Upstream - Episode 19: Tomorrow never dies

Episode Date: October 26, 2021

This week, Kill James Bond, three trans people from Britain, ponder the eternal question: What if a media tycoon.... was bad? Join us for an in-depth investigation into Brosnan Bond's newest Technique (Walking up to the villain in a social setting and asking him directly if he's evil), and we encounter a Guy for the ages. Find bonus episodes at our reasonably-priced patreon! https://www.patreon.com/killjamesbond *SHIRT ALERT* We are accepting pre-orders for a new shirt design until the end of the day on October 31st, 2021 -- get it here! https://www.killjamesbond.com/store/p/kill-james-bond-presents-the-moore-pre-order *WEB DESIGN ALERT* Tom Allen is a friend of the show (and the designer behind our website). If you need web design help, reach out to him here:  https://www.tomallen.media/   Find us at https://killjamesbond.com and https://twitter.com/killjamesbond

HOT! Before I let you listen to this podcast, I need to let you know that we have merchandise available right now at www.killjamesvond.com slash store. We are currently taking pre-orders for the Roger Moore shirt, commemorating the Sesh Gremlin qubit. This t-shirt was designed by Arcana Goat on Twitter and it is a fantastic pre-orders close on the 31st of October, so get there. A sub. Additionally, we have 77 pairs of the Kronstein Rosette and Goodnight Cross enamel pins airs of the cronstein rosette and goodnight cross in namal pins, designed by AtnoePasaran on Twitter.

Ready to go. They are in my house right now. This isn't a pre-order. You order them and I will send you them as soon as possible. Unless you order the more pre-order and the pins at the same time, because you're only paying for shipping once, so we'll just hold onto it until we can send them both together. Also Patreon supporters will find a discount code if you scroll down your Patreon feed, or a little bit. Thank you! Go and buy my stuff! My wife, my wife. My wife. Mwah. Hello.

We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching.

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We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are watching. We are Alice Cautwell Kelly joining me are Abigail Thorne and Devon. We are? Hello! We are watching tomorrow never dies. My wife. He says it so many times.

So, so many times. My wife. Never have we had a villain that is such a heavy wife guy and also does kill his wife during the course of the movie. Oh, yeah. We'll get to that. We've got a married villain before. Yeah.

Wow. That's a great question. I don't think we have. Because Sanchez, that was his girlfriend, not. Yeah. So. That was his girlfriend, not... Yeah. Yeah. So... ... ... Drank was married, Goldferr is in his name.

Drank was in his name. ... ... ... He was a confirmed Dracula. Shut the fuck up. Can I get that isolated? Thank you.

No, go on. He's the first villain we've had. He's joined in Holy Match Money. That's right. And that goes well as far as I'm aware. Absolutely. Absolutely. It's tomorrow in every dice.

The second, the Bronznan Bond movie, the difficult second album from Golden Eye, a movie which we liked and enjoyed, even while recognizing all of the ways in which it was terrible. And so this is the movie about what if the press was bad? What? What if that? But we begin in media source on a terrorist arms

fair on the Russian border, which is a bunch of suspicious looking guys standing around some weapons. But the phrase terrorist arms fair fair just sent me off on a sort of like 10 minutes spiral of like terrorist. How do I advertise that? Let's see. Terrorist arms fair on the posters. Yeah. It's at an airstrip. So you can do it. You fly in. I mean, I had a terrorism, but then I didn't get in.

I had to go with my backup and do a masters in English at Durham. Yeah, of course, once you got to Durham, there was the terrorist freshers fair. I haven't lost us in English at Durham. We'll get we'll get there. So at this terrorist arms bizarre, we know we know Bond is there, of course. We also see a guy who I can't stress enough is white is a white guy called Henry Gupta because they changed that character in the script from being an Indian guy to being a white guy but they did not change the name. And you know

what? Good because they would not have treated that guy well if he's. Oh no, no, no, no, no, I'm absolutely not. This level is just like looking motherfucker. He does look a bit like Schlaverschie's yet. Yeah. He is purchasing some ideology and what he's purchasing is essentially the use with some heavy ideology because the line that they say about him is he that he was big involved in student politics at Berkeley in the 60s. Yep, yep.

And then he now sells his ideology from money. Or what else? Yes, money. So it was his politics for cash. These two, these goddamn students protesting academic, kind down on freedom of speech. It's terrible. I mean, we don't actually know what he was doing

in Berkeley in the 60s. He could have been in the Symbianese Liberation Army for all we know. But like, yeah, it has the fucking... His protest think TERFs, that's what he was doing. Yeah, he was. So we see M in the control room with a sort of like very jowly admiral. Truly. Yes, we parmer.

Yes, we parmer. You and the fucking scenery. I think we should go to war. Sort of like, just like abs right now. Like rattling a saber. And so a juicer has sort of hot headedness. They're like, they fire a missile from a royal navy frigate into Russia to the Russian border, which trying to puzzle out the geography of that, which is going to be. It's like a bird's nest. It's like a bird's nest. It's like a bird's nest.

It's like a bird's nest. It's like a bird's nest. It's like a bird's nest. It's like a bird's nest. It's like a bird's nest. from a Royal Navy frigate into Russia to the Russian border, which trying to puzzle out the geography of that, which is going to be. It's like that scene in no time to die with no, we're together. Yeah, no one knows what missiles do. Now, it's pointing history. So the footage that they show off the missiles is he deers. So it's these two. The footage that they show off the Royal Navy Bond film. Oh, full.

This movie loves the Navy, the Navy loves it back. And so there's a lot of like we see this entire process from the admiral picking up the red phone in the command center to a guy literally turning a big switch from piece to war, which is just genuinely so good. I think a incredible ideological moment. And like all of the sort of procedures for launching this missile, just in order to, like essentially it's James Bond faces the camera and goes, hey kids, wouldn't it be cool if you joined the Royal Navy?

Wow. They have these cool missiles and you get to like, uh, savoury cool things. So yeah, they fire the missiles and at this point they realize too late that one of the things on display at the terrorist arms fair is a set of Russian nuclear torpedoes. And that if the missile hits these it's gonna like explode and it's gonna create a nuclear explosion, right? So it's too late to call this missile back and bond who's codenamed by the way, is White Knight. Yeah, they do keep saying White Knight and I liked that a lot.

That's very fun. Yeah, White Knight, it does some action stuff. He shoots some men, he punches a couple of men and then he steals the the fighter jet that these Nuclear torpedoes are attached to jet now Fly jet and he does some things The jacket is gone on it is a nice leather jacket. It's not as nice as Zenia's from Golden Eye. No, it's not.

No. And yeah, at this point, he escapes and then the guy in the back seat of the jet fighter fries to strangle him with something because he was just there the whole time. He had been punched unconscious by him on earlier and he wakes up in the back of this plane and is just like instantly okay I'm gonna kill James Bond. I got to kill this guy. I appreciate that fucking effort. Immediate cronstein rose that contender but yes.

Backseat of a fucking jet and you're like I'm gonna kill the guy who's driving this I reckon. Yep, yep gonna do that. Bond for some reason this plane has an ejector seat for the, an ejector lever for the ejector seat in the back with a switch in the front. Yeah. So Bond ejects the guy out of the back.

While this guy has a ligature around Bond's neck. I know, I'm like, this guy's, you're dead. You have just executed a complete hanging maneuver on yourself. Yeah, James Bond has accidentally outwitted the hair point. The world's first reverse hanging. You feel you've had something up rather than drop someone down. It's quite mechanically a clever way you've done Bond. But he fires him into the other enemy

jet, which is now above them, and that takes out that as well. And then he's like, oh, tell the animal where he'd like to have his missiles delivered. And they're like, why are you seeing that music down the thing? Yeah, yeah. It's very, it's very, it's very, he sees the shooting double-length ever. Yeah, exactly, exactly. It's, there's not really that much bond about this, other than like, I guess the idea that MI6 and M are sort of like more cautious and thoughtful than the Navy are, which is, you know, again, sort of baby's first themes. But then, then we get into the opening titles of this movie, which I can only describe as

I find a computer indispensable. Yeah, there's a lot of computers happening. Yeah, they're the screens. The things that's crazy. I fucking hate the intros to all of the Bond films. I hate that they're still going. I don't like them at all. And all of the modern ones have taken the single worst part of the older ones, which is a lot of very,

very oblique references to themes that simply aren't present in the rest of the movie. And none of them have maintained the one good part, which is full nipple at all times. It says so many just raw titties in all of the fucking Connery ones. But also, the cowards from the... These naked women here are made of computers. Yeah, they are. Because again, themes, there are themes in these movies. And one of these themes is technology, it's computers.

And sometimes a computer is a sexy lady, and sometimes it's a gun. I don't think this film really has that for very, very artistic things. It's got motifs, but I don't think it's like, really trying to say anything the way that Golden I was. Oh, no, no, no, no. I didn't pick up one of it as.

Yeah, well, anyway, it's a midsummer as well. Yeah, Cheryl Crow. It's, I mean, Golden I was always gonna be a midsummer as well. Yeah, Cheryl Crowe. It's, I mean, Golden I was always gonna be a tough act to follow, but like, hmm. You also get this weird thing to talk about the music for saying, you also get this weird thing where the, the composer had nothing to do with the theme song up here during the credits.

So like earlier films, they would try to work in like light motifs or references from the song throughout the rest of it. And the way this guy got around it is that he just composed another possible intro song, and they just put it during the end credits. Right, it had like motifs from that the entire way through instead. Oh, that's why... That's why I never knew it. That's why it's not. Okay. It's very strange. Okay, well, we go from this to the South China Sea. And you know what's cool?

