Upstream - Episode 25: Quantum of Solace

Episode Date: January 19, 2022

Well, it's finally happened. we've talked about a movie for longer than the runtime of the movie. We also bid goodbye to a beloved classic character, Mitchell from the movie Quantum of Solace. It's always so hard to lose them like this... I'd only just recovered from the untimely demise of 'the character Sharkey from the movie License to Kill', and now I have to deal with a whole other wave of pain.  Also we invent the alternate universe Even Older Moore Bond film Moonpussy, so there's that. Find bonus episodes at our reasonably-priced patreon! https://www.patreon.com/killjamesbond *WEB DESIGN ALERT* Tom Allen is a friend of the show (and the designer behind our website). If you need web design help, reach out to him here:  https://www.tomallen.media/ Find us at https://killjamesbond.com and https://twitter.com/killjamesbond

You know who green is and you want to put us in bed with him. You are kidding right? Yeah, you're right. We should just deal with nice people Hello and welcome to another episode of kill James Bond. I am Alice Cauterall Carly. Cow fuck, I'll do that one again. I'm Alice Cauterall Carly. I'll go that for fuck of that. Alright, come back. Inclaircy, don't lose, Evan is dead. No, this is better than killing. Yeah, the cows are dry. I don't know, man.

Hello and welcome to another episode of Kill James Bond. I am Alice Cauterall Carly. Joining me are Devon and Abigail Thorne. I definitely didn't just fuck up the intro to this and like trip over my own name. I had a bit of blood removed today, hey. Yeah, and so introduce myself as Alice Caudwell-Kia-Kia-Kia it specifically from the tongue. That's what it extracted. Absolutely. But we are gathered here today to inaugurate the second Craig Fingersuck James Bond movie. I'm going to keep calling him this. I'm going to keep doing it. It's Quantum of Solace. And I mean, in this case, what I kind of had in mind for this episode, was we do like a chill vibes thing, and we just have a nice time.

Oh, calm. Exactly. Exactly. We have some like low-fi chill hop beats that you can bond to in the background. I'm putting on my coloured lights lights. I can really do it. It's relaxing. We're hit. The last bonus, little high tempo. We're just going to. Absolutely. Absolutely. And the thing is, I'm missing a lot of blood, therefore, we're going to go sort of into a sort of a cooler zone, but also missing a lot of blood is Mr. White, the guy who at the end of Casino Royale, James Bond shot in the leg and then did the like banner thing too.

Because it's a direct sequel. It's a direct sequel. It's like minutes later. The only Bond one. Yeah, after. Absolutely. Absolutely. And so it picks up quantum of Solace in sort of in media's race as Bond drives the Aston Martin around I guess like Lake Como wherever the fuck it's supposed to be. Andrew Cuomo. Yeah, around Lake Andrew Cuomo. And with his brother like Chris Cuomo. And then some guys driving one of the classic evil cars, a black Alfa Romeo 159. Just a fantastic car, looks, pointy. It's one of the spy cars.

You can have a black sit-through in DS. You can have one of the black Mercedes, sort of like 50s Mercedes, or you can have this. It's a damn shame, because gone are the days of the classic henchman car, but there's like 10 guys in there that are finally now hanging out of the windows. Yes, yes.

The days are having like an air suspension, all black sit-for-and-d-s with the yellow headlights on it for some reason. Just like sliding perfectly around a dirt road while four guys in jumpsuits lean out of each window. It hits a coin in the road and perfectly explodes. I just missed that shit so much. This is the car for the modern henchmen. This is the car that is on the cover of henchmen magazine. Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely. So there are guys with guns in there,

henchmen in fact, they are aware that Bond has just shot Mr. White and therefore they are chasing him and shooting at him. And I wrote down here, what if we did a car chase, but it was good for the first time in the franchise? I mean, good is relative. Well, we're gonna talk about the cinematography of this movie because yeah I'm gonna have to have to activate Devon mode. Yeah, I also consider that yeah like like a like a tree that has like

Dutch Elm disease the franchise has developed a case of of whole greengrass blight Yeah I'm protected sex with Jason Bourne of whole greengrass blight. Yeah, it had unprotected sex. I'm protected sex with Jason Bourne. Yeah, so, okay. We need to talk about editing. I really, really want to like this film, but unfortunately the editing

and all the action sequences is not bad because we are from the era where they've invented editing. But there's a lot of cuts and we're cutting from very close up on Daniel Craze's eyes to his hand on the gear and up to a shot of the mirror, and there's so much, it's all over the place, there's like crash-to-umes, and everything's happening, it's really loud. And I understand why they did this, because it's supposed to be like, James Bond doesn't get a wide

shot showing all the people chasing him. He just gets little snatchers here and there. The idea is that it puts you in the scene. Yeah, it's interiority of his like desperation and whatever. But like, unfortunately, I can't see what the fuck is happening in this film. Yeah, that's my heart, because I really like it, but I can't tell what's going on. What happened was there was this philosophical thing, right? There's this philosophical change that happened in the making of films. What they decided that the way to shoot something to suggest speed was to do three cuts a second. So you do like cut, cut, cut.

Whereas before that, the way you suggested speed was by filming something that was fast. It just makes me think of Liam Neeson going over a fence. Like it's all that I think of it. There's genuinely a shot in this, but it's three frames of him shifting gear. Just like, did, did, did, did. And then it cuts again. I'm like, fuck, I'd stop it. There's genuinely a shot in this, but it's three frames of him shifting gear. It's just like, and then it cuts again. I'm like, fuck, I'd stop it, please. Yeah, it's sad because it's really good. The music is so good in this film, the way they weave the bond theme in and out of the original music, but it's a real shame it brings down the whole film. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It. It works. It. It works. It works. It works. It. It works. It works. It works. It. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works. It works best in this

scene. I've found because I think because they want to ease you into it. The cuts aren't quite as bad here. Right. It gets worse as it goes on. But so bond is like chased through a quarry. They shoot at him, the cops chase them, and then the guys, the henchmen shoot the cops, and then Bond escapes into the historic center of Sienna in Italy, where he just sort of drives into a convenient tunnel, which leads to an MI6 safe house.

He opens the boot, Mr. White's in there, and he's like, right, get out. And that's the opening thing. You get the theme song after this. The theme song. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no banger. No, no, I don't agree. I mean, listen. I aged 12. I don't think it has. I think that much like the thing in the scene that follows and also in Casino Real where it has parkour, I feel like the white stripe or in this case, Jack White only and Alicia Keys, is like a feature of when this movie was made so much that it dates it.

And so we're gonna run into that a lot in the cragious specifically because there are like every movie has its own little thing that was just big at the time it was made and now horrendously dates it. Like I'm gonna go completely to have a mode. And scuba diving. I'm gonna go completely to have a mode over the fucking like yellow filter inspector. Yes. And like maybe the earlier Bond movies have this too and we're just like too young to know it.

Yeah, because we were alive when this stuff was what so yeah, I genuinely do feel as if the Craig movies might be a bit more fadish in that way. They might be a little bit more sort of like trend-driven. The titles are cool though. They're kind of a little bit of a throwback to the original Brosnan ones because they're like, yo, you heard it, Titties. You heard of Titties, but what if they were made of sand? Yeah, the entire symbolism present in these titles is like, yo, what if there was a desert? But it was like, but it's sexy lady.

You were back to horny title women, which is, notably the casino royale titles were the best ones because they were not horny, but were in fact just an anime opening. Whereas these were back to, were back to like, oh, have you seen the shape that a woman's back is? What if the villain from Sky Mountain 3 had like incredible rack though?

Absolutely. I would have sad man just had like huge honk. What if Sandman just had like huge hunk? Huge, but like, yeah. I mean, we have to stop the podcast for a few minutes. Yeah, in order to like, yeah, absolutely. Here's Bruceman in a calpher at bikini, but also he's made of sands. Oh man, imagine if you did he fucked sand titties. That'd be really, oh.

Imagine if you lactated sand, that'd be the worst, wouldn't it? Fuck me. I thought you were in there, you were there. Here's a tell when he's losing a poker, he lactates sand. No funs, no funs. Just sitting there like, well I won't consider myself to be in trouble until I lactate sand. Just sitting there like well, I won't consider myself to be in trouble until I lactate sand So you get what?

So the movie comes to a solace The thing is, we're definitely talking about now, yeah The action scenes are horrendous But the the interpersonals are like some of the conversations are genuinely extremely good and well written Almost a good movie. That's the worst thing about it. There's a chat between Bond and M here that's particularly good where M's just like the Americans are upset and he's like, well, they got their man. They're like, she's like, they got his body and he's like, they wanted his soul. They should have made a deal with the priest.

I was like, lol, yeah, cool, cool, it's cool. It's changed James Bond again. Yeah, so what happened? Like this. Bond delivers Mr. White to this safe house, where they're going to interrogate him, and Emma's there with a guy called Mitchell, who...

The character Mitchell, by the choice, Mitchell. Remember him from the previous film? Mitchell, Mitchell, everybody. Let me say his name five times in this scene, and I'm like, you see, you're our pause? I'm simply saying, like, Mitch Hawkins in like, Kramer. Oh! Mitch, what's going on in there?

So like, yeah, if you're not familiar with some conventions of screen writing and you're not like an elite viewer like all of us, it may have passed you by, that the movie wants you to notice this guy, Mitchell, who's just like M's bodyguard and the second Bond comes in, he's like, I'm going out to check the perimeter and then I'll come back from having checked the perimeter and she's like, thanks Mitchell, the guy

we definitely know. And then he does come back in like, I'm just like, I'm pretty fine. She's like, she is Mitch. He's like, I, a right shirt again. Yeah. So of course this guy is obviously a double agent, right? But they go and they bring him in to interrogate Mr. White. Um, and, it's genuine, it's sort of a Joker moment, right? Because M M tries to to threaten him with torture

and he laughs her off. She goes, I'm longer it takes, I'm more painful for me to make it. Okay. Okay. Fully Joker mode laughing. Yeah.

