Kill James Bond! - S4E46: Entrapment

Episode Date: September 4, 2026

It's something approaching negligence for us to get this far into Heist Season without talking about one of the greatest heist films of all time, a masterpiece of the 'dangerous age gap Old Man Fucking' genre, Catherine Zeta Jones and Old Man Connery in Entrapment! ---- HANDS OFF LEBANON Here are some fundraisers to support collective rebuilding and survival efforts on the ground in Lebanon. -Beit El-Baraka started out as a food bank, but has grown to help people afford rent, cover their essentials, and live with dignity.  https://beitelbaraka.org/donate-directly/ or donate in general https://beitelbaraka.org/donate-now/ -LiveLove was a charity for a number of other matters, but since 2024 has been solely comitted to helping people displaced by Israeli attacks. https://livelove.org/donate -Lebanese Food Bank supports displaced and impoverished people https://lebanesefoodbank.org/take-action/donate/ Solar Powered Lebanon is an initiative to restore people's power using solar panels, since larger infrastructure is at constant risk of attack. https://fundahope.com/en/campaigns/solar-powered-lebanon ----- FREE PALESTINE My friend Ahmed still needs to feed his family and afford medicine. Anything you can kick in would be hugely appreciated. https://chuffed.org/project/150817-please-help-ahmed-and-his-family-get-food-drink-and-medicine And these are some more general links you can support collective efforts with! -The Palestinian Communist Youth Union is doing a food and water effort, and is part of the official communist party of Palestine https://www.gofundme.com/f/to-preserve-whats-left-of-humanity-global-solidarity -Water is Life, a water distribution project in North Gaza affiliated with an Indigenous American organization and the Freedom Flotilla https://www.waterislifegaza.org/ -Vegetable Distribution Fund, which secured and delivers fresh veg, affiliated with Freedom Flotilla also https://www.instagram.com/linking/fundraiser?fundraiser_id=1102739514947848 ----- WEB DESIGN ALERT Tom Allen is a friend of the show (and the designer behind our website). If you need web design help, reach out to him here:  https://www.tomallen.media/ Kill James Bond is hosted by November Kelly, Abigail Thorn, and Devon. You can find us at https://killjamesbond.com

Hey, this is entrapment. What? I said, this is called entrapment. Hello and welcome to another episode of Kill James Bond. I am November Kelly. I am joined, as always, by my friends Abigail Thorne and Devon. Hello. Cowabunga.

And girls, I'm really lost. I don't know what movie we're doing. I've completely lost track of it. I don't, what episode is this? Like, I don't, if only there was someone... Tell me what film... Hey! This is entrapment.

Oh! Okay, right, right, right. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. We are going back for more old Sean Connery. This has been in the works for a long while. We've been brewing this one. Old man Connery. You've got to...

Listen, it's so good to get an old man Connery, you've got to ration them out every year and a half. It's like unwrapping a chocolate, you know, from the selection box. It's like being like delicious, a little treat just for me. Metal Gear Solid 4 has been re-released. People are thinking about old men again. And so it's really time to think about one of the most old men movies of all time. This is old man excellence here. Oh, it is.

I had a great time. I've never seen this movie before. I'd never even heard of it before. And I really had a great time with it. And also found it to be like in some places quite hot. So here's the thing. This is a romantic-agreed, erotic thriller, which is a genre that we don't really do anymore because of, I don't know why we don't do this anymore. And I think that's a grave shame, you know?

End of history, maybe. I mean, this is 1999, right? Yeah, the only person still making horny movies is Jane Schoenbrun, basically. Like, other than that, nobody's doing the, like, erotic movie anymore. Yeah, like the kind of age-gap erotic romance is like Jane Schumbron, and then that's like, I mean, I have some thoughts, right? Because this movie, I enjoyed it for what it was, but I couldn't help but sort of fan cast a little bit. And so every so often in the course of this recording, I am just going to shout names at you.

Because I think Sean Connery, right, is obviously he's our goats, right? Brackets, don't ask. I don't think that is the conclusion we came to. No, it's not. No, no. reviews those. But yes. But he is the goat.

Yeah, he's our original bond, right? And so I think we love an old Connery. We love an old Connery movie. In the canon of Old Conneries, I don't think this is his best. I don't think he's great in this. Well, that's no league of extraordinary gentlemen. Well, exactly. No, no, no.

Absolutely not. That's a movie. No. This is the first time I have ever found Sean Connery sexy in all the Really? Okay. Yeah. And I really like his performance in this.

So now we have conflict of this episode. They do. They do really try. We do. The crystals sort of miss a light. Yeah, I think he's acting and this is great. Of course, we have conflict in this movie from the first frame because it flashes up a big red trap at me on screen and I go, what did you fucking call me? You call that?

Yeah. It's like, you know. Yeah, I'm like Shama on. It's like, oh, sorry, we forgot the N and the MENT. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But there is, someone is doing diabolic shit. And I like seeing someone do diabolic type shit.

As we learned from past episode TopCathy and future episode when Tom Cruise dies, Mission Impossible, heisting is about some high wire suspension bondage shibari nonsense. Yes. Yes, it is. Harness-based activity, like a lot of lesbianism, right? Like, it's like, you got to, like, repel down the side of a building and perfectly sort of open a window frame

and remove the entire window from the wall and then, like, lithely sort of slide into the building. Like, yeah. We see this thief who's, we don't know the thief's agenda, but they are kind of wearing a full body suit like a night vision crash helmet. And by the way, we're in New York, and it's 1999.

It's 16 days until the millennium. We also see the World Trade Center there. We carry the flame, Samapai, or whatever. And then this thief does this shit. It even has like an automatic remote alarm hacking device that turns the hacking off. It's really great. I love it.

The future is now, you know, and it has a keypad. And this thief, we also see that this thief is being observed through a telephoto lens from another sky screen. Yeah. Being watched. So they're thief. They remove a painting to reveal a hidden say. Ah, no, they don't.

No, it's the painting itself. They're stealing. Oh, sorry, my bad. They steal the painting. The painting is a Rembrandt. Painting is a Rembrandt. It's Bathsheba. It's Bathsheba at her bath by Rembrandt,

which is, I suspect, it's a deliberate choice. For her to be. Yes, because it's a... It's kind of a bit of a sexy and erotic painting by the standards of the time, you know? It's a scene in which a woman is bathing and is being observed. And if you know your Bible story, you know that immediately afterwards, Bathsheba is impregnated consensually or not. Well, yeah.

But the point is, it's an erotic, not erotic, it's classic, but like, it's a sexy fucking painting, you know. I mean, all this stuff is, like all these guys were bricked up looking at them and they were bricked up painting them as well. I think this is key, you know. Just in these, like, in this time, your evil corporates come back had like a Rembrandt. They had some class to it. These days it would be some fucking listless Jeffrey Epstein style, nude, whether that, you know, it's the woman is like looking forlornly down. It's like, oh, you know, you're looking at me naked. It's like, no, fuck, now.

Rembrandt, give me the fucking class. Yeah, this thief, they roll it up into a postal tube, stick it down the postal chute and replace it with a sort of cheap painting of Elvis Preyce. I am being haunted by him, the Elvis double feature. That's Val Kilmer. He's telling you to go and kill people for cocaine. Replacing it with a painting of Mentor. Listen, is this all makes sense if you listen to a rest of monosense? It's a bit forward to a four sizzle for you out there.

Yeah, yeah. I love the contraptions, by the way. Oh, God, yeah. They've got a contraption for cutting a wire that's right central behind the painting that is essentially like a telescoping right angled scissor, and it's fantastic. That is a microphone boom arm like I've got mine on. You can't fool me. Oh, it is.

So the thief leaves and whoever was photographing them leaves and puts a hat on as they leave, which is one of the classic old guy activities. It's like your aura farming when you do this, you know? Yeah. But we see that the tube is being mailed to a guy called Conrad Green and Malaysia. And then we cut to Malaysia and we see Conrad Green. He's a fat guy smoking hooker. He's on the phone to this thief.

And he says, ah, you know, well, good job on the Rembrandt. It's in the mail. Good for you. But you still owe me $40 million. He has a house full of Malaysian twinks serving him. He does. He does. This gay guy, he's kind of, I say gay guy.

I mean, he's playing it gay. It's kind of downstream of like Sydney Green Street in Maltese Falkin. I'm not. not going to do the impression, listen to Big A self-crimes on your own time. But, like, it's, yeah, it's a little bit homophobic, if you ask me. Yeah. But so, he, you know, meanwhile, at the offices of Waverly Insurance, Catherine Zeta Jones. Catherine Zeta Jones.

My jaw hits the floor. And does not move. Wales's favorite daughter, absolutely. And looking in this movie, pure spits of my, of Nicole Names. Very, very cool. Very happy about that. She, I mean... Not familiar. She looks like Catherine Zeta Jones, though, and that was what was getting me. Yeah, that's the main thing.

I was like pure spits, Catherine Zeta Jones, right? Nicole Mains from Supergirl. Nicole Mains from Yellow Jackets. Nicole Mains from the Prince. Nicole means from my friend Nicole. Oh, right. Right. Right. I texted her and said, you look like Catherine Zita Jones in this film, right? That's very nice to say, right? The main thing about Catherine Zita Jones in this movie is that everyone else in the movie is very aware

that she looks like Catherine Ziza Jones. There's no dressing this down. There's no denying it. Like, her boss, a guy who looks like Ryan Gosling on his prednisone year, comes in and is like, this scene is like, it's like an instructional workplace DVD on sexual harassment, but for like how to do it the right way? Because he's like...

He wants a date. He really wants a date. There's implied that there's some history. Maybe he's asked before and she's turned him down. he throws in a little... He says, when I used to work for the FBI, which is a key tell for someone

still being part of the FBI. I would say so. It's one of the main things. He's like, you're working late, like, you know, were you with someone last night? Because this is, this is not just banter, this is like repote.

There's meant to be like a frisson here, other French words. You were with someone last night? This is an erotic thriller. Yeah, she bucks. She has a strict, you know, and not that strict work-life, sex, life balance, you know? And like, this is being brought up in a way, not to suggest that this guy is a creep, right?