The Royal Navy. Is the Royal Navy and the Royal Navy? In the Royal Navy. You get to wear like shoulder boards to work. You get to have a lot of like offices with upper class accents telling you what to do. You get to like flip a lot of switches on a big sonar panel. And that's that.

And so we are great. It's just like being a podcaster but with waves. Exactly. Exactly. Different kind of waves. We're on the frigate HMS Devonshire in the South China Sea. When it immediately gets opened. Because this is a great way to show that the Royal Navy is cool, is to show them getting owned in repeatedly.

Yes. Just non-stop route them. It's quite rapid. Using a stealth ship, this is quite sleek, stealth ship, this sort of like quite sleek sort of like angular vessel that is shadowing HMS Devonshire. It's crew launch a big drill. Yes. The water. Yes. At just the time that they are misdirecting the Devonshire to believe that it's in international waters, but actually it's in international waters,

but actually it's in Chinese waters. So the Chinese Air Force come and try and intercept the Devonshire. Do you have a drop of the guy saying, we're in international waters? Oh, fuck, I feel like I'm in the middle of the guy saying we're in international waters. Yeah, so we see that they've been misdirected by a Gupta from the opening scene and also our villain for the film, Elliot Carver, who's still in shadow. One of the things that we saw at the terrorist arms fair was a CIA satellite encoder. Yeah, the light to decoding machine. Yeah, it does things with satellites being oriented, sure, but they're using this to deflect

the the Devonshire into Chinese waters. And the guys in the Devonshire are like, well, we're definitely in the Tash of Wars. The Chinese have got it wrong. And also something I want to flag up is there's a, there's two actors with bit parts in this opening. Julian Rhyme's talk. Julian Rhyme's talk, maybe he's back.

Oh, that is. He's back. Mack from Green Wing is the second time you've seen him on the podcast. It's always good to see him. Also, he's wearing a little name tag Raw maybe name tag and his name tag says JTut. So this is him Playing himself really

Yeah, Jean Rhyme was in the Rhone Avery as the sonar of racing was killed in action in the Do you know who else is in this scene and has one line? Gerard Butler Gerard Butler. Gerard Butler, baby. Gerard Butler is the one Scottish man in this scene who will turn around later and be like, what, Sankhan Captain. Yeah, yeah.

She's great. Fantastic. You guys really watched these movies a lot more closely than I do. You're organizing actors. Hey, I like to see it when an actor works their way up from the sport. There is a little bit of ideology here, right? In a time when we're constantly doing freedom of navigation

sailing, right? We're sailing through, about the Royal Navy through, like, the fucking Straice of Hormuz or the Straice of Taiwan. And we often get these things wrong and either deliberately or accidentally end up not in international waters, but in say Iran or China's territorial waters. It's very interesting to have a movie that goes, oh yeah, this happens, but when it does because of naughty ghosts, it's literally because of an evil satellite. The satellite looks evil. On another satellite and makes it go wrong. The boat looks evil as well. The boat looks fine. It's nice. It's no wet blowfelds fucking

Legion of Doom base. I forgot about wet blowfeld. I fully forgot his name and I said I'm not a fire blowfeld I'm sorry, wet blow fell. It's just, it can be a bad blow. Wet blow fell. Wet blow fell. Space blow fell. They just went through a lot of blow fell to me early. Early more.

So TV blow fell. It's coordinating this one. And a TV zone blow fell. So the Chinese Air Force intercepting this Royal Navy ship, they drop a drill into the water, remotely controlled drill. In order to make it seem like the Chinese Air Force has torpedoed this ship. The thing about this drill, and I love the most, other than everything, is how just fully and completely impossible it is.

They shoot it out of this torpedo tube, it hits the boat and still maintains enough momentum to drill through the boat and then start drilling up into the rest of the boat. This weapon is obviously impossible, but it does stand apart from later movies impossible weapons by being cool as fuck. It's also, we see it being controlled by our chief henchmen for this movie, House of Stampers. Yes. I love this guy. House of Stampers. Big, he's big, he's blonde, he's German. That is all you need to know

about House of Stampers. He is Roman. Number five. Yeah. The original script for this movie had it so that he had suffered a brain injury that made him register pain as pleasure and pleasure as pain. And then they decided sick. That's too stupid. We're not going to do that. He's just going to be a big guy. And luckily we never we never heard the, you know, we never heard of that idea ever again. Never comes. Anyway, never comes back. We, so this sinks the Devonshire just in time for it to like get off a transmission, blaming its own sinking on the Chinese falsely. And then we see our guy, our main guy, they transmit the position that they believe they are in when they sank. Yes.

So, but they never find the thing. Yes. They have 17 miles away from where they think they are. And then TV Bluffell has this like ridiculous, like where he's like meeting his staff and he's just being so comically. Oh, I have so much fun. This is the way he enters the room for the first time. He enters essentially a Zoom call saying...

A morning, my golden retrieval. What kind of havoc shall the Carba Media Group create in the world today? Which is such a fucking alpha way to start any conversation. Good morning. All of you are dogs. What evil should we do? No, I will genuinely, genuinely, I will point out that the name of this scene in the scene list that I used to follow these things is Carver receives updates from his diabolical

team, which is just right. Yeah, so he's like smearing politicians, he's releasing bad software. His, he owns the shitty, there's a shitty Microsoft joke. Are we ready to release our new software? Yes, sir. As requested, a lot of bugs, which means people will be forced to upgrade for years. There you go. And...

1999, man, you could get cheap heat off of a Bill Gates joke like that. So he owns the, his name is Elliot Carver. He's played by famous British actor Jonathan Price. And he owns the Carver media group, which is basically like news called Rupert Murdoch Shit. Like he owns this media conglomerate. It's about to launch their new channel. They're about to launch GB news.

They're gonna have work watch. It's gonna be big. They're gonna get Paul Joseph Watson on and it's going to be the biggest thing ever. And he's doing evil shit. And he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he was carrying around this wireless keyboard that he finds on very fast so that you know that he's technology. Oh, and we also see that, that he tells her, Samper, to shoot the survivors of the Devon to using Chinese ammunition and film it.

Yes. And film it. Yeah, because he's going to report it so heenture using Chinese ammunition and film it. Yes. And film it. Yeah, because he's going to report it so he can be the first one to report. Yeah, he's orchestrating this, this whole crisis. Also, I will point out there is one line in this movie. The context isn't important, but a guy does say to Elliott Carver. Consider him slimed. Great. Fantastic. Perfect thing, perfect thing. Also one, one other thing to know about Alex Carver, he loves saying the word delicious. Whenever anything kind of goes his way, he will just fully say delicious.

Just nice. Yeah, Jonathan Price has a fantastic time. He's having this kind of like, sort of like breathlessly like Megalome and Iacore, it's great. Yeah, he's having somebody carry this film. F Yeah, he's having so much, he carries this film. Fully, he's just so unapologetically completely evil throughout the entire thing. Like he doesn't even try to not be.

At one point, he's wearing a black turtleneck and a black male jacket at the same time. He's actually an interesting acting choice because the lines as they are written would lend themselves very well to someone like very slowly intoning now what have I shall you. So it was a really interesting choice for him to blow fault. Yeah, yeah, it's very interesting choice for him to play LA covers always like pretty happy and like having a great time. Yeah, yeah, evil bitch like. So obviously at this point, 20 minutes into the bond movie, you

may start to wonder, where is James Bond? And where James Bond is, of course, pumping. He is in Cambridge. He is having sex with a Danish professor who is teaching him Danish by the means of having sex with him. Yeah. Now there are a couple of things going on here but the one that I want to draw out here is something which I first noticed in this scene but will come up in every subsequent Pierce Brosnan sex scene. And which is, oh I know exactly what you're going to say. We see sex scenes for the first time with Brosnan.

So they have to work out how you're going to act this. Pierce Brosnan has decided at some point, I'm going to have a move. His move is he bites a woman's shoulder. Once you notice that he starts doing this, you will never be able to not notice it. He always does this. It's like Harry Bond only having heavy attack

and light attack. This man has one sexual move and it's to fight a woman shoulder like that's a normal thing to do. Wait, what do you want to do? Do you not do that? I don't, I don't do that. I don't only do that.

That's the last episode. I don't only bite a woman's shoulder. It's not your first and only move, right? He breaks away from kissing her, bites her shoulder once and then goes back to kissing her, which is for fucking weird set of actions. Just to cheer up a little for a second, I don't know. Yeah, so it seems normal to me. I think it's a little for a second, I don't know. Yeah, so it seems normal to me.

I think at this point, yeah. Money penny rings him up and is like, you're like eating pussy. I want to say something in support of Money Penny. I quite like her a lot. I really like Samantha Bond. I did actress. Fantastic.

Funny name to be in a Bond film, Lowell Samantha, Samantha Bond, but also just very, very nice. He really does come across this quite legitimate. It's a shame about the very, very normal collection line from the last one. It's a shame about the cunning linguist line from this one. You always wear a cunning linguist, James. I don't, I think they use that joke again. Oh, God.

