Khloé in Wonder Land - Dream Analysis Expert

Episode Date: March 25, 2026

Dreams can feel random... but what if they’re not? Khloé explores how dreams reflect what we’re going through emotionally, mentally, and even in our relationships. With insight from dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg, this episode unpacks the deeper meaning behind common dreams and why they might be showing up in your life.Episode Sponsors:Shop at https://www.REVOLVE.com/KHLOE and use code KHLOE for 15% off your first order. #REVOLVEpartnerCustomize your Chai, your way at Starbucks.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Let's talk about the five things we all dream about the most. These are five stress dreams that you should never ignore. If you've ever dreamed about your ex or dreamed your partner was cheating or dreamed you had a baby, I will tell you what these all mean. You're welcome. How did you get into dream analysis and psychology? Most of my life, I've been able to remember just about every single dream. I have every single night.

That's like unheard of. I can't tell you the last time I remember a dream. They are your built-in, brutally honest best friend. who's going to tell you what you need to know whether you like it or not. Do you lose a dream lot? I do. And do you like that? It's better than sex.

Why do we have nightmares? I know people that climax in a sex room. So what is that department? I don't even know how to say it. You say you're more of a light sleeper? Oh, if a feather falls. I'm like... So I created this portrait for you.

It's a thank you. It's here somewhere. Oh my God, this is so much hotter than I could ever be. I need these boobs. That is you. I wish you are me. True will be so happy. Lori, thank you for being here on Chloe and Wonderland.

I'm so excited to sit and talk with you. I'm excited to talk with you too. I found you on social media and I just think you are so fascinating and so interesting. But I want to know how did you get into dream analysis and psychology? Well, I've always been a vivid dreamer. And I have been able to remember my dream since I was two years. old. That is incredible to me. So long story short, I've always been into my dreams. And when I was little, I would draw them. When I got a little older, I would journal them. But it wasn't until I was

19 when my grandfather died. So I had a dream two weeks after his death that we were walking arm and arm through this museum. And I knew he had died. And I asked him, what is it like where you are? And he said, well, I can't tell you that. But what I can tell you, is that it's secure. Oh. And then he gave me a hug. And as I watched him walk up the stairs, I began to wake up and I could smell his old spice. I love that.

And I could feel him. And I was like, what just happened? What was that? So that's the dream that propelled me to study dream psychology. Because I wanted to know, why do we do it? Right. What is the purpose? What does it mean?

And I was so impressed by how practical the dream. the dreaming mind actually is. As ethereal or otherworldly as it can seem or bizarre, it's actually very, very practical, helpful, and powerful. And what do you mean by the practicality part? Like if I'm dreaming that I'm surrounded by fairies or something more whimsical, how is that considered practical? Well, very good question. Because dreams are mostly symbolic. Okay. So they say, seem random, bizarre nonsense. Fantasy. Right. When actually they're not. The thing about dreams that most people don't understand is that dreaming is a thinking process. Your dreams are your thoughts. They are a continuation of your thoughts stream from the day. So whatever you're saying to yourself

throughout the day, you're driving around, you know, oh, Chloe this, you're loading the dishwasher, oh, Chloe that, you're taking a shower, you're talking to yourself. As you drift off, you're still talking to yourself. That stream of consciousness continues. But once you enter REM dream sleep, your brain's working differently. The biochemical processes are a little different. So you're still having that conversation with yourself. But now, rather than thinking in words and linearly, like you and I are right now,

you're thinking in symbols, emotions, and metaphors. So look at your dreams as a very wise commentary on what happened today. Look at your dreams as helping you problem solve and reach your aspirations. You just have to learn the language. I used to dream. And I think I had one dream that I remember recently that was more of a nightmare. I didn't wake up from it. But when I did wake up in the morning naturally, I was like, oh, I didn't like that dream.

I can't tell you truly the last time I remember a dream. I know that doesn't mean I didn't dream. Right. And I've wondered, why don't I dream anymore? And I used to journal a lot, not about my dreams, but just journal in general. And I've read that if I do have a dream, because you said you've been journaling and drawing from a very young age about your dreams, the more you do that, the more your brain starts to dream or you start to remember them more. Yeah. Here's what you do to start remembering your dreams, because you are dreaming every night. Every 90 minutes, we dream. Even if I don't remember. Even if you're not remembering it.

Okay. And it's unfortunately something that is so powerful and helpful to us is so slippery. Right. It's not fair. Right. But you are dreaming every single night, whether you remember it or not. And the way to remember them is actually very, very easy. All you have to do when you wake up in the morning, don't move.

Okay. Stay in the exact same position you woke up in because that's the position your body was in when you were dreaming. So if you roll over, if you move, look at your phone or whatever, it's like, I'm, plugging yourself from the dream you were just in. So just stay put, quiet your mind, and give yourself three to five minutes of quiet still time to let the dream come back to you. Then write it down. Otherwise, it'll be gone after breakfast. That's crazy.