But to suggest that they both fuck and that the vibe here is like, oh, this is kind of like, this is a sex movie a little bit. Yeah, it's a little bit like after dark. But she ensures valuable rare art, and she, in fact, insured the Rembrandt. And so her boss, Hector, is like, well, Rembrandt got stole, lull. And she's like, yeah, I know. I think I know how they did it.

And she's, like, figured out this thing with the window that the thief did. And she says there's only one man in the world who could have fucking done this. James Bond. Before she even identifies James Bond, she speaks a little Chinese for him. Just so that, you know, she's, like, worldly and cultured. And says, let a thousand flowers bloom. And I wrote down, strange. It's almost as if people don't believe a mouse could be an insurance investigator.

I ended up clipping now but just for... But a thousand flowers bloom Chairman Mao. You got it. Well, I ain't spend it any time, right? I mean, I will be holding to the view that this woman is like a hardcore Maoist

the whole way through this movie. That's important to me. I don't know if she does anything to disprove that, so I'm prepared to accept it. I believe it. No, straight up. No, certainly not. Hardcore Maoist.

Old James Bond, the only man who could have done this, and she flashes up his file, which does two things, right? One, hugely flattering to Sean Connery. They de-aged his character 10 years. He is playing 60. He is 69, almost 70 at the time of making this. Also, it says that his hair is brown brackets graying.

Motherfuck, it has been grayed. It's not like, that's a process has occurred. The Sean Conner is playing this legendary art thief, McDougal, and the boss is like, well, there's just one hitch in your theory here, which is that he's 60 years old. There's no way he's fucking high wiring down the side of a skyscraper in 60. And she's like, no, it's definitely him. It's definitely him.

Additionally, you've wanted this guy for like half of these. You've thought that McDougal had done like half of the things you've had to investigate. He's old. As Hector, the boss says, he ain't Spider-Man anymore, which, yeah, we've all been seeing the Petro Parker art. I think it's very cool. But she says, no, no, no, this is classic Mac. In many ways, you might say this is the return of the hymn.

It's, you know, I knew it was. Come on. Yeah. But, you know, she's like, he was just here in New York and he's just flown back to London. We've got to go after him. And Hector's like, no, no, no, no, no. We've lost two agents, Tramette Chase this guy down before. And she says they were both men.

I've got more sexual harassment to do. Yeah. She basically goes, send me. I'll fuck him. Send me, right? Because we know two things about him. He likes a challenge and he likes pretty girls. So we will send me and set a trap for him.

Exactly. Yeah. She is an old man thick seeking missile. Yeah. She is the gilf seeking missile. She's wearing a t-shirt that says, I love old man sex. She's got a sticker on her water bottle that says like old man sex enjoy her. She's going to hunt down this old man and she is going to fuck him.

And here's the thing. When you send a man. man to do a job like that, the movie that results is sleuth. And that's a great movie. That's not this movie. Not this movie. Yes. No, no, no, absolutely not.

And so he tries to sexually harass her brackets positive a couple more times. He's like, he literally says, well, you have lunch in the park by yourself. You don't have any friends at the office. And I'm like, wow, okay. Like, all you talk about is old man sex. You're constantly writing like your old man sex, A.O.3. It's like crazy work, but can a merely middle-aged man with a mustache, get it? He's like trying to do exercises to look older.

He's like, starts to stay to smoke. He's like dressing more old-fashioned. He's like visibly hunching at work. Yeah. Pretending to not be able to hear you. You ever been so in love with someone that you just change part of your aspect for them, and then it just stays that way as part of your personality, you know? Like, this guy is going to be like,

20 years time, he's going to be acting way older than his years because he was in love with Catherine Zeta Jones. And we get the sense. So this is not even wholly unwelcome. He's just, he's not the guy. He's just not old enough. Mac is the guy. Mac is the guy. So in London.

So he sent her to London. And there is a shot of Catherine Zeta Jones in officewear in a Vauxhall Corsa with her hair up, which is doing something to me. Like. sends her to Landon. It's... Landon. It's not controversial to say that Catherine Deucin Jones is a tremendously attractive one, but this is giving 2000s, like, Y2K workwife in a way that is, like, dangerous to me.

I'm clawing at my arm. I'm like... She looks incredible. She looks incredible. Apart from the one-th-hour, she'll get it. Yeah, she, like, stakes out this business, right, where this tech firm And she sees old Connery go in in disguise as an even older mask. He's in disguise as the GP from Hot Fuzz.

He is in disguises himself in Indiana Jones in the last crusade. Additionally, I was saving an Indiana Jones joke. Additionally, this is right up against the millennium. As all movies that came out in 1999 were about the millennium in some way, this one is very, very much about it. You are constantly being reminded that are like on-screen things that go, it is this many days until the millennium. 15 days to the millennium.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. They really thought that people were going to give a fuck. And to be honest, and this is not just that I don't remember my childhood transsexual thing. I don't remember how I spent the millennium at all. I was probably doing kids stuff. Neither do I, because, of course, I wasn't born at the time. No, no, of course. But to be fair, there is a plot relevant reason why the millennium is the ticking clock in this.

But anyway, she waits outside this tech company. for a while, and then the alarm goes off, the fire alarm, and the building gets evacuated, and she sees Old Man Connery walk out of the building, and she's like, you just stole something, you motherfucker. Motherfucker's got fizzy lifting drinks in his back right now. You fizzy lifting drinks, even motherfucker! I'm going to bite off my own fingers.

When she gets back in the hotel, right, she puts a slice of pizza that she's holding into her mouth temporarily to take her shoes off. This is diabolical. This is written by someone who is correctly, horny about women. This is, this is my... You're so right.

There is some kind of female gay's shit going on in this that I really, really like... When she gets home from work? Yes. Like, I... When wife returns, they understand this very deeply. Again, it's funny weird for me

because just like, like, doppelganger of my friend Nicole. I'm just like, that's a little odd to me. But all right, I get it. She's pretty many. She... Fucking babbling. You are babbling right now. Someone understands...

I've never seen you be like this incoherent. Listen, I have to... I have to reestablish my credentials as a woman kisser, for one thing. But, like, I... After the last episode and after all the things I'm going to say about old man sex in this episode, but, like, no, she... Someone understands that one of the hottest things that a woman can be is tired. Like, not...

Like, just, like... Just kind of a bit exhausted. the places that that leads, you understand what it is to love and to worship a woman, you know, at that point. Like, it's this and it's better call soul, right? Like, the work where the... Yeah, I just posted a picture of Nicole in the group chat. You can see what I mean.

It's just... It's just... It's... Roll overhead of the group chat and take look at Catherine Zeta Jones. Wow, it's Catherine Zeta Jones. She goes to bed. She finds out, number one, that all her shit's been gone. When she gets back to the hotel, she finds that all of her stuff has been stolen.

Which is why when Sean Connery appears in her bedroom in the middle of the night in the corner, she is naked because all her pajamas have been fucking stolen. And it's like, ooh, sexy. But it's not why she sits up and doesn't move the blanket to cover her breast at all. Like, she does that by choice. She wants the old man penis. She wants it. She sits up just like,

and it doesn't make any move to cover herself at all. I'm just like, God, diabolical. Yeah, it's good. Yeah. And Sean Connery here is playing the familiar character of Sean Connery mentor, you know, from like the Untouchables or Indiana Jones. But the less familiar twist on it of the Sean Connery mentor who fucks you. Because he, like, this is like, it's like sort of elder, elder Gen X fucking 50 shades,

almost. Kind of is. There's a little bit of 50 shades in this. That generation, I think, really liked their sexuality with a hint of, like, safe danger, you know? Like, the milk tray man, right?

Like, this guy, he's going to climb into your window in the middle of the night and then respect you. Which is... At midnight, it tries to be like, I respect your boundaries. He did steal all of a cloak, though. They hadn't invented the tech yet

of, like, the kind of A.O.3 man who is going to, like, climb in your window and, like, do sort of, like, horrible things to you because of how much he respects you, right? The Christian Grey isn't invented yet, right? But, like, this guy is sort of, like, the prototype, you know? You can see the lineage. You can see the descent of the sexy man. But she gives him the bait.

She's like, look, this famous Chinese mask, which is worth $40 million, is going to be exhibited soon. I'd pay more than that for a Chinese mask. In the UK. I don't talk about. It's going to be exhibited soon. Don't you want to steal it with me? And he's like, Mehow, fine shit is what I'm saying.

Man, all right, I'm going to air a grievance on this podcast right now. My beloved wife, the spirit of my world, says fine shite, like, because she believes wholeheartedly that the Y means that it should be pronounced shite. And potentially that's true. But it doesn't have the same kind of life. That's what I'm saying. You can't do this. Fine shite. Anyway, I'm hearing fine shit for the first time right now on this podcast.

Farmer leaning over his fence to discuss his new Chinese mass member. There's some fine shite, I tell you that for sure. Is that the sort of British equivalent of pot stuff? Maybe. Realizing that the only sort of cultural exchange that has led that could possibly lead to the line. Niehow Fine Shite is the Jackie Chan movie The Foreigner. Giving that line to Pierce Brosner as Jerry... I forgot about that movie where Jackie Chan goes to solve Irish violence.

All of that actors just do whatever, man. It's good. Yeah, it's really, really good. But, but... Point being, okay. What was the incident at your Bond actor? This Chinese mask, it's going to be exhibited. It's worth $40 billion. I'm an art thief.

You're an art thief. Let's team up and we'll steal it. And he's like, okay, I'll shoot tomorrow at 9 o'clock in the morning. And if I'm late itch because I'm dead, because I have autism. If I'm late itch because I'm dead. Because I'm autistic about being on time. I'm three hours. I'm bailing out of that corner.

That was terrible. I'm three hours early for everything. No, that's fine. We'll leave it on. I'm five minutes late for. everything consistently. But that's good enough. He disappears in a whisper like Batman.

He does. He's Jason Bourne, sir. He does. He goes, you're not looking tired and then disappear. You're thinking about Batman, and it is Batman for the time, but I think of this as being Jason Bourne. He's Jason Bourne, so. Yeah, no.