And then it's more of a shame about the next line. Oh yeah. Walks over to hear this last exchange. Yeah. Then as you say, money penny over here is from the command center. I mean, M over here is from the command center to money penny going like, oh, you sure do you like

to eat pussy, James Bond? Walks over and says... Money per' goes, don't ask. And M replies, don't tell. Which is... Which was in case you're unaware, don't ask, don't tell, was a cleansing directive from February of 1994 about being gay in the US on force. It was made in Pussy gay. Illegal to ask, sort of,

for Central Soyuz, whether or not they're gay, but it also made it illegal to be openly gay in the middle. I think it's very funny. If you take that line entirely as red, which is a M-haring money penny, make a joke about bond-easing Pussy. And going, you know, is Bond gay? Is this going to be in Percy?

That was just a gay to be Percy. I mean, maybe she doesn't know that Money Penny is talking to Bond and is therefore suggesting that Money Penny is gay for talking about. No, because she says James. She says, you always were a cunning linguist, James. No, she's calling bond gay for Easing Puss. Fantastic. I would like to read this one line from the Don't I still have a computer page, which is very funny to me. Not funny, but also just bad. The policy prohibited

people who quote demonstrate a propensity or intent to engage in homosexual acts from serving in the armed forces because their presence would create an unacceptable risk to the high standards of morale, good order and discipline that are the essence of military capability. If they reckon you're going to be too gay, gay. Yeah, I'm so gay, I'm actually a threat to military being. Because when I was rescinded by the way. For a pen city to, oh, god, propensity or intent. Pen, no, no, no, no. Guess when that was rescinded from being... I know when that was rescinded, so I'm not gonna get it.

I know, no. I'm talking to you. I'm talking to you. It was, it was 2011. I'm talking generally to the audience, especially young ones who may not be aware of that. Fuck, isn't it? Or when the 11.

Yes, anyway. Apparently we do. About this James Bond movie we're watching. What? Yeah. I don't want to talk about this movie. I've wrote you one talk about this movie. Yes.

He swallows it hookline and sinker. And when he finds out from tomorrow, Elliot Carver's newspaper about the sailors being machine gunned is like, right, we are sending in the fleet, M you have 48 hours to investigate. We then cut to Bond and M in her car being like escorted through traffic, right? And she mentions that Carver's wife, my wife used to date Bond.

Yeah. My wife. She was an old flame before she was married. And so she tells him, use that. Like, I'll give you the whole drop, right? Use your relationship with Mrs. Carver if necessary. I doubt it. She'll remember me. Remind her.

Then pump her for information. Yeah, now can I also get the drop from the previous? Oh, I have that set up. I have that set up. One movie apart. Because I think you're a sexist, misogynist dinosaur. Pump her for information.

What a fucking turnaround. It's so cool, it's so cool. It's almost enough to make you disbelieve the sincerity of the original line. Hmm. A bit of a puniation. So the vibe is, Elliot Carver's newspaper reported on the killing of the British sailors by the Chinese government. And they said, our source is the Vietnamese government. But it was like a really quick turnaround.

Like, Carver reported on this a few hours before the Vietnamese even found them. So it was like, we think Carver may have had something to do with this. We think he might have sent the signal that we tracked that sent the boat off course. So go to Carver's base in Hamburg, pump his wife, and then just just find out what the deal is. And don't see any of that. Em, sit down and there's like, all right, Shagger, you're gonna have to call up your ex and start pumping her.

Also, I mean, Money Penny hands in his travel documents and stuff, and she makes another little joke that's like, I guess you'll have to decide how much pumping is required. Which, again, this is the same money penny who is like, you probably shouldn't sexually harass me in the last movie. Again, I'm still not a perfect turnaround. One minute.

She has a fucking little travel desk in the front of the car, which is very funny. There's a nice, there's, well, there's an interesting line where the PM, sorry, M says, the PM would have my head if he found out you were investigating Elliot Carver because we get this impression that like Carver's, Carver's news media empire can like topple governments, that is the phrase that Bond uses.

He's, because when they go bond, what do you know about Elliot Carver, TV glove, he owns two- Shackers wife. Yeah. It's a real being has bonded about trans people. Yeah. Right. None of us even know what they are yet, but this guy hasn't. Have you been invented yet by the CIA?

Yeah, absolutely. So MI6 are sort of subversing democratic oversight, but what about you? The name of it, you're going to yell at me over the, over pull you off here, but I, oh, yeah, that's the dumb shame, but I used that phrasing. Oh, I just flashed like a fucking end of my life. I exposed your glowing weak point. Yeah. Jesus. Anyway, I'm sorry about pulling you off tomorrow.

I'll never die. The name it was supposed to be tomorrow never lies because the newspaper is called tomorrow however And it's dumb shit. I've ever heard no this is even dumber which is that someone misspelled at some point and they were like oh Great what's the? The attention point which is every single one of the fucking Brosden movies are the same name. They're all named the same. Tomorrow never lives another die today. It's ridiculous. I...

Tomorrow never lies would have at least been slightly different. Anyway, Bond goes to Hamburg. Right, and he picks up his rental car from a desperately old. Q is literally looking like a tall toy in the scene. It's a desperately old. My man old. As my little. My man is synassing.

I mean, Desmond Lohallen was fully gray in his first appearance in fucking from rock children. This is all the rumours at this point. Yeah. Get around the Q-Cards problem though, by giving him a clipboard and putting the scripts on that. in fucking from this point. Yeah, yeah, get around the cue cards problem though by giving him a clipboard and putting the scripts on that.

Okay, fully. So way more elegant, but like he's in his undercover as bonds like car rental agent and he shows in the car. And let me show you this is not a good car. It's not a sexy car. It's like I get so. BMW 750, it's shit car. It's like I get so much of the style of this movie is so so dated.

It's it's actually more dated than gold and I which is older because it's so sort of like middle manager vibe even stuff like bonds ties. And just like. Yeah. Not good. Yeah, cause so we've said before that the James Bond films are about like marketing things towards your dad.

And I think the filmmakers at this point have decided that your dad is a fucking loser who sucks. Mm-hmm. And that's how they're gonna market him. And to live. Absolutely, absolutely miss on my father, I know you listen to this.

Um. What is also funny about this scene is that Bond tries to like joke around with cube, like all of his jokes are terrible. And he's the only one laughing at them. And so the effect is a bit partridge. It's genuinely a little bit. I just found out that it does not look like a pastoral. 83 during this movie.

That has to violate some kind of labor law, doesn't it? Give the guy like a tart and blanket and a big fucking, you know, like this is a penalty one. Is this penalty one? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So the car, it has a bunch of like the usual weapons and shit in there, but also it has a female voice that tells them what to do and nag some, which is subject to some innuendo.

And also, you can drive it remotely from your phone. And Bond is like, let's see how well she responds to my touch. Like an absolute fucking non. It's just weird. It's weird. It's Bond fingers the BMW. He fucks the car. He has sex with the car. He fucks the car.

He has sex with a car. He demonstrates that he can drive it remotely and then he goes... He goes to Elliot Carver's party. Yeah, which is, I genuinely wrote down, is this supposed to be cool? Is this what 1999 thought that cool looked like? Because it's... Oh, it's just that. That, it's weirdly tacky.

This sort of giant screens everywhere, but they're the sort of like free LCD, like flat screen screens. The Wastes are wearing newsprint tuxedos. Yeah, we're in this like really weird era where like, we are kind of groping our way towards the new aesthetic, but also the Matrix hasn't come out yet. And like really kind of codified what about a set of things can be.

The grossing is mostly doing the groping part of the grossing. Yeah, yeah. So it's kind of anything goes fashion wise. We're kind of waiting the next fashion moment and the very true. It's kind of the wall of the meantime. It looks a bit like the rich people in Brazil.

Yeah. So it's very 90s this movie. It's the 1990s. Yeah. Yeah. So Bond walks up to Elliot Carver and introduces himself with his full real name on James Bond. And then immediately when he uses his real name, so funny. He's supposed to be a banker, right? But unlike Roger Moore, who was James Stock or whatever, he couldn't even give him like a fun name. It's just like, he walks up to him, goes, my name is James Bond, I am an agent

for the Secret Intelligence Service. I know you have sunk the ship in light about its position. He blatantly accuses Carva with some like really shit puns and Carver's like, what? Just straight to his face in the middle of this party. First thing he does is go up and accuse him and Carver's like, what? And then he immediately goes and talks to Carver's wife. I mean, we're not going to get up here. He immediately says, did you send that ship off course? Like, could you do that? Like, do you have, did you send that ship off course? Like, could you do that? Like, do you have the power to send that flight off course?

It's like just just being very subtle. Also Michelle Yo shows up. Yeah, using us as as way Lynn from the new China news agent as a slightly more competence by. Yeah, she actually bothers to live not about her name, but she does bother to lie about why she's there. So obviously Bond now has to sort of fool his prime directive. Pampyr for information.

So he goes and talks to Paris Carver, who is my wife. Terry Hatcher. Oh, Paris Carver. Yeah, she's wearing this sort of like quite intense dress. It's not family answer level, but it's quite nice. Mm-hmm. There's a big quark over her head counting down to when she's going to be killed. Yeah, it's bad.

She immediately slapped him. Mm-hmm. That was funny. I genuinely think, right? The idea of like one of bold, one of bold, one of Bond's old flames. We're all falling apart here. Yeah, one of bold on flames. It could be an interesting thing. Like the idea he just kind of like disposes of women, but nothing like happens to them unless he gets them killed. They just kind of go on with their lives. It's like,

it could be quite interesting, not in this movie though, because she seems to be. First thing, Dustin plays it as like, like she wasn't just another conquest, like he plays it as if like, he might have had some feelings for this woman. Like, yeah, yeah. Which is the first season, he says, I often wondered how I'd feel

when I saw you again, and it's like, oh, it's interesting to hear you talk about your feelings as if you have them. Yeah, we have an interesting bit about this, Lysa. But the other thing about Terry Hatcher, the actress, is she said that she accepted the role in this movie to fulfill her then husband's lifelong dream of being married to a bond girl. Oh, that's fun. They don't like that at all.

