? No, I'm not that guy. My hops aren't that good. Yeah, yeah, no, I'm not that guy. My hops aren't that good. Yeah, yeah. No, I'm not that guy. I wish this was an IPA and it was November 6th. Right. No, I drink beer, so I'm good.

I drink anything from a Coors Light to a really nice- That's my guy. Whatever's there, baby. That's such an important trait. I'm a big fan of you drink whatever you want to drink. Right. You want to sit here and have like a girly pink whatever? Fine.

I don't care. Leave me alone. Let me drink my thing. Let me drink your thing. And if you can appreciate good beer and you can brew it and all pink whatever, fine. I don't care. Leave me alone. Let me drink my thing. Let me drink your thing. And if you can appreciate good beer and you can brew it and all that shit, fine. But if I want to just have a Bud Light, shut the fuck up. Leave me alone. And what we did with this beer, because this kind of goes to that,

is that I wanted to have the craft brew snob guys I wanted them to dig it. But I also didn't want it to be so fucking out there that a person who drank Stella would go what the fuck you know what I'm saying

so it's drinkability as they call it in the business so what you're saying is I can have 10 of these things and have a good night you can't oh it's high it's 6.2 so I can't have 10 of those so we wanted to kick the alcohol up a little bit and do those different things. And I said, look, guys, the only final direction I can give you for the beer is it's got to be silky smooth.

There you go. I'm just looking at the shirt here. I just noticed it right now. It's great. That's the original. Is it? That's great. He gave us those on the third season premiere party.

That's very funny. And so it's already starting to get holes in it and shit. Yeah, that's how you know us those on the third season premiere that's very funny party and uh so it's already starting to get holes in it and shit yeah that's how you know it's a good one your best t-shirts and sweatshirts all have holes and stains beer stains absolutely so is it weird for you when you said uh 10 years does that feel like like about right or shorter longer what's the vibe with the 10-year anniversary yeah that was weird man because it's like it was such an influential show for all of us in it, obviously. You know what I'm saying?

I mean, the world, but yeah, I can imagine being on it as well. And then all of a sudden it's like 10 years later, you're like, what the fuck happened in 10 years? But it was cool because we got to see everybody again and we did some rounds of chit-chatting and we went to Comic-Con and all that kind of stuff.

But it's uh yeah you know it just reminds you that uh it it it probably won't come around again in one lifetime maybe no maybe but probably you know there'll be another there's always another show that is this is the greatest of all time whatever but the way the way that show was the the way the time it came out the channel it was on yeah i mean none of that be replicated. Absolutely. And all that was so close to none of that happening. AMC was just starting. They weren't smart enough to fuck around with Vince Gilligan. They kept their mouth shut, let him do what he had to do.

Another network copy. Another network would have been in there. You know what I'm saying? It was their second show with AMC. All these things kind of came together. Nobody watched it at first. I was on it. I was on it.

Day one, before I worked here, I had my own website, just like a little blog. And I was like, this show, it's got the Malcolm in the Middle dad. It's going to be crazy. I was on it from day one. But you're right. It took a little while. It took a while. Yeah.

Yeah. And I think Bryan Cranston was nominated. There weren't even odds in Vegas, OK Vegas on him being nominated on the first year. No one even knew it, and he got nominated. I think that helped us stay on to the second season. By the third season, it was crooked. And then between that, the last and the other one, it turned into the fucking Rolling Stones. That's weird, though.

For you guys, you were only Rolling Stones rock, like, rolling stone rock stars really for that last, like, what, season and a half? Yeah, yeah. So you've been working on it a while, and all of a sudden you're fucking famous and, like, you know, the acclaim and all that shit. Yeah, at first it was like, channel what? 350, what? Who? That really blazed the trail in the sense, like, now I tell people, we talk about TV a bit on the show, and we're like, don't worry about the channel anymore. It doesn't have to be HBO, Showtime, 247.

It could be whatever. As long as it's a good show, it doesn't matter. Yeah, it's not going to be a channel pretty soon, man. I think everyone's just going to be streaming it, right? You're just going to be out there. It's going to be more expensive than cable because you're going to need seven. You're going to need like seven. It's going to at least be the same, right?

