Khloé in Wonder Land - Valentine's Day, But Make it Messy ft. Nat & Liv

Episode Date: February 13, 2025

This Valentine’s, skip the romance and gather your girls—Khloé, Nat & Liv are spilling real tea. Dating mishaps, bad dates, and DM drama? It’s the group chat IRL.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Yes, daddy, put it right in my face. I think Liv needs to be up higher, because she's going to be going down. I've gone down in a while, you might say. The first time ever we're having sex, okay? I don't know where, he farts, okay? What? Like just...

Instantly retract. Yeah, like... No, I'm going to die. So I dated this one guy. It's just like, instantly retract. Yeah, like, no, I'm gonna die. So I dated this one guy. Bless him, he kinda had a little bit lower hangers. So, it's the sock club. So that's what our family is like.

I love that. Welcome to Chloe and Wonderland. This is the podcast for real and raw conversations that you won't wanna miss. We've been drinking. I think Natalie's at capacity. Shut up. Film her. Hey, so first off, we've been drinking. And I think what I would think the misconception is that people probably think that we drink all the time. I think people think we're all party girls.

Yes. Which maybe we were when we were younger. We were. We were. And I'm proud of that. And we had a great time. But I haven't left the house since, I think, Halloween. No, and we're all literally twins, I think. Introverted extroverts is how we describe ourselves.

Totally. And that means? That we don't leave the house. But when we do, when we do, we are the life of the party. And we are. We are. I think it's called, and maybe we'll have to look it up And Omnivert because when we're home we're home and we're happy and we are not bored

We're sober sober not doing a thing. Just living our lives watching TV. Who knows and then when we're out We are the energy. We are the reason why I have to give you know an exhibit a I don't think it's came out on your reason why. I have to give you an exhibit A. I don't think it's came out on your show yet. Cause I don't know when this is airing, but you guys. This show is airing, I think Valentine's Day week. And I think your show, but I don't know the episode. I have to say, and I don't know what camera I'm on,

but Chloe's birthday, 40th birthday. I need to take a moment and say to camera, the funnest night I think of my life. And that's a testament and say to camera, the funnest night, I think, of my life. And that's a testament, though, to who you are and such a great person and friend and energy you bring to everyone. It was the funnest party, and that was an extrovert night. You know, normally, you can go to a party,

and then you're like, I had so much fun. And then other people are like, yeah, whatever. Across the board. Across the fucking board. Everyone was thriving and had the best time. Yeah, you know, whatever like across the board across the board everyone was Thriving and had the best time. Here's the example at our age now You're cuz you know you girls are moms people have families husbands wives, whatever Yeah, you're not gonna always get someone who's ready to go full tilt

Everyone was ready to go show it up with everyone But again, it's everybody you everyone wanted wanted to celebrate you and just have the best time. But I also think being older, you realize how much effort it takes to go out, to get dressed, to book a nanny, or just honestly get yourself ready to go out if you don't have kids. You're like, I appreciate the commitment and dedication it takes for people to do that.

And then for everyone not only to do that, but to show up and be like, tomorrow I don't care how f***ed up I am. We're going for it. We're going balls to the walls. And we all did. That made me happy. Yeah, so whenever that episode airs,

I don't know how much you guys are going to show on your show. No, I watched it. We're safe. One of the best nights in my life. We're all safe. We all look amazing. But I mean, it looks what it was. It was so much fun just without the slob kabob-ness at the end.

Because I was like, you got to go home. The text message afterwards from everybody was like, that was the most epic night of my life. Do you not remember those hour-long phone calls afterwards? Oh my god. That was the end. The drums was amazing. It kind of projected it. Talked about. Oh my god. Oh yes. That was the end. The drums was amazing. The drums. It kind of, it kind of did.

Talked about. It was amazing. So I don't know what you guys think, but my top questions about you guys are, how did we meet? And people do not know what your voices sound like. A lot of people are like, they see you on Instagram, and they're always like, why don't they film more videos? Because it's just too much work.