I mean, I asked this great bit where he's like, oh, you know, we're always looking over our shoulders, say, oh, am I six and CIA there on our tail, though, and the truth is, you don't even know who we are. Like, you turn a weird glist. It's great.

And like, in the real standout bit from this scene, right, is the bit that actually manages to make the idea of specter or whatever, any kind of like shadowy organization terrifying is he goes, well, the first thing you should know about us is we have people everywhere. Isn't that right? Mitch or my best friend who then shoots Evan free, right? Easy. So good. So good.

It's genuinely chills. It's a great line. It's good. I'm so unique. Like, Evan has a line about it later where she's just like, look, people say we have people everywhere all the time. You don't expect they mean they've got someone literally in the room. It's true. I mean, secret agencies, they have people hidden all over the place. Isn't that right? Abigail Thorne. You never know which bridge of your

beloved YouTube is in podcast.es could secretly be working really Listen, I'm just gonna check the perimeter. I'll be right back So it's genuinely I don't know how much you want to talk about we can cut this But it's genuinely so fucking funny to me that they believe that a secret agent has chosen to use the cover of Starting a podcast about how much being a spy sucks. It's such a fun idea. And also with Drew from a national award because it was sponsored by the Security Service, it's all part of the cover.

Ah, doff for test too much, I reckon. Ah, she's like, reply to my tweets. Why won't you reply to the tweets? So at this point, however, having just had a great line, having just had the, we actually do have people everywhere, tentacles, wheels, or then wheels, then we then, the movie then has to suck dog shit again. So Bond fucking like chases Mitchell,

presumably his best friend, a big deal, because everybody's been talking about how cool Mitchell is. He's like Mitchell, you betrayed me, I can't believe this. After all the other times you're in all those other movies with me, and I was the same guy. He's like taking off a locket with Mitchell's picture in a car. The Craig shirt is just Mitchell. Just Mitchell. Yeah.

Craig and Mitchell best friends forever. He's got like a special shirt made, yeah. Craig can't make a lot of fishing trips. Listen, he and Mitchell were gonna retire to Jamaica together one day. And now Mitchell has betrayed him. Like, fucking, if you'd done it with a character we had ever seen, like, don't with Tanner't with Tanner right like his Tanner is in this movie

He's in a bunch of other movies as like M's guy, right? You hear the name Tanner you expect oh that's the like guy who like helps bond The concave axe The guy with the concave ass from years years. Yes, but like The guy with the concave ass from years and years, yes, but like If you had just done Tanner that would be more interesting than like mr. I'm going to check the perimeter fucking Conic lines perimeter Yeah, I mean I don't I don't want to look like I'm a close call out of school, but like we're giving him the good night cross the California

Star and the cronstein rosette simultaneously I don't know which I don't know which to give of anyway So it's a whole sadly post-humus because Bond chases Mitchell and this is all very stylishly intercut with footage of a horse racing It's like yeah, okay, I'm getting it. Fucking scene of it. It's like underground tunnels were it's dark. And then it's intercut with this horse race. But Bond does some like fucking parkour, right?

And then at this point, I wrote down uncharted ass, Shen Yunass, China before communism asked, but because they both get like knocked through a glass ceiling, and then they do some wire fighting on the end of ropes, because I guess that was also a thing at this point. It's kind of fine, it's a frictional, like. It's a physics puzzle, a Nathan Drake was fucking doing this on like,

like, the gravity gun, like, kind of funny. I mean, it is kind of funny, but they found a way to like work in a fucking wire fight like kind of organically And that they just both get caught up on wires and start jumping. It's like it's I I can't bring myself to hate this Like this this movie in general. I do actually quite like it. It's pretty forgettable, but I It's harmless. I have a theory about this movie, which I'll get to, as to why it frustrates me so much.

But I think for now, all I'll say is that I think it's that it's almost a good movie. It's like 70% of the way to being an unironically like good film star to film. It comes really, it comes bloody close. Yes. I just want to see a re-editor. I want to see somebody take all the footage they shot and just re-editor it. No changes to the script. You want to see the Frank Dara Bont cut of Quantum of Solace. I just want to see anything.

I want to see the events of this film. I want to see Quantum of Solace. Yeah, instead of like seeing like slices of it. So Bond is unfortunately forced to kill his best friend of many years. Mitchell. I don't know if the I don't even know if Mitchell was his first name or his his surname. It could be both could be Mitchell Mitchell. Scott. She's got one. You just got the one who's a might to monitor them. Yeah. He's Brazilian.

Mitchell in your. So yeah, yeah, Bond kills Mitchell. And Em gives him shit about it, because at this point, Mr. White has escaped. And Em, Em embarks on a course that she spends the rest of this movie doing, where she's like, oh, you do kill a lot of people, James. It's very inconvenient for me.

Mm, yeah. And it's like, come on, a movie ago that was table stakes that you were like using him as a blunt instrument and stuff. You can't now be like, listen, stop killing so many people. Every single movie, M, like, rolls a dice to decide what a thing is going to be for the movie. And this movie, she's like, you do kill a lot, don't you, James? That's true. That's true. Conven do kill a lot, don't you James? That's true. That's pretty quite inconvenient. Last one, it was you do kill a lot, James, hell yeah.

So they have to investigate Mitchell's betrayal, which means we have to go to another beloved franchise location, Mitchell's flat, where we've spent many happy hours. So it's just iconic. Relaxing, relaxing, watching Mitchell's what's out. The thing about every time you go to Mitchell's flat, it's a little different every time. I think is very interesting. Look, there is, there is one thing that I know this too, which is very funny, which is that, um, so, so like, M's, M's in Mitchell's flat, right, with all of her bodyguards. But when, when Bond walks in, he walks past a guy who looks almost exactly like himself.

The guy on the door, if you go back and I saved a screenshot of this, the guy he walks past on the door looks like a face-apred Daniel Craig. It's very entertaining. I presume that's because that must just be his stunt double. It's just a guy that's spied Daniel Craig. They didn't want to, they didn't like pay an extra because they've already got the stunt that was nice. That's probably true.

Anyway, so... Up until the time. Yeah, so, so M is up set. Yeah, M's up set. She's complaining. It's intercut with this like flashback montage set to, I can't see me loving nobody, but you. Yeah, all the times that like bond and Mitchell swing each other round and a pool on the beach.

Um, raccolout laugh. Oh my god, great rough. It's a little deep cut, but I thought I'd go there. So, very nice. Um, so she goes there and she shows she finds all of the like Christmas presents that she had, you know, that was actually a, that was, that's really in the film. That's and it was a really nice detail.

Like she's, she's like, look, there's two Christmas presents in this lab that I gave Mitchell Christmas. That I call him. He would try to. It's kind of missing talks about this. But like, I really like the idea of MI6 being a really wholesome office, just like in general. Like, they're all going, Like they're all going around signing to get well soon called for 009 again.

But also overlooking all the bond sexual assaults and body pain. Yeah, of course. I mean, there's like a secret Santa every year. It's a lovely little. Yeah, Avi, I think your thing was a huge branch getting bond to Toblerone for Christmas. Yeah. It's like, what does it do?

It's got a new guy in it. It's a love gift for all of us to say. It's just a love gift. Merry Christmas. Yeah. But like, you do get a sense of how little M knows this guy because she's like, look, I got him this nice ash tray and Bond goes, I don't think you smoked. So.

That's a nice detail. Yeah, it's fun. It's a nice touch, but they try to figure out why he did this. And the answer turns out to be that he had no money. And then in the most tenuous next location in the whole fucking you friend. You get an association of this one. No.

Okay, well, the guy says Porto-Prance Haiti. Yeah. All right. Okay, man. Okay, so, so we go back to MI6 and if you've ever seen the movie Iron Man with all the holographic tech, well, that's we've got a sci-fi Iron Man table.

Also, Rory Canere is here, one of Britain's best theater actors, he's gonna be Dana. And the most concave asses. That's a good question. He has a reference to the time on Trage Future when we watch the show Years and Years and there's one scene where he has his ass out and he has a remarkably strangely shaped ass.

So anyway, the MI6 buffins, like a few years ago, we introduced tagged bills into the Sheifur's money lending operations. It's so fucking tenuous. Some of them were in Mitchell's wallet. He just gets to spend them at a strip club that time him and Bond went. And also a bunch of other ones have just been paid

into a bank account in Haiti. What the fuck, and how did you just remember? Even had these because of this? Like M undercuts it, even in the scene where she's just like well that was ages ago I might even have one in my wallet like it's so fucking tenuous that it's like ah he didn't have any money you know what else is on money these tags that we introduced yeah they were just deposited by a guy called mr. surname do not get attached yeah mr. Slate in port of Pras IET

Sure, man. I don't know if you go Bond. So yes Bond goes to IET After three weeks of compassionate leave to one Mitchell He's sadder about that than he is about his fucking girlfriend absolutely every single like Daniel Craig Vespas scene replaced with Mitchell. I thought it was weird how every time he was in Casino Rial, Mitchell is like, I have a terrible secret James. And James always misunderstand him. In no time to die it opens with fucking fond going to Mitchell's fancy.

Let's keep this guy for five movies. I think we can gin this up. So Bond goes to Slate's her jar room and Slate attacks him. Yeah, this is the thing, right? Bond tries to do some spying, but because it's Craig Bond, this does not last for 10 seconds. Before the guy comes at him with a knife, we get the like heavily cut fight scene. Um, I had to rewind twice to figure out if Bond killed him and like how? Yeah, Bond, Bond, Bond, and he killed him.

