KFC Radio - We've Decided That The Bear Sucks - Full Episode

Episode Date: July 18, 2023

Timecodes: 0:00 Start 10:04 Barstool Weekend Twitter Roundup 41:07 Monkey Boy is gonna win Oscars 43:15 Barbie x Oppenheimer x Out of Order 58:18 Dave Portnoy look-alike from live show ... 01:03:47 The best pair of t*ts we've ever seen 01:16:22 Adam 22 and Lena the Plug 01:24:08 Black and Blue / Gold and White dress guy attempted m*rder 01:25:34 Gang Gang Popcorn Live Stream Girls 01:34:51 Bobbi Althoff's interview with Drake 01:42:43 MMA chick who flashed her t*ts 01:46:09 The Hobby Horse championship 01:50:09 Barstool DVR 02:24:29 Video Voicemails +++++++++++++++++++++++ Gametime: Download the Gametime app or go to https://gametime.co, enter your email, and redeem code KFC for $20 off your first purchase (terms apply). Pirate Water: Go to drink piratewater.com to find pirate water in a location near you or order on gopuff HelloFresh: Go to https://HelloFresh.com/kfc50 and and use code plan50 for 50% off plus free shipping!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/kfcr

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey KFC Radio listeners, you can find every episode of KFC Radio on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, alright, bro. My entire political world just got flipped over. It's another edition of KFC Radio on the Barstool Sports Network. I... I got bad news for everybody today. Oh.
Starting point is 00:00:28 I'm in a great mood. Well, let's see if we can take that down. When I'm in a great mood, it's bad news for everybody. When I'm in a bad mood, I'm quiet, and I just kind of go about my mood. Yeah, when you're in a good mood, you don't shut the fuck up. When I'm in a good mood, it's... This could be a four-hour episode, Jackie. Set your alarms!
Starting point is 00:00:46 Well, I mean, I don't think this will tear you down. It should. It would tear down a normal human, but it won't tear you down. But you're just about the dumbest motherfucker I've ever met in my life. Why? Oh. Oreo 55 strikes again. First of all.
Starting point is 00:01:01 I feel like for the most part. I think I can explain myself well here. Oh. I mean, you're going to say that you thought it was defensive back, which is not like totally retarded. But it's pretty fucking stupid in the grand scheme of things. Well, here's the deal. First of all, if you look at the time on that, it's 12 minutes. That's pretty good for the fucking New York Times crossword puzzle.
Starting point is 00:01:21 Oreo 55 is John's crossword puzzle alias. 13 minutes. And he has been trying to become a crossword puzzle guy because of the daily mini. This isn't the mini. This is a crossword. 12 minutes on a full crossword. Not so bad. That's the full?
Starting point is 00:01:37 Yeah. No, it's small. That's the full? At night, I'll go back and do archives. So it's a Monday full. So that's towards the easier scale they were like bigger that's uh i think they get bigger it's like sunday's a little tighter but like monday's is an easier one um but that's a full well oreo 55 is john he's known for doing like five minute minis when other people do it in like five seconds.
Starting point is 00:02:12 And he had, I guess he had one word left with only one letter missing, and it was Arizona athlete for short. And he had D, B, A, blank, and K. Now, to be clear, when I tweeted this, I knew it was D-back. I knew it was grosser across. But you knew it because of the other word. Yes. So, like, the C, the missing C, he knew because the across word, the puzzle, the clue was food purveyor is a grosser. So he never figured out that Arizona athlete for sure is D-back. Not only did he not figure it out, he decided
Starting point is 00:02:47 enough people in the world and involved in the crossword community, enough people will be just as confused as I am to tweet this out incredulously and to pose to the general public, what could I possibly be missing here?
Starting point is 00:03:12 When I don't... Mind you, I didn't shoot from the hip. I stared at the thing before hitting send. I was like, how is this going to make me look dumb? I went through everything possible. And people say you work for a sports.
Starting point is 00:03:27 Oh, suck my cunt. But, okay, listen. I was going to say, we are not by any means sports experts. You know, just watch our dozen challenges or dozen matches where it's like we answer all of the, like, girl questions and we call all of the men on the sports questions. However, that being said. Bro, pretending to be a sports guy, I stopped doing that five years ago. Facts understood with you there. I like sports.
Starting point is 00:03:55 Pretending to be the all-time sports guy, I stopped doing that. Pretending that knowing D-backs is a sports guy level thing is fucking insane. Okay, so now let me explain myself a little bit. Because sometimes your brain gets in something where like, it's just a dozen brain waves. Actually, when I do the dozen, I have a problem with that, where it's like an answer box
Starting point is 00:04:18 in my head and I can't stop thinking about that. So the first word I got in this kind of area was eyed across. Therefore, my first letter in D-backs was D. But Arizona athlete for short, my brain first went devil, Sun Devils. So I was thinking college. This guy is so not a sports guy.
Starting point is 00:04:44 He doesn't know Diamondbacks, but he knows that the fucking ASU mascot is the devil, the Sun Devils. So I was thinking. If you know the Arizona State mascot is the Sun Devils, then you know the Arizona Dynamics. I obviously know them. I swear to God, the fucking Venn diagram of those two things are completely one circle. So I was just thinking college sports, college sports, college sports, because I was thinking college sports, college sports, college sports.
Starting point is 00:05:01 I was in football mode. So then I went to D-back, and I was like, I just can't think of anything else. And not for nothing. You guys are National League guys, so I guess you think about it a little more. No one gives a fuck. The Arizona Diamondbacks are known for one thing and one thing only, not giving New Yorkers any joy in 2001.
Starting point is 00:05:19 That's it. Dude, like no one. The Arizona Diamondbacks have that, and Randy Johnson hit a seagull with a fastball. What the fuck else have the Arizona Diamondbacks done that I should know their name? Dude, the D-backs. This guy was sitting here thinking Sun Devils and defensive backs. I think I would have gotten that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:05:36 That's how bad that is. But again, it's not even about not getting it. It's the tweet. Like people – did you expect an answer or did you expect people being like yeah what the fuck is that i was it's funny when i tweet questions i'm not even gonna look at the mention yeah yeah you can't even look at answers yeah i'm not gonna look i don't fucking care i'm just i'm just like it's just like i'm laying in bed i got no one else to talk to i scrolled your replies i'm back on twitter by the way i scrolled your replies. I'm back on Twitter, by the way.
Starting point is 00:06:05 I scrolled your replies to see if I missed something about the tweet. I was like, oh, this is like, I don't know, from a show or like this is a meme, a reference. And people just being like, this can't be real. This can't be real, right? Bro, I mean, I'm not going to defend it. Once I saw Diamondbacks, I was like, oh, yeah, you idiot. But the way your brain works when you're doing that kind of stuff, I was stuck in this circle.
Starting point is 00:06:32 It's the way your brain works when you're a dumb person. That's it. Smart people's brains can change and pivot. I even got to – once I got in college mode, I couldn't get out of football, because then I got DB, and I was like, alright, it's D-back, and I was thinking, I was like, how is that, like, Arizona
Starting point is 00:06:51 Cardinals, Coyotes, like, what the fuck is a D-back? Did you ever say Diamondback in your head? Never. Not until I saw it. That's crazy. You ran through the Sun Devils and defensive backs, but one of the major sports. I couldn't think of the football team's name. I was like. That's crazy. You ran through the Sun Devils and defensive backs, but one of the major sports. I couldn't think of the football team's name.
Starting point is 00:07:07 I was like, what's the football team? It's not a snake. I was like, Yotes. I couldn't get it. I have no defense. I will tell you why there's somewhat of a defense. I just did this with the Mets podcast. We did the Mets suck, so we did the the uh the mets suck so we
Starting point is 00:07:26 do the immaculate grid every episode just to kill time because there's nothing to fucking talk about and i was just like i these things are no longer in my brain yeah name a person who played for the the rangers and the nationals i have no fucking clue no i i see people tweet obviously the immaculate grid a lot. I have. Name somebody who plays for the Dodgers and the Nationals. Like a very obvious, like recent answer, Trey Turner. Not even close to being in my brain. Not even close to being in my brain.
Starting point is 00:08:03 And I really, I think part of, you know, the tale of Barstool is the timing of it all. When you start blogging and doing this shit when you're in your 20s, you know all this. You either gamble or play fantasy sports or just watch and consume every sport. You know the names. You know the prospects. You watch the drafts. You just know it all. And then you get older and stuff just falls out of your brain new stuff comes in
Starting point is 00:08:27 new responsibilities new worries you get depressed you have anxiety and you forget about who played for the fucking texas rangers for 50 years i i used to do it with like my friend's dad in high school we're like he we would just like just list batting averages. It's just gone. That's not what I do anymore. And the worst thing is, gun to my head, that doesn't change anything. Like if there was a dozen question, I remember that was just like, these two National League teams, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, fuck, okay, how can I go about this?
Starting point is 00:09:02 And I was like, all right, I know who's in the East. I know who's in the Central. i know who's in the central i know who's in the west let me i know who's in each division let me go through and i had like a logical way to find the answer if the question is just like something to do with players on the texas rangers my brain just like sees their logo and that's it you know like it just i can't even begin to start to check in the files in my brain to find players it's just like nothing you don't know that's really what my brain's saying you don't know you don't know you don't know you don't know this you don't know you're not gonna get this you're not gonna get this just say you don't know just just check out just give up you know you know it's just like my brain
Starting point is 00:09:34 won't even try to think of the answer yeah let's tap out bitch you're fucking dumb but i but but But I – but Oreo 55, not knowing D-backs. Honestly, aside from that, which I got it. I got it. But you didn't. You got Grozer. You didn't get it. You got Grozer. That's how you get so crossword.
Starting point is 00:09:54 I finished the crossword. You finished the crossword puzzle. You did not get that answer. Let's call it 1250. I finished it. That's a good time for a full crossword. That I don't know. Maybe true.
Starting point is 00:10:04 Maybe not. I'm not Oreo 56. I don't know. Clemmer's tweet though. I'm sending this to the crossword crew. The crossword crew is very funny. Okay, actually we're going to do something new real quick. We're going to start something called the Barstool
Starting point is 00:10:20 Weekend Twitter Roundup. Flows right off the top. Because every week now there's just enough people and enough stuff that happens from like Friday through Monday that's either important or you know
Starting point is 00:10:36 controversial or just flat out stupid and you want to gossip about it and make fun of the dumb people you work with. So we are going to do a little roundup for all of the things that happen on Twitter in the Barstool world that weekend. And we have to begin with the Fasoli text. This text.
Starting point is 00:11:00 This text was not sent, correct? Because if you look at the bottom text, it's kind of like, that's what I want to say, right? Which almost makes it worse in my mind. Oh, I didn't catch that part. Open up Fasoli's answer and look at the bottom. That's what I want to say. Dad, she's all over LinkedIn.
Starting point is 00:11:17 I think he sent this to his dad and said, like, should I send this? Which makes it maybe even worse to me. Right? That's what I want to say is the next text, and then dad she's all over LinkedIn I don't know if it's only well enough this is all I know about Fasoli that's it that's just a Viva tattoo yes yes he's like don't say it he's all he's all there he said it he said it right because like i'll be honest when i read this tweet i almost didn't read the second screenshot of this because i read the first one and i was like ah it's kind of lame like i didn't think it was a good prank
Starting point is 00:11:57 i thought like it's too over the top i thought you gave it away i thought i thought you fucking gave it away right so wait so go back in case people are listening. I suggest you go over to the YouTube and subscribe and watch it. But so somebody pranked Fasoli, who is a cameraman here, stool scenes and everything else. Can you go back to the other? And he is a true diehard stoolie who ended up getting a job here. He has a Viva tattoo on his thigh. Very prominent.
Starting point is 00:12:30 Works hard. Loves the company. Loves everybody here. But smiles when he's not finding it. His eyes closed. And is always just kind of like, you know, getting bullied. We're just bullying him. And somebody – was it Donnie or just someone else?
Starting point is 00:12:46 Like Donnie – I think Donnie had his friend do it. Okay. So Donnie's friend – that's a little weird too to be like, buddy, I need you for a minute. We're going to fuck with this cameraman I work with. So they texted him and said, hey, Nick. That's Nick Fasoli. This is blah, blah, blah with the Cape Cod's Times.
Starting point is 00:13:07 We're doing a piece on the downfall of hometown heroes. Spelled wrong. We already, I mean, already off the bat. It's like, what? Yeah. We wanted to see if we could interview you for the article. Like, right away, in his brain, he's got to be going, I'm a hero, and I had a downfall.
Starting point is 00:13:28 The downfall is the craziest part. In some backwards world, maybe you're from the smallest town in the world and maybe this is like something heroic. By the way, Bournemouth, I mean it's a small – Yeah, Cape Cod. It's a Cape Cod town. I feel like there's probably like billionaires who live in Cape Cod. I don't... I wouldn't think of...
Starting point is 00:13:49 I'm getting ahead of myself here because then Fasoli has like a thing. And maybe he knows Bourne better than I do. But more important than that is like going through your brain being like, what was my downfall? You know what I mean? Like there's no fucking... Head back to the... Yeah, Taylor Swift's on the Cape all the time. The Kennedys. There's some other people on's no fucking head back to the tail yeah taylor swift's
Starting point is 00:14:05 on the cape all the time the kennedys you know there's there's some other people from the cape go back to the uh text so uh we were thinking of starting with your thriving career at a valet at the famed lobster trap and run through the events that led to you being a failed drone pilot i don't even quite know what that means i'm sure he's trying to do some drone filming. Did he crash one one day? He was the drone king. Right, but did something ever go wrong? Okay, so this is just like, we're just fucking around.
Starting point is 00:14:32 If you're still local, we can meet at the Lobster Trap to get some shots of you out front. Please let us know your availability. Thanks, blah, blah, blah. Now, that's an F-minus prank. Yeah, like it's too... If you have a functioning brain, that's so obviously not real.
Starting point is 00:14:46 I would post that on Twitter and say, like, look at this. Somebody's trying to prank me. If I was Donnie, I'd be mad at my friend. Like, how do you fuck this up so bad? Yeah, you laid it on way too thick. Hometown heroes. Spelled wrong. Thriving.
Starting point is 00:15:00 Cape Cod's Times, not what it's called. Right. strong thriving kate codd's times not what it's called right but but also just like thriving career at the famed lobster trap is over the top over the top and then failed drone pilot like again you know if it was hank or something and he sliced his finger off if there's a reason i don't know but it all just sounds so over the top and then we get this screenshot this this this this other text now i i guess this is what i can't figure out i i don't think it was sent because yeah so if you look at the top it says ignore oh and i think wait that means i think festoli oh yeah sent it to his dad and his dad
Starting point is 00:15:38 said son just i think you should ignore this and he he ran by, he ran his, what he wanted to say, by his father. And this was Fasoli's response. I don't know who you are, but this is an incredibly rude text to send to someone. I worked at the Lobster Trap for six years as a valet and made it out of Bourne, Massachusetts to go live in New York City. And I currently work at the biggest media company in the United States. Not true. I didn't pick up that one until right now i must have glossed over that until right now not even remotely close there are literal empires light years ahead of us oh does vasoli work at
Starting point is 00:16:21 disney i was gonna say disneyPN, ABC, ever heard of them? I am no, quote, failed drone pilot. My work is displayed throughout hundreds of videos on a major network that has more followers than the Cape Cod Times does. You sent me this message and I was droning in Alaska while you're sitting there cold calling and making outlandish takes. I don't know where you're getting your information from, but you can take my name off any list you have for this so-called quote-unquote peace because I have made more of my life than anyone my age ever did from that town.
Starting point is 00:16:57 What the fuck is wrong with this kid? In Facilli's defense, he's like spoken publicly about his head injuries playing football. Bro, you could have told me that before I said anything. John said, is he all there? Nobody spoke up and said the guy is brain damaged. I could have used that too. Bro, we were locked in eyes.
Starting point is 00:17:19 Where was an eye being like, eh? Well, that changes things. From public public spoken publicly where what forum was he on so you've been fucking presentations at concussion protocol what are you talking about also publicly told me but like the fact that i know about yeah yeah that that means it might if he just randomly knows it without having have hanging had a conversation it must must be. You never know him. Also, I would go as far to say, unless you had a career, you had to stop playing high school football, career-ending injury from a hit, anybody who played football. We give this kid planes federal airspace fucking airborne vehicles yeah i couldn't play fucking game god football anymore
Starting point is 00:18:18 but it'll be up a plane i got it part of me thinks it's even funnier that he's running it by his dad and being like dad she's all over linkedin yeah so like he runs it by his dad being like what should i say like here's what i want to say you anytime i do this i fucking send what i write you know what i mean yeah here's what i want to say you anytime i do this i fucking send whatever i you know what i mean yeah like here's what i want to send john if i type that all out and you said no i wouldn't do that i'd say well never mind yeah i shouldn't have asked you right uh now the fact that it's a picture of you know he must have never sent it yeah because you would have the screenshot of the
Starting point is 00:19:00 text but um he said to his dad at least but yeah yeah the fact that this ever just came through his his brain is just so funny it's it's insane and again like the way maybe i don't know born massey i mean but i i know born i used to play hockey there a little bit i don't know the city or the town incredibly well but i never had the idea of born i drive through when i go to the falmouth to get the ferry to the vineyard i never had the idea that it was like this bad town where he's like i made it out like right yeah yeah yeah like uh the to me the they actually, I'll say this about Bournemouth, Gallo Ice Rink, which is the arena there, right by the bridge, they used to have clear benches in hockey.
Starting point is 00:19:55 So, like, just the boards on the bench were clear. I don't understand the reasoning behind it, but it was pretty cool. Shout out to Kevin Euclid. Euc's from Bourne? No? No, he played on the Born. Oh, okay. Well, shout out to Sammy Adams, Matty Trump, Lazy Boy, Mike Studd.
Starting point is 00:20:15 Mike Studd? You're barely getting bronze so far. Two of the greatest rappers of all time came out of Born, Massachusetts, bro. Bobby Orr? Bobby Orr? No. Bobby Orr from Montreal.
Starting point is 00:20:30 Well, it says Bobby Orr. He might have lived there, but Bobby Orr's Canadian. Uh, the... Um... Yeah, maybe he must have just been... You can't just live there. You gotta be, like, from there. Yeah, I was gonna say, like... I'll't just live there. You've got to be from there. Yeah, I was going to say...
Starting point is 00:20:46 I'll tell you what. After that, pretty slim pickings. After Sammy Adams... Is Shaughnessy from... Oh, yeah. No, these are just... They must have just lived there for a little bit, I guess. That Wikipedia's hurting.
Starting point is 00:20:59 All right, Fizzoli, maybe you are one. Let's see if Sammy Adams is actually from there. No, Cambridge. I don't know... So, wait, go back to that list. Maybe you are one. Let's see if Sammy Adams is actually from there. No, Cambridge. I don't know. So, wait. Go back to that list. Are you sure you were at Bourne, Massachusetts?