I think it's a millennial thing. We just run the cusp of like, I know we have to do video for content and all that, but it's just a little hard to grab a phone and be like, hey, guys. No, I feel like it's like a cringe thing. I feel like maybe I'm judging Gen Z, but I feel like it's when I watch Gen Z, like, man,

like dance and do whatever. I don't judge it, though. It's great. I just can't do it. I know, I know. But I'm being honest. It's like, eh, but I'd rather not. I'd skip it.

Like when we were on our TV shows, that's more our vibe. Like a camera's just there. Yeah, just casually. You're not talking to a camera. But it's not as performative. Yeah, it's like, let me plan this out in X, Y, Z. Or I can't. I can't.

It's an introverted thing. I'm not really going to be like, OK, I'm at home. Hey, guys. Yeah, I can't do a day in the life. I wish I could. Me too. I feel so weird. I do love watching it.

But yeah, that is a funny take and a great observation, because we don't do a lot of video on social. Or not video where you guys are talking. Right. Do you guys remember how we met? Because I think I do. I don't. I know.

OK, I want to see if it's the same story. When we all went on a hike at Kim's. Is it? Yes. We went to Kim's Hidden Hills house. And we walked to Kylie's. And we walked to Kylie's up the hill. Yeah, that was our first meeting.

And so Natalie has a daughter. Yes. And Kim and I have daughters, kids. And so Natalie's daughter, her name is Dove. She is friends with all of our kids. And our kids also have this bond circle, which is amazing. So we have these little bubbles all over the place. And they all go to the same school.

And they all get to hang out. And so we're all so intertwined that we'll see each other at school and be like, hey, what's up? And that's sort of our check-in. And from across the field, we're like, hey, Nat, Liv, yes. And then we're good. We feel recharged. Totally.

So tell everyone where you guys are from. Natalie and I are cousins. Yes, you guys are cousins. Because you know a lot of people think you guys are sisters. They do. That is true. I know that. No, so our moms are sisters.

Julia and Rhonda, shout out. Shout out to Julia and Rhonda. And yeah, we obviously grew up together. Wait, what's crazy is Natalie looks identical to Liv's mom. It's insane. Everyone says it. No, no, it's a fucking. I know Kim told me you saw a picture and you were tripping out.

I saw her at preschool. I was like, oh, I go, are you Nat's mom? She's got her aunt. I was like, you're freaking me out right now. So I know. I know. It's it's actually pretty crazy. Jeans are wild. Jeans are weird. Yeah. Yeah. Their cousins. Yeah, we're cousins. Our moms are sisters.

Obviously, we grew up together like we were siblings. And then we're from Vancouver, Canada. We moved here about 10 years ago now. To almost the date, it was February 7, 2015. Oh my gosh, that's crazy. To almost the date, I recently became an American citizen. No, for real though, it's cool. No, I love that it's a major accomplishment.

So are you dual citizenship? Yes, so I kept my Canadian. That's a plus. We are West Coast girls. We love being Canadian, but we love being here with you. Do you notice a difference? Because not from just where you're from, because I know it's a small town,

but do you think Canadian men are different than American men? Yes. Yes. In what way? 100%. Bad or good? I feel like just in general, Canadian people are different than American people, and that

goes to say for just general politeness and like. Well, you're just raised different. You're just raised different. And it sucks, because I feel like the only good American people we've met is when you guys. Oh my God. I swear to God, I swear.

But everyone says Canadians are much nicer. They are, just in general, it's just kinder, nicer feel. I think this. When you go to the grocery store, it's just kinder, nicer feel. When you go to the grocery store, right? On average, the average person is just like. When you hold open a door for someone, they'll say thank you.

They're cute. They don't. I want to say. Or they don't even hold the door for you. Yeah. I'm sick. It's very like a dog eat world situation here, right? Where in Canada, it's like a community feel

and just more kinder And so that does bleed into the dating situation Like I feel like men are just raised to be a bit kinder a bit more polite a bit more dated as American men and we're going with this But I but funny enough I do still look for those qualities in American man. One quick thing as you're saying that I've noticed with American men that kills me is because I've served and Natalie has as well we've been matrices before in our past life is I feel like a lot of

American men don't look at the servers and say they say let me get For me especially being a server not only just be nice to a human but just like I you know, hi May please have that. I agree and Tristan was always like hi you would look yeah in their eyes I love eye contact. Can you name like what you don't name the person? Okay, like what would what is the best date you've ever been on versus, Natalie, I can't even look at you because I already know, versus what is the worst date you've ever been on.