I don't like that at all. Really quickly because she had an unexpected pregnancy and she later expressed that she didn't really like the part saying it was an artificial kind of character to be playing and you don't get any sort of special satisfaction from it. I mean, playing it is literally a male fantasy. It's just great. Just great. It's remarkable.

She's treated so badly in this fucking film. Yeah. So she kind of brushes him off. She tells him like, you know, I married Elliot Carver instead. Because he said he'd loved me. Oh, the line is really good. You're not in my life anymore. I've made my bed and you don't sleep in it,

which is a good line. Yeah, I've made my bed and you don't sleep anymore. It's such a good line. So at this point, we then see, like, so Carver is a trackstown. Woo, woo. Ah. like so Carver is a track down And this was set up separately or if you made another button

No, no, no, it's a button they wrote Yeah, I just got my wife. My wife. My wife. In that was like I hundred percent know she's made a button for this. Oh, I mean, I could change it to random if you want. I could do my wife. My wife. My wife. My wife. My wife. Yeah, she's that is good. Cause then I don't know which one. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. Jarring shift in tone. Because Jarring shift in tone because when Paris Carver is introduced to Whalen, she makes what I basically understood to be a rape joke. Yes, fully. I have the drop here with the whole line.

I'm thinking of getting Whalen behind a news desk. That's wonderful. I'm sure she won't resist too much. Yeah, that's a weird one. And the response to this is like two seconds of Bond drinking his drink. Like, don't know about that one, Chief. Which is fucking weird considering Bond is both the viewpoint character and also a canonical rapist.

But I do kind of get the idea of like, that's a fucking weird thing to say. Like I didn't even, it took me a second to puzzle that one out. Like, oh, you meant get her behind a news desk. Like, you were having sex with her on the, on the, I mean, if it was set up or if there was any kind of pay off for Elliott Carver, like, it behaves inappropriately towards his female staff members, maybe he's not, but he saying. But he doesn't. He doesn't.

No, it's just strange. So anyway, sexless, actually, and then bond again, it goes, did you sing that ship, King? Yeah. Incidentally, I am a British spy. Uh, how's it going? You're committing crimes. Yeah, speaking of a power, please.

Clearly into my the fell if you never committed a crime. I can't see you for just great. Just great. I'm not a great response, which is to have bond taken out and beaten up. He does it. He like he leaves and then goes to her shdamper and goes, yeah, just haven't taken out beaten, please. So they like a couple of large men and this guy, man, take Bond away under the pretense of him, how he have phone call and kick the shit out of him. They call a stampa while they're doing this.

And stampa says, make him uncomfortable. Which is a fucking hilarious line because like, okay, fine, he's good. Honey, whatever, but like, when you say, make him uncomfortable. What I figure is like, okay, fine, he's good. Honey, whatever, but like, when you say, make him uncomfortable, what I figure is, like, ask him about his father. Make too much eye contact for the sim.

Put him in a slightly too short chair. Yeah. Ask him about his gender. Ask him what he would think about when you're most known? For fucking hell. Do you imagine yourself as a British agent when you're a cop? What do you vow when you're a cop? Dr. Stamper, do I say?

We do see that. We do see cover asks Paris about Bond and she does cover for him. She's like, ah, he's my ex. She doesn't say what she knows, which is that he's a secret agent. Yes. So Bond gets beaten, but of course turns the tables on the goons and beats them up. And he cuts the power during Elliott Carva's big launch of his channel. Alia is doing the most insane speech I've ever seen. He's doing like children's cartoon, like the evil he's been incredible.

He literally says at one point, what do I ask in return? Total utter worldwide domination. But like his thing, right, is to like kind of do Bond villain, but then a line that's like, I deceived you. So he's, all of his lines, like, total domination of news,

or of the truth. Yeah. It's just like, what do I crave? Power in order to make people closer together. It's just like so fun. It's stupid, it's stupid. The writing is not subtle. Like, my writing on philosophy tube of evil characters is more subtle than this. And writing is not subtle. Like my writing on philosophy tube of evil characters

is more subtle than this. And that is saying something. So, Carver's very upset. He fires on the spot. His PR lady has a fantastic dress, by the way. And then bond escapes. And then sort of defaults back to nothing else to do bond mode, which is as far as I can tell, to sit in his hotel room in his shirt drinking half a bottle of smurn off. He is fucking drinking that smurn off. Yeah, absolutely. He has gone through like fully half of a bottle.

He's so low in that chair. Like there's no way that's his first shot. He's already had at least one more teeny that night. Like, my man is both. He's not healthy. Oh yeah. And then Paris at Elliot's insistence comes to see Bond. The vibe is that like, she's, like,

Carva sends her to pump him for information. Yes. Yeah, quite how much pumping Elliot had in mind, I'm not sure, because he just get very cross about the fact that they do have sex and it's pretty uninspired, to be honest. Yeah, I mean, there is a kind of nice film while moment where he sort of throws it back

in her face with like, you've made your bed. And she says, I'm standing here in your doorway. And in his fucking shirt sleeves, P.I. style, he just goes, we'll turn around and go home. Which is cool. I like that. But of course, he does then fuck her and and bites her shoulder. He does that again. He does it again every time. Again, do you not? I mean, I wouldn't make a point of it in the way that he does is the thing. It's weird

to have it as a discreet move. and the way that he acted is always like, I'm going to engage sex move now. And it's just like, I'm not sure about making the perfect Minecraft-y ignoys way on the person. Thank you, Devon. I'm gonna feel really so I've gone to the next time I do that, Matt. I'm gonna switch to any Minecraft drinking noise. Thank you. Whap, wham. So Bond, Bond, Bond who can presumably get it up after like two thirds of a bottle of bots. It's quite impressive actually.

He tries to buy her shoulder like falls over across the room. Earlier on Avy said that this was quite uninspired and I wasn't sure if you meant the sex or the story arc, but honestly, both of us are the whole thing. Terry Hatcher, acting this like a woman who was acting it because her husband wanted to have sex with a bond girl, which is to say badly. Now, it's a shame as well, because she's a very beautiful woman. Yeah. It's a way that her husband needed an excuse.

She's very active. But she tells Bond how to get into Carver's secret lab. Yeah, there's a secret lab on the software of the building. Meanwhile, back in the secret lab, white goopter, feeling like a white goopter, and Elliot Carver immediately see through Bond's cover. And this I like a see through Bond's cover. And this I like a lot.

Bond's got a perfect employment record. 10 years, he's crossed every T's, dotted every I, which means government agent. I mean, yeah, I'm pretty good. I know I'll give up was good. So Bond does, in fact, infiltrate the secret lab. Right. Finds a shitload of drugs and porn.

Yeah, he finds the goopter has a safe full of heroin, heroin, cocaine, heroin, German soft core pornography and the lector decoding machine. Using drugs? Yeah, I wrote down typical German work safe. Yeah, absolutely. It's a shitload of money, a shitload of drugs. Unlike George Mason, he does not stop to read the porn. Very, very funny. That's true.

God, I love it. God, he really did do that. For like, I was very funny. I'm too. Yeah. So the, the lecture decal that you said. Oh, I missed a bit. I'll go right ahead.

Which is when they, when they cut their C-StreetBonds cover, he's like, cover goes, okay, podcast a looking guy. Did my wife know that this guy was a spy? And he goes, okay, well, I instantly can sort that audio out. And he plays the recording of her referencing him being a spy. And this guy who throughout the whole movie is like my wife. My wife is instantly like we got a killer.

We got to kill this woman. We got a crime right now. Yes, done. I got a fucking guy. I sent her to see him. On the assumption that she didn't know he was a spy in order to spy on him. Yeah, anyway, we've got to kill not really sure why this guy sent her the adult. It's really not very good. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, right? Wait, but Bond takes the like to decoding machine. He tries to fight us way out as he does. He encounters Michelle Yo in the leather cat suit on her way in,

because she is also a spy. And the two of them have to like get out separately. They keep doing this thing in this film where they play the James Bond theme of really ordinary moments. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, under a door or like plays with his card, Are they play the James Bond theme of really ordinary moments? Yes. Like James have this written down. Yes, under a door or like plays with his card because like, DERDERDERDERD!

Like, just a man doing normal shit. The way he gets out of the building is to jump onto a little wheeled cart thing on his stomach and like slide across the floor. And they hit you with a Bond theme for this. And I wrote down, this is the least deserved Bond theme since Connery having it while he was searching our hotel room. It's probably just like, yeah, this is just playing in this guy's head. Only did that because they didn't have enough music to fill the fucking bill.

Also Bond does this thing and it's becoming more and more apparent to me in the Bros. News, but he has this thing he does where he will fight a couple of henchmen in a location and in killing them in the weirdest way he possibly could given the circumstances. Alarms will start going off like things will be really, really loud and then he will walk out of the room extremely slowly and normally as if he has just gone rid of all the suspicion of the state. There's a stage, exactly. Yeah. A lot of blaring and it's just like perfect.