I know. But the more you do that, do you think it makes you dream more vividly or remember your dreams more? You'll remember them more. Okay. It's like, you know, working out. Right. The more you work, the muscle, the stronger it gets. exact same thing with your dream muscle. The more you work it, the more you pay attention to it,

make it a part of your life, make it a partner in your life. Your subconscious is your partner in life and can really make big changes for you if you work with it. So you just incorporate it into your morning and you'll start remembering them every morning. I have also read that in your dream, and I hope I'm saying this right, like if you can find your hands, you can control your dream a little more? Okay. Yeah. What is that? All right. So lucid dreaming. Have you ever done this? Where you're in a dream and you know it's a dream. Yes. So when my dad first passed away, I would get like recount. I would, my dad died in his home. He had a hospice. And I would go down his hallway, look to the left and he would be either in the hospital bed or which he wasn't, but he would be standing in his closet. And I would be freaking out in the dream because I didn't want to see.

him like that. But in the dream, or I could hear myself, say, Chloe, you're dreaming. It's okay. Just wake up. You're going to be okay. But I would hear that, but I would never wake up. Like, I could not wake myself up. I've had night terrors as well. But it was more me, like I would be crying and I could feel real tears when I woke up. So that's interesting that you would try to wake up and you couldn't. Do you get lucid nowadays? No, I don't really dream that I remember. I know I dream. We're going to fix that. Okay, I would love to because I miss dreaming. So the lucid dreaming, back to that, you're asking me about the hands. Yes. Okay, so that is, that's a little technique that you can do when you become lucid and you want to stay in the dream. You find a focal point like your hands or a plant in the corner or something to focus on and it kind of anchors your mind in that in between state. Because when you're lucid, you're awake and your sleep at the same time. It's crazy.

It's crazy. Yeah. Do you lucid dream a lot? I do. About once a month. And do you like that? I love it. Okay.

It's better than sex. Yeah. Why do you like it so much? Because you can do anything. Isn't that crazy? You can do anything. I like to explore my dreamscape. Sometimes I'll walk through walls.

My go-to to make sure I'm dreaming is I'll jump up and see if I can float. Okay. And if I'm floating, I know I'm dreaming. But what I always tell my clients is when you find yourself in a lucid dream, even if it's scary, don't get out of it. The best thing you can do is ask questions. Like what? Like, what is the meaning of life? Okay. What do I need to know right now for my life? What do I do about my mother-in-law? You can ask anything. And your dreams will answer you. I was going to say, do you get direct answers or is that when you get More the symbolism type of those. Both. Okay. It depends. Sometimes you will get a direct answer. I've had one where there was no one else in the dream. I just asked the dream, what do I need to know right now?

And the dream said, everything's going to be okay. Just after I'd had a series of miscarriages and, you know, you're just, nothing matters anymore. And that dream, like I woke up from it. I was like, oh, it's going to be okay. I don't know if you get premonitions through your dreams, but are you ever able to say to someone else if that's a premonition? No. I do have, I had a precognitive dream just the other night. I have to tell you about because you're somehow involved. I love that. Oh my gosh. But yeah, so precognitive dreaming is so crazy and it does happen where you have a dream and then a few days later it comes true. Right. Have you

had that happen? I have, but I didn't know. Like when it came true, I was like, that's what that dream meant. I remember vividly, this was right before all of Hurricane Katrina. Yeah. And I had a dream that a town was demolished by water and it was so vivid. And it was like everything was destroyed. And I was so scared when I woke up. I was like, what? It was so real.

But it didn't say it was in New Orleans. It didn't say hurricane. It wasn't that spelled up. But I've never had a dream like that before. But I saw homes underwater. I saw people standing on their roofs. It was so strange to me, but I remembered it and I even talked about it for a few days. Oh, before it bothered me.

Before it happened. That's great. When it happened, I was like, wait, I think that was my dream. Yeah. Yeah, you had the moment. Like, wait, I dreamed this. Right. Yes.

But at the time, I just thought it was a very strange, powerful dream. Right. Oh, but it was not. I know. It was not. So, yeah, we can get precognitive dreams about. big worldly events that kind of send out a ripple into time space. And we can also get them when it's an emotionally charged situation that just involves ourselves. And so I've had probably

my whole life maybe three. And I had one the other day. And I emailed your producer. I said, oh my God, Jen, this is insane. We have to talk about this. Tell me. Because I get asked about pre-cognitive dreaming all the time. Okay. And I do think it happens more than we know. mostly because we don't tend to remember our dreams. And then we get the deja vu, which I think is connected to a dream we had. We just don't remember it. Oh, that makes sense. Some people can make the connection.

Okay. So the dream I had. So I created this mermaid portrait for you. And then I shipped it out. And then I had a dream. And this was on the night of February 25th. Okay. That I was holding a mermaid portrait I had drawn.

And I accidentally ripped it just about. the head of the mermaid, like right here. And I was like, shoot, and I'm walking around and I find the framer. I'm at a convention. And I said, can you fix this? And then I woke up. And I didn't think anything of it. I thought it had to do. I'm trying to figure out how to, you know, do my hair in a new way or whatever. And then on March 2nd, I got an email from the framerer saying, we're so sorry, your mermaid portrait was damaged in transit. And they took a picture. And it was damaged right here, exactly where I dreamt it. And it didn't even hit me yet. And I was typing, well, shoot, is there a way to fix it? Can you fix it? And I was like, wait a minute. You had that dream. I drew this. And I pulled

out my phone because I have a, I have a dream interpretation app I just built. Oh, cool. And so I've been, it's called Dream Chat with Lori. And so I was looking up the dream and I was like, oh yes, this was February 25th. I said in the dream to the framework, can you fix it? No way. Yes. Either way, I love it. That's so cool. Yeah. Oh my gosh. So then I started like seriously looking into why does this happen and how? Mm-hmm.

Have you heard of the block universe theory? No. It's also called eternalism. No. Okay. So I will do my best to articulate it. Okay. We really need Nilda Grass-Tyson here.