Wait, can I have one? Have as many sips as you need to get these stories out. But honestly, the worst date episodes are wild. Okay, so we're talking about actual dates. Okay, first of all. Yes, we are. Well, I'm not much of a date. Okay, first of all, we're not really.

I don't think any of us are. We're not like. None of us are daters. We're going on a date. It's like we've met through someone. Damn. Or they've like slid into our DM. I know Chloe's worst date.

What is it? Burgers? Oh, yes. Crying in a corner, burgers. Crying in a corner. Burgers. That was no names. No names. No names. But the hottest guy.

So gorgeous. So I'll tell you. So hot he might need another chance. Oh, he might need another chance. No matter how pathetic the actions are, I feel like he needs a redemption. That's maybe. He's so hot.

OK, so I'll tell you my worst. The worst date I've ever been on. I don't know if it's a date or like a weekend. I can't figure it out. Well, it's a date or whatever. Because we don't really like go out to a restaurant. We don't go out. Pick me up.

Yeah, we don't. Especially you. You're not going to just go out. This guy randomly met this guy in an elevator, meet this guy, and I'm just being me. So I'm like being super flirty. And this part's like off a movie, you guys. I'm like, hey, what's your name?

Like just being like funny. Who meets in an elevator? Amazing. Meets in an elevator. He's like, hey, I'm actually staying on your floor, yada yada, I'm like, okay, whatever. We end up getting in touch with one another. We don't really hang out this trip.

He's like, hey, I'm gonna be in, I would love to hang out with you. Cool. We were in M*** at the same time. I hate to hear this. Kim and I, we go to M***. So hot. We're in M***.

I don't know if he was belligerently drunk or on something else, but we were like, let's go meet at this suite upstairs so we can sit and talk. And this person is now hysterically crying over a cheeseburger and crying because I'm such a nice person. And clearly, these are not normal emotions, because we have not done anything yet. And we can't even have a chat.

And I just remember being like, how do I get out of this place? I have a grown man who's crying over a cheeseburger saying how great I am. But we don't know each other yet. I was planning on making out with you tonight. And it's now not happening. Let's have a smooch. I am dying to.

And it couldn't happen. And I couldn't get there. So wait, how did you get out again? Did someone do a fake call? I remember saying, oh my gosh, our flight is in a couple hours, I have to leave. And I ran to Kim's floor and I was like, I got to get out. And Kim and Kylie were in the other floor

and I was like, I got to get out of here. And they were like, what are you doing? I was like, I'm hiding until it's time, until he leaves. Because I could not handle it. And I don't know if he was on drugs. Either way, if you're on drugs, it's a red flag. I don't wanna be with you if you're on drugs. But he was so hot.

So hot. He is, he's still currently very hot. What a let down. Like if you weren't crying and you were still on drugs, I probably would hook up with you. Yeah, if you weren't crying, we may have left the slide. Totally. Just cause you're so hot. But you can't cry over a cheeseburger

and expect me to be horny after that. I just wanna know what his game plan was. Like he came in with a like, well he utterly blew it. He just blew some drugs and like. A chat with Chloe, you blew it, man. You guys, the sobbing over a burger and fries was wild. Maybe he overshot and he was really nervous.

Probably was nervous. He was nervous. Well, that was my worst date. So what was your worst date? Dang, I don't really go on dates, to be honest. OK, mine wasn't like a date. Mine was like a meetup, whatever you want to call it. OK, so I don't do dates at all.

OK, what was your worst situation? So here's the thing. Because I can say it for you. So I can say it for you. I don't really do dates like at all, which I probably should. I should start doing those, but I don't. We all should. But someone that ended up being like someone that I dated, we're having sex, okay? He like of nowhere, he startles himself. Startles.

He farts, OK? What? And he gets so nervous, and he farted and got so nervous. Wait, I don't know this story yet. No, I know. I haven't told you guys, because it's that embarrassing. Well, I know it. So it's a fart and instant retract of the moment.