Can you tell me? Can you tell me? By like stabbing him with a shot of broken glass from a window, he pushed him through. Is that what it was? Oh, okay. Oh, right. I thought he injected him with a syringe. No, he hits him with the, the, the, it's one of two times

in this movie, someone gets stabbed with a shard of broken glass. He gets stabbed with a shard of broken glass and then bonds sort of like philosophically, like looks around, but he's holding this guy down to his brain. He's just considered. Yeah, the other thing I was saying is, so anyone's noticed how fucking like the, all the ADR'd fighting sounds like it was recorded

inside a tin can. I guess I was like, oh, he's shit, I have a bad head. Well, I mean, listen, it's still an improvement. I knew it was not happening. It's still an improvement on her Majesty's Secret Service where they had that fight in the Rumpel of Cowbells. Oh, this was good, that was good. I've noticed a lot of the orthodox bonds Twitter accounts are now pretending that on

Her Majesty's Secret Service is good. And for that, I'd like to say that was not correct. We did that. We started that. Yeah, we invented this, everybody is following us, and also they're still wrong because they don't like it. They don't like it for the right reasons. Anyway. So Bond steals, steals this guy's jacket. And goes down to the front desk and says, oh, there's a briefcase here for you. Yeah. I pick that up now. Thanks. Accidental spying. I'm just, I'm still not

over the way he's like, so this guy's bleeding out right and he's like trying to staunch his neck when a bond's like slapping his hand away and holding him down and the effect is meant to be like you know bond is Nihilus now bond feels nothing he he kills emotionally but the effect is much to consider like I just told him down and like fill it up. I can't believe I'm looking at a real handsome plurid ring. Yeah. I gotta say, I really like Don't Know Grace performance. It was good.

It was good. Like, no slander against Daniel Craig, right? It like, good actor. He's just given a lot of bad movies to do. Sure. So the reason why I liked him and knives out so much, just because he was finally given a fun script and he's having a time of his life that you can see how much he hates. Sorry, go ahead.

It's hard to play like that Bond is pretending not to feel anything but really does deeply feel it when there's no lines. And like that's Craig's decision to play that way. I really respect his decision to play this. As we get closer to movies with actors that are still working, you will notice that ever going to become more and more enthusiastic. Also actors who may have some connection with you. Yeah, we're not going to be doing gold, dragon tatsy.

So fast. Also, we should not be stacking up and you're crazy No, I mean I have no interest is like after no, no, he's good I hope he forgives me for calling him Craig finger suck, although I'm referring to the character there Yeah, get him to get into listen to the podcast fuck it get him to come on. No, that would be horrendous There's one bond we should have on it's lasenby That much is clear him, but he's got his old He's first ex-self is where he's like been given a product to hold up and my god, he's dying He's like been given a product to hold up and my god, he's dying

Well anyway, so bond bond bond leaves the hotel with this case that he's got by accident Um, and is picked up in a in a tiny little sissy car by a beautiful woman Camille um, who thinks that he is Mr. Slate and she has arranged a meeting with him um, and so bond just kind of like bluffs his way through this, not knowing anything. Like he's choosing sort of like default conversation options and an RPG here. You're completely like middle of the wheelchair. Absolutely, absolutely. So she's like, you know, how much money do you want? He goes, yeah, make me an offer. I definitely know who I'm supposed to be I haven't been like invagled into this in the last minute and then

when also like he's like kind of flirting with her a little bit. She's kind of flirting back It's so nice that it's seen it is fun. Then she says oh, I open up the briefcase and he opens it up and it's a big Picture of her and the gun Way and the gun. He's like, he's like, huh, looks like someone wants to kill you and she can get in the trice to shoot. Yeah. It's kind of funny. Why would you arrange your contract killer this way?

Like, so fun. Like, you have to get in the car with, I'd be like, yep. That's her. Also, there's a guy on the bike, yeah, they're being followed by a guy on the bike and that's like, friend of yours and he's like, I have any friends and then she accelerates. So he opens up the briefcase.

It's got a big picture of her and a gun and he goes down. Someone's trying to kill you. She's not me though. Yeah. Rightfully. Yeah. That's crazy. I don't know who this is for.

This isn't my briefcase. He immediately gets like pushed out of the car and the guy who is tailing them comes up next and goes, you're supposed to shoot her. And you go, I'm missed. And then takes the bike off it. Great, perfect. Also adding to the big counter that I have in my head

of, number of times Bond has removed a guy from a motorcycle by just throwing them off of it. It's in the double digits. It's in the double digits, man. I can flip, see ya. Absolutely. It's quite good. So, um, yes. So, Camille escapes, and she escapes to the Euro-Trash Zone.

There is a man here with the worst haircut of all time. Would you like to know that man's name? It's never stated, but it is in the other spirit name, but please God say it. His name is Elvis, and he is. That's fucking right. And he is Swiss. He's wearing little fucking like Matrix glasses.

He has a bowl cut, and he's just there hanging out. He's our chief henchman. Mm-hmm. And we also meet our villain Dominic Green. Dominic Green, Matthew Amalric, who's Camille's boyfriend and hired the assassin to kill her. Yes, because he is very jealous. I love who she knows.

And very paranoid. Yeah, she tries to like, brazen that by being like, well, if I did betray you would I come back here and he just hits her with a bizarre line reading where he just goes, he's not talking to me like I'm stupid! Great, okay, okay, sure. I should point out, Bond has like been to the front gate given the guy his business card and asked Camille to call him and then is now sat on the opposite

here on this bike fucking loitering looking at them. And then I think about James Bondest is that he is white. Yes, that's true. That is true. I mean, you're not in Haiti. Yeah, it really does. He really does. Yeah, on a motorbike, just looking like a white side of beef. I think normal as hell. But then, very thankfully, very healthfully for bond, right? Much like sort of summer school, everybody decides, you know, we can have plot outside today. They have a warehouse, they have like, it's not fancy or anything, but it's indoors. And Bond has basically no way of eavesdropping, but instead, like Dominic Green just decides to sort of like threaten Camille and expound a bit about his backstory about his like jealousy and violence towards women. And then just go, yeah, listen, I know you're only with me to get to this other guy, General

Medrano, who was the deposed dictator of Bolivia. And there he is. And he's the one who's the idiot. Nine minutes. Yeah, so this movie has the balls, much like in the previous one, where it implied that Spectre had an advanced knowledge of 9.11, this movie has the absolute balls to say that Spectre facilitated the outsting of H and leader at our side.

Like what's the first thing with like deposed by Spectre in this? Spectre, they did this. And the real life in this deposed in 2004, for the second time, a question mark by the CIA possibly. But like the thing is, right, I hadn't said definitely. It wasn't my department. I wasn't involved in that particular one. There's, there's like two, we have people everywhere.

Um, there's, yeah, I mean, I haven't talked about it. She was involved in the Bolivian coup like a few years ago. I'm into minds about this line, right? Because on the one hand, I, I do kind of almost like the idea that like, oh hey, these are bad guys. Like Green explicitly says the reason why they did the coup was because you wanted to raise the minimum wage and that wasn't acceptable to corporations. So the corporations went to spectra and spectra had them deposed.

I like that. I don't hate this. Like again, it comes really close to being a good movie with things to say. On the other hand, I feel as if this is the same impulse that if you remember all the way back to Doctin O, right after the fish window, there's a painting on an easel there that they just walked past, unremarked upon. And it's a painting that was very recently stolen before the movie came out. And they added it to that set in order to suggest that, ah, what if Doctor No was the guy who stole it. And to me, I feel as if this is a very similar thing

of just like Googling Haiti, who, and going, ah, see, we're topical now. Why not just throw that one in? It's just a thing that happened recently, like, while they were making the movie. It could have very easily done a fictional, it could have been San Manique again, but so General Magrano is the deposed dictator of Bolivia and he comes to Green and is like, yo, I want a higher specter to give me back my country and Green is like, okay, cool. In exchange, we want this worth the strip of desert

in Bolivia. And Dona Madonna was like, there's no oil there. Everyone's looked and green's like, well, you know. And the important thing is, yeah. Maybe we'll get lucky also, if you want to, you could like rape my girlfriend. Yeah, good green, green, green goes like, like the important thing is, and this is like a fairy tale-ass condition, we have to have

whatever we find in this desert, and he says that very meaningfully. Incidentally, would you like to rape and murder my girlfriend? Because that's what he'd like hands Camille over to her, and he's like, oh, hey, I know her family, which we will find out more about later. And it's sort of like the sociopathic version of the like, walkin' threesome nod in fucking a few to a kill, because he's like, have fun, dropper over the side when you're done.

And it's like, mm. Mm. I like green as a villain. I remember at the time, people were like, oh, he's a bit wet, but I think he's actually good. It's a good performance. Not wet. He should have been wetter.

I mean, wet blowfeld. Wet lachifra. This guy is this guy dry or wet lachifra? He is dry lachifra. He's doesn't. He's doesn't the sheep. He's sand. He's sand blowfeld.

There is a nice moment where a few minutes earlier where they're standing on the edge of the dock and he's talking to his girlfriend, then Green looks over the dock and we see what they're seeing. And there's just like a corpse who's been tied to a block and drowned right beneath this feet. Yeah, a rock of all block. Yeah. It's really nice.

It's really nice. It's really nice. The geologist that she was attempting to see before. Who's literally in this plate. Yeah. Missed the terminus of strikes again. Absolutely. I mean, I'm into minds about Green as a villain because like, I don't know. I think, all right, I think what has happened here is that she was going to meet a geologist

who was then killed by Green and and replaced with Mr. Slant. Do you think Mr. Slant was like, oh, that's quite ironic then that I've killed it. Anyway, I'm in too much of a mess. I'm in too much about Dominic Green because like on the one hand, Matthew Maurex is very talented and he sells it quite well and he has some interesting dimensions to him. On the other, this is a sort of recurring theme with the now, with the Craig movies, where it's like, instead of, you know, sort of like evil mastermind,

it's Craig pursues sweating Euro-trash. Yeah, you can't stop doing this. Yeah, it's just like, it's a European man from like a, you know, a country that is not England who is just like Sweating profusely more as things go on At least he's not a Canadian man and yellow face That is that is true. That is true. So yeah, but Madrano is getting like a guy dode up by Spector that is the implication

um, and he gets on his little boat to go back to his yacht with Camille, and Bond steals a boat and like crashes into it just as she's about to get revenge and shoot Madrana. And he like bundled her off the boat and then takes her away. There's a boat chase which sadly also has the editing disease. Yes, I can't. Bond does something with a hook and, of course, it's a boat to fill up. I don't know what it is. I don't know what he does. He doesn't know what he does. He does like boat Jitsu. Yeah, not clear on the list.

