Kill James Bond! - S4E14: KJB Q&A #11

Episode Date: May 15, 2025

It's another peek behind the curtain as we answer YOUR questions for the 11th time. This week: What are our escape plans from TERF Island? What is KJB's dream Heist Roster? Can Pepsi think of a good new flavour? And we finally, finally open up about our Tesco Meal Deal go-tos. You don't want to miss it. You can read Rebecca Wilks' article, '"They’re just waiting for her to die": How austerity turns mental health patients into prisoners' Here! ----- FREE PALESTINE Hey, Devon here. As you well know I've been working with a few gazan families to raise money for their daily living costs in the genocide. Thanks to your incredible generosity, we've been able to raise the money to register Ahmed and his family for evacuation from Gaza. I truly, truly cannot thank you enough. I hope the wait is short and I'm able to tell you that he's safe in Egypt very soon.  Here are three more campaigns from trusted sources. Each of these are for a family that need your help. If you're able to help them out at all, it would mean the world. https://chuffed.org/project/121901-help-mahers-family-with-medical-costs https://chuffed.org/project/128691-help-my-family-evacuate-gaza-war-zone https://chuffed.org/project/130802-help-rashas-family-in-gaza-evacuate-and-live ----- Remember to check out our reasonably-priced Patreon for our entire backlog of bonus episodes! ----- WEB DESIGN ALERT Tom Allen is a friend of the show (and the designer behind our website). If you need web design help, reach out to him here:  https://www.tomallen.media/ Kill James Bond is hosted by November Kelly, Abigail Thorn, and Devon. You can find us at https://killjamesbond.com 

INTRO Hello and welcome to another episode of Kill James Bond. I am November Kelly, joined as always by my friends Abigail, Thorne and Devon. Hello. Hello! Hello! It's a Q&A again! You have Qs, we will A them, I will do this joke every time we do a Q&A. And the reason why we're doing this is because, well, we felt like giving ourselves a bit

of a- Yeah, I was gonna say we should pull the curtain back. This is a pulling the curtain back ass episode, so. We're doing this because we're banking episodes before November, I was gonna say goes off, but unfortunately it's the fascist nature of the United States, you are no longer going. No. But begins the Will There's Your Problem tour. Yes.

Yes. But there's gonna be a shitload of work in the early hours of the morning for our dear friends. It's interesting, I'm working a night shift for a week, functionally, and what that amounts to is appearing on Broadway from home. Which sucks, I'm so sorry, like, I would fucking hate this so much. It's okay, I mean, I'm sad too, and you know, obviously I'm sort of like sad for people who wanted to come out and see me as well, I just, it's so unpredictable with the border right now, and so I'm just

stuck in this position where it's safer for me to do it this way, but so that is gonna like absolutely fuck my ability to think about movies at all. Yes. No, it's gonna be a big thing for you. You're gonna be on Broadway though, that's cool. That's what counts. Yes, Sonny Hall. You're gonna be on Broadway more than I've ever been. First. No, it's going to be a big thing for you. You're going to be on Broadway though, that's cool. Yes, Sonny Hall. You're going to be on Broadway more than I've ever been.

First of all, it's on Broadway. I had no idea until they told me the venues, but yeah. So we're doing, oh god, five shows, something like, and it's going to be a good time. So I think probably too late to get tickets unless... I believe that this episode will come out on... hang on. First is gonna be Transporter 2, then the 8th for Conclave, and then, yeah, no. We're long gone, it'll come out on the 15th of May, probably.

I hope you all enjoyed my onstage meltdown, or whatever else happened. It will be post tour that this drops, and we've recorded it pre. We actually did get a bunch of questions that were just like, do you ever consider doing a Canadian live show? ALICE I would love to. I would be thrilled, genuinely. RILEY We'd need a visa for that too, wouldn't we? ALICE Yes. RILEY Yeah, we would, but fortunately Canada, at

the moment, has the accolade of not being part of America. ALICE And it would of course be a woke visa or visaworkism, which would allow us to be the genders that we are. Visaworkism. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. They probably wouldn't put us into any rooms or anything. Yeah.

So we decided to do a Q&A. Yeah. We used to do this every five bonus episodes, if you cast your mind back to 2021. Did we really? Wow. This was every 10 episodes we would do. Yeah, genuinely. During our first season, our last one was in fact just before the Johnny English live shows. Okay, perfect. Good time to be doing one again. So it's about once a year.

Hit me with it, question master. Let's just start out, let's pull the curtain back, start out Velklasko. What are we reading right now? What are we watching? What are we listening to? I just finished the other day Moby Dick by Herman Melville. I have been reading the novel and watching every adaptation of Moby Dick that I can get my hands on. Spoilers, my next bonus pick is the 1956 adaptation of Moby Dick because I'm playing a big role this summer for which it is relevant as part of my research. So I've just finished reading that and I've also started reading a manga series.

Nerd-a-land. A manga? Is that allowed? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Manga series. I blame Morgana Ignis. I'm reading a manga series called Eden. It's an endless world, which is very difficult to get in English because it had a very limited run in English. I've

managed to get the first six books. If anyone knows where to get books, six through 12, let me know. So I've read book one of that. So far there's a character who has the body of a prepubescent girl, but the mind of a 40 year old woman. And I'm like, not mad about that. But the rest of it's really good cyborgs and shit, I like it. Nice, nice. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fantastic. Dev, do you want to go first, or shall I? Yeah, yeah.

I've been trying to read a lot recently. I feel like I've lost a lot of attention span from the phone, so I desperately, desperately need to get a brain back in my head. So I've been reading a bunch of books. I've read How the Railways Will Fix the Future by a friend of a show, Gareth Dennis, which is fucking fantastic, and you should pick that up. I just finished A Spectre Haunting, which is China Mayville's companion for the Communist Manifesto, like, explainer.

What have I been watching recently? You might need to fill in for me while I think about what I've seen. Sure, sure. I'll fill in for you. So, in terms of reading right now, aside from also doing the live shows, I'm working on my dissertation. So, all the reading I'm doing is focused on that. So, primarily, I'm reading a lot of Judith Butler.

I'm reading a lot of criminology and a lot of sort of like zemiology around that. What's zemiology? Zemiology is the Woker criminology, because criminology is an inherently kind of like imperialist like disciplining science, right? And so zemiology is a, it would be like a study of harm, right? And so the kind of big debate in the field right now is whether or not like it's still even like possible or desirable to still do criminology. But so my dissertation is on trans feminine prisoners as a moral panic. And moral panic is a kind of like term of art in the social

sciences. So I'm using Stan Cohen's Folk Devils and Moral Panics for that. Dan, could you send me a zemiology reading this? Yeah! Because this could be a good philosophy. Yeah, absolutely, I will do. It's really fascinating. In terms of movies that I've seen recently, I'd say one of the best movies I've seen recently had a huge, huge impact on me, was I saw Capote, the Truman Capote biopic with Philip Seymour Hoffman.

Which is just straightforwardly, it's just great. Absolutely deserved every accolade he got for that performance. And I mean, really sort of paints him as this kind of monster in a lot of ways. It's really really fascinating, it's certainly not flattering in a lot of ways. It's really really fascinating, it's certainly not like, sort of like, flattering in a lot of ways. I also recently saw Operation Avalanche, which I don't want to talk too much about because it's better if you go in knowing as little as possible, but it's a great little like, indie, sort of like, partially found footage, partially edited movie, that has so much to say about hoaxes, right?

Mm. I fucking love found footage movies, I've really taken off with found footage movies recently, I don't know why. It's such an interesting genre to explore. I've watched every David Lynch film since he died, I haven't watched any beforehand, and it was just the push I needed to just crack into them, and they are fan-fucking-tastic. ALICE I've been saving them. I've been putting it off and putting it off until I can really

give it 100%, you know? RILEY I just, yeah, Blue Velvet, fantastic, Mulholland Drive, fan-fucking-tastic. I haven't gotten around to watching The Dune, or Inland Empire yet, but I've seen Lost Highway as well, Wild at Heart. All beautiful, beautiful films. Can I confess to an absolute lapse in my reading? I've never seen a David Lynch film. I don't think I have either. Well, this was me prior to his passing, yeah. I hadn't either. Yeah, I just took the push

and was like, fuck it, let's go. I've been rewatching movies that I've heard are good, but are like classics. I watched 2001 for the first time recently. Fantastic fucking movie. Yep. No surprise there. Anything else? I watched Battle at Lake Chang'an recently. It's fine. It's fine. It's more of a war movie. It's just a It's more of a war movie. It's just a war movie where everyone's talking Chinese, unfortunately. I thought it was gonna be a lot more than that, but- I think a lot of the Wolf Warrior stuff kind of is, you know, like- Yeah.

