Kill James Bond! - S4E45: The Taking of Pelham 123 (2009)

Episode Date: August 21, 2026

The takings of Pelham 123 will continue until morale improves. ---- HANDS OFF LEBANON Here are some fundraisers to support collective rebuilding and survival efforts on the ground in Lebanon. -Beit El-Baraka started out as a food bank, but has grown to help people afford rent, cover their essentials, and live with dignity.  https://beitelbaraka.org/donate-directly/ or donate in general https://beitelbaraka.org/donate-now/ -LiveLove was a charity for a number of other matters, but since 2024 has been solely comitted to helping people displaced by Israeli attacks. https://livelove.org/donate -Lebanese Food Bank supports displaced and impoverished people https://lebanesefoodbank.org/take-action/donate/ Solar Powered Lebanon is an initiative to restore people's power using solar panels, since larger infrastructure is at constant risk of attack. https://fundahope.com/en/campaigns/solar-powered-lebanon ----- FREE PALESTINE My friend Ahmed still needs to feed his family and afford medicine. Anything you can kick in would be hugely appreciated. https://chuffed.org/project/150817-please-help-ahmed-and-his-family-get-food-drink-and-medicine And these are some more general links you can support collective efforts with! -The Palestinian Communist Youth Union is doing a food and water effort, and is part of the official communist party of Palestine https://www.gofundme.com/f/to-preserve-whats-left-of-humanity-global-solidarity -Water is Life, a water distribution project in North Gaza affiliated with an Indigenous American organization and the Freedom Flotilla https://www.waterislifegaza.org/ -Vegetable Distribution Fund, which secured and delivers fresh veg, affiliated with Freedom Flotilla also https://www.instagram.com/linking/fundraiser?fundraiser_id=1102739514947848 ----- WEB DESIGN ALERT Tom Allen is a friend of the show (and the designer behind our website). If you need web design help, reach out to him here:  https://www.tomallen.media/ Kill James Bond is hosted by November Kelly, Abigail Thorn, and Devon. You can find us at https://killjamesbond.com

Hello and welcome to another episode of Kill James Bond. I am November Kelly. I am joined, as always, by my friends Abigail Thorne and Devon. Hello. Cowabunga, how are we doing, everyone? Feeling like New York City as a character in the movie again is how I'm feeling. I'm feeling amazing. You know, you can get to Laundry Zero so easily in the climate apocalypse.

It's not rained all summer. No, it's true. I'm fucking right there. It's great. As long as you don't think, so long as you just make, manage to not think about it ever, then it's fine. It's not... That's how I'm coping.

The plants dying around us. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. Well, in between smelling the wildfire smoke from the valleys. Yeah. We got blacketed in yesterday. Oh, it's going great. It's not going wonderfully. I mean, my partner just sent me a load of their photos that they took, their film photos.

And one of them is of a little concrete sort of engraving in the ground that says, every blade of grass is worth its weight in gold and then the grass that should be next to that is completely dead and it looks like a kind of like a sunburned Dorito and so I think maybe that's amazing things in the year of our Lord 26 and not going so well but we can always find refuge in movies I wake up this morning and I look to my wife and I say

I've got to watch the taking of Pelham one two three and she goes again it will never I'm like, yes. We will never be free of it. After this one, after this one dies and we have to re-record this episode, we'll then go to the 1998 TV movie, and then we're gonna have to take two attempts at that. We're stuck in the Pound Dimension.

I wasn't expecting it, but we are the hostages here. Oh. And our hostage taker is much more bombastic this time. So we're watching the 2009 remake of the Taking A Pelham, 2, 3,000, because I realized about five minutes into this that I thought I'd seen this before, but I think I've actually actually actually seen a different Denzel Washington train crash movie? I've not seen this. Oh, you've seen you. I was excited. I have no idea what it is. Don't waste the listeners time by trying to remember it. It's annoying to listen to people do that on podcast. Let's both just try

to remember Denzel. That's fine. That's fine. Denzel Washington will be playing sort of guilt-ridden redemption seeking heroes on an unexpected mode of transport. Plain, train, Automobile, you name it. But so, yeah, this is the 2009, and it is a really 2009-feeling movie. Oh, it is. Oh, yeah. On take, I like it better than the original. I...

That's interesting to me. I think it's better, strong statement. I don't like it more. Listeners, I think if you can get past the 2000s editing, which is a big ass, but if you can get past it, I think this is a film worth watching. I just say, check it out. I think I enjoyed it. I think it's fun.

I think the original's better, but I did like it. I like Tony Scott. We'll talk about some other stuff that he's done. But as you say, the editing, I mean, this movie begins with a sort of picture in picture of the Columbia video and then it spreads out on the screen. And obviously, I flee because the movie's coming right at us, you know, like that one train. The Denzel Washington was driving. Yeah.

I had a good time with this one. To put my hat in the ring, I had a good time with this. I don't think it's better than the original, but I did have a good, it's like a mid diehard. It's like two or three. It's like, I'm having a good time here. Yeah, this is like, if they've made a diehard movie every year, this would have been like diehard 7. And that's fine. I would have, I would have sort of like gone to see it.

I would have had a good time. Travolta, I love as a villain. Yeah, this performance like is legit, a fantastic fucking bit of active from John Travolta. I think the film has, it's unfortunate, like technology has changed around it. So now we get this montage at the start, very 2000 of like the fast motion into slow motion, the stuttering, editing, the missing frames. And this was a deliberate stylistic choice at the time, but it's unfortunate because now it just looks like your internet connection is bad. And then the movie is buffering. And it's like, oh, that's, oh, oh, oh.

Making this choice at the time as well. They really were. If you've been watching every movie we've ever watched, which I do recommend you do, listeners, you will have seen taken, you will have seen wanted, which is very much like this. It's like, the camera is rotating around people at all times. The camera cannot, cannot stay still. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, this is a Tony Scott movie, RIP, RIPE, RITLY's brother. Rest in peace.

Oh, really? This took some, like, artistry to make it look this bad, right? And it was one of the things that Tony Scott was sort of interested in doing. This sort of speed ramping where it's like really, really fast motion, really, really slow motion. They used hand-cranked film cameras from, like, the 1910s to do this. Wow. I mean, that's cool. A lot of work to ask of your crew.

right and to create a really, really impactful visual effect. And in future episode and film I quite like Man on Fire, he uses this like intentionally. It's very disorienting. It feels a lot like if you ever played the video game, Max Payne 3 feels a lot like that. Gives you this sense of this guy who's completely adrift in the world. In this, he kind of uses it for everything and it really suffers from it.

And anytime there's New York happening, Anytime New York City should be a character in the movie, the way we try to convey that business is, yeah, is by fucking with the speed. Maybe this style would come back around again, because it's very ADHD. And as I'm given to understand that every child under 25 is lying about having ADHD so that they can annoy Telegraph columnists. So maybe this will come back around again. Yeah.

It is a little bit filmed like the fucking, like, the TikTok versions of movies where they're They have to change the framing because it's all middle-framed. Like, there are shots in this where it, in any other movie, it would be a wide shot of like three people all reacting. But in this one, it like goes to the first person, then who whips to the second, then whips to the third. And it looks exactly like pattern scanning for zoomers. Like it's like it's a speed racer, but it hasn't quite got there yet.

You know the Brian Eno quote about how the limitations of any medium are the thing that, you know, end up defining it where it's like people want to emulate the, like, crackle on vinyl records or like the scan lines and old TVs, right? Yeah. I look forward with horror to a future in which not only do we not even get the sunburned Dorito kind of grass, but no grass at all, but also people are emulating the 10% volume AI narration and a bunch of like flipping the video feed thing that movies clipped on Twitter do to avoid copyright strikes. Yeah. Just keep flipping it back and forth. Yeah, it feels a bit like that.

I look forward to the future where people are replicating podcast hosts trying to remember the names of things. Because an AI podcast host would have no need to do that because it would already know. It's true. Whichever trans- like future transgender movie creator is making that sort of like loving pastiche of exactly this timeline. I want to see it. Get in touch. And when they do, I hope that it also has the Jay-Z Lincoln Park crossover album in it. I said out loud to Becca.

I wonder how they're going to adapt this to a post-911 world and instantly 99 problems hit. I don't even think it's 99 problems. I think it's Jay-Z and Lincoln Park collision course, 99 problems. I had this on CD. I will cop to that. I will admit to that. I had this on CD. And so I...

They're all human. This, you know, as the first audio in the movie, this hits me. over the back of the head, like a brick. And then I see John Travolta, who at this stage in his career, is, look, it's a good performance. He's an inherently... He looks so funny. He's an inherently funny man.

I'm sorry, he's very recognizable. And it's... Yeah. And the problem is, with the editing, there's a lot of, like, the camera slamming over to him looking insanely funny. And it's really funny every time. Like, when he takes the train, when he takes Pelham, one, two, three... It like cuts across to him on the security camera and I like barked like a seal.

He's just stood there. He's got his little like black sunglasses, beanie, completely bald head. He's got the kind of like fucking, what would you even call it? It's a handlebar mustache like a biker. Yeah, the mustache for like Hulk Hogan type shit. Yeah, he's got like neck tattoos. He kind of looks like Cypher in the Matrix if Cypher like didroids. Sort of across between Cypher in the Matrix and the boyfriend from Hedvig and the Angry Inn.

It's like, why this guy in the world? And I'll tell you this for free, he ain't doing no hello train master type shit. No, he's not. He's not. No, he's not. No, he is. He immediately escalates to Agra. Like, he gets alongside the train driver and just puts a gun against his head.

He's like, I'm gonna fucking kill you. Like, he's a mean son of a bitch in this movie. It's great. However, the meanness is somewhat attenuated by the fact that this is old Travolta and there's a sort of valley in which cosmetic surgery was maybe not so good, and John Travolta still lives in that valley. I think it works. I kind of agree. It looks for the character.

In this case, 100%. Yeah. I do want to say, though, that, like, at this point, we really can't talk enough about how the, like, effect, how the speed ramping and the cuts and stuff, are getting genuinely obtrusive to watch, right? Because we've talked about the plot. We don't, like, they'll make some changes, but the actual hijacking of the train goes about basically the same way.

But I'm trying to watch this, and it's like trying to eat a sandwich that someone has locked in like a clear perspex box, right? Like I can, I can almost... They're moving it past you really quickly. Yeah. I guess I'm a bear in this analogy. I don't, but... I'm imagining you're an octopus, so you're like trying to open the box. Yeah, yeah, but I'm being fucking...