A scene where fucking M and Tana, I think maybe one of her guys not Mitchel anymore sadly Are on the phone is like what about what about slate? He's just like bonds says he was a dead end, to which I'm going, is she fucking killed him? Another one. Another one. He killed him, didn't he? Ah. Yeah.

Like Bond medically cannot not kill the guys that M desperately wants to question. Absolutely. It's like a, it's like a disease of the trigger finger. Yeah, it's obsessive-compulsive disorder, but like, for murder. So, so, so, so so Camille gets knocked unconscious and bond just like thoughtlessly hands her off to a guy like he parks the boat at a hotel and then he's like yeah dude take care of this is my luggage or whatever. And then calls back into M to try and find out who Dominic Green is and what his deal is. He's he's a philanthrop, he's an ecology guy.

He owns a company called Green Planet who are buying up with the strips of desert around the world. There's a really fun bit where M calls the CIA and says, are you interested in Dominic Green? Are you keeping an eye on him? And we cut to in a plane, there's Felix Leiter and his boss, Mr. Beam. And then I've now been played by David Harbour.

David Harbour, who is the guy you heard in the beginning, who is like, I'm sure we do a nice people. And we've got no interest in Dominic, we're not keeping an eye on him. And they hang up and I'm like, they're definitely watching him. And then Rory can hear, how do you know? And she says, well, they just transferred me to the section chief of South America.

How would they even know to do that if they weren't following Green and Newell was that? Which is quite cute. Like, it's nice. They just phone about like, you know, you're interested in Green and they go, definitely no. And she like hangs up and goes, 100%. Yes.

And then even better, we see in the next scene, like the Green is driving to an airfield and gets on the plane with them. Like that right about to me, it's really, really fine. And so what Brian is doing, he's so good. Is he gets, he gets the universe. And the mustache in this movie too. One more side. He essentially gets their blessing for the coup.

And the way that he says this is it's a, absolutely a product of like the pink tide and the war on terror, right? Because he says, Venezuela, Brazil, now Bolivia, with Utah, it had been the Middle East, South America is falling like dominos. You don't need another Marxist-giving national resources to the people to you. Great, fantastic.

The thing is that he doesn't believe this, like, this is just pitching it well. Like, that's what I like about greenness. He's kind of unremarkable, but in a way that's on purpose. Yeah, he's also a massive hypocrite. And like, you know, he uses that to his advantage. It doesn't trouble him at all. And that's something that I like.

Because like, freevious blowfellets of various stripes, right? They've certainly lied about things before, but we've seldom seen them lie about things so nonchalantly just for conveniences sake. And we've seldom seen them do it with that sort of ideological framing. There's a bit towards the end of the movie where Green says, listen, we do it with the left,

we do it with the right, we do dictated, we do liberators, it's all gravy to us, don't give a shit. Which is great. I like that a lot. So, Green also says, you've got to kill this guy, James Bond. Yes, like the Felix Leiter is on the plane. And he tries to cover for him because David Harbour

shows him the photo and he's like, who is that? And Leiter goes, yeah, I did no idea. I've never seen him before on my life. Whereupon, Beam calls his bluff and says, that was James Bond from British intelligence. Yeah, again, everyone knows who this guy is. Yeah, the guy from the last movie, who you played poker with that one time.

He lived with him for 40 years. Yeah, he lived with him. He was $5 million to buy back in. Do you remember that? Yeah, do you remember when you lost a leg? He foes so of you, and Mitchel on a fishing trip. He was so good. You're all good.

You're all good. You're all good. How do you go? You're all good. Matt. No, I've never heard of him. I really like Felix in this scene. The Jeffrey Wright has like one line in this whole scene, but you can just, he's so good.

You can tell he just fucking hates this, he hates that this deal is happening. Yes, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and gonna be a coup in Bolivia and the CIA are gonna be like, well, we don't know anything about this, as long as they get the oil that green fines. Yes. Green's like, yes, you can have all of the oil. When they're getting the oil, they're still skinned like a little twinkle in his area. Be careful, like if we find any oil, you'll have it all.

It must be an chance by midnight. It's moving closer and closer to Roger Moore's voice. It turns that into water. It turns that into water. It definitely oil. It's fine. Little birthday birthday boy. So Bond is like following this plane.

He knows where it's going. And so both he and Green arrive at Braggents in Austria. In order to see my favorite opera, Tosca, which is being staged, I think the actual production is like in Switzerland, it's like staging on legs, it's a big eye, it's very cool. And clearly, like the, you know, location scout has clearly seen this and gone,

ah, that'd be fucking cool. Let's do that. Which I heartily agree with. So Bond does his best move, which is find a guy, knock that guy unconscious in a bathroom and lock the bathroom. But he notices that the guy that he has knocked unconscious was, he got a different pack with the program from everybody else. And his has a little earpiece and in a thing

that has now aged horribly, a little lapel pin that just says, Q. I think it's so funny. It's so funny. It's so funny. It's a little secret society lapel pin. It's different to be Q. It's a little secret society, lapel pin. It's a little gold, a little tiny gold cue. It says, I meant to be lapel Mike, I guess.

Yes, yeah. And it is also quite cute. Oh, that was my sentence. And so, what they're doing is the various heads of the secret society, quantum, or as Matthew Amalric pronounces it every society, quantum, or as Matthew and Mauric pronounce it at every time, quantum. It's spectacular, but they don't have the rights to say spectacular. But they eventually were just like, I fuck it, we're not going to get the rights for specter. It's quantum. It's quantum. It's not excessive for now,

to intelligence. Now, it's, yeah, by now's intelligent. Terrorism lines back up again. Urvangion and mextortion. That's it. That's... Woundsome. So, that's... So, that's... Quash, the language I get. And remember, Quantium. Quantium. Quantium.

So... Yeah, thank you. I'll have a murenge development. So what what what penguins is doing? I really love this podcast. That's such a nice time. They're doing a sort of like a Microsoft Teams meeting, but they're all in the audience of Tosca while it's literally during the execution scene. So while Tosca is fucking belting out the fucking thing about dying with honor and shit before he gets fucking shot, they're trying to talk into their little lapels over the sound of concert hall acoustics, which is very funny to me. I'm sure it sounds real good. But I'm just like, dick out, balls both firmly like this.

I like it too. So Bond is listening in and he listens in enough to like get the hint of what's going on, which is this secret society that do. Yeah, they're doing this thing in Bolivia that requires a lot of pipeline. It's called Project Tiara. Yeah, the Greens like I've been laying so much pipe and Bolivia. Absolutely. A huge amount of pipe. And so yeah, there's some controversy within it quite a bit about whether or not this is like the best priority. But green is insistent that like this is the resource of the future, right?

And so as such, we got this has to be job number one. And then what Bond does is he kind of beats the grouse, right? He gets on the call and he's like, you know what's up, James Bond here, how's it going? Ayo, what's up, James Bond here, how's it going? Ayo, what's up? What's up? It's a boy around the like and subscribe and hit that notification button. Oh, I'm just like, you know, I'm just like,

Oh, time for me to leave. Once that's a playing drop, it's time nice point. It's genuinely, it's really good. It's very clever. And Mr. White is there in the audience who figures out that this is happening and just stays completely seated,

like takes out his headphones and says to the last next to him, some people have no stomach for opera. Yeah, it's cute. It's nice. Like you can just stay completely still and you will not get found out, but James has just taken pics and shooting it straight to him. It's fantastic. And so we identify some of these guys, one of them's like a Russian

oligarch, one of them's an ex-mosad guy, one of them is the prime ministers very own special advisor, Guy Haines. And so, of course, immediately, while all of these guys are leaving, they activate, okay, you've got to kill this guy right now mode. Need to kill this motherfucker right now. I said to myself. Yes, yeah. And so, the various bodyguards, like attempt to intercept Daniel Craig, and we get what I think is a very elegant scene of him sort of shoosing his way out into cut with a scarpler fucking like menacing Tosca's girlfriend. I'm sure that this scene is great if you know what Tosca is, but my notes just say, what if your footage of a thing was in to cut with footage of another thing?

I mean, it's not synonymically abogale. What is that? You know, that's movie, a keynote, maybe. It's not profound as it would suggest, but it's still, I still liked it. I still liked it. I like it. What if we had a sex scene, but instead of showing the sex,

like we cut to a flower opening? Yeah, we're trying to go into a tunnel. We're trying to go into a tunnel. Hey. I love you guys so much. Oh, God, we can't have a mate. So Bond then holds up a guard, Metal Gear Solid style. He puts a gun on a guy and he's like, right, who do you work for?

And the guy tells him to piss off. So Bond drops him off a roof. Non-fatally in fact. Yeah, he survives it, but lands on the car of Mr. Green. And then this is another great part that I really like. And one of the things that also sold quantum to me is the guy lands on the the bonnet of Green's car. And Green goes to his bodyguard. It's not one of ours. He says no. Then why is he looking at me?

And he like hides his face while his bodyguard gets out and shoots him. It's very good. I like that. There's also a occasion to remark from my older brother than I'll never forget when he said, I preferred Connery Bond because he was so cool and I felt like I could never be that.

But I feel like I could be Daniel Craig's Bond if I just went to the gym a lot and kicked people. That's not a sight. Yeah, I do that. And it's not actually our fun, but. Yeah. Well, the crucial thing do that and it's not actually fun, but. Well, the crucial thing about Conor is Bond is that he seems like he's having fun, whereas Craig Bond seems miserable all the time because Daniel hates the character of James Bond.