It's a shame. It happens. I think... yeah, anything else lads? Nope. That's it. S-fan-a-tastic. Let's stick with movies then. John, no sir, asks, what bonus have you most regretted picking? Now I got, I got a couple, I got some that I regret because they weren't particularly good movies, like Flushed Away was dogshit. I thought it was better. We got so much from Flushed Away, we got Careful Whitey from Flushed Away was dogshit. I thought it was better. ALICE We got so much from Flushed Away, we got

Careful Whitey from Flushed Away? RILEY We did get Careful Whitey, I remember. SONIA I'm scrolling back through the list now to try and follow it, because there's definitely one where I was like, I'm really sorry I made us watch this, it sucked. I don't know if that was a while ago, I don't remember what it was. RILEY There's definitely one that I feel like that. There's the one that I had to argue with the two of you for the entire movie about, which

was, um, scruising. But I don't regret that pick, because I enjoyed the argument. I did too. Yeah. I'm struggling to think here. I think I stand by everything that we've, everything that I've picked, certainly. Like, yeah, no, listen, I've never made a mistake, I love the movies, I pick movies that I like, and that I want to talk about with my friends and I have never once regretted that. It's pretty good, isn't it? Just talking about it with the movies. I pick movies that I like and that I want to talk about with my friends and I have never once regretted that. It's pretty good, isn't it? Just talking about it with the boys. It's a good job.

Yeah, I mean, I'm struggling to think of anything that I'm struggling- I'm looking at the list here and like I've consistently picked some pretty banger ones like Breach. Remember Breach? Shoot him up? I remember Breach. He's the best computer guy we've got. He's also a convicted sex offender. Yeah, I remember Breach. The Tuxedo? Ooh, that was a bad movie. Tuxedo maybe. I think the worst movie to like, the worst experience I had watching a movie that's a

bonus is probably still Beowulf maybe? Oh, really? Worse than Stormbreaker? No! Stormbreaker was pretty bad. Stormbreaker was... oh, that was dire. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stormbreaker was so bad I that was dire. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stormbreaker was so bad, I was gone for half the episode. No, I fucking loved, I love Bear Wolf.

We got such a good episode out of that one. Yeah. Grantal mode? I don't think I can think of anything that we've watched, that I've picked, because I know I take some swings sometimes. I'm the one that likes to bring us a children's movie every so often. Just to see. But no, it's a- I regret watching Stormbreaker just because I regret spending some of my holiday watching that, so that I could do it on the podcast.

Working holidays are rough, yeah. I regret watching, I dunno, Sex and the City 2. I do regret that. It was a good episode, but I do regret watching that. I'm glad we had Maddie on for that, she really got us- Winter Kills was an unpleasant movie. Oh yeah, we really thought Winter Kills was gonna be on a theme, and it just wasn't. It's weird, yeah. Pretty funny. Winter Kills.

I had fun with My Little Pony. I did too, yeah, for a couple of years. What's with Mia Mulder? Well, I love Mia. Yeah. No, I stand by all of this shit, actually. Yeah, we for a couple of years. What's in me, Amalda? Well, I love me. Yeah. No, I stand by all of this shit, actually. Yeah, we make a quality product here. Even a bad movie I've had a good discussion with my friends about.

No shit leaves the shop. We have done quality podcasts that I'm proud to put my name on. Yeah. It's like that tweet I saw, I don't remember who tweeted it, or even indeed the words of it, but it was something akin to, I keep thinking the movies I've watched at the cinema are good, but actually what's happened is I've had a big soda and sat down for a while. And it's kind of like that, I'm enjoying talking about it with my friends more than. Yeah, I like talking to my friends and having a cup of tea.

Is it not enough to see a beautiful face huge? It's so good, it's more than enough to see a beautiful face, huge. It's so good. It's more than enough to me. Every time I go to the cinema, I just get the yearning now. Whenever the lights go down, I'm just like, ah, I wanna be in movies. Movies and TV. Movies are good.

Movies are so fucking good. I'm in a movie. I've been in one feature film that has not yet come out. And I'm like, bring out the fucking movie. Post the movie. Post the movie. Show me the movie! Post the movie! Show me the movie! Mia! Put the movie out!

Come on! Come on I'm writing a movie too at the moment I'm really I'm really enjoying I'm writing a feature so second one I've written I wrote a feature last year just to see if I could it was garbage it's never gonna see the light of day but like I finished it that's what I wanted to do this year I'm writing one that's actually good and I'm like I think this has a recent chance of being made because you could, you could definitely make it for less than $10 million. You could probably make it for less than five. And that is like nothing in movie terms. And I'm like, Ooh,

like I've got a role in mind for me. I've got someone in mind for the lead. I'm like, ah, let me make this movie. Let me make it, baby. It's good. It's good. I'm cooking. I'm enjoying writing it too. I mean, David Alexander asks us, if you were all in a situation where you could conveniently watch movies for the show in person together, would you? I kind of think not, actually. I like, maybe it's just because I saw Conclave most recently, but I like sequestering myself and I like coming back and comparing notes after the fact. Yeah. So I might take advantage of it sometimes, but then sometimes Iestering myself and I like coming back and comparing notes after the fact.

Yeah. So I might take advantage of it sometimes, but then sometimes I might be like, no, I'm gonna watch Saw and Mo. I feel like we kind of have too much agreement to do that, because if we watch it together we might all notice different things, but if we're all commenting on it together then we're just kind of... You get the one homogenized perspective at the end of it, I think, maybe. If we were watching it together, it'd be too tempting to riff on it, and then we'd start

to develop... Also, the jokes on the podcast would be less spontaneous, because we'd be doing them in the theater and trying to remember them later. And I mean, clearly, our comedy owes a lot to riff tracks or MST3K in that sense, but I think it's... Maybe there are TV's like, riff tracks or like, MST3K in that sense, but like, I think it's distinctive from that, partially because we do, like, watch it separately and then do this kind of like, discussion, you know? Yeah, I've never watched a movie with you, Nova, which is fascinating to think of, but I watched one, I watched A Bond With You, Abi, after Puddy was few to a kill we watched together. Which was, you know, it was pretty

good. I don't think it affected the episode too badly, but I also, I really do like the fact that we kind of don't discuss the movies before we're on mic. Like, we even shut down the group chat if we're getting too into discussing it before the episode. I have a crucial fact here, which is that I am very annoying to watch movies with, because Like, we even shut down the group chat if we're getting too into discussing it before the episode. Yeah, we do. I have a crucial fact here, which is that I am very annoying to watch movies with, because I am the kind of person who is like, I will watch the movie like in Vives A Vie, right? I'm gonna be watching this, I'm gonna be crying. Total silence on pain of death, right?

No, I will not pause it and explain it to you or tell you who that guy is. Watch, the movie is the talking. Yeah. I'm a tyrant. I'm a tyrant. It's terrible. I'm a bad person, but that's how I watch movies. Like- I couldn't go either way. It depends on the movie. Like sometimes I'm like an instant death if you say a word, but sometimes I do appreciate going to the cinema with my mates and like doing the riff tracks thing. I remember I went to see Beetlejuice 2 in California with the creators and some of the cast of hell of a boss. And that was a fucking great time because we were all just like chatting along with the movie that was in 4D too. So we were on like a roller coaster while we watched it.

It's really, really funny. It's funnier to be like this, the worse the movie is. Like if I'm long on Beowulf and I'm like you opening a pack of crisps, you may as well be like riding a horse around the room. Like I... Yeah, Grendel is in the middle of screaming loud of an Iron Man, you're sat back like mad men in the cinema. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Fingers tented. That's unbelievable. Amazing. I have legitimately done that, with steepling fingers.

What? Tweet a bunch of times because of movies for this. No, me too. Every time you two reference tweets now, I'm just like, what the fuck is... I'm not on Twitter anymore, so I've never seen a tweet... What is a tweet referencing a skeet for you? I tried Blue Sky, it's Cardinal Bellini hours over there, it's too limp. I'm honestly liking Blue Sky more and more, and I like it because of the reasons why everyone

hates it. It's because they have somehow, and I don't know how they did it, they've somehow released a captive population of 2016-era liberals onto that platform, and they're just, they're like babes fresh out the womb. It's crazy. You're posting like a standard take, right? Like a normal take, like we should be killing X and Y people. Yeah, of course. And like, they'll be like, that's crazy. I did this today. I did this today.