Great work, 47. Now find an exit. It's also like this whole glass office, right? It looks so fucking dated. You can see all the handprints on the glass and stuff. And Bond spends so much of this movie in Hamburg, like basically the first half hour. And I mean, I'm gonna offend some listeners from Hamburg here, but like, frankly,

it doesn't look like a very interesting or exotic city to be. Oh, sorry. It's like, it just kind of looks like generic sort of like provincial large city. It's like, it's a bit like if in England you said it in Liverpool, you know? Like, it's fine. I'm sure people who are from there like it, but it doesn't, it's

not, you wouldn't go, wow, holy shit, fucking hamburger. Incredible. Wow. Yeah. And then we get to the scene that you two like, which I don't. Yes. Oh, we got the best scene of all time. Absolutely. Bond goes back to his hotel. Because on his way out, Elliot Carver calls him in the car and is like, you have things that belong to me. You have my like to decoding machine and you have. The wife. And my wife is in your hotel room.

Fucking bring me back. My wife. So Bond goes back to his hotel room and he finds a video tape playing in which sort of the newscaster announces the death of a wife. And I'm gonna do this every time I'm not gonna say her name, I'm not gonna do it. And he finds dead on the bed of a gunshot wound. At this point, he is fucking held up by the best guy in the world. A man walks into this scene, presumably after having gotten lost on his way to a Connery Bond film. Because he is such an old Bond character.

He looks a bit like Paul Barrow, the WWE character, he's got this sort of like really hangdog look. And so he points a gun at Bond and he goes, My name is Dr. Kaufman. I am an outstanding Marksman. Take my word for it, John. Three accents and as many sentences. Such a me doing a joke.

I'm not standing beside Mark's. As you can see, I am Dr. Stamper. Ridiculous. Incredible. So Kaufman's deal is that he's like a professional hitman. He travels around the world faking suicides for the most part, like overdose and stuff. And so he is killed Paris Carver.

And now he is here to kill the tone and pacing of his film. Yes, and also incidentally James Bond. Now, I mean, just fucking great, basically. He gets this one fucking life so bad. So Bond is like sitting across the room from him and he goes, if you shoot me from over there, it won't look like a suicide and Kausmann hits him with,

I am a professor of forensic medicine. Believe me, Mr Bond, I could shoot you from Stuttgart and still create the proper effect. And this line, ... ... and this line in Samovie, sent me off on an hour and a half of thinking about different qualifications this man could have and it would be funny.

He's got a doctorate in kylology and kylonomy. I am a master of education. I could shoot you from Stuttgart and still create the proper effect. I'm a bachelor in philosophy. Fuck this. I'm from the gender identity clinic What do you think about when you're masturbating? Make him uncomfortable I hate this guy

I hate this guy We're not done coming out with a hug We're not done thanks the film No, we're not done coming up with a Hello, I'm not a Kaufman. I have been hired to assassinate the pacing of this movie. I dropped out of Glasgow University Law School I could shoot you from dot guards I love this guy so I have I have a beat-tech national in hairdresser. I could shoot you on a stick top. I'm a practice bricklayer.

I could shoot. How are you doing? I watched over 50 play a U-video. I could shoot you on a stick top. How are you doing? I watched over 50 play a U-video. I guy. How I tell you, Mr. Bond. That they're trying. So while he's doing this, covers guys are trying to get into Bond's parked car because they think he's got the decoding thing in there.

Correct. Um, the first guy's a touch it gets on the like a shot from the door. Imagine he stole the decoder thing from the lab from the porn. Yeah, it is in the porn safe. So the first guy to touch it gets a election. Imagine he stole the decoder thing from the lab. From the porn. It is in the porn safe. So the first guy to touch it gets a shock from the door handle. The second guy to touch it gets a shock from the other door handle. And then they start hitting it with sledge hands and stuff.

And I want so badly to award the Chromestein Rosette to the guy who touches the electrified door handle for the third time and gets The husband is like, they get Kaufman on the radio as he is about to kill Bond and try to get him to open the thing. This is very embarrassing. It seems there is a red box in your car. They can't get to it. They want me to make you unlock the car. I feel like an idiot. I don't know what to say.

I'm too torturous if you don't do it. Just perfect. He's like at the whole time he's saying this, he's like to lounge it. He literally does say, do you have a girlfriend that though? It's like, imagine a guy of this magnitude arriving in like five no time to die. Like just a third of the way through the movie, Doctor Kaufman appears. How the fuck is...

How are you supposed to recover from this? How are you supposed to go on recording your podcast about this movie? I have a degree in economics from the university of Chicago. He's in the movies. I could shoot you. Two and a half minutes and in my heart forever. I didn't understand.

He steals the entire movie. Like, it's totally pointless. Like, you could honestly have caught this scene. You could have done it. I'm trying to discover in the body and then escaping. But anyway, he tricked out and electrocuted himself with discovering the body and then escaping. But anyway, he bond of the trick, he tricks Calvin to electrocute himself with a gadget phone and then shoot it.

But the thing that I love about Calvin so much is that because he is a consumer professional, as he is dying, he sets bond up for an easy line. Oh, it's so easy. He gets the gun pointed out him and he goes, wait, I am just a professional doing a job. And so Bond of course goes, so am I and shoots him. And it's like,

I'm going down extra mile. The actor playing Kaufman is playing this scene for comedy and Brosnan refuses to play this scene. So that's it. Like, go back and find this scene on YouTube if you can, this is because you will see like, you're acting, fighting over what this scene. So that's it. Like, go back and find this scene on YouTube if you can. This is because you will see it like you're actors fighting over what they're seeing is supposed to be and just like neither one of them giving it. It's.

Rosnund is 100% being a guy who has just found an old flame murdered in his bed. And Dr. Kaufman is a Dr. Kaufman. And there is such unbelievable intensity in the two actors, and state desperately trying to get their motivation across. It's, oh, it's perfect cinema. Just incredible. Anyway, there are still film sucks. Yeah, it's terrible.

Bond uses the remote control car to escape. Yeah, he is a remote control car to escape. It's like, again, it's a kind of a shit-looking car. It's a bit of a demo control car to escape. It's like, again, it's a kind of a shit looking car. It's a weird series of scenes. The only utility of this long-ass scene is that as a bunch of shots of James Bond looking at a phone for the first time, which I have been using to, for instance, do the Missy Elliott hollow when you get this Microsoft Excel text. Absolutely.

Now, Twitter account. So bond escapes and then hey kids, you know what's cool? The Royal Navy. The Royal Navy is cool. The Royal Navy is cool because Pierce Brosnan steps out of a helicopter onto a US airbase wearing a full fucking Royal Navy commander's uniform with the parachute wings and everything. Haircut is that of regulations for who cares.

It's a giant fucking recruiting ad. Great, fantastic. He meets with Wade once again. Yeah. Sheriff J.W. Pepper is back. He likes lightest legs still haven't come in. Nope. Nope. Yeah, he's not like baby legs right now. It's a problem. Pepper is back. He looks like his legs still haven't come in. No, no.

Yeah, he's not like baby legs right now. It's a problem. He shows the Americans the like to decoding machine. They're like, huh, well, that would mean the ship was 70 miles away from where they thought it was. And Bond immediately goes, right, I got a parachute into the direction. Chinese territorial waters. The other territory.

I want to talk for a second about how perfect a fucking prop the goddamn lector decoding machine is because it's just a red box. And you open it up and there's a digital display with random number output. It's perfect. Perfect. It's always doing the computer's noise every time it gets looked at. Find the computer in the space. It's always doing the computer's noise every time it gets looked at fantastic find the computer in dispensate so So I find the computer in dispensate so so so bond does Halo jump right a high altitude low opening parachute jump into the water in order to do this

But he's being briefed on how dangerous it is right and do this, but he's being briefed on how dangerous it is, right? And there's weight is with him inexplicably, and he does this line, right? Who the fuck was Wade's first wife, Zenia on the top? What the fuck was this? What the fuck was this? Breath play shit, What are you doing? That would be an incredible twist, Ashie, if Sonia was way it's X. And she was like really brokenhearted

because he left her. That would be such a good. You've had any thought for five miles and then use your oxygen or your diavisphyxiation. That's much like my wife. Much like my wife. Like, what? And this is being metaphorical. I felt that I was being as fixated emotionally by my marriage. Yeah, it seems like you should talk to somebody about that.

Anyway, I've got to jump out of a plane and go and scuba dive. It's a good thing that we're off by even like a hundred meters, because swimming with all the scuba gear on is exhausting. We also get the perfect shot, which is after bond parachutes, we had a shot of bond popping back up out of the water. And this is going to be the episode art. So don't even worry. The problem with the episode art, right, is that it's square, right?

And this is a wide shot and the only thing in it is his breath. And like, whoop out of the water. And it's incredible. Anyway, yeah, this was the moment I paused the movie and it was like, God, they should have sent a poet. Every frame of fight. So Bond dives into the wreck of the Devon's year where he encounters a bunch of corpses,

a missing cruise missile, and then way lin in scuba gear. And at this point, I paused and I wrote down verbatim. You know, this is a lot likely other time I explored a sunken British warship with an attractive woman when I was the same guy. You know, this is a lot like the last time there was an underwater theft of a British nuclear weapon when I was the same guy.

You know, this is a lot like. A lot like. A lot like. That was not too bad. So the second time I did that under what I think I had a pipe with a robot underwater, that was good. Yeah. If I had a dollar for every time I had, you know, dived into a sunken British warship in the shoes of a stolen nuclear weapon, I would have five dollars, which isn't a lot,

but it's weird that it's happened that many times. At least there's never a remote control shark this time. That's true. would have five dollars, which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it's happened that many times. At least there's never a remote control shark this time. That's true. There is some peril, but the peril is very stupid. It's like the wreck is about to fall over or something. Yeah, sure. They get out and then they immediately get captured by her stampa.