This is a Jason born move. But so the next morning, he sets her a test, right? So he takes her to an antique shop in a Jaguar, and he's like, go in there and steal this this Ming Vaj, that's from this guy, right? Yeah. I'm gonna give you a fake credit card. Yeah. Catherine Zeta Jones, right?

Incredibly beautiful woman. I would crawl across 18 miles of radioactive broken glass to shake her hand, right? We understand this. Her American accent in this, waivers. I was wanting it to crack. I wanted to hear a bit of those valleys. It gets a little bit of valleys. occasionally, and specifically the back and forth between him saying Vaj and her saying

vase, because she's American, it drops a bit here, which I really cherish. Imagine notice I kind of like it. But we get this fabulous bit of screenwriting because the guy who runs this art shop is, first of all, Guy, I love to see Kevin McNally. But this is like one scene, you need to characterize this guy as being an asshole. So we see him walk out of a bathroom. We see the flush, we don't hear him wash his hands. He comes out smoking a big cigar and immediately hits on her.

And I'm like, that's peak screenwriting, baby. Immediately establish this guy as a guy we don't like. Great. I know this guy immediately. Yeah, yeah, yeah. To go from putting my wife on blast to putting my wife on a pedestal, I will say she's funny than me because she points out that Catherine Zita Jones is dressed like a Hannah-Barbera character in this scene.

Just like Daphne specifically, actually. Yeah. Yeah, no, real, real. So, but she sort of like sees that the vows is a fake, right? But she also sees that there's something inside of it. So she catches the kind of mission within the mission. He holds her at like cookery point, which is an unexpected choice of knife. But the way that it sort of like cradles the jaw, I'm like, this is tech, actually.

This is actually very hot. I'm sorry, I'm like this. It's because she tried to use an American Express card. This is average Amex user experience. Is the guy's like, no, this is, we don't. Don't take out my threat to her with a knife. She smashes the bars over his head and knocks him out. With a cookery.

Yeah, and then swipes the film from inside, right? Mm-hmm. So, we see that they try and get after Connery outside, and this is one of the other failings of the movie. Or it's not a failing of the movie, it's charming. Sean Connery, 69 years old, not necessarily in the best shape of his life. And so what we get is what I would describe as the oldest punch. Like in history. Like, it's like watching like a really old door close.

It's like, yeah. It's like the Irishman, man. This goon shoots the window off the Jaguar and tries to pull Catherine Zeta Jones out. Yeah, they've got like a barbarian for some reason who comes for them. Yeah, they just, though, and like, Sean Connery punches him. And then inexplicably, this goon draws a knife and then like leaps on top of the parked Jaguar and tries to stab it through the roof instead of going through the door. He's going sea of thieves mode.

Bro, why did you do that? You could have just tried the door again. It's pirate mindset, right? You see the canvas and you're like, this is what powers the car, I assume. So I'm going to try and, like, de-mask it, you know. So we get a brief chase scene. This guy is too old to drive. He shouldn't be doing this.

But so he's like, you failed to test. He's still old to be doing much of this. Yeah. But she's like, no, I got the film actually. He yells at her for not getting the vase. And he hits her with a good girl. And it's like, oh, good girl. Thank you, I should have gone around.

Thank you. There's a few of these in this movie. Good girl. He does say good girl a couple of times throughout the movie. He does. He does. He does. And we establish that what's on the film is the plans,

the plans for Bedford Palace where the Chinese mask is going to be exhibited, right? At this point, he also, when they get back to the hotel, he gives her back her clothes. Hot. Some of, not all of them. Just some of them. Just some of them. I'm like, oh.

It's sexy. Pretty good line for her. She goes, you stole my luggage. And he goes, I'm a thief. Sue me. Yeah. They go to the roof of the hotel where he's like, by the way, I stole five computer chips from the tech company the other day. One of them is in your suitcase, which is with hotel security.

So you better come with me right now. Or I'm going to call the cops and dob you in. And she's like, that's where she's like, this is entrapment. He's like, no, it's blackmail. This is actually blackmail. But-da-ba-da! Yeah. And then my note says,

actually entrapment is what cops try to not do to thieves because the cases, and then I get distracted and go, did you just fly from London to the Highlands of Scotland in a helicopter in one go? They do that. They do. They fly to his castle?

It's so fucking sexy. Like, it's, oh my God. It's so good out there. It's kind of, this distracts me from the sexiness because it's just, it's too mental, and I'm like, This is my bat cave from when I was shot off. It is the bat cave from when I was shot on.

This is my mission hub, but I keep my collectibles. You play that Shashan's Creed, too. It is, it is. It is the mission hub. And he has a bunch of contemporary art in his walls. And she's like, who else do you bring here? And he's like, nobody. I live alone, but maybe you could fix me with the power of your incredible pushy.

It's so good. And she's like, very romantic. It's so sexy. The lonely older man who won't even admit that he's lonely, but you can change him. Oh, it's so sexy. Listeners, if you're a sexy older man who is desperately lonely

and could change with the help of a beautiful woman and has a mission hub full of collectibles and millions of dollars, then, um, uh, Bryce N.

If you're a sexy older woman, stop riding in, we don't want to hear from you. Alternatively, listeners, if any of you are a sexy younger woman who would like to come and make, who would like to come and make a

aggressive play at me. Please feel free. Yeah, if you want to make a very aggressive play at any of us in our mission hubs, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't make an aggressive play. Yeah, by all means. If you want to come and make an aggressive play to cure my loneliness,

we'll teach you the secrets of podcasting. Yeah, I'd love to. God, damn it. I don't have a mission hub. Maybe I should get one, honestly. I have a mission hub. Come see my mission hub, listeners. You've got a mission hub.

You have a shipping container full of photography equipment. What else is that? You have a bat cave. That is not. It's not the kind of like foyer that you have your Lego figures walking around to select from. It's a starter back cave, you know? It's a starter back cave. I don't need it much larger.

Either way. He does have the talk with her now, which is nice. They're on the bed and he goes, listen. Oh, this scene is so good. My dick does not work. You need to understand that. I love this scene because he shows her to a bedroom and she says, okay, where do you sleep? And he goes, why?

and she's like, okay, so I need something in the night. And he sees right through this shit. He says to her, okay, is there anyone you've ever met who you haven't been able to seduce? And she goes, no. And he's like, okay, here's the rules. If we're going to be colleagues, we cannot fuck. It's like podcasting, okay? Like, we have to agree.

Yeah. Even if there's tension, we can't, we can't fuck. We can't do it because it'll ruin the show, right? Yeah. And it's really, really well acted here. There's a good chemistry and it's kind of hot. He's letting her down in a way this is like, look, you know, I do find you attractive subtextually, but like, we're going to work together. Her face the whole time as well is unbelievably hot.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's very important to understand this as a kind of like frank transporter level of laying out rules that you yourself are going to break almost immediately. But my favorite thing after this, after he's like, my dick don't work, I got to take to Dallafil first. And also, like, it's, it doesn't work anymore. I'm gonna need some shy out. He leaves. He leaves and she like lightly bunks her head off the bed post like, because she wants old man sex and she's not getting it.

And she's so real. She's so, so horny. Damn it. She really wanted to fuck this guy in it. He's got a castle. You gotta fuck him. If he brings you to the castle, you got it. Oh my God, it's so good.

It's like, I'm in his castle right now. You're gonna bring me here and not give me the old man sex. This is torture. This is edging. This is like reprehensible. Yeah. Like, I don't care. Like, take whatever you've got to take for it.

Like, have a heart attack during. But like, come on. You know? One last right. It's like dust. It's like dust puffing out of the fucking end. But it's like, it doesn't matter. They go over the plans.

They go over the plans behind. And his plan is, his plan is, I'm going to do it all my shelf. Okay? You're just going to wait and you'll get 10 pot of shent. And she's like, no, fuck off. I want to do it with you, right? And he's like, you can't, you're a girl. And she's like, well, I stole the fucking Rembrand in New York.

It was me all along. My fucking cover job is an insurance agent. But actually, I stole it. And he's like, yeah, right. You must be a hell of a climber then. And to prove it, she climbs the fucking walls, which I love. Yeah, it's kind of brassy. It's like, really, we're dialing up the, like, age difference as well in a way that

is like, it's toxic and fun, which is a combination they don't let you do. anymore. It's really good. In order to demonstrate how good a clamory is, she's like doing like beam balancing on the beam in this room and she's like doing the splits and like standing on one leg in a way that's like kind of sexy and he's like, oh damn, that's crazy if my dick worked it would be really hard right now. He's like, I'm glad I can't get bricked up anymore. She's doing it.

It's really her as well. It's great. Like just really good. Yeah. Little beam. And he's like cool. One slight hitch in that story though is that I have the Rembrandt right. right here because I was the one who was watching you through the telephone lens,

and I just went down and still lived in the fucking mailroom. So, fuck you. And she's like, you son of a bitch. Got out thieves. Yeah. Yeah. You still have things to learn, young Padawan. Like, incredible.

Sure. So fucking sexy. It's so, right. It's so sexy. And so he's like, so who's green? Who's the guy in Malaysia? She's like, I owe him $100 million. It's not yet time in the movie for us to reveal why yet.

Okay, cool. So she does a bunch of, like, training montage bullshit with him. And he gets some supplies ordered it. Which means that we have to meet his contact. Oh. Crimes Q. Tebowdo. Ving Rhimes.

Amazing. Hi. Welcome to the show. Guy we see. The first thing he says when he walks into a scene is, why does my Jaguar look like it's driven off a cliff? Establishing that that car was... Really funny.

Really funny. Cute. I like it. Yeah. And so he's giving them all the gadgets that they're going to need for the heist. Yeah. He does... He does say, because he got like, kind of like smaller ones, presumably for Catherine's Deza Jones.

He does use a real sort of like, he delivers a real cyberpunk line here, which is you've got to be a damn elf to use one of these things, which charms me. Do you like that. Yeah. It's near Christmas, I guess. He's got her like swimming. Yeah, she's got her swimming like in the lock for two hours as a bit, essentially, just to torture her a bit, which again, 50 shares. It's also a little telescope set up. to watch her, which they both take a little look at.

Bing Wames is like, thing Wings like, Dan, she's not. I told her, Brackett's lying. Yeah, I told her brackets lying that I swim in the lock for an hour every day, so she's going to do too. This is the, yeah, this is the kind of frisson of like, you know, BDSM that we like.

