KFC Radio - Quickie: Blake Anderson

Episode Date: May 4, 2018

Blake Anderson, KFC and Feits have a couple Dos Equis and chat about what they want to be when they grow up, video games and chopping penisYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Wow. All right, we are live here at the bar with our guy, Blake Anderson. What's up, man? Uncle Blazer. We are sipping on our Cinco Equis, which is the most hardcore beer I've ever had in my life. Right? It's really delicious. It's like Dos Equis, but with three more Equis's.

Yeah, and I'm telling you, those three more Equis really do wonders. It makes a difference. It's like Dos Equis, but with three more equises. Yeah, and I'm telling you, those three more equis really do wonders. It makes a difference. It does. It does. So we got Cinco de Mayo around the corner. We're enjoying our beers. Your best Cinco de Mayo story. You got one for me?

You a tequila guy? I do like tequila. I'm all about, like, what are those when you get the margarita with the beer in it? I think they call them, like, Caroni? No, no, no. No, you can, it's actually way better with those Secchis. Those are just Cinco X's.

I think they call them, like, Bulldogs or something. Maybe they only call them that in Arizona. I don't know. But either way, most Cinco de Mayo's have those involved. Did you have something happen in Arizona, bro? We were just recently there for the Game Over Man press tour

and Arizona knows how to party. Yeah. The rumors are true. That's where Gronk learned all his tricks. Arizona State, Talking Stick. We were at Talking Stick. That place goes. Yeah.

You want to be there? It's like a casino type of layout. Arizona goes hard. They know what they're doing. Google it, man. Dark web it if you want the real story. What is your drink of choice? Absolutely Cinco Equis.

You're a beer guy. I am a beer guy, and I'm really hoping that by doing these little Funny or Die sketch commercial things that I have a lifelong pass in deliveries every week of just Equis at my door. Yo, that's the dream right there. You can pay me in beer. I'm so stoked that I've finally gone pro beer drinker. If you could have told me that when I was like 16. Imagine that. I'm good.

Yeah, you know how, like, skateboarders, you're always trying to get your sponsor? I finally got mine. Like, my dad. You know what? I'm, like, really happy for you. My dad is so proud. Congratulations, man. Thanks, man. Like, that's the American dream. Yeah. Retirement money and this and that. No, no, no. Just keep the beer coming.

As a 15-year-old, you said you wanted to be a pro athlete. Yeah. You hit, like, college, 18. You're like, this is what I want to do forever. As a child, I wanted to. I thought I was never going to grow up. I thought I was going to live in a treehouse in my backyard with all my toys. Eventually, I grew out of that one. This is one I never grew out of.

So you, like, you achieved your lifelong dream, the one that you really stuck with for a while. Screw Nike. I went Dos Equis. Sneakers are good and all, but it doesn't get a buzz on. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a gas man. Because I saw the dude had just pulled out a lot of cash to give you change. And I was like, these guys are paid. I just want to pump gas for a living.

Yeah, well, they were probably also dealing drugs on the side. That was a drug dealer. A gas man. He's like, I got that gas, man. What else do you need? Fill it up with what? man He's like I got that gas man What else you need Filled up with what Premium Okay I got you

Yeah you want that premium That's like when you go to Like Taco Bell And you ask for like Extra lettuce It's a cool Taco Bell Is that the code I was gonna say

I've heard like You see that with McDonald's all the time McDonald's puts like Coke in your patty I'm telling you It's a good racket you got running there. I feel like, yo, this number two has got me going today.

I don't know why. So, life post-Workaholics. Mm-hmm. I feel like, in a lot of ways, it's ramped up. Like, I feel like you guys are all doing a lot of different projects, but has it also, like, kind of chilled a little bit? You relax? Or is it just, like, pedal to the metal?

I finally got to step back and reflect on the days. No, it was really crazy. Like, Workaholics was surprisingly a lot of work. Like, we were super heavily involved in the whole process. Did you guys really live in that house? That was a room right here. Is that true? We did, yeah.

Season one, we lived in the house while we were filming there. But just the lines of reality started started to blur so much are we on the cameras rolling or not yeah right and like you know when you when you like are done for the day you're not fully wrapped out and because people still got to like pull all like the the cords and then like it'd be like the the old script coordinator lady would still be in my room way late in the night and i'm like you're still gone i think she was recording me sleep so we had to move out selling that on the dark web yeah like anderson snoring look it up it's out there the footage is there man yeah um so you guys were just like chilling on the roof like that or was that scripted no that was a real thing yeah we kind of really

are just like dumb stoners smart enough to get a show but yeah no it's okay to be a little dumb yeah oh we're a lot of plays i'm dumb we've been having this conversation all week how like we've come to the realization we're not really talented yeah we just kind of like do this yeah this doesn't really take talent like you guys are writing producing acting talented i'm not hey man don't don't sell yourself short there's some ideas in We just kind of like do this. This doesn't really take talent. You guys are writing, producing, acting. You're talented. I'm not. Hey, man, don't sell yourself short. There's some ideas in that.