Starting point is 00:21:11 Yeah. It says notable people. Bourne, Massachusetts. Very weird. That's why you can't trust Wikipedia. There's a whole list of people saying you're born there and you're just not from there. All right. So, I don't know. Nick Pistoli is the most famous person ever born in Massachusetts.
Starting point is 00:21:27 I just – there's so many stop points. Like the word hero, downfall. Why would anyone ever be texting? Like even if you were like one of those, don't think they just say like hey man we're writing a fucking piece about people's lives that fell apart you want to be in on it you know that's not how those things work yeah so yeah i'm gonna do a glowing article on you that's how they fucking ask right and then it's like hey you fat piece of shit look at it you want to be in the paper so i mean i'm trying to think, if you got a text that was like,
Starting point is 00:22:07 hey, John, I'm from, like, the Fall River Times. We're doing an article. Herald News. I'm from the Fall River Herald News. I'm doing an article on people who, like, have made it in the media world from our town, you would do it, right? I've done it. Yeah, right. I've done things like this before.
Starting point is 00:22:33 So what would it have to be? Obviously, this is a red flag. I've done it with a guy who, when I was a kid, I would read his sports articles. It was funny. Yeah. And, like, I, like – That's probably, like, a moment – you almost feel like you made it on that moment. Yeah, 100%.
Starting point is 00:22:49 Like, the first time I got to, like, not just call into WFAN, but I was, like, on the show, and they gave me, like, the thing on the screen. I was like, this is it, man. I made it. Yeah. That's all you need. That Viva tattoo is so thick and dark. That Viva tattoo, fuck, land on the plug. It's so thick and dark.
Starting point is 00:23:11 That thing is doozy, man. If it said, like, you know, we want to cover your, like, rise to fame and, like, your subsequent, like, embarrassment. You you know i don't know i just be like what at the very least i'd be like no or just like i ignore it but it's very funny to to get all riled up the least of which being like i don't know what if they like publish this if you really thought it was real you know what i mean now you're just like giving this writer ammo i don't know what the whole thing like none of it makes sense that the response to get duped by this is just absolutely it's crazy i i would be i would if my friend showed me that like you fucking idiot you fuck the duck like he's not gonna believe this i don't know he had high school football injuries
Starting point is 00:23:59 you got lucky all right you got lucky Alright you got lucky I can't tell if this is a roast This is TJ's dad What is this? Funny to see KFC and Fights Making fun of the office makeover After their self-directed And self-admitted disaster Of a studio makeover
Starting point is 00:24:15 Well said in the second half By Fights Same is true in their studio You guys make great content In that dated wood panel disaster Did TJ's dad like make the new office are we like trashing on tj's dad's work i have no clue i didn't read this as a roast or a compliment but somebody came up to me and said did you see uh tim hitching or tj's dad roasting you guys
Starting point is 00:24:38 i don't know i feel like that's kind of a roast yeah i mean it's not i guess what teenage dad the same people design the office design the studio it's not it's not some you know it's not some crazy coincidence we didn't design this i i i i would say uh we designed we had we had yeah we came up with the idea we didn't wait to execute yeah i mean both of them suck and both of them yeah like you can make good content in a shitty room yeah it doesn't make it not a shitty room right you can make better content in a better room probably you could have a you know i don't i honestly don't even know if i agree with that that's why i think we said i said last time with the part that mr hitchings liked is you just like i don't like do what you do in it is what makes it cool right it's if you try too hard it fucking doesn't look lame if you don't know. What you do in it is what makes it cool. If you try too hard, it doesn't look lame. If you just do what you did, it looks lame.
Starting point is 00:25:30 I will say with the new office, no denying that whether the couches are ugly, they don't make sense, the outlets, all that shit, the amount of banter and talking and interaction and stool scenes like i think it's up like a billion percent yeah like the stool scenes guys are like i have so much more to work with that's good and and i and i don't even but it's funny it's not because i don't wait sorry well let's go equal or son never mind i got because i have one tweet i don't think it's about it's not about how the office looks i don't think it would be better if we like nailed it. I don't think it's any worse because we didn't. I think it's just that like,
Starting point is 00:26:10 there is like something, I don't know. Like something just changed in my head where there was just a date on the calendar where I was like, I'm not going to go out there more. Yeah. And maybe at the time it was because I, I never went out there and I was like,
Starting point is 00:26:23 boy, I would hang out here if I had a couch to sit on. But it was just like, I don't know, there's all these desks, and everyone's working, and I'm just not. Yeah, I'll say that. We just agreed upon that it's more of a social thing now. Now I go out there. If we had made that same agreement somehow without redesigning it,
Starting point is 00:26:40 I probably would just be out there more often anyway. So it's more about just the mindset and doing it.'s also why like when we were trying to design it we had different you know schools of thoughts about what you should put in there and people were like we don't even use the bar we're not going to use these things you have to do it so whether there's a nice couch or an ugly couch you have to go out there and talk to people and poke the bear and fuck with people and play pranks and that's how you get the content, uh, whether it's cool or not, you know? So I,
Starting point is 00:27:06 I mean, those guys I think are loving it. If I heard Liam was like, you know, um, but again, I don't think it's necessarily because of TJ's dad designing it. Uh,
Starting point is 00:27:16 so yeah. So we had the, uh, for solely tweet. It was a big weekend there where there's also, this isn't the one that's my favorite of the weekend uh but the um jersey jerry just getting a ride home from pittsburgh what you didn't see that no i think it was thursday night i just i returned to twitter like yesterday so i don't
Starting point is 00:27:37 quite know everything dude jersey jerry that's just a random dude? Jersey Jerry and Nick Turani played in some celebrity softball game in Pittsburgh. Turani did? Yeah. Cool. Oh, Philip Turani's running that fucking – I texted him. I was like, why do you run like that? He runs like an anime character. It's unbelievable.
Starting point is 00:27:56 Does he do – But not so much so that it's like he's playing a joke. It looks cool, like he's doing a thing. It's like that's just what Nick runs like, which isn't shocking. I don't think. I was going to say, did you think that Nick was going to be like a gazelle out there? No, I think Nick's more athletic than people would think he is because he's kind of – this is looking worse and worse for Nick. But you know what I mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:19 I remember Nick being like, why the fuck does everyone think I'm not athletic at all when he was doing Barstool vs. America and winning stuff? Got it. But again, in his defense, he does not exactly put out the vibe. Yeah, I don't think he tries to get people to think he's athletic, but I think he's more athletic than you think. However, this video
Starting point is 00:28:37 does not bode well for him. I would check the Yak. It might be there, too. Whatever. The point is that fucking Jersey Jerry's flight got cancelled. Which is, you know, because the aliens are here,
Starting point is 00:28:56 by the way. Every flight's still getting cancelled for like a month and a half now. Is this Nick? Yeah. Is that a bad swing? Oh my god, dude! He has the... Yeah. That's not a bad swing. Oh, my God, dude. He has the... Yeah. He has that going on.
Starting point is 00:29:09 It looks like he's trying to walk and chew gum at the same time. Like, he read a book on how to run right before it. Yeah. It's a good hit, though. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's not a bad video. It's fine.
Starting point is 00:29:19 It's a goofy run. I don't even know if it's goofy. It's an unorthodox run. Like a video game. Yeah. Yeah. A video game ninja running. That one where you did, like, PQ or whatever it is yeah what is it quap quap like it's just like yeah moving everything individually yeah it is a little locomotive yeah um but jerry so oh maybe
Starting point is 00:29:40 it was saturday night whatever fucking night it was. Jerry had his flights canceled and then got a ride home from some guy in Pittsburgh. It's an 11-hour round trip. It's a lot longer than I thought it was. It's like six hours each way or something like that. Wait. He got a ride to and back? No. So the guy – they're in Pittsburgh.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Yeah. The guy drove him to Pittsburgh, to Jersey, and then drove back to get to work in the morning oh yeah because he had to return and and i he was not going he didn't hitch a ride with someone going to jersey no the guy dropped him off a jersey turned around drove back to pittsburgh it and bro it is come on i i and jerry made a video where he was like, this guy is nuts. And he's like, I guess the guy at the cookout worked all day. And Jerry said he sweat so much he had to change clothes three times, grilled for the whole cookout all day. And then drove Jerry home and then drove back to get back to work next morning. I'd be like, dude, no. I don't know what Jerry had to come home for, but i'd be like well no there's so many reasons i would say no the top two being one i i would feel uncomfortable
Starting point is 00:30:51 making someone do that no no number one is i don't want to because i that i feel in these entertainment okay yeah i have three i have three number one being i just don't want to be around yeah and then like tied for second being i wouldn't want to put anybody out like that and feel like i have like I owe them or whatever. Actually, that's probably one. Two is that I'd feel in debt to you. Like the whole ride. I can't sleep.
Starting point is 00:31:10 I got to talk to you. And then my second, third, whatever, maybe potentially first, anybody who will do this will just like fucking drive you off a bridge. They're a crazy person. They're a fucking crazy person. That is insane. See, that one, that doesn't – I would be fine in the car with a crazy person. Wait, one more thing. This guy... So Jerry had to go to a cookout? That's why he was in Pittsburgh?
Starting point is 00:31:30 No, he did the... I guess there was a cookout before the celebrity game. Okay. This guy, was he involved in the same things as Jerry, or was he just a fan in town? I got that vibe from the video. I got the vibe from Jerry's video. I have no idea. I didn't do all that much research. I got the vibe from Jerryerry's video i have no idea and do all that much research i got the
Starting point is 00:31:45 vibe from jerry's video that this guy was doing kind of providing the food for the celebrity game okay so he's at least like it's not just like i could absolutely be wrong i live in pittsburgh i saw your tweets like let's go yes he's at least like somewhat like they had some kind of interactions before that it wasn't like that doesn't really make it any better but i at least at least it's better than like i'm just like from pittsburgh and like i'll do anything because you're in town i cannot believe this i um jerry's in that weird spot where he's like a folk hero you know what i mean he's like such funny guy. And he plays with like the big dogs. And he'll like shit his pants.
Starting point is 00:32:29 But, you know, I don't know. It's just like wacky Jerry shit that people just like want to be a part of that. But that's crazy. There's a 0% chance. You know what's funny? 0% chance I take this ride. I honestly am not – it's not because of fear of physical stuff. It's fear of the conversations I have to have in my car.
Starting point is 00:32:53 I have a better chance of giving this ride than I do receiving it, right? By a billion percent. Right. By a billion percent. Because I'm a pussy and like a pushover, I want to please people, people pleaser. I could see myself getting talked into like, all right, I'll drive you there. Just ask. Yeah, just ask.
Starting point is 00:33:15 If I'm sober, just ask. I'll drive you wherever the fuck you want to go. But I'm not. I'm not. Nah. Nah, I'm not doing that. Yeah. Well, you think that guy like halfway through his return trip was like, why the fuck did
Starting point is 00:33:26 I do this? Bro. Or do you think the whole time he was like, that's cool. And then he had to go to work. He came home, left work to drive. I think it's like 11 hours around him or anything. Any tweets from him or anything? Any like follow up?
Starting point is 00:33:35 He was like live tweeting it. I don't know about live tweeting it, but. The guy. Yeah. Jerry tagged him. I forget his name. He gave him a T, I think. I'm trying to think through this
Starting point is 00:33:45 i think that there's actually like jerry has i'm home appreciate my followers how many did you get how many fucking people how many people are following this fucking he drove jerry home this is a little bit old school barstool although i don't think anyone has a story like this i say old school in the sense that like there a time where people would drop everything for someone at Barstool. Yeah. I still get it to an extent. I'm very grateful for last year at Keegan's birthday party. Some guy was like, I own a table company.
Starting point is 00:34:14 I'll give you tables. And I needed to fix the air conditioner. This guy, Ryan, who owns Wesco Air Conditioning, was like, I got you. Things like that where they just show up. Speaking of that, no update on the Chi trucks. I don't know. Maybe people are helping me.
Starting point is 00:34:31 You probably have a Chi truck company who wants to give you a fucking truck. I think Nick monitors our mentions. I think he would have sent it to me if he did. I'm going to keep requesting it with no ability to access me this is tweet me nick will see it let's see uh no handout boss jerry paid me for my time but i didn't do it because he's jersey jerry jerry's one of the nicest guys out there
Starting point is 00:35:01 at our miami tailgate he asked me every like 15 minutes if I needed help stand up guy all that's true good yeah if Jerry's the nicest guy ever and I very much like Jerry he just said absolutely fucking not I'm not taking this ride yeah and also I do want
Starting point is 00:35:19 to give the caveat maybe Jerry had something to get home for that he had to be super important this is some home alone shit and you know he's I want to give the caveat. Maybe Jerry had something to get home for that he had to be. I don't know. Super important. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. This is some home alone shit. And, you know, he's he's Gus Polinsky and he's driving the mom home. Like, OK, whatever.
Starting point is 00:35:32 But this just seems like, I don't know, wait like another hour for your new flight or take a car, rent a car, take a train. It's a lot of ways to get from Pittsburgh. I've had some flights canceled recently. It's pretty simple. You just hang out in the airport until your rich friend gets a private jet. I don't know if I said it. Who doesn't do that? It's so easy.
Starting point is 00:35:57 My buddy coming home from Canada walked across the border. Did I say that? I don't know if I said it on the podcast. I don't know how he did it but we all got out two of my friends didn't one had to like hitch hitch a ride across the border uh and one just sent a video of him fucking walking along the side of the road what's the process like i've only seen the borders crossed on foot through movies like sicario Mexico. I don't even... Sicario is exactly what I was picturing.
Starting point is 00:36:27 I don't know what happened, but he was just like, I'm walking across the border. Holy shit. I think that Jersey Jerry has a better chance of getting a ride like he did than real celebrities. You know what I mean? Yeah, because you wouldn't ask.
Starting point is 00:36:43 You wouldn't ask. People wouldn't think. Also, people would be like, fuck you. You can go get a private jet or whatever. Jerry's in the sweet spot of beloved, big enough that he's known and people kind of feel cool about it, but small enough that people will still be like, I'll help that guy. There's a better chance
Starting point is 00:36:59 if Leonardo DiCaprio was like, I need a ride somewhere, he probably doesn't get a ride from Pittsburgh. George Jerry would, though. What a fucking wacky world, man. That is... Imagine Jerry shit his pants in your car or something wild. He's not exactly known to be the best traveler, world traveler out there.
Starting point is 00:37:18 The Barstool Sportsbook. It's the best place to place your bets and make money. Might I recommend right now just bet against Justin Verlander and Max Scherzer pretty much all the time. If you just stay the course with that, you'll probably be fine.
Starting point is 00:37:35 A gem here and there. Scherzer just went seven scoreless. Other than that, you're pretty much guaranteed they'll give up four or five runs, maybe six every single time. Can't get to the six. It is amazing how much it backfired for the Mets. I'd bet on the Diamondbacks if I were you. And the D-backs on the play, baby.
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Starting point is 00:38:55 Gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER. You were hot and bothered on Twitter this weekend in general. You were fired up about that one reply to me about Covenant. Oh, God. That one sent you into a spiral, too.vin sent it to me about the covenant and i accidentally opened it and like i just saw like the top reply or the first reply or whatever well i i talked about the budget i said the budget was 55 million the movie only made 20 million it's i was saying it's a very it's a good movie i think it's one of the biggest like uh economic flops ever and and reply this has happened to me occasionally where i'll accidentally
Starting point is 00:39:32 just like my thumb will hit a tweet and it'll open and i'll see a reply that one since i've given up replies and this is this was one of like the first replies because i saw like the second kevin tweeted it so this was one of like the first replies can you open it so i can read it so much of those budgets are salaries and marketing imagine if it was just no name actors doing a good job would be profitable oh yeah you fucking moron imagine if movies just didn't have movie stars they'd be so good and make so much money you god damn every time every time this happens where i accidentally open a tweet and see, I get... You goddamn idiot. I'm so mad.
Starting point is 00:40:07 You goddamn idiot. It's almost like a nice look in the mirror, like what I was like when I was reading these things. Yeah, yeah. Where I'm like, oh, it so clearly changes my mood. When I'm just spending my day doing this all the time... Doomscrolling is the realest shit in the world. I was furious. Imagine if they just had no-name actors doing movies.
Starting point is 00:40:26 Wouldn't make money. Oh, yeah. They'd make fucking boatloads of movies. One of the oldest professions in the world. That is sports radio callers right there. Why don't they just call up the kid and he'll hit 50 home runs. The good players, you need
Starting point is 00:40:42 the good players to play good and they need money. You know the best teams in history had no all-stars. This is the stupidest thing I've ever fucking heard. Yeah, that, that, that's, that's the, uh, that's the barstool. That's like what they want me, uh, what I want us to do a barstool here. They're like, just go find like no name, cheap talent. That's going to, you know, find me the next Alex Cooper. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:41:05 Yeah, let me just go do that. Got it. On it right now. Let me just go just fucking make another billion-dollar franchise from a nobody. That'll be real fucking easy. You assholes. This guy. Okay, my last thing.
Starting point is 00:41:19 I don't know if this is really a Barstool Twitter roundup, but more just a Barstool roundup. Monkey Boy is going to win Oscars. Monkey Boy is an all-time. I think I'm gone that day. I'm so upset. I would absolutely go to that game. July 28th. In where is it?
Starting point is 00:41:37 Nashville, New Hampshire. Monkey Boy is the story of a local minor league baseball team who had a mascot called monkey boy and this fan ran out on the field to fuck with him and tackled him and he like hit his head and got injured and never i don't think he necessarily even got injured i think he was just like i'm not doing this ever again like you assholes are like attacking me like fuck you i don't know whatever whatever the reason is monkey boy retired and it like crushed this this local town in in new hampshire uh so nick and the gang uh went up there and they're and they're making a documentary with michelangelo about uh monkey boy coming out for one more game and the the city's like buzzing and it is i mean it looks like one of the
Starting point is 00:42:27 it has potential to be reenacting it and everything it has potential to be that one clip of when there's like a skeptical uh like local is like what are you guys doing filming you know they're like we're doing a thing on monkey boy like he might come back and he was like oh that would be that'd be great that's fantastic that's fantastic just overwhelmed with emotion he went from like what are you guys doing oh that's fantastic spectacular so some good shit going on uh over on on social. Follow everybody on the Barstool team because we'll do a roundup each and every week. This week had a lot. We're not going to force anything.
Starting point is 00:43:11 This week had a lot. Yeah, this was a ton. This was a ton. We have a lot of discipline. We don't need to do it. We're just kidding. Who's our interview today? None.
Starting point is 00:43:23 None? All right. Let's roll then. We got a lot of topics to touch upon, and then we'll get into our voicemails. It's the biggest entertainment week in history. Yes. We have Oppenheimer and Barbie and Out of Order, episode five. Episode five.
Starting point is 00:43:40 Episode five. You know, the three most anticipated pieces of content maybe the world has ever seen. Dude, did you see this graphic Paz made this morning? It's so sick. I think I know exactly what you're talking about, and it's the three things? No, not that one. It's very similar, but...