Her stampa. Who? Yeah. Ever is down. Hey, this is a lot like that other time that I'd stole something and then I surfaced and the bad guy had simply taken over my boat and waited for me That would have been Christa trusted it Also another guy who looked like stamp was on that fucking

Creel or something My god, you're right. It's just quickly again. It's a great way like it's again. It's red grant number five It's so. Jesus Christ. Hey, it's the same movie. Are we in provetories? We're going to get to no time to die, and then we're just going to start again.

It's just going to be Dr. Nell. Every time we reach for James Bond, he receipts from us. Oh my God. We're just going to start finding like more and more prognon Bond movies we like never get to the end. Why do I have to roll this bond off a hill? Why does it always roll down and crush me? Yeah, that would be really funny though,

if we got to the end and they just started again. I think it's a big deal. I think it's a big deal. Also known as, we just do it again. But, but, but, we don't watch the movie, we just go off on this. Yes, that's the funniest possible bit. It's to do all of these again, but without seeing any of them.

And if we just kind of until it's a photocopy of a photocopy of a photocopy. We just, kill James Bond is an art piece. We're doing a homicidal talent set. It's really funny. You don't understand. So we're going to say gone. We got a say gone on the helicopter. Bond is not going to go to go to death say gone because they don't really go to say gone.

The Vietnamese government, if they could film in say gone and we're told fuck off. So I did a little in Thailand. And you can even see multiple Thai flags throughout this. Nice. But Bond is here complaining about being handcuffed in Michelle Yo, which could not be me. And then he makes this weird joke, right? They fly towards this giant skyscraper,

which is a giant banner of Elliot Carver's face. And it's a little hard to make this out, but what he says is, Another Carver building. If I didn't know, Vanrox, he developed an edifice complex. I'd say he develops an edifice complex. It's actually quite like that. The thing about that right is that it has two qualities as a line. The first is that it's not funny, and the second is that it doesn't make sense.

And that's true of all of Bond's jokes in this movie. Yeah, he needs a bit of material. I'd say he had an edifice complex because he fucked the building and then killed his father and then tore out his own eyes like edifice, the classical tragedy. Really big, great guy met his stone. What, what are you talking about, man? Yeah, he's not working at his best here. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,land to cover. Wayland sees a general, a Chinese general, general Chang on the way out.

And is like, oh shit, he's working with Carver. That explains a lot. And so Carver is like drafting Bond obituary to which simply use the previous one from when he was killed in Hong Kong and he was the same guy Yeah, I already read that far Yeah, no, I'm gonna second really not that far not at all There's a funny moment here where where way then tries to bluff him and say our governments know what you in general Chang are up to They try and like bluff cover and he just goes no you don't

Just like you just saw general Chang in the hallway, man. You just saw him in the halls and you, nah, you're from a shit fucking- Well, we also hit like the most, the most tired storybeat in the, the one they've been doing since Doctor No, which is bond is a man out of time, right? And so Carver tries to be like, oh, you guys, you're fucking over, man. It's, it's all words now and computers and like, oh, you guys, you're fucking over, man. It's all words now in computers and like computers, satellites of a new artillery, a comparison which again, does not make any fucking sense.

It doesn't, but that was the pitch that was put forward that was until his movie being made. Yeah, it's words of a new weapon, satellites of a new artillery. Yeah, I'm the new Napoleon. It sucks. So we're gonna put Dr. Kaufman in here, fuck you. Yeah, yes. And so speaking of Dr. Kaufman,

he hands them over to her stumper, right? And her stumper is going to do sharkra torture. Yes, he's a sharkra torture. He helps, like, a cover helpful explains that the sharkra's in Eastern medicine are energy centers like the heart or genitals. And he's going to like torture those with a series of like scary looking tools. So what are essentially being told is that like how Stamper is going to... Cock and ball torture from Wikipedia.

Don't come from free encyclopedia at en.wikipedia.org. Yeah, um, and so, but like there is there is one great line which is a fucking Stamper just has to throw away line that he learned it from Kaufman and then he looks straight at Bond and he's like, he was like a father to me. Yeah, that is exactly what I was also going to bring up. It's so funny, but they're like, oh no, no, you think Kaufman's gone, baby? Welcome to the primary character motivation for Stump, from here on, which is that? Alphman and Stamper just like his dad. He's just like, he's dead. He's just like, the Kaufman scene is so out of step

with the rest of the film that is genuinely weird to hear another character acknowledge that Kaufman existed. It's very stressful. I'm sorry, I'm too. I'm sorry, I'm too. Wait, he was real? No. Like, hallucinated that guy, I was going through some things.

And then still have a lot of vodka than I before. I don't know, what the fuck was that? So, like, he was like a phaser to me. Is the funniest possible way to like claim revenge on someone's butt? It's jet right. You also get a wonderful line, which is one of the most, like the single most stereotypical

of an online possible where Bond calls Carver Insane and he says some shit like, you know, genius and zaddy really on that fire part. And I just want to say, if anyone ever calls you insane and your response is, well, you know, a lot of people are called insane during their time, you're insane. You've got nothing. You need to go for a different eye.

It's not that. Also, it's not a good answer because Carver's not insane. He's just making them an eyeacle. Like, it's not a good answer because Carver's not insane. He's just making them an eye-cow. It's not the same thing. So Bond escapes by literally kicking over a table. He and Boilin' a handcuff together. They tear down the giant banner down the outside of the building and ride down it.

Safety. Get on a motorbike and have a chase. Oh, and again, the product placement, getting really gorgeous in this movie, because you know who makes motorbikes? It's the right, no, it's BMW. And so they get on this, like, it's actually quite a nice looking bike, it's like a BMW like cream colored motorcycle, but they have to like get in a very long car chase.

It's a very badly edited chase as well. There's a lot of discolored extra tips, which suggests to me that they just didn't get the coverage. There's a lot of things to discuss about this. First of all, I do like that they tried to do something inventive of an action scene where Bond is handcuffed to another agent. It's great, and it's done a lot better in the movie they stole it from, which is Project A2 with Jackie Chan. But, and like, it's shot really, really badly. You can, they didn't even bother trying to cover up all the tight street signs.

At least they didn't do any like sort of comical like side shows. Like, if this was a more Bond movie, you'd like drive through and there would be like a reaction shot of something close on quote, Vietnamese happening, right? Like absolutely. At least they spare you that. There's also quite amusingly in order to make this work for the actors. work for the actors. Whalen has a fake arm on and in certain shots, it is so long. It's so long.

Just such. If you pause it, it's really good. Yeah, but they're kind of like bickering with each other on the bike. They helicopter that they trick it into driving into wall exploded. It's very obviously full of dummies. Like, yeah, it's not a very good choice.

They, they, yeah, but they escape. That's quite such a shit. Paulie Dunstance. Yeah. Yeah, they've been so shit-in-tower-roo-roo-roo-roo-roo. Bond then gets in a shower with Whalen in the streets. Yeah, and he washes her hair. He doesn't bite her shoulder, though.

No, he doesn't, because he makes a series of handcuffs puns. She unlocks herself with handcuffs and handcuffs him to the water pipe, which is the correct reaction to ever encountering James Bond in any circumstances is that this is a dangerous man who needs to be physically restrained from you. But Bond just breaks out of that easily. So, yeah. It's bad. So he follows, he follows, so, to sort of like, remember how, yeah, you remember how in the more movies Q would have like a base abroad, like Q bracket Indian or whatever. Q himself is not necessarily and is not like

involved here, but I can only really describe this setup as Q brackets Chinese. Yeah, it's really about like she goes back to her base to find that it has been sort of infiltrated by a bunch of guys and she has a fight with them and change guys. Bond is like following her and beating up other agents, but it's not communicated clearly at all. So it does just sort of look like Bond is walking through Saigon, eating the shit out of random guys, because he gets the drop on every single one of them. It's really funny. He's not a status that I can't tell you. He walks up to Saigon, he's just like, he beats up one guy who's like trying to light his

cigarette and bond mimes like he's looking for a lighter. Mimes that he has the lighter and then opens his hands and punches the guy. And it's very close to fucking Dr. Hibbot punching the guy through an empty mirror. Yeah. It's genuinely very weird. So just as I was congratulating this film for having an Asian character who doesn't know Kung Fu in it, way then of course as a Kung Fu. She knows Kung Fu. She knows Kung Fu.

Yeah, of course. Because that's what you're here for, is Michelle Yoh doing Kung Fu. No, at this point. So at this point, obviously, they sort of like, we'll get there. Agree to work together, right? And he sort of inspect the various gadgets that they have including an updated version of his watch, which he doesn't tell him how to use I like a food dog like a lion dog that shoots fire The new worth of P99 because arms manufacturers are also getting probably placement in this movie.

Fun, fun, fun. Throughout this scene, while they're having a discussion, occasionally more guys will drop in to have a little bit of a fight with them, and they'll just dispatch them easily. One of them gets up and they throw a fucking balloon at him, and he just never gets up and they like throw a fucking balloon at him and he just like never gets up again. And it's like, did that kill him?

So, so that brings me to like, it's for the know, both Beijing and London. And, but Bond goes, okay, you get the gear, I'll send the messages. And there's a site gag where he like goes to the computer that has come out of the floor and it has Chinese keyboard, which he can't read. Now again, this is the same guy who... Instant Japanese, you may need it. You forget I took a first and Oriental language is a Cambridge.

