KFC Radio - Tommy Pham Watch Has Begun ft Camille Kostek

Episode Date: July 20, 2021

Subscribe, Rate, Share, and Leave a Review! Subscribe to our youtube: barstool.link/KFCRADIO -KFC and Feits Recap our first KFC Radio Live Show back. Thanks to everyone who came out! Keep an eye out for our next one. -We do our third every KFC Radio Callback to the guy who created Tommy Pham watch -We give Big Daddy Trent a call to understand why he was so confused about seeing Sweet n Sour sauce the other night -Top 5 SNL Case Members -We listen to a recording of a cold caller's first day at work that goes terribly wrong -Voicemails include obliterating geese & adopting chickens -(01:53:00) Camille Kostek returns to the show! We discuss her long-term (fake) engagement with Feits, funny moments while modeling for Sports Illustrated, her role in the upcoming Ryan Reynolds movie Free Guy, and much more! Let us know what you think on twitter: @KFCRadio @KFCBarstool @Feitsbarstool @JNics415 @nickhammy5 @Joshua__DM @mikeypavssYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Hey, KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. We're on the same page. We're agreeing. We're escalating and yelling each other louder despite agreeing with each other. That's the show. It's another edition of KFC Radio on the Barstool Sports Network. It's Clancy and Feidelberg. We're back! Fresh off our

live show. Shout out to everyone who came out to Levity out in. Hey. We're back. Fresh off our live show. Shout out to everyone who came out to Levity out in Rocklands. We hit the burbs for our first live show back from COVID. If you were there, shout out to you. Got a couple hundred people in a mall. In a mall? It was a weird thing, man. That's one of those, like, so Levity Comedy Club is in the mall,

in the Palisades Mall, which is like the 10th biggest mall in the country or some shit. Which Kevin didn't know malls were big. Bro, it's the biggest mall in the mall, in the Palisades Mall, which is like the 10th biggest mall in the country or some shit. Which Kevin didn't know malls were big. Bro, it's the biggest mall in the country. It's a huge one. It's bigger than any mall you've ever been in. It's bigger than any mall you've ever been in. On the way in, which, oh yeah, by the way,

Kevin's the worst driver in history. What's amazing. I am, I am, you, just because you're scared doesn't mean I'm bad at it. You slam the brakes a lot. Because I'm multitasking. Yeah, that's bad driving. No, it's not.

It's good driving. Oh, you're incorrect. I'm never going to get in an accident. Never been in an accident. I can't wait until you die in a car accident. If that happens, you can call me a bad driver. Until then, save your fucking pearl clutching for your fucking mom's car. I'm promoting the show.

You had no idea I thought you were bad driving. I absolutely did. Bullshit! When I first, the first time I had to like brake because I was fucking Yeah, you went up. And it was like 25 feet between us and the next car. It was about a foot between us and a dog. There was

never any, that was crazy too. I was just turning left. I was just turning left. I was just turning left. And if you've ever turned left in New York City, when the pedestrians are coming, you've got to slowly creep in. Otherwise, you're never going to turn left. But there wasn't a slow creeping. There was a slow creeping. It was a jam session.

According to me, it's a slow creep. Just because you creep extra slow doesn't mean my slow creep isn't slow. You sound like my fucking mom. And now you know what's gonna happen next time you're in the car with me now I'm really gonna drive like an asshole oh yeah guess what never again

yeah good good good and how much quicker did I get you there uh these guys left like half an hour before I will say this and they got there 20 minutes after

significantly yeah I love that when I was like Nick how'd you get there he's like I'm not there yet I was like, Nick, how'd you get there? He's like, I'm not there yet. I was like, we left 20 minutes after you. It was amazing.

Made great time because of my driving. Fuck you. The timing was good. The driving was subpar. Jackie's in the back crying her eyes out because she's fucking like reading or looking at the screen or whatever. Jackie's like, I'm going to puke. That's also because you guys don't know how to, when you drive in Manhattan and especially right now post-COVID,

it's a fucking post-apocalyptic war out there, man. The amount of, you gotta like, there are times I'm like blowing past cops being like, I don't care what you're saying, fuck you, I gotta turn left. Because if I don't, it's another hour and a half on my trip. You got motherfuckers who are, they have no idea what they're doing out here in the streets.

Okay, but the issue with your driving, other than the fact that you don't even use your hands, you drive with your knees, but you also, when you switch, like, the issue is the jerkiness of your driving. In the city, you have to do that. It's very herky-jerky, you're correct. You could so easily just, like, slightly, like, hurt lane. No, you cannot. No, you cannot. You go, you go, like, horizontal, and then you pull your back in if you i want you to drive in the city and tell me that you can just slowly glide in and out by the way this is you can't

this is a woman who's hit an 80 year old man and she's telling you she's telling you by the way the last driving story from jackie was i hit a pedestrian take your fucking california west coast driving bullshit and shove it up your ass. It was a hard tap. I believe she said he was dramatic about the whole thing. He was. Again, hit is an aggressive word. Hard tap.

If you make contact with a pedestrian and you are in the car, that's the problem. The definition of hitting is hard tap. If I hit the dog, if I hit that Great Dane, first of all, we would have been fucked. That Great Dane would have broke my windshield. If I hit the dog,

if I hit the dog, I would have been like, hand up, I hit a dog. I'm a bad driver. I didn't hit the dog. You hit a grandpa! The old man didn't fall, like he didn't fall. Well, because he's a fucking warrior, apparently. Because his balance is still

up from Omaha Beach when he invaded. No, my car hit, like, made contact with him, yes. Oh, now it's the car's fault. Officer, I wasn't speeding, the car was speeding. I didn't hit him. The car hit him. But the, I do say,

you did pull a move that I will describe as nothing less than legendary. It's when, so we all text and drive. It happens occasionally. But usually, once you kind of have a situation, you're like, all right. Put the phone down. Let's fucking zone in here. Kevin had to slam the brakes. It was not his fault, by the way.

He cut across like three lanes of traffic to get in front. Yeah, I remember that. Well, no, you didn't because you didn't see it. I did, but I got you. No, you saw the car. You didn't see where it came from. Oh, right, right, right. You did not know how many lanes he came from.

Right, right, right. I got you. I got you. And so Kevin had to slam the brakes on. And usually you put your phone down in that case. Kevin didn't even brake stride in a text. Dude, it's not even texting anymore. I mean, I've edited videos driving.

Like, I will sit there and I'm chopping up one Miniman video to send to my brother. I mean, it is – I don't even consider not multitasking behind the wheel anymore. I mean, just like also just dumb things. Like that the other day, like I needed to get out of the house. I needed to get here. I think it was that day i was like i'm on a tight schedule and i was like the videos were too long so i was like i have to do this there are times where i'm just like checking out the timeline just like wow this is getting boring i i give driving theater rules which is

which i know you don't abide by either which is if you text me i'm gonna reply to a quick text but i'm not gonna fuck around on my phone. Yeah, I mean, I I'm just on the phone constantly. It's a full-blown addiction. It's like when you're in the car if you're addicted to cigarettes, you smoking them? Yep. If you've got an addiction, doesn't matter where you are,

you're fucking scratching that itch, man. Put it on the board, it is, I refuse to ever die in a tornado and Kevin, we have to have a party when Kevin dies in a car accident. Yes. Yes. I will die behind the wheel. No doubt.

And when that happens, you can call me a bad driver. Until then, you can call me an aggressive driver. Sure. You can call me, I was going to say reckless. I don't really give you reckless. I'm going to give you reckless. But I don't, I've never been in an you until you what you're doing in the car is reckless so you're being a reckless driver now you have now you have not uh reaped the rewards of that

just yet i think that until it's reckless it's like um i guess you're right i'm trying to think like i guess the reckless is not defined by the results, right? Right. But until then, you know what it is? It's like, until then, it's like when people say like, oh, you know, one day you're going to get what's coming to you. And if you don't get what's coming to you, you fucking, you know. I'm getting places faster for the rest of my life until I get in a car accident. I was talking to a throat doctor and he was like, yeah, you show like no signs of chewing tobacco. But it's going to kill you. But no signs right chewing tobacco but but it's gonna kill you but you will die you know what it is too it's so open so weird i'm seeing you

tomorrow by the way so um but you're going back to the doctor yeah for for your mystery illness yeah just a follow-up that's a good idea figure it out i think i think everyone i've talked to has been very concerned that they were like i don't know hope it doesn't happen again it's like what is this like the 1800s like i don't know hope you don't die some doctors do it take a stab mail time um i am a worse driver that i am a bad driver when i have to drive properly that i like i i have to drive the way i drive this this sounds like someone who like a high school kid who's like i drive better drunk yeah because i focus yeah we know when i have to do like 10 and 2 and like drive the speed limit i like it feels weird to me i like i almost i feel like i'm driving too slow and that's like the problem if they're

if i have open road in front of me i take it yeah when you're cautious that's when you get hurt kind of that's what letty ortiz says it's like you know when yeah when you're if you're when you brace when you brace up you fucking I don't know who Lenny Ortiz fast time you don't know who Lenny is come on but yeah

when you brace up you break all your bones when you're loosey goosey when you're good that's me just good to go in and out and honestly

I mean I cannot tell you how fucking bad the traffic is it's a war out there it was bad that was my first time experiencing it I mean I cannot tell you how fucking bad the traffic is it's a war out there it was bad that was my first time experiencing it

I mean we it was like probably took us let's say 50 minutes to get there and 30 minutes it was just getting like to the fucking

West Side Highway I think it was 150 I think it was an hour and a half yeah was it I mean whatever it was but like the first like 30 minutes was just like moving like three blocks

in the city and that's where Jackie was and cops saying no you can't turn here. Just go in. Fucking get out of here. Jackie, can you do me a favor? Can you get me a glass of ice, please?

I'm just going to have a drink. I get a weekend cold, and all day I've been saying, just get through the head re-interview. A weekend cold. Is that what we're calling now? A weekend cold. That's what Josh's friend just recently texted him. Should we be bailing on you?

Yeah. A weekend cold. Which I'm like, I'm using that. That's awesome. I was going to say, I almost respect that. I was supposed to go on a date tonight, and she was like, hey, I haven't really recovered from this weekend cold. And I tweeted, I was like, the fuck's a weekend cold?

Is that a nice New York way to say you went to Common Ground and just did too many drugs? That girl had a fat hangover and did too many drugs. I almost have to respect that. I'd rather that than an actual... She softened it, but she didn't lie. She rebranded. Yeah, that was rebranding. That was just good branding. If she said, I got to go to my mom's house, that like rebranded. Yeah. That was rebranded. That was just good branding.

If she said like, oh, I got to like go to like my mom's house and like, that's just a lie. If she was like, I did too much cocaine this weekend. Like, all right, girl, see you next weekend. Maybe. I don't know. Maybe I'll get you on a Thursday before you go on your coke binge. Who knows? Yeah, right.

Like, I would love to have a hangover, a weekend cold with you. We could have our hangover cold together, girl. This could be the beginning of something beautiful. We got Camille Kostic on the show today talking Sports Illustrated and modeling and whatnot. John's fiance. We talk a lot about nipples. Put that on your fucking clickbait. Camille Kostic talks about nipples on KFC radio.

Let's go. Also, this week, we will have an interview coming up with Henry Gold that we did today. Henry Golding. And we'll talk more about it at length, but I just can't not talk about it. He grabbed our dicks. Like the hottest guy in the world grabbed our dicks. He got both of your balls, right? He got my two nuts and my dick. He's got a bear paw.

He's got a huge hand. Huge hands. He only got one. He got a full dick and one nut. He's got a bear paw. He's got a huge hand. Huge hands. He only got one. He got a full dick and one nut. I love this. Just because I got one that's longer. Had he scooped under, he would have got it all, but he didn't go too low. He's got the ones at regular height.

So that is on the show this week. We got more to talk about with him, i don't want to ruin uh that but the live show um like i said a couple hundred people um came out and zero from new york city which i love makes sense after we spent how long it takes to get out there i i was under the impression that that night this show was 20 minutes away oh i i tweeted it's only 40 minutes away a lot of times well technically it is there's no traffic it's like Rocket saying it takes by the way shout out Rocket call him Poppy when he says it takes 15 minutes

I believe 7 minutes I forget what time it is he says but to get from Saugus to Fenway and then Coley was like I'm never again letting him say that to me because it's been 45 minutes now. I'm good, thanks. And –

Yeah, it's like seven minutes if you fly. Like a bird. Rocket waited until three in the morning to do – And he got you. Yeah. And he's like, look. And I was like, I love it. Oh, wait.

That's amazing. He also said something like – he's like, oh, I didn't realize you were going to do it during rush hour traffic. It's like – That's when the games are, dude. Oh, you wanted to go for a Sox game? Yeah, that's going to take you longer. I mean, if I was a KFC Radio fan and I lived in Manhattan and I got bamboozled into going to this, like I was pitching, come on out from the city, it'll be a good time.

And I mean, I would take one look at the traffic and be like, oh my god. Yeah, yeah. Eat the cost of those tickets, whatever was all rockland people all people from the burbs which is cool levity is a cool club because i think my guess would be that it started out as like comics go through there when they want to work out some new material when they are trying out new bits when they you know they don't they're not ready whatever but then so many people did that that it just became like its own fucking spot because louis ck was there the week before and the the hallways was like chris rod and gary simon and it's just crazy to me that it's in a mall it's like like because

there's no unless i'm wrong maybe there is but like there's no back way to get in right like if like like if like a star shows up he he's walking by fucking Dave and Buster's and right by JCPenney's right through the front door, no? There must be somewhere, right? What does it tell us? Yeah, those fucking assholes walk right in. You know there's a hockey rink in that mall?

Oh, so now the mall's big, huh? Now the mall's big! That's what the whole thing was about! That's what the whole thing was about. That's what the whole thing was about. Now it's impressive. Kevin was surprised. I used to go to the movies at malls. Yeah.

You grew up on malls at movie theaters? I was like, yeah, that's every mall ever. It's not, though. The hockey rinks are new. Go-kart things, those are new. Those are big malls. It's a big mall. But a theater in a mall is not a big mall.

It doesn't make it a big mall. It just makes it a mall. That's not true.s. It's a big mall. But a theater in a mall is not a big mall. It doesn't make it a big mall. It just makes it a mall. That's not true. True. That's very normal. I go to so many malls that don't have a movie theater. If you don't go to the right ones, then... I mean, all of the malls in New York except for the Palisades don't have a fucking movie theater. I'm saying it's a suburb.

Most malls are in the suburbs. These are in the suburbs! These are in the suburbs of New York! No, I don't think so. I don't think so. I would venture to guess that 95% of malls have movie theaters. Of actual malls.

Not around here. And not like a fucking multiplex like yours. Like when I went to the King of Prussia mall in Pennsylvania, yeah, sure, that was the biggest mall in the country. This one's like top 10. Those are gonna have it. Those are going to have it. Those are going to have fucking... What are those called?

Ferris wheels. Escalators. Ferris wheels. Ferris wheels? Yeah. Ferris wheels? Yeah. That has a Ferris wheel.

King of Russia does? No, the one we were just winning. It's too big. I didn't see it at all, but... It's a big mall! I never said the mall was small. I said theaters aren't crazy. I said theaters aren't crazy. I said theaters don't make it a big mall.