I'm trying to eat the sandwich, but there's some kind of bullshit interrupting me, you know? It's just encased in like gelatin or... or something, and it's just like, it's giving me a headache. Yeah, the low frame rate, it's coupled with the like crash zooms that they love doing mid-sentence on like a word that requires no amount of emphasis whatsoever. With the slow frame rate as well, it really does give you a little bit of motion sickness when you're starting to watch the film. You get used to it, kind of, but you only get used to it.

It doesn't get better or easier. Yeah, they're quite keen to establish the robbers here are, this isn't your grandfather's taking a Pellon 1, 2, 3, right? No. Not only do they not have cool outfits anymore, but they also... The fuck. They're way more violent, and they swear even. They're more violent and they swear, and they're not called Mr. Black, Mr. White,

none of that shit anymore. It's just names. Yeah, just their names. Raider. Yeah, it's Ryder, Ramos, and then two Nico Bellics from GTA4. Yeah, very sneakers, yeah. Yeah, don't worry about them at all. Don't get attached.

Yeah, they've got two wanggrows, both of him and Niko Bewick. They're not even really, Wayne Gros. I'm pushing back on that hard because my store for this is that this is our first ever movie where the heist has been planned and executed, led by a Waingrove. Yes, yes, I agree. The other two are just theirs. Yeah, no, just, just Ryder is the Waingrove. The Niko Belichs, they're like honorable soldiers.

They don't do anything too crazy. They do as they're told. basically throughout the whole thing. But it's John Travolta, who's the crazy one. The crazy one is John Travolta. Yeah. Yeah. There's something else that's happening on this train, which was a craze in the early 2000s.

If you can believe it, this is people worried about an awful lot at the time. I remember people worrying about this as a teenager, or rather, I read about it when I was a teenager and read about that they had worried about it 10 years previously. Is that cyber sex, which was a new thing back then? Like, there's a guy who is on webcam to his girlfriend on this massive 2009 Sony laptop. Yes, Sony. And she is like, you know, taking her clothes off on the webcam, like showing her, her, her bra to him. And he's like, goddamn, babe. And then he tragically loses the connection.

On the subway. Crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy. That's crazy. Oh, that's some 2009, baby. She's 2009 hot as well. You know, like, she's got the kind of... Kind of like, Elisha Kaspert aesthetic, is that who I'm thinking of? I have no idea who that is.

She was in 24, I think. She was the daughter in 24. She's 24, that's too young for me. Also, the other thing is, I've seen like six different directed by Tony Scott credits at this point, and as I'm getting sort of slacked about the head by the editing, I'm just like, bro, I'm not gonna forget, I promise. Oh, I know, man, no worry. Mm-hmm.

It's like, trying to do something whilst the film is like slapping you in the head and like, can't just show me the movie, man. It's like, we're gonna see your brother's film next to the bonus episode, and he's not gonna do this to me, you know? It's like watching a movie in 40X, but all of the 40X effects are just bullshit. It's just like, just hitting you. I'm like, stop it. I still want to talk about a brief and beautiful moment that I had here, but it doesn't pay off at all, but it was something I shared with the movie, because that's what we do for a job.

There is a bit where we're introducing the guys, like, the hijackers on the platforms. And, like, there is a brief shot of one of the hijackers and two big, rotund, like, turbo team-looking ass cowboys. Yes. Like, Wilford Brimley type guys. And I thought for a second, for a beautiful moment, that those were going to be our hijackers. Oh, cowboy heist. But the cowboy brothers are on the train for the rest of it. So I don't do anything at any point, but they're there.

And I loved seeing them. It's really frenetic. It doesn't have any of the kind of pathos of the first one where it's like, oh, this guy just missed his chance to be in the movie by missing the train, because it slaps you about the head before you get the chance to comprehend anything. But meanwhile, in the MTA control room, it's also not the 70s anymore. It's the future. And you can tell it's the future because everything's computer.

They've got the Death Star-type little console. It's a way to know what brand of monitor they were using. I wish I knew. Kill James Bond has been in many ways haunted by Sony's sub-brand of laptops Vio. Vio, all the time. Also had really obtrusive product placement in the Craig Bond. Yeah. When Craig Fingersuck does his big, like, heel turn on the boat and is like, the bitch is dead or whatever,

he's closing a big Sony Vio laptop moments before. It's really obtrusive. and they don't even make them anymore. You can still get a Sony laptop, but the Vio brand is dead. And I looked into this specifically because of the fact that they have haunted our podcast for years. Wow. It's the promise of the future that you can no longer access. That's crazy.

Wow. It should have a word for that. You used to have hopes, jobs, change, and now you don't even have a Sony Vio or grass. Yeah. You have have Cass. I have never been diagnosed with ADHD. Denzel Washington is here. Yes, he is.

At one point someone calls him Maestro, and I was really open they'd keep doing that, but they don't. No, no. He is our Garber. Yeah, he's a slightly put upon Garber. Everyone's kind of, you know, being nice to him. He spills coffee on himself at one point, and everyone goes, way, like they're in a British school cafeteria,

which is good. Pretty good. He's not a cop. He's just a subway dispatcher. He has the guy from the original one's movie, the guy who was like, I would sooner have all of these guys shot than negotiate with terrorists. So what do they want for their lousy 35 cents to live forever? Yeah, he's that guy. He's him. And we see that his boss

is kind of an asshole and his boss is a big glass office and we see that there's some history there and like he maybe is coming down in the world a bit to be working on this subway desk, but he's also very good at what he does, right? We see him sort of like handling all of the traffic very efficiently and this is all being done on a big computer wall with, I have to say, the worst user interface or user experience you could possibly imagine every time you try and do everything, it bleeps up at you. And I'm just thinking about working with this thing. And I would kill myself, minute one.

It's very bad. Yeah. Yeah. The robbers do the same thing they do in the original and that they stop the train, they separate the front car and move it away from the rest of the thing. Denzel Washington's calling him like Pelham 123, come in, come in, whatever. He also knows the guy who's meant to be driving Pelham, one, two, three. Jerry, calls him by name.

Yeah, Jerry, who we see as being held at gunpoint by John Travolta, who is like making small talk with him. He's like, are you from Brooklyn? Are you Irish for some reason? Because that's one of the, like, noble ethnicities, I guess. Yeah, he has a real list of ethnicities in this movie. He does. But then we can see the difference between a plainclothes officer now versus back during the

70s. The plane-clothes officer in the first movie, they wait until the very end. This guy, second one-minute-one stands up with the gun and just immediately gets himself shot. Gets clapped by one of the Niko-Belix. The Nika-Belix do something really clever because as the passenger cars are moving, as the kind of rear cars of the train are moving backwards, the plane-clothes cop approaches them. And one of the Nika-Belik says to go, is like, okay, when I say stop, hit stop hard. And then when the cop draws his gun, they stop it, they make him stumble. And then Nico-Belic just uses the opportunity to blow him a wall. It's very clever.

Effiless. Very, very clever. I like this. They make some other changes too. Like they're a bit stealthier about it to begin with. Ramas has like a fake police badge that he uses for a second. And he was like, oh, okay, so this isn't, this is pleasing to us, a sort of minority audience of people who watched the like original twice in quick succession under quite frustrating

circumstances. It's nice to know that we're not just watching the same movie again, you know? Yeah, you can tell the writer's been given the note, okay, like, punch it up, you know? And it works. It just really does. I think this writer ended up winning an Academy Award for something else that he wrote. But, like, it's a very well-written script. Yeah, some of the dialogue is really quite good.

It's the direction's a little uneven. And also, I think, some of the acting here, because this is where we get our first Travolta sort of, like, debut. And he's trying to sell guys. who's tweaking a bit, guy who's losing it, the high-energy psychopath kind of thing. It works later on in the movie, but at the start, before you've kind of eased into, oh, he just talks like this the whole time, huh? It's sort of giving an unironic version of Tom Cruise in Tropic Thunder.

A little bit, right? A little bit, but I like it. Yeah. He's making a point of swearing as much as humanly possible, if anything. Yeah. Yeah. Which, you know, it's fine. It's good.

Yeah, it's good. up Denzel Washington and he's like, I want $526,315 and $79 for every single hostage I've taken. It makes him do the mass and he's like, that's $10 million in one cent. And he's like, that's right, motherfucker. That's your broker's fee. Call the fucking mayor right now, motherfucker. It is cute. It is cute.

You got one hour before I start killing hostages. He's tipping his hand way too much already because he's talking about the hostages as commodities and he's saying it's a spot trade, it's not a futures trade. He's using as much Wall Street lingo as possible in this movie. Yeah. There are moments here where this is so Tom Cruise from Travolta that I do wonder if they wanted Tom Cruise for this, right? Like it's...

Maybe. But then if they did, it's not like John Travolta would have known that. No. And I mean, the other thing is we do eventually get in real life a Tom Cruise like action villain role in collateral, which was fantastic in. And when I make that connection, I can't help but kind of like substitute back. So I don't know. But so I like this, right?

We get the same dynamic. But we, I'm trying to think what I want to say here, because there are some differences in like the sort of meat and potato stuff, like how they shoot evacuating the passengers, they're not taking hostage from the train, where it's a lot more professional and it's a lot more mechanical. I think the 70s one found a lot of its heart in the idea that everyone involved in making New York City run is kind of a slob and doesn't necessarily always know what they're doing and it's kind of like run down. Whereas here post 9-11, it feels like all of the cop stuff and all of the train stuff has to work broadly quite smoothly. Yes, and there's a very interesting change they made one of the cops later on that I'm going to flag up that I think as a post-nobes. 9-11 moment. Yes, I think that's absolutely. But you're right.

It's very, very slick, and it's much more competent than the 70s version. At this point, we cut to the mayor of New York City. Oh, my God. And this is a fantastic gag, because it's James Gambley. Yeah. Yes, that's my boy. Very, very funny. And he's like, I'm going to be out of this job in nine months.

I don't give a shit. I hate riding the subway. I hate barbecues. I hate Christmas. I hate trains. I don't want to do this fucking shitty job. more. Notably, he's on a subway car as he's saying all of this, just presumably around his constituents being like, I hate my fucking job as mayor of New York.