At this point, Sean Connery says to Ving Rames says, have you ever bought a woman's dress? And Vig Rames looks at him like, what the fuck? I'm not about... July Gladiator movies, Billy. Not about two minutes of you. Just getting a little too confessional here. And it's like, it's for the job. I have to buy her a dress for the job.

And Ving Rames is like, oh, well, I would guess she's a size six. Give her a size four. She'll look sexy, right? And it's like, ah, well, that's US dress sizes. You have to do the conversion, but whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever. And then he says to Sean Connery, the thing that might not say, me and my autistic friends admit they suppress their neurodiversions at work, Bing Rames says, this mask thing better be worth it.

And Sean Connery says, oh, it is. Moods, moods, moods. Me when I meet the $400 million Chinese mask. But so... Gotta be the phone. Yeah. I know. There's an interesting exchange, by the way.

Where Tibre asks Connery, it's like, they make reference to a bigger thing that's going to happen next. This mask thing is only the first of a pair of heists what they're going to do. Yeah. Good bit of forwards. was all on that. Yeah, and so we finish out this training montage.

Two details that I really, really love. Detail number one, there's a scene of them jogging. They could get five steps out of Connery. And this is the most shooting around it that I really like. It's clever to put it in a montage. No, I really like this because he's ahead of her and then goes, come on, come on, catch up. He's laughing.

And she overtakes him and then we see him go, because he's like, hide how out of it is. It's really funny. But then we get to the laser bit. Oh, they are constructing the laser room. Oh, my fucking God.

I'm going to kill myself. There's going to be a big room full of laser trip wires. When will it be my turn to be happy? They know where the laser is going to be. So, Kaffa Zedians has to practice a little routine of, like, going around than above the lasers, right? And she's good at it,

but Connery's still stern about her. And she's like, When are you going to give me some credit for being good at it? And she says, I can do this thing blindfolded. And he's like, oh, yeah? So he blindfolds her. The scene, dude. Have you seen the animatrix?

The dark red silk blindfold? Velvet. Oh, yeah. And he watches her do the obstacle course. And it's super sexy, but in a very specific way. It's not like, okay, Catherine Zita Jones, very beautiful woman. But we don't get a lot of shots of like tittyes and asses. Instead, what we get is her breath is very high in the mix, and it's intentional movement.

It's slowness, its breath, its concentration. And that's where the eroticism comes. She's not wearing like a skimpy outfit either. She's wearing, like, you know, normal clothes as she's doing this. And I love Connery's expression in this because he watches her, and since she's blindfolded, he doesn't have to worry about her seeing this, he watches her and his face looks like a man remembering what sexual desire feels like. They are playing the age gap here in a way that I really like.

Yeah. This is bondage, right? It is. And it's interesting to me because it's bondage without tying anything to anything. It's the sort of the ropes, and these are like ropes rather than lasers here. You know, constrain movement. And it's about that kind of constraint and navigation and sort of like athleticism and strain and struggle in a very tangible way.

That's the high-minded bit. The low-minded bit here went, if he's the type of guy to sneak in her room and do the milk tray man type of stuff, he's a thief. What he's done here by blindfolding her is contriving a way to do the perfect stealth wank. Zero decibels. Potentially, but it's not getting hard. No. No, I mean, this is the thing.

Like, this is the benefit of being old, right? The wanks get stealthier, I imagine, because it's come less, right? It's the same as going on estrogen. He's got to just do the wank of the mind at this stage. Entered my masturbatory mind palace. He is doing the wank of it. There is another bit earlier on where she like leans over in front of him, and he does the Joe Biden thing of smelling her hair.

So it's like, shnef, shneff, woman detected. It's, yeah. The scene is so good, because it's basically just like very complex dance moves which she's doing, like very slow, very deliberate moving around these things. And Cino Jones is a very good dancer, so she's great at this. And it's doing like long fades between her moving and Sean Connery's face. Some of them are amusing. Some of them are very sexy.

But there's one point where he like bites his lip a little. And then almost goes like, no to himself and you see him do it. It's pretty good. Yeah. But yeah, this is bondage, this is dance. This is drill almost. It's like, there's a lot of these things in here. This is also where I start naming other old men, right, who I think could pull us up, right?

I enter the old man wing of my mind palace, Clint Eastwood. Yeah, fine. He'd be fine as like a baby. Charles Darts. Charles Dance could do it. Nah. Charles Dance would kill me if he did this. By this point, George Clooning.

Yes, yes, absolutely. Is it out of an age to do this? Yeah, okay. remake this movie with me and George Clooney? Anthony Hopkins. Oh, yeah. Well, this is the thing. You do this with Anthony Hopkins.

It's silent. of the lamp. It is. Silence of the lambs is this but murder instead of theft. Doro against us. And Anthony Hopkins. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. It's really good. But she completes this obstacle course and he's still, he's still mean to her about it. He's like, well, you know, you're not that good, right? And she correctly calls him out. She says, you know what, Mac? I think you're just afraid to be nice to me. Because if you admit that you're nice.

This is the essence. Because if you're nice to me, you'll realize that you want this fucking pussy and we'll just have like crazy old-man age gap. This is the essence of the sexy man. Yeah. This is what. this is what the, this is what it's all about, right? Is this is how you write this shit.

This is the fantasy is the guy who is so into you that he can only express it by being mean to. Yeah. Right. Because he is terrified and vulnerable. I mean, like, downstream of this is all the like, all the fucking romantic, well, like, beauty in the beast and like, whale wolf boyfriend shit. And then, like, you're wearing a plastic dress in a world with a dangerous crowboy whose job is to destroy plastic. But we're, like, downstream of all this is all this, like, fucking. Romantically slop that we're stuck in now.

And like, here we see, it used to be good. The Beast brings beauty to his mission hub, right? Like, this is a key aspect of how this is supposed to go down. You bring her to your mission hub. You, you, like, train her in the ways of, like, your sort of, like, thing. And then you're relentlessly hostile and cruel and disregarding to her. But it's not because you're not thinking about her. It's because you're thinking about her too much.

And you don't trust yourself. The dark fuck prince. Yes. He's fourth wing. He's a crown of thorns and roses. He's an X of Y and Z. Yeah. But Brackett's good.

Yeah. And then because he's been mean to her, and it's Christmas, remember, because it's nearly the millennium, he gets her a present. He gives her a dress in a box. She doesn't yet try it on. We'll get to my thoughts on the dress. He says, in a sort of like protesting too much way, says, well, surely not for me.

Which, okay. Sure, thought. It would be cool if it was, though, if you ever wanted to try that, actually. Introducing a new dynamic into our relationship. I'm joking, actually, just kidding. I've wasted 60 years of my life, not taking the yesterday. There's still time. This is instantly sucking all the fun out of it by being like, yeah, when you're trans, right, there is a special cursed dynamic, which is you think you're getting the sexy old man.

And then the sexy old man reveals a little too much, and you're like, oh, this is tragic now. Oh, no. And then you can't just hard drop them and walk out either. Like, you're the bad guy if you do that. Yeah, yeah. It's like abandoning a sort of progeria, like, gozzling, duckling. I just, listen, here's the thing, right? If you're going to pull the, like, older man seduction thing, please, please, be really, really confident about your gender, right?

just do that first because, because like, yeah. If you transition, right, I don't care if you're 70. I don't care if you're 80, right? If you're an 80-year-old trans woman and you're like, I want to take you to my mission hub, my vampire castle, and teach you my ways, I will help you break both hips. I genuinely, like, I will, I will help you to, I will be the cause of a life-changing fall injury if you need me to be.

I'd like, anything, but like, if, if, if, if you're going to, like, Take the old man sex away from me and go, actually, I've been having some thought, no, don't have those thoughts, please, because I can't do this again, you know? No, but your fantasy is the wrong way around. You need to be taking beautiful younger Catherine Zeta Jones women to your mission hub. I mean, I'm trying to do that too. You've got to be the Sean Connery. I'm trying to be the Sean Connery I want to see in the world. It's only safe to be the younger party. in the dangerous age gap relationship.

You're blameless in that. That's true. That's true. They'll get you. Disagree? No, no, no. That's not what I think. That's what society thinks.

If I get out there, if I get out there on the podcast and say, come to my mission hub, even if I am the type of woman to be inviting people to my mission hub, right? Like, then it's weird. Right? And you, like, it's, I, uh, yes. I need to be pursued. I'm the older person. Sometimes you get up been pursued by somebody who's a little bit younger than you and that's fine, okay?

Like, it's okay. I'm willing to bear my breast and my heart to the world and say, yes, it is okay to be the older partner in an age gap relationship. It's even okay to be that when the age gap relationship is frankly a little bit troubling, right? It's okay to be the old man and the old man. sex, that's fine. That's good even because like where it's like a crucial natural resource that the old men... Well, I want some of them to be doing it. Exactly. Exactly. It needs to be happening. Right? Like this is the thing. This is the long arc of aging, right? Is you have your kind of, you have your twink death. You have your kind of trans grief. And then you come out of at the other side trying to invite people to the mission hub. Right? That's how it's supposed to be. I'm hitting this sort of butterfly talking to the lover. Like we're supposed to be the old. in an age gap relationship. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then you watch them do something really physically impressive that, you know, it's maybe some kind of athletic sport, and it's fine, and it's great, okay? You're allowed to do this. Remembering that this isn't a bonus episode and ending my life instantly. This has a bonus episode energy because we recorded a bonus episode with a guest

that was just straight down the line, nice and professional, Then we come on here and we're like, what's good? Age gap relationships. Tell me you don't remember 9-11. That's fine. You don't have to remember 9-11 to get this. Fine.

I had to explain it the other day. Do you explain it? No, no, no, no, not explaining neither, but, you know. Yeah, yeah, I was going to. I was just like, we're from first principles. Okay, all right. No, no, obviously not from first principles. But, you know, the question came up of what that was like.

I'm just out here, you know? I'm just buying Twink's dresses. I'm willing to do that. I was like, imagine two really big Charlie Kirk's, okay? People carried that flame for much, much longer. Okay, okay. If you're really upset about it. Anyway, the dress doesn't look very good.