A hockey rink makes it a big mall. It's a huge mall. It's a big mall. We're on the same page. We're agreeing. We're escalating and yelling at each other louder despite agreeing with each other. That's the show. That's how KMC Radio works.

You asshole. Pour yourself some New Amsterdam vodka, John. Take that edge off. It's been a long day. We've been at work for like seven hours this work week, and it's too much. Too much to handle. I had to get up at a regular time this morning. It was bullshit.

I woke up at 6 a.m., and I puked. Yeah, we'll talk about it. But what I need when I'm struggling to get through the work week, it's a little New Amsterdam vodka. When I want to have a nice after work cocktail, it's New Amsterdam vodka. But I'm watching a game. Whatever I'm doing, it's New Amsterdam vodka. Anytime you want to have a vodka drink, which is my drink of choice,

my liquor of choice, it's a little Navi. It's smooth and quality while still being affordable. It's the official vodka of Barstool. It's the official vodka of Chicklets. It's the official vodka of NHL. It's five times distilled, unparalleled smoothness, crisp, clean. New Amsterdam vodka, the official vodka of Barstool Sports. Thank you, sir.

Let's hear what this puke says. You had a weekend cold i i i had yes the equivalent of that of parenting instead of like a partying cocaine binge i had children all weekend long it was keegan's birthday the big 04 uh i had him all weekend long and Oh, yeah, Keegan thinks I'm his dad now. Yes. John sent a happy birthday video, and I'm, like, in front of Keegan. I'm like, look at this. And he goes, is that daddy? I'm like, no, motherfucker.

I'm daddy. Right here. Still me. You dumbass. Is he saying we look alike? No, I think he, like, I don't know what he thought. His brain just short-circuited. Oh, so he's just an infant or something? Yeah, just a he like I don't know what he's on. His brain just short circuited. Oh, so he's just an infant or something? Just a fucking four year old?

Is that daddy? You idiot. I'm better looking than that. He's ugly. Look how fat his head is, you dumb shit. Have you seen your dad's skinny head? He's got a skinny head. But so the first day was so saturday we went to ride playland which is a

yeah you have it yeah we did uh the devour like food games the hockey we used to drink there oh yeah so but so uh but you didn't do like the amusement park no no so we like the music it's like a second rate third rate you know tiny amusement park and they have a kid's section and it was 95 and hot as fuck and i just a lot of asphalt though to cool down oh it's like the concrete jungle to the max they did have those nfl like misters there's one part where there's like mist shooting out oh i was like let's just hang here for a while kids that felt great um i mean i just don't do those things anymore like if it's that hot i'm like my kids were like i come up with indoor shit you know like i just don't do build a fort yeah like all that kind of shit so but it was a big birthday celebration so we go and i mean

all of us and kids i've learned just don't feel temperature hot or cold they just and i remember that as a kid like i would play like football and basketball till like my hands were frozen and it just didn't matter and at the beach and in the summer like you're dehydrating and about to like pass out and fun to go play like football and snowstorms right now it's like put on a t-shirt i never in a million years would and so i'm like literally feeling like ill i'm pouring water on my head i'm sweating i i mean just awful so i go we go do that for a while and uh and then and then i think like okay that was the big like thing for the weekend and then the next day that actually his actual birthday that was the day before so his actual birthday was sunday so stupid me thinking like his actual

birthday wasn't going to be as big of a deal, but we needed to do some fun shit there. So we go to the park and it's the same thing again. And so does he know it's his birthday? Very, very little. Like he doesn't quite get it yet. He's dopey. He's just like, whatever, dude, where are my presents? And I guess all weekend I was like kind of sunburned, very dehydrated, not eating right.

Like stuff in like amusement park water, amusement park food and shit in my mouth. That'll do it right. And then I, instead of consuming 3G responsibly, I over-served myself, I think. And so here is my scientific thought. This is my Jackie thought for the day. I think, because this has happened to me before. If I smoke too much weed or eat too many edibles, I throw up in the morning. And I think what happens.

How often does this happen to you? Probably half a dozen times. Because I am a high school child when it comes to weed and THC type products. And I get the munchies like a fucking like an idiot. It's so cliche but I can't help it. I can eat literally everything in sight. My brain

is telling me that I eat too much food and I get too high and it stops the digestive processes in my stomach because when I throw up the next morning, it is like I just ate it two seconds ago. It's like full mini muffins, full buffalo chicken, full cereal, whatever it is that I just had.

Together? Actually, no, I'm not joking. Yeah, maybe. But it comes out like it just went in. I'm like, my stomach has just been doing nothing for 12 hours. You just did it into a bowl. You could just eat it again if you wanted. Almost.

If there wasn't like other bodily fluids in there, I could just eat it straight back. And I think that. Oh, fuck. Is that a hot dog? Yes. If I somehow could have swallowed those things whole, they would have been right there for the taking. And so I woke up at 6, and I was like, oh, this sucks.

But I was like, I don't want to puke right now. So I laid back down, being like, I'm just going to lay in bed. I'm just going to, like, breathe deep, put on the air conditioner, like, cool off. And then I was like, oh, it's coming. So I just puked my brains out. Like, blood coming out. At 6 a.m. this morning? Yes. Yes. Boy, oh, it's coming. So I just puked my brains out. Like blood coming out. At 6 a.m. this morning?

Yes. Yes. Boy, oh, boy. And I went back to sleep until like 8. I didn't puke, but I was up at 6 a.m. That sucked. I can't believe people do that. It's crazy.

You were up at what? I was up at like 6 a.m. Like 5.30, I think. Did you go to bed early? No, because I was on shore. I had to be here for an 11 a.m. interview. So I took a ferry here. It was an 8 a.m. ferry. And I took a ferry here. It's an 8 a.m. ferry.

And that took a little bit of a drive. Well, that was silly of you. It was a Zoom interview. Yeah, I know. But I wanted to be here. I know. I mean, it is better to be here. It was a full day.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, getting up early. It's for the birds, man. It's not. It's one of the most. I don't understand why people just get a new job. Well, I will say, COVID has kind of stopped this and it might be going back.

Like everything else in the world is going back to normal. So I suspect that like work hours will do. Yeah. But during the pandemic, like, I mean, I used to get up. I used to when I was still with Caitlin, she would go to she would get to work. I used to get to the office working at Barstool Sports at like 730 in the morning. That is nuts. When we first moved here?

Yes, when we first had the first office. Because Caitlin would get up at like 5 to get ready and everything before the kids got up at like 6. And we would get on like a 654 train or something like that. Which we'd get to the city at like 7.30. So maybe I got to the office like a little

before 8. Because I was just like she needed to be to the city at like 7 30 so maybe i got to the office like a little before eight and because i was just like she needed to be like at her office by like 7 30 janitors here yeah and it was like and i guess i would go home early but i don't know i just remember i just remember like this is terrible and i don't and i don't need to do this but it was like then then like we'd have to take two trips to the train station and the nanny was getting the kid it was just yeah it was but it was one of those things that like i probably should have just been like no because i was like miserable going to work at like six in the morning just because like someone else had to go to work at six in the morning you know remember be like this is not my job this is your job why am i doing this so i remember it was just that's the type of shit no joke will kill you

that's what makes you miserable amongst other things you have a shitty boss you have a shitty like work that you have to do but the the hours and the timing in the morning will make you want to kill yourself when i was dating the girl who actually who dumped me uh with the bar and the crying the whole shebang i like i could tell that dumping was coming for a while because whenever i'd sleep over her house which was like basically every night because i lived with lewis and gas um she's just like she'd leave like she'd leave in the morning and she'd be like so you're just gonna like not it's not gonna work yet and I was like no we have we have different jobs you can go to the office I'm gonna fucking stay here until noon I just be like fat and shirtless in bed she's like I'm being productive Anything you want to do? I was like, I don't know. Can I have the remote?

Before you leave, can you bring the clicker over? Love you, babe. Just this fat asshole in her bed. See you at work for our healthy, thriving relationship. Can't wait to see you later, babe. Yeah, that'll do it. I just see you look and I'm like, she's going to dump me soon.

You know what that is, though? That's jealousy. You know what that is, though? That's jealousy. You didn't do anything wrong. You just keep different hours. And maybe it wasn't the most attractive thing in the moment. Not a great visual. That was the problem. If I was hotter?

If you were sexy in bed and were like, I don't have to go to work till 11, bitch. Had one fucking leg hanging out with like a six pack. Yeah, you could do whatever you want. Instead of just a translucent fucking meat man out here. That's what my legs look like. They're like big fat fucking meat mans. And then a couple of tits up here. It's a whole thing.

Yeah, you could have been getting up at six in the morning. She doesn't want to see any of it. All of it's gruesome. And getting up to fight crime. And just being like, oh, God. I don't think I want that fucking moose around me forever. Why are you bringing it up with me? Well, you remind me of a moose.

You're a moose. Yikes. I actually feel like if you wanted to dump me, what girls should do is, it's easy, by the way. I accept it pretty quickly. But like, remember when Hasselhoff's kid recorded him drunk? Yes. me what girls should do is it's easy by the way i accept it pretty quickly um but like everyone when hasselhoff's kid recorded him drunk yes to be like this is what it is right right just record me while i'm sleeping just that's a good idea this is why i'm leaving right and you would have to be like okay gross yeah i totally get it yeah i mean john's trying to leave himself

john if he could relieve himself on this planet yeah that anybody legitimately i i can't i cannot believe you must be an incredible lover when you're awake no it must be great otherwise because when you are asleep it's absolutely enough it could be true fucking love it could be absolutely perfect and i would be like it breaks my heart but we have to break up this isn't gonna work or i guess you just you would just have to be those couples who sleep in different rooms. Yeah. In like apartments. But you have to get to the house.

You've got to put you on like the roof. Because you'll hear me. I mean, your neighbors must hear you. Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. It's disgusting. Have you ever heard yourself? Oh, yeah.

Yeah? People have recorded it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you do know how that is. You know, I stole that idea. No, but there was a dumb thing. But it was was just like this is what you sound like at night can you believe that people have sex with that that somebody

blows you that's disgusting lots of people have blown me I know it's crazy many many dozens yeah dozens I know. It's crazy. Many, many. Dozens.

Yeah, dozens. Which was the highlight of our live show, by the way. You've got to come out to the show to see everything, but the one thing we did, we were like, we've got to tell this on the regular show. We got a voicemail. Actually, do you want to play the voicemail? Do you have it, or should I just recap it?

Just recap it. Voicemail of the show last week. This dude made a bet with his buddy. And can you look this up? Can you get me his latest? He's hitting 264 last night. I saw you do that. Tommy Pham of the San Diego Padres. If Tommy Pham bats 300 this season, this guy has to suck his friend's

dick. And he was batting, I think at that point, he was batting like 230 or something. And at the moment, he's batting... 271? No, wait, that's his career. So he's batting 260. No, that is his year.

Wait, is it? Yeah. So right now, he is batting 271. Yo, he's a career 273 hitter. You can't fucking bet a sucking a dick for the first time on a career 273 hitter having a pretty solid season. I mean, well, to bat 300, it would be – I mean, that's a big year. It's a big year, but it's not – But it's not – yeah, it's not outside the realm of possibility. 273 is – Yeah, all right. He i think at the time he was batting like 230 or something

he started off really slow and i want to say he's just been like you know 30 40 points later is now batting 271 and so i mean the tommy fam watch to me is the most electric thing in all sports. I cannot. Wait. I want to film this dude suck his friend's dick. Like, I want to be present for it. I said, if we can somehow, by the grace of God, go into game 162 batting 299.999 and all he needs is like a base knock and we electric chair these two guys. Or even better. They're if we i kind of want

it to be uh ted williams style he's above it we're choosing to lose it was four he was 400 the day of yeah and he had a double header double header and he went nuts i think about six or eight yeah yeah so i like if i want to see him get, like, it's 299. He gets, like, a base hit to put him at, like, 300. But he has, like, two or three more at bats. And you know that kid. Well, and then comes the funny part of the bet. Because I was going to say the dude on the 300 side of things would be like, take him out, take him out.

Defensive replacement. Or would you? Because you want to get your dick sucked by your friend. And the only thing we don't know, and we should, can we call these guys back? Yeah, I'm going to find it. I'm looking right now. Okay, if we can, let's call these guys back. Because what we do need to find out is if there's the other side of the bet.

Is it like you have to suck my dick if he bats under 300? Right, right. Because really then, you're not the winner. What if it was just the other kid's idea? It's just like his way. His friend's like, okay, dude. He's like, hey, Tommy Pham is doing this year. I'll suck your dick.

He's like, okay. All right. He's batting 230. Okay, dude, whatever. He's like, hey, Tommy's at 276 now. Right. Great, man. I mean, that's almost, yeah, that guy just wants to like just come out of the closet.

Yeah. This is his very elaborate way of saying I'm attracted to you on a date. Tommy Pham. Do we get a number? Give me a second. Okay. While Nick looks for that, if we're talking about coming out of the closet, Luke Prokop became the first NHL player to come out.

Yes. And I texted you. Yep. And I texted you. Yep. And I texted Ryan Whitney. Yeah. And I asked John and Ryan, can I say this? Because I have been,

they're trying to put me in a cage, John. The man's trying to hold me down. They put me in shackles after my Nigeria tweet. And I've been told that I can't make jokes of that nature anymore. So I'm trying to navigate this new world and I thought what I had was a very

funny tweet. It's just an accurate tweet. What did Whitney say? I said the same exact thing to both of you. I said, can I say this? And he said, no, I wouldn't. But it is true though. And you said it's hilarious and accurate but you'll probably get in trouble yeah yeah so i my tweet i had it written out i mean my my while driving i was driving into work today tweeting that out and i

said um listen all hockey players are a little bit gay luke pro cop is just fully it was and i mean i i spot the lie. I think if you add, because I gave you a little like a note where I said, if you said, but congrats to Luke for coming out fully there. Yeah, to add a little positive spin to it. Like a little positive in there. But it is like, yeah, I mean, all hockey players are gay. You guys are all so gay. And so what do you think, do you think that is a good locker room

or a bad locker room to come out in? In general, not his team. I mean, like in the sport. Do you think it makes it easier or more difficult that everyone's a little bit gay? I would guess easier. Yeah, I would think so, too. I was just wondering if it's kind of like, you know, if you are going to be like an asshole about it, would you be like, oh, well, now you want to suck my wrench? You know?

Yeah, you'll probably get some of that. I would think it's all through love and friendship and camaraderie. I would guess that hockey players, I think all, I think in professional sports, you're going to get assholes, bad people, deeply religious

people, people who are against it. Well, that's what I think the twist in hockey is. Not very religious. No one from the South. Right. Like, yeah, I'm sure there are some religious people, no doubt. it. That's what I think the twist in hockey is. Not very religious. Not from the South. I'm sure there are some religious people, no doubt. But it's not like baseball and football it seems like where most of the players are Southerners. Where they were raised in very religious communities. I mean, I don't know, but in

baseball, there's a lot of praying to God after a home run and a lot of post-game football. I just want to thank God. You just don't hear it in hockey. You're just not religious guys. You've got a lot of Canadians. You've got a lot of Russian guys, international. But you just don't hear about Jesus.