I mean, that's pretty relatable. I would maybe feel, if I didn't like my mayor and I ran into one on the train being like, oh, I fucking suck being just in-eared shot. It's all right, man, don't worry, it's fine. I really want to see, I really want to see the Marvel Cinematic Universe taking a Pellon one, two, three, where the mayor is Kingpin. It's really good because it's not like the Marvel Super-Hury team could fucking do anything about any of this. It would just be really fun to have Spider-Man stunning around me. Like, well, shit, I don't know. I can't do anything about this.

They can't take on the mayor. You can't fight City Hall, baby. Yeah. Somebody called Nightcrawler, like. Yeah. We also do something that I don't think you can do, but I really want to try, which is get past the turnstiles on the subway by shouting mayor's office like you're the cops. That's pretty good. As his staff has come in.

I hope that Zoran's guys are doing that. Oh, God, yeah. They better be. Absolutely. Mayor shit. Man shit. A mayoral business. Yeah, for some reason his aides come into the train and then just say to him like really

loudly, there's been a hostage situation on a train. Like, they just blast it out to everyone in that. Just in public. Yeah. I don't know why. But. Yeah. And like to just get him out of the movie for like 20 minutes, he goes, all right, we'll ride the

train to another location and then we'll pick this back up again later. This guy has to love subway stuff. It's like, but we've got the cooperation of the MTA, so we're going to use it, and we're going to shoot this bit in a subway car for some reason. A lot of the characters love the subway. I know the reason, because you don't need a permit to shoot on the subway. Oh, magical. You also don't need to rent out filming location and put James Galdapini in it.

You can put him in a makeup truck and do his hair and makeup in the truck, and then I just put him on the subway car and come of that. You could literally just give me a, like, a completely bare room with a drop ceiling and say, Gracie Mansion. And I would go, yep, you got it. I'm not going to question that. But whatever. I guess it lends some, like, dynamism maybe makes New York City a character in the movie or something.

Yeah, he's on the train. He has a moment where they're like, the aides are like, we're going to go express and not make any of the stops. And people on the train complain. And he goes, I'm the mayor. We're going to make the stops, you know. Yeah, because the subway is so. So fast that we'll still make it faster than we would driving even with lights and sirens,

which- He really loves the subway more than Jared did. Anyway, Danza Washington's colleagues are already setting him up to take the fall for this going wrong. And as he's chatting to John Travolta, we get this interesting exchange where Danza Washington is like, look, man, I just answer the phones, you know, what do you want? Like, are you terrorists? And he's like, do I sound like a terrorist? He's like, I don't know, I've never talked to terrorists. I don't know what the fuck's going on, right?

And Delta Washington tells him, look, the cops are going to be there soon, you're sitting in the fucking cab, the driver's cab, they're going to see you and they're going to shoot you. And John Travolta has this thing where he says, we all owe God a death. Like he doesn't care whether he lives or dies, which is an interesting characterization. Hmm. Here's some more of my backstory. Please don't bully me with this information. He does keep blasting his backstory out on the radio.

Yeah, it's not as deaf as the like coughing bit from the original. but it's trying to do something else. When I sort of do the comparison, it's not always a criticism, right? I appreciate that it doesn't have to be the same movie. I think it's nice that it's a character-driven kind of perspective on that, because as John Travolta says, he's opening up, he's saying a lot, and he's blabbing a lot on the radio. And as he says to Deslinay Watch, he says,

you might be the last friend I ever make. And we get this really interesting insight that, like, oh, this guy is, like, kind of fucked up. He's not like a slick English fruitcake professional. He's like kind of on the edge here in a way that I really like. Yeah, he's crashing up. A little bit, a little bit sort of coked up, a little bit like, although not textually, but whatever. And as Garbera's telling him about, you know, the fact that he could be killed sitting in this cab, he's, I think he says it's kind of like a confessional.

He does. He does, yeah. And sort of heavily drops with like the weight of an anchor, by the way this guy is Catholic. That's, that's... Religion season will not end. They just keep putting it in the movies. Turns out, yeah. And his idea of being a Catholic is, a good Catholic knows that nobody is innocent, right?

A good Catholic would have no problem with taking hostages and killing them and things like this. Really, really funny perspective to put in your... Is that true? It's... I don't know. I don't know, but it's just like, yeah, these guys probably fine with hijacking trains, I guess. Yeah, if you're a Pope, write in.

Meanwhile, the hostage negotiation team. If you're the anti-Pope, don't write in, we're sick of hearing from you. Meanwhile, the hostage negotiation team from the NYPD have arrived in MTA control room, and it's fucking John Titoro. Oh, guy, I love to see. He's fantastic. He's fantastic. He's really, really good in this.

He's really really good in this. Like, genuinely, he locks in in this. He's, so he's this, like, NYPD lieutenant. He's on the, like, hostage negotiation team. And got this kind of really, like, reserved, confident, quiet manner that is, it's like, it's really believable. It's really, really nice. Yeah, he comes in and basically just, like, sits down, like, takes, takes Garba's place, and, like, immediately Garber is dismissed by his boss. This is, yeah.

This is a rapport building, motherfucker, because he does go through all the stuff that Garber's learned, right? Because he's been writing this down. Yeah, just flies the best of course. It's like Catholic, why do you think he's Catholic? Did he ask for a priest? No goods, which I like. This is well-written stuff. At this point, though, I do-

The camera is, of course, spinning around them as they taught me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's all going at the sort of different handcrank speed. Just slapping you in the face as you're trying to watch the movie. And we do get another little shot of, of, of. Travolta in the tunnel and I'm afraid I, I crispened potato snacks the movie at this point because... Oh no.

The one we've watched twice before? Yeah. They make another change for the sake of making a change. And he's like typing on a little laptop or like setting up some like Wi-Fi type bullshit or whatever trying to connect to like E, BT, Wi-Fi X down there. Yeah. The fucking internet's going to be in the movie. Yeah, yeah, it is.

But I also go, oh, it's going to be some... I think I wrote down here verbatim some diehard bullshit about the economy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We see them hook into the Dow Jones and you're like, alright. It's sort of the moment at which they decided that the hostages weren't enough. And I feel like it kind of lacks confidence in its premise to make that decision, you know? It's like... I like it because, well, I think it...

I wonder whether this was a deliberate thing after 2008 or whether this was a coincidence. But I think after, well, the timeline that movies get written and produced on, I reckon the first draft of this must have been written pre the financial crash. In which case, it's just, like, quite timely. People felt like it was coming. Like, we all know AI is going to crash now, right? Like, there are people in before the crash thinking about it, I guess. But yeah, no, you're right. It would have had to be before.

Subscribe to the podcast with gold because it will hold its value. Yeah, five gold bars a month. But so they send, they send. Send Garber home, or rather his asshole boss does. And John Travolta is immediately like, no, bring back Denzel Washington, or I am going to fucking kill the driver. And John Totura is like, oh, now, hang on a minute, there's no need to be doing that. We're all going to be...

He's doing the calm voice stuff. I'm John Totura, and I'm the new host of the podcast that you're listening to now. I'm going to explain to you why that's not in your best interest, and then just gunshot, gunshot, gunshot. And you do the slow hand crank thing again, where he just like zooms it on his face, and again, actually works here. That one shot works as John Totura is like, oh, I've fucked it, haven't you could see.

This is the one thing we don't want to happen. That's how Tony Scott used it in Man on Fire, right? Is where Denzo Washington and that, when his character was having this kind of emotional turmoil, right? And so I thought that Tony Scott knew what he was doing, but apparently he was just playing battleship here and just going, yeah, just do it a bunch of times, see if it hit. because a lot of the time they do it for no reason.

We get some more really nice characterization from John Travolta's cut, like, John Travolta too, because he's like, immediately apologetic about this. Before he shoots the motorman, he says, you were always going to be the first man, kills him. After he kills him, he says, I didn't kill him, the city of New York killed him. You guys killed him by not doing what I told you to do. You can see that he's like, on a moral crusade here. He thinks of himself as being morally righteous, and he just justifies everything that he wants to do. Yeah.

constant cokehead d'arvo. It's beautiful. And when Garba gets back on the phone and learns that the guy's been shot, one of the things that he says to him is, don't you ever, ever leave me again? I like this angle. It's like, oh, this guy's codependent. I really like playing this up. They've made a bunch of changes, but like putting way more emphasis on the conversations between these two, really like it. Yeah, and how intimate that is, right? Like, it's sort of, I'm just, I'm just a bunch of There was a lot that was kind of unspoken. Yeah, there was a lot that was unspoken in the 70s one, whereas, you know, it was fun and it was funny, but it was broadly professional, right?

You didn't think that Walter Mato and Robert Shaw wanted to fuck each other, whereas here they're kind of leaning into that a little bit, and I really like that. Yeah, they do. It's good. You could believe it. Meanwhile, the mayor and his aid was like, well, I guess, are we going to send them the 10 million? And the mayor's like, why 10 million? Why specifically 10? You know, why not 19?

a million for every hostage. And the mayor's aide is like, oh, well, there's actually the maximum that your office is allowed to request without having to fill out a bunch of forms in bullshit. And James Garnelfini is like, really? How did they know that? I didn't even know that. Yeah. Weirdly specific.

Interesting. Okay, well, tell them we'll pay. Gantafin here is playing a kind of like, I described as Rudy W. Bushliani here. A little bit. It's very like 2000s on the one hand. But it's also, I mean, we'll sort of get into more of this characterization later. It's a little bit on the nerdier side. Also, we see the cops, we see SWAT like infiltrating the subway tunnel.

And again, they kind of can't help but make the cops look cool and tactical. It's interesting because in the original, they really mine this idea that like the cops are kind of lunch pale, right? They're like, it's the kind of New York City working class thing. Irrespective of the actual truth of that, that's how they want to depict it. Whereas here it's just like, oh yeah, of course. Of course the NYPD has like the world-class post-9-11 SWAT team. It's not like a bunch of guys who just happen to have the like shotguns or whatever. And it's, I don't know, it's that much smoother.

And I think it sort of takes something from that, take something from the sense of place, maybe. We then get this really interesting being. where John Titoro begins to question, Denzel Washington is like, so how come you were on this desk when he called, do you always sit at this desk? Do you know this man? Why does he specifically want to talk to you?

And we get this not necessarily, he's not a Zenergaata moding because he doesn't have a personal mistake in it, but he's like, a professional suspicion. He's like, you know, I'm just going through all the motions here. Like, could we perhaps search your house? And Denzel Washington's like, yeah, I guess. And we can see that he's got something to hide as well.