Okay. But I'll do my best. It's an Einstein theory that everything, past, present future already exists all at once right now. But we're only able to perceive it one frame at a time. The best way to explain it is that look at your life as a movie film. Every frame from birth to death exists on this film. But your brain is the projector. And it is only equipped to show you one frame at a time. Because the part of the brain in the prefrontal cortex that controls linear thought is dormant or mostly dialed down when we're in

REM dream sleep. I had a lot of people after 9-11 tell me they dreamed about it beforehand. That's crazy. Yeah. I remember my ex-husband had a major overdose where he basically died and then came back to life. And the night before I, and we weren't talking at the time, we were going through a divorce and I had a dream the night before and it was that I went to his funeral and I was at his funeral and I was crying and I was like, you know, I just need to call him. I was driving to a photo shoot. I remember I was going to him Benedict Canyon and this is in real life. And then I called, he didn't answer and I was like, whatever. We weren't really talking. So I was like, he's just not answering me. But I remember calling my mom just to tell her about my dream, which I don't do.

But I just needed to like get it out. Yeah. And then I did my photo. shoot at the end of my shoot, my sister called me and was like, Lamar overdosed. And they told me, the hospital said at one point he passed away. And I was like, my dream. And it was like, Oh, in real life they told you he passed away. And then I get to the hospital. They're like, oh, he's still alive. Just kidding. Yeah. I'm like, oh, okay. That was a doozy of emotions. Okay, that's really interesting. But I've never had something. And of course, I, when I found out about him, I didn't remember my dream. My mom was the one that said, because I was so emotional and not thinking. And my mom was like, you called me this morning. Like she brought it up. And I was like, you're right. And I, and then I think that's why I was so upset because I was like, I just, I just thought he was gone as anyone would if they tell you that. But that would be the strongest dream that's actually come to. true. I mean, the Hurricane Katrina, I didn't know or didn't have a personal connection there.

Right. And I just, I've never understood why I had that dream. And I had one other dream that was probably the most vivid dream of my life that like I'll never ever forget. It was not even the dream itself. It's how the dream made me feel. Like it was the most peaceful, beautiful. I swear, I think I saw either God or heaven. Right. And it was the most beautiful, majestic, gorgeous, glowing white place I've ever seen in my life. Like, I will never forget it. I was in Turkey in another country. It was just like the most intense feeling and waking up.

I've never had a feeling like that ever. And that's the only dream I've ever had like that. It was a white horse. And there was a gentleman, I know for sure, on the horse. But they were glowing. I couldn't make out their face. But we had some dialogue that I can't remember. It was the feeling. And it was the most beautiful, happy, joyous. I woke up like crying tears of joy. It was like the most beautiful thing and I've never forgotten that feeling. I bet it was your father. Probably. I bet that was a contact dream because I believe those happened because, you know, that's what propelled my whole career. So the way that happens, because, you know, I always like to understand the mechanics of things. Yeah. So like when I was talking about the precognitive dreaming and how we're able to do that.

theoretically because the prefrontal cortex that controls linear thought is dialed down so our consciousness is able to go outbound now with contact dreams like that it's the opposite we're receiving rather than going outbound and here's how I believe that works so the brain's always working in waves right everything that exists is in waves light waves sound waves microwaves. So when we enter Aram DreamSleep, our brain waves slow down to what is the perfect frequency where we're able to tune in or receive, you know, like a radio, the other consciousness that's out there. And so I believe that's how we're able to receive messages, communication, from those that have passed on. I think it's so beautiful when you get those experiences.

Teresa may have even said this. I have a medium friend and she said that the other side is what is reality. And this is more like the dream. And the other side is what is reality. You guys know my life is a little nonstop. It's like mom mode, work mode, running around all day. And then somehow, I still want to look cute for dinner or plans without changing five times. That's honestly why I always go to revolve. When you're balancing mom life, travel and actually having a life, and you need an outfit that looks competent and effortless, Revolve is my go-to. Everything is styled out in a way that makes sense. So whether it's school drop off, a dinner day, or a night out, it's easy to find your vibe without spiraling or scrolling forever. I also love that once I find a piece I like, they show me similar options so I can build a full outfit, because I don't have time to think through all of that anymore. And you can shop by vibe, like date night, night out, vacation.

So whether I'm packing or getting ready fast, it just saves me. And they actually just launched something new that I'm really into. It's called Revolve L.A. It's their own in-house label. And it feels super elevated, really clean, confident pieces that feel expensive but still effortless. It's the kind of stuff you put on and instantly feel put together, whether it's for a dinner, a night out or traveling. This is the brand to watch.

recently wore one of their sets during the day with Tatum and True, and then straight to dinner, and I felt so comfortable, but still really put together. And that is always the goal for me. Revolve has all the brands I actually wear, new arrivals daily, inclusive sizing, and the best customer service. Fast shipping, easy returns. It just works. Whether you're in mom mode, planning a night out, or traveling, Revolve makes getting dressed easy. Go to Revolve.com and just check out their new Revolve LA label. You can shop my favorites and get 15% off your first order with code Chloe. Fast shipping, easy returns. It just works. That's revolve.com slash Chloe to shop my faves and get 15% off your first order. Offer ends April 8th, so don't miss out. Spring always feels

like a little reminder to check in with yourself and ask, what actually feels like me right now, not what's trending, just what feels good for you in this season of your life. And honestly, I think self-expression shows up in the smallest places, how you start your morning, how you take a break, how you treat yourself in the middle of a busy day. And for me, that little moment of self-expression is my Starbucks order. It's such a simple thing, but I love that I can walk in and make my drink feel like mine every single time. If you know me, you know I am obsessed with an extra hot venty chai latte, whole milk, seven pumps chai, seven pumps chai, seven pumps classic, no water. It's cozy, it's bold, it's exactly what I want. But honestly, what I love about Starbucks

right now is that they refreshed their chai so you can actually customize the sweetness level. And you guys know I love options. I am loyal to my go-te-eastern. to order, like truly loyal, but now I can switch things up depending on my mood. Some days I'm sticking with my classic. Other days I'm like, okay, I want to be a little spicy, a little less sweet, maybe add a seasonal twist. I love that my drink can basically match my energy of that day. And that's what I love about Starbucks, that there's no right way to order your chai, especially now that you can customize the sweetness of your chai, change the milk, add the cold foam. You get to build your drink around your mood, your routine, your vibe of that day.