The dress is crazy, right? Because it's kind of, you know that, what's that one thing? What's that one movie where they put a white girl in a weirdly Asian dress, like a kind of hamburger chantsom? It's like that. Like, it looks... You're thinking of Mary Jane and the first Sam Ramey Spider-Man. Thank you. Yes, I am.

Yes, yes, yes. Yes, let's go. It is the hamburger chung-sum. When we finally see her in the dress a bit later on, it doesn't fit. It's too baggy in the arms and it's too tight across the front. It's this fucking shit dress. It's awful. It was for Sean Connery, you know?

Well, he kind of brags about getting her the wrong size, right? Like, he repeats the line that Wingraim's used earlier of like, she's a six, but she'd look good enough for. Yeah. Sure, man. Yeah. Before she gets his dress, she's like, I didn't get you a Christmas present. I got to go into town and get you something. And she calls her boss at the insurance company, but he's bugged the phone.

So he hears her planning to betray him. My favorite detail about this is that they could get him now, but her boss, Hector, is like, no, that's not enough. We got to, or rather, she, she, too, her boss is like, that's not enough. I got to keep in on this thing so that we can get him 25 to life. This man is 60 years old. Yeah. It's life, man, no matter what.

He's like, we could come and arrest him right now. She's like, no, I haven't fucked him yet. I mean, no, we've got to catch him red-handed. Yeah, I haven't sealed the deal on this yet. Hold on, hold on. You know that one John Kariaki TikTok group where he's like, let's go up on the roof? It's a nice day.

It's come up on the roof. Get up on the fucking roof. He has left her a note on the sort of whiskey decanter that says, like, you know, get up on the fucking roof. So she comes up on the roof and he's there waiting with a glass of whiskey. And he's like, I'm going to kill you. Which is another key aspect of the Tumblr sexy man is you know that they could. It is.

It is. He goes, I never come up here without throwing something off. insane roof maintenance program on this. Yeah, it's like, done. He like drops the glass of whiskey down onto the rocks below or it shatters, and I'm like, that's not how whiskey stones work. But it's really... I'm the dark fuck prince.

I'm the evil raven boy. Reach plastic, and I'm... A key aspect of the dark fuck prince is that he has to threaten credibly to kill you, but for like an excusable plot reason. Like, you have to have wrong... Or there has to be some kind of misunderstanding and he has to be like, well, normally I would kill you, but I'm not going to because of question mark, right? Like something intercedes.

And that way, the girlies who are all about getting killed, right, by the old man, they get their sort of box ticked, right? And the girlies who just want to be romanced by the old man get the box ticked of like, where he could do, he's so dangerous. But he's so safe. Exactly. No, you're exactly right. You're the first dragon rider to have two dragons.

That's crazy. Anyway, they go to the mask ball. I would love to go to the mask ball. Me at the mask ball. Where are they? Me at the mask ball. I'm straining it like a full-body leash, like a fucking sensory-issued toddler. It's not good.

They're having a hole, babe. What the fuck? Anyway. You know the photo of Trump? After they shot part of his ear off where he's like coming out from under the pile of secret service agents, that's me at the mask ball. How about this? Me at the mask ball. Real. That's a heavy inhale.

Long sleeve. I don't get it, but okay. They're there to scope out the venue anyway. One key aspect of masquerade balls is that they are Venetian and the, you know, they're not. The mask here is Chinese. Shit? And look shits, yes. Every mask involved is bad.

First of all, it's not really a masquerade ball. People aren't really wearing masks. Half the guests aren't in masks. Yeah. And then the actual mask itself looks like a giant. No, the one that's there to steal looks great, but the one Katha Mjana Zeta Jones is wearing, it's like shit. And so does her dress. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. She does look awful in this, which is a real shame. She's the only one mask. Because you're having to work hard. Yeah. Mm. Yeah. We haven't got enough, like,

We haven't got enough good fits on Catherine Cedar Jones yet. We'll get that. No, no. But so he walks her through. They plant that little equipment and then they get in that night by water with a very not sure on Connery. But here's the thing. He's old. And I also think after having done Bond and especially Connery's run of Bond, you are entitled to be like, I never want to scuba dive again.

Yeah. I've done enough scuba diving on film. Thank you. I've seen everything that's down that, I've always. I've already seen it. It's fucking bullshit. I've completed. I don't like this one. Skip it. Skip it.

Skip it. Skip it. He has to wedge himself into the suit from Thunderball. And now it's like, no. No, I don't do that anymore. I'm not doing a scene. I'm going to do this one. They break through the floor perfectly. I love, again, this is a very device.

This is a very contraption, heavy heist. Love that. Huge love that. Can we talk about the fits on the security guards? because someone has been through and dressed these British security guards so Americanly that each of them looks like a Chicago cop. And it's so funny to me. Yeah, it's crazy.

They got the big fur collar and shit, and we don't have that over here. No. I've gotten a fucking art museum over here. Fantastic. Oh. That was trying to get at these Chinese masks. So they punch up through the floor, like that one communist, the illustration.

Timed to... This entire plan hinges on the accuracy of an old grandfather clock, which is... Interesting. Good point. Also, she meanwhile was trying to get the old grandfather finished the... That's not talking about. Yeah. Nice.

He talks her through it, right? She does the laser tripwire routine. We've seen lots of takes on this, right? We've seen Oceans 11's take on this with Vancell Cassell. Yeah. fun of it. It's hot, I'm afraid. It's... This is... If you're the first to do it, you get to do it unironically and it gets to be good.

Yeah. This is fantastic. I love this scene. Because you don't see the lasers because they're fucking lasers. She's just in the middle of the room doing the dance routine. Yeah. Lots of good girls in this as well. Yeah. We're playing up the youthful thing because she has a thing of chewing gum, which she uses as the pressure switch neutralization device, which is cute.

Yeah. Yeah. It's very sweet. Like, sticks it over the pressure switch at the end when she takes the mask. And then she has to do the whole routine backwards in 30 seconds before the guard gets back. Yeah. It's cute.

Yeah. Yeah. But so they get out. And here is where I write down one of the other things about the dark fuck prints, right? Is romance, in my experience, I'll teach you sort of young people some knowledge here. Romance is mostly about like drowning each other. or threatening each other with knives

or saying things like, please come with me to Kuala Lumpur. If you've got all three of those, you're basically golden. Yeah, that's like first base, yeah. Yeah, so they get back to the boat and Connery goes, you work for Hector Cruz at Waverly Insurance, don't you?

Yeah, you've been on me this whole time. Starts drowning. She goes, whoa. He grabs her by the hair and pulls her hair. Might not say he grabs up by the hair, pulls her hair. Yes, please. Yes, please.

And she's like, no, honest, I need you for another job. It's a billion-dollar job. It's a billion-dollar heist. I'm actually a criminal. I just work as the insurance as a cover. And then I like this because there's a moment of like, it's not just here. It doesn't have mercy.

It's like competence. While she's under the water, she pulls a hidden knife. And then when he brings her back up, she puts the knife to his throat. So they're like, oh, they're nice. They're on like an equal. It's really good. And she's like, come with me to Malaysia and I will get you a billion-dollar heist. and he's like, oh, shit, she got a knife.

I'm kind of into that shit, actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. So, she takes him to Malaysia, right? And the deal is she is going to do the scam from office space, which is crazy. Yeah. She takes him to her mission hub, which I love. Yes.

Which is an empty shithole. Well, she hasn't done any missions. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, she's at the start, right? So she's got a view of the International Clearance Bank. all the big money transactions in Southeast Asia go through that building. Only one guy has access to the central computer.

We've already kind of control C, control V'd his eyes. So we've got like, we've copied his eyes so we can steal his retinal scan and shit. They are running drills for Y2K. So just before the millennium turns over, there's going to be a 30 second computer window. Plus I've done some clocks magic to get this extra 10 seconds.

We've got a 40 second window to upload this CD which contains a program, which will tell the computer to take like pennies from every account all the way over South East Asia, transfer it into my bank account stealing $8 billion, but we have to do it tomorrow night just before the new year. Yeah, this can only be done exactly on a millennium. Another kind of flirtation where he's like, yeah, why it can't be done until she goes, what if I split the proceeds 50, 50 with you? And then he's like, well, it's impossible, but do it for.

Which? Fun, cute. She's like, everyone says, you're the greatest. thief of all time? No, actually, it is, it is I who will be the greatest thief of all time after I have done this. It's like, oh, shit, okay. And we see, we see the desire, the desire building between them. I, so, like, oh my God. So, they, they, they, they, stake out the thing a bit. It's the, the Petronus towers, right? We're, we're familiar with them, right? But, like, after that, she goes to bed, he's up late, and he sees her lying on her side,

and I write down and he thinks, how is she shaped that way? Catherine Ziza Jones's hips. It's crazy what's going on. Gender dysphoria. I... She's gone to bed. She's sleeping naked again.

And he goes up to her. And she's pretending to be asleep. She's like sleeping naked with her back to him. This is no, but pretend to be a sleep thing that's smart. This is skills. This is skills. And like he lifts, he takes a blanket and he like pulls the blanket over her shoulder. He still won't do it.

And she's like, Fuck, come on! What do I have to do? I love this kind of seduction temptation thing. There's a film called Ammonite that really people really don't like because it's kind of like remembered as being like a worse version of portrait of a lady on fire. But I really like it, which has an age gap lesbian relationship in which the tech here is... Damn, that's crazy. Yeah, it's really good.

But the tech is, oh, I just have to like sit here and take off my shoes and socks. Like in front of this older woman Damn, that's crazy It is crazy work And I love that for a piece of character development Of just like, yeah, no, I know exactly what I'm doing With the seduction thing It's good, it's good

Sean Connery's just oblivious Sean Conroy at this point is thinking like, I think maybe this girl likes me Nah, it couldn't be Yeah, he's staying loyal to his vow His thief's code of not doing old man sex I mean, I think it's also worth noting here We talk about post-Bond careers.

This is a real difference, right? Roger Moore bailed out of Bond in part because it was getting to old man sex, right? Connery, was not only here for the old man sex, he was so here for the old man sex that he stayed in the old man sex zone for more old man sex. He quit Bond to focus full time on old man sex. Yeah. Yeah. The thing about Bond was they kept pretending that he was young.