Same guy, that's the same man. That's the same man. That's the same man. Cambridge. You're too much for a good guy. I could shoot you from Shenzhou or the effects would still be correct. Yes. Yes. In past Dr. Kauffman.

If it was like a father's, I was like, there's a really badly edited scene transition at the end of the scene where they cut to the next one. They're quite clearly cutting over past Bros. and line like the editing and the films are a bit sloppy. Yeah, they work out where the stealth ship is, which is in high-long bay. And I've written down, this reminds me a lot of the time that I came here to kill Scaramanga 30 years ago. Yeah, when I was the same guy.

When I was the same guy. Like it's in the background. Yeah, which is something called a soft-skinned man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I want that killed a guy at the start now. So, you know, it was a weird time When I was when I was the same man I tweeted this on the account one time but I've been just set with nightmares thinking about fuck boys Scaramanga with three nipple things Fucking excuse me

Just what a perfect I can't stop. Fucking excuse me. Just what a perfect. Okay. For minutes. Good luck in ganky. They also they also there's an offline here where she says, yeah, we found someone who will take us there, but they say it's a bad luck. So he's not going to do it after dark. And I just wrote that's quarrel again.

Exactly what quarrel. Yes. That's it. Quarrel. Quarrel bracket quarrel brackets Chinese, yes. She calls him a decadent agent of a corrupt Western power, which gets you. And then his comeback is. They say communist don't know how to have fun.

Which is a weird line on its own, but also I will be using it to react to a lot of things later on. This podcast is proof that that is not true. We had a lot of fun with Dr. Kaufman, for instance. Yes. But to him, I'm very sad. I'm very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad.

We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad.

We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad. We're very sad. We're's where they live. That's how they're playing the game. And his plan is he's going to use the cruise missile that he stole from the Devonshire. He's going to fire it at the Chinese from the stealth boat as it's hidden in the middle of the British fleet. So it's going to look like the British have attacked Star Wars and then I'm going to get question mark. Question mark, question mark, question mark. It's not even question mark.

His plan is much more involved than that. His plan is General Chang, his guy, is gonna call a meeting of the Politburo in Beijing. That meeting is gonna get obliterated by the crew's missile. General Chang's not gonna show up. He is gonna show up in time to take power in Beijing. Call a truce between the two, again, nuclear hours that have just entered into a state of armed conflict, win a Nobel

Peace Prize, and also sign over all of the broadcast rights in China to cover. What a surprise to happen if he doesn't stop the war from happening? Not sure. I guess the plot of threads comes directly out of it. I don't know. Yeah, Carver's plan seems to rely a lot on British people being normal, which is not imagining the war against China. There's not. There's going to be a short war.

It's totally portrayed as like in a war, maybe. It's totally portrayed as like in a war, maybe. It's totally portrayed as like in a war, maybe. It's totally portrayed as like in a war, maybe. It's totally portrayed as like in a war, maybe. It's totally portrayed as like in a war, maybe proposition between the two. I'm like, yet, no, I don't think so. Yes, anyway, Argentina, but bond, well, we kind of, what bond did, I sorry, we don't really know. We didn't beat. What we were going to work against Argentina, we just wanted to, I'm. I was saying we're for oil idol bottom. No, when you're in the worst manner I've ever seen he yeah he stabs a guy holds that guy out of sight shoots at stampa waits for stampa to shoot back and then dumps that guy's body

in the water, which prompts stample to not investigate further, and then this exchange happens. But it's there. Delicious. I'm sorry. There you go. But price gets in quite a funny joke. Bond's expense where he says to weigh, he says to weigh then, Bond's on his way to the bottom of the sea. He's my new anchor man, which I thought was quite funny.

That was going to highlight that. And then he gets his second joke in on way lit. Well, because this joke is so fucking bad that it causes her to try and attack him using her kung fu skills. And Jonathan Price, then I don't know what this was written as in the script, makes a series of kung-fu gestures and these noises. If you wanted to hear that, the game for instance. And then he just goes pathetic. Yes. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, There's the reference again. It's such a weird fucking excuse. It was, if the impression they didn't tell Michelle

Yo about it, because she doesn't respond of anger. She just looks confused. What? I mean, I don't know whether that was an, it can't have been an ad lib because we see it from like two angles. They would have had to turn around. Like that would have taken half an hour's

with a filming to shoot, like at least. I, I, I, I don't know. I didn't have to do that. Yeah. You wouldn't have how many times how many times I had to talk about it doing that never seen. Yeah, so please, but Bond goes to the party in Hamburg. Please, you've met my wife. I mean, I already don't like the character.

You don't need to also make him racist. He's also racist. He's also racist. It's always the hat on a hat with the Brosnan movies, right? In the same way, Alex Travellian, it's like, oh, he's not just betraying Britain. He's also a rapist. It's so also with this guy. I just wrote racism at the 11th hour.

Like, it's weird that it's here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He does the entire man from Hong Kong bit. Yeah, yeah, he does the entire man from Hong Kong bit like, uh, oh god, I'm done. I just do man from Hong Kong. I don't say. There's a bunch of man from Hong Kong. racist noises he's having from. He's a joy. I mean, genuinely, it's essentially like, uh, my business takes me to these.

Yes. Chinese make the best service. I understand your culture and your language inspector. And your martial arts. Especially those. Hey! Oh, George ladies and me. I got a funny one by the movies.

James Bond takes Gupta hostage and says, I'll trade Gupta for way then. Carver's like, fuck it, I'll give a shit about Gupta, the plan's already emotional, I have to do is hit the button, so he shoots Gupta and bonds like, oh, I had a backup plan, which was a grenade in a jam jar, boom. Yes, I activated with a watch, no one told him how to use.

Yes. So, but Bond and Waylon, right, regroup no one told him how to use. Uh, yes. So, but Bond and Whalen, right, regroup, fight their way through the ship. Uh, to try and stop the missile. Whalen has an ninja star hidden in her boot because of course she does. I, I simply wrote down here, O to be an extra being beaten up by Michelle, you know, anyway. Um, so yeah, God, okay. Uh, well Bond kills Carver, but that kind of sells it a bit short bond offers a succession of

Filling line it right's cover to a particle level. It's it's something else. Yeah, he turns the fucking seedrill on him and the seed real the fucking seedrill on him. And the seedrill? The seedrill. And at the same time, he goes, you forgot the first lesson of mass media, Elliott, give the people what they want. Which doesn't have any bearing on the situation

that he's currently. It's like, yeah, you've got an edifice complex. And that's like the line of the movie that they kill him. I don't get it. Yeah, he literally says, I've got some breaking news for you. And then he kills him. Great enough. Yeah, but they have freaking news and kick him into it. So, so, so it's a cut with this, the jam jar grenade has blown enough of a hole in the stealth boat thing that now Having been warned the Royal Navy the hero of this movie

Can track this stealth boat and start attempting to destroy it and start shooting at it and stuff Wayland gets captured again for the second time in about She loves getting captured which same but like she loves it She gets fucking shamed up by Stamper as Bond is trying to diffuse the cruise missile. And we get another fucking baffling line from Bond. Did you get this, Alice? I don't, I don't have the drop, but yeah, she throws... No, no, no, no, Samba has, has wailin chained up and says, you know, come and fight me, Mr Bond, I will avenge Carver and other aspect. And, and Bond says, never argue with a woman. They're always right. I'm like, what? What? He's just saying shit now. He's just like, I draw a clock.

What? Draw a clock. About draw a clock. So, it's like this fucking movie was written by an AI. It's like a f**k. So, it's like this f**k in movie was written by an AI. It's a man. This is like one of those I made an AI. It really is. It really is. And then just go. It really is.

Forgot the first rule of mass media, Carter. It really is. Like, we gave all the previous Bond films to a neural net and had it write this, which is just like a mashup of other things. We then get in captured like two or three times getting stuck Weird racism lines that don't make any fucking sense It's just a fight Yeah, it is temper and bond have a fight bond bond bond pins his leg with the fucking

Missile and yeah is like well, I'm going to die. And then just like holds bon to the choke on like, and you know what, you're coming with me, pal. Yeah. Going to me, Dr. Kaufman took us in heaven, but he will torture you. Yeah. Kaufman bond cuts away his the vest that the shampoor is holding him by. Goes and dives out of way,land rescues her. The missile is destroyed. Stamper is killed.

The Royal Navy sink the stealth ship. The bomb blows up, but the chain is still attached to something taught. Whatever. Fucking who cares. Yeah. For my sucks. They kind of fuck a bit. And lies to the press.

No, it's more than that. No, that's more than that. No, that's more than that. No, no. Because the last line in this is, is M, we're not the last line. The last line is bond going like, we should have sex and more. But like back in London. Yeah.

And the last line of any of these rough movies. Yeah, drafts up an obituary for Carver, which is MI6's job, I guess. And it's a sentence that he is on his luxury yacht and he dies of apparent suicide. And that's a Robert Maxwell joke. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane.

That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane.

That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That is a joke about the day of the Laney Galane. That's, that's, that's, I'm so glad you picked up on that as well, because I thought I was going insane. I went completely over my head. I'm too, too young to remember that, but. Robots not age, I'm just insane with the fucking. It's genuinely like, that's,

that's, like putting that in a fucking fictional MI6 thing feels like being taunted by the real killer. Like Mr. Police gave you all the clues. We literally said in a movie. Oh yeah, he just killed this guy. We've been really, really, really, really funny if Anne was just like, it seems that he was hit by a crashed because of a white fiat Uno. The white, the white one.