I don't think he hated it yet in this. I think you still have in front, yes. Yeah, I thought we get to the third one. Yes, I thought it's definitely the movie that like afterwards he did an interview where he was like, I would never doing one of these fucking movies again, and I needed to. Yeah, absolutely. Because they had to just ply him desperately. Yeah, because this is a movie about bond struggling with nihilism and both bond and the

movie lose. They both get subsumed with their own. It's a movie about something like that's what I At this point I'm so used to the long wars where I keep having nightmares about finding unknown Films we just have to keep going on with Where it's just a thing happens over and over again, and it's all like it just keeps echoing past movies back and forth Like a machine AI to watch every Roger Moore film, and then I don't know what. This is a movie that like, whoever not it pulls it off,

at least thinks it has something to say. Yeah, yeah. Roger Moore in twice is a night to kill. Yeah, I genuinely get a tweet along these lines. Yeah, we're gonna have to do a bonus episode that is twice the night of the jail. Roger Molyan, I'm majesty's kill. Yeah.

I'm majesty's never dies again enough. Yeah, I wrote fucking on the James Bond account. He was in his own, I wrote creepy pastor of the EKJB podcast getting stuck in the more years reviewing a seemingly infinite spate of more bond films that no one else has ever heard of. The man with her majesty's gun. I like quoted that with a new episode,

twice as two few Roger Moore goes to 1984, Sarajevo Olympics and involves himself in a frankly egregious number of skiing scenes. Also, Sheriff J.W. Pepper is there, and he's being racist to a different Yugoslav ethnic group in every scene. Moonburts! Moonburts!

Yeah! Okay. Sorry, Yop. If we make a kill if a bon style poster for Moonburts, we will sell that as a fucking post. Oh my God. It's like a really old. So M has to like, M is now mad at Bond, because the guy that he dropped off of a roof

was a special branch officer. He was Guy Haynes' bodyguard. Bond has now killed a cop. And as such, he has to like come in and be debriefed and also the Americans want him like off the case And cancel the bonds credit cards. Yes, and there's a really cute scene where he tries to buy an airline ticket and his card gets declined And then he flits of the later says you're gonna get a phone call in a minute Could you please tell them I'm going to Cairo? And she's like, of course, she is. Nice.

It's nice. I like that. He makes it clear in a way he says that he's not going to be going to Cairo. And she's like involved in a little bit of a trick. It's nice. She likes it. Yeah, it's fun. But then he somehow gets to Italy, not quite sure.

And he teleports Italy. I'll just question Mark. And he visits Mathis. You remember our boy Mathis? Emma Mathis, who was just not a double agent. That was actually Vespis. He was thinking off and he just had the guy he had tortured by accident. He rocks up and he's like, yo, you're doing. Sorry, mother. Like, did you get my card? Incidentally, Mathis is girlfriend. Hello. But she's just hanging out in her bikini and Mathis is like, well listen, you did have me tortured. Therefore, why would I help you get a passport

and new credit cards and help you get to Bolivia? And she goes, well listen, they bought you this villa, so you kind of do owe him. And this is enough to sway Mathis. So he gets him the thing. To me, that's so fun that they were told this guy was a double agent. They like torture him for information.

It's clear he isn't. And then they just go, sorry about that chap. Have a villa. Have a house. That's quite a nicer time package as far as I'm concerned. He's wearing a sweater around his neck. He's like having a nice time. But Bond then goes, come with me.

And Mathis is like, no. And I wrote down, boys trip because immediately Mathis comes with. That's it. That's not fucking too obvious. I mean, you've got to get it like with previously Mitchell would have come along on this. But of course.

Yeah, yeah, it's hard to fill the void with Mitchell. It's not right with just the two of them. We actually even see Bond in the first class cabin of the plane getting right asked because he's sad about Mitchell. The first time we see Bond drunk, as opposed to drinking. Yeah. And it actually genuinely really liked the scene.

Imagine it's like, what if you had to which the bartender reads out again the Gordon's gin, the extremely fucking annoying drink order that he has? Yes. And then he goes, a ten of them. Can't even get fucking Keena Lelae anymore. He even like, especially when he goes Keena Lelae, which is not the move that you can't get. I'm like, they don't make it any more. Anyway. So yeah, this is like Bond, his like, lowest ebb.

And this is, you get a sense of how he's like been sustaining himself, and this is, you get a sense of how he's like been sustaining himself, but post like Vest Bertramma, which is drinking alone in an entirely grey and darkened room. And it's just grim, it's grim. It's really nice, like really quiet touching. It's the first time in the whole franchise where I've actually like, you know, I've kind of felt a bit sorry for Bond. Yeah. And I've tried it again to grey again the writers, that was actually like, you know, we've kind of felt a bit sorry for Bond. Yeah. And I put it again to cry again the writers.

So this is like, so so Bond and Matt has land in, I guess, LePas. Whereupon, they're confronted and the movie shits itself once again by an a curious woman named Fields, whose line is like, and I did note this down to like future uses. You're tempted, Flee. I will arrest you. Drop your fin jail and take it to the plain chains. Understand. Which is very nice, but like, this feels, they go, is that surname of first name, and she's like, it's just feels.

But in the script, crucial name is strawberry fields, which is activating a little thing in my like, spy trivia low, because that's also the name of the CIA subcamp at Guantanamo Bay. Or was? I would know. I've never been there and anyone who says I have his line. It's a very dark, internal CIA joke because the Beatles song is Strawberry Fields forever, which is the implication of keeping people in the fucking Guantanamo Bay.

It'll be there, whatever. Yes. So, she tries to confront Bond. She tries to, like, turn him around. Uh, and Bond just, like, he has another charming, funny, well-written moment, right? Because the plane doesn't leave until the morning. So he's got to stay overnight. She takes him to him at like a shitty hotel

and he's like, Oh, that's a great one. I don't want to stay here. This, you know, it looks terrible. And she's like, but our cover is teachers on sabbatical. He's like, yeah, I'll fix that. They go to the best hotel in town. He walks up to the desk and goes,

we're teachers on sabbatical who have won the lottery. Wow. I think I go, congratulations. Perfect. It's like perfect, nice. It's really good. I hate that this is good. Like, I feel like I'm going soft, but it's just that they've

like figured out how to make a movie. Well, I'm going very hard. Hell yeah, Bobby. And she's a right head. No, no, no, not because of that. But because this little sequence where they go across town and then they change hotels and so on, I know that it's all in service of padding out the runtime on the pussy clock. Because as soon as they get to the hotel room, Craig and Fields Shag, and it's three minutes

exactly on the pussycock. I believe the notes that I took during this were just do not have effects with this man and then I fuck the low key bond music has begun. Yeah. Afterwards, she's like, I'm so fucking mad at myself. And like, we are also mad at you, like three minutes and those scenes with the hotel exist just to pat it out. Yeah Oh, yeah, no, I could it they could have cut straight from I'm strawberry fields to Like it would have been so because because we are freeing them out as much. Yeah, snatching up the Am school

So because everyone in the world knows who James Bond is he gets invited to Dominic Greens party, right? And Dominic Green's party is sort of like his ecological side. And I just want to note here, right? Do you remember the world is not enough? I try to forget, but yes. OK, I'm going to present you two drops in the Insus section.

Well, man is golden-cat. I'm going to present you two drops. One from Moon Percy. And one from Quantum of Solace. And I want you to know, both of these films were written by the same people. The bright, stary, oil-driven future of the West. We are an inspiring, environmental decline. We're all looking for the guy who did this. These movies are new, not even a year's a pass.

What's happened in the interim nine years and we've gone from the bright starry oil driven future over the West to ecological spiral. Yeah, because 9-11 happened and everyone was like, oh, nothing can ever get better. Now the vibe is bad now. Oh, I guess at least it shows that we have shifted the dial on the public discourse about climate change. That's true. We're doing it good because the economy is still under democratic control, but I mean, at least people are talking about it. So, I'm not why we're dying at least. Yeah, so, so, so, so, so, so, Mathis goes to like Shmoos with his friends, the addresses. The Colonel who is the head of the national police. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, and she goes, hey, we didn't use a lot of logging rights

to that land you bought. And so he tries to kill her. He tries to get rid of her, right? She tries to defuse the situation by being like, you wouldn't kill me. I'm just a sexy woman. But it does not work because Damien Green, a dominant green, does not like women. And he enjoys killing women So he's about to push her off of a balcony when Bond like rescues her by being like, ah, there you are

Bond then leaves with Camille thinking I will certainly not get owned. He then gets owned He makes it he makes it two streets away before the cops pull him over. And so funny is that during this scene, like, strawberry fields has absolutely no indication that bond is in danger. She just hasn't seen him for 45 seconds and is like, right, I got to check on this dickhead. And he is completely in danger. And she trips the guy down the stairs to help him out. Oh, yeah. And that is the last we see she arrives. Yeah, and she trips the guy down the stairs to help him out. Oh, yeah, and that is the last we see of her. Yeah, I hope you went attached to that character

every minute. I hope you enjoyed strawberry fields. Meaningful character out of the lodge of the film, RIP. Absolutely. So, so Bond. We're losing all the grates this morning. Missiles, strawberry fields. Yeah, so Bond gets pulled over,

and that's exactly what happens. They tell him, open the trunk and he's exactly what happens. They tell him open the trunk and he's like, and why would you want me to do that? Opens the trunk and there's Mappis in there. I'm not sure if he's like Binh San conches. Yeah, he's just unconscious So the cops try to kill them both and Bond uses Mappis as a human she goes. Yeah, the impression is that it's like a human shield I think it's supposed to look accidental But he's just like picking him up and they draw their guns and he turns around in time,

but it does like it gives the effect of whoop. He's like, you know, you get shot twice and he goes, oh no, Mathis. Obviously he kills the cops and then he like sits in the road and has a very touching scene with Mathis. Yeah, that's a nice. Mathis is trying to like rescue him from his nihilism. He's like, you have to forgive Vesprin.