Starting point is 00:43:57 Great. Barbie and Oppenheimer. Who made the original Barbie and Oppenheimer shaking hands thing? I don't know The dramatics are so absurd You would think it's the first time in human history That two movies have come out at the same time It's like a regular thing, right?
Starting point is 00:44:14 I feel like they used to do this all the time with Blockbuster I'm pretty sure I don't know I'm almost positive that at least for 4th of July And some of the big dates I think they try and make sure they're not on the same day Because then you don't know on the weekend I'm almost positive that at least for 4th of July and some of the big dates that – I think they try and make sure they're not on the same day because then you don't know on the weekend. No, I know.
Starting point is 00:44:31 But I feel like there have been movies that have gone head-to-head before. I think this is another example of Twitter is not the real world where it's like – I think as much fun as it is on Twitter, I think both movies are not going to have the opening they should have. Don't get me wrong. I don't know why they would ever do it. And I believe it's the same studio. Because I read that Christopher Nolan was upset. Yeah, that Warner Brothers did this to him.
Starting point is 00:44:58 Yeah, I think they're both Warner Brothers. And then you got Tom Cruise in the mix mad about the IMAX thing, which is like, get the fuck out of here. What was that? He likes to own the IMAX, all of Iaxes i think i think when his mission impossible movies drop the only thing that airs in imax for the month is so he's mad just that there will be other movies on imax screens the same month that his movies out which is like okay tom fucking relax dude um i feel like unless let's see uh this is an article why did barbie and oppenheimer choose the same date the pop culture conversation
Starting point is 00:45:34 entirely done beside the excitement a couple why isn't it just like the sentence just say why they did it what are you doing right now okay here it is to understand the reasoning behind this we have to look at the uh at the deal director christopher nolan made with universal when he agreed to partner with them on the film leaving his 19-year relationship with warner brothers behind nolan signed a deal with universal in 2021 maybe that's it i think barbie is so it's like so uh okay i thought they were that because no one was mad at them i thought that meant they were the same studio no it's the opposite he's like fuck you yeah but that's cutting off your nose to spite your face because you're gonna to have a lesser
Starting point is 00:46:05 weekend. Right. But not because of me. I'm seeing both on Thursday. I like a good old spite. You know, I actually think. Do you think there's a chance that this has caused so much hype? They actually both will make more money than if they were solo.
Starting point is 00:46:18 I think that's the general vibe on Twitter. Yeah. I think that's a reality. Yeah. I think that makes sense logically, but will not make sense logically if that makes sense. I saw a tweet talking about how studios are going to start doing this on purpose because this was clearly like an accident, like a marketing accident. You know there's some marketing guy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:35 We did this on purpose. But studios are going to start doing this and it will never work again because Twitter will make that cringy now. Right. Yeah. They'll ruin it every time. This was natural. It happened. There's this underlying thing time. This was natural. It happened. There's this underlying thing of spite, I think, that makes it cool.
Starting point is 00:46:49 I think there will be more people who go see Oppenheimer than maybe originally would not have because of the hype. But I also think if you just own a weekend. I think there are people who are just like, let's go to the movies. I think there are people who go to see a movie, and there are people who are like like, let's go to the movies. Not like – I think there are people who go to see a movie and there are people who are like, let's just go to the movies. And then they kind of like, let's figure out a movie to go see. And if Oppenheimer is the only one that week or Barbie is the only one that week, like you go then. But I feel like – like I don't think I'm going to like Barbie and I don't – I ordinarily would not have gone to see it.
Starting point is 00:47:23 I'm going to go do like a double feature thing, you know, because it's just like what's going on. I think I'm doing 445 and 850. I think I'm doing like a 4 and a 740 or something like that. I think, Jackie, you sent a text about next Thursday, so write those down that we're both going to see Barbary at 4. There is, like I think there is some truth to the, that there's this natural marketing,
Starting point is 00:47:46 but I don't think sharing, cause there's only just so many times in a day. There's so much time in a day. And yeah, I think there was something like 20,000 people. But that's like nothing. That's right. 20,000 people is nothing in the, in the big scheme of,
Starting point is 00:47:57 you know, the, the budgets and the box offices we're talking about. Um, I think it, it's the perfect storm of wildly different type movies you know uh wildly different demographics like there is i guess a world where they both kind of can live you know i bet there's a fuck ton of barbie fans who don't give a shit about the story of
Starting point is 00:48:18 oppenheimer you know um and but i guess the vice versa the plus with that is it is the perfect like couples where it's like I'll go see Barbara with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I mean. Like they are opposites but they compliment each other, both big names, all that shit. They don't match. They go together. Yes. To me, it's like,
Starting point is 00:48:46 why, unless the date means something, unless it's like, you need to have a movie drop on this day or you look bad or something like that, I don't know. It has to be on Memorial Day weekend because we need to be like the big movie of the summer.
Starting point is 00:49:02 Other than like that sort of shit, like who fucking cares if Oppenheimer's August 1st orst or july i think it just happened because the studios i guess don't talk to each other so i think it happened and very naturally at first and then they were gonna move it then and they were like no never mind this is actually kind of working let's leave it oh okay i think as i understand i i would picture it would be more like i'm not gonna move it well i'm not gonna move yeah fuck you then you you know, because you're basically like conceding. But like, I don't think Drake even ended up dropping anything.
Starting point is 00:49:31 But he said he was dropping an album a couple weeks ago and then was like, I'm going to move it for Young Thug. Like, to me, it just feels like, I don't know. I would never have any, like, pride over a random release date. Right. know i would never have any like pride over a random release date right let's say if if i had like an album or something coming out about my birthday and it's like on my birthday you have to do it for some reason on my birthday then fine but if it's just random days who fucking cares yeah so i think uh i guess time will tell i just don't think it's possible for like both movies to do like 200 million each or something like that. There's just not that many people, right?
Starting point is 00:50:06 Unless that many more new people go and that many people double up. But I think I'm really going to hate Barbie. I can't wait. It's been a while since I truly hated something that's really, really beloved by people. That's what I love. That's when I shine. I don't want to hate it. I actually am going in with an open mind shine. I don't want to hate it. I actually am going in with an open mind,
Starting point is 00:50:26 but I can't wait to hate it. I'm going to love it. Particularly seeing the Mamma Mia next to it. I do like... Gosling is really playing this very well. He's just a stud. He was doing red carpets with that... What was that chick?
Starting point is 00:50:43 The British chick who does those interviews. Wait, does that already have 21.4 million views? 31.4. I haven't seen it. I started to watch it. Can you just hit play on that? Does he crush this? That's 31,000.
Starting point is 00:50:57 It's 1,000. Oh, oh, okay. Never mind, never mind. You saw his Ken Splane quote? No. They asked him about what are his thoughts on Barbie, and he's like, well, I'm not going to Ken-splain it to you. He's smart. He knows exactly what he's doing.
Starting point is 00:51:11 Whoever did, like, the rollout for Barbie is probably going to get very, very rich because it's been pretty fucking killer. Yeah. Oppenheimer, I would almost say the opposite. I think Oppenheimer's just riding the wave of Barbie. Like, I haven't seen, like, many good things for Oppenheimer. would almost say the opposite I think Oppenheimer is just riding the wave of Barbie I haven't seen many good things for Oppenheimer I agree with that when they did the Barbie Malibu house
Starting point is 00:51:32 did you see that? just like this pink house just popped up in Malibu like the and a tweet I saw was that the it was Oppenheimer has the opportunity to do the funniest thing possible right now. I think Oppenheimer is going to fuck.
Starting point is 00:51:55 Because it's all – so actually this kind of – By the way, just real quick. Whenever I close my eyes and picture Christopher Nolan, it's the the snotty obnoxious guy from goodwill hunting the mathematician wait sorry like the guy who actually became the mathematician it's oh that's christopher nolan from google hunting stellan skarsgård yes yeah yes yes but particularly in that role because that guy's been that guy's been in like every movie ever that is that is a real house for that they're like or they like it made a little pop-up and i think they did like overnight because it's like it's very visible from the air
Starting point is 00:52:30 and i think everyone's like where the fuck that pink house come from sick it's an airbnb you can rent it so smart dude i would love to know the budget for that talking about the revenant and they were like when i said i said it has a 55 million dollar budget people never really know just like does that number include marketing or not include marketing? Is it the salaries? What is it? Blah, blah, blah. I mean, the Barbie number has got to be astronomical, right?
Starting point is 00:52:54 I would. Marketing. I don't know about the, like, I just feel like, I don't know. Could it all be, like, word of mouth? $100 million specifically for marketing. That's fucking nuts. The $145 million budget and 100 of it is marketing? I don't know that that's at $100 specifically for marketing.
Starting point is 00:53:17 Yeah. So, $45 million to make the movie, $100 million to push it. But that can't be right. I feel like... Because Gosling and Margot Robbie probably cost a hundred million. But that can't be right. I feel like... Because Gosling and Margot Robbie probably cost $40 million. Probably, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:33 And then you have $10 million... Well, that's what I mean. Like, sometimes maybe the movie might be different than, like, payroll. You know what I mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:42 So it might be Gosling gets $30 million, she gets $30. The production of the movie, meaning materials and special effects and blah blah blah, that costs $45. And then if you add it all up, it's like $300 or whatever.
Starting point is 00:53:55 All that stuff is like the... I saw Rob Delaney retweet someone being like, I'm a economic lawyer in Hollywood. And I read these things and I'm like, they know laws exist rob delaney is no no like the probably retweeted some guy uh being like like i i this is what because they're talking about the strike and stuff like that it's like talking about i i handle like hollywood budgets and i'm like do they yeah understand what laws are it's the money dude the it's crazy the the budgets for movies
Starting point is 00:54:29 are so wild we're like and there is no middle ground like it's a hundred million dollar movie or it's a free movie like an independent like rob did you see ed norton the other day talking about the wes anderson movies no he he i guess Ed Norton's done like five Wes Anderson movies. And he was like, I've made like $4,500 total for all these movies. And he said something like, this is why I do blah, blah, blah movies so that I can do these movies. Which is the shot toward the other. I can't remember the name of it. But he was kind of like.
Starting point is 00:55:02 But that's why those movies exist. And that's why those studios do those movies is to make money for like the good movie like the oscar any movie so i'm in for an oscar but like this this wes anderson shit like he's not gonna make money i feel like i've heard a lot about it like it's it's not gonna i don't i don't know enough i just know that like i know brad pitt's um film companies plan b studios his production company is like it's called Plan B because it's like when every studio turns them down, they can come to them.
Starting point is 00:55:29 Cool. And it's, they do movies that are, I believe in the article he said, $20 to $100 million budgets. That's just, that's the no man's land for movies. Yeah, right, right, right. Because you're not going to win the Oscar
Starting point is 00:55:42 for like an indie flick and you're not the blockbuster. There's nothing in between? Apparently not. Under $20 million or over $100 million? It probably doesn't make sense to do that. Because it's probably like, if you can do this for $40, we can cut corners and do this for $10. But if you need to do effects and all that, and you do it for $60, it's going to look like shit.
Starting point is 00:56:05 So if you're going to do those things, we have to do it. And if you're not going to do those things, we don't have to do effects and all that and you do it for 60, it's going to look like shit. So if you're going to do those things, we have to do it. And if you're not going to do those things, we don't have to do it at all. We can probably cut those scenes. We can do this and that because it probably is all bottom line bullshit where it's like, you know, it probably is those movies, those comedies that we all love that are missing. Yeah. It's like if you could just do like a fucking $70 million comedy. It doesn't need to be a huge thing, but it'll be good. And they're like, nah, let's just turn that into a fucking Marvel movie or let's turn that into Oscar-worthy shit. And by the way, I read a Twitter thread the other day on RoboCop.
Starting point is 00:56:39 RoboCop, the dude who played RoboCop, tried to method act. And said he talked and walked and acted like that they said it lasted two weeks and he was just relentlessly made fun of and gave up on it imagine the star of the movie being like nope
Starting point is 00:56:59 this is not I am not Kevin I am Robocop and they were just like shut the fuck up dude how long are you gonna put up with this bullshit get the fuck out of here method acting robocop is some shit dude um by the way real quick um remember it's something i wanted to bring up with the uh actor i just referenced who did you just reference? Brad Pitt. You heard of Del Toro
Starting point is 00:57:28 shoes? Yeah. Very nice shoe company. Yeah. I wore a pair of their shoes the other night. Yeah. They put on their Instagram story glad to see Feidelberg wearing our shoes. Do you know who the only other person on their
Starting point is 00:57:42 thing is? It's Brad Pitt. It is. It's the big two, baby. Wait, those are Del Toros? Those bright yellow things? Those aren't loafers, though, right? No, they're like a chocolate. And I did acknowledge one's a hard post, one's a story.
Starting point is 00:58:04 But that's okay. Brad Pitt called a hard post. one's a story. But that's okay. Brad Pitt called a hard post. I called a 24-hour window. Got to follow up with them, though, no? Yeah. I mean, that's the kind of shit. You should so be more influential in the fashion world than you are. Or than you get credit for, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:58:23 Or money for, I should say. You do get credit. You are influential. you just don't get any money for it my my big thing homeboy from our show yes yeah uh also uh it's not the greatest clip but i i got a dm from from a local beer money basketball league. The Premier Summer Basketball League in North Jersey. Hashtag BMBL. And they DM me this video of our guy just going nuts during the fucking game, just screaming and yelling at people. Imagine that dude just being a menace on the court at local men's league.
Starting point is 00:59:09 I can very easily imagine that. I guess we haven't done an episode since, right? So at our live show in Jersey, great show, good time. Thanks to everyone who came. If you came, you know the phrase 10 years and you know 17 slices. We'll always have that, Jersey City. 10 years and 17 slices will always be ours. But we did a meet and greet afterwards.
Starting point is 00:59:33 Come out, by the way, Minneapolis, Detroit, Buffalo, Madison, somewhere else. Columbus? Columbus. Columbus, yeah. Get tickets. We're coming. Get the tickets. We do such a bad job
Starting point is 00:59:45 of marketing yeah can you please just buy tickets so we don't have to do this I was just thinking to myself like when Barbie has some shit that they need to
Starting point is 00:59:52 like make sure it gets done they spend a hundred million dollars on it I'm always like ah I forgot to post about this all month like we had
Starting point is 01:00:01 we were like leading up to the show and it had been promoted like three times this one's not selling huh i wonder why nobody knows it's happening just please it physically pains me to promote so please just buy the tickets if you're in buffalo you know what is so funny i don't even remember Buffalo Madison Minneapolis Columbus Detroit Columbus
Starting point is 01:00:26 yeah probably some other places just go to the social look out and buy one of each in every city and you don't even have to come no please come
Starting point is 01:00:33 because I'd rather you come I know I hate I don't even care about money in Austin we had we had a sellout that then didn't look like a sellout like people didn't come for whatever reason
Starting point is 01:00:42 and I was like I'd rather the opposite I'd rather it be like we let a bunch of free people in and I got the fucking the full house. Indianapolis, Madison, Milwaukee, Cincinnati, Columbus, Pittsburgh, Minneapolis, Detroit, Buffalo. Jesus. What are we doing all that? When the fuck did that all get?
Starting point is 01:00:58 I will check. I'm not sure if everything's like official. Let's just fucking base. Nick said it's official. Okay. All right. When the fuck did that happen? if everything's like official. Let's just fucking... Nick said it's official. Okay. Yeah. All right. When the fuck did that happen?
Starting point is 01:01:09 September is Indianapolis, Milwaukee, October, Cincinnati, Columbia, Pittsburgh, and then... Yeah, I mean, I guess it makes... Yeah, one month. We do three shows.
Starting point is 01:01:17 Makes perfect sense. Yeah. That's like the whole like middle America that people have been wanting forever. Yeah. So you motherfuckers
Starting point is 01:01:23 better buy tickets. Please. And the meet and greet was happening and this guy rolls up he looks like a uh portnoy poser like a like a fake dave portnoy same sort of hair same schnoz the tan that dave used to have he doesn't have his cookie tan anymore air pods in shirt the whole show I didn't see that that would have drove me crazy I would have called that out I don't know what's going on he is so tan I thought he was a black man the whole show
Starting point is 01:01:55 he has the air pods in the sunglasses on top of his head a white button shirt buttoned down unbuttoned to his belly button, and then a pair of pink capri pants that were so tight, I genuinely thought those were female pants. Yeah. I was like, you borrow those from your girlfriend.
Starting point is 01:02:17 Looks like something out of the Barbie fucking budget. And then a pair of loafers on, rolls up like, his strut was just like, here I am to give you my picture. Let's go. You guys are taking a picture with me. Motherfuckers puts his arms around both of us. And he's like, tell Dave I'm coming for his bitch ass. One bite. Everybody lick my nuts.
Starting point is 01:02:39 And as he's doing all that, we're like, do you have a phone to take the picture? And he goes, nope. And he just stands there. And we were like, okay. So our guys are taking pictures with the camera and their phones, and he just walks. Walks. I don't know if he said that. To me, he went, nope, don't want one.
Starting point is 01:03:01 Nope, don't want one. It had to be that because somebody said, why would you have your AirPods in if you didn't have a phone? He had a phone and was just like, nope, I don't want one don't don't want one it had to be that because somebody said what why would you have your airpods and if he didn't have a phone he had a phone and was just like nope i don't want it unbelievable move uh and i i was like i don't know if that guy was even real i bet we never see him again he just like poof disappeared but apparently he's in the bmbl and uh i want more highlights of this guy i need highlights of him him screaming at refs and getting in fights with old men. I was this guy's sales manager. He's an absolute wild card.
Starting point is 01:03:33 Yeah, I bet that. Yeah, you being like, he goes nuts. Can you imagine or envision whatever you said? Can you envision him going nuts at men's league? It's like seeing a morbidly obese person. Can you see that person eating a thousand calories yeah i absolutely very easily can envision that uh two thousand calories or whatever i don't know what calories are in meals but yet again another round of uh what was that again this is from the guy oh yeah yeah so
Starting point is 01:04:02 there's just always some wacky shit that goes on at live shows this is why I love doing them um there was this guy
Starting point is 01:04:12 who came up afterwards at the meet and greet and gave gave us specifically John a set of
Starting point is 01:04:20 photography prints and that's happened before I got a picture of like you at the uh chicklets cup like chugging of photography prints. And that's happened before. I got a picture of you at the Chicklets Cup chugging a Whistlepig or a Pink Whitney. And then sometimes it's pictures of us on stage or it's like an old school barstool mural.
Starting point is 01:04:38 That's happened before. This guy, it was just photos. Oh, we got him here? No. That was like, let was just photos. Oh, we got him here. No. That was like, let me just wildly disturb everything with this photo. This is why I thought maybe you would throw any of the things in your hands at me. I was going to just point to you. It's right there what we're referencing.
Starting point is 01:05:00 You know, this is a nice glossy photo that makes sense to give to us. This guy was like, you're a prince of snowboarding. It was just a guy snowboarding. And I was like, is that you? John was like, I don't know. Is it him? I don't know. It's just people snowboarding.