Everybody's going to save money, but they're not. But I think obviously that's what it's going to. But it's going to be interesting. I don't know that we're ever going to get, I mean, Game of Thrones was, but when's the next time

we get like a cultural experience where we all sit down on a Sunday night? Nothing ever did because a lot of people watched Netflix. But it did get to a cultural experience,

at least the last episode. Yeah, I mean, we had said that we think Game of Thrones was the demise of like, you know, Sunday night, 9 o'clock, whatever. You'll watch it on your own time,

and it can be huge, but it's not going to be that same discussion week to week and all that kind of shit. I think they're going to start going back that way a little bit. I know Disney Plus is going to do the week to week. I don't get why they don't do it. Even when they drop them, they drop them at like 4 in the morning.

If you're going to drop it, at least do it at like 6 o'clock or 8 o'clock. People are like, alright, we'll all watch this together. At least we'll get the first episode together. And then we'll go our own way. But it's very strange. But you mentioned Game of Thrones. I guess you can't really feel for them because you guys had the perfect ending.

But did you have those nerves going into the final season like they must have had? Yeah, yeah. I mean, you know, we always had nerves every season in Breaking Bad because we would read it and go, what the fuck? You'd never get better than that. You know? And then the second season, I'd go, fuck, that would really fuck

because you're not going to get better than that. Right. And then, oh, man. You just kept getting better and better. I mean, I don't know, but he was probably under the table. But his design kind of gave them fans what they wanted. He didn't get cute with it. He didn't get crazy with it.

It was just like good shit right there. Good shit, yeah. And that's just the way they did it. They would write themselves into a corner and then say, look, we've got to work our way out of this and not try to take an easy way out. It's like I don't like those sci-fi. I'm not a big epic because it's always like, oh, fuck, I got this coin. You know what I'm saying? You really have to figure out how to get out of it.

It was a very tangible, real show. There's no magic. There's no dragons. People died. Who was supposed to do it? Were you salty about not getting to catch Walter White? Because I believe we were talking about an interview do with conan i think the whole cast was on and i don't know whether it was in our

heads or not but you almost looked a little like surly about it it was right after i think you had died on the show and it was like as a do you do you care as an actor what what the script ends up playing out would you have liked to be you know i cuffed them yeah i kind of i mean i never went, kind of. I mean, I never went into the room with the writers. Everybody else did. I never went into the room with the writers and said, hey, man, I'm going to pitch my story. Because I'm like, they're way fucking smarter than me. Smart man. They're like, we, you know.

So I just, whatever he wrote. And he told me the end that, literally almost to the line, two weeks, two years before it. Oh, wow. He said, you're going to go out with dignity. That's the only thing you have left, and you're going to say, fuck you, and that's that. Such a great character. It was such a great character.

I'm re-watching now. I had to skip that scene. Yeah. It's so good. It's so hard to watch. Yeah. I mean, you smashed it. That might be one of the best scenes in TV.

Going through, I've seen so many scenes that I almost forgot. Yeah. I mean, you smashed it. That might be one of the best scenes in TV. I'm going through. I've seen so many scenes that I almost forgot. The one I love is the Walter White when he was at 6353 Juan Tabo Boulevard. Yeah. And he goes from pleading for his life to that. I was like, we really forget about that scene because it's so funny. And that's buried amongst 10 others. There's so many great scenes, but that's obviously one of the best. Yeah. Thanks, man. Yeah. And that show, it is, that's buried amongst like 10 others. There's so many, so many great scenes, but that's, I mean, obviously one of the best.

Yeah. Thanks, man. Yeah. And that, that showed it is, it's filled with, I can't tell you how many people come up to me and like, I've seen it 10 times. Literally. I'm like, what the fuck you got to do in your life? Now I like it.

Is it true? And you have not seen it once? Did I, I read that you had not watched Breaking Bad? No, I watched Breaking Bad. Oh, okay. There was some quote from some article that said, like, you intentionally did not watch it for a time. I intentionally tried not to read the script so that I could watch it as if it were me getting to see it like a –

obviously, I had to read my own stuff. Right. But I tried not so that I could sit there and watch it someday. This had read that you, like, had never watched an episode of the show. Get the fuck out of here. And I'll watch it again when I got some kids, when they get old enough. Maybe in college I'll sit down with them and, you know,

break out a Trader Brown. There you go. That's what Dad used to do. So, a big question that a lot of people have been asking, are you going to be in the movie? Oh, man. And I couldn't tell you if I was. Come on!