And again, this is like really, really nicely written that we are now revealing more about our protagonist, Danzo Washington, and beginning to question his side of things. They reveal something a bit more than I think that perhaps they might at this point, because the reason why John Tertour is like interrogating him is because his boss has tipped him off, right? And we initially see that from like the other side of the glass, no audible dialogue as to what he's saying, and then we cut to the other side of the glass where they just say it, right? where it's like, oh, this guy, he's like, he was, you know, used to be assistant director,

we demoted him to this desk while he's under investigation for taking a bribe, right? They basically like, introduce and sort this whole thing out in the course of like three scenes, just one after the other. Yeah, yeah. It doesn't sort of let you hold that tension for very long. Also, because they have internet down there, Travolta and the Moteman that he's got, Ramos. I'll just like on a laptop Googling all of the stuff that they're hearing about this guy like, oh, it's crazy.

They just type this shit into fucking Google and like the AI overview is just like, a train is a kind of long vehicle. I'm like, yeah, yeah, I don't fucking... No. Minus AI. Before 2022. I really, really like the dynamic

of interrogating Garber here and that kind of suspicion. But then down in the tunnel, as opposed to the kind of nice tent, intra-cru dynamics that you have of feeling like Robert Shaw has to like manage these guys, it's kind of just Travolta on a laptop. And we see that as he's on the laptop,

he is being cited up by like an NYPD sniper. Who we see, who we spent time with. We do. We spend time with this guy, and that's going to be unfortunate a moment. But John Travolta, he gets on the blowout to Johnson, he's like, hey man, this bribery thing, Did you do it? And Downs on Washington is like, no, I didn't do it. I didn't take a bribe.

And he's like, well, why have you been demoted? They're just hounding you. And John Travolta like sympathizes with him. He's like, they're always shitting on the little guy. You made a mistake one time and they fucking jumped down your throat about it. And he's like, but no, just tell me how you did it. Tell me how you did it. It doesn't do it, I didn't really do it.

And he's like, okay, man, if you don't tell me how you did it, I'm going to shoot Charlie Kirk in the face. I'm gonna kill this kid. Why is Charlie Kirk there? He's live streaming. The kid who was sexting his girlfriend does low-key look kind of Kirkish. He is, he is Curcular, yeah. He's low-cur-canu-canually, curkular.

Loke-genu-Gernally. He's like, and by the way, because they've restored the internet connection to a train car, his live stream with his girlfriend has like started back up again, and the laptop is under one of the chairs. Yeah, so like she can see what's going on there. Yeah. But so, we see that Denzel is like, uh, The Garber is being forced into admitting this while John Totoro's character, while the NYPD is there with like notepad out, right? Multiple cops all around him in the round.

All of his colleagues are like listening as well. So here's the thing. Not to be like, oh, this movie doesn't get the law right because getting the law right is boring and difficult and it's not the important thing. But what I kind of thought for a second that this movie might be doing, given that. this is like he's holding someone at gunpoint and the whole procedural thing, you would think any confession that Garber makes here would be inadmissible, right? Like, surely. And so I kind of figured for a second, but his colleagues aren't going to want to work with him out of that. I know, but I still kind of figure it's like, like, uh, Ryder Travolta's character kind of giving him a bit of a golden

ticket here, you know, but instead it is very much like, no, as he admits to this, it's just like, oh, his colleagues lose all respect for him and the NYPD just like arrest this guy later in the night pants. You have lost respect with the MTA faction. Yeah. When he admits to it, it genuinely everyone in the room is like, he should have done it. It's good that he did it. They're all just kind of like, I get it.

Yeah. There's a bit where it turns because they're initially all like, feel betrayed by him. But then he gets, you know, he's still holding Charlie Kirk at gunpoint. And he's like, but why? What do you spend it on? And he says, I spent it on college tuition for my two girls. We get some like soft strings. And then the MTA guys are like, actually he was right to do it.

And it wasn't even that bad. Free my man. He didn't do shit, et cetera, et cetera. What he did is that he was one of the guys who was in charge of picking what the next big train is. And he went to the big train convention out of Japan and saw a cool Japanese train. And he was going to pick it anyway, but then they were like, we'll give you money if you pick our train. And he went, that's free money, baby. Yeah.

I'm going to use that for my daughters. Going to get paid for doing something I was going to do anyway. And he took it. And also, I need to mention this because I'm probably going to make it the episode. There is a bit where Charlie Kirk is being held at gunpoint here, where John Romero is on the line to Garba being like, you have five seconds before I kill this kid. And Charlie does the white, my face, he does the white person face for just a second. It's a micro-expression we all have access to. It's available to us at any time.

White people when you're in a hostage situation and you're about to kill them. It looks like he's gonna call the manager of hostage situation. It's really, really good. But it's Barry 2009 that the amount of money Denzel Washington was going to spend on college tuition for two people is $5,000. I'm like, yeah, man, that'll get them like, maybe one. You're a city employee, you've got like crazy benefits, man. Like you don't... So funny.

Also, one of the other things, like, so there's a dynamic here that this scene could do and chooses not to. And I think one of the reasons why I choose is not to is the kind of soft strings, right? He's... So Ryder, Travolta is kind of like, ranting about how, you know, the MTA, they didn't just, you know, demote you, they humiliated you. It's like he's the one humiliating him, right? He's the one making him admit to having committed the crime in front of all of his colleagues.

It's like, and also Danza Washington is really good at playing a character who is being humiliated and destroyed by guilt, right? We have to watch flight at some point. But it doesn't really kind of explore that tension as much as it might do. And I think that's a real shame. I love this thing. I got to disagree with you. I love this scene because I love that John Devon is like, you see, man, we're not the bad guys.

We're doing the right thing here. We're just the little guy trying to make it right for us. It's really nice. That kind of ambiguity would be a really interesting thing to explore, but then they put the kind of heroic music over it, and it hits me a little bit like the kind of, you know, the meme about watching Scarface with the intended emotion counter on the screen. Yeah, right. The thumbs on the scale a little bit here. Yeah. Yeah.

We do have to talk about the weird pissed scene. The author's thingly disguised anxiety. Yeah. Yeah. Well, one of the hostages is like, I got a piss. And so John Travolta makes him like pee out of the door, but he's pee shy and he can't do it. And then like a little kid does instead. Yeah.

And they go, that kid's going places. Weird, like piss shot as well. Odd. Yeah. Like, you see the kid piss. I don't know why we needed to see that. Why didn't you need to see that? Yeah. I don't know.

And the guy is just like some yuppie, and it's not making really a kind of broader point here. It's also one of the other things is the original one spends a lot of time with the hostages, right? With the hostages, right? Okay, they're all archetypes, right? And they're all kind of broadly drawn. But it really tries to do the like New York City, where's like it? You know, everyone's different, right? Here it's like, New York City, we've got all the people. We've got a guy who needs to piss.

We got a kid who can piss. We got the cowboy brothers who don't have any lines. They're just hugging each other. They're reassuring each other. They're like, I love you, brother. We got woman and we got troop. Broke back mountain, yeah. Yeah, we got Charlie Kirk.

And Charlie Kirk, by the way, who we get a couple of different, we got a couple of different hostage scenes. We'll go through him in a little. One of the Kirk ones is that he sees that his girlfriend is back on the live stream and goes, holy shit, start streaming this on our website. She sets that up. That kid, by the way, if this was real life, that kid would be, have the most catastrophic right-wing turn you've ever seen in. Oh, my God.

Absolutely. It'd be the kid from fucking Eddington, straight away. This kid looking like 30 years older, talking about what Zoran's doing to New York City. Like, getting of it Jowley and middle age. A hostage survivor. Charlie Kirk. I don't know what the name of the guy is. Gio something, because he's Italian.

G.G. Kirk. They agree to pay the ransom, and we do the, like, uh, transport the money by car thing from the first movie. The movie keeps like slapping me in the face. Stop it, I'm trying to watch you, stop it. They love the cops so much. Oh yeah, yeah, way more. The shots of them driving is just like, whoa, the fucking cops are coming.

Like, whoa, it's cool. Like they slam into a yellow cab and send it flying and just keep going, and it's unexamined. It's like, yeah, the cops are coming through, baby. Why wouldn't you move the money with a helicopter now that the NYPD has infinity dollars post 9-11? That's a great question. We need to move Garber with the helicopter later on. Yeah, yeah, we do. The movie does stop and ask this later on, and it's quite a funny moment when the mayor

is like, why didn't we use a helicopter and then they just go, oh, shit, we should have done that. And it's a nice moment of like, oh, we're fucked up. Real sorcerer moment, we're like, why can't we use a helicopter? Oh, fuck, we shouldn't use that. Yeah, I actually really like that as a way out of it, right? Because I think I do want to hold to my initial criticism, which is that as a screenwriter, getting to the realization and going, well, I write the realization in, and now I can't write my way out of it. But the way that they solve that is to just lean into it as a joke, just like, oh, these guys are actually stupid enough that they just thought, yeah, we just put the money in a car and drive it.

I know, like under stress and they've already started the one thing, yeah, it's nice, yeah. They are crashing though, on the way over. Like one of these motorbikes comes over and everything. This movie really likes the NYPD bikes as well. It does. Yeah, it does. At one point in the course of this, they use a shot from Google Earth, like fucking pretty good. It's, I don't know what business it has being in there.

Huh. Meanwhile, back in hostage situation, there's a lady who says to a guy sitting on a guy sitting on like, we should be like the people on Flight United 93, we should band together and take over the hospital. And then the guy's like, why are you asking me? Because I'm like a tough looking black guy, and she's like, no, because you have a troop ring. And my husband had one too. And I'm a military widow and my husband was good and he had a troop ring. And he's like, yeah.

Awesome, 2009 moment. What are you racist? No, I respect the troops. And then it just moves on. 45 minutes in and we're gonna solve racism and support the troops. magical. When the mayor arrives at the MTA headquarters, all the reporters outside are asking

him about his divorce? Are you getting divorced? Were you having an affair? And he's like, I'm not talking about this. Fuck you. And this is set up to a really nice moment later on. Yeah. I love the journalist who pivots from, hey, how's 9-11-2 going to? And how's your divorce going? Getting the real stories. Yeah. So we may as well just get that nice moment later on because

people keep hounding the mayor about he had an affair and stuff and then like He mentions this one piece, like, people keep asking me about this fucking affair. And then his aides just go, was she worth it, man? And he just goes, yes! It's a really like that. It's a really good Gandalfini delivery. He has a couple like this where it's just like instinctive without thinking.