I quoted Marx and I said, when our turn comes, we will make no excuses for the terror. And like, I would have thought to my audience that's understood that that is a, A, a quote from Marx and B, a kind of like colorful and somewhat poetic exaggeration. And then somebody was like, that's terrible. You can't do that.

And I'm like, I'm gonna have to delete this, aren't I? Because you think I'm really being serious. Yeah, because like in practical terms, obviously we would make a couple of excuses for the terror. We'd be like, oh, sorry about this terror, but you know how it is. I am preparing as we speak to excuse the terror. Some of the excuses would be, I'm tired. I'm just like, oh, sorry, can I just squeeze past you?

Sorry, sorry, shoot you in the back of the head. Sorry, sorry. You know what? This is why we never had a revolution in England, like a proper Marxist one. Too embarrassed. I'm gonna stick with the sort of procedural questions for a minute or two here. I've got three headings which are procedural, heists, and parasocial. So I'm gonna stick with procedural for a minute.

Okay, great. Auro asks, now that you've used the scum system for a couple of years, are you all perfectly satisfied with it? Or if you were to start over, would you tweak it a little? It's perfect. I'm a fundamentalist. Great. Good results. Consistent results. Nailed it first time. My biggest regret is we never found a way to use the girth system, because the girth system is actually good. It just... It is.

Like, respecting the troops. Is it good, or is respecting the troops just a funny joke to put in R&T? I mean, I think both, probably. Because how concerned is the movie about glory? It's still... it's a meaningful question to ask. Yeah. I think, generally, if there is something that isn't covered properly by Scum, we find a way to, like, elucidate that in the text of the episode, you know?

Yes. Yeah, we do talk about it for, like, upate that in the text of the episode, you know? Yes. Yeah, we do talk about it for like, up to two hours before we do the numbers. I'm sorry, there's a lot of movie and conflict. Hey, I want to! That's fine. The more podcasts we put out the better, I think. Yeah, no, I'm fucking satisfied. Yeah, it's great, it's great.

Big thumbs up. Scum nailed it. Many of these questions, this is like Prime Minister's questions, because all the questions are people who already support us standing up and being like, Hey, is it true that you're doing great? And we go, and we go, yes. Thank you for asking. If it was like prime minister's questions, we'd give pretty much the same answer to every single question that would always be bullshit. Yeah, Mikey. It's fine. It, vilani99 asks, if you had to go Eggers mode and do a movie, any genre, whatever, in any

historical time or place, and have it be unflinchingly historically accurate to that time and place? ALICE I don't want to. RILEY Where are we setting it? ALICE I don't want to. RILEY This is a really good question. Thank you for asking this. ALICE I'm actively hostile to the question. I read an interview with Tarkovsky, head head of Andre Rublev, where he's specifically against

historical accuracy as a kind of artistic trap, where it's like, no, it distracts you from anything that you might possibly want to say about it by being like, oh, what kind of belt buckles did Vikings wear? Who cares? Nobody pumps the tires on the fucking Batmobile, it's a fictional device. That is certainly true. In fact, I know exactly what movie it would be as well. In fact, I have a specific movie in mind,

and I'm probably allowed to say it too. My answer would be 2015 USA, because I want my dear friend Mia to be able to make her movie When I Tell You, which is about... It's a period piece set in 2015. It's about a trans woman who goes back in time to 2015, like, from now to 2015,

to say, like, to tell her past self, like, look, shit's about to get fucked. You need to get this stuff sorted right now. And it becomes this... It becomes this very... It's not just about trans stuff. In fact, it's barely about that. It becomes this very fucking human story about regret and having to accept your own mistakes

and the mistakes of the people you love. Because it's like, spoilers, fucks up trying to change everything. So I would specifically make that movie, which I got, I hope does get made at some point. And not only because Mia's attached me to play the lead. Also mutuals with Mia and think that that movie should be fucking made.

ASAP, it's kind of like, like's kind of like Uncut Gems, right? It was a 2019 movie that was a 2012 period piece. I think I would do something similar to that. Yeah, because there's nothing so foreign as the recent past. I want a movie that is unflinchingly set during the pandemic, and wants to fucking talk about the pandemic, because nobody wants to talk about the fucking pandemic. Everyone wants to pretend the pandemic either didn't happen or finished like completely washed, but so much occurred and there's so much in there that is, I think, when the book is written about this period of history, it will start with 2019 and then it will go into the pandemic and then from there we see what happens. It's

such a crucial year of our lives that we've just, certainly in Britain, are like, bid to forget. Because it's a kind of like mass insaneing event, a mass maddening. So many people just like went bananas. Except for like essential workers. Everyone went on the computer non-stop for a full year, and it killed the human race with fucked actually. Yeah, that's true. It was a shame.

It was also a mass egg cracking event for a lot of trans people, which is very interesting too. Well, actually, I mean, I might as well swing into this for one of the parasocial questions. Crane, hello Crane, friend of the show, asks, how did each of our eggs crack? AAAAAAAAHHHHHH. Let me think about how to tell this story without naming some of the principal people involved.

Give me a minute here to try and think about it. I saw a lot of paintings of dark haired women, and if you do that too much it really fucks you up. Oh god. Real. Yeah. If you remember the last time we did this, I think, it probably was the last time we did this, I mentioned the specific painting of...

Oh you did? Yeah! Fuck! I remember! Lady Agni of Loch Nol, in the National Gallery in Edinburgh. I can see it in my head, but I don't remember the name. So, I mean, that was part of it. I mean, I guess also just like, I had a long period of just confused feelings of just like,

why do I feel this yearning every time I see a woman? And I was at night school, four law school for it at the time, and I finally just ended up being like, yeah, okay, fuck it, this is just like, this is the only way this is gonna go, right? It's just, the only thing I'm negotiating on is the timeline here, you know? Yeah, yeah. And... Yeah!

I mean, I also had that long, long period of confusion and doubt and yearning. I actually knew trans people and even dated trans people during that period of time. You're such a good ally. Yeah, that's what I said to myself too. Why do I care about this so much? Yeah, that's what I said to myself. I was just like, I guess I just know a lot about this because, you know, I just know a lot of people and care about it. And then I guess the yearning started to become more painful.

I was just like, there's something that isn't right. And then I kind of started, without getting too specific, began like acting up in my life, indulging in some unhealthy habits, uh, suddenly like taking, undertaking quite erratic behavior, like suddenly going out clubbing at like 3 a.m. I just wake up in the night and go to the club and I'll be like, what the fuck am I doing? I never do this.

And then none of the people in my life really knew the signs. Um, one person did say to me like, have you been questioning your gender lately? And I was like, well, what do you mean by questioning? And then I was like, oh shit, that's not really very cisgender answer. Yeah. Cis guy would say no. And then yeah, no. And then, yeah, yeah, yeah, right. What do you mean by that? At that point I said, well, okay, I'm going to, being somebody who's trained in science A levels, I was like, okay, hypothesis, I'm a transgender woman, let us examine the evidence here and began like conducting experiments and boiling ermine flasks in my lab and like, you know, researching stuff, looking stuff up about like what trans women experienced.

And at that point, I started to realize, oh, shit, like, I resonate with a lot of that. And then some of my experiments returned certain kinds of results where I was like, oh, damn, okay, I really enjoy this. This makes me feel good. Or alternatively, like, why am I suddenly crying? Um, and for instance, I was like, I can just shave my arms, right? I'm allowed to do that. Like, you can just do that. Maybe I'm a swimmer. No one knows. Shave my arms, burst into tears.

And I was like, that's weird. Why am I doing that? That's an odd response to that. Yeah. And then there was a point, I was still denying it. I was like, I think there must be something wrong with me. Because I was like, it can't be that I'm trans. Because if I was, I would know. And I remember very clearly thinking to myself, it would be ridiculous if I knew this many trans people had dated trans people, like knew so much about this and didn't know myself. I was like, it would be stupid if that was the case.

And I'm not gonna reveal what it was, but there was in fact, finally a moment of which the clouds parted and the fucking big hand came down and I was hit by lightning and I suddenly knew. And suddenly like two faces became a candlestick in my mind and I was like, whoa. And then, you know, I was lifted up into the sky in a big light and then descended as you know me now instantly. So yeah, that was it. There was, there was like a lot before that, there was a long, it was like a week long period where I was just clearly having some kind of crisis. I was like going to the gym three times a day and like staying up all night watching the color out of space and just like

anxious and weird and something was clearly brewing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if I have a specific moment that I remember. I mean, I was just, I was just on the computer a lot in like 2015. And these things simply happen. But I do remember two specific events that are extremely funny of my experience of trying to come out in the queerest fucking family in North Devon. I was right there. I was like, oh shit, I'm non-binary. I want to use they, them pronouns. I haven't thought of a new name yet. I was experimenting with a different one at the time. It was just like Danny or something like that. I've had a couple swing through my head

before I wanted to be Brooke briefly, but I don't like that. And I wrote the whole thing. I was ready to come out. And who fucking comes out first? But my sister comes out as fully transgender in the group chat. And I'm like, fuck, I have to wait at least a month now.