I was, like, Googling it before we came in here. They don't even have Bryan Cranston announced in the cast. And he's been tweeting about it and stuff like that, so it's almost like he's been saying he's in it. But the only cast announced is Aaron Paul and Skinny Pete. Yeah, Skinny Pete. Charles Baker. Yeah.

I mean, I'm so excited for it. I feel like you – can you answer whether you want to be in it? I can't even answer that. What can you answer, Dean? Fuck, man. I can say that there's going to be a movie. And they wouldn't say it for like six months, you know? It was like, oh, maybe, maybe there's a movie.

Whatever that thing is. How long did you know? Vince sent us an email to all the cast saying, hey, guys, we're going to do this movie. So just let you know. Do you have fear that it won't? I don't believe this is possible, but that like Idiots Online will be like, oh, that ruined the legacy. They should have left it. It was perfect.

I don't agree with that kind of stuff. I think that sequel is standalone. And should have left it. It was perfect. I don't agree with that kind of stuff. I think that sequel's standalone, and if something was perfect, that was perfect, and maybe this is great too. Maybe it's a little underwhelming. Whatever happens, I'm sure it'll be great. But is that like a concern at all? It's not for me. First of all, again, I have faith in Vince Gilligan.

And if you don't, you're a fool. Yeah. Seriously. And he's proved himself to know how to deal with all this stuff. So it's not an issue for me. And I agree. That show, the problem would have been if they tried to squeeze a few more seasons out of it. Yeah.

That was a perfect compromise. It was right there. Let it lie there. And that would have been an issue. But anything happens after, yeah. It stands alone or on its own. I mean, let's say it bombs, which it's not. Yeah.

So what? I said it's like Jordan on the Wizards. It's like no one – you still remember the Bulls and it's whatever. And plus you get guys like Vince Gilligan and Aaron Paul back in the mix. And fucking – he's going to be in it. And you get Dean Norris in the mix. Come on. You're going to be in it.

Uh-oh. I see some beer coming in. Let's have some Schrader Brow. Uh-oh. Look at this. I like the bars to a glass again. We're high society around here, okay? So, I mean, I'm a pretty lowbrow guy.

This looks pretty fancy to me. Do we got an over? Oh, yeah, there we go. Pop it open, man. Yeah, man. Let's do it here. You got photos. Fuck, I don't know how to do this shit, people.

I can switch it like that and go Oh, yes, sir. This right here, this is some bucket of shit for me. Trader Brow with Dean Norris, man. Now, you mentioned Comic-Con earlier. Yeah.

And you also mentioned earlier that you wanted the beer snobs to like this. Yeah. Who do you think is scarier, more intimidating? Like the Breaking Bad nerds who are really telling you how it works or beer guys who are going to be like, this is... We've already tested with beer guys, so I'm confident that we're good there. Cheers. Cheers, guys.

Thank you, sir. Absolutely. This is Raider Brow. It's a Breaking Bad. It's in a movie. Thank you, sir. Absolutely. This is Schrader Brow. It's a Breaking Bad. It's in a movie. Come on now. Give it a little chiller. Give it a little chiller.

Oh, no. I love this. It's good, though. Yeah. Oh, this actually is legitimately very good. Yeah. It's got like a nice little little component to it.

I celebrate myself and sing myself. Schrader Brow. Come back to life. That's from the poem that Yeah. Yep. That's awesome. Walt Whitman. That is great shit. It's a great signature right there, too.

A good signature. You got a good one, too. It's a great signature. I'll give you one, Dean. Now, let me just say something. This is the prototype label, and on the real label, there will be some little – there will be some little – what do you call them? Easter eggs.

Oh. I fucking love Easter eggs. I love Easter eggs. I'm a big Easter egg guy. And the Breaking Bad world has so many of them. That to me is where you can really get like the Comic-Con nerds and the freaks. I mean I would sit there and I'd read everything. What's the color?

What does purple mean? And what is this and that? It makes it so much better. It makes it like a whole cultural thing. Yeah, and sometimes I don't know that there were. I'd never figured I would make them up. I was going to remain silent there because I was like, I don't know what the purple is. It'll be crazy.

It's actually really fun. Like I said, I'm re-watching it now. I'm re-watching it with my girlfriend. I've never seen it. And it's awesome to be able to spot the Easter egg to pretend I'm a genius. I'm like, hey, do you realize all the color names? Jesse Pinkman, Walter White, Gray Matter. And he would, Vince would, here's how awesome he is, man.