Starting point is 01:05:19 And then this. I can't show that. And then this. It's unfortunately blurred, but let me tell you. These are the best tits I have ever seen in my life. It is a great pair of breasts. Do you think those are just really, really good fake ones or real? I think those might be really good fake. Yeah? It's a little bit.
Starting point is 01:05:45 It's a little bit. It's a little bit... There's not much of, like, a scar, but she also colored on her tits. I was going to say, the scarring is non-existent. Great tits from Jamie. She's got a little nameplate necklace. It's Jamie. Jamie.
Starting point is 01:05:59 As you can imagine, it's spelled incorrectly. That's... You can spell Jamie that way. Really? J-A-I-M-E? Yeah, Jamie's a dumb one. It can be J-A-M-I-E? J-A-I-M-E? Yeah, Jamie's a dumb one. It can be J-A-M-I-E or J-A-I-M-E. Well, you can spell anything any way you want. But there's a good amount
Starting point is 01:06:12 of Jamies who do it the J-A-I. And then he signs this. He signs this photo of his buddies posing with a pair of Jamie's tits. And it says
Starting point is 01:06:26 J... That's not you, is it J.F.? No. Okay. That kind of looks like how you do your J's and F's. Yeah, it kind of does. J.F., 2005, 2023. I don't know what the 2005 is, maybe. And then he puts one of one.
Starting point is 01:06:43 It's rare. At least this one's on a photo paper. It's just a one of one. Like, I mean, this is just printed. At least this one's like on photo paper. It's just a piece of paper with a pair of awesome tits printed on it. And he labeled it one of one. We haven't referenced this enough, Jackie. We got to just like blur the nipple or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:57 You got to see the roundness of it. If we get like demonetized or something for this episode, so be it. Show the world these tits. And as a matter of fact, I will go to KFC Barstool. I will bite the bullet and put this on my social media. I'll make this my fucking avatar. These tits are awesome. It's been a while since I saw Pear Boost.
Starting point is 01:07:23 Right? Yeah. Mama. Yeah. That is. It's been a while since I saw Pear Boots. Whoa. Right? Yeah. Mama. Yeah. That is. It's been since the last time I saw Sky Bree. But other than that, that girl is fucking a red dick. You know what?
Starting point is 01:07:34 I'm glad this is coming up because I have. I'm wondering if other people go through this issue. I have in the summer when When you're scrolling Instagram stories, getting horny before you find out if you're allowed to be horny. And since Nick's not here, I'll do it for him.
Starting point is 01:07:54 I'm talking about adults. But like... Why would you not allow to be horny? Like, because so you're just going through it and it's just like skin. Like, I don't know,
Starting point is 01:08:04 my dick sees people in bikinis, boobs, goes, whoa, boobs. And you just kind of like, you know, like you hear a noise, a bump in the night. But you're not allowed to. I don't know. Like, what if it's a relative? If all you see is skin first and your dick goes. If your dick gets so hard so fast. I mean, it's obviously not getting hard, but it's just going.
Starting point is 01:08:24 Okay, but if you're. It's going, whoa, what's that? Whoa, it's going, whoa, boobs. And whoa, skin. Or yeah, a coworker, a relative, a fucking – I don't know, an ex-girlfriend. Only one of those you're really not allowed to get turned on at. And it's your family member and it was your first example and it's very concerning. It's very concerning.
Starting point is 01:08:43 Well, I actually honestly – Listen, if I – I don't even like follow any family members. If I'm talking through and I see a hot coworker, I'm like, I don't give a fuck. You're hot. If I see an ex, it's like, yeah, this is going to be a problem. I'm like, jerk off to you later. If I see a friend's ex – Yeah, a friend's ex. Girlfriend or whatever.
Starting point is 01:08:59 I don't give a fuck. See, like I would – I feel not guilt, not bad, but i'd be like ah fuck if i like i'm look i'm not like fucking working to completion here but it's just it's just acknowledging it's acknowledging that there's a mostly exposed body in your eyes and then my eyes fucking pan up to the top left i'm like who's this supposed to be all right we're good like you don't have that sense of fear like fuck this might be... No one else has that? Let me tell you this much.
Starting point is 01:09:28 You guys all just getting horny to your family members? And you're all okay with it? I didn't know how else to get around this. There's only one person in the room who's getting afraid of getting horny for his family members here. I don't know. The weird thing is... The rest of us don't have the problem. Is that, like, I don't even follow any family members and I don't know. The weird thing is don't have the problem. Is that like
Starting point is 01:09:45 I don't even follow any family members and I don't have any like Yeah, okay, sure. Let me lean back. I don't even follow any family members. Go on Instagram.
Starting point is 01:09:54 What are boobs? I don't even know what you're talking about. I think it's an impossibility for me to like scroll. I don't follow. It couldn't even happen. I don't have my real life
Starting point is 01:10:03 connected to my fake life. Maybe that's your some edifice shit. That's just your greatest fear. It couldn't even happen. I don't have my real life connected to my fake life. Maybe that's your some Oedipus shit. That's just your greatest fear. It's just some, like, baby. Jerking off to your sisters. I'll tell you this much. This shit could be my identical twin. And I would get horny for these tits.
Starting point is 01:10:20 God damn, I wish her dick was bigger. That's great it's just so funny to be like here's two like really professional pictures of of snowboarding that was probably like thanks bro and then the jamie's tits are like going we're gonna like frame and put on the wall and shit uh you never know man you never know what you're gonna get with with kc radio live shows the crowd always there is always some like really fucking it always blows my mind how much there are how many people are like you know when you see like uh or i always hear stories of like you know we flew from like canada for this show i'm like you know when you see like a sign that's like at a Drake concert, like I came all the way from blah, blah, blah for you. I'm like, I get that.
Starting point is 01:11:06 Or things are like we made this shirt or I made you this thing. And I'm always like – I see that for like rock stars and like really legitimate celebrities. And there's always a few people who do it for our shows that still to this day just always blows my mind. Shout out to the people who go like above and beyond because it's crazy. Like for us? Okay. Sounds good, man. So
Starting point is 01:11:32 hang on. What did we say we were going to do? I was going to do a segment while John's gone. I can't stop thinking about it. Maybe every time he's just doing coke, that would be so funny. Yeah, I mean there's a strong chance that Feidelberg might just have a raging cocaine problem. He goes to the bathroom like five times an episode now.
Starting point is 01:11:54 And then the episode ends, and he's like, all right, I got to pee real quick. And then he comes back, and we're like, okay, let's do an answer to the internet now. He's like, all right, hang on, I'm going to pee. It's crazy. And imagine the whole time if he was just running in there like non-stop all day long and then it would be even more awkward that like if it is and eventually it comes out that it's a problem then we're doing
Starting point is 01:12:14 this segment like laughing about it but it was like yeah no man i was actually a fucking raging addict just blasting off in the bathroom it like we all agree something's wrong with this bladder right like it's not there's like small bladders there's i drink a lot of water there like tom and off in the bathroom. We all agree something's wrong with his bladder, right? There's small bladders. I drink a lot of water. Tom Scabelli is one of those guys who has to pee every hour. This is like every 15 minutes. And he does drink a lot, but at some point
Starting point is 01:12:36 it's like, I don't care how many waters you've had today, there just can't possibly be anything left in the tank. And I'm like, are you shitting yourself? I don't think so. The mystery continues. I feel like
Starting point is 01:12:51 maybe he's not even going to the bathroom. Maybe he's running and making a phone call. Maybe he's ripping cigs. Not even... We're going to have to start tailing him. Like, Vinny, go check out where he's going.
Starting point is 01:13:08 Imagine that. He's just, like, not even in the bathroom, and he's just, like, around the corner in, like, the closet doing some weird shit. Imagine he's just thinking about his horny sisters, and he's just. He's just checking his hair. I can't, I mean. What could it be? How's that cocaine? We're just convinced it's either a severe problem with your bladder or a severe problem with cocaine.
Starting point is 01:13:37 It's diabetes, obviously. I mean, have you gotten, have you at the doctor recently been like, I pee every 15 minutes? No. You should probably do that. You should probably tell them. Why? It's like normal pee. It's not.
Starting point is 01:13:52 The frequency is not normal. I'm going to start timing your pees. You just went seven minutes ago. This is going to be a one-pee show, probably. You'll probably pee right when we're done. I peed right before. So you peed right before. You peed in the middle. You're going to pee when we're done, and then you'll probably pee right when we're done. I peed right before. So you peed right before. You peed in the middle.
Starting point is 01:14:06 You're going to pee when we're done. And then you'll probably pee like – you'll be like, all right, I got to go do out of order, but let me pee first. It's crazy. I said my newest life hack is like when I'm editing, I'll chug a bunch of water and I won't let myself pee until I finish like a certain part of the edit. And then I let myself pee after I finish and I chug a bunch of water again and then I have to pee again and then I finish and then I just go back and forth until I finish.
Starting point is 01:14:31 It's always great to have a look at the artistic process. Just really like the all-time greats. How do you create your art? I can't wait until Jackie tries to combine this with her. Chug a bunch of water, take a fat piss. I can't wait until Jackie tries to combine this with her. I just chug a bunch of water, take a fat piss.
Starting point is 01:14:48 I can't wait until she combines this with her sleep habits and just pisses the bed. She's just going to be like, I'm sorry, I didn't wake up with my alarm. I woke up to me peeing the bed. That's what I do, too, since I don't wake up to alarms is I chug a bunch of water before a nap. Oh, this bitch is going to piss her pants. You are going to pee the bed for sure. No, I haven't done that yet. Yeah.
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Starting point is 01:16:34 The Adam 22, Len of the Plug sex tape situation continues to dominate the headlines. The video is out. Have you seen it? I have not seen it. I have not seen it either. Apparently, it's pirated all over the place, which they had to have known was going to happen. Because we kind of know Adam and kind of know Lena.
Starting point is 01:16:52 It makes it a little weird for me. It's a little... Covering the whole thing, I mean, the guy's dick is so fucking big. Pat said, I don't know if he used performance enhancing drugs or if he had the local 12 crane fucking help him lift it but like props in for getting hard uh the video's out um i i have
Starting point is 01:17:14 not seen it i will probably watch it at some point because i have sworn solemn promise to you that i in the world that have sex on camera um her the funniest part is the post-game interview with this guy justin black jason love justin love jason love jason love from blacked the interview with him started by a white guy by the way yeah very funny very you know feels i wonder what you're into sir um the post-game interview with him is so memeable and so fucking funny and so inappropriate i couldn't watch it did you did you know what they talked about did you hear about i saw like the cream pie yeah yeah i saw that and i was like the interviewer says you cream pie her at the end cream pie by the way is an exceptionally uh uncomfortable phrase for me to say i don't like
Starting point is 01:18:21 to say that word at all that sunny episode is one of the all-time most ridiculous things. The fact that it became somewhat common, like if a girl ever says cream pie to me, I'm like, I can't even fucking believe it. That's ridiculous that we have this slang term for just a pussy filled with cum. Holy shit. So the guy says, was it
Starting point is 01:18:48 cream pie? And his response was, again, so over the top that if there wasn't a video out, I would still be claiming it's fake. He was like, now, you know, that pussy hasn't been opened up in a long time. So I was in there opening it up, and I was in there
Starting point is 01:19:04 for like, you know 5 10 15 whatever minutes and my dick went numb and so it just happened i was like i don't know what's worse if you plan if she was just like yeah please come inside me or the idea that i needed to stretch it out to the point that my dick went numb all of it is just crazy and then uh and then they were they're like do you think that you fuck better than adam 22 and he's like well obviously yes obviously uh it is one of the funniest but like all the more, like, holy shit. I don't think this is going to end well. I just fear everybody sounds like they're all on board until, like, someone blows the building up. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:19:53 Now, the result is, Len of the Plug searches on Pornhub are up 4,000%. She jumped to the number one person on the page. I was going to say, she was, like, two, wasn't she? No, no, she was 23. But that's still, like, that's my point with this whole thing. She was the to say, she was like two, wasn't she? No, no, she was 23, but that's still like, that's my point with this whole thing. She was the 23rd, there's a bajillion porn stars. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:10 She's number 23. They make so much money on No Jumper. They make so much money on Plug Talk. They're already famous. They're already, you know, it's like, how much more did this add that it was worth it? But I guess a lot. I don't know, you're the number one search on Pornhub and maybe a lot of people
Starting point is 01:20:27 are going to continue watching that. It was two years ago we were interviewing Adam and he's like, yeah, we just got a Pornhouse. Pornhouse. And I didn't know him that well so I didn't even know they did porn.
Starting point is 01:20:35 And I knew he did let in the plug. I knew she was like an OnlyFans person. I didn't know they had done stuff together. I didn't know anything. I was like, wait, they have enough money for another house?
Starting point is 01:20:45 And that was like two or three years ago. That was, I think, at the very beginning or maybe before Plug Talk. It was before they formalized the show, right? Because that interview was why I followed Adam, and he definitely started doing Plug Talk for years after that. Now, Adam is still like, we're all good, man. And I'm just like, okie dokie, if you say so. It's just like all this stuff makes me so uncomfortable.
Starting point is 01:21:15 Like just people commenting on their relationship with sincerity. Even the jokes are a little uncomfortable, but the sincerity makes me more uncomfortable. And it's probably just because of my own shit but like i don't like anything with that i used to get uncomfortable with brady giselle stuff like i'm like that's a personal relationship i don't but that's your own the flip side that's why i probably couldn't watch the interview where i was like there's like people i kind of know and again like i i've never talked to any of them off air it's just like yeah i've at least That's probably why I couldn't watch the interview where I was like, there's people I kind of know. I've never talked to any of them off air.
Starting point is 01:21:49 It's just like I've at least sat down and had conversations with them. I've texted back and forth with Adam a little bit here and there to the point that I'm like – I texted him. I was like, can I do one minute man on this? Because I didn't even want to like – Yeah, that's the point. Well, that's what he said. The more the better. But I'm like, I just feel like I need to clear that. And so anything I might say we kind of know is under the guise of content. Well, that's what he said. He was like, the more the better. But I'm like, I just feel like I need to clear that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:22:08 And so anything I might say we kind of know is under the guise of content. Lena commented like an emoji face on it that was I think like the surprised one. And I was like, is this good or bad? Yeah. I don't want to like cross any lines. I mean, the amount of people just being like, you know, you're all trash and like your relationship is doomed is like, shut the fuck up. You know what I mean? I personally would not like that. That's my own personal opinion.
Starting point is 01:22:30 I thought it was very poignant the way Adam was like, there's a lot of dudes commenting on this as if they were in this situation. Yeah. And you and your girl are not. But all that being said, it is just – you know what's funny too? Funny about this whole thing it's just like there's just inherently a lot of hints of racism in the world still because like oh are there
Starting point is 01:22:55 but like even even you know in like like it's just it's it's different because he's a black performer yeah they say it she said it she said everybody different because he's a black performer. Yeah. They say it. She said it. She said everybody like like leading up to it. She was like, all my fans said they want me to. She said it to like her boyfriend's face. All my fans said they want me to do a BBC. The same thing is cream pie.
Starting point is 01:23:17 When you're just throwing BBC in like your conversation. But like, it's just it's this thing that he's just this gigantic black dude as if it was like you know be any better if it was an enormous white dude uh i almost think it's weirder if it was a gigantic white dude like a who's like a giant like a big show yeah if the mountain or yeah yeah like yeah if tyson fury fuck your girl is he a big dude or does he have a big dick? Tyson Fury? No. Oh, this guy.
Starting point is 01:23:50 He's... I don't know how tall he is. He's jacked. And I think his dick is just a tree trunk. I guess he is like the head main guy at Blacks. Oh, then I've seen... I think when you need a black guy to fuck you, you go... Yeah, 6'5". Dude, he is 6'5 five two thirty five and i take
Starting point is 01:24:07 thirty five of that is his dick um it's just it's a crazy crazy internet story man yeah uh also crazy the the the attempted murder from the the gold and dress guy. It's just further proof. It's odd to realize that it was 11 years. It's been going on for 11 years. And therefore, this picture was taken in 2015. So smack dab in the middle. She was right in the heart
Starting point is 01:24:38 of an 11 year They called it a campaign of domestic violence. When she took this picture she had been wait it doesn't what year is it now 2000 it was 2015 2003 2003 so that's eight years ago yep so when she took this picture she'd been avoiding murder for three years and then went viral and i and it was like and then what have to go on Ellen with this fucking guy why was he involved in it
Starting point is 01:25:08 I have a feeling why I mean it was his yeah why the fuck was he involved because it was her mom the wife's mom was the owner of the dress so you just go do that with your wife and your mom why is the husband there
Starting point is 01:25:24 yeah what the fuck is that about? Yeah, that guy. What a dickhead. What an asshole he is. He doesn't like Paul Dano. I'm surprised that she couldn't beat him up. I like how they blurred their faces on that one. What the fuck has been on Ellen?
Starting point is 01:25:37 I feel like she could have taken him. So yeah, that one was crazy. I can't even wrap my head around I've seen the videos a bunch I get the gist of what's going on I still can't wrap my head around The gang gang popcorn girls I can't but
Starting point is 01:25:55 Gang gang gang gang gang I watch it every time it comes up It's This girl Pinky World is So talented at it It's intoxicating She's so good at it. Put it on.
Starting point is 01:26:06 Give me volume. Gang gang. Gang gang. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Fire, fire. Gang gang. Yes, yes, yes. Oh, thank you, Padre.
Starting point is 01:26:16 I love you. Love you, love you, love you. Yes, popcorn. Yes, popcorn. Yes, popcorn. Yes, popcorn. Oh, special. Yes, platform. Yes, platform. Oh, special. Fire, fire.
Starting point is 01:26:29 Oh, thank you, Gia. That's my dress. We can match the flowers on my head. Beautiful. For you, pop. It is. I wish I had the discipline to not watch, but I don't. So, okay.
Starting point is 01:26:40 I needed a few. Is she... So people are jerking off to this. Yes. Yeah, this is a sexual thing, right... So people are jerking off to this. Yes. This is a sexual thing, right? They're jerking off to their family members. So she goes on TikTok and then these guys in the chat
Starting point is 01:26:57 tell her what to say with emojis and shit. You buy the emojis. So they're just paying her to say like gang gang Popcorn gang gang Is she popping popcorn with her hair Yes
Starting point is 01:27:11 It's incredible You know who her number one donator was Timbaland I mean that is He was probably like Y'all can see that That needs to be You know when you start a Zoom and it goes like, the other party is recording. Which they waited like two years to add.