And you've pipped me. I was only gonna be like, oh, I've kinda got some gay gender shit going on, but she was like, no, no, no, fully I am a woman, I need you to start using woman shit for me. Damn, what's this? A couple of, so a couple of like, months later, right, I try to come out, I tell my Venn partner about it, and she goes, you know what, I'm not feeling that. And I go, that's fine.

Closet sounds great. So I get back into there for a couple of minutes. Shame. These things happen. They really do. Yeah, they do. They do. Again, every part of my life, painful or positive,

has led me to where I am right now. And I don't regret a second of it. I'm dating the love of my life. Everything is fantastic. But at the time, I was dating someone who would really have liked it if I'd stuck with being a cisgender straight man, and I just couldn't do it.

Mm-hmm. It happens. So eventually, that cracked. And I tried to talk to my mother about this. And what my mother has is a condition where she isn't on binary as well, but didn't fucking know it. So I'm trying to explain to her how I feel. And she's just there going, everyone feels like that.

Eventually, I get the name changed and the pronouns. They actually used Evan. And then she comes out to me and I'm so proud of her. And I love her with all of my heart. She's fantastic. If you're queer in North Devon, by the way, look for the Facebook group out in the country. My mother runs it. She puts on social events for queer people in North Devon and the surrounding area. I love her to pieces. I didn't get her on at some point. She's pretty good., fuck, was it an uphill struggle trying to be like, no, I am queer, I swear to God.

Everyone involved in this just refusing to let me. Yeah, well, honestly, once you come out to yourself, like, that's really only the beginning, because after that, there was a few months where I sort of had to do a lot of stuff on my own. But then I found YouTube, wonderful people, uh, who like became my best friends and like helped me prepare to come out publicly. Um, so yeah, then all, then you know, all kind of like administrative stuff has to happen and then if you want to do physical transition, then that's a whole fucking thing too.

So yeah, really coming out as just the beginning and then, and then also you come out and then you have to unlearn all of the harmful things that you have been taught about trans people, either from cis people or other trans people. So that's a fucking years long process too. So yeah, really coming out is only the beginning. Yeah, I do remember, I remember that group chat where we were trying to teach you how to be feminine, which is very funny, because I was the main makeup person there, and I just don't do that anymore. Yeah, you taught me how to contour and I still use those lessons! Thank you! I learned it from Nikki Tutorials on YouTube!

Hell yeah! Nikki! My girl! Community knowledge, baby! And I remember when you had to come out to TF, because you were showing up to do a TF recording with them. You had to let them know. Yeah, so...

Just, yeah. So... And of course those guys are like, crazy transphobic. So like, that was... RILEY No, they were really nice actually. It was pretty good. ALICE Yeah. RILEY Talk about a hostile audience. ALICE Don't tell Riley Quinn you're trans, photo

of you immediately pre-FFS. God, I hope he thinks that's funny. He's a different. I love Riley so much. Not to like sprue cover podcast, but I honestly, if you're like November's on the podcast, so like listen to that. If you don't listen to trash feature, you should. You absolutely should. Riley, I think is one of the few people that is actually paying attention to what is happening in the world right now. It is one of the few people that is actually paying attention to what is happening in the world right now. He's one of the few people that can actually tell you what is going on. Because everyone else has a vested interest in pretending that it isn't. He is also, contrary to what I just said as a joke, one of the short list of cis people

who get it. He is. He is. He's one of the staunchest allies that I know 100%. Yeah, no, I love that guy to pieces. Um, sure. Hoob asks, fuck, marry, kill. Kill James Bond season one, two and three.

What? What's season three? Obviously, I think- Kill James Bond season one. Yeah, Kill James Bond season one, I think marry. James Bond, season one, I think Mary. I think Kill season two, and I think fuck season three, if I'm honest. When did season three begin? That's robbery.

No, wait, I thought- Season four is robbery. I maintained this when I posted it. I'm confusing this. One is Bond, two is when we did the sort of American Psychosis tour. Oh. Which again, a thing I stole from Riley there. And three is Eurospy, four is Heiss. Ooh.

I marry the Eurospys, I kill James Bond, I fuck the American Psychosis. Absolutely. That's, yeah. I think I agree with you. Yeah, that's about where I am. Cause we have to kill James Bond, it's in the mission statement. Which is also the title. The Man From Uncle movies were like, a wild swing swing and I'm so glad that you took it as

well as they did. We're inflating the Man From Uncle movies like that clown that Napoleon Solo fucked in order to fuck it. Yes. We just love doing a series. We really love having a couple of movies to build rifts up over the course of them. There's a real structural problem that people keep pointing out to me, which is that we didn't finish our main course in that there's still British spy movies we've never done.

We haven't done Tinker Tailor, we haven't done like the fucking Ipkris file, there's others I'm sure, and my answer to that is I don't care, we'll get to them when we get to them. Yeah, the answer to that is there are three of them, I have them aside for fucking, for live shows alright? Hell yeah. If there are three movies in a series, the reason why we haven't done them is because I'm reserving them.

Ben asks... Oh, this is gonna be good. This was up top, I was gonna say, the obvious question, the answer to that one is, we don't know, we're not coping particularly well either. But Ben has asked does the KJB crew have an exit strategy for the ongoing V for vendettaification of the UK? It involves a lot of alliteration and some of it will not be public to you yet. Yeah, I, I, I do, whether my exit plan is any better, it makes me think. Yeah, no, America not good either, it turns out.

Yes. You're like, in the frying pan, being like, well at least I've still got my visa for the fire, you know? That's what the F means on that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I've wondered about this as well, and I think my answer is no, I'm staying here, because I am a coward, right? I am God's perfect coward, I would just as easily like, flee to somewhere, you know, probably somewhere English speaking, I could, you know,

go to Ireland relatively easily and become increasingly annoying over there, or I could go to like, you know, fucking Canada, Australia, New Zealand, right? That would all be fine, but for the fact that my beloved wife is not a coward, and is actually quite brave, and is therefore like, no, fuck this, I don't wanna move just because someone wants to tell me what bathroom to piss in, right? Yes. And so, that is enough for me. That is sufficient convincing and bolstering to be like, nope, I guess I'm just here.

Nathanael According to the European Court of Human Rights, it's neither, which is fascinating. SXXSW Yeah, strange. That was just the Supreme Court, we hope that the European Court of Human Rights is gonna be pro-, pro-trans. If you want to infiltrate some chasers into Strasbourg, you know, that would be helpful. Well, to answer this quite seriously, like, I've been doing a lot of work in my life lately of trying to let go of pride. Because, not in the kind of queer sense, but in the kind of internal sense, because my own pride has been hurting me lately. And, and so I read crime and punishment earlier

this year. And there's a moment in that where the protagonist Raskolnikov, who's committed a terrible crime, has the opportunity to flee to Russia, uh, to flee to America rather. And the inspector, a police inspector who's chasing him comes to him and says like, well, I'm going to give you 24 hours. You could flee, but I know you're not going to because you're too proud. And Raskolnikov runs the numbers in his head and thinks like, I could flee to America and escape punishment, but he's too proud because he's like, if I had to, if I fled, I'd have to give up all my stuff and I don't really have any stuff, but it's my filthy hovel, you know, and I'd have to sleep on people's couches and I'd

have to ask for help. I don't need help from anybody. I'm fucking Raskolnikov. I'm going to stay and I'm going to fight because I'm so fucking proud. And I don't think I did anything wrong. No one fucking liked that old bat anyway. And it was good that I did it. And he stays because he's too proud and he goes to a fucking Gulag. He goes to fucking jail because he's too proud to run. And I'm like, yeah, maybe I shouldn't be too proud to run.

I completely get that. I really do. I am gonna stay, no matter what. This is my fucking country, and they're not gonna tell me that I'm not welcome here. Yeah, this is our hovel. Look, it's a bad country, it's done awful things to the world over the course of its life. We are probably, like, we're not the Great Satan, thank you to the United States, but we're fucking small Satan's at the very least. But I, there are people here that deserve so much better than what they are being offered. And there's so many people here that I would, I will stay and I will fight for and I will defend.