You have to forgive yourself. It's also really interesting that the most touching physical intimacy we see in this film is between two men. It's this scene between when Craig is like holding Mathis. I mean, he like kisses, you know, like, fields a little bit up a back and it's like sexy. But the actual like intimacy in human connection is between two men, it's between Bond and Mathis

and this scene is really touching. Absolutely. And then Bond's, and then Bond. And Richels dumps his body in a trash can. Yeah, and a skip. Yeah, then puts his body in a skip and takes his money and fucking Kimmo's like, what? And he's like, he wouldn't care. Don't worry. Which is probably true, but still.

Yeah, it's true. I really like this. But this can be like, is this how you treat your friends? You just dumped his body in a skip. And Bond says, on the verge of tears, he's like, you wouldn't care. Like, it's honestly beautiful. It reminds me a bit of Ronin, actually, of this way in which spies sort of like make a fetish

of like their own callousness. And within that, they sort of conceal quite a lot of very deep feelings. Almost to good film. It's a good film. In the skip, delivers that line. and then almost like double down on it, goes back to him and takes his wallet. Yeah.

Like, so having had this good scene, the movie has to like shit all over it again. Absolutely. They have to go to the like empty quarter, the desert, which dominant green is buying. And they do this through a medium of what I've written down here is silly. I forgot about the airplane bullshit. It was shit. There's one good thing about this. And this is Bond's cynicism because he buys a plane off of a guy.

And he's like, and Camilla asks how much he wanted for it. And he says, well, he wanted you, but I gave him the car. He will make more when he sells us out. And then as they're like taking off the plane, you see the guy on the phone selling them out. And I appreciated that. I thought that was good. I like a cynical bond.

It's nice that Craig is just like, yeah, no, this is gonna happen and I'm not mad about it. I knew it was going to happen. On to playing gets ambushed by the I guess Air Force. With the V&F, it's a spurs. Yeah, they get shot down, but they escape by like tandem parachuting into a hole. Also, he's in the big plane from loop on the third, which I like. That's true.

It's going to go up. There's the guys in the yellow car there. I should rewatch loop on the third. Yeah. So at this point, we cut back to London, because M is in trouble with the foreign secretary. You're talking about it. Big and Smith. Yes, yes.

Great idea. That's funny. And we get some fantastic ideology, because we're also nice and good-seen bad-seen. And so the good-seen is M goes, well, wait a second, but this dominant green guy, he's bad. And the foreign secretary just goes, say all right, say green is a villain.

If we refuse to do business with villains, we'd have almost no one to trade with. The world's running out of oil, Em. The Russians aren't playing ball, the Americans and Chinese are dividing up what's left. Right or wrong doesn't come into it. When he walks in there as well he has a great line which is like, I am what you're excused today is bond legally blind.

But this is Tim Piggett Smith playing the foreign secretary so he's playing Liz Truss. So in real life he could be like, I'm opening up new pork markets with specter. And you can't be. Also, fuck trans women for no reason. You just like yells that mid-sea. You have to be a pro-scientist about everything except trans women. Um, so yeah, no, this is, well, yeah, this is sort of like the, the, the, the defense by necessity of an evil foreign policy is like, again, it gives us a movie that's struggling with nihilism and it's movie that you support markets are trans-well-the-tests.

It's like, it's like, we live in an evil world and therefore the best thing that we can do is try to like navigate it according to our own sort of pragmatic best interest. And there's no point in having like an ethical foreign policy because nobody else is ethical, so why should we be? I really like this. I really like that this film is making an effort to engage with the political context that has so far been like a milestone around the neck of the franchise. Sure. It's more like the fact that the movie ends up being subsumed by that kind of nihilism

is like that's a fairly, but I give it points to like engaging Seriously and critically with it because M's response to this is like despite having been portrayed since gold Nies like this accountant is being counted as pragmatist she's like well, okay, but actually I think bond is onto something And I'm gonna like let him continue to go off the books Tassantly like the foreign secretary tells her, you know, bring him in or the Americans are gonna kill him. And she's like, oh, yes, sure. I'll totally do that.

So meanwhile, back in the hole, Camille and Bond are like hanging out. Camille explains why she wants General Medrano dead. And the reason is her dad was in the military junta in Bolivia, General Medrano then killed him, raped her mother and sister in front of her and then burned the house down. And therefore, she's been out on like a quest

for revenge ever since. And Bond empathizes with this. They have this sort of shared grief thing. Yeah, Bond has a genuine moment where he was like, Oh, when I pulled you off the boat with him and she's like, I've waited for that opportunity for years and he's like, Sorry. It's really nice. It's really nice scene.

It's beautiful. And she is a character who has a lot of like interiorizing, who has her own reservations and like, it's like, Timikon do that with fields, but yeah. Which is why he doesn't have sex with her, right? Because he has sex with one woman, their own reservations and right is that the Quantum has been blasting dynamite in order to create dams in order to Like dam off underground riverbeds to create an artificial drought or as as bond memorably puts it

Don't want to green to suck this bass dry I like it. Think of this bass drawing. I guess so. So they can't just blow up this one damn and leave. They have to like actively stop him. And then when they walk out of the desert into the nearest town, we see, and this is a great move, we see that the water shortage is causing suffering.

Yeah, we see the actual people. Yeah, we see the consequences of the villains plan. And I'm like, oh, brilliant. I can't believe we've not thought of this before. And the fact that they're like showing like the repercussion. Indigenous people also. Yeah, they're all genuinely like Indigenous- indigenous beloved people, which is a good choice. Like, absolutely.

Ah. This isn't like a diamond company is gonna lose some money. This is like a real human suffering. Absolutely. So Bond and Bond and Camille walk back to their fancy hotel. Camille immediately just like, you know, she always sounds as immediately leaves. Bond is sort of captured by MI6 and M does the most

cake having and eating it out. I hate this so much. Yeah. This whole scene is one of the M classics, which is where she's like, hang on a minute, let me find my notes because I was doing this. Yes, because the classic, when she goes, bond your piece of shit. Look what you've done. You've got another innocent woman killed. All right, now go get him big boy. I love you. Yes, we'll kiss on the cheek. Because what has happened is that Fields, our second favorite character after Mitchell, has been killed. And the way that she has been killed is that she has been drowned in crude oil on the bed of the hotel room. And this is a very conscious parallel to Goldfinger.

And the thing is, this is where I'm going to expel my theory about this movie. The things that make it almost a good movie. Even though it's by accident, the fact that quantum is different from specter, right? The fact that bond is different from previous bonds. This is a movie that is one foot out of the like cell door of the fucking prison cell that is the bond franchise is condemnation to like be repeating itself forever.

Right? It's almost inventive, it's almost new, it's almost something innovative. That's the thing that I cherish about it. And then this fucking death and this confrontation about it is the hand on the back of the collar, yanking it right the fuck back to the same

patterns of Connery bullshit that it's been stuck in since 1962. They should never have got the rights to spectre back. I wish that guy had lived longer because the franchise would have gone better if it hadn't. This is a movie spectre. I have some fucking thoughts and we'll get to it remarkably soon. The thing about this this fucking movie is that I like quantum. I like that quantum is this different to bond. If you look at the like description of this movie on Amazon, right? The it's picking up an hour after the end of Casino Royale.

On's journey leads him into conflict with the murky organization called quantum, et cetera, et cetera. Now murky there feels like a choice because you would say shadowy if you meant like a specter like thing, but murky is right because you don't really understand what the fuck is going on, like what their deal is, what their goals are. They see them and you said this in the group, you're out. It's like they're just a bunch of rich guys laughing. Yeah, absolutely. That's good. That's a good take. That is. It's what it's what I sort of like a rich criminal would do having grown up watching

Bond movies. It's like people imitating Spectre because Spectre is too silly to be real. Quantum isn't like this idea that like rich people would be capable of having a conference call what they agree to do a coup and they wear little fucking lapel pins. That does nothing implausible about that. I've been infected to several meetings like that. Yeah, I believe that can and will and has happened. Like, absolutely.

Absolutely. And yeah, no, it's sort of a reprieve from Bond's silliness that will not last into even the next movie. No, go on now. This is like the high watermark for Craig Bond. The Craig thing is. But this film wasn't well reviewed critically, I think is a real shame, because if this had

been edited in a more coherent way and had come out and done really well, that we could be in a more coherent way and like had come out and done really well that we could be in a different world. Another part of why this movie didn't get like reviewed particularly well is that it's short. It's remarkably short for a Bond film. It's 100 minutes. Absolutely. And that was a major point of contention with critics at the time. Yeah, and you can tell sort of like there's a relationship to the quality of a movie, but that we talk about based on how long it takes us,

like the pacing for this one, even with me trying to like move things along is still like we might end up talking about this movie for like longer than this movie actually has, you know, lines in it. There's like, I don't know, there's a lot to get into here and there's more to talk about than there is just in the text

Presented to you, which is the sign of a good movie. Yeah. So bond has bond bond goes back to his other other best friend Felix Leiter. It's not the same without Mitchell Because he escapes he gets arrested by my six and then it gets escaped Yeah, and and of course we have the thing and haven't seen by MI6 and M's orders and then he escapes and meets over M and she's like, all right, go on then. Yeah, she's just like, she just put like four guys in a lift with him in order to get them beaten up by James Bond, which is, I don't know, that's probably not a very strange. Sadly, he doesn't hit Emma this time like he did in the magazine.

He should have done it. How could any of my bodyguards betray me, asks woman who regularly has them beaten up by James Bond for no reason? I'm with a mixture on this, actually. I'm starting to think. There is a cute line earlier on where we do get a hint that Emma does have a special sauce for Bond because he tells Camille a Dominic try to, he tried to kill somebody a woman in my life, she's like a girlfriend, he's like, no, no, your mother? No, but she

likes the thing she is. It's quite, it's quite sweet. Which they, we do take some time to explore the next movie. Yeah. So, so, so Felix obviously is like expected by his boss beam to betray Bond. So he agrees to a meeting. And then they have a nice little discussion. And Bond expounds on some nihilism. And in another great line, right, Lighter pushes back on it, and this is a dialogue. You know, I was just wondering what's that America would like if nobody gave a damn about Coca-Cola communism.