Starting point is 01:27:30 Way too late. That, like, just started. We've been doing this for years. But that – like, you know, this should be – when you log in, like, hey, man, you're going to be – like, people will know how much money you sent to these fucking people. That's like when Instagram showed everyone their likes. Yes. Yeah, that was fucking terrible. Just need what your friends like. mind the so that that is bad for timbaland because it has brought
Starting point is 01:27:51 up timbaland talking about how he got horny for a leo when she was like 13 and then married his wife because she looked like a leo yeah that's a tough scene. Tough scene for Timbo. But okay, I still don't get two things. I buy the emoji and post it, and that makes her talk. That's what tells her what to say. And that money goes to her? To her account that's hooked up to her. And how much are we talking? I think that they're like what do you think $5
Starting point is 01:28:25 some are like fractions of cents like the lowest one is like is like a fraction of a cent but some of them go high it goes up to something incredibly high I know how much you mean and my other question is I don't kink shame or kink care
Starting point is 01:28:44 but how does this get anybody around like how do you like Don't kink shame or kink care. But how does this get anybody around? Like, how do you, like, like, actually, I can understand it because she's a hot chick just doing a weird, like, anime thing. That's what people are into. It doesn't do it for me. I get it. My question, though, is, is there, like, a finale? Is it, like, when she says, like, gang, gang, I'm going to come?
Starting point is 01:29:05 You know what I mean? Like, we all know it pours. Probably when she says, like, gang, gang, I'm going to come? You know what I mean? Like we all know it pours. Probably when she says the one you sent. I guess so, yeah. So you think it's just come, come, come, come, come? Yeah, yeah. She's constantly coming? How about I've only seen her and that other girl with the wig on. Are there a bunch?
Starting point is 01:29:17 Mm-hmm. Oh, now I really get it. Are they as good as? For the record, Pav just showed an alt chick. Yeah, that's all I'll tell you. Are they as good as... For the record, Patrick showed an alt chick. Yeah, that's all it takes. You got like a neck tattoo. I get it.
Starting point is 01:29:34 I wish that wasn't the first noise. Michael Jordan, three-pointer. Is that a dude? I think that's a dude. Love you too. Thanks for the roses. Is that a dude? I think that's a dude. Alright, I'm anti-LGBTQ. Yo, alright, bro.
Starting point is 01:30:18 My entire political world just got flipped over. Bro, I was like, oh, that's Christy Mack. That's Chris Mack, dog. Christopher Mack in the building. Let's be clear that Pinky World is the GOAT of this. No one else. Everyone else is playing for second place. That other girl was pretty good. Yeah, the number one female in Pinky World.
Starting point is 01:30:54 This guy's got a deeper laugh than me. How did this start? I have so many questions. Was someone on live and was just like, hey, how about I i'll say i'll just say whatever you guys tell me to say in the chat and then like it like it just becomes dang and when she goes and makes those noises yeah i was like this bitch can beat box it's a real talent oh i think i know i know what happens next time jackiees up. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 01:31:26 Jackie has to do this in the helmet. By the way, did you ever wear the helmet, Jackie? You didn't wear the helmet for one fucking minute. Actually, you know what? This is the punishment. You got to do this now. I actually meant to bring the helmet today to make up for it, but all. But you didn't.
Starting point is 01:31:41 So now you're going to do the gang popcorn thing. We can literally make this happen right now. Let's go. That's true. That would be crazy. I don't want the helmet on me. Well, the helmet's not the point. We don't need the helmet.
Starting point is 01:31:52 I just want to see Jackie just gang, gang, gang, gang. That would be so good. I do think I try to pump the brakes on some of the – I know I always speak in terms of the greatest ever, the worst ever, always hyperbole. I do try to pump the brakes on actually feeling that way though because I think that like no matter what is happening in history, it probably was the same way for the previous. This is getting weird this feels like like what is the equivalent to this in like the 50s you know like we're starting to get into territory that i'm just like i can't and i'm a dirty internet generation weirdo you know like we're from the fucking gutter and i'm like what are we doing here guys yeah the Yeah. What the fuck is going on? Can't we just put on Lena cheating on her husband with the big black guy and jerk off to that?
Starting point is 01:32:50 Come on. I'm not even looking for the sexual aspect of it, but, like, it's just, it happens. We are just now the people who are, like, so kids are going to hell in a handbasket. Yeah. It hasn't, but it's, there isn't really an equivalent, but like rap music,
Starting point is 01:33:10 rock music. Yeah. It was like, I mean, I guess there's something wrong with the kids these days. This is all the same, the same demo. It's just like the weird anime people.
Starting point is 01:33:19 Yeah. And it used to be, it went, you know, like anime porn. And before that was probably just like cartoon porn and before that was weird. Whatever those guys have liked all this time, this is the new version of that. But boy, I don't know.
Starting point is 01:33:34 It's like out of all the bad stuff out there, if I ever came home and my kids were like, gang, gang, gang, gang, gang, they're never going outside again. You know? But that's the way people thought about fucking video games. But I think there's something tangibly different. I don't know. You're probably right, but this just feels so weird. I agree, but I think that's the feeling everyone always had, too. We had our thing, but this one feels so weird i i i agree but i think that's the feeling everyone
Starting point is 01:34:05 always had too like we had this we had our thing but this one's weird yeah yeah i do get that go to go to the blonde that that that one i feel like is up there too what what i'll say about this one That is And I do think is probably weirder It's all very infantilizing Yeah very childlike These are pedophiles There wasn't a lot
Starting point is 01:34:37 At least I remember in video games Or in rap I'm using those examples I don't even know It was actually two adult was the argument for stuff right it was like right this yeah the internet now preys upon girls and uh little kids and pedophiles who like little kids yeah a little too much it's really the pedophiles were the victim yeah they're getting preyed upon uh yeah i mean the the internet is slowly become uh you know we've always been devolving down into to the depths of hell and then there's um i feel like there's you know there's always a
Starting point is 01:35:12 couple people who kind of even things out on like the good side of the internet have you seen um this chick uh bobby with the uneven tits no bobby altair i think is her name name. B-O-B-B-I. She just interviewed Drake. Oh, yes. I didn't know. So she got pregnant and had a baby. I'm pretty sure this is where she at least got her fame. One boob filled up with milk more than the other, like to a very obvious extent. She has like Glenny boobs, like super really super lopsided and she has like a
Starting point is 01:35:47 small frame and they're pretty big so like i think it was just very obvious and i think she went viral initially for being like they don't tell you when you're becoming a mom that you might have like lopsided boobs and she has parlayed that into this tiktok presence and then parlayed the presence the tiktok presence into a podcast where she uh interviews people like it's it's basically two between two firms yeah um episode like three has drake yeah i saw this she had like her friend she had a a rapper then like a somewhat big rapper i think like a medium like mid-level guy and then Drake I think it was in his bed yeah in his house and I just can't
Starting point is 01:36:32 fathom she's really good at like doing like the the deadpan delivery it was like why am I here why are we doing this and everyone's like you they all play along pretty well you invited me so no I didn't, I don't know what you're talking about.
Starting point is 01:36:46 But this notion that like, she, uh, is just a mother of two and, you know, puts her shit on Tik TOK, like every other 20 something girl, like her age,
Starting point is 01:37:00 all of a sudden some weird boob thing happens to her just like totally freak occurrence you are interviewing drake like drake drake i i i i don't really listen to his music much anymore i got a great internet presence he's got his ear to the streets got a great eye of yeah of like comedy of like yep he he obviously he's got some conversation yep this one if he's in there of his ear to the streets of comedy. He obviously does Sunday Conversation. This one, if he's in there... He's always just in general with memes that he then incorporates onto his
Starting point is 01:37:33 show. He puts it on the big screen. He's always commenting. He goes on shows. I'm sure people will say, he's got a team. We'll show him. That's to an extent. But Drake's always had... You could did SNL, you could always tell, like, Drake had – Totally. Comedic jobs.
Starting point is 01:37:48 Like, comedic timing. And, like, you could have a team tell you about Bobby Baltoff, but then you've got to do this interview. And it's not funny if you don't get it. And it is funny, so you know he – And also someone could show you something that is incredibly popular and you go, I don't get it. Yeah. Like, particularly when you get to that level, like, you're like, I don't get it. He's like, no, I get it.
Starting point is 01:38:07 And I'm sure that also means that they're showing him a ton of stuff that he's like, nah, not that one. Yeah, yeah. Yes, that one. Yes, that one. No, not that one. He did this with Caleb too, right? Caleb went to him. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:38:20 So that's pretty sick to be at the level of like, and I'm sure he pays for everything or whatever. But it's, again, like, if you're Bobby's husband or someone in his family, friends, kids, whatever, where it's just like, mom's got to go to Drake's house now. I'm going to do a podcast from his bed. And then also she's got to, like, play her character. Yeah. So she can't be like, oh, my God, this is so crazy. She's got to be play her character yeah so she can't be like oh my god this is so crazy because she's got to be like what the who fucking cares who are you you know the the only clip i saw and i actually would like to watch this whole thing was the non-stop one
Starting point is 01:38:55 yes that that like does she and i guess this is the the genius of the writing like does she know that's a drake song she must because i think that was yeah because like no one calls it a non-stop play yeah it's very it's a weird it's a weird reference yeah she like then for him to pick up on like or something like that and then playing through it like that that was all talking about it was very funny i think it's a very it is like a caleb-esque level of humor they'll still be great together um of like and you never break character and you always i would i would not be able to do it like i i would not be able to be interviewed by her yeah a lot of rick glassman's a comedian who was who was on actually the first time i found her
Starting point is 01:39:35 or no i knew who she was i didn't know she had a podcast and i saw her interview with rick glassman who's like a comedian who raps and like a pretty no-nonsense, no-bullshit guy. And they were arguing with each other. And I didn't know at that point that that was the gimmick. So I was like, I was about to do one Minuteman on it, being like comedian and TikTok podcaster, fight over
Starting point is 01:39:58 blah, blah, blah. And I realized that it's almost as important to have a good co-host or interviewee go along with the shtick. Yeah. Because if you start laughing, it just – I mean, Drake played it absolutely perfectly. Also, I don't – I'm pretty sure that boob thing is why she got popular. If she actually had some other thing, like if there was a reason why, and I didn't know.
Starting point is 01:40:21 I'm sorry. But I noticed. I knew her because she had the lopsided boobs. But yeah, right? Yeah boobs um but yeah right yeah yeah yeah yeah look at that like that one is fucking way bigger than the other one um i mean like way bigger look at that thing look at that thing hanging do they stay like that uh i don't know i mean usually when you have your kid you breastfeed for a little while and then as the kid weans off of it you're you're like your tits know to wean off too like slowly too um but like that girl was probably just living a pretty shitty life two kids and a lopsided boob and then she like probably
Starting point is 01:41:07 doesn't even think to parlay it until you know she just probably this is crazy they don't tell you about this when you have a kid that your tits might go lopsided and then like 100 million views later she's like alright let me try to like let me try this podcast thing and
Starting point is 01:41:23 and everyone does that. Boom, great to be fucking Drake. So like then to have the ability to cut through the noise on that. Yeah, as much, it's funny. We always say a lot like podcasting is kind of like old news and dead and stuff. It's really not. It's mediocre podcasting is gone. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:41:41 If you're really fucking funny, people will tune into your at least you know your video podcast uh i don't know how long like i think these are great clips i could not sit through an hour-long interview even like a 20-minute interview yeah of fake arguing right you know what i mean that's yeah even like between two ferns was always 10 minutes is that an hour and 11 minutes yeah like that is unless she 11 minutes? Yeah. That is. Unless she's really good and you actually are getting information and stuff. Yeah. I'm like, this needs to just be a clip.
Starting point is 01:42:13 But anyway, I think she's also one of these people, the rare occurrence where everybody likes her. Yeah. Everyone's rooting for her. It's like guys are like, she's funny, whatever. She's pretty. Girls like her and don't do the bitchy thing with her. It's like guys are like she's funny, whatever. She's pretty. Girls like her and don't do the bitchy thing with her. And then she just like kills it with the
Starting point is 01:42:29 with the whole shtick. I mean, Drake is fucking. Drake should be a talent manager. That should be his next thing. He should like own a label and it shouldn't be just music. It should be like everything. I think he would have. And then he could put whoever he wants on. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like with that platform, just be like, you're next.
Starting point is 01:42:46 You're next. You're next. So shout out to Bobby Althoff. Althoff. Oh, while we're on the tits, how about that MMA chick who flashed her tits after she won? I saw a headline. I have not seen the— I think it's like one of these, you know, like alternative type.
Starting point is 01:43:05 It wasn't like the UFC. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But just like, Maldivian, you know, fighting braids, pigtailed up, and just like, wow, titties. And I'll tell you what, she's no Jamie. But, you know, for a fighter, sometimes the girls get a little more on the masculine side and it's not as you know conventionally hot or pretty whatever but i feel like a move like that goes one of two ways and it seemed like everybody else was you know like she's kind of on an island like like nobody's, they're just. Well, all right.
Starting point is 01:43:47 What are you supposed to do? Yeah. As a guy, you can't get involved. A cameraman got involved. Put that big screen. Like, the cameraman right away. The cameraman got right in there. Dude, to be a cameraman, you got to be a pervert.
Starting point is 01:44:00 Yeah, totally. Watch the cameraman. Yeah. I'll go with you everywhere. You remember the bread and butter of Barstool for a while, of live covering a game, was hot chicks in the crowd. Yeah. And cameramen always find one.
Starting point is 01:44:19 And then go back to and zoom in on. And I'm like, is this for you, for us? I don't know what's going on here. That was always a creepy thing. I believe in the headline I saw, I think she called it a wardrobe malfunction. I don't know if she did that
Starting point is 01:44:36 tongue-in-cheek, but having now seen the video, I think it was pretty apparent what she was attempting to do. I think the wardrobe worked perfectly fine. It was you tearing the wardrobe off. It functioned just fine. Those are great tits, though. A lot of great tits on the show today. Couple lopsided, couple
Starting point is 01:44:51 perfect, couple big, couple, you know. Today's the boob episode. Take a bite out of summer with HelloFresh from chef-created seasonal recipes to their new fresh and fit summer menu. HelloFresh brings flavor right to your door. Pre-portioned ingredients help cut down on food waste
Starting point is 01:45:08 while step-by-step instructions make cooking a breeze, not a chore. Last night, Sunday night, I was out of my HelloFresh because I ate it all during the week. So last night I had to go to the market to buy food for myself for one single meal. It probably cost more than my entire week of HelloFresh does. I had to call my mom and ask for recipes. It was all a big slog and a pain. HelloFresh, like literally that one night of cooking was so much more stressful.
Starting point is 01:45:36 It was a very good steak, if I have to say. But that one night of cooking was longer, more expensive, more stressful than my entire week of cooking is with HelloFresh. It is peak time for summer produce, and HelloFresh makes sure to get all the best picks all season long. These ingredients travel from farm to your door in less than seven days for quality you can taste. When you need dinner, don't call for delivery. That also takes forever. Think HelloFresh.
Starting point is 01:46:03 They're fast and fresh recipes. I've already talked about those. Go to HelloFresh.com slash KFC50 and use code KFC50 for 50% off plus free shipping. That's HelloFresh.com slash KFC50. Use code KFC50. Get 50% off free shipping plus free shipping. And then lastly, the Finnish Hobby Horse Championship was last week. This is some old school Barstool type shit.
Starting point is 01:46:30 I would have loved to blog this. If you were first to a video of this one where kids, I think, presumably, are using horse sticks. Oh, Dave did this. No, Dave did this about the horse. Dave did the where you run which is light years more difficult than this. This is a fucking kid
Starting point is 01:46:59 just fucking I mean that is and look at that dude that's in like a a fucking hangar that's in like a
Starting point is 01:47:10 conference center like a Javits center bro I think this is a high school auditorium that's a pretty big fucking that is huge I think it's a public
Starting point is 01:47:18 high school basketball arena not where I'm from that is fucking massive and and then they have like a championship like all around the world i watched a video on like how like there was like a trainer being like how to do it like you tip your leg sideways to get over i was like this is a whole
Starting point is 01:47:40 other fucking world man i'm the jumping the height i'm impressed by the rest of this i think i could literally do that yeah like you know i was pretty smooth i'm impressed by that like if it looked like some like ballerina like dance shit or i was like oh that's that's that i mean she's high stepping yeah she's doing the neon yeah but those literally are like the horse toys you used to get as a kid, right? I fucking bully these kids so hard, man. That's the problem, dude. This is the problem with the world. Wasn't even a bully.
Starting point is 01:48:13 If I had a time machine, I'd just go back and bully these kids. Some kids need to be bullied. We let a whole generation go unchecked to the point that there is now an international championship for running around your house with a fake horse. Yeah. Look, I'm not going to say if you put me in a room with one of these, I might not give it a whirl. I might give it a ride. But, like, I'm not doing it in public.
Starting point is 01:48:41 That's the problem. You used to do embarrassing stuff in the privacy of your own home. Yes. And that's it. You wouldn't dare do this shit in front of your friends. You wouldn't invite your friends to your hobby horse championship. You do it at home. You tell your brother and sister.
Starting point is 01:48:55 If you tell anybody about this, I'm going to fucking kick your ass, and that's it. How much – how long has this been going on? Can we get that? Like when was the first – because to get to the point where there's a championship where people come from far and wide means it's had to have been going on for a long ass you know who should really kill themselves is the people who are the judges yeah i'm an adult who's gonna judge a child or at least a teen hobby horse association i'm gonna give them a number grade on their high-stepping with a fucking horse between their legs. 2002?
Starting point is 01:49:29 Bro, you are a pervert. 2002? 2002 is when it was founded, but Hobby Horse grew as a trend. 2002, right when I got to high school. They knew. It grew as a trend, though, in the 19th century, but it didn't really become an official thing until 2002. What the fuck? They were like, all right, he's in high schoolth century, but it didn't really become an official thing until 2002. What the fuck? They were like, all right, he's in high school now.
Starting point is 01:49:47 We can start doing this with the kids again. Because otherwise, he's going to be a fucking terror. And I get, like, if you jump over a high thing, you know, whoever has the highest win. Yeah. But, like, who's judging? At least do that shit at least in a tank top on a track field. I'll still fucking bully you.
Starting point is 01:50:02 Yeah. But not a has-been. I'll still go, still go i was pretty high one of the weirdest fucking internet things for sure uh so it's kind of the good the bad the ugly of the internet today on one minute man um i think that's all i got for for one minute man shit uh there's also been a lot of um a lot of shit right right now on the tv world in the movie world we haven't we haven't done some entertainment talk in a little bit so uh we can get into that uh you and i both watched platonic loved it yeah i liked it you seem to love it loved it i thought i i love
Starting point is 01:50:36 rose burn rose burn great she's good racks me she's great i actually because i like platonic so much and finished it i i went and watched Bridesmaids. I need more Rose Byrne. She's great. Bridesmaids is fucking fine. Dude, the episode when she fucking when she fucking knocks the painting off the wall. Yeah, that was
Starting point is 01:50:58 great. Oh, I bet Kevin masturbates in the bathroom. When she's like, it's not a phrase yeah the other girl was right yeah yeah we know dude she's fucking fun when she was on ketamine and she's like falling everywhere that was some great act like physical acting like just spilling and dragging. It's kind of a unique, like, pioneer-type show because it's about a guy and a girlfriend. I love that there's no sexual tension. Right, like, at the end, there's no, like – and then they realize they loved each other.