You don't hear about – No one thanks God for scoring a game-winning goal. No. Right. Thank Jesus for putting that puck on my stick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I did it. So that's obviously – I'm sure there's religious people,

but it's all stereotypical generalizing. But I think that it's probably like the best – I could see a bunch of guys just being like, whatever. Whatever, Lukey. Whatever, Prokey. Some fucking stupid nickname they have for him and they're just like, okay, cool, man. Whatever. Let's get back out there. I do think – and I think in football there's an element of it too where it's like you like you're putting your body on the line, your life is on the line, so nobody really cares. Yeah, I feel like it's almost like...

It's like we're brothers at war, basically. I was going to say similar to military. Yeah, whatever. I feel like people get worked up about that when there's a new female Marine or something like that, and they're like, could she... Could she pull her weight? It's like, you're a fucking fat dude. She's tougher than you, I promise you. Anyone who's actually serving with her is like,

no, we're good. I don't think you ever hear active people, active military members be like, can she fucking... It's always some fat slob like me being like, I don't think she can fucking do push-ups or whatever. It's like, what? So I think that it would be a good thing.

What team is he on? Nashville. He's not on Nashville. He's a Nashville prospect. He's not an active NHL player. That's ballsy to unfortunately, ballsy to like it's technically a risk. You know what I mean? Where you think this might fuck my chance off of making a club.

He also was, I think he was like a fifth round pick? Maybe a seventh round pick? He's not like I don't know how he's also was, I think he was like a fifth-round pick, maybe a seventh-round pick. He's not like a – I don't know how he's doing now, but he wasn't like a top pick. Right, right, right. So he might not make the league anyway. I don't know. But, yeah, I'm –

I would think it's going to be – it would be easy – the easiest sport to come out – this is going to sound like nonsense. The easiest and the hardest because i think everyone's gonna be very accepting but also i think everyone's gonna want to make jokes yeah well that's what they're already gay like we're already whipping our helicopter to our dicks around now we got to do it and be like well are we allowed to do this or like i don't know whatever like it it's like uh it almost it's like we want to just make like gay straight jokes. Now they're like gay, gay jokes. Is that okay?

Are we allowed, dude? I hope, I hope that he, it would be different if he already was on a team, but if he walked in and it was kind of like crickets and then he was just like, what's up boy? And it's like,

okay, we're good. We're still good. Um, but, uh, anyway, just,

just, just pretend that I sent that tweet, and it's really fucking funny. Good tweet, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Just tweet at me and be like, good tweet, bro. Good tweet. That'll make me feel like I got those retweets off. We got a number? We got a number.

Check, check. Can you hear us? Yes, I can. This is Alex. Alex, what's up, dude? Not much, man. Just tickling. How are you doing? We're good. So last Thursday night, we used your Tommy Pham voicemail for our live show. Oh, no way. Legendary.

Legendary. To say the least, man. We didn't know it was coming. Nick screened it and made like a little video to put up on on the big screen so we reacted the same way you know in real time the same way the audience did and i gotta tell you it's like my favorite voicemail ever we now are gonna put uh we're gonna put tommy fam watch out there and we're just going to like watch him like a hawk all season long to see if he can reach uh 300 so which give me a little bit background of like how this happened what the circumstances were and which side are you on you if you get your dick sucked if he bats 300 or you have to

do the dick sucking no so uh i will be getting my dick sucked. Okay. That's what makes it so incredible. Okay. So you guys are sitting around one day, and your buddy brings it up, or you bring it up? How does it all come about? So with diehard Padre fans, he's my best friend. He's also my roommate. We watch every single one of the games.

Dude, we made the trade for Tommy Pham, and he's been kind of frustrated for us as a San Diego Padre and i've always tried to be an optimist i'm like dude just wait just wait and then he's with tommy fans about like 219 220 and my buddy's just losing it he's like man fuck tommy fan this dude's absolute trash i'm like dude come on bro you got it and then my buddy just losing he goes dude i will suck your dick if he bats over 300. And me, as a guy, I mean, I'm a betting dude. And if someone's going to offer you a free blowjob, I mean, there's nothing that you have to do on the alternate side.

So that was my question. It's not like if he bats $299 this year, you've got to suck his dick. It's just like you either get a blowjob or not or nothing. Yeah, it's BJ or nothing, man. I can't wait. And so he's raised his average like 50 points in the meantime, right? Bro, literally the day we made the bet, I think he went like three for four. And ever since then, he's been on a tear.

He's batting over 270. He's hitting 271 currently. He's got some work. I mean, we're almost in August, and he's got to raise his average like 25 points. But if he's already raised it like 50 that means he's batting if you throw out the first chunk of the season where he's batting 219 he's probably batting like 330 right now to even make it come close so i think you and frank needed to do a bet like this for lindor oh my god i promise you this i don't care if it's the bet is the sun will come up tomorrow i'm not betting anything where i have to suck Frank Fleming's dick.

Okay? Because that is just – you just don't – I said a couple years ago if Pete Alonso goes for 50 and 120, I will come myself and jump off a bridge. He promptly broke the rookie home run record and did just that. I still have Mets fans yelling at me that I need to come myself and jump off a bridge or they're never going to win the World Series. So anytime you're making a bet involving coming or sucking you know you're rolling the dice but i guess so so first of all alex if there's a chance if somehow uh like game 162 he's batting like 299 or even if he's above 300 but it's right there we we want to do an electric chair with you guys we want because it would be unbelievable watching this guy if he's above 300 but it's right there we we want to do an electric chair with you guys we want because it would be unbelievable watching this guy because he's a Padres fan so maybe maybe

who knows maybe there's like a division on the line or you maybe you want to win but also at the same time you don't want Tommy family get a hit because then you gotta suck your friend's dick so there's a lot of different dramatic storylines to be had there so we want to uh we want to do an electric chair if that's possible. But also, here's the million-dollar question. Are you rooting for Tommy Pham to bat 300? 100%. So you want to get your dick sucked by your friend?

I have to. I have to have to let it happen, man. I have to. There's no other way around it. Bro, I completely agree with you like because you gotta teach him you can't welch on a bet you made a bet you lost you gotta suck a dick it's like the reverse of welching it's like well i gotta honor this bet yeah you're the you're the you're to the victor go to spoils but the spoils are kind of weird because it's gonna be your friend's mouth

like you say the spoils are your friend's mouth so do you think you would even get hard for your friend to suck your dick i don't know i think it's one of those situations where you just close your eyes and just put yourself into a different zone mouth to mouth dude my fucking my hope is actually that you kind of can't like you're drunk oh but this guy struggles what i want you got a blow job not not my dick in your mouth alex what's your friend's name If this guy struggles. But you make him go through it. What I want to see is. You better blow job. Not my dick in your mouth. Alex, what's your friend's name?

Carlos. I want Carlos to have a soft dick in his mouth. I want him to be trying to get you hard. Trying to get you to cum. Jackie's disgusted right now. Just fucking pulling it like it's gum. And I want Alex to be like, a little more, it's almost there I'll get there

I'll get there Oh my god almighty This is fucking Forget about Shohei Otani Forget about the rest of Slam Diego The storyline of the year right now Is Tommy Pham I will promise you this I will now is Tommy Pham. And I will promise

you this. I will make sure Tommy Pham knows about this. Oh yeah, we need to get Tommy Pham to the point that like come September, every at-bat, he's like, boy, Carlos is fucked. I am dialed in, dude. Or every time he pops up, he's like, fuck, I'm doing, you know, Alex is not going to get his dick sucked. Tommy Pham is going to find out about this and whether

or not he wants to admit it, it's going to be in the back of his head every at-bat. This is one of the better storylines ever. So, Alex, we will be keeping up Tommy Pham watch. This is some real-time, like, grow-the-game stuff. Yes. Yes. I want it to get to a point where, like, that fucking asshole Jeff Passan has to cover it.

And according to several outlets, Tommy Pham, I mean, the potential is through the roof. So keep us updated and let us know what Carlos is thinking. And we'll keep up on Tommy Pham watch. And come September, if there's a chance for some real dramatics, we'll have you guys do an electric chair, right? Oh, absolutely, man. Thanks for everything, guys. Go Padres. You got it, man.

Go Tommy. Thanks for everything, guys. Go Padres. You got it, man. Go Tommy. Thanks for everything. We ain't doing shit. You guys are just sucking each other's dick. Oh, my God. It's amazing. All right. Let's get into top fives today.

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Let me, real quick, just on the fly here. Quick phone call. Yeah, quick phone call. We'll see if he answers. Big Daddy's not the type to answer, but we'll see what Trent's got in store. He's probably like, fuck you. He really, the man just does not, if he doesn't want to talk or text, he just doesn't do it.

I know, he's a hero. It's amazing. Oh, what's up? Big Daddy, what's up, man? First of all, yes, the Henry Golding video is hilarious. I can't believe Instagram took it down because it's my balls. So how can you take down my balls? That's bullshit, man.

Secondly, we're on the podcast right now, and we got to talk about this sweet and sour sauce thing, man. I've never seen it. Let me see this here. What do you think about it? It's really good. It's delicious. Are you fucking kidding me? So it's good. It's delicious. Are you fucking kidding me?

So it's sweet and it's sour. That's good. I just never seen it. I think this is a bit. It's not a bit. I always get barbecue sauce in my chicken nuggets. I always get mustard. What's this ketchup thing? I can't believe this. I've just never had it I've just never had it. I've never had it.

Yeah. It's beside every, every, every place in the world. Wendy's. Barbecue. It's out. I get barbecue sauce with my chicken nuggets. That's it. That's the end of the story.

Your story has just been rewritten, my friend. Okay. Because I'd actually like to talk about it because I'd like to clear a few things up. Please do. All right. So I know what sweet and sour sauce is. Okay. The way it was – wait, let me – so the way this was posed on Instagram was Frankie was like,

I was eating my Chicken McNuggets, dipping them in sweet and sour sauce, and Trent said to me, what is that? Like as if you had like – like you were from a different planet and had never seen this. of chicken McNuggets, dipping them in sweet and sour sauce. And Trent said to me, what is that? Like, as if you had like, like you were from a different planet and had never seen this. So, yeah, please clarify. All right. So, yeah, we were at the airport. I had walked to the gate.

We were on a connecting flight. We were in Chicago. We're headed back to New York City. I walked straight to the gate. Didn't stop to get any food. Frankie stopped at McDonald's to get food, walked walked to the gate sat down at a table with his chicken nuggets and his fries and he took the top off of the sweet and sour sauce it was just an open sauce container i walked over to him and i took a chicken nugget i took a took a fry and i ate that i didn't dip it in the sauce but i looked down at the sauce and i said what is that so

looking at the sauce without the top on it, just looking down on it, I didn't recognize it. I've never got McDonald's sweet and sour sauce. I just get the barbecue every single time. So I looked down and I said, what is that? And he's like, brah, brah, brah. Yeah, Frankie, short of maybe me overreacting about dumb things, Frankie is like the number one guy

in the world you don't want to make this mistake with. What do you mean you don't know I'm trying to travel around? I'm going to kill myself. It was already like a horrific travel day and now I'm on trial because he thinks I don't know what sweet and sour is. So wait, McDonald's... In reality, I just didn't see what it was.

Right, right. Then our guy Avery started taking the video and at one point I sarcastically say and it didn't land at all. I go, oh, it's sweet and it's sour, I sarcastically say, and it didn't land at all. I go, oh, it's sweet and it's sour. I get it. And people thought that I was like, I don't know what sweet and sour sauce is when I was

just being sarcastic. And then, like you're saying, it turns into a whole thing, and Frankie had tweeted about it before I even knew what was happening. I think it was a setup. Like, you knew it was coming. So, wait. There's barbecue, sweet and sour, and then is there a third? I think it was a setup like you knew it was coming so wait there's barbecue sweet and sour

and then is there isn't there a third isn't there three main sauces let me make that up McDonald's? yeah between the hot mustard and yeah but that

that's actually that's very good but that's would you say hot or honey? hot mustard oh I think honey mustard's up there too honey mustard might be up there but my thing

I still might give you a hard time because if you're at if you know someone's eating McDonald's and the sauce is not the brown barbecue sauce, it's sweet and sour. Yeah, I mean – You still should probably know that. And the other ones – I'm looking at them now. There is honey mustard, hot mustard, habanero ranch, tangy barbecue, creamy ranch, spicy buffalo, sweet and sour. Those – all the other ones you can basically throw out.

It's honey mustard, sweet and sour, and barbecue. Maybe I'd allow you to mix up honey mustard and sweet and sour. Those, all the other ones you can basically throw out. It's honey mustard, sweet and sour, and barbecue. Maybe I'd allow you to mix up honey mustard and sweet and sour, but for the most part, you've got to know that sweet and sour sauce. It just really didn't look like it. Like, the sweet and sour that I'm used to is the sweet and sour that comes with crab rangoons, and it's got that, like, orange-ish look to it. And for whatever reason, from above, it didn't look like it, and then I just didn't know what it was.

But I know what sweet and sour is. The narrative really got away from me because then Coley's tweeting about it and Clem's tweeting about it. And I just wanted to be like, I know what it is. I just didn't know what it was visually when I looked at it. I got you. But it is crazy that I'm actually kind of on your side. I'm not a huge sweet and sour guy.

Oh, I think it's the best sauce. It's hands down the best sauce. I actually just recently got into it. You know what? The hot mustard, wildly underrated. Literally never heard of it until 30 seconds ago. Wildly underrated if you put – I also – here's a take for you. I don't like Chicken McNuggets.

I like nuggets from other places. I think the McNuggets have a weird thing to them that weirds me out. You want to hear something that's just downright psychopathic? Yeah. One of my best friends, a person you know, they get Chicken McNuggets like 20 packs and they peel the skin off. That's crazy, but the skin is the problem. It's weird skin. Really?

It's weird skin. It's different skin. It's different than Wendy's. It might be different. Wendy's Chicken Nuggets are far and away the best fast food Chicken Nuggets. McNuggets are fine, but Wendy nuggets Are far and away The best fast food chicken nuggets McNuggets are fine But Wendy's are far and away the best Wendy's might just be

Some of the best chicken period Forget about fast food They're just delicious chicken For sure Yeah Now if you get the chicken strips And shit Remember the selects

Yeah I don't know if those exist anymore But See that's my point There was a different type of chicken That's different than the McNuggets And it's different for a reason Because it's better

These are the McNuggets Isn't that like the pink paste Wasn't that it's better. Is it the McNuggets? Isn't that like the pink paste? Wasn't that the thing that... It was. I think they have since changed that, but I don't know. Which is a lie. Which means they stopped letting fucking news cameras into their factories. Yes, exactly. They were like, we just gotta hide this better. Yeah, we fixed it. We fixed it. Alright, well, I just wanted to clear that up. How are... I think we were on

episode 6 of Breaking 100 most recently? Yeah, we're on episode six and then episode seven will air on thursday it's uh it's me and frankie playing at a place called village of sands point out on long island so if you want to check that out it'll be on foreplay youtube it'll be on partial sports.com we're just moving we're moving ahead we're trying to break 100 and that's that's just the goal can i tell you something i think it was saturday night maybe friday night i forget one night i got i don't know why i'm talking to the mic you're not in the mic uh but the uh the friday saturday night i got pretty drunk

and i had a dream that night that you broke 100 with me for the first time and i broke 100 because i've i don't i don't even play Yeah. And it was the two of us. We both did it together. We might have to do that. That might have to be. It might be the secret sauce. It might be the sweet and sour, baby. Sweet and sour, dude.