And what I really like about this film is like, the age gap is like, texture. actually part of it. He keeps... It's like saying stuff like, you know, your life is ahead of you or just like, you know, you can still do this stuff and I can't. And it's like, actually, this is part of the appeal. It's nice. I like it. Just to make this even more sort of like nakedly a sex thing, a love triangle specifically, Ving Rames grabs Sean Connery and goes, hey, man, I've been having some thoughts about the nature of our polycule here.

Specifically, the line is, I think it's time to take your... girlfriend out of the equation and take things back to the you and me of it all. Like, hmm. The, hey, have you ever considered closing our relationship conversation? Hmm. Hot. I mean. It is.

Possessive? Sexy? He says, you change partners. You change the rules. So, Ving Rames has been reading Polysecure, first of all. Mm-hmm. Ethical slut. She's gone to see Green to give him the remembrance.

Brand and the mask, but Sean Connery has stolen the mask. And so he's like, Sean Connery's double fucking crossed you. Get the fuck out, right? And so when Connery gets back to the flat later on, she's really upset and she beats his ass with a shoe. Yeah.

She's like, why did you betray me? Turn the tables on him. Yeah. Get in with the shoe. He's brought the mask back because she's like, why, you took it to sell it? Why didn't you? He's like, I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it. I wanted to see if you. I couldn't do it. I wanted to see if you could do it. I wanted to see if I could do it, which is good. Vulnerability, very important.

Yes. And one of the other things is this conversation happens after he has pinned her to the floor because one of the other things about romance is it's about being forcibly restrained until you calm down. That's just fact. Here's another key point here. He's also lying. Yes. He's just gone to see Ving Rames with the mask and gone, all right, here's the mask. I'm done. getting out of this shit. This is stupid. And Vingrays is gone, no. This heist shit sounds cool. I want to see what happens.

They really linger on the shot of like his hand, like one of his hands covering both of her wrists, just a really like, like, the size difference as well as the age difference. I... Listen, it hits. I've been blessed with like skinny wrists and like it's, you know, every day I'm down on my knees, thanking God and other people. But so he is like... And six foot one and very strong.

I get it. Damn, that's crazy. So I, um... And I'm Devin. Hi, Devin. Hi, Devin. Hi, Devin. I can't do this.

I swore an oath, speaking of which, you know, it would be weird between us. It would ruin the podcast. Well, I was going to say, like, he's in a very difficult situation because he has to go back there and be like, I didn't double-cross you, but he does have working for him the fact that she is experiencing psychosovo- at this point. I believe that she's completely invincible. Fully just accepts that this is what's happening. She's like, yeah, he's back, we're going to have sex, we're going to do the crime, it's going to be amazing.

Yeah. But it doesn't work. There's a moment where she kisses him. It's just a quick peck of gratitude. But then there's this moment of like, oh, that threshold has been crossed. She didn't have done that. And she grabs it. She grabs and kisses him.

And he's the one who resist and has to resist by like pinning her wrist and be like, no, no. I can't do it. I'm conscious that I'm actually blushing as I say this, but to sort of like put a couple of cards on the table. So I went to this disco alesium lup. And one of the things that I did there was in character role playing, falling in love with an old man who was going to betray me. And it hits.

It quite simply hits. It's a hell of an experience. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's good. You know, he's sort of like, I think, almost sort of like internally wondering whether or not to warn her off. He says, my situation is so complicated, I can't explain to which I write down. Just show you a pussy, man.

She'll figure it out. Like, she's not going to, she's been this far with you. She's not going to get transphobic on you now, you know? Pierce Brosnan would be old enough to do this now. Yeah, yeah. This is really good. I love this acting. This whole scene is like really, really well, I said.

And she is, she is down outrageous. She is wriving as he's pitting her wrist. You're like, no, like, we can't have checks right now. I'm telling you we can't have sex. I can't have sex with you, Catherine, Gina Jones. I can't believe I'm saying it either, but it's not going to happen. Yeah, it's one of the, one of the hotter things to be like, we can't have sex, but I really want to. So she gets lightly kidnapped.

But meanwhile, someone is watching you through a camera. And taking photos. The cuckold Ving Rhames. Yes. Gotcha, baby. And this is where we're. we finally get her in a good fit because the next time we see her, Oh, it's so good.

Three quarter length linen coat over white top and tiny sunglasses and tan trousers. Fucking cunt. And the sunglasses have come back around to the point when these are now pretty contemporary. This is like what people are wearing now sunglasses? And it's like, oh yeah, we've come back around. It's good. It's good. Now we finally have her in a good fit.

This morning we see Connery leave and go and mark the ground at the train station. Huh. We don't know what he's doing right yet. Do we... Wow. Okay. I had no idea. It's there. That's crazy. That's really good. I know. That changes something. Oh, that's fantastic.

Which I'll yell about later on. Okay. So, she gets lightly kidnapped by Hector's goons, right? And Hector, I love the way that this guy plays this. I love this character because he is so in love with her and so... It's so good. ...wounded and it... Listen, one of the other things, and this also relates to my love, because I was also doing

this with the old man sex arc. I love it when a handler to an agent is like, you had me so worries, don't ever do that to me again. Magical. It's really nice. Magical. Yeah. Like, I... His whole thing is just like, okay, so you told me you're going to get him during the mask heist. I see that the mask heist has gone off and I don't hear from you. Naturally, I've started calling hospitals, morgues, and then finally the airport. He's just, he's so disappointed.

angry because this was like a, he was worried about her because he loves her. Like, I, Hector, I have a lot of feelings about Hector in this movie. I, I want to read some fucking, like, Tumblr fan fiction about Hector. I, yeah, there's an interesting sort of like, Hector's interesting. Very, very interesting. This is something like, kill James Bond working recent shit out on the podcast episode, which like, I like it. I like it.

I'm never not doing that is the secret about me, but it's definitely a, Like, Kill James Bond after duck, you know? Normally we save this for behind the paywall. This is, you're lucky. This is a preview. You swap the order. Yeah, no, no, no. If you've not subscribed to the Patreon, it's like that behind.

This is what you're missing. We're all talking about old man sex, yeah. Yeah, we're all giving strong hints on how you could seduce each one of us. Yeah, absolutely. That's something if you're interested, patreon.com, kill James Bond. Here is a list of my weaknesses and here is a. copy of that list of weaknesses in case you accidentally throw the list in the trash has an air of desperation

to it, you know? We all just really kind of giving it away, yeah, yeah. Give it it away. But she maintains that she's like, no, I'm just deep cover. I'm really, really deep cover, actually. And at this point, he pulls out the 8 by 10 black and white glossies of them cuddling and, like, restraining her on the floor from last night.

And I'm like, these days, if you want to show somebody compromise. You don't have the printed out physical black and white photos. I know. This is like, HD caught you in 4K on a phone. I'm like, that's not as good. The limitations of the medium are what make you miss it. You're so right. It's really fun to imagine being in the dark room just like, be like, this bitch, I've got you. Yeah. It takes a while, man. Just probably heard that in the kind of Dennis Reynolds, like, yeah. But so he, she, she talks a way out of it, right? And, and so,

We go to the heist, right? She comes out of the thing, having made the trade for the stuff she needs with Conrad Green. She fans herself evilly. And Sean Connery, she's in the car with him. He is dressed as the one white maintenance guy in Malaysia, which I think would not be a great cover, but whatever. This dress that she's wearing right now, the dark blue? Way better. The dark blue with the strappy straps, way better.

Really nice, because she chose it and set up trouble. It's her heist. Another sort of canonical point of the dark. fuck prince. He's like, visibly like, we should talk about this. I should make some kind of confession here, but he's, she's like, no, you know? Keep it professional.

Not yet. Yeah. He slips his tail as well. After the he hike, we fuck. So they have to, they have to, like, he disables some stuff. He changes into, like, a normal old man outfit. We see that Hector is there. He just the James Bond thing where

he takes off the meeting itself and he's got a suit underneath, like, bada-da. Yeah, that's cool. He'd be so hot though. He'd be so warm. Like, this suit, I'm drool. In Malaysia? So many layers, man.

Yeah. Yeah. But so Hector is now... The suit would get all crumpled? He's in the command center monitoring the situation. The command cock chair, right, with the cops and the security guys. And he's like, you know, show time. Yeah, it's nice.

He goes in there and he's like, all right, I'm an insurance agent. Everybody clear the room. It's time for them. And they go, yes, instead of what. Like, yeah, great. Yeah, they just go absolutely, sir. Fine, whatever. The racial sort of semiotics of that, let's say, problematic.

But so he disables the cameras, right? And they have to get through like a corridor. There's a second laser scene, a less remembered one. But this one, it's like, because they flash in a rhythm, they have to like dance through it together. Yeah, yeah. She is in front of him. Catherine Zita Jones rips off her cunty dress to reveal a second cuntier jumpsuit underneath it.

It's like blue and sparkly. She's facing away from him, right? He's behind her and we see her smile, the smile. She's like, this is... She's doing great. When it's all falling into fucking place, that's the smile she's got right now. It's a little bit of like old man sex victory and it's a little bit of like auto-hybristophilia, you know?

It's like, I do you imagine yourself doing heists when you masturbate, which the answer is yes. I thought it's... Imagine yourself Irish. Let me put this to you. Let me put this to you. Old Hugh Grant. I mean, look, I like Old Hugh Grant. I'm on record.

We will do the Dungeons of Dragons movie that he's in. Old Hugh Grant and you make it gay. Old Hugh Grant's in a twink. Okay, all right, now you're cooking. Okay. It's also like that people have admitted that he's gay. Camp Miasma is the old, is the kind of a gay version of this movie, but where they're both just kind of like nice and into it?

This was my other thought is, If we have to gender swap this, right, which we should. Okay, yeah, you would need a SWAT team to hold Hannah Eind by and the back from the Catherine Reza-Jones role, right? But I'm prepared to do that. But Gillian Anderson in this would be incredible. Sorry. Could be a younger man, could be a younger woman. I think it's better as a woman, but like...