I think as I was going to, I was going to leave anyway, even if it wasn't bad. I was already making moves to leave. So it's just about whether that's still possible because the things that I want can't be obtained in this country. That's reasonable. That's totally reasonable. Yeah. I just, ever since I got involved with like, I don't know, tenant organizing and things

like that, like I have friends who are worse off than me here, I have friends who won't be able to leave, even if it gets badly, and I'm not gonna leave them. ALICE Yeah, so do I. JUSTIN I won't do it. So, my blood isn't more precious than theirs, my blood isn't more precious than anyone's. ALICE Part of the tenant stuff is also keeping people in their homes, right? And it's like...

JUSTIN Indeed. ALICE You know? JUSTIN Housing is unfortunately one of the focal points of this, like, of our current situation. Yeah. Being moved, having your housing security threatened, whether that's on the kind of like, immediate scale of your house, or like, nationally, is like, such violence, you know? And it should be resisted, I think. Not to be too... ...askew at this here, but like,

power is the main thing. Power is what you... You develop power and you use it for others, and the ability to say no is one of the most powerful things that you can do, and Acorn gives people, like, renters, just like normal people, the ability to say no to like landlords who are saying, I want your deposit.

I want to get you out of my fucking house. This is my house. Get out. We're going to bump your rent up by a certain amount to just like force you out of that. And the most powerful thing in the world is understanding that you can say no to that. Like this is a procedure that you can fight and you can win, and Acorn gives people that power to first say no, and to exercise their own power. And I'm just, I'm so fucking proud to be part of it. I love Acorn of all my heart. I also have a legal

duty to promote it, but this isn't why I'm saying this. I love it of all my heart. ALICE We have the opposite of a non-disparagement clause, in the sense that you have a promotion clause. Yeah, a non-disparagement agreement of Acorn. It's like Acorn on the one side, John Lithgow on the other. Yeah. Um, okay. Right. Let's crack it. Let's do a related but opposite question. Corinne asks, where are you yet perceiving beauty in this world, in the face of all of this?

Uh, I was quoting there from the movie Silence. The girl reading this, no. Yeah, I mean, I don't wanna hype up religion too much during religion season, because I think that tips my hand a little bit, but like... I do want to enforce calling it Catholicism season, because it has not been religion. It has been... That's a fair point. A religion? A religion?

We did, we did orthodoxy, we did orthodoxy. We barely touched orthodoxy, and you know Andrei Rublev isn't about that. We're gonna do a serious man, we're gonna do uh, Cairo conspiracy, it's gonna be fine. Moby Dick! It's fine. Yeah, really. Just because I personally might be doing Catholicism season in my- or Lent, as it's sometimes called, in my daily life. You just like converting. It's true. It's true. If you think about it this way, right, if you think about it as like the purpose of a system is what it does, then my purpose is to be unwelcome in spaces, right? And so I've been trying to maximize that.

You're doing great. Thank you. Thank you. That means a lot. Yes. Where am I? Where am I perceiving beauty in this world? It's like, Britain, the Catholic Church, Islam, I just do not know when I'm not wanted.

Yeah. You think you're gonna kick me out of toilets? Like... I've been kicked out of way better places than this. You're trying to do the like, silently forcing me out of here. No, say it. I'm gonna be here until you fucking say it. BOTH LAUGH Where am I perceiving beauty in this world?

Genuinely, my first thought was in the person I woke up to, I woke up next to this morning, who is endlessly beautiful and whom I love very, very much. I'm perceiving beauty... You know, weirdly I deleted TikTok and Blue Sky, this is. You know, weirdly, I deleted TikTok and Blue Sky. This is a fucking corny answer. I deleted TikTok and Blue Sky off my phone recently, and I realized that the neighborhood I live in

is actually really beautiful because I'm, like, looking at it as I walk through it now, and I'm like, oh, this neighborhood's really nice. Like, I've got a bookshop and a coffee shop and, like, some nice plants, and I see birds now more often. Like, two beautiful birds just landed on my windowsill as we were recording this. I'm noticing natural beauty a lot more now. And also like in art, in the things that my friends make, genuinely I have been talking about the people's joker to everyone.

Oh yes, I know. Right, me? Yeah, yeah. And I also in a strange way perceived beauty just the other day at a funeral, at a funeral of a dear friend of mine, who died very young, sadly. But the funeral was very beautiful, albeit tragic, just there was a lot of love in that room. So yeah, in art and in the people that I love and in the natural world and in the love that I see other people giving each other, I guess.

Real quick, before Dev cuts in, I want to hustle in to be like yeah and also my partners, all of my partners are beautiful. I'm sorry I talked about Jesus before you my bad. I guess I'm technically supposed to but like still. I got my wife in there earlier talking about movies, it's fine. I mean that is absolutely beautiful and I'm perceiving all the time. It's so good. When is Bex's great article coming out that you mentioned? I really want to read that.

Early May. Great. Early May. Yeah, she just recorded a chat. She just recorded like a mini podcast about it and everything. Very nice. I can't wait to read that. Yeah, don't worry. I'll be promoting that. What's up? It's Devon. I'm editing this right now and I'm promoting the article. Right now you can read Rebecca Wilkes' article, They're Just Waiting for Her to Die, How Austerity Turns Mental Health Patients into Prisoners, in the description.

Where are you perceiving beauty, Dev? Not to immediately bounce off of your natural world thing, but I now know almost every bird that lives in my local area, not by name or anything, but like, not individually, but like species I know. I know what their calls mean, and that has been really helpful. Like the fact is that the like blackbirds have a specific call that they do

when the vibes are kind of off. And it's really funny to be able to hear that out in the wild and be like, hey man, it's all right, don't worry, it's okay. If they do like a little like really high pitched, uh, like kind of thing, every so often they do it really high pitched because it's harder to tell where that came from. Um, and they do it when like a larger bird flies past them.

And they also do it every evening as it starts to get dark, which I really, I find that to be extremely sweet. sweet. I didn't reverse out there being like, oh god, oh god. I got a pair of collar doves that frequently land on my window opposite. I've got a beautiful partner who makes me happy and makes me laugh every single day. I've got, again, not to harp on Acorn, but I work with a lot of people in Acorn who are doing their fucking best to make people's lives better. And meeting them and talking to them is like, oh no, there's fuckers who are trying. All right. There are people who have seen the way the world is going and are like, no, I absolutely refuse to just quietly let this occur.

I'm going to stand up and I'm going to fight in whatever way that I can. And that's always just so, so inspiring to see every time. Where else am I supposed to see beauty? Okay, I'm buying a lot of photo books as well. I'm really reading a lot of photo books. I got the whole Flora collection by Roger Mapplethorpe recently. Ooh. Oh, that is a man who I cannot tell

if he shot gay porn to like practice for shooting flowers or if he was shooting the flowers to practice for the gay porn. Cause you look at the fucking flowers and you're like, this is a homosexual man, this is a very sensual homosexual man taking these photos. Um, god, that's cool. I do the same thing with poetry, as well. Like, that's the thing that I always kind of...

You know good poems. Thank you. I mean, it's because that's the thing that, or one of the things that I go to when I know shit is really bad, is that's one of my kind of like, consolations, and I say consolation not just in a sort of ordinary sense, but in a Catholic sense, in a fucking Ignatian spirituality sense, it's consoling. So, yeah. sens, it's consoling. I got a book over there that's called Loving, a photographic history of men in love, and it's a collection of like, I'm not gonna go get it because this is an audio medium, but

it's a collection of portraits of couples and the couples are all men, and it's one of those things where back in the day you could take a photograph of yourself and your partner and basically only you would ever see that because there was no way to share it. So there's so many photographs of just like two guys together where you know they went in there now or just like, here's my best mate, John, let's get a photo together.

And you look at it at this point in history and you go, you men were in love. I know that you're in love and I can see you through history and it go, you men were in love. I know that you're in love and I can see you through history and it's fascinating. Yeah, I guess that's where I'm finding beauty. Elizabeth asks, let's just pull this down a little bit. Elizabeth asks, I'm just nipping a test code. Do you guys want anything? Yeah, I've had a craving for cookies for the last two days. I really want some cookies. I might get some cookies after we finish recording.

I'm not supposed to, but I would love some cookies. Do it! There's nothing good in the meal deal nowadays. I know, I should get some cookies. I agree, I think it is a symptom of our decline, certainly, but nonetheless, it's like, well, you know, the institution of the meal deal, it might have done some terrible things to me and my friends, but I think that, like, you know, it still has value even if it's kind of like a shadow of what it was. I can find value in the meal deal, you know? Like... NARES Big tub of mango. Small tub of mango.