First of all, this man is a king. This man is a line. I don't care what party I would vote for this man. But yeah, just to be like, was she worth it? Yes. Obviously. That's my mayor. That's my mayor.

That's my hero. He gets another really funny moment later on where Joe Walshito and he'll ask him at the end, like, do you like the Yankees? And he goes, no. I mean, well, I mean, obviously, yeah. It's really good. This is a subtle reference to the fact that supporting the Yankees makes you a bad person. So the thing is, right, as they're trying to deliver the money, as the mayor comes in,

they get the TV on. Yes. The TV has gotten access to the stream, right? And I really like that by contrast with the first one where everyone's trying to work out who the like driver they have. They, he walks past and everybody recognizes that motherfucker. The thing is, the whole way through this guy has been wearing like sunglasses, a big fake, like nose pad and a hat. And he steps onto the screen for like one second and everyone under control bath goes, oh fuck, it's Ramos.

I know that guy. Oh shit. Yeah. Yeah. He did time a few years ago for Mansloat. He drove a train whilst high on cough syrup and killed some pedestrians. And then the cops to me just like, like, find this man's age, sex, location, known associates, butthole dimensions, like, get everything, like, what kind of dilated is he

used? Like, get all of it. Give me some... Give me the man on the street. Give me the eyes on the street. So, Tatar takes, uh, takes Denzhenso Washington's character aside, and tries to, like, teach him a little bit about how to negotiate hostagely. And I actually really like this scene, where he says, we're like rodeo clowns, you know? It's like...

It's about like delaying and deflection and trying to like trick the bull so that he can't kill a cowboy. And I'm really sort of fond of this delivery as well. Pretty good. Yeah. Meanwhile, down in the tunnel, we see the NYPD sniper again just to humanize him a bit more. And I do, the one NYPD detail I've liked so far, the one cop detail here is him sighted. up Travolta as he's talking on the thing and saying to himself, please let it be me who shoots this guy, which I like, I like the kind of bloodthirst there. That's a bit more humanizing,

I guess, than some of the other stuff has been. But so, Travolta makes him get the mayor on the phone. The mayor gets on the blower. He got internet down there. He's seen the mayor walk into the thing. He's like, you're the mayor of there? Can I talk to the mayor? Against everyone's advice, goes, yeah, I'll talk to him. Just sits down on it. And he humiliates him again. Yeah, he does.

I like that this is a sort of thing that he is capable of doing. He makes him an offer that he can't accept, like that classic movie, The Godfatherant. Yeah. Where he says... Watching the Godfather backwards. Yeah, I will... You walk away from me on the day of my daughter's wedding. And give me back a favor?

Back out of the room on the day on which my daughter is supposed to be shoved up my wife's pussy. How dare you? The morning after, my son got ambushed by a bunch of guys who sucked all of those bullets out of his body and then pushed his car away from that tallberry. Thank God they were there with those bullet vacuums. I wish I could join in on this, but I've never seen the godfather forwards all that. Look what they undone to my boy. I had to walk down the street and take it orange out of my pocket and put it on a fruit store where it belongs. And then I got on the boat back to Italy.

Ah, a lovely nap with my grandchildren in the garden. I'm gonna walk around. Oh, let's get out of here. Putting that horse's head back onto a horse. Michael Corleone orders the life-saving bullet removal surgery of all of his enemies, and then in celebration, baptizes. Godson. Unbaptises his godson.

Damns his godsome. Yeah, it's a real like sort of contrapuntal thing where all the good stuff he's doing by saving these gangsters is offset by him damning this godson. Stand down, stand down. So in a turn to you now. All right, we gotta get on with this podcast. This is why we do this, right. This is what we're here for, baby. He makes him an offer he can't.

to accept, which is, I will trade you for all of the hostages. And I like James Gandalfini playing a guy who's a pussy. I love it. We, I miss that guy so badly. He was an incredible actor because he really sells this. Yeah, yeah. Just him does tragically, like, because he does this fantastically of just, he gets off the thing, every cop is like telling him, yeah, like, obviously don't do this, but you still

see him like, it stings, right? He can't do it. Everyone in a room is going, you have to say no to this, but he hates the fact that he has to say it, really good. Yeah, yeah. And of course, we see that sadistically, writer is like, you know, I knew you wouldn't do it, I just wanted to hear you say it. And I wouldn't offer you that deal in a million years.

Because he says, you're so corrupt. Everyone in the city hates you. They'd be happy if I fucking shot you in the head. And he starts going off, like, Garba, can you believe these guys? You believe how corrupt they are. These are the guys who were shitting on you and me, Garba. It's really, really nice. He's like fucking going off, right?

And Garba tries to calm him down by asking about Phil Ramos. He's like, so tell me about Phil Ramos, you know, did you meet him in prison? And John Travolta's like, oh, oh, you figured out that I went to prison. All right. Let me tell you my entire fucking backstory here. Yeah. And I thought we were going to do a reveal that this story turned out to be bullshit, but it does actually turn out to be true.

He's like, look, man, when I, back when I was doing my old job, I took this model on a trip to Iceland. And then she was an ass model, by the way. She did ass models for jeans. And we were going like a husky dog sled thing. And this dog was running on the sled and it's shit. And then the shit hit me. And Denzow Washington is like, why is that a significant memory for you?

He was like, well, later on when I was in prison, I couldn't shit. Like, because it didn't have any privacy in my cell and I was too scared. But then I thought about that dog. And that really helped. You know, the dog does what it does, needs to do to survive, and that really helped me when I was in prison. And again, the screenwriter's like thing about not being able to piss or shit, okay. Yeah, it's a weird thing. But the actual dialogue here is really, really good.

Like, it's, it kind of snaps. Like, the ass model bit is funny. Admittedly, like, if I hear the phrase, yeah, I'm taking an ass model to Iceland to see the club scene there, I think, oh, I've been texted by Abby again. but, you know, it's a good story. I am trying to turn over a new leaf. Okay? That's fine. I'm in therapy now.

I'm trying to seek more intentional, more intentional, more intentional romantic connections with fewer ass models. Like, I'm trying to be, I'm trying to be better about that kind of thing now. So hopefully you'll get fewer texts and you'll be like, I'm going to Iceland with my wife. Yes, that's the goal. Oh, that's lovely. You know, by the way, you know that Tony's. Scott was fucking biting like his fingernails and clawing at the walls, because there's not

much room to rotate the camera in the train tunnel, but he's doing as much as he can. It's like panning kind of back of the walls. We also see some more gay shit in that as soon as he gets off the radio, Yeah. Boo. Travolta's talking to Dorares about how sexy Denzo Washington's voice is, which, okay, true, but... Yeah, he goes, he could be my bitch in prison. Which again, just...

Yeah, when they eventually come face to face later on, I smell John Travolta's like, damn, you're good-looking. And he's like, I am Denzel Washington, yes, yes? That boy's good looking tall too. Nice. The cops are driving this money across town. God. At which point we have to base boom EMT supremacy.

A gigantic American truck-sized ambulance says, fuck the police. We're a real emergency service. T-bones it from the side, flips it 100. thousand million feet into the air. Like fucking Dom Torreto's prison van. That's the anti-ambulence, the ambulance that hurts you. I'm still watching Tom Walker's GTA streams, and it's like one of those. Me too.

The ambulance... It just goes out, like crashes. It's the Wambulence. Like, they're just dead. Both cops are dead. Whatever, we're done. Move on. No, actually, they're not, explicitly shows us they're both alive.

They both get out of the company. Oh, oh, we're cops, we're heroes. Don Torretto, for sure. Whatever. Yeah, they've had the other than we've got to have the cool bikes, right? They load the money onto the cool bikes and we get... We really start fucking with the camera as we're filming these bikes. It's like, hey, do you wanna feel disoriented?

Because like, I do. And they do the thing in the original where they tell Deso and Washington, just lie and tell him the money's there. It's not Denzel that has the idea this time, because they're running into the same problem, which is there's been a crash, the money isn't here, the time is up, what do we do? And someone in the room is like, just lie to him. But we see down there that they have the security camera footage of the entrance to the tunnel. So they know that the money hasn't got here.

And they do, they choose to lie. So he does lie to him. And John Topold is like, you fucking lie. I thought we were on the same team. You betrayed me. Right. Now someone's going to die. And he chooses a hostage.

We see him choose a hostage at random. And then the troops. In fact, he chooses the lady. He chooses the lady. His husband is dead. But then the troops. The troops are so fucking. powerful and important.

The troops guy, like, puts himself in front of the gun as like, shoot me instead, which he does. Oh, beautiful boys. And we know that he does because it's being live streamed and aired on live TV, which, God damn, okay, sure, I guess, would like- You don't want to put a broadcast delay on that? Maybe not, maybe American TV is just like fully live leak piled at this point, which- Yeah, I think so.

That's what Nightcrawls is about. Pretty certain. Yeah. Yeah. Great film. Incidentally, our sniper outside, we've had like three different shots of him loading this rifle, by the way. Be like, oh, I really want to do it. We like see his finger on the trigger a bunch.

I hate this, yeah. We see a rat. But it's not his fault. Go up his, like, trouser and bite him and he fires and he kills the driver. And it all panes when he breaks loose. But we not only see, we hear him. say, oh, a rat made me do an accidental discharge. And this is something that happened in the last one and is never explained at all in any way.

I think it's so, so much more effective like that. Even just give me the ambiguity. You can keep the line of like, oh, a rat made me do it. Just don't show it. Don't show the rat doing it. Yeah. That's what they mean when I say he was killed by the city of New York, like one of the rats fucking made it do it.

The rats, which comprise the real city of New York. Yeah. decided to pilot this cop Ratatooie style. Oh my God, swatatooie? Like, swat guy with fucking Remy under the helmet? Mrs. Frisbee and the Rats of Nim, motherfucker. You never know. If they've got a hat on there is a non-zero chance.

Because you're so lucky, right? If Remy is... You're so lucky that he wants to play cooking simulator, because if he wants to lock in and play Call of Juicy, right? All he has to do is go to like a police station or whatever, and you've got a rat cop, you know? Now I'm imagining that JK from JMiroquai has a whole kpara under there. That's good.

Entirely plausible. Doing the video for virtual insanity and the capabara is just like shifting under the hat. It's just just aura farming showing how good you can drive this guy. So... Thank God that they chose non-violence. As like a gunfighter, breaks out with the cops. Again, I would maybe stop airing this on live TV. I would too. Yeah.