It was impressed me the way he was calm this place up. The big fed is the compliment coming from a Brit. Coca-Cola communism. It was impressed me the way he was calm this place up. I'll take that as a compliment coming from a Brit. Just the nice. It's good. It's a fucking throw away time and it's so good. Ah! Like, okay, now maybe people listening to this being like, hang on, I thought this was the podcast day.

It's James Bond. Listen, we like a good movie. Like this has happened a few times. Generally just like a good movie we enjoy. But don't worry, this won't stick around. No, no, of course not. So enjoy this. We got one of these per bond.

Yes, so lighter than tell him everything he needs to know, which is the coup is going to go down after Dominic Green goes to this eco hotel in the desert called La Pella de las Dúnaas and pays off the chief of police and general madrán. And then once they do that, they can move. Incidentally, there's a CIA death squad who's about to come and kill you so you should run now. And they do some more parkour, James Bond, fucking Michael, they Shit, in order to escape. Not important. Him and Camille, Bond and Camille, go to the desert,

and they have another good interpersonal scene because Camille is like, obsessively cleaning her pistol because she's nervous about killing my drama. And he kind of like talks to her about revenge and he says, you know, you only have one shot so you like, you make it count, but you know, you know, you should, you should trust yourself and you're training and it's, it's good. He doesn't do what Merbon does and says, oh, well,

if you try and take revenge, then you'll have an ungainly gate. He just takes it as a red that she's going to seek revenge and he's like, is it by somehow the duty of the city? Yes, absolutely. God, so... They're both of them. Yeah, I mean, it would be particularly rich of craigabond and that way, if you like. Oh, you can't do revenge. You can't have an outdo.

Two graves of... So we see Madonna with the chief of police. Madonna like orders of beer and there's an attractive waitress and you're like, are they gonna rape her on screen to establish that he's a rapist, something that we already said he was. Yeah, they do do that. And it upsets me because, okay, all right.

I'm not one of these people who's like, you should never depict rape in a work of fiction. It can be a way to do that. And it can even be a way to do that with a female character. We're not massively invested in. What we did not need is a panty shot. No.

And it's in there. And it's in there. It's in there. And I'm like, okay, we didn't need that. That's an error. So, Dominic Green is gonna suck the country of Bolivia off, right? He arrives with two cases. Suck them dry.

Yes. He arrives with two cases of money, one for the chief of police, one for the general. He's off the chief of police. And then he reveals his like masterstroke to General Medrana, which is, okay, all of that empty land you sold me, that has all of your water under it. We're now your exclusive water provider and you're going to pay us some last-in-a-s right for it. And General Madrano refuses initially.

And he pitches this to him as, listen, we don't give a shit. We work with the left and the right. If you don't sign it, you know, if you think that we won't kill you, then just shoot me now and like have a good night's sleep. But otherwise, you know, we're just going to depose you in turn. Also during this, he says the phrase, I was in your mouth just in case you needed to see that. Sorry, what was that? I'm not sure. It was balls in your mouth. Oh, right. Oh, thank you. Balls in your mouth.

Balls in your mouth. So at this point, bond and cameo attack. Also, we should mention the hotel is like fueled with like hydrogen fuel sounds. Could it use cellophane, is he running the desert, but whatever? Because of ecology. And like at one point, the chief of police

literally goes like, there's like a bomb probably. Oh well. As the... We're gonna stand on my men next to these red barrels. Absolutely. I love to check the red barrel room. We record every episode of this podcast in the red barrel room. I've just got one behind me in the web.

Absolutely. Absolutely. We're in the red barrel. I've just got one behind me in the web. Absolutely. Absolutely. We're in the red barrel room talking about our favorite pass codes. And yeah. Yeah. So there you go. Just put an escalation mark after it's final.

And Bond sets off the hydrogen fuel cells with a straight shot. At this point, dominant green activates sicko mode. Yeah. And just starts attacking Daniel Craig with a fire axe. And like, Daniel Craig is a foot tall of a misman. But green just like goes ape-shed. If your malware activates like, you know,

never pick on the quiet kid in the back of the class mode. Yeah, exactly like really good. He's screaming of every swing to get the software to do it. I should point out like so so Madrana was like in this room where he has taken this waitress in order to rape her, right? And then the building starts blowing up. Bond kills the chief of police in a really bizarre way where he lands on his car has the time to say the complete sentence. You and I had a mutual friend and then shoots him. I like that he says it so fast though. I think it's good.

I had a mutual friend planned and half the time to be like, you were not. I had a mutual friend. Pop out. Yeah. With Craig, he's like, okay, I do need to get the line out, but I also need to shoot this guy ace up. So you need to meet your friend.

Get the line out like I just landed on a car. So what? You're like landed on a car The hotel is now blowing up at this point. It's fully aflame and I wrote down here Madrano is insanely committed to rape because He has not decided to leave at this point. He's just still in there trying to rape this wait for the problem is that he's identified as a woman. Oh, shut up. Jesus. I just said, I didn't fucking understand what you said.

It's again, it's like the last time when when Avis said that dolphins can sense pregnant women where he's going Ah, and then two seconds they were like women Interesting the thing about Madrano is that they forgot to give him a carry to trade other than rapist so far So he just like that's all he can do. He's just defaulting The racial politics of this movie Certainly not perfect and one of the reasons not is that one of the antagonists is literally just Boino Exolente. So.

Excuse you, that's generalissimo Boino Exolente. I'll tell you, that man is the president of Bolivia. So. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. So fucking Camille breaks into the room. We get the panty shot of the rape victim for some reason. Camille usheres her out of the room into an exploding burning hotel.

We never see her again. Yeah, best of luck out there. Yeah, good luck. Enjoy yourself. I think she still has a hand tied at this point. So, yeah, she's going to have an interesting time. And at this point, she's going to have an interesting time. Um, and at this point, she's, we cut back to Bond and, and Matthew, Malorick Fising, and we hear a gunshot, right, because he's trying to menor

sage. He's like having lost one rape victim. He then tries to move seamlessly onto another. Again, in a burning down hotel. Burning. How how long does it think we're gonna last right? Because like the it we've got about two and a half minutes before the hotel explodes. Yeah, in a screen time. Absolutely, like how are you going to complete whatever man fucking. Anyway, yeah.

And it's dark characters. Yeah. So we hear the gunshot and green like taunts bond by going like, oh, looks like you lost another one because he assumes that Medrana has killed her. Of course, there's the other way around. Bond acts as green through the foot. I feel like it green does it himself, is the same.

Yeah, you're right. He dodges out the white swinging. Yeah. It's difficult to tell here. He acts as himself in the foot and falls off and Bond catches him by his air And is holding him by his hair, which I was like, oh Jesus Bond then just like ditches him to go and rescue Camille Mm-hmm who is currently having a panic attack because Madrano like burned her house down with her inside and so she's trapped in a burning room

And this is like her worst nightmare. And so as they get trapped in their bond considers mercy killing her, he walks in and he sucks her fingers immediately. Yep then he sees there's a hydrogen fuel cell in the corner and he shoots that instead and blows a hole in the wall. But it's genuinely quite a harrowing. Yeah, that gets well done. Absolutely. Again, it's like one good scene, one bad scene.

This movie can't stop flitting between a good deconstruction of Bond and then just doing Bond again. It's all the dialogue scenes. It's fascinating. Most of the dialogue scenes are great. And then just, Bond again. It's all the dialogue scenes. It's fascinating. Most of the dialogue scenes are great. And then just, okay, second to last good scene to talk about. Oh, boy.

Bond, then like, he sees Camille off. And then we get what I think may be the single sadistic thing, most sadistic thing. We see Bond do in the entire franchise. He takes green out to the middle of the desert. He has already interrogated him. He's told him everything he wants to know. And then in revenge for Fields, a woman that he barely knows and never expresses any concern about.

He's like, okay, well, I'm just going to leave you here with a bottle of motor oil and I bet you walked like 20 miles before you considered drinking that. Now you just leave them and there's a scene later on that expresses that green was found with two bullet wounds to the back of the head. So he was like part of the line is that your guys know that you will have told the rest of the one to you. Yes, but also they have found him. But also I'm going to get revenge on you a woman, no, by making you drink some. Yeah. Yeah, I don't like it.

It's sort of, yeah, it's sort of portrayed and we'll come to this in the context of the last scene of the movie, which is Bond goes to Kazan in Russia because do you remember the Algerian love knot that Vespis was getting? Do. Yes. Because of her boyfriend who was getting blackmailed. As a sort of side note in this, earlier, M found out that like the boyfriend that she thought was dead was not in fact him at all and she had been catfished. I guess specifically she had been honey trapped. And so Bond waits for another couple

who are a Canadian spy and the very same guy, the guy who has catfished, Vespa and is now catfishing her into revealing information. Yeah, because Bond waits in there flat and then has them at gunpoint and he says, you're Canadian intelligence, you must be pretty high up. You're one of the two Michaels. Yeah, you're Michael. And this man is going to be quote unquote kidnapped and you're going to be forced to betray Canadian intelligence in order to save his life, but it's all a lie. So you should go now and she kind of looks so heartbroken, I guess, having just

said, thank you and leaves. And like great performance from that woman. Stan, I catered. He points at her, like love, not necklace. And he's like, it's a nice necklace. Do you get you that? Friend of mine had that. And like holds up vestibus. And I did an identical necklace. Yeah. sells her on it. She goes up and goes, thank you. And leaves, which is great performance in her. Like, one of the end. Stan a case that she's really good.