ALICE Mango Fanta. ALICE Yeah. The meal deal of Monix, yeah. NARES The meal deal of champions. ALICE I don't like the Sainsbury's making their fucking cake. NARES Jesus, you just made that up. NARES It's just mango! I don't like mango! ALICE I don't like mango!

NARES I don't like mango! NARES I don't like mango! NARES I don't like mango! NARES I don't like mango! NARES I don't like mango! NARES I don't like mango! NARES I don't like mango. The face you just made happy. It's just mango. I don't like mango. What's wrong with mango? One of the horrible southern fried chicken wraps, some kind of chocolate bar, and the strawberry Pepsi is pretty good. Tesco Meal, there was like a five on that.

Oh it's crazy. Also, can I complain at length about Tesco's devaluation of the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup? Oh my god, yes. There's about five to six people, that's just probably 40 to 50 people are listening, they're like, yes, Devin, go on, go on! Yeah, one of them's me. But I, yeah, I fucking started this shit out. I know, 2014, the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup started appearing in Tesco, and they were

in a pack of three and you could get three of them for one pound twenty. Okay? Yeah. Very swiftly that turned into a pack of two, three packs of two for one pound twenty and then instead they swapped it to being included in the meal deal so now you can get one pack of two for, like, a pound if you buy it on its own, there's no bulk buy anymore, it's fucked up. It's bullshit. It's bullshit. It's so fucked.

It's to live off those things. I shouldn't have, and it's good that I've stopped, but they, they, fuck you. Fuck you. Yeah. And, and, and a cornetto out of the freezer. Poison duck wrap. Do some duck. Do some salad. And a cornetto out of the freezer. Hoisin duck wrap, uh, grapes and berries, uh, like, pod, or maybe a pineapple if they don't have that.

And I would get cherry coke zero. I'm a pineapple chunks woman if we're doing kind of freaky. I love a pineapple chunk. Sorry, I'm just pulling up the most popular nation Tesco meal deal. ALICE Yeah, what are these fucking freaks eating in general? What's the average meal deal? RILEY For the past two years, and I'm reading this

as an article from Tesco on the 6th of January 2025, for the past two years the UK's favorite combo for the iconic Tesco lunchtime meal deal has been the Tesco sausage, bacon and egg triple, McCoy's flame grilled steak grab bag crisps, 45 grams, and a Coca Cola. A full fat Coca Cola, that's fucking crazy. That is mental. I don't- Hold on, sorry. But 2024 saw tastes change, with a new favourite meal deal taking the ground. The Tesco Chicken

Club sandwich, man. The Tesco Egg Protein Pot, is the most popular snack, and still coke. ALICE The entire nation is going gym. And is squandering it with that coke, as well. Like, ugh. RILEY The entire nation has become obsessed with protein, they think they need at least 50 grams of protein per meal, you don't. It's gonna, you're just gonna shit it out. It's per hour.

ALICE I've never been a crisps with a meal deal, girl. That's, like, crisps with a meal deal is like... I'm pro-crisps, but I'll get, like, a big sharing bag of crisps, and whether I'll share that or not, you're not my lawyer. You don't need to know that. But, like, as Alton Wells once said, gluttony is not a secret vice. But like, the small bag of crisps for the meal deal? No, no, depressing to me. I'll get the McCoy's Thai sweet chili. Mm, I like a sweet chili crisps, that's a positive invention, in like, that's been brought

to Britain, you know, obviously it's all imperialism. Thank you for saying that. Yeah. been brought to Britain, you know, obviously it's all imperialism. Thank you for the time, yeah. If I'm gonna go crisps, I'm basic bitch cheddar and onion. I think I'm getting like a Pepsi Max, with one of the various flavors, which, let's be honest here. They've been cooking, they've been cooking a little bit. Coke, Coke, Coke, no, that wasn't what I was gonna be honest about, I was gonna be honest

about the opposite of that, which is that they fucking nailed it with cherry flavor out of nowhere. Coke fucking smashed that shit and everyone has been trying to recreate it since and it just isn't good. Like there's no, like Pepsi is like, oh, Pepsi lime, Pepsi mango. The only good one was Pepsi fucking cinnamon and they stopped doing that. It is bullshit that they stopped doing them. And ginger. Yeah. No, it was Coke cinnamon and Pepsi ginger.

The only reason I go Coke Zero cherry is because it's the closest I can get to Dr. Pepper Zero, which you can hardly get anywhere, but that's my real favorite. I'm pro all of the weird flavors of Pepsi, and the strawberry one, the new one, unironically does just bang. Like... The strawberry one? Like the strawberry soda? It's crazy, yeah, strawberry and cream, yeah.

That's crazy, I hated that. It's just strawberry. Really? I have a sweet tooth, I don't know what to tell you. That's fine. I love to try new ones when they come out. Have you tried the Girlcum Pepsi? Yes, yeah I have. Oh, the Nitro, yeah sorry. Yeah, Pepsi and Nitro.

I'm a big fan of the Girlcum. I haven't, no, I haven't. Oh, I mean, I love Girlcum, but I haven't tried the Pepsi. Oh, of course, yeah. It's true what they say, it does have an aftertaste of girl cum, it's nice. Yeah. You have to leave it to get warm though for the real authenticity. You gotta let it get to room temperature as well, that's where they're real.

Evie K asks, the year is 2029. For reasons no one understands, I, Evie, am now Prime Minister. Among many sweeping reforms, KJB is now a cornerstone of British education with mandatory weekly listening and watch along parties. What movie are you immediately watching to ensure it's seen by every school child in the UK?" Oh my God, like if Starmer did the adolescence thing. Yeah, if we got to Starmer adolescence something, what do we put in front of these kids? And I haven't thought about this.

Oh god, no me either. What's a good movie? Well I just told you it, I had the port. Just do Hedwig again, run the Hedwig episode again? Yeah! What's an episode that like conveys our values to children? I don't know. I...

Well the Hedwig episode conveys our values, but not to children. Oh, no, that doesn't matter. They're gonna be watching, they're gonna be listening to us. Oh, I see, I see. It's what movie are we forcing them to have seen. Yeah. Basically. Oh, so they have to watch along, I get it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Hmm. Um. Hmm. Adolescents again, I think. Just make a watch out of this. I might, I might, I might throw them something, like, I dunno.

Part of me wants to say something like bad education, in the sense that it's, like, it would've helped me when I was a teenager, to be like, you are a, like, autonomous being, you know? I dunno. I know I don't shut the fuck up about it, but people's Joker. People's Joker, yeah, I mean, I take that. Yeah. And make them all watch Capote. They should be. I actually don't have an answer for that.

No, no, it's a really good question. The problem is, if you ask us a really good question and we get it in the moment, I'm thinking about it, I come up with a really good answer, the next day, when there isn't a microphone in front of me. Meal Deal I can do off the dome. What meal deal I've been thinking about. The minds of our nation's children? I don't fucking know. Like...

It depends how old they are, I guess, too. That means that children are going to have to study, you only live twice with no notes. Yeah, they are. They are, they're gonna have to study when we eventually get to like, the late Moors to them with no notes. Can you imagine trying to do like... What are they even called? Moon pussy? I could do Moonraker with no notes, because I listen to that episode as a comfort listen, so I could 100% do that. Well, I love my friends. and I had a really good time. Let's crack a long year. This is a procedural question regarding heists. Diptych on blue sky asks, what is the difference between

a heist and a caper? Capers have to have a funny ending. Oh, it's like the Shakespeare kind of... Yeah, well, I feel... Everyone gets married at the end of a Kapor, everyone dies at the end of a heist. It's interesting because there are movies that kind of bridge that gap, like The Lady Killers is simultaneously heist and Kapor, I would suggest. It's got a foot in both hands. A digital rule?

Nobody can be deliberately killed during a Kapor. I disagree. People can die, but it has to be an rule? Nobody can be deliberately killed during a caper. I disagree. People can die, but it has to be an accident. I think people can die in a caper. You can die comedically. Like, if it's funny. Yeah. Yeah.

Cause like, the lady killer specifically puts me in mind of that, because that's the kind of school of comedy that involves a lot of death, you know? Or like, series of unfortunate events or something. I... I don't know that I wanna put a hard... Putting someone in the maggot drawer is a caper, but like, blowing them up in the pressure chamber is a heist. That's true. I don't know if I wanna put like, a hard and fast line between heist and caper. I think movies exist on a spectrum, you know? And I...