Starting point is 01:51:36 Yeah, yeah, yeah. They just, like, awkwardly kind of connect. And, I mean, like, there's, you know, the show Friends and Jerry and Elaine. Like, there is that stuff. But not really. Jerry and Elaine. It's never the focal point of the show. It's always like they once dated or you want them to date.
Starting point is 01:51:55 I don't think people watch platonic going like, oh, I hope they get together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And probably some weirdos. And there aren't any hints that like, oh, they almost kissed. They're platonic friends. And you know what else first of all very realistic script like I felt like a lot of the stuff they were saying
Starting point is 01:52:12 the jokes they were making and the way they were making I was like that's how people talk it's a very hard thing to do in the world of TV because you can't have true conversation because true conversation people interrupt and step on each other and it's a mess. It needs to be talk, talk, talk, talk.
Starting point is 01:52:29 But the way to make a good show but make it seem real, that – like their references and some of the jokes and the way they were talking. I was like that's how people talk, especially amongst girls. I was like that's – like when the two chicks have a night out. I was like that feels like what I think at least girls kind of how they talk it was it was very realistic in that sense and very realistic in the sense of like the whole storyline he i we were friends he got a girlfriend she didn't like me we basically you have to break up right then i came back around after the divorce like that's how guy and girl platonic relationships go all the time where it was like hey like sorry that like we i had to like
Starting point is 01:53:11 ditch you but like my wife hated you or vice versa and that's like but hey like you were right and i'm wrong so let's be friends again like that kind of shit is is it was all rooted in a lot of real realism uh and then the rest i thought was just like good old hijinks. It was like the episode with the painting and a couple other things. Ketamine. And I had no hopes. I was just like,
Starting point is 01:53:38 I haven't heard anything about this really. People were talking about it. Yeah, I'm surprised. Especially with Seth Rogen. I think he just wrapped last week. Oh, is it that? I thought it was older. No, because. Especially with Seth Rogen. I think he just wrapped last week, I think. Oh, is it that? I thought it was older. No, because I started
Starting point is 01:53:46 watching it early July. I watched it July break and I was excited to finish it. I thought it was all out and I think I got to episode eight. Yeah, so like the last two.
Starting point is 01:53:55 No, just. Oh, just. I finished it. Yeah, I just finished it last night too. I do think Seth Rogen got caught up in the political
Starting point is 01:54:03 like liberal, woke, blah, blah, blah shit. So I wonder if that hurt him a little bit. Because I just haven't heard, like, anything about it. Yeah, I don't think Apple TV does a great job promoting their stuff. They don't. They really don't. Yeah, that's a good point. Apple did.
Starting point is 01:54:19 They do have some fucking fire out there. Yeah, Silo. I love Silo. Platonic was good. I love For All Mankind. I love The Morning Show. I love people love Severance. There's a lot of good shows.
Starting point is 01:54:32 Apple did a really good job of getting in that game and doing it pretty well. I think Apple is putting out the best stuff right now. Could be. Could very well be. I finished Severance. Severance took me like three separate tries I forget if we already
Starting point is 01:54:45 talked about it I'll say fast I watched it like took me like three separate times watching episode one and I kept being like I don't really get it it's like very like
Starting point is 01:54:52 sterile and like whatever oh yeah we did talk about because I texted you after work I didn't love Severance did you try it again no
Starting point is 01:54:58 having been in the corporate world now I think you'll like it more because it's almost like more about and maybe you won't like it because you're a sci-fi guy almost like yeah more about and maybe you won't like it because you're a sci-fi guy it's almost more about like what corporate life is like it's almost like part office space yeah like they have to like deal with fucking corporate bullshit and i do hate that
Starting point is 01:55:14 like but like they're making fun of it where it's like if you work really hard you get like a fucking uh chinese finger trap and like yeah that kind of shit um but even i don't like it though there's no denying it's like well-made, well-acted. Everyone else likes it. So I can say it's a good show. Which is exactly how I feel about The Bear. And again, I forget if we talked about this. The Bear, I feel like the world's playing a trick on me.
Starting point is 01:55:39 I feel like The Bear is like the emperor's new clothes. I think a lot of people feel like that who are scared to say it because I tweeted it like the week the bear came out. I'm always that guy. I'll do it with Game of Thrones. I'll say it for people. If you want to say that you don't like the bear – but here's the thing. I didn't even think it's worthy of being afraid of.
Starting point is 01:55:57 I don't think it's like more cooler talk. Oh, yeah. You're just late. It was – when it came –, I did season one live. What episode do people talk about? What moment do they talk about in the show? It's like, this show sucked. You know what?
Starting point is 01:56:13 This show sucks. I'm not going to go that hard. The bear sucks. I didn't like it. It's the same exact thing. It's quality acting. It's just a chaotic fucking restaurant. This show sucks
Starting point is 01:56:25 it can be boring the first season is so anxiety inducing chef, chef, chef, yes chef shut the fuck up this show sucks Clem was like yo did you finish the season 2 finale and I was like brother I don't even know if I made it to the season 1 finale
Starting point is 01:56:42 and he was like oh I thought you were watching it and he was like that was one of the best episodes of television I've ever watched and I was like does the plot radically change at some point because Jesus Christ see I was texting with Dave last night
Starting point is 01:56:58 because Dave tweeted it I tweeted it when I was in the heat of it and everyone was like fuck you I guess because i didn't see it so suck my dick um but ria texted me on the side and i she talked about on the podcast so i'm i think when we first talked about this i did not reveal her name but ria was like thank you so much and so that so um me you ria and dave are all on the same page yeah not that we speak for everybody but that's a pretty good array of the fan base.
Starting point is 01:57:26 And usually we have a lot of people who agree with us. I tweeted it months ago, Paz. I mean, this show. Not months ago, but whenever this show first came out. Sucks. Yeah, I texted Dave last night because Dave had a similar thing. Again, I love Lip. I love...
Starting point is 01:57:42 Oh, what does he say? I'm out on The Bear. The TV show, The Bear. Listen, everybody in my grandmother's like, you gotta watch The Bear. It's a great show. Watch The Bear. Watch The Bear.
Starting point is 01:57:51 I usually like great TV shows. I like what other people like. I'm not some curmudgeon. Like, you know, Game of Thrones, I loved. I loved Breaking Bad. Like, Succession, my favorite show of all time. So I like shows other people like. I'm super excited.
Starting point is 01:58:06 I'm always hunting, looking, pecking for new shows. The Bear, I thought I was missing something. I'm through like five episodes. It's so slow moving, just bored to tears. Like it's just inching along like a worm. Almost reminded me like this old show. I forget. I think HBO, like a therapist show that everyone raved about
Starting point is 01:58:25 it like physically made me sick to watch it it was so slow moving um but everyone's like hey hang in there it's worth the payoff you got to get to episode six season one i guess a little bit happened in episode six seven a slight pickup again people like watch the season finale so they just suck me in suck me in well i finished season one the finale. So they're just sucking me in, sucking me in. Well, I finished season one, the finale. And yes, for the first time in the show, when the show ended, I'm like, oh, I want to watch the next one. Because the last five minutes of season finale, obviously a lot happened. But that's what suckers play. I'm not going to watch eight episodes just so I get five minutes of actual entertainment.
Starting point is 01:59:06 Remind me, that's what White Lotus did. That's what White Lotus did. It's so slow, slow, slow, slow. And then they end it with a bang. It was like, oh, my God. No. Everything. I don't need.
Starting point is 01:59:16 Yeah. All right. Maybe I got guns, bangs, booms, whatever. But I can't have like seven and a half episodes of slowness. The two things that I think we have happened, the slow burn thing, I think it either started or proliferated with True Detective. That was the first time I really heard slow burn thrown around a ton. And something like that kind of is a slow burn. But it's good while it's happening. I also don't think like
Starting point is 01:59:46 things there it was not people took that like everything people took it and it diluted to mean like nothing in a sense in a sense we're like true that was like slow burn where someone is found fucking right away horrifically murdered in episode one episode four whatever there's an eight minute gunfight yeah like you would do this fucking gas yeah there are there are clues it's not like uh breaking bad they see the sloper and bodies fall through the roof in episode two like it's way like that that that's what i mean is that back then i think the bar was like higher and even things like when you said it was slow it wasn't and there was just a different i don't know man i think some of these shows now like people are like rave about or love and i'm like this one
Starting point is 02:00:34 it is it's okay one is is so anxiety i finished it i was i thought it was not great i thought it was fine it was it was you know whatever i i i wasn't like fuck i wish i didn't watch that it was fine It was You know whatever I wasn't like Fuck I wish I didn't watch that It was TV And And then when I saw it Fucking getting The nominations For comedy I was like
Starting point is 02:00:53 On what planet Was that a comedy I hate that And then It's like if it's not Like Death, murder Like love
Starting point is 02:00:59 It just falls into comedy Right It's not It is by no means a comedy And then season two They almost started Leaning into that, like, so they can get comedy again. Like, in season two, there's some fucking eye-rolling comedy, where it's like, I don't know if you've started, but, like, he fucking finds the dust in the ceiling and it all falls on his head, or, like, when they reveal she's pregnant and, like, the wall falls down and,
Starting point is 02:01:22 like, the whole room ponds out. And, like, it's not great. great pass can i have another water please um and the it wasn't whatever i didn't i didn't like it and everyone with me i think when i was texting with dave last night first of all a little offended that i told him i'll be interested to hear your thoughts when you're done i thought that man i got a text i did not get a text i was, man. I was like, when we were just scrolling and I was like, wait, he watched it?
Starting point is 02:01:47 I thought he didn't get to it. Here's your thoughts. I'm such an idiot. Imagine if he just sent you the video. Here's my thoughts. Which I get, like,
Starting point is 02:01:55 that I hate when I'm like, fuck, I gotta go text the person I told him and talked about this. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But the,
Starting point is 02:02:03 we had, by no means, a long conversation, but a longer one than Dave. Dave and I have, like, yeah, yeah. But the, we had by no means a long conversation, but a longer one than Dave. Dave and I have like three conversations a year. We probably exchanged
Starting point is 02:02:10 four texts each. But the, I think when he kept saying episode six, maybe I misremember, I think, and I told him as much, I was like,
Starting point is 02:02:19 I think they're talking about season six, episode two. Because that's what I was told in episode two was season six. Season two was episode six. Because that's the one with like, Mulaney and Bob Odenkirk
Starting point is 02:02:28 and Jamie Reed Curtis. And it's a flashback. And Jon Bernthal in season two, episode six. Of the bear. Yeah. Is, like, the flashback. Yeah, that must be what Clem was talking about, too. Thank you very much.
Starting point is 02:02:39 But that's not the season finale. But, yeah. But, yeah, everyone talked about it as a masterpiece. And that was when I finally bailed. I bailed. I got through half episode 6 and I was like this still isn't doing it for me I think the show's just not for me which again I understand
Starting point is 02:02:52 I can see good actors doing it and I don't know it's just the story doesn't do it for me I thought like White Lotus season 1 I thought was horrible and people were sucking it's dick White Lotus season 2 I thought was better like easier an easier watch and like okay but i you know do you watch euphoria no i don't watch euphoria but
Starting point is 02:03:12 i can understand that it's like it's an amazing show zendaya is an amazing actress the music you can just tell it looks different like it's just like okay that is like a work of art the viewers are through the roof but other than that i just feel like you know it's it's it kind of is what we used to say like it used to be like oh the new netflix show is out and then we got to a point where it was like the new netflix show sucks yeah i mean that's like a lot of things like just whatever's like making a little bit of buzz in the latest world of streaming does not mean it's like that good or you know there's just so much you can't possibly all be that good guys you know we need like a new scale
Starting point is 02:03:48 of sorts where it's like there's you should just be like good shows and bad shows now there's something in between have you watched Sunny? Have you caught up? Actually yeah I haven't caught up on Sunny Sunny is in an interesting spot and I don't mean this in a
Starting point is 02:04:03 I don't mean this as a slight towards them nor towards you because i feel like sunny is like a sketch show almost right now where it's like they're doing skits kind of really they're like like there was that story in the news about the guy cheating in chess like six months ago and Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then people on Reddit were jokingly saying, how could this guy possibly be cheating? And one of the people on Reddit was joking about
Starting point is 02:04:30 maybe this guy put a vibrator in his ass and was buzzing. And that, people wrote headlines like that was like a real thing that happened to the chess, yeah.
Starting point is 02:04:37 I think that was just somebody fucking around. Maybe I'm wrong. Either way, they did an episode on that. That to me feels like the way you guys do it where it's like
Starting point is 02:04:44 something happens in the news and you're like, oh, we should do a skit about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They just do a whole TV show arc about it. But it feels to me more like they've done so much. They've done the characters to death. There's no more to reveal. But that's kind of always what it's been. It's been more about not specific stories but larger ideas like gun control.
Starting point is 02:05:03 Yes, yes, yes. Gang finds a dumpster baby. I'm not saying it in a bad way. I'm saying it's almost like that's the level they've gotten to where it's like just pick any topic and how would the gang approach that? Because the gang is so well established
Starting point is 02:05:17 and so beloved and everybody gets all the jokes so now you can kind of do that for everything. Gang solves the fucking North Korean crisis. Gang solves... What's the one with Israel? Peace in the Middle East or whatever? It's when...
Starting point is 02:05:35 Gang goes jihad. Yeah, gang goes jihad. When the guy's like... He comes into the bar and he's like, yeah, I used to live in Israel, but I had to get my family out of there. I'm like, oh, yeah, well, you got to. And then he leaves and I'm like, what the fuck is going on in Israel? When they're doing like – I'm like talking like that. I'm like, that is so perfect. All of the episodes are like – all of them have moments that I'm like, that was really fucking funny.
Starting point is 02:06:11 I wouldn't say – I don't think there's any episode that I would put up against season three, four, six. Like the really good ones. Season three is the height of any television I think. It's really that. It's up there. We have a dozen thing coming up that – I don up there. We have a dozen thing coming up that... I don't know. We have a dozen thing coming up.
Starting point is 02:06:28 Is that your niche? Season three, Sonny? It was... My niche is all TV. It's all TVs. All TV series. And Jeff was like, I need a season for every...
Starting point is 02:06:41 Is it three? And I just went... I was like, just go three, all of them. Because I don't want to specifically think but also usually it's probably
Starting point is 02:06:48 a good bet though on shows because I think season one you find you're like okay this idea works
Starting point is 02:06:53 yeah and then but like but this character needs a little tweaking season two needs a little
Starting point is 02:06:56 building season two you season one you get your characters season two you kind of
Starting point is 02:07:00 refine them season three you hit your strides season four is great and then you get too popular and kind of start your downswing three, you hit your strides. Season four is great. And then you get too popular and it kind of starts you down swing probably. Right, right.
Starting point is 02:07:07 In Sonny's case, you're halfway. Yeah. And I actually don't think – I think Sonny season eight is one of the best seasons. Well, I still think there's one-off episodes here and there. They're like, that was an all-time great. There's moments still that are – I mean, there's a scene. Charlie's eating nickels in one of them. That actually, that episode is amazing.
Starting point is 02:07:34 Dennis, it's something about like trying to like swim with the big fish. Actually, the most recent season is funny when they're all in Ireland. I thought it was fucking unbelievable. They're doing different things. That was, you know, the dance, the Ireland. These are like, we're going to try to like challenge ourselves almost. The episode with Dennis and everybody trying to impress. Oh, it's the episode with Aaron Paul and Frank Cranston. That's a classic.
Starting point is 02:07:52 Aaron Paul and Frank Cranston are amazing in it. Dennis and Mac trying to impress them, thinking that Aaron Paul is Malcolm in the Middle. The whole episode, they think they're going to meet malcolm in the dad from malcolm in the middle and malcolm and it's actually breaking bad and uh and charlie and they're trying to pitch a new drink called nickel schlager where instead of gold it has nickels in it so charlie is just drinking nickels and he's like oh my stomach and he's puking everywhere and he's like they're like what's wrong with you he's like i've been my stomach. And he's puking everywhere. And he's like, they're like, what's wrong with you?
Starting point is 02:08:25 He's like, I've been puking all day on account of the nickels. And then they're like, why are you drinking nickels? He goes, it's because of my Schlager play. And when he said Schlager play, I was in hysterics. So that one, Max dressed like Michael Jordan from the 90s, like great, great. That's great. The rest of them are like, I can't even judge it.
Starting point is 02:08:49 It's just like you guys are so on another level that the way I judge your episodes is different. They're just so fucking impressive. It really is unbelievable. Also, quickly to wrap up, some other big things going on on TV. Hijack is also Apple TV, I think. Hijack's Apple TV. Hijack's fun.
Starting point is 02:09:06 It's a plain hijack. Yeah. When I first saw a series about a hijack, I was like, that's a movie. Right. Like, you gotta stretch this out. But they're doing good. I love Idris Elba.
Starting point is 02:09:17 Yeah. I think there is some payoff coming. It's like who they are and what's going on and shit. I enjoy it. I got eyes on The Boyfriend. The Boyfriend. Id are and what's going on and shit. I enjoy it. I got eyes on the boyfriend. The boyfriend. The Idris Elba's wife's boyfriend. Oh, the guy looking it up. Yeah. Yeah, I could see that.
Starting point is 02:09:32 I could see that. That's fun. Silo on Apple TV is cool. If you've ever seen Snowpiercer, it's instead of a train, they live in a silo. But it's the same sort of idea. That is very cool. I'm watching a TNT show. It's called The Lazarus Effect.
Starting point is 02:09:51 It's actually a BBC show. No, the other one, Sky. It's at least on TNT, like on demand. I don't know if it's on their regular channel, but it's like a sci-fi idea that there's a government agency
Starting point is 02:10:05 that can turn back time to stop extinction level events from happening. And the idea is like... There's been like six things throughout history that have required them to rewind time.
Starting point is 02:10:21 But you... By the way, that's Indiana Jones. Oh yeah? Then I'm going gonna like it that that that makes sense that sounds awesome i did you like it i haven't seen it yet i like told myself i was i'm gonna go i love that shit i was like i'm gonna go opening day i never do i'm a big indie guy um the first half hour is like watching a cartoon in what sense it's like watching a cartoon. In what sense? It's like it's all CG'd and he's got fucking reverse aging. It's actually pretty good. It's not as bad as it was. He has de-aged enough in real life.
Starting point is 02:10:53 They should have just let him do it. Bro, when they show the cut to real life, which is not 2023, obviously, it's like 19. They just landed on the moon. So 1960 something. Nine. Nine. He's like an old drunk. He's waking up in his fucking Lazy Boy.
Starting point is 02:11:14 Harrison Ford is Jack City. Pass Google. See if you can get the Harrison Ford Indiana Jones shirtless. Because he's also been doing Ripped. 1823 whatever that one is yeah so he's probably been playing a fucking you know you know what is really funny when you go back and look at 80s movie stars it's like it's it's
Starting point is 02:11:38 they're regular ass dudes oh yeah that was in the movie in the documentary bigger faster stronger they talk about that. How, like... You look at Bruce Willis in Die Hard. He's, like, a regular fucking guy. Yeah. The... It's all put, like, old or something like that. It's, like...