I think, you know what my nightmare for you would be? First of all, if you haven't watched Breaking 100 yet, go watch episode five first and watch the bunker incident. Because the bunker incident is like a scene from a movie. You know when people talk about bone tomahawk where they chop the guy in half? And they're like, you know that scene? I'm out. I'm going home. You know what you guys should have done? Reaction videos like Two Girl, One Cup.

Have bunker incident reaction videos to people just being horrified by what happened. So go watch that, episode five. What would happen? What if you broke a hundred, but like with no cameras and in unofficial capacity, somehow, some way that would suck. Well,

no, that would suck. And that's why we're filming every single round. Every time you play. Yeah. Like, even if it's not like, if somebody invites you out and they're like,

uh, yeah, you can like, you can come do it, but it's a very exclusive club, but you can't, so you can't bring cameras. I i'd be like i'm not playing yeah because that would be the day you break 100 or you make them film you the whole time yeah with the camera yeah we're at the point now where he has to film every round that i play and it's

a little it's like almost a trap because i bet if i played just normally like me and frankie a couple other guys you'd be better It's just a relaxed day. I'd probably shoot like a 93. Yeah. I was in all the cameras around the pressure. We have to film it. If the pressure gets ramped up, my heartbeat goes up and I end up sometimes not doing it,

but we have to film it around because like you're saying, it's a nightmare. If I break it, there's no camera. I got, I have faith. I think a episode, I'm going to call it now.

Episode. What would you shoot last time? 105. Oh, boy. All right, he's close. And episode five was like 103 or 104. I'm going to go episode, you're going to backslide in a week or two, and then you're going to do episode nine.

Oh, you're doing that early. It's coming. It's coming. It's coming. It's definitely coming. It's coming soon, so people should check it out. It's fun. It's a fun thing's coming. It's definitely coming. It's coming soon, so people should check it out. It's fun. It's a fun thing to do.

Me and Frankie just go out and we try to do it, but it's coming. It's coming soon. Trent, if I could make a suggestion, delay it a bit. Oh, you want to milk this? I want to get free vacations in the winter. Get through the winter. That's true. Wouldn't that be the ultimate boondoggle if Trent could actually shoot like 89 and he's just like out here hacking away?

Yeah, like think about it. If you fucking break it in August on fucking Long Island, people would have been sick to be in the Bahamas in December. Yeah, and you got to get these views, dog. You got to keep growing the brand. It's funny because I was worried. So I went down and trained with John Tillery, who's my swing coach, down in Georgia for the first episode. And after I got done down there, I was like, I have the tools to do it. And I was worried that I was going to do it after the first episode or the second episode.

And then as soon as I did those episodes, I was like, this could last until 2022. It's one thing to know everything and know how to do everything right. It's far, far different. To do it. It's far more difficult to go out and know how to do everything right, it's far, far different. To do it. It's far more difficult to go out and execute it, so it could be a while or it could be the next episode. Who knows? Alright, keep it up and we'll talk to you soon.

Alright, man. Later, bro. Alright, top fives. Today is top five SNL cast members. I was going to say characters, but no. Cast members. Who has the first pick? It's huge. It's me. That say characters, but no. Cast members. Who has the first pick? It's huge.

It's me. That's bullshit, but okay. No, it is. It was because you three last time was fucked for the top five. You're right. You are right. Okay. But also, I don't think it's huge because I don't think I'm going to take who you're

going to take. Okay. Although now I want to take who you're going to take. So I'm trying to think who you would take. I actually put myself in a pretzel, so I don't know who I'm going to take. I thought I had one in mind, and then you said that, and I was like, wait a minute, maybe it's not as clear cut, but now I don't know

who you think I'm going to take. Fuck, we're both fucked. Okay. So I am going to go... Oh, people are going to hate this so bad. So I'm a... SNL was a thing me and my dad did in the 90s it was like when i was growing up it was i got to stay up late watch snl that was like my reward for

failing out of school um and i think so i so those are obviously all about the nostalgia those are all my characters and let's also say there there are certain like legends of snl in the comedy world that people how did you not pick this? And it's like, I don't know, man. I just didn't watch that season or those episodes or whatever, so fuck off. But yeah. Alright. Okay, and this is

not... This dude is laboring over this. It's hard because people are going to get very... These are going to be the meanest... Someone's going to call me the N-word if I have the wrong tweet. These are the kind of things where I'm going to be like, my favorite SNL member is this, and they're going to be like, you cheated on your wife, you fucking loser! Dude, I just like that skit, man.

Sorry. Okay. Okay. I'm going to go Farley. Because I can't miss pick. I will be honest. I wanted to go someone else, but I'm going that way, so you don't call me the N-word. So I was going to go with something else that I'm going to go with, and then Farley crept into my head.

I was like, oh, wait a minute. I got to think about Chris Farley. There is no shame in the number one pick being Chris Farley, by the way. No. No shame in that game. The only reason I wouldn't, except my number one pick, and my pick here is Will Ferrell. That was going to be my pick, but I switched it because of you. You son of a bitch!

And I almost switched it because you got it to my head. No! Because. I'll trade you one for one. Nope. Nope. I'm going Will Ferrell because here's the thing. Chris Farley, motivational speaker, all that shit,

living in a van down by the river, Schlitz beer. Actually, that's him going through it. Maybe it is the better pick. But when I think – my favorite parts of Chris Farley are his movies. I don't know. Actually, now as I'm thinking about it. He's got some classics. My point is going to be, I think Chris Farley was good, great

at SNL, and then he did Tommy Boy and he did his movies that were even better. Whereas, I think you can make the argument that Will Ferrell's Old School was my favorite, and he did a lot of movies, but a lot of them are kind of like duds. I think Will Ferrell's SNL shit is at him him at his best i drive a dodge stratus like he has some moments i think we're probably peak will farrell where i think peak farley might have actually come in the

movies i don't know i mean as i start to did you did you have best of like did you like the dvds yeah oh that's when you start to just rattle through their best skits all in a row. It's like, oh, I forgot about that. Oh, I forgot about that. Oh, yeah. Oh, that one. And then all of a sudden. So that's what I'm thinking about with Chris Farley now.

I'm like, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe Chris Farley's SNL wasn't in the movie. But the thing is, too, Farley was such a physical comedian. Yep. And that's not really my favorite. Like, the Chippendale skit is probably his most famous. I don't really care for that one. Yeah.

Like, it's fine. Like, it's not. I don't think I've ever belly laughed at it. Right. Like, I like the guy who was on Weekend Update with Dormy Tom. It's like, it's fine. Like, it's not, like, I don't think I've ever belly laughed at it. Right. Like, I like the guy who was on Weekend Update with Dormant Donald where it's like,

so I don't have good eyes, so I don't own a toothbrush. Yes, yes. I love the Chris Farley show. Like, remember that time you were in the Beatles? Yeah, that was awesome. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's just, like, so cringey. And then, I mean, Matt Foley's motivational speaker down by the river. Matt Foley is classic. I mean, yelling, I live in a van

down by the river on government cheese and all that shit is absolutely classic. But Will Ferrell, I think I just consumed the most of that. Because we were young, too, for Chris Farley. Whereas Ferrell was more of our wheelhouse. And his Robert Goulet skits, I don't even really get it. I don't really know Robert Goulet or why that's funny or why he get it. I don't really know Robert Goulet or why that's funny or why he did it, but it's so fucking funny.

I don't know why he was ever like, I'm going to just do this Robert Goulet thing. I forget the actress he did it with, but the cheerleaders. Yes, Spartan cheerleaders. I was a Spartan cheerleader. The only couples costume I could ever tolerate. It was the Spartan cheerleaders.

You did it with? My college girlfriend. No shit. And I would do a couples costume. Now I don't give a fuck, but back then it was like, you're a fucking pussy. You gotta dress up with your girlfriend in costume.

But she was like- Will you join each other's company or something? Fucking loser. Yeah. I had some guy dressed as the yellow M&M being like, you fucking loser. But she was like, let's do a couple's costume. I was like, that's so cool.

And she pitched that. Who was that? Who was it? Sherry O'Terry. Sherry O'Terry. Yes, exactly. But the lovers, the hot tub skin lover. Have you ever seen his audition?

His audition is amazing. Because I think he does the Dodge Stratus one where he's yelling at his... Or he's grilling. He's pretending to grill and I think he's yelling at his family. But he walks up. It's just an empty stage and he's like, I'm Will Ferrell. And he's pretending to grill and yelling dead silent, no laughs. It's just

like, you gotta really be fucking good to stick that with no feedback. With no laughter. This is funny. I know it's funny. I was doing a skit and someone didn't laugh in the first 30 seconds. With no laughter. This is funny. If I started doing a skit and someone didn't laugh in the first 30 seconds, I'd be like, I'm out.

I quit. I'm going to be the plumber. Absolutely. So, I mean, you can't go wrong with either of them, but I just personally enjoy, like,

I consumed Feral the most. Okay. Man. Fuck. This is really hard. It's really hard to go off top, too. I think I'm going to go Sandler. Okay. Man. Fuck. This is really hard. It's really hard to go off top, too. I think I'm going to go Sandler.

And again, Sandler was, again, I'm a 90s kid. RA is going to text me that I don't have Belushi in the top two. Are you going to take Belushi? No. Okay. But. Because he's also very physical. Farley had other things, but Bel Belushi, he's a little too physical for me.

I also – like I can't tell you Belushi skits off the top of my head. I don't know them. I don't think I've watched them. I really don't. I mean I don't know them that well. I think about – I don't know 80s. You were saying Farley in like the movies. Yeah.

Like Animal House, stuff like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Blues Brothers. But the – I mean Sandler – I feel like we just – we did something. We've definitely come back around. But there was like a 15-year stretch where we pretended Sandler wasn't fucking hilarious. Well, he did put out some movies that were just like crudely stupid. I understand.

But like – That doesn't mean he's not funny. Yeah. It doesn't mean what he's done isn't funny. Well, you know what happened too? Like the Billy Madison humor where he's like doing silly voices like was super funny and then jim carrey was doing it too and then i think it like went away and we liked like you had to be more witty vince vaughn type of humor and now i think it kind of is back around again where it's like i don't know he's goofy and silly and you do like

dumb shit and it doesn't matter i completely agree but i think the reason it went away is because he made it so popular we just got sick of it. Yeah. Like so many stupid people were doing it. And we're like, you're not fucking Stanley. Fuck off. It's not Stanley. It does take a...

I wouldn't find anybody else doing that kind of shit funny, but I do find him funny. Same thing with Jim Carrey doing Ace Ventura type humor. Right. I would hate that from someone else. But that was funny. Weird that Jim Carrey was such an in-limbing color guy and never SNL. Why?

Just because he's a monster. You just figure... In-limbing color was like the black version of SNL, how I always thought it. And he's not black, so I thought eventually he would have done SNL. But I always said he's smart. Yeah, he was like the one.

Fire Marshall Bill and all that shit. But he also did pretty good. That year, man, he did The Mask, Ace Ventura, and another one. What's his other big one? It was all in the same calendar year. Dumb and Dumber? Dumb and Dumber. That was all in the same calendar year?

I think it was 94, all in like one year. Shut up. Was it later in that year? No, that was a little bit later, I think. Don't quote me on that, but I think quote me on that. I mean, that's as hot a run as you can have. They were all like in one year or like 18 months or something like bananas where it was just like, oh, yeah, he's top of the game. I know 94 is like considered like the best movie.

The movie year. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I will go with Norm MacDonald. Dude, he's so hit or miss with me too. with Norm Macdonald. Ah, dude. He's so hit or miss with me too. We're like, some stuff I forget what Norm he has like one rather viral clip of on a talk show.

I think he's on Conan. And he tells like some story. I can't even remember it. But it's just so fucking funny. It's so deadpan. But there's a lot of him that I think that it just doesn't miss. Yeah. I want to say miss because he's fucking Norm Macdonald. Just that for you.

Yeah. It's just not my style. I mean, him, his celebrity jeopardy with Will Foe. Yeah. Yeah. Oh,

Bert Reynolds doing the big hat. You know, it's funny because it's a big hat. It's bigger than usual hat like that. He was just like himself with that, like voice and that style too. I think he did a weekend update for a while. Right. So that was like a usual hat. He was just like himself with that voice and that style too. I think he did a weekend update for a while, right? So that was like a weekend update.

I think it's like one of the only still surviving good bits. By the way, while we talk about SNL, just like to point out, as we all know, that SNL could have had Shane Gillis and had Tim Robinson for years. And he was writing like tons of skits. And as it was told to me, I don't know if this was an exaggerated number or a literal number. But the person told me that, like, he only got, like, two skits on TV ever.

They only aired, like, two of his skits. And maybe that was an exaggeration. It's more than that. But it was still, like, they were not using him enough. So imagine if Gillis and Tim Robinson were doing skits every weekend right now. I mean, it would be, like, must-see TV. They can't miss so uh yeah i'll take norm i'll take norm all right number three i'm going to eat a fay i actually think tfa was the person who like got me into uh like you know like it really hooked me in because i thought she was so god damn well she she's definitely part of

like the the the second wave or third wave, depending on how much you watch. But, like, you know, after the Farleys and the Sandlers, I feel like it kind of died down. And then Faye was a big part of the later years. Resurgence. I mean, she was a head writer for a while, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think so. Yep.

Yep. Weekend Update is, I agree with you, like, it's my favorite thing. Yep. And she was who introduced me to Weekend Update is, I agree with you, it's my favorite thing. Yep. And she was who introduced me to Weekend Update. Yep. I'm going to go, may he rest in peace, Phil Hartman. Oh! Yeah.

Good answer. I think. I actually, again, I know his later stuff. I actually don't know much Phil Hartman on SNL. See, I kind of almost think the opposite. I think of SNL when I think. He was like, obviously did well.

I think of, what's Chris's movie? Jingle All The Way. Yeah, so he did Jingle All The Way. He was on news radio. He definitely had hits and success. But I feel like he was, and maybe I'm wrong, but I feel like he was on for a long time like where a lot of guys like stepping stone and then blew up and gone but i

feel like phil harman was there for a while doing a lot of skits so no can i i did oh man people gonna hate this one because because i think the opposite of what we're saying. When people think of him now... Whoa. ...those eardrums out, huh? Jeez, sauce! What is that? My phone's attached to my computer. We need to gif and caption contest that. What noise is playing in the headphones right now?

Ah! I'm awake. But my number four, and again, this is nostalgia-based and yada, yada, yada, yada. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I actually do think he's a cool guy. It's Jimmy Fallon. And I get the complaints about his interview style, which also I get very self-conscious about.

Because we do that. That's what I do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know about you, but I'm an over-laugher. I know. Yeah, yeah. But his Nomar skit killed me. They were so fucking funny.

It's a Will Ferrell the hot tub skit is with Jimmy Fallon. There's one where Will Ferrell and I think Kristen Wiig are making out and being over the top. And Jimmy Fallon is just uncontrollably laughing.