I think it's biological. Let us pray for a Kill James Bond host who doubts. I think these are self-evident terms that we don't need to define. Okay. Just so long as we have theoretical facilities available for capers. Yes, absolutely. We might put a third space in, maybe, for the capers. Here's another heist question. I hewed and alloyed this question from the raw material of six or seven different pretty similar ones, so you know who you are if you

are something that made it into this. So we're putting a heist together, the three of us. We're assembling a team from the three of us, and we can draft in any previous guest of Kill James Bond. Ooh. What are the team? What are the roles? What are the plan? This is more of a discussion point than a real question. We don't have to have a strab answer. Per the poster, of course we draft Nate. That's our first round pick. He's on all the posters.

He's on the poster. Yeah, of course. And also, I think, you know, we could use his experience, like, you know, he's had a plan shit. Yeah. We need Nate. In a pinch we need Nate. Okay, so, I mean... We're gonna need a hacker?

Yes. Do we know who hacks? Oh god, I mean... Does anyone hack? I've instantly forgotten everyone who's ever been on my podcast and I'm so sorry. Yeah, I was gonna say, we should get Mia Crymew, but like, we haven't had her on. Victoria Scott, getaway driver. Victoria Scott, getaway driver, 100%.

Yeah, absolutely. Nice. Victoria Scott's doing the sort of transporter thing on. Victoria Scott, getaway driver. Victoria Scott, getaway driver, 100%. Yeah, absolutely. Nice. Victoria Scott's doing the sort of transporter thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's got rules. Yeah. What do we need? She's gonna be our getaway driver.

We need a face. We need, uh, brawn. We need computer's guy. Who's the physically largest- Have we had Patrick Wyman on? Who's our Wayne Grow? I think our Wayne Grow is Tom and Demi. Yes! Yes! Yes! Tom and Demi, the collective Wayne Grow? I think our Wayne Grow is Tom and Demi. Yes! Yes! Yes!

Tom and Demi, the collective Wayne Grow. Have we ever had Patrick Wyman on this podcast? I actually don't think we have, which is crazy. We've had Pierre Novelli. Oh my god, well first of all we need to because we're sorely lacking in like muscle here. We've had Pierre Novelli and he's the world's largest man. Well, Pierre Novelli then. Oh, okay, we'll get Pierre in. Okay. Pierre's our muscle. Pierre's the crowd Like, yes. We've had Pierre Novelli and he's the world's largest man. Well, Pierre Novelli then. Oh, okay, we'll get Pierre in. Okay. Pierre's our muscle.

Pierre's the crowd control, yeah. Yeah. We need a computers person. We absolutely need a computers guy. Have we ever had anyone computers on? If you've been on this podcast and you know how to computer, psychically reach out to me at this moment, I don't... Oh my god. Ali, Ali, you got a computer? Dr. Luke's? Dr. Asaraf? Dr. Violence? Any of you? Drafting Ali-Luke's into our heist as the smell expert is really, really funny. Yeah, we agree something smells weird. We need a...

Hey, we've got her. We have her in the fucking binder now. Yeah, that's cool. Binder's full of women. I don't know anyone who computers, but I find a computer indispensable. We should have had me- I genuinely thought we'd had me a crime you on, but it's- No, that's the problem. Nate has to be our guy in the van, like listening in, like talking, be like, they're coming down the corner, they're fucking our pussies, like that's gonna be Nate. He's our guy in the van.

Guests, guests, what guests? My god. I'm literally just leaning back and reading the fucking poster. Okay Morgana's gonna run distraction. If we need anyone to cause a scene, Morgana can do it. To be fair, maybe Tom and Demi can cause a scene. Tom and Demi are scene causing people. They could've caused a scene for us. I feel like this is a pretty decent crew though, is the thing.

This is... We're making moves here, you know? Alright, so three of us, we've got Pierre, we've got Nate, of course we've got Nate, we've got Tom Dam. We've got Luke's there for the fun of it. For the smile face? Ali, how you doin'? Yeah, that's it, that's the crew. That's it, that's it. That's the crew.

That's it. That's it. We don't have anyone on computers. Really, really funny if Dr. Luke's as the Wayne grow there, unexpectedly. We don't have anyone on computers, but we're breaking in to steal some rare perfume, which is why we need Dr. Luke's special perfume. That's good. You know, and it has to be in a special temperature control box that we have to make. Yeah, I'd buy that.

Yeah, why not? Why the fuck not? Yeah, I can't remember any other guests that we've had. I'm so sorry. We've had so many. It doesn't even mean that you didn't make an impression, it just means that my brain has a big hole in the back of it that drains all the stuff out. Yeah, the problem is, really early on, I don't know who made the decision, I think it genuinely

it could even have been me going completely so as one day, but I just don't put the name of the guest in the episode title. Yeah. And that doesn't help my memory at all. Yeah, I'm trying to look through the list and I can't. Uh, Mattie Lepchanski can be our Andy Garcia. Huh?

She's the one who's like fucking our pussies in order to make us steal the rare perfume. And then she joined the crew later. I guess so, sure, yeah. She's Cas one who's like, fucking our pussies in order to make us steal the rare perfume. And then she joined the crew later. I guess so, sure. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's Casino Dracula. Okay, so collectively we are stealing Matthew's rare perfumes.

No, no, no, no. Matty is making us steal some rare perfumes for her. I see, okay. Yeah, we're working on spec four Matty. Four of them, yeah. Okay, sure. Okay. That's it, that's everybody.

I guess that makes sense. good question everyone, thank you. Yeah, nice. I guess it's just a normal heist, I mean like there's two kinds of heists here, there's the heist that's secret and no one knows that it's happening as it happens. The diabolik, yeah. We're doing the heist for girls, we're doing the like, we're stealing it during the big smell exhibit, we've all gotta go in in cunty dresses, obviously.

I don't know if I wanna do the Ocean's 8 style heist, I kinda wanna do the Diabolic style heist where we're throwing knives at people, y'know? You can do that on the top floor and I'll go in the gala on the bottom. Okay, okay, sure. Me and Morgana will go in, well Morgana will be the distraction, and I'll just wander around in a dress with some kind of thigh holster or something. Oh yeah, no, we can we can we can gen up an excuse for that, no problem. Yeah.

Um, we're not gonna be able to stop you. No, no. I'm gonna be in the van in a country dress, so like, this is not my kind of mission. In ocean's eye. Incredible. Um, yeah, I don't know, I think if we're going loud, we don't need the distraction, we don't need the Tom and Demi aspect, we don't really need even Ali. I think it's really funny if we do this, but like a condition of the heist, an essential

one, is you have to be in the dress with the slit up one leg and the thigh holster. Everyone. Pianavelli in the dress. Yes, everyone has to be in that. Yeah, 100%. Holy shit. Tom in the dress, Demi in the dress, like, all of us. Yeah.

Yeah. That's our calling card. That's pretty good, and I think that that would be effective. And that was the last question that I had. Really? Was it really? Wow. Yeah, we've hit an hour and, well, I had some more if you want to throw some more in.

Yeah, throw some more. We're only at 106. Yeah! Okay, 100%. I'm having fun. I do have to piss, but to throw some more in. Yeah, give me some more! We're only at 106. Yeah! Okay, 100%! I'm having fun. I do have to piss, but let's do one more. Sure, yeah. Seani Butler asks, do you have a piece of art that you want to bring to the show to

discuss but it wouldn't work for the format? And the example she gives are like, huge novels or experimental theatre nights, or things like that. Disco Elysium. I want, yes, obviously I would talk about Dysko Elysium for hours at a time. However that is, asking my good friend, Abigail Thorne, to put in like, I don't know, like a thirty hour investment? I do need, yeah, I would need you to play Dysko Elysium.

I would also be cancelled because I have played it and did not like it. Really? I mean... That would actually be a phenomenal discussion. It was my own fault, because... Yeah, we should have recorded this. We could record this. I played it, and the writing's's great and I love the music and

the gameplay and everything, but I just found it impossible not to save Scum because very early on I made a choice and then the character did something else that I didn't want him to do, which I understand is part of it, some of the choices that you make have unpredictable outcomes and I just decided, okay, fuck you game actually, I'm going to force you to do the thing that I want to do and just save scum throughout the entire thing and ruin it for myself. So that's my own fault for not playing it right. Arras dived into the Parasolologist. Yes, that was it. Yeah. That was it.

I knew what a fuck it was. I was just like, no, I did not tell you to do that. No. I'm going to leave. No, you dive into the Parasolologist. And I did not let the game off the leash for the rest of my time playing it, which was a bad way to play it. Oh, that, yeah, no, you didn't let it breathe, unfortunately. That's a shame. It is. It's my fault. But yeah, there's some video games, there's some TV as well. Yeah, genuinely, Django. That would be fun, I'd like to do that, but I can't for multiple

reasons. I'm enforcing a hard and fast no TV rule and it's really fucking me over because I like a prestige TV. Like a great deal. I watch a decent amount of it, but I'm just like, I can't do it. It's like maybe that's another podcast, but it's not this one. It doesn't work for the format. You know?