But Denzel Washington gets on the phone to John Cholson. He's like, look, man, like, you got to calm down. They are going to fucking kill you. It doesn't matter if you get all the money. They're going to fucking shoot you dead and you can't take it with you. And so he's like, okay, I want you to deliver it in person. Come down and be in the climax of the movie with me. And he's like, okay. I really like the dialogue here again. A little bit I want to shout out is when he's talking about having a plan B about getting out, Garba says, you never see a U-Haul behind a hearth, which I like. Yeah, guys, the ancient Egyptians tried it.

You can't bring it with you, but it doesn't work. Yeah. It's farcals. It's good dialogue. John Chavala says, Plan B is enforcing plan A! Love that. Yeah, yeah. Really good.

It's a little bit too powerful me, but he does say, the minute you stop believing me, that's it, you know? But so the cops want to go in. Of course they do. And the mayor finds his spine. And we get some kind of real flag-fucking here because he's like, New York City doesn't have an acceptable casualty rate, which jerk off motion, fine, whatever. Sure, sure it doesn't.

We pay off the helicopter thing because like now, now they remember that they have helicopters. And I like that the movie acknowledges this. It's the only way out of that. If you don't- If you think that you don't have a backspace button in, you know, whatever you're using to write your screenplay, play, then I guess this is the only way out of it. Yeah, right. Oh, we could have done that.

Oh. Whoops. As they saw over the city, John Dutero is like, it's nice, isn't it? It reminds you what you're fighting for. It's like, ah, okay. Yeah, he talks to his wife on the phone and she gives him a reason to live. I like this too. Wives be doing this.

This is some really good shit. He gets on the phone to his wife and goes like, hey, just heads up, just got to go give the money to the terrorists that you've been reading about. Actually, he doesn't say terrorists. They have a kind of thing about not being terrorists, but he's on the blow. He's like, yeah, I just gotta go down there. Don't worry, I'm just delivering the money.

I'll be back later on. And she asked him like a hands gruever situation. To bring back a pint of milk. As like a sort of a symbolic, like, just, I'll bring that back on your way home, which means that you'll have to live through this. And a really beautiful little character moment. He argues, he's like, that's way too much milk. Are you insane?

I'm not going to remember half of a pint of milk. We're not going to use that milk. And I really, really like that. Yeah. It's like, I'm making a cheese sauce sauce. You have to be on top of your household milk situation, otherwise it's going to go bad. It's a wasted money. I know what you're doing, but it's been hot for like a couple of weeks now.

Like the milk is, we're not going to use it all. Yeah, it's like getting the sense of a really well-worn husband-wife argument where it's like, you get milk that you don't ever use. And then I have to like contrive a use for this milk or it just ends up going down the sink. It's just like fantastic. It like implies all this domesticity just from that. I really like it. Yeah, really, really good. Just to do more heterosexuality shit, Charlie Cook's goal.

friend is like, I love you and he's like, this is great. Oh, this, but no, I hate this bit. I hate this bit. No, no, it's great and as much as it gives me something to yell about. Girlfriends be like, say you love me back during a hostage situation. Literally, he's, he's like at gunpoint on the floor and she's going like, would you still love me if I was a worm? Why are you saying yes?

And it's not like he's, it's not like she's got the fucking steam status where she can see he's playing fucking Bellatro, right? Yeah, right. Like, he's in the situation, you know? Steam Seda says that he's in a hostage situation. Yeah. People, like, they're a terrorist walking back and forth above him, and she's just going, like, you gotta say you love me back, you know?

Yeah, and he goes like, I can't talk right now. I'm in a hostage situation, babe. And she's like, that was longer than just saying, yes, you should have just said yes. Like, do you know how many more words that is than saying, I love you? Why can't you just say I love you? Do you not love me? And now, at that point, I do take her side because he gets up and gets really close to it, and then just goes, I'm having a.

a really weird day right now. You could have said, I love you back at that point. Dump him, sweetie. The way he acted during that hostage situation gave me the ick. Get him out of here. I agree. Kick him to the curb. He is a narcissist.

He is gaslighting you. Anyway, dump him, sweetie. Yeah. Oh, and incidentally, the mayor solves the case. Like, we got a mayor detective here. Yeah. Yeah. It would be weird if I had a podcast about either of those two things.

Yeah, yeah. Because the markets are... crashing. And the mayor's aid is like, ah, if we'd known this was happening, we could have made a shit ton of money off this. And the mayor's like, wait a second. Wait a second. What kind of guy takes an ass model to Iceland? Yeah. That must be Abigail. No, no, no, no. It must be a Wall Street guy. No, I said guy, so it can't be Abby. It's got to be a Wall Street guy, you know? Yeah, use the identograph.

Mm-hmm. So, yeah, they just go like, oh, okay, the whole The hostages barely count. The money he's getting barely matters. He's just making it all on the pocket. He's shorting a bunch of shit. Solves the fucking case. So Garba has to go down with the money, and one of the cops, an ESU guy we haven't met before, hands him, uh, Waltha PPK, and then shows him how to take off the safety in a way that is wrong.

And confusing too, like... Bad description. I'm really pleased with myself to have just gone. caught this apropos of nothing, but when he shows him like, safety is off, the safety is on. And when he says, safety's on, safety is off. Annoying. Is the red dot... He hands him a wall for P.B.K. And does a...

Washington's like, that's a gay gun for women. Yeah, that's right. Well, don't worry, because it won't stay at all the PPK in between shots. And he's like... He finds out about it between them, he was like, oh, it's gay. Can sell that. Like a manly gun. Yeah, that's in the deleted scenes, you know, and the extended edition is the gay gun for women's scene. But it's hidden in...

in one of the bags of money. Because there's multiple bags of money now. We're talking 10 million. It's not just like one bag. He's got to put it on like one of them carts and bring it down the track. And at this point, they managed to ID Rider. Because like, oh, his real name is Dennis Ford. He ran a private equity fund and he siphoned cash.

He siphoned $20 million out of the city's pension fund and ended up doing nine years in prison for it. He's the only Wall Street banker ever to go to fucking. jail for doing crime shit. And they never found all the money. There was a couple million that they never recovered. And they're like, that's what he's used to be shorting the markets today. Mm-hmm. Yeah, he's putting on gold.

We can find his accounts. We see this, we see on his like little Sony laptop, we see him looking at the market. And it's like money down, gold up, like in as basic as terms as that. They're like, no, money not stonks, gold stonks. Gold stonks right now. And if you invested in gold when it was, when it was, okay, so the concept is if you invest in something when it's not stonks, then if stonks happens to it, then you can sell it and make money. Yeah, it's the old maxim. Buy not stonks, sell stocks. Yeah, I really want to do that there's a shirt or something.

You learn so much on this podcast. We're kind of multidisciplinary things, you know. Warren Buffett once said, when there's blood on the streets, stonks. Stonks. So, Trevolta, Trevolta sees Denton. Oh, my God. Immediately gay about it, which I can't have been easy for John Travolta to do convincingly, I don't think.

Yeah, he goes like, oh, you're, fuck, you're handsome, too. And you're pretty tall as well, nice. Now, hold on a second, the Scientologist throughout my door. I better go see what they want. Listen, John Travolta is just a man who, if he sees, like, an attractive, well-built young man at the gym. man at the gym will just come over and say hello and like, you know, congratulate him on a good workout. And there's nothing to say about that, really. So he makes...

A few hasn't done that in that time, you know? Well, exactly. Come on. That is a very American thing to do. They do do that. Yeah. No, it's true. It's a freak me to fuck out.

I can't be spoken to at the gym. No, no. That's my sort of monastic locking in time. I'm listening to kill James Bond. I'm on the fucking rowing machine, you know? You're not saying shit to me because I'm going to like back into you, you know? We do get a nice moment where John Travolcher turns like. Washington having this conversation in the train cab.

And it's quite tense as Denzel Washington looks around and notices the bullet hole and like Ramos's brains spat over the wall. And John Chavotte was like, oh yeah, yeah, sorry about that. Because he was the brains of the operation. Yeah. But he tells the cops, I want green lights all the way and Danza Washington's going to drive the train. And if you don't get me green lights all the way, if I say a single cop, I'm going to shoot

Danza Washington in the head. And then he's like, don't worry, man, I'm bluffing. I'm not really good. I love that. He looks over and then, he goes, I'm just saying shit, man, don't worry. I've just been saying shit the whole time. I don't know. Really, really good.

Something I dislike here, though, is as they do this scene, right? Kind of nothing else is going on in New York City. I liked that in the original, you had the sense that this whole hostage shaking was an interruption and an inconvenience to a city where a lot of stuff was going on all the time. People had places to beat. Yeah, Kaz Dahlowitz had a railroad to run, whereas, In this case, like, this is THE train, you know? I guess that's what the frenetic editing is trying to tell you.

I guess. They try to imply that this train is in, like, the safest tunnel humanly possible for it to be in early on. They go, like, oh, if you were to do it anywhere, it would be here to sort of imply that like, there are other tracks that can take the strain from this line, but I don't know how true that is. I wish you had a podcast with some co-host that could tell me, but I don't know. It's a shame.

Yeah. So they do the plot of the Takey Appellon, One-Two-3 in that they stop the train. Yeah, they use the Doohickey. They do it Doohickey to override the Devon Switch. Get off the train, they take Garba with them, and then they leave all the passengers just on the train, and then send it off down the tunnel to Coney Island. Yeah. Cool.

There's a bit where they're walking down the tracks, and the train drivers, who we know have radios, can see them. And that doesn't matter. That's actually really true. Fuck, I didn't think about that. Yeah, they passed by like a train. Yeah, just straight up aura farming, just walking. They also, and this is really important, don't change clothes.

No, no. They're just like... You don't peel off the shitty goatee. It's just real. No, that's real. It just looks like that, I guess. Crazy. Uh-huh.