I love that one. He has no shot. He would break. In SNL, I think it's perfect. It's live, and it's not scripted, and you're laughing. I think it was a good thing that he couldn't, and there would be guys keeping it, like Will Ferrell just trying to get through the scale, keep it, keep it, and he's just dying

laughing. Some people will hate that pick, but I think it's a good pick. In the 90s, he was the king. Yeah. Not king, but you know what I mean. No, he was like that... He was probably the main guy of SNL for a while. Yeah.

It was maybe the dark years, but he was that dude. I'm going to go... This is my fourth pick? Yes. With... I'm going to go Bill Hader. Are you? fourth pick yes with uh i'm gonna go bill hater are you yeah i think i think he was a good um he was a like a bright spot in in recent years where i think it was like snl sucks but except for bill hater i i love hater and he also has like i I honestly think this is one of the more inspiring stories

of all time not of all time but you know and Frank was pretty good too but it's more like a believe in yourself like a believe in yourself anecdote which is him and Andy Samberg riding the elevator together I've actually probably told you this because I think it is like such a cool story but him and Andy Samberg were the elevator together. I've actually probably told you this, because I think it is such a cool story.

But him and Andy Samberg were both going to their audition at SNL, and Samberg had a bag full of props. And Hader was there, and he was like, what the fuck? He has fucking props. Why do I not have any props? And later, he learned Samberg was going, he doesn't even have any props.

What the fuck? And they both went up there and crushed it. Be yourself. Do what you're good at. Different types of humor. Yeah, for sure. That's unbelievable. That's great.

When is... Barry? Yeah. I don't know. Did that get fucked because of COVID? Did that not shoot it? I feel like it's about time for that next season, bro. Oh, it's my turn.

Five. Fifth and final. Five is gonna be... I mean, there is a monumentally important person that I don't think either of us are gonna pick, and people like Rui Ramon are gonna go absolutely apeshit over it. Someone other than Belushi?

Yes. Man, I don't fucking know. Yeah. There's a few. Nah, Carell? No. No. Eddie Murphy, yes. But I just like...

I know, I know. If I'm being honest, it depends. How are we doing top fives? Are we doing like what I think or are we trying to assemble like the best fucking arguments? No, I'm doing my personal favorites. I haven't seen... think or if we're trying to assemble like the best fucking argument to be my personal right that's what i mean if i were if i were to to round out my last pick if i wanted to make the best squad i would pick eddie murphy i don't know i know the uh the mr robinson's neighborhood and i know i was gonna say like i'm chris rock i'd love to take i don't i'm gonna tell you a character well

i don't think he i don't think he was on for that like i don't think he had that much an illustrious snl career did he i i don't think so but that's the point it's like you know it's like yeah i read in college i read the book uh i read a book um just one um the it was just about like it was about farley and it's just like letters from friends and chris rock had like he was on his time on snl with farley and he had a line i thought was so weird where he's like i I remember watching them film Chippendale skit. And I was like, that's the day we lost Chris.

I knew that day he was going to die. I was like, why? Because he was a fat guy acting fat. That seems like a little overdramatic. Yeah. He said it was so offensive and offensive. I didn't realize how fat he was until I saw that sort of thing. No, no.

I think it was just like that was the day. Like, I forget exactly how his tone sort of thing. No, no. I think it was just like that was the day. I forget exactly how his tone was. Yeah, weird though. But it was like, oh, yeah, he's going to go off the deep end now because we did this. But I'll go fucking. Okay. I got.

Because of weekend update, I said, Seth Meyers? No. Oh, okay. We're still good then. He was on my list, but no, that's not it. Yeah. And I actually don't care if Seth Meyers show now. Yeah, but um but i love seth meyer's how we can update i i'm thinking so while acknowledging that eddie murphy is like probably the biggest fucking comics ever go through snl like yes i understand that there's there's i mean a ton of others i mean dana carvey

was a huge one oh i love dana carvey's a huge one. Oh, I love Dana Carvey. Dana Carvey was a huge one. I'm thinking about that. I loved, I thought when I was really watching, Daryl Hammond was like the impressions guy. Like, he did all the really good impressions. I think it's a, like, again, if you're drafting a team, it's like, all right, I need the impressions guy. I need the weekend update guy.

I need this and that. Like, Daryl Hammond would be my impressions guy. Another inspiring story. He used to just, someone asked me how he got so good at impressions he said he'd get a bottle of whiskey and just watch that person and then just sit there just figure it out drunk and watch tv i still think i was like what a guy i was like seven i was like that's what i want to do because he did he did clinton so well during uh during that era like. Clinton was so important.

And he did someone else. I mean, tons of people. But it was Clinton and one other person. I thought he actually. Dana Carvey, church lady. I remember when he was interviewing Anne Hash and he was trying to ask her if she wants a taco or a hot dog. And he's like, well, just figure it out. You can't keep wondering.

Which, by the way, probably wouldn't be okay today. I was going to say, you can't keep wondering. Which, by the way, probably wouldn't be okay today. I was going to say, you can't do that. But then also, you go to the other things, and you're like, oh, I just wouldn't find that funny anymore. I don't think, like, turtle, turtle. I don't think that one would hit for me anymore. But it was funny at the time for some reason. I'm going to go, though, I'm going to go recent.

That's a little tip of the cap, because they're the only guys still doing it. I think I'm going to take Michael. That's a little tip of the cap because they're like the only guys still doing it. I think I'm going to take Michael Che. Great one. Che and Jost, I think, are a great duo of Weekend Update that can like not, you know, I'm not going to take them number one as my Weekend Update duo, but they can go toe-to-toe with anybody. And then recently, the most recent joke swap in this season. Yeah.

And Michael Che is playing dirty because he can do the racist jokes and Joe's can't. Joe's is doing like you have tiny dick jokes and Che is doing like KKK jokes. Yeah. You get blown out of the water. But Michael Che, I'll take as my modern day guy. I think Che's, I don't know if it's his most recent standup, but the one

where he's in the yellow sweatshirt, I think is one of the more underrated stand-ups of the last five years or so. I don't remember what he's wearing, but I think we're talking about the same thing. Because is he in like a, he's kind of like in a, he's not like a state. It's not a state. He comes out a little bit. He's circular almost. He's kind of like. Like a stage Gaga would design.

Yeah, it comes out for sure. That is some of the most like low-key just talking to you and just like spitting fucking jokes and facts that are hilarious all right so let us know and get outraged about eddie murphy and john belushi and you know all that shit um i don't care about those i i'm worried that there's like someone i genuinely like that i miss who would you take nick anybody we missed uh i'm trying to think off the top, but there is one skit that, like, I would have picked Rachel Dratch just for Debbie Downer. That first Debbie Downer, the rest of it. On 30 Rock, she's like, I forget what she is on 30 Rock, but her character just annoys me. So I kind of write her off now.

Did you guys say Sandberg? We mentioned him with Hater, but Lonely Islander, yeah. The digital shorts, like, at, like, 40 million. I went through, like, a wormhole, yeah. The digital shorts, like at like 40 million. I went through like a wormhole and like was watching like Dick in the Box and Mother Lover. Dick in the Box and I Just Had Sex and all those are. I mean, Sudeikis. I actually don't like Andy Samberg, though. I never care for him.

It depends on character. I mean, I love him. One of my favorite movies, recent movies is Palm Springs. I think it's a great, great movie. But yeah, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, it doesn't care for me. Which people love. That got canceled. It's a big deal.

Also, you could have said Kenan Thompson if he's been on the show for 80 years. Yeah, I was watching... I feel like that's almost an indictment. His Steve Harvey is hilarious. That is very funny. And I love Kenan, but I almost feel like the fact that he hasn't left. I mean, he went from all that to SNL. He's like, this is all he's ever done.

Yeah. He does it well. I was watching a clip of Keenan and Kel the other day. The Tuna one. You know what I'm talking about? What's about the Tuna one? It was like... Were you watching a Keenan and Kel clip the other day?

Yeah. How? Jack and Five Jones had retweeted it. Oh, okay. And it was like, He was on trial, and it was just Kel. You want to talk about an indictment? Where did Kel go?

I think he's back doing all that again. Oh, yeah? I know there was a rumor that he died of an OD, but there was really something. It was Kel yelling. I think he said, I put the screw in the tuna. He was on trial for like there was something in the tuna. And the whole skit is just him screaming, I put the screw in the tuna.

And he yells to the judge. I mean, that's it, the whole skit. And it was like, what the fuck? I mean, not really. Oh, okay. I don't understand why it was funny, but it was. Well, the tweet was like, we thought this was the peak of comedy. And I mean, I don't remember that specific one, but I do remember Keenan and Kel, and I do remember all that.

But they were like kids doing ridiculous skits, and then Keenan just kept doing it as a fucking adult. Who loves our soda? Yeah, like even that. Good burger, welcome to Good Burger. I've never seen it. It's not. the good burger like oh wow I've never seen it it's it's it's not yeah someone

tried to show me it late in life and I was like this doesn't work I'm sure it's not very good just like Space Jam I'm sure

I mean the Space Jam outrage is just like crazy 40 year old men are like this movie's not good it's a children's movie like come on guys

come the fuck on now I've heard that it's that it's like the product placement is like like, overwhelmingly obnoxious. If you want to talk about that, like, critique a movie where it's, like, one giant commercial, okay. But if it's not a good, like, slapstick Looney Tunes cartoon. I mean, also, if you go into it with, like, I thought that, like, Looney Tunes is funny and this is not a funny version of it fine but these people are going into it like this wasn't worth like uh you know

my date night with like my girl or something like that yeah i don't know you probably shouldn't watch the fucking children's movie the uh by the way what you just said product placement it reminded me of this morning when i was getting on the ferry a bunch so a bunch of us came to stay down at our house this weekend. And so me, Nate, Liz, Donnie, someone else, I forget, came back on the boat this morning. And as we're getting on the boat, I had a water bottle in my back pocket. And Liz goes, is that a Crystal Pepsi? I was like, is this a drink that they stopped making in 1996 that I'm drinking at 6 a.m. on a Monday?

Also, like, people drink bottles of water all the time. Like, if it was a regular bottle of water. If you had, like, an orange drink and she said, is that orange soda? And you were like, no, it's not. You know what I mean? There's a very obvious, real, correct answer. It's the most popular drink in the world, bottled water. Is that a Crystal Pepsi?

When did Crystal Pepsi stop being made? What's Crystal Pepsi? You don't even know? Do you know what Crystal Pepsi is? There was a time. You don't know? Yeah, of course not. They made Pepsi look like Sprite.

It was just clear. Instead of black, it was called Crystal Pepsi. 1994. I was so glad. I actually think I said 94 when I talked to her. I changed it to 96. I was like,

did you guys think this is a drink that they stopped making in 94? No. And then they did a reboot at some point relatively recently. I think they tried

to bring it back. Do you remember Pepsi Blue? I remember that shit. Yeah, that. Crystal Clear Pepsi was a, I remember so vividly, this is how old it was. It was Van Halen right now was the commercial.

Shut the fuck up. And that was like, it was out of the time. That was the jam. And it was like, right now is the time for crystal clear Pepsi. Get a refreshing crystal clear Pepsi. And it bombed so hard because it's like drinking milk when you think you're getting OJ. You know what I mean? It was just like, Sprite, Sprite, Sprite, Sprite, Sprite.

Nope, Pepsi. So weird. My family bought all of the racks, so I still have a bunch of them. You have them? No, I don't. No, the Pepsis, the Crystal Clears. What? No, the Crystal Clear Pepsis.

Yeah. No, we didn't actually buy them. Well, because I know there was a dude, the LA Beast, I think is his name. He does like food challenge YouTube stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he got off of eBay. He bought a Crystal Clear Pepsi from 1994 and opened it up and drank it. And he like vomited over it.

It would be $9 right now. Yeah. Oh, really? I think we should get it and put it on the- It actually, I think they brought it back this summer. Yeah. It was very recent then. Okay.

Well, maybe he's not that crazy then. No, but that's not what she was thinking. Get the fuck out of here. But also- This dude, he opened it up. It was also one of those glass grenade-shaped ones. They were like a

pint or something like that. And he took it one sip and puked everywhere. The buying pallets of drinks when you hear the least surprising thing in the history of the world is that when four locals going out of business gas bought like all of them yeah like dude gas's bedroom at his old apartment like back this is back in alston like would it was just there was

a full stack of original four locos until i don't know four or five years after they stopped serving them just keep drinking them? Yeah. I think Gaz would probably just give them to other people. I don't think he would drink them. It was like Jeter gift baskets. You fuck a girl and take an original Four Logo with you. You want a Four Logo? Shout out to Gaz and his abs, bro. Yeah.

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Nope. Only can wear sunglasses when it's sunny out in the summer. Shadyrays.com. Promo code KFC for 50% off. Let's do our voicemails. What do we got? Okay. So instead of starting off with the voicemails today, we've got our new summer intern, Mike, has, I guess, what is this, a recording of his buddy or something?

Yeah, it's my buddy's buddy. It's his first day on the job. Okay, so his first day on the job as a cold caller. And I guess we got audio of it, and I'm sure he's terrible at this. hello i'm gonna help you hey i was looking to speak with the owner of is that you by chance depends who are you how can i help you my name is I thought it was funny No, no, okay, so yeah Hey man, I'm with Have you heard of us before, man? Dude, you suck at your job

You suck You're horrible Why don't you play pretend with the mirror With a friend You suck. You're horrible. Why don't you play pretend with the mirror with a friend or a classmate or one of your gay boyfriends or something? Hey, come on. You made me laugh when you said that. Hey, come on now. Pull that dick out of your mouth.

Pull it out. Pull it out. I'm in homophobic. You gotta prepare or pull the dick out of your ass. Jesus. You suck, man. You suck, dude. Jesus.

What's he got to do with it? You suck at this job. Run away. You're horrible. Oh, my God. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man.

Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man.

Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man.

Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man.

Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. Hey, man. You suck! Hey, man, your website looks pretty off to me. Whoa, your website!

You're looking at my website. You want to look at my cock? You fucking f***ing nut. Oh, wow, I called it. I'm not noticing. Dude, we have to replay that call, bro. Oh, my God. That guy was insane.

Fuck. Yo, that guy absolutely has or is going to murder people. That guy has some anger issues. He's like yelling at your buddy like he's like Like he's 30 years into the career You should start doing You know it's a summer job man You leave me the fuck alone He didn't

You know he wasn't The greatest off the top He was bad at the top He was right until he started dropping F-bombs Yeah he wasn't very articulate He didn't like get to it He chuckled weirdly But then

A nervous laugh is A guy who does a lot of nervous laughs. Totally a normal... Right away? You're going to call me on that? But I mean, that was outrageous. Take the dick out of your mouth. No, no, no. Take the dick out of your ass.

Practice with your little boyfriends. Dude, when he just goes... Jesus. Jesus. That is so good. oh we got to get rudy in here yeah that made me think of rudy we'll do that on thursday we'll do that thursday episode okay okay he goes like like dude i don't give a fuck about your website jesus christ that guy absolutely beats beats people in his family that guy kicks the dog Dude, I don't give a fuck about your website. Jesus Christ. That guy absolutely beats people in his family.

That guy kicks the dog. That guy's an abuser. That dude has children to kick the shit out of them. I'm getting tired of this one. We've got to have another one so I can beat that one too. New toddler smack around. Jesus. That is unbelievable.