Starting point is 02:11:54 He's not de-aged. It's just Harrison Ford now. Wait. So you're saying in the movie he's jacked? Or you're saying this is an old picture? No, I'm saying, like, in the movie he's jacked. Yeah, yeah. Currently, like the new one.
Starting point is 02:12:12 Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you need, like, 2023 Harrison Ford. Yeah. Yeah, I would say he's probably... I bet you he's bigger now than he was then. Because he's probably, like, you know, shooting roids with the rest of these fucks i can't find it but he no but i mean that's yeah he's like 80 isn't he like it's crazy that he
Starting point is 02:12:34 even did the movie remember he broke his leg they needed to like stop shooting he broke bones during the middle of it he does this thing where he's like kind of rolling out of the lazy boy kind of like has like one like arm like this he's those riblets yeah the motherfucker's got obliques yeah that's true it's fucking crazy wild he's and then it's like the first thing that comes back from like the cart again it's not cartoon there's like there's real actors in it uh but it's just it's so cg'd uh but i thought i thought the last hour hour and a half whatever it was great i think it's a slow start? It's not even slow, it's just like, it's so CG. They only made one other,
Starting point is 02:13:09 they made the three. And then one. And then this. I would have thought that the Shia LaBeouf one was like two, maybe three, the way in my mind it's like, oh, they ruined this series. There's one? Yeah.
Starting point is 02:13:23 They didn't do one without him or anything like that? this series. There's one? Yeah. It's like, all right, so they just had one bad episode. They didn't do one without him or anything like that? Mm-mm. I heard Spielberg watch this and said, like,
Starting point is 02:13:31 wow, I thought I was the only one who could do this series. Oh, really? Yeah. Or is it Lucas? Whoever it was. I think it's Spielberg,
Starting point is 02:13:38 yeah. It was like, he nailed it and, like, you know, I thought it was really good. Yeah. I love Mads Mikkelsen, too, who plays the bad guy.
Starting point is 02:13:46 Yeah, he is great. Cool. So that was the movie. Oh, and a lot of this came about because I was talking about Covenant. Covenant is... I got from Dave as well. Dave was raving about it the other day. He was like, this is the best movie I've ever seen.
Starting point is 02:14:06 I was like, what? I've never even heard of this. Jake Gyllenhaal in a Guy Ritchie film about war? I legit don't think I even knew it existed. I knew about it. I haven't gotten to it. I saw commercials or anything. And it bombed.
Starting point is 02:14:22 $55 million budget. $21 million at the box office, and I only watched it because of Dave, and I thought it was fucking great. Like, edge of your seat type of... I think it's probably pretty real. It's about interpreters in Afghanistan and how they get, like, fucked over,
Starting point is 02:14:39 which I think is a real thing. And then the actual gunfights and, you know, getting through the Taliban-infested afghanistan hills are probably maybe not so real i don't know but shit was fire yeah shit was fire and i was trying to think of the best flops ever i didn't know fight club like bomb i saw that fight club bombed apparently like one of the worst all time sh Shawshank only made like $20 million in the box office. A bunch of comedies did like Big Lebowski,
Starting point is 02:15:11 Office Space, but those make sense because those are like the cult classics, you know? I could see Shawshank being like, I don't know, this seems like a depressing ass movie, but fuck that.
Starting point is 02:15:21 But I think all of those made like, broke even, made a million. This is like a $30 million bomb. Unless it somehow kills it in streaming and makes up for it. Nothing's ever done. Yeah, I don't think that's even possible. I would probably put it up there with, like, the best bomb I've ever seen.
Starting point is 02:15:44 Best flop ever. I like watching past Google things so I can just I can just critique in my head that's not how you Google that yeah that's
Starting point is 02:15:49 yeah Google biggest box office flops no these are going to be bad movies it's going to be come on Pat
Starting point is 02:15:54 the best it's going to be the best the best movies of all time that flopped in the box office yeah
Starting point is 02:16:01 it's not yet to work because those are just going to be movies that suck high budget movies that weren't good come on the you had it in the box office. Yeah. It's not yet to work. Because those are just going to be movies that suck. High budget movies that weren't good. Come on.
Starting point is 02:16:07 The last one. But you had it. You had the auto-filling. You didn't fucking take it. Yeah, Babylon was on a lot of lists. I haven't seen that. I haven't seen that.
Starting point is 02:16:16 This is, I think, the exact list I looked at. And if you look at this, it's still a lot of movies that you're like, I don't know what that is. That's a weird one. They're like the Oscar bases.
Starting point is 02:16:24 Yeah. So the fact that it just a kind of an action movie like a good plot is cool you know yeah the uh the uh fucking i saw the tweet that what's it what's the flash that shit bombs it's gonna end with less than Green Lantern. Dude, I could've told you that though. Domestically, I think. This is why people need to fucking Oh, Longshot was a great one. This is why people need to hire me
Starting point is 02:16:55 and us for this shit. Like, I could've told you probably several movies ago that Marvel was cooked. They're just figuring it out now. DC. Okay. Superhero movies.
Starting point is 02:17:11 But I knew there was enough buzz about Doctor Strange that they were going to make that movie. And some of these things you needed to see through. I could have told you that the flash with that fucking goddamn guy who was only in the news because he assaults people or whatever.
Starting point is 02:17:31 I mean, that had no shot. No fucking shot. I was going to see it because there's so much buzz about it. I think we got a pull quote from Tom Cruise being like, it's everything you want in action. Oh, maybe I'm wrong because I didn't hear anything. I was like the fucking – Oh, no.
Starting point is 02:17:47 It had like – it was – A lot of us. Before coming out, yeah, it was like – So did it have a good big weekend and then no – It had a – That's almost the worst. I think it had an acceptable opening weekend but one that was probably like – You get no return.
Starting point is 02:18:01 People are going to get no word of mouth. Yeah. That's almost the worst thing that can happen. I think all the word of mouth was that was incredibly overhyped yeah like not not bad i don't even say it was bad but i think everyone was like because the hype coming into it was like the greatest like again like tom cruise requested to see it his comment was like it's everything you want an action movie which is a pretty benign comment after like you gotta say something when you request to see it yeah and you can't be like
Starting point is 02:18:25 well i wish i didn't waste my time on that yeah um yeah yeah that's true and there was like like the flat i think when because because there was at least internet rumors about just not even putting it out because of everything that yeah whatever they get into uh what's their name fucking ezra miller yeah um and uh they they were like no it's so good it was never even considered not putting it out blah blah blah blah and everyone saw it and was like it's fine it's whatever
Starting point is 02:18:53 maybe and then it's just the worst timing of all because maybe if that was like a few years ago and everyone was like had superhero fever but what are the they have great a great great movie somebody put out an article the other day i think it was igers bob igers quote was like disney uh star wars and we make less and marvel we're gonna make less like thank god yeah like
Starting point is 02:19:22 five years too late because those would be at least like a little more hype if you get like one every couple years or something like that it's just like you just don't feel i don't feel like you have to see any of these anymore no you know i haven't seen any since and it really is just never going to work until you get like the core back you know if you're going to do iron man thor spider-man-Man, Captain America, that's it. The rest are like good spin-off bit characters and shit, not full movies. Okay, boys, we have time. Let's do it.
Starting point is 02:19:52 Hang on. I'm going to pee. Three? Two. Well, three and now we're going to talk. Yeah. I have peed zero times. Now, I could pee right now if I needed to.
Starting point is 02:20:03 I could pee, but now I'm self-conscious about doing it, so I'm going to hold it. I mean, you guys haven't gone fucking three times yet. You're allowed to go. I've gone twice. Huh? I've gone twice. Maybe you got a little bitch boy bladder. Here you go.
Starting point is 02:20:15 I'll just... Wow. Wow. Wow! Wow. That was the most... You were up there doing the lumbada, twiddling around and shit, doing a dance move.
Starting point is 02:20:27 That was like a TikTok. Did you get that? Oh, Danny! Are you recording yourself right now? Why don't you have the camera on you? I do, but I'm not going to... I didn't know I was going to do that. But it still should have been on, right?
Starting point is 02:20:43 It's on. It's on technically, but that's all. I have to go get the stems. That's not going to go in the video. I'm not going to do that. I'm just not going to do it. You're just not going to put it in. My job is not doing it.
Starting point is 02:20:56 Unreal. You're going to do a gang gang video. Okay. You either have to put that video in or do a gang gang video. Honestly, again, the effort, I'll do a gang gang video. Okay. You'll make money from the gang gang video too. So that's worth it. You have to do, you have to do like a full, how long do those girls go for?
Starting point is 02:21:15 Hours. So people stop paying. I don't fully understand what gang gang video is. Yeah, so you got to watch it. You got to figure out exactly what it is. You have to have like followers. Like they're obviously not going to pay you money. Uh, maybe some weirdos will. no they definitely let me watch let me watch like to see what i'm getting myself into they definitely will yeah yeah like it'll be more
Starting point is 02:21:34 like you can just send jackie emojis and do they know do they do they tell you is there like a key yeah yeah for what what they each read like jackie's just refusing to do her job again. She did something funny, and I was like, oh, that'll be funny. She's like, oh, I'm not putting it on the show. It's too much effort.
Starting point is 02:21:52 The camera wasn't on me, so then in order to get the camera, I have to take the stems, and I have to put the whole thing, and I have to upload it. It's a bunch of gigabytes, and then I have to synchronize the audio. It's what her job is.
Starting point is 02:22:03 And she goes, I'm not going to do that. That's just not going to be in the episode. It's what her job is. And she goes, I'm not going to do that. That's just not going to be in the episode. I was like, you leave me with no choice. So she asked to do, I said, you can either put that in the episode, or you can do it with a gang-gang popcorn video. And the whole time we've been talking, the camera's not been on me. It's crazy.
Starting point is 02:22:18 Because she said, she was like, I'm going to pee too. Wait, no, I'm not. Wait, no, I think I am. Wait, no, I'm not. She's like four times. And we're just spinning around in a circle. And then she was just like, no, I'm not going to put that in. Looked me right not she's like four times and she was just like no I'm not gonna put that in look at me right in the eye she goes oh it's just too much work I'm not and I can't do anything I'm powerless I would like to be like what the fuck I just can't she's just
Starting point is 02:22:37 like okay you can put it in yourself if you want it in you. Put it in you. Be my guest. All right. Okay. Play the voicemails. Today's voicemails are brought to you by Pirate Water, which are perfect. The voicemails have been just the craziest, most random thoughts of our fan base for almost 11 years now. And I think they've ramped up with the Pirate Water. Yes, right now we're doing our weekly contest, and they really have been on another level since we announced it.
Starting point is 02:23:11 Every week we will pick one voicemail as the voicemail of the week to get a Pirate Water merch care package, which means all sorts of weird Pirate Water stuff that you get a whole treasure chest full of booty, Pirate Water style, based on whoever delivers the funniest question or the best fun fact or storytelling, whatever it may be, the best voicemails get only the best in Pirate Water and the merch care package. So make sure you go to the kfc radio uh social media to submit your videos make sure you bring the heat tell your best story leave your best message and you can win that care package along with uh going to bars going to
Starting point is 02:23:58 drinkpiratewater.com to find a location near you or to order it directly to your house there's four different flavors. You can see them here. You got the orange, green, yellow, and red, which is Sex on the Beach, Margarita, Bahama Mama, and Miami Vice. $2, 10% alcohol by volume. It's the drink of the summer. Young people are drinking it when they party.
Starting point is 02:24:22 Older people are drinking it when they want to get loose. It's all around a smash hit from the world of kc radio through the plan bry universe pirate water is everywhere this summer so go to drinkpiratewater.com to find pirate water in a location near you or order on gopuff winners of the best voicemail get the care package okay i have two things first First one wasn't going to say, but then I could really use some pirate water. Um, Kevin, you broke up my engagement and I just want to say, like, I play the podcast around the house. Obviously we live together. Um, everything was great. We went to Europe. Uh, and then you're always preaching. Hey, why get married in yours? I'm 24. He's 27. And every message is like, you're an idiot.
Starting point is 02:25:09 Don't get married in your 20s. That's terrible. So guess what? I'm not getting married in my 20s. He broke up with me five days before my dress came in. So if you could also manifest someone buying my dress would be incredible second thing you guys were talking on the podcast um the other day about like jackie was mentioning how women are more emotional and like fighting and stuff and i read harvard paper that was recently published and they like have not been doing uh neurology research on female mice because they were nervous.
Starting point is 02:25:48 All the hormones and everything were going to mess up the research. Big thing in research as a whole. And then this study just came out and they're like, actually, female mice brains are more stable in a certain space than male mice. And we should have just been studying them all along if you're gonna pick one gender or the other and also men's hormonal cycle is 24 hours 24 hours women are so predictable you know what time of the month is our time of the month and we're going to be a mess men you change throughout the day 24 hours all day you get so angry that's just wait miss me with that okay a lot to undress first of all back here happy with where that went yeah i was like oh i'm going back to screening these
Starting point is 02:26:38 we've been on a hot streak where everyone i just picked is good, but going back to screen enemies. Oh my god. I didn't know. I was like, where is it? Was there any part of you that was like, hmm? Because let me tell you who would have that part of them. I don't think so. You look like my touch.
Starting point is 02:27:04 If there is a girl That I would've fucked while she was married It would look like you It would look like you Imagine if she was like Yeah so Kevin Like you You broke up my engagement
Starting point is 02:27:16 Like You fucked me And I was I didn't tell you But I was engaged And he found out And And I'm pregnant, by the way.
Starting point is 02:27:27 There was no – I've never fucked anybody who was married. So I know – there was no part of me like that. But there was a part of me that was like, did we DM or sex or something? Because, again, you look like that person. I mean – Yes. How about that? Yes. You look like that person who – Well, I mean – Well, I mean – Yes. How about that?
Starting point is 02:27:49 Yes. You fucking prude. My god. You are audacious. Bro, I mean when I get Jonah Hill, it's going to be – Not for like controlling shit like that. Just for like Jesus Christ. I think that's been made officially illegal enough that people aren't doing that, right?
Starting point is 02:28:08 These days. I don't know about text. Pics. You're splashing pickies? All of that shit. Pics! I know that the texts aren't, but I feel like it's kind of become like a package thing where at least like – at least everybody sort of shames the person too. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 02:28:27 You know? Like there's at least enough of a – there was a moment there during time where everybody who did that kind of got like praised, you know? And I think a lot of times people are just like, that's fucked up, you know? Yeah. Anyway, six hot. I didn't bring over marriage. Whatever. I mean, you're welcome.'s 24 that's crazy yeah like
Starting point is 02:28:50 when i say don't get married in your 20s it's usually like 29 that i'm talking about it's definitely for 24 he's 27 that's kind of in that range of like you're i think you're crazy and you're young but it's not like you should get should get married if you're 24, if you live in a swing state. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, maybe, you know, I don't know your life. Sometimes it does make sense. We're just like, I live in this little one stoplight town, and this is all I have, whatever.
Starting point is 02:29:19 But I don't know. It's not an only thing. It's going to be fine. But this also means that she probably was engaged for a little while she probably got like engaged like 23 yeah that's fucking nuts that's probably the guy if you're gonna have your bachelor party like a senior frogs yeah come on dude if i was 27 i think if you're like 27 and up and you're engaged like a 23 year old that's almost like on you to be like you're too young like don't do this you know i mean like you're engaged to like a 23-year-old, that's almost like on you to be like,
Starting point is 02:29:45 you're too young. Like, don't do this. You know what I mean? You're like controlling. That's like weird. I don't know. I'd be like, you need to live a little more before. Even if I do want to marry you,
Starting point is 02:29:55 that's fucking bizarre. By the way, speaking of bachelorette parties real quick, the most, I don't know if it's feminist or misogynistic thing. I just remember my mom was in Amsterdam. It's a KC radio. Coin flip. We saw a bachelorette party.
Starting point is 02:30:10 And she goes, God, so fucking lame. And I was like, it's just like, it's just a bachelorette party. It's like, guys do it too. She's like, guys can do it. They're fucking idiots. Women shouldn't do this shit. It's so true though it's like you know and you know what i i actually i i think it's official i think it's been coming for a long time and it it it my uh inspiration for this was the dog walk the other day they were doing something on
Starting point is 02:30:40 bachelor parties and the clip was those guys just being like i just want to like hang out with my buddies and play pool basketball yeah i think it's official put it in the books that it's just about like hanging out with the dudes and i think that's an age thing and i i actually i think if you're excited about your bachelor party, you shouldn't get married. I think that's a better thing than age. I think you should get married if you're kind of dreading your bachelor party. Like, oh, fuck. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:31:16 They've always said it's for the other guy. That guy who's on it is either married for a long time or not married. Yes. I can definitely see that. I'm just saying that, like like I think there was a time – I remember writing blogs being like this stupid fucking like we're going to play capture the flag and we're going to like paintball. Like the pendulum was like we're going to like fuck hookers and do blow. And then the pendulum went so far the other way that I was like let's get back to like partying and like regular shit because i don't want to like play these like wacky zany games and activities and shit and i think we finally settled in the middle where it's like i want to just go somewhere where everyone can like sit in a pool or at a bar at a table could just be in a fucking field for all I care and just come up with the inside jokes and the clowning.
Starting point is 02:32:08 It's almost like the activities that you do are only to put yourselves in position where jokes can occur and funny things can happen and you can come up with these memories. I said my favorite part of the bachelor party these days is the text chain or email chain that might come out of it because it's like you you know the the shit that you're talking about for weeks to come afterwards i think that most people have settled on i just want to hang out with the dudes and that might be an age thing because it's so infrequent i remember my dad
Starting point is 02:32:38 was my uncle's best man and like planned his bachelor party my uncle got married later in life and they just went to the vineyard. We had a house out there at the time and just stayed at our house and went shark fishing. I was like, this is the lamest fucking thing. And now I'm like, dude, that would be so dope.
Starting point is 02:32:54 But you think that even, I guess, yeah, I guess young guys are still looking to party and all that shit. But I think that, I think every age at this point might know that it's all about the hang and not the club or the girls or the drugs or whatever. It's just – I mean you always come out of it with like this guy has got a new nickname and this guy got a whole new story.
Starting point is 02:33:22 And like remember this, remember that. That is the point of bachelor parties. And probably always has been. But we just kind of got lost in it. Maybe you're right. Maybe you don't realize that until you're older. But I think the sooner you realize that and execute that, the better. That's what the bachelor party is about.