The white one. He's a never-hat there. I feel just like, yeah, seems seems to hit by a struck by. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal.

Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal.

Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. Shmooth criminal. set during the July 1997 transfer of Hong Kong from British to Chinese rule. Oh great. The cover was supposed to be like this zealot, bent on destroying Hong Kong instead of handing it over. And this idea was scrapped due to friend of a show Henry Kissinger, who said, look, this will have happened by the time the movie comes out.

And if something does happen during the handover, this is going to look horrid. Henry Kissinger there, taking the role of what member of the podcast who remembers the release schedule. What point did Henry Kissinger see the script for James Bond film? How did that happen? Oh, he gets approval on all of them. He was genuine.

He was Secretary of State at the time in the Clinton administration. He was acting as a consultant on the production them. Yeah. He was genuine. He was Secretary of State at the time in the Clinton administration. He was acting as a consultant on the production of state since the Clinton administration. What? What? You're from Stuttgart. Yeah. No, why? It's the American government acting as a consultant for James Bond film. I feel like you could take exactly four seconds and figure out why. It's not great. We accidentally discovered the deep space and trying to talk about the fond-moving, the British Navy and all of these. Yes. Anyway, you should join the Royal Navy. We'll three of us have red dots on us now, so let's not talk about

that anymore. No, the guy who's just come. Um, we have a science based system on this podcast. Uh, yes, it's called the scum specter. Yes, we do. It sounds like a small cultural sensitivity. Unprovoked violence and misogyny. What do we think for SMAM? I think this one is pretty time high. It's so high. This is what makes dad jokes with Q. Yeah, that's high. That's high. I

could be I could see seven yes, okay, it's unbearable and it's like the fact that it's like Smamy, but also unintelligible has to be like a force multiple I think it is an edifice complex would be a smarmy line if it made sense. The fact that it makes no fucking sense makes it even smarmy. It must be said as well that like I don't think Brosnan has quite hit his stride for like where the smar comes from emotionally. I thought Connery did that really well and Mord did it really well and I tell you who does it my favorite is Daniel Craig who will get to

Never heard them But yeah, Brosnan. I don't think he's quite found whether smart comes from yet. Oh, what do you feel about cultural Insensitivity now I don't drop here. I'm gonna Again, it's on the part of Bond Okay, we're about to... My way! Hold up! Hold up! Hold up! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Again, it's on the part of Bond. Um, is the existence of... Yes. The existence of chakra torture?

Okay, fine. On Bond's part, I don't know. He does kill that German guy. I don't know. Yeah, he's a hard man. He's a racist against Germans. I don't fucking know what to do. He actually doesn't have that many...

Especially as someone who spends half the movie in like the east he doesn't. I guess I guess I guess the part of the point of the like kung fu noises thing is to like make us like Elliot Carver less because we're not supposed to like racism anymore. But at the same time the either thing it's on the part of Bond I think it's on the part of the film and there is some stuff like, you know, the Chinese character like knows Kung Fu and I have a ninja star and has all these like Chinese like dragon gadgets and shit. There is some shit in here that just seems a little bit like almost lazy. Yeah, three. Yeah, that seems absurdly low for a movie that again contains the sequence of noises.

low for a movie that again contains the sequence of noises. But, I, yeah, that's my vote. It's three. A bit of a lot worse. Three, yeah. Oh, it could have been. Unprovoked so much. That's so much worse. Well, I mean, I love this one.

I love this one. Yeah, is that as opposed to Golden Eye, which was adapted into a movie from a first-person shooter game, this one wasn't so that isn't as many long segments of just shooting everyone who appears on the screen. It's it's it's actually not that it's it's genuinely a lot less than average for a prozner movie and we'll get back to the heights of I don't think he actually attacks anyone unprovoked. The worst he does is knocks a guy unconscious with an asterisk and that guy is calling for help. Yeah, I have one even. Yeah, okay, okay.

And finally, misogyny. They tried to do something. And a bit that we kind of skipped over is that when they're fucking, Harris gets him to at least admit that he kind of likes women disposable and that like the reason why he left is because she got too close for comfort, which is good, I guess. Yeah, it's nice to have a bit of sincerity. They don't really like, they don't really like flirt. There's no sort of sexual illusions with waylin until the very end, which makes it weirder that they still have to end on

an implied sex scene. Yeah, that is strange actually. That she like finally, he like makes jokes like washing her hair and stuff and she's not really interested. Yeah. I think not really interested in an understanding that she handcuffs him to a pipe. As is correct. You should be doing it. I think I want to give it a couple of points for the fact that Wayland's always captured in the end on her sex scene. Yeah.

She's a Colonel, by the way. She outranks Bond and she's just getting bonked in just yet. Yeah. So two or three. Yeah, I'm having a three sure. This is gonna be white This is gonna be too low is my concern. Well how bad a movie it is. Yeah, well, it's not it's not a rating about good The film is because golden I scored about average, but was a better film than this which is sitting on 14 which is Sturt the lower end of middling

Um, still the best is you to a kill on 007, for your eyes only and imagine secret service on 8. This is the lowest we've had since for a while, but yeah, it's still about average. It's going to be the lowest we have for a while because next up, is the world is not enough. I like that one. Interesting.

I remember liking it when I was a kid. No, I've never seen it. We're hitting the big all Scots or Russians button again. A couple of things. First of all, the stuff ship is based on a real prototype that Lockheed Martin made in the 80s called the C-Nodeau. If you Google that, it looks like shit. The second thing is

Gotz Auto, the guy who played Shampa. He is casting, he was only given 20 seconds to introduce himself. And the sentence that he said is he went, I'm big, I'm bad, I'm bold, I'm German. Five seconds keep the change. I like that a lot. Legend.

Dude's rock. And we also have some awards that we should probably give out. Oh, the... The Frank Tuch. The Fronstein Rosette. The guy who touches the car for the third time. Yes, that guy. That guy.

Thank you, Andy. I was thinking to the pilot though. The pilot tries to kill the guy flying the jet that he's in. Oh, that's going above and almost want to be able to. It's quite impressive. Can we do a joint award of those two? Why not? The guy who touches the mantle over the time and a backseat driving pilot.

And the good night cross for a sort of morally good character who is underappreciated. I'll even morally gray. I'll take at this point. Yeah, yeah. I just wanna give a start to Kaufman, don't you? I do wanna give a start to Kaufman. I have no interest in giving it to Dr. Kauf. He's not underappreciated, evidently. Not by us.

What about the guy who is on the radio in the opening of the first scene? MI6 is first and only black employee who does come back. I think he even has a name in the next one. Yeah, Charles Robinson, by Colin Salmon. Charles Robinson, I'd like him. He's fun. Yeah, okay. Sure, good night, Gross. Why not? There you go.

I would also have accepted guy who tells Bond how not to die during the Halo jump. No, fuck that guy. No, I fucking know he should have he should have liked to. Yeah, what are you going to want to do is you want going to want to put your head as close to the oxygen tank as possible. You're going to want to hold your breath as you come up to the surface. That's right. That's a movie. That's a movie that we watch. That's a podcast.

Just about that's a movie. That's a podcast. The next podcast and the next movie. The world is not enough. You get some more fucking like weird bon-shit about Russians again. Got some good ideology because the bad guys and anarchist baby. We should get anarchist. Oh, it is. Yeah, we should get an anarchist on. Yeah, perfect. This has been kill James Bond. Thank you for listening. I have been Alice Gordeloy. I have been joined by Abigail Thorne and Devon.

My wife. I do. And my wife. Thank you for listening to yet another episode of Kill, James Bond. Tune in in exactly two weeks time for the world is not enough with special guest, Thought Slime. We got mildered baby, but if two weeks is simply too long for you to wait, why don't you head on over to our Patreon, which is patreon.com slash Kill James Bond, all one word. And next week you can listen to our Halloween

spooktacular, which will be coming out about three days after Halloween. I don't be said we're not timely. And we are going to be talking about van Helsing, starring Hugh Jackman, and it's a rip-roaring fun time. I genuinely, usually recommend listening to that one. But speaking of course of our patrons, we would be nothing without the support of our £15 and above patrons. And those are Forks Winchester, Jack Holmes,

Paint McCala, George Rojhack, Thomas Oberhart, Saul, Paris Carver brackets, I know a learned to read a bit, Fratek, Nikki Caroline Tangasley, Amber DeGratz, Cia Beno, Rice Max Gamer Hart, Amanda Rector, Kid Divine, Sydney Steckel, Holiday, J J. Martin Del Mothman, Jack Busshel, and Turkey Friedkommi Field Commissar Gen Gen, Big Titty Goth Girl, Tript, Timothy Pajoni, Top O. Larricans, Hell Bloodhands, very appropriate for next week's bonus, Varatsukat, Elizabeth Cogz, Zoe Sheppard, Alfredo Jonas Schwamberger, Avery Darling, Richard Drumray, or Neil David with Ramarhatna, James Nattman, Robbie Morgan, Josh Simmons, Giniw92, Millie and Owl, Boeing, standing at quite unwieldy to say

them all, but the Kill James of Ones promises I will never stop reading every single one of these, no matter how many patrons we get, because I love the people. This has been Kill James of Ones, one I've been Devon, Alice Navigale, who have been Alice and Abigail respectively. Our producer is Nate Vasey, the podcast artist by Mati Luchanski, and our website is by the wonderful Tom Allen. See ya. you