Oh, the way he delivered that. It's so good. Did your boy just come home and he was like, yo, you'll never understand the day I had to work? Yeah, it's my buddy's buddy, so I think that he just gave up after that. I'm not sure. I think that it's over for him. Dude, that would be I'd probably end up milking that one. I'd be like, I'm suing

this company. You subjected me to abuse. Bro, I would call that guy back every day. We should get that guy's number. We should get that guy's number. We'll do callbacks and just torture him. See, your website's looking a little messy. My website! We didn't talk!

Dude. I actually want to get that guy's number and sick the stoolies on him and ruin his life. Ruin his life. Just every night in the middle of the night have someone call me and go, take the dick out of your ass. Wow. The life of like cold calling. I know that's the only reason I work here is because my dad wouldn't give me a job. Because he was like, he was like, and it wasn't his company, but he was like, look, I can get you a job at the call center.

You don't want that. But you're going to be a cold caller, and you're going to kill yourself in three weeks. I cannot fathom anyone ever having success at a cold call. No. Like, it has to work, right? Well, you hit lonely people. And they're like, oh, I think I have someone to talk to. I guess, right?

And then they pay money, and then they're like, yeah, I'm so lonely, I'm going to talk to i guess right but then they and then and then they pay money then they're like yeah i'm so lonely i'll talk to you and then get my get my credit card out i guess yeah right i can see like the boiler room shit where you call up like unsuspecting people and be like i can make you five thousand dollars right now and you're desperate and you're just like okay sure what is it like it's a penny stock or whatever yeah but like this you know we just need to update your website. I mean, I guess you just get lucky every now and then where it's like, you know, I need a website and lo and behold, the phone rang and like,

here you are. I might, I might as well just take you. I forget what the company he said was. I think we're going to bleep it out anyway. But like when he was like, have you heard of us? Absolutely not.

As someone who works on the internet and does. I was going to say that, you know, it's not like he said, like, have you heard of, um, have you heard of like say that. Absolutely not. It's not like he said, have you heard of monster.com or something. It's just like, no. Your bullshit company, I've never fucking heard of it, man.

Get out of here. Wow. Well, to all the cold callers out there, if you got any, I'm sure if he could dig up his recording, I'm sure other people can. If you've got apps, like, man, this guy's so mad. Jesus Christ. This guy really, really hates it. He's, like, getting exhausted. Jeez. My friend actually sends it to me on the day that I'm starting here.

He's like, are you excited for your day tomorrow? I'm like, yeah. He's like, well, look how my buddy's first day just like can't go anywhere. Like, yeah, seriously. Like, be thankful you got that gig instead of this shit. If you've got cold call

classic audio recordings, send it our way. It's got to be good. But if you've got a moment that stacks up to Jesus. Can I hear it one more time, please? Can I hear it one more? Jesus. Can I hear it one more time, please? Can I hear it one more time?

Jesus. You're looking at my website. You want to look at my cock? Jeez. I don't even know what to say to this. He's thinking there's nowhere in the binder. There's no page to turn to to react to this. Jesus.

So good. Throw it back. I'm going to throw up. Or pull the dick out of your ass. Jesus. You suck, man. Jesus. Jesus. I have a stomach ache and I'm crying. Jeez.

How old are you, Mike? How old is he? 22. 22. Jeez. That's got to be the most entertaining day in cold calling history. I almost hope that. I wish that. If I was a cold caller, I wish that once a day I could close someone and once a day I'd get that.

Jesus. All right. Next up. What's up, guys? I'm a bit speechless right now. I just hit a goose. I mean, I smashed it, obliterated it. This thing just went into a cloud of feathers after I hit it.

I felt the car go right over it. Yeah, I feel a little bad right now. Dude. I've got a serious question for you. Am I the asshole in this? I mean, this flock of fucking geese just flew right in front of me. No chance for me to move. Birds flew right in front, landed, started walking.

Didn't scatter as I got a little closer, and I just crunched it. It felt like I was going over a speed bump. I mean, I had my daughter in the back. It was raining. I didn't want to daughter in the back. It was raining. I didn't want to slam on the brakes. It was hydroplaning. So I kind of just let it go, and I'm a case murderer,

goose murderer, whatever the fuck you want to call it. So am I the asshole for this fucking goose? Because I think it's the fucking goose. Dude, I didn't know what he said at first. I thought he said, I hit a goof. And that was some sort of phrase like, I fucked up. I hit a goof. And that was some sort of phrase like I fucked up.

I hit a goof. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was like, what did you do? I hit a goof. There's fucking feathers everywhere. I mean, I just. The way he describes it, like there's hitting geese, and then there's this guy.

He's like, I mean, I just obliterated this thing. When he goes, he goes, but I got a serious question. I was hoping it was going to be a completely new topic. Who do you think built the pyramids? I mean, this is famous Costanza. We had a deal. We have a deal. You get out of the road.

You get out of the fucking way. What's the point of having fucking wings and the gift of flight if you're just going to waddle your ass on the fucking street and get crunched by a car? No, it's the goose. The goose. Yeah, the move. That might have been goose suicide for all we know. The Native Americans could hear

horses coming from everywhere. If you're on the street, you should feel a car coming far, far away. Native Americans. Yeah, you're on the street, you should feel a car coming far, far away. But I'm good. Yeah, you're right. I just know you invoke the Native American name. Okay.

Yep. Yep. But there is. That's the famous joke. Buffalo come. What? Like, there's some, I don't know the whole setup, but, you know, this guy and this Indian, this Native American put their ear to the ground.

He says, Buffalo come. He says, really? ear to the ground. He says, Buffalo, come. He says, really? You can hear them? He goes, no, sticky. I haven't heard that. But the – I'm just kidding. I one time – Have you hit a goose?

No, not a goose. I hit a raccooncoon i believe it was and it is to this day the most horrifying thing that's ever happened to me because i it was at night i was driving through westport mass which is like a kind of a little out there where my parents live now but at the time i lived in fall river and um it's like so kind of a little country. And I was driving down a dark road late at night. That's when they come out, yeah. And it stood up on its back legs and put its hands up like, oh, no! Stop!

And I fucking smoked. And I saw its face. It's like chest and head hit your front, your grill. Right in my license plate. I saw the fear in its eyes. Like, if that raccoon could talk, it would have said, like, no! I have a family! Like, we made eye contact.

And I was like, dude, it's too late. It's too late. I can't stop anymore. And you know raccoons have those little human voice. And they were up. They were like, no! And I had little fingers out. And I fucking probably beheaded the thing.

I've always wondered that. When you see roadkill on the side of the road, does that mean they get hit and then they limp to the side? Do they just skid across the road? I've never... I don't know. No, he just hit it. But then they like... How do they get to the side of the road? I guess...

Like in the shoulder. I feel like that must be like they get hit and they're still alive and they limp. I like to think that they almost made it. Yeah. Every time. I mean, how dumb you got to be to get to be roadkill? I mean, you're a real fucking asshole. Oh, I disagree.

I mean, just don't go out there, man. Okay. Good point. Counterpoint. I was going to say it's on us for building interstates through woods and stuff. We'll just don't go. If we went off-roading and ran through them, we're the assholes. We built a road.

There's a ton of traffic, and you decided to just try to cross this road? Like, wait until there's no cars coming. Learn how to cross the road, raccoon. Left, you fucking bitch. Come on. Red light or some shit, man. I don't think I've ever hit anything because i'm a good driver oh i've hit i've hit things just do humans count

jackie you ever have any roadkill yeah grandpa he was super dramatic about it the i you know what i hate hitting i think that's the only alive thing i've ever hit um but i hate hitting things that are already dead yeah you just but you feel it for them yeah just eradicate them it's like like flesh flying yeah no it's gross i mean you know they if you hit the big a big enough thing like we were talking about that great dana almost hit like a moose like they fuck you up man you you hit them and your car's wrapping around that shit you know what i learned by way, do you know what? My cousin got hit by a car, and it is real that, like, your shoes do fly off.

Really? Because she went flying. Yeah. Is he okay? It was awesome. Yeah, he's fine. I think you met him. Like, he's good.

All right. I learned, I was listening to Whitney Cummings' podcast. You know she's, like, an animal freak? Yeah. And she was using it kind of as a metaphor. It's an interesting one. Kind of saying, like, when you're about to like get in a fight whether physical or

or like verbal like you gotta like keep calm and you know fight the the reflex to like jump or go at them or whatever you know and she said she talked about moose and grizzly bears try to take

down moose and and grizzly bears try to take down moose, and they charge them, and the moose just waits and waits and waits, like William Wallace, like hold, hold, hold. And at the last second, they just put their back foot out, and the fucking grizzly bear just runs into it and just fucking breaks its whole body. Really?

Into a moose leg, and they just sit there, and they're just like eating, doing whatever moose do, and they're like, come get some. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, come get some. And at the last second, pow. They got it. Because they say, you're not supposed to run, right?

From anything. Well, like, prey runs. Yeah, you gotta get big. Think about it. Yeah, yeah. But I don't even know if that really works. It definitely works. But I think...

Imagine fighting a little person, and they just go, rah! I'm still way bigger than you. I'm just going to kick your ass. If they did that, I would be like, you're a little person trying to scare me. But if I went up to a little kid and I was like, I'm about to fuck you up, and they were just like, yeah, come get some. I'd be like, wait a second. This thing is – this little kid is scary.

This is like Habib's brother. What's his name? Hasbulla. Hasbulla. Yeah. Yeah, I'd be like, wait a minute. Maybe he's not... This little kid is scary. This is like Habib's brother. What's his name? Hasbulla. Hasbulla. Yeah. Yeah, I'd be like, wait a minute. Maybe he's not a little kid. Try it, bitch.

Yeah, come get... Never mind. Exactly. If a little kid was like, come get some, you fucking... Like that guy. Fucking F word. I'd be like, all right, never mind, bro. Jesus.

All right. Let's do one more voicemail, and then we got Camille. Time to get some therapy. Speaking of therapy and therapists, where's our pet? Our class pet. Yeah, where's Richard? Well, you guys said no. No, we said yes.

We said yes to all of them. Then you guys said that you were going to, like, abuse this animal. Well, no. We said nothing of the sort. It was going to be on a farm, and it was going to get beheaded. We said we were going to let it free farm and it was going to get beheaded. We said we were going to let it free range. We were going to let it roam.

Okay, well then, if I bring in a gerbil on Wednesday, are you guys going to complain? Nope, not at all. Might kill it, but not complain. Nick, am I allowed to bring in a gerbil? I believe the rules were you have to take care of the gerbil and keep it at your house. And you are the person who puts things in your butt. I believe the rules were we were each going to switch off weeks.

Oh, that's definitely not the rule. Again, I have you. We were all going to switch off. You think I'm bringing a gerbil to my goddamn house? I feel like I forgot to run that by you guys, but that was my idea. It was like we each take a week. Yeah, you definitely forgot that. Here's the deal.

There's 52 weeks in a year. You will take care of the gerbil for 52 weeks. Shake on it. Deal? Deal. You just got yourself a gerbil. Sold. You can bring it in every now and then.

Richard can hang out here. We'll scare some guests. It's also, I thought about it, like dick. Like an ass. Yeah. Dick and ass. Dick and ass. Dick and ass. Yep.

Yep. How was your weekend, Jackie? Jackie, how many days were in this weekend? Let's say there was Friday night, Saturday night, Sunday night. How many times did you sleep at your apartment? How many times did you sleep at your apartment? How many days? One?

Zero. Zero. Zero. Okay. And how many times did you sleep in your apartment? How many days? One? Zero. Zero. Okay. And how many times did you sleep in the Barstool office? Okay. The answer is two, folks. The answer is two.

I don't even want to go over this. The answer is two. But the last one was because I was working hard. And I had to sleep here because I was working until four in the morning. So that one checked out. The first one wasn't exactly the same scenario. What happened? You just thought it was a good idea to come sleep here?

I wish I knew. But I. You have roommates now, too, no? I know. Weren't they like come home with us? I think that I just because I don't think I brought keys out. And so I think I was just like. Stranded.

I need somewhere to sleep. Yeah. And then I guess I woke up here. But it was funny because my... Were you in the studio or were you in the office? I was in the green room. It was like, I had a fantastic night's sleep. I bet the green room was really quiet.

It's the place to sleep if you're going to sleep here. I've done it several times. Not after a night out. Well, actually, that's why. Don't tell Kelly Martin. She'll kill you. Don't tell anybody, a.k.a. don't tweet about it. Well, actually, that's a lie. Don't tell Kelly Martin. She'll kill you. I know. I'm like.

Don't tell anybody, a.k.a. Don't tweet about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I texted Jackie. I was like, you will be on the next episode of the Dayport. I didn't think about that. I didn't think about that. But, yeah, no, I woke up. And it was also funny because, like, I don't think I really fully remembered going there.

But, like, it was black. It was, like, all black. It was pitch black. And, like, my room was pitch black because, like, I don't have a window. And so for five minutes, I, like I thought that it was in my room, and then I woke up, and I was like, oh my god. Why am I in the office? What time did you wake up? It was like nine.

And that was Sunday morning? This was Saturday morning. All right. So nobody here? Nobody was here. No, thank god. That would have been so funny I also like how we've

um how you know thank god no one was here to see that and then Jackie delete that tweet to your

I don't know what 10,000 followers yeah yeah but we'll tell it on the podcast though yeah we'll tell it to a couple

hundred thousand people it might have been I did like a no comment sign and you guys made me do it lesson learned right lesson learned also you should learn your lesson and go to betterhelp.com last voicemail today is brought to you by BetterHelp

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Last voicemail. Let's go. What's up, KFC? I was just listening to your most recent podcast, and you guys were talking about sponsoring a chicken. I think that's hysterical. And I think I can help you. I got six chickens at my disposal that live in my house. They're all female, so they all lay eggs and stuff like that.

But, yeah, I think that'd be awesome and hysterical if you guys want to sponsor a chicken. So I got six. So let me know if you want one. Do you want to do the gerbil or the chicken or both? Okay, well, sponsor a chicken. What does sponsoring a chicken mean? We buy it and we, you know, raise it Okay, but how much is that going to cost us?

Because I'll do all six I think we can afford all six, right? I think we can afford all six Can Jackie take care of six chickens is the question Oh, oh, oh, no, he takes care of it Oh, you want to sponsor it like the same way my brother sponsored that Yeah, it's like the seal I own And also the tree I own and the rainforest

And the moon, the star I don't have a star exactly yes uh yeah i feel like this whole thing is like backfire like i sure did now i just put work like i yeah yeah but you got the whole time bad decision for you you guys also like it's a team effort no no it's your it's your it's your job you're the director of morale. You're supposed to be gassing us up. The way that you're going to gas us up is give me a chore? Yes. I think I need more work in my life. But then what's, like, so now I'm just, like, raising a gerbil on the side?

And six chickens. Yeah. I didn't hear the voice, though. Yeah, no, we're getting six chickens. We're getting six chickens we're getting six chickens six chickens and a gerbil you're telling me that can't be like an internet series called six chickens and a gerbil you see the new episode of six chickens and a gerbil

it's amazing by the way I think Henry would have loved it if a gerbil was running around oh sure and six chickens I mean I feel like this is this is Cramerica Industries in Seinfeld as far as I can like this is straight out of, this is Cramerica Industries in Seinfeld.