There is a nice moment where Denzel Washington runs away after grabbing the hidden gun, and the others are like, ah, fuck it, leave him behind. behind. And there's a moment where Denzel Washington is like leaning against the wall watching them go. And he has this moment with himself where he like summons up his courage. And it's just almost like 10 seconds, but it's really, it's a great bit of acting first of all. And it's just really nice the filmmakers included that. Good storytelling that he's not just suddenly an MTA operator who knows how to use a gun and is a badass. Like he has to like find his courage for a moment. I really like that moment's in there. Yeah. Lovely. On the on the train, we see that Charlie Kirk has learned a

valuable lesson about telling your girlfriend you love her because he did. And this does take the position that like women are crazy, but you do have to tell us that you love us. You have to indulge us when we're being like this, which... Yeah, this is, there is a difference in the attitude towards women from the first movie. The first movie, they had just invented women like 10 minutes before they started filming and everyone was going, you heard about women now? Whereas at this point, we've settled into the current like women at work thing, which is like,

yeah, they'll be there. But you can kind of avoid it and minimize it as much as humanly possible. Yeah, everyone's kind of sick of women's shit at this point, which is like... Like, it's assumed that there will be women at work, but if you do it right, you can avoid them. Yeah. He tells Erica Kirk that he loves her. She is already being railed by JD Bands. On the return, this is firework.

Be a hundred percent real. Charlie would be on the Skype call with Candace Owens. Like, come on. He's like hanging up on his girlfriend to call Candace Owens. tell her that he loves her. Yeah, he's like, shit, the time travel's gone wrong, Candace. You gotta send me back. We do take the position that Candace is the worthy successor, by the way.

That's just on the split. They do try to shoot at Garver, and he's forced to pursue them at some distance. He pulls the gun, which has now changed into not a gay gun for women. Oh, wonderful. Into a gun that doesn't even have an external safety, it's fine. I'm just proud of myself for most. Little known fact that if you put a gun in a bag of money, the gun grows. Oh, yeah.

Oh, this is why you've got to focus on, like, you know, grinding, you know. Yeah, that's why military budgets are so big. Absolutely. The train runs into the, like, red lights and stops, and we pay off the inexplicable piss scene because the yuppie who couldn't piss earlier goes, I really got to take that piss. That's like the final line of it, like, as well, as we spend with the hostages. any of the hostages, like, ah, time-fuss.

I think we could also, at this point, engage in one of our favorite activities on this show, which is telling you things that are categorically false over the internet. If you are a man and you are P-Shai, you are a transgender woman. Yeah, real, actually. Yeah. That is, 100%. Yeah. Hmm.

Okay. Yeah. No. Take that. No, absolutely. So they figure out where they're getting out of the subway, right? which is a tunnel under the Waldorf Astoria. Yeah, a Roosevelt spur. Yeah, we don't get the Mr. Blue, Mr. Brown, Mr. Gray, Mr. Green thing. They're not shooting at each other.

He just gives the two Nico Belichs like a firm handshake. Well, not a firm handshake. Gives them a weak handshake. And they walk out. The two Nikos. I love the Nicos. They don't change their clothes at all. They just walk straight down the street with the money.

Just like in the tracksuits. And the cops are on them. You've been live streamed, boys. Yeah. The cops. are on them immediately, and we get some frankly beautiful 80s Hong Kong-level squib work. I was going to say, oh, my God. Lovely work from the special effects and makeup department.

Oh, incredibly fascist. Really bizarre scene that leads up to it, because everyone just, everyone just, all the cops just park around them and you kind of see one of them just look at the other and go, do you want to, do you want to die? All right, just start shooting and then bat, bap, bap, bap, bap, like, they're flying everywhere, they're There's so many scoves going off. It's fantastic. It looks.

It looks so good. We used to just kill people to be, to, like, CGI fucking sick of it. Go back to balloons full of stageblood, like, because this looks like, everything is incredible. Oh. Yeah, that's why on House of the Dragon, we do like the real blood and the squibs and the squirting and stuff, because it does, it looks better. It looks good.

It looks better. It's just magical, yeah. But so Trevolta gets away. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He gets in a cab. He opens up his Sony laptop. And his laptop is like, hey man, stonks. Stonks are huge right now. And he's like crying and going like, yes. $305 million worth of stonks are now stonking. I'm like Loki in the market for this kind of like small network type package to tell you

whether or not stonks. I mean, not that I have much use for it necessarily. Go to the PC world. I'm just looking at stonks primarily. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I don't even know what I would use it for, but it just kind of speaks to me a little bit, but they don't make them anymore. Killed by phones. Don't buy a computer anymore. The money, it's not, you can't buy computers anymore. Just wait for the bubble with the AI thing to crash.

But like laptops, laptops are kind of just over, you know? Like you can get, it's all like a little surface tablets or whatever, but it's not the same. It's not the same. I need a real keyboard. I can't do this. I need a little keyboard clitoris in between the G&H. Oh my god, yeah, no, absolutely. You can get a MacBook.

I mean, I guess, but I'm kind of committed to like a Windows sort of situation, I'm afraid. I've got on a PC in 2016 and I've been stuck, so. Yeah, yeah, yeah, same. But so, fucking Garber has to pursue him. And so he steals the patriotic chud HVAC truck. And we know that it's patriotic because it's got like 50 American flags on it. Yeah, I wonder if this represents anything about. I don't know.

Right. I don't know. And just drives after him down the street. They're going towards Brooklyn on a bridge, one of classic bridges. But New York has. Not the Brooklyn Bridge, the Manhattan Bridge. The Manhattan Bridge. The Manhattan Bridge.

Because he calls the cops going to the other way. He's heading towards the Manhattan Bridge. Close it off. The cops immediately do. And they're searching car to car. And Denzel Washington runs to the cab that John Chavorto was in and it's empty. Could have been an interesting kind of... I thought so too.

I wanted that to be the end of the movie. Wouldn't that have been fun? Yeah. Like the Thomas Crown Affair? Or even if you resolve it, looking car to car like the border scene in Sicario. But no, what they instead do is they, the train goes past, because the Manhattan Bridge is like, like road, subway train, pedestrian, right?

And the train goes past and he sees John Travolta just walking with the, still with the fucking goate. So he holds him at gunpoint, and he has to like walk across the path of an oncoming train in a way that is like, frankly, ice cold. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Barely steps out of the way of it in time, but it doesn't speed up at all.

Awesome. Yeah, yeah. Doesn't take his eyes off of Travolta. Fantastic stuff. That's really good. And as the cops are closing in, John Travolk was like, okay, man, earlier on I spared the life of Charlie Kirk. I gave you a life.

Now you got to do something for me. I want you to fucking shoot me because I don't want to go back to prison. And does I want to say, no, I'm not going to shoot you. And he's like, I'm going to give you 10 seconds. I still have my gun. Either you shoot me or I'm going to shoot you, right? I'm going to make you shoot me. It'll happen.

Sort of interesting, this sort of like manipulative thing. And again, I think that the movie doesn't really like linger with the discomfort of that as much as it should or might. Because he does force him to kill him. He's yelling at him, like there are cops running towards him that like Zelda's desperately trying to get fuck over here faster. Eventually he does, he does shoot him. Yeah, because John Travolta reaches for his gun and turns out of Washington like just guns and

he goes, you're my hero man and dies. Last line, he goes, you're, he does. because you're my goddamn hero. Yeah, really like bitter and ironic in a way that I really quite like. And then we see John Tartour like saluting him out of a helicopter, and they do the soft, mournful strings again. The uplifting fucking music. I thought that was an interesting choice to have that mortal in music after the

death of the villain. I was like, oh, okay, interesting. It really does believe in the sort of redemptive power here, and it's like, this could have been much darker than that, actually. Just like, no, you just made a guy know what killing someone feels like, you know, in order to get that. Contrast that. Cast your mind is back to the ending of Die Hall 3, where they killed Jeremy Irons, and then we get the triumphal like, da-da-da-da-da-da-da music. It's nice, and it makes a different choice. It's like, ooh, this is a little ambiguous. It's kind of undercut by the performance in the next scene

where Duns of Washington is like, hey, got to go home now, we're going to take the subway, thanks, James Gandalfini, and he's got a bit of a peppiness stuff. But when he goes, home was like, I killed a man at work today. Like skipping home. Yeah, yeah, ridiculous. I do sort of want to know whether there was an earlier draft of this that was more tonally ambiguous. He's something more than it, Christ.

Yeah. Because, yeah, as you say, he gets out of being debriefed by the cops who apparently have like no questions about like a civilian that they gave a gun, just shooting a guy in public. That's fine. Yeah. Not going to worry about that. No questions about the bribe either. Hey, no, that's dealt with by Gandalfini who goes, hey, guess what, tomorrow morning the city of New York is going to go to bat for you.

It's actually okay to embezzle from us if you kill for us, which is actually kind of the city's position, actually. The stance on New York mayors for this city, that this movie provides you is just like, yeah, they're going to be corrupt. Yeah. What are you going to do? It's just the mayor. He does say, it's been an amazing day. It's like, you killed the guy. It's been, what?

It's not been an amazing day. No, no. Perhaps not. And this is when we get the thing about how the mayor is not a Yankees fan, because presumably he's a Mets fan, because he embarks on this fucking baseball analogy here. Let's go Mets, baby. Love the Mets.

Come out and greet the Mets. He gets a pint of milk on his way home. It's got a bit of pepper and a step because it feels good to help your neighborhood. Doesn't get the lower amount. It gets the one his wife us for. Freeze frame on him smiling as he opens his front door. Good. Yeah.

You see him on the subway train driving home as well, because the mayor offers to drive him home with the sirens on everything. And he goes, I'll take the train. And you see a shot of him on the train being like, fuck, I love trains. The train does love trains. It loves trains. It loves New York City, which fair enough. Both cool things. It's got some problems with women.

It's got some interesting ideas of like redemptive masculinity. Like, it really kind of suggests that it should complicate the idea of redeeming your masculinity with violence. and then it just kind of doesn't. Yeah. It should. It kind of cheaps out about that. Yeah. Yeah, it really does.

And yeah, good movie. I really like it, though. I prefer it to the original. I think it's like, it's well made. It's exciting. I love the central performance from John Trafalter. I love the dynamic between him and Duns on Washington. And even the parts of the movie where I'm like,

oh, I wish that we'd had more here. I understand that the reason it's like that is because they've taken the decision to focus on those character relationships. I'm like, okay, if you're going to prioritize anything in a movie, That's the thing to prioritize. It's a type of movie that we don't really have as much now. We're kind of lacking for, I think we've talked about this when we talked about Die Hard, but kind of lacking for like middling action movies.