Yeah, I mean, that is just can't be asked me, yeah. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. But so... Orney Weaver. Anyway. They get into the vault, which... which is a very like future tech. Yeah, she has to use some like,

cunty little virtual reality goggles to like hack into the fucking mainframe or whatever. And then it's like the Y2K, the midnight is approaching and they do the countdown and then they press the button just in time and they transfer $8 billion. Happy New Year! Kiss, really nice.

Yay. Conray is doing a bunch of Seinfeld bits about how banks don't have money in them anymore as well. Yeah. There used to be a big room full of gold barge. A Korean man with a hat with trying to do you in a judge. You can shut your watchtorn.

I was stuck in there out of the electrician. It was crazy. But then the alarm goes off and the door starts closing and Connery goes, I wish my Sean Indiana Joon Shush is here. He's really good with closing doors. Yeah, they escape just about. I do like that Southeast Asia, right, between the Bajinka plot in Indonesia and here in Malaysia, really just the crimes of the 90s that ended up defining

the 2000s because there you had like the prefiguration of 9-11. Here you have the prefiguration of the 2008 financial crisis. Just my thought. Anyway, we learned some fact about the... They wind up stuck on the 50th... Oh, do we? Yeah, well, we learned some facts about the Malaysian police

and their lack of hesitation to let it bark because as they're escaping and they get stuck, we see a cop just in the opposite tower across the Skybridge who immediately fires a grenade launcher at them. Just great. That's crazy.

Mm-hmm. Across the sky room. Luckily, it's not loaded with explosives, but with friend of the show, gas. Yeah. And then Sean Connery suggests, well, they're not going to be expecting us to just tank the gas. So let's just walk through the gas. They'll think we'll go the other way to the gas. So we just go through the gas.

This is another like blindfolded moving through a space scene, you know. Yeah. Yeah. It gets some breath play where you have to hold your breath. Yeah. He like smashes out the hole in the window. Yeah, like, hold her head next to the hole in the window. so she can read.

I went to a sort of three-hit combo here where I described this in my notes as the oxygen glory hole. And then I went, I guess that's all glory holes. And then I went, or I guess all holes. So just go about the world now with the kind of platonic knowledge that every hole bigger than an oxygen molecule is an oxygen glory hole.

Yes. Yes. He smashed the window. Yes. And they have to escape out onto the skybridge. Connecting the Seasouse. Yeah, they have to type rope walk across the lights. You know the Sky Bridge is going to happen.

A lot of the shots earlier on, they were looking at the Sky Bridge. Yeah, they do this cool, like, type rope walking sequence and then the cables break and it's really good. Yeah, yeah. They have to like swing and then climb up the pillar. It's good. It's good. It's decent.

You go, like, no one saw this. She does get a little bit woman helpless here, but... She does, she does, yeah. I think it's, I think that's kind of... necessary at this point to the arc, right? To the whole dark fuck prince romance is she has to get in over her head, right? And he has to be the one to save her because he really cares, right? So we'll get there.

Yeah, which he does by kind of like sacrificing himself a little bit. There's only like one mini parachute that she can use to get down. He's like, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. I'll meet you at 6.30 tomorrow. The same situation if I'm late, it's because I'm dead. Mulling this, right? If we're doing lesbian entrapment, there is.

is no reason you couldn't get Catherine Zeta Jones back. That would be really fun, actually. Do you know who I'm casting in the sort of junior role? Me? Me? Yes. Is it me? Is it me?

I was going to say, I was going to say Rose Leslie, actually. Because that's, I mean, you as well, obviously, both of us. I want us to be happy. I might be too jacked to play that kind of role convincing me right now. Wait, no, I know. Nicole Bates! I've just found out who Rose Leslie is. I agree completely.

You're so right. No, it should be Nicole made. So it's just. Catherine Zeta Jones, did you think younger Catherine Zeta Jones? So, like, she leaves him up there with, like, the Malaysian cops. No, that's what I call autogynophilia. Who we know are gonna, like, they're emoting on his old man corpse right now. They're doing him Pablo Escobar style.

Like, it's not. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's a shame. Mm-hmm. So she goes to the station the next day, and it passes the time. If I'm late, I'm dead. Yeah, 6.30 passes. Oh, no.

It's a test to see if she still cares. It's the Thomas Crown Affair thing. Again, it's like, you test the sincerity. That's a key sort of aspect of this kind of romance. Weirdly, he is dressed like an Iranian diplomat. He's wearing the white collarless shirt and the khaki suit. He's dressed like an Iranian politician. Yeah, very strange. I don't know. Why is he dressed like that? He arrives late But he is here And so is Ving Rames Who's like hello I'm Ving Rames FBI Fing Rames FBI

You are under arrest You're under Thanks Mac He was playing you Because this was He's like What was this What was the title of the movie

Dev? I think it was something like What I said this is called entrapment Yes it is That is what this was It has been entrapment For you

You've been tired. You were the one doing the entrapment. Yeah. Yes. He says the FBI caught me a few years ago. I cut them a deal, which is I stay out of old man prison in exchange for helping them catch you. Great. And she's like, you.

Motherfucker. And he's like, yes, indeed. I gave them everything. I gave them the mask. I gave them the Rembrandt. And all seven billion dollars. Yeah. She's like, really?

All 7 billion? He's like, yes. And then he puts a, he gets one minute with her, right? To say, get his good back. Yeah. He's like, in your right pocket is a passport, a visa and some money. And in your left pocket is a gun. Take me hostage, jump on the train and run.

She's like, no. I'm walking her over. I still haven't had the old man sex. No, for the dick. I'm here for the dick. Yeah, did you put that in the pocket as well? Mm-hmm. And so she, she, he's like, no, you have to leave me.

And as time is up, she, like, takes him hostage and sort of, like, gets onto the train. Poor fucking Hector, my God, like a Javert with no, like, no closure whatsoever. He's, like, chasing her down the platform. He's got her at gunpoint, but he can't do it because he loves her. And it's just, oh, my God. Hector, dude. Will Patton in his fucking movie. At no point does anyone say this man is an insurance agent.

Why does he have a gun? Businessman. I, he just... If you used to work for the FBI, you work with the FBI. Yeah, all the time. He's also like, he's, to be fair, Ving Rames is an FBI guy and we've seen this insurance. We've seen Hector like pushing Ving around in one scene that they had together.

Yeah, true, true. He's definitely still with the other business. Yeah, still with the FBI, yeah. Oh, fucking hector. But so. or like, yeah. So we end up with Ving Rames settling things with Sean Connery, right? And first of all, we get another thing from Takey Power 1,23, where he just goes,

hope she was worth it. And he immediately goes, yeah, she was, need to be spoken on this way. Need to be someone's, she was worth it, you know? Yeah, yeah. But because he stole the fucking platinum chips earlier, he bought her way out. So the FBI's in on it, too, the whole time. So there was no reason to do this other than. an aura farming.

Yeah, Ving Grames is at least. Because Ving Grimes is like, well, we could just pick her up at the next station or, you know, maybe we'll miss her and Sean Curry is like, here's the stolen computer chips, there's a bribe to let her go. And then, okay, fine. Vingrams is like, all right, buddy. It's time for me to leave the movie. Genuinely, really beautiful, long shot of Sean Connery sat sitting there thinking.

Good. He's fucking good when he wants to be, man. He's a good actor. He's a good actor. It's really nice. Just meditating on. the loss of the whole thing. But he smiles to himself.

Even when she's about to get on the train, it's like, you've got your whole life ahead if you run, I'm 65, but my dick don't work no more. I can be doing this. You get on the train. You run away. And we get this moment where he thinks himself

and he's like, yes, she was worth it. I wish I'd managed to get that incredible pushy, which I'm sure is fantastic, but it's still not good enough for me. You look beautiful today, Pam. Jason Borns him. I was going to say she reversed. Jason Borns him.

the train goes by and she's back there again on the other platform. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, I guess sometimes you can't, you can't get the beautiful younger woman. Oh, wait, never mind, yes, I can. Oh, all right. She's back.

His face in this moment is so fucking good. Like, he's never been taken by surprise anything the whole movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Gob-smacked right there. It's so good. It's so good. Yeah, it's really nice.

And, of course, the train goes by, and the expectation here is, he is going to Jason-born her. They are going to have been a sort of Jason-born for Jason-born relationship, like where he's going to disappear behind the train and then be right behind her. And I love that they deflace it because the next shot is him by the stairs. And he is visibly out of breath.

My heart! He's just re-legged it the whole way. I don't know. It is nice. It's really sweet that he tried to Jason Bourne her. It's just like a little bit too small. Do you believe that love is possible with an old man in this world? because I do.

And it's just... Maybe they've made me believe it. They've made me believe in love. They made believe... I must say, like, watching Camiasma and then this, there's been a real theme to my work lately. Old man sex. Old man sex.

It just, like... Old man sex. Old man sex. Come on, Abby. Old man sex. Old man sex. All right, okay. It's a happy ending.

And then... It's a happy ending. And then she says, What was 9-11? What was that about? And he looks at her and he prepares to like imbue her with all the wisdom of age and experience and he says, watch any movie free online at. Openshundical.com.

com. Oh. Kill James Bond. God damn. That's the fucking movie. I love this movie. This was so good. It's really good. It's weirdly hot. I, yeah. What does this say about masculinity?

See, all the familiar stuff, we've been talking about it the whole way through, right? To be, to be a sexy older man, you have to be like dangerous but safe at the same time, right? And you have to be like, oh, I could kill you, but I'm not going to, though. You'd be like, oh, I don't want to have sex with you, but I do want to, though. That kind of stuff. It's tension. It's about the tension. It's the vulnerability as well. Yeah. There isn't as sexy. They don't have sex.

that we see, presumably they do now go to a hotel and like, fuck, like crazy. Yeah, something at least. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, like, you know, it's nice, actually, the what does it is his, is his vulnerability and the fact that she sees through the defense as he puts in front of it is really nice. Yeah, it's good. I like it. Yeah, yeah.

And the lesson here is... I can see why all these women get addicted to vertical microdramas about this shit now. You are never too old to have sex, is the thing, you know? And that's real. That's facts. Or to be sexy. To be sexy. That's so real.