Like, as far as I can tell, this company is nothing more than a solitary man living in an apartment that may or may not contain a chicken. That's all we're doing here. Imagine if, like, the rest of our podcast had just been, like, there's a bunch of shit in the background. Like, did you get him to shut up, Jackie? Jesus, there's a fucking show going on here. Take care of your goddamn kids. I'm just picturing, you know chickens can fly for like two seconds, and Jackie's just

chasing them while they glide through the air. Feathers are going everywhere. The gerbil's getting attacked by the chickens. Morale's never been higher. They're all just pecking him apart. Jesus, Jackie! You're going to put him in my ass tonight!

You know shit's getting weird. You come in, Jackie's chasing around six chickens, but the gerbil's nowhere to be found. Uh-oh. We know where the gerbil is. Nick's kind of waddling after one chicken. Come to KFC Radio, man. We got a whole team now.

There's like six humans, six chickens, and a gerbil. Try and find it. That'd be a game. Everyone sits at a table. Then you gotta keep a straight face

and find out which person has a gerbil in their hands. Mike is squirming over there, bro. What did you do? Mike looks really uncomfortable today. That was just one episode. Everyone who works on this show now is sitting at this table quietly. Eventually someone's just like, God damn it!

He bit me! He bit me. He beat me. Goodness gracious. All right. Camille Kostic joins the program now. I mean, yeah, we're going to take you up on that offer for the chickens, bro. Camille Kostic's on the show. It's brought to you by 3G. Send us a price.

Let's negotiate. Call us back. We'll call him back live next time. Zero. You're donating the chickens to the show, dude. You buy 3G. Let's negotiate. Call us back. We'll call him back live next time. No, I mean, the price is zero. You're donating the chickens to the show, dude. No, I want to care for it. It's one of those things you got to buy it to value it. How much does it cost to raise a chicken?

Yeah. I'll pay for it. Nope, they don't eat eggs. They lay them. They eat that like seed. Yeah. Okay, how much for the dirt a chicken eats? It can't be much. It can't be much. It can't be much it can't be much i think i have

like 10 bucks in my pocket should cover the license lifespan three chi brings you today's interview if you were listening to today's episode on three chi you were having yourself a time now enjoy it responsibly and i don't just say that to be a nerd. I say that as the guy who overdid it. But, man, do I love 3G, man. Right now, I've been reading a lot. Not a lot, but recently. Excuse me? I've been reading, like, not, like, anything serious.

All, like, fiction books and beach reads and summer reads. How is this the first time I'm hearing of this? Because it's only been going on in, like, a couple weeks. You used to make fun of me for reading. Well, yeah, you're a nerd. Can I make a Beach Read recommendation real quick? Sure. 21 Truths About Love. I did it last summer, but it is...

It's really good. It's all written in lists. I'll just give it to you. Okay. But you don't have to buy it. But listener, I recommend it. Well, you know, we're in different things. I'm doing this sci-fi book right now that's coming out in...

That's right. You're a nerd. I'm not. I forgot. Right. You're just a pussy. You do romance novels. I'm doing this sci-fi book right now that's coming out. That's right. You're a nerd. I'm not. I forgot. Right. You're just a pussy. You do romance novels. I'm a nerd.

You're gay. That's what K-Serio should be. Brought to you by a nerd and a gay. I'm so mad at you, by the way. Why? If you were just actually gay,

we'd be rich. I know. Yeah, I know. No, you're like, for real. For fucking real. this is if this show was like a straight barstool bro and a straight gay guy and a gay barstool guy we would be getting 50 million dollar offers from spotify i agree and instead you eat pussy and we're poor you

fucking asshole just come out just do it come out come out i Just do it. Come out. Come out. I think you were the one who came out last episode. I know. I'm trying. What's that deal when you get over 30 and you just start loving cock? So maybe I'll come out.

Maybe I'll come out. I'll bet you Tommy Pham doesn't hit 300 this year. That's the new code for gay, you know? I'm such a Tommy fan, bro. Anyway, I love getting three cheat up. And so the book I'm reading is Foundation. It's going to be a new series on Apple TV in September. I think it's going to be, they're hoping it's going to be the next Game of Thrones. Although it's more, it's not like fantasy-ish.

It's more like space stuff. But Star Wars is based on this. This is like the OG sci-fi book. more it's it's not it's not like fantasy-ish it's more like space space space stuff but star wars is based on this this is like the og sci-fi star wars is based on a book i didn't think star well it's not like it's not like like you're not gonna find out like luke skywalker's in this book oh okay it's like that's where this that's where george lucas and everyone like got this like that's fine i get the inspiration framework i thought like but even that even that i thought that like that star wars was like the inspiration for everything. I think that's where it all began.

And it turns out it's Isaac Asimov and Foundation is the spot. So I'm reading that. I actually just started that. So I'm starting reading that. Give us the page number. Like four. Because sometimes the 3G puts me out.

I'm going to get 3G to read this book. So you take some Chi and you get bed, and you read a book? Yeah. God damn. I'm also doing a little bit of – Look at you growing up. Well, you know what happened? I started out – I was doing – I started going to the pool during the summer with kids and shit.

I was doing books on tape, audio, audible. And then I tried to do that. I go right the fuck to sleep. If I lay down, I'm like listening. See you later. So then I was like, all right, I'm going to get up. You lose the kids and it's an old thing. Then I was like, let me get the book,

and I realized it's not the form of which I'm consuming the book. It's the THC in my system. It's the rampant Delta-8 in my body. That's putting me to sleep because god do i love it though it's like you know you know some people like you take ambien you try to fight it they say it's like funny i've never done that i've never done it but i'm like i i get the i put it takes a three cheat i get my book out and i like the my joke to myself as i wake up in the morning i look what page i'm on i'm like i got like half a page further uh it's

but it's just so peaceful. I love it. And I've been a gummy guy, but recently I've been doing the vape pen. And the vape cartridges, they just work so fast. I mean, it's like I am stoned. Like it's one pull and I am high. It is amazing. If you don't know what 3G is, it's a THC extract, Delta 8, that gets you high and helps you deal with chronic pain and restlessness and anxiety.

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Let's talk to Camille Kostic on KFC Radio. There she is. Oh, nope, never mind. Hey, back. What's up, gorgeous? Is there even anything to talk about anymore with us I'm like I need to retire Wait no I have things to talk about

Where's our relationship stand right now you and I Wow Are we still engaged Are we like on right now Oh hi Where's our relationship Are we still engaged The longest engagement of all

time we're going like five years no no we'll get i'll get your real ring soon that's okay that we're supposed to get like married like that's usually how it works it just feels good right here yeah no i like that i agree with you that's what that's what engaged couples say when they're doubting it. No, we're just good right now. I don't need a piece of paper to show my love. We don't need a whole thing. We're just engaged. We're good.

I got it. I understand. We should go back to that spot and have a breakup video. Throw a drink in his face. Are you in a relationship? Why do I feel like you are? You're right. Yeah, with you.

He's cheating on you. No, you're right. Yeah, with you. He's cheating on you. No, no, no. It's with you. You have a serious relationship, right? Yeah, every time I talk about my girlfriend on the podcast, I'm talking about you. That would be a funny little revelation. Just a four-year bit. He's like, yeah.

Yeah, you. Yeah, she's in Sports Illustrated. It's awesome. It's straight up like my real girlfriend. This is like when you're lying in seventh grade about who your girlfriend is. She's not from here. It's long distance. She's in Sports Illustrated.

That makes sense why my magazine sits there. I never want to break up because I really love. I'm always in the episodes even when I'm not there. You're in literally every single episode. Honestly, one day we should. I mean, I do love it as a little accent piece. Why didn't you scream it? Oh yeah, that's new.

Listen, girl, we got the, you know, you guys are engaged. Actually, this was my engagement present to you guys. I got it framed. But I think one day we should stage like a dramatic breakup where you're like, ah, you smash this and throw it across the room all dramatic. And then that woman who was there filming our engagement she just happens to be there again

and she's like oh my god this is a mess this time says ksc radio one of my first stops uh since finding out i got this cover baby that was a moment that was a hell of a moment for you you look uh you look pretty good i'd say pretty decent pretty decent on the cover here how about you in this like uh suit jacket here? You're looking more professional. I mean, you guys. Of course, I'm wearing blue bra top underneath. There you go. I mean, you've got a lot cooking right now.

You've got your own line of this, your own line of that. I mean, you can be like Camille head to toe now, right? Yeah, what aren't you doing right now? I don't know. A lot of things. I don't have a podcast. That's why I come on yours all the time. That was.

Don't, don't do it. That seemed insulting, in fact. I don't know. I'm in the new Ryan Reynolds movie, but I guess I don't have a podcast. I don't do your dumb shit. I always do your podcast. I'm literally going to be 95. Hopefully still in Sports Illustrated.

What do we have to talk about? No, but it is true. There are people who like you. We do so many interviews where people are promoting a certain thing or whatever. But then there are people who are just like, yeah, pencil it in no matter what. I don't care what's going on or what's not going on. We're going to chop it up. I feel like I almost feel weird coming on.

Like if I do something, I think I remember talking to you guys and then also with the chicks. And I think I was going on to talk about like season two of Wipeout or something. It felt weird. I was like, oh, yeah, we're here to talk about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's a business side of this. Right.

Wouldn't that be weird if your conversations in real life with your friends were almost like all podcast interviews? Because we were just friends talking, but then at the end you have to be like, let me tell you what I'm doing. At the end of every conversation, your friend was like, well, I got a business call at 9, and I'll see you on this trip at 10. The other day, because I'm in New York City right now. It kind of stinks that we're not. What the fuck? Why didn't you come over? I didn't know it was allowed.

What are you talking about? Yeah. We stopped doing anything about a year ago now. Yeah, we are back in action. Wait, so you're just in a hotel room in New York City right now? What relatively part of town? Rob and I got an apartment here. Oh, you motherfuckers.

So you just like kind of live here now? Yeah, very, very recently. But yeah, so, but I will say, I didn't know I was going to be here to the last second. So I'm really like in and out. Shit. Yeah, well, listen, next time you can come through, we're back in action.

I mean, I will say I'm really enjoying being like barefoot and sitting crisscross applesauce. You can do that too. I'll fucking take my pants off right now. We can just hang out. Like this place is, there are no rules here. I'm actually wearing shoes today that are way too small. I'm taking them off right now. I'm doing it. Do it. Done. Shoes off, Camille.

Why are you wearing shoes that are too small? John sometimes wears a pair of boxers. This is a specific pair of underwear. They are a size small, Camille. Wait, what? Yeah, exactly. So I forget that things come in sizes sometimes, and I have

multiple, on multiple occasions, I have bought packs of underwear just in the front. I just grabbed the first ones I saw, because why not? And it turns out in the front, I keep the smalls. In the back's where the larges are. But that's fine. Okay. You do that, and that and you're like shit that was stupid of me let me throw these out or give them to someone who's small john just continues to wear them we're all the time he's like six two three hundred pounds it's crazy what size are you wearing right now right now of underwear look that that'll be our our title like talking underwear with real costume yeah

it would be very disappointing it's mine um so sports illustrated i mean i really do have to ask like wait which of your million things are we really talking about today because you do have so many things so many so many business and adventures the magazine launched today and i haven't even seen the magazine yet i don't even know what photos are in the magazine so i'm here talking about it and i'm like dying to catch a break so i can go run out and get one to go figure out i'm where i would guess they're pretty okay. I wouldn't worry. What is in the world right now? Where was your shoot this time?

I remember the first time we talked and you were, it was the first time you were in the magazine. It wasn't, I was not your cover time. And you were like, you guys know how it is when you're like topless in Bali. And we're like, no,

we have no idea what that's like. Absolutely not. Where were you this time? I was in Belize, but that time. Oh, Belize, my bad. Yeah, and then I was in Australia, then the Dominican. And this year, we did it domestic. So I was in Miami Beach.

I do know what it's like to be topless there. That one I can relate to. Do you prefer, is it nice to to be topless there that one I can relate to do you prefer is it nice to like not have to fly like around the world or do you actually like getting out there oh my god I mean going on an international trip even if it's for two days and I remember

when I went to Australia where that cover was shot I remember traveling for like 30 hours and I think I was in Australia for 30 hours and then back on the flight to Quebec it was the most epic like one of the most epic trips of my life but um I have to tell you I was so happy that they didn't take a hiatus this year because of everything in 2020 and that they figured out a way to shoot um but doing it's a much different situation when you're in belize on a private island topless

and you're in miami beach topless i didn't think of that yeah and there's the general public and i'm like what's happening how so what is how does that work do you just like take the picture you know hold them up like take the picture come back up them the whole time so you know you i'm i love that we're saying them like the girls comfortable around the team so when you're facing the camera crew and everybody that you like you know and love and has been shooting with you over the years like i you get really comfortable so we actually had to put like little pasties on i'm used to just you know let it just free the nip yeah let them go yeah so i was getting a little comfortable when you're getting in the zone i'm practicing in my blazer you're getting in zone

in between takes or when you want to be in position let go and then you start again there was no letting go so it was like juggling it was very do you ever is there ever like a new hire or something where you're like, oh shit. Like, you know, you have a crew of 10 and then all of a sudden there's like an 11th and now you're like, well, wait a minute. I think that's the, that's, I wouldn't say it's a problem to some people. It is. I'm so comfortable that sometimes even if I, I don't even know if I have like a quick

change somewhere in front of like strangers or something, I will undress. And they're like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I'm like, what are you sorry for? I'm sorry I offended you. Listen, I don't think anybody should be apologizing. I think it's a pretty, you know, if you're comfortable, it's a win-win. I think everybody's all good with that. That happens to me on the subway all the time.

I take my pants off. People are like, I'm sorry. No, no time i take my pants off but you're like i'm sorry no no i took my pants off it's you're good now wait hang on i just saw as i was looking up uh the pictures for this year i'm seeing megan the stallion in this issue that is everyone else dude it's a real hot girl summer. Yeah, for real. This is... Yeah, I'm looking at the SI Swimsuit IG, and it says that they did a sit-down with her,

so you can catch that. I still haven't had a look at everything, so... She's a baddie. She's a baddie. Do you ever interact with the other models, or is it like you do yours, they do theirs, and everyone just... I mean, I've seen group shots, but is it for the most part you're solo or for the most part you're all together? Yeah. For the most part you're solo. So when someone's

flying in, um, and shooting the other person is, or you're shooting, someone's flying in and getting ready. And then when you leave, they go into the fitting room and they get ready for their shoot. So it's really like in passing, a lot of the times you don't even realize i didn't even know all the other models that shot in miami even though we were all in the same hotel but it was just like done you're out so um there's a couple girls i saw in passing i remember actually i was passing olivia colpo when she came into australia and i was leaving and i was like dang i wish we could like both be here together and chill but good job get out yeah she's in the comments of this all the look at all these blue checks.

So this is Megan's picture, and it's like, it's Olivia Culpo and Kristen Harper. Everyone's like, oh, my God, I'm freaking out. Slay queen. Yes, queen. All that shit. I'm loving this. It is funny to see that, like, you're all, you can be on the goddamn cover, and you're still, like, fangirling over someone else being on the cover, you know?