Because I'd have to go in for a fucking wardrobe, right? I'm wearing a T-shirt or just a shirt. And there'd be like 10 variations of that color. I'm like, what the fuck? Down to that. And I have to put it on, take a picture, put it on, send it to him. And he would pick some variation of five grays. Really?

Or five oranges. You know what I'm saying? That's how, like, he was very involved in stuff with our beer. Really? Once I told him about it, he's like, oh, that sounds great. And he would, you know, he would, like, down to, like, giving us handwritten notes about things on the website and things on stuff. Like, literally, I'm like, all right, Vince Gilligan wants to, you know. I was going to say.

Edit my website. I'm all for it. Vince Gilligan. I would let Vince Gilligan make any decision for me my whole life. I trust that guy with anything over me. That's incredible, man. Yeah, so he's really into it, which is cool. Obviously, you want him to.

Darren Revell loved that. Get all the Pantones. Is that what they're called? Yeah. You can get deep with the colors and shit. Now, you're an Indiana guy, right? I am. Grew up and stopped in Indiana.

Colts fan? Yeah. I have proper response. I get it. I mean, they weren't there when I was in high school, so I didn't even grow up with them. All right. Right? But, and then when I was in L.A., there was never a team, but now there is.

So you don't need no more Rams? I kind of think I got to go Rams, because I want my kids to have a hometown. I have an older daughter who grew up in northern California, and so she's had to live in San Francisco being a Dodger fan and a Notre Dame fan. I was going to say, so Notre Dame is the team though, right? That's your heart and soul. That's the heart and soul team, yeah.

So to see them hopefully one day get back. I mean, 88 was the last national championship. Which also was the last World Series for the Dodgers, by the way. But, yeah, that's my team. So that's the one I really feel for. But the Rams, you know, I guess I can grow to love them. It's not bad right now. I mean, you're not jumping on a shitty bandwagon in any way.

Right. And I do a show in New Orleans called Claws. And, ooh, man, when that happened, when the – I'm rolling in with my L.A. hat. It's the only Dodger hat. I'm like, get that thing on. I bet. Give me a Saints hat.

Give me a Saints hat. Sounds good. Who dat? Who dat? Yeah! They were fierce. That was tough, man. That was tough.

I mean, rightfully so. And they changed the fucking – I'm sorry. They changed the fucking rules. That's amazing. It's never good when your team is the cause for a change. That was tough. That was tough. And they changed the fucking rule for them. That's amazing. It's never good when your team is the cause for a change. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because that means you're the last one to suffer from it.

If I was a Saints fan, I would never stop talking about that. Every fucking conversation I had. They won't. They shouldn't. Yeah. They had parades. I'm sure you guys all saw. They had parades down there during the Super Bowl.

I'm a Patriots fan, so it's pretty good to be me. But we have a nice... It's like being a Yankee fan. I know I'm in New York, but fuck you. Even worse. He claims that it's hard for him because they make it to the Super Bowl and don't win sometimes. I'm a Jets fan, so I'm the opposite. He's like, you're just miserable all the time.

I make it to the top and I fall. Fuck you, man. Just fuck off. I think it's a sound argument I fall. Fuck you, man. Just fuck off. I think it's a sound argument. It's a very sound argument. Fuck you. I'm Sisyphus, and occasionally we get to the top and occasionally we fall. Occasionally.

They're normally seven. Yeah. The reason I don't like him the most is because Tom Brady is so damn fucking good looking. I know. He's got it all. Leave some for the rest of us. Yeah. He's good looking.

He's got the money. He's a super athlete. He's 84 years old athlete He's you know 84 years old He's been playing still And he eats like fucking You know what does he eat Like some kind of crazy diet

Yeah BP12 diet He doesn't do He doesn't eat a fucking pizza man He doesn't do nothing One time Drink a beer And show the fucker

Yeah Stop winning Super Bowls And show some interceptions Motherfucker I do gotta mention Under the Dome Oh Under the Dome. Oh! Under the Dome.

Which I was so hooked early on. I love the concept. And then just recently on the podcast, we came up with the concept of doming. Doming. Which is if there's a wildfire or some sort of natural disaster, drop a fucking dome on it. Love it, man. Right? I mean, would it not work?