Absolutely. You know, I hope I'm 69 years old still doing this shit, you know? I hope I'm taking women to my mission hub, you know? It's like, for all of this, really. I hope we all have this, you know? Yeah. Kill James Bond, official endorsement of age gap relationships. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Of course. Of course. I've, yeah. I got, yeah. Approved.

Send it out the door. I was 19, you know, fucking dating 14, 15 years older than me. Absolutely. Of course. Were you? Wow, you never told us that? No, I just, yeah. I didn't know that about you.

Well, I can do that. That's maybe a little bit. When I was a young woman and before that when I was a young gay boy, I was, I was into some situations. I was fucking the types of people who listened to Classic FM. And you know what? legitimately, authentically, no regret. It's good. So, you know, Hannah Einbinder, she thinks she's the only one to do it.

She's not, you know? I've only ever had one, like, proper age gap experience with an old man. That was at uni. He was in a hotel. Very nice. Yeah. I mean, the thing is sometimes they consider it. The only time I dated somebody who was significantly older than me, that was very very bad.

But, you know, I learned some good lessons. There are good relationships and good hookups and bad relationships. and bad hookups, and I feel like age, it doesn't really correlate, you know? Like, I've, yeah, it just doesn't. So, the energy's just got to be there. Yeah, you just got to, you just got to, you just got to, all I'm saying is it's all love at kill James Bond, and you've got to love each other, right? You got to, you got to, you got to, with your, within the bounds of the law.

Yes, of course. You should understand everything that we're saying to be, like, you know, as consenting adults. I would have hoped that would have been, like, unnecessary to include. Just making sure we get that for the people on Tumblr, you know it is necessary. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Listen, those people aren't insult yet. That's fine. That's like, by the same process that it's like unethical and like illegal to like have sex with them,

it's also like annoying and unethical and unprofitable to have discourse with them, right? So if you're that kind of person, don't, don't engage us in conversation about this. It's not for you. If someone's angry with me on Tumblr. I'm not going to find out about it. This is for people who are, you know, capable now of realizing that you get, as far as we know, unless you want to get a bit Buddhist with it, one go at this and you should use that time to live and love as fully as possible.

And so you got to fuck the old man. We don't have to talk about trust. We have to trust that our listeners are mature enough to understand that in this life, this kind of shit is hot. Yes, yes. You'll fuck the old man. Yeah, entrapment is really hot. official position.

That's the position. As you say, we don't have to be subjective about this. No, no, because we have a science-based system. It's called the scum system. It stands a smarm. Cultural insensitivity. Unnecessary violence and misogyny.

I always love the little hitch before unnecessary now. I like the hitch, yeah. On a scale of zero to seven, how smarmy is entrapment. It's a difficult one. I think it is strange. It's a difficult one. Fuck, because it's quite sincere, is it. It is.

It is. It is. I think the essence, this is going to, S is, S is going to fuck us when we get to romance season because the essence of romance is sincerity, right? And it's about that kind of openness and vulnerability, right? So it has to be low, right? There's a lot of bullshit getting there, but that's part of the fun, the flirtation, right? So like the, it's like a, like a tonal language, it's like a rising falling tone, right? Like the, the, so this mom has to go up and that has to go way down. And so I still feel like this is like a... It's also got a lot of

nice little details in it, like the first. that Hector's in love with her, which pays off the earlier bit about him being kind of of flirty in the office in a way that I really like, doesn't telegraph its moves? But it's making some sophisticated fucking moves in a way that I like. So I think it's going to be a lowest mom's score. I could go like a two or a three. I want to give it like a two, yeah. I also want to give Hector, not any of our medals, but just like an actual medal, like an order of Lennon as a character. Yeah, just being vulnerable and putting himself out there and being sort of

openly in love with someone because that's a beautiful thing and even when it doesn't work out. I encourage this. It's brave. We'll give him the good night for that. If he's going above and beyond in the name of the good night, yeah. Yeah, it's a good night for us. Absolutely. That's so

romantic. To have someone be like, I'm so in love with you that I'm not going to shoot you. Even when you're like, I'm going to fuck this old man instead, I'm going to like ruin your whole life. It doesn't matter. It doesn't even matter how these things work out to still love someone, and that's incredible. So, yeah, two. Cultural incensitivity. I mean, Malaysia is not like a place, really. It's an exotic

destination. Yeah, that's true. It could be anywhere. They could be doing this a droid witch, basically. Like, it's... Yeah. Yeah. But again, I'm willing to believe that, because if they're only going there, because that's where the bank is. Yeah. Yeah, that's fair. They aren't going to engage with Malaysia as a country. That is reasonable. And there's nothing negative in this. I mean, the most you can give it, I think, is probably a two for a mission. But then again, no, you can't because Wing Rames is.

Yeah. So, like, it might be, might be a one. How do we feel about, how do we feel about green being a kind of normal? And they could be character in a movie. Gay, he's playing it gay. I want to give a one for that? Yeah, I guess. I guess so.

That is, that's kind of troubling. Okay. That's just unnecessary violence. It's, it's, I mean, zero, right? Like, it's... Pretty low. There's not that much... There's the scene where they're kind of dunking each other and like the knife thing, but...

I kind of think that that's torture. That's necessary. He's meant to be on the size of the cops. It's kind of... Yeah, you have the guy holding the cookery, like, to her neck. That's... Okay. Yeah, I could see...

I could see that being like a two. Sort of... He's meant to be a bad guy's. Yeah, I can give it a two. Like, light. I'm like, you know, you, yeah, you couldn't, you didn't need to, like, you didn't need to threaten her life in that moment. You could have just sat there in the boat, you know? It's kind of, it's like part of a very well-trodden path, and that's not an excuse, right?

But, like, I would say that the difference between something like the familiar, like, unnecessary violence of James Bond and the familiar unnecessary violence of the Tumblr sexy man is that we kind of know that with the Tumblr sexy man it's going to come good, right? it betrays a deeper vulnerability, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Yeah, he is going to come good. Yeah. It's going to be like blowing all the dust off the cover of an old book. And then misogyny. Misogyny. This is a faxed question.

Yes, it is. Well, she is portrayed as being competent. She is not sexually menaced. In fact, she is the one who's sexually pursuing him a lot of. the time. He does lie to her. There is some disrespect going on here. I mean, I guess it comes down to a question of like, how misogynistic is this kind of plot in general? Yeah, I mean, I think she has an arc, right? And I like that she gets to display competence throughout it. It's not her fault that she's outwitted. She doesn't really have any sort of way of knowing.

and then by the end, even though he does save her, I like that she still has to use her own ability to get out of it, right? Like, okay, he's giving her the passport, right? But like, she still has to do the Jason Bourne thing. And I like that that's on her, right? And I particularly like that the ending of that is she's going to be riding this old man around like Aristotle, right? Like, it's not like back to the salt mines, you know?

I kind of like that. So I feel I feel like it kind of subverts a lot of the things that later incarnations of this would do. He's not Christian Gray, like I've said. He's not all assured all the time. Yeah, and she's not infantilized all the time as well. I also like that she gets to be sort of cocky,

especially in the climax of her big ice, so she's like, no, this is fun. Yeah, I really like. This is her heist as well. Like the whole second half, she is in control of it. She gets to outwit him, at least at the very end, which I like. Yes. So it's not just, he's just a flatly better thief than her.

So I really don't. Very low. No. Yeah. Struggle look at that. I might say, I might say a one. Like, very, very little. I don't know if it's that low.

I'd love it if there were more types of women in the movie. She's the only woman in the world. I guess part of the problem is that, like, if you're writing this kind of romance, then it kind of tracks for, like, every guy. die to be in love with her and a little bit jealous of him. And that's kind of how it plays out. And that's having any other female characters there kind of dilutes that a bit. I don't know, we could have had, maybe the security chief could have been a woman at the

tower, you know? Your sort of baseline stuff like that, then yeah, absolutely. Maybe Conrad Green could have been a woman, you know? Predatory, toxic, gay, lesbian in Malaysia. I'm done. Sure. Okay, okay. She's the only one.

I'd say two. Okay. Two for a mission. Yeah, okay. They omitted many women cultures. That gives it a total score of two, four, six, eight. Who do we appreciate?

Entrapment, a total score of eight, which is pretty fucking good. That puts it in the Hall of Fame for sure. It does. It's not the best we've ever seen, but it is still pretty fucking solid. That's really good. Very hard.

But the best we've ever seen was bicycle thieves, which got three total. That is going to be very, very hard to unseat. If you're in single digits on Kill Dave Spawn, you're doing very, very well. We've had a good run of single digits. Recently, blue collar was a nine, taking a thumb, one, two, three, the original was a nine. Because we're into dessert now. Maybe movies are getting better. Sexy beasts, six.

Yeah. These are the heists that we've been saving, you know? And so we've got some, like, good ones coming up that I think you're really going to enjoy. But yeah, that's... Also, we're just big romance heads on Kill James Bond. We're just big, big soft things. We love love so much. Yeah, absolutely.

Yeah. And that's so real. In order to be a third of Kill James Bond podcast, you have to love love. That is just fact. Yeah, no. Absolutely. Put it on. You must have love in your heart.

You must. But so that is entrapment. Can we get the drop of that as entrapment? Yes. Hey! This is entrapment. Entrapment. It is.

It is. Thank you so much for joining us. Do we know what the next bonus episode is going to be? The next bonus episode is going to be the one that we just recorded, which is, of course, true romance. Oh, amazing. Okay. Cool. Yeah, I was wrong earlier.

Okay. Which means our next mainline. Do we have a pick for the next mainline? I have a pick and it's horrible and you're going to hate me for it. Sure. We're going to spike the scum levels because I think as a good follow-up to talking about true romance, on the next bonus episode I think our next mainline episode

should be Reservoir Dogs Fuck yeah No you're so right You're 100% spitting We definitely sure Okay next mainline episode Reservoir Dogs Amazing okay

So join us Join us for that Thank you so much for listening Subscribe for the Patreon Subscribe for all of our other stuff And we will see you next time Bye everyone Bye

Bye as you just heard, Reservoir Docs. But if that is simply too long for you to wait, then you can head on over to our Patreon. Patreon.com slash kill James Bond, all one word, and sign up today for as little as five pounds a month to get access to our entire backlog,

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