She was even good in Castle, which is a dog shit show, but she carries that show. Anyway, yeah. So we are then led to believe that Bond is going to kill this guy. And because we've seen him torture Dominic Green,

you are kind of expecting like, ah, right, just fury, he's going to go like Liam Neeson on this guy, he's going to like eat his heart, he's going to like break his mouth, he's going to do the case, he's going to do Kaufman shit to him. It's going to get revenge for Mitchell. He's going to explore his like urethra chakra with this one. The guy, the guy goes just looks at him and the only thing he says and that's the one is just make it quick. And then it cuts to outside and bond leaves and it's like, is he still alive and bond goes, yes. And that's, you're left to sort of wonder what has happened in there. You can sort of put it together from context clues, but it's better to not.

Yeah, and you kind of get the sense that like this is bond the closest you get to like bond letting go and he does literally let go of the fucking Algerian love not necklace just in case you were you know unclear on the symbolism there. Where he is like he is still motivated by ducy but he has now sort of had that renewed but you also get the sense that he's kind of like worked out his frustrations on green, which is, yeah, I don't know. Men will literally abandon a super villain in the desert with a kind of virtual rather than go to therapy. Absolutely.

Well, then again, consider what a fucking bad therapist the girl in the side and die is. Oh, that's what a serop is like in the side and dies, yeah. That's what a therapy is like in the bond universe. Or the therapist that he talks to in fucking Skyfall. Yeah, no, yeah. Or is that too? Therapy is a dead end for bond.

No, he can only do torture. Yeah, I mean, yeah, yeah, same. But then we get the gun barrel opening and my note said, this is the moment he truly became James Bonno. That's right. That's right. And I never flagged it up about five times through my notes. I wrote down, this guy can't even get a quantum of solace. I'm just like, this is a terrible bit.

I'm not going to do it. Well, like what what has happened here essentially is that Bond has filled the void that Vespa created with England, something which will cause him no problem in future movies. And that's a that I don't know. I think I think I said earlier, it's a movie about like trying to escape nihilism that doesn't escape its own But in this case like that that's that's the meaning that he finds that's his fucking quantum of solace or whatever And now we are prepared to go into some much worse movies But James I need you so just avoid

Steps off the edge of a cliff. Yeah But James I need you to pay Charles' support. Just goodbye. I'm immediately open to SS strike on my location now. Yeah. All right. All right. So we have a science based system on this podcast.

I like the title of this video. We call it the schium system for SMAM cultural insensitivity, now to intelligence, unprovoked violence and misogyny. Now this movie, how SMAMI would you say that it is? Because I don't think it's zero. I just think it gets away with it better. I think it's slightly, I mean, is it the same if the smarmer's good? I think so. I think like, because like all of the smar

when it is charming, like the, you know, where teachers on sabbatical who have won the lottery, like it's charming in a, oh, you fucking jammie bastard sort of way. I think that counts. So it's my understanding. Does it get points off for being sincere at times? We have done that before.

That's true. That's true. We pitch this at maybe like a three? I would say three and less were doing points off of sincerity. Because I think this thing has more sincere moments than any bit of the franchise before. I could do two then, I suppose.

Yeah, okay. I'd like to then, I suppose. Yeah, okay. I like it too. Two, two, two. All right, makes sense to me. Cultural insensitive. Well, Bueno Excellente. Well, it's not worse that's been, but. Yeah, it doesn't, it doesn't do hazy any justice either.

A lot of like, I mean, it could have been worse. Like, there's been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse.

I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse.

I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. I could have been worse. Like moral relic of this here, we went into this knowing that this might happen to us. Yeah, this isn't directive. We have final. You know, well, it's not as racist as the other bonds, doesn't matter. I think this could go to like a, I don't know. I'm inclined to say two again.

It's not that. I guess you can talk me down to it too. Yeah. Sure. I'm willing to. Largely, I'm a little bit invested in making this the best of the Greg movies, because I believe that it is. Hmm. I can't remember what we know.

We know this in the way out. This is the quality of the movie does not bear any resemblance to the scum system. Yes. Absolutely. I think of you to a kill, which is the best movie of all time. I'm persistent. I find the computer indispensable. I'm really violent. I'm really violent. find the computer indispensable. I'm provoked by that.

I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that.

I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. I'm provoked by that. excusing the unprovoked violence for being on the orders of the government, which defeats the point of the system entirely. When I kill, it's only explicit orders of my government. So this like kill are themselves killers. I hate that I have an encyclopedic knowledge of James Bond lines now. It becomes harder and harder for me to be like, I know, don't worry, I hate James Bond. I've just watched every movie, I have 100% encyclopedia knowledge. I have recordings of several of the best lines.

I think it picks up a couple of points for leaving Dominic Green in the desert, I think. Yeah, I would go so long. I would go so long. Really? Yes. Much of the rest of it is like fights to the death. I think that's too high.

No, because you can't bring me down love and success. No, I don't think so, you can't bring me down love Way that you like you know watch as the guy bleed out the way that he kills dominant grain That was an unprovoked that was a fight to the death you can't tighten with a knife I suppose just because it's like realistically acknowledging the consequences of the violence doesn't make it unprovoked Sick it's not reveling it same but at same time, he's been specifically asked not to. His boss is disappointed when he does it. It's implied that he's going off-piece to do additional violence that isn't particularly necessary. You didn't have to kill this guy. You can disarm him. I know you can fucking grapple a guy. Yeah, well, like, in a way, he like man handles, he man handles He man handles

Fucking Camille and the boat chasing he doesn't kill her by accident. I think he's making the choice to kill Yeah, absolutely okay Six the six Okay, six all right. I'm out of it. I was gonna go for another two, but all right, what's no ridiculous? I think the only unprovoked violence is what he does to green and the rest is arguably provoked. But misogyny. Um, afraid it's going to be quite high.

It's yeah, yeah, it is. Uh, I, I, I, I, P for fields like, yeah, and a great victim, by the fucking movie. Yeah, and then making it entirely about him, uh, also, yeah, very true. Also the rape, which is, to me, reflects a lack of confidence in your own screenwriting to be like this guy who we've explicitly said is a rapist. Using another character's interior sort of motivations, we now have to make that explicit,

because he just does that against all reason or self-preservation. The character of a whom that they use to be the right victim in that scene as well is just dispatched, like disappears from the movie. She walks out into a burning hotel and they're like, that's the end of that chapter, closes the book. Like it's, it woman is a prop again. Yeah, express for this, this man is evil.

Baseline of five, do you want to go higher? I'd say, I would be invincible for five, I think. Only because I don't think it reaches the heady, It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy.

It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy.

It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. It's not that easy. Five. That gives it a total score of 15, which is pretty good, actually, as far as funds go. I can't remember what we gave because we saw it last time because I wrote it down elsewhere, but...

I put it on the wiki, which we definitely should have. Yeah, I do. It's pretty lovely as far as they go. I do need to get all this data at the end. I'll start doing some SPSS statistics and we can find the answer bottom of this doing Bondometrics are we Award two little decorations on this podcast. We award the well three, but I don't think the Calvin stars relevant here We have the good micross for the least appreciated good character and we have the

for the least appreciated good character and we have the Cronstein Rosette for the most appreciated evil character. Well, they're showing us that the initial people are being armed. Yes, easy. Mitchell for the Kaufman fields for the good night. Not the Kaufman of the Cronstein. The Cronstein, yes, right.

Yeah, I think we've got it with you. I agree with that, yeah. Mitchell and Fields, yeah. Mitchell and Fields. Because the thing about Fields, like M has a line, but it's just like, why? And Bond's just like, well, you know, I had to ask you.

No, she said, no, no, no, no, why her? She was a desk jockey, man. I just sent her out to turn you away at the airport. How is she dead? Yeah, he's like, well, I had an erection. The low five Bond theme started playing. What I meant to not both. Yeah, like she was like, there was pussy there an erection. The low five-bond theme started playing. What do I meant? And not both.

She was like, there was pussy there. It wasn't made of sand. Absolutely. Well, this has been the best of the Craig ears. And after this, Daniel Craig's. It was the best of Craig's. That's true. That's true.

And after this Craig starts hating Bond as well, he might and as we all did, too. Sorry, that's my note to say that the recording Hacing Bond as well he might and as we all did too Sorry, that's my note to say that the recording has now been going on for the length of the movie quantum of solace Equal time time to wrap it up. Thank you for joining us. I have been Alice called walk Kelly. I have been joined Yes, this has been quite a few miss S have been to Moose Cirlease. I have been to Alice Corwell Kelly. I have been joined by Devon and Abigail Thorne. And we will be returning for what is the next one? It's Skyfall. Skyfall, baby. Skyfall everyone says is the best craig. I'm excited to disagree. Whether that will be in, well exactly when that will, is not sure because I have to go and do

something next week. You have to go and do some normal, normal thing. Some normal things. We gave you corn to have solace with no fake outs because, um, yeah, you just have to go and do a thing that might make it difficult to record. Absolutely. Absolutely. So, so. Yes, Alice, yeah, Abigail has to go topple another South American. have a girl have to go topple another South American. Thank you for listening to yet another episode of Kill James Bond. It's probably the kindest we've been to a movie since license to kill. And this is an actual Bond movie, that one was just sort of a movie starring a guy called James Bond.

Kill James Bond will return in two weeks time for Skyfall, maybe, unless something comes up. But if that is simply too long for you to wait and you have an interest in becoming parasocially friends with us, you can head on over to patreon.com, such Kill James Bond or One Word. We're next week, we're going to be uploading Q&A 4, where we laughed harder than we have in any other episode we've ever recorded. Even more so than the previous bonus episode's bike, it's 3D, starring Demi Ladner and Tom Walker, an episode in which I got this clip of Abby.

No, I'm gonna fucking kill that kind. Which is one of my favorite clips of her I've ever heard in my fucking life. Anyway, I've got a lot of fucking names to get through, so let's just kinda get on with this. 15 pounds and above patrons, Forks Winchester, Paint Macala, Jack Holmes, Georgia Ro-Hack, Thomas Oberhart, British Teradactyl, Sol, Nikki, Phil West Music, Carolyn Tankersley, Beno Rice, Rain,

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