You're very well versed in the dome world. You're a professional domer. Maybe you could lead the charge here. Yeah, they should, man. That was a crazy show. It was a cool concept. It was. It was Stephen King.

Steven Spielberg produced it. Yeah. It was literally, I got done with Breaking Bad, and it was literally the next week I started doing that show. And they're like, oh, it's a Stephen King, Stephen Spielberg. I'm like, oh, man. Yeah, right? Like, do you want to read the script?

I'm like, no, I'm kidding. Do you care what your part is? Nope. Yeah, I mean, going from Gilligan to the Stephens is not too chubby, man. Yeah, the Stephens squared, man. What is that like, though, transitioning from arguably the greatest show of all time? In some way, you know you have to take a step down, even if you're on a great project, right? Yeah, you know you have to take a step down even if you're on a great project, right? Yeah, you do.

You can't be the guy that's waiting the rest of your life for that thing, though. You know what I'm saying? That's why I got right back into work. Oh, for sure. Because I've been around a long time. And I know guys who, like back in the indie film days, were like, I'm just doing indie films, man. And I look them up now. I'm like, that guy was great.

And he's doing guest Bob 3. It's like, man, just doing indie films, man. And I look them up now, and I'm like, that guy was great. And he's doing guest Bob 3. It's like, man, you've got to work. And you get something like that, you take it to the next project. That's just the way it goes. You mentioned Game of Thrones. Did you watch? I did. What are your shows?

Yeah, I watched Game of Thrones. Were you happy with the ending? No. Was anybody? Yeah, I don't think anybody was. Yeah, and I get it, you know. And that's the difference between a guy who sits around

for 20 years and writes a book and then it gets past it and you got TV writers going, oh, fuck, we gotta get this thing. You know what I'm saying? That's just the way

it's gonna go. Was there maybe like a little sense of satisfaction when the world is mad and you guys just kind of like clink your glass like, yeah, still the greatest. You're the only ones ever doing it. Yeah, you guys just kind of clink your glass.

Still the greatest. You guys are like the Miami Dolphins. 72 Dolphins. Every time they lose. I tweeted out, long live Breaking Bad. It really is. It's the greatest show of all time. Your character is incredible. The beer is incredible. You're an incredible guy.

I appreciate you coming through, man. Is this in stores? It's good. You're an incredible guy. I appreciate you coming through, man. So is this in stores? It's going to be all over? Right now, today it starts at CraftShack.com. So you can get it at CraftShack, like craft beer. Shack as in love shack. CraftShack.com. And they're pre-selling it right now.

And then it'll be in Albuquerque Costco. No way. Smart. I mean, I'm not too much of a beer guy, but this I do like. I really genuinely like it. It's got a good, solid, complex taste, but it's not like, puts you off.

Some of those fucking beers put you on your ass. Yeah. The IPAs, I was saying before we came in here, I could picture Hank being like, I don't know if you're going to be a beer snob. It's not a beer Marie, it's an IPA. It's like they're too bitter for me.

This is perfect. And you guys have plans for a lot more too, right? I think I read about some, what was it? We're going to do, yeah, we'll do like a winter ale. The winter ale. A summer thing. We might do a cerveza I couldn't think of the word for some reason

Do various other things As we go along We want people to like it first And if they do He's getting hammered right now He's just looking at it I hope you brought more than one bottle That's literally the last bottle

Of our test brew right there. I'm honored to have it. It's going to go right up on the wall here. There you go. Our wall of fame. Right there. Next to the White Walker, Johnny Walker. In front of the White Walkers.

Fuck Game of Thrones. Fuck you, George R.R. Martin. Write your book. Long live Vince Gilligan, man. That's right, man. Get back to work. Thank you, man. I really appreciate it. Thank you. All right. R. Martin. Write your book. Long live Vince Gilligan, man. Yeah, that's right, man. Get back to work. Thank you, man. I really appreciate it.

Thank you. All right, good, good. Turn around. Look at what you see. In her face. The mirror of your dream. Make believe I'm everywhere Give it in the light

Written on the pages is The answer to a never-ending story Reach the stars Fly a fantasy Dream a dream And what you see will be Fly the kingdom Fingertip

I'm pulled behind my clouds And there upon a rainbow Is the answer to a never ending story Story heart