Like, yeah. Like, no, I'm going to die. I'm going to die. So it's a fart and like instantly retract of like the moment No, didn't he say like sorry which is maybe worse wait he addressed the fart For me I'm like you don't you acknowledge. You guys, that is disgusting. Yeah, so. You don't address. And he did like a suck up noise. Because he's trying to distract the noise. No, it didn't help.

And I was like, look. And you're like, locked eyes. And you're like, yeah, there's no way to go back from this. There's no turning back. That is so disgusting. He farted. And yeah, so just like, like, yes. Sit there and bear it.

I mean, it wasn't a good look. First, fuk. I'm not going to lie. It wasn't. I mean, we've, you know. And people are human. But no, but that's sick. That is nasty.

And then I was like, do I acknowledge? Do do I verbally say like, ha ha ha ha? You're farting? No! Or do you just like casually be like, no, he shouldn't have addressed me like going. No. That's it. Do you guys want a drink? Yeah, let's have a drink.

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and head to ZocDoc.com. And this time, you're getting actual answers. I was dating someone. I can't remember if we were intimate or not at this point. I'm assuming we were. I don't know, but I'm assuming. And he slept over and he wet the bed. But just wet the bed. And I was like, OK, that's weird, obviously,

because we're adults. This is weird. 20 and older, adults. And then I remember, he never addressed it. We never talked about it. I was like, OK, maybe this didn't happen, because we didn't talk about it. Were you guys partying or no?

I don't think we were. Maybe drinking, but we weren't blackout belligerently drunk. It was the morning. You guys will die. It's worse than the fart. When I tell you what this is later, you guys are just going to die. And then I remember the second time he slept over, he did it again. No.

And I remember telling Kim. No, no, no. And I remember telling Kim, I was like, oh no. He's peeing the bed. Like he's a fucking child. I don't want to hear this. And the bed like he's a child. I don't want to hear this. And yeah, so he was a pee boy. Can we?

We don't need pee boys. I need to know this. Yeah, you gotta tell us what's going on there. The snorting. The prettiest girl is like the biggest snorter on the planet. It's wild. I'm sorry. Queen snort.

OK, sorry. Yeah. No, don't. Don't be. But I do need to know how it is. Oh, I'll tell you later. OK, sorry. Yeah. No, don't be. Yeah, but I do need some of this. Oh, I'll tell you later. Okay, Liv, your turn. Okay, I've been thinking because.

Come on. Well, it's not really a dating stitch. So not a farter, not a pee-petter. Oh, I got it. We have a pee-wetter with a farter. Because we made a song of it. Oh. Joel was on the piano.

Oh, my brother? Yes. Okay. So, I guess we're not really talking about dating stitches, but now we're getting into the intimate. Weird intimate situations. So, this one guy. How many you farted?

Years ago. No, we've already gone through fart and pee. There's only one thing left. What is it? Yeah, what does that mean? The sackclip. Oh, the sackclip. Wait, Chloe, we've never talked with a sackclip with Chloe.

I'm telling you. A sackclip? A sackclip? Chloe, you know. Let me explain. Wait, spell it. OK. You know what a sackclip is.

She will know, and so will the women viewers. So I dated this one guy. We got to the point of. This is a usable episode by the way. Is it? Okay. Okay, we got to the point of intimacy. We're dating, we're fully, a thing, whatever. So anyways, bless him. He kind of had a little bit lower hangers.

Haki sacks. Haki sacks. Good old hacky sacks. So, you know, whatever. Kick those balls. Doing our thing. And I told my friends. I'm like, it's quite the.

The hockey sack. Quite the hockey. Oh my god, when you get hit with the sack, you know it. You get hit by the sack. So we call it the sack clap. And our brothers, we have, one of my brothers is gay. It's three brothers. One of them's gay, and her brother, Joel, is gay.

So we naturally talk to them about our sex lives, whatever. Naturally. Naturally. And, you know, and they're men, so we tell them about the sack clap. And then this is this whole thing, and my cousin Joel gets on the piano. He's very musical.