Some days I want comfort. In some days I want to switch it up. In some days, I just want that something that feels familiar. That's the kind of energy I'm trying to bring into spring, choosing myself in little ways, even in something as small as customizing my coffee order. It's not about perfection. It's about letting your everyday routines reflect who you are right now. Customize your chai your way at Starbucks. Order now on the app. I'm Armenian and I remember the older women in my family would always say put a cup of water by your bed. I don't, I can't remember. I can't remember. But like not, like not, like,

a one with an not with a closed lid. Like it has to be like an open cup of water. And I can't remember why they used to say that, but it used to encourage the dreams to come. Oh, kind of like the dream catcher. Maybe. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Maybe. That's interesting. That's very interesting. I did have a question about sex dreams. Okay. What are sex dreams? And because I've, I know people that climax or can do all of that in a sex dream. So what is that department? Okay. I don't even know how to say it. Okay, so sex dreams are They're very, very interesting Now, as women, we tend to get them the most mid-cycle.

Okay. Because that's when we're ovulating. And, you know, that's what our bodies are meant to do. And so you're going to be more heightened at that time. And so you're more likely to get the sex dream. Also, after early 20s, women will orgasm in their dreams far more than men. Men almost never do after early 20s.

Why is that? I think that's connected to, you know, your sexual peak. We peak way later in life than they do. So the meaning behind sex dreams. It's rarely about a physical union you want, but more about a psychological union you need. Okay. So if you get one of those dreams about someone you would never touch with a 10-foot pole, don't run into the shower.

It's okay. It just means if there's something about that person that you want to take on as your own. Maybe there's something about their personality, something about their life. Or maybe you even had a conversation with them where you connected in some way. So sex dreams are about connection. Maybe you've connected intellectually or emotionally with them. Or maybe there's something about them you want to connect into yourself. That makes sense.

So it doesn't mean it's about, okay. I mean, it can. I mean, if you know that you are really into this person and then you're, you have that dream, you're just safely exploring the possibilities. And the reason why we orgasm, actually, is because the body does not know the difference between a dream event and a waking event. But doesn't mean you're, like, touching yourself. No. Right. It just happens. Yeah. You will, as a woman, you are far more likely to complete the dream. That's actually in real life. That's so interesting. And men rarely do, and thankfully because it's way more messy.

Yeah. I do feel like sex dreams are really taboo and people don't talk about them. Right. But they're good for you psychologically because they're letting you know something you need to incorporate into your behavior or into your mindset or even into your life. So what I tell people when they get that sort of dream, what's the first thing that comes to mind when you think of that person? Now, is that something that would be beneficial to you if you incorporated it into yourself? Because, you know, the act of sex is the merger of two separate entities becoming one. So the dreaming mind will use that.

So it's not about the physical merger, but the psychological merger. There's certain things like people will say, if your teeth are falling out, that can mean something. There's certain, let's say, top five visuals that people get that I hear mean excellent. Y and Z. So what we're talking about are archetypes, which are symbols or themes in a dream that most of us tend to get and will mean mostly the same thing. Now, of course, dreams are very personal to the dreamer. And, you know, your own personal experiences will shape what each symbol means for you. But archetypically, generally speaking, like you mentioned, the teeth falling out. Have you had that? I feel like I have, but years ago. Okay. So that dream,

is so common because it's connected to a common behavior pattern of speaking without thinking about it first. Oh, totally then. People who don't have a filter tend to get it. Yes. Or people in the radio industry get it because they speak for a living. So anything having to do with the mouth in a dream, your teeth, your lips, your tongue, the throat area will usually be connected to communication. So if your teeth are falling out, it's usually because you've allowed something out of your mouth that should have stayed. and they're permanently like your teeth.

Got it. Tornadoes are really common. No, I've never talked of that. You're a hurricane dreamer. Yeah, apparently. What's a tornado? Okay, so tornadoes are really common in dreams because any kind of weather in a dream

is usually going to represent your emotions because your emotions are the weather of the mind. Right. So tornadoes are the most common because they represent worry and anxiety that's beginning to spin out of control. So there's a lot of people who, that's like their recurring dream. And they're usually proud card carrying members of the worry

work club. So the tornado is the way your subconscious is trying to show you what this worry and anxiety, what a destructive force it is to your psyche. You're worrying about something that's probably beyond your control. Just as a tornado is beyond anyone's control. Another common one is, oh, dreaming your partner's cheating. This one I get asked about probably that and the X. That's an interesting one. What I get asked about probably more than anything. So obviously, if there is some sort of infidelity in your past and you're dreaming this, that's a clear sign that you've not healed. Right. Even if you're in a different relationship. Because it's trauma. It is. It's trauma to the psyche. And it's hard to ever trust again. So if you're still getting the dream, it's letting you know you've got

more healing to do. And how do you know it's not a premonition? Okay. First of all, you want to ask yourself, is there other than the dream, are there any other red flags? You know, is there anything else that just seems off? Anything else he or she has said or done that just, you know, makes you give the side eye? Then it could be your intuition. Now, if it seems to be coming completely out of left field,

and, you know, you know that's not happening, but you're getting this dream, it's because there is a third wheel in the relationship, but it's not necessarily another person. It's more likely another thing. like their phone or a side hustle or the hot rod in the garage or they're working too much it could be a new baby even a new pet it's something that's causing you to feel like you're not getting the attention and the time you feel you deserve or that you used to get and so these dreams are good for you as all

dreams are because they're shining a light on something your subconscious wants you to fix okay and what about dreaming of an ex okay dreaming of the ex even in like a romantic way like I've had dreams of exes, but it's me, like transported back. It wouldn't be like the current me. So it's almost like a memory. Oh, okay. So you're not you now. You're way back. Yes. Okay. And how do those dreams play out? You're like getting back with this person? No, it was just like we were, like we're still in that time frame. Like let's say 2015 or whatever. It would be, it would be the same place, time, our relationship if we were together at that year. I've driven, it was almost like a memory and I'm like, wait, did I dream or was I just reliving something that already happened?