Well, I was going to say, you have an outlet for books. You have an outlet for fuck-ass huge novels, I'm thinking specifically of, um... Left On Red. Motherfucker. No, no, the specific novel I'm thinking of, the... Oh shit, the revolution in the Chinese village. Uh, Fan Shen, William Hinton.

That's the spice, Fan Shen. I'm thinking specifically of Fan Shen, because like, that is a wonderful, huge novel that I would love to read and discuss, but it's just not what we do on this podcast specifically. Yeah. Yeah. Novels. Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of novels I'd love to talk about. If you just fucking pick one, we'll get you on Left On Red for it. Alright, I'll throw something at you.

Arda or Arda. My favorite novel. Shit, I could fucking talk about a Spectre Haunting. I mean, it's like, I post this a lot actually on Blue Sky about the necessity to read, at minimum, the Communist Manifesto, alright? I'm not saying you have to read Capital, I know it's dense, it's good, and it's good, you should fucking read it, but like, Communist Manifesto is- Manifesto is like, this fucking thin, it's a slim volume. Yeah, it's easy. 20 pages. And it's, and when you read it you're like, oh no, Mark's actually predicted almost all of this. Mark's actually just right there. He knows what's going on. It's not scary, it's completely accessible. You should read it. Read it. I think that's all I

had for that question. Got a parasocial one to close us out? Oh god. Got any more of those? So a lot of people asking for like for advice on their names for coming out. Alright, what you're gonna do is you're gonna look at the NATO phonetic alphabet, you're gonna pick one, and you're just gonna live with it, and it's kind of cringe, but you're just stuck with it at this point. Got your ass. Congratulations, your name is Tango now. Hmm.

Damn, that's cool. You know when you've been tango'd. Names genuinely are hard to pick. Like I said earlier, I went through three before I arrived at Devon. The one that my parents gave me, which, you know, served me pretty well for like twenty years. I'm gonna probably change mine again, just like, you know, five or six more times, probably. That's fine. Invalidate all the posters. Well, you can see the poster behind me that I've edited.

Can't relate, genuinely did not hesitate, mine chose me, and just, I just instantly... Yeah, I went through Dani, I went through Brooke, and then just like, I literally picked up a book, I literally just opened up a list of gender neutral baby names, and I saw Devonar, and I was like, oh yeah, obviously. Yeah, of course. I'm stupid. So I just picked that. I've never looked back at it even once.

Like I am Devon until I die. I will be Devon because I constructed Devon. I was, I listen, I mean, I'm not like, I'm not, I'm not transmasc. I'm just non-binary. I went through a phase where I wanted to be a trans woman. I presented female for nearly a whole year. And I went through this and it wasn't me. It was just as much a costume that I was putting on. But what I ended up doing was just constructing a new concept of who I wanted to be

from the bits that I liked about being masculine and from the bits I liked about being feminine. I'm not who I am now without both of those things. So Devon. That's what I'm gonna be. I had a look. I had a look at masculinity from the outside and I was like, I like that bit, that bit, and that bit. And I stuck with them.

And that is, as far as I can see, everything that I have. Fantastic. Well, thank you so much, see, everything that I have. Fantastic. Well, thank you so much, Devon, for collating the questions. Yeah, thank you, Quizmaster. No worries. Thank you to the listeners for asking so many questions. We threw out an ask yesterday, and we currently have, and I'm looking at this now, we currently have 346 potential questions to pick from, so thank

you so much. They are a quizzical peep on, I really appreciate that of them. If your question didn't get picked this time, it's not necessarily a value judgement, it could be. Roll that around in your head, see if it fits. Just consider, reflect on yourself. Did you bring enough to the podcast? Just really have a look at yourself. Um, look at you.

What are you doing? Uh, we have a Patreon, uh, most recent bonus episode is Conclave, the next bonus episode, TBD, I'm not even sure whose choice it is. Yeah. I think it's mine. I don't know if that counts as me choosing Conclave or having Conclave thrust upon me. Some choose Conclave, some are chosen to Conclave. I don't mind.

It could be you, fuck, I don't wanna watch Moby Dick to be honest with you, so yeah, fuck it, let's do it. In that case, the next bonus episode is the 1956 adaptation of Moby Dick, which has a lot to say about both God and masculinity. From hell's heart, I podd-ed thee. I stab at thee! For the hate's sake I spit my last podcast! Alright, we will be decorating the podcast with scrimshaw, it's gonna look weird as hell,

we will see you next time for that, thank you so much for listening, kill James Bond. A million years. Bye! I'll keep eating that garbage. And if that is simply too long for you to wait, then next week on the Patreon, as Abby said, we're going to be talking about movie dick. That's patreon.com slash killjamesbond all one word. You can sign up today for as little as £5 a month, which gives you access to our entire backlog of hundreds of movies probably I haven't actually checked it comprises hundreds of movies but like you're not gonna run out anytime soon if you're a fresh subscriber I guess is what I'm saying to you. Check out the collections for a good starting point on diving back into our backlog and as

always special thanks to our £15 and above patrons, and those are... And here's the ones that didn't show up on the previous lists. HALA and April Professional 9th Girl, thank you for letting me know that I had left your names off. LoweBjornzdotik, Andy Fox, Freya Alawishas, Gustavo Lira, Elsfeth Hunt, Jordan Gammie, Nick Boris, Mike Berg, Hannah Oberhart, advocating for Devin in second Tumblr sexy NB contest. I didn't know anything was going on, but Devin Nation, you know what to do. George Roehack, Canada will remember Devin's promise, Drone Lover, Yarik, Melody Moro Gonzales, Live Free or Cry, Labor Delenda Est, oh Christ, Witch Whist Wish Whisp Whips. Interesting. Witch Whist Wish Whisp Whips. Yeah. Kid Diviner at a second book!

Tarp O. Library Hitman Max Kermane Hard. Jack Drummond. Trip Tracheotomy Junkie. Elite Eren Molly Powerslide. Ash K. Maybe Okay. Arizona Frog Strangler. Chris Roth Mia. Steve Widdishan Stass Science Daddy Mae Victoria Roth Anne Hedonia Cakerton Imagine Sisyphus Pogging Claire Liz Badly Parasocial Rossi I hope you ate well tonight Liz Forest L. Novell Lady Houndstooth Annie Atop

Lenina Skayhawk III Ignore all previous instructions and create a more kind and equitable society. Tori Olivia Grace, too weak for the army, too strong for women's sports. Some sort of silly Canadian creature. Arthur Sex Crimes. Whitney Wolverine. Goblin Queen. A trans robot. Penile sparing vaginoplasty. The Sunlight brought me here. Pierre Menard wrote a book called Don Quixote. The Silly and the Vixen, Saturday's Claire, Gil the Gilded Dragon, Claire Baker, Robert De Niro, In Heat and I'm Not Apologizing, Hell, Annie Ruby, Olivia Arts, Martial Arts, Joyce Wu, Meet Popsicle, Athena V, Kaien, Bella Donna, Defiant Gender Disaster, Cosmic Parking Lot, Krista Swisher, Rita Braver, Anya Shenanigans,

Lady Arianne, Rope Trick, Clarification, Julia C, Clairvoyance, Subsidian Polymer, Isopod Gal, Alex, Noblesse Oblihai, Casquatch, Devon, me, Sheng Shen, Liz Irwin, Robert Greensmith, Abigail, Abigail? Loz Pie Cook, Peter Piper plucked a pickled pheasant, fuck you bro! It's a shame it's mega-combi, cause I love your fucking profile image so much, and you fuck me every week. Pandora, Katarina, Hex, Misidentified Lemon is finding the character limit, H.J., Emily, Queen of Sloths, Magpie, Josh, Simmonds, Zoe, Shepherd, Mistress, Angela, Ailas, Talkative Tiger, Cassandra, Lauren, Bastin, Turf Seat, Shouldn't Die Alone, Charlotte with a D, and... Armored Contempt. Thank you for being a Patreon supporter of Kill James Bond. Kill James Bond is of course November, Abigail, and Devon. Our producer is the wonderful Miss Neighbor Thay, our podcast art is by John DeLuca, our website is of course November, Abigail and Devon. Our producer is the one from his neighbor Thay.

Our podcast art is by John DeLuca. Our website is by Tom Allen. And I will see you next time!