He's musical, he gives a chord or whatever. It's the sack clap. It's the sack clap. It's a sackclap. It's a sackclap. It's a sackclap. So that's what our family is like. I love that. We tell each other about our sexcapades and make songs. I got to call Kim.

Shh. Be quiet. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, wait. Don't we be like, hey. She took. Hey. Hey.

Hey. Hey. Kimberly. Kimberly! Kimberly! Kimberly! Kimberly! Kimberly! Kimberly!

Kimberly! It's Natalie, Natalie, Olivia, and Chloe. We're on the pod. We're in Chloe and Wonderland. Where are you, bitch? But we're very drunk. What? But we, I had, don't say...

In the afternoon? Yes, you know this is our only time we live we drink all day we were talking about our worst dating experiences remember pee boy who peed the bed you don't have to say names in the townhouse yes yes yes yes I was telling them this story and like nobody believes that someone pees the bed as an adult multiple times. More than once. Well, I think if it was like very drunk.

I don't know if it was very drunk. And also it happened. Had to be. Well, we hope so. Had to be. Olivia had a hacky sack moment where the balls just hacky sacked against her. Vagine.

Vagine or something. What? I don against her. Vagine. Vagine. Or something. I don't know. We're a little drunk. I don't know what's happening. We don't know what's going on. Cam, you should be here. Well, we're not well.

Next app you're joining us. And it's Financial Meetings. Oh, okay. Oh, well, doctor. Sorry, governor. Sorry, doctor. We'll let you be. We will make take this legal jargon elsewhere.

Ballsack. Ballsack. Ballsack. Ballsack. Ballsack. Ballsack. Balls sorry, doctor. We'll let you be. We will make take this legal jargon elsewhere. Balzac. But I'm very jealous.

It sounds like I just got someone walked in the room and said, Chloe says you need to call her back immediately. Oh, my. Oh, well, we miss you. We apologize for the misinformation on such a professional meeting that you're having. I literally am in a room like filled with people. Oh, my God. Oh, well, I hope it's very lucrative for your deep pockets, my darling. We're sorry. My darling. We're waiting for for Natalie to talk about the micros, but she hasn't given us that.

She hasn't given us that tea. Later she will. I'm going to be for some more shots. It's not so bad for them. Everyone. For them. She pluralized it. Kim, you're outing us one by one. She knows. No, just I'm saying for people. Yeah. No, you're right. For the micro-peen audience of the micro-community. They are a community.

We love you. We can't help it. No, you actually. We love you. But you actually can. If anyone wants to donate, please swipe up to Chloe and Wonderland. Yes.

I don't shame. No, we don't either. We don't either. No, we don't either. You don't fuck, but you don't shame. No. OK, bye. Love you don't shame. Okay, bye. Love you, bye. She's like literally probably in a massive business meeting.

She's like literally with like President Trump and she's like... Walls slapping the wall. I'm sorry, but the Haki Sak, we need to affiliate another member of the Haki Sak community. another member of the hockey sock community. Do you guys look at your DMs for dating? I don't. Me neither. I gotta honestly say I have not looked at my DMs in like years and when I do I'm like disappointed.

Disappointed. And like I know there's like a lot of people in there but like they just like I'm like, how they come and approach you is so whack that you're like, agreed. It's ugh, it grosses me out. But what would we want them to say? Is it just because we're not attracted to them and what they say is wack?

No, I honestly, I feel like if they said, hi, like. I think you're pretty as opposed to, yo, you wanna fuck? Yeah. I'm like, wait, what? Totally. Or an emoji. I can't do an emoji. Because they're like testing the water. Do you want me to, because they don't want you to like screenshot or whatever. And they don't want to feel lame.

Exactly. If it was like something of substance, like, hey, like, I see that you're into this or like, hey, like anything normal, I'd be like, all right. I think though, if you have a hottie, it doesn't really matter what they say What if the guy was hot if he was no, no, no Burger boys

I do agree. It was burger boy I would actually do hard eyes back. The amount of times that Olivia and I have had DMs. The amount of times. Me and Olivia have DMs from the same person. That's true. That didn't do their research. They did not do the research. They were clearly f***ing family.