Starting point is 02:33:38 Anyway. Buy this girl's dress. I'll buy your dress. The cost approved like uh pending approval of the cost are you serious oh okay i'm like what i had some thinking through this i'm like that'd be funny the what would i do with like a how much does the dress call like two grand they well that's the thing they can range from like you know two grand to like 20 grand you know so i'm like well that's what i was thinking that's what i was thinking if like i need to find some way to justify a couple thousand dollars worth of value yeah
Starting point is 02:34:14 i've got some money to play with not like that kind of money finally make this night office nice just have a dress maybe maybe i'll buy that is how you make cool shit you just acquire random things i will maybe i'll buy my couches on fucking maybe i'll buy the dress and make jackie wear it while she does gang gang videos um all that shit she said about female mice i don't know shut up bitch oh oh yeah i forgot about that that actually that it's kind of funny to me that wait if we're taking her at face value that scientists were like we can't even use female mice they're so fucking quick chicks are so fucking crazy we're not even gonna look at female mice brains it's actually the perfect example of how men and women interact
Starting point is 02:34:59 where because most scientists are going to be men at least still i think it's changing probably changing a little bit but i think a majority of scientists i would venture to guess the men who like we can't fucking use female mice the people who the scientists who can't use female mice are men yeah but that's the perfect like explanation of how men and women interact where it's like we can't we can't fucking do that and then you do it like oh it's totally normal it's fine absolutely fine we should have been doing this the whole time like i can't i can't i can't she can't find out about that and then like oh she doesn't care it's good like that is the the worry that we can't interact with women
Starting point is 02:35:41 far great far outweighs when it's like oh wait never mind she's just normal i will say to like to answer her point though like it's the eye test what you're just gonna tell me that guys are crazier than girls it's just not true come on we just know it's not true and i and and about the hormones guys are on it like all the time and girls you know listen even girls know this i see girls complaining about all the time it's like you have your your pre-week and then you have the week of and then the next week you're like recovering from it and then it starts all over again you bitches are on some sort of level with your period where you're annoying about it 30 days a month i was gonna say i don't know this is an argument for
Starting point is 02:36:22 or against that i really don't but like never and i think i've said this before never once in my life have i interacted with a woman and been like she's on her period right now like i can never ever tell i don't know if that's my idiocy or if that's like i've i for sure have have i've done that i i could be the people i deal with are usually always volatile i think it's one thing if you're if you're like like there are assholes like we're on your period it's like no i'm just like calling you out and like cheating on me yeah it's like something like very justified like what do you want your period it's more like there are times where like i i've been in in like a conversation
Starting point is 02:37:00 or something where like all of a sudden it's intensely emotional and like crying and i'm like it's usually when i'm like how the fuck is this that big of a deal right now and then the man i'm so sorry i'm here i'm like oh okay there it is i i don't realize it in the moment but usually i'm like oh yeah that for sure tracks well i was i was dating this girl and i was like at dinner she's like what's wrong i was like I don't know I'm just like feeling really like I'm just like down today She's like oh it's probably because I'm on my period And it rubs off on guys
Starting point is 02:37:32 Like if you spend enough time together Your cycles sink And the guy This is not true She was just like For like months I believe That like when she got her period My
Starting point is 02:37:40 You don't You don't have a cycle Yeah It's true for girls It's not true for No it's cycle it's true for girls it's not true for guys it's true for guys but not that you're not cycling up it's that your girlfriend's being a bitch
Starting point is 02:37:53 and you're fighting I was so naive that I blamed it her hormones rubbed off you could say that John rubs off on people let's be happy and then they want to kill themselves in six months. Yeah, your crankiness coincides with my crankiness because I purposely make your life a mess.
Starting point is 02:38:14 But you don't have any sort of cycle going on, bro. I was fully convinced it was scientific. I was like, that makes sense. I was like, though, my girlfriend, I'm in a bad mood today. She's in a bad mood, I'm in a bad mood today she's in a bad mood I'm in a bad mood yeah like fucking solidarity man no
Starting point is 02:38:33 she just put you in a bad mood what's up everyone so I was listening to an episode from weeks or months ago about something about someone breaking their dick
Starting point is 02:38:43 or you know they're kind of talking about how does it happen or something and essentially the same thing happened to me when i was like 16 or 17 um i was having sex and essentially the person backed up and i went forward and immediately my um dick like hit the edge and just like broke the tip of my dick and it was blood everywhere and like your dick gets super small because obviously you lose all the blood right away and i was too afraid to essentially go to the doctor or anything because i just didn't really know what to expect of what would happen in
Starting point is 02:39:14 terms of my parents finding out or anyone else and so i for the next two months i essentially just stuffed paper towels into my pants when i would go to school um because it would bleed like all the time for the most part um and even the point was again with the person and while they were going down on me i like started bleeding again like in their mouth so it was a whole ordeal and then during a basketball game i was wearing white shorts and in the middle of the game i started bleeding and to come up with an excuse because people started noticing these things and hearing the story was that I said that my dick got caught on my zipper in my pants. And then my pants zipper got stuck in the garage door. And when the garage door went off or went up, it broke the tip of my dick. So my question is what's the stupidest excuse or story you've come up with?
Starting point is 02:40:00 You said something about a garage door? Yeah, when it got stuck in the garage door and when the garage door went off or went up. Go back again. And to come up with an excuse, because people started noticing these things and hearing the story, was that I said that my dick got caught on my zipper in my pants,
Starting point is 02:40:12 and then the pants zipper got stuck on the garage door, and when the garage door went off, it went up and broke the tip of my dick. So my question is, what's the stupidest excuse or story you've come up with something that either didn't need to be said? That's the stupidest excuse I've ever heard come up with something that either didn't need to be said or that's the stupidest excuse
Starting point is 02:40:27 I've ever heard in my life. So let me know. Bro, bro, bro. Wrote a cartoon in his head. Your pants zipper got caught in the garage door. So I think I caught my zipper and my pants got caught
Starting point is 02:40:41 in the garage door. Next thing you know, I'm hanging over the fucking car. What are you talking about? The zipper would have been enough. You could have just said I got caught in the zipper door. Next thing you know, I'm hanging over the fucking car. What are you talking about? The zipper would have been enough. You could have just said I got caught in the zipper. You understand that best lies are based in realism, right? I'm hanging from the door.
Starting point is 02:40:52 Not Rick and Morty episodes. What the fuck are you talking about? By the way, quick joke. That guy wouldn't be allowed to play high school basketball in Texas. This chick's kicking our ass First of all Breaking your dick Is one of the few things That really makes me go like
Starting point is 02:41:13 Yeah It hurts my body Having that happen at 16, 17 Is like That like ruined that guy Like I wouldn't If you told me that That guy like abuses that that that that like ruined that guy like like i wouldn't if you told me that that guy like abuses people i'd be like well you know he you know he went through this traumatic experience at such a young age i was thinking about that at the other day i forget why like we don't recognize i think enough that the most powerful people in the world at least in the future
Starting point is 02:41:46 are children like I was thinking of when I raised my hand once in elementary school and someone was like that was so dumb and I was like I was like okay I'll never raise my hand again and like
Starting point is 02:42:02 that's that that altered the complete trajectory of my life I never raise my hand again. That's that. That altered the complete trajectory of my life. Yes, yes. I never asked the question again. I never made it known that I didn't completely understand something. Yep. I could have been a much smarter, different person if one person, one time. Just didn't say that to you.
Starting point is 02:42:18 It completely changed who I was. Dude, I had a screaming match with Keegan this weekend about drawing a strawberry. We do this thing, you watch a YouTube video and you draw along with it. And Shay is really good at it,
Starting point is 02:42:38 a couple years ahead of him, and he was struggling right off the bat. And he was like, fuck this. I'm not doing this. I'm not. I I hate it I'm bad at it it's not working and I was like come on like you gotta do it you gotta do it and he wouldn't do it and I started like
Starting point is 02:42:54 giving him examples I was like you know the first time you did martial arts you left and you said I'm never doing that again I hate it I'm not good at it and now look at you you're breaking boards and all that and he goes scream to your streaming I'm good at martial arts I'm not good at it and now look at you you're breaking boards and all that he goes scream to your streaming he's like i'm good at martial arts i'm not good at drawing strawberries and i am screaming at him i'm like we're doing another one i was like i don't care like it's you you can do it you have to believe in yourself and we're drawing a strawberry
Starting point is 02:43:23 and he's like no i can't do it, Dad. I'm literally screaming at each other like two dudes would, not like a father and son. I'm just like, if you're going to give up on things, I was like, this is an important moment in your life. I was like, you're so hard on yourself and you want to give up on things. I can't draw a strawberry. And then he couldn't do it. He got through the first step and was like okay I'm good at this I like this
Starting point is 02:43:48 you fucking asshole so now I have I sat them both down and I was like we have a code word now it's called strawberries and I'm like next time you're afraid to go up to the plate next time you're afraid to do the balance beam you have a
Starting point is 02:44:04 presentation at school like whatever you're gonna do it you're gonna to do the balance beam you have a presentation at school like whatever you're gonna do it you're gonna be fine i'm gonna tell you strawberries and and i'm and i'm like because who fucking knows if you have a moment like that like your life is you could just be like i'm never all right i'm never drawing the strawberry i'm never gonna try anything ever again and i was like how do, how do you stop that? How do you parent that? There's going to be a million of those instances. Yeah, it's impossible because some kid is going to be able to be like, you're bad at that.
Starting point is 02:44:35 And you go, okay, never going to. Why would I ever do that? I could be a fucking horse girl right now. I could be fucking. Yeah. Crazy. The butterfly effect. It was literally like i'd never asked the question ever again ever again and then and then fucking 25 years later i'm tweeting out hey why is it called
Starting point is 02:44:55 a d-bag i learned how to use my stupidity i didn't get any smarter i learned how to use my stupidity. I didn't get any smarter. I learned how to use the stupidity. I harness my stupidity for good. For good. But like if I didn't figure out how to work with my stupidity. You'd be in a ditch. You'd be in a gutter. I'd be like – I don't know. I just never ask the question. You actually are the – like I used to say Dave is the dumbest man, the dumbest millionaire of all time.
Starting point is 02:45:24 You might be the most successful dumb person ever in that regard. Your level of stupidity. Never. It's not stupidity. It's your level of like that kind of shit. It's just like, I don't know. I'm just never going to try or say anything ever again. And but like, look where you are.
Starting point is 02:45:42 Most people like that end up like shooting up the school. You're fucking just hanging out here. You know, be worse our last voicemail by the way dude just for the record as dumb as i was and continue to be if my dick bled for three weeks oh i would talk to somebody we didn't even finish the question. Yo, that is so, that was so perfect. When you are 16, 17, 15, in that range, when you're so afraid of just telling your parents things, that you would let your dick bleed for days on end. Like, bro, just tell your parents that you lost your virginity
Starting point is 02:46:21 and it didn't go well, and they'll help you from stopping your dick bleeding out all day, every day. Changing your shorts at halftime because your dick's bleeding through our hoops. Your parents have been running through the bounty rolls at home. They're like, what the hell is going on? You're like, why is there no more paper towel? You're fucking wrapping that shit up like a mummy. I'm somebody who has wrapped their dick in paper towels before
Starting point is 02:46:44 because they were scared to tell their parents that their dick was bleeding. It was a zipper situation. Didn't get caught in the garage door. Didn't get caught in the zipper. Didn't get lifted off the ground by the garage door. And it was. I did give it a wrap. It was actually made with paper towels.
Starting point is 02:46:59 Toilet paper, not paper towels. You caught the shaft or the ball? Shaft. Right at the base, I, the bat wing of it. Oh, on the underside. Yeah. I think I was, like, just pulling it out. Was your dick up?
Starting point is 02:47:14 I don't know. Now that I say it, I don't understand how it even happened. But, like. Must be doing the waistband tuck sort of thing. Yeah, maybe that. I don't know. I don't know why. Zipping up your pants with a boner.
Starting point is 02:47:24 Because I don't take the whole thing out. Actually, my buddy the other day for the first time told me. I love how you... He takes the whole thing out. Dicking balls?
Starting point is 02:47:30 Yeah. Through the zipper? Yeah, when he takes a piss. Yeah, some people do that. No, I just... I think you have to have a bigger dick for that. Really?
Starting point is 02:47:37 If I were to put my balls out with my dick, it would be... It would be... He said that like a puppy dog going, like, really? If I had balls in the way of my dick,
Starting point is 02:47:58 I don't think the pee would be an easy situation. Because my dick would be almost propped up by my balls a little bit, you know? So when I take my dicky balls out of my... I totally do that too. When I have... I totally do that too Don't you think
Starting point is 02:48:30 It's a good thing I'm in a good mood Don't you think though You know what I'm saying It would almost like It would be like pointed up almost Yeah Or even if you have that hand over It would be like
Starting point is 02:48:42 I'd have to push it down To get into the toilet To go with the stupidity, I might have just tried to zip it up while it was still out. That's not on the problem. Yeah, yeah,
Starting point is 02:48:49 that actually makes sense because you, yeah, that knew at the bottom of it. The... But imagine your, dude, your dick bleeding.
Starting point is 02:48:57 First of all, wearing white shorts is a little suspect. You ever wear white shorts to play ball? I never wore white shorts. I think, I pictured that he was...
Starting point is 02:49:03 A uniform? Yeah, but also, I don't think it's was a uniform yeah but also I don't think it's crazy to wear white shorts I don't think I've ever played in basketball but like it's a little weird
Starting point is 02:49:09 I guess uniforms are but I never wore like white whatever anyway if you're playing ball and you're just like all of a sudden like
Starting point is 02:49:18 and it's like seeping into your shorts that's a lot of fucking blood that's a problem that's not like oh shit something uncomfortable you look and there's like a little bit it's like if you need to change your shorts because of blood i'm surprised you're not like passing out that's a catastrophe and obviously this happened like for months like it wasn't just like that week right like it kept going on like he broke his dick having sex and then many things after that where he just constantly bled out of the dick
Starting point is 02:49:46 no we have one more voicemail you have to sit through this one you have to sit through this we'll play it we'll end the blood talk. I can't believe this. I have a question for you here. What is one of the funniest or weirdest drunk tells that somebody you know has? I mean, I would say when John has to piss every 45 seconds, but he doesn't when he's
Starting point is 02:50:17 sober. One, two, three, seven, eight, too many bourbons. He will really drive down everyone's throat how much soul Chris Stapleton has. Most of the time, my parents will be talking, drinking, playing games, whatever. Music's almost always on in the background. More times than not, a Chris Stapleton Pandora station.
Starting point is 02:50:37 And the music will suddenly get louder, and my dad will tell everybody to be quiet and just listen to him sing and say how much soul he has in me. He'll get it like, God, man, he's got soul. He'll get into it. So, yeah, that's his tell. Anything crazy that anybody you know has like that? Mine's not crazy. It's also my dad.
Starting point is 02:51:03 My dad, no, seriously. My dad says no, seriously. My dad says no, seriously. All the time. Yeah. But like – I remember just like driving him home from games and stuff. It was like when I was 16. When he was drunk.
Starting point is 02:51:14 That was the designated drive where he'd have a few beers. Oh, I thought you meant your games for some reason. First thing I thought of was like – You go to the Pat's Brew and shit like that. And it's just like just everything. Because when someone's drunk and you're sober, you're kind of like, ha, ha, ha. You give them a courtesy laugh. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 02:51:33 No, seriously. No, seriously. Yeah, I see. He's a big no seriously guy. I try not to call people on that though because I know that I do those things. Not even drunk. I just find these crutches i the other day i said apparently i might in a one minute video like seven times because i you know you do it like i do it and delete it and then splice it and i'm like oh i didn't realize
Starting point is 02:51:55 i said it both those times so i'll just say it back to back but i said apparently that's my way of like introducing part of the news you know i'll be like so apparently like she shot him in the head right and then the next slide is like apparently she was you know not even the nanny it was blah blah and apparently apparently shut the fuck up man so i try to just like let people slide on that stuff there's a lot of my friends have a lot of physical drunk tells like i'm like oh you're drunk your eyes you're gone yeah like eyes, you're gone. Like, you're – Mine and my eyes. Text and eyes. When John looks at his phone like this close.
Starting point is 02:52:28 When you hear this from Jackie. Oh, yeah. Or when she snorts like a dragon. But that's a funny one, though. Like, when you know. It's like, oh, here we go. We're going to get, like, a dissertation on whatever. That's a like a dissertation whatever yeah like the stapleton's on dad's drunk i got a buddy talking about his moving to costa rica oh i well it's again these aren't drunk things they're just my asshole friends like i
Starting point is 02:52:56 got a friend who just forever constantly said i'm gonna learn mandarin and move to china and then he would like go get rosetta stone i'm doing it i'm doing it and then he just all he knows how to say is like nihao nihao we should whoa shirley mao it's like you love one fucking sentence in mandarin get out of here um but yeah that's a good one i bet there's a lot of funny ones we can have everybody tweet we can crowdsource that one what's your what's your the funniest drunk tell that you or someone else you know has because there's I bet there's a lot of those out there.
Starting point is 02:53:28 All right. No interview today. John's going to go pee. I'm going to do more cocaine. Right now the leader in the clubhouse is probably dick guy. Dress girl.
Starting point is 02:53:36 Oh, best. Oh, dress girl. Come on. She's got the sympathy factor. No, but also that's just the memory. I mean, that was if you're going to remember
Starting point is 02:53:44 a voicemail from that the hot girl breaking up the marriage. Yeah. No, but also that's just the memory. I mean, that was – if you're going to remember a voicemail from that, the hot girl breaking up the marriage. Yeah. Actually, the question itself or the actual voicemail itself kind of sucked though. I think it's a toss-up. We have two in the running right now. Send in your voicemails. Case Pirate Water, merch, the whole shebang. I believe it comes in a little bit of a chest.
Starting point is 02:53:59 We should leave that up to a vote every year, every episode. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Unless there's like – we can make the executive decision, but we'll just put up a three-person poll and the people vote. Yeah, there'll be a poll. I think they both get on the poll. Whoever gets the voicemail of the week gets the Pirate Water merch and care package sent to them. So send your voicemails in. If you go to the KFC Radio social media, there will be a link where you can submit your video.
Starting point is 02:54:25 You can either show your face, not show your face. It doesn't matter. Our tickets are available as well. Tickets for right now in November and a couple things in the fall. And there's a store. There's a sale in the store coming up. No, it's August 1st. Okay.
Starting point is 02:54:41 Well, we've got a sale in the store coming up in August. Watch Out of Order tomorrow night if you're listening to this on Tuesday. Episode 5. Very funny stuff. It's Barbie Oppenheimer
Starting point is 02:54:52 Out of Order week. This one, I feel like you're covered in blood. You're... This one has a lot of costumes. A lot of costumes. Yeah, yeah. Costumes that I was like
Starting point is 02:55:01 I couldn't even tell who's who. You don't even know the judge one i don't know any of like anything yeah i just i just think owen just sends me like un un like no description no nothing no context pictures that i'm just like whoa i don't know what's going on so i'm excited to watch it so out of order order, go to the Barstool Comedy YouTube. Make sure you subscribe to that.
Starting point is 02:55:27 Follow Barstool Comedy Network on all social media. And we'll see you guys on Thursday. you you you you you

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