Yeah, did you time travel. Probably. Yeah. Okay, so when we dream of an ex in that capacity, and you're like back together with them, there's likely, it's one of two main things. There could be something going on now that feels similar to back then. So then you want to ask yourself, is this a good thing? Right. Am I repeating a behavior that my subconscious is warning me about? Mm-hmm.

Or is it, oh, okay, I liked this about that person and I like this about this same person. Another reason we'll get the X is, okay, abuse of X's. I have a lot of clients ask me about, you know, I've moved on. I, you know, I got out of it. I'm good. But I keep dreaming. I'm getting back with them. Mm-hmm.

Why? So the reason why that happens is because it's actually a sign of healing. Oh, good. Your subconscious is showing you that you're making peace with that part of your life. Because we tend to blame ourselves when we go through something terrible like that. Right. Why didn't I get out? Why did I let it go on so long? Why did I let my kids witness it? But the subconscious is saying, oh, look where you are now. Make peace with it. It helps you become who you are. I've heard that any face you see in a dream is someone that you have to know you can't create. Right. Faces, is that true?

I disagree with that too. Yeah. I mean, how could you possibly track that? Right. Because whenever I read about that, I'm like, well, how do you know? Right. How is that? How did they formulate that?

What data did they use? Well, and they'll say, oh, what could have been if I'm walking through the mall and I see a stream? but my brain isn't capturing that person's face for me to then dream about it later. I think what that does, and I've, you know, I've seen that before many times. I think that's reducing the power of our own creativity. Can your dreams be completely your imagination? Is it something that I've had to see before? Or can I create this whole world that I've never encountered? Well, I think you can create it. Now, most dreams and like the setting of our dreams are based on familiar things. Like maybe you're in your kitchen and you walk out the door and you're in your third grade class. You know, dreams will lump together different sections of our life. But I do think that our dreams can create new things. You know, and we have so many things in our world because someone dreamed it because it didn't exist before.

Right. Like the search engine Google is from a dream Larry Page had. No way. So he woke up from remembering a dream about being able to download everything at once. I may not be getting this exactly right. Yeah. But so he saw like all these links to everything. And so he immediately woke up and ran down to Starbucks or his local coffee shop and he was like taking notes on his napkins. And then he called his business part. And he goes, I've got this idea. This I think this is something we can do. What do you think? That's crazy. And his business partner thought he was crazy, but they worked it out. And they did it. Here we are. So I always think like anything in a movie, a mermaid, a fair, like I am such a believer of everything because I feel like, well, someone had to

see this somewhere. And it could have been a dream. It doesn't mean it was actual something tangible in real life, but someone saw it somewhere. Someone's brain was creative enough. or in some other reality, they've seen this. Yes. What you're touching on is something called the collective unconscious. Everything, all energy, all consciousness, everything is out there. Everything that has yet to happen. Everything that has yet to be created.

Everything that has already been created and how it became created. It's all out there, the collective unconscious. And when we dream and our brain waves are at that perfect frequency, we're able to, tune in to different things. Thomas Edison used to call it grabbing ideas from space, which is probably quite literally what we can do when we're dreaming. Do you set your room, like saying that you have to be at like the perfect vibration or any of that? Do you set your room in a certain temperature? Do you have like my daughter and son sleep with a sound machine? Yes. Do you like that or is that distracting for your sleep? No, I, yes, I do that. I have to have it at 73 degrees.

And I have to have on my sound machine. I also have, you probably won't need it yet, but those sheets, the bed jet sheets that they like, they're air conditioned sheets. Okay, love. I love that. So I have to have those going too. So you have a certain, like you have to set everything, a certain ambiance, the setting to sleep. Yes, yes. And then when I travel, of course, I take my, my, my, I have to take my pillow with me and my sound machine. I always was curious about the sound machine because I didn't grow up with one. And my kids. like they need it to sleep. And then when I'm laying in bed, putting them to sleep, I fall asleep in two seconds. I think it's amazing. But I'm, I always wonder if that is distracting me from dreaming or is that affecting them later? What sound does it make? The white noise. Okay. Yeah. Is that good? No, white noise is good. Okay. Also, rhythmic noises, like, you know, the sound of the dishwasher, those are good, too. Or the sound of the ocean. Those are good. Because they kind of like go along with your brainwave pattern. Okay. Good. I was all, I was like, who can I ask about this? Is there anything about colors that symbolize something significant in dreams? Yes. Yes. Yes. That's a good question.