Yeah, it's unbelievable. We all all are like who is the cover no one knows we all find out when everybody else does and like i said there's people are seeing my images before i'm even seeing you know what they should do one year is like rock paper scissors between two chicks for the cover that would be unbelievable i would watch that shit wait you just said do you have no input in it in any of your pictures none wait wait uh like nobody or like you know like fucking giselle says she's not doing something she's not doing something right i mean i'm not her so uh but i'd be like this is like you're what third or fourth i was gonna say you should have some well let me talk to your agent i got we got uh you know let me represent you when we when we do the i will say this year and and i think last year when we do the fittings i remember

just going in and be like put me in you know whatever you want like yeah i was happy to be there but yeah and now but now that i like know my body type and i know like what's flattering to my figure and and stuff like that um it's cool. MJ will be like, pull out some of your favorites. It's cool in that. It's nuts to me that MJ is like, she might be the more dominant MJ. Like the moment you said MJ, I knew exactly who you were talking about. Right. And the fact that we know like a photographer, I mean, she, you know, Michael Jordan is second when it comes to dominating your field.

And Michael Jackson's not even in the conversation. Forget about it. Shit, that's awesome. When I say MJ and Barstool Sports, you guys are probably thinking about the athlete. No, not anymore. Swear to God, I'm not. Swear to God, I'm not. When I first, like, found out not even who she was, I just, like, found her Instagram.

And I was kind of just like, at first, I didn't if it was a guy or a girl. Cause she was taking pictures. And I was just like, who is this lucky, lucky person? What a job. It's that's so, that's so interesting because I still don't know what she looks like. Yeah.

Images. She's there. I think she, she's in some of the photos that she uploaded recently. She's, would you know her by sight? I wouldn't know her by sight. I have seen her. I Would you know her by sight? I wouldn't know her by sight. I have seen her.

I wouldn't know her by sight, but I have seen her. MJ Day, right? Yeah. Yeah, like, I mean, I'm looking at her now, but if she had walked in, I wouldn't be like. Gorgeous. I mean, and she just. Oh, look, there you are specifically with her.

It's a shot of you two. No, that's not me. That's not her. Oh, well, it's a shot of you two no that's not me that's not her oh well it's on her instagram see what i'm telling you i don't know who she is it's just wild but i almost feel like i have to like like pay respect to her because i feel like growing up as a guy uh and even still now as an adult it's's like Sports Illustrated and Victoria's Secret are the end-all be-all of modeling in my mind.

If you contribute to that, then I thank you. It's what made me come out as straight. You came out as a straight guy? The Tyra Banks issue. I remember seeing that and going, oh, that's what I like. Oh, and you came out as multicultural as well. Yeah.

You didn't discriminate at all. I have a question about the shoots. I remember seeing a Chrissy Teigen tweet long ago where she was talking about how often people drink on shoots because it dehydrates you. Do people drink a lot of white wine on shoots? Oh, I thought you meant drink water no no she's she said that like everyone drinks white wine all the time oh i her shoot must have had a different environment because it's chrissy or something because well i was gonna say yeah usually on my shoot so we're drinking like coolers and coolers of water actually i actually can't believe how

long i can go without eating and drinking on set because when i'm in the zone like i i that's i'm like oh wow like a lot of hours have passed by or the biggest time to break for lunch and i'm like i want to keep going because when you're just there you just want you're just you're in that moment you just want to keep going you're in the zone so yeah i feel like chrissy was letting it rip yeah i was gonna say she must have had like a special request or something because I've never seen. I forget. It was one tweet. I forget exactly what she was describing, but she definitely talked about models drinking white wine.

How about this? Is pepperoni, is that universal or is that hers? What? That's what the photographer says if your nipple's showing. Pepper. I was going to say, I know what pepperoni means in the modeling world but i don't know what you're talking about was it true you were talking about like that people are eating pepperonis on set um yeah i know what that means that's

that's universal yeah but i don't like it i don't so wait wait wait hang explain to me they just shower it out if your nipples are showing like pepperoni camille sometimes i think it's just so funny why can't you just say hey your nipples out yeah is that is that do they like whisper to you like pepperoni no i don't know sometimes like sometimes i haven't heard someone say that to me a long time because i think if they said that they'd be like can we have another name for it can you just tell me my that is what would you prefer okay okay let's come up with with the code word for you if it's not going to be pepperoni and you can't just be literal about it what would you prefer okay okay let's come up with with the code word for you if it's not gonna be pepperoni and you can't just be literal about it what would you rather something better than a sweaty italian yeah salami we got a mortadella showing what would be your code

word for nibs i don't know what's like we used to come up with like a cute one. Okay. Like, like, I don't know. Are we going to describe it literally? Are we going to say it's like a little pop out? Mini mountain. Mini mountain. Mini mountain. Sounds like something from Candyland. This is awesome.

Nevermind. We win. Gumdrops. How about that? Ooh, I like gumdrops. I like that. Gumdrops is cute cute you can say any candy

you can be lollipops your lollipops are showing but they're gum drop ass yeah right they could be a lollipop ass too gum drop and i and i and i think it's uh you know it's all it's about the delivery too you know like hey gum drop yeah you can't be like pepperonis your ronies are out girl we're gonna revolutionize the modeling industry yeah have mj leave our stamp on it yeah we'll be the guys how about we'll be the designated nipple watchers to just be like yep if we can apply for that job i'm in i don't hope this but i kind of hope that there's a behind-the-scenes footage that will happen in the next shoot. And I have a slip, and it's on camera. And the photographer says, you're gumdrops.

I think you and the rest of the world want that to happen, too. Gumdrops. How about this? Can you, next time you're on set, why don't you say that? Why don't you tell your photographer, if there's a wardrobe malfunction, just say gumdrops and we're going to start this movement. There's no pepperonis when I'm on set. Gumdrops.

And then I feel like one day you can write like an autobiography or something and you're going to call it gumdrops. Gumdrops. And then it'll be a cute little like anecdote when you're doing the book tour. So why gumdrops? Well, me and my fiance we had this code word for when my nipples are out. Podcasts are fun because you can literally go off about a nothing.

Anything and nothing. Camille, it's the only reason I have a job. Yeah. Just talking about nonsense. If there was rules to it and structure that you had had to follow we would have been cooked a long especially specifically this show like we don't have any rules this is episode 100 000 with neil kostick titled gumdrops yes i love it i absolutely love it uh what what uh so yeah the ryan rey What, what, so yeah, the Ryan Reynolds movie? What's the, yeah.

Are you guys going to go see it? Yes! I mean, as a matter of fact, I'm going to call that the Camille Kostick movie that Ryan Reynolds makes an appearance in. Okay, no. I'm not upset about it. How much interaction did you get with him? If any, because I know sometimes these things are like, you know,

All the days that I was on set, he was always there because he was always in there but what was cool is he he was giving a lot of direction as well so it's it's pretty sweet too because i think i love acting a lot right now because it's something that's such a challenge for me and all the things that i do i'm designing swimsuits is also a challenge but i'm finding that memorizing the lines and not getting to really improv like i do with Wipeout where, you know, it's unscripted. It's not even just memorizing the lines. It's what is your facial expression? What is your body language? You really can't go off script that much until like, once you get it down, maybe they'll allow you. But it was such a huge learning experience for me. So I was so nervous and I kind of like being in that state. I'm not,

I'm almost like very uncomfortable but comfortable with being uncomfortable if that makes sense like i was like this is really cool i'm pushing myself to like a new level and having ryan there be like okay now do it this way now do it this way i love it that way like getting that reassurance from someone who's so legendary it was it was it was cool and actually we did a um there was a private screening in Boston a couple weeks ago. And Rob and I won't be able to go to the theaters together because he'll be in, like, football mode. And I go out to shoot Wipeout next month when the movie comes out. So when we found out that we were going to be able to go to this private screening the other week, I was like, this is amazing to get to watch the movie together.

So when we went there, Ryan was there. And the two of them met for the first time. And it was just, I knew the night was going to be special but i wasn't expecting this moment to happen that i'll never forget when they you know shook hands met for the first time and then to be standing next to these two men and him be like put his hand on my shoulder and be like she's really great it was awesome and i was like whoa that was awesome. And I was like, whoa, that was cool. You know, I was like a little kid in that moment. You know, that's amazing.

For Rob about being in a film because I'm I'm not in films like that. So. Oh, wait, are we are we going to be are we a film girl? Are we calling movies films now all the time? Film, film, film, film, film. Like proper lingo. Yeah, no, it's movies. You do film sometimes, too, right? I say film. I don't have proper lingo for anything. Yeah, no, it's movies. You do film sometimes too, right?

I say film. I say film, yeah. When you're trying to be, when you're trying to talk about it. No, I say film for like cinema. Like Fast and Furious is a film. No, no. No, Fast and Furious is a movie, not a film. What's the difference?

Well, film to me feels like when you're trying to be like, I was in a film. I won the Oscar because I'm in a film. Oh, okay. I'm just being manly,'m just being a man yes that's a difference um don't be late to the movie because i'm in the opening scene oh wow lead off let's go i just i'm the person who sometimes shows up late so i'm just telling other people no i'm there because i i'm i'm seeing all the the previews i'm doing all that shit it's like impossible to be late to a movie now anyway though because there are 20 minutes of previews yeah and they're all awesome i love i'm not complaining about that i love them yeah i've been waiting for the movies to open so i feel like it's like a thing to do like you're gonna be it's time to go to movies it's five o'clock you know seven o'clock movie like just

what's your movie what's your movie order? Snack order. What do you mean? Like when you go to the movies, do you get snacks to eat? Oh, of course. What's your go-to order? I get the big jumbo popcorn, extra butter, pump it on top. Do you ever do the straw?

You put the straw underneath the butter dispenser, and then you put the straw put the straw underneath the like butter dispenser and then you put the straw into your popcorn bucket so instead of just getting the top you get like into the bottom of the popcorn with the butter it's revolutionary i don't know why it could be caught no you're allowed to do it come on you get a little messy you gotta be ready for it but but you get that butter all in the middle okay so you get the jumbo popcorn. And then you always have to get a chocolate and a sweet,

so I'll get like the Swedish fish and like an M&M or something. See, we go, how about, what do you think about Bunch O' Crunch? The Nestle's Bunch O' Crunch. You put that into the popcorn. I don't do that.

I don't put the chocolate in the popcorn. I don't put it in either because it melts the chocolate. You don't have to put it in but you do the bite you eat the popcorn you eat the bunch of crunch okay i like that i like that and what's your drink i've heard of that um i get a water and a lemonade oh a lemonade that's an interesting so wait where you're rolling in you're getting a tub of popcorn, Swedish fish, M&M's, water, and a lemonade. That's awesome. That's why we're engaged

right there. Yeah, that's love. I can't even imagine what your side piece, Rob, when you're out cheating on John, when you're out with Rob, you get all that shit. I can't even imagine when he's rolling. You guys probably have a fucking Thanksgiving feast. It's not what you think.

It's the opposite. It's the, and I know he's not the only man out there. So women speak up. This is what happens. I don't want anything. Just get me a water. Cause he's trying to be healthy.

Like no movies you enjoy, but then he eats everything of mine. And I like, I don't share like that. I'll share the popcorn. I'll share the popcorn. Yeah. But I will not. I'm going to be one pack of swedish fish get your own that's funny that is reversed though it's usually yeah i could see every time he's always finish it i'm like it's not about not

finishing it's about letting me have my moment to just enjoy all of it before it's gone and then you can have it i feel like there's some deeper meaning here i mean you've had your time okay now it's my time and it's my sweetest fish leave me alone i've worked for 10 months for a bikini like now i get to have a sweetest fish leave me the fuck alone yeah is there do you have a moment like that after you shoot where you're like you don't have to worry about anything for a little while and you just go nuts listen i'm like not really into that like diet culture so whenever i talk about like i'd have cheat meals after shoots for

sure like i'm not eating penne alabaca the night before i'm sure going to oh yeah i'm eating it after but i just like i like i love eating clean i love eating healthy i do love if it's someone's birthday if it's christmas if it's i'm eating all the cookies i mean all the carvel ice cream cake i'm i'm enjoying it if you're gonna do it enjoy it don't complain about it's, I mean, and all the cookies, I mean, all the Carvel ice cream cake, I'm, I'm enjoying it. If you're going to do it, enjoy it. Don't complain about it. Have to do that. But, um, but my, I love Penne a la vodka and yeah, I just, that's my cheat meal.

I grab my girls. We go out the bread, all the bread and oil. I like how when you describe like holidays and cheat meals, it's just like a Tuesday for me. That's breakfast. I'm having a penny alabaga for breakfast. I have, okay, is this disgusting? In my sheets in my bed, I have, there are pockets on them, which are like, I don't know how that, they have like pockets. Like along the side of the bed, he has like little pouches, if you will.

And I fill him with candy. Oh. She puts her chin in her hand. Oh, okay. No, I honestly was just admiring my fiancé's face after he said that. He was like, and I have candy in there, and I put my hands in a pocket.

Aw, that's so cute. She loves it. Are you going to sleep over i'll fill your side too don't worry about it i'll get you a bunch of swedish fish what what would be your um last meal last supper you're death row, you get one more meal. You get an appetizer, an entree, and a dessert, and a drink. Okay. The appetizer would be probably like a big bowl of guac and chips, and that has to be perfect ratio.

Like, let every dip, let there be a chip. Then I would have penne alla vodka for the entree, and then for dessert, I would have a full Carvel ice cream cake to my face. What's your drink? Um... And I'll give you like a, you can have like a wine, if you will. You get like a soft drink and like an alcoholic drink if you want it. Um, um, um, um, um, um, um.

I'm a weirdo when I eat ice cream. I love to drink water. So I definitely need water on deck. But, ah. Would you do the lemonade? I do a po when I eat ice cream. I love to drink water, so I definitely need water on deck. Would you do lemonade? I'd do a pina colada. Wow, I did not see that coming. Penne vodka with your pina colada.

Wow. That is something. Amazing. I love it. All right, well, we we're gonna let you go because you got plenty else to do but we've got you know the jewelry we've got the swimsuits the swimsuit issues out wipe out the movie free guy that's my birthday by the way if you want to wish me a happy birthday when it comes out that's okay friday the 13th no it's actually august 14th i lied but it's the same same weekend the Opening weekend. What are you doing to celebrate?

I am actually going on a bachelor party that weekend. I'm very selfless of me to allow them to have a bachelor party on my birthday weekend. I guess you're not throwing a birthday party for your fiance. Interesting. Really interesting. So it turns out you don't have any plans. Good. Alright, love. Thank you so much as always

I love talking with you guys thanks guys bye if you just watched this video subscribe because subscribing is the only thing that keeps us employed here because if we don't work here we're going to have to be cold callers dealing with fucking or chicken

or a chicken coop razor a chicken razor a chicken farmer i think we just go farmers what they call them farmers yeah chicken farmers i don't want to be a farmer and i don't want to be a cold caller so make sure you subscribe to the video comment below what should we name all six of our chickens that jackie's going to be taking care of and how much do we think they cost because we're going to get to the bottom of that take a guess how much a chicken costs he's got to to pay for it, which sucks for her. Subscribe. Leave a comment. សូវាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប� Thank you.