And they sent us the exact same thing. Or like, I'm like, are you on crack? I'm like, sent to my sister Sophia as well. So I will say, if Kim gets a DM We'll say did you get the same one? We do I'm like do you know sisters are checking or We got in the same And we all check these people are man you guys pick one and shoot your shot

Shoot the net really wide. You can't say it again. I think it goes back to the point I said earlier is depending upon how he looks. He gets a pass on certain things. I'm sorry, but that's one of the first things you notice. But obviously, I think organically is the best. If you literally just meet them out. That's a little hard, because especially us three

don't really go out much. I have never, ever dated someone that I've met on social. Oh, really? So it's been all organic or through a friend? Everything has been organic through a friend. And if they've reached out to me socially, but I've been introduced because of a friend. I've never met someone.

The straight up DM. Correct. Never that. Have you? I have. I don't think you have. No, never. Yeah.

She's asleep. No, never. Yeah, I have. Well, speaking of different types of way of meeting, I have been on Raya, it's a dating app, and it's not so successful. Oh, it's not? I thought it was more successful than the rest.

I think I'm the type where, look, when people say it always grinds my gears, when people are like, oh, LA is the worst for dating people, or Miami is the worst. I feel like the outlook should be like, you can meet him anywhere. I could turn around tomorrow, literally, and.A. is the worst for dating people or Miami is the worst. I feel like the outlook should be like you can meet him anywhere. I could turn around tomorrow, literally, and meet him. So to put down the city you're in or put down an app or put down a DM, I just think is putting out to the universe that you're not going to accept it.

So I'm not going to put down anything or any avenue. But that being said, I've tried a dating app and it's not eh, it's whatever. I think I'll probably go off soon just to switch it up. So I don't exclude anything because I just think you're closing yourself off. But that being said, so far it's eh, I don't know. We'll see. But that being said, so far it's, I don't know.

We'll see. I'm open, but I don't love the dating app so far. Guidelines for you? You've been out of the market for a minute. Raising your daughter, focused on that. I don't think you've really branched out at all, to be honest. I don't think you've opened yourself up at all in the last four or five years.

I know, I haven't. And I feel like you haven't either. No, I haven't for sure. You girls are just focusing on your kids. And like don't f***ing talk to me. Yeah, yeah. No, and that's great. That's amazing.

I want to be at that side. That's why I say when you guys have your kids, it's great. I know you wanna find love and a partner and all that stuff, but like at least you have your wonderful babies that I love so much. And you, you are the best auntie to them, but I want to find it, but I'm not desperate to find it. Yes. You know, like when I do, I do, I don't feel that at all. Both of you are content. And I think that's the beauty. And you girls, I have to say, as your best friends,

amazing mothers. Honestly, I know people say that, and I'm not being biased. They honestly, I had to look at camera for that. They are the most amazing mothers. I look up to you, I've learned from you. I feel like when it's my time, I will have the best teachers or questions or whatever. You girls are really, really amazing.

Takes a village. I think in anything, a relationships and family. And if it wasn't for you girls, like just even the ability to talk about people when you need to talk about that, we all need to. We have that outlet. Well, even we need to vent about our kids, or like, oh my gosh, this happened, or my sister did this. It could be any relationship you need that circle where

you can vent to. It doesn't have to just be a man. It has to just be a relationship. And I think if we didn't have that village, it would be really hard. You guys saying that how you guys are foreigners, and if it's not for you two being together, what would you guys saying that how you guys are foreigners. And if it's not for you two being together, what would you guys have?

And that we found each other. It's so good that we've all found each other. Because if you guys weren't there, what would we be a party of five? That's crazy to think about. We need you guys. So we all play such a factor and role in each other's lives. And I don't think we would really survive if we didn't have each other. So I love you guys. I love you too.

So much. I really do. Honestly, I cherish you and our friendship. And yeah, now we're getting sappy. I love you guys. Yeah, you guys for doing Chloe and wonderland with me. And for getting a little wasted. We do drink and so we are probably way more just communicative than we normally would be honestly I have to say we've learned more things about each other. I think Natalie is at capacity. okay bye we love you see you later