Colors are very important to pay attention to in dreams. In fact, everything is. There is never, ever anything in your dream that is random. Okay. Ever. Everything, down to what you're wearing, down to what people say, down to what's like sitting on the table in your dream. Everything is a piece of the puzzle and was pieced together by your wise dreaming mind to give you a message you need to know right now about your life. So speaking of colors, when a color stands out in a dream, it is for a reason. Now, there's the archetypical meaning of colors, like blue can often represent depression, the blues. White is often the color of new beginnings starting over. Red can be a red flag. You know, like your subconscious is going warning, warning. But it could also be passion, depending on the

context, you know, the dream. Black often represents mystery, the unknown. Green can represent envy. It can also represent growth. Yellow can represent fear, but it could also represent joy, you know, depending on the context. But the way to figure out the personal meaning to you, if the archetypical meaning doesn't fit what's going on in your life right now, then this is a question I ask my clients when we get stuck. And this is a question to always, ask yourself when figuring out your own dream, where does your mind go when you think of that color? Kind of like the word association game. What comes to mind? What's the first thing that comes to mind? Yeah. What comes to mind? Is it a school color? Was it the color of your favorite sweater

that you used to have? You know, where does it go? And then whatever sticks out, that is going to be connected to the message. So maybe say it was your very, very favorite sweater that you used to have. And always felt like beautiful when you wore it. If that color shows up in a dream, okay, what's going on now where you need to feel that again? I am so curious about nightmares. Why do we have nightmares? Okay. So nightmares begin usually somewhere between two and four years old. Yes. Are your kids having them? My daughter was having them. Last night she had one. Oh, no. But it wasn't bad. Like she came to my room really calm and just said, Mommy had a nightmare. I was like, come on, girl, get in bed. And she was fine. She wanted. She wanted. to talk a little bit, but she doesn't like to talk about the nightmare. Oh, like she doesn't want to make it, I think, real. Okay.

My daughter definitely has a little bit of a gift. So she, I believe everything my kids, like, if they're like, there's someone in my room, I'm like, let's go kick its ass. Like, I'm not one of those people that's like, go to bed. I don't believe you. I believe everything. I'm like, who's in there? So she's dreamed about things.

And I don't know if she's either been awake and sees something or if she's really dreaming it. Right. But True has, she does have vivid dreams. But talking about nightmares, she doesn't like to talk about them. But she will say I had a nightmare. And it was normally it's like a, she has said in the past like it's a shadowy man or something like that. But she won't go into a lot of details. Oh, the shadowy man.

Yes. Okay. Well, that's very interesting. Okay, so nightmares, now they're normal and they're actually healthy for children. Unless they're, you know, becoming too much. If the nightmare here and there happens, it's normal, it's healthy, and it indicates that the child is beginning to process negativity. Okay. And they're learning how to deal with it.

And usually something will have triggered the nightmare, like maybe the goldfish died or, you know, maybe someone at school was mean to them or they got in trouble. You know, something will trigger it. And then as we get older, we will still get them. And they're caused by a couple of things. They're caused by a difficult issue. We don't know how to work through. They can be caused, of course, by something from the past that still affects us today. They're usually caused by something that's just very upsetting. So when you get a nightmare, ask yourself, what is the most upsetting thing going on in my life right now? That will be what caused it. If there's nothing upsetting going on in your life right now, then there's likely something from the past that still causes you to behave a certain way because that happened. And your subconscious is trying to alert you to the fact that this negative thing is still affecting you. Let's work through it. And so when you are able to pinpoint what caused the nightmare and then you begin actively working to correct it, even just the first little step towards fixing it, the nightmares will stop. Like when I said I had a nightmare not too long ago. It was about being stabbed. Like someone was stabbing me. Oh, wow. It was so

dark and horrible. And it's the one dream I remember in ages. And I remember waking up and I said a prayer. And I was like, I do not like this energy. What was that about? And it, I also think it had something to do with my kids because I remember praying about like just like covering all of us. Let's unpack that. Yeah. You were being. stabbed. Yeah. Okay. Do you recall who it was? No. And I don't think it was someone I knew. Where in your body were you being stabbed? Torso. The torso. Okay. As the stabbing is happening. It's like a horrible dream. As you're being stabbed, do you remember what you were thinking? No. I just remember. What I do remember is how much I didn't like that I knew I was dreaming. I didn't like I was dreaming. And then I was also, and I can't remember

if I had this thought when I woke up or in my dream. And I remember saying either one of the times, you don't remember a dream and this is the dream we're remembering. Like, yeah, like I just remember that. And I was like, wake up, like, get out of this. And I just kept remember that energy. But I don't remember. Oh, you did say to yourself, get out of this? Yeah, I was just like, what, okay. Yeah, like, I don't like that might actually help us. Now, when we're stabbed, most often, it's because we have been the victim of someone's cutting remarks. Oh, easy. Just kidding. Do you recall at that time, anyone's saying anything hurtful or critical to you? I don't remember specifically, but I'm, I hear critical, hurtful thing.

on like a daily basis, but I can't remember what, I don't think there was one that stuck out to me. Okay. And it was stabbing, not slicing. Stabbing. Okay, because actually it makes a difference. Wow. Yeah, every little detail. And it was a knife. Knife. And it was the torso. Mm-hmm. Okay. So that area is about reproduction and about weight, usually. Anything going on there that's been difficult. But could it be like chest? I just remember. was like this part of my body. Okay. So you're getting stabbed up here too? Yes. Okay. Oh my God. This is so morbid, you guys. I'm so sorry. But they don't always mean. Right. Right. Right. Yes. Right. It's so everyone knows. Yeah. It's symbolic. Yes. The chest is usually about, it can be about your emotions as well as getting

something off your chest. So my first thought is maybe something was going on that was upsetting you. Someone perhaps had said something that cut like a knife, so to speak. Right. Okay. And. And, the chest is being brought to attention because you need to get this off your chest. Also, you had the thought, I need to get out of this. Yes. Any thought you have in a dream is going to be the most important part of the dream. So at that time, can you remember, was there something going on that you needed to get out of? No, like I never remember saying, ow, I never remember feeling like this hurts.

I just remember more, this is scary, it's not my thing. I don't want to be here. But I don't remember feeling pain. I don't remember seeing blood. I need to get out of here and I don't want to be here. Right. Okay. So those are actually really important thoughts and they may get us somewhere.

Okay. So I don't want to be here. Could mean I don't want to be here in this mindset. So at the time maybe you were in a bad mindset or it could be I don't want to be here in this situation. Maybe at the time you were in a difficult situation you wanted out of. I need to use your app. And what do you do on your app when if I have this dream? I just can record little things like that.

You can type it in or talk it in. It's called Dream Chat with Laurie, L-A-U-R-I. So you type it in or you talk it in, and then it starts out. It'll ask you questions like I'm asking you right now. Oh, interesting. It'll first tell you, okay, well, here's a couple ideas. And if you don't know some of the answers, it will still. It's a conversation.

And so I've programmed it to think like me. So it will ask you these sort of things. Okay, well, where does your mind go? and you know and also the thing about this app is that it has a day journal in it so before you go to bed there's five questions you fill out that are actually the ingredients of your dreams so like what upset you today what kind of significant conversation email or text did you have today what were you excited about today what was positive today what was on your mind the most today so you put that in at night you have your dream you wake up in the morning you type your dream in and then it

pulls from that and makes connections for you. It takes a snapshot of your dream and puts you in it. Oh, wow. Because you upload a selfie. And so it always uses that selfie to put you in the picture of your dream. Like a visual? Yes. Now, if you have a dream and you don't want to see yourself getting stabbed, you can turn off the art.

But otherwise. I'm like, wait, for that one, I don't want to see that one. If you're dreaming of fairies or whatever, then you'll get a nice little image of it. What about sleep paralysis? I think I told you I had night terrors. Yeah. But I had sleep paralysis where I would literally, and if someone, I would literally like be crying or saying like I need to wake up, I need to wake up. One time I, my sister was sleeping with me and I was talking and she's like, you're fine. Wake up and I could not wake up. And I was like, wake me up. Oh, oh, I hate that. I hate that. And it was horrible. They literally had to put a wet washcloth on me to wake me up. I haven't had those since I've been, I think 19 because my dad died at 19. But it was the. most horrific types of dreams and I never, ever, ever wish a sleep paralysis on anyone. Yeah, they're terrible. Horrible. Okay, so here's the thing about sleep paralysis. It is harmless.

Okay. They don't feel like it. No, they don't feel like it. Oh my gosh. So here's what happens when you get sleep paralysis. It's usually caused by a fitful night of sleep, bad sleep, your sleep routine is messed up. Now, when we go to sleep and we enter the dream phase, REM, the brain releases a chemical that paralyzes your skeletal muscles. It's a built-in safety mechanism so you don't get up and act out your dream. When we're having a fitful night of sleep or we're just not sleeping good, we can start to wake up before our brain can catch up and reactivate our skeletal muscles. That is crazy. So we get stuck very briefly in the in-between state. It's got hypnagogia. And you're awake and your sleep at the same time, but you can't move because your body's still paralyzed.

Now, what's going on in the brain is the amygdala, the fear center of the brain, is highly active during sleep paralysis. So that's why it's always such a frightening experience. Now, it is also a hallucinatory experience. And you can hear, maybe whispers, or you will perceive someone sitting on your chest or on the bed or maybe in the corner of the room. And that's not real. That's just your brain doing that. And a lot back in the old days, they called this the old hag syndrome because they thought that that sinister presence in the room was a witch. Well, I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah. And it definitely seems like some dark, demonic thing. People think that they're being

abducted by an alien or that they're being haunted or they're having a demonic possession. and you're not, you're just stuck. It's a, it's a. But how do you talk yourself through that? Okay, so when you know what it is, usually once you understand what it is and it happens, you're aware. Okay, I know what this is. You can turn it into a lucid dream. Ooh.

And you can. That would be way better than the- Yes, you can know yourself to float out of your body or just have fun with it. Can you explain? Because I think, I think that would help a lot of people. I think if anyone's ever experienced. to sleep paralysis, it's, like, terrifying. I hated, like, I still remember that feeling it was horrible. I would have loved to have had some tools. Even now, I'm, like, praying, I'm not talking

about this, and then I'm going to have this. Like, I'm like, please, I'm going to say so many prayers. But what are a few things you can do to take control to get out of the sleep paralysis? Okay. So when it, well, the best way to avoid it is to always have the same sleep routine. Okay. You know, make sure you get enough good, solid sleep. But when it does happen, when you know what it is, odds are good, you're going to understand what's happening as it's happening. And so you will know, okay, I know what this is, and I know it's not going to last long, and I'll be out of it in seconds. That will calm you.

And go ahead and try to turn it into a lucid dream. And say, okay, I'm going to float out of bed. That's the easiest thing to do, because you're already lying down. Or you can ask questions. If that sleep demon or whatever is in your sleep paralysis episode, ask a question. question. Pretend it's a lucid dream because it kind of sort of is. And does everyone have this much control in their dreams? Like how you're like, you can ask questions. To me, I'm thinking, how do I know I can even talk in my dream? Right. Like when you're in the sleep paralysis. Yes. Like,

I feel like you are, you have so many dreams and you have such control over your dreams. Me, I feel like I haven't dreamt in forever. I know I do dream. I just can't remember my dreams. I don't know if my first thought would be like, oh, I'm dreaming. I can talk at this point. How do you strengthen, whether it be like the trust in yourself during your dreams or how do you strengthen that ability? Well, the biggest element to this is just knowing what it is. The thing that's so scary about it is that when it happens, most people don't know what's happening. They don't know what it is. But once you understand what it is, you usually do have enough consciousness to be able to say, okay, this is sleep paralysis. It's not going to last. Let me see what I can do with it. Sometimes that's all it takes is just knowing. Yeah, I never knew what it was when it was happening to me. And it is the weirdest sensation because you're almost like, how I felt was as if I was like hovering above my body and I could see me sleeping. So it's just, you know, knowledge is power. A few seconds. Yeah, it never lasts very long.

It can seem like it, but it really doesn't last long. Yeah, I feel. Your body just, your brain just has to kind of catch up. Like, oh, we're awake. I need to get the body moving. Right. I've had this experience. I was much younger, but I had a dream of someone.

And I knew and I wasn't going to call the person to tell them. And then they had a dream of me the same night. They called me to say, I dreamt of you last night. And I said, I dreamt of you last night. It was like we met up in our dreams. Is that a real thing? Okay. So there's a couple things. It's only happened once to me. There's a couple things you might be touching on. One is called shared dreaming, where you and someone else have the same or similar dream on the same night. And that usually happens to, people that are very close, like best friends, sisters, mother, daughter, husband, wife, boyfriend, and girlfriend, people that are very, very close. And you have the same or similar dream because you're dealing with the same issue in some way. And your subconscious responds in a similar way. Because you're on the same wavelength. I guess, yeah.

Yeah, because you're so close. And so your subconscious responds in a very similar way with similar themes and symbols in the dream. Do you have any advice you would give to people about sleep or dreams or just any tips even about how to get good dreams? So start paying attention to your dreams because they are the most powerful part of who you are. They are your built in GPS. They are your built in Mel Robbins. And they are your built in best friend. you're built-in brutally honest best friend who's going to tell you what you need to know whether you like it or not.

And they're helping you navigate life. And they're giving you great ideas. And they're helping you problem solve. They're helping you become who you're supposed to be. So start paying attention to them. Start journaling them. Start talking about them. Start listening to them.

Start paying attention to the patterns of your dreams. Like do you keep dreaming you're attacked by a bear? Start keeping a day journal. Not my app will do this for you, dream chat with Lori. Start keeping a day journal in tandem with your dreams because then you'll start to see, oh, every time I dream I'm attacked by a bear, I had a phone call with my mother. So you'll, you know, it helps you get your life right. It helps you recognize patterns. It helps you be a very powerful force in your own life. Don't be afraid of the bad dreams. They're good for you. They're helping. you with a very difficult situation. That's why the dream is difficult because there's something difficult you need to work through. Teach your children to talk about their dreams. Even nightmares?

Even the nightmares. Okay. Now with children, what you can do when they're having nightmares, try to help them figure out what caused it. Okay. It'll be something from the day before usually. What happened true that upset you yesterday? You know, what was difficult yesterday? And then they'll be able to pinpoint it. And then you have something tangible in real life you can help them with, but also to help them not be afraid of the dream. This is a little trick. The younger they are, like under four, you can say, okay, we're just going to flip the pillow over because that's the good dream site. Okay. Something that simple is suggestive enough that that'll stop the nightmare. But when they get a little older, talking about the nightmare with them, and guiding them through

changing the nightmare. So you can have fun with it. You can draw it out. Like if there's some kind of weird monster in the dream, say, okay, draw it. And then, you know, make it silly after they've drawn it. You know, put a big old bow on the horn or whatever, you know, make it silly. But let them control how they change it. Okay. You can guide them, but you've got to let them have the control. Also, you can do it in comic book form if they're older. But let them have the control in how they decide to change it because they're taking the scary. out of it. And they're learning, oh, I can have control. Ultimately, children get nightmares because something's making them feel powerless. This gives them a sense of control and power,

and I can change things for the better. Do you think it matters, like when people watch a scary show before bed? Yeah, right? Yeah. Because I believe that. Yeah, it's best, you know, some people are desensitized to it and they can watch Breaking Bad and they're fine. But some people are more sensitive. So, if you're more sensitive, don't do that. You know, watch a chick flick. Right, totally. Or read something inspiring or just journal before you go to bed so that you don't need to put fuel on the fire, so to speak. And for kids, the same thing. Like, my daughter doesn't watch anything scary. My son, we just read books before bed. But sometimes I'm questioning if she has a nightmare, was it something that she was just watching before? But it could be. But it's not really scary.

But it's, I, I've normally left it alone when she doesn't want to talk about it. So I want to respect that. But I've, I always think, like, let's talk about it because then we're making it like not real. And if she's suppressing it, yes. That makes me nervous. But I'll encourage her to try to talk about it more. Yeah. See if you can get her to do that and, you know, be creative with it too.

The coloring thing is cute. And she enjoys that. Yeah. Very smart. What do you love most about the work that you do? I love seeing people get their aha moments when I help them make connections with their dreams. Because it's, first of all, even for me, when I make my own aha moments, it's magical. It's like, oh, yes, you've got my back subconscious.

I really appreciate that. You're so good to be. And when I see people I'm working with go through that. It reinforces how powerful this thing is within us. the dreaming mind is so amazing. It's magical. It's so helpful. It's so wise. And so when I see people, you know, make big connections and then they have something. It's not just, oh, that's what my dream means. It's like, oh, I have a takeaway. I understand this better now so I can handle it better now. Or I understand it better now so I know what to do now. It can be so life changing. And I love seeing people.

people get that aha moment. That's my favorite thing. Thank you so much for coming and talking about all things dreams. It was so interesting. And I'm so grateful. Thank you. Thank you.