Not really. You just need to drink more Cinco Equis, and then you'll – this is real idea sauce. The problem is I was having Dos Equis for so long, and I wasn't getting enough Equis, and now my brain is stimulated, and my ideas are growing. It's opened your third eye. Speaking of that, the idea behind the eggplant emoji flick that's coming out on Netflix. I think the third eye is a woke thing, not your dick hole. Yeah, no.

Actually, that's debatable now that you mention it. Which one is your third eye? We have like five eyes on us now that I think about it. Well, that's like some woke shit right there. Let me tell you uh yeah no it's just this movie we kind of like uh got this script sent to us for this crazy movie about you guessed it a penis getting chopped off it's part of it's coming it's part of our waiting for it uh we kind of have this running thing now that we're like doing a uh like penis getting cut off trilogy and this is the

the final chapter okay because we started one in workaholics where like carl wants to give me his penis that was the first chapter and then two was in game over man and now we're closing the guys just love chopping dicks off huh i mean it's it's just such, but right on the nose, you know? Right on the head. Yeah, right on the head. I mean, I read that Netflix was in a bidding war for it. It was like people clamoring for this castration movie. I'm telling you, man.

You guys know the market. You know what the people want. Yeah, they want to see. It's a memorable thing. It's a thing that will stick with you. If you're going to sell something, like we were talking wrestling before the show here. The most famous

wrestling scene I've ever seen in my life. Still have flashbacks. Val Venis getting chopped up. He said, I choppy choppy your pee pee. Dude, that was a moment, man. How about growing up with Lorraine and Bobbitt? Remember that? Yeah, dude. That was like, I was a young kid put the fear of fucking God in me on that one. That might be why we keep returning to this.

We grew up in an era of what do you call it? Stick chopping. Yeah, I want to say decapitation, but castration. Castration. There you go. We're products of the castration era. You're also talking Nintendo before. Yes.

I mean, I feel like things like wrestling, Nintendo, like that kind of stuff. I really do feel like molded kind of people we are. Oh, for sure. Yeah, I know. And now people are getting molded by John Cena and Fortnite, which we're still in good hands. Have you like, I'm like old school. I don't like change. I'm like Fortnite.

I'd rather play like Mega Man 2. Have you evolved? Are you like in with the new stuff? I've told myself that my retirement plan is to dive way deep into video games. Oh, video games. I was going to say, drugs is the way to go.

You can do both. That is a retirement right there. But I'm definitely going to hop back into gaming a ton once I... The problem is though, by the time you're retired, the game's going to pass you by. You're going to be like,

here, hop on this helmet in this fucking virtual reality. You're going to be like, where's the controller, man? But they're going to, in the future, those little kinks are going to be worked out. You're going to be able to hop right into it, and it's going to be like Ready Player One. Here we go. Let's go. Yo, that movie, see that?

Yeah, it was wild. That was the best movie I've ever seen, but I'm a nerd. I'm a nerd. You saw Ready Player One. Here we go. Let's go. Yo, that movie? See that? Yeah, it was wild. That was like the best movie I've ever seen. But I'm a nerd. You saw Ready Player One? I went solo. You went solo movie. I went solo, man. I love going to movies by myself.

I go probably two or three times a week I go by myself. We got a question the other day. Would you rather be able to drink whenever you want, but you have to drink by yourself, or you can only drink once a week, but you can do it with people and socialize. I guess I would do the social drinking. Oh, I thought you were going to say solo.

I'm a solo guy. I got to have my Cinco Equis every day. I can't have it once a week. I guess that's just like the lifestyle that I'm currently living. So I look wistfully at the party. But yeah, no, it's me and Eckie's. That's it. We're like Fox and the Hound, if you will.

Buzz Lightyear and Woody. Fox and the Hound was maybe the saddest movie of all time, man. They tried to murder each other and stuff. Dude, you learned. You did learn. I tried. I learned a lot. They weren't afraid to show you death. That's the thing. Nowadays, these kids, man, they didn't see a Fox and a Hound try to murder each other on a cartoon. They didn't start off Bambi with Bambi's the thing. Nowadays, these kids, man, they didn't see a fox and a hound try to murder each other on a cartoon. They didn't start

off Bambi with Bambi's mom dying. Right. Just right away. Boom. If you thought you were going to be happy, you're wrong. Okay, now roll the opening credits. Well, now they're going to start by watching the kids' dick get cut off and welcome. That's how we're going to do it. You know what? You're still molding the youth. Thank you. I appreciate that.

Yes, absolutely. You're doing good things. Thank you, man. Thank you. I don't hear it enough from my parents you got a little girl too huh i do i do i do i i just saw that the uh the like the picture you guys put out when she was first born yeah you like naked and like doggy style in the background yeah interesting birth announcement also on the dark web. I see you definitely. Yeah, no. That'll be a fun one for her when she's like 14.

You know, I don't think that far ahead. Me neither. I get a little girl, and they'll be like, what are you going to do when she's like 15? I'm like, 15 years old?

Yeah, that's the one thing about parenting is you do have to look into the future, and that's never really been my style. I'm kind of a day-by-day guy. Minute by minute.

Yeah, but it's a fun adventure, I will say that. As is sipping on Cinco Equis. So we appreciate the time, man. Keep in touch. Always good to see you guys. Thank you, brother. Cheers.