Like they're fun, right? You can't get fucking funding for it. Take it from me. Like, it is very hard to get money. The only people who can, right, and who do have their own kind of distribution network for it are chuds, right? The only way that you can see a movie like this now is to see a recently, you know, a recently cancelled actor in like a Ben Shapiro

exec produced thing about how gay ISIS is taking over college campuses. So, and they're like, why would you? Because it's not going to be good because those people don't know how to make movies. And so it's just, it's all just kind of wasted. And I think that's a, that's a real shame, you know? No, we're not going to watch those movies. No, it's, it's, maybe one to see, but it's not going to be interesting to really dive into them particularly, I don't think.

I don't think so. Is anyone going to be surprised to learn that they're bad and that they have bad ideas? Probably not. But we don't have to just be subjective about the Takeo Palo-1-2-3 Brackets 2009 because we have a science-based system. It's called the scum system. It's down to smum, cultural insensitivity, unnecessary violence and misogyny. Do you like the little half-second of pause before unnecessary that I work in?

I don't cut up in the other that thing. What? Unsomthing violence. Mm, on a scale of zero to seven, how smarmy is the Takey of Pelham 1,23, brackets, 2009, close brackets. That's a fucking tough question. It's hard to know, because I want to ding it for the editing, which is very self-satisfied, but also that is sincerely what the style was at the time.

Yeah, yeah, no, that's true. I think it's good smarm, right? I think it's high smear, but it's good smart. I think there's a lot of lines in here that are very much, like, screenwriter having shit eating grin on his face. You never see a U-Haul behind a hearse. But if you're an Academy Award-winning screenwriter, you're probably like, yeah, all right. I mean, I got the fucking, don't tell me shit about how my writing's bad.

I got a fucking Oscar on my show. No, I agree. I mean, they would never give an Oscar to something that was anything less than superlative, I'm pretty certain, so. That's an axiomy. Oh, really? Shit. Yeah, yeah.

That goes my plan. All right. So yeah, I think it's a high but as you say, good. Four, five? I would go for maybe like maybe a five. It's sort of like a, like a Brosnan Bond, you know? You're right.

That's a very good comparator. I would say, sir. We haven't even mentioned one of the smear things in it, which is they constantly put up the time left in like text on the screen. You keep seeing like 30 minutes left and stuff like that. Anticipated 24 there. Cultural insensitivity. Before we get an event, I just want to note.

The eight-year-old boy, I've just seen the actor, it was called Jake Siciliano. That's pretty fun. Sure. Give me a point of cultural sensitivity for that. Yeah. Weirdly, they changed to the Ellis Island. It was originally just Jake Smith. Reverse Ellis Island, but the reverse Godfather went through, where it made it more Italian.

Getting sent back to Italy from New York City. Will they take away your business? You got to make it more Italian. Putting Michael Colliot in the machine from Tenet and it's right back. Oh. No, fantastic. So, yeah, they do make Travolta an anti-Italian racist. They do.

We don't mention it, but he really does go all in on it. He hates Italians. Yeah. That's like his acceptable prejudice. It's, I mean, we try to solve racism, which is in a really kind of patronizing way, where it's like, you know, that tough-looking black men in the movie's coinage can be the troops. Yeah, but we solve it by making him assume that she's being racist to him and then have her turn. Which is not how you would do it if you were trying to solve racism.

And then he dies. And then he does, but he gives his life for her because of that beautiful moment where she revealed that she loves the troops. Yeah. I mean, that is, it's the movie trying to not be racist, trying to make a point about it. It's trying. Yeah. It's cack-handed but sincere. Also, for New York City, it is weirdly non-diverse.

Like, but for all that... That is something to note. Like, at least in the last one, all of the hostages were archetypes, but, like, they were archetypes. Like, they were different. In this, they're kind of just... Yeah. I mean, I guess we also do just have, like... We have a black guy as our lead actor, which is...

Yeah, absolutely. Nice to have. I mean, I think this... This is kind of like, this is like, woke 0.2, you know? Like it's, it's trying, it's trying to sort of get on the trends that like later would lead to woke one. But it's, I think it's like, there was a woman of color in the movie and she gets some like actual nice scenes instead of just being bullied like all the women of color were in the last one. Yeah, that's true. But wife, she has two scenes and yeah, okay.

Yeah, true. You know, the wife is a supporting role, but she good performance gets good, good moments. A bit with the milk is nice. There's no omission. No. I mean, that leaves us pretty low then, right? Yeah. It's certainly not grotesquely, sort of, like, offensive to anyone, as far as I can think.

Or we don't do the bit with the kind of weird Japanese guys from last time? No. No, we don't. It's, it might be zero, like. Like, maybe a one just on the basis of, like, it's New York City, right? Like, they don't, I think taking away the, like, um, bit in the original where they have the woman who only speak Spanish, for instance, like, it's sort of, or even Dog Day Afternoon, you know, had more kind of, like, texture to it.

Well, that at least had queer rep in it? Yes, no, absolutely. Oh, by the way, this is a, this is kind of apropos of nothing, but the Dog Day Afternoon currently has a stage adaptation on in New York, which I hear is fucking fire. I hear it's great, and also it's like very genre different than the movie, but go check that out of the industry. Okay. Zero, one.

Let's do one. I guess. I'm not thrilled with the only, like, gay representation being prison rape jokes, for one thing. Yeah, that's true. Where's my named hostage, the homosexual? Yeah. Where is the homosexual? The question I'm always asking.

Unnecessary violence. I mean... We have quite a bit more explicit violence than this one, but it does kind of rule. Yeah, it's not... Like, the violent level is up, but it's being brought up mostly by our... our villain here. I think we're pretty good here. Do we maybe want to ding it here for being, like, sucking off the troops and the cops a bit more? I do. I do. I want to ding it here as well. Yeah, to get high points on respecting the troops for sure. I want to ding it here for the

sniper thing as well, of, like, contriving a reason to have the cops just start shooting. I want to doing it for, like, making the gang's violence cooler rather than scary. Like, the thing 70s one, it's a thriller, right? You're meant to be like, oh my god, you could be killed at any time. Where it's here, it's like these guys are Sigma, which is a sort of negative change. So I think it's gotta be like a, like a three maybe, like ballpark. I could go high, I could go four. The sucking off the troops thing, I don't like it. Oh, I'll hear four. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, nice. Finally, misogyny. Misogyny.

Would you still love me if I was a worm? You have to answer me right now. I don't care what what kind of a suicide vest they've strapped you into. Women are wives or girlfriends. Yeah. You don't have any female... Or mothers. I don't recall there being any... There are no female employees at the MTA.

I think there might be a couple extras, but like... The first conductor who gets sent to bring the rest of the hostages from the rest of the cars back is a black woman. You're very true, yeah? But that's the, like, that's around about it, genuinely. Yeah. It's that and the wife. Yeah.

I might have liked a little bit, a little bit more. I think the one laptop scene is like pretty, pretty fucking bad. How about three? I'll do a three. Okay. That gives it a total score of six, ten, one, two, three, thirteen, which is worse than the last one, but is still pretty good. I would like to give a Cronstein rosette solemnly to one.

nameless, thankless, unsung New York City ambulance crew for out of nowhere attempting to kill a couple of cops for no reason. Framming as hard as you can into the cops, sending them off of a bridge. Magical. All right. That's my Cronstein, Rosette. Give him a good night.

Good night, cross to the train conductor. Yeah, give him a good night. Yeah. Well, no, that's above and beyond for the cause of villainy. Exactly. It would be the Cronstein. So the ambulance crew would get the Cronstein, and the train conductor lady gave her a good night. Well, I mean, they're gonna get the hostages killed, I guess.

Oh, that's flying. We need to have a new neutral award that's going above and beyond in the cause of something. The, like, International Human Rights Committee Award of Grater Neutrality or whatever. Like, it's just completely like, like, gray, beige square. Give him the beige heart. The beige heart. The beige heart, there we go. Given the beige heart.

For when the motifs are neutral or inscrutable, the beige hearts, above and beyond in the call of something. I actually like that a lot. Amazing. Okay, well, that's a new award as well. We're doing wonderfully here. The beige heart. Okay.

Commande to heaven is return to KJB. We're so bad. We're on it. So, thank you so much. We are recreating the glorious Zhao dynasty. That's right. Thank you so much for listening. We have a Patreon.

If you go to the Patreon and you subscribe to the Patreon and you give us five gold bars a month, you can listen to our bonus episodes of which the next one is going to be by this guy's brother. It's going to be a Devon Pick. It's fucking alien, baby. It's a movie about blue collar workers getting fucked over by management. And don't you tell Harry Dean Stanton different? Magical. Thank you so much for listening and we will see you next time. Bye everyone.

Goodbye. Bye. Goodbye, trainmaster. Goodbye, train master. I'll fucking kill you, train master. I'll kill you all. Thank you for listening to yet another episode of Kill James Bond. It's been about a week and a half since I recorded this,

and I just re-listened to it before recording this outro, and I got to say, banger, we're on fire. We're on fucking fire. When we can remember to upload the files, we are on fire, baby. Our next episode in two weeks' time, back here on the free feed, is going to be entrapment. That's right. How about a heist movie? How about a heist movie for once?

Sean Connery, Catherine Zeta Jones. What more do you want? What the fuck more do you want? If you want more than that, then you're going to have to head on over to our Patreon. Patreon.com slash Kill James Bond where next week we're uploading Alien, Alien one, the original Alien.

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Some new fucking Kill James Bond highlights out Check them out. Real good. Real good. I'm not saying that about my own jokes. I mean, my friend's jokes were good, and the production of the video is good. Check out the video. Messlick ear. Saiga. Willie Schenmeier, once again, very tired therapist.

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Saturday's clan, clocky gladriol, silly vixen, Dr. Mrs. the gay rap. Keikadum, Beta Braver, Anna, Arizona, Frog Strangler, Chris Roth, Annie, Hong Kong, Ruby. May Victoria Roth turned in her badge and laptop. Finn Ross, 623, chimp with the sword, Krista Swisher, Daniel, Britain. Commander Freddy, Anya They Nanigans. Badi Ariane, Clarification, Nobles Obloz-Obla, Alex, Liz Nash of University of Florida, Delta, Obsidian Polymer. Walskott, Sengshar, Isopold Gail, Clarendes, Colleck, Conorbic sister, Loss Picoke, Harriet McAvoyne never changes her name. Shouldn't need to.

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thank you all so much for being supporters of our show. Kill James Bond is November, Abigail and Devon. Our producer is the wonderful Mr. Nape. They are editor. It's the fantastic Sam Arterosian. Our podcast artist by John DeLuca. Our website is by Tom Allen. And we will